#Holy shit I lost the number somewhere-!

[mondaymelon]

₊˚ෆ 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃, 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐕𝐄! | sagau lyney, neuvillette, wriothesley x gn!reader

ˋ°•*⁀➷ cw: theme of obsessiveness, yandere (big surprise!!) lyney + wrio's part mentions past abuse, all the stuff that comes as a side to this au !! ngl neuvillette's part is pretty tame he's literally. just a guy (otter)

⤷ [ you, the heavenly being who created celestia itself, has descended upon teyvat in an earthly form. a god, or at least, theirs. ]

— sagau!lyney has always lived to be beheld by the eye.

Displays of extravagance, bouquets of flowers and pairs of white doves fluttering from his finger tips. Yes, that was where he belonged, standing on his place at the center of the stage, bright lights fixed on his form as he swept in his arm in a wide bow towards his beloved audience. Listening to their adoring cheers and drinking it all in - their support, the fame, their fanatic attention.

Attention was always something he had yearned for. Cold days exist in his memory, where he wandered the street aimlessly, pale skin littered with growing purple bruises, his only refuge the light tug of Lynette's soot-stained hands clinging onto what rags he wore. In those times, he remembers, a faint voice from above, angelic and holy, soft and compassionate.

A voice that was, in fact, yours. You had stared with wide eyes at your device as the cutscene began, instantly overcome with emotion. "Lyney, Lynette... was this how you had been living? Goddamn, I know every character in this game has a tragic backstory, but look at them!! They're... they're precious!! Wahhh, I want to take you in... Lyney, you better come home..." They were merely throwaway comments that you had blurted out in the shelter of your room, absolutely fixated on their pretty character designs and the dwindling number of primogems your inventory held. Not only had you lost the 50/50 to Qiqi herself, you were now nearing hard pity, and the charming magician was still nowhere in sight. You shut your eyes "Ah... Lyney, how come you-"

Light flickered before your closed eyelids, and you felt the wind tug at your body. Your stomach lurched, oh shit, were you falling..?

"-won't..."

Someone caught you with ease, swift and capable arms holding you, one supporting your back and the other hefting both your legs. Twinkling purple eyes met yours. "Ah, are you alright?" You quickly shook your head, too shaken to speak words at the moment. Surveying your surroundings only brought another wave of confusion - strange buildings, glittering blue lakes and trees, an unfamiliar landscape... Your gaze shifted, and you caught the sight of uncanny ash blond hair, and the hat that sat atop it. Lyney?

He hummed in acknowledgement. "So, you've just fallen from the sky." There was no way in mistaking his voice. "Is there an explanation behind that, or...?"

"I...I- I don't know why I'm here...!" You stuttered, and he visibly flinched at your voice, eyes widening. Shit, had you done something wrong? You trembled in his arms, attempting to stand by yourself, but he wouldn't let you move from his grasp.

"I see." His voice was quiet, now, and came in a single breath. His pupils shook as he closed his eyes in a smile. "Then, shall I bring you somewhere where you'll be safe?"

His heart was racing, pounding against his chest, and he could hardly breath, instead taking in short, desperate little gasps that did little to keep him standing. You.

It was a voice he swore he'd never let escape his recollection, and now there was a face, and touch to pair it with. He smile widened, and his eyes shined with pure ecstasy. It was you, in the flesh, his archon, his god, the highest being. Your body was holy, and he longed to praise it, his dark heart being cleansed just by bathing in your presence. Yet you seemed so fragile in his arms, how cute... it wouldn't be fair to keep you to himself, but being selfish is what allowed him to get this far. Like a songbird in a cage, he'd trap you, admire you, worship you.

Your brows furrowed in confusion, and you could feel his smile's sweet grow more sickening every beat of silence that passed. "No, What? I-"

His hand struck the back of your neck. Your voice died as your eyes fluttered shut. And in that moment Lyney pressed a kiss to both of your closed lids, a tender touch that one might describe as "loving", but what truly lie beneath it was far more twisted. His heart beat only for you, and red flushed across his cheeks.

"There's no need to worry, my eminence. I'll put on a show, just for your delight." ₊˚ෆ

— sagau!neuvillette has always yearned for warmth.

A warmth is not present in the courts of Fontaine. There, it is cold, sharp, the biting frigidness numbing the hearts of people - those who stand before him in trial, and those who watch with glee in the crowd, awaiting his final verdict with bated breaths.

Neuvillette was most renowned for his judgement. But it was his own that was a critical flaw. For what truly was judgement? Had he been justified in casting a murderer, in some eyes, but a hero in others, into the Fortress of Meropide? A mere child, who just sought for warmth, just as he had? He fears his heart has also grown cold and indifferent to the world, and he despises himself for it.

Was it not your warm hand that stroked him lovingly so back then, a quiet, soothing touch that swept away the tears and the salt that clung to his cheeks? Was it not your voice who called out to him on those ever so lonely nights, humming an otherworldly tune as your ghostly visage wiped the sorrow that flowed his downcast eyes? Yes, truly. It was your warmth that caused his eyes to glow anew, your warmth that allowed his cheeks and the tips of his pointed ears to flush with contentment.

"Oh, wise ludex! This man is a murder! He stole not only my mother's assets, but my mother's life!" The crowd gasped at the dramatic declaration, their gazes shifting back and forth, from the perpetrator to the "witness." "I will dearly miss her... this man, no, this monster, took my mother away by hitting her over the head with none other than a bludgeon!"

Neuvillette's eyes widened. "Mr... Lucas."

"Y-Yes, ludex?"

"It was never disclosed to the public of what weapon the killer used."

The crowd erupted into a series of sharp inhales, surprised noises muffled by a hand over the mouth, round eyes as large as dinner plates, and frantic head turning. Journalists scribbled frantically in their notebooks, sweat pouring from their faces as they stumbled upon their newest cash cow.

"The verdict. Mr. Lucas is found to be guilty."

And they cheered. For what? Neuvillette narrowed his eyes just a fraction, his displeasure rising. They knew nothing. They were just mindless puppets, willing themselves to follow the sway of the crowd, praising and applauding something that naught needed its praise.

A sensation came over him, like the soft caress and flutter of an angel's wings or a soft, sweet sigh escaping from pouting, half-opened lips. The man snapped his head up, hearing the glass behind him shatter and plummet downwards like crystal raindrops, but what verily sent his heart apounding was the sight of a figure, dressed in heavenly silks, bathed in golden light, and descending into the courtroom. He drank it all in with a bated breath, hearing that for once, the crowd was silence.

You landed in his arms. Beautiful. He almost didn't dare move with you in his arms, in fear of his legs giving way underneath him. Your head lulled into his chest, eyes shut, and your pure, unbridled warmth finally met him, finally doused him in its prescence.

"Your... your eminence..." His voice was a mere echo, quiet, containing little sound at all. "I..."

"To you who has granted me such the blessing of warmth, I shall repay with all of my heart." ₊˚ෆ

— sagau!wriothesley has always wanted... someone to hold him.

It's a selfish thing to long for, and a silent one. Who would pay any heed to a duke's ramblings? Love's a thought that he's never quite fully digested, almost as if he can't truly believe it exists. Of course, he's seen Fontaine's couples, strolling up and down the street, hand-in-hand, yet questions himself in what makes them able to love each other. Perhaps it wasn't his problem with them, but more so a problem with himself.

Ah, that was it.

His heart already belonged to someone, someone he had heard once and never witnessed again. Like the softest breath of the wind, or a joyful child's laughter, it brushed through his soul and soothed it, held it in its arms, and fussed over his messy hair and bruised skin. At times, Wriothesley wondered if it was all a dream, for only something that angelic, mesmerizing could not stem from reality. However, as young as he was in those years, he cannot deny the fact that in his dark days - it was your mysterious voice that carried him into the life, your presence that gave him the wings to continue living.

Yes, since that day, his every breath, every flutter of his eyes and every pump of blood that rushed anew into his veins from his heart was solely for the purpose of meeting you once more.

Another typical day at the Fortress of Meropide - paperwork strewn all over his once-organized desk, a cooled cup of tea sitting next to where his hand lie, the other furiously writing away on the said paper. He ran a hand through his hair, grumbling into his palm as he briefly shut his eyes... only to shoot them back upon in a start as he heard the sound of something crashing against the walls, and the sound of paper, flying everywhere akin to a bird.

There was someone, lying, or rather, sprawled across his desk. Dizzy-eyed and muttering something intelligible, a growing red spot on their forehead gradually becoming increasingly more visible. "How did you get in here?" He's immediately put up his defenses, readying his gloves as he steps over - with quiet remorse - the papers that now blanket the ground.

"...Wh...Where am I?"

That. That voice.

Has he stopped breathing? He can feel all the blood rush to his head, and he can hardly think a single coherent thought, only focusing on the rush in his ears, the shaking of his hands, and the sight of you before him, dressed simply in sleepware and glancing around frantically. Gorgeous. Ethereal. The mere sight of you before him had spurred his heart into an erratic, fanatic pace, beating within his body like he'd die if it slowed down.

"Is... Is something wrong?" He was taken aback at the hand waving over his eyes, before settling back into position, realizing that you had been trying to speak with him for the past half-minute in his zoned-out state. Could you see it? The sin that was clearly displayed in his every breath, in his every inch of being?

"No, nothing's wrong." You seemed to have calmed down somewhat, and while your eyes were still filled with confusion, you tilted your head at his words. How come he was smiling...?

"Ah, then about that question-"

"Home. You're home. And this is where you'll be staying, forever." ₊˚ෆ

(a/n) ugh i swear to god i hate every single thing ive ever written for wriothesley he seems so yucky and out of character WJODJKFLJDSMF>

REBLOGS APPRECIATED!! please consider following me as i amm soosososoo close to a follower goal ive been wanting to reach and itd be crazy if i could reach it before christmas!!!

໒꒱ || ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ (open! send an ask or a comment ♡) : @manager-of-the-pudding-bank, @iamdedinside, @ilyuu, @achlysis, @swivy123, @scara-is-my-wife, @lupicalbestwolf

-> teehee what if yall left a message on my christmas tree 😶😶😶

[piratefishmama]

I Wish | Part 3

He barely recognised his friends. He was just glad they were themselves though. That somewhere along the way to a stardom he didn’t remember going through, his band hadn’t lost anyone. That someone hadn’t been replaced.

That happened a lot, didn’t it? Bands losing members due to circumstance, arguments over direction, infighting... but they were there. Older, Gareth had a little grey in his hair, Jeff had shaved his down completely, he didn’t have braces anymore, taller too, neither as weathered as Eddie but… definitely older, and Dougie...

Fuck, he'd slimmed down.

Eddie didn’t know if that was an improvement or not, he instantly found himself missing what had once been, he was still big, still broad, but... where disarming chub that Eddie had on more than one occasion fallen asleep on had been, soft muscle resided in its place and Eddie found himself wondering just how the biggest of four of them had done it. Whether it'd been through healthy choices or godawful ones like himself.

It was muscle though, it looked like healthy muscle, so... probably healthier than him. Good for him.

“Oh look who's joined us in the land of the living!” Gareth chirped, his mouth half full of pancake, syrup dripping down his lips.

Jeff, to his left “Saw Louie stormin out kicking up a storm, that shit for good this time?” Asked with a tone laced in caution, as if the subject was touchy. God what had Eddie done in the past that made his friends think they couldn’t rib him about relationships?

That was like... their whole thing back in high school, Eddie, and his disastrous non-existent dating life. He’d trusted them and them alone with who he was, with what he liked, and while there were the obvious ‘do you find me hot?’ questions at first, the playful ribbing, the teasing, the jokes only friends could share… he had them. They weren’t afraid of him. Afraid to hurt him because they knew they never could.

How had he lost that?

Eddie looked to Steve in a bid for help, Steve wasted no time in coming to his aid “One can only hope” with obvious exhaustion in his retort, his hands on his hips, a deadpan expression that Eddie couldn’t stop himself from smiling at.

Gareth snorted a little laugh and followed with “Amen to that, dude.”

“He’ll be back though, he always is.” Dougie piped up around his own bite full of some oat concoction, it looked gross. “Once he sees his job offers dry u—what?” The other two were giving it the kill signal, twin expressions of panic, as if he’d said too much… god who was he? “You fuckers know I’m right, Eddie knows I’m right, he’s a clout chasing pretty boy riding Eddie’s coattails to fame, just cause you’re too chicken shit to say anything to him doesn’t mean I am.”

Eddie looked to Steve again as Dougie spoke, only to receive a silently raised brow in return, he was on his own. “Well—” Eddie began, the other three froze, even Dougie’s attention was on him now, all three clearly expecting something “not anymore! Dunno what I saw in him, but I’m done, Steve, if you would… uhm… make sure he can’t contact me again?”

“Want me to block his number?”

“What?” Eddie whispered behind his hand, brows furrowed in confusion, block? A number? What?

“I’ll sort it.” Steve would sort it, and of that Eddie had zero doubts. He wouldn’t doubt the genie about anything ever again. Louie and his overly manicured entire self would never darken his doorstep again, of that he was certain.

“Holy shit, who are you and where did Eddie go?” The panic gone, Gareth seemed genuinely surprised by his declaration. He'd missed too much, too many things he didn’t know, too many things he’d done that he couldn’t apologise for because he didn’t know what he'd be apologising for. it'd be cheap, it'd be pointless.

Eddie hated everything. He could have probably lived with it, with his lost time, had this not been his first experience of the day with people he recognised. He couldn’t. Not like this. Not with his friends looking at him like he were a bomb ready to go off.

He could put on a brave face though, even if the muscles in his face felt foreign, even if he felt tired... he could act the part. “Turnin over a new leaf I guess... self reflection, new path, bachelor life never hurt me too bad, right?” His friends shared looks, a silent communication happening between them that made Eddie feel isolated, othered, outside, and alone.

He wanted out. To run.

And as if he knew, Steve’s hand found his shoulder and squeezed grounding him in place. He was there, the Genie was there, he'd fix it if Eddie wished him to. He wasn’t stuck, Steve just wanted him to live the day. Experience it. Be brave, it wasn’t permanent.

Jeff broke the silence though, he stood up, crossed the distance between them, that gigantic chasm that seemed so impossible to cross seconds before, and clapped his hands to both of Eddie's biceps, his straight toothed smile blinding “nice to have you back then, Eds, now eat your fuckin breakfast an let’s get this stupid talk show shit over with, yeah?” Okay... maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

Fuck the ‘old' Eddie, the Eddie who Eddie himself had never met and never wanted to meet, he had his friends, he'd be fine. Maybe he could even stay.

“Sounds good, what's for breakfast?”

“For you? Nothin but the good stuff, man, ordered you some wholemeal toast with avocado an egg whites” so many words, so little recognition in his eyes.

What the fuck was an avocado? Was that a real thing?

“...Can I not have pancakes like Gareth?” Gareth with his syrupy monstrosity.  

Dougie scoffed around his oatmeal, swallowing before he responded because at some point during the last thirty years he’d developed manners. “With your cholesterol? Fuck off, dude, we don’t want you having a heart attack on stage.” Steve only offered him a sympathetic smile in consolation. The beautiful bastard. “It's avocado toast or oatmeal, your choice old man.”

Strike being able to stay. He wanted to go home.

Eddie didn’t like Avocados.

He decided this the moment a semi-hard glob of green mush touched his tongue, lightly seasoned, mixed with something tangy, he hated it, hated the smell, hated the unexpected texture, hated the taste but he ate it. He pushed through like a little champ when every instinct he had told him to rebel against it, to demand French fries or something stupid that definitely didn’t come as a breakfast food.

Maybe he could swing fast food later, see what the future held for the fast food joints.

Later seemed too busy though, the moment they were done with breakfast, the band were whisked away into some kind of car, something way fancier than Eddie had ever seen, to get to the venue and prepare. Hair, makeup, the usual routine that Eddie wished he had an ounce of experience with because back at the Hideout it was just… them climbing up on the rickety old stage Bev’s late husband put together on the fly and letting loose.

There was no pre-gig warming up, no hoard of professionals tugging them into various chairs and rooms to make sure their hair was the correct brand of artful frizz, or mess of floof, or women with brushes coated in powders to minimize the shine from the studio lights that’d make their skin too shiny for the cameras to work with.

Wardrobe was fool proof as they were presented with options that ranged from smart casual to red carpet. Everything suitable for a talk show and nothing fit for a ‘metal’ band, which was strange considering they were advised to go for something they could move in as they were going to be performing during their run through, maybe more than once to make sure all angles were covered.

It was a lot, it was a hell of a lot, Eddie kept finding Steve in his peripherals though. Always there, silent, and observant off to the side, close enough to step in should anyone cross any boundaries but staying out of the way of the professionals so they could work unhindered.

It was grounding in a way, him there, even if he looked so very human despite what he knew Steve to really look like, having him there, knowing the man could get him out of the chaos at any time was grounding.

All those people touching him, all the noise around him, sounds, smells, lights, the pushing, and pulling, and the tugging on his hair, he wanted to scream, he wanted to get away from it all, he wanted—

“Alright, five minute break.” Steve stepped in, his voice firm, without room for argument. “Rockstar needs a breather.” Eddie could have kissed him, genuinely. The relief as all those professionals took a few steps back was instantaneous, that feeling only growing when Steve managed to corral them out of the room entirely, leaving just them in there.

The other band members were in their own rooms, Eddie clearly some ‘big shot’ that he didn’t quite get. Sure he was the front man but… they always said they’d be equals if they made it big. They’d always scoffed at the idea of multiple green rooms, of putting single members on pedestals, that was how shit went sideways, that was how infighting and breaking apart happened. They’d stay grounded, stay real.

They didn’t want that bullshit and yet there he was. All on his own, his friends elsewhere being prepped without him. He hated it. How had it happened? “I should be used to this, shouldn’t I?”

“What makes you think that?” Eddie damn near jumped out of his skin when Steve was just. Right there. Stood beside him in the reflection of the mirror. No longer looking all that human, he looked like himself, golden and beautiful, wearing the clothes he first saw him in.

When he turned around, the human looked back at him, smiling as if he knew what Eddie was looking for. Reflections showed the truth then. Interesting.

“I’m—fuck that's a cool trick, man... but i'm a fuckin rockstar! I should be, I dunno… used to it.” At the very least his old man brain should have caught up by now, right? He should have gotten used to it all, muscle memory of thirty years having passed should have at least kicked in a little, right?

He still felt like that kid from the trailer park on the inside, still felt completely overwhelmed.

He’d just been dropped into a life with no memory of living it.

“Who said you ever got used to it?” Steve hadn’t said that. In fact Steve had painted a pretty sad story of addiction and self-destruction. “Eddie… some people aren’t meant for this kind of life, yes, you’re very talented, you’re absolutely good enough to get this far, and once you’re on stage you are incredible—” for a moment, just a moment, Eddie felt warmth, a teeny sprinkle of warm pleasure trickle through his weary soul at the easily spoken praise. “The weariness fades away and you’re… yourself, everything that you are shines through and it’s breathtaking.” Eddie really did try not to blush, but he felt the heat in his cheeks anyway, as it turned out, older men could definitely be flustered by a cute guy thoughtlessly praising them “but the rest of it… everything that goes along with it… not that I’m an expert or anything, but I don’t believe it’s who you are.”

“I can’t just adapt?” All Steve offered was that similar look of sympathy he’d had in the bathroom back at the hotel. No… no Eddie knew the answer before he’d even asked it. He’d never been able to adapt. “Why?”

“If it helps at all, there’s millions of people out there who feel seen whenever you talk about your struggles with what happens behind the glamour, so many people who love you and support you for the very things that make you struggle so much, for the fact that you keep going, you made it despite them. I’m not going into the why’s and the how’s, but adapting really isn’t something you’re very good at, Eddie, there’s no changing that. You get overwhelmed, that’s just you.”

“Can I wish to change it?” Did he even want to? Not really, something told him it’d backfire somehow, not by Steve’s design, not on purpose, but… it just would.

“You can… I can work my magic, but you wouldn’t be you. You wouldn’t be the person your friends love, the louder than life DnD loving nerd, you wouldn’t be that anymore, and I like that person, he’s very sweet, so I really don’t want to.” There it was. At least Steve wasn’t just letting him make that mistake. “There’s a life out there that is perfect for you, and trust me you will find it, this just isn’t it. Do you want to go home?” Steve wasn’t going to force him to stay, he wanted Eddie to experience it for this very reason, to see the truth behind one of his biggest dreams, see the chaos behind the curtain of a life that maybe he just wasn’t suited to.

He could go home if he wanted to, but… “No. Not yet. I wanna experience it, just once, y’know? Even if it’s gonna suck, I think you were right, I think I need to.” If only to really drive it home that maybe fame and fortune wasn’t everything.

That maybe he didn’t have to be famous, maybe he didn’t have to be some metal legend, he could just… be. And that would be okay.

“Got it.”

“Will I at least know the song we’re meant to be performing here?” Given how little he knew about his present self, the very real possibility of his music having evolved, of new songs being written, it was an issue he really should have thought about by now, but Steve snapped his fingers, an otherwordly light flashing in his hazel eyes for the briefest of moments, and then he smiled.

“You will now.” And that made him feel a little better. Just a little. Until the chaos continued and the professionals filed back in to finish their jobs, the five minutes up.

Part 5

[alltheweirdkidsinoneplace]

Eddie Munson + potential Iron Maiden references

because I'm hyperfixiating and desperate. Also apparently not everyone was raised on 80s metal, so this might be new to some people and gatekeeping is lame. None of this is confirmed obviously and I'm probably reaching but here we go

let's start with the most obvious one: This is Iron Maiden's mascot. His name is Eddie. He's been on every single album cover, most single covers, merch, posters... He looks a little different every time, but he's always undead.

This is the cover artwork for the 1982 album The Number of the Beast. It features A huge version of Eddie, controlling the strings of a red, devil-like creature, which in turn holds the strings of a tiny version of Eddie. The Devil (Vecna, there I said it) is not shown to be aware of Big Eddie controlling him. It's all very double agent, The Spy parallel. Also if you take just the frame of Big Eddie's hand and the devil, it looks A LOT like Eddie Munson's puppetmaster tattoo. With a little fantasy and even more reaching there's also some vaguely mindflayery shape in the background of the image.

(probably irrelevant but still fun fact: This album was released on March 22nd 1982 - EXACTLY four years before Eddie Munson became the main suspect in Chrissy's death)

This one speaks for itself. We've all seen the Eddie prequel book that's gonna come out later this year with literally the same title as this 1983 song.

Interestingly, Eddie has batwings here, aka KAS THEORY CONFIRMED?

This one, holy shit. This is the artwork for the 1986 (!) album Somewhere in Time, and if the year and title weren't enough, there is so much more.

1. Again starting with the most obvious: There is a graffito on the wall to the very right that literally says EDDIE LIVES.

2. Under the graffito we see a hand reaching up from the ground (grave?). The version of Eddie that we get here is a cyborg, and the hand on the ground looks very cyborg-esque as well. The band members are seen a little towards the left as normal humans, so it's not like everyone's just a cyborg in this world. Ergo the hand belongs to a second Eddie, which is very in line with the whole "there is another timeline with shadow selves"-theory.

3. The red clouds in the background are very vecna-y.

4. The little winged figure from the Flight of Icarus cover is seen left of the big tower in the middle.

5. The neon sign of the movie theatre to the very bottom left contains the words "Live After Death" (illegible here, but it's there!)

6. The lyrics on this album! In particular Wasted Years, featuring the lines "But now it seems I'm just a stranger to myself

And all the things I sometimes do, it isn't me but someone else"

- again, very much in line with shadow selves. And even more Stranger in a Strange Land:

"Was many years ago that I left home and came this way

I was a young man full of hopes and dreams

But now it seems to me that all is lost and nothing gained

Sometimes things ain't what they seem

No brave new world, no brave new world

No brave new world, no brave new world

Night and day I scan horizon, sea and sky

My spirit wanders endlessly

Until the day will dawn and friends from home discover why

Hear me calling, rescue me

Set me free, set me free

Lost in this place and leave no trace

Stranger in a strange land

Land of ice and snow

Trapped inside this prison

Lost and far from home

[...]

They found his body lying where it fell on that day

Preserved in time for all to see

No brave new world, no brave new world

Lost in this place, and leave no trace

What became of the man that started

All are gone and their souls departed

Left me here in this place so all alone"

Does that sound like someone left for dead in the Upside Down or is that just me?

7. idk a fuckload more in the cover probablay because it's wild.

Bonus Metallica fact: Master of Puppets was released on March 3rd 1986. Eeven if he bought the album the day it was released (he would) that would have given him under three weeks to rehearse it so much that he could give the most metal concert ever on March 27th.

Anyway that's just from the top of my head; I might add on to it if/when I think of more. PLEASE spam me with your theories I beg you.

Side note: Contrary to popular belief, if you got into metal because of Eddie: That's awesome! Welcome! Again, gatekeeping sucks; we've all had our minds blown by a Metallica song for the first time at some point, so let's be nice to the newcomers.

[kj-1130]

meeting her

sporty!riri x bookworm!reader

warnings: disgustingly romcom-ish

a/n: heyyy…been a min lol. anyway y’all know them scenes in the romcoms where they be switching pov’s with the same event or wtv? yeah it’s like that:)

also reblog…i’m begging you pls

riri williams masterlist || main masterlist

     You were walking out of your last class of the day, checking over yourself to make sure you had everything. Exhaustion laid over you heavily, and you were not willing to make the trip across campus from your dorm if you had forgotten anything. 

     Once your fears had been eased you checked your phone next, going over the reminders you had been given, and trying to see if you could work out a nap somewhere in between all of your tasks that had yet to be completed. Head so deep in your device, you failed to notice that the pathway in front of you wasn’t clear. Next thing you knew, you bumped into something very solid and all of your things dropped to the floor.

-

     Riri was bragging to her friends about her little basketball win in a 1v1 scrimmage she had earlier that day. She was walking backwards and giving them vivid details that none of them asked for. 

      They were used to it, though. Every other day she was talking about a different sport she participated in and how fine all the other players were. It was volleyball one day and softball the next. Sometimes she’d even convince the boys to let her play, especially when it came to basketball, just so she could laugh when they all lost (every last one of them was a sore loser. It made the game more fun for her). 

     So into her storytelling she failed to realize that her friends were trying to warn her about something. She honestly thought they were just trying to get her to shut up. Next thing she knew, someone had ran into her back and there was a loud crash. 

-

     You dropped down to the floor immediately, not wanting to face any confrontation. There was no telling if who you had bumped into would be overly angry at you or not. 

     You were so frantic in your motions, you failed to realize that the person you hit crouched down to help you. 

-

     After a couple seconds of staring at you in shock, Riri finally came to her senses and began helping you pick up your stuff. She didn’t want to trigger an attitude or cause you to be upset with her. After all, she was the one who wasn’t paying attention to where she was going. 

- 

     You reached out to grab the last book, only for a hand to lay on top of yours. You looked up instantly, your eyes meeting warm brown ones. 

     ‘Wow,’ you thought to yourself.

     You had to stare for a couple moments. Someone like her was helping someone like you. You were starstruck, caught in her beauty. She was wearing some baggy cargo pants with a compression shirt that showed off the definition of her muscles (not that you were paying attention to that). 

     While your eyes were trailing over her, you noticed there were other people gathered behind her, more than likely her friends. That knocked you out of your daze real quick, not wanting to make more of a fool of yourself.

-

     ‘Holy shit…’ Riri thought to herself. 

     You were stunning to say the least. Your lip liner and gloss combo went together perfectly and complimented your skin ton (not that she was staring at your lips that hard). Your glasses frame went perfectly with your chill yet nerdy aesthetic and Riri couldn’t help but be drawn to you. 

     She started apologizing for running into you, not wanting to seem like a total weirdo. She got nervous when you abruptly stood up, but followed your lead, wanting to stay face to face with you.

      Handing over your stuff, she got ready to talk, only for you to mutter a quick thanks and begin to walk off. She wasn’t about to let you go like that so she getnly grabbed your arm before you walked off. 

     “Can I get your number?” 

-

     She had handed you back your stuff before she popped the question. You were hoping to make a quick getaway but it seems that it wouldn’t be happening. 

     “I’m Riri, by the way,” the woman clarified. 

     You gave a quick glance behind her at her friends. It made you weary.

     “You for real? This ain’t no joke, is it?”

     She looked back and followed your line of sight and quickly shook her head. She looked more offended than anything but made a point to reassure you. 

      “A hundred percent genuine--promise.” 

     Hesitantly, you ripped off a piece of paper and began writing the digits on it. You hoped on a shooting star (it was still daytime) that she’d text you back--she was exactly your type.

     Reaching your hand out, she grabbed the paper from you. With a soft smile that made your knees weak, she walked off with her friends following behind. 

     You were on cloud nine on the way back to your dorm. A pretty girl asked for your number--not one of your friends’ but yours. The walk back was a blur as you thought only about your interaction with Riri (was her chain silver or gold?). 

     Unlocking your door, you walked in and settled in your bed after placing your books on your desk. Your smile slowly faded as you thought back. Dropping back onto your bed, you let out a groan.

     You forgot to give her your name.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

taglist (messsage for removal)

@sebastian-vettels @blueposthings @idek-5 @jesuswasnotawhiteman @sirsell @augustvandyne @uselessgay101 @emiliaisdead @evilcr0ne @bunnyweasley23 @daniphantom1 @voidsaddiction

[thatgoblin]

~::~ Summary: After a drunken night with a man name John, Reader finds herself in a position they had never thought they would be in. ~::~ Fem!Reader, 1st POV.

[WARNINGS: Brief pelvic exam, swearing, grief, sibling death, family issues, vague speak of abortion, cursing, unplanned pregnancy, vague-ish descriptions of drunk sex]

::AN-This is just part one of the series, I'll go through the whole pregnancy and maybe after. Enjoy!::

Tequila was always responsible for my mistakes. I should have kept my promise of never having more than one shot, but that quickly went out the window when I bumped into him. He was tall and handsome and smelled of scotch and tobacco. I was pretty sure I complimented his mutton chops and that’s how it started. A few beers and more than a couple of shots later, I was pressed against his door as we kissed like drunk college students during Rush Week. Eventually we made it into his house with giggles and drunk stumbling, at least getting to his bed before the main event. 

I was going to have beard burn by the end, but that wasn’t important. What was important was that I was half undressed as the man ate me out like he’d been starving for it. While I don’t remember every single detail, the broad strokes of the night were there, I knew I had had a good time at least. It probably wasn’t the olympic level of sex I thought it was at the time, it was still pretty good. The next morning, he made me coffee, told me his name was John and if I ever wanted to have another fun night again to give him a call.

“So, why haven’t you called him?” My friend Jesse asked as we sat at a table in a cafe, once I'd finished telling him about John. I had called him and asked for some adult talk because holy shit did I need it. 

“Because I honestly forgot, but now I really do need to call him buuuut I lost his number,” I said. 

“Oh no, did you get the clap?” He asked, shirking away.

“Worse,” I groaned, leaning back in my seat. 

“Ew, herpes?” He asked, scrunching his face up.

“Even worse,” I said, putting a hand to my belly. “A lot more noticeable than herpes in the next few months.” 

“Oh. . . Oh shit,” he said, raising his brows. “I mean, are you sure it’s his?”

“I’ve only slept with one person in the last four months thanks to my ex, so yeah, I’m sure it’s John’s,” I grumbled. I knew that would be everyone's question, probably even John's, but it still didn't feel great to hear.

“Sorry, just checking,” he said, holding up his hands. “So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. It’s. . . It’s still early and it’s not like he HAS to know as I’m not sure I want to keep it,” I said, poking my sponge cake with a fork. “I don’t even want kids. I never planned on it, not even with Paul and he was my longest relationship.”

“Oh Paul,” Jesse said wistfully. “It’s all his fault that this happened. If he hadn’t cheated on you so many times, then you wouldn’t have been looking for a rebound.”

“Well the tequila didn’t help either,” I snorted. “Doesn’t make a difference. I’ve still got to make a decision and it’s getting close to the deadline for the permanent one.”

“Have you gone to a doctor yet?” Jesse asked.

“Yeah, right after I took the pee test at home. I wanted to make sure so I didn’t panic over nothing,” I said. “They said I’m about 7 weeks along. I didn’t want to do any tests other than the blood lab, and since I could give them the date of my last encounter, they were able to figure it out from there.”

“Man, that’s wild. Have you told anyone else? Your family?”

“Absolutely the fuck not,” I choked out as I sat up. “They will never know if I can help it. No matter the outcome, they are not in my life for a reason.”

“Because they’re fucking psychotic?”

“Because they’re fucking psychotic. Damn right,” I huffed. It had been so long since I’d had any contact with my family. My parents were still back in Inverness for all I knew and my older brother was somewhere with the military. Last I had heard was that he’d made it to Sergeant in SAS and that was because I had run into an old friend from school. It had felt so sad to find out through gossip essentially. Someone I had been so close to growing up was now a complete stranger.

“So, if you keep it, can I be the Daddy?” Jesse asked with a grin.

“Jesse, you can barely keep your rabbit alive, I’m not letting you parent my fake plants let alone anything that comes out of me,” I groaned, shifting to sit up.

“Hey, Sassafras is doing amazing and he’s even getting a brother soon. Don’t be bad mouthing my babies,” Jesse pouted. 

“Sorry, sorry,” I said, rubbing my face. “I shouldn’t be taking the stress out on you. That’s not fair and I’m sorry.”

“Those hormones are messing you up, BAD,” he said. 

“Yeah, they are. I don’t get sick at least, but the mood swings are giving even ME whiplash." I was silent for a moment, contemplating the possibility of telling John. The good, the bad, and the more than likely to happen heart break if I made an attempt to have something outside of our one night stand. 

Paul had done a number on me. We’d been together since secondary school on and off, but the last four years we had become so close and in tune with each other. We could tell when the other needed something without saying anything and were genuinely happy where we were. I had been at least. It turns out he’d been fucking some hen from his work the entire time and had gotten her pregnant. When that happened, a switch had flipped and I didn’t know the man anymore. He moved out when I had gone to work one day, leaving me in a lurch with rent and a place that I had so many happy memories with him in. 

"Maybe it’s better if I just don’t tell him,” I said softly, shaking my head. “I mean, we could be really bad together. All I know is that he’s in the military and is never around. If I wanna raise anything, I want my partner to be there with me and I already hate being alone. I’d probably lose my mind if it was just me and it on our own. Besides, he probably doesn’t want something like this. Otherwise he’d have it by now.” The man was good looking, funny, and with a military career, he could have married someone and had kids with them by now. 

“True, but what if you guys work really well together?” 

I went quiet, trying not to let a fantasy of me and John form. Paul proved that it doesn’t matter how long you were with someone or how close you got, they will still break your heart when you least expect it and act like it was nothing. 

“Don’t let him ruin your future, Boo,” Jesse said, reaching over to take my hand. “He’s taken enough from you. There’s no reason to let him have more.”

“I know,” I said softly, squeezing his hand. “I just wish I knew what to do. If someone could tell me for sure if me and John would work out or not, that would be amazing.”

“Well, I’m sorry that I left my crystal ball at home,” he said, letting go. “But maybe give it a try. At least you can say you gave it a go.”

“Yeah, but I have to find the guy first and I don’t remember his number or where he lives,” I said. 

“Well, how about putting that detective brain of yours to work? You watch all those crime dramas, why not use it in real life?” He asked.

“Because this is real life and not DCI Banks,” I said, giving him a pointed look.

“Just retrace your steps. Do you remember the bar you met him at? Maybe he’s a regular,” Jesse said, rolling his eyes. 

“True. That’s actually a really good idea,” I said, tapping my chin in thought. “I mostly remember what he looks like too. Well more than mostly, I could probably pick him out in a lineup. He was really good looking.”

“Oh yeah, that’s definitely going to help you find him. Just ask the bartender for the really good looking guy,” Jesse snickered.

“Shush. Well, it seems that the, uh, Shit, what do I call it?” I asked. 

“Are you asking me what to call the fetus inside you?” Jesse asked, raising his brows. 

“Yeah.”

“Just call it Bug. You know? Or even Bean. It’s like, what, the size of a grape?”

“Little smaller. I think the internet said it was the size of a blueberry.”

“That would be cute, but it also sounds like a safeword,” Jesse snickered.

“English people do really like beans,” I said. “Let’s go with Bean.”

“You’re English too!” Jesse cackled.

“No I’m not! I’m Scottish! There’s a difference!” I cried, throwing a napkin at his face that he easily caught. “Fucking American with your Mountain Man accent telling me I’m English. My Last name is MacTavish, that’s not fucking English.”

“I’m Appalachin, Darlin’. I’m not just any Mountain Man,” Jesse grinned. 

“I’ll be sending you back by punting you over the ocean if you don’t knock it the fuck off,” I hissed. 

“The mood swings are going to be killer with you,” Jesse snickered.

“Don’t,” I sighed. “Just don’t. But it seems I'm keeping the Bean after all."

“Good luck. I mean it. Being a single parent ain’t easy, but you’re not on your own with this. Even without John, okay?” He said, reaching over to squeeze my hand again. 

A few days after my lunch with Jesse, I was at the bar that I had originally found John at. It was packed for a Thursday night and the thick smell of alcohol was making me nauseous. Getting to the bar, I flagged down the bartender in hopes they would know him.

“What can I get ya, Love?” He asked, leaning in so he could hear me. 

“I’m actually looking for someone,” I said, climbing up to kneel in the seat so I could lean over the bar. “I don’t know if he’s a regular or not, but I figured I’d try.”

“Sure, what’s his name?”

“John. I don’t have a last name, but he’s tall and built, has dark sandy hair with a mutton chops beard. I think he’s in the military,” I said.

“Oh yeah! John Price! He and his men are regulars,” the bartender nodded. “Just saw him a few days ago actually. What do you want him for?”

“Well, I’ve got something for him that he left when I last saw him and I only got his first name and haven’t been able to find him,” I said. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I could find him other than here, could you?”

“Sorry, I only know him from here. Maybe if you come back tomorrow he might be here. He usually shows up a bit earlier than this,” the man said with a shrug. I nodded and thanked him, giving him a few quid for the help. I decided that I could hang around and see if he still shows up that night while I dug around to see what I could find on social media. 

Getting a Shirly Temple, I grabbed a corner seat and spent about an hour trying to find him online, but the man was a ghost. Nothing. No Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, not even a LinkedIn. What was I supposed to do? Give my number to the bartender and hope he remembered to give it to John? That is if he would. He’d probably just toss it. There was no way I was leaving my number on a board in hopes he’d see it. That was how I would end up on a true crime Youtube channel. 

About to call it a night and escape the bar that was building a headache in the base of my skull, I shot a text to Jesse to let him know I tried the bar and at least got a last name. As I turned to put my phone in my purse, the chair opposite of me was pulled out. Looking up, I couldn’t believe my dumb luck.

“Heard you were looking for me,” John said with a chuckle. His deep, gravelly voice was just like I remembered it as he was grunting in my ear while he-

“Yes, I am,” I said with a nervous laugh. “I, uh, know that it’s been a while since we last saw one another and I planned to call you, but I lost your number.”

“You know you don’t have to make up a story if you want to have a pint with me,” he said, a soft smile peeked from under his whiskers. 

“Oh, no, I really lost your number,” I said, straightening up in my chair. “I also have the memory of a goldfish, so when I realized I had lost it, it was too late. But you’re here now.”

“That I am,” he said, nodding with a hum. Almost getting completely lost in his shining blue eyes, I quickly gave him my full name. 

It was very clear as to why I had started to flirt with him in the first place. The way he looked at me, making me feel like he knew exactly what he wanted and it was me. 

“It’s nice to get a full name, after almost two months,” he said. “It’s lovely to meet you, I’m John Price.” He held out his hand for me to shake and damn it, I was melting into his touch. His hand was warm and rough, but firm. “So, were you seeking me out for an introduction or maybe I could buy you a drink?”

“Uh, I was actually looking for you because. . . Well. . .” It felt like the words were getting stuck in my throat, trying to choke me to make me leave and pretend nothing happened. 

“You want another go where we’re a bit more sober and able to have more fun?” John offered with a wink as he leaned forward to sip his beer he’d brought over with him.

“I’m pregnant,” I blurted out. He furrowed his brow, staring at me.

“Congratulations?” He asked slowly.

“That’s why I was looking for you,” I said with a heavy sigh. “I’m pregnant and about 7 weeks along. If you do the math. . .”

“I see,” he said, nodding. Sitting back in his chair, he fiddled with a coaster, staying quiet for a moment. I didn’t want to push it or scare him, so I was patient. “And you’re sure it’s mine?” 

I had prepared myself for that question, made sure it wouldn’t bother me by asking myself that same thing over and over, but hearing his tone and seeing that flash of doubt on his face made me want to hide in shame. I didn’t shame people for how many people they had slept with and while I didn’t have sex with strangers, it felt like suddenly I was this ‘loose’ person that was trying to get every single dick they could and use the system to get free stuff. The next nine months were going to be hell on my body, but sure, I only did it for free stuff and to control a man I had met ONCE.

“You’re the only person I’ve slept with in the last four months. So, yeah. I’m very sure,” I said, feeling my chest start to tighten. Anxiety began to twist my stomach like I was wringing my hands under the table. “I don’t want anything,” I added, nearly choking on my own spit. “I mean, I don’t want you to feel like you owe me or the Bean anything. I just wanted you to know, so if you did want to participate at all, you could. If you don’t want to, that’s fine. Again, I just thought that you had a right to know.”

“That did go through my mind,” John said with hesitation. “I know you said you don’t want anything, but it wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t help out at all. A support check at least.”

“That. . . That’s up to you. I’m not going to take you to court over it. I figured if you ever want a relationship with the Bean, then we can work something out. I’ll keep you updated on anything you want to know or I can just leave you alone,” I said. That part was hard. I didn’t want to be a single mum and I didn’t want to be alone, but I also didn’t know John. How many relationships went sour because two people had a kid and chose to stay together instead of separate because they thought it would be better for the kid? Too many. 

“I think I’d like to know,” he said, looking up from the coaster to me. “I’d like to be involved as much as I can be.”

“Okay,” I said, twisting my napkin more. “Okay, we can do that. Um, I have a doctor’s appointment next week. If you want, you can come. It’s just a general check up.” 

“Yeah, I can do that. Just let me know the time and place. Do you want to meet there or I can pick you up?” He offered, that look coming back again. John knew what he wanted, but I couldn’t tell if it was me or the Bean. That wasn’t something I thought I would need to worry about. Would he think I wasn’t fit to be a parent by myself? Did he have family that could raise the Bean and think it would be better if they did? The prospect of being betrayed to have the Bean taken away was suddenly very real and terrifying.

“We can meet there. Here’s my number, so you can keep it and I can’t lose it again,” I said, sliding my phone over to show him my number. He added my number to his phone before adding his to mine then sliding it back to me. “I’ll go ahead and send you the details. Um, okay, I just realized how, well, how silly this sounds, especially after me giving you my information, but I just thought of it. You aren’t a crazed serial killer, are you?”

John let out a bark of a laugh, his shoulders shaking as he chuckled. “No, no. Nothing like that. I’m just a captain in SAS.” 

“That’s what it was,” I groaned. “I knew it was military, but I couldn’t remember exactly what it was.”

“To be fair, I didn’t exactly tell you,” he said, leaning forward again, much more relaxed by my ice breaker question. “So what is it that you do?”

“I’m a restaurant manager for an Italian place on the south side of town. Ciao Bella.”

“I’ve heard of the place. Always good things. I haven’t eaten there before, but now I might,” John said. 

“It’s a pretty good place. I recommend it and not just because I work there.”

The longer we talked, the more comfortable I felt with him. I still wasn't sure if he wanted me or the Bean, but it was starting to look like both of us. When I was ready to go home, he offered to drive me home and when I declined, not for lack of him trying, he walked me out to hail me a taxi. There was a bit of awkwardness at the good night part. Did we kiss? Did we high five or wave? In the end, I gave him a one armed side hug that he happily returned. 

Once I was in the taxi and down the street, my phone buzzed with a message. 

'I forgot to ask, but why do you call the baby The Bean?' I snorted and shook my head. 

'Because you English really like beans and that's the size of it right now.'

'You're English too.'

'No, I'm Scottish! There's a difference!'

'You’re right. Out of curiosity, are you related to or know a Johnny MacTavish?'

Fuck.

'Is he from Inverness, Scotland?'

'Yes. You know him?'

I had screwed up. I had seriously screwed up. I couldn't bring myself to answer him, not even when he called once I got home. It had been almost a decade and I still couldn't bear to think of him. He was supposed to be the good one. He was supposed to help me and comfort me and instead he abandoned me. If John knew him then I couldn't be around John. I couldn’t put myself or the Bean through what I had gone through the last time I’d seen him.

Once inside my flat and my door locked, I turned off my phone so I didn't have to listen to it buzz with calls and messages. How could I explain to him even the very basics to begin with? I couldn't without giving away every dirty, dark detail of why I cut him out of my life to begin with. 

Laying in bed as I felt sick, I couldn't help but think that I made a mistake. I never should have looked for John and I never should have told him. It could have been dealt with quietly and quickly and I wouldn't be so attached to it. Wrapping my arms around my belly, I started to cry. Why did I try and do the ‘right thing’ for myself? It never worked out, it wouldn’t be any different from Paul. He’d find out and he’d either leave or take the Bean or worse, would make me believe he was a good person till I truly needed him and it turned out to be a lie the whole time.

When I had ghosted John, I don’t know why I thought he’d just disappear. Why would he, after finding out I’m pregnant with his Bean, not do anything to track me down and make sure I wasn’t dead in the gutter or smuggled to another counter? While I had no information to go off of to find him other than a bar, he had plenty for me. Between my phone number, my place of work, all the information on my social media, and the doctor’s appointment that I had given the details to, I was somehow surprised to find him waiting for me at the front of the clinic the day of my appointment. It had been almost a full week since I’d seen him and had been ignoring his calls and texts in hopes he’d either talk to Johnny and find out why it was better that way or would just give up. 

“Ah, shit,” I groaned under my breath, seeing him sitting on a bench as I walked down the street from my bus stop. John had already spotted me before I could try and go another way in, giving a wave as he stood up to meet me. 

“Do you want to talk about why you pulled a Houdini on me before or after the appointment?” He asked, meeting me halfway.

“Afterwards. I haven’t eaten today and I don’t have the energy to explain everything in great detail like you’ll want it to be,” I said with a sigh. 

“Why haven’t you eaten?” John asked, frowning a bit.

“I woke up late after pulling a double shift. Turns out when you’re pregnant you get tired much more easily and if you stop moving, you do fall asleep no matter where you are,” I said, rubbing my tired eyes. There were dark circles under my eyes for sure and I probably looked like I had rolled out of bed after a week of doing nothing. My clothes were wrinkled, my trainers dirty, and my hair unwashed for the last week. John meanwhile looked put together and had done everything on his to-do list for the next month in six hours. 

“Alright, yeah. We’ll go for food after this and we can talk,” he said with a nod. Turning, he opened the door for me, letting me lead the way to the receptionist. After checking in, we found a pair of seats together in the corner. As I looked around, I felt more shame creeping up. It was a government run clinic, which meant people who weren’t well off were there and that meant stereotypes. The mum with two kids screaming while pregnant with a third, one who didn’t look older than 15 with her own mother, and one who looked like she had nicotine patches on her arms as she bounced her leg and scowled at the room. It was what I could afford as I didn’t have private insurance and John didn’t seem the type to have been in a place like that before. At least in the UK. 

I began to worry if he was silently judging me, reconsidering everything about me because we were there and not some posh doctor’s office with pleasant music playing softly while pretty people with white, toothy smiles were all around. 

“Ms. MacTavish,” a nurse said from the door to the exam rooms. Standing up, John and I followed. She took my vitals and weighed me before taking us to a small room. 

“Do you want me to hold anything?” He asked softly, minding how the room made our regular voices sound like we were shouting. 

“Oh, yes, thanks,” I said, handing my purse and jacket. I hopped onto the exam table as he held my things, moving his chair closer to the head of the table instead of at my feet. At least he was being polite. We waited a bit in silence, but it was actually comfortable. It was odd, given most people would be talking about anything and everything to avoid the fact that I was about to have to take my pants off and have someone else stick their fingers inside my fanny. 

The doctor came in after a bit, knocking then coming in without an answer from me. She immediately went to wash her hands before looking over my chart, not looking at me yet. “Okay, Ms. McTavis, you are here for a regular pregnancy check up, and is this the father of the child?” She asked, misspeaking my name. The woman looked like she was either going to ask for a manager or call the police on someone for being too loud two houses down. 

“Yes, this is John,” I said, not even bothering to correct her. I probably wouldn’t see her next time, so it didn’t matter.

“And how long have you two been sexually active together?” She asked, continuing to read over my chart and make notes. 

“Um, just once,” I said, earning a raised brow from her. “We had a one night stand. What does that have to do with the visit?”

“Ah, are you sure he’s the father?” She asked, looking down at my chart to write a few things and ignoring my question.

“Yep, the only person I’ve slept with in four months.” This was a nightmare. It was one thing to go through this with just myself, but having John there to see and hear the questions was humiliating. If we had been married or a committed couple, it would be different, but because we weren’t, I was the irresponsible one.

“All it takes is just once with no condom or pill and here you are. Alright, go ahead and take your trousers and pants off and we’ll do a quick pelvic exam.” Instead of leaving the room, she drew a curtain around me after handing me a gown. I just tried to keep any signs of embarrassment to a minimum so we could get through this. 

“I can hold those for you, Love,” John said softly, once I was changed. He was standing up with his eyes down, but holding out his hand for me to give him my clothes. 

“Thanks,” I said in a near whisper, handing him my things before getting back on the table to put my feet in the stirrups. Letting out a breath, the curtain was drawn back and the doctor scooted in on her rolly stool with gloves on and ready to go. “Lube’s a bit cold,” she said, smearing it a bit before pushing in a finger then two. It felt so uncomfortable and hurt slightly, making me even more embarrassed that John was there to see it. She had to adjust my legs, spreading them wider and higher, making it harder on my body as she did the exam. 

This was completely different from him having his head buried between my legs or him seeing me completely naked on top of him. Part of me began to wonder if I was just stupid for offering to have him at appointments with this happening. I had probably scared him off for good. Parents who wanted kids, who were trying for them, this wouldn’t bother them. We had an accident and this was forcing us to be much more intimate in an alien way.

“I need you to stay there for a moment, I forgot to grab something from the supplies,” the doctor said, pulling the curtain so I wouldn’t flash anyone when the door opened. When it closed, I tried to keep my sigh quiet, but again, those fucking rooms made a whisper sound like borderline yelling. The quiet fell over us once more, but this time, John stood up to move his chair closer. Sitting back down, he was right next to the table. He reached up and took my hand in a loose hold, giving it a quick kiss as we waited. If I wasn’t so anxious or ready to throw up, I would have cried at his sweetness. 

Once the doctor came back, she finished her exam and said everything looked good and she’d see me in four weeks. After finishing her job, she closed the door behind her after letting me know to take my time if I needed to and just leave the door open when I left. John stood up, letting go of my hand, to grab some paper towels for me. I quietly thanked him as I cleaned up myself before taking my clothes back to dress. When I was done, he took my hand in his and walked me out of there. 

Outside, I felt better, but only so much. The close interior of the clinic and the chemical smell from disinfectants were not longer trying to smother me along with my embarrassment at least. Now I had to explain everything to John and expect him to be okay with it after making him sit through that?

“If you’d like, I could get you on my health plan and you could go see a different doctor,” he offered as we kept walking. I wasn’t really paying attention to the direction as my hunger was starting to overshadow everything else, my hands getting a bit shaky had him stopping us. He looked over my face as he held both my hands, silently taking stock of where I was at. “Let’s get some food in you before we talk about anything else, yeah?”

“Please,” I said, nearly bursting into tears. Goddamn hormones. Putting his arm around me, he led us to his car to drive us to the nearest restaurant. 

After we were inside and food was ordered, delivered, then devoured, that was when he started to talk again. 

“I meant it earlier,” John said, using a napkin to wipe his face clean of crumbs. “I can put you on my health plan and you’ll be able to go to a different place.”

“I appreciate it, but this is fine,” I said, tearing up pieces of bread to sop up any juices left from my meal. “It would be a mess to change providers and this is the easiest place to get to from my place by bus.”

“You know you can ask me to take you to your appointments. It’s not a problem,” he said, looking over my plate that I practically licked clean. “Want anything else to eat? My treat.”

“I feel like a broken record a bit, but it’s fine. I’m good,” I said, fibbing a bit. Ordering a small portion didn’t exactly work in my favor, but I didn’t feel comfortable relying on him much more than I already had allowed myself to. “As for my appointments, you won’t be able to take me all the time and when I hit 28 weeks I go every other week, then at 36 weeks it’s once a week. It’s a lot to ask of you and I can do it on my own. I promise, I’m an adult.”

“Even adults need help from time to time, besides, I said I wanted to be involved,” he said. When the waitress came around to ask if we wanted anything else, John turned to look at me and waited patiently. The waitress seemed to understand what he was waiting for as she turned to look at me with a sweet smile.

“I’ll have a burger and fries. Adult portions, well done,” I said after a few seconds of panic deliberating. The man seemed unable to stop himself from trying to take care of me as much as possible. That should have been a sign to me that he was a good person and would do anything for me and the Bean. He probably did that to a lot of people around him as well. The waitress took my order with a nod then was off.

“Now, about the health plan,” John said, picking up his mug of coffee. I could see the slight smile he was hiding behind it and wanted to slap it out of his hands. Ugh. He was going to drive me insane with being so nice and helpful.

“As long as I don’t have to marry you or move in with you to be on it,” I said with resignation. 

“Done,” he said. “I’ll get you the paperwork for you to fill out and that’ll be that.” 

“Sounds good,” I said. 

A quiet fell over us as he stared at me and I refused to look at him. I knew what he wanted and until he asked, and even then, I wasn’t going to offer it up. 

“So,” he said, setting his mug down to lean against the table on his elbows. 

“So,” I said, picking up my fork to swing a bit in my fingers as I leaned back in my chair.

“You’re Johnny MacTavish’s little sister?” 

“Depends on who you ask,” I said with a shrug.

“If I were asking you?”

“Then I would say that I don’t have any siblings or immediate family.”

“And if I asked him?” I looked at his words. John was watching me, every movement, every small twitch or tell. The man was waiting for me to lie or to tell him the truth.

“Then he’d tell you he had two younger sisters. One is deceased and the other is one that he and his parents don’t talk to or see,” I said, shifting in my chair. “You didn’t tell him, did you? About me or us or the Bean?”

“No,” John said, shaking his head. “I thought you two might be estranged partners at first, but I did my own digging.”

“Yeah? What’d you find out?” I pulled my legs up in the chair to sit criss cross, unable to keep his gaze for too long. 

“I found out you went to secondary school as Johnny was starting the military and your sister was working at a local shop. Once you graduated, you went a bit wild, I would say. Partying and such. Then your sister died in a drunk driving accident and you disappeared for a bit,” he said. “But I’m still not getting the answer as to why you ran when I mentioned Johnny.”

“That is because he and I don’t speak. I haven’t spoken to him or my parents in almost a decade. Basically since our sister died,” I said, keeping my gaze on the paper straw cover that I was folding. John was quiet, letting me get the words out on my own time. “I had been at a party that night and had been drinking. So, I called Saoirse to come pick me up. All my friends were pretty pissed at the time, so I thought I was doing the right thing, you know? Not leaving with the drunk people and getting a sober driver.” I swallowed hard, feeling my chest tighten as I tried not to let the images of that not conjure up in my head. I didn’t even get to know what happened fully till my cousin Mike told me and that was nearly two days later. 

He and my other cousin Seamus were the only family I still considered to be family. They were military like Johnny, special forces in SAS, but they were older. Mike was nearly 60 and Seamus was pushing mid 40s, but they had always been kind to me and never treated me differently. Especially Mike. He’d send presents for Christmas and my birthday, things I actually wanted while my parents would give me the bland socks or clothes that I hated. He still did when he could. All he had were his brother Paulie left as his parents were gone with no spouse or kids of his own. Mike got me through the grieving, but he never spoke up like Saoirse did. 

“She was on her way there when one of the guys that was at the party left, and he hit my sister when he was trying to race someone else that was drunk. When my parents found out where I had been and why she had been there, they blamed me for her death. Johnny wasn’t around much because he was off doing military stuff, so the only story he got was from them. I never got to explain to him what happened or find out what our parents told him. He wouldn’t look at me even at the funeral when the family was gathered together. I ended up drunk halfway through and left. No one followed me aside from my cousin Mike. He let me stay with him till I could get my own place. My parents didn’t try to find me or talk to me, neither did Johnny.” 

“I’m so sorry, Love,” he said softly, reaching over to take my hand that was starting to pick at my cuticles. “That must have been. . . That’s so hard.”

“Yeah,” I said with a snort, trying not to focus on it too much and have a melt down before I got my food. “Johnny never reached out to see if what they said was true, just trusted them despite the bullshit they always pulled with me. I have no clue what I did to them, but my parents always treated me differently. It wasn’t outright abuse, but I know they never did like me, let alone love me. Saoirse always stood up for me, whenever they gave me a hard time, she’d call them out on it. Johnny didn’t get to see much of it because he was always busy and he always believed our parents. They had never done anything wrong to him, so how could they be so bad?”

“Have you tried reaching out to him? Try explaining anything to him?” John asked, rubbing my palm. 

“I did once, but he acted like I was. . . Like I was some druggie asking for help to get their next fix. It was maybe six years ago. I saw him in passing in Glasgow. He said I needed to get help and stop asking for money, before I even said anything. Johnny told me that I was an adult and couldn’t live off of mum and dad forever. Apparently our parents had been telling him that I was constantly asking for money for beer or drugs or whatever and he didn’t question it. We used to be really close, you know? Right before he turned 16 and tried to join the military, we’d always be around one another. Him and me and Saoirse. I don’t know what changed, but once he was gone, he wasn’t my brother anymore. Just a stranger who didn’t have time or want for me.” 

Just as it was getting too much to talk about, my food arrived. While I didn’t have that much of an appetite after explaining myself, even leaving a lot out, I still needed to eat. John didn’t ask any more questions as I ate, though I’m sure he had some. Finished with my food in just a few minutes, I let my meal settle before asking my own question. 

“So, how do you know Johnny?” I asked, knowing it was something that we would have to work with instead of around.

“He and I are on the same deployment team, specialized task force if you will,” John said. “We work together and see each other almost daily when we’re not deployed.”

“So this is something that he will find out about,” I said, nodding as anxiety made my stomach roll. 

“I know you two aren’t on good terms, but I can’t hide this from him. I also didn’t know how. . . Sensitive it was,” he said. “I can tell him myself or we can tell him together, but he has to know.”

“Which means my parents will find out as well,” I said, feeling like I was losing any sense of control I had over the situation. It was quickly going into a very upsetting and unwelcome direction. 

“Possibly,” John said. “I know that this is asking a lot from you, from carrying the baby to having to speak with family you cut out of your life, but I want to make this work. I want to be there for our child and you.”

“You’re right this is asking a lot,” I said, nodding as I stood up. “I can’t do this John. I’m not even sorry, but I am being asked to do so much, no I’m being told to do so much. I know you want to be in Bean’s life, but I am sacrificing everything and you get to just waltz in like the hero with the medical plan and the money and the car to take me places. I’m not-I can’t. No, it’s not happening,” I said, walking out. John cursed before following me out. 

“Love, just wait,” he said, grabbing my arm. 

“No! You wait!” I snarled as I turned on him, yanking my arm away. “I am expected to give up everything and sacrifice my sense of safety and self worth for you! Not Bean, but you! Because you work with my brother who I haven’t seen in years and because you want me to go to the nice medical practice and you want me to do this and that and I don’t want to! I don’t have to! So just leave me alone and forget I ever found you again. I’ve been on my own long enough that I can take care of myself and Bean without you.”

“You don’t have to though,” John said. He was frustrated, scrubbing his face as he looked around to see people staring at us because of my outburst. “Just-”

“No, no justs!” I cried. “I want to be left alone. Don’t call me, don’t follow me, don’t message me, nothing!”

He looked so heart broken, so desperate to help, but didn’t know how to handle being denied. Part of me wanted to just break down into tears and hug him, plead for him to never leave me, but I knew. . . I fucking knew that this was a pipe dream. Anything he and I could ever be or have was a fantasy. As soon as Johnny or my parents found out, they’d poison John against me. Help him take the Bean if they wanted to. 

I stared hard at him for a few moments before turning to walk away. I was miles from my place, but I didn’t care. The walk would help me get rid of these feelings and wants and pointless dreams. It should have been clear from the start that I wasn’t going to have a house with a yard and a bright red door with a shining white archway. No 2.5 kids with someone I loved and an old dog or cat we found while dating. I saw who I was at the clinic. The mum with two kids screaming, a third on the way while trying to handle it all on their own. That was my future.

Days passed and John kept his distance. I didn’t attempt to contact him and he did the same. After a while it felt normal again aside from getting sick at the slightest strong smell. I hadn’t escaped the dreaded ‘morning’ sickness after all. Work was hard, but I got through it, even if it meant leaving when the food began to be cooked and coming in early. Hitting 10 weeks felt like it took forever. The mood swings were still awful and my breasts were tender and swollen. I was getting a more noticeable bump too. It was easy to hide, but standing in front of a mirror in my underwear showed that there was indeed a Bean growing inside me. 

The worst part was my blood pressure. Somehow I had very low blood pressure despite the stress I was under. Low enough that if I was still for too long I would start to pass out. A quick clinic visit had me upping my salt intake and water. It wasn’t bad if I was at home, I could just sit in the floor till the feeling passed. I hadn’t experienced it outside of the house, yet. 

Mid week 11, I finally went to the store instead of eating out. I wasn’t feeling great, but I was doing what I could. Pushing the trolly up the bread aisle, I was looking for the one type of bread I knew I could stomach when fate decided that it was time for things to come to a head. 

As I was reaching for the bread, standing as tall as I could on my tippy toes, a hand reached up and grabbed it. 

“Here you go,” a familiar voice said. I turned to look at the person with wide eyes, both of us having a moment of disbelief. 

“Hey, Soap, don’t forget the-” 

Son of a fucking bitch.

“Oh,” John said as he saw me and Johnny staring at one another. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Johnny said, never taking his eyes off me. “Just helping this nice lady get some bread.” 

I never had a hair trigger to cry before, but the moment he said that instead of saying he knew me, it broke me. Bursting into tears, I couldn’t even leave. I was sobbing so hard. 

“Soap,” John said with a growl. I tried to brush his hands away, to try and get some space, but John wasn’t letting me leave. 

“Do you know her, Cap?” Johnny asked, sounding anything but pleased. 

“Easy, Love,” John said softly, pulling me close and stroking my hair. It shouldn’t have made me melt into him so easily, I should have tried harder to leave, but I was just so damn tired. 

“Price?” Johnny said, getting gruff. 

“I know who she is, Soap,” John said. “I know who you are to her. We can do this here or we can do this in private, Sergeant.” His tone left no argument or even a choice. The three of us left the store empty handed. John had me tucked under his arm the whole time we walked to a nearby house. It was just a few blocks from mine and when Johnny pulled out his keys to open the front door, I began to sob all over again. He had been so close this whole time and we never once ran into each other. It meant we either had very bad luck or he knew where I was the whole time and never said a thing. 

John offered soft words of comfort and reassurance as he guided me to a sofa. Sitting me down, he looked off to the side and told someone to bring him a cool wash cloth and to make tea. 

“I’m not fucking English, I don’t drink tea,” I croaked between sniffling sobs. 

“Yeah, but I am and so is the Bean,” John said, giving me a smile that made his cheeks round and his eyes crease. It was the same one he’d given me that first night we met. 

He had been sitting at the bar, nursing a scotch when I came up wild and loud, climbing onto a stool so I could kneel on it to be able to lean onto the bar so the bartender could hear my order. I glanced at him and flashed a smile and a wave. ‘Hi!’ I said, giving him my name. ‘Do you like tequila?’

‘Hi, I’m John and I do like tequila.’

‘It’s grand to meet you, John! Have a shot with me!’

“Who’s Bean?” A voice asked, bringing us out of our small daze. Looking up, there stood a man with dark eyes and a curious look. 

“Gaz,” John said, clearing his throat. “Not the time.” The man nodded, handing him the wash cloth that he turned to wipe my face. Letting him clean me up, I was able to calm down and at least stop crying. The headache that came after didn’t help at all. I couldn’t take any medication for it either, so I only had a bag of frozen peas that Gaz had grabbed at John’s request to help soothe the pounding behind my eyes. 

“Seems we’ve calmed down enough that we can talk,” John said as Johnny joined us, standing in the doorway, leaning against it with his arms crossed and his face sour. “There’s no good way to say this, so I might as well just say it. Johnny, your sister and I had a one night stand and now she’s pregnant.”

“Bullshit,” Johnny scoffed. 

“Sergeant,” John growled in a warning. 

“She’s not pregnant,” Johnny said, not backing down. “You two may have fucked, but she’s not pregnant. She’s just trying to get money out of you.”

“I went to a fucking doctor’s visit with her. She is pregnant and she’s been trying to avoid me and push away any help I offer her because you and your parents seem to have it out for her,” John snarled, standing up. “Now, I don’t know what your parents told you, but your sister has done everything in her power to make sure I’m not in my child’s life because you and them treat her like a plague rat. She has not once asked for a damn penny, let alone any large sum you’ve made up in your head.”

“You don’t even know if it’s yours!” Johnny cried out, pushing off from the doorframe. 

“I’m the only one she’s been with, you fucking muppet! You’d know that if you’d talk to her like a decent person, let alone a decent brother!” John snapped, getting in his face. “I have been trying to do everything I can to make sure I have a relationship with my child, at least, because it is impossible to get close to her after everything you lot put her through! I gave you the benefit of the doubt even. That you were just fed lies so much that nothing else made sense! No, this is willful ignorance now and I won’t stand for it. Your sister has been alone needlessly for years. Be a fucking man and own up to your mistakes.”

The room was deathly quiet as the two men stood there, seething as they stared each other down. 

“You know shit ain’t been addin’ up, Johnny,” a low, gruff voice said. A man with a skull balaclava stood off to the side as he watched everything. Had he been there the whole time? “It hasn’t been for a long time.” Johnny turned away from John to look at the man then to me. His snarl faded as he kept our gazes locked before walking away. “I got him, you take care of yours, Price,” the man said, calmly walking after my brother. John nodded, letting out a breath he’d been holding. 

“I. . . I’m sorry, Love,” he said softly, taking a seat next to me, his head hanging as he stared at his hands. “I know you didn’t want any of this and I’ll take you home if you want me to.”

“John,” I said, reaching over and taking his calloused hand in mine. “Thank you.” He looked from our hands to my face, his brows relaxing a bit from the worried scrunch they’d been stuck in.

“You’re welcome,” he said softly, leaning in to kiss my cheek. 

“I think maybe we should try things differently,” I said, bumping his head with mine. 

“Yeah?” He hummed, pulling me close to rest against his chest. 

“Dating. We should date. Start there and work our way up,” I said, nuzzling against his chest. He was wearing a soft cable knit sweater and I wanted to climb inside it with him. 

“I think that’s a good idea,” he said, his voice rumbling deep in his chest as he put both arms around me. 

“I also need the insurance papers again. . . I lost them,” I said, tucking my head under his, happy in the warm and safe spot I’d made. 

“Of course,” John said, chuckling. 

“Also. . . That was really hot, you standing up for me. I don’t think I’d ever been so turned on before,” I said, hiding my smirk.

“Brat,” he snorted. “Do you want to go home?”

“Can you come with me and stay?” I asked, pulling away to look up at him.

“Wild dogs couldn’t keep me away,” John smiled, leaning down to kiss me. 

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Taglist: @birdstoprey @sebbytheraccoon @pricescigar @alwaysshallow

[sicksucculentz]

Regretavator headcanons: Bive

Don't look at me like that, I love this character

There are moments when she truly is scary to other people. Sometimes her fits of angry deranged delusional ranting can reach this fevered rampage that quickly becomes scary. She's never hurt anyone during these but there's been sometimes when folks have just left or pressed against the wall in a bit of fear. It's highly unlikely she would hurt someone but it's still scary. She's only lost her shit in the elevator about 4 different times and Split was present for one of them. It didn't phase her because she knows Bive. The only thing Bive has ever done to her is hug her a little too tight out of stress.

She smells. Holy shit she smells! she smells of just general BO and unwashed hair if not musty.

She doesn't sleep often and when she does it's only for about 3 or 4 or so hours. It's typically 3 or so times a week from about 4am to 6am or 7am when her body reaches her limit. Sadly due to her frequent sleep deprivation she hears things. They are just little things like a radio somewhere crackling and muffled speaking from a radio, something lightly skittering around in the walls, A soft quiet continuing beeping noise like an alarm clock she doesn't own, and pages from a book flipping and shuffling.

Split has been able to get her to sleep for longer hours in the past. Her secrete is to convince Bive to take a couple of strong CBD drops. It really helps settle her down, quiet her mind, and help her get to sleep sense in a normal state Bive's mind is constantly racing. It's pretty normal for Bive to completely pass out on the sofa with Split while watching murder mystery shows or game shows. Split often checks on Bive every hour or so because Bive doesn't move in her sleep. Her breathing is shallow and she already smells like a dead body as is.

Bive is in love with Split, Bive will often do what Split says with such little convincing. Split knows this and she loves Bive to but they are not in a relationship. Bive herself doesn't really understand WHY they need to label their closeness with a relationship and Split is just the type of 'go with the flow' type of gal, she's just happy to be around Bive.

Bive eats 2 meals with small snacks in between. She lives in constant stress so her stomach is always in knots or aches. Her appetite is almost gone at this point so she gets a little food in here and there when the hunger starts to make her dizzy and her head hurt. This doesn't mean she's small and skinny ether. I see this design with a lot of artists and I completely agree with it, she's husky. Tall, thicker, and bulky, an appearance much like that of a bear and she knows her own strength and size.

She does have some small abilities that she doesn't tell anyone about. She WANTS it to remain hidden so she can just pull something from her metaphorical back pocket. She does have retractable claws much like a cat and these claws are quite sharp. She's amazingly strong! and can get aggressive enough to rip a car door off a car with enough pulling and twisting. She has a very mild hypnotic ability, it's pretty weak though. Her moulth has the ability to open up wide like packman. There are chromatophore cells all along the inside of her mouth. These cells all have different timings for when they change colors. It appears as if there are thick stripes of rapidly color changing sections inside her mouth. There are all number if colors of the rainbow that flash from color to color. This has an odd weak hypnotic effect that can result in dissociation at most. It causes the person to freeze up and just stare, trapping them in place until someone shakes them or she stops flashing those cells. She can do this at will so it isn't constantly going any time her mouth opens, she has to choose to do this. She almost never uses this ability but she has had to do it once before in front of Pest. Pest tried to get her to do it to folks in the elevator so he could steal from them for like a month. She refused of course and even got frustrated enough to swat at Pest to get him to go away. Didn't hurt of course, just a physical way to get her point across. She does have a pretty nasty bite and that bite can become infected pretty fast. Human bites also tend to become infected pretty easily and it's the same for her even if she may not be human. Her sense of smell is amazing, much like a bear she can sniff things out from pretty darn far away. She does also hide small pocket knives or letter openers in her trench coat just in case. She doesn't have a lot but she'll use what ever works to survive. She's also a dirty fighter. This just means she's an unfair opponent. She goes for the face, neck, liver shots, groin shots, hair pulling, sand or dirt in the eyes, and even uses over wealming tactics. She just keeps swinging and swinging not giving her opponent a chance to recover. She can break someone's arms or ribs if she wanted to just by over the knee snapping or pushing them to the ground and throwing all her weight on top.

All her fur on her body raises when she's in the presence of Unpleasant. She just puffs up and stares Unpleasant down. If she can she wont even get on the elevator if she sees Unpleasant on that elevator. Unpleasant doesn't scare her she just hates them.

She has tiny little ears that are hidden in her mess of hair. They are pretty gosh darn small and resemble a bit like an elf's ear. They can move up and down, side to side, around, whatever. Her eyes are also very small. She has tiny beady little eyes and she can't see jack squat without her glasses. Everything is super super blurry without her glasses to the point she couldn't even navigate her own apartment without her glasses.

Her teeth reach pretty far back in her mouth and she even has all her wisdom teeth. Her jaw can handle keeping them and she only has some issues stemming from them about 3 times a year or so.

She's bigger than Split but of course and again Split is not scared of her because she's never ever hurt Split and she never ever would, she even tried to make herself seem smaller and weaker when interacting with Split. Split likes watching her stand at her full height, she likes watching Bive break things or fight.

Bive is an omnivore while Split is more of a herbivore. Bive does love fruit and funny enough bananas are her favorite fruit! she also loves loves loves sautéed zucchini and soft chicken. She's not much of a fan of heavy meats like beef or pork, ham or bacon is too salty for her. Unrelated but she finds fish has too many little bones and the fish taste just doesn't appeal to her regardless of what kind of fish she's eating. She does enjoy crab, lobster, and shrimp. She has the ability to just crack open the shells with her teeth and has a lot of fun doing it. Clams and muscles are gross to her, just slimey and bleugh. Squid and octopus is fine, lost of fun to chew on.

She sleeps in a small closet. It's completely by choice but there is a cot in a closet in a closet in her bedroom(converted to an office). She sleeps with her back to the wall and facing the closed closed door. The clothes hanging inside the closet also help conceal her and make her feel a little more safe/hidden.

She does have perpetually itchy spots like her back, head, under chin, and tummy. It might be because she has dandruff in those spots making those spots itchy. Of course the itchy spot on her tummy has never been itched by anyone but herself and Split.

[same-pic-of-the-sun-everyday]

Hello.

Hello.

Could anyone please listen?

Could someone please hear?

I'm looking for help

Someone is missing

Someone so close

I want them back

And I think you could help

I'm looking for myself

Please join the search

Call this number

If you happen to see them

I'm looking for myself

They've been gone so long

I don't think they're quite safe

I'm looking for myself

I've almost lost hope

Just take a moment

Could you look for this face?

I wonder where they are

Lost in a crowd?

Fallen somewhere deep, calling for help?

I don't where they are

And now I'm quite scared

I'm looking for myself

Could you please lend me a hand?

i have read this five times

I want to cry

this

you

holy shit, anon /pos

[horsegirlalexkralie]

Damn now I got more college slut Tim/big Dick Alex on the brain 👀

The first time they fuck, Tim is left completely overwhelmed and overstimulated. Alex pushes into Tim and abt halfway in, Tim is like "holy shit are you in me yet jfc" and Alex is just absolutely cocky abt it.

He purposely drags it out, taking extra time with Tim just to get his toes curled and get him whining under him. He makes it his goal to make Tim cum as many times as he can in that one night so he can remember, while they're on set and Tim's being a little shit, that we was able to break him down into a moaning, whining, desperate mess.

And at first, Tim is cocky and telling him 'cmon big boy fuck me already yk you wanna' but the second Alex is in him, hes coming apart. He can't keep being cocky for long, really

god . tim walking around like :3 u wanna kiss me so bad it makes u look fucking stupid :33 all day until alex gets him alone and he cant get a sentence out right bc every time he starts talking shit alex thrusts into him and fuck seriously alex youre such an assh- (what? you wanna speak up? you sound like a whore)

and tims never been especially loud for anyone else but somewhere between the third time he cums on alexs dick and when they finish something snaps in him and he just cant fucking help but whimper and squirm whenever alex touches him, moaning into his mouth when they kiss, covering his mouth when alex goes down on him bc its so fucking embarrassing to be this noisy how do people live with themselves alex keeps saying shit abt it and tim feels like hes fucking dissolving he cant think straight he cant think abt anything

he crashes at alexs place bc he can barely walk and alex is like whoopsie daisy maybe i went overboard haha :) anyways did you happen to keep count? like do we have a final number? and tim lifts his head up all bleary eyed and sweaty covered in bruises w his hair fucking everywhere and tells him he has no idea bc (alex cant physically get hard again so why the fuck is he) he lost track after seven.

jay wont stop asking tim at rehearsal the next day who fucked his neck up (give me a gender at least- come on im literally working with everyone on campus who likes guys except for me and, like, alex.) while brian is quietly observing that alex has the tiniest shadow of a bruise on his shoulder, half-hidden by the collar of his shirt, like someone bit him there recently. or something.

[of-stars-and-pens]

Pairing: Johnny Depp and Reader

Fandom: RPF

Inspiration/Request: Random blurb I found on a list that I’ve since misplaced… And Johnny’s win in court!

Warnings: 

A/N: Holy shit. I started this fic forever and a day ago, but here we goooo~

“I remember the first time we met.”

“I wish you didn’t,” you teased back. “My hair was a mess.” You turned to look at him, catching him staring for the briefest moment.

Johnny looked away, shaking his head with closed eyes and a smile only Johnny could have. There was a gentle chuckle before his gaze returned to you.

“I thought you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen,” Johnny said sweetly, reaching over and taking your hand in his. 

He looked at the growing number of people in your area and frowned while you laughed, covering your mouth.

The movie itself hadn’t started yet, thankfully, but more and more people were taking their seats for the premiere and the sheer amount of people was starting to feel uncomfortable for both of you. Still. It was a mutual friend’s movie you were here to watch and there would certainly be discussions at the afterparty and maybe the after-after party if the two of you were up for that. You weren’t used to events like this and you lacked the stamina needed to be out partying until the sun rose. Johnny didn’t seem to mind, which felt like a blessing considering you were new to this world.

“You looked like you’d stepped out of a time machine or something. With your pulled back and styled that way, and your dress? I was convinced a fucking goddess was gracing us with her presence. Aphrodite herself had stepped down from Mt. Olympus to mingle with us mortals.”

“That explains why you were looking at me so much. I thought I’d done something to piss you off or something,” you admitted softly.

Johnny chuckled and pulled away, shifting his posture in the chair. “No, Darling. That’s not what was happening–I was trying to figure out how to talk to you.”

You looked at him, watching him closely as you rubbed your belly.

He still held your hand but he was leaning away from you, his elbow propped up on the arm rest, his hand stroking his chin as he looked at the empty screen in front of you. There was something on his mind, and you couldn’t get a good read on him or his thoughts. 

You frowned when he looked at you: his eyebrows were raised as he looked at you with interest, as if waiting for you to say something. Adjusting so he was leaning towards you now, his ear aimed at you to hear you better as the room started getting louder. His elbow and hand stayed where they had been despite his chin no longer being there.

You leaned over a little to be closer to him as you spoke, hoping he’d hear you. 

“What’s on your mind?” You asked, looking at him concerned. “You look lost in your own little world. Are you okay, or do we need to go somewhere so you can get grounded?” 

“I’m fine,” he assured with a smile as he sat up and looked at you. “I was just thinking.”

“About?” 

“You. The night we met. How shy you were when Janice introduced us.” 

His smile didn’t convince you that that was really what he had been thinking of, but you weren’t going to push it here. You weren’t worrying about it escalating into a fight or anything like that–just the opposite. You didn’t want him to get emotional over something in public. He was a very private person, all things considered, and you respected that. 

You smiled, and he took that as an invitation to continue. He leaned closer to you again, and you leaned your head over so your ear was closer to his lips.

“I was wondering what it would take to get you to open up, break that shyness.” He chuckled. “And then she told me about your poster, and–”

“I still haven’t forgiven her for that,” you interrupted, smiling to yourself as he laughed.

His gaze met yours as you turned towards him. Even as his laughter stopped, the joy in his eyes made your chest feel warm in the best way. 

You loved this man, and knowing he loved you too was unimaginable. You wouldn’t believe this was even a possibility if it wasn’t for the fact you’d woken up to breakfast in bed. Your favorite too–made by Johnny. This was a dream you had once, but waking up every morning to it being your reality? Incredible.

And he was so painfully kind to you; knowing the pain he’d experienced in the past broke your heart. The two of you had been through so much that all you wanted was to make the other happy. The doting took so many shapes–from him getting a small tattoo to match one you had already gotten to you playing hostess to his guests: making sure that they had full glasses and full bellies. The love the two of you shared was unrivaled, and it warmed those around you. Even his children liked you, something you never expected but were so incredibly thankful for. Days out shopping with Lily-Rose were something you cherished.

There were times he would ask you to pose for his paintings, or ask you to listen to the music he’d been writing. 

He made you feel safe. Whenever there was a bump in the night, he would investigate.

You were his muse, and he was your home, and that was all that mattered.

[hexxgirlthorn]

task #003: absence

fuck you.

i'm writing this instead of a new song for the band and i bet you fucking love that. i bet you're so happy that my pen is taking a break from scorching your ass in my music. i bet you love that i burn you and what we had over and over and over again with the songs i write. knowing you, you actually have the nerve to brag that there are songs out there written about you. you've always loved being the villain in my story. the one that stabbed lilith in the back.

when i was in rehab i was told this was a way to really get my frustration off my chest--a letter. i didn't want to write to you then. i don't really want to write to you now. but i can't seem to get out of this long spell of writers block without attempting so here i am. you'll never get this because i can't even try to send it to you if i wanted to, and honestly? good. fuck you. you never deserved my words. you still don't. every sentence, every word, is wasted on you and i can't seem to stop myself from writing this anyways. i hear your laughter, your anger, your joy, sadness, desperation, moans, and disgust as i write this. it's like i'm in your shitty ass apartment all over again, snorting whatever we could get our hands on while i'm ignoring calls from the girls. fucking and fighting and tearing each other down until you somehow gain the upper hand, i'm crying, and then in your arms yet again. the cycle just kept repeating, huh? you loved that. you loved building me up and breaking me down so many times that i lost who i was for a while. you loved the fact that you stranded me in your storm with no way out.

i'm fucking ruined because of you, but you already know that. you chanted it before, you sang how good it felt to fuck me up. the most fucked up part? i let it happen and i fucking loved it. every bruise, every emotional scar....i used to miss that shit. but you know what i missed the most? the drugs. the sex. the alcohol. the holy trinity of our relationship. i was clean before you. i had hardly drank before you. now i can't seem to cope with shit without having you follow me around still. i bled for you so much that now my blood is a part of you. i'll admit, the songs were fucking bangers. fucking batshit and some even fan favorites. i hate that. i hate that i have to play a song that i hate because they love it and they love you! the crowds fucking love you! no matter how fucked things got, no matter how honest i am in my music....they still fucking love you. you got your wish, you're immortal baby. i got scars on my body to prove it.

i used to love you. i think. i think you were the only thing i ever knew as love and that you were what made me think i could fall in love. now i know that love is just...not for me. you were my first love song. you were my only love song. how fucked is that? you fucking ruined my life. no matter where i go (which is fucking nowhere now) and no matter who i'm with...i have to be reminded that you fucking are still alive somewhere fucking some other young girl up who probably just wanted to share her music and her voice with the world too. someone who heard your scratchy ass voice at some cafe and got your number because you gave them that stupid drunk smile that could fucking ruin just about anyone. i have to remember that the only way i'm ever going to quit you is to start fucking over. i started over so many times and it always gets me back here. sneaking drinks, snorting a line or two when no one is around to get the creative juices flowing like you would say. losing my fucking mind because i can't seem to find my way back to myself. i really fucking hate you.

fuck you. this didn't make me feel better. this only reminded me that i am a product of you. that i am a bitch, i am closed off, and i will never connect with anyone outside of my sisters because of you. fuck you.

this is the last time i ever write about you.

-- sally

[orpheusilver]

next time you get bored u should answer this ask to talk about your Eric and Morbius ^_^ i love Blade so much so i’m interested in what you have planned so far

hiiiiiiiiiii im procrastinating lol. anyway so you know how this is a hall of mirrors ass story and everybody parallels everybody? yea

sooo eric is the biggest and clearest foil to morgan bc they have.. so much in common. not quite a vampire. trying to atone for times they lost control and killed human people. badass vamp-killing machines. many such cases but the Differences are the funky bit bc on one hand morgan had a like. half-decent upbringing with parents and a house and everything, hes far from stable but the idea of emotional vulnerability isnt totally alien to him. Eric was a very lonely child in a terrible life-threatening situation who grew up into a very lonely adult in a slightly less terrible life-threatening situation.

to be clear eric does have people in his life! its just that theres only 2 of them. he got adopted by his cool butch biker mom whistler as a young teen and theyve been doing the vampire slaying thing ever since, and a few years ago they picked up a hematologist called karen jensen who fell into the "older sister" role. (okay yes like 80% of the blade-related plot was pulled straight from Blade (1998) but ignore that im doing some funky shit with it. okay.) she says shes an uninvolved civilian who provides medical aid since she owes eric a life debt, but this is a lie. shes In the shenanigans.

so like he does have his gay little found family but theres some shit they just dont Get yknow. so then once he does start trusting morgan they get. Very close . Very quickly. hes experiencing previously unknown types of human connection, including being gay in practice and not just in theory! and sure hes kinda avoidant and struggles to open up and express his feelings or establish boundaries but thats ok bc morgan is so anxious about rejection and abandonment that hes very willing to put in tons of work with being vulnerable! theyre meeting somewhere in the middle, they think! morgans only a little bit clingy and always suuuuper apologetic when he crosses those unclear boundaries! surely this is a healthy dynamic that wont collapse catastrophically due to communication problems!

anyway primary foil number 2: peter-man. as in superhero role model / the cooler super-powered role model. like pete always sees morbius as someone who needs to be helped and guided and saved and supported and first and foremost as his Responsibility. eric, at least at first, sees him as a Fucking Threat. to be understood and/or neutralized. and morgan really appreciates that! then eric learns to trust and respect him and they begin this totally-not-dysfunctional partnership of equals, its kinda cute if you ignore that its blatantly barreling towards destruction <3

edit i completely forgot the point of that last paragraph. eric respecting morgan like an equal makes him realize that actually, spider-guy is being kind of a cunt about this and why is he trying to prove himself to that loser anyway hes got a cool goth boyfriend now. he actually tries to earn peters respect by making him recognize him as dangerous which BACKFIRES BADLY lmao bc peter is trying to control morbius' sense of Hero Ethics just as much as hes trying to control who he punches and when, so seeing morgan get scary makes him double down on the "holy shit dont get evil" stuff. which also backfires badly. these dudes are all fucking trainwrecks

[stalkedbytrains]

Beneath the Electric Sky: Chain One Sequence Three: The Threatening Past

It took Arc almost three hours to bury the information that Io would need to exploit to get in the door.

While he was doing that under Seth's watchful eye, Io and I were going over the truck.

"Why are we doing this?" I asked.

"The number of times I've lost a good con because of the small details taught me to be careful. Especially with these people, if they are as scary and paranoid as you seem to suggest that they are. I don't want them to find some manifest or something that tells them this truck is stolen or the items are actually supposed to go somewhere else," Io said. "See some enterprising employee wrote on this box that this was to be delivered to... Edge Wares? Never heard of them, but if the security is as thorough as you think, they'd have me shot."

I couldn't help but groan, annoyed.

"We're going to have to unload this box."

Of course it was a box sandwiched in the very back which meant that we'd have to move everything in front of it to get to it. I groaned louder.

As we moved boxes Io asked. "So how did you get involved in this bullshit?"

"After I cleaned up everything," I said with a significant pause. Io knew what I meant. "And I joined the military, I went through my basic training, got deployed to Contested Mongolia."

"Ooh, I've heard stories."

"It was both worse than you've heard and not as bad at the same time. But then I had the right aptitude and a bunch of other shit, so I was selected for a secret program to get some beyond top secret upgrades."

"And I assumed it worked?"

I nodded.

"Can you tell me what they did?"

"No. But I can say that you and me are essentially opposites."

"Opposites?"

"There's a reason we needed you for the job," I explained cryptically. Io would get it eventually. He was smart.

"So are Seth and Arc the same as you?" he asked after a few moments of silence.

"No. They wish so badly they can have what I have. But there's a whole series of bullshit to get through to get what I have."

"Oh is this a Captain America thing? Are you the only super solider that they made before getting blown up?"

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help but laugh. "No. They know exactly how it works, but the doctor is dead. Not from Nazi assassins, he defected and I killed him for it. And I'm not the only one, there's more of me. It's just that they're half-lives were much shorter than mine."

"Ah so more Dead Nine. They're all dead?"

It took me a minute to respond. "As far as I know, yes. All of them but me died within six years of the procedure."

"Are you ok?"

"Io. I really don't know how to answer that. I left six years behind a long time ago. So I might drop dead at any moment."

What happened next would have resulted in me breaking several bones for anyone else. But Io came over and offered me a hug. A tight one. A level of physical contact that I hadn't experienced in a very long time.

There was a bubbling of emotions that I didn't know what to deal with.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, any time. I'm glad you're back and alive Synthia. I've missed you a little. No one else understands my weird love of all the old sci-fi stuff and my references."

I laughed as Io finally let me go.

"We'll have to go out and grab some drinks after this. Maybe have you help me steal that stuff from Filmore."

"If they let me off the leash," I grumbled. "I have a very very short one so me operating on my own is a rare prospect."

Io stopped moving boxes, which was annoying, but I could tell that he was putting together a bunch of things.

"Oh... Oh fuck," he said. "You're not really working with them, you're a part of it. You're the illegal technology they seize."

I sighed. "Yeah."

"Oh that means that you must be... like what? 70%... No... you said that we were opposites and that's why you needed me for the job. Holy fuck. Synthia. Please tell me that I'm mistaken. You can be 90%."

"It's actually higher than that but yeah. I told you that my name was funny."

"Fucking hell Synthia."

"Parts of it weren't necessarily my choice. But I agreed to it because I did get some stuff I wanted out of it. I just didn't know I was going to be stuck here with their controlling claws stuck so deep inside me."

Io took a deep breath and shook his head a few times. "That sucks. Really. I wish I could help more than just doing this job for you."

"There's nothing for you to do, so it's best if we just do this one and call it a day."

"Yeah. Yeah... Well I'm going to enjoy it while we've got it."

Just before we finished up with the repacking the boxes Seth came down to the garage.

"Synthia, Arc is ready to go. You should get your equipment. Io stay here, I have some questions for you," he said in a tone that made it clear it was an order. But he didn't actually say it was an order so the control collars didn't activate.

Gave a little salute to Io as I walked away, only getting as far as around the corner before stopping. I wanted to listen in.

I trusted Io, but there were techniques for getting information that I didn't know if Io would be aware of or could survive.

Seth took his time to get to the point, there was a significant amount of silence before I heard.

"So you knew Synthia before all of this. Fascinating stuff. You have any funny stories or anything we can use to gently tease her?"

"You know," Io started, "there is one story that I used to love ribbing her with way before. We met at the same orphanage in San Francisco. The first time I ever saw her she didn't want to leave the playground and stop playing so she just took a dump right in the middle of the sandbox."

All of it was lies. We didn't meet in an orphanage. As far as I know we were never in San Francisco at the same time.

I couldn't see them, so I had no idea what Seth was doing.

"You're clever," I heard him say. "You think you can lie to me and because I don't know a lot of her past that you can get away with whatever."

"And you're not," I heard Io counter. "I finally figured you out. Arc too but he seems like a weasel so his only threat is who he can run to so he can tattle. You want, desperately, what Synthia has. And you're willing to bite, gnaw, and control anyone and anything to try and get at it. But you're up against the most stubborn woman I have ever met. Even as a little girl Synthia was willing to destroy people like you to protect herself and her friends. If you think I'll betray that so that you can get a leg up in your penny ante influence games you've got another thing coming. Besides I know what Synthia does to people who betray her."

"I see," Seth said after a moment of silence. "Tracing the lives of people with no records, like Synthia, is very difficult. But the more ties we have, the more things we can tie her too the more we complete the picture. And now we have you. We will tie you to her and use that to sink you both."

Io laughed, a bit too loud to be authentic. "Please. You're not the first fed to threaten me. I'm a thief and a conman. I know the game. There's only so much you can do to me, legally or illegally. And I'm pretty careful. I scrub my tracks every few years. So you can probably go back four or five years. But after that you're going to hit a brick wall. So good luck. Let me know if you want to torture me. I've never done that so I'm curious as to how I'll hold up. But I'm not selling out my friend. A concept that you clearly don't understand."

"Perhaps we will have more luck with Lorelei."

"Oh, you found them already?" Io asked with fake interest. "I'm impressed. With only a first name and nothing else to go on, that's quite a feat."

"You know, you are an excellent liar. It will not save you though."

"Seth, Seth. Remember when I said you're not clever? You're not a smart man, because you shouldn't be threatening me before the job. Remember, if I don't do this, you lose everything. If I screw up, you could be trapped in the EM fields, with all of your cybernetics shutting down and failing, which I believe will kill you. Is this the best plan?"

There was another stretch of silence. "Synthia," Seth called out loudly. "I thought I ordered you to leave and get ready."

This was a direct order and I had to follow it. Cursing I left and went to go prepare for the job.

my kofi where i share early chapters

[stuffing-seattle]

Kelly’s First Date Part 3:

Kelly swallowed hard and tried to push the full feeling in her tummy to the side. All she had to do was eat one of each of the dishes, Derek would be happy, and she could go home and go into a food coma for a week.

With that thought to fuel her forward, she began her daunting task. She tried her best to respond to what Derek was talking about, but much of her focus had to be centered on wolfing down food. She started with a steak. Halfway through the steak she felt the same and thought that just maybe she could do this. Once she had polished it off however, that full feeling was right back again.

It was not painful yet, but her belly was clearly begging her stop. But she couldn’t. She had a mission and it would be seen through. She went on with two of the boiled eggs. Soon enough they disappeared into her ever expanding belly. Then she had a helping of mashed potatoes. Finally a little wine to wash it all down. There. Done.

Kelly breathed a sigh that was half relief and half to relieve some of the pressure in her gut. She had never eaten this much before and was having to take labored breaths. She sat back on the palms of her hands and heard her overworked blouse creak in response. The supple skin beneath was overflowing and peaking in between the buttons which were holding on for dear life. Kelly looked like she had swallowed a soccer ball and looked briefly in awe at the size she had grown to.

This was short-lived though, as a painful grumble shot across her mid section. She moaned softly and hoped Derek didn’t hear. “Still hungry huh?” He asked her. “I’m actually pretty full thanks.” She replied. “Ah no need to be modest.” Said Derek. “Don’t worry I’m the same way, I eat like a black hole. Two more of those steaks are yours and so are the rest of the eggs. Bulking life am I right?”

Kelly smiled weakly. *burp* “O-of course. *urp* Right.” Kelly tried in vain to stifled the burps that were bubbling up in her gut. How was she going to pull this off? What was an uncomfortable tightness in her belly was now full blown pain. Could she even physically eat more? Maybe. But the pain was stopping her. She had an idea. All she needed to do was ignore the pain just for a bit.

She took one last deep breath, and completely turned her brain off. She thought of nothing other than forcing food down her throat. One steak went down, then the second. One egg, then two, then three, and she lost count somewhere around number six. All of this was punctuated by gulping down wine after each bite.

Eventually, there was no more food to grab. It had all disappeared into her now-massive belly. She sat back on the heels of her hands once again. This time though, her blouse finally gave up. The bottom three buttons flew off, one after the other, *ping, ping, ping* stopping at the one just below her breasts. The button on her blue jeans quickly followed *snap*.

Finally, her orb of a belly was on full display to them both. It surged forward, no longer restrained, and obscured about a fourth of her lap. Her gut was the size of a basketball. And it could was audibly churning and gurgling. Occasionally one of the gurgles would be accompanied by her whole belly quivering slightly as it attempted to wrestle with the bowling ball in her belly.

Derek’s eyes were as big as saucers. “Holy shit, you really were full, weren’t you?” An almighty

BEEEEELLLLLLCCCCCHHHHH!!!!

Was all Kelly could muster. She fell back onto the couch, unable to even sit up at this point. Her head lolled over to the wine bottle, which was empty at this point. *ORP* *BURRRP* “Ah *hic* fuck. How much of that did I drink?”

“I only had one glass.” Said Derek in a concerned tone. Kelly let her head fall back and moaned in a mixture of pain, pleasure, and exhaustion. “Do you, uh, need anything?” Derek asked trepidatiously. Kelly’a head was swimming, and she couldn’t tell if she was drunk off the wine or from the massive feast she had shoved in her gut.

“Rub my belly.” She mumbled. “Whoa, what really?” Derek stammered, flustered. “Yes *urp* please just be gentle.” He reached over and ran his hands over the taut sphere that was her belly. Kelly moaned again. He gave a very soft squeeze. Immediately, Kelly felt her food rush up to the back of her throat. “Gentle!” She admonished. Derek obeyed and went back to lightly caressing the overstretched skin on her mid section.

Kelly laid back and closed her eyes. Every tiny disturbance of Derek’s hands forced a burp from her overinflated gut. She just focused on the feelings she was having. Her belly felt warm, and full, and tight, as if she was carrying new life in her overpacked belly. The burps that escaped her lips relieved a small amount of pressure each time, the overall taboo of just releasing her gas was embarrassing, but she could do nothing to stop it, and she reveled in that lack of control. Every brush of Derek’s skin on hers was like a lightening bolt, and with each bolt a tingly storm of heat was brewing in her belly and between her legs. She was losing herself to the pleasure of the moment. Her gut gurgled and roared and shook and trembled as Derek tried in vain to tame it.

With all of these feelings intermingling, the storm in her belly grew hotter and more intense. Involuntarily, she began panting. Then moaning. Before either one of them knew what was happening, a familiar bolt of electricity ran through Kelly’s significantly larger body, causing her toes to curl, and her fingernails to embed themselves in the fabric of the couch. When the wave of pleasure subsided, Kelly thought to herself, *Did I just cum?* And that was the last thought Kelly could muster before falling into a food coma.

[iamvegorott]

Ink Month 2023 Day 24

Haunted

“How many ghosts do you think we’ll see?” Chase asked, looking up at the open window to the house he and Bing were going to stay the night and investigate. 

“Three,” Bing said matter-of-factly. 

“What makes you guess that?” Chase asked, leaning his back to the wall, lacing his fingers together, and holding his hands down like a basket. 

“Feeling in the gut.” Bing patted his stomach before placing a foot on Chase’s hands. 

“My gut says four,” Chase grunted the number as he hoisted Bing to the window. 

“You’re only saying that to one-up me.” Bing huffed, pushing the window open more, and crawled through. 

“I always one-up you.” Chase laughed before Bing was gone. He could hear Bing using a mocking tone until he unlocked and opened the front door.

“Don’t come crying to me when you get scared shitless.” Bing’s tone showed he was teasing as he leaned an arm against the door frame.

“Same to you.” Chase teased back, ducking under Bing’s arm and entering the house. “Damn, dude, for an old abandoned place, it actually doesn’t too horrible.” He commented as he looked around. Everything had a layer of dust to it. Some items had an age-based staining, and you could taste how stuffy it was. “Give it a good clean and open the other windows. It could be good as new and livable.” 

“I ain’t living somewhere where ghosts can slap my ass. You can move here without me.” Bing chuckled. Chase grinned, and as soon as Bing looked away, he raised his hand and slapped his butt. “The fuck~?” 

“Had to prove to the ghosts that only I get to slap that ass.” Chase had a playful puff to his chest.

“Oh? We’re proving things to the ghosts?” Bing had an almost evil glint in his eyes as he placed a hand on Chase’s chest and guided him to press his back against a wall. 

“Looks like they’re getting a show, too.” Chase didn’t give Bing time to react before he yanked him down into a kiss. Bing hummed against Chase’s lips, hands going to his hips and pulling them away from the wall a bit, just enough for a hand-sized gap. 

“My turn to prove something,” Bing said as his warning and then smacked Chase’s butt, the sharp sound echoing slightly in the room. 

“Ow!” Chase yelped. “Dude!” 

“You did it first.” Bing couldn’t help from breaking out into a laugh. 

“You did it harder,” Chase grumbled, rubbing his butt with both hands. “You and your robot hands.”

“Want me to kiss it better?” Bing offered.

“You’re going to kiss my ass?” Chase chuckled.

“Only if you ask.” Bing had a hint of a purr to his voice and moved Chase back against the wall.

“Tempting. But you can kiss something else first.” Chase lifted a hand and tapped a finger to his lips. 

“I can manage that.” Bing leaned in and kissed Chase. The two got lost in their kiss, hands wrapping around each other and pressing their bodies as close as physically possible. 

CRACK

“Holy shit!” Chase shouted from the sudden, loud noise that came above them. 

“Ghost!” Bing cried out. 

“I think it was just-” Chase didn’t get to finish before Bing picked him up and ran out of the house. He didn’t bother resisting or saying anything else and just laughed as he got carried away. 

[taurus-caeli]

The Exciting Chronicles of The Shapeshifter & The Eccentric Gentleman

I / II / III / IV (You're here) / V

My patience is waning

Is this entertaining?

Our patience is waning

Is this entertaining?

(Bones, Imagine Dragons)

Words: 2.4k

Number One opens the door and quietly steps inside; behind me, it shuts with a soft click. There’s grass beneath his shoes.

Scratch that, there’s grass everywhere. 

Observing his surroundings, it looks like there’s a miniature forest here. Grass seems to have grown from underneath the floorboards. Seedlings are sprouting not just from the floor but the walls as well and the sweet scent of flowers permeates the air (it’s almost nauseating). Birdsong can be heard from somewhere further in.

Directly in front of him is some kind of object that used to be a bed; now it’s more like a nest made from grass. Further beyond that is a hallway that goes right where the birdsong is coming from. Also, there’s an open balcony with a view a couple feet from the ‘nest’.

Suddenly, he felt out of place, like a snake slithering through the garden of some nobles’ garden. The analogy is almost appropriate because it makes him grin. Walking towards the hallway, he turns and finds a…creature hunched over in front of a table of food.

This…mass of grass held up by Celestia-knows-what and bones is staring at…a hot dog and some bento. It’s almost funny. Number One leaned against the wall, put on the most charming grin he could and dropped his perception filter. Just as they reach down to pick it up, he chooses that moment to make himself known.

“Golly! That sure does look tasty!” he said cheerfully. They make a choking noise. Their meal is swiftly forgotten in favor of finding out who said that, aka me.

All five eyes are on me now. Showtime.

“Greetings my delightfully eldritch fellow! I come in peace!” They open their mouth and his ears are assaulted with a freakin’ heavenly choir.

“¿noʎ ǝɹɐ ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ oɥM” Their voice sounds both male and female combined and angelic and demonic. Delightful.

He bowed his head in respect. “My apologies my good man-er, woman…beast? Creator. I’ll go with that. My apologies to my good creator, but I’m afraid I don’t understand you. A moment, if you will allow.”

And then he snapped his fingers. There’s a small change in the air, but only those such as myself and them could feel it. Eldy sniffs the air. “What did you-holy shit I can talk normally again!”

“Yes! Call me Number One. I’d like to discuss something much bigger than the both of us. A grave emergency that concerns not only you, but those in a similar situation,” I explain. Shaking his head, I add, “I hate to sound dramatic, but I’m telling it how it is. Though it’s not as serious as what you’re probably imagining.”

Eldy is listening intently. One goes on with his spiel. “Throughout the Imaginary Tree-yes that Imaginary Tree-” They look at me confused. “Wait, do you not know what that is? Ugh, fine. I am here to inform you that there are others like you caught in a leadership role that they have no experience in.”

When they don’t interrupt him, he continues. “After half a year of observation, I’ve declared it my intent to rescue those who’ve been thrust into more…risky scenarios. Imagine this: you wake up lying on a grassy field instead of your bed. You get your bearings when suddenly a bunch of familiar video game characters walk toward you, announce that you’re their long-lost god, and proceed to worship you like a bunch of cul-excited followers.”

“Does this sound familiar?” he asks, testing the waters.

Eldy just nods in lieu of an answer. “But that’s not where it ends. These innocent people soon realize they’re out of their depth; the Seven Nations all flock toward them in fealty. They can’t meet every demand no matter how earnest or hard-working they are. Eventually their ruse would be discovered and they’d be executed.”

He shakes his head in shame and sorrow. “There are those who are hunted down because they looked similar to their god. Some survive, and are forever traumatized for the rest of their life. These are the ones that suffer the most, the ones whose injustice I can’t stand. I wish to help them, and to do that I need your knowledge.”

There’s a tense unsureness in the air now. He knows it’s time to wrap this up. “I know we’ve only just met, but I humbly ask as a fellow being with empathy and decency for your guidance. I know that you have been looking into the multiverse in your spare time, researching this anomaly. Please, share what you know with me and I promise you that I will put a stop to this once and for all.”

Number One bows ninety degrees to hide his frown. “I know what I request sounds big, but all I need from you is to tell me what you know of the anomaly.”

///

As the door closed, Mercy had already shapeshifted. They became taller, their hair grew to waist-length and became colored white; it automatically braided itself too. Their clothing morphed into a black bodysuit with a white-gray sleeveless qipao top over it. Their boots became open-toed heels. When they looked down they found their arms were quite longer than usual.

Mercy walked over to a nearby window. What stared back was a young woman with snow white hair and pale iridescent eyes. Oh. She’s truly a beautiful specimen. Specimen? Spec-ugh, I need to stop hanging around Number Two. He’s infecting me with his diction.

“Anyway, time to pretend to stand guard and not let anyone in. Taking in Shenhe’s homicidal tendencies, she will act as the perfect deterrent,” Mercy said to themself in the disciple’s voice. 

Thus, Mercy crossed their arms and stood in front of the door with a stoic expression. They knew it wouldn’t take long for Number One to ask for permission; Mercy figured it would take approximately ten minutes. Now, how to occupy oneself? The shapeshifter tapped their foot. This shouldn’t be too difficult…

Before they realized it, they began to hum a song. “Think of these thoughts as limitless light exposing, closing circuitry of fright/Think of each moment holding this breath as death minute in decimal…”

From what they could piece together about it, the song was supposed to be about some guy who allegedly murdered his girlfriend. Then they pleaded guilty via insanity in court and were sentenced to shock therapy. The whole thing was morbid, but there was something interesting within it. Mercy kept humming it to themself. At least the beat is catchy.

Several minutes later Mercy sensed someone up ahead. Turning the corner was a pair of teenagers; one had blue hair while the other had white hair. Upon further observation, they looked to be friends; currently they were in passionate discussion about…something related to exorcisms?They were so fixated on it that they didn’t notice Mercy until White-Hair bumped into them.

“Oh! I’m sorry, I didn’t see you-huh!? Aun-auntie Shenhe?” exclaimed White-Hair. He looked at“Shenhe” from head to toe like some sort of inspector. “What are-what are you doing here?”

“What do you mean? Is it not necessary for the Creator to have someone bodyguarding their quarters?” Mercy replied in an emotionless voice. 

Blue-hair looked at White-hair with a curious expression. He leaned in close to his ear and spoke in a hushed voice. “Chongyun, didn’t you say your aunt would be working at Wanmin’s while Xiangling is out?”

Chongyun grunted. “Of course! She even told me this morning herself!”

Uh-oh, better make up an excuse to cover my tracks. What was the restaurant’s owner’s name again? …Oh, right! “Mr. Mao informed me that, ‘because business was going slow for the day, I could clock out early,’. That was what he told me. I figured I deserved an early shift, so that’s what I did.”

“Oh, I see. Well then, could we possibly greet the Creator? We know that it’s currently the time they eat breakfast, but we were wondering if we could ask them a quick question,” Chongyun explained.

“It’s very important that we do!”

Chongyun gave a flat look. “Xingqiu, asking Them if they want to practice martial-arts with you is going to get us in trouble-get you in trouble!”

Xingqiu crossed his arms and looked away indignantly like someone who’d been read like an open book. “I must disagree with you my friend. I simply wish to ask! Should they deny my request, then I will take my leave with no further complaint.”

His exorcist friend put his hands on his hips, clearly unconvinced. Before he could get a word out, Mercy interjected into their conversation. 

 “No means no. I’m afraid you two will have to wait until Their Grace is finished with their meal.” Please go away now, you’re bothering me.

Xingqiu opened his mouth to try again, only for Chongyun to cover it with his hand. The latter shook his head without a word; Xingqiu sighed dejectedly and accepted the silent message. 

The young exorcist nodded to “Shenhe” before he turned around, led Xingqiu down the hall and turned the corner. Mercy counted to ten before they dropped their facade. With a sigh, they covered their face with their hands.

“That was…an experience. Gosh, I thought those two would never leave,” they muttered. Mercy wiped their palms on their pants. I wonder if Number One’s done yet. I’m not sure if I can handle being in the spotlight again… 

Crash

The almost muted sound of porcelain hitting the floor made them snap their head to the door. Just what was going on in there?

///

SEVERAL MINUTES EARLIER…

Number One and Eldy were sipping tea on the balcony.

Number One casually sipped from a teacup while sitting cross-legged in front of Eldy. “So tell me, what are your current projects? I’m excited to hear what someone as great and powerful as you has planned for this Teyvat’s future.”

“Ah, well you know. A bunch of societal reforms are currently in the works,” they replied with a shrug of their leafy coat. Geo crystalflies had gathered in their branches to rest. 

“Like what?” Number One asked curiously.

“Uh-something about banning plastics? I think-I think Neuvillette mentioned something about the waters in Fontaine being polluted the other day.” They made wild gestures in the air. “And then while having my weekly tea with Zhongli, I told him ‘no more sacrificing convicts in my name! I don’t like it!’. It took a while to convince him about it though.”

“Saving life because you think it’s precious. I can respect that.”

They shuffled their feet. “Uh, sure.

“Ah…plastic consumption. Yes, such a devilishly difficult issue to tackle…” the gentleman said thoughtfully. Another sip. “Again, I feel I must apologize for my enthusiasm earlier. I’m supposed to follow protocol, for your information, and be polite about these things. We’re rather…hm, we’re what one might call a stickler for the rules we made.”

Eldy grunted. “Well, good for you guys…”

Number one’s smile was thin. “Hm…alright. I think that’s enough pleasantries. I think it’s time you told me what you know of the SAGAU phenomenon.”

“I..what do you want me to say exactly?” Eldy said with an impatient tone. “All I know is that, back in my old world, SAGAU was nothing more than cheap isekai fanfics and cult aus. Even now, I’m still adjusting to the revelation that it was all real. I haven’t even researched whatever you were talking about-”

CRASH

Number One’s teacup fell to the floor. He was grinning, but there was no mirth in it. His voice sounded like the last strings of patience were snapping.

“Do you mean to tell me,” he said through gritted teeth. “That during these last several months, you’ve been doing nothing besides pretend to be a god, go on dates with Rex Lapis, and live as some kind of glorified pet!?”

“I-I…!” Eldy shrank into themselves like a turtle. The crystalflies sensed their owner’s anxiousness and flew out of the window. “Not…no…!”

“I grow desperate. Please tell me you know something useful. Innocent people are dying in other worlds while you are living a cushy life!” Number One said passionately. His bangs began to float to reveal yellow eyes with multiple red rings inside them.

Eldy said nothing. Instead they silently stared in awe.

////

Mercy was about to open the door when they felt the air begin to charge with energy. Behind them, they heard hurried footsteps. Several pairs of footsteps in fact. Without missing a beat, they immediately changed their form. They shrank until they were about two heads smaller than their original size.

Aw shit. They internally cringed when a hooded figure wreathed in an amber aura appeared followed by several more acolytes; his tail undulated captivatingly. Why him?

Zhongli aka Rex Lapis aka Morax strode up to them. Despite their being several crystalflies perched on his horns, it didn’t reduce the slightly oppressive presence around him. The old god stared at them in half curiosity and confusion. “Barbatos. Move aside.”

“Barbatos” opened his mouth. “Ehhh why the rush? I just finished paying a quick visit to our Emperor. Surely I didn’t intrude on anything important, it’s just breakfast after all!”

“None, but we have reason to suspect the Creator is in danger.”

“For real? Well in that case, allow me to check on them!” “Barbatos” opened the door just enough to slip through it. He gave a mischievous smile to the others before they could realize what happened. “I’ll be quick!”

SLAM

Mercy shifted back into their own form. “Number One we need to leave. Now-wait, what the hell?”

The gentleman was in front of the creator and floating above them; he was pointing at their skull-head. A chain connected his index finger with their head. Neither said anything to each other. They were just looking into each other’s eyes. It was almost creepy to look at. But Mercy shook their head; they were out of time.

“Number One!” they yelled with as much urgency they could muster. That did it. The chain abruptly snapped and retracted back into Number One’s index finger. Eldy landed on their knees. 

He stared at them with a spooked look (huh, what cool eyes he has). “Mercy?”

“Morax is here-” they began. 

Before they could explain further, the door behind them was blown off its hinges with a burst of Geo energy. The shapeshifter crashed into the gentleman and both were sent flying out and off the third floor.

/////////

A/N: Shenhe’s appearance description from wiki & Outfit

I like cliffhangers, especially the kind when they make one ask, “Oh no, they’re probably gonna get it in the next chapter!”. It makes one wonder just what sort of thing they’ll do to get out of it.

In hindsight, Number One had this preconceived image of Eldy. One could say his entire plan hinged on whether or not they knew of the SAGAU phenomenon. So what does he do when he doesn’t find what he needs? He dislikes going back empty-handed so he’ll find something else to get some usefulness out of. I’ll discuss & explore this more in the next chapter, but before I do I’d like to state that Number One cares an awful lot about others (This'll make sense later).

In fact, we’ll get to see more of that side next chapter.

Speaking of the next chapter, it’s gonna take four more days to write fyi. The reasons for this is that 1) I’m burnt out atm and need to recharge somewhat, and 2) I need to go over my research on how to write action sequences. I want this ending to have a solid enough impact and some research would greatly help.

Finally, those Crystalflies are the mvp!

Questions, comments, and critiques are welcome!

Taglist: @idkfitememate

[metaladam]

i request an AU of Adam noticing Lute getting crushed by the Hotel

" HOLY SHIT! LUTE GET OUT OF THERE YOU DUMB BITCH!"

Adam panicked as she saw the hotel shatter from his lightning, Lute caught in the middle of it. As the buildings fell he lost sight of her body amongst the debris of glass, dirt, and cement that consumed his vision. Adam gagged as it filled his mouth and nose, firing lightning blindly Infront of him to make sure sure nothing big collided with him. The enemy could still be out there but he didn't care he just had to fly through the blinding darkness and dig through the remains and find her. That stupid bitch! She should have kept back and let him do his thing! She knew how prone he was to causing collateral damage and that there was nothing here he wanted to protect, or so he'd thought.

When the dust settled he finally began digging through the mess, cutting his fingers on glass and sharp edges of steal from desperation. He had to find her, if she had not been entirely crushed by the building he didn't have long until she suffocated beneath it all. She had to be somewhere down here, he'd flown to where he thought he'd seen it all!

No, no, no, no! She had been his number one for so long. The two of them were together almost all the time. It would be devastating to look to his side only to see the empty space where she would have stood. No, not again, please God, not again. He knew he was a disgusting man child, he knew hew was a train wreck who needed to constantly talk himself up so he could feel some semblance of self worth. He knew he was damaged and a lost cause, but she had been the the only person to accept him anyway. She never held it against him when he was intentionally offensive, when he lashed out at her. She was patient and kind to him. He trusted her.

Who was gonna give him fist bumps or hype him up? Was it just going to be him again? No. Please. It should be him. He should be the one dying here. He was not ready to go back to an empty house. He was not ready to be alone again. No one gave a shit about him in Heaven! Sera saw him as an irritation, Emily hated his guts, his band mates resented him, everyone thought he was annoying. Everyone but her.

It was then after digging for what felt like forever he finally found her broken body, lifting up the larger pieces that lay atop her form he'd cradle her in his arms, his face panicked.

" Hey! Hey you dumb fuck! Wake your ass up! That is an order bitch! You wake the fuck up right now!"