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#He is a Batdad
hailkingphantom · 1 year
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Dp x dc
I know that a joke about bruce having adopted millions of kids and how the batkids tease him about it, but what happend if that "joke" have more truth than the batkids are aware of?
Its impossible for bruce to adopt all the orphans, homeless and sick children in the world, but if Bruce could afford the whole watchtower withour affecting his company or fortune why he couldn't afford medicines, houses, schools and others suplies to children thar really need it?
Why cant be Danny one of those children?
Bruce met danny in a undercover mission to investigate the mayor of a small town: Amity Park. At first everything seemed normal, until an unknow figure crashed in the billionare's house. A kid, who couldn't be older than fouteen, had been the one who caused the damage after falling. The kid was bruised and tired, but that didn't him from fly to beat an unknow creature thar appear of nowhere and had started to attack the people around.
That child was a hero of this town.
A child had to step up to do their job, his job.
He have a kid to adopt contact
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"Fuck!! Fucking bloody hell !!" Said a men, in front him was a glowing circle wich looked to become brighter and brighter every second
"Constantine! What is this!" Superman asked as he come back after knock of the last of the cultists. The room become colder and the heroes looked more and more concerned.
"The fuckers tried to summon the ghost king!! I tried to stop the summoning but its to late!!" The magician yelled. All the heroes there (WW, Superman, Flash, Nightwing) tensed except Batman. The bats sighed and told "Dont do anything, let him come"
"B what the—!" A thunder and flash of light interrupted him.
Black smoke started to cover the room, any light thar it wasnt feom the circle died. Murmurs and giggles surrounded the only occupants of the room, the shadows grow and sparkles appear.
The terrorific scenary was covered by tiny sparkles that looked like stars, and if you know well, you could see that it were in the same order as the real stars.
A orb of light came out of the summoning circle. Then begin to grow and form a figure, a tiny figure.
Snow white hair and glowing green eyes, a black hazmat suit and a some armor covering it. A cape in his back that reflect the universe with a symbol and a thin black crown, decorated with cold ice beutifuler than any gem they had seen.
Pointed ears perked up and a sharp smile appsr as the King look towards the heroes.
"W̷̜̟̞͔̔̓̍̈́̄̎̀̀̈́̉h̸̛̩̺͇̠̥̰͇̣̝̟̐͆̇͆̈́̆ö̷̠̬̗̬̫͕́͊͆͌̍͒̄͛̚ ̸͇̄̔̉d̶̻̠̼͇̽̾́̓͗̓̚ȃ̷̧͕͍̗̬͍͒̑r̵̲̻̗̎͐͆̽͑ẽ̷͖͔̣̩͈̯̜̹̈́̂͑̕d̸̡̀̇̊̋̌̔͐̀̂͠ ̸̼͍̜͈̖̭̟͑t̸̨̛̙̦̬̜̩͇͕͆̈́̓̄̕ơ̶̮̲͚̾̂̀̐͋̀̔̈͂ ̵̳͙̪͇̭͕̗̒s̶̖͒̀u̵̧̠̪͓̫̳͇̲̰̿̍̽̋̈̐̆̿͘͝m̸̛̩̫̟̱m̷̠̣̭̞͕͒̈́͋̕ő̴͖̘̥̰̞̣̟n̸̢̧͙̲͖̩̠̈́̇̂́͑̈̌̃̀̕ ̸̗̓̋͆t̴͉͈̣̅̒͆͜h̵̯̞͗ē̷̝̒̚͝ ̶̝͛̑̌͊́̎̚͝H̸̢͖̞̟̀ỉ̶̧̥̘̪̱͔́͛͊͋͆͗͌ͅg̶̝̞̿͐̇̉̚̚h̵̯͖̉ ̸̖̄̄K̸̬͕͕̩̘̮͎͕̮̔͒͆͋͐̏͐̚i̷̡̛̳̜̖̔́̐́n̵̺̳̫͆̓͠g̸̨̡͙͖̤͈̯̫̠̫̉̄̐̅́͑̊̇́͌ ̷̛͎̹͚̖̈́̓́̉̇̒̕͘o̵̭̙̦̻̺̳̮̜̗̞̊̐̈́̈́̍̈́̑͒̍f̵̧̣̩͎̟͇̕͜͜ ̵̨̛͖̼̼͙̭̍́͗̋̈́̊͜ṫ̶̥̉͒̽̀̾͗͝ḣ̸̲͎͚͚̟͚̙̒͌̈́͌̈́̚͝͝ͅḙ̶̢̜̱̼̟̩̫̪̽͆̓͊̃̽̅̄͒ ̴̧̙͈̳̘̜͂̊̅̊̃̌ͅḬ̴̪̜̲͔̮̱͑͒̆̚͜n̶̘̦̪̠̭͚̳̜̳͚̾̍̄̑̄̕f̷̪͈̯͚͉̖̦̥͌̐̈́̋͜ỉ̵͉̖͎͙͍̦̦̌͐̐͋̀͌̾͒ṋ̶̮͎͈̜̐̈́ͅị̷͎̳̾͆̾̓̿̿̂t̷͔̮͙͎̅̋̃̊͋̈́̊̚͠͝e̸̯̯̲̗̥̟̲̓̃̂́̏ ̷̖͔̣̯̜̲͇̅̏͝͝Ŗ̷͔̝̯̗̗̣̟̼̩̄e̵̢̘̘͈͙̐̆͜ͅā̵̠̙͍̰͔̠͉̻l̴̤̦̜̝̬̻̦̲͐́́̏̓m̷̛̠̱̥̓̀͌̓͆s̸̲̗͈͖̞̫̩̜̅͊̑̑̌̃̈́?̸̛̛̛͉̤̙͈̣̳̫̱̱̪̍͌͌̀́̇̚"
Constantine was going to talk when the bat interrupted him " Danny"
The king turned his eyes to the dark knight and sunddely all the pression dissapear.
"Bruce!" A cheerful, young voice yelled. It took a moment to the rest of the heroes realize that it came from the same king who talked with that inhuman voice before.
The young kid jump happily in the arms of the dark knight and embrace him.
"B, when did you adopted the Ghost king?!!?" Nightwing screamed hysterically.
The Bat looked at his son a confused, " Danny is one of the kids I support, I thought that you already knew it"
"how I supposed to know—! Wait. ONE OF!!!!?? HOW MANY MORE ARE YOU HIDDEN FROM US!!!??"
"Hidden??"
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frownyalfred · 5 months
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I need a John Wick scenario where some goon beats the shit out of one of the batkids but doesn’t realize which hero they belong to. Cut to them getting home like “yeah I fucked up that little red bird guy!” and all the other goons look at him like “you mean…Red Robin?”
“Yeah that guy. Wait, why are you all getting up—”
Everyone knows the robins are off limits from serious beat downs. Batman will come for blood, and he’s downright superhuman when it’s about one of his kids.
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ghost-bxrd · 2 months
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Prompt:
Instead of Dick or Tim, Red Hood straight up goes for kidnapping Bruce Wayne and keeping him hostage just to see how desperate the birds get in trying to find him.
It’s a foolproof plan. Batman won’t blow his cover unless absolutely necessary, and “Brucie” would never know how to slip away from a crime lord of Red Hood’s caliber. It’s foolproof. It’s perfect. Jason can keep dropping hints and make threats towards the birds and watch Bruce squirm without consequences if he plays this right.
But then “Brucie” keeps begging him not to hurt his kids…
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theaceofarrows · 4 months
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Damian: [walks into Bruce's office with his hands behind his back]
Damian: Father, I would like to congratulate you. You are now a grandfather
Bruce: [seconds away from a heart attack] W- what?
Damian: [reveals the hamster he was holding behind his back] Meet Ferdinand
Bruce: [slumps against desk] Next time... please- please lead with that... I'm begging you
-
Jason: [hiding in the vents with a camera] He actually did it, the crazy little son of a bitch
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firerose18991 · 5 months
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Literally anyone meeting bruce and his family for the first time: So how did you get so many kids by 30?
Dick: HE WAS A TEENAGE DELINQUENT
Jason: *shouting over him* HE LEFT MY MOTHER AT THE ALTAR
*tim is sitting, just happy to be included*
Bruce: BE-quiet.  They're ADOPTED!
Jason: *not a beat missed* Because he’s never known the touch of a woman.
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p1nkshield · 11 months
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Reporter: Tell us Bruce, why have you recently decided to work out more? Do you just want to compete with our Clark? Or is it-
Bruce: My kids.
Reporter: I’m sorry what?
Bruce: I work out so I can still lift them.
Reporter: …
Bruce: if you have nothing else to ask I’m going to leave now. Let’s go Jaylad.
Bruce just picks up Jason and leaves.
Jason looks like a large dog that clearly isn’t used to being in the air.
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Like this.
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harmleikurdraws · 20 days
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Bruce and Ace <3
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dragonpyre · 3 months
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Just a single batdad trying to feed his hoard of bat children
Based on that new Ben Affleck pic
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jstodd · 4 months
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the story of how jason is first adopted reads like a shitty sitcom and it's so fuckin funny. bruce saw this little boy stealin his shit and essentially snatched him up by the scruff and brought him home. im just imagining a 12 y/o who looks 9 dangling by the scruff of his neck in bruce's hold, absolutely furious -- kicking, spitting, cursing his ass out. and then there's just bruce, as serious as one can be, holding him out for alfred to see, going, "this is my new baby, please make him a sandwhich"
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salmonchan · 1 month
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WELL NOW I'M THINKING ABOUT IT TOO
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bruciemilf · 6 months
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The Wayne manor is not a quiet place.
Someone Is always doing something, talking about anything, teasing, bantering, playfully slandering, so Bruce grew accustomed to noise. Its hard not to, with his nest of birds.
But this particular topic has him on mute;
"Why do YOU get him when he's old?"
" Oh my GOD, Jason, I'm LITERALLY the oldest. You ALWAYS have to get everything!"
Jason isn't at all interested in Dick's dramatics. He wraps all 6'4 inches around Bruce's leg like an affectionate leech. "You're the fucking meanest! You'll probably feed B those gross ass protein shakes and force him to watch re runs of Realest Housewives of Gotham!"
"YOU TRIED TO BLOW HIM UP!"
Cass is strong like a tsunami and silent as a snake, jumping on Bruce's back, beautiful eyes full of threat. " Dad stays. Mine."
Bruce pipes up, " I have a retirement plan--"
"Getting railed everyday at the Kent farm isn't a retirement!"
Tim gives Steph a look of disgust. "Gross."
Damian isn't above pulling out his swords. " If I don't get Baba, everyone is dying. Me included. "
"Damian. What did I say about threatening your siblings with murder?" Bruce asks expectantly.
" Oh, I'm not threatening, baba. I'm making a vow."
Alfred doesn't pry his attention from the chamomile tea he's preparing. " Master Bruce stays with me."
"...Alfred, I don't think you'll...You know, be around when Bruce retires--"
"Was that a contradiction?"
They all gulp. The argument is settled quickly, and Bruce spends the rest of his evening with head on Alfred's lap and his hand in Jason's hair, petting like a cat, and listening to RHOG on the TV.
He loves the noise.
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deadsetobsessions · 3 months
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Green Lantern hovered in the doorway of the med bay. He’d been summoned, but he had no idea what for.
“You know, spooky, some of us have lives to get back to. Not everyone can exist off of just work and blood or whatever,” Hal poked fun at Batman, who rubbed at his jaw tiredly. Hal blinked, stamping down the guilt that arose at Batsy’s uncharacteristic show of any emotion other than stone cold rationality or exasperation or anger. At least they’ve moved past grunts. That just lends credence to Hal’s theory of Batman being an immortal, like Vandal Savage. Batman could totally pass for a caveman, he’s got the grunts down, for sure.
“Still not a vampire. We found the Ghost King. The one the GIW was trying to hide in their records.”
“Well, shit.” Hal’s expression flattened, remembering the unsanctioned government branch that violated the Meta Rights act to a degree where even Amanda Waller had washed her hands of them. Bats had found evidence that they were experimenting on a child when a “source” had hacked into the base and begged them to find the child. Phantom, the hacker had claimed, who had managed to destroy the portal to the Infinite Realms
Batman had tried to boot the guy out of the system, until the hacker told them Phantom was the King of the Infinite Realms.
That got Constantine terrified, which urged Batman into a full hunting mode to track down the king. Mostly in part because Constantine said something along the lines of, “If the King dies, the Infinite Realms will wage war and decimate us. And considering they’re the realm of the dead, we’d lose so badly, even the demons won’t help us out for our bloody souls.”
Granted, he didn’t have that terrible British accent Hal attached to his voice every time the Green Lantern thought about the sad trench coat wizard, but the point still stood.
“He’s not fully conscious due to… his injuries, but the moments where he was, he reacted best to the color green.”
Hal did not want to know what kind of creepy stalker things Batman did to get that knowledge.
“Oh, great. You called me because I’m green,” he said to Batman as he floated into the med bay. “I can be green. I’m amazing at being green.”
Even with the sarcastic tone, Hal made sure to up his lantern aura, glowing a bright neon green. It wouldn’t do to help start a war if he wasn’t green enough.
Hal looked at the Ghost King, and yeah, he could see why Bats was so off his stoic face game today. Because the Ghost King looked like a teenager, and Bats is a bleeding heart and everyone knows it.
Hal waved away Batman, “Go back to Gotham and drink your true blood or whatever. You look like you’ve seen the sun too much.”
Translation: go home, you look tired.
Batman nodded, in thanks, and left to sleep (probably. Hal has never caught the man doing something so… plebeian). Hal is left playing babysitter. To an inter dimensional being that could- probably more like “would,” considering the live dissection he went through at the hands of humans- destroy their entire planet and/or universe. Another Tuesday for the Justice League.
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frownyalfred · 1 year
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things all the robins were ready for when they began crime fighting: guns, getting shot at, being held at gunpoint
what none of the robins were ready for: 220+ lbs of one Bruce Thomas Wayne jumping on top of them and shielding them whenever bullets start flying
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ghost-bxrd · 5 months
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Prompt:
Jason hacks into Bruce’s comm when it becomes apparent that he cannot be trusted to keep his birds safe.
Whenever either Tim or Dick are in danger and Batman is nowhere in sight, Jason switches on his side of the audio line to provide mildly ominous commentary.
Bruce is sure his dead kid is haunting him.
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theaceofarrows · 4 months
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Family movie night
Jason: The Wicked Witch of the West had EVERY right to light Dorothy's ass up-
Duke: Here we go again
Jason: You think you're going to kill MY sister and steal her heels, you hillbilly bitch? I don't think so
Tim: [throwing his hands up] This is why we don't invite you to movie night!
Jason: Oh, so it's my fault that you're not man enough to hear the truth?!
Dick: Guys, shut up. They're about to start singing Yellow Brick Road
Damian: Todd is correct. The Wicked Witch has every right to avenge her blood
Dick: [groans]
Tim: That's NOT the point-
Steph: Ooh~ Tim doesn't believe in avenging siblings
Duke: That's cold dude
Tim: What?!
Jason: [shaking his head at Tim] You spineless bitch
[Screaming match commences]
Bruce: [turns on subtitles] So nice to have the family all together
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flamingpudding · 6 months
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He's my clockwork appointed babysitter, not dad.
They failed, even they managed to beat all the cultist in time. The ritual was still completed. The leader was laughing like a maniac until Hood hit him hard with the butt of his gun, knocking the guy out cold finally. With held breaths, they watched how smoke rose from the ritual circle higher and higher until it started to form a black shadow with stars as eyes and too many teeth and limps. Batman was on his way with Constantine. Maybe they could at least contain whatever that was until they arrived.
"Who in the name of all good and holy dared to summon me?!" A static scratchy voice echoed in their ears.
No one dared to answer at first but of course Red I-fear-nothing Hood had to open his mouth earning him death glares from his siblings. "Aren't you like a demon? Why would you mention anything good and holy?"
That think was blinking at them and Tim did a double take when that think moved its many limps like it was rubbing the back of its neck.
"In the name of all bad and cursed then?" It sounded unsure still a booming echo like voice but unsure. They shared a look. Dick opened his mouth, ready to say something when suddenly a familiar voice shouted from behind them.
"Cut the crap kid! They are the Batsie and his birds belong to the good!"
They turned to see Constantine marching in with Batman right behind him. The man was throwing the but of his cigarette way as he went right up to that demon. Which apparently was not one because right as the Brite was up to it a puff of greenish some blocked their view for a moment before a white haired child stood where the demon had been seconds ago.
"The hell you doing out here kid. I told you to stay at home."
"You try resisting a summon when your all new to the fact that you can get summoned!"
"Your going to make my hair gray faster, you little chaos gremlin."
"Aw love you too!"
"Uh Constantine?" They had question of of them was that Constantine was apparently familiar with that child, demon, whatever.
"Right." The man lit another cigarette but before he could even take one drag of it he side eyed the child staring up at him before he flicked it to the side. "Bats my demon son, Danny the Bats."
"Demon son?"
"Actually I am-" They watched how Constantine covered the child's, Danny's, mouth with his hand shushing the boy.
"What did I tell you about interdimensional secrets? That's right, do not talk about them to just anyone. We are not repeating the Green Lantern incident."
Should they feel offended? It felt like they should. They weren't just anyone.
"Constantine." Batman gruffly warned, but the man held up one hand towards them. Batman was definitely offended that Green Lantern got to learn something he wasn't getting to know on Constantine's watch.
"One moment Batsie. I need to- did you gremlin just lick my hand?!"
The moment Constantine removed his hand the child stuck his tongue out at the JL Dark member and made a break for it to hide behind Batman.
"Get back here you little..."
"No! I am always stuck at home, and you promised me I would get to see the watchtower at last month!"
Batman blocked Constantine from getting to who was apparently the man's demon son. Staring at the man as the boy grinned in triumph.
"Mate get out of the way, this kid needs to get grounded again."
"For what?"
"Being a chaos gremlin that won't listen."
The rest of the batfam had only one burning question on their mind. "Which demon was willing enough to have a child with Constantine?"
Well, except for Tim who had caught the little tidbit of interdimensional secret and was wondering who Danny really was.
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