#Ex-wife

[newyorkthegoldenage]

Ex-Wife, published anonymously in 1929, was a succès de scandale. The very title aggressively challenged American mores and morals; divorce was almost unheard of in the middle classes at the time. And Manhattan high life in the 1920s (the novel takes place between 1923 and 1927) gave the prurient everything they could wish: not just divorce, but promiscuity, abortion, smoking, and drinking.

And I had, for an instant, that feeling that New York was an altogether beautiful place to live, no matter what happened to me living in it—a comforting feeling that had come to me sometimes, of late, when I stopped looking to people for comfort.

Narrated by Patricia, it tells of her life after her husband walked out on her. She goes from grief and despair to acceptance to indifference while becoming increasingly successful as an advertising copywriter in fashion, and bedding numerous men. Her friend Lucia, a slightly older and more experienced divorcee, supports and mentors her.

Surprisingly, the book is vehemently anti-feminist. The 1920s were a time when women could vote and were free of Victorian behavioral constraints, but systemic sexism ran deep and went largely unnoticed—at least by Patricia and Lucia.

The book was filmed in 1930 as The Divorcée, starring Norma Shearer, who won her only Oscar for it.

Norma Shearer in The Divorcee

In the forward to the 2023 edition (whose cover is shown above), Alissa Bennett writes, "It's easy to get caught in the trap of Ex-Wife's nostalgic charm; there are phonographs and jazz clubs and dresses from Vionnet; there are verboten cocktails and towering new buildings that reach toward a New York skyline so young that it still reveals its stars."

The author's son, Marc Parrott, agreed. "The New York described here," he wrote in an afterward to the 1989 edition, reprinted in the current edition, "and this was true, I think, for 20 years or more—was much smaller, much more intimate, much safer and much cheaper than the city from the '50s on to the present. It was also cleaner. My mother called it 'shining.'"

This is how Patricia and Lucia react to Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue:

"The tune matches New York," Lucia said. "The New York we know. It has gaiety and colour and irrelevancy and futility and glamour as beautifully blended as the ingredients in crêpes suzette." I said, "It makes me think of skyscrapers and Harlem and liners sailing and newsboys calling extras." "It makes me think I’m twenty years old and on the way to owning the city," Lucia said. "Start it over again, will you?"

Second & fourth photos: NYC Past Third photo: eBay

[journeytothewestresearch]

Zhu Bajie's First Wife

In JTTW chapter eight, Zhu Bajie tells Guanyin that he inherited his cave from a mysterious figure:

It's called the Mountain of the Blessed Mound," said the fiendish creature, "and there is a cave in it by the name of Cloudy Paths. There was a Second Elder Sister Egg originally in the cave. She saw that I knew something of the martial art and therefore asked me to be the head of the family, following the so-called practice of "standing backward in the door." After less than a year, she died, leaving me to enjoy the possession of her entire cave (Wu & Yu, 2012, vol. 1, p. 212). 叫做福陵山。山中有一洞，叫做雲棧洞。洞裡原有個卵二姐，他見我有些武藝，招我做了家長，又喚做倒蹅門。不上一年，他死了，將一洞的家當，盡歸我受用。

I'm surprised that I've forgotten this "Second Elder Sister Egg" (Luan erjie, 卵二姐) considering how many times that I've read JTTW.

Yu (Wu & Yu, 2012) confirms that Zhu and this figure were married, for the practice mentioned above is a "colloquialism of the Huai'an region, referring to a man living in the woman's house after marriage" (vol. 1, p. 517 n. 31). This means that Zhu had a wife prior to "Green Orchard" (Cui'lan, 翠蘭) from chapter 18.

I was interested in learning more about her and found this Baidu page. It mentions that the luan (卵, "egg") part of her name is actually a transcription error, for the original 1592 edition of JTTW shows a different but similar-looking character. I checked my own copy, and found that it reads Mao erjie (夘二姐, "Second Elder Sister Mao") (see the right side of page 105 here).

Like Baidu, Pleco notes that Mao is the fourth (of 12) earthly branches, which is associated with rabbits. Therefore, Zhu's first wife could have been a rabbit spirit. Can you imagine the kids? They would be a strange pig-rabbit hybrid, pretty much an aardvark.

The Baidu page also mentions that their pairing may be an allusion to yin-yang theory since the fourth earthly branch, Mao (夘/卯, rabbit), is associated with yin wood, while the 12th, Hai (亥, pig), is associated with yang wood (i.e. they complete each other). This kind of stuff is over my head, so I don't plan to delve into it further. But this page does give an overview of the stems and elements.

On a related note, if we were to apply this yin-yang/earthly branch dating approach to Wukong, his partner would be a chicken! This is because the ninth earthly branch, Shen (申, monkey) is yang metal, while the 10th, You (酉, chicken) is yin metal.

[duffsmckagan]

1996-2019

[sodaclanandco]

Helloooo from Exwife!

[waheelawhisperer]

Kal'tsit during this event: I WALK A LONELY ROAD, THE ONLY ONE THAT I HAVE EVER KNOWN

[infiniterichesinalittleroom]

Married or not, however, a parent has a duty to support a child. And this matters a whole lot more than divvying up summer homes. Ultimately, marriage is for the sake of those children. And a couple who has no children, that's not a family. They are just two friends; friends with benefits and insurance coverage but just friends nonetheless. But divorce lawyers don't care about familial bonds; they are, by definition, in the destruction business. They destroy families. How many of them are least tangentially responsible for teen suicides and serial killers? Like generals who don't have to see the boys they send to war, they feign innocence with blood on their hands.

Bob Dylan • The Philosophy of Modern Song

[thetimehorse]

The Green Pill Secret: Embracing Change

In the final episode of the Summer Series, we get ready for the change of seasons with an episode about change. I recently quit my job and I’m loving it, because change is what I needed. Sure, I’m unemployed now, but I have a budget and a plan and am moving forward. It’s far too soon to panic! I also am happy to be alone. I still care about my ex but I’m glad I’m no longer married to her, even…

[ravens-and-rainbow-s]

My wish for my ex-wife

[conflictandscotchblog]

Turbulence On A Trip With My Ex-Wife (Part Two)

Read part one here

We landed in Dallas almost an hour late, but still needed to make our connecting flight to Oklahoma City. We landed in Terminal C and needed to be in Terminal A in about forty-minutes. What I was about to learn was forty-minutes, inside an airport, goes by in the blink of an eye.

For those who travel, after a plane lands, it takes forever to actually get their luggage and leave.

Why?

Because everyone takes their time retrieving their belongings from the over head, or from under their seats. Or, in the case of our flight, wait while a father re-constructs a stroller in the aisle for his three kids.

Every one stands at once, but no one moves. And I’m sure that many of those standing and waiting have connecting flights as well, but no one says anything.

No one, that is, except for my ex-wife, Arlene.

“Come on, people,” she shouted into the stifled air, “some people have connecting flights, they need to get off.”

That did nothing to move people along, and did everything to catch the dozens of dirty looks tossed in our direction.

When we finally were able to move down the aisle, and as the flight attendants wished us a good day, Arlene offered her advice. She recommended that, in the future, they should let people with connecting flights off the plane first.

“Yes, ma’am, thank you,” one replied, “and you have a good day.”

My ex-wife, changing the way that people will fly.

Since that flight, I wondered if what happened next was in direct proportion to Arlene’s advice to the attendants.

Before we left the plane, Arlene did ask one the attendant by the exit to double check our connecting flight. She reassured us that, yes, we needed to go to Terminal A (we currently were in Terminal C).

Dallas is a big airport. To get from Terminal A to Terminal C required us to take an escalator (tallest escalator I have ever seen) then wait for a Tram.

We did just that and, upon arriving at our gate in Terminal A, were informed that the gate had changed and we needed to go back to Terminal C.

Was this pay back for Arlene’s unsolicited advice to the attendant? The world may never know

Actually, there is no ‘may’ about it, we will never know.

Sabotage or not, tic-toc-tic-toc.

Time was on the run and, unfortunately, so were we.

I’m old, carrying luggage, over weight and out of shape. The last thing I should be doing on a Thursday night in Texas is run through an airport to catch a flight.

And, yet, there I was.

Back to the Tram, and again, we wait.

On the platform, we spoke to a man in full uniform. When he heard our plight, he was nice enough to doubled-check our departure time. He reassured us we’d make our flight.

“Are you a pilot?” Arlene asked the man in full uniform.

Taken aback, he smiled and joked, “What gave me away?”

“Obviously, your hat,” I said.

Took the Tram back to Terminal C, then down the three story escalator.

By this point Arlene, who does run everyday, was half a football field ahead of me, already at the counter. Two employees, and the pilot, listened as Arlene told them not to close the gate, and pointed toward me.

“If he has a heart attack,” she threatened, “it will be your fault.”

It was not an idle threat. In that moment, carrying luggage and running through the airport, a heart attack was definitely within my wheelhouse.

The pilot stayed with Arlene, I believe, to keep them from closing the gate until I got there.

And get there we did. We were the last two people to board, and more dirty looks tossed our way as we headed down the aisle to our seats.

Its a very short hop to Oklahoma City from Dallas, and a much smaller airport. No running this time, just a leisure walk to baggage claim where, Arlene still insisted, that her bag would not be there.

Spoiler alert, it was.

Dennis, Arlene’s ‘fiance’, who arrived a day earlier in Oklahoma City, waited for us outside the terminal in rental car. He also had a predetermined bottle of scotch for me, and a bottle of white wine for Arlene, to decompress after our travels.

First night, we stayed at a hotel close to the airport. Once there, we went to our rooms, dropped off luggage, found glasses and ice, and commiserated in the Radisson Hotel lobby with drinks in hand about our trip.

It’s was a long day, but finally in Oklahoma City, with the wedding festivities to look forward to over the next few days.

So, what did we learn from all this?

No over sized toiletries? Check.

Consolidate and carry smaller luggage? Check.

Don’t do connecting flights? Check.

Less travel (at least for me)? Double-check.

[waheelawhisperer]

Absent thyself from my office, Kal'tsit, for I must undertake a task of grave importance: bestowing upon Schwarz her daily allotment of ten thousand kisses.

[spitblaze]

I guess Chilchuck has brought us right back to 'adults who are short are child-coded and if you like them you're a pedophile' discourse huh

[playermagic23]

Nitish Bharadwaj accuses ex-wife of mental harassment; files complaint

Reports suggest that Nitish Bharadwaj has alleged that his ex-wife is not letting him meet their twin kids.

Actor Nitish Bharadwaj, best known for playing the role of Lord Krishna on Indian Television, has filed a complaint with Bhopal police against his former wife on the grounds of harassment and unruly behavior. As per current reports, Nitish has also gone to accuse his wife Smita Gate, who is currently the Additional Chief Secretary at MP Human Rights Commission, of not letting him meet their kids.

As per a report published by Free Press Journal, Nitish Bhardwaj has met up with the Commissioner of Police of Bhopal, Mr. Harinaryanachari Mishra to file an official complaint against his wife. In the complaint, he has reportedly alleged that his estranged wife has been not letting him meet their daughters – Devyani and Shivrajani and he has also gone on to add that she has been changing their schools consistently in order to deny him access to them. Nitish, in his statement revealed that his wife’s behaviour of denying him any chance to meet their daughters has affected his mental health, because of which he filed an official complaint against Smita on the grounds of harassment and unruly behavior.

According to these reports, Nitish has also asserted that they have filed for divorce in 2018 by mutual consent and the case is still pending in court. Followed by registering the complaint, the Mahabharat actor requested the Police Commissioner to intervene in the matter. Owing to the same, the CP is expected to have put Officer Phalguni Dixit in charge of the case.

[maudeboggins]

very interesting review of the divorcée in motion picture magazine, saying that the story of the novel is made "much more credible"? which i'd definitely disagree with lol. it's a good movie but definitely a weird adaptation of ex-wife

[cozylittleartblog]

nobody can stop me from chewing on concept art like a wild animal