#I WANT HIM DEAD I WANT HIM GONE I WANTED ONE GOOD DAY BEFORE EXAMS IS THAT TOO MUCH FOR YOU PIECE OF SHIT?????

[rooksnooks]

Thank fucking god that the human body is 60% liquid because if there wasn't an explanation for how you could cut me open and find burning magma in there I would just die

[nereidprinc3ss]

omg i'm obsessed with the idea of spencer and a university student and i looooved the one you wrote with reader struggling with finals (i relate so much </3) i'm not sure if you write requests or not (if not, then i'm sorry and please ignore this hahaha) but i would love to see more of their dynamic? maybe spencer for once arrives earlier from a case and goes to pick up reader from university as a surprise? i don't really know but i would love to see more 💗 thank you and i hope you have a good day!

AHHHH omg you have NO IDEA how excited I was to open my inbox and see a request!! i am absolutely obsessed w spencer x uni student too

i kind of took this and ran w it so its a little angsty and random LOLOL but here is (drumroll)

spencer picking up reader after you fail an exam (sorry lol) and you are NOT in a good mood but he loves you so its fine

Tears, partly from the bitter wind and partly from shame, blur your phone screen as you exit the lecture hall. Another missed call from Spencer. It’s the third one today—you've been ignoring them in an attempt to remain focused on the final that you just bombed. Part of you now wants to keep ignoring them out of sheer embarrassment. How can you admit to your super-genius boyfriend that you are a bona fide academic failure? Still, you don’t want him wondering about you while he should be working. Your numb fingers fumble with the phone as you try to call him back without running into anybody on your walk back to student housing. 

It doesn’t reach the second ring before he’s picking up. 

“Hey,” he sighs. “I was starting to worry.” 

“I’m sorry, I’ve been busy,” you exhale, cutting through some trees as you approach your building. “What’s up? How’s the case?” 

“Well... that’s actually what I’ve been calling about. We wrapped up this morning.” 

“What? But last night you said it would be at least three more days.” 

“Rare instance of me being wrong, I guess.” 

“So when are you flying back?” you ask, not wanting to get your hopes up. You know sometimes his team stays behind to help with processing a case. He doesn’t reply for a moment. “Spencer?” 

“I’m... thirteen minutes away from your school. Twelve.” 

Your brain short-circuits as you process his words, the cold metal of the door handle biting into your fingers as you stop dead in your tracks. 

“You--are you driving here right now?” 

“Yes,” he begins, sounding embarrassed, “I kept calling because I wanted to ask first, but I know you had your last final this morning and you were going to come over when I got back anyway so I thought you might want to come stay with me for a few extra days. You can say no, obviously—” 

Some of the icy despair melts in your chest. 

“Of course, I want to.” 

“Good,” he exhales a laugh. “It would have been awkward if you said no. Can you have a bag packed by the time I get there?” 

You’re speedwalking through the lobby now, hitting the up button for the elevator more times than is necessarily effective. 

“Drive faster.” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

By the time you blindly shove enough clothing in a bag, text your roommate to let her know you’ll be gone for the rest of the week, and make it back outside, Spencer’s familiar vintage car is already pulling up to the curb. He doesn’t even bother cutting the engine—just puts it in park and gets out, rounding the vehicle as you close the distance between one another. His smile is brilliant, and though you don’t feel particularly deserving of it, it’s for you. 

“Hi,” you breathe shakily as he loops his arms around your waist. 

“Hi, pretty,” he says, already leaning down to kiss you. It’s soft and sweet over too quickly, but then he’s gently pulling you into him. You drop your bag and bury your face in his jacket, trying to right yourself before you go into an emotional tailspin. 

As usual, he smells like lavender, clove, resinous amber. It makes your head spin. Right away you feel yourself relaxing; feel your guard slipping, like it always does when he’s around. 

“I missed you.” The words are quiet to begin with, muffled further by the fabric of his coat, but you know he’ll hear you. 

“I missed you too,” he murmurs, stroking your hair. “Everything okay?” 

Why are you always surprised when a man who works for the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI accurately analyzes your behavior? 

“Just tired. Can we go home?” You pull back enough to look up at him, meeting his fond—and just a little concerned—gaze, averting your eyes before he has time to discern your... omission of truth. 

“Yeah, angel. Of course we can.” 

He opens the passenger side door for you, making sure you’re settled before tossing your bag in the back seat and circling around the back of the car. 

“Is that coffee?” You say as soon as he slides into the driver’s seat. His eyes dart down to the tumbler in the center cupholder as he buckles. 

“It’s from the jet. You won’t like it.” 

Despite his warning you reach over to grab it, taking a small sip as he puts the car into gear and pulls out of the parking lot. You make a sour face. Spencer glances over. 

“I told you it was bad.” 

You yawn, putting it back in the cupholder. “It was worth a shot.” 

Jazz music plays quietly from the speakers and the heat is blasting, but you’re too busy mentally rehashing question 37 to find it relaxing. 

“You didn’t get enough sleep last night,” he states. Not a question. Outside, the brick buildings of your campus roll by. You wonder if all the students rushing about on the sidewalks and side streets failed any of their finals.  

“Couldn’t,” you mumble flatly, picking at your nails.  

There’s a moment’s pause, and you’re imagining all the things you could have done differently. You’ve never failed a final before. If you’d just studied a little bit harder—if you’d stayed in instead of going out last weekend, if you weren’t so— 

“I’m going to ask you something, and I don’t think you’re going to like it,” Spencer says. 

“Mhm,” you hum, too afraid to speak because your eyes are already stinging again. Honestly, you’re surprised you made it this far without him getting the truth out of you. He offers his hand across the console as you slink down in your seat, and you take it, allowing him to run his thumb over yours in soothing lines. 

“How do you think your final went?” 

You bite the inside of your cheek, the bare branches of the trees outside blurring as you stare unseeingly. 

“Not good. Like, I definitely failed, not good. I'm an idiot.” 

“You absolutely are not an idiot.” 

“You didn’t see me taking the test, Spencer. I literally just sat there staring at it for ten minutes before I even answered one question. It was pathetic.” 

“Did you sleep at all last night?” 

The question takes you by surprise. Your frown deepens. 

“What? I don’t—that’s not—" 

“Just answer the question. Did you sleep at all last night?” 

“Yes!” 

“Don't lie to me.” 

“Fuck you! I slept for like two hours and had coffee this morning!”  

He squeezes your hand. 

“That’s why you failed.” 

The first tear traces its path down your cheek, composure overwhelmed by the confrontation. 

“I hate when you use your stupid interrogation tactics on me,” you say, voice wobbling. And then the crying begins in earnest. 

“I know, baby.” 

His hand moves to rub your back when you let go to cover your face. Torrential evidence of your frustration and utter exhaustion well over, slipping through your fingers despite your best efforts to stop them from coming at all. Having an emotional breakdown in the passenger seat of his car is far from how you’d wanted to greet Spencer’s surprise arrival, but you’re too worn out to mask your emotions—especially when he is so adept at drawing them to the surface. 

A moment passes like that before you take a shuddering breath, raising your head slightly and wiping your cheeks with your sleeves in vain. 

“I should have been able to do it. I just—it was like I was reading the questions and I knew that I should know the answers, but I couldn’t remember anything.” 

“You’re exhausted. Sleep deprivation has an immediate, devastating effect on cognitive functioning levels. My recall and processing speed start to fail when I’m tired, too. It has nothing to do with how smart you are.” 

It makes sense—but it doesn’t make you feel much better. You wanted to ace this exam. Of course, Spencer wouldn’t understand because school was as easy as breathing for him. He barely had to try to get three doctorates. It’s possible, you suppose, that dating a genius has put an academic chip on your shoulder—maybe you’ve set impossibly high standards for yourself.  

After a few minutes the crying finally ebbs, if only because you’re running into supply and demand problems with your tear ducts. You rub your weepy eyes on your shoulder, leaning against the cold window and watching DC go by. 

“You know, the final isn’t as important as you think it is. You’ll still pass the class.” 

“It’s symbolic,” you mumble, breath fogging up the glass. Spencer hums, still rubbing your back. 

“I know. I know it matters to you, but I don’t want you to think one bad grade is a reflection of who you are. Do you understand why it doesn’t make sense to measure something as abstract as intelligence by a metric as one dimensional as a standardized test?” 

“Yes.” 

“Good.” 

You shift in your seat, wiping your face with your sleeve and prompting Spencer to take your other hand once more. 

“Can your FBI friend hack the university database and give me an A?” you ask after a moment, sniffling. 

“Absolutely not.” 

“Pretty please?” 

“Nope.” 

“It’s like you don’t even love me,” you mutter, angling yourself away from him.  

He pulls your hand toward him and presses a kiss to the back of it. 

“I love you so much that I don’t want you to get expelled for academic dishonesty.” 

“It doesn’t matter anyway. I’ll probably just drop out.” 

You both know you’re just being overdramatic, but Spencer has a tendency to be sweet even when you don’t deserve it. 

“I’ll love you no matter what you do.” 

You blush, unable to come up with a sufficient reply. His eyes slide to you briefly and he smirks, clearly enjoying his ability to fluster you, and by extension, get you to shut up. 

“Eyes on the road, genius,” you grumble. But for the first time today you’re fighting a smile instead of tears. 

[pomefioredove]

heyyy! i really love your writing🥹🥹 btw can i request a hc with riddle and jamil (separated) with gn!reader who’s very lazy and they have a test and only study the morning before the test? but somehow pass?? i wanna see their reaction

anyway sorry if i made any mistakes, this is my very first request and english is not my first language😔 it’s fine if you can’t do it!!

-🎲

no worries! this is a great request, their reactions would be very funny

summary: reader miraculously passes a test they last-minute studied for type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, jamil additional info: platonic or romantic, reader is not specified to be yuu, reader is gender neutral, not proofread

Jamil knew that it wasn't his place to judge

after all, being raised with the al-Asims, he'd been taught to keep his bitter thoughts to himself

but something about your carelessness reminded him all too much of Kalim

...okay... maybe you weren't exactly partying, or spacing out, but your complete lack of conviction is almost identical

and, so, Jamil decides to give you a word of advice the day before the big exam

"Worried about tomorrow's History of Magic test?"

he even gives you a big smile, trying to play it off as a casual question

you shrug. "Eh, not really,"

"If I were you, I'd be a little more concerned. The grading system is very strict at NRC,"

and with that, he's gone

his sly remark, spoken as if in friendly conversation, leaves him feeling a little more satisfied with himself

he doesn't even feel irked when Kalim nearly sleeps through the test, or when he forgets his notes, or when he absent-mindedly reads the questions aloud during...

in fact, Jamil is quite confident that in any case, you'll do much worse than Kalim, which saves the both of them

after the exam scores are posted in the hall, you find him

"What did you get?"

Jamil hates answering these kinds of questions, especially knowing that he could be in the top of the class if he was allowed to try. "Passing. And you?"

"Well..." you smile. "I really thought about what you said, so I studied this morning."

Jamil's sour mood at his own score seems to lighten

you studied the morning of the exam? oh, this was going to be rich

"...And I got full marks!"

...what.

you show him the paper and it takes all his strength to keep his usual poker face

otherwise, his jaw would drop

"How did... how?"

you shrug. "Good study plan, I guess,"

"Hmph," he crosses his arms. "Well, then... you'll have to come tutor Kalim sometime. What works for you must work for him,"

Riddle spends the entire week pestering you about studying

"I just don't feel like it," you groan

goodness. you sound just like that terrible Floyd...

"It's not a matter of want, it's a matter of need. This exam counts for a significant amount of your grade!"

"Eh... I'll just wing it,"

wing it?! oh, now you've really done it

"Consider yourself lucky for not being a part of Heartslabyul. I would have your head for that!"

and then he storms out. how graceful!

when he sees you the following afternoon, that calm, unbothered look of yours is still on your face. it drives him mad

"If I were you, I'd be praying," he says. he's almost smug about it

Riddle earns full points on every exam- it's just a given. he's sure that the two of you will be on polar opposites of the grade spectrum once the results are posted

you shrug. "Yeah, about that... I thought about what you said, and decided that I don't want to have to retake this class. So I studied this morning,"

he almost smirks. "One last-minute cram won't be enough to raise your grade above failing, I'm afraid. But perhaps this will serve as a lesson, next time you-"

Riddle stops dead in his tracks as Trein posts the exam results on the wall behind you

his eyes widen

"Full... full marks?! We're in the same percent!? How is that possible?!"

You chuckle as his face goes all red, both frustrated and flustered

"Hey, you should count this as a victory for yourself. You give great advice,"

[achilles-rage]

Good Luck Charm: Chapter 2

college football player!buck x plus size!reader

summary: the next day in class, you come face to face with him again. while you don't want to keep running into him, circumstances soon mean that you'll have to spend more time together, much to his delight.

word count: 3.4k

previous chapter

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A/N: y'all this chapter took me so long to write. it's more just filler so they don't immediately go from enemies (if i can even call it that) to lovers and i PROMISE things will get better in the next chapter because it kinda starts to go down a little hehe. enjoy<3

warnings: slightly enemies to lovers??? slowburn(ish)????, no use of y/n, fem!reader, race inclusive!reader

The next day, you walk into class, your day going a lot smoother than yesterday. You’re a few minutes early, so you take your time getting your stuff out of your bag before you start typing away on your laptop, trying to make yourself look busy.

You’ve almost forgotten about the man you met yesterday, opting not to tell your roommate. You know what she’d say. She’d make you tell her everything about him (and probably find his social medias despite not even knowing his name), and then tell you every single thing she would’ve done if she was in your situation. You’d rather just forget about it, not wanting him to take up any more of your energy.

“Excuse me.” you hear a deep voice say from beside you after a few minutes. You assume it’s someone trying to get by you to sit down in your aisle, so you quickly stand up to get out of his way. As you stand, you steal a glance at him, huffing as you see that it’s the man you ran into yesterday, and a deep frown finds its way onto your face. You sit back down once he’s past you, rolling your eyes when instead of moving down the aisle, he chooses to sit right beside you.

“You look gorgeous today, princess, despite the scowl on your face.” he teases, letting out a soft chuckle at how quickly your face fills with distaste.

“Why are you doing this?” you whisper-yell, turning your head to glare at him. Why does he want to continue with this? You walked away from him yesterday, you thought you were done with him.

“Doing what? I gave a pretty girl a compliment, what’s wrong with that?” he teases softly, a playful glint in his eye as he meets your gaze. Despite his tone, he’s dead serious. He thinks you’re gorgeous, and he’s going to keep talking to you until you believe it. He thought about you all day yesterday, and it’s a miracle you happened to have this class with him too.

“Why are you so interested in me all of a sudden?” you ask as your tense shoulders deflate slightly. You lean further back in your chair, eyes going to the front of the room as the professor walks in. You’re really not feeling argumentative today, so your voice comes out less cold than he’s used to in hopes of your lack of a fight deterring him.

“Because I like a girl with an attitude.” he teases softly, not missing the way your voice is changing as the seconds go by, your attitude crumbling right in front of his eyes. While seeing you with less of an attitude is fun, he wants to take it a step further, not wanting to stop until your attitude is gone and you’re giving him a sweet smile he’s sure will make him fold.

“You’re infuriating.” you get out quietly just as the professor starts speaking. You train your eyes on the professor, trying to ignore the way his arm and thigh are pressed against yours. 

Your professor goes over the plan for the course and the assignment instructions before bringing up the final assignment. Rather than an exam, your class will have an assignment worth 40% of your grade that you have to present during the last week of classes, and you must work with a partner. 

“I’ve decided to make it easy for you. Take a look at the person beside you, they’ll be your partner. I figured I’d get partners out of the way now to make sure no one has an excuse to ask for an extension at the end of the semester. I’ll give you a minute to introduce yourselves and exchange information.” your professor tells the class before turning to her computer. The noise in the classroom increases slightly as people around you start talking to their partners.

Your eyes widen slightly at her words, and you sink further into your chair with a groan as you see him turn to look at you out of the corner of your eye.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me, princess.” he says smuggly, a smirk making its way onto his face. He almost can’t contain his excitement. This is a big assignment, and now, you have to hang out with him for the rest of the semester.

You roll your eyes at his words, and then turn to glare at him, which earns a soft chuckle from his lips.

“We should just get this over with. I’m less busy at the start of the semester anyway, so we should get most of it done early.” you tell him, noticing that he’s being less than subtle as his eyes glance down to your chest. You’re wearing a dress today that’s lower cut than you usually wear, and he had noticed the way your dress hugs your curves as soon as you stood up to let him past you.

“You’re just dying to get me alone, aren’t you?” he teases, his smirk widening at your clear annoyance of being stuck by him. He’s glad you want to get to work so soon; he doesn’t think he can go long without seeing you again, even with the classes you share. “I’m free on Thursday, you can come over and we can start working on it.”

You scoff at his words, rolling your eyes. Of course he wants you at his house. You’re sure you’re not the first girl he’s tried to lure into his house under the guise of doing class work.

“Absolutely not. We’ll meet at the library.” you counter, narrowing your eyes at him, as if daring him to argue.

“Alright, alright. But if you change your mind at any time, the offer still stands,” he says, giving you a wink, and running his tongue along the inside of his cheek. He may be teasing, but he means it. He wants to see you in his room, in his bed, and he’s pretty confident that you’ll give in eventually. “I’ll meet you there at 10?” 

“Fine.” You turn your head back to the front of the room, crossing your arms over your chest. You hope he’ll let you be after this, because as much as you don’t like him, you’re afraid that if he keeps complimenting you, you won’t be able to resist him.

“I should probably get your number too, you know, so I can text you. About the assignment.” You tilt your head back at his words and close your eyes, huffing loudly. Mumbling a “fine” as you snatch the phone from his hands and put your name and number into his phone. You shove the phone back at him, and cross your arms again, keeping your eyes glued to the front of the room.

He looks down at his phone as you hand it back, realizing as he reads your name that he hadn’t even noticed that he didn’t know your name until now, his nickname for you just felt right. He mumbles your name as his eyes trace it on the screen, memorizing it. He lets it roll around on his tongue as he gets used to the feel of your name on his tongue.

“I’m Evan, by the way.” he informs you after a moment, licking his lip as he turns to take in your features again, just as the professor begins to speak again.

“Awesome.” you reply sarcastically, opening your laptop again as your professor continues her lecture, ignoring his attention on you.

He doesn’t try to talk to you for the rest of class, both of you sitting silently and taking notes as the professor speaks. You do feel his eyes on you every once in a while, however, and you try to ignore the way your stomach flutters every time you feel his thigh pushing against yours more as the time ticks. It’s like a constant reminder of how close he is to you.

Once class is over, you let out a long sigh as you start putting your stuff back in your bag. He stands up at the same time you do, following you out of the room.

“So, where are you off to? We could-” he starts as he catches up to you, eyes trained on you as you move around people lingering in the hallway.

“I have to go to class.” you say quickly, hoping he gets the hint. You don’t really have class, but even just his presence is making you feel dizzy. He’s so annoying, and yet you can’t help but welcome how he keeps trying to talk to you.

“Sure you do, princess.” he teases. But he doesn’t push further. He slows his pace as you keep walking, checking you out as you walk away, then yells after you. “I’ll see you on Thursday!”

He chuckles softly to himself as you keep walking and pulls out his phone, finding your contact and sending you a quick text. He just wishes you were still right beside him so he could see how you react.

You look down at your phone as it vibrates, seeing a text from an unknown number. Your brows furrow as you open the text, but you roll your eyes once you read the text. You fight back a smile, knowing exactly who it’s from, feeling your face grow hot as you read and reread the text. 

Unknown Number: You look good in that dress by the way, princess ;)

On Wednesday night, after hanging out with your roommate for a few hours, you get ready for bed. You still haven’t told her about Evan, as you really don’t want to hear everything she would undoubtedly say about him. You had previously learned that talking about someone only makes you think of them more, so you decide it would be better to not talk about him at all with anyone. Once you shower and do your night routine, you get into bed. You’re almost asleep when you hear your phone vibrate beside you. You huff, rolling over and picking up your phone to read the text. 

Evan: Are we still meeting at the library tomorrow, or have you already deleted and blocked my number?

You: Unfortunately, I can’t do that until after this semester is over

Evan: Good. I get to see your cute angry face until the end of the semester ;)

You: I’m going to bed now.

Evan: Oh, are you? Are you in bed right now?

You: Yes.

Evan: What are you wearing?

You: Goodnight, Evan.

Evan: Goodnight, princess.

He chuckles softly at your texts, knowing his teasing is getting a rise out of you. He lays in his bed, wondering what exactly you’re doing right now. Are you smiling? Are you rolling your eyes? Maybe both, he’s not sure. He knows he wants to see you right now. Better yet, he wants you in his bed instead, laying under him with his hand over your mouth so you don’t wake up his roommates. He smirks at the thought, closing his eyes as he imagines how you would react as he trails kisses down your body. How your plush body would feel under his hands. He drifts off to sleep very easily.

You can’t help the smile that creeps onto your face as you read his texts. You shake your head and put your phone back down on your table and lay back down on your back, staring at the ceiling. He really needs to stop doing this. You’re afraid that pretty soon, your roommate will catch on, or see a text from him, and then you really won’t be able to hide your growing feelings. You have a hard time sleeping that night, unable to get your mind off of him and his stupid texts.

The next day, you drag yourself out of bed far later than when your alarm goes off. You think you snoozed it twice, but when you finally unlock your phone and check the time, you realize you had snoozed it for 40 minutes. You get out of bed quickly and go to the bathroom to get ready, hoping he wouldn’t give you an attitude for being a few minutes late. Once you get ready and change, you grab your bag and head out the door, walking quickly to the library.

You groan as you walk into the library, seeing him already there and leaning against the wall, staring at his phone. As if he senses your presence, he looks up at you, a smirk forming on his face as his eyes quickly trace over your figure and he shoves his phone in his pocket.

“Rough night, princess?” he teases, pushing off the wall and walking towards you. He’s met with a scowl as you look up at him, huffing as you walk right past him and further into the library.

“Shut up, I didn’t have time to make coffee this morning. Let’s get this over with.” you grumble over your shoulder, going over to the elevator.

“Yes ma’am.” he hums, turning to follow you. You both get in the elevator and you press the button for the group study floor before crossing your arms over your chest and tapping your foot lightly. He chuckles at this, licking his lips before speaking.

“You’re cranky in the morning, huh?” he states, mirroring your stance and crossing his arms over his chest. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you really hated me.”

“It’s a little bit of both, I guess.” you murmur, stepping off the elevator as it gets to the 5th floor. He chuckles under his breath as he follows you, shaking his head. He’ll just have to give you a little while to wake up before he continues, he thinks, not wanting to dig the hole any deeper and make you actually hate him.

Once you’re set up at an empty table, sitting beside each other, you begin talking about the assignment, not wanting to waste any time. He surprisingly doesn’t give you any smartass remarks as you speak, and even gives you a few ideas for the assignment. Honestly, you’re a little surprised. From looking at him, you sort of assume he would make you do everything yourself, but he seems willing to put in the work. He seems to know his stuff too. He isn’t as dumb as you thought he may be. Maybe that’s not very nice of you, but you can’t help but think of him as one of those guys that only got into this school because they’re good at football.

You lighten up after a few hours of working together, giving him a few soft smiles as he slowly starts joking and flirting with you. He can tell that you’re still a little shy, as you keep trying to hide your smile by looking away from him, but he can see it. He wants to see it more, but he can also tell that you’re still trying to keep your walls up, despite his best efforts.

“You know, you’re a lot more fun when you don’t have that little attitude.” he tells you after a few minutes of silence. You look up at him, narrowing your eyes slightly as you fight back a smile by pursing your lips. 

“You’re a lot less annoying when you’re not being such a guy.” you counter, a small smirk making its way onto your face as his face scrunches up in confusion.

“What does that even mean?” he asks with a small chuckle, turning in his chair to face you completely, your assignment forgotten.

“Exactly what I said. You’re only focused on yourself. You walk around like no one else matters but you. And if I had to guess, you’re on some sort of sports team too, right?” you say, shutting your laptop slowly, turning your upper body towards his with an eyebrow raised.

“Uh, yeah. Football.” He’s confused at where you’re going with this, but he’s curious to know more. Maybe he’ll find out why you’re resisting giving into him so much.

“Exactly. All athletes carry themselves the same: like they’re too good for everyone around them because you’re good at whatever you do. That’s how you were when we met. Acting like the world revolved around you.” you explain, moving your arms as you speak. He raises his brows in surprise, and his smirk grows as he runs his tongue along the inside of his cheek.

“I was not. You were. You practically bit my head off after you bumped into me.” he argues, keeping a smile on his face, letting you know that he isn’t seriously upset about it. As much as he likes the softer exterior you’ve had the last few hours, he thinks it’s fun when you argue with him.

“Okay, whatever.” you mumble, turning back to your laptop and opening it again. Did he have to keep reminding you of that? It was a bad thing to do, you know that, and you just want to forget how you acted when you met him. It wasn’t like anything you’d do normally.

“Nuh uh. Come on, don’t shut back down again. I’m not holding it against you. It was cute.” he tells you quickly, noticing the way you’re slowly starting to close yourself off again. He nudges your arm with his, hoping you’ll look back up at him as he ducks his head, hoping to meet your eyes.

“Yeah, and it was really cute when you trapped me in the classroom so you could tell me that it was all my fault.” you say softly as you tilt your head up to look into his eyes, your eyes narrowed slightly as you bite the inside of your cheek. You aren’t sure what to make of his words. Why the hell did he keep complimenting you like this?

“So, you think I’m cute?” he teases, leaning onto the table and resting his chin on his folded arms. You scoff softly, laughing as you turn back to your laptop, going back to your assignment research.

You work for another few minutes in silence as he stays in the same position, eyes glancing between your face and your laptop screen every once in a while. You think he’s finally got all the talking out of his system when he speaks again in a softer voice.

“You really don’t like me much, do you?” Your eyes soften at his words as a quiet sigh escapes your lips. You close your laptop again and peer down at him, taking a moment to gather your thoughts.

“I don’t not like you. It’s just, I don’t understand why you’re doing this.” you say softly, tilting your head to the side as you look down at him. You can tell that he really is trying not to be a dick to you, and when he’s looking at you with those big blue eyes, you feel a little bad about how you’re treating him.

“Doing what?” he asks curiously, lifting his head from the table and putting a hand under his chin to rest his head. He tilts his head the same way as you, hoping that if he stares long enough into your eyes, he’ll understand your feelings towards him. “This. I don’t know,” you start, gesturing to him with your hands outstretched. “First, you were a dick, and now you’re trying to, like, get to know me or something. I kinda thought you’d just make me do the entire assignment by myself.” you explain, looking down at the table, laughing softly at your last sentence. He scoffs and puts a hand to his chest, as though your words physically wounded him.

“You hurt me, princess. I’m not a complete douchebag.” he tells you, and although his voice has a teasing tone, his eyes show a glint of hurt at your words. He truly hadn’t meant to be a dick; he was merely trying to get you to keep talking to him. Maybe you aren’t like some of the girls he’s used to. Maybe he has to try a different approach, he thinks.

“Yeah, we’ll see.” you hum softly, turning your attention back to your laptop, trying to fight back a smile. 

Okay, maybe he’s not as bad as you thought.

next chapter

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[iiwontgiveuponmilkk]

Locked Away. | G.W.

summary: dating george is her biggest secret, one she hopes her family never finds out.

word count: 2207

warnings: mentions of weight loss from traumatic situation

notes: finally rewrote this. just want to let you guys know that i am working on requests and turning the blurbs into fics. hoping to get them posted this week! i had a few exams last week so i didn't have too much time to write :)

Dating George Weasley had been her biggest secret. One she intended to keep to herself. She had a plan. She was moving out at the end of the month, once George and Fred had finished setting up their shop and moving into their place. She was looking for a place of her own, not wanting to intrude on Fred. George had insisted that Fred was fine with it. He was more than happy to have his brother’s girlfriend move in. Fred really didn’t mind. He knew the situation. He knew what could happen if her family found out whilst she was living under their roof. He was fine with her living with them, she was part of the family. But her secret wasn’t only hers to keep. Draco had found out one night at the end of her final term. He swore he wouldn’t tell, but she didn’t trust him. He was twisted with the same mindset that her parents shared. One of blood traitors and mudbloods. She knew it was only a matter of time before he told his father, but she was hoping that she would be long gone before he let her secret slip. Unfortunately, she wasn’t. Once her parents had found out, they ranted and raved. To say they were livid was an understatement. 

“A Weasley?!” Her mother had screamed, disgust evident on her facial features. Her eyes welled with tears as she took in her mother’s hateful gaze. She knew they had just labelled her as a blood traitor for even associating with the Weasley family. And to date one? There was no coming back from that in her parents eyes. She knew it in her heart, she could see it in their faces. She was as good as dead to them. She tried to blink back her tears, but her father started to yell. She flinched at his tone, terror blooming in her bones as he glared at her. “You would associate our family name with those blood traitors?! How dare you!” His words hit her where it hurt. She loved George with everything she had. Her family name meant nothing to her, but she couldn’t tell her father that. It had been bad enough when she had been sorted into Ravenclaw. The first in her family to not be sorted into Slytherin. She knew her parent’s disdain for her had grown with each passing year. The more she was outside of their way of thinking, the more she blossomed into the person she always wanted to be. She never shared how she felt or thought with her parents, but they knew. They hated the person she had made herself, hated that she didn’t care about blood status or wealth. She was everything they were not, everything her family was not. “Daddy! I love him!” She shouted back as her tears finally spilt over. She couldn’t hold them back, not as her father screamed at her. She had heard it a million times. That she was a disappointment to their family and everything it stood for. But the venom behind his words hurt more than ever this time. The way he spoke of George shattered her heart. He was such a great man, so kind, so willing to give even when he had nothing to share. Her father tensed up, his face swallowed by rage. He took a moment to settle himself, a cold smile settling over his lips. “You’re going away, far away.” Her father spoke in a contemptuous voice. She had never felt more fear in her life. She knew nothing good would come from this. This would be her punishment. -

Her days had been hell. She had been locked away with her aunt, Bellatrix. She spent her days avoiding the evil woman, barely eating what she was given (she did not trust Bellatrix Lestrange), and her nights were spent crying. She was rarely alone in the house, someone was always there. She kept to her room, avoiding contact with anyone in the house. Her health had declined, she looked visibly ill. She was sure she had lost a massive amount of weight, none of her clothes fit her right. Living in this hell seemed to be the easiest part to handle. She was suffering from the hardest and most avoidable heartbreak of her life. She longed for George. She longed to hear him laugh, to see his red hair in the sunlight, just to even see his handwriting on a piece of parchment. She only had her memories and the bracelet he had given her for their anniversary last year. She never took it off, it looked like a normal piece of jewellery. A slim gold cuff that held their secret love. She only took it off at night so she could look at the engraving on the inside. ‘I love you’ in his handwriting adorned the inside of the cuff. It was the only piece of him she had left. She couldn’t imagine what he was thinking. Did he think that she just left him? That she decided it was too much to keep this secret? Or did he think the worst. 

- She had sent an owl to George a week ago, telling him not to respond, but to meet her where they first met on the 4th of October. The task of sending an owl had not been easy. She had carefully planned it for weeks. She had started to leave her room, to play the game of being who her family had wanted her to be. That’s when Bellatrix started to pop out for quick errands. She was never gone for more than thirty minutes at a time, so she knew she had to be quick. She knew that she would have no way of knowing if George received the owl, but it was her only shot. Even if he didn’t she had formulated a back-up plan. She would travel to the burrow, she knew Molly would be there and wouldn’t turn her away. She kept playing the game until the day finally came. She was terrified that Bellatrix would somehow figure out what she had done. She lived in fear of retaliation for three weeks. She knew today had to be the day. Bellatrix left for the longest time on the 4th of every month. She wasn’t sure what her aunt did, but she knew she would be gone for at least an hour. She knew if she timed everything right, not even the house elves would see her make her escape. Her heart pounded as she waited for Bellatrix to leave. She shut her eyes tightly, waiting to hear the door shut. She grabbed the bag of floo powder and ran down to the fireplace when she was sure the coast was clear. She threw the powder down as she stated her desired location.

She looked around, hoping to spot a head of red hair. She trembled in the cold air, looking around for any sign of George. Her lip trembled when she realised he either didn’t get her owl or chose not to show. But he would’ve shown, right? Her George wouldn’t give up on her that easily. She brushed her fingers through her hair, knowing she had to keep moving. She didn’t feel safe just waiting around. She was sure she only had thirty minutes before Bellatrix would return and realise that she was missing. She quickly found herself to be lost in the hectic mess of Diagon Alley. She had forgotten how busy it would be here. She kept her head down, moving to her next destination. She tried her best to avoid bumping into anyone or drawing any attention to herself. But that’s when she saw it, the beginnings of a joke shop, a new joke shop bearing the Weasley name. She made her way towards the building, pushing the door open and walking inside. 

“Oh, we’re not ope- (y/n)?” Fred spoke as he turned to see who had walked in. She nodded her head, looking around at the place. Fred seemed to lose his voice as he took in his brother’s girlfriend. She looked sick, he had never seen her this thin. “George.” He spoke, realising that his words came out much quieter than he intended. She met Fred’s eyes. He could see the dark circles under her eyes and the gaunt look to her face. He noticed the tears brimming her eyes. She took in a shaky breath, breaking her gaze to look around the shop again. She was amazed at everything. Her heart ached at the fact that she wasn’t here with him, the both of them, like she said she would be. She had planned to help them get everything set and ready for the day that they finally opened, but she had been away for months. 

“George!” Fred, this time, shouted. The sound shocked her. Fred cringed as he watched her coil into herself from the sound of him shouting. That’s when Fred realised that something had happened to her. He turned, quickly making his way up the stairs to catch George before he descended. “George, did that owl say anything at all?” He asked as he barred his twin from descending. “Just to meet her, but she wasn’t there. Why?” George gave Fred an odd look as his brows furrowed. “She’s here, Georgie. And she’s not well. Something happened to her.” Fred kept his voice low, hoping she couldn’t hear them. George gave him a small nod before they both made their way down to the shop floor. George did his best to hide his immediate reaction to the state she was in. His heart melted as he watched her face light up when she saw him. A smile spread across her face and then she was moving, running towards him. When she reached him, she jumped. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, clinging to him. 

“Oh I’ve missed you.” George murmured into her hair. He wrapped an arm around her waist, holding her against him tightly. His other hand came up to tangle his fingers in her hair. He pressed his cheek against her head, eyes falling shut as he enjoyed having her in his arms again. It took a moment for George to realise that she was crying. The tears had been silently rolling down her cheeks as she buried her face into his shoulder, but the soft sob that racked her body gave her away. George didn’t say anything to her, just held her tighter. “Fred, I’m going to take the rest of the day off, if you don’t mind?” He asked his twin, only to receive a nod. -

She had been living with George and Fred above the joke shop since the day she had arrived two months ago. She felt like she was living in fear. She hardly ever left the apartment, not wanting to venture out and potentially run into her family. She was surprised that they hadn’t shown up here. It would seem obvious that this is where she would go. Perhaps they had given up on her, and she was more than okay with that. How could she not be after what they did to her? Sending her to live in her own personal Azkaban. George had found her curled up in his bed that morning, gently shaking her awake. She looked at him with tired eyes, pulling the blankets up until only her eyes were visible. He gave her a small smile, he loved how much she hated getting up. He knew she would always prefer a warm bed until mid-afternoon if she had it her way. 

“Mornin’.” She mumbled, closing her eyes as she rubbed them. She let out a yawn, pushing the blanket down a bit. A gasp left her when she focused her attention on George. There he was, down on one knee, next to the bed. She quickly scrambled to the edge of the bed, reaching for George. “What are you doing?” She asked as she took his face in both her hands. “This isn’t how I really wanted to do this, but I don’t think I could wait any longer.” He said, staring up at her. She could see the nervous smile as he reached into his pocket to pull out a ring. “Merlin! George!” Her hands moved to his, she could feel the tears welling in her eyes. 

“Would you do me the honour of becoming Mrs. Weasley?” He asked, smiling as he watched the emotions flicker through her eyes. “Yes, George, of course.” She quickly stammered out, realising she had been staring for a tad too long when she saw a small look of anxiety on his face. He took her left hand, gently sliding the ring onto her finger. She studied the ring as he slid it on. It looked like it had cost a fortune. The diamond was surrounded by a ring of small rubies and sapphires. She kissed him gently, wrapping her arms around him. He picked her up in a tight hug. She wrapped her legs around his waist, nuzzling her face into his neck.

[safination]

Partners in Death...And Life

Part 5: Glimpse of Me and You: Part i

|Part 4: The Radio Stars' Co-Host Just Wants To Do The Dishes| |Part 5: Gimpse of me and you: Part ii| |Masterlist| Ao3| Taglist| Pairings: Alastor x wife! Reader Tags: fem!reader, established relationships, Asexual! Alastor, Reader is in hell for a reason Warning: Blood and dead bodies <3| A little bit suggestive Series summary: After a seven-year absence, you find the man you were married to in life, not only back in town, but also helping...*checks notes*... the Princess of Hell run a hotel aimed at rehabilitating sinners who were sent to the bad place for a reason. Now, I know what you must be thinking. Part 1? Yeah…this chapter is supposed to actually be much longer, but the second part of the fic isn’t complete yet and I have like two more exams. And biochemistry isn’t something to laugh about. I am slowly losing my mind. I close my eyes and I see aldehydes and hemiketals. Anyway, part two of this will be posted in like two or three days. It’s already drafted, just need to edit it. So here’s a bite size chapter. It contains marriage years 1930 and 1931. 1932 isn't complete yet, sadly. It was quite long, so part 2 will just be 1932.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

1930

 That blasted car is too far.

With each step, the tip of your heels scrape the pavement. Shoe maintenance tells you that dragging the rubber tip shortens its lifespan, but your toes pinch when you lift your shoe. Alastor takes long strides, walking with the pace of a man with his ass on fire. Pick a struggle. One either walks fast but takes short strides, or walks slow but takes long strides. It’s unethical to have both.

Streetlamps illuminate the sidewalk. The dried leaves scattered around catch on your shoe, and the city’s smog particles stick on your skin.

The city sucks ass.

Alastor will have to drag you by the hair to force you to take another step on this cockroach infested streets. One taste of that fresh air surrounding your shared home, and suddenly, you’ve gone soft. Gone are the days where second-hand smoke reminded you of home. Now, home is the radio’s volume turned up in ungodly hours.

Alastor tightens his arm around yours, pulling you closer to him.

He’s wearing his favorite bowtie tonight. Everything from the shine of his shoes to the way he combed his hair screams fancy…except for that bowtie. It’s not something meant for exquisite dinners with your wife. You didn’t understand his instance. It was something you picked up on your way home one day, a measly scrap of fabric you purchased back when you didn’t know what good quality bow ties were. Alastor should know of its poor quality, yet he calls it his favorite.

Alastor lowers closer to your ear. “Is this your way of telling me you wish to visit the city’s zoo?”

“Zoo…?” you echo. These shoes are going straight in the garbage bin once you get home. “Why would I want to go there?”

Alastor presses a kiss on your cheek. “I thought you were doing a penguin impression. It's a rather fabulous one, might I add.”

“Ha…Ha…Ha. It’s because I’m walking like a penguin. Not your best one, dearest,” you say, patting his biceps. They’re firmer than they look. “That’s a little bit on the nose. Is it an off night for you?”

“Your feet are hurting,” Alastor tells you like you don’t feel the way your toes slowly lose blood circulation. “I wonder…. Will you deny it? Or are you willing to humble yourself before me, and ask for a seat? There’s still a few more blocks until we reach the car.”

Now, there’s absolutely no way you are going to tell Alastor how your feet pinch and your ankle wobble. With a bright smile, and sheer acting, you continue walking. “Did you do this on purpose?”

Alastor raises his eyebrows. “You were the one who insisted on accompanying me.”

“Well, my feet feel perfectly normal,” you say as your toes buzz. “This is nothing. You should see how long I’m on my feet during work.”

“Yes, because that is a perfectly acceptable thing to happen in workplaces, dearest.” Alastor tightens his arm once more. His thumb brushes up and down your arm. “I would say it pains me to say this, but we both know that would be a lie. I told you so.”

“You did not, actually,” you say, shaking your foot to dislodge the leaves sticking to the bottom of your shoe. “You barely took one glance and said, ‘Those look lovely, dear!’.”

Alastor pauses his steps, and turns to you with a smile. The night does little to dull how bright his brown eyes shine like stardust to you.

He reaches out towards you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. He tugs on your ear, and you slap his hand away. Alastor massages his hand. “That hurt, you know,” he says. “But I meant about waiting. You should still be enjoying your drink.”

“And leaves my dearest, darling husband out here? Alone?” you snort, pulling him to continue walking. “I think I remember someone telling me that thieves don’t dissolve in the sun. Imagine them in the dark!”

“And what would be your plan if we both get robbed?”

You show Alastor your biggest smile. “It’s a good thing I have such a big and scary husband to protect me …. .You…You would protect me, right?”

Alastor’s laughter rings across the air. It’s breathy and light and absolutely everything to you.

Alastor grabs your hand and intertwine his fingers around yours. He leads you further into the streets. Soon, smooth pavements replace the pot holes. Leaves replace the scattered beer cans. Grass replace the asphalt roads. Treen replace the buildings. Alastor pulls you deeper into some tiny park where the streetlamps are brighter, and the air smells closer to home.

You follow him, squeezing his hand.

Alastor squeezes back.

At the corner of this park, a children’s playground stands.

The dark does little to dull the bright colors of the seesaw and monkey bars. In the middle, a pirate-shim themed deck connects to a slide. The swing sways lazily with the nudge of the night’s breeze. There’s not a single living soul except for you and him. It’s eerie to see such a place empty when it should be filled to the brim with the life of children’s laughter.

Alastor’s strides become longer, and his pace even faster as he pulls you closer to the playground’s swing.

He releases his grip, and suddenly, your hand belongs to you once more. Alastor brushes the sand off the swing, and offers you a seat with a bow and outstretched arms.

You take the seat. The pressure lifts from your buzzing toes. It’s almost heavenly.

Alastor slides his coat off his shoulders. With soft giggles and a stupid smile, you watch him pull his arm out. Sleeve garters are worn for practical uses, but as a fashion piece….Hmmm, it’s a great look on him. It’s a shame Alastor often hides how those garters compliment his biceps with a coat. How long would it take to hide every single coat he owns?

Alastor slides his eyes to you. It lingers. “Stop that.”

You offer him your most innocent smile as a reply.

Alastor inches close enough for you to inhale his scent. He drapes his coat over your shoulders, pulling on the lapels to secure it around your shoulders.

You press your lips on the corner of his mouth. “Thank you.”

Alastor kneels on the ground. He pulls your ankle towards him, sliding off your heel. “That’s all you’re going to say?”

You kiss his cheek. “Was there something else I needed to say?” you ask. “That seemed like a proper response.”

He glides his thumb over the reddened parts of your skin, massaging your foot. “Exactly….It was a proper response,” he tells you. “Aren’t you going to question me? Demand to know if I’m going to kill you?”

“I think what you’re doing is rather obvious.”

Alastor stores your shoes to the side, and leaves your feet hanging out in the air. He circles behind you, hovering close enough to feel his presence, even with the coat. He wraps his hands around the metal chain connected to the swing, and sways you back and forth. “Did you enjoy the restaurant? A co-worker recommended it to me.”

“And in the off chance I don’t, will I be seeing that co-worker lying in the middle of our basement?”

Alastor smiles at you. “That depends,” he says. “Did you enjoy yourself?”

You tilt your head backwards to catch his eyes. “Is this a trick question? Am I supposed to say that nothing can compare to your cooking, or something along those lines?”

Alastor shakes the chains, jerking the swing. “You’re supposed to give me an actual answer,” he says, rolling his eyes. “We can come back if you liked it.”

You lean on Alastor’s leg, using it as a backrest. “Every meal is enjoyable when I am in your company, my love” you say. “But that crab was something else. It looked expensive.…We’re, uh, not suddenly going to become poor, right?”

Alastor stares at you. “I’m going to push you off.”

You wrap your hands around Alastor’s, keeping his hold around the chains firm. “What did I do this time?”

Alastor sighs, and swings you gently. “I can afford nice dinners with you.”

“Just me?”

“Only you.”

Alastor pulls you to your feet. Sand pools around your toes. You pull his coat closer around your shoulders as he drags you closer to the pirate-ship themed deck. He releases his hold on your hand, and your fingers brush against each other.

He walks to the platform. The entrance was made for children, so Alastor has to crawl and duck underneath to access the slide.

You fiddle with the lapels of his coat. “What are you doing?”

Alastor glances back at you, smiling as he crawls underneath the entrance. His ass sticks out when he does. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“If your ass gets stuck,” you begin, crossing your arms, “I’m going to leave you here.”

Alastor rolls his eyes, shimmying further into the entrance. “How lucky then that it’s, apparently, horrendously flat,” he says. “There’s nothing there to get stuck.”

“There’s nothing horrendous about it,” you say with a smile. “I see you’re wearing the pants I like.”

Alastor snorts. “Oh, shut up.”

“Not a chance.” Your smile twists brighter.

Alastor grabs the railing, and pulls himself up. His biceps contract when he does. Sleeve garters and railing are for practical uses, but the only thing echoing through your mind were impractical uses right now. Un-practical but exciting....You need to get it together.

“…Flirting,” Alastor says, pulling your mind from wherever it wandered off to. “Really?”

“That was hardly flirting, dearest.”

Alastor ducks into the slide. His ass lands on the sand, and he curses into the air.  You cough to stifle a laugh.

He hops to his feet, brushing the sand off his pants. His lips twist and his eyebrows furrow as he cringes in pain. “This is a hazard,” he says, glaring at the slide. He turns to you and smiles. “You should try it.”

“How brave of you to risk a shattered tailbone for me,” you say. “But I’m not sliding down that thing when you just called it a hazard.”

“You are an incredibly boring person,” he tells you. “Is it not a fad nowadays to be loose and goofy against these depressing times of economic downfall?”

Your raise your eyebrow.” You want me to crawl up there and slide down in this outfit?”

Alastor leans on the side of the slide. “I don’t see any good reason not to.”

“If you wish to ogle my undergarments, there’s no need to concoct such a scheme,” you say, smiling at him. “You merely need to ask.”

Alastor’s lips twist. “I’m not—”

“Oh, calm down, I’m just pulling your leg,” you say, snorting. “You would need to think of someone besides yourself to do such a thing. So, there’s no need to get your perfect little head into such a fuss.”

“Stop it.”

You smile innocently. “No.”

Alastor walks closer to you. “And you wonder why no one wanted to play with you as a child.”

You take steps to walk closer to him as well, meeting him halfway. “Everyone wanted to play with me,” you say. “I’ll have you know that I was quite the delight.”

You stand before each other, inches apart.

Alastor stares at you. What do those eyes tell him as he watches you stand before him, buried into his coat? He leans closer to you. “I doubt that.”

You take a step closer and slide your arms around him to bury yourself into his hold.

“How rude,” you say with a smile. You look up at him to hold his gaze, propping your chin on his chest. His arms tighten around your back. “I was such a delightful child that I would have played with you, even when no other kid wanted to do so.”

Alastor leans down, pecking your lips. You inch upwards to chase his lips, but self-control takes over. “You are and always will be a nerd,” he says. “You were probably the type to read during the afternoon.”

You tighten your hug on him. “What an incredible assumption to make.”

Alastor places a hand on your head. “Am I wrong?”

“I’m not telling you that,” you say, leaning your head into his chest.

Alastor pulls away from the hug, grabbing your hand to drag you to the monkey bars.

He climbs to the very top, and swings his legs to sit between the bars. He offers his hand, and you take it. His thumb brushes over your fingers and you climb up the steps and onto the bars. It’s difficult to maneuver with such a fancy outfit. Alastor keeps a steady hand on you, and the other goes on your waist as you slide to sit next to him.

The whole playground can be seen from the top of the monkey bars.

“If you weren’t a nerd,” Alastor begins, bumping your shoulder with his, “then you were probably a bully.”

You grip the bar, leaning back to stare. His hair brushes over his eyes. Alastor runs a hand over the strands to push it back. You reach out and push his glasses up his nose. “What makes you say that?”

Alastor boops your nose. “You’re a pretty little thing who works in healthcare. Isn’t there a stereotype for that?”

You blink at him a bit dumbly, cheeks flushed and tingling. Heat trails up your skin, and you have to turn away to hide from his gaze. “You think I’m pretty?” you ask rather idiotically. Deep breaths are needed to calm yourself. “Look…look who’s flirting now.”

Alastor hooks his legs on the bar, and swings backwards. He hangs in the air, the force of his legs the only thing keeping him from falling.

 “Don’t do that,” you say, hissing. “You could break your neck.”

Alastor catches your eye with a wild smile. “I won’t.”

“And I’ll be sure to tell that to my next husband as we’re spending all your money,” you tell him. “Now get down from there before you make me a widow!”

Alastor releases his legs from the bar, and his body smacks on the ground. He lies motionless on the sand.

With a sigh, you carefully climb down the monkey bars. You nudge Alastor’s bicep with your foot when you reach him. “You’re not fooling anyone.”

Silence.

You fold the skirt of your dress, and sit across him. You slam your head onto him, using his chest as a pillow.

“Oof!” Alastor curls into you a bit, eyes twitching. He drapes an arm over your stomach, and draws spirals with his finger.

“I think we could have been friends when we were children,” you say, smiling as you feel the way his chest rises up and down with each breath he takes.

Alastor studies the sky. There are no stars to look at here in the city. It’s covered by the lights and the smog. “We wouldn’t. I probably would have hated you.”

“You—Hate me? Impossible!” you say with a laugh. “You think I’m pretty.”

“Ha. Ha,” he says. “You think you’re so clever.”

You intertwine your fingers with his, tracing the ring on his finger. “Sadly, I think I’ll have to agree,” you say. “I probably would have hated you as well.”

“I’m impossible to hate.”

“I'm sure I, of all people, could find a way,” you say with a smile. “Kids can be mean. And you were probably a really weird one.”

Alastor raises his hand to the air, studying his ring against the dark sky. You do the same. Both rings shimmer in the night. “Yet…,” he starts, “here we are, married.”

“I can’t believe we actually got married.”

“I can.”

“Is this where you’ll tell me all about how you fell in love with me at first sight?” your snort. “That my smile and incredible stitching told you I was the woman you were going to wash dishes with for the rest of your life.”

Alastor laughs and his chest rises and falls. “Well, it wasn't flirting.”

“I did not flirt with you.”

“You did.”

“I didn’t.”

“On our third meeting, you told me we walked to the wrong house, just to spend four hours with me in the rain,” Alastor says, and you see the smile creeping on his lips. “You were so entrapped by my very being that you couldn’t bear to spend another second without me. You looked like you wanted to kis—”

You slam your head down into his chest. “Oh, shut up.”

Alastor glances at you. “Not a chance.”

“Okay then, well I remember two people underneath that umbrella,” you say with a huff. “You accepted my invitation.”

“I did,” he says. “Although, I had the excuse of needing to gather information on such a suspicious person. That was purely professional.”

“And you decided that an additional four hours of walking was necessary,” you say. “You could have stopped entertaining me in the first hour or even the second, but you spent all four hours getting your shoulders wet.”

“I did, indeed.”

Laughter rings into the air. With each and every of Alastor’s laugh, your head bounces up and down. You bury your face deeper into his chest, laughing against it.

“We’ve been married for more than a year,” you say. “How has it been for you?”

“Nothing much has changed, surprisingly,” Alastor says, shrugging his shoulders. “The only thing that’s different is I get to say the most ridiculous thing like how completing it is to be able to just exist with you.”

You take his hand, bringing it closer to your mouth to brush a soft kiss. “There’s nothing ridiculous about it, my love. I enjoy how completing it is to be able to just exist when you are with me,” you say, and Alastor caresses your cheek, trailing the back of his fingers down your skin. “Shall we head home?”

There’s a brightness in Alastor’s eyes when he smiles. “Not yet,” he says. “Let’s stay like this for a moment.”

Maybe the city isn’t so awful. Alastor could ask you to stay in this park forever, and you would happily breathe in the smog. Later, you will have to stand and grab your shoes, and finally head home to prepare for the next day. But that’s later. This is now.

You giggle against his chest. “You think I’m pretty.”

Alastor groans, placing a hand over his eyes.

There will be a lifetime of moments like this waiting for you in a world where you both just exist.

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

1931

The needle pierces through the fabric. You tug on it, pulling the blue thread up and then around to create a simple back stitch. The cat’s outline pieces together. Later, you’ll fill the cloth with grass and flowers, and a little butterfly to give the cat a friend. Should you gift this to Alastor? Well, either way, he’ll find a way to display it around the house sooner or later.

The radio crackles, and music fades into the background.

Soft taps sound on the speaker. “Before I leave for the night,” Alastor’s voice rings from the radio, “I would like to call any attention to any wives out there, especially the one married to me.”

It doesn’t matter that Alastor is all the way at work, miles away, you still roll your eyes at him…but you turn the volume up, listening closely to what he has to say.

“I know my voice can get, oh, so, entrapping,” he says, and you swear you can hear him smile. “Thus, this is a gentle encouragement to complete any tasks you are putting off. For example, you could take out the trash like what was agreed upon.”

You glare at the radio, flicking its wood. “Oh, I hate you,” you mutter. “I hate you so much.”

“Now, now, dearest, we both know that is a lie,” Alastor says. “Don’t wait up!”

The music fades back in, and the broadcast ends for the night.

He likes to think he’s so clever. Let’s see how clever he’ll be when you kill him in his sleep. It will be easy, barely an inconvenience. You’ll drop a pillow right over that handsome face of his, and laugh as he chokes on his own ego.

However,…with a sigh…you take out the trash…like what was agreed upon.

The air is cold at this time of night. The moon looks beautiful tonight, it’s light illuminating the garden. It would be a shame to waste such a breathtaking sight. A part of you wishes to share this with Alastor, that he could be here, right now, and stare at the moon next to you. And the two of you will exist in each other’s company.

You grab the unfinished art piece, and continue on the rocking chair, stitching and listening to the crickets.

It takes hours of stitching and sore fingers, but Alastor’s car finally pulls up the driveway. The engine dies, and he hops out of the car, circling to the trunk and popping it open.

You drop your things, and take a seat on the porch steps to watch him, the moon no longer being the most breathtaking sight.

Alastor’s still wearing his favorite bowtie. It’s too dark to see clearly, but you think he’s pulling out a body from the car’s trunk. He grabs the straps of the obviously filled cadaver bag, letting it drag across the floor.

A good wife would help their husbands carry a very heavy and very dead body. But…if it means being able to sit and stare at your husband hauling a very, very dead person, then maybe, being a good wife is overrated.

Alastor pauses when he sees you, dropping the straps of the cadaver bag. “What are—Is something wrong?”

You smile at the urgency in his voice. “No, not one bit,” you say, leaning on your head on your hand. “Don’t stop on my account.”

“You should be in bed,” he says, crossing his arms. “I told you not to wait for me.”

Your huff, blowing strands of your hair off your face. “Did you? This is the first I’m hearing of this.”

“I did,” Alastor tells you. “Did you not catch tonight’s broadcast?”

“It was a rather busy day. I had things to do, people to see, and all that.”

Even in the dark, you see the way Alastor’s grin widens. He steps towards the garbage bin, opening the lid to check its content. “You are such a horrible liar,” he says, snorting. “I see you got my message.”

Alastor steps into the light.

Part of his hair slicks back. It’s different from its usually neat look. His sleeves are pulled up, folded until his elbow. There are several red stains on him. It’s on his hair, stains his clothes, and paints his face. His eyes have never looked so brown before. How does Alastor manage to make murder…into…into…. You clear your throat a bit, already counting the day until the next time he goes on his hunts.

“Why, hello there, stranger,” you say, not bothering to fight the smile on your lips. “It’s rather cold tonight. Would you mind keeping a lady company?”

Alastor rolls his eyes, brushing back his hair. “I’m a mess.”

“Red’s a great look,” you say. “The seat next to me is empty.”

“Flirting, really?” he says, but he sits next to you. “You’re getting shameless these days.”

You press your lips on his cheek. “For you?” Another kiss. “Always.”

Alastor takes off his coat. The fabric pools around his broad shoulders and down his back before he pulls out his arms. He throws it at your face, smacking you with it. “I hope you don’t go around saying stuff like that to every man you see,” he says, smiling at you. “I might get jealous.”

You peel off his coat from your face, wrapping it around your shoulders. “Only the one married to me,” you tell him. “You should see how I flirt with my husband.”

Alastor props an arm on the steps, leaning back to meet your eyes. “How disappointing to hear you’re married.”

“Don’t be! This current one won’t be alive for very long, so there’s going to be an open spot,” you say, waving your hands. “Are you interested in taking his place? I hope you are—you’re much more handsome than he is.”

Alastor flicks your nose. “Funny.”

You rub your nose a bit. “So…,” you begin, propping your legs across Alastor’s lap, “what is a charming thing like you doing in these woods?”

A strong breeze sways his hair into his eyes. Alastor pushes the strands away, smiling at you like he always does. “What an honor it is to be called charming by you.”

“Oh, not just charming!” you say, clutching your heart as you swoon. “Has anyone ever told you how handsome you are?”

Alastor laughs, and his glasses slide down his nose. You push it up for him. “Not nearly enough,” he says. “Maybe I should take your husband’s open spot, afterall. My wife never compliments me as much as you do.”

He traces circles on the skin of your legs. You give him a little kick for what he said. “Maybe she would say it more if your ego didn’t inflate every time,” you say. “I would go as far as to say she’s doing God’s work by keeping you humble.”

Alastor pushes your legs off his lap.

He reaches into his pocket and takes out his handkerchief. Your eyes catch on the little design embroidered on the fabric. “Since you insist on keeping me here, you should at least help clean me up,” he says, offering the cloth to you. “I would do it myself, but there’s no mirror here.”

“Why clean such a masterpiece?” you say, but accept the handkerchief anyway. “May I?”

Alastor nods, inching close enough for the smell of rusted copper and iron to hit your nose. Intoxicating. It was just plainly and simply…divine. Like a rose that fell straight from heaven’s garden.

You wipe blood off his face. Some of the streaks had already dried. There’s a stubborn spot right on his jaw. You brush the back of your fingers down his cheek, trailing it down until you hook it right under his chin.

How does your face look right now for Alastor to stare at you with wide eyes?

The smudge line of blood that paints his jaw isn’t clearing. It’s too dry. You inch your face closer, brushing your nose on his skin as you inhale the dangerous combination of Alastor mixing with the strong undertones of iron.  Soft exhales land on his skin. Your lips part, giving way to moisten that dried spot with your tongue, trailing it up his jaw.

The hints of metal tingle against your tongue. It was sweet and salty, and it combined with Alastor to create something akin to aged fine wine. But not even the most expensive wine could be as intoxicating as this.

Alastor grabs your face, pulling you to meet his eyes. He squishes your cheeks. “That’s unsanitary!” he says, hissing. “You don’t know what type of bacteria mixed in it.”

You pull your face away from his hold, giving him your most innocent smile.

Hopping to your feet, you circle around the dead body that lies in a very dead position on the ground. You kneel, heart thumping, and pull the zipper down.

“Oh…,” you say, taking in the violence this man experienced, “…wow.”

Alastor was not kind to this man, for this one died screaming.

Alastor leans his arms on his knees, smiling at you. “ I got a little carried away,” he says. “Will you still be able to use him?”

“I think he’ll agree that got more than a little carried away,” you say, snorting as you zip the body back into its bag. “Shall I fetch the bone saw?”

“It’s that bad?”

You walk over to where Alastor sits on the steps, climbing to hover on top of him. The only thing keeping you from crashing down on his chest are the way your hands grip the wood behind him. Inches of space separate your bodies. How far will Alastor entertain you?

You smile down at him, trapping him on the steps between your arms. “I can have this one in pieces by sunrise,” you say, voice barely a whisper. “You can grab the spare, and we can call it a date.”

Alastor tilts his chin up to meet your eyes as he smiles at you. “And tell me,” he begins, voice just as soft as yours. He settles his hands on your waist to steady you above him, “how do you plan on achieving his?”

You trace his shoulder, trailing your fingers up his clavicle bone. “It’s like cutting a chicken,” you say. “All I need to do is take my knife and pound the edge across the joints to disconnect his limbs in one swift motion. Smaller pieces would require the saw.”

Alastor pushes himself upwards, and presses a kiss on your cheek. “And you would spend all night cutting this man for me?”

You hum with delight. “Only for you.”

Alastor tugs your waist, and you come crashing on top of him. You curse as your hands slip, and your face lands on his chest. Alastor hugs you, his laughter ringing in the air, breathy and light and so full of delight. “You are the most ridiculous person to be able to exist with.”

You laugh, accepting how Alastor is the one doing the trapping now. “I’m honored you think so.”

“I think that was the most romantic thing I have ever heard in my life,” he says. “I think I could kiss you right now.”

“Don’t let your wife catch you saying that.” You snake your arms around Alastor’s back, tightening the hug he shares with you. “I hear she gets extremely jealous, and it’s never a smart idea to cross a woman who owns a bone saw.”

Alastor’s back digs into the edges of the porch steps. If your added weight lodges the wood deeper into his back, then he makes no complaints. “That’s truly an idiotic thing to do.”

You press yourself deeper into his hold. It’s quite ridiculous. Hugging you on top of the steps must be uncomfortable, but Alastor does so anyway.

In the end, it’s you who pulls away first, but only to save him from an aching back.

 Grasping the steps, you climb higher and press your lips on his forehead. You take the seat next to him. Alastor reaches for you, adjusting his coat around your shoulders to secure you from the night’s cold breeze.

“Bad day at work?” you say, leaning your head on his shoulder.

Alastor leans his head on top of yours. “I’m better now.”

You press deeper into him, laughing against his dress shirt. It’s stained with blood, but you don’t mind. “So, tell me, who is this unfortunate fellow that was on the receiving end of your stress,” you say. “And should I be jealous?”

“I don’t know if I should answer that—Do you happen to own a bone saw?”

You swat his arm, rolling your eyes as you do.

Alastor presses his body closer against yours. “I would love to hear you guess.”

“Hmmm….Well, this is Larry, and he comes from humble beginnings,” you tell him. “He’s a self-made man who met this pretty little thing.”

Alastor takes your hand, thumbing the ring on your finger. “You’re getting better at this.”

There are too many stains on Alastor’s shirt. It’s beyond saving. You’ll have to burn his whole outfit. “Larry met this most darling belle. They were happy until tragedy struck.”

Alastor pulls off his gloves, intertwining his bare fingers with yours. “I do love a tragedy.”

“They fell in love.”

“That’s not tragic,” he says, snorting.

“Then you are a fool, dearest. Love can kill in a way no one has ever been able to describe. Not even the greatest poets can describe the true depths of loss,” you tell him, squeezing his hand. “Homes have been burned in its name.”

Alastor kisses your cheek. “And how did Larry suffer?”

“His darling got taken away from him, in more ways than one,” you say. “Even on her deathbed, she could not recognize him.”

Alastor clutches his heart. “How truly heartbreak!”

You glance up at Alastor. He’s looking at the moon. “Yet, here you are smiling.”

“That’s because you are the most fantastic story teller.”

You pull away to stand, and your fingers brush as it slips out of his.

The porch stairs creak with every step. You reach for the radio on the windowsill, turning the knob until a faint click. Alastor’s lips twist when you change his pre-set station for softer melodies. That man and his radios—Always so particular.

You offer a hand to Alastor, giving him a small bow. “Dance with me?”

“I’m not exactly dressed for the occasion,” Alastor tells you, yet he takes your hand in his.

“There’s no need to worry about such trifling things,” you say. “I think you look divine, like a rose straight from heaven made just for me.”

Alastor wraps his hand around your own, and settles the other on your waist. Dancing can barely describe what you’re doing, not when the both of you only had the energy to sway to the music. But nevertheless, Alastor takes the lead on this dance.

He raises his arm, twirling you underneath. Your eyes lock together when you face him. “Hi.”

You smile at him. “Hi.”

“I’ve been wondering…How did you know work was stressing me?” he says, as you dance to the radio’s music. “Why say work specifically?”

You tilt your head, motioning to the window behind you. “That radio over there,” you say. “The one you keep by your chair. You were listening to it this morning when I gave you coffee.”

You hum the lyrics of the song that plays on the radio. It’s quite nice. Maybe you’ll ask Alastor to play it during his broadcast as a dedication to you. But knowing him, he’ll take this opportunity to become a nuisance made for you, and find something to poke fun about.

His eyebrows furrow. “I don’t understand.”

“You listen to that specific radio when you’re happy,” you say. Those brown eyes of his shift to you. In your most humble opinion, they shine brighter than the stars. “You were fine when you left but somewhere between leaving and coming home to me, your mood turned sour.”

Alastor presses a kiss on your fingers, brushing his lips over your skin with each word. “I would love to hear more about this.”

“The one in the kitchen, that’s for when you’re tired,” you say, chuckling. “The one in the office is for when you’re bored. You listen to the one on our nightstand when you’re thinking or upset.”

“Then what about the radio in the basement?” he asks with a smile that could rival the moon. “Tell me when I listen to that one.”

“That one is for me. You leave it there so I have something to keep me company,” you say. “The saxophone, on the other hand, is for when you’re frustrated.”

“And now, you’re just a master of what I’m feeling.”

“Not at all,” you say with a shrug. “I don’t know how you feel right now.”

Alastor inches closer, leaning down to meet your eyes. “Would you like to know?”

“Sure.”

Alastor places a hand on your cheek, caressing you with his thumb. You lean into how gently he traces your face. He leans closer, nudging his nose against your own. Alastor brushes his lips over you, and the cracks on his lip prick you. Why he decided to torture you with soft touches and hovering inches away exceeds your understanding.

The strong scent of copper and iron on his skin intoxicate every molecule that makes up your body. He’s unfair. Too unfair of him to hold such power over you. Alastor would love to know how he makes your skin buzz with each and every glance of those too brown eyes that shine brighter than starlight. This is a fact you will take to your grave.

Your eyes flutter to a close. Alastor decides to show you mercy, finally kissing your lips.

Open!

The demand drums across your mind.

Your eyelids stay shut as you kiss him back. The need to look at Alastor’s too brown eyes shout at you. What face is Alastor making right now? How does he look? What do those eyes see?

But he kisses you gently. Oh…so…gently. Alastor kisses you like he had something to say. There are words being whispered across your skin as your lips move together. His thumb brushes your skin, and you can’t open your eyes.

Kissing him makes you wish you spent your youth studying poems and soft metaphors instead of the role of hexokinase in turning Glucose into Glucose-6-phosphate. This wish comes suddenly and out of nowhere. Not once have you ever wished for a different pursuit. But you would forfeit all your knowledge to be able to describe the way Alastor’s lips strike you to your very soul.

That thought disappears quickly, mind too preoccupied with the overwhelming sensation of soft lips placing kiss after kiss. The arm around your waist pulls you close, your body pressing against his own as if it was the most natural thing to place you there, as if the Seraphim creating your bodies carved you to belong.

Alastor pulls away with a soft smile.

It takes every ounce of your self-control not to chase after his lips and pull him back to you. Heat flushes your face. You can’t find the strength to open your eyes, not with how much he makes your cheeks tingle.

“You’ve been observing me.” Alastor brushes your eyelids with his thumb. “Open your eyes.”

Your eyes flutter, heeding to his demand. There it is, your favorite sight looking straight at you, holding a beauty that the moon cannot compete against—his eyes. “Hi.”

Alastor’s smile widens. “Hi.”

There are words that bubble on your lips. Words that are begging to be said. Three words that could very well make this man run when he understands just how deep those words mean for him.

And there it is again, that wish to become a poet because those three words can never truly describe what is imprinted on your soul’s very essence. Those three words are not enough for a man who deserves poems full of soft metaphors and sweet analogies.

“That’s because I…I…,” you trail off, hiding your face in his chest. “I think that’s just called marriage, and I always was weak to such radiant beauty.”

Coward…You are a coward.

That’s okay.

You don’t mind the word being shouted to you by your heart, not when it means you can guard it with walls.

It’s okay to be a coward, because it means there will always be a tomorrow. There will always be another chance, another moment, another day to be brave. Another tomorrow. Another next week. Another next month. Another next year.

There’s no need to tell Alastor the word your soul desperately wants him to understand. Not right now, at least.

Not when the evidence is already there: You and him.

There will be a lifetime of moments like this waiting for you in a world where you are his.

Next Part: |Glimpse of Me and You: Part 2| Don't be shy to talk to me. I don't bite at all! I would love to hear your thoughts on the chapter. And all comments really motivate me to work <3. 1932 will be posted in a few days. 1933 on the other hand….Well, let’s just say that such a grand year needs its own chapter. As I was writing this, I kept going back to the idea that Reader can flirt, but can't handle being flirted back. It was too funny not to add. And like I swear heart appears in my eyes, as well as Reaader's eyes everytime Alastor does anything just slightly unhinged. That too was too funny not to add. Taglist: @mybrainautocorrect @ray-rook @teavibesaf @valentique @qardasngan @alastorssimp @aestheticgals-blog @slaggylemon @reikamasama @obessivlyonline @okay-babe @lyralibra @holymusicalmothman @amoraneuro @tobyisher3

[writersblog20]

Comfort person

Pedro Pascal x reader

Summary: Today was not a good day, completely the opposite actually but yet in all your horrible days, Pedro seemed to stick by your side, not helping the case with your on going crush on the daddy of the internet but when nightmares took over your night, you saw no other option than to knock on Pedro’s door for comfort.

Warnings: mention of death of a loved one (godfather in this case), mention of sleeping pills, mention of anxiety, mention of a panic attack, nightmares, You being the rock of the family, heated kiss and a lot of fluff

Words: 3,4K

A/N: repost because Tumblr decided to be a little bitch and test my last goddamn nerve💀

Comfort person

You and Pedro became close friends when you met at a friends party. You both hit it off great and well you had a crush at the older man before you even met him but now…. God you were completely in love and there was no stopping it. Never ever, did you think Pedro liked you back in that same way. I mean, he was a bit older, had more experience in well, everything in live and you didn’t. Yeah you had an old soul and been through a whole lot of shit which made you mentally, a bit older and you’ve never really acted your age but still.

Pedro was shooting the last of us and stayed over at your place since it was closer to work and he didn’t have to stay in a hotel. You didn’t have to think twice when you offered up a room in your cozy, little home but you did not thought this through. You were seeing Pedro a lot, obviously but that didn’t help your case called: Being utterly in love with the daddy of the internet. For the love of god why did you think this was going to be a good idea?

Today was a tough day. Well make it a though 3 weeks at this point because what the fuck?! You had trouble with your teacher, exams, and a whole lot of last minute changes because your teachers couldn’t communicate and a whole lot more but you get the deal. You were stressed, frustrated and exhausted and to top it all off, today marked the 2 year anniversary of your godfathers dead. You never had a father but when he became your godfather, he tried to fix everything your father had ruined and broken. He was the closest thing you had to a father and now he was gone. He had spent 2 years being your godfather and you whished you had more time with him.

So you came home from your studies, Pedro in the kitchen getting dinner ready when you walked in. He looked at you and the moment he saw you, a big smile appeared on his face. “Hey sweetheart” Pedro greeted you with a lot of joy but could see that you were going through a rough day. He opened his arms up for you and pulled you in a hug, which you gladly accepted, wrapping your arms around his waist, holding his pink sweater tightly while your rested your head against his chest. Pedro placed his hand on your head for comfort and pulled you closer to his body as he placed a kiss on your head.

“Tough day huh?” he murmured in your hair, making you nod. “You’re here now sweetheart. This day is almost over and in two days, you have a break and we’ll only do fun things and rest. I promise you.” you felt comforted by Pedro’s words as usual. Pedro always was able to comfort you like no one else could. Like everything would be okay as long as he was around. Pedro let you hold him as long as you needed to. You could feel him move while you clanged to him. You heard some glasses clink together and you assumed he was opening up a wine bottle.

One arm was still around you, holding you against his body and the other was trying to pour the wine in the glasses. You chuckled a little at the struggle Pedro was having with the wine while he didn’t want to let go off you. You got out of the hug making Pedro frown a bit but smiled while he saw you chuckle.

He handed you the wine glass with a generous amount of wine in it. “I have to go to my family tonight.” You mentioned and Pedro leaned against the kitchen counter with a sad look in his eyes. “I’ll go with you, sweetheart.” You felt your heart fill up with love and comfort but shook your head. “You don’t have to do that P.” this time it was Pedro’s turn to shake his head. “No, I want to. I want to be there for you. You don’t have to do this alone anymore.” He told you and pushed his body off the counter and walked to you as he wrapped his arms around you again. “Thank you, P.” Pedro kissed your head in response.

~Time skip~

After dinner you quickly changed and went with Pedro to your family. You knew that it was going to be tough because your godmother had a very tough time and you promised your godfather that if the time would come that you would take care of them. You just didn’t know the time would come so soon but you kept your promise to him. So you straightened your back, took a deep breath, pushed your emotions aside for a moment and walked in. It wasn’t the first time that your godmother broke down in front of you and her daughter. It was tough because you felt torn apart by the pain but you promised to be strong for them. To be that shoulder and rock but it was tough. So today was no difference. Pedro watched you bubble up all the emotions while your godmother clang to you.

Pedro could feel the weight on your shoulders and the pain in your heart as it chocked him up. He could see the tears gathering in your eyes but being pushed away so you could be the strong one of the family.

Once you were in the car, it was silent. Pedro didn’t know what to say so he just held your hand while he drove off. You were always quite after something like this. IT just drained all your energy and you felt shitty as fuck to say the least. You couldn’t wait to get home, take a sleeping pill, relax and go to bed early so you wouldn’t have to deal with this day anymore.

You and Pedro walked through the front door and you made your way in the kitchen to make some tea and take your meds. Pedro followed behind you softly. “Thank you for coming with me P.” Pedro smiled softly but sadness lingered over his features. “Always sweetheart.” Pedro slowly walked up to you and pulled you in a hug. “Let me take care of you how you took care of them now. You did great but it’s okay now. You don’t have to be strong anymore princess.” You were too exhausted to even cry while the weight on your heart grew stronger. “it’s not healthy bubbling it up like this, mi amada”

“I know. I’m just exhausted right now.” You told him tiredly. Pedro cupped your cheeks lovingly and looked at you. Softness glazed over his eyes and features. “I can imagine sweetheart.” He told you before placing a long, lingering kiss on your forehead. You let out a sigh. “Can we watch a movie?” you asked Pedro who smiled lovingly at you. “We can do whatever you want to, mi corazon.”

Pedro made the tea while you took your meds. You quickly run upstairs to get in the most comfortable outfit ever. You had a very, like very big fluffy sweater type thing and it was great to hide in it, so it was perfect for now. You walked downstairs, seeing Pedro already on the couch. Pedro smiled as he saw you in the fluffy sweater. A look like his heart was going to burst from cuteness.

You plopped on the couch next to Pedro, who had his arm resting on the leaning of the couch so you leaned as close against Pedro’s side. He handed you the remote and you chose a movie. Pedro went with his fingertips over your sculp, comforting you. As time went by, you leaned more and more against Pedro before deciding to rest your head on his lap. Pedro’s attention went to you as you got away from his side. He looked at what you were planning to do and the moment he saw you laying down on his lap, his heart filled itself with so much love that he thought he was going to lose it. He grabbed a blanket that was behind him and placed it over your body. His hand resting on your arm and softly rubbed your arm while the other was still in your hair, massaging your scalp.

You didn’t remember when your eyes closed but you woke up by the slight shift from Pedro. You opened your eyes and saw that Pedro was looking at you. “I’m sorry I woke you up princess. I wasn’t sure if you were sleeping or not.” Pedro told you softly as he went over your hair. You let out a groan as you sat up, your neck and back hurting.

Pedro’s hand was on your back softly rubbing it. “It’s okay, I should go to bed anyways.” You told him with a tired smile. Pedro kissed the top of your head. “Goodnight sweetheart. And you know it! if there’s something, anything at all, you come to me and wake me up alright mama?” he told you a bit stern but still with love. You smiled at his caring side that you loved so much and not to forget about the nickname. “I promise. Goodnight P.” you told him as you stood up. “Goodnight princessa.”

You got upstairs and freshened up. You wore some shorts, a shirt from Pedro that you might’ve stolen or not and laid down in bed You scrolled a bit through your phone, watching some Youtube videos and just like before, you didn’t know when your eyes closed as you fell into a deep sleep.

Pedro tried to walk silently upstairs until he saw some light from underneath your door. He frowned a bit, worried that you couldn’t sleep or that you felt bad after today so he softly knocked on your door but didn’t hear a response from you. So he tried again “Sweetheart? You up?” he asked you but not too hard for if you were in fact asleep, that you wouldn’t wake up. Pedro carefully opened your door slightly and peeked inside, seeing you completely knocked out with your headphones in, Youtube still playing in the background and your lamp besides your bed table still on. He smiled lovingly and walked inside of your room, very carefully taking your headphones out of your ears and placed them on the bedtable. He took your phone and put it in the charger besides your earphones. He got the covers, pulling them up a bit and softly tucked you in. He kissed your head and put your light out and silently walked out of your room, closing the door carefully behind him.

~time skip~

You woke up, half in a panic as you looked around you confused. You had a terrible, really horrible nightmare. You didn’t remember putting your nightlight out or putting your phone away etc. It clicked in your head that it must’ve been Pedro, making you smile in yourself. You really wanted to go to him and let him hold you, protect you from anymore nightmares if they’d come back. You felt your heart thumping against your chest as you fell back down with a sigh as you rubbed your face. You stared at your ceiling until you had enough and got out of bed. Your muscles ached, probably from tensing them so much in your sleep.

You groaned, getting up. All of a sudden, fear and anxiety started engulfing you and before there could be a panic attack, you quickly exited your room. Your feet softly shuffling at your wooden floor as you got closer to Pedro’s door. You know what he said but still something inside of you, really did not want to wake him up but you knew that if you didn’t, you would have a full blown panic attack. Besides, Pedro would whoop your ass if he found out and that you didn’t wake him. You softly knocked on his door and unknowingly held your breath. You didn’t hear anything and you didn’t really know what to do so you carefully opened the door.

Pedro laid on his side with his back to the door. “P?” you whispered as not to startle him but loud enough to wake you. He stirred a bit in his sleep and turned on his other side, now facing you but didn’t fully wake up so you tried again. “P?” but still no reaction. You shifted on your feet, getting nervous and not knowing what to do next. You looked at the empty side of the bed. Fuck it, you cursed out in your head and softly walked to the empty side of the bed.

You held out the covers slightly and got in next to him. Pedro opened his eyes from the sudden movement on his bed. He saw that you were wearing his shirt and he got a grin on his face. “I was looking for that shirt.” Pedro said, his voice raspy from sleep. You quickly looked at Pedro. “I’m sorry.” You said sheepishly, seeing the smirk on Pedro’s face, made you feel flustered yet relieved that he found it amusing. You laid down on your side, facing Pedro. You both stared at each other for a moment.

“You okay?” he asked you in a whisper. The love that coated those two words and his big brown cow eyes made your heart skip a couple of beats. “Had a bad nightmare.” Pedro nodded and gave you a sad smile. “I’m glad you came to me.” you felt flustered and shy but proudness also washed over you while you couldn’t do anything to hide the shy smile that covered your face. “Come here sweetheart.” He told you and opened the covers more so you could move towards him, which you gladly did. Your body was tightly against his, your arm tucked underneath your chin, like those dinosaur hands while Pedro’s arms were tightly wrapped around you. Your head was tucked underneath his chin and for the first time, in like forever you felt genuinely safe and secure.

You held the shirt that he was wearing, tightly in your hands, making a fist. The way Pedro’s hands softly rubbed your back and held your head, made the butterflies multiple in your stomach. “Try to get some more sleep, mi corazol. I’ll be right here.” He whispered in your ear. You already had your eyes closed, completely relaxing underneath his touch. You moved a bit, trying to get even closer to Pedro. You listened to his heartbeat and heard it thumping violently against his chest. You slowly opened your eyes and looked up at Pedro, making him look at you as well.

“What’s wrong sweetheart?” he finally asked when he saw your awaiting look, making him confused. His eyebrows knitted a bit together, trying to read your mind. You shook your head softly and wanted to rest your head again but Pedro put his finger underneath your chin, making you look up at him. “You know you can tell me right?” he asked you softly again. You nodded and played with his shirt that he wore. “It’s just, your heart is beating very fast.” You tried to say as softly as you could, hoping that he didn’t hear you but he did.

Pedro chuckled nervously. “Eh yeah… You kind off have that effect on me…” this time his voice was in a whisper. You looked up real quick and you felt his heart absolutely going insane underneath your touch. You were so starstruck, your body moving on its own right now. You got his hand and placed it on your shirt, exactly where your heart was. It was beating just as fast as his, if not faster. His hand was flat on your chest with your hand above his and now you saw how big his hand was. “You kinda have that effect on me as well.” you whispered, scared that if you spoke too loud that you would break the intimate moment.

Pedro’s hand that rested on your chest slowly went up to your neck, towards your cheek, letting it rest there. His thumb softly rubbing on your soft skin. “Are you sure?” he asked you, not sure if you were on the same page. “Very much so.” Pedro softly nodded and lowered his head so he could rest his forehead against yours. Both of your breaths shaky right now from the close proximity. You placed your hand on his again and held it, bringing it to your lips, softly kissing his hand. Pedro was in a complete trance, completely focused on you and his hand.

You let go of his hand and went through his bed hair and let your hand rest on his cheek, your palm tickling from his stubbles. Pedro’s eyes big, intently looking at you before he rested his forehead against yours again. He carefully wrapped his hand around your wrist that still cupped his cheek. You heard Pedro let out a shaky breath “Fuck” he cursed out and placed his lips against yours. You knew it was going to happen sooner or later but it still took you by surprise. Your heart almost beating out of your chest when you felt his tongue against your lips.

Both of your breath still shaky as you let him take control. He rolled you on your back and carefully laid his weight down on you as he continued kissing you. Your hands went though his hair, tucking it a bit. Pedro rested his hand on your hip and the other on your cheek again. You took his shirt in your hand again and pulled him more down on you. The kiss started to slow down and Pedro pecked your lips before pulling back, his thumb softly rubbing on your cheek. “I really do like you, mi amor.” He told you as you looked into each other’s eyes. This time you wrapped your small hand around his wrist. You turned your head towards his hand and softly placed a kiss on his wrist. “I really, really like you too P. I’m… I’m actually in love with you.” you admitted, feeling completely flustered, shy and nervous.

Pedro got a wide smile. “Good, cause I am too.” He told you and kissed you again passionately. You felt Pedro sigh in the kiss and so did you. He broke away again before it could get too heated. Not that he didn’t want to, but everything on its own time and god did he wanted to take his time with you.

Pedro kissed your nose, cheek and forehead before he laid down on his back. You scooped closer to him when he held out his arm for you to lay in. Nothing else was said, it wasn’t necessary either as you just cuddled with each other. Pedro kept cuddling you until you finally fell into a peaceful sleep. He made sure that you fell asleep first before he would even think about closing his own. But he didn’t want to sleep, he just wanted to stay in this exact moment and watch over you but he was bound to lose that fight eventually and he fell asleep, just like you in a peaceful sleep.

There was only one reason why you finally fell asleep peacefully and that was because of Pedro. No one, ever had made you feel this safe and secure in your entire life. Not even your mom was able to do so but Pedro…? He just did it, he had that effect on you and that’s how you knew he was the one.

[remuslupinbutcooler]

Puppy love…

(lost boys x reader )

i apologise for the late chapter , i’ve currently got exams going on !!

Hunger. Every part of you craved it. Something you’d never had before. Something you never ate.

The boys had taken you out , promising to show you your new life and how to adjust to it. Marko and Paul making small remarks while David snapped at them for it, still angry about your reaction to your new life You weren’t angry at him, moreover the fact he’d take it without asking. If he had perhaps asked nicely, you might’ve or maybe if one of the other brought it up or even Star. You would’ve definitely said yes.But he wanted you, he didn’t want to loose his and his brothers mate. He’d finally found you after years of hoping and wondering.

He taught you how to make your first kill, you were hesitant at first . Worried about someone finding out, it was a surfer that you killed. A blonde haired prick who’s tanned and tone body now lay coldly along the shore , covered in the darkest reds and buried beneath layers of warm sand. The waves would probably take him away , the fish and other creatures would make good use of him.

“So now what ?” You titled your head to the side, almost puppy like. A curious golden glint dancing among your eyes, it still stood there even after feeding.

“What do you mean now what? We’re going home babe.” Paul’s arm hung around you.

“What? No new vampire wardrobe? “ You were pouting, your eyes now becoming puppy dog like .

“Maybe another day ? Hm? It’s getting late..the suns coming up and I’d rather you didn’t die on your first night as a vampire “ David’s fingers reached for your chin, pulling it face him. He was close. Closer than you wanted him to be . His lips soon clashed against your forehead before he pushed you back into the boys.

He rode off first. Leaving a couple of minutes before Dwayne followed behind. Dwayne didn’t really speak to you, his eyes seemed somewhat saddened by the events. While the rest of the boys cheered you on for killing, he didn’t . He stood there watching before cleaning you up.

“Does he not like me or something?”

“No no no babe he does..He’s just got something going on..!” Paul was quick to answer. His eyes meeting with the floor. He was lying.

“Hop on!” Marko commanded before you could comment on Paul’s behaviour.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You stared back at your bed, the boys had left and gone to their rooms. Leaving you alone.

You tossed and turned before meeting with the all too familiar feeling of another presence.

Marko stood before you, a thumb stuck in his mouth. Stood almost like a small child , he looked like a small child. His hair all messy, his clothes baggy drowning him and his eyes, innocent and wonderous.

“Could..Could I possibly sleep with you? I…I..” Before he could say anything, your arms wrapped around his frame pulling him into the bed . His arms pushed almost into him, he lay comfortably on his back letting you adjust around him. One hand placed on your thigh while the other on the pillow beneath your head. You were comfortable like this.

“any reason you wanted to sleep here or?”

“I was worried. First night as a vampire and in a strange place, it’s gotta feel weird for you mamas..” He sighed before letting his fingers move against your thigh “ I had Paul and stuff but David said it’s best if we all just let you come to us but it’s so-“

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why does David think it’s best? shouldnt i get to decide? he literally-“

“hey hey hey..” small tears appeared within your eyes , it’s only just hit you that you were now dead. A creature of the night, a monster. Marko pulled you closer to him, letting you cling onto him and cry.

Soon your tears had ended and left you tired, too tired to even tell Marko that you were going to sleep. He sensed your now sleepy mind and eased it even more by cuddling upto you and keeping you comfortable.

Maybe being here wasn’t so bad…

[kkskdeaddove]

KakaSaku Dead Dove Week Wrap-Up!

We had 16 stunning and deliciously dark written submissions for the inaugural KakaSaku Dead Dove week and 2 breathtaking, mind-altering art submissions.

Please read the tags before checking out the full works. If something is going to make you uncomfortable, don't read it. You are responsible for curating your own fanfiction experience!

Thank you to everyone who participated, encouraged, commented, read, kudosed, and cheered on our amazing creators! Looking forward to future kksk dd events 🖤

Without further ado, here is the wrap-up!

appreciation by Anonymous 

The one where the Land of Waves arc goes badly, but Momochi Zabuza's soft-spot for child-tools doesn't stop him from doing what has to be done.

The Hatake Heir by BelleDayNight

As the sole heir of the Hatake clan, Kakashi has known since he was five years old that he would marry the daughter of the Harunos. Sakura on the other hand is blissfully unaware that the man that will one day be her sensei is in fact her betrothed. There's a reason no man asks Sakura out on a date-- her husband has been quietly scaring them off for years...

Not a Love Like Mine, a Ruin by stargliders

Their captor hummed in contemplation. "This is my show, and whatever I say goes. I think I’ll start by shutting that smart mouth of yours for good." Kakashi closed his eyes, letting out a slow breath. "Take me instead." "But you…you can’t," Sakura said. The words she desperately wanted to tell him refused to come out. (I love you. Please, don’t die.)

take me down (won't you take me down) by xylazine

In a moment of reckless bravery, Sakura volunteers to be taken by none other than the demon of Konoha. Little does she realize how much she's in for.

Please, Please, Please (Let Me Get What I Want) by twofortea

Kakashi-sensei looked so different when he was sleeping.

Consequences by gremlint

Kakashi fucked around, and now he's going to find out. Or: the consequences of neglecting a brat's aftercare.

Hold On Tight by Typhlobasia

Konoha’s Official Exam for Head Interrogators, part two: required practical section, Combined Test of Shinobi Mental Perseverance. This is something Sakura knows she wants to pass for her team; she can persevere, can earn her title, do her part protecting the village, make Lady Tsunade proud for all the efforts she invested into her student over the years… But, seeing her moon-lit reflection in the hitai-ate on Kakashi’s forehead, her friend and former sensei towering over her as she is strapped into the interrogation chair, Sakura’s old fears slither their way back in. “So, Sakura…” Her eyes snap to his, hopeful. Pleading. Kakashi takes a small step forward on the stone floor, the sound of it sharp and echoing in the dim room, “shall we begin?”

Wolf in Scarecrow's Clothing by Fusionblitz28

In which Yamanaka Ino doesn't protect Sakura from bullies and becomes her first friend. Nor does Sakura obsessively crush over Uchiha Sasuke. Rather, her ANBU in shining armor and crush are one in the same person. Eventually the polish fades to reveal something rather unlike its original condition. Maybe it's always been that way and Sakura was too naive to see it sooner. OR; Sakura falls in love at five years old. With none other than one Hatake Kakashi. Kakashi exploits that.

La Petite Mort by rosebrided

“I love you, Sakura,” he whispers like she can hear him even now, the words coming out in a wisp of a breath. And then he adds, “Forgive me.” - In which Sakura is gone from this life, and Kakashi struggles to cope after discovering her body.

That Shattered Soul by twofortea

The bright green of her eyes had dulled, her expression made vacant. She was like a broken doll, a preview of what Sasori planned to turn her into.

cat nap by xylazine 

Curled around his pink kitten, Kakashi the cat slips into a rather person like dream.

breathe me by twofortea 

Every time the nightmares started up again, he found someone new to bury himself in. He lost himself in another person, another nameless face, another warm body—buried the nightmares in warmth, life, lust.

On The Brink by gremlint

Kakashi and Sakura have the unfortunate luck to be captured by some rather imaginative enemies. What they experience will change their relationship forever.

Dancing With a Ghost by stargliders

There was nothing else they could do. The talk therapy had failed. So had both rounds of electroshock. (The lightning Kakashi wielded all these years—had it made him immune? Even as Sakura watched his toes and fingers rattle against the table?) But a doctor in Kirigakure, Shizune explained, had recently invented a procedure that settled the overactive zones in the frontal lobes of the brain. Maybe, just maybe, he could be happy again.

Living-Dead by Komorebi_3

Obito Uchiha decides to send a clone to the 5 Kage summit and observe Naruto and Kakashi in the shadows after revealing information about Itachi and Sasuke. He finds himself a bit bored with the turn of events until a certain pink-haired Kunoichi strolls in confessing her love to Naruto. Everything about her reminds him of Rin and his already fragile state of mind just spirals out of control from there. Or, Obito becomes partially delusional and kidnaps Sakura for his own sick pleasure, but of course Kakashi Hatake can't let that happen so he volunteers to be taken instead.

No Good Deed by Heartensoul

Kakashi had given Sasuke so many chances to make it right—to do right by Sakura. Now, he was going to take matters into his own hands.

compulsion by xylazine

Kakashi has driven her mad with need for years until Sakura finally snaps and takes matters into her own hands.

Clone bang art by @spnfox

Captured by enemies art by @spnfox

Thank you all again! See you next time 😈😈😈

[literatecowboy]

Dr. Feelgood

3. Physical Exams

Part 4

Start at part 1 here!

Summary: You've been in trouble at work several times before for "lack of professionalism" but now you've gone too far. You've been reassigned to Task Force 141 as a temporary doctor to replace the ones they've made quit out of frustration. You must either prove yourself and earn your former position back at a prestigious military hospital in California or face dishonorable discharge. Author's Notes: This is my first fanfiction - please be gentle. Additionally, the reader's callsign is "Feelgood." I have done my best to write the reader as ambiguous regarding appearance, but she/her pronouns and AFAB anatomy will be utilized. I hope for this to be a slow-burn romance with Simon "Ghost" Riley.  Warnings: Gunshot wounds, medical terminology and procedures, finger up the butt, touching, allusions to NSFW

-----

Ghost lay alone in the medical bay, thoughts racing through his foggy mind. For once, he’d gotten Feelgood to shut the fuck up and leave him alone. After his flirtation you’d squeaked, snarky reply dead on your lips, and made an excuse to leave before bustling out, the door slamming behind you. 

You were infuriating. The way you bossed his colleagues around as if you had some sort of authority over them, the ways you tried to control him by cornering him and forcing him into bed, allegedly “for his own good.” The softness of your skin against his as you held him while he collapsed during his panic attack. The way he wished he could shut your smart mouth up with your plush lips wrapped around his–

The door to the med bay swung open and pulled him from his thoughts. Gaz poked his head in and glanced around, raising an eyebrow at Ghost.

“Where’s Feelgood?” he asked, wandering into the room with Soap trailing behind him. 

“Left.” Ghost grunted, shrugging his shoulders and scowling under his balaclava. 

“Where to? Price was asking after her and I think she has some questions for him too,” he said, peering into the office through the window in the door. 

“Didn’t ask.” the masked man grumbled. 

“How you feelin’ L.T. - seems like the lass is doin’ a lovely job,” Soap remarked, plopping down in a chair at his lieutenant’s side. 

“She’s competent.” Ghost said. What he wanted to say was ‘She’s a feisty little thing. I quite like her.’

“She’s scarier than you, mate. If I ever get shot, promise you’ll protect my arsehole?” Soap asked, snickering. Ghost fixed him with a glare. 

“Bring that up ever again, sergeant, and you’re a dead man,” he growled lowly. 

“Bring what up again?” you called out as you strode back into the med bay, a tray piled high with food in your arms. 

“Got you something to eat from the mess, Lieutenant,” you said with a smile, setting the tray by his bedside. 

“Hey, Feelgood, Price was askin’ after you earlier. Said you should head down to the office when you get a minute.” Gaz said, coming out of your office and offering you a smile. You returned it. 

“Thanks! I need to ask him about hiring medical support staff for this place. I’m sure you guys would be happy with more than just me poking at you all the time.”

“Hey lass, what does Feelgood mean? Where’d you get the callsign?” Soap asked, leaning back in his seat. 

“Oh, it’s stupid. Do you like classic rock?” you asked with a laugh, sitting down and sweeping your hair back into a ponytail. 

“I know enough to know Dr. Feelgood is the title of a song - Motley Crue, right?” Gaz asked, sitting next to you. 

“Yeah! I got it when I was still doing fieldwork and running missions with soldiers on the ground as a medic in the marines. One day three of us are headed into some little village and we get hit by an IED and the Humvee we’re in flips. So I crawl out, and my guys are still alive but they’re fucked up pretty bad. 

“My buddy Marston’s lost an arm so I tourniquet it and pump him full of drugs and he starts feeling good again before he passes the fuck out. And I figured fuck, why stop there? We’re all fucked up and bloody and we might die here in the sand so why not go out feeling better than just comfortable? So I offered some to Duncan after I’ve finished bandaging him up and he was like, ‘Sure, why the fuck not?’

“Then I patch myself up and put the needle in my thigh. Next thing I know I’m waking up driving a little donkey cart down the road and there are evac vehicles coming towards us. Marston’s passed out in the back and Duncan’s singing something made up - I think pretending to be the radio. 

“Anyway, I got into a metric fuckton of trouble even though we all made it out alive. I fucked my shoulder badly in the wreck, too bad to keep doing fieldwork, so they shipped me off to work in the base hospital’s emergency department. I got my shit together and went to medical school after that. 

“But the name - when my buddies came around enough to joke about it with me, they started calling me Dr. Feelgood after the song. See, it’s about a drug dealer called Jimmy who manages to evade trouble for a long time, but at the end of the song, he finally goes down on charges. They kinda reckoned my story mirrored Jimmy’s, but instead of going to prison, I got reprimanded and put in a more boring environment.” You finished. 

“Steamin’ Jesus lass, that’s–”

“I wasn’t aware you did field missions.” Ghost’s voice cut through Soap’s, silencing him. You smiled thinly. 

“Used to. Now the closest I get is coming with evac to stabilize wounded soldiers before they reach a proper hospital,” you admitted. 

“Sorry, Feelgood, but that’s pretty funny,” Gaz said with a grin, patting your knee before standing. 

“I just feel bad for whoever’s cart that was,” you admitted with a laugh, making Gaz shake his head. 

—

You went to see Price not long after the conversation died down under the assurances that Gaz and Soap would watch over Ghost. The door to his office was shut so you knocked softly. 

“Come in!” he called. You stepped in, taking in framed pictures and documents lining the back wall. A little plant sat atop the sill of the little window on the left wall and a couch was leaned against the right wall. 

“You wanted to see me?” you asked, slipping inside, the door shutting behind you.

“Yes! I wanted to let you know that I’ll be going on a mission with Soap and Gaz in a few days. It won’t last more than a week, but I wanted to check in with you and ask your professional opinion about Ghost’s condition before we leave. How’s he healing?” he asked, closing the laptop on his desk and fixing his gaze on you as you sat down. 

“Ghost is healing remarkably quickly and I’m confident he’ll make a full recovery provided he follows my instructions. Whether or not he does that is a matter of question,” you admitted with a smile. 

“Ah, I understand. I also wanted to ask - do you have any other concerns about the medical bay? Are there any supplies you’d like me to request for you, are we running low on anything?” Price asked. 

“What I need the most right now is support staff. Nurses, care assistants, other doctors? I know that those positions might be difficult to fill, but I’m one woman. I’m also not an anesthesiologist, an orthopedic surgeon, or a psychiatrist - my scope is very limited. 

“I also looked back at old records and I’ve noticed that none of you have ever provided medical history or undergone a physical. Before you leave for your mission, I’d like to do that for each one of you to get a baseline to compare later records to,” you said, counting each thing off on your fingers. Price nodded. 

“I can get the boys to get looked at for sure, but extra staff will take time to find. If there’s ever an emergency that you can’t tackle, we go to the general base hospital, but that’s discouraged due to the secretive nature of the work the task force does,” he explained. 

“Sir, I’d like you to undergo a physical too. Not just the boys. Do you have any reservations about seeing me?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“I don’t doubt your competency, Feelgood, and I mean no offense, but I…dislike the idea of being prodded at.” Price admitted. You nodded sympathetically. 

“What if I gave you a questionnaire and you wrote things down? I’d settle for that and a check of your vitals - that’s really what I want from you guys anyway.”

“I’ll think about it.”

—

“Oh, come on, you’re telling me you aren’t appreciating being pampered and doted on by a cute girl while you’re laid up in bed?” Gaz asked teasingly. Ghost grunted. 

“I’d rather not have been shot, Sargent,” he said dryly, poking at the buttons on the side of the hospital bed. The bed alarm was blaring, signaling that he had gotten up, but you were too far away in Price’s office to hear. 

“But you think she’s cute, right? Come on, how could you not? And she’s got fire, too, I like her.” Gaz teased, making Ghost roll his eyes - but he didn’t respond. He finally figured out how to silence the bed alarm and the room went quiet again.

“Oh my god, you do think she’s cute! Come on mate, at least ask if she’s seeing anyone!” Soap almost shouted, laughing in disbelief. 

“If anything, I’d like to see less of her. She’s fuckin’ everywhere, buzzing around me. Won’t shut the fuck up.” Ghost said. This was a lie - he just didn’t want his teammates to see how you got under his skin. Soap and Gaz groaned in unison. 

“You should see if she’ll come out with us before we leave. I wonder if she likes bars?” Gaz wondered aloud. Ghost stiffened where he stood. 

“You’re leaving? All of you?” he asked.

“Less than a week, it’s a quick one this time. It’ll just be you and the–” Soap’s eyes widened in realization.

“Steamin’ Jesus it’ll just be him and the doc!” he exclaimed, turning wide-eyed to Gaz. 

“If anything happens–”

“Watch your mouth before you end up with me here in the med bay.”

“--you’ll tell us, right?”

“It’s perfect, you’ve got a whole week to flirt with her without him bothering you,” Gaz said, jabbing his thumb back at Soap.

—

Gaz was your first physical patient. You’d offered to take him back into your office for privacy but he said he didn’t mind Ghost sitting in. Ghost was on his phone on the couch in the corner with a cup of tea and hardly paying attention to the world - it was a compromise you’d come to once you found out he’d broken the bed alarm and he’d threatened to go back to his room permanently. 

“I didn’t know your name was Kyle. I like it, it suits you,” you remarked as you took his blood pressure. 

“Thanks, Feelgood.”

“Makes you sound like an American frat boy.” Ghost quipped from the corner. 

“Hey, be nice. Is HIPAA a thing over here?” you asked. Gaz laughed and shrugged and you went forward with the exam.

Overall he seemed to be in exceptional health and you were satisfied with your findings. Gaz seemed oddly relieved when you told him so, almost as if he was worried he’d fail the health exam. You sent him outside and called Soap in. 

“Hey, lass, no finger up the arse today right?” he asked nervously, sitting down on the gurney you’d set up as you took his temperature. 

“Not unless you’re into it,” you said dryly, earning a surprised cough from Ghost and a laugh from Soap. 

Soap’s exam went as well as Gaz’s had and he walked out with an inflated ego when you informed him that he was in excellent physical shape. You decided to approach Ghost next. 

“Your turn big guy,” you said, gesturing for him to raise his arm so you could attach the blood pressure cuff.

“I’ve been in this fuckin’ bay for days, don’t you have enough?” he grumbled but reluctantly obeyed - only so he could feel your warm hands against his skin as you secured the cuff. 

“I’ve been managing your wound and making sure you don’t get infected, not doing full physicals every day,” you said with a laugh. “Give me your hand?” 

He held it out to you and you took it, gently attaching the clip. His hand dwarfed yours and your face warmed slightly as you lowered the hand back to his thigh. Ghost watched you attentively, doing his best to read your expressions. You cleared your throat. 

“So, got anything cool you like to do on leave?” you asked, doing your best to strike up a conversation. 

“No.” Ghost grunted, a little too harshly. He winced and immediately felt bad. You took the equipment off of him when it had finished reading his vitals and tucked it away in the corner again, a little hurt. 

“I’m sorry,” he said after a minute as you fiddled with your stethoscope. “I didn’t mean to say that so aggressively.”

“It’s alright. Can I listen to your heart or would you rather me not touch you?” you asked briskly, watching him. 

“S’alright,” he grumbled, sitting forward and tugging his shirt off. 

“Oh, you didn’t have to– that’s okay, I can check your bandages afterward,” you said, your face hot as you took the sight of him in. Scars and old wounds crisscrossed his chest and a large bruise extended from beneath the bandages near his side. 

You put a gentle hand on his shoulder and leaned forward, carefully listening to his heart through your stethoscope. His skin was warm and it made butterflies take flight in your stomach. 

“Can I hear from your back?” you asked softly after a moment. Ghost grunted his assent and bent forward. You leaned over his shoulder slowly, pressing your stethoscope to his back. 

Ghost couldn’t help himself as you leaned over him. Your soft skin practically burned him where you touched him and his heart rate picked up quickly. He took a deep breath and gently wrapped an arm around your waist, steadying his hand on your lower back. 

You looked at him in surprise but didn’t pull away. He met your gaze for a moment before pulling away and sitting forward again. 

“M’ sorry. Should go get something to eat.” he grumbled, picking his shirt up and moving to put it back on. 

“It’s - uh…it’s okay! Can I…change your bandages first?” you asked softly, your voice coming out as almost a squeak. Ghost nodded and waited patiently as you gathered the supplies you needed. The feeling of your touch against him made him shiver when you returned. 

How he wished he could reach out and sweep you up in his arms, press a kiss to your lips, whisk you back to his room, and never leave. As you changed his bandages, he watched and imagined you trailing those delicate fingers up his chest to ruck his mask up and pull him down into a kiss. 

“Thanks,” he uttered as you finished, and that’s all he did. He tugged his shirt on and was almost to the door when he turned around. 

“Soap and Gaz wanted me to ask you if you’d come out with the lot of us before they leave,” he said. You didn’t have to think about it. 

“Of course!”

-----

taglist: @iamaliceinwonderland, @itsmeamysworld, @ghostlythots, @oranoyaora, @keiva1000

[whyreyousoobsessedwithme]

I know it's late, I was finishing my final exams and assignments, but lookism 497

I knew I wasn't going to like his brother from the start. He gave off bad vibes before even appearing. That man needs to be put tf down. He looks like he'd disrespect my parents.

Need to know the relationship between James and gitae because he seems like a bigshot who wouldn't just do anything for anyone, so for him to try to kill jichang because James requested it isn't sitting well with me. Like I did not like James before because I thought he was a selfish and conniving bitch but after this chapter I genuinely want him GONE. Him, gun, goo, taejin, gitae (obviously), Charles(duh), and the tracksuit brothers. I want them ALL GONE. They've done enough damage.

Literally seeing James Lee in a whole different light now,I can see why the kings want him dead. As they should.

The one time police try to do good, they're brutally murder/injured.

I think jewu liked Mary too.

Leave it to ptj to try to write hetero romance for every character despite sucking at it. Like she literally thought of his mom as her mom. Whyd he have to make it weird?

I don't get why these guys can't just communicate properly like is it so hard to tell them he's leaving for their safety?

I FUCKING PREDICTED THIS SHIT.

Taejin count your fucking days.

PTJ still didn't explain why Sujin is wearing the same clothes as the yakuza members that trained Taejin when she was just a servant. Or the motorcycle incident.

[idontknowreallywhy]

Estera Ch 34 - Anniversary

What went before

Four whole chapters of 90% proof fluff?

Pfffft, can’t be letting that streak continue… 😂

I know what’ll fix it, some good old Scotty inner-monologue.

But lest he get too angst-ridden, there’ll be some puppy piling and some Babs to fluffen things out…

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Hey, how’s things? Fancy a chat?

Always. Give me 2 mins to escape.

Scott carefully extracted his legs from under a pile of snoozing younger brothers and shuffled his way off the couch, staggering slightly as the blood rushed back into his tingling feet.

As much as he loved the traditional puppy pile, he knew he was never going to sleep tonight - too many thoughts were circling like vultures over a half dead sheep. If he let himself relax they’d swoop and… let’s just say it wouldn’t be pretty.

It was best he stayed awake.

This particular day of the year was always tricky, for all his family’s cunning attempts to distract him from it (and Virgil really had outdone himself this year). But it was the anniversary of the date he’d been shot down. The date everything had gone to hell. The date his life had split in two and there was a before-Scott and an After-Scott. Because despite his best efforts, he’d never been the same since.

And nor had they.

He paused and looked back at them, peacefully jigsawed together - Alan sprawled across the laps of John and Virgil, Kayo curled like a cat on Virgil’s opposite side and Gordon had somehow entwined himself between their legs. He would swear he could actually taste the bitterness of the regret that surged up, yet again, for having been the reason they’d experienced so much pain at that time...

Little Allie had been too young to understand that his Scotty wasn’t mad at him, hadn’t deliberately chosen not to come home to him… he’d apparently gone mute for weeks. John had been in the middle of exams and had just stopped sleeping. He’d aced them, sure, in the eyes of the rest of the world at least, but Scott knew the eventual scores hadn’t been what John had wanted or expected. Gordon had ended up suspended from school for trashing the library, until Virgil had met the headmaster to explain the situation and the suspension was replaced by authorised compassionate leave until the end of term. That should have been his job, not Virgil’s. Well… maybe Dad’s. But he’d sworn to be there when their father couldn’t be and the fact that on that occasion it was because of Scott himself that their father was unavailable… it felt like a double failure.

And then his Virgil… It had nearly destroyed him.

Scott didn’t know the detail. He only knew what he knew about the others because he’d overheard conversations, seen school records, noticed the twitch in John’s jaw when he’d belatedly congratulated him on his results. But his closest brother… all he knew was that it had been bad. Really bad. There was nothing more to overhear, because people just didn’t talk about it. Ever.

Kayo, thankfully, hadn’t been around at the time, but he still worried about what she knew and what impact that had. She knew a lot of things nobody else did… it was her job after all… and it shouldn’t matter. But occasionally when certain parts of the world, certain organisations came up he would catch her looking at him in a way that… well, worried him.

He really wished mind bleach was a thing.

He shook his foot impatiently and limped out of the lounge. His left shoulder twinged insistently and he tried to ignore it. It was purely psychological, he knew that very well. The scans had been clear for years and it only bothered him at this time of year. Ironic really, that this was the only phantom pain that remained. After all the violence that had been inflicted on him… all the fractures and internal damage… the only thing that still bothered him was the injury that had been his own fault. The one he’d given himself when he finally gave into despair and tried to smash his way through a steel door.

He shivered. This wasn’t a great line of thought to be pursuing. He mouthed the lines he’d been grounding himself with all day:

Sunward I’ve climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun-split clouds…

He was free. He was loved.

It was all in the past.

All except for the bits that still managed to hurt them all.

Recent events had dispelled the illusion that, with time, his brothers might forget that for too long their strong eldest brother had been the weakest of them all. His bout of illness had given them a little refresher in why loving him would cause them pain. He wished it didn’t. It was too unfair that the people he most wanted to protect from his fallibility were the ones was most likely to be hurt by it.

The little voice that often sounded a lot like Patricia’s questioned whether it made any sense to feel guilty merely for being loved that much and pointed out that loving them back didn’t require shielding them from every kind of pain the world could inflict either. He was trying to believe it. Really. But the need to protect had always been so central to who he was… it was easy enough for Patricia to say these things because she didn’t have to live in his head.

Estera had made a similar point. He’d found that harder to shrug off, though, perhaps because she wasn’t being paid to make him feel better.

After a few weeks of respite the same old dream had returned with a vengeance this morning, almost unchanged, and he’d woken in a cold sweat, nauseous and confused. He’d spent most of the day wanting to call her, to reassure himself it wasn’t real, that the invisible thread was intact… that she was ok. He knew she was… and that his memories were false. But sometimes they could still be so vivid.

And today he just couldn’t get the memory of her screaming out of his head.

Except, of course, he’d never heard it. Not really. He stopped for a moment to let that fact sink in, tracing his fingertips across the stone walls of the stairwell.

He made it to the privacy of his room and called as he walked through the door, feeling a little as though he could actually, finally relax as she answered:

“Hi Blue, how are you?”

He wasn’t sure when the nickname had crept into use, and he wasn’t unaware that she was now effectively referring to him by the same name as the damn hellhound, but he found he didn’t dislike it at all. In fact it made him feel kind of warm inside. It was so very her.

“Hey! Nice to hear from you! Not a lot going on here, everyone else fell asleep during movie night so I’m just chilling on the balcony now. What are you up to?”

“Having a little lunchtime walk. Just sent the kids off to lunch and managed to persuade Barbara to switch my playground duty to Monday as I just cannot mediate any more battles this week.”

“Ah, dear old Babs, she doing alright?”

Estera chuckled “Well the reception desk collection of news-clippings featuring your face is increasing on an almost daily basis. She keeps asking when you’re coming back to visit us again.”

“Good to know someone out there appreciates the Scott Tracy. Send her my love.”

“You are a ridiculous creature.”

“Guilty as charged.” Scott grinned to himself.

She snorted and then hummed thoughtfully.

“You didn’t answer my question you know, don’t think I didn’t spot that.”

“I didn’t? What question?”

“I asked how you were and you told me what you were doing. That’s not the same thing.”

“Ah… Huh. Nothing gets past you does it?”

“Nope.” Scott could picture the raised eyebrow that would likely have been deployed in the brief pause that followed. He sighed.

“I’m… mixed? It’s ridiculous really because I’m perfectly aware it’s just a calendar date, an arbitrary system imposed by some ancient guys, and it’s not as if we’re even in the same point in space or anything… so just because the number is the same it doesn’t make the day particularly special… but…”

“It’s an anniversary?”

“Yeah. It is.” He fidgeted absent-mindedly with the mechanism of the lounger and only narrowly avoided trapping his fingers as it shifted suddenly. He pinned his free hand between his knees and cleared his throat, continuing: “Virgil and co have been trying to distract me all day.”

“Did it work?”

“Not really… but we had a nice time anyway.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Scott thought about this. He probably should. Ten minutes beforehand he thought he did. But now… he didn’t actually want to. The compulsion to overanalyse every memory that had been swirling through his head had eased, the cycling thoughts dissipated and, for now, he was happy to let them go. It was enough that she knew and understood.

“Actually… no. Is that ok? I’ve been thinking about it a lot all day and would rather just focus on something else for a bit?”

“Of course it’s ok. As long as you talk to someone when you need to.”

She and Virgil could be tag-teaming. He briefly wondered if his brother had tipped her off, but then realised she would have a similar date this weekend and probably didn’t need prompting.

“I’m getting better at that, I promise.

“I’m always here if that helps.”

“Noted, thank you. Really.”

He let his shoulders relax into the backrest and his hand fall to rest at his side. He could hear seabirds - such a familiar sound yet a bizarre experience when he was looking out over a quiet moonlight ocean himself. Given his ship could have him by her side in less than an hour, it always made him feel a little unbalanced to remember how topsy turvy their days were.

“So, lunch with Penny tomorrow, you excited?”

“Yes! I mean, I think so? Or slightly terrified?”

They talked of Penny-Event survival tactics and Scott heard the word “shenanigans” in context for the first time, vowing to use it constantly from now on. Estera expressed doubts about his tried and tested methods of upper class social engagement which she unfairly summarised as “flirting outrageously with everything that moves” and suggested she might need another less “Scott Tracy” approach. He feigned outrage and offence. She called him ridiculous again and laughed wholeheartedly. Mission accomplished. He closed his eyes and tried to fix in his memory that sound he realised he’d needed to hear so badly… hoping it would at some point become the stronger one. She was happy. She was ok. All of them were ok.

He realised he’d drifted, listening to the melody of her voice but not the words. Mentally slapping himself he refocused and realised she was now talking about a mixed martial arts competition she was thinking about entering.

“You should do it.”

“You think so?”

“If you’d enjoy it, why not?”

“I might not win…”

“Ha! Competitive much?”

“Isn’t everyone? Wait, what time is it?”

“Here it’s about ten to midnight, what are you, 11 hours behind?”

“Ok, good. I have time, will just walk a little quicker. Ugh my watch just won’t hold a charge anymore, I swear I plugged it in last night... why don’t they make things to last anymore?”

“Oh that’s frustrating, is it still in warranty? They should replace the battery for you?”

She mumbled something.

“Sorry, E, I didn’t catch that.”

“Don’t worry. Hey, I’m nearly back, so I’ll have to go in a minute… maybe you should actually get some sleep, Scott? I’d put money on you not having had a decent chunk of shut eye for a week at least.”

He laughed again but slightly awkwardly this time.

“Yes, Miss.”

He heard the jangling of the school entrance buzzer and Estera quietly greeting someone.

“Hey, before you go…”

He’d had a sudden idea but before he could get any further he heard a familiar voice calling “Hellooooo Scott Tracy!” in the background.

He could tell Estera was smothering the giggles and then she muttered quietly “Oh dear I’m sorry, there’s really no point denying it, my poker face is awful… could you do me a favour and say hello? If this works I’ll get the best rota slots for a month.” He heard the phone being passed over and braced himself before adopting the voice:

“Well hey there Babs, my dear, how are you keeping?”

A peal of tittering before she returned the greeting and informed him she was keeping very well and had been following his progress. He was then mildly scolded for being so silly as to fall off a skyscraper. He found himself apologising. Then promising to come back and visit again soon. Eventually the phone was handed back and Estera’s voice was a blessed relief to hear.

“I owe you one. She’s just concluded Alastair hasn’t coordinated sports day in a long time and I’m sure she had me lined up for that this morning.”

“Happy to be of assistance, I think? Although sports day sounds like a fun thing…”

“Not the planning part, Scott. It’s like building a bridge out of jellyfish. Anyway, you were going to ask something?”

Had he? Oh! He had… perhaps it wasn’t a good idea, she probably had things to do but he couldn’t think of anything else to say on the spot so cleared his throat and asked anyway:

“Um, it was just… did you have any plans for Sunday? I know it will be… a day… for you but maybe did you want to do something together? Ten years since we met and all? You could update me on the lunch… schenanigans? But… of course I totally understand if you’d rather be on your own, I wouldn’t want to interfere with whatever you… might… have um…” he was rambling now, suddenly unsure of himself.

“No, I… it would be nice not to be alone. That would be good.”

“Great, I’ll get Alan to cover for me. Your choice as to what we do, I’ll turn up where you tell me.”

“I think I have an idea. How about my place at 8am? Bring your running shoes.”

“F-A-B”

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

He smiled as she hung up and lay back for a minute, enjoying the slower pace of his thoughts. His eyelids drooped and he startled - he couldn’t fall asleep here, they’d miss him. But maybe now he could have a little doze out there, in the company of his precious family. He quickly switched his habitual jeans for more comfortable sweatpants and quietly opened the door with the intention of sneaking back downstairs. Then nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Vee! What…?”

Virgil sat on the floor opposite the doorway, head leaning back, eyes heavy with sleep. He jolted awake, slightly headbutting the wall as he did so and struggled to his feet.

“Y’rite Scotty?”

Bleary eyed as Virgil was, Scott could almost feel the assessment in his brother’s gaze, more probing than any of his beloved medi-scanners. Scott suddenly realised how waking to find him gone might have felt.

“Yeah, I’m ok. Sorry to disappear. Was chatting to Estera and didn’t want to disturb you all.”

“No problem. Just didn’t want you to…” Virgil paused to yawn so widely it made Scott wince, sure he must have dislocated his jaw in the process. His little brother then blinked rapidly and looked around as if trying to locate his train of thought. Scott threw an arm around his shoulders and steered them both back in the direction of the lounge.

“You didn’t want me to what?”

“Oh. Right… Be alone. Feel alone. Think that you had to be alone… if you didn’t want to… be alone… you know?”

Virgil yawned again and Scott squeezed his shoulder a little tighter.

“I do know. And I don’t feel alone. It’s ok. I know I always have you.”

Virgil smirked “And not just us anymore… right?” Even his sleepy eyebrows were capable of behaving outrageously it seemed.

“I’m going to assume you’re too tired to know what you’re saying which would make it unsporting to throw you in the pool.”

Virgil snorted “You could try!”

“Ssssh, you’ll wake the others.”

They’d reached the lounge. Alan had shuffled into the space Virgil had vacated and John had pivoted to the horizontal and was drooling elegantly into the couch cushions. Scott made the speedy situational assessment that reintegrating into the original pile was going to be excessively complicated and thus setting up camp afresh on the other couch would be a better bet.

“Sit” he ordered in as commanding big brother a whisper as he could manage. Virgil obeyed and immediately lost the ability to sit upright. By the time Scott returned with a heap of blankets his head was resting on the arm rest and he was adding his bass rumble to the familiar symphony of Tracy sleep noises.

Scott distributed his stash, ensuring the whole family was adequately tucked in and took a moment to thank God, the universe, whoever it was that finally brought him home to them. Then he lifted Virgil’s legs, acknowledging privately he might have had a point about the pool-throwing thing, and carefully manoeuvred his way on to the couch, snuggling under his own blue blanket. He leant back and allowed his eyes to finally close, enjoying the sense of security the weight of his brother’s feet across his lap provided. As he drifted off he mused on that metaphor… how what an onlooker might see as a burden, could in fact be the most spectacular privilege he could ever ask for.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[diabolikpersonals]

kanato cl endings!! this is my new favorite kanato route!! and for once, I think the good ending is more satisfying than the bad one lol

euphoria end:

in the church, kanato concludes that he just can’t ignore the sakamaki brothers. he has all kinds of feelings for them, including jealousy and contempt, and because of that, he won’t be able to part with them easily. (thats the most backwards way to say you love them I’ve ever heard, but I’ll take it!! good job, kanato!!) but outside, the scarlet and violet families are arguing over who gets to go inside and steal eve. ayato and laito are standing guard, and even though they’re SO outnumbered, ayato declares that they’ve got no choice but to stop em. and laito says it’s for his oniichan’s sake ^^

kanato… [wiping tears] …wants to go save ayato and laito. he can’t leave them, because they’re brothers who have been together since before they were born.

before he goes, he and yui stand at the altar and yui comments that it feels like a wedding, but kanato refutes that they can’t possibly have a wedding without wedding cake. they have a ring, though! because kanato bit yui’s ring finger earlier and it left a scar. so, because it might be their last time, they exchange vows and kiss.

…which is, of course, the key to leaving this place. everything goes white and they’re back in the real world. yui thinks ayato and laito are dead for a sec, but theyre just snoozin. karl heinz shows up, explains the whole thing, and gives kanato a pat on the back and tells him it’s time to inherit his powers.

kanato says, no way!! I won’t be king. I once thought that I didn’t care about those other guys, but I’ve just realized I have all these complicated feelings about them, and I don’t know what I’ll do if those guys are gone. so I won’t be all alone like you, father.

karl heinz is like “lmao…I’ll give u a little more time” and he disappears. time to go home. kanato jokes that they can leave ayato and the others behind, but he’s not serious >_> so they get to work waking em up. kanato says that he never thought such a day would come, but he misses how noisy the sakamaki house is. (awwww…!!)

back at the sakamaki house, the triplets + yui are studying together for a makeup exam. ayato and laito start goofing off after ten minutes, but kanato is SERIOUS because reiji hid all his sweets so he NEEDS to pass. he kicks his brothers out so he can focus, then grumbles that he should’ve left them at the miniature garden (LMAO) but yui’s like “aww, you’re totally having fun.” they make out and kanato says he loves her no matter where they are, and all’s well that ends well!! good for them!

labyrinth end:

yui confidently tells kanato she’ll trust whatever his decision is, and he’s like “okay. I want to murder everyone.” yui is all UMMM anything but that, please??? but he’s not listening. he sucks her blood till she loses consciousness

it suddenly cuts to carla whipping ruki and shin till they pass out, which is awesome but very unexpected. it’s the first we’ve seen them since they got captured lol. subaru arrives to tell carla that eve is at the church, so off we go!!

at the church, ayato and laito have gotten their asses severely kicked by scarlet fam. yuma also collapses and shu’s like “yuma….!” which is enough otp crumbs to keep me fed all week, thank you very much. carla arrives on the scene and starts shittalking with reiji, but then…!!

………..when yui wakes up, she sees kanato is covered in blood and she’s like “oh god we have to treat ur injuries!” and of course kanato’s like “dont worry, it’s not my blood ^^” he happily tells her that he’s almost finished taking care of things here, and he continues his unspeakable violence. he’s killed everyone and they’re the only ones left. he hugs her, and the blood he’s covered with is still warm.

well it doesn’t work; they don’t go home. (not that this would work anyway, but aren’t ruki and shin still alive in the violet dungeon? am I wrong…? did carla kill them? whatever.) yui faints and can’t speak, so kanato moves her around like a doll. they’ll live forever in this world, then, just the two of them. it’ll be awfully quiet.

back in the real world, karl heinz is like “my friend. did u get my sons killed” and socrates is like “sowwy :( I just didnt think it was worth it to lose my best friend to some immature adam.” karl heinz says it’s ok, and socrates suggests reversing time. karl heinz is like sure, yeah, let’s reverse time and have them try again. (EXCUSE ME???? EXCUSE ME????????????? COULD U DO THAT THIS WHOLE TIME. THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING) so I guess they, uh, reverse time and try again????.?.??

[moonysbxtch0]

505

Part 7 : To prank or not to prank…

Summary: To prank or not to prank... that's the question. Reader is conflicted if she wants to join her friends in pranking people or if she wants to rest given that a busy day is waiting for her the next day...

Pairing : Remus Lupin x werewolf student

Warnings: Wet dream, sexual innuendo

Ao3 link : https://archiveofourown.org/works/39275319/chapters/109055229#workskin

You were sleeping like the dead. Not caring in the slightest about what was happening outside,not getting bothered by the heavy storm ,not getting annoyed from the accidental eavesdropping that always came as a result of your sharp sense of hearing,not caring about anything at all. Hell another war could start and you wouldn't even bother to get up. You were tired.

These past few weeks had been taking a troll on you both physically and mentally. Starting from the last transformation ...they kept getting worse and worse each time, constant detentions with different professors because you and the twins had made a powerful comeback , pulling many pranks that varied from small things such as changing timetables to all houses, leading to confusion to almost starting the biggest food war in Hogwarts if professor McGonagall hadn't interfered. Somebody had accidentally thrown pumpkin juice in her face and to put it simply...she wasn't happy.

Other than the harmless fun ,you had managed to make time to study. You took back the words you had said on your fifth year when you complained about your O.W.L.S.Compared to the suffering of having to study for your N.E.W.T.S the previous exams seemed like a piece of cake. The professors decided to have all the 7th years undergo exams for their subjects,which in term of difficulty were supposed to be as difficult as your N.E.W.T.S .Just in case. Had said professor McGonagall.

You had finished almost all of the exams.You had done good in general. You knew that you could have done better but still you were happy with your work. Potions exam, the one which kept you up all night to study for , hadn't gone as good as you expected but it was good enough for Snape to shut his mouth with his snarky comments.

You had studied hard but the exam you truly were looking forward to get a good grade in, was none other than DADA. It was your favourite subject and the only subject you had always excelled at,even before professor Lupin came in frame. So you didn't want to disappoint.

'You've done so well Y/N.'

'Perfect score Y/N, I'm proud of you.'

Just thinking about possible sentences  professor Lupin would use to praise you , motivated you more than enough. He had been praising you a lot lately and you've found out that you quite like getting praised, especially when he was the one doing the praising.

'Only one of you managed to get an O this time." Professor Lupin said as he moved his eyes from the sheets of paper on his hands to the class." Not even a single mistake." then he moved his eyes in your direction, smiling softly at you." Congratulations Y/N."You felt yourself blushing as you returned the smile.

You blinked and when you opened your eyes again somehow your classmates had disappeared. The only people on the classroom were only you and professor Lupin, who was standing in front of you. You were sitting on a chair and he had placed his hands on the edges of it ,near your rear. He had caged you with his arms and you couldn't escape.

"Hard work gets rewarded." He was piercing you with his gaze and you felt your abdomen tighten. You wanted him. Needed him."So tell me ,what is it that you want as your reward sweetheart?" He leaned closer and your breath caught." Come on , don't be shy." He placed his index finger under your chin, titled your head upward and made you move your eyes to his. You couldn't speak. You tried to, yet you couldn't. It felt like someone had hexed you or had cut your vocal cords.

" I see the way you look at me." his tone was low but deep. He closed the distance even more and your noses were brushing each other."I know all about those fantasies you have during my class." He moved his lips to your cheek."About how you want me to bend you over my knee and spank you till you can't sit anymore."He moved lower and finally his lips found your neck." About how you want me to dominate you." He sucked the flesh under your jaw and you whimpered."Ruin this pretty body." He started kissing your neck sloppily."Use you for my own pleasure." His lips found your cheek again." You would enjoy that, wouldn't you?" He pulled back for a second.Given that you couldn't speak ,you simply nodded."Well sweetheart. How could I deny those wishes to my favourite student?"He moved closer to you and you wanted nothing but to kiss him.Wanted to know how his lips would taste. His lips barely made any contact before you felt yourself come back to reality.

<•>

The only thing that you were able to see now was nothing but darkness. Your consciousness had come back yet you didn't want to open your eyes yet. You were hoping to go back to that dream,even if it was the last thing you did. Your eyes kept twitching as you squeezed them shut.A knock on your door caught your attention. You were conflicted with yourself,did you want to get up or did you not. You felt that you were slowly losing your consciousness again but the knocking sound didn't stop ,which made you groan in frustration and throw your blankets on the floor as you stood up on your feet.

Annoyed,you moved your eyes around the room , trying to spot the clock and when you noticed the time you felt like ripping the throat of whoever was outside. It was 2 in the fucking morning. You took a breath to relax yourself and slowly made your way to the door , wrapped your fingers around the doorknob and when you twisted the later , nothing came into view. Not a single living thing that could have caused the knocking could be seen...or that's what anyone else would have thought.

"Alright. Fred, George. Walk inside before you wake anyone else up." You yawned as you took a step back so they could both enter.You couldn't see them ,yet you could hear their footsteps. Before closing the door ,you peaked from left to right and when you were sure no one saw anything you closed the door. They had already removed the invisibility cloak,which they must have borrowed from Harry ,again. George folded it and then he carefully placed it on your table.

"You look terrible." Fred commented as he laid on your bed,body facing the ceiling,face facing you. He crossed his hands behind his head to make himself more comfortable.

"Thanks." You poured yourself a glass of water. You were feeling thirsty,your throat felt dry."To what do I own the pleasure,boys?"You sipped the liquid as you moved your eyes from Fred to George ,who was also walking in the direction of your bed.

"To put it simply -"George laid on his side ,crossed his legs and rested his chin on his palm as he faced you.They looked ridiculous like that. Fred didn't even hesitate to put his legs on George's hip." We couldn't sleep so we figured that we should do something fun."

"Shoes off my bed Weasleys." You warned and they both simultaneously took of their shoes and loud thumps were heard when they made contact with the floor. You grimaced at the sound.

"Happy?" They said at the same time.

"Very." You forced a smile.

"Are you in?"

"I'm afraid I can't this time. I've roughly gotten 3 hours of sleep and I've got an important exam tomorrow."

"What subject?" Asked George as he levitated himself an apple and when he grabbed hold of it he took a bite.The crunchy sound it made when he bit it ,echoed on the room.

"DADA." You placed the glass on the counter, stretched your arms on the air and sighed.You  felt sleepy and you would very much prefer to continue that dream you were having before they  arrived here.

"Old Lupin won't mind if you sleep through it."Said Fred as he yawned."I slept halfway through mine,I woke up ,wrote my name , answered a few questions and he didn't say a single thing."

"What grade did you take?" You couldn't picture professor Lupin actually allowing someone to sleep during his class and actually give them a good grade.

"Barely took an acceptable."

"Self explanatory." You shook your head."I'm afraid that I'm not aiming for simply acceptable. Your brother has been trying to surpass me in DADA for years, won't give him the pleasure of doing so tomorrow."

"We can hex Percy if that's your concern.Suddenly he will wake up with runny nose and a terrible flu."

"He is your brother." You sighed."You're evil."

"Couldn't care less. Probably mum would appriciate us more if he took a bad grade."

"Leave him alone." You sighed.

"Alright. He won't wake up sick. Back at you.Don't you want to have a bit of fun.You've only been studying lately."

"Don't play that card with me Fred."

"What will it take to convince you?"

"If you got a spell that can make me sleep six hours within two hours ,I will gladly join."

"Do I look like Merlin himself to you.Of course I don't."

"Can't help you then."

"Merlin woman." Said George."I can get you out of that exam. Have one of our candies, pretend to be sick and repeat it another time."

"Double work for me George. I don't want to have to study again. Plus your new candies aren't even tested yet."

"Talking about candies you would make a good test subject."

"Never in a million years! Remember what happened last time I ate one?"

"You suddenly grew a dick ,not that big of deal."

"Not that big of a deal? I had a whole ass dick and I could barely pee. Not to mention that I had to explain to Oliver why he felt something rubbing against his dick when we were kissing. Not cool." They both started laughing and as pissed as you were about the whole thing you joined them.

"Okay, okay...no candies." George kept laughing." How about we put professor Lupin under the cofundus charm?"

"If you actually think that you can do that to your DADA professor,you're stupid." You wiped a tear that had rolled down your cheek.

"Hey! We were able to make professor Dumbledore speak gibberish once...Lupin won't be a problem."

"Find a better solution." You sighed. Never in a million years would they succeed in putting Lupin under the cofundus charm. Plus you didn't like cheating.

"Okay then. I'm sorry that I have to even bring this up. Back in October during Halloween you fell sick and didn't join us. You told us that you owed us one...time to repay."

Fuck George Weasley. You felt a sweat drop trail down your spine. You were anxious.Turned out that Halloween and full moon were on the same day so you formed a shitty excuse and told them you were sick and couldn't join them. You even promised them that you would join them whenever they asked if they didn't bring the topic up again.Talk about bad timing...

"You had to go there didn't you?"You made a face at them."All right. I'm coming."

"Yayy."They said lazily with fake excitement and clapped."So what's the plan?"

"You-" you took a deep breath "I hate you guys. You seriously woke me up without even having planned something."

"As I said. You come up with a good stuff."You walked in their direction and joined them on your bed.

"I was saving this one for December but guess I'll have to come up with something else. So my plan is that we flood the Slytherin common room in candle wax and make sure to leave a message as well. "

"Candle Wax? That's brilliant! Where are we finding the candles tho?"

"I considered transfiguring some of the objects into candles but figured that Snape would just reverse it. So I've been stealing a few for about a month. There are more than enough."

"Have we ever told you that we love you?"Said Fred and you laughed.

<•>

The three of you were currently under the cloak, barely holding your laughs. You just knew that tomorrow would be one hell of a day and you were glad you didn't have classes with Snape . Though you were having fun you felt dizzy and your head and eyes head were hurting. You needed to sleep.Though you were sure you didn't have too much time to do so...

"Who is it?" You recognised the voice. It was Peeves,the poltergeist that has been the most annoying ghost ever since you've stepped foot here. The bastard couldn't see you but he could sense your presence. You ought to be careful." I can't see you...but I can sense you. Reveal yourselves now."

"We are in trouble. "George leaned close to your ear and whispered. You simply shrugged and when you moved your eyes in Fred's direction the latter was smirking.

"Let me take care of this- I heard that Harry did this in his first year and Peeves believed him."

"Are you ghosts,ghouls or students?"Peeves' voice was demanding.

Fred cleared his throat before speaking."What the Bloody Baron does during the night doesn't concern you Peeves,do I have to repeat myself everytime I see you?!" He changed his voice and had you not been close to him you would have absolutely thought that he indeed was the Bloody Baron.

"Oh my- sorry sir. I didn't know it was you. My apologies. " He retreated. You started laughing but caught yourself quickly and put a hand on your mouth when you felt to golden eyes staring at you. Your laugh must have caught her attention and if Mrs. Norris was here it meant that Filch would be here any second now.The cat started licking itself and then mewled loudly,a sign for her owner to hurry up. The twins had frozen momentarily.

"Let's retreat quietly." You said through gritted teeth in a low tone, whispering.

"She will follow us." Said George as the three of you started walking backwards slowly. The problem was that the cat started following you and soon enough it caught up with you and started playing with the cloak ,which wasn't a good sign by any means. Fred slowly put his hand on his back pocket and trying his best to not make any sound he pointed his wand at the cat. When you noticed what he was doing you put your hand on his forearm and nodded.

"You saw what happened last year when somebody touched his cat." You whispered.

"I'm not killing her. I will just-"

"Is someone there ?" It felt like you were in a horror movie. The door creaked open and the ligh from the lantern which Filch was holding was enveloping the dark corridor. It took him a bit of time to come into view but when he did ,you almost jumped. He had fallen for one of your pranks that you had put in his office, just in case, before you decided to prank the Slytherins. His face had gotten swollen and his eyes were so small it looked like they weren't even there. George snorted and you slapped him behind his head. This wasn't the best moment to start laughing."Students out of bed?"Filch said , raising the lantern so he could take a better look." Oh you can not hide.I will catch you."

You slowly started retreating backwards but what truly made you feel like your heart would burst from anxiety was the door that creaked open on the other side. This couldn't get worse. This particular corridor was narrower than most and it was impossible for you to move one way or another without bumping either to Filch either to the person who opened the other door. You were screwed.

"Y/n!" Fred said ,his voice filled with anxiety.He had taken a proper scolding from his mother only one week ago and surely he didn't want to get caught again. Professor McGonagall made it clear that she would tell Molly for each and every trouble they caused , no matter how harmless it may have been,without hesitation."Let me petrify Filch so we can make a run for it."

It felt like your heart was bursting out of your chest. The constant ringing on your ears that got faster and faster wasn't helping with your anxiety at all. It wasn't that you cared if you got caught in the act in general,the problem was that after seeing the Slytherin dorm tomorrow, Snape was going to get mad. And if he heard that you three had been spotted out past curfew,he would make it his life mission to get the three of you expelled.

"That we can do..." You tried to swallow but if felt difficult to do so.

"Filch." The voice made you freeze on your feet.You heart skipped a beat and for a moment you forgot how to breathe. Could this get worse? Apparently it could." Is something going on here?"

Footsteps grew closer and closer and when you slowly tilted your head you realised that your ears weren't playing a trick on you. No. It was professor Lupin himself. He was holding his wand on his hand ,while his other hand was on his pocket. He was walking slowly, shaking his head slightly from left to right.You've always loved the way he walked.

"Students are out of bed professor."Filch frowned. Maybe it was the lighting,maybe your mind created the image but you were more than sure that you saw the professor smirking at the info.

"Are you sure?" He walked past you and the twins. Hell. He didn't bump into you three ,it felt as if he knew exactly where to walk to avoid you.Maybe you were reaching. There was no way he would know.

"More than sure." Filch clenched his fist."Look what they did to my face! I'm going to find them and then I will make sure to hang them from their ankles!"

"Alright,calm down." The professor snapped his fingers and in a second the whole corridor was enveloped in light. The candles lit themselves and you heard the few paintings that were around complain. He pointed his wand at Filch and in a second fixed his face back to normal."Your face is still going to be swollen for a few days. If I were you ,I would stop at Poppy's instead of chasing students out of bed right now."

"I don't give a shit!" Filch threw the lantern on the floor and its glass shattered." They need to get punished!"

"Okay , okay." Professor Lupin ran a hand through his hair and scratched the back of his head. "Did you even consider that it might have been Peeves?"

"That bastard wouldn't dare-"

"After all-" You heard a hint of laugh in the professor's voice as he turned his back on Filch and started walking in your direction.George clasped your hand and motioned with his head for you three to make a run for it."students know what awaits them if they are caught out of bed this late ,don't they?" It looked as if he was seeing right through the cloak,as if he knew you were there but it was simply impossible. Harry's cloak was special,spells ,no matter what kind never worked on it. You had also tried tracking spells and they also hadn't worked.So there simply wasn't any way the professor knew about you three being on the corridor.

"Punishment?" Questioned Filch.

Lupin was only a few inches away. His smell already filled your nose and it felt intoxicating. It wouldn't be normal for a man to smell that good.  He stretched his hand and for a moment you thought that you fucked up. He would grab hold of the cloak, remove it and expose the three of you.

"Punishment." He nodded and you swallowed.The tone he had used to say it...it was nothing but arousing. He squatted down and with his stretched hand picked up Mrs.Norris. The cat didn't put up a fight as it usually did with other people. Instead it started licking the professor's hand. He smiled as he kept his eyes on the cat and you felt overwhelmed. His smile at the moment was so damn attractive,so cute and so pure.You wanted him to smile like that to you.

You and Filch had nothing in common generally but at the moment you two were feeling the same emotion. Jealousy. "Give me back my cat,Lupin!" Filch hurried his step as he made his way to the professor and snatched Mrs.Norris out of the professor's hands. The professor chuckled as he patted his sleeves,to get rid of the fur that the cat had left on his clothes. "Goodnight!" Said Filch in an angry tone as he retreated back to his office.

"Goodnight." Said the professor as he snapped his fingers again, turning off the candles. He gave his wand a twist and he wordlessly casted the Lumos charm. He put his hand in his pocket again,threw a stare at the spot you and the twins were anxiously staying at ,not having moved as much as a muscle for at least ten minutes, then he quietly left in the direction he had come from.

Part8 :

[ms-snape]

Girl where did u go🙁 rescue us with some Ziyech fics

ONLY ONE CAN HAVE HER

Note(please read): I'm so sorry to take that long, I now I haven't take any request but I'm actually really busy with my exams and all, Ntw all the imagines that I actually write are from my french Wattpad account "Skylar_sky9", I'll write about your request soon that I can, I promise, good reading💗.

Summary: Mason and Hakim are in love with the same girl but it's her choice to make.

Y/n's POV

Day: Monday

I check the time on my phone for the thousandth time this evening, the restaurant was filling up more and more and I already regretted having agreed to come, glance at the waiter who gives me a sympathetic look, it was too much for me, so I decide to leave before I get more humiliated, once I get home I take off the dress I was wearing and collapse on the bed without bothering to take off the little layer of makeup on my face, I felt so stupid at that moment.

Hakim's POV

I look at the ball at my feet more angry than ever at my coach, tonight I had planned to go to dinner with Y/n , I had been trying to find the courage to propose to him for months, but Potter told me forced me to train more worst of all and that i couldn't even call him since my phone was dead literally when i got back to the locker room it wouldn't turn on i decided to go to her house and explain everything to her after practice which seemed to be endless.

Y/N's POV

I was lying on my bed staring at the ceiling, I couldn't sleep considering all the questions that were going through my head, among them, why Hakim had stood me up, he looked delighted when I had agreed to go on a date with him, maybe he had a big impediment, but if so why hadn't he called me or just texted? Suddenly the doorbell rings, I jump, hoping inside that it's Hakim, I go down the stairs quickly and open the front door to...Mason..

"hi, sorry, did I wake you up?" he asked, looking at my pyjamas which didn't hide much.

"no, I can't sleep anyway, so what brings you?"

"So... I knew you had an appointment with Hakim tonight, but I saw him in a club not even an hour ago" I felt my heart break at his words I really thought that he had a impediment, but in fact he was having fun in a club not even caring that I had spent two hours waiting for him.

"he didn't even come" I said in a whisper, I felt Mason's hand grab mine, I looked up to see that he was giving me a meal a sympathetic look just like the restaurant waiter.

"You know if you had gone with me, it wouldn't have happened at all, it's like that and you would have had a wonderful evening," he said, rubbing the top of my hand with his thumb.

"I don't know if I can..."

"Y/n... a familiar voice calls out to me, I look behind Mason to see Hakim on the threshold.

" what is he doing here?" he asked pointing to Mason.

"He came to comfort me after you stood me up to go have fun in a club" he was confused a moment before he says.

"I was not in a club but training, I wanted to call you to postpone the meeting to another day, like Saturday, but my phone is dead"

"no actually Saturday she's having dinner with me, right Y/n?" Mason holds me by the waist, Hakim gives me a pleading look waiting for my answer, I didn't know what to say, I wanted to tell him that it was wrong, but at the same time I wanted to make him feel what I felt when he didn't show up.

"Yes it's true" I just said

Day: Thursday

I was sitting in the locker room putting on my shoes to finally leave, I hadn't seen Hakim since that evening and I had to admit that I missed him, suddenly my phone vibrated telling me that I had received a message.

~ hello Y/n Y/l/n

We invite you to participate to a game this Friday where two players from the men's and women's Chelsea team will face a surprise activity~

With the email there was a boutton to accept and another one to refuse , I was hesitant to press accept but did it anyway thinking it might be fun.

Day: Friday

I was sitting at a table in a dark room immediately regretting having accepted, because I had to do the lie detector with Guro who was in the same team as me and also... Hakim and Mason.

<well guys we start with the first question which is just a test) said a man named Luke who was in charge of asking us the questions.

"What's your names?"

(Hakim) (Mason) (Y/n) (Guro) the man at the corner of the room goes the thumbs up we indicate that we were telling the truth.

About ten questions later they had Mason and Guro taken out of the room because they had both lied once leaving me with Hakim.

"Okay guys, only you two are left so we're going to spice things up a bit"

"Hakim this question is for you have you ever had a crush on anyone in the Chelsea women's team" I turn to Hakim who looked a little nervous, but he calmed down quickly before answering

"Yes" my heart was racing as I turned to the man who gave a thumbs up indicating that Hakim was telling the truth.

"wait, wait seriously? are you still it or it's in the past..." asked Luke

"actually I still am"

"ok ok, it's your turn Y/n you have the same question except it's about the men's team" I didn't know if I should answer hoping that the machine wouldn't work or tell the truth.

"I...same yes" I avoided Hakim's gaze while I was saying that, I knew that just by my expression he would have known who I was talking about. We had finally finished and could finally go home, while I was going out to my car someone called out to me.

"Y/n "I turn around to see Hakim running towards me, he stops and looks me straight in the eyes.

"Earlier, when you said you had a crush on someone in the men's team, you were talking about Mason, right?"

"Why do you think that?" Asking him I confuse.

"well you agreed to go to dinner with him tomorrow"

"yes, and I had also agreed to go to dinner with you but you didn't come" said I didn't cross my arms.

"he was lying to you, I was not in aclub I was training because Mason told the coach I needed to improve, he knew we weren't going to have dinner together so he did everything so that I don't show up, and you hate me" he said sincerely. there I knew he was telling the truth even without a lie detector , but I was upset because of what Mason did.

"Actually, when I said that earlier I wasn't talking about a Mason, I was talking about you" said shyly, I didn't know what he was going to answer to that and I was afraid of rejection, he grabbed my chin and lifted my head then... kissed me.

"I was talking about you too" he said to me " then? Do you still want to have dinner with Mason tomorrow or would you rather spend the day with me?"

"I choose the second option"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

That's it that's all.

Thank you for reading and see you soon for a new imagine. Send me your idea.

Lovee u💗

[livsspecialinterests]

don't really know what I'm writing or why but it's 0350am and I'm sitting in bed unable to get back to sleep having a weird slight panic

idk whether I'm feeling a bit of a writing slump because I know that the dead should stay dead still has quite a way to go and some part of me worries that by the time I've gotten at the very least to the next big plot point a lot of people may very well have lost interest in the fandom

like I know it's silly because there's probably always going to be some sort of fandom around BJTM but this little community means so much to me and has meant so much to me during a really difficult and life altering time, I mean for gods sake I started writing fics to try to figure out my own meltdowns

plus at this point I really have no other strong interests, idk maybe I'll get super into Doctor Who again with the specials and the new series starting but I've really gone hard on the One Interest

I really love the last few chapters of the dead should stay dead but it's felt a bit different writing them. maybe it's because I feel a little guilty spending whole days on chapters when I've got so much that I need to do for work (I know it sounds sad but there's exams, portfolio etc), plus I'd really like to give writing original fiction another go

there's also that gnawing fear that the fandom is going to like... vanish, which again is probably not true in its entirety but once the tour ends I can see some people falling off or finding another thing

also people leaving or drifting away from the fandom is a completely okay thing to do I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad if that's what they want to do

it's also not to say that people are obliged to engage with or comment on my fics or hell even read them, of course no one *has to* do anything in fandom it's a bunch of people just having fun

I know I should just write for my own fun and enrichment but external validation is nice, okay? plus these past few weeks the external validation and thinking 'no, I want to write this for the people who are reading the fic and want to know what happens next' have been big motivators

my main motivator used to be this absolutely unstoppable creative drive and love for the show and it's characters (which is still there, I'm unfortunately going to love this silly show until the day I die I think) but this past week I've found that I'd rather study for my work exams than spend time writing a few paragraphs

if I cool it off a little with the frequency of chapter updates it'll probably be a net good for me, I really need to buckle down and get these exams passed, I need to start actually engaging in planning my career because I think in my head I've been thinking I might get a book published one day and as a result I've been sort of half neglecting the actual really decent career I've got

but also my mental health is so much better, I've mostly healed from a lot of my late diagnosed autistic trauma, plus work is actually quite good right now?

maybe more of my writing for BJTM fics was motivated by being mentally ill than I originally thought, and maybe I don't *need* to write fics anymore but I want to and I want to still love writing fics as much as I did back when I was having that difficult time, where it was a huge personal comfort to be able to write Beej having a hard time in very specific ways and have other people comfort him

I have said to my husband that I'll probably cool it with the fics once I've finished the dead should stay dead and am going to focus my creative energy on something original to see where that goes but there's still so much to go on the dead should stay dead..

that silly little fic has become like my baby, I want to write it all, flesh out the characters before the next Big Thing happens, I want to do my ideas justice but I also want to make sure there are people still in the fandom to read it once I get to that point

again I'm super tired it's the middle of the night and I'm rambling, I don't want to imply that anyone reading this should carry on reading something they don't enjoy, and I don't even think the number of people reading the fic has even gone down, I've just woken up this morning full of dread for the fandom changing because, fandom and interests wise, BJTM is kind of all I've got right now.

I didn't really belong to a fandom for years after BBC Sherlock ended and I realised while watching the 4th series that it wasn't that good there was just a very passionate fan base and that's what I likes (I know, I know), BJTM was the first thing I got really into for ages and the first thing I got really into while figuring out what it was that I got *really into* stuff (autism)

obviously no one has to stick around in a fandom for the benefit of a silly autistic fanfic author whos terrified of change, and please, please don't think that's what I'm implying or what I want

ughh idk what I'm even writing, I should probably just reach out more to people but doing that is scary without the buffer of a fic

I should also probably invest more time in doing stuff irl but I know that no hobby gives me the joy that writing gives me, like when I'm really vibing with something there really are few better things for me than being safe at home and writing

also maybe I should try to get into some other stuff but I don't really want to but equally I know the BJTM fandom isn't going to last forever I just.... 🙃

the silly musical and the silly community that has sprung up around it and making art and writing fics for it has saved me in so many ways I'm just scaaarrreedddd (and also tired and typing this at 4am so I might be being dramatic for nothing, plus I know I struggle with assuming any fleeting emotion is going to last forever, maybe I'll feel different in a weeks time idk)

anyway I'm going to try to get a little bit more sleep because I've got to be up for work at 6 for my actual grownup job that I should probably pay more attention to

(this is also totally not some way to subtly say I'm not going to finish the dead should stay dead BTW, I love that fic and I'm proud of what it is and what I've got planned for it, so to the people who are still reading please don't worry 💜)