#Hazbin hotel incorrect quotes
drowninnoodles · 2 days
I don't know
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don't tag it as radiostatic please
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chaoticace2005 · 2 days
Vaggie: Charlie just asked me if I wanted to go to bed but instead it came out "do you need to use the sleep?"
Vaggie: And then she just kinda looked really horrified at herself and whispered “maybe I need to use the sleep."
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iwozlegit · 3 days
Incorrect Huskerdust quotes
Angel: Alright, bro. I’ll see you next week.
Husk: Sounds good, man.
Angel: I think we just accidentally kissed…
Husk: Quick! Do something manly!
Angel: (High-pitch moan)
Husk: (panic intensifying) What the fuck was that?!
Angel: (crying) I don’t know, man. I’m so sorry!
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stormikitty · 3 days
Vaggie having lost her wings has me thinking about things that could've happened before the other characters found out she's an angel.
Vaggie: *in pain*
Someone: what's wrong?
Vaggie: you know what phantom limbs are? When someone who's lost a limb feels like it's still there and is in extreme pain? That. That's what's wrong.
Someone: but you're not missing any limbs?
Vaggie: do you know how many people have more limbs in the afterlife than they did in life? Just because I have the basic number of limbs that a human has doesn't mean that's all I ever had.
Vaggie: I used to only be comfortable wearing backless or low-backed shirts and dresses. I wonder if not doing that anymore would have been easier or harder to get used to if there was less going on at the time. I mean, that was 1 of the smaller changes I made as a result of what happened just an hour or maybe a few hours before I met Charlie. And some of the bigger changes were less things I had any control over or choice in and more things I had to deal with...
Charlie: .... I'm sorry you WHAT?- *gay thoughts*
Charlie: WHY'D YOU STOP THO?!?!
Vaggie: I got a couple of ugly scars on my back that I didn't want anyone to see...
Someone: why do you like climbing and parcour so much?
Vaggie: *misses flying* ... uh
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strawbxrrydonut · 2 days
Husk: Okay, but what if we went to dinner not as friends this time? Angel: AS ENEMIES?! Husk:
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simpingforvaggie · 2 days
Niffty:I think I might just put a knife in it.
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Vaggie:I think that's a really good idea.
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foolilazuli · 2 days
Eve: I just wanna say, Adam, our relationship is a good, solid relationship built on love and trust. Which is probably not mutual but I definitely trust you because you love me too much to stray. But if you did, I would cut your penis into two pieces and I would throw them into separate oceans. Probably the Pacific and the Atlantic, I haven’t decided yet
Eve: And I also want to remind you that the sex is good. It’s inventive. And best of all, the sex is quick, allowing it to be more frequent. Quantity over quality, I say
Adam: I’m a not a bad lover, it’s also quality
Eve: I mean, sometimes, yeah. But you sometimes make me think, what was that? I just- no.
Adam: But that’s not often
Eve: I mean, sometimes it’s just bad, very bad sex
Adam: But that’s rare!
Eve: This morning
Adam: I told you, I had a bad dream last night and I was still very shaky!
Lucifer: Oh, you poor baby. Sometimes you need big, strong arms to hold you after bad dreams
Eve: You are definitely not big, Lucifer, you pint-sized bimbo!
Lilith: I have also had sex with Adam, and yes, it is sometimes bad
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deviantplum · 3 days
Lucifer: I'm not saying I need a gigantic demon to physically crush the angst out of my soul, I'm just saying we should absolutely try that first.
Alastor: I'm not sure if you're trying to elicit excitement or pity, but you've succeeded at neither. I feel mild irritation for you at best.
Lucifer: Irritation can still lead to crushing so it just sounds like we're on the same page to me
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ihavebadtasteinmen · 3 days
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Lucifer: You read my diary?!  Alastor: At first, I didn’t know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book. 
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Alastor: Oh Angel! I have an idea for a game, its called hide and seek! I hide, and you seek professional help!
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chaoticace2005 · 2 days
Angel, who hasn’t had non-sexual romantic intimacy in decades (if ever): Wow, Whiskers, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How awfully lewd of you.
Husk: We literally slept together yesterday.
Angel: That's NOTHING compared to the lewdness of holding hands.
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floofdrawsstuff · 2 days
Lucifer: Hey, Al. Do you like Taylor Swift? I absolutely HATE her I just wanted to get someone else’s op-
Alastor: ♪~Haters gonna hate hate hate hate~♪
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shoto-kinnie-2k23 · 14 hours
Alastor: *throws a bottle of whiskey, smashing it on the floor* MOTHERFUCKER!!!
Husker: Hey, that whiskey was older than you asshole!
Charlie: What's going on with Alastor?
Angel: He just found out we're characters in a TV show.
Charlie: Oh yeah, that'd do it.
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Angel Dust hanging up a picture of a chicken in the hotel lobby: "Now everyone gets to see my huge cock!" Husk immediately coming over to see what Angel is hanging up: "Oh thank god." Angel Dust: "Why'd you come look so fast, huh?"
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wazzi2ya · 23 hours
Angel: Ladies and gentleman, we are gathered here today to answer an age old question—
Niffty: Yeah, what's Lucifer's deal? Is he single?
Angel: What? No. He's still hung up on his missing wife, c'mon.
Angel: The question is: who here does the best impression of Alastor, the Radio Demon.
Angel: You'll be judged on voice, body language, and overall lack of flair.
Angel: Everyone will perform the same scenario: Alastor eating a marshmallow for the very first time.
Angel: Let the Alastor-Off begin!
Husk, holding and critically watching the marshmallow: What is this glutinous monstrosity before me?
Vaggie, eating hers: The sugar in this is quite sweet.
Charlie, exaggeratedly eating hers: Oooh, mm-hmm mm-hmm-hmm-hmm!
Angel: ... That's your Al impression?
Charlie: I can hear him doing that.
Niffty, squishing hers: Looks like a sticky pillow~
Angel, not picking one at all: I don't care for it, jazz music.
Everyone: *Laughing*
Alastor, walking down the stairs into the lobby: What's going on here? What are you doing?
Angel: Al, hey, nothing. Just eating some marshmallows, care for one?
Alastor: Hm, marshed-mallow... *picks one and pops it into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully* mm-hmm mm-hmm-hmm-hmm!
Charlie: I KNEW IT!
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