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#I WILL make assumptions because you came to a blog you know very well is run by a trans person-
charmedreincarnation · 11 months
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Hi charm I just one time say you’re one of the sweetest blog ever. Thank you for always taking the time to answer our asks and dms and always providing us with amazing challenges and advice! I used your three day challenge and I am now living my dream life, I am forever greatful 🌤
I used your three day challenge but two day ago something very bad happened and I dmed you. You said you were manifesting something at the time so you’ll just also affirm for me since it wouldn’t take much energy. I got in the void two days later. I don’t even know if you did affirm for me, but I trust you as a blogger and well this is Loa so my assumption hardened to fact and it worked. I came back to say thank you but your dms are now mutuals only so I’m sending this ask instead ❤️
Also I see you’re getting so much hate which is so dumb because if anons were actually nice and not entities they would realize most bloggers don’t mind helping us if we ask nicely. Anons aren’t just mean to you charm theyre cunts to everyone and on behalf of them to all bloggers I apologize! the community truly doesn’t deserve you guys, and you guys help so much with your posts and positivity! You guys also lend us so much of your time which you don’t have to! I know I’m sure not staying on tumblr or making a void blog. I’m gonna be selfish and live my life and anons should be grateful some people choose to stick the hell around for their annoying asses (myself included) LOOOL
Anyways I manifested
-stunning beauty and being skinny
-never gaining weight
-lucky girl syndrome
-wealthy family
-living in the suburbs of New York
-going to private school
-being the it girl
-confidence
-having all As
-never struggling with school
-being an amazing volleyball player
-perfect self concept
-never being afraid to defend people I care about
-bad bitch energy
-simps and admirers
-always receiving money
-master of the void state
I also want to add I had bad circumstances. I was bullied because I was poor&ugly, and I had adhd and anxiety so I struggled in school. That all just made me want it more. If going through that means you get to find the void and live better and easier than those born with the privilege don’t falter and persist. It’s worth, and I’m forever happy and grateful now.
Omgg periodt, I love this for you !! But seriously don’t thank me you had to do all the work I promise, so don’t sell yourself short!! And yes I heavily agree,with your last paragraph! you’re gonna keep living your best life and you deserve it, we all do🫶🫶🫶
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kyomaakuma7 · 9 months
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After a very long break I’ve come to finally say my share. For those who want to know in more depth how I feel about the full situation I am writing it down below.
Thank you for everyone who sent kind messages and comforting words and thank you most to my good friend @thisanimatedphantom and Kou who supported me through these hard times.
My statement on the Situation
When I started in Inky Mystery, I never thought that it would  get me to where I am today with the friends that I have now.  When I was first introduced to it, and reading it I was immediately entranced into the story and wanted nothing more but to illustrate it since I had already planned to remake the original. Seeing such a well-crafted story I knew that this would be the story that I would illustrate. (And TAP knows how much work and behind the scene illustrating I’ve been doing from character turnarounds, layout design, alphabet style, and etc.)
Soon I made the first blog and received overwhelming support which I had not originally imagined would come with making my first post, and to that I am grateful. Soon I befriended the author of InkyMystery as our friendship grew, so did the attention that I received with the comics that I was illustrating for them. Unfortunately deleted against my wishes, and after trying to get it back to no avail I created a new blog where I had to restart from the beginning. This process was not easy and for those who know me, I was completely devastated by the fact that I had lost that account. After making my new account with the support of TAP I started my journey again.
Unfortunately with the positive attention comes negative attention. Soon the posts started to gain traction again, and people started to come under the assumption that I was TheGreatRouge making their come back.  What people failed to acknowledge and do was to do further research on was whether or not I actually was. As you can assume I am not them. In fact, I do not like TheGreatRouge. Their content was some thing that I consumed in great mass when I was younger, but soon realized that a lot of the things that they made were toxic and I distanced myself from that. Since then, I have gained certain opinions from on this creator. Nonetheless, I do not find it acceptable that people are taking this approach, even if they do think that I am them.
The words that were said to me in my inbox, comments, and direct messages are not things that I will repeat here. What you should know is that a lot of these things were pertaining to me being a disgusting vile human who should take my own life. As someone who struggles with depression, this was a personal hit to home and it cause my mental health to decline drastically. And I spent days going through and deleting these.
At first, I did not speak out on the issue and distance myself from my friends until eventually I came back and told them what was happening. TAP felt for me and as you may know when they made a post about it which I appreciate greatly along with comforting me and encouraging my break.
I took a long break from working on the comic, along with interacting with the community which worried a lot of people, but it was necessary for me to do since it was harming me so much. I am officially coming back and I will be more active on this account since I don’t have to follow it as a mainly Inky Mystery account.
My final statement on the situation is that even though I am not TheGreatRouge under no circumstances is it acceptable to tell somebody to take their own life or attack somebody on social media just because your beliefs do not align with theirs. No matter how wrong it is, it is not acceptable. If you think that doing those things are OK then you’re not welcome in my space. Please leave.
Thank you and I hope to continue doing this since I love it so much <3
-Sincerely, KyomaAkuma
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lansplaining · 8 months
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Hi! I read your blog like the newspaper, it always has quality takes. I'm asking this because I haven't finished reading the book yet, is Jiang Cheng like. Actually homophobic in it? More than the normal level of the world he's in? I've seen this take so many times and I have a feeling it's bs but I can't confirm yet.
(if it stems from being annoyed wangxian scream that they really want to sleep with each other during a hostage situation, well. I believe that's called being normal.)
THIS MADE MY DAY i had to bask in that opening part before replying TT__TT
and then i wanted to find you a properly sourced and cited answer to the second part but I'm just gonna wing it and can bring receipts later if you want
basically, no. as you say, there is a baseline level of homophobia in the world that a lot of people ignore, and jiang cheng doesn't seem to be exempt from it, but he doesn't display it any more dramatically than jin ling or, you know, wei wuxian himself
i think what it actually comes from isn't the temple scene, but the scene at the jiang family shrine. basically, we learn that jiang cheng followed lan wangji and wei wuxian when they snuck away from lotus pier, and came across them in a semi-compromising position, then followed them to the shrine and saw them making what wei wuxian in his own head considers preliminary wedding bows. we get a lot of narration about how furious jiang cheng is about this, and he accuses them of sneaking off to go canoodle in not very friendly terms, but the one who interprets this through a homophobic lens is wei wuxian-- he gets angry, assuming that lan wangji will be offended at being thought to be a cutsleeve (lol). but even he isn't actually ascribing any particular homophobic motive to jiang cheng, he is internalising his culture's homophobia and assuming that lan wangji will be offended. his default assumption is that jiang cheng thinks them being gay would be a bad thing, but that's almost entirely based off of the baseline prejudice of their society, not anything specific jiang cheng says, though probably reinforced by the fact that jiang cheng is angry.
but as ever, once you peer through the obfuscation of wei wuxian's unreliable narration, it's so obvious that them being gay is not what jiang cheng is angry about! he's angry about them sneaking off, he's angry that wei wuxian won't speak to him or answer his questions or face the jiang and yet will embrace lan wangji and sneak him into the jiang family shrine to get kinda married. it's not about them being gay, it's about his overall anger at being ignored by wei wuxian
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thefallennightmare · 1 year
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Moment of Weakness-twenty two
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*credit to whoever created the gif. found on google/Pinterest *
Pairings: Mob!Bucky Barnes x reader
Warnings: language, smut, angst, fluff, affair, cheating, violence.
Summary: Reader is the assistant to New York's most feared mob boss, James Buchanan Barnes. He had the picture-perfect life: status in the mob, friends, and beautiful wife. So why can't he keep his mind and eyes off of reader?
Author's Note: I'm so, so, so, sorry 😩
Tags(closed): @splendidreads @sebsgirl71479 @mdpplgtz03 @pattiemac1 @unaxv @alana4610 @broadwaybabe18 @themayzittcha @playboystark @raajali3 @ozwriterchick @ragamuffin285 @screamingdying @themorningsunshine @kenziekugler22 @calwitch @sebastianstansqueen @stanaddict @stucky-simp03 @sleyeveryday @loustan90 @lyra-black13 @valsworldofcreativity @cjand10 @tesseract69 @batprincess1013 @subwaysurf45 @arsonfrogger @yoruse @5moremin @lipstickandtanqueray @mandijo17 @joannaromanoff @justsebstan @winters1917 @elizacusi-blog @football1921 @elxvrr
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The car door slammed behind me as I fumed with anger, the steam cascading over the windows. I tried to steady my breathing, deep breath in then deep breath out. I did this a few times until I felt all of my anger dissipate through my body. Being alone with Bucky had brought up so many past feelings that I knew if I didn’t force myself to leave, it would have ended with us naked on his couch. 
Not wanting to drive quite yet, I spent the last few minutes browsing my phone when a post from Natasha on instagram popped up. My breath caught in my throat, the ultrasound staring back into my face. 
Twelve weeks today!
I read the caption a few more times, something not quite sitting right in my gut about this whole thing. There was confusion on the dates; she told me almost two months ago that she was six weeks so shouldn’t she be at the very least 14 weeks? Also, the fact that I swore I saw her at Big Mike’s bar earlier today but couldn’t prove it, the lighting being too dark. 
Curiosity got the best of me and I took a screenshot of the picture, deciding to look it up online. I wanted to be completely sure with my assumption before making an ass out of myself in front of Bucky. 
“I fucking knew it!” I exclaimed, my voice echoing throughout my small car. 
The picture that Natasha posted had immediately shown up on google, at least thirty pictures, with the same position of the fetus and everything. The only difference, she must have photoshopped her info on the sonogram. A women's clinic in town had it posted on their website which must have been where Natasha found it. 
She was faking the pregnancy. But why? 
Unless she found out about the divorce and thought it would be the only way to keep Bucky? 
Or.
“Oh, fuck!” I cursed, the realization slamming into me like a freight train. 
Natasha knew about Bucky and I. 
I saw Bucky’s car was still in the parking lot so I bolted from my car back inside of the office, his name falling from my lips. 
He quickly came out of his office, eyes filled with worry. “What’s wrong?” 
“She knows.” 
Bucky raised a brow. “What?” 
I sighed while tossing my things back onto my desk. “Natasha knows about us.” 
His pupils went wide for a moment. “How do you know?” 
I gnawed on the inside of my cheek because I wasn’t entirely sure on how to bring this up without making him upset. 
“I can’t,” I shook my head. “I can’t tell you exactly how I know but trust me, Natasha knows about the affair.” 
Bucky ran a hand over his jaw and let out an annoyed breath. “You want me to trust you?” 
My head shook feverishly but did nothing to assure him. 
“You’re being ridiculous, Y/N,” Bucky turned his back to me and went back into his office. 
I scoffed loudly. “Excuse me?” 
He sat on his couch while I came to a halt in front of him, hands on my hips. 
“How well do you trust Natasha?” 
Bucky’s lips twitched. “She’s my wife.” 
“Seriously? This is why I can’t tell you!” I exasperated. 
He stretched his arms over the back of the couch. “You have this thought that Natasha knows about us but won’t tell me what makes you think that. 
I shifted on my feet. “Can you promise to listen to everything I have to say?” 
When he nodded, I took a deep breath in an effort to gain the courage I had been seeking. 
“I think she’s faking her pregnancy.” 
Bucky leaned his elbows on his knees, jaw clenching with anger. “What?” 
“Okay, so.” I began to pace around the office, unable to look him straight in the eyes; his piercing blue eyes. “Nothing about it makes sense. When you first told me about the pregnancy, you said she was a few months along but when I saw her a few days later, she said she’s only a few weeks along.” 
“Today, she posted a picture of her sonogram and said she was three months today but that doesn’t make sense, she should be almost five months.” 
I stopped in my tracks momentarily to look at Bucky, who simply watched me with a raised brow. 
“Then I swear I saw her at Big Mike’s bar drinking. Or, well it looked like it was her. It was too dark inside so I’m not one hundred percent sure.”
Bucky slowly raised to his feet while placing his hands on his hips. “Are you done?” 
I nodded while taking a breath, needing more oxygen after rambling for the last couple minutes. 
“You’re only saying this because you’re upset that I decided to stay with Natasha.” Bucky said.
I sneered with my top lip curled. “Did you forget that I was the one that decided to end things?” 
His brow raised at me. “So why are you even here, Y/N? To tell me lies in hopes I divorce Natasha so you can get what you want?” 
My eyes stung with his words, welling with tears. “That’s not why I brought this up. I thought you should know that she’s lying to you and it's because she knows about us. She’s trying to do whatever she can to keep you.” 
“The only proof you have is a gut feeling,” Bucky pinched his eyes shut with a sigh. “I can’t bring this up to her without it.” 
“Can’t you trust my word? I wouldn’t lie about something like this, Bucky.” I pleaded. 
He looked at his feet with his head hung low. “She doesn’t know about us. We were always so careful.” 
My fingers itched to reach for him, forcing him to look into my eyes to see that I was telling the truth. Our personal feelings aside, Bucky didn’t deserve to be lied to. I only wished I had some sort of proof. 
“Bucky,” I breathed while grabbing his hand to give it a squeeze. 
He finally looked up and my breath hitched when he stepped closer towards me, his body heat engulfing around us in our own personal bubble. 
“You don’t deserve this,” I told him. 
“Doll,” Bucky’s voice cracked. 
The magnetic pull between us had returned and With a quick low scoop of lips, he pressed them against mine and I froze for a second before melting into him, my hands quickly finding his hair. Bucky’s vibranium hand grasped my cheek to deepen the kiss; his tongue wrapped around my own. 
“No!” I pushed him away. “Why did you do that?!” 
Bucky reached for me but I responded by smacking him, hard, across his face. His eyes darted down to the ground while licking his lips, teeth digging into his bottom one.  
“Stop it!” 
The tears fell from my eyes as I ran a shaking hand through my hair. “I shouldn’t have come back inside.” 
“I’m sorry, doll. I know it’s wrong but it feels so right being with you.” 
I pushed his chest hard which made him stumble back onto his couch. “I don’t care! You can’t continue to have your wife and me on the side. I know she’s faking the pregnancy but that doesn't mean she continues to deserve this.” 
“For once in your life, Bucky. You don’t get whatever you want,” I cried while wiping the tears away. 
“If you bring me proof that she’s lying, I’ll go through with the divorce,” Bucky said. 
I stared at him, dumbfounded, and slowly shook my head. “I shouldn’t have to do that. If you loved me like I love you, you would trust what I’m saying.” 
Bucky blinked, my confession not going over his head like I wished it would. “Wh-what?” 
“I love you, Bucky even though I tried not to fall for you because I knew what it only meant in the end.” 
I motioned between us. “You said it yourself; you can’t love people easily.” 
“I’ll try-.” 
“Don’t you get it?!” I screamed, interrupting him. “I can’t keep doing this! I did my best to be strong around you, tried to go back to normal but the second I’m alone with you I throw everything out the window. All I want to do is kiss you, love you, but I can’t because you won’t leave her!” 
There were fresh tears streaming down my face as I choked out a sob. This was something I feared to do, not wanting to leave everyone I met here behind. But I knew, deep in my gut, that mentally I couldn't stay any longer. 
“I quit.” I managed to get out through the sobs. 
Bucky was fast on his feet. “You don’t have to leave, Y/N.” 
“I do,” I cried. “Because if I stay, it’s only going to bring me more pain and my heart can’t handle any more.” 
“Please,” he begged while reaching for me. 
I stepped away from him and with tears trailing into my mouth, bitter tears stinging my tongue, I gave him the best smile I could. 
“All I ask is that you don’t call me, begging to come back, when you find out she was lying to you. You could have been happy with me, Bucky. I could have loved you till my last breath.” 
Without looking back to see his own tears falling, I let the cries flow through me in waves finally saying goodbye to someone I should have a long time ago.
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citronbun · 6 months
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different anon but an old post on your blog got suggested to me via tumblr algorithm - I've never visited your blog before so idek why - but it is so silly to me to pretend to not be a fan of an actor "like that" when your entire account is dedicated as a shrine to them. "CE characters" means you like CE, not the characters, the characters share nothing in common and you only like them because of the actor. Why lie and pretend otherwise lol? For a false facade of cool ironic detachment? You like him, or else you wouldn't dedicate hundreds upon hundreds of hours of time and labor to him. That is no small act, you work harder than a disciple lol
ಠ_ಠ
This is such a dumb take and you clearly show a huge lack of understanding that it’s absolutely possible to separate the characters from the actor … You made a lot of assumptions about me and so I’m going to be very thorough about this.
First and foremost, you don’t know me. I have drawn and still draw other things from time to time. Just because I have this account that I post once a week on does not make it my whole meaning of life.
How is me spending my free time to draw his fictional characters any different from the hours people spend on creating for other fandoms ? That is how fandoms work, - we create and share and make each other feel happy. It is terribly unfair of you to say I am making a shrine and being a disciple for Chris, as if it’s all for him. Do you think fan fic writers write smutty fics of his characters in ‘honour’ of him ?
This may be a crazy thought, but I think the reason why people write smut for Steve is because they are thirsting for Steve …
Like its fairly obvious we create for within our circle of fandom, not for Chris. Honestly (ಠ_ಠ) …
Second, I don’t labor to him, I enjoy drawing his characters, which I wouldn’t have grown to like as much if it wasn’t for the fan fictions by the way. Chris is hot and I am very attracted to him, but that does not mean my attraction moves further beyond that. I don’t even like ALL of his characters, it’s a selective few that I’ve come to like very much based on my taste. He plays himbos, bad guys and DILFs, my greatest weaknesses …
The whole ‘you drawing CE characters means you like CE, not the characters’ made me loose brain cells … like that makes zero sense. If it was Chris Evans I liked and not the characters, I would just draw him and not his characters … make it make sense, anon.
A little backstory: I first came to like Steve Rogers and Johnny Storm later (because Marvel) and then I was like “you know, this man makes me feel aroused just by looking at him so let me take a look at other movies he’s in”, and then it just happened that I liked more of his characters.
And obviously I acknowledge Chris is a person of his own but I can’t help it that I only care for his looks and how it’s a bonus he makes good performance. He is a real life celebrity which makes me automatically disinterested in him.
Perhaps I’m considered a ‘fan’ since I have consumed and like some of the movies he is in but I still don’t care for him ‘that way’, = I don’t care about his personal life, him as a person, where he ends up. If any time his career crashes I will not be there to feel sad for him because he is just another wealthy actor. I am satisfied with the characters we have gotten out of him so far and it’s them I care about.
If it’s still so hard to believe that I am able to detach the characters from Chris, then you may worry about it yourself. I feel like I have explained this as well as I can now.
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shkika · 9 months
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[RECORDED BROADCAST : 1681.662] - PRIVATE Seven Red Suns, Chasing Wind
CW: Have you had any contact with Five Pebbles recently?
SRS: Not in a long while actually! Unless worrying about him counts.
CW: One of his neighbors, Unparalleled Innocence, sent an overseer to his can and got some images. They were made public in the local group, in an effort to be mean I suppose. There's no other way of putting it he looks awful.
SRS: Tell me.
CW: He's got the rot, very badly. Big cysts have become mobile and are scattering down the west and middle legs. He does listen to you, and few others by now, so you should talk to him.
SRS: I will try to contact him. Does Moon know?
CW: Moon has been unavailable for some time.
[Pending upload to local group records by dispatched Overseer. Unit will enter read only state in 432 cycles.]
UI leaked pebbles rot images in the local group, but suns didn't know until CW told them, which might imply that they are not part of the local group
THIS DISCUSSION IS GOING!! I've gotten a bunch of asks about this along with tags and replies oh my. Just gonna state that Suns to me and in my ask-blog is part of the local group and honestly at this point even if James himself came up to told me I'm wrong I can't change that cause I set it up already ..? SO UHH hm
ANYWAY LET'S RAMBLE!!
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I honestly think the strongest pointer to the implication that SRS isn't part of the local group is the fact they didn't know about Pebbles' situation first. So Chasing Wind had to tell them!
I see it! I've always made the assumption they just weren't active in the local group messages (just like how we haven't seen a single word about Innocence in the game even if she's canonically closest to Moon and Pebbles out of the others)
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^ Especially, because I assumed this meant that UI spread the information further than just the local group. Which! I don't know!
I don't think my assumption is FULLY baseless, just because of how the approach the conversation with NSH is?
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They're being vague about hurting someone. If the chats were in the local group, which NSH has access to, but SRS doesn't it feels so bizarre to me they'd try to vague point at it as if there's any chance NSH wouldn't have already seen. Like what hopes do you have buddy?? The fact that Pebbles has the rot and is in such a terrible condition is like uhm... well yeah.
Still they've never been active in a local group chat and it was through Chasing that they found out about the rot situation so I don't know!
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Also a good point!! Once again I read it differently! I thought the "She's very close to Five Pebbles" wasn't a descriptor, but more so a reason on why he's worried about her. "She's close to him (rot infested doofus) and I'm her friend man"
Them not knowing Moon very well isn't too much of evidence for either statement. What they did not understand about Moon is why she wouldn't force Pebbles to stop dead in his tracks and save her life. Which is an extremely valid question, because as his administrator she had the power to do so. NSH is a close friend of hers group or not and explains.
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They do still call her Big Sis Moon which is rather weird if you're not part of her local group? Aside also shortening her name to just Moon. (which could be either familiarity or convenience, no solid evidence)
They also got into contact with Five Pebbles VERY soon after he was put online according to SRS themselves which is possible both ways! Just felt more likely if they were part of the local group.
AND SPEARMASTER.
We don't know what "local group" means, but I always assumed, because of the name it partly meant distance.
Iterators are VERY far from each other, usually. Like quite far even local group wise. I assumed that for a slug cat like Spearmaster to have been capable to make the journey to Pebbles and back... and then do the same AGAIN, it meant that SM made a long journey, but one that was like... y'know not from one part of the continent to the other big.
I assume distance plays a role, because in a cream pearls..
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The implication is that Local groups held out together the longest.
I can't imagine this poor creature covering a such a massive worth of land on foot..!
SM was given the pearl inside their chest mainly for it to be hidden, but also as an instinct that's true! So they know where to go.
Hunter doesn't have that not because it isn't needed, but because NSH was rushing. As implied by these lines.
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NSH was rushing them so much they ended up with the rot, I doubt there was any time left to perfect a homing instinct or do much of anything really. I think NSH is probably closer than SRS (just for poor Hunter's sake honestly), but I don't know by how much really- iterators seem to be built PRETTY far from each other. The only other closest neighbor is UI. Which means NSH is farther than her.
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But either way yeah. I've dug info for a WHILE now I can't seem to find any super solid evidence for either. I'm just sharing my interpretation as always. You can headcanon either one of these and call them canon in my book really.
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aihoshiino · 5 months
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hello!!! you have no idea how hard it is (for me at least haha) to find a blog that talks about ai even semi consistently let alone analyze her this closely so i enjoy ur blog very much! thank you for feeding my ai brainrot :D
anyways any thoughts on ai and hikaru’s relationship? or just speculation since theres not much on it rn? its pretty fascinating to me, they were both children who were abused and exploited as a whole (that and their own respective fucked up relationship and idea of sexual intimacy which might be one of the catalysts for them jumping to sex so quickly despite both (i think?) being aware of the consequences with them being relatively active in the entertainment industry and what not) so its not too hard to imagine them potentially bonding even if it never quite reached genuine love romantic or otherwise
HAPPY TO PROVIDE, ANON! <3 I fully admit that my ramblings are mostly for my own benefit because if I don't talk about Hoshino Ai at least twice a day I will turn into the Oshi no Joker but it's always so nice to hear folks are glad to be along for the ride.
Hikaru and Ai's relationship has always been really fascinating to me, though! It's kind of an interesting subversion on some of our and Aqua's ingrained assumptions about the kind of person the twins' father would be – there's this sort of implicit, unspoken understanding based on the way Aqua focuses primarily on men who were already adults when Ai got pregnant that Ai was victimized in some way which resulted in the twins. Finding out who Hikaru is and the fact that he and Ai were peers immediately casts all of Ai's decisions regarding him in a hugely different light and raises a lot of questions about things that we otherwise assumed went without saying.
That said, given that we know so little about both their relationship and Hikari himself as a person, it's kind of hard to make solid guesses! I sort of have a rough shape of what I imagine it was like in my head just based on Hikaru's emotional function in the story VS what we know about him specifically as a person – Hikaru is very clearly intended to be a sort of bad end/dark mirror of Aqua, so I like to think that his and Ai's relationship probably contained echoes of the two main Aqua romances we see play out in the present. I had like a huge and honestly kind of incomprehensible ramble here originally while I tried to define what I meant by that but then I realized the series itself already lays it out...
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In Hikaru, Ai found someone she thought would finally understand and accept her.
In Ai, Hikaru saw light.
Ai is tied to stars and light constantly through the series while also being tied to Kana pretty strongly as well, so I think it makes sense for her to be the Kana/light equivalent in this relationship. Uh, of course, I think I have accidentally implied that this means Akane is paralleling Hikari, so let's move on................................
It's also interesting to take into account 45510 when trying to pick up some info about how this relationship went. The stream at the center of this story is dated just after Ai came back from her hiatus following the birth of the twins, so around when she was 16/17 years old -- closer to the latter and so likely two or three years after her relationship with Hikaru fell apart. With that in mind, Ai's words here feel kind of... I guess, accidentally revealing? In some interesting ways.
When asked to describe her ideal type for a lover, Ai says: ""I guess I'd like to be with someone who doesn't lose their cool with me when I mess things up, ‘cause that happens a lot! Someone who gets all worked up over every little thing would probably get tired of me pretty quick. It’d be unfair for them, so I'd rather be with someone who's not like that.""
And unprompted, she continues from there with this: ""Love is all about trust, isn't it? They call it... 'recipricity', I think? Like, if someone showed me they love me, I'd feel the same way about them. But, I'm a bit of a scaredy-cat. It's tough for me to really believe in words like 'love' and 'like.' I've never actually fallen in love with someone before, so I'm not even sure what it means, you know?""
This is FASCINATING knowing this is Ai on the other side of her relationship with Hikaru. We know that this is Ai's true feelings because even the 45510 narrator, who calls her a liar every time she so much as breathes, admits that she knows Ai is probably telling the truth here. If this is the case, then this basically confirms that however intense the HikaAi relationship was, she didn't feel as though she loved him, which matches with the snippets we've gotten from the DVD and the movie where Ai's parting/break up with Hikaru was centered on Ai admitting that she couldn't love him.
Of course, this doesn't necessarily mean that their bond wasn't genuine or that they didn't have real feelings for each other – I totally agree with your take that they probably gravitated towards each other as victims of abuse generally and CSA specifically and found a sort of comfort and solidarity in recognizing and licking each others' wounds. But obviously, things didn't work out and I think we have a lot of clues already what this fundamental misunderstanding was.
When Ai tells Hikaru "I can't love you" this is an apology, an admission of weakness and self-blame. What Ai is saying is I can't love you, because I'm broken and I can't love anyone.
What Hikaru likely hears is I can't love you because you're broken and nobody could.
That sense of rejection, combined with the trauma he already carried from his abuse would have been bad enough but that Ai got pregnant and broke up with him was likely hugely retraumatizing for him, ripping open the scars of his abuse at Airi Himekawa's hands. He may have even misconstrued Ai's actions as an act of abuse similar to Airi's and everything went spiralling from there.
I don't have any really solid shots to call, unfortunately! So much about Hikaru is up in the air right now, but I think he's a super interesting character and his and Ai's relationship is something I really, really want to eventually see more of.
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triple-a-aro · 4 months
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[TL;DR bullet point list at the end of this post if you don't feel like reading all this lmao. CW for discussions of transphobia towards transfems and transmascs, various forms of assault, and media transphobia]
So making this blog was a spur of the moment decision from clicking onto a blog that seemed very nuanced in the topics that I like reading about and then immediately turned out to have some very vitriolic opinions about butches, transmasculine people, and trans men (All accompanied by a wonderful side of tbros and transandrophobia truthers dni)
So I wanted to talk about that, I guess! The particularly egregious claim that I saw was that trans men/mascs do not experience assault rates anywhere near the levels of trans women/fems people.
I have seen similar claims here and there and seen, in turn, people who point out some possible flaws with it be dogpiled for dismissing trans women/fem's struggles so, instead of taking away from a post centered on trans women/fems, I want to make my own post on the rates of assault on trans men/mascs.
With that out of the way, I'd like to talk about some of the reasons that the rates of assault on trans men/mascs seem lower than trans women/fems (While not discounting their experiences)
When talking to my friends about these rates, I often hear the phrase "I just don't hear about it as often". My initial assumption was that that means that trans men must simply have lower rates, but in that case was I unlucky? My friends? Many, many trans men/mascs I know have, unfortunately, experienced assault in a way that (admittedly anecdotally) did not fit the trend in common reporting.
I came up with three different explanations that probably all contribute in one way or another, and are as follows:
Trans women/fems are more likely to be reported as, well, trans than trans men/mascs
Emasculation of assault survivors
Trans men/mascs being held to gendered expectations.
To elaborate: 1. Trans women/fems are more likely to be reported as, well, trans than trans men/mascs
While trans men/mascs are definitely included in the general transphobic attitudes, it is almost never as men. Trans men/mascs are almost always "confused, indoctrinated girls" who are "mutilating and damaging their bodies with hormones and surgeries". Whenever talked about, I always see trans men/mascs never referred to as men but as hopeless women.
Trans women/fems, on the other hand, are almost always referred to as trans women (or other, far more derogatory terms, but they almost always indicate transness). Unfortunately, trans women/fems are the main punching bag of transphobia right now, and but the attention on them almost always centers around them being, well, trans.
Therefore when reporting on assault, the media will find it far more sensationalist to report trans women/fems as trans for selling points and clicks rather than as just women. Trans men/mascs, though, I find are far more likely to just be referred to as women, even by progressive areas because it fits the "women experience more assault" statistics. (Not to say that's untrue. But we can prove that without fudging the numbers guys c'mon)
2. Emasculation of assault survivors
Regardless of agab, male assault survivors are less likely to speak up about it due to the surrounding culture and general cultivated toxic masculinity in today's culture. Trans men/mascs are not immune to toxic masculinity. I myself am unlearning some very unhealthy attitudes and behaviours that I learned while coming into my identity as a man.
That included stopping burying my own history of having been assaulted beforehand; At the peak of my indoctrination into desperately trying to prove that I was "manly" enough to be considered a man, I was actively trying to act like it never happened.
While again anecdotal, you do not have to search far for similar stories, especially in cisgender men who have survived assault (be it sexual or not)
3. Trans men/mascs being held to gendered expectations
Both tying into point 2 and general transphobia against trans men/mascs, gendered expectations from both men and women often end up applying to trans men/mascs. Many of the double gender standards apply to trans people of any agab or gender, but I think this affects trans men/mascs in a particularly harrowing way.
For example: A trans man has been assaulted. He wants to talk about it, but is currently finding himself belittled by other men if he does. He goes to a queer space to speak up about it and is given support - But it's support aimed at feminine people, because the "afab experience" is supposedly so similar.
To conclude, I don't think this should have to be a debate. It isa good thing to acknowledge that trans people are often assaulted. But I don't think we should play oppression olympics 2, this time the trauma edition! Do not dismiss trans men/masc's struggles because "trans women have it worse". Thanks for reading.
Alright the TL;DR I promised, because I'm NOT a concise person lmfao
Trans men/mascs are reported as having lower assault rates than trans women/fems, but I do not think this reflect reality for 3 reasons.
Trans women/fems are more likely to be reported as, well, trans than trans men/mascs because of the transphobic vitriol against trans women (and it is therefore sensationalist to highlight the transness of trans women)
Many male assault survivors are HIGHLY emasculated, which could be off-putting for trans men/mascs to report any assault
Trans men/mascs being held to gendered expectations of both women and men, which is again off-putting to report assault.
This shouldn't need to be a debate of "who has it worse". What matters is that we are all united under a common transphobia, and we should not dismiss each other because "this group has it worse".
Trans men and mascs go give some love to your fellow trans people! Trans women and fems go give some love to your fellow trans people! The rest of the trans community go give some love to your fellow trans people! Let's spread some positivity, okay? Go take a drink of water and a nice break, if you can
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amazingmsme · 3 months
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Genuine question here, if the tickling thing isn't a fetish, why do you only seem to have headcanons for characters that are 18 and older? Is that just like.. a coincidence?
I literally JUST made headcanons for Hannah & Tim, I have headcanons for the stranger things characters, Peter Parker & friends, & when I watched Kipo I made headcanons for them as well, & I’m sure there’s other ones I’m forgetting, so uh, maybe do some research before you jump to conclusions
I do headcanons for the characters I’m asked about, & I write for the prompts I’m given (as well as some of my own ideas) but most of the stuff I watch tends to focus the plot on the older characters, & since they’re the main characters I guess the fandom wants to hear more about them
Just because you don’t like or understand something that others seem to enjoy doesn’t automatically make it sexual & I’m sick & tired of people acting like it does. I know I don’t speak for everyone & it can mean different things for different people, but my blog is & has always been sfw
I know I don’t have to, but these kinds of asks always make me feel like I have to defend myself & others who feel the same way. For me personally, I’m very touch starved, maybe even by my own doing. As a kid, I was in & out of hospitals constantly & it made me develop a fear of other people, touch & I got pretty bad claustrophobia. I isolated myself away & had very few friends growing up, & even the ones I did had were as far from physically affectionate as you could get. Somewhere along the way, I realized I really missed/craved this kind of soft, playful affection, but society has drilled it into everyone’s heads that tickling is weird & everyone hates it & that if you stray from that norm, then you’re the one who’s a freak & should feel ashamed. & until I found tumblr, I really was ashamed of this part of myself, specifically because of assumptions like these. I was 13 when I finally started to accept that this made me different, but then I realized that I wasn’t the only person out there who actually liked it, & I very very slowly started to accept it. I think I will always feel at least somewhat embarrassed or ashamed because of these common misconceptions & assumptions, but I’m far better off than that lonely, terrified kid I was before I found my community, & that’s all I can hope for others as well
Long story short: I do & have written headcanons & fics for characters of all ages, I just tend to focus on the characters I’m asked about, especially when it comes to headcanons. Not everything you don’t understand is a fetish, not everything that other people like is a fetish, but I know that it is for some
Sorry if this came off as snappy, but I’m really not in a good mood & I’m just tired of people always assuming every aspect of the tickle community is sexual
Some people just like to imagine their blorbos having fun with their loved ones & laughing to their heart’s content but I guess that really IS too much to ask jk but also not really
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Text
Words are being put in my mouth by some anonymous messages and some very unkind assumptions are being made.
Very long post under the cut-
I need all of you to understand that I'm playing this by ear. Longtime followers will know that every so often I will make a post about a new rule because something was brought to my attention.
Upon the creation of this blog, I had no idea what rules would be needed to foster a safe environment. Therefore, I added rules as things came up.
If memory serves, at the start of this blog, I didn't have any rules and that worked fine for quite a while because no one submitted anything that was harmful. As time went on, that of course didn't last and sadly people submitted things with slurs and other harmful language.
I admit I've made mistakes. A transmisogynistic slur made it onto this blog, which was quickly called out by a follower (thank you for that!) and I removed the submission in question.
When I posted my new pinned post with a list of rules and guidelines, I asked for input. I cannot predict every possible scenario so I admittedly rely on followers of this blog to call out things they think are inappropriate. Which is why when I received the recent message informing me that they found a submission to be offensive, I took it very seriously.
I will admit, I genuinely don't remember queuing the submission in question. It was likely submitted about two weeks ago and I have no idea what my thought process was when I saw it and accepted it. I don't want to make excuses, but I will say that I sometimes queue submissions when I'm not in a place where I should be doing so, such as when I'm extremely tired, or just woke up and still bleary, or after I've taken medication to make me sleepy.
I have made mistakes before when going through submissions when I shouldn't. I've accidentally posted things instead of queuing them, for example, or I've misread what someone wrote in a way that caused issues. I have been trying to do better about that as of late and not go through submissions when my judgement is impaired. I don't know if that was the case for the submission in question. I genuinely don't know. I am just sharing some of the mistakes I've made in the past and telling you I will try to do better in the future.
Though I don't remember my thoughts when I queued the submission in question, I do remember queuing other posts that made me personally uncomfortable when I read them.
I'm a bit torn here, which I tried to voice in my other posts on the subject. On one hand, I want people to feel free to talk about their thoughts and feelings. But on the other, I don't want those thoughts or feelings to cause harm to others. I've queued posts that made me personally uncomfortable (because I felt they insulted something about me) because I didn't want to censor people here. I didn't know how or if I should make a rule about such things. I didn't know how to handle it, so I went ahead and queued things that I found offensive to me personally, hoping that if others found it offensive as well they would let me know. Since no one did, I hoped that meant that I alone was made uncomfortable and thus it was an okay thing to have on the blog.
When the submission in question was brought to my attention initially, I immediately felt uncomfortable in how it was worded. I'm not fond of anything that calls something or someone gross.
I asked for suggestions on how to handle the subject on the initial post because, as I stated earlier, I do rely on followers of this blog to tell me how things make them feel and suggest ways to improve. This is a blog for the community so I always prioritize feedback, especially when I genuinely don't know how to handle the situation.
As stated earlier, I don't want to censor people's experiences. This is a place people should feel free and open to talk about their monsterfucker journey. But at the same time, I do not want the sharing of those experiences to hurt others. Which is why I asked for input. I received a lovely suggestion about making a rule that essentially means "don't yuck someone else's yum" and that is what I added to the list of rules and guidelines.
Ideally, I want people to be able to voice their preferences in a way that doesn't insult others. I hope that in the future, that can be done.
As for the deleting of the submission in question: I've been accused of deleting it in order to hide the full situation. That is not true at all. I deleted it because it was offensive to multiple people. I have not deleted any posts on the subject. I am not trying to hide anything I've said or done.
And in fact, I haven't deleted the post at all. It's been made private. You can view it here, if you wish to have a full understanding of the situation.
As for the other accusation thrown my way:
I don't think I ever stated that "this is a you problem." The post in question made me uncomfortable as well when it was brought to my attention and I 100% agree that it was inappropriate and offensive.
My issue with one of the messages I received is that I simply disagree that discussions about the human body are off topic for the subject of monsterfucking. A suggestion was made that I should have a blanket ban on any mentions of the human body in a positive, neutral or negative light and I cannot get on board with that as I feel that in many cases our views of human bodies influences our monsterfucking journey.
I hope future submissions can word such influences in ways that are not insulting to other people. I will do my best to not accept submissions that are worded similarly to the one in question.
Thank you all for your feedback and patience during this situation. I am always trying to improve this blog so that it is a place for all sorts of monsterfuckers to come together and share their thoughts. I apologize for not always succeeding in this and I do genuinely greatly appreciate when people call out my mistakes so that I can endeavor to do better in the future.
💖
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thelonesomequeen · 4 months
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I think the anons are reacting this way because of how you are now friends with Maddy after everything she’s done to you and how she acted towards everyone claiming the relationship was real
I have nothing against you both but it does make me side eye you both seeing the interaction between you and her after the things she has done to this fandom
Not that we owe anyone an explanation, but we keep seeing people make incorrect assumptions about all of this. So here’s the reader’s digest condensed version of the last few months. Here’s the tea so many of you are desperate for. How did we get friendly with Maddy?
Some of you already know about this, but others don’t because we mainly stayed quiet about it. Over the summer one of the delulus in this fandom hacked our blog. As in we were locked out and someone else had complete control of our page and access to everything. They attempted to doxx us as well as others in the fandom. This is around the same time other people were deleting blogs and leaving tumblr because they were also being doxxed and threatened off the platform. We luckily discovered the hacking pretty quickly and were able to get our page back with the help of Queen, our OG mod. So when people say we “faked the return of Queen” that just isn’t true. She came back to help us through the hacking.
After we got the blog back, we started reaching out to other blogs to ask if they knew anything about who was behind the other doxxing/hacking situations that were taking place in the fandom because we figured it had to be the same person behind all of it. Some people shared as much as they knew, others could care less about what happened and clearly knew more but refused to share (it was obvious, and also disappointing when some of these people were acting friendly with us), and some blogs we were friendly with recommended we reach out to other blogs who might be able to help us get to the bottom of everything.
There were 2 blogs that were really huge in helping us out and took a lot of time out of their lives to talk with us and share what information they had about who was going after others in the fandom. We genuinely still appreciate that effort. (And we still appreciate the effort of other blogs, who spoke with us during that time too). I’m not sure if one of the blogs wants to be named (we’ll reach out and ask them before tagging them) and the other was Maddy. And when we say they put in a lot of effort, we mean they seriously went above and beyond to try and help us figure out who was behind this attack. We initially didn’t contact Maddy right away. As we were talking to other blogs we kept getting a lot of “this sounds like what happened to Maddy a few months ago” from numerous blogs. When we asked those blogs if they had more info about that situation (because we missed it happen) they didn’t. So we talked amongst ourselves and decided to reach out to Maddy to see if she would be willing to talk to us about what happened to her to compare it to our situation. We honestly expected her to give us the middle finger and block us immediately, and we wouldn’t have blamed her for it if she did, but we figured trying couldn’t hurt. I don’t remember the exact wording of our first message to her, but I know it was something along the lines of “hey, this is probably a surprise and if you decide to just block us, we totally get it and that’s cool but here’s what just happened to us…” and we explained the situation. And Maddy was very cool about the message and was willing to talk with us and help us because some situations are beyond petty fandom drama. This was no longer fandom wars or whatever, this was real and personal lives getting affected now.
We got to talking further during this entire situation and apologies were issued. Direct apologies for things done and said on both sides. There was complete ownership of all the drama that had gone down in the previous months all the way around. We understand some of you don’t want to grant any type of fandom forgiveness and that is your choice. It’s your business. Just like it’s our own business to deny or accept an apology given directly to us.
Yes, I think we were all initially wary of each other at the start, but the more we talked, the more I think both of us realized we just had each other pegged wrong from the beginning and neither of us were as bad as the other initially thought. Are we still feeling after affects of things said about us on her blog? Sure. Just like she feels those after affects too. But that’s where the apologies and ownership come in to place. Are there things she post that we don’t agree with or things that we post that she doesn’t agree with? Sure. But we also understand it’s not our business to tell each other how to run our respective blogs.
And because it hasn’t really been said, I’ll say it now, if following along with the drama became too much for you or you directly or indirectly became involved in it, we are sorry and we’re apologizing to you all now. I think the whole thing has taught us that sometimes it’s better to chat with people in a space that isn’t public to iron out our differences instead of hashing it out publicly. We’re not always going to get everything right, but we’re trying to be better and do better. So again, we do apologize for the drama we were apart of and subjected everyone else to in the process.
If it bothers you we’re friendly and interact, that’s your very valid opinion. We aren’t here to tell you how you should feel because that’s YOUR experience as an observer of what’s going on in the fandom. What I can tell you is there are a lot of people in this fandom (and no, we won’t name names) who judge us for interacting with each other now who have done and said FAR worse things to us who have never sent an apology our way or even attempted to have a conversation with us to clear the air. Maddy at least had the balls to own up to things said. That’s more than I can say for a lot of the wolves in sheep’s clothing running around this fandom quietly causing issues and getting away with it unscathed.
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sundropglass · 5 months
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My old best friend was someone I made a public fuss about. They always had a special tag on my blogs and I’d tag them in things that reminded me of them. They quietly resented me for it. I think maybe I didn’t know them as well as I thought and pushed an idea of them on them. I think that I annoyed them with too much pestering. When they cut me off I was really blindsided and hurt by it. They just never communicated with me.
I’m scared now of making my friends resent me by building up assumptions about what they’d like or who they are. I’m shy around nicknames and associations and making a public fuss. I’d been choking out the ways I knew how to love because someone I cared for was hurt by it. I’m always flailing wondering what to do and if theres secret resentments from people who say they care about me
With Chime I was and am healing. That was what Chimecore was always; at the root, a public protest to the damage we’d both been dealt over and over. This time I was on a receiving end too, which is new and very healing.
Then I guess with Lee that thing came true again. Despite multiple explicit conversations about how okay we were, I’ll never know what the actual issue was. They refused to talk to me. And that’s fine. If you check on me, I’m sorry if it was something like this I did and was blind to again.
I’m trying again with -core tags, a more public statement of claiming my friends to be mine. Again, a protest. Again, mending fresh damage. If that’s problematic to you, then you are the problem. This time I’m including Fable because I got the explicit okay to. I don’t want the loss of friends make me pull away from the ones I know I have again.
If we talk in private as it is and you’d like for me to have a tag for you, please do reach out and let me know. I don’t want to immediately assume it’s okay
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bootobeneficiary · 2 years
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Hi can you explain your post about needing a man? I found you from your response from the girl trying to be funny (you gathered her! she was trying to be condescending and im glad you stood on your response) and though i agree with you, i would like to know how to explain it and def insight on why you insist on it being a need. Thankssss💕💕💕💕💕
Lmfao I’m lowkey embarrassed but sort of proud of myself. I don’t like coming out of character especially on my blog but the gworls like to cosplay as gurus and I just didn’t appreciate the tone nor the bold assumptions. It’s a new day so I digress and I’m thankful for the opportunity to explain why I personally choose to need a man.
Please view the original post for reference.
Why I Need A Man…PERSONALLY(!)
First of all, I assumed anyone with common sense can tell I didn’t literally state I needed a man, since I went straight into detail from the first sentence on why I need a husband in particular. “I need a man” was just the caption…not the subject. The subject of the post from text to moodboard was marriage and me breaking the generational cycle of hyper independence “both by societal force and personal choice”.
I choose to need a man because I am growing from the mindset of never needing one. Ever. To be honest, I didn’t grow up in an environment of healthy relationships, let alone marriages. My parents are the epitome of toxic.
I don’t want a man. I want a Porsche. I want a property in South Africa. I need those specific Jimmy Choo shoes for my wedding. Again, like ol girl said, a want and a need is two different things. The difference is that my wants allow room for me to receive something else, something better, or sometimes nothing at all for my protection, even if it’s a slight delay. I want a Porsche, but I don’t necessarily need one. I want a property in South Africa, but if Kenya is more beneficial for my legacy then I don’t need any property in SA. I need those Jimmy Choos shoes or I’m not walking down the aisle, or if I do it’s barefooted.
I need a man for a variety of reasons. I need a man because I want to become a mother and I need a man to conceive…right? “I want a man to have kids” No. I need a man. In particular, I need a husband since I don’t desire to be pregnant and engaged nor one’s baby mother. I want to plan couple’s trips, therefore I need a husband…eventually. I want to experience a wedding with African traditions such as throwing money during the reception…therefore I need a husband, eventually. That was really my only point.
You see the difference? Full transparency, my toxic trait is flaunting my intelligence and education is one’s face when I’m falsely corrected. There’s a clear difference between a want and a need and that’s the emphasis. It’s psychological to subconsciously fuel me to work on myself (aka healing) to prepare for becoming a loving, healthy, valuable wife and mother to reciprocate what I’m asking for.
I want to make it very clear that I’m not here for my post to resonate with most. In fact, most of y’all will disagree because I disagree with most of y’all! That’s what inspired me to become active on my blog to create a brand and not just a digital diary.
Thank you for this ask because I definitely don’t want to share anything, advice or not that’ll misguide anyone. You should never “need” a man, but don’t let nobody especially no random ass blog try to throw dirt on your journey because they don’t agree personally. That’s their personal problem, not yours. Stay focused. It’s absolutely ok to place priority on whatever that may add value to the legacy you need, a spouse included.
I need a man…eventually. That doesn’t mean anyone needs to as well.
Hope this clarifies my original post! Thank you for the support and understanding where I came from
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indigo-scarf · 5 months
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20 questions for fic writers
Thanks for the tag, @danpuff-ao3 and @turanga4!
1. How many works do you have on AO3? 18 + some I made private.
2. What's your total A03 words count? 45k.
3. What fandoms do you write for? Harry Potter.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Assumptions (483) The asexual Drarry fic.
Quiet Things (134) The other Drarry fic.
Something Old, Something New (52) The Droyle fic (which got rec'd by a Drarry blog).
Longest Night (51) The Drarcissa fic.
Love (51) The Blaise fic.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, because I like to show appreciation for commenters in that way, and because I usually don't comment if I know the author doesn't reply (how Slytherin of me lol) so I don't wanna be a hypocrite.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? The Draco/Scabior fic, Refuge.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Most have decently happy endings, I think? I'll say Silver Lined because thinking of the peacock always makes me smile.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Nope, never did.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? I've done it four times: One Night - Just wanted to see if I could. I could. Longest Night - One-way incest more out of care than attraction, what a comfy notion. [Redacted] - A hetero-allonormative abomination that will haunt me every day until I re-edit it to not be sexual. [Upcoming for a fest] - It's more vibes than smut and it was more for the concept than the titillation.
All of them are very gentle in form even if they're fucked up in concept. And strange that 3/4 were het since I never read that — but well, one I hated, one was family love, and one was conceptual.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Not yet, but I swear one day I will write Draco/Nathan from Life is Strange.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? I hope not 👀
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope. It would be funny to have one translated by someone else into my first language.
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Nope.
14. What's your all-time favourite ship? I don't have one. I read more Drarry because there's so much more of it, but I made a list the other day and there are 20+ Draco ships I find interesting.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? I have a million unpublished WIPs where I've just jotted down a half-formed idea on a doc.
16. What are your writing strengths? I keep Draco a prickly little meow meow, which is the most important thing in a fic :)
17. What are your writing weaknesses? I feel like I make everything funny, I can't ever make it serious enough. But that might be partly because I find everything I write funny in some way. "It's not the writing, it's the fact that it's yours" etc etc.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? No? The closest was deciding how to write Scabior's accent, but it was Draco's POV so I figured if it came across as classist and exoticising that was a feature.
19. First fandom you wrote for? Phineas & Ferb. I shipped Phinbella.
20. Favourite fic you've ever written? Eh, my fave is always the one I haven't written yet.
tagging @leogichidaa @nv-md @lumosatnight @artemisia-black @the-paper-monkey
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fluffybutt-7 · 1 year
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Hey fluff do you have advice on dating when having a um preferance like this? Im really bad at getting to know new people and im horrid at small talk unless it is something I am interested in. I tried grommr but had the experience of people wanting hook ups and or i would just get cold feet. Im almost 30 now and I realize how short life is and how much i want to at least try out being a feeder/mutal gainer with somebody, but its hard to get somewhere due to being in a bad location and not feeling really connected/ having friends in the gainer/encourgement space. It being kind of "taboo" to most people also kind of stresses me out. How did you get over your fear of being a gainer etc?
Hey there!
Sooo I’ve been trying to think of how to answer this. I think I’ll do it in two parts, one about dating and one in general.
When it comes to dating, I feel that it’s best to just be upfront about it IF it is something you feel safe doing. Wild things can happen, you never really know who you’re talking to when just meeting someone. So there’s a lot of nuance to the “just be upfront about it.” I often wait until I feel there could be a genuine chance with the person to bring it up (assuming they’re not part of the community), and even then I try to be careful with it. People can have all kinds of assumptions about this kink, so I always try to approach it while making the other person feel like they can ask questions about it and genuinely have a conversation about it. Sometimes I’ll kinda tease the idea before that point, it just depends on the vibe I’m getting from the person. But a well placed and ethical feedist comment can sometimes give insight into how the person would feel or possibly already feels about the kink. And honestly? More people are into it or at least open to it than I would expect. Be safe, and be clear in your communication when you feel that it is time to tell them. That’s how I approach it at least, I am certainly not the end-all-be-all and if anyone has something they would like to add, leave a comment so we can all learn how to navigate dating with this fetish/kink better. 🥰
Now - how did I get over my fear of being a gainer? That’s a pretty solid question. The answer I have may not be wholly relatable, but it’s the one that I think will convey my feelings best. I think it’s similar to when I came out as gay. I grew up in a verrry small, verrry conservative Midwest town, and I was the only out gay kid in my high school when I came out. It was fucking terrifying, but for once……. I was me. And holy FUCK I was happy. I felt untouchable, because at last there were no more secrets, no reason to hide. It didn’t matter if someone said shit, because I knew who the fuck I was and I knew I fought for my own happiness. I also knew that the people who really loved and cared for me would have my back, and they did. Well, most of them. But I guess those were the ones who didn’t really care, weren’t they? At the end of the day, we deserve to fight for our own happiness, whatever it is (as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else or yourself, etc. I don’t wanna miss the nuance to that statement), and the people in our life who are really our people, the ones who will love us and accept us and celebrate us, will support us (see above parentheses) and have our back.
I also very much understand the struggle of being in a bad location and not feeling connected - I think maybe that’s one of the reasons I made this blog, so that those of us who feel isolated in this community can start to feel like… a community. You can certainly count me as a friend. ☺️ I hope somehow this helped, and I apologize for rambling a bit lmao. Feel free to message anytime! I may not respond right away but I always try to respond to my messages here. Hope you have a good night. :)
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stormblessed95 · 2 years
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Good afternoon Storm,
I love saying that! As I am a Marvel SUPER-STAN it feels like I am speaking to Ororo (Storm from XMen) and I love that!
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So here is my first official ask for you (following all this months of “respectful stalking”).
What and/or how long do you feel/think it would take for South Korea to look into same sex relationships?
I come from a “Japanese Backgroud” in the sense that I am very familiar with the ways of the Japanese culture. Never lived there, mind you, but my life from 2010 was very much conditioned by it . Any holidays I could take I would go for weeks to Japan and then go back home in Europe. As a self-though, I successfully got my JLPT level 3 so technically I could live and work there as well.
When Japan announced that they were now lawfully taking into consideration same sex marriage, I was so f***inf shook. I love that country, but as a woman and a person who is part of the lgbtqia+ community I didn’t think I’d see any such change happening in my lifetime.
Now the women movement already had started but the same sex marriage came out of nowhere and literally my colleagues had to tell me that! I was so shook. I really didn’t see that coming. Now it is not a made law yet, but it is under revision in congress and some prefectures can already make it legal! Now, the fact that it is under revision has made many in the community much more comfortable over there and I almost cried on that day.
I’m really not familiar with the Korean culture. Not at all. And I was wondering if you happen to know at what point they are with their lgbtqia+ matters, because at the moment with my limited knowledge they seem to be so far away... Regardless of the Christian community which is very strong and very vocal, I was wondering about your thoughts on the matter. I was wondering if you think they might take a “Japanese stand” on the matter or just keep ignoring the matter and proceed as they are?
South Korea also has a very big lgbtqia+ community and it hurts me to think that they might have to struggle to no end.
Thank you so much in advance💜
Marengo.
Hi! So wow, this is a hard and dense topic where I'm not sure if I can do it total justice here in a blog post. I do have a post up from last year about homophobia in South Korea. Which is here for those who haven't seen it or want to reread as a refresher before this post
And I guess we can kind of take this as a part 2 for that post now.
I can't guess on how long something will take, I don't know that much about how policitical maneuvering works. I just know it will absolutely take too long no matter what. But we can sort of just touch on what things currently are looking like over there right now based on my admittedly limited knowledge.
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They do currently have a new president over there, Yoon Suk-Yeol. In regards to the people he was up against for the presidency his stated stances for the 4 pledge recommendations in the LGBTQ category was a partial pledge in all four. South Korea is still one of the lowest ranking developed countries for gender equality and same sex relationships are still considered bad and taboo.
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Though we can say that there has at least been SOME progress. In April 2022, South Korea's top court overturned a 2019 military court conviction of two soldiers sentenced to now suspended prison terms for a same-sex relationship they had. The Court said the original conviction did not take into account whether the defendants' relations, which took place in a personal space, were consensual, and thus excessively restricting their right to sexual self-determination. The two defendants were indicted in 2017 for having same-sex intercourse in 2016, while off duty and outside their base, which is punishable with prison for up to two years under the Military Criminal Act. In the past, authorities said this law was required in order to maintain discipline.
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But some progress is not a lot. Nor has this (to my knowledge) actually decriminalized gay relationships in the military (yet). In 2019, the now presidential secretary, Kim Seong-hoe, made statements saying he believed that homosexuality was a type of mental illness and should be treated as such. He HAS acknowledged that past statement as hate speech and has "back tracked." In the way that politicians do. His statement is now not any better. His current statement regarding LGBTQ citizens? Here:
“I respect individuals’ diverse sexual orientations. However, personally, I am against homosexuality. And there are people who have innate homosexual tendencies, but in many cases, I think people mistake their habits or tendencies as their sexual instincts. In those cases, homosexuality can be treated, like how a smoker can receive treatments for cigarette addiction.”
Jackass.
And the president himself? When asked in a humans rights watch questionnaire about steps he would take to recognize same sex relationships, Yoon stated:
“Although one may have the right to choose their sexual orientation, I think we need a careful approach to the issue because denying biologically assigned genders and recognizing same-sex couples could have significant social impact.”
No, he doesn't mean a positive social impact either. At least in his "opinion." Yoon also made getting rid of the Ministry of Gender Equality and Family a central pledge of his during his campaign. Saying that there is no systemic discrimination of gender in South Korea. Which is fundamentally untrue and should show his stances fairly accurately. Not to mention that queer people are still considered bad, there is almost "witch hunts" for them in the military, which have been shared and talked about. And even Holland a few months ago posted about being attacked and hate crimed while walking the city with his manager just for being an openly gay idol
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So do I think anything is going to change in the next few years? No. I really don't. Do I think that there are people fighting for their rights and pushing and that baby steps are being taken? Yes. I hope they will get there. I hope everywhere will get there. No one deserves to live in fear for simply being who they are or being out with someone they love. And this should serve as an excellent reminder to people who think BTS might be gay or who might be dating in a queer relationship and for jikookers who believe Jimin and JK are together but question why at times they may act differently than normal. Or just want them to confirm something. Or just want them to shut people down more effectively. Or whatever TF it is you want. Remember the society they live in and remember the things you are asking them for can actually harm them. Either mentally or physically or otherwise.
If you are queer, living in a homophobic society, that will affect you CONSTANTLY. And it will affect your actions at times too. Hell, even if you don't live in a homophobic society, it will still affect you at times.
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As of now, with this current administration, I don't see things progressing any further than they are now. I'd love to be proven wrong. And I think that at least not letting anything get worse can be considered a small win. The current president campaigning to even partially promote some LGBTQ stances, but doing absolutely nothing about it yet also comparing it to a smoking habit that needs to be kicked. It's giving the same vibes....
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Depressing. But again, Baby steps are baby steps and we can be happy for those while simultaneously wishing for more. And that's just South Korea. So many countries, even the ones that are doing better, have far to go.
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