#I cant draw birds so please like ignore the first one

[mothbagel]

emesis blue art (not really any spoilers but blood warning)

....can you tell who my favorite character is /silly

[ramblesofajester]

whispers of a witch (chap1/?

this is just a self indulgent fic for me to write when I feel like shit and yes it will have nsfw

info: they/them, curvy body, glasses, anxiety.

The cool wind sweep past your cheek as you squat down, fingers numbing and turning blue from the constant foraging across the forest floor to fine the herbs you require, its late winter and you have just run out of several herbs you use quite frequently for personal use and when healing the villagers. of course as always there is a catch when you need to get something done. one, you where delivering a baby a good portion of the day, then doing your normal round with the villagers, so soon night is to fall, two the Lycians have been testing there luck with the village borders as of resent, three the only place those herbs are left growing are near Heisenberg's land due to you harvesting all the more accessible ones previously. and just to top it all of duke wouldn't be able to gather a shipment until the next new moon, that being two weeks away so here you are right before dusk cut plants with frozen fingers outside of a missive chain-link fence in the middle of the woods. Gazing around, you are in a small clearing, the village is about a mile, mile and a half to the south west of here. the factory's smoke stacks just visible over the tree line. Sighing you focus on the task at hand, slowly griping the base of the plant you say thanks to the earth and pull it up root and all, listening to the birds as there song slowly drifted thru the trees. standing up you, make your way over to the next bushel of plants emerging from the thin coat of snow. suddenly all the brides stop singing setting off of several alarms in your brain knowing its wasn't you who disturbed them wiping around, franticly looking you hear and see movement all around you just out of sight in the brush you cant tell what it is. assuming it to be Lycians or and angry bear or even a stray ghoul from the castle grounds. garbing the dagger from your boot you crouch down to an defensive position slowly making your way toward the path you came from. as you take a step back slowly a few Lycian emerge from the tree line teeth bared eyes holding a burning hunger. a soft gasp leaves your lips if there are this many you know more are soon to follow

"well shit, I couldn't just go and have an easy day now could I?" you ask the Lycians sarcastically not really expecting a reply. a deep chuckle caught you off guard and in your shock you hear the swift shifting of metal. the feeling of cold steel on your ankle stealing your attention from the fast change of gravity as you are hoisted into the air, dangling like a prized fish. attempting to regain your bearings. you look around seeing the Lycian pack now completely surrounding you.

"well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in," standing clear in the path arm outstretched to hold the chain around you feet taking a step further with every word.

"a lost little bunny, who is hoping around where they should not be..." he says in a little tune with mirth in his step. finally stopping right in front of you raising you so your face is level with his shoulders you reach out attempting to swipe at him with you dagger, as soon as you weapon is revealed is ripped from your grasp and now spinning around you and the lord. a large gloved hand grips your face forcing you to look at lord Heisenberg.

"now I cant tell if that was stupidity, or bravery little bunny but I'm guessing you dont know who I am." he speaks with amusement as he examines your face and, forces you to look at him. you stop squirming long enough to stare at the round shades perched on his nose. this being the first time you have seen the lord this close ,its usually only in passing or from the shadows as to not be noticed, but now you have to admit the stubble and scars, the cocky smile, the smell of oil, pine, smoke, and Tabaco is actually not that bad.

"No I know who you are, just really dont care cause I'm a little busy" you immediately wiggle from his grasp and start reaching for the chain around your ankles. a boisterous laughter is released from behind you and suddenly your falling about a meter, back connecting with the ground a large "oof" emanating from you. Rushing to get the chain from around you ankles it fly from your hands. jumping to your feet you face Heisenberg head held high

"oh... you do know me, so it must be stupidity, that must explain why your on my land as well" Heisenberg ponders aloud." so you must either be lost or have a death wish" he says with a chuckle

"nope not lost, just need some of the herbs here and if you live in this village and haven't runaway or offed yourself you have a death wish" you reply flatly brushing the dirt of of yourself as you stand to gather your things. "now" you say turning back to him "my dragger if you'd please" extending you hand cautiously with and expectants look.

"wow, you've got some balls on you" puffing on his cigar "you better watch that attituded bunny" you are suddenly painfully aware of the small pack of hunger Lycian circling you both "and remember who the man in control is" hand still outstretched you snap back with

"listen hear 'lord Heisenbitch' I am sorry for trespassing on you land but I need 7 different herbs and at least 5oz of each, I need them before tomorrow evening, some of them for mother Miranda, as well as a women who just gave birth in the village. Now unless you wish to explain to Miranda why her healer is missing, and her people dead due to illnesses I would like my dagger back and you and your fine fuzzy companions to kindly fuck of." you knew your words where dangerous but at this point in the evening you really didn't give a fling fuck and the shock on Heisenberg's face when he recognizes you almost made it worth it.

"Wait your Miranda's prized witch, oh man this is great, how have you lasted so long, your so small bunny" this just pissed you off more you want your dagger back but he's just so infuriating. your dont have time for this

"Fine, just keep the dagger" you say shoving past him. Growling at the Lycians blocking the path they stay there ground and growl back, only to glance behind you whimper, and slowly back away clearing the path. A chain roughly wraps around you waist spinning you around and pulling you flush against Heisenberg before returning to his trench coat pocket. blowing his smoke in your face he drawls

"wow wow wow, slow you roll peter cotton tail I ain't being stingy, I just wanna talk a little" as he says this he wraps his arm around you waist slipping your dagger back into its sheath leaving his hand to rest on the dip of your hip, the other griping your chin forcing you to look up at him

"Let. Me. Go!" you hiss out never braking your gaze of his glasses

"now what would Miranda think of this, her pet of the leash, not respecting or listening to your lord" he teases not lessening his grip at all

"I dont give a scraggly rats ass, just let me go you bastard!" you spit at him, resaving a chuckle as a reply .

"ohhh I like you bunny, you've got fight not a lot of that left hear any more. but I need something from you darling, so we are gonna take a little walk back to your place, your gonna help me, then ill help you with your little situation how does that sound there bunny?" spinning you around arm still securely on your waist, he starts to walk still puffing on his cigar, quickly you realize you have no choice in the matter. the Lycians slow start to follow you keeping there distance at about 3 meters back this continues for a wile and it might have even been pleasant having company for once on the walk, you if you ignore the hungry Lycians and the fear Heisenberg will get angry or be done with his little game. slowly the forest edge and the village come in to the distances well as a small well worn foot path leading into a thick pine forest near the base of the Benevento valley

"so bunny, which way is it" Heisenberg ask moving his arm up to rest on your shoulders using the other to jester at the path ways.

"This way" you mumble out, gesturing to the pine foot path. now moving forward on you own accord tiered of being user around like a lost child. you dont make it very far seeing as soon as you start to move away he tightens his grip

"ohh come on bunny, no need to get cold feet. your getting something good out of this too, you just chill a little there thumper" he says smirk never leaving his face.

"well it sure as hell dont feel like it, this feels more like a kidnaping only we are headed to my own dwelling" you watch as the pine trees grow thicker with every passing second drawing closer to your burrow. soon a large moon gate covered in rosemary and lavender comes into a view just beyond it several greenhouses small and large soft light emanating from a few

"Now hold up thumper if you have all of these, what were you doing traipsing around by my factory? you weren't trying to get my attention were you?" he jabs at you obviously trying to get a rise out of you.

"What I was looking for I do not grow because it is local and I had a store of some, but it a since been exhausted, lots of sick ones this season." you replied tiredly seeing as dusk has passed a wile ago and you had been called out well before day brake. now you where just too tired to deal with his shenanigans. continuing forward you approach the door and tap the center of the door with the old iron key handing from your neck three times then you insert it into the keyhole and twist it three times to the right and it slowly creeks open. rushing forwards in an attempt to put some distance between the two of you you start to tend to the fire stroking the coals and adding a few logs. while your bussing your self Heisenberg makes himself at home pulling out a chair and throwing his feet on top of the table and popping a new cigar between his lips . Turning to grab your tea pot you see this unfold waltzing over to him and slapping his feet of the table

"That is mahogany" as you say this he goes to protest " no 'lord' Heisenberg you in my domain now no feet on the table" you snatch the cigar from between his lip and toss it into the fireplace "and no smoking in the main room."

"alright, alright," he says holding his arms in the air "one you could have just put it out and handed it back thumper, and second of all watch who your talking to darlin" to this you quickly respond with

"Still dont care" he gives you grunt as a response

"third of all I still have yet to disclose the nature of my visit I need you to look at something for me" and with that he stands up his chest now centimeters from your nose he reaches for his hat and sunglasses setting them on the table, tossing his trench coat on to the chair. your face quickly turning a shade of red dark enough to rival the radishes out in garden as you realize just what he is doing. pulling of his shirt with a wince. Holding his shirt in his hands, you try not to make your gaze obvious, he slowly turns to reveal a large, deep laceration very poorly bandages and clearly in the throes of a terrible infection. you immediately push all other thoughts aside concern taking its place, you recognized this wound, you where present when he resaved it .

flashback

"you stupid man child, you know nothing you should just leave the talking to the adults like a good little boy"

"shut your dame hole you bitch"

they have been going at it for 37 minutes and counting Alcina said something Karl disagrees and so the back and forth begins about 5 minutes ago Karl brought out his hammer and been waving it out in the open. tensions have been rising and your a little worried it is about to get violent. Anggie who had been watching the argument from you lap starts to vibrate with joy sensing the approaching violence.

"ooooooooohhh its aaboutttttt tooo get goooooodddddd!!!" she sings while hoping off your lap to sit closer on donnas lap seeing as you are perched by the back wall behind Miranda. and just as you both had predicted disaster struck.

"you insolent fool." Alcina suddenly cry's, swiping her hand forward as Karl turns his back to her slashing from shoulder to hip. you immediately rush forward, only to be stopped by mother Miranda holding her arm in your path.

"ENOUGH, stop the foolishness NOW!" Miranda's voice ringing out clear through the entire hall "Heisenberg my son, stand," she demands. he slowly makes his way to his feet now facing mother Miranda "your actions have been stupid and reckless as punishment, I shall leave you with this burden to care for. maybe it will teach you how much effort it takes heal rather than destroy. and what if feels like to live with ones mistakes." you hand covers your mouth as you bite your tongue. you may not like Karl that much but he still is not as bad as they say.

end scene

"BY THE GODS, how has this not healed yet!? have you been rubbing dirt in it? I knew this was a stupid lesson. I knew I should have gone against that two faced, false goddess, pretensive ass, bitch and marched my happy ass to that factor. THAT WAS TWO WEEKS AGO, this should have been gone ages ago!!!" you shout while carefully examining the laceration. quickly you pull out the char he was previously siting on out, so he could sit on it with his back to the fire and lean on the back of the chair. grabbing Heisenberg's shoulders you gently shove him into the chair. rushing around you grab several herbs hanging from the ceiling in bundles. then over to the counter you produce a mortar and pestle along with several oils and extracts

"woooow, thumper slow down, slow down," he chides calmly garbing your shoulders, your arms still packed full of items. slowly he starts to set the items on the table. "now I didn't rub dirt in it, but there might be some oil, its not healed because I have no idea how to treat a wound this large. and what's this about Miranda being a bitch and ignoring orders?" as he says this you realized just how bad you have fucked up.

"OH MY GODS, I didn't mean a word of it lord Heisenberg I meant no disrespect please I am so sorry dont tell mother Miran-" you franticly bow keeping your eyes to the floor hoping he would ether spare you make you death quick. while he clearly doesn't like Miranda or her family he was still a part of it.

"hay hay hay thumper calm down your alright. I'm not gonna go all psycho on you, and your secret is safe with me, your not the only one with unsavory views on that bitch Miranda." your slowly look up at him in shock it is widely know that he disagree with the other lords but this is a first. you gingerly make your way over to the table and start to mix together several herbs and flowers. "and thumper just call me Karl" he says with a flirtatious grin, you blush but grinding the herbs into a powder

"only if you stop calling me thumper." slowly adding some drops of oils to the mixture making a thick green salve.

"well I gotta have something to call you bunny" he say grin stretching across his face as you blush even more now

"well my name is (Y/N) ok, now stop" you say while puffing up you cheek in a pout. rushing behind him so he can no longer see your face and you can apply the salve" this is going to sting" not give him tome to proses any thing you said you rip off the bandages and start to carefully apply the salve. a shout bubbles up in his throat the second the salve touches his shoulder

"SON OF A Bitch..." he snarls" maybe a little more warning next time y/n" as soon as he growls out your name you short circuit you hand no simply resting next to his wound "y/n... y/n" he waits a couple of seconds before trying again. "y/n!" jumping a little you come back to reality " you all good back there" Karl questions

"almost done just need to finish this up, then I will apply bandages, and all you need to do is rest for a day or two" as you Finnish saying this you reach for he bandages and gently begin to properly wrap the wound "this is how you properly wrap a wound Karl" you make sure to say first his name. "go all the way around and over and around the shoulder" slowly and carefully placing the bandages showing him the movements and positions. you move around to the front of lightly wrapping his shoulder "dont go to tight when bandaging joints, it increases mobility but not lose enough to move" as you speak solely focused on you task at hand you dont see Karl staring at your face, a look of adoration on his face which he is quick to drop once you turn to him. gently patting his shoulder "now all you need is a lot of rest and a hot meal" smiling you slowly make your way over to the fire removing the teapot and hanging a medium sized cauldron over the fire. turning kettle in hand you see Karl putting on his hat and going to pull his coat on having already put his shirt on

"well thumper its been wonderful but I have to get back to my-" you cut him off taking his coat and hanging it by the door.

"oh no you don't, you need rest and real food, and not to make any assumptions but I doubt you'll get any of those in your factory" as you say this you put the chair back in its normal position swiftly going to a small spare room on the side. grabbing a thick blanket you walk to the table, and drape it over the back of the chair. patting it flat you open your arms and jester to the chair "now please have a seat food will be done shortly" you say with a smile as he just stand there slack jawed at you attempting to boss him around. slowly he take a seat and just watches as you prepare a cup of tea for you both "hear this should help with the pain" you say handing him a large mug that still looked too small in his hand. you turn and head back to the counter and start dicing us vegetables and some fish to put the cauldron.

"thank you" he mumbles quietly watching you dance about the kitchen a soft smile on his face. "so what's your story? you obviously dont like Miranda so why stay and be her little pet healer on her beck and call." Karl jests wanting to know more about you now that he has the chance with out his stupid family there

"well a long time ago I has someone I had to look out for, they needed help I could not provide it, Miranda could. So I made a deal, help her, and ill do as wish. So I comply to keep her safe and happy, if it went for her, I would have sent that false deity to her flaming grave decades ago." you finished cutting the veggies and meat depositing it in the pot, you make your way opposite of Karl at the table and take a seat. slowly sipping your tea. "now I just tend to the villagers for Miranda and visit my belladonna"

"wait who is belladonna" he askes a look of confusion overtaking his features

"my apologies, I mean donna, before Miranda adopted her and gave her her gift she was a sad and lonely child with parents too ill to save, so after her parents passing, I watched over her and loved her as my own" you say a soft smile on your face looking around the room I was the only one she let touch Anggie, she was such a kind child asking so many questions behind closed doors and always eager to learn new skills" you reminisce the old days setting your now empty cup on the table. "but now she's grown and well, and happy, so that is all that matters" you say curtly standing and heading over the the bubbling pot of stew and giving it a stir.

"so wait your telling me you the witch who raised Benevento," Karl spouts astonishment clear in his voice. "One how are you not dead yet? Two that's why you spend so much time in that spooky ass house, and three how come you aren't an old hag you dont look a day over 25?" even in shock this man some how still manages to throw in a flirt. you give a small chuckle.

"well when I struck my deal with Miranda," you make you way over to a tall cabinet and withdraw two wooden bowls and a large ladle ." donna was just become a young adult, so she new what excepting Miranda's gift would entitle, including the prolonged life." returning to the stew and scooping a hefty serving into Karl's bowl and only filling your half way. "after her parents suicided she couldn't handle the loss another parental figure, her words not mine, she refused the treatment unless Miranda changed me as well." hanging the ladle on the wall and carefully turning back to Karl and making your way to him. "I had already had my go at life and helped as many as I could so I agreed not expecting to come out alive," you say calmly sitting down in the seat acres from Karl. "unfortunately my will was to strong so hear I am now, a fail experiment serving out my end of the deal" you give a sarcastic smile and do a little jazz hands as your story comes to a close. Karl is still for moment then burst into a deep laughter, but still alarmed at your willingness to except death.

"I'm sorry bunny I dont mean to be insensitive," he attempts to suppress his chuckles. "you are really the one that raised donna?"

"yes I am I know its a little hard to believe, but yes." you say solemnly feeling a little weird everyone who knew you too be donnas nanny have long since passed.

"no no no, there ain't nothing wrong with that darlin! In fact you did fucking awesome, out of all of us monsters she has the best manners and turned out the best." he says in a panicked tone, afraid he has said something wrong.

"Karl none of you are monsters, and your ok you didn't say anything wrong" you say quickly adding " none of you are monsters! you and the other were forced into the experiments, unlike donna and I. your only a monster when you subject an enter village to a false religion just to slaughter them for her experiments under the name of a sick false family she has not love for!" you say venom and hate for that hag dripping from each word. a stern but caring look on your face as you look rights in his eyes as you say this "you aren't a monster. you where a kid with out a choice, and now you are a man surviving and your doing amazing in your situation." you cautiously grab his hand resting in the table " you are not a monster no mater who has told you that including your self" He pulls back lightly but does not remove your hand from his., allowing you to rub his knuckles.

"but I-" he starts but you dont let him continue

"nope you cant convince me other wise, I'm the village crazy witch I am all knowing and wise." you say in a cherry tone, garbing his hand with both of yours. using one to tap out a small tune on the back of his hand. that nice deep laughter made an appearance again you have to admit its nice to hear him laugh instead of ague with everyone.

"well dame bunny, can't argue with that logic now can I " A large toothy grin takes over his face little crinkles show at the corners of his eyes. shaking his head he gives a chuckle then picks up the bowl of stew and finishing what was left in the bowl in a few gulps. setting the bowl down he asks "shit that hit the spot, can I just take you home with me and have you cook for me every night that some dame good stew" he jokes. laughing a little you finish your bowl, garbing his you stand and bring them to a bucket at the end of the sink.

"no I cant come home with you every day" rinsing the plates before setting them in the bucket you continue. "but you can come over when ever the lantern on the porch is light, if its not I am either in the village with a patient, or visiting donna or Miranda, or foraging. I am a busy witch Karl, just a warning." he chuckles

"ill make a note of that expect me often that shits good." he says pointing at the pot hanging over the small flames.

"well in that case ill put some in jars so you can take it with you when you leave tomorrow" you say off handedly while making your way over to the pot fishing the leftovers out, and putting it in two large mason jars. out of the corner of your eye you see him deflate a little when you when you mention his departure tomorrow. moving over to a wall of cupboard you store the two jars "to night you can take my bed or the cot in the guest room, though I dont know if you'll fit" you say walking over to said door and opening it reveling a small room with a vanity in the back left corner to the left of the door was a small sink and counter with a basin next to it. opposite to that was a small cabinet and in the back right corner a small wooden cot about half the side of the man now standing directly behind you in the doorway. so close, when he took a deep breath you could feel his shirt brush your, and his warm breath fans across your neck. now with bright red face you make you hastily make you way to the cabinet to the right of the door and start to grab a large quilt and a pillow or two. Karl enters the room looking around taking in the new environment and casually making his way over to the cot and taking a seat. you head over to him staring at the blanket hoping that he would not see your face

"thank you, y/n you really could've just sent my packing I really appreciate it I do" he says with a soft smile resting on his scared face, 'it suites him,' you think to your self 'he should smile more.'

"well hear you go this should be think enough it gets pretty chilly in hear and I haven't fixed the heater yet so if you need more there are some in the cabinet you say gesturing to the cabinet with your head. holding the blanket and pillow out for him to take he reaches hands grazing against yours as he takes them from your hands pulling them closer"

"thanks bunny I re-" he is abruptly cut short by a sharp wine of wood under duress followed quickly by a loud snap of the cot braking a the loud thud of Karl's ass hitting the floor. "OH FUCK" Karl was now the one looking up at you. slapping a hand over your mouth to suppress the laughter about to burst from you.

"OH by the gods, are you ok" you say still trying to hold back the onslaught of giggles offering a hand for him to take

"so this is what the weather is like down here" he says jokingly as you hoist him off the ground carful of his shoulder and back. gently slapping his chest

"I'm only a little shorter than you, ya know" you say "but in light of me needing to purchase a new cot from duke, I guess you'll be sleeping in my bed tonight." he gives you a flirty look

"dame thumper if you wanted me in your bed that bad all you had to do was ask not buries my ass first" he says with a deep chuckle.

"I am not tying to get you in my bed" you say panicked face exploding with red. "I wont even be in it with you, and secondly it wasn't that far of a drop so the only thing damage was you ego and my cot obviously. now come follow me please." you say now attempting to lead him out of the room. Karl looks at you as if he was trying to figure something but soon trailing behind you like a lost puppy. you lead him through the main room down a hallway with three doors heading to the furthest down you push open the heavy wooden door. letting Karl enter first you make your way to the bed garbing your favorite pillow and a thick blanket off the bed spread "well she's all yours" you say jokingly waving your arm over the bed as a invitation dont lay on your back or shoulder" you say making your way back to the door arms now full "sleep well." and with at you turn to leave only to be stopped by a hand on your shoulder.

"wait if I'm sleeping here and I just demolished your spare bed where will you be sleeping" he ask concern lacing his voice a he turn you around to face him

"well ill go clean up the old cot and then ill just use some spare blankets as a mattress for the night." you say with out a second thought.

"no no no, I will not let you do that you have done enough for me. I'll just go back to my factory and be out of your hair." your face scrunches up.

"you say that as if I am annoyed by you, but I can assure you, you do not annoy me. next I wont let you leave this hut you need to rest and I need to change those bandages as soon as you wake." you say no room for argument evident in your voice. "and if you have such an issue using my bed but I apologies its the only one, and I wont let you sleep on the floor with that wound." you with finality.

"then I guess well just have too share it. cues I will just jump through a window to go back home" he say with a laugh. you have no idea if he was joking or not. still, gazing up at his face the smirk remained "so" he asks "which will it be will you join me or and I gonna have to practice my long distance sprint." you sigh growing tired with every passing second your long day finally catching up too you. no longer having any energy to argue.

"fine" you huff out walking over to the bed where Karl was I like the right side" climbing in you take a body pillow from the back of the bed putting it in the middle " you better stay on your half of the bed old man" you say climbing back down from the bed and heading a dresser under a large window. you produce a pair of sleep thin pants and a large think white long sleeved shirt. "I need to change so ether steep out or just dont look." to tired to care at this point you look over your shoulder and see him turned away from you sitting on the left side of the bed. replacing your dirty clothe with fresh sleep pants and a oversized top. garbing a spare pair of large sleep pants and shirt before making your way back to the bed, flopping onto it comically ,while tossing the change of clothing on his side of the bed "hear you go, this should fit" he looks down at the articles of clothing.

"well thank you bunny," undoing his belt and changing his pant, completely ignoring the new shirt. "but uhhh I dont think that shirt is gonna work though" he says smirk evident in his voice.

"and why would that be-" you ask confusion clear on you face as you roll over to face him without thinking. face exploding in color as you freeze up, now staring at his bare chest brain loosing any train of thought.

"my eyes are up hear now bunny," he says with a deep chuckle "but please dont let me interrupt your staring. as for why I never sleep with one its confining" smirk never leaving his face, as he lays down on his half of the mattress. quickly you roll over

"I wasn't staring, I zoned out. Just toss the shirt on to the top of the dresser" he gives another chuckle but says nothing. pulling the thick comforter up to you chin due to the chill, reaching over you turn the knob on the lantern smothering the flame. "good night Karl sleep well" you say without a second thought closing your eyes slowly, reality fading out as you hear Karl

"goodnight thumper sleep well" a gentleness to his tone that sends the rest of the way to sleep.

word count: 5884

ps: please forgive my horrid grammar

[strawberrypancakesalltheway]

A Reverie Part II

its the continuation of my story called A Reverie. You guys can read it here!!

Slightly angst with happy ending~

A/N: this one is requested by @mai-the-queen (idk why I cant tag you) for the happy ending version. 

Warnings: none

Word count: 1596

Pairing: Nobunaga x MC (Mai)

“I love him. So much. To the point where you won’t understand. You don’t get it. It’s there. It exists. It flows. It moves like rapids through my vein. Comes with bursts and occasionally fades with the day, but it’s always there. And when you find love like that, you don’t want to give it up. But sometimes you have to and sometimes you have to give it to someone else. That’s the hard part”

Dominic Riccitello

 You thought that he will chase you, begging you to not end things.  But he didn’t. Now here you are, at your room, too tired to cry. Well, you get what you want, he leaves you alone, what else more did you want? You should be happy or relief. But you didn’t, you feel awful, cold and empty. You just sat there wondering where things went wrong? Whose fault is this? Is it yours? Sure, your past lover has said things or reasons why they broke up with you. Some said that you are too demanding, too ambitious, you work too much yada yada. But Nobunaga is different, he sees you way past that, he’s never nitpicking on why you love to sew or taking commission for kimonos, he’s never complain when you voice out whatever inside your mind. He loves you for who you are. Before you know it, the sun starts to rise, and you need to prepare for the work today at the castle.

There is not much differences of your activity in the castle. Helping the maid, sewing your commission, delivering letters to some of the warlord. He didn’t call you to the Tensu like usual morning, and no words from him after last night fight. Maybe, just maybe he also needs some space and time to think about both of you, your relationship.

Without you knowing, the evening came. The peaceful atmosphere surrounding the castle replaced by darkness that slowly creeping it. It rattles you, and somehow your guts telling you that something wrong or bad will be happened. You know that the castle is well guarded, and probably the safest place in the entire region, but still it didn’t sit well with you. So, you try to reach your room as soon as possible to calm yourself down.

You tried to calm yourself down by drawing a new design for the next kimono commission for a certain daimyo daughter, and it help you a little bit to settling down the bad feeling. Suddenly, there is a loud screaming and wood knocking echoing throughout the castle. There must be intruder inside, so you blow off the candle and listen to some guards running down the hall. You get out from your room and start to run along with several maid and guards towards the hall.

“Where are the warlords? Where is Lord Nobunaga?”

“Princess, they are currently fighting the intruder on east and west side of the castle. Lord Nobunaga currently fighting near the courtyard. Some of the intruder managed to get inside the castle. Princess, please you need to get out from here!”

You ignore the guard and run past them. This is it. This is probably what caused the bad feeling and dread you’ve felt today. Your stomach drops, the possibility of losing Nobunaga and the fact of those awful words you’ve said to him yesterday. You need to get to him, to make sure that he’s safe.

You ran past the hallway, cursing why it’s so vast. You noticed a group of maid and castle helper hurdled in a corner, some of them are crying.

“what are you guys doing here? Go to the safe room!! Quick!!”

You order some guards to court them to the safe room in the castle. You noticed an abandoned sword near you and you take it. By all means you didn’t have any martial or swords skill, but you’ve watched quite a lot of period dramas during your free time, so there is that.

“Okay, stab first, ask questions later. Here goes nothing!”

You continue to your way to the court area and it seems that the fighting has lessen. You thank whatever God that listening, the fact that you didn’t meet any of the intruder and you didn’t have to stab someone using your sword.

And there he is, standing in the middle of the court, surrounded by several dead bodies you assumed as the intruders. His sword drawn, blood trickling to the soil down below. He looked okay, you heard him giving orders to the castle guards to clear the castle from the intruders.

“Nobunaga!!”

You ran to him; the fight last night didn’t matter to you. What’s matter is that he is safe and alive. He looked surprised; a glint of relief also plastered on his face.

“Fireball, what are you doing here? It’s not safe here!”

“I’m okay. I... I just need to know that you are okay. I have this…. this bad feeling and I just want to make sure that nothing bad happened to you”.

You hug him, relieved that he’s okay. That your Nobunaga still breathing and alive. You realized that you still love him, and the thought of losing him nearly ripped you apart. He returned your hug, and for a second, nothing else matter to you.

You both let go of each other and you look at him. His eyes full of adoration and love for you. Those same eyes that held your entire world, a home to you. You both maybe not perfect and occasionally fighting with each other, but you love him and you can’t imagine a world without him.

“Nobunaga, I…” Suddenly a sharp pain spread at your chest. You didn’t understand what’s happening until you look down to your chest and saw the arrow protruding. And for a while, the world seems to stop.

“Mai!” Nobunaga starts to barks some order to catch the enemy archer. He cradles you to his arms, your blood starts to creeps to the surface of your kimono. Some of the warlords arrived at the courtyard, Masamune and Mitsuhide start to chase the archer who dares to shot you, while Ieyasu told Hideyoshi to prepare a room so that he could treat your wounds.

The pain in your chest start to spread to your whole body, and you’ve never felt something hurts to that extent. You look at Nobunaga’s face, your hands caressing his cheek in attempt to comfort him.

“I still love you, you know……...I’m..I’m sorry for last night” You try to smile, but you no longer able to hold your tears. You love this man so much that you are grateful the archer didn’t shoot at him. You tried to take a deep breath but the pain keeps increasing and your vision starts to blurred. And the last thing that crossed your mind before everything went black is that you’re grateful to meet such an amazing man and lover, and you hope that perhaps some God would take pity on you and let you spend the rest of your life with him.

*******************************************************************************************

The smell of cherry blossom flower rings up the air at the castle, along with some flower petal that dance along with the gentle wind. The sound of the castle bustling to its routine, birds chirping greeting the castle residents. Spring time is always beautiful, the nature reawakens from its sort sleep during the winter, along with people who have been patiently waits for the warm sunlight to shine all over them once more. You’ve always loved the spring, not too hot, not too cold.

You’re sitting bellow a cherry blossom tree near the courtyard, its one of your favorite places to just sit down and enjoying the day. It’s been a month since you’ve been shot by an arrow, without the existence of modern medical technology, the recovery rate is slower. However, with Ieyasu ability and knowledge, you are sure that you would recover and returns to the state you were before in no time. Since you are still recovering, you aren’t allowed to resume your activity as the chatelaine. All of the warlords doting upon you, makes sure that you process of recovery will be the main priority for them. Since you aren’t allowed to do things that you were supposed to do, you decided to take a rest and sit under this cherry blossom tree.

“Here you are, fireball. I’ve been looking for you” Nobunaga approach her and sit beside her.

“I’m kinda bored stuck at my room so I decided to spend my afternoon here. It’s so pretty”

You smiled at him and continue to look at the fallen petal. You start to reminisce the time you’ve spent here in sengoku era.

“It’s been a while, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is. Do you ever have any regret not returning back to the future?”

“Not at all, Nobunaga. This is my home now, with you”

“Good, because I don’t intend to let you go, fireball”

He kissed you, softly. His hand cradling your face, and his lips is so soft. Everything feels right to you. His kisses full of adoration and reassurance, trying to convinced you that he loves you more than anything. He makes you happy, sometimes frustrated. You both maybe fight sometimes but it didn’t mean that the love is gone. It’s definitely there, in the way he looked at you, the way he kissed you, in every single thing he does. And you fell in love with him again, for a thousand time, over and over again.

[dellebecque]

Prompt #1: Voracious

@sea-wolf-coast-to-coast Who: WoL!Aden, the people who mattered most to him, and the one and only thing for which he possesses a truly voracious appetite. When: At various points. How: T, some sad stuff, minor difficult themes and allusions to darker themes.  5.0 spoilers, Shadowbringers spoilers. What: vo·ra·cious/vəˈrāSHəs/   having a very eager approach to an activity."his voracious reading of literature" Where: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20487653/chapters/48616682

Aden’s supposed to be  watching  a broody chocobo, making sure she takes to the eggs in her nest right, and much as he loves the birds he sneaks out one of Mam’s travelogues.  He’s not  supposed  to have them in the barn, too much danger of damaging them, but if he’s going to be out here all day….

The bird coos at him in that soft, motherly way only a broody one will, and shifts on her nest, ruffling her feathers slightly.  It’s a clear invitation, he thinks, and he hesitates for a moment.. then settles down next to her, careful of any eggs that might be hidden in the hay.  When he leans against her she makes a pleased trill, and immediately cranes her neck to start grooming his hair. Aden cracks open the book, trying to ignore the shifting and prodding and soft scratch of her beak.  But when she’s done he can appreciate the soft warmth of her large body, the gentle warks and coos, and lull himself into a sweet place free of anxiety as he begins to read.

If the birds like him so much, Ma and Mam  can’t  send him away like Da did.  They’d be  upset  .

____

Minfilia wends her way through the halls of the Waking Sands, asking after their newest member.  When the inevitable  why don’t you call his linkpearl  comes up she merely says, “That’s a good idea,” graciously, and continues on.   It’s rude  , she doesn’t say, knowing that he  should  be in the building.  And impersonal. After their rocky start.. well, she cannot  afford  to be anything less than genuine and forthright.  And her gifts will not avail her so well over long-distance media.

She finds him on the quiet side of the building, in a small room converted into a secondary barracks of sorts.  Stopping in the doorway, she blinks in surprise at finding all of his gear stowed here now, and he himself perched on a high bunk at the back of the room--hadn’t Tataru assigned him to the other side?--and she wonders if that, too, was a mistake.  He reclines in the bunk against extra pillows pilfered from somewhere, a slender book open across his lap. Even with the bandages covering healing burns from his bout with Ifrit he looks more comfortable than she’s seen him so far.

Yes, she thinks to herself, perhaps they’d  all read him wrong.  In his unguarded quiet her gifts show her not the dedicated soldier she saw before, but a thoughtful, introspective man, one who values solitude and a  gentler  camaraderie than many of their members can offer.  Their conversation can wait, she decides. Let the man have peace, and room to process the horror they accidentally put him through alone.

And let her have time to reassess her approach to this familiar stranger, this man her gifts cry  must  be part of their efforts.

______

Aden’s ears twitch at soft footsteps in the dust and scrub of Mor Dhona, and he knows who it is from the gait.  Moments later G’raha flops down next to him with a dramatic sigh, leaning back against the tree. Aden doesn’t look up from his book, even though he knows the man is waiting for a question.

“I think you might read more than  I do,” G’raha says when he doesn’t get his way, bumping his shoulder against Aden’s.  It’d been annoying at first, physical contact unwelcome, but now he…  understands  .  If he’d been raised by other miqo’te this would be  normal  .  It feels right, the right kind of intimate for friends, unspoken and just outside his comfort zone.  He can’t  explain  that, though, that he wants his boundaries challenged, doesn’t want to be silent and uncertain forever.

“They send you away again?”  Aden flips a page.

G’raha doesn’t move, reading over Aden’s shoulder even as he replies.   “They’re taking readings and refused to let me go after what happened last time.”

“That’s chocoboshit,” Aden says.  He knows G’raha isn’t looking for logic, doesn’t want to hear  you’re the most essential personnel on the survey  from one more person.  Aden would hate it just as much were their positions reversed.

“But if you would  accompany  me….” G’raha doesn’t finish but looks up at him hopefully.

“Cid told me if I didn’t take a break he’d drug my lunch.”  Aden flips another page, ears canting in G’raha’s direction when he doesn’t reply right away.  Finally the man gives an indignant huff on his behalf and leans heavily against him once more, reading over his shoulder.

“Wait,” he says, “is this the new one?”

“Yeah.”

“How did you get it all the way out here?”

“Tataru sent it.”

He doesn’t say anything for a long moment, and Aden wonders what’s going through his mind. He glances up from his book and thinks he sees the faintest edge of regret in his friend’s mismatched eyes.  “How far are you?” G’raha asks.

“Not far.  Want me to start over?”

There’s another moment of hesitation, this quiet side of his friend devoid of bravado that so rarely appears.  And finally, softly, “Yes, please.”

Aden thinks he knows that feeling too well, but he won’t pry to find out if it’s what it looks like to him.  He doesn’t want to talk about it, anyroad, if it is--to admit that sometimes his apparent stoicism is the memory of rejection and the worry that he doesn’t deserve the kindness of others.  But he thinks the reason G’raha talks too much is the same reason he talks too little, and he’s glad to help his friend smooth over the raw moment by flipping to the front of the book and starting over.

______

“You’ve been home, what, three bells?  And already I find you with another.” Aden looks up from his book, smiling softly as Haurchefant leans over his comfortable seat, reclining on a padded bench in one of the windows in the manor.

“They were here before you,” he says cheekily, lifting up his book for emphasis, “and they’ll be here after you.”

“ After  me!”  Haurchefant clutches a hand to his breast, mocking distress.  “Already you plan to be rid of me! I am  wounded to my core.”  He drops a knee to the side of the bench, lowering himself down to caress Aden’s cheek.  “I should have known I could never satisfy your  voracious  appetites.”

Aden laughs, unable to continue the mock seriousness.  “I could say the same thing about  you .”

Haurchefant leans down to kiss him, insistent, and Aden loses himself in it for a moment.  But at length his lover draws away, leaving him to his book. “Don’t be long.”

He knows that when he’s inevitably up past midnight reading, Haurchefant will merely tease him and welcome him to bed by folding him in the warmth of his embrace.  The judgement is all in jest.

  But in hindsight it’s the only time in his life he wishes he’d read less.

___________

He closes the door to the small cabin behind himself, struggling to find his sea legs around the dizziness and disorientation whirling through his head.  Aden presses a hand to the wall, and has to follow it to the bed. He’s glad for the privacy. Glad Tataru argued so ardently for this. Outside he has to pretend at being whole and hale, intimidating to the pirate crew.  Here he can be alone. Weak. Nurse the half-healed wounds of his body and quietly pick at the festering scabs over his heart on their long journey to Kugane.

But today he doesn’t have the strength for it.  He drops heavily onto the bunk, straining uncomfortable over the edge to open the chest lashed to one end of it, and pulls out the first thing his fingers light upon--a battered old book.  Balm to soothe the aches of his mind.

He curls up on the hard bed, remembering all the places he could’ve been instead, and tries to forget for a little while.

__________

An infirmary is not what the Exarch expects to see through his scrying, but there it is, dark stone walls and pale linens on the bed.  He frowns, leaning forward slightly. Had his actions changed the situation so much already? But--no, it is the Scions prone in the beds.  He flinches--his doing.

The subject of his scrying finally crosses the view of the window, carrying a wooden chair in one hand and a book in the other.  Aden pauses, tail swaying slowly, before he places his chair between the twins’ beds, facing out towards the rest of the room. No one else seems to be present at the moment, and he wonders if perhaps the remaining Scions are taking turns at keeping an eye on their comrades.  Would that he could tell them it’s hardly necessary beyond the upkeep of their bodies. Their time could be better spent elsewhere.

Aden sits, opens the book and looks around the room once more--is that a hint of  nervousness  he detects?  ‘Tis a familiar expression, that subtle anxiety the Warrior of Light tries  very hard  not to show--one he knew in his youth, and knows even better after his years of observation.

He understands why when Aden begins to read aloud to the unconscious Scions.  Aden’s voice is uncertain at first, but as time draws on it grows more confident, rich in its fullness.  He finds himself enraptured by it, drawing back his hood and freeing his ears to hear more clearly. Then he closes his eyes, and remembers a quiet afternoon spent under a tree in Mor Dhona.  This story is familiar, an earlier book in the series. He hasn’t read it in a hundred years.

The summoning can wait for one more story.

[secretshinigami]

Masterlist of Demegawa-chan’s Special Prompts

A compiled list of everyone’s prompts from the exchange – thank you for letting us post them, and we hope you guys enjoy them! Prompts are organized by their submitter, so be sure to give credit if you use one.

niatsuki

Near and Light kissing

Mikami and Light in the rain sharing an umbrella

Misa in a suit

Domestic Mikalight

Matsuda confronting Near on the theory he brings up at the end of the manga

Nate and Light having an obtuse argument, but with romantic undertones

toygowther

Light wearing a crop top, high waisted jeans and fishnets, and a choker. 

L having a nice day out in the park eating ice cream with Maki and Near 

Musical!Light smiling

Misa in a cute gothic dress doing a finger heart

L and Light wearing Misa Misa merch at one of her concerts.

AU in which Light is actually a woman. The fic would follow how Misa reacts to it and if she would still want to be her girlfriend.

Role swap au. Light as Misa and Misa as Light.

Light and Misa meeting a different way and actually forming a healthy relationship. 

spaceblue

L, Naomi & B shenanigans

Naomi, Wedy and Lidner as Charlie's angels (or L's angels?)

Wammy kids as Pokemon trainers

Matt gets the rest of the Wammy kids to play Smash with him

Naomi and L after the end of LABB, after he says his name is Rue Ryuzaki 

Drama!L and drama!Raye Penber bickering 

hazblogs

your take on A's gender and sexuality, bonus points if they're not a cis man and straight

Mello and sun imagery

Beyond Birthday and his eyes

Near with Hanahaki disease (pick who it's about if you want a specific ship)

Mello and witchcraft, if possible in the canon universe

Naomi interacting with Beyond (au or canon), if possible talking about L or the Wammy kids

L/Light being soulmates, in canon or in an AU

how Matt started smoking (I am comfortable with heavy drug themes)

polyphenols

L learning to garden, paint, cook, do taxes, care for an animal, or pay for a parking ticket for the first time

All the times L has cursed Right In Front Of The Task Force (poor Soichiro)

L alone, dressed for the cold, in a cathedral during midnight hours, gazing at the altar in silent contemplation

Aiber and Wedy at an evening gala on a mission

L and Alessandro Juliani warmly shaking hands

Young Naomi in a darkened room with red string and case clippings everywhere

What chain of events led to Quillsh Wammy deciding to adopt L and care for him?

Matsuda cant swim and he’s knocked into a body of water on a case, one of the task force has to go after him

The conversation that happened between L and Rem before he walked out onto that rooftop

L traveling somewhere exotic for a case, meets celebrity of your choice and becomes unlikely friends, takes down crime circle together 

Naomi and L interact side by side as partners during a seperate case  

paralllaxes

16 year old Gevanni (normal day or family banter)

Naomi in modern clothing

the SPK in one of those cheesy family pictures.

Naomi thinking about LABB while in Japan

SPK found family stuff / domesticity

Naomi being with the SPK (with or without Raye is the author's choice)

kiranatrix

Light and L in emo/goth clothes or in an emo band

Light in a crown on a throne

Ryuk doing something funny or playing a prank while invisible

L and Light on a road trip

Misa painting Rem’s looooong nails or giving her a makeover

Death Note characters as birds! 

Sayu gets a grumpy parrot and Light doesn’t realize it can talk until after he hears it repeat some Kira plan thing, so he has to adopt it to keep it from spilling on him

L and Light talk about something important that happened to them in their childhood

L has to deal with growing amount of Light’s products in their shared shower and tries some out of curiosity with disasterous results

Light accidentally eats the last piece of cake in Kira HQ and L can’t deal at 4am

Lawlight Apocalypse AU of any variety 

Beyond breaks out of prison after LABB, where does he go?

47gaslamps

The task force with portentous umbrellas

Halle, symbolically framed between Near and Mello

Naomi kicking Light's butt after he attempts to use force

Matsuda gives Yamamoto a welcome-aboard to the former Task Force / 

AU where the drawer IS forced open

Misa has to shield Light from the paparazzi

translightyagami

Light and L in a crowded apartment, obviously lived in, playing piano next to each other

Light sewing something like his father's suit jacket or a shirt Mikami tore

Indulgent ask for my cryptid AU L and Light sitting in a graveyard having a nice time

Light having a smoke before he has to go tell his parents he's moving in with Misa

Light and Sayu having a difficult conversation where they're both saying they're gay without out loud saying it

Near goes to a Lego building event and meets a nice boy who isn't a Wammy kid

almostsane-things

Wammy's kid(s) of your choice sitting on the roof, watching the sky

Beyond Birthday and Candy Guro

DN characters in a rock band, maybe the shinigami are their mascots

Draw a less appreciated character but try something new with your style/medium. (i.e. use different brushes, incorporate a traditional art/craft like painting or cross-stitch, make a collage piece, go abstract, etc)

L in prison

Misa and Sayu becoming friends/ hanging out

The legend of Kira, how has the story of Kira changed over time in universe? Do people believe it was something supernatural, a government conspiracy, a group of vigilantes, or perhaps it's faded to nothing but a cautionary tale for misbehaving kids

A DN character enjoys that thing you really like/ find interesting to learn about, and shares that interest with someone else. (i.e. Matt plays your favorite video game with someone, Linda teaches someone about gardening, etc)

weneedtotalkaboutdeathnote

A hot double date with BBxDemegawa and LxHiguchi

B meeting L (any context is fine).

Naomi and Raye getting coffee together, having a nice time.

L can see ghosts, but he chooses to ignore them. This becomes increasingly had to do when B’s spirit shows up during the Kira investigation.

An Au where L defeated Kira, grew older, and basically disappeared. Older Mello (mid 20sish, now a detective) follows a lead that takes him to the washed up L. 

Non serial killer, "Unprivate Detective" Beyond Birthday works on a case with Naomi Misora.

pensulliwen

Misa making Valentine’s Day chocolate, perhaps while daydreaming about a fantastically unlikely result of giving them to Light.

Rem holding Misa as they fly over the city.

Meme redraws featuring Misa, Light, and L. Just go crazy. Any ridiculous meme image, shove these dorks in there instead.

Misa convincing Rem to take her flying, the feelings they both experience in the air together.

Misa and Mogi on a shopping “date” in which the unlikely pair manage to work together surprisingly well.

Light considers eliminating Misa from the equation many times, but there’s always something that stops him. Explore how he views her and the dissonance between how he views her versus how he views himself, as well as the reasoning for keeping her around longer than intended. 

izaori

Demegawa in a hot tub but instead of water its money

Mello playing soccer with the other kids (like Matt for example). 

Matsuda playing cookie clicker, because he's obsessed.

Young Demegawa when he first got his job, maybe a few months into the job.

Sayu studying for her big exam coming up so she goes to big bro Light for help.

Ryuk discovers sour green apples rather than just the red ones. Maybe Sidoh discovers dark chocolate/white chocolate at the same time.

mikami

High school age Mikami in a high school uniform.

MikaLight out on a date

anything L/Higuchi

A Sakura TV Documentary about the Kiras. 

MikaLight office romance, non-Kira AU.

Write me a fic about Demegawa. Can definitely be comedy, but please take the character somewhat seriously.

ghostoftasslehoff

L and Light playing piano together.

L with a kitty

Sayu and ‘Ryuzaki’ meeting, and hitting it off 

Matsuda recieving a present or something from a ‘secret admirer’

A day in the life of Matsuda (away from the task force)

L and B’s first meeting (can be shippy or not, whichever my Shinigami prefers)

L tries to engage in punnery with the task force, but only one person engages (preference for Light, but surprise me!)

Sayu’s (or Sachiko’s) thoughts on Light’s new secretive actions as Kira becomes more and more active 

tzigi

(All canon-compliant)

L gets first suspicions about a string of heart attacks which may be a new murder case for him

Light’s first day at To-Oh after L’s death

Light’s first day of work at the NPA 

Near tries to pick up L’s investigation

Why did Near go back to L’s original font for the “L” logo between chapter 108 and the C-Kira oneshot? 

A non-Lawlight rendering of the first evening of Light being chained to L after everyone else has already gone to sleep (preferably in keeping with the One Day one-shot) 

Light begging Ryuk for his life

Light’s funeral

catfishmaster

The main characters (plus B) as DND characters

Older Near (like 25-30) with a bunch of cats he keeps for company

Roger bonding with Near after the Kira case.

Beyond Birthday faked his death in 2004 and now lives alone as a poor and pretty miserable theatre actor with a fake name. Oh, and also it's a Kira wins au.

Years after the Kira case has concluded, L takes on Near as an apprentice.

Matt takes Near on a tour of an afterlife-like world they both wound up in. It's more like a dreamscape than anything else but it serves as an afterlife.  

[luxexhomines]

Hello! I was reading through your blog and wanted to ask if you could write for Tsumugi with a female S/O who is the Ultimate Witch? In or out of the V3 universe is fine. Thank you!

Hullo, anon! Thanks for the request!! Although Tsumugi isn’t my favorite character, I so enjoyed writing this. I put it out of the V3 universe, so there are no spoilers for anyone wondering. Wasn’t sure if you wanted the reader be doing “real magic” or magic tricks, so it’s a little vague, haha.Icon credit to 64pxs! Also wow my third request finished in one day although it’s past 1AM & technically a new day here now!

Guess I’d classify this as fluff, too. It’s not that long, so it’s not under the cut. Here you go!

Tsumugi x Female! Ultimate Witch! S/O

You knocked on her door and grasped the doorknob, fully intending to open it and peek in the gap, but your plans were abruptly foiled by her voice.

“Don’t even try,” she cackled. “The door’s locked and I’ve got a chair keeping it closed, you know?”

When you tried to turn it, it was true. It wouldn’t budge an inch.

“Oh, come on, Tsumugi!” You whine right outside the door, making sure she could hear you loud and clear. “I haven’t seen you leave that room for a third day now! I know that you’ve got snacks and a bathroom connected to your room, but that can’t be healthy,” you beg. “Please come out…”

Either she’s ignoring you, or she’s ignoring you. Two perfectly possible options. You could even hear her plaintively humming a random tune, a tune that seemed reminiscent of a folksong–but what did that matter now, when part of her reasons for doing so was to drown out the sound of you?

“Can I at least come in, Tsumugi?” You knock on the door again, but you’re soundly rejected.

“No! You’re not allowed in here for the rest of the week, even if I do come out of the room,” she says firmly.

She was getting strangely obsessive about hiding the contents of her room from you, and you were extremely worried. The only times she ever pulled stunts like this was when she hadn’t finished preparing a cosplay for a con coming up soon, but the problem was that there were no cons coming up soon. As you understood it, she had taken a leave from work to do whatever it was she was doing in that room, and you had no clue what was so important that she’d take a week off of work to do it. She thrived off of that income to make living wage and make cosplays in addition to all her the money from her sponsors.

You could only sigh at the plain white door and walk back to your own room, resigned to your lonely fate for the rest of the week. It was anyone’s guess what she was doing or why she was hiding it from you, including your own, despite being her girlfriend.

You supposed you’d go practice your magic for the upcoming magic show you were holding while Tsumugi did…whatever it was she was doing. There was no time to waste at her doorway, calling her name to a silent answer or pounding on the door in exasperation. 

You took a deep breath and gathered your focus for the first act, a rather simple attention-getter with birds flying from your sleeves like colorful ribbons spewing from them. Somehow, it was always the easiest magic that was easiest to mess up, so you ended up practicing the act for at least an hour, worried about the possibility of success in a live performance.

Falling back on the bed, you pant slightly in exertion. Who said magic was as easy as waving a wand? That’s only what magicians wanted other people to believe, after all. If the magician was dropping dead from exhaustion, no one would enjoy the show–no, it was much better for them to believe that the magician possessed unlimited amounts of mana and could continue performing magic for an entire day but just ended it at around an hour for the audience’s scheduling convenience.

But even magicians weren’t immortal. You decided to take a break and walked to the kitchen, grabbing a drink of water to hydrate yourself before returning to practice, throwing a bitter, yearning look toward Tsumugi’s closed door.

It was going to be a long week, just you and your magic.

On the day of the magic show, you hoped Tsumugi would emerge from her cave, maybe make an appearance. But it was fifteen minutes before the show, and she still hadn’t come.

You let out a sigh of disappointment and return to your dressing room as you pick at your ratty, ripped seams of what used to be a smart looking, black long-sleeved tailcoat and matching pencil skirt. You’d had it since your very first show, and you liked it very much, but it was ready to retire and had been for a while now.

In fact, you were surprised Tsumugi hadn’t commented on it–she usually would make note of any clothes you owned that were no longer serving a functional and aesthetic purpose and bring you out to buy new ones. Speaking of Tsumugi, your dressing room just burst open with a long, blue-haired girl in spectacles and carrying what looks like a newly pressed outfit in black.

“Tsumugi! You’re here,” you gasp. “I thought you weren’t coming.”

She rushes over to you, out of breath and frenetic.

“Oh, good, you’re in your dressing room! Take this,” she thrust the plastic protected outfit at you along with a box of what you assumed to be shoes. “Sorry I’m late, it took me so long to finish this. Go change, your show is starting in ten minutes!”

You look at her in confusion, but do as she asks. You’re used to her frantic nature, even if she was rather laidback most of the time. When you finish dressing, she claps her hands together in delight, and swooning.

“Oh, I knew you’d look great in this! I’ve had this idea for forever, I’m so happy I finally get to see you wear it. I can die happy now,” she declares passionately, almost drooling with excitement, her blue eyes glimmering brightly.

You examine the outfit, which includes a pair of white gloves, black heels, a black top hat, and a similar black tailcoat, black dress shirt and pencil skirt, along with a tie of your favorite color wrapped snugly around your neck that curves over your bust gently.

“Tsumugi, you made this for me?”

She nods proudly.

“I think I did a bang-up job of it, too! It’s absolutely perfect for you,” she beams at you, as lovely and warm as the golden sun, and you can only grin like a fool in response.

“You sure did. You sure did,” you repeat, amazed by her accurate, neat needlework and toiling dedication she had offered you in making the outfit.

“Now, go out there and amaze the crowds,” she encourages you, giving you a light push on the back and going out to join the audience below.

The magic show goes splendidly–you don’t know if you’ve ever done a better job, and all kinds of flowers, roses, daffodils, daisies, skyrocket toward your lone figure standing at the center of the black stage, hoping to be caught by you. You wave at the audience happily and skip on and off the stage to the standing ovation before exiting for good.

Luckily for you, Tsumugi is waiting at your dressing room, so there’s no need for you to push through the masses to find her, and you immediately envelop her in a hug, tackling her, and her breath leaves her with the impact you’ve come at her with. She wraps her arms around your back, and you can feel her pride for you simply seeping out like radioactive waves.

You don’t let go of her for a long, long time, and when you finally let go of her, you smile at her in a daze. You can’t believe your girlfriend is this gorgeous, kind, devoted, thoughtful girl standing in front of her.

“I think I’m in love with you, Tsumugi,” you say, staring straight into her eyes, endless pools of blue.

She smiles back, pushing her spectacles up slightly.

“A good thing, too, because I think I’m in love with you, too. That is, if you couldn’t tell after I spent over a week cooped up in my room to make this ensemble for you,” she replies, gesturing at your outfit.

You pat her on the head.

“Yes, yes, I know, good girl. But I was so lonely,” you pout. “Did you have to leave me alone like that for such a long time? I could have died of loneliness!”

She simply laughs full-heartedly.

“I suppose we’d be in trouble if you were a rabbit, huh? But there’ll be no more loneliness on my watch. That sounds rather presumptuous of me to say, but you can trust me on that,” she smiles charmingly as she puts a hand on her hip.

You laugh back at her, sharing in her joy and playfulness.

“You’d better live longer than I do, in that case,” you tease.

Tsumugi bends toward you and places a small kiss on the tip of your nose.

“Your wish is my command, royal magician of the court,” she chuckles.

You smirk and slip a hand around the small of her back, pulling her in closer so that both of your bodies are pressed against each other, and kiss her on the lips deeply. 

“Then, my first command is that thou shalt stay at my side for the rest of our mortal lifespans.”

You can feel the corners of her lips stretch out and upward at this, and you take that to be her response as you draw her in for many more sweet kisses.

[obannthepunished]

uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains

"They call me eagle-eye fjord where i come from." "maybe raven. i dont know." that theory about Fjord being the Hawker is suspicious rn (Apparently theres a third i missed whoops) sam apparently similar thoughts maybe bc Nott brings it up

Jester finally teaching kiri basic phrases, like "go fuck yourself"

Beau + Fjord taking first watch

Caleb checking out the dodecahedron

(Unrelated odd point: i have a current dislike/distrust for liam, which is bullshit bc... i love liam. and caleb and vax. but apparently smt is wrong.)

Dodecahedron is Very Old, and has been shaped/polished Cay uses the haversack as a pillow

BEAU/FJORD Beau: "I think I messed up. I think I should apologise." I HURT? Oh beauregard. oh marisha. "i wanna try, I guess" F: I think he deserves that. He's been good to us. i regret not writing fic now 8(

"OOH, terrible" "YEP." "five" "five" (collective "ooh")

Nott + Jes second. they roll not great.

Tinkle tinkle "nnhnohfishnott"

Kiri is poofed up asleep aAW

trident goin for FRUMPKIN NOOO (pause whilst they look for range on dismissal)

Kiri wakes up "Go fuck yourself :("

Theyre waiting for fish head they could just reappear Frumpkin tho...

Jester is sacred flaming, Molly has a sword active + stabs, Caleb fire bolt, Nott fires an arrow, Fjord eldritch blast, Yasha stabby

Molly + Nott + Caleb miss Fjord hits, Beau hits, Yasha hits dunno bout jes

frumpkin poofs back but doesn't see anything else.

???? alarm lasts 8 hours, not until triggered yall it should still be up. they need to look up the spells smh

Nott messaging to tell yash to hide the bodies

LAst watch is Yash and Caleb i need to stop shortening names

Caleb asks Yasha for people advice :') He's writing it down... i love him Yashas advice is basically "Fucking Bathe" And cay confirms he keeps himself gross because people ignore him more that way 8( Baby

C: "Do you know what i miss? shaving." Y: "I could shave you right now with my sword. I've done it before, you know, to... not have hair on my arms-" Omg shes doing it omg theyre doing it omg I DONT HAVE TO DRAW FACIAL HAIR IN MY FANART ANY MORE FUCK <3333

cay forgets he has a dagger jesus fucking christ

i love everyone making comments + taliesins just amazed like, borderline heart eye emoji look at this whole scenario

M: (to Caleb) "Well done, she [yasha] likes you!"

Nott is Not Happy About Water N: I'LL STAY WITH KIRI everyone else: Convincing her to come N: I'll stay with kiri, and if there's any trouble... we'll see what happens

Fjord goes first, he sees, with his 60ft darkvision, architeture of room. mistly natural, some bits not.

Fjord botches his stealth roll but matt botches his perception even worse. and my thing crashed im so mad.

Fjord is Not a good swimmer. hes like. 30ft swimming speed. Things being left: Caleb's books (2) Molly's coat

travis willingham going "kiris gotta die" then dragging everyone who gasped through the dirt

beau gets fucking 37 on her stealth check Matt: "That's some vax numbers right there!"

The visual aid is... so extra. lights. smoke. what the fuck matthew. (note: when ur best friend is called matthew this is a phrase you say too much)

Surprise round for erryone but Molly and Yasha (purrsonally, i think they were too busy talking abt how beautiful cay is now ;3c)

everyone rolled shite for initiative tho

Caleb casting haste on molly O:

Fjord is very very adept at everything

everyone on crit role can do maths better than me 8(

the marrow fuck beau and fjord royally

watching call lightning forming + marishas face as she slowly realises :)

jes gets the first hdywtdt + crushes a fish with a lollipop

Caleb is taking blind potshots with the glove of blasting boyy. One even hits!

moll gets 3 attacks i love my beautiful devil child

N: Are you guys alive and do you need anything? you can reply to this message~ C: FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK N: oh,, alright.

Taliesin's relief when ashley actually hits is very good.

Beau goes down! D:

hi unrelated taliesin sticking his tongue out at sam fills me with indescribable joy

NEW: Horny twink gets double penetrated by feisty wet ones.

... which is to say two fish dudes stab molly.

Jes heals Beau, but we all know fine fucking well if she hadn't, Yasha would have done it on her next turn. still might since she's only on 11

Cay using dispel magic O:

Molly gets the second hdywtdt "I'm literally just a windmill at this point"

FJORD gets the third F: "I see Molly loojin' around, give him a little wink-" (murders) M: Fucking arsehole F: (witty comment) PEACE OUT (blinks out again)

"Sevens are scary" - Taliesin

Yash gets the next hdywtdt Xorhasian Neck Tie Jesus christ

I was right tho Yasha was seriously considering healing beau, it just takes her action

Two more fishfucks 8(

More call lightning

Sams flask says "lost my best friend over a bowl" and that hurtie

caleb is boutta die. Yasha is boutta die first lmao oh no. i love taliesin jaffe an inhuman amount. Yash gets pulled OVER beau and marisha makes like grabby hand motions which is VERY cute

ok NOW caleb boutta die. he Shield's, and then fragments "Caleb will remember this"

Beau looks at Yasha, looks at Caleb, and goes to CALEB (sobs) blasts a ki point and everything

Molly gets a nat 20 oh he's such a babe

Nott spending her turn justifying herself to Kiri

Fjord blinks back in and fucks up ANOTHER fishfuck

Yasha casting healing hands on HERSELF good.

"You dont have a printout of your character sheet????" "Oh yeah I do after you asked me nine times" liam wh

both yash and caleb are at ONE hp

B, spening her last ki point: HEYCALEBWESHOULDTALKLATER

Beau gets the HDYWTDT tho

Molly is Very Sick from losing haste

Caleb goes the fuck down Fails his first save

everytime tal says "im gonna try something weird"  i heart eyes emoji shame he cant do jack fuck though

Nott Burning Bolt shoots the fishfuck for 24 damage jeeeeez doesnt die but drops lightning

Fjord: (appears, fails, disappears)

if Caleb permadeaths i WILL cry

PLEASE YASHA PLEASE GOD JESTER PLEASE THEY KILL IT IM CRYING SO HARD no like literally i am actually crying bc matt very deliberately did that so that he didnt kill Caleb

Jester uses her pearl of power to regain a slot, and use it to cast prayer of healing for SHIT rolls.

Jester goes back to Kiri <333 baby. baby bird.

Matt mercer keeps using words ive only ever seen written and im ALWAYS ???? about their pronunciation

Fjord finds some L00t Like boxes and longswords and a pool of water with dozens of metallic objects mostly outlawed diety symols. changebringer moonweaver. others i forgot. stormlord. everlight. asmodeus ooh, bane strife emperor. and tiamat.

"a little black bird that's fluttering to try and get dry" fuck thats so damn cute. Marisha has the :D face

Calebs books are dry

wooden box + pool are magic. like. WITHIN.

Enchantment in the box. Molly collecting the moonweaver pieces

JESTER FINDS TWO SYMBOLS FOR THE TRAVELLER? HOLY SHIT Different make, pure silver one, burnished bronze another door arch with the road

Molly gets 12-13 symbols

Nott mage hands just so good even drunk

in the box is a blade, gold, jewel encrusted Molly shoves Nott aside to get it cause its a scimitar style

Caleb finds the arch-heart symbol? Takes one

Yasha takes 4 symbols for the storm god.

Bane/strife emperor symbol Fjord is curious about chained coffin he throws it into the pool. nothing happens.

JEster goes to pll it out and gets a big catseye yellow gem,  magical, but not a school of arcane magic. it has a line groove in it, very deliberate, an oval.

"something about that [orb] is very familiar"??? (Matt to Travis)

i was right about the orb being familiar

C: (abt the gold sword) This blade is called Summer's Dance C: "Mr. Mollymauk," M: "Mr. Caleb."

Blade allows user to cast Blink basically, and is stronk

official-europa replied to your post: uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains “They...

i think its probably misty step and not blink 

official-europa replied to your post: uhhhhhh notes HURT WEEK im pains “They...

on the sword i mean

caleb tries to ID the orb

fjord touches it "sky is moonlit + cloudless, clothes not your own, nor body, overcoat + human skin. thick calloused skin. left hand stone. look down, see body of previous owner, dead in blood. natural landmass seawater night. flash. right hand grasps falchion. voice booms. potential. jams the stone into gut, cCONSUME. vanishes into belly. looks into water. REWARD." "Vandrin."

i dont kn ow what the fuck is going on.??? everyone else sees this o shit

oh shit is the eye the symbol of Fjord's patron?

"he was my mentor, a captain of mine. a man named Vandrin." Y: What happened to Vandrin? F: I'm not sure. he captained the ship i worked on for many years, and their was an incident. an explosion, terrible weather, waves, "i was knocked overboard" when f woke up he was back on shore

"how did you survive" "I'm not entirely sure."

explosion was sabotage.

the pool is saltwater.

Molly shoves Fjord's head into the water

comes up "You okay???" "Do it again" "Tap three times when you're done!" Fjord drowns

they take as much as possible up and out and decide to dynamite everything in. dramatic exit..

They take the bodies down and lay them in the swamp to rest and decompose.

Beau tries to pull Caleb aside and he just stonewalls her until she actually apologises.

Caleb "I give beauregard a hug and say 'idont know what im doing. just. go with it." BEau very AWKWARDLY hugs him back Beau consulting Fjord, Caleb consulting Yasha The entire other side of the table clapping.

Beau: UH. GOOD TALK. FRIEND. (awkward silence) Beau: Seriously though. Friend? (pause) Caleb: Uh. Ja. (brb dying)

there is a single yellow eye on the hilt of the falchion.

episode END

[deviousbrat]

Convo over Skype with my friend (S) about asshole cat Vader XD

S: So this is horrible but lol https://padawanlost.tumblr.com/post/172603007740/lzzieolsen-darth-vader-in-star-wars-rebels in this gif set...the one where Vader like bitch slaps at Ezra with the saber

S: I laugh every time

S: completely unfunny fucking scene and all but lmao

S: it's just...actually a dramatic asshole cat

C: Yeeeep XD

S: swatting at padawans instead of glasses

C: lol

S: go home and take a nap Vader jfc

C: He'd swat glasses too, let's be honest.

S: LOL I saw that vividly and it just isnt getting less funny

S: every time there's some manner of boring Imperial Bullshit Meeting

S: doesn't even use the Force after like 10 years

C: lolololol

S: just casually reaching out and slowly shoving Tarkin's water glass off the table like BITCH SAY SOMETHING

C: I am just picturing the whole asshole raptor video, but with Vader instead.

S: Palps like -sigh- everyone ignore him so he stops it. LLOLOLOL

S: omfg I forgot asshole raptor

S: YES

C: XD

S: this is absolutely one of those things that's funny at first but then you cant unsee it lol

S: and every god damn time it's funnier

C:

Tarkin: "Don't you dare." Vader: -moves glass slightly to the left- Tarkin: "Vader..." Vader: -moves it again a little more- Tarkin: "Don't you--" Vader: -knocks off glass cutting Tarkin off-

S: LMFAO

C: XD

S: proceeds to pull the final insult move of just looking at nothing, as if you just fucking hallucinated that this all happened

C: Yesssss

C: XD

C: Damn I wish I could draw

S: ME TOO

S: two hours later...

Vader:...I have reason to be concerned about the mental health of Tarkin. Sheevs: ... Vader: He's insisting I did some foolishness with his water glass earlier. Sheevs: I literally watched you do that. Vader: did you, though?

C: LMAO

S: In two weeks Vader has managed to make everyone in the upper echelons of the Empire question their own sanity

C: -cackles-

S: additional thought: asshole cat vader au, krennic lives slightly longer because he discovered the effectiveness of laser pointers

S: eventually, this back fires when logic finally dictates that attacking the source of the red dot is what one should do

C: lololololol

C: omg yes, Krennic with all his airs being knocked over on his ass, cape over his head, hair all floofed

S: lolololol yeeessss

C: All evidence is instantly erased of this incident, because can't have Tarkin seeing that.

S: No definitely not lmao

S: disheveled, horrified Krennic screaming while he's drug off into the shadows like a half dead bird into the Vader Cave

C: Ends up having to bargain his cape to leave.

S: Palps: please stop bringing me these… Vader, standing there like ? amid a pile of mostly dead Rebels and at least three Imperial Admirals

S: LOL YES

C: Thrawn is the smart one, he gives Vader proper enrichment time.

S: Yeah Thrawn would be the only one to survive lmao

C: XD

C: And let's be honest, Thrawn is kind of an asshole cat himself. lol He's the superior alpha male asshole cat.

S: lol exactly, he has personal experience here, can handle this situation

C: XD

[magpiewords]

Sugar and Snow

This was way too much fun to write. Text-talk style is my guilty pleasure. The title isn’t my best, but half the story is about a ski trip and half of it is about sufganiyot.

It was the sixth night and no one was home. Steve shouldn’t have been surprised, they were all busy people. The fact that nothing alien or super powered had threatened the world in the past few weeks was a miracle all on it’s own. He was grateful for the peaceful days they had together, but he was left wanting more as he stood alone in the kitchen, mading a single sandwich out of leftover brisket. There weren’t even any latkas left to heat up, and he really didn’t feel like making more if he was just by himself.

He was on the last bites of his sandwich when his phone buzzed. A lone text message from Tony. [check snapchat]

Steve was just happy with was in actual English instead of whatever amalgamation of emojis the genius was prone to communicate with. Bucky had picked up on that new language fast enough, which seemed to give everyone else clearance to speak solely in pictures on the team group text. They were having so much fun and Steve didn’t have the heart to tell them he felt left out.

Snapchat wasn’t as bad. It took him a little longer than everyone else to figure out, but once he did, he loved it. It was still more pictures than words, but it was pictures of real life. Usually it was selfies or sneaky pictures of Clint asleep at a stakeout. The stickers were really fun and everyone seemed to enjoy the drawings Steve could create after Natasha had given him a stylus.

He opened the app, noticing several notifications waiting for him on the team thread. A video of Sam walking past some birds on his way to meet with an advisor for his master’s degree, a series of photos in which Bucky braided Thor’s hair, and finally, one photo from Tony.

The geo-filter said Los Angeles in a fancy type, and the image was of a giant donut sign above a building. The caption must have been what he wanted Steve to see.

[THEY MAKE SUFGANIYOT AND IM SCREAMING want some???]

The rest of the picture was filled with heart-eye emojis and what looked like water droplets. Steve chuckled to himself and snapped a photo of his open palm. It only took a minute to doodle a cartoon donut on the image.

[I would love one.]

Tony didn’t reply for a while, but Steve had already put his phone away and made himself comfortable in the living room. Everyone else had missions and meetings and “Thor’s never been skiing so we’re going upstate for the day”, but Steve had things to do too. Important things like…

Well, he had his sketch book and some podcasts. That was fine.

It could have been five minutes or a few hours, but Steve’s phone turned on and didn’t seem to stop. He scrambled to pull it out of his pocket; it would only go off like this if he was getting a phone call which probably meant villainy had finally stopped taking a vacation. If that was the case, though, wouldn’t Jarvis be alerting him too?

Instead of a phone call, he was rapidly getting a string of text messages.

TStark: buck how could u fail us like this???

Bucky: wut im skiing i literally did nothing

Widow: winter soldier sucks at winter sports btw

Bucky: fuck off

Hawkeye: haha i want pics

TStark: no shut up

TStark: steve’s never had Sigmund Freud

TStark: i mean stuff and yaks

TStark: autocorrect bullshit i cant do this while flying

Col.Rhodes: DON’T TEXT AND FLY

Col.Rhodes: We talked about this

TStark: S U F G A N I Y O T

Widow: omg bucky how could u

Steve had barely caught up with the string of texts when his snapchat notified him again. It was from Natasha’s account, but someone else was filming. Likely Thor, if the camera half being covered by a thumb was anything to go by. The video featured Natasha and Bucky, both on skis at the bottom of a slope they must have just come down. With one solid shove, she pushed him into a snow bank. There was shouting and laughter before the video cut out.

Bucky: tony i need a new phone tash got snow in mine

TStark: haha nice

TStark: but seriously

TStark: every1 get home asap so we can eat these

Hawkeye: dont u have an AM meeting tomorrow?

Col.Rhodes: Pepper is not going to be happy about this.

Another snapchat notification, this time with a photo taken from the Iron Man armor’s outside cameras. Tony didn’t just have a box of donuts, he had a crate, carrying it on the suit’s shoulders like he would carry building materials. The photo was surrounded by thumbs up emojis and a small bit of text in the corner. Steve leaned in, just barely reading it before the image timed out.

[I told Sir that I do not approve]

Steve chuckled again, glancing up at the ceiling. “He giving you too much trouble, Jarvis?”

“At least I got him to stop texting and flying. The trade off is I have to type his messages for him. And he is very particular about the placement of those emoticons.” The AI sounded the closest Steve had ever heard him to exhausted.

Another video came in, this time from Sam. The camera was facing him as he walked across campus.

“I was in a meeting,” He sounded furious, but it was too over the top. Steve knew what a truly angry Sam sounded like, so this must be played up for a joke. “In a meeting with my graduate advisor and my phone sounds like the end of the world. She asks me if it’s Avengers business and I have to look her dead in the eye, with all you still texting me, and tell her to ignore it.” The camera rapidly moved as Sam seemed to throw up his hands. “Now she thinks I value my studies over saving the world and you know what, right now I think I do!”

The video ended, followed with a short text message.

Falcon: You guys suck

The rest of the team replied with a series of different emojis, ranging from laughing symbols to something with birds that was probably a Falcon related joke Steve didn’t quite get.

Falcon: T I want those donuts when I get home

TStark: what’s that birdy? i should go faster??

Jarvis: Sir is already breaking several interstate flight regulations, please do not encourage him.

Col.Rhodes: damnit sam

Widow: save some for us!

“Iron Man should be landing at the tower in fifteen minutes.” Jarvis reported. Steve could hear the coffee machine in the kitchen start to power up. “Mr. Wilson will be arriving in twenty. Agent Romanoff, Sergeant Barnes, and Thor are leaving the ski lodge and are due home in just under two hours.”

“You work way too hard, Jarvis.” Steve slid his phone to silent, knowing Jarvis would tell him if there was anything important, and went back to sketching.

“Captain, you have no idea.”

Exactly fifteen minutes later, Tony was on the landing platform outside the tower windows. He all but dragged the crate into the kitchen, opening it and pulling out smaller cardboard boxes. He walked into the living room with a spring in his step, pastry in one hand, cell phone in the other.

“Those don’t look like your usual donuts, Tony.” Steve said. It looked more like a small cake with powdered sugar on top.

Tony didn’t say a word, just kept the camera on Steve as he shoved the pastry in the soldier’s face. Steve took a bite, jelly gushing around the sides as flavor overwhelmed his senses. His eyes must have been comically wide as Tony started laughing before lowering his phone. A few seconds later, as Steve was cradling the donut to prevent any jelly or crumbs from getting on the couch, his own phone went off. He let out a sigh, half annoyed despite the something warm curling inside him, knowing the rest of the team would get to share the moment of his first sufganiyot with him.

<prev> <next>

[ndhoney]

Dealing with intense emotions

So this is gonna be a post on dealing with extreme emotions in ways so that we not only lessen the damage we have on those surrounding us but we also learn how to cope better with our emotions and lead healthier lives. Now i understand that these kinda of things often cant go away or be cured. But they can be lessened or controlled??? Idk if im saying hat right but i highly recommend everyone tries this stuff. Anyways onto the things.

1) so first of all, probably the most important first step is to not react immediately. When starting off you can react inwardly as that is hard to control, but when you start getting irrationally angry or sad or whatever it is distance yourself from the situation and don't outwardly react. You don't need to ignore what you are feeling, in fact it would be great to think about how you are feeling, talk about it with someone you care about, and or reflect on it. But don't act on any impulses. I understand that this will be extremely hard and tempting. But please. Step away from the situation and take deep breaths. Keep that up for about five minutes in an empty room sitting down or pacing, whatever keeps you calm. Wait at least an hour before doing anything. Once you have given yourself a proper amount of time to truly reflect on everything and look around at the whole situation you are currently in. If you find yourself to have been uselessly overreacting (as i often do myself) then at least you didn't end up doing anything you may regret and fall into a spiral of guilt over. And if you were in a bad or abusive situation you gave yourself time to realize that this is a bad situation and think on what your next steps should be to get yourself away from those situations.

2) now that we have managed to control the emotion for the time being, we should find a healthy way to get rid of it/disperse it. Some people find it helpful to go take a walk or jog, and some find it useful to take up meditation. I'll take about as many things as i can think of at this time. If any of you readers can think of any more please do reblog this and add on your ways of dispersing pent up emotions

Meditation Ok ok here me out before you write this off as some suburban white mom who thinks you can solve anything with meditation. I get it, meditation has gotten a really bad wrap in the mental illness community cause a bunch of know it alls came in and pretended like this would fix everything in the world. Well it wont, but meditation does have real benefits and helpful things about it. Just like any tool, while it cant solve everything, it can help you fix some of it. So to start off, meditation is classified as a state of thoughtless awareness. What this means is that it is a state of awareness. It is a calm and silent, yet completely aware state of mind. Clearing our head of thoughts and anxieties while still remaining aware of our surroundings and being in control. There are many ways many different people use to achieve this. But one of the most common ways a person starting to meditate is by isolating themselves outside, close their eyes and just let their senses take over. Listening to the birds chirp, and feeling the slight breeze on their face. The slight tickle of grass blades between their feet. And the smell of flowers in bloom. Even if you live in a populated city where its noisy and can feel chocking. You can still meditate. As its all about isolating yourself from your thoughts of the past and future, focusing on the present and what is happening around you. Hearing the cars drive by, noise floating from the left ear to the right. The sun glaring down on your skin. Just focus on what your senses are telling you. I hope this can help

Art A lot of people find art to be calming. Even if you aren't amazing or talented. Even if you haven't ever tried to draw before you can start right now. There are many different styles of art, so try whichever one makes you the most peaceful, its ok if you have to keep changing the style. Finding the right kind can be very hard. When angry or sad a lot of people make vent art, which is art that tells what you are feeling.

Excersize Others take up excersize to help. Running or jogging, kickboxing or even taking a walk. It doesnt have to be anything extravagant. But i do have to warn you not to push yourself to the point of injury. Often people resort to this when feeling emotions such as anger or jealousy. It an help get rid of any left over energy you might be holding onto.

Those are all i can think of currently but honestly anything you enjoy can be used as a tool to disperse the emotion

If anyone has any other helpful suggestions that have worked for you or others you know with controlling emotions please feel free to reblog this and add on

And above all else please remember if you want or need anyone to talk to my inbox/messages are always open.

[fanfic-collection]

Loki x Reader: Swan Song - Ch 2

(This is where reader/you shows up) (this is not technically a happy fic, lots of death, just warning)

Sharpe sighed, stepping away from Natasha.

Her breathing came in short sharp breaths, tears streaming down her cheeks. She watched warily as Sharpe cleaned the thin blade off with a cloth before setting it down amongst the tray of instruments.

“As a child, I would sometimes rip the legs off spiders, just to watch them squirm helplessly. It was fascinating, I often wondered what their pleas would sound like.” Sharpe strolled around the room, hand sliding over the back of Natasha’s chair as he moved. “I imagine they would plead for me to stop. Don’t you think?” He glanced at her.

“You’re one sick bastard.” Natasha growled, though her voice was weak.

“I’m told as much.” He breathed in deeply before once more glancing down at his watch. “I think we’re done here.”

“What?” Natasha looked up warily.

Sharpe shrugged. “You bore me. The sounds you make are delightful, and watching you squirm is enticing, I’ll give you that, but you can’t sing like the bird.” He sighed, shaking his head sadly. “Oh well.” Then his face hardened and in a tone that one might discuss the weather he ordered, “Kill her.”

Turning and strolling lazily from the room, Sharpe didn’t bother looking back over his shoulder. The door slid shut once he was in the hall and Natasha was left tied to her chair.

She breathed in and out slowly, trying to calm her breathing, or at least draw her focus away from the pain but to no avail.

“So this is it boys?” She tried to straighten up in her seat but the pain was too much.

“Nothing personal, miss.”

“Wait!” The guard hesitated, “Please…” she whispered softly.

“I… I cant.”

Natasha lowered her voice and mumbled quietly.

“What?”

She mumbled again.

The guard slowly stepped towards her and bent down to listen better.

Summoning the last of her strength, Natasha head-butted the man, knocking him to the ground. As the other guard aimed to shoot, she heard gunfire and flinched.

Then she opened her eyes and realized the second guard was dead. Her heart skipped a beat and she looked up at the vents.

“Clint?”

Clint jumped down and ran to her, “Don’t worry Tasha, I got you.” He smiled as he deftly untied her.

“We have to get out of here. There’s too many.”

Clint nodded, “Agreed. I don’t know what we’re dealing with, but it’s not normal. C’mon.”

“How do we get out? There’s invisible walls.” She panted as she stood up, leaning heavily on Clint to catch her breath.

“I found an exit in the vents. Come on, let’s go.” Clint helped her in before squeezing past and leading the way out.

As she crawled, unease twisted knots in her stomach: this was too easy, there’s no way it could be this easy. Minutes passed and then they were outside.

Between the two spies’ abilities, they were able to fight their way to a garage and steal a vehicle. Then they were in a car and cruising away at top speed, desperate to get away from Sharpe and his building. They could call for backup. But for now, they just had to escape.

Natasha forced the doubt from her mind, none of that mattered, they just had to get away. Clint drove and she finally sank into sleep, exhausted after everything. Clint gently squeezed her knee before returning his focus to the road. They would make it. They would call in backup, and they would make it.

He watched as a distant city started to grow larger and larger. Clint’s heart soared with hope.

“Tasha, we got this… we-“

A red light flickered once and the vehicle erupted in flames, wrenching it apart.

Natasha was thrown from the car, tossed like a ragdoll before hitting the ground and rolling a few feet. The sound of sirens slowly filled the air and she slowly opened her eyes.

Everything was out of focus, sounds were distorted and flames… flames were everywhere.

“Clint.” She gasped. A strong breeze cut through the air, briefly clearing smoke from the car. “No…” Natasha breathed out as darkness engulfed her.

Still smiling in relief, sitting in the driver’s seat and staring lifelessly ahead was agent Clint Barton, codename Hawkeye.

A chunk of metal stood out of his chest as blood trickled down the side of his mouth.

Sharpe leaned against the rail separating the meeting style portion of the room from a series of computers all set to run a building of this size. Countless people diligently worked away at their computer stations, mindful of their boss’ ever watchful gaze.

“Sir,” Sharpe looked over at the guard who had spoken to him. “Agent Romanoff has escaped.”

“Alone?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

The guard shook his head, “No, Barton returned for her through the vents.”

Sharpe nodded, “I wasn’t particularly expecting that, but I’m certainly not surprised. I take it they stole a vehicle?”

The guard nodded. “We have a confirmation. Agent Barton is dead, Romanoff is still alive, we have reason to believe she’ll make it. The local rescue services picked her up.”

Sharpe frowned thoughtfully. “Yes, she will definitely live for now. I like the thought of seeing her again.” He nodded to himself, “One down, five to go.”

“How do you plan on getting rid of Thor? If I might ask…”

Sharpe smiled wickedly, “Thor?” A shimmer of green started to fade over him. “I’m sure I can think of something for my dear brother.” Sharpe’s hair slowly darkened and grew longer. His icy blue eyes glowed and returned to an emerald green.

In Sharpe’s place stood Loki, god of mischief.

“Mischief…” He breathed slowly, “No, that is mere child’s play. A toy I’ve well used and tossed aside. This. This is chaos. This world will succumb to me in flames.”

You strode into the room, coming to a stop beside Loki, your hand slid down his arm sensually before stopping and resting on his hand. You carefully stroked the back of it before leaning over and leaving a trail of kisses down his throat and jaw.

“When do we start, my love?” You whispered softly.

Loki turned towards you, his eyes darkened by lust as he slid a hand down your side, stopping to stroke circles on your hip. He leaned down and kissed you, lips moving in sync passionately before pulling away to catch his breath. “Perhaps a little later than sooner…” He growled. His other hand slid down your side and pulled you closer to him, “I think you and I have some business to attend to first.”

Loki rolled off you, onto his back beside you, still breathing heavily. You were still gasping, coming off your high and trying to calm yourself.

Your eyes finally drifted shut and you smiled as you spoke, “I missed you too.”

Loki laughed, his eyes also shut as he breathed in deeply. “Was it that obvious?”

You rolled onto your side, hooking your bare leg over his thigh and pulled yourself tight against him. Then you propped yourself up on your elbow while gently stroking his bare chest. “I can always read you like a book.”

Loki hummed at your touch before opening his green eyes to look at you lovingly. “Yes, I suppose so.”

“I also take it you need me now.” You pursed your lips. Acting as a temptress on behalf of Loki wasn’t always pleasant. The thrill of the game kept you at it and you knew how much it pleased your lover, and the devilish things he would do made it worth it; but all those still came at a cost.

Loki laced his fingers around yours and sighed, “I always need you my love.” He smiled, glancing up at you and pressing soft kisses to your hand.

You smirked before rolling onto his chest and staring down at him. You raised your eyebrows. “Yes, that’s true.” You gently kissed his lips. “Tell me.”

“The soldier.”

You hummed thoughtfully, tilting your head to the side, “Do you have any ideas?”

Loki closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead tiredly, “I’m working on it. For now I figured it best to simply get you close to him.”

“What of the beast?”

Loki gently stroked your shoulder, “He, I have plans for. Until Thor realizes I’m no longer in prison, I’ll leave those two alone.”

You bit your lip, “Do you think you’d let me break the famous Mr. Stark’s heart?”

Loki scowled. “I don’t want his filthy hands anywhere near you my precious dove.”

You softly kissed Loki’s jaw before slowly sliding your tongue down his throat and planting kisses on his chest. Loki moaned into your touch, arching his neck to be closer to you, then you pulled away. “I love the sounds you make.”

“You tempt me too much… I could lie here beside you and never leave.” Loki murmured.

Adjusting your position, you slid lower on his stomach to straddle his hips. Loki gazed up at you, trying to ignore your breasts hanging just above him as you tried to ignore the growing hardness in the cleft of your ass. “How will you possibly get a throne if we only do this?”

Loki grazed his hands up and down your sides before stopping at your hips and rubbing cool circles on them with his chilly fingers. “From this position, I have quite the view.” He chuckled.

You ground your hips down briefly, “You’re ready again?” You asked in mild disbelief.

Loki smirked, “You doubt my capabilities?” He slowly slid his hands along your things, gently stroking them.

You could see his internal struggle in his eyes, mirroring the one you felt. Lie here for a while longer or…

You bit your lip, “Just a quick one?”

Loki grinned and nodded, “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”

This time after you finished, you forced yourself to move away and wrap yourself in your robe. Your hips were sore and likely to bruise, and you felt weak, a dazed smile unable to leave your face.

“I’m going to shower.” Loki sat up slowly. “Alone.” You added forcefully, to which Loki only pouted. “When I’m done, have my look planned. I’m sure you can think of someone to attract the soldier with.”

Loki sighed, flopping back down onto his back and lacing his fingers behind his head. He closed his eyes and nodded. “Perhaps you can look like that one woman he used to care for.” Loki murmured tiredly.

“Carter? Something Carter?” You asked as you slowly stood up.

Loki nodded, “Yes, that one.” He opened his eyes to gaze at you again. “You won’t be as beautiful as you are now, but if we play on any sentimental feelings he has buried for her…” Loki trailed off.

You nodded thoughtfully before bending over and kissing him once more. Then you turned and made sure to make a show of swaying your hips as you strolled into the bathroom.

“Don’t tempt me too much,” You heard Loki’s growl from the other side of the door, “or I’ll come in after you.”

You simply laughed before stepping into the shower. If you had locked the door, he would have teleported in anyway. And if you had pointed it out, he would have taken it as a challenge, best to stop your teasing where it was.

You finished your shower and got out, dripping wet, before tightly wrapping a towel around yourself and returning to the bedroom. Loki was snoring softly.

“Hello lover.”

His eyes flickered open and with a wave of his hand, you felt a familiar prickling sensation rolling over your skin. Loki scowled but nodded his approval.

You glanced back in the mirror and saw that your features had melded into someone quite different. You bore a strong resemblance to Peggy Carter, but still managed to look like someone completely different. Loki had done quite well with this spell.

You were similar enough to call the agent to mind, but not too similar to cause confusion or suspicion. You needed Steve Rogers’ instinctual trust of looking like his old friend, but not suspicion of being a complete twin.

“Fantastic.” You smiled.

Loki shrugged, “The magic yes, but the appearance no. I suppose knowing that you look like this will make the distasteful nature of your work more bearable. He won’t gaze on what is truly and rightfully mine.”

“Yes, well, I saw you cozying up awfully close to that Romanoff bitch.” You muttered as you got dressed. “The street is two way.”

Loki smirked again, “I’m glad to know I can still make you jealous.” He teased.

“Careful that I don’t try and stick a blade between her ribs myself.”

Loki wrapped the sheet around his waist before coming over and hugging you from behind. “Patience love, you can take your anger out soon enough, but I want her alive for now. And I really need you to do this.”

You smiled softly and gently stroked his arms. “Only because I love you.”

“There will be a cover story by the time you get to New York and your apartment. Do be safe.” Loki kissed your cheek, his stomach churning in dislike at your foreign features.

“You too, my king, we shall get you a throne soon enough.” You turned and walked out of the room, knowing better than to look back.

Loki nodded in satisfaction as he watched you go, though jealousy coiled knots within himself. “And you shall be beside me, my queen.”

[rosyredlipstick]

Could you please write something about Mitchell/Travis and Stefan/Ellis on a double date?

Okay so im like 80% percent sure you meant to type Mitchell\Connor bUT THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST PROMPTS I’VE RECEIVED AND NOW I CANT STOP LOL SORRY NOT SORRY

-

“He should be here any minute.” Mitchell grinned across the booth to his youngest brother, his eyes twinkling a bit at the sight of the large arm swung over his shoulders. He turned to his brother’s companion with a bright smile, “Do you enjoy Italian food, Ellis?”

The large boy in question shrugged a bit, always the quietest. It was a strange complementing contradiction to Stefan’s large and loud personality, but it worked better than Mitchell could have ever pretended.

Ellis still looking over the menu, his eyes a bit critical. “It’s good carbs.” He finally said, “It’ll be good for my work-out tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow’s leg day.” Stefan told Mitchell, his voice a bit swooning, his eyes a bit starry. “I tag along sometimes too!”

Ellis shot Stefan an obviously fond look. “You saying you tag along implies that you can keep up with me, sweetheart.”

Stefan frowned a playful look. “I can too keep up -”

“Sweetums!”

Mitchell froze in place, his hands mid action as he ripped open a roll of bread, his mouth mid laughter at Stefan’s whiny voice.

Both Ellis and Stefan trained their gazes over Mitchell’s shoulder, Stefan’s mouth falling open as he caught sight of their new companion.

“Hey honey-bunny.” Travis Stoll grinned down at him as he pushed himself into the leather booth, sliding in so he was pressed much-too-close to Mitchell’s side.

Mitchell automatically pushed away from him, his eyes wide, his hands still frozen in position. Travis plucked the bread from his hands and began to slather it into the untouched butter in the middle of the table. “Hey love-birds! How are you guys? To be honest, totally thought this whole thing was a rumor at first -” He gestured to the both of them with the butter knife, a fleck of the horribly oily butter landing on the table next to Ellis’s clenched hand, “But I’m glad to see it isn’t! Out of everyone, I had good money on you two. Good to see I’m right again, and that I’m several drachmas richer!”

Mitchell finally managed to shake himself out of his frozen shock. “What - what? Travis, what are you doing here? Where’s Connor? How in the world did you find us?”

“Connor couldn’t make it.” Travis grinned charmingly over at him. “So I came instead!”

“What did you do to him.” Mitchell whispered, his voice coated in horror.

Travis ignored him, “And Katie’s totally cool with it! Or, I told her I was going on a date with an Aphrodite child and she told me she’d set your cabin on fire, which honestly means it’s probably totally completely fine?” He shrugged, stuffing half a roll of bread into his mouth and talking through it, crumbs flying everywhere. Mitchell could distantly hear Stefan making noises of terror as the crumbs landed on the sleeves of his Burberry button down. “I mean, the Hermes cabin has been fireproof for years now, Aphrodite is too right?”

“Not even a little bit.” Stefan answered softly, probably thinking back to the numerous close calls they’ve had after too many hair straighteners, curlers, and flat-irons have been plugged in at once. Mitchell had to suppress a shudder as well.

Mitchell shook his head again, his hand coming up to run through his hair. He took a breath before speaking.

“Travis.” Mitchell’s voice was hard. “You can leave.”

“But darling -” Travis gave him a wide-eyed look, “How else will you go on a double date with your lovely brother and his handsome boyfriend?”

“With my actual boyfriend.” Mitchell told him through clenched teeth. “Now again, what did you do to him.”

Travis waved his hand through the air, “Oh, he’s fine.” Travis thought about that, “Probably. Depending how on much he struggles, at least.”

Mitchell took a deep, steadying breath, his hands waving to twitch to the weapon at his side. Ellis, across the table, looked to be considering the same. His approval for the other boy gained a few points.

“Why are you here, Travis? Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“But Mitchell, honey. You see -” Travis laid an arm over Mitchell’s shoulders, and Mitchell had to very carefully consider how fond Connor was of his older brother. And how disappointed the other boy might be if Travis returned with significantly less arms. Travis, the asshole, continued speaking. “I’ve always thought we’ve had this certain connection. A certain draw of our souls, you could call it.” Travis gave him a longing look, a certain hysterical laughter hiding behind false emotion in his eyes. “And who are we to deny the fates?”

At that moment, Mitchell’s phone buzzed and with a quick, single glance at the message, he knew the course of action.

A quick grab and snap later, Mitchell was climbing over Travis’s cursing figure and sliding over the leather to the other side. He pulled out a few bills - to cover their drinks, the only part of the meal they’d gotten to - and threw them on the table before standing.

“You broke his wrist.” Stefan told him incredulously, scrambling out of the booth after him.

“You broke his wrist.” Ellis repeated, grinning, a bit too overjoyed at the violence.

Mitchell hummed, tucking his phone away and pulling out his keys. He could still hear Travis cursing after him, probably grinning while doing so, and felt absolutely no regret.

“Connor’s tied to the top of the volcanic rock climbing wall.” Mitchell glanced back to the booth where Travis was still lying, now laughing and probably flirting with the overconcerned waitress. “And the Apollo kids can handle him. Let’s go.”

Just before he pushed the heavy restaurant doors open, he could very softly hear Ellis’s whisper to Stefan, “Your older brother is so cool.”

[comicteaparty]

February 4th-February 10th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from February 4th, 2019 to February 10th, 2019.  The chat focused on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Offshore Comic by Stefan Gasic~! (http://www.offshorecomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PST), so keep checking back for more! You have until February 10th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite strip in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 3. Given the comic’s focus on financial markets and all that composes them, what is something this comic has taught you about the subject? Alternatively, what is something you wished you understood better to understand the comic’s comedy?

QUESTION 4. How do you think the comic’s illustrative style and choices help the comedy of the comic? What is one moment where a particular design or image really stood out to you and helped the point the strip was trying to convey?

QUESTION 5. The comic features several recurring subjects like the legitimacy of IQ scores, LLCs, and more. Which of these recurring topics did you like the most? What about it caught your interest?

Stefan G

Hello everyone, 1) Just updated www.offshorecomic.com with a new strip. Check it out. 2) RebelVampire, are your questions intended for me or any new reader? Ciao, Stefan the creator of #Offshorecomic

snuffysam

They're intended for both (still working through the archive)!

keii4ii

Is there a way to get permalinks for individual strips, so I can come back to specific ones at a later time?

Stefan G

Thanks & okay, snuffysam keii4ii, unfortunately there’s no way to get permalinks for individual strips ... I coded the website myself as a side project and am not that good a coder

keii4ii

Oh man, I can relate to that... If I ever get rich, comic website coding and maintenance stuff is the first thing I'll hire someone to do for me

I do like how it loads and makes it easy to read through the archive, for what it's worth.

Stefan G

Thanks for the feedback ... and I totally, totally agree. One could spend a fortune for a coder to take care of all the fixings and stuff ... now I’m learning on the side whenever there’s time left over from work & family.

Stefan G

Answer to Q1 => readers have found the “happiness” strip the best. It’s also one of my favourite ones [succinct & clever & relatable] ...I truly don’t have a favourite strip, but the attached Reto & Urs -strips make me chuckle whenever I read them [I appreciate below-the-waist-humour and/or humour where people are really, really selfish].

lomcia (princess_lom)

1. The newest one is so funny

2. Trader

3. i dont work in office but i cant find nothing to improve that comic, i think the design of characters and humor is on really high lvl 12/10 for me

4. Style is perfect ffor that comic, i wouldnt change it

Stefan G

Answer to Q2 => at the moment my favourite character is the Economist. He’s a genuine IYI [intellectual-yet-idiot] ... which the world is full of and the finance industry in particular. The Economist is easy to write for because I’ve discovered a never ending source of humorous material called the daily financial newspaper ... please find attached also one of my favourite strips

Thank you, lomcia (princess_lom) for your feedback.

lomcia (princess_lom)

your welcome I hope i didnt misunderstood question 3 xD

Stefan G

I think you got everything just right

lomcia (princess_lom)

cool

Stefan G

Answer/comment to Q3 => I’ve spend my professional life in finance, hence, I know every nuance of the industry. However, for the layperson the finance industry [money, banking, insurance, etcetc...] is a big black box of unnecessary complication. My humble attempt with #Offshorecomic is to untangle this complexity and make money related topics more accessible/understandable to anyone ... using humour as my main tool. Finance is more stupid than you think; trust me

I’ll answer the rest tomorrow. Gotta go to now. is like in a totally different time zone and all that Thx again y’all !

RebelVampire

QUESTION 6. Which joke not related to finance did you enjoy the most? What about it made it stand out to you among all the others?

RebelVampire

1) i really enjoyed the life coaching strip about facing reality and lying to yourself. i just really enjoy the bluntness and simplicity by which the self-deception line is delivered. A+ comedy right. 2) i like p-bird because i consider him a much needed counter balance to many of the other characters. he at least has more feet planted in reality. 3) hedge funds. not that i understand them perfectly from the comic, but now theyre more than just a financial word i see tossed around. and despite the very negative absurdist humor regarding them, was still interesting to get some insight into what they actually involved. 4) i think the style overall really balances well with the comedy. a lot of the comedy is reliant on the dialogue, so keeping the illustrations clean, bold, and somewhat simple really helps direct attention to the words. i also really just enjoy the character designs cause every single one really hits that idiot or absurdist mark that needs to be hit. 5) actually i really liked the address of IQ scores. because literally these characters seem like the type whod wind up on r/iamverysmart and use their IQs to talk about how cool they are. so it was kind of nice to see some evidence for that with the subject. that and i always like seeing the concept of IQ being torn apart. 6) i actually liked a lot of the jokes that pertained to the academic sphere in regards to things like publishing and teaching. selfishly it most just stood out to me because academia is something im more familiar with in regards to its simultaneous setup of worthless class structures and cutthroat profs trying to further their careers.

Stefan G

Thank you, RebelVampire, for your thoughtful analysis & feedback I believe that the writing is the most important part in comics ... and the best humorous writing is often blunt & simple [you hit the nail on the head with that comment]. Furthermore, I intentionally designed the strip in a simplistic style in order to A) highlight the writing/gag, B) to save time and C) cuz simple drawings are funny I love to make fun of pompous, self righteous folks ... academics are thus some of my main targets [due to the same reasons I make fun of financial professionals].

Stefan G

Answer to Q4 => My childhood inspiration and spark for cartoons/drawing came from F.Ibanez [Clever & Smart] ... very funny yet simple style. Nowadays I enjoy Dilbert by Scott Adams or the political cartoons from cartoonist Jari Elsilä; also both of them are hilarious without wasting unnecessary lines. I believe a straightforward style highlights the writing and that’s what I’m trying to achieve. Moreover, I love to have backgrounds in my comics [to steer the reader to a particular thought or mood] but hate to draw them and/or dislike it when they clutter the cartoon ... I’m rather happy with a style that I’ve developed over time where I draw the background but reduce the opacity to 25 %. I think that works pretty nice

Stefan G

Answer to Q5 => My favourite themes are 1) anyone predicting the future, 2) mistaking luck for awesome skill and 3) incompetent yet pompous professionals ... there is so much hilarious material right there

Answer to Q6 => I often use the characters Reto und Urs for jokes/strips that are not necessarily financial because they are so endearingly stupid [well, mostly Urs is]. This one makes me chuckle

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. In what ways have any of the strips changed the way you think about life, finances, or any other topic covered in them? Alternatively, what have the strips portrayed that you wish more people knew?

RebelVampire

(the archive for the chat on Poco Adventures is now available https://comicteaparty.com/post/182650076295/january-28th-february-3rd-2019-ctp-archive)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 8. Of all the parodies and jabs at financial markets and life, which do you consider the most on the nose as far as its representation in the comic goes?

RebelVampire

7) the strips have made me realize in a way that this is another industry where basically theres lots of ridiculous junk going on in the background cause you can never remove human faults completely. cause when it comes to finance theres lots of advanced vocabulary and concepts being thrown around usually, so for someone untrained it can sound intimidating and hard to follow. i think these strips do a great job of humanizing things tho and showing that the concepts arent all that alien cause at the end they were created by humans and reflect the desires of humans in a way. 8) one of my faves that i think is totally on the nose is this one where the economist is telling p-bird about ppl on twitter debating him being ignorant. and that his facts and stuff will prevail but p-bird points out that wouldnt even work on the economist. and the economist goes home confused. i think this is way too true for what its like to argue on the internet and how facts and logic get infinitely buried for the sake of narrative.

Stefan G

Excellent analysis/comments, RebelVampire really constructive. The human element is everywhere and money is such an emotionally laden topic that it’s easy to get confused even without the unnecessary complicated vocabulary ...which is often misused even by so-called “professionals”. If my strip has helped you understand all of that and un-demonised the beast, you’ve made me a very happy man Yeah, the Twitter-Fact-Confusion strip is one of my more relatable strips ... I’ve given up on trying to change people’s minds with facts; if changing minds is possible, it can only be achieved through via emotions. It sounds more logical the other way around but that’s not how we work. Here’s a special academically oriented strip just for you, RebelVampire Enjoy

snuffysam

haven't been able to get all the way through the archive yet, but my answer to both #2 and #8 is the Regional Manager. I love all the characters, but there's something to be said for the simplicity of having a guy literally run around headless.

Stefan G

Thanks , snuffysam. I almost forgot about the regional manager. I have to bring him back to life; I also like him ... by the way, there are 308 strips in total.

Answer to Q7 => I can’t claim that any one strip has changed the way I think about life and/or other things ... however, I do believe that writing & drawing Offshore strips has reinforced in me some of the main ideas from my favourite author, Nassim Nicholas Taleb, who’s books have influenced me deeply [e.g. Black Swan, Antifragile, etc etc] ... luck versus skill, thinking about risk and stuff like that. I regularly come back to his books for inspiration and recommend his books & Twitter -feed. Here are two strips that highlight my point ...sort of

Answer to Q8 => wow tough question ... with 99 % of my strips I genuinely try to convey some message about basic human quirks and/or outright stupidities that actually take place on a regular basis when handling money + and then I add my own personal humours twist to it. Here are a few strips with the message never to buy something you don’t understand [a hint: they always have complicated names]...

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What other finance related topics are you hoping to see the comic explore? Which characters are you hoping to see involved with the topic?

Stefan G

Answer to Q9 => As the creator of the strip I’m obviously biased to answer this question, but I’d love to hear what the new readers have to say. I don’t have a particular preference for any topic [except make fun of pompous forecasters ] ... but I feel myself wanting to write & draw more strips for the Markets-Weasel and Reto und Urs. And that’s surprisingly hard to do; forcing it doesn’t work [at least not for me] ... Offshore’s main characters were supposed to be Reto und Urs and somehow P-Bird and the Economist and the trader stole the show. I guess that happens when you get to know your characters better. Funny how that happens ... here’s one nostalgic strip from my early work that I really enjoy

Stefan G

Addition to Q9 => ... I’ve steadily build up an audience on Twitter [@NonMeek] which consist mainly of likeminded financial and/or other professionals ...hence, hearing the viewpoints from anyone outside that sphere would be awesome

RebelVampire

QUESTION 10. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

RebelVampire

9) idk about specific topics, but id like to see the CEO who i think appeared in like one strip. I'm really interested to see the CEO dynamic with the other characters in terms of finance. learn how they view what theyre doing, how they view what the others are doing, etc. but im all for bringing the regional manager back too cause i enjoyed that character as well. a lot of great humor picking fun at how some managerial positions are kind of ridiculous to even exist to a degree. 10) learning more, mostly. overall its nice to see a harder to cover topic in comics. ive enjoyed how approachable and humanized the strips make finances, and how they remind you that professionals can be like this and actually have no clue what theyre doing. @Stefan G that academic oriented strip you shared was actually one of my faves. not necessarily in college, but i see this a lot in the blogosphere where ppl do a thing once and try to pass themselves as qualified experts to deliver advice. XD

Stefan G

@RebelVampire Thanks again for your opinions. Those really help with the development of the strip ... finance is a hard topic indeed and there are no really finance oriented strips out there [that I know of anyway], which is funny cuz the industry is filled with emotions and mind blowing mental errors. I guess people still believe finance & investing is some sort of scientific discipline which it’s really not ... there are hardly any black & white answers to anything even though there’s lots and lots of historical data ... it’s time to fix that myth with Offshore I’m glad you enjoyed that academic strip. It resonated rather well on Twitter too

@RebelVampire [adding to my previous answer] ... I agree that the managers need to be reanimated and given another chance. I’ll try to do that and see how they resonate. I never know beforehand which characters will work and which will fizzle out; e.g. der Compliance Offizier is one of my favourite characters, yet, resonates weakly outside the banking circles ‍♂️ [I love the strip below ].

keii4ii

I would like to see more strips that cracks jokes about this very specific context of finances! Things like that strip about funds blowing up on day 252. I think that gives this comic its own flavor. Readers get to laugh about not just any kind of incompetent people, but incompetent people in this specific field. Readers with no background in finances don't know the context, so more strips that shed light on the context of the jokes would be great.

Stefan G

@keii4ii All valid and excellent points ... I genuinely try to write & design my cartoons in such a way that the joke is understandable even though you don’t know the context. It’s a hard thing to do ... my wife is my toughest critic and she tells me the same as you ... but keep following Offshore and I promise to come up with more stuff like that 252 strip

Answer to Q10 => My ambition with Offshore is to 1) amuse myself first and see if anyone shares my sense of humour [if a cartoon doesn’t amuse me, I don’t publish it]. It’s a splendid way of letting out some frustration from work ... and 2) to make investing & finance more approachable to the layperson by infusing some humour into it in the form of cartoons ... which by the way nobody thought of doing on a serious basis. Weird. However, to produce material on a semi-regular basis I figured that writing only gags/jokes is too much work and/or too shallow of an approach, hence, the characters in the strip need to be interesting/relatable enough in order to create humorous material by mere interaction with each other. That’s easier said than done. I’m quite satisfied with my characters so far but am continuously looking for new interesting characters to add to the strip [either permanently or impermanently]. Like Scott Adams once told me: “The trick with comics is to reflect the reader's own experience. To allow people to say, "That's me!" I’ll conclude with this sneak peek strip [only for you guys] that should relate to the experience of anybody working in a big corporation.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Offshore Comic this week! Please also give a special thank you to Stefan Gasic for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Offshore Comic, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://www.offshorecomic.com/

Stefan’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/NonMeek

[sabraeal]

Headcannon: Haki likes to play games with Izana, especially when she knows something that he doesn't. It's usually something minor and completely useless, but it drives Izana mad (low key of course) until he figures it out. But thats her favorite part of these games, because when he does figure it out the sex is great.

(Part Three of a series. Part One. Part Two.)

He must be made to trust her.

After the anger has faded and the wounds to her pride scabbed over, that is the thought that comes to her on her wedding night and every one thereafter. Until it can be proven to my satisfaction, he said, and that is the soil in which she plants her hopes in. She is no spy, and it should be all too easy to show that her allegiance lies with the crown.

Or at least it will, as soon as she is sure her royal husband does not mean to tear the North asunder.

He comes to her chambers every night for a week; she greets him warmly in front of her ladies. In their sight he acts like a loving bridegroom, if a bit restrained. Nothing that could not be explained by the dignity of his position. When she sends them away, blushing prettily at their sly smiles, his mask is promptly discarded, and he makes for the passage between their rooms.

“Why do you come at all, then?” she asks, trying to smooth the spite from her voice. She will keep his secret – their secret – but he owes her an explanation, at the least. “If you cannot abide me.”

He hesitates a moment, eyebrows lifted in surprise. “We are just married.” He smiles at that, strangely soft. “And – what is it they always say about newlyweds? – they cannot keep their hands off each other.”

She is wroth to find her first thought is, then you should not keep your hands off me.

If she is to prove her worth to him, she must impress him; she must show him she can offer him something that no one else can.

It must be a surprise. Which means it cannot be done in front of her ladies.

An easier thing said than done. They are around her always during the day, kind if a bit quiet. Now that she has had more than a few hours to know them, she sees that they are not a bevy of eligible maids, as she had original thought, but unmarried woman closer to her own age. None of them seem to be much interested in the young bucks at court, instead suggesting they take walks through the gardens – world-renowned, they assure her, though none of them have seen the hothouses of Lyrias – or painting by the river, or, on poorer days, needlepoint inside.

If his personality did not make it impossible, she might suspect rather uncharitable reasons for his selection of these women. It would not be the first time a king hid his mistresses in his wife’s entourage.

But there are no jealous glares, no posturing, and – miraculously – no in-fighting. Instead they are a gentle touch at her elbow, a helpful comment whispered in her ear. If she’s not careful, she might find herself trusting them.

Still, duping them is child’s play. This is not her first time escaping her chaperone.

The Queen Dowager intends to stay at Wistal for a few weeks after the wedding. Haki finds herself torn: on the one hand she is glad of it, for they have always gotten on, as close as two women may be who are not mother and daughter; but at the same time it is clear that she is here to serve as distraction. Whenever her husband holds court, or he speaks with the council, she is suddenly possessed with an invitation from Her Majesty. She may not be forbidden from the room, but she is certainly being told she is not welcome.

Her Majesty’s presence also has another unpleasant side effect: informal dinner.

“You should take your wedding trip soon,” the Queen Dowager suggests, undaunted by her son’s forbidding look. “If you plan to go out of the country, you would do well to plan before autumn, otherwise the passes may freeze. You know how the mountains always snow early.”

Izana lets out a long breath through his nose, setting down his fork. “I do not think now is the time for such a thing, Mother.”

“Now is the perfect time,” she informs him blithely, in the way only a mother could. Haki hides her grin behind a napkin, pretending to dab off some of her soup course.

“Mother.” The word is said with long-suffering patience, flavored with the slightest hint of plaintiveness. “The situation here is…delicate. It would not do to have me away.“

Her Majesty arches one of her perfectly formed brows. “I think the situation could be a lot more delicate. A wedding trip would help with that.”

Her husband valiantly ignores the suggestion, appearing too taken with the roasted duck on his plate.

“I’ve heard Yuris is quite nice, this time of year,” she continues, unperturbed by her son’s reticence. “Though some say Viande is finer. More cosmopolitan.”

His mouth pulls flat, but he replies, so even, “Viande is far too young for my tastes. Later, maybe.”

His mother’s mouth curves slyly. “I’ve always preferred the islands myself.”

It is good to know that even here, her family name keeps its clout. The North does not forgive, but nor does it forget, he father had told her so many times.

She is pleased to find how true it is.

When Her Majesty leaves, her husband stops his nightly visits – but not entirely.

He takes dinner with her twice weekly, and when they have finished, he escorts her to her chambers, letting all and sundry see him slip inside. He, of course, does not stay longer than to bid her a civil goodnight.

“Am I to assume your eagerness was all a show for Her Majesty?” she asks one night before he leaves. It is a marvel how even her voice is.

“It is only natural for the ardor to cool between wed couples,” he explains, “I thought two nights would be enough so that I do not seem to be neglecting my duties, neither in the court nor…bedroom.”

She has a novel’s worth of things to say about that, but she says instead, “It just so happens to coincide with your mother’s departure.”

He flinches, but a bare moment later he is compose again, as if it had never happened. “Consider it a courtesy to you,” he tells her breezily. “Pray you never have idea how interested she is in…grandchildren.”

At last, her connections bear fruit. She is quick to pen her letter, mouth curved slyly as she slips it to her messenger.

Oh, how surprised His Majesty will be.

“I heard Her Majesty sent you a letter,” Haki starts, crossing her utensils over the soup course to signal she is ready for the next. “How is Wilant?”

It is part of her plan to ask, but as the words fall out, she find that she wants to know. Wistal is ever-summer, a paradise compared to the endless winters of the North but –

But it is her home, nonetheless. She misses it.

“Cold,” he says simply, agitated. After a long pause, he adds, “She was inquiring after a wedding trip again. She assured me it would help along some more delicate issues.”

Haki stifles a snort. She misses the woman more than she expected; she had hoped that her departure would leave her time to involve herself in council sessions, but instead there are yet more ladies to please, and she wishes instead she could beg off to walk the gardens with Her Majesty. She is far more pleasant company than most in the capital, and familiar.

She does not think her husband can be behind all of her invitations, but neither does she think it is an accident that there is always a tea or luncheon she cannot possibly miss when there is due to be a meeting.

“She favored Yuris, did she not?” Haki composes her face into a thoughtful expression. “That is where our newest councilor is from, is it not? From when you had to remove Brecker?”

“Yes,” her husband says, a little absent. “He finally tried something a little more egregious than obstructing a messenger bird. I thought it time to let Yuris’ people have a say in the way they are governed.”

It bothers how much she could like him, if he was someone that allowed himself to be liked.

“Yes, I remember now.” She presses a finger to her lips in though. “Ah, yes – the councilor. It’s the chieftain’s daughter is it not?”

“It is.”

“Kihal. I talked to her at the wedding. A bright girl.” She lifts her wine glass, taking a casual sip. “I’ve heard she’s considered a good match for the prince.”

Her husband goes curiously still.

“And the princess of Viande as well, no?” she asks, so innocent. “Akaibara. She’s quite young though. Fifteen is it? I doubt Zen would consent to such a match, if it was proposed…now.”

His mouth lifts at the corner, canting his lips into a smirk. He lays down his fork, drawing his gaze up to meet hers. “All right, wife. You have my attention.” He settles back into his chair. “What do you plan to do with it?”

“Oh!” She flutters her eyelashes prettily. “I only meant to suggest that I could be of service to you, husband.”

His long fingers drum thoughtfully on the table. “Is that so?”

“I found that out easily enough.” She tries to keep the frustration out of her voice. “And that was in a court in which I had very few connections. One might imagine I could do more with connections more familiar…”

“You would not say such a thing if you did not already have a tender morsel to give.” She flushes under his sultry look, his hooded eyes reminding her of nothing more than that she is a married woman who has not yet lain with her husband. His hand reaches out for hers, running a finger along one of the long bones of her hand. “Come now, wife. Won’t you feed your husband?”

Haki fights the urge to pull her hands away, pushing back the muzziness in her head. She mislikes how easily he can turn her thoughts to mush and her knees to jelly.

“Oh, but husband,” she sighs, leaning just so, so that her breasts brush at his wrist. “If I am to serve, then are you not to take?”

His brows draw together as if her suggestion confused him, but then his gaze drops to her decolletage, and –

“Oh,” he breathes. “You are a clever vixen, are you not?”

Two long fingers slip between the lace of her gown and the linen of her chemise, pinching her prize between them. She does not think it is her imagination that he lingers, or that his breath comes as harsh as her own. His fingers slide out, brushing over the smooth skin of her breast –

“A letter?” he says, holding the nearly folded square of parchment. She’s folded it down to hardly more than an inch; a lesson learned during interminable lessons with the other maids at Wilant. “Cunningly done.”

She shrugs, feigning humility. “There is a trick to it.”

He opens it, his eyebrows lifting as he read the contents. “Rodatrad wants to place his daughter at court?”

“He’s quite eager, so I’ve been told,” she agrees. “From what I’ve heard, only a prince will do. We don’t have very many of those at Wilant.”

“Nor are you to get very many more, if my welcome was typical,” he remarks, and when she looks up to refute him, he is smiling. He is teasing. “Very good, wife. This is good information, indeed. I will have to talk this over with my advisors, so that we may plan how to approach this.”

“Oh, husband,” she purrs, leaning further into him. “Do you not know? I will take care of you in all ways.”

He stiffens. “What do you mean?”

“It is already handled,” she tells him, pleased. “I offered her a place among my ladies.”

“You did what?” He launches from his seat, leaving her cold. “Without my permission?”

She should have expected him to be ungrateful. “You may have forgotten, since I have been so permissive, but a Queen’s entourage is of her own selection.”

“I – only by the King’s leave.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “You offered a position to a – how did you – how did you manage this? Your ladies –”

“You think I would do this in front of your spies?” she scoffs. “Do you think I am somehow new to –”

“Spies?” He stares at her as if he has never seen such a terrifying creature. “I surrounded you with the most politically adept young women that Wistal has to offer, and you – they were here to help you!”

She stares. He meant them to help? Her mind races as she recalls the last few weeks, how they were eager to impart knowledge of the other courtiers, of members of the council that crossed her path – oh, oh –

A thunderous cloud passes over his face. “Ah, but I should have known. You are far too clever to be helped.”

He throws his napkin onto the table. “I find myself weary after dinner. I think I shall go straight to bed.”

She can do little more than stare at her hands. If only he had told her –

He fixes her with one last glare. “After all, I have much to rectify tomorrow.”

[datingadviceonreddit]

Okay, so I will try to make this short! I recently went to this shitty family park with my family and a different family. They brought a daughter with them and her boyfriend, but since her bf was a junkie she dropped him and me and her became kinda close.So about 3 days after they break up we start texting and she talks with me about things like what she seeks in a relationships (normal sex life, love, and seeing eachother a few times a week) I am more of a few times per week guy (depending on my workload, which she did not seem to like) So, I make an effort to see her more often, to please her, and decide to go out with her and her friends and she sits with me at the bar (voluntarily), but this dude comes over and buys her a drink and then gets mad when I tell her I can buy her drinks, too, but she simply shrugs.Now let me be honest here: It's been about a year or two since I kinda liked someone. I am very picky. I want clean girls who can freak in bed. So we go on a second date (I take the initiative just to please her daily basis shit) we go to a park and talk a bit about pretty much nothing, after about an hour I pull her closer put my arms around her as she puts her legs on my leg and we sit there laughing. I am at this point genuinely starting to fall (trying to control myself so hard not do since it was just a second date) So I catch myself staring at her and she does as well and looks away shyly and tells me to stop, so I tell her I try but I simply cant. We sat there for hours and she even told me she enjoyed it very much and that she was starting to fall for me and I made her forget the issues she had with her ex (a cocaine junkie, who treated her like shit) So she tells me she really likes me, but I need to work out, so I started doing that (partially for her, but also mainly for me, because I had lost my shape after a mild depression, and am used to having a nice body that brings all the girls in awe)few days later I met up with a friend but she texted me she was going with her friend to that friends boyfriend but that he was bringing a friend ( the dude who bought her a drink ). So I say it's fine and we agree that we meet eachother afterwards for about an hour to chill together. So I am done with my business with my friend, we drive home quickly, at my request, 'cus I promised I would meet her (I tend to be a stand-up guy who keeps his promises). Before I leave, she asks me: do you miss me with a shy smiley. I reply: if you have to ask, you have forgotten our evening together in the park. So I call her on my way home, but she has a shitty phone (I can't really hear her), so I tell her I call her later when it's more silent and i'm out of the car for our meet-up. So when I get home I call her , but her phone is off, I think it's dead but then about 3 hours later she texts me: i think it's better we are friends, we are moving too fast, and I just came out of a tough relationship. So, I text her back: well, had fun with that dude huh? time to dump me out of the loop? She was like: you are just not my type, really tried, but you are not. I do not get how someone can go from do you miss me? to you're not my type. Something major happened between those both moments. My guess: she prob met the guy and made out with him or some shit and did not want to fuck with my mind, she liked him a bit more cus he was wearing a bigger chain than me ( a freaking fake one), and he was a bit more muscular -- he was driving a bycicle to meet her.... I have a fucking car.... She then continues on by saying I kinda like bad boys. But I am sitting here, thinking: nawh, you do not like bad boys, you like hopeless cases that you can't save so you can feed on the drama. (she already thinks of someone who snorts cocaine as a bad boy).So I tried to keep it cool between us as friends, because her parents know my family personally, I was not in the situation to tell her to fuck off. We have some fun in a chat and asks me to come with her to a bar. And I reply: so I can see you make out with that dude? Nty, maybe when I put some distance between the thought of you and me happening.I think we are fine, but then she continues to talk to my brother (when he asked what happened), saying I am clingy and possessive. I don't know how it is with you people, but my parents taught me to look out for a girl in a bar, so that nobody grabs her ass as she is with you (drunk folk)-- it is shameful towards her and more shameful if you do not act upon it as a man as she is with you at that moment. But at the same time, I am clingy? She made no effort into introducing me to her friends, so she was the only person I could talk to, and she always texts me every 10min: what are you doing, at the moment? Oh, also, she said I was the one who kept texting HER, but out of like 40 conversations, she was the one who started about 38 of them. So, tonight, not feeling well about this all, I texted her asking why she said that to my bro, and she replies cba with drama, so I try to remain nice and say we call it the past and she is like ''oké'' in the most interested way ever, as if I am the one who is begging to have her attention in life. Maybe I misplaced myself after not dating steadily for over a year and really trying to make this work, but I do not deserve that shit (I am far too good looking and loving for that). so I tell her: you know what: I think it's best if I just delete your number and we never talk to each other again, okay? I honestly wish you the best and hope you find a boyfriend who doesn't sniff cocaine. I am a loving guy when it comes to women, if it’s a one-night or a relationship, I adore women – can’t help it, but when I draw the line I’m hard on myself and cut all possible ties, in order for me to steer clear from drunk texting and so on. She then rambles on a bit about it being weird of me and stuff, but I was genuinely hurt. She also said you fell in love so quickly, as if she was thriving on it? Weird. But I kept telling her I liked you at this point, nothing more, because my love is serious. So I actually delete her number and she sent another text, but I ignored it. I feel like she is a dramaqueen, who just wanted me as a way to kill her time, while she hangs with lowlifes. And it makes me feel bad, for two reasons: I am not used to being used (Honestly, I have always been the guy who used others) And secondly, I really liked her, I really thought I could make something work with her, but it was far to fucked up for me to handle.Her list of reasons why I am not her type: I am 5,7 (I am about 2 inches taller than her), I was chubby (lost my entire fat belly with rigorous training in between our dates – at least I can thank her for that), I do not wear caps (because they fuck with your har and I wanna keep my hairline till my late 60s, and because she is into bad boys. And I’ll be honest about that last point, In the past I did my fair share of things that the type of boys she is interested in does not compare to. Maybe I was simply more mature than her and stood above that whole bad boy attitude, I do not know. I kind of feel empty now, and I really do not understand why, because I know she is not good for me. Maybe it’s ‘cus I’ve been denied for the first time in my life, who knows? Maybe I genuinely loved her. I am a sucker for love. But instead of sitting around, as I would do in my depression, I feel motivated to keep working out and working on myself as a person, for a girl like her is not worth any of my love, patience, time or money. She even dared to talk shit about my car (a van I use for my shop), while all the dudes she ever dated took the bus….Can anyone tell me if I made the right decision in this case? At this point I’m seeing it as a valuable refreshment at dating after a break of a year. Trying to look on the bright side, instead of being a depressed downer! Do not get me wrong, I used to be fit and got fit birds even when I was unfit by proper talking, but this one was just spinning my mind all the ways, having no clue what I should do. Hoping to hear from anyone, love. P.S. Sorry if the grammar is bad, wrote it at like 4 AM, and English isn’t my native tongue. via /r/dating_advice