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#I do try which is why I like to give people a chance. sometimes it works out
sufferu · 18 hours
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I like to think that, in Sloth:IF, Julius and Subaru eventually end up being friends.
Subaru is literally living with Anastasia’s dad, and I doubt she’d just — never talk to him again. So like, if she were to visit Halibel one day with her knight as her attendant, maybe after the Royal Selection ends, they’d have a very strong chance of meeting each other again. And that would be a hell of a shock for all parties involved lmao—
Subaru, greeted with a ghost from the literal worst week of his life, which he has been trying very hard to repress: You’re here?!
Julius, literally seeing a ghost, because he thought Subaru died to the Witch Cult alongside everyone else in the Mather’s Estate: You’re ALIVE?!
It probably wouldn’t go great at first. Maybe Subaru would automatically just — leave, make an excuse about taking up more shifts at work, and try not to look like he’s running away, but that’s exactly what he’s doing. He probably wouldn’t pick a fight, he gave up on that a long time ago. Maybe Julius would try to give him his space, because yeah, if their roles were swapped, he wouldn’t want a reminder of a week like that either. Or maybe after a while he’d decide that him terrorizing Subaru by basically chasing him around town via accidentally showing up where he tends to be is simply unsustainable, or at the very least entirely unfair, and eventually manages to get him to sit down and talk for a while.
They probably don’t Actually work everything out. Maybe Subaru refuses to acknowledge the lingering resentment he feels about something he knows was basically all his fault, fails to tell him that he’s still angry with him like he does when he sees him again in canon Arc 3, and Julius doesn’t know how to get him to acknowledge something like that. But they can make do.
There are probably a lot of things they don’t talk about. Not the duel, or Julius being a knight, or the massacre that chased Subaru all the way to Kararagi in the first place. They don’t talk about how Subaru looks at Julius sometimes, either. But there are other things they can discuss, especially as they start seeing one another more often. Rem is a good cook, and Subaru likes to show her off. Anastasia and Halibel’s dynamic is fun to watch, because seeing Anastasia act like a daughter and Halibel like a father feels so unnatural and peculiar that they may as well be seeing two entirely different people. Julius thinks Rigel is growing up to be so much like his father it hurts.
(In truly spectacular typical Julius fashion, Julius makes a sly joke about how he hopes he doesn’t need to repeat history with Rigel. It’s one of the only times he ever brings up their duel, and Subaru’s reaction to his comment is a large part of the reason why.)
Julius is older, but Subaru dies first. He makes a joke on his deathbed about finally managing to beat him at something. Julius finds it much less funny than he feels he ought to.
—Subaru wakes up some fifty, sixty years earlier, a teenager all over again, his son and daughter and grandchildren all lost to time, and it shatters him.
(When he sees Julius again, they don’t beat around the bush this time around. Subaru had fifty, sixty years too much of that.)
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theswedishpajas · 7 months
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The man truly can’t take a genuine compliment 🙄
#my art stuff#digital art#baldur's gate 3#bg3#astarion#astarion ancunin#this is part of a series I like to call “I’m never settling on a singular detailed artstyle”#I have no consistency in drawing realistic people/characters other than my shapy cartoon style#but I truly don’t get enough opportunity to properly shade anything with art in that style-!!! it always looks weird to me-!!!!!#I think some rude lil worm in my brain is wriggling around telling me it’s a futile attempt at still doing realism#cus I’m one of those “gifted” artists that grew up promising his parents he’ll end up among the big names or whatever#constantly training to become better at art but with realism oil paintings as the goal#you know how it is 😔#I wanna shade my lil funky designs but they never feel good enough to really put energy into or whatever so I compromise with stuff -#- like this where I try to draw characters more accurately while still stylizing them and shading them however I feel like it#which is great and all but I should really learn to give my more relaxed and less perfectionist art a chance#I deserve to enjoy the process and the result without working myself dead#it’s so much easier and rewarding to copy cartoon styles - stylizing realism makes me too anxious of doing it “wrong”#at least cartoon styles give me a goal to reach or a reference to strive towards#man I really should just cut myself some slack altogether#either way - this man is a flustered mess and he’s embarrassed about being called adorable in public or something#being teased in an affectionate way about his sweeter side and stuff#don’t ask why he’s shirtless - anatomy is just a lot more fun for me to draw sometimes#tasteful nudity and all that is extremely gorgeous to me#i need to practice anatomy more cus I just kinda did some shit and went with it this time with a BIT of consideration for muscle structure
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wild-moss-art · 8 months
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I’ve been dating and I try not to dress my absolute best for meetups bc I don’t like to be held to that standard but it’s so difficult bc I slay too hard in everything I wear 😔
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muninnhuginn · 1 year
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having to make myself just pull back a second and go for "simplest explanation that fits all the facts and isn't accidentally inferring beyond the facts we do have".
#I tend to not want to eliminate possibilities so long as there's even a small chance of them happening and I get why#but at the same time I've ended up doubting things that I think in retrospect I should have taken at face value.#so being sus of ltx beyond the point at which it was clear she wasn't some secret mastermind and wondering if chen bin was even possessed.#and I've ended up making assumptions without realising we're not actually shown it (re: presuming photo possession allowed control)#I think it's mainly just frustrating because in retrospect I can see the clues all lining up. it's not that it wasn't fair play.#the pieces were all there.#link click#link click spoilers#(for the tags :V)#And I'll be honest. Usually I just keep theorising to myself unless I'm super certain or enough other people think similarly#because sometimes I'm on point and can't explain why and other times I trust hunches and don't realise that's what I'm doing so get confuse#when suddenly a piece of media seems to 'contradict' itself. when it's actually just contradicting what I thought I'd inferred#just. taking a step back and trying to apply the simplest explanation that fits. applying common sense as to what fits within genre etc.#I feel really weird about meta-gaming theorising using stuff like current pacing etc but at the same time it's still data that's available#and as long as it's not stuff like idk an interview giving it all away I don't think it's necessarily 'cheating'?#(may delete later idk)
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would love your opinion of the newest episode of DW, if you get the chance.
HAHAHAHA YES I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS
Alright okay so
I only have one complaint, which is that that wasn't a faerie ring. You could still have the shamble, no problem, but it should have been over the top of an actual faerie ring, which should be a mushroom (or, at a push, stone) circle. Not some cotton that would blow clean off the cliff edge in three minutes.
HOWEVER
This is the first time I've seen Doctor Who do a time travel story using, not Doctor Who time travel lore and rules, but Welsh faerie rules. (First time I've seen anything do it, in fact.) In Welsh myth, people who enter faerie rings or get entranced by the music become suspended in time, out of sync with the real world. They think they danced for a night, but when they return it's been 100 years, and they crumble to dust as soon as they eat/drink/step on land/etc.
In this case, this is what I think happened to Ruby. She spent that time in Annwfn, seeing what would happen if the binding on the ring was broken. When she 'dies', she returns to the spot and lasts long enough to give her younger self the warning, then crumbles to dust.
But, a time travelling Ruby is not the woman who follows her throughout the episode. That, in fact, is a gwyll.
The gwyllion were hag faeries, usually of mountain tops (though Pembrokeshire's liminal cliffs are 100% from Welsh mythology - it was said that if you found a faerie ring on one but only put one foot in, you could see the faerie islands in the sea. And that faeries used to visit the human markets in Pembrokeshire and Ceredigion. So while gwyllion are unusual there, it's not an impossible relocation.) They were malicious and sometimes vicious faeries who delighted in making people lose their way, could strike an uncontrollable and ungodly terror into travellers, and who feature in more that one myth as an old woman that someone tried to approach, but they always appeared at the same distance away, impossible to catch up.
CAN YOU SEE THE PARALLELS
And the best part!! Is that this is why she defeats UNIT!!!
Kate tells Ruby that her agents have necklaces of silver and salt to keep out the supernatural, but that's just generic fairytale shit. That doesn't work on gwyllion. Salt drawn in a line would provide a barrier, but the UNIT soldiers aren't trying to trap or block the gwyll; they're trying to capture her. What works, very specifically, is a knife. Iron or steel for preference of course, but it needs to be a knife.
But UNIT has no Welsh employees and the soldiers have guns, not knives. And so they all become entranced.
(This is also what I think the gwyll 'says' to everyone to turn them against Ruby. She doesn't say anything - she sings.)
This is also the first time I've ever encountered any mainstream media doing Welsh faeries and understanding the tone to strike, which is 'unknowable, unstoppable and fucking terrifying'. I think I've only ever read it in Catharine Fisher books, and she's a Welsh author so... yeah, obviously. But I basically vibrated with delight and excitement for the entire episode.
Oh my god, hang on, Roger ap Gwilliam! Okay, I have two theories about him.
My weaker theory and the one I don't like is the kind of boring and obvious one, which is that he is himself not human. A lot of Welsh folklore features the devil, and I get that vibe from his role in the story. But, I'm not keen, because I can't see the link to the gwyll.
But my strongest theory, and the one I have chosen to believe, is that he's a human who made a deal with the Fae for power, and then reneged. There's a Metric Fuckton of stories about humans fucking up Fae gifts in some way, and the punishment is usually something ironic but always results in the loss of the gift. It could be a faerie harp that makes everyone dance, and the Fae tell the giftee not to abuse it, but they cruelly force everyone to dance so long and so hard that the faerie returns, takes back the harp, and then takes the human's ability to ever make music again, so example (by taking fingers or eyes or tongues as well, often.)
So I think Mad Jack strikes a bargain for power - but, then tries to abuse that power (nuclear war). But part of the bargain is that the Fae cannot approach him directly ever again. In the real world, they therefore tempt him into the faerie ring and bind his soul there, problem solved - until the Doctor accidentally lets him out, and gets his own soul stuck. Ruby, therefore, becomes the instrument through which they manage to take that power away once again - and then, her final Fae gift for her service is that they use the temporal anomaly of the faerie ring to send her back, at the end of her life, and give her a second chance. This time, with Mad Jack's soul left bound in Annwfn.
The fun part is, RTD is a writer who understands the power of not explaining everything and leaving some things up to the viewer's imagination, so none of this is ever going to be explained lol. But yeah, that is a gwyll. The moment she appeared, I said out loud "Oh holy fuck, gwyllion." That was a gwyll.
As a final observation, I loved seeing Siân Phillips, and I choose to believe they filmed those scenes in a pub because they could only get Siân if they agreed to just come to her local. The woman is a queen.
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a-hazbin-reader · 7 months
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Can you do an Alastor x fem!reader where Alastor confesses his love to her, but she doesn't believe him, thinking it's some kind of sick joke? She just laughs nervously, saying something like “yeah, yeah, I got it, very good joke, Al, your humor is getting better,” expecting that it will actually turn out to be some kind of prank
However, Alastor doesn't stop and tries to convey to her that he really loves her, but she still doesn't believe him because she doesn't trust him completely. Like, he's the radio demon, one of the most dangerous and powerful overlords who seemingly despised the idea of ​​getting close to someone, what if he just wants to trick her so he can maybe make a deal with her or something?? That's why at first she tries to avoid him in order to get rid of this awkwardness due to his confessions, but gradually in the end she begins to meet him halfway and considers the idea of ​​​​starting to date him after all. Not official yet, but the chances are great
WELP-
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
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TW: None?? I think??
Description: ☝️⬆️
You're used to expecting the worst-case scenario and protecting your heart first and foremost, it's just how you learned to survive
You've learned not to trust anyone, especially anybody down here in hell with you, everyone has an ulterior motive
Yet...by some weird twist of fate you found yourself a home at the hotel, Charlie somehow having convinced you to stay
Whether or not you believed in redemption, you couldn't deny that you didn't feel a sense of closeness with everyone there
Even Alastor was nice to hang around sometimes, though you didn't trust him in the slightest
How could you? The Radio Demon?? He's got plans for his plans and only sees people for their use, he doesn't care about anyone, especially not you
You're just amusing to him, which is fine, you can tolerate being amusing just not being used
You had a comfortable relationship with the overlord which was something that not many people could say
You two got along well enough, spent a good amount of time together and actually had decent conversations
He'a charming and handsome, a dangerous combination but you were far too addicted to his presence now to worry about it, you can still protect your heart
Or at least you did, until Alastor decided to toy with your feelings, how he found out about your budding crush was beyond you
You two were walking alone together at night, laughing at some couple you two had witnessed earlier, teasing them
"I just don't understand how any man could be that whipped for a woman! I can't wrap my head around it..!"
Instead of joining in your laughter, he hummed and looked over at you strangely before looking ahead
"Oh, I don't know... I find myself understanding men like that a little more these days."
It's like a bucket of ice water just fell on you, your laughter cutting off as you look at him in confusion
"What do you mean? Are you...seeing someone or something?"
He looks as uncomfortable as a man with a permanent smile can be, tapping his claws against his staff
"Heavens no, but that doesn't mean there isn't someone special in my life... someone I wouldn't mind courting."
He gives you a meaningful glance then looks away again, stopping suddenly and facing you
"Alastor-"
"I wouldn't mind being whipped for you."
Your stomach sours and you frown, pushing at his shoulder a little harder than you meant to
"Yeah, that's real funny, Alastor. Why don't you go try that joke on someone else next time?"
You walk off as quickly as you can, leaving a baffled looking Alastor in your dust
Do you have any idea how hard it was for him to confess!? He grits his teeth and rubs his hand over his face as he watches you run away from him
You don't talk to him the next day, or the day after that, in fact... Alastor is pretty sure you're avoiding him because any time he tries to talk to you-
You find an excuse to run off, your relationship with him awkward and nervously hanging on by a thread
He ruined it and all your walls came right back up
You should've known he would exploit your weakness like that, should've seen that he was only being so good to you because he wanted to use everything he learned against you
You don't know what he gets out of it or what his goal is, but you're sure he's got an angle
Even now, he's trying to mess with your feelings, bringing you flowers, pushing little notes under your door, one time he even tried to serenade you
He keeps trying to tell you that he cares about you, that he feels for you, that he wants you, and you just don't want to hear it
It hurts to be toyed with
Everyone else at the hotel can see what's happening between you two which makes everything that much more embarrassing
"Come on, Husk! I know you know something! Why is he targeting me!? What do I have that he wants?"
Husk looks visibly uncomfortable, looking over your body before looking away, suddenly interested in a smudge on a glass
"I don't know anything so quit asking me! Why don't you just sit down and talk with him, huh?"
Oh, he knows something
Angel smirks and nudges your leg with his own, invading your personal space to further tease you
"You're tellin' me that you ain't flattered by all this attention he's givin' you? I've seen the way he's been mooning over you lately, and let me tell you~ That shit ain't fake~"
You huff and shake your head, mostly to hide the blush on your face from them
"He has an angle, everyone always does."
"Look if you wanna be a blind bitch then be my guest but at least promise me you'll hit that and tell me the details~?"
"ANGEL!"
You can't avoid Alastor forever no matter how hard you try, eventually running into him late one night when everyone else is in bed
You should've known better than to get that late night snack, but you had skipped dinner earlier, and you were hungry
You're washing your plate off when you hear Alastor walk in, stiffening once you realize you have no real excuse to run away anymore
"Alastor-"
He sucks in a breath and stays still as if scared he'll chase you away, which he might actually be worried about due to your actions lately
"I know you think I confessed to you in order to get something from you but that's far from the truth. I do genuinely find myself attached to you."
You feel your lip wobble a little, hugging yourself as you look away from him
"Don't. Don't you dare mess with me like this or I'll never forgive you, Alastor."
He takes another step closer to you, cautious as if trying not to scare you away
"I'm being entirely honest with you, I've fallen for you in ways I can't even begin to understand or convey to you. These last few weeks have been torture for me."
He's gripping your arms gently to stop you from turning away, the simple touch spreading warmth throughout your body
You have missed him a lot...
"I'm not asking that you confess your love to me, I only want a chance to show you I'm being genuine with you..."
You glance up at him before taking a step back, blushing furiously at the pathetic puppy eyes he's giving you
You can't believe you're going to agree to this, he better not make you regret it later or you'll make him suffer for it
You sigh and point at him, doing your best to remain calm and not let your emotions show
"I'll think about it, okay? Just...give me time to think."
He visibly relaxes and sighs in relief, giving you a warm smile as if you had just said yes
"That's more than I could ask for, I'll wait hundreds of years for you if that's what you want."
You blush more and have to cover your mouth to stop an excited squeal from escaping your lips
"Q-quit flirting with me! I already said I'd think about it..!"
He chuckles softly and reaches out to rub your cheek before pulling away and turning to leave
"Okay okay~ I'll wait for you...~"
He leaves you there in the dark, blushing and fuming to yourself
Having a handsome overlord on your arm wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen to you
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I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!!
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iwanthermidnightz · 1 year
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When I think back on the Speak Now album, I get a lump in my throat. I have a feeling it will always be that way, because this period of time was so vibrantly aglow with the last light of the setting sun of my childhood. I made this album, completely self-written, between the ages of 18 and 20. I've spoken about how I feel like those ages are the most emotionally turbulent ones in a persons life. Maybe when I say that, I'm really just talking about myself.
I think they might just be the most idealistic, hopeful years too. At this point in my life, I had released my second album, Fearless. It became the breakthrough moment I'd always dreamt of, one that catapulted my career to new realms of success. It had brought with it a tidal wave of pressures and pitfalls and growing pains. All the while, I was encountering the milestones and checkpoints of normal teenage growth. I had cataclysmic crushes and brushes with heartache. I moved out of my parents' house and set my bags down in a new apartment. I hung photos on my own walls and decorated the space where I would sob and cackle and shatter and dream. Sometimes I felt like a grown up, but a lot of the time I just wanted to time travel back to my childhood bed, where my mom would read stories to me until I fell asleep.
In my darker moments, I was tormented by the doubt that swirled loudly around my ascent and my merits as an artist. I was trying to create a follow up to the most awarded country album in history, while staring directly into the face of intense criticism. I had been widely and publicly slammed for my singing voice and was first encountering the infuriating question that is unfortunately still lobbed at me to this day: does she really write her songs? Spoiler alert: I really, really do.
In the years since, I've developed a thicker skin about public criticism and the cynicism with which some people approach the music I make. At that time, it leveled me. I had these voices in my head telling me that I had the perfect chance and I blew it. I hadn’t been good enough. I had given it all I had and been found wanting.
I wanted to get better, to challenge myself, and to build on my skills as a writer, an artist, and a performer. I didn't want to just be handed respect and acceptance in my field. I wanted to earn it. To try and confront these demons, I underwent extensive vocal training and made a decision that would completely define this album: I decided I would write it entirely on my own. I figured, they couldn't give all the credit to my cowriters if there weren't any. But that posed a new challenge: It really had to be good. If it wasn't, I would be proving my critics right.
I had no idea how much this pain would shape me. That this was the beginning of my series of creative choices made by reacting to setbacks with defiance. That my stubbornness in the face of doubters and dissenters would become my coping mechanism through my entire career from that point forward. This exact pattern of enacting my own form of rebellion when I feel broken is exactly why you're reading these very words, and I'm re-releasing this album now.
I went through my first worldwide scandal (the mic grab seen around the world). I experienced the weirdness of trying to get to know a boy while a swarm of paparazzi surrounds the car. Media contacting my publicist for an official statement on why two teenagers broke up. These are weird experiences to have at any age, but even more surreal when you're 19.
I had the nagging sense that in the most intense moments of my life, I had frozen. I had said nothing publicly. I still don't know if it was out of instinct, not wanting to seem impolite, or just overwhelming fear. But I made sure to say it all in these songs. I decided to call the album Speak Now. It was a play on the speak now or forever hold your peace' moment in weddings, but for me it symbolized a chance to respond to the chatter and commentary around my own life.
Some of these emotional revelations were surprising to people. Some expected anger and instead got compassion and empathy with 'Innocent'. Some expected a kiss-off breakup song but instead got a hand-on-heart apology, 'Back to December. It was an album that was the most precious to me because of its vast extremes. It was unfiltered and potent. In my mind, the saddest song I've ever written is 'Last Kiss'. My most scathing is 'Dear John' and my most wistfully romantic is 'Enchanted'.
I'll be forever proud of setting a goal and seeing it through. I'lI always feel shivers all over when I remember singing 'Long Live' to close the show every night on tour. The outstretched hands of those bright and beautiful faces of the fans. Their support was like an open palm that reached out and helped me up off the ground when others were, frankly, mean.
These days I make my choices for those people, the ones who thought I had been good enough all along. I try to speak my mind when I feel strongly, in the moment I feel it. I'm still idealistic and earnest about the music I make, but I'm less crushed when people mock me for it. I know now that one of the bravest things a person can do is create something with unblinking sincerity, to put it all on the line. I still sometimes wish I was a little kid again in a tiny bed, before I ever grew up.
I always looked at this album as my album, and the lump in my throat expands to a quivering voice as I say this. Thanks to you, dear reader, it finally will be.
I consider this music to be, along with your faith in me, the best thing that's ever been mine.
Yours,
Taylor
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princessbrunette · 1 year
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kinktober : oct 3rd
simon riley x teasing / bratting
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winding simon up was so much fun.
it really gets your heart racing after a slow week, you know? sometimes, you were restless and antsy — and you needed your giant, strong man to threaten you a little to feel something.
so, you’d pretty much been slutting yourself out to him around the base.
it was unlike you, his demure thing that respected privacy and boundaries as much as he did. but, occasionally — you both liked the thrill. which is why you had taken the chance to be extra chatty and sweet with his men, brushing it off as “i’m a nurse, si. you expect me not to speak to people now?” however, it wasn’t just that. it was the tight outfits, the dropping things on the floor just to bend over right in front of him before he goes off on duty — and worst of all, when he’d give you little to no reaction, the touching.
you’d spot him near the dining hall, a quiet night on the base. he was stood, arms crossed after training some newer recruits and he just looked so fucking big. he wore a long sleeve black thermal shirt, stretched across thick muscle, and black cargo pants, the thick belt accentuating his waist. he had his usual black balaclava on, and his boots added an inch or so onto his already imposing height. you felt yourself fucking clench, and for no reason other than he looked good.
you skip over, all bouncy and smiles and he has to fight not to let a smile slip himself — his eyes softening.
“si!” you smile softly, approaching and he turns his body towards you. simon always gave you his full attention.
“you alright, love?” he gruffs in that low voice, and you can barely contain the horny and dumb expression from sliding across your features, blinking up at him with large doe eyes as you suck on your bottom lip. tease, he thinks.
“missed you, been neglecting me.” you groan, and he can tell by your voice that you don’t really feel any kind of way about it. there’s something bigger at play here and he knows it already.
“was trainin’ the rookies.” his eyes don’t leave yours as you step closer, tits brushing against his stomach.
“mhm? how was it?” you converse sweetly, barely glancing around to see if there were any wandering eyes before reaching down to his belt, playfully tugging at it before your hand wanders lower, feeling his heavy shape under your palm. he harshly grabs your wrist, pinning it in the air as he stares you down, voice dropping an octave.
“you think that’s wise, nurse? doin’ that right here?” nurse. he always calls you that when you’d been bad. bingo.
his intimidating glare makes you falter for just a second, ripping your eyes away to recoup but when you do he moves his head to follow your gaze, stepping forward so you’re backed up against the wall.
“don’t know what you’re talking about.” you try, but it doesn’t come out as confident.
“no? reckon you’ve been behaving this week, then?” he pushes, muscles tight with frustration. he’d been waiting for the chance to pounce, and you’d barely even pushed his button. you hold your chin up, putting on the act.
“i have. i’m a good girl.” you tease and he scoffs, eyes darting about the hallway before grabbing you roughly by the waistband and stuffing his thick arm down there, strong hand pushing past your panties. you let out a quiet yelp when he slides his fingers through slick, tutting at you and pulling his hand out.
“as i thought. all wet over nothing.” he berates, opening your jaw with one hand and stuffing his wet fingers into your mouth with the other. your eyes water as they stare up at him mercilessly, threatening to roll back when you choke on them just a little. you’re saved by the sound of footsteps and he pulls back, a string of saliva following his hand when it departs and snapping against your chin, making you splutter a little, wiping it with the back of your hand.
you think he might let you run off, now that there’s people around but he grasps you by the back of the neck when you turn around, practically walking you like a dog in the direction of your dorm. “c’mon, know you’re fuckin’ dyin’ for it. walk that sorry little arse all the way to your room.” his voice is a mere growl now and all you can do is silently nod, cunt clenching around nothing.
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moonlit-imagines · 4 months
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Headcanons for being an Avenger with a low social battery
Avengers x reader
warnings:
a/n:
prompt: anonymous: “Can I have the avengers with a reader who has a really bad social battery. Like they can be out in public and then they just disappear and are like “nah I’m done with these mofo’s””
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the avengers are quite the rowdy bunch
but you always as excitable as them
these guys were often in the public eye, always being asked all sorts of questions
but you just couldnt handle it a lot of the time
"y/n, can i get a picture with you? you're my hero!" -fan
"uh...yeah, sure. big smile!" -you, completely exhausted
you tried to be nice and not obvious that you were drained but boy was it hard
especially when tony threw his parties
you'd typically sit in the corner with a drink and try to make it through the night
but there were always some guests who were just dying to come talk to you
"hey! why are you hiding over here, there's a party going on! come, have some fun!" -clueless party guest
"oh, i'm okay over here, thank you" -you
"i'll keep you some company, then. why don't you tell me a story of one of your avenger missions"
some people just could not take the hint
but the avengers usually knew when you'd had enough
"wanna get out of here?" -nat
"please." -you
you'd recharge alone whenever you escaped the madness
dont even get me started on the news
they would do anything to get an interview with you
"y/n! could you comment on the recent events in [country] that you accompanied the avengers in?" -reporter
"we were there, we saved the day" -you, obviously exhausted
"is that all you have to say?" -reporter
"hey! don't you want to hear what i have to say? huh?" -tony
"thanks, tony" -you
"no problem, kiddo" -tony
wanda got it
you liked spending time with her because she liked to be calm and alone sometimes too
you'd read or watch tv or listen to music together in silence for hours
it was nice
it was funny because sometimes the team would all be socializing and then bam
"hey, where's y/n?" -steve
"i think they tapped out" -clint
"oh. i'll go check on them" -steve
"no, just leave them alone, they'll be back" -tony
after a lot of missions you'd just wait for the avengers on the quinjet while they spoke to authorities or SHIELD or whoever
"just forward me the mission report, i'll fill it out" -you
everyone just kinda let you do your thing
which worked out just fine for you
it drove fury crazy back in the day
"just why are we giving y/n special treatment? what? they're tired?" -fury
"i didn't say that, i said they were over your shit" -tony
"you better not have said that, i'll give you one last chance" -fury
and that is just another reason you were depleted
some days were better than others, and sometimes you could keep up! but once your battery died, that was it
"'social battery,' you say? any way i could be of assistance? maybe a small jolt from mjolnir to charge it back up?" -thor
"oh, no, just a figure of speech, no need for...that" -you
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @johnmurphyisqueer // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @canarypoint // @procrastinatingsapphictrash // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @petersgroupie // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @bad4amficideas // @sheridans-dynamos // @simsrecs // @prettysbliss // @skdkdkckfk // @simp-legend // @wild-rose-35 // @nekoannie-chan // @evilcr0ne // @v0idl1nq // @ruvaakke // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @amirahiddleston // @beth-gallagher22 // @brutal-out-here // @rqmanoff // @elenavampire21 // @mymelodymia // @pheonixfire777 // @deanzboyfriend //
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idkwhatever580 · 4 months
Text
Are you mad?
Masterlist
Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader
Prompt: Natasha is jealous and y/n is a bit sensitive. Y/n overthinks wayyyy too much.
Warnings: slightly toxic nat (in the middle), cheating accusations, cussing, lmk if there’s any I missed.
A/N: I have a good idea for this but idk if it’s gonna turn out. Lmk if you like it and my requests are open! Also she’s so pretty like pepper spray me pleeeeeeaaassseeeee
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/n’s pov
Another night full of loud noises and bright lights. This party had no significance. No birthday, no win, no nothing. But Tony Stark will always find something.
Even if it is nothing. He will use it.
So like I was saying, I’m sitting here at this party just wanting to go back to my room. But unfortunately I need to be here for publicity purposes.
I make it through most of the party with minimal effort. Not many people have the urge to talk to me aside from the occasional drunk person. But Bruce comes up to me and sits down with his drink.
Like me, bruce doesn’t really do big interactions and stuff.
Natasha on the other hand, is one of our most popular avengers and the most sought after. So she must deal with people all night. I don’t mind though. She has her fun. And I watch.
Bruce cuts into my thinking with a sigh and I look over at him and say
“Penny for your thoughts?”
He looks at me and shakes his head a bit.
I nod knowing sometimes people just don’t want to talk. But I still leave the offer open.
“Well, if you need to talk I’m here till Natasha gets drunk. Which, knowing her, won’t be for a while.”
He sighs again after a while and turns to me and says
“I like this girl”
I immediately perk up and say
“Ooh! What’s her name? Do I know her?”
He blushes and nods and says
“Who she is is not the problem I’m having”
And I nod my head and say
“Right… so… what is the problem?”
He thinks for a bit and says
“How do I know that she will want me even after she sees the other guy.”
I sigh and take a minute to think about it. That’s a tough one and I don’t want to say the wrong thing. After a second I decide to try a different approach.
“Why don’t you think she will like you?”
He gets a bit awkward and says
“Well, you’ve seen the other guy. You know how he is. How could anybody love a monster like me?”
I frown and say
“I don’t think you’re a monster”
He scoffs and brushes my comment aside and I tilt my head and I say
“Do you think I’m a monster?”
He looks at me and says
“No! No you’re not a monster!”
I nod my head and figure out where I’m going to go with it.
“Do you think Natasha, or Wanda, or the rest of the team are monsters?”
He shakes his head and once again says
“No! I’d never think that about you guys”
I give him a look and then say
“So what makes you think we would think of you any different? Or better yet, she”
He thinks and says
“Well- the other guy, he’s dangerous and scary. And he hurts people”
I nod my head for him to continue
“And I can’t control him.”
I nod my head and sigh. I think for a second while biting my cheek and I say
“Well. Like I was saying. We have all been dangerous and scary before. But that’s not what makes us us right?”
He nods his head and I continue
“And as for your worries about losing control, have you ever thought about the fact that you desensitize him?”
I reference hulk and he shakes his head
I nod mine and say
“Well, I think that maybe you are having a hard time controlling him because you’re constantly fighting with him, and you never really have given him the chance to be anything other than angry.”
He nods his head and says
“Yeah.”
I put my hand on his knee for reassurance and I say
“Bruce, if you take time to learn more about him and if you work with him instead of working against him, then maybe he’d be more willing to work with you as well. Maybe the switch between you and him would come easier even.”
He looks at me and says
“Well how would I do that?”
“Maybe give him a safe space. It sounds weird, but when I am feeling trapped and like I can’t breathe, I freak out and lash out on everyone. Maybe he does the same. Maybe if you give him a space where he doesn’t feel any pressure, then he might be able to work with you better”
He nods his head understanding and says
“Thank you y/n, you always have the best advice”
We hug each other and I say
“Now go get Dr. Cho.”
I smirk when he blushes and I say
“I knew you had a little crush the whole time. Sorry. I couldn’t help but let you have your moment though”
He laughs it off and gets up to go talk with her.
What I didn’t see happening during our conversation is Natasha.
I turn around to see her starring daggers into my soul. I walk over to her with a confused look and say
“Hey baby!”
She has a really tight grip on her drink so I softly take it from her and hand it to a random person who gladly takes it.
She grabs my hand and pulls me to an empty hallway and as she’s pulling me her grip on my wrist hurts and I say
“Ow! Baby you’re hurting me”
She grips tighter as if she doesn’t even hear me. Or maybe she does and just doesn’t care.
She only lets go when we’re in the hallway and I say
“What’s wrong?”
I rub my wrist which now has a growing red mark on it and she says
“What’s going on with you and Bruce?!”
I look at her confused and she says
“Huh? Are you just gonna sit there acting dumb or are you gonna answer me?!”
Her voice is laced with venom. And I say
“Baby I don’t know what you’re talking about”
She huffs and says
“You and Banner! You think I wouldn’t see how you were both giving each other googly eyes and how you put your hand on his knee?! And that hug! God that hug was so touchy!!”
I furrow my eyebrows and say
“Baby nothing is going on between us! He was asking for help about a crush. And I also talked to him about hulk”
She scoffs and says
“You’re lying to me. You’re such a fucking cheater!”
she goes to walk away but I say
“Wait! You don’t get to call me that and just walk away! I didn’t do anything baby”
I try to think on my toes since if I don’t act fast she’s leaving. So I do what my heart says to do.
I pull her into me for a kiss and she melts into it. Once I pull away I know she is calmed down a bit and I brush some stray hairs from her face and say
“Baby, I would never ever in a million years cheat on you. I’m sorry it looked like that but I can assure you I only have eyes for you. And he likes Cho anyways”
She sighs and mumbles
“You’re right. I don’t know what came over me. I’m sorry”
I nod my head and say
“We’ve still got a few hours before the party is over. We better get back out there before we get in trouble”
She nods her head and leaves promptly. I take a minute and let out a breath. She didn’t even say I love you to me. No kiss. No nothing. Just left.
I look down and my now slightly raw wrist. I sigh and roll my eyes knowing that I have to cover this up before going back so I run to my room and use my makeup skills to cover it up and for good measure I put on a few bracelets. Then I head back down to the stupid party.
I sit in a corner hiding from everyone even more than before. And I think about Natasha. I immediately get lost in my thoughts.
Did it really look like I was cheating? Maybe it did. Maybe I was cheating. I mean. That hand on his knee was weird I guess. I thought I was comforting him though. Oh my god. I was cheating on Natasha! She had every right to be mad at me. God I’m such a bad girlfriend. She should have broken up with me!
“Y/n?”
I snap back into reality when Wanda waves her hand in my face.
She looks worried. I furrow my eyebrows when I feel hot liquid running down my cheeks.
I reach up to touch it and realize I’m crying. I softly look back up at Wanda and then before she can say anything I bolt.
I run to my old room. I don’t stay here anymore since I’ve moved into Natasha’s room.
But there’s still some essential things in there in case someone needs a place to stay.
That someone is apparently me now.
I can’t go back to Natasha. I can’t face her. I’m a fucking cheater. She hates me. That’s why she didn’t say she loves me when she left.
She must not have known how to break up with me. So she just walked away and that’s how she broke up with me.
I snap back out of my thoughts once again and I get in my pajamas and in my bed. It’s not comfortable at all.
I’m only comfy when Natasha is with me. When her warm touch combats my cold one.
Guess Im never gonna be comfortable again. She is leaving me.
A soft knock comes from my door about an hour later. I check the time and see that the party is probably over by now.
I don’t answer but they come in anyways.
“Y/n?”
I look over and see Wanda and she immediately comes over to me and envelopes me in a hug.
“What’s wrong sestra?”
I shrug my shoulders and she says
“Don’t shut me out. Please. It’ll only make whatever is happening worse. Please talk to me”
I sigh knowing she’s right and I try to find the right words but I can’t so I just blurt out
“I cheated on Natasha!”
Her eyes widen in shock but she quickly recovers the best she can and tries to assess the situation before making assumptions.
“Okay. Um. What happened? With who?”
I look down and say
“With Bruce”
She furrows her eyebrows and says
“I thought you were only interested in girls?”
I nod my head and tears are falling but I don’t let them affect me
“I am! I’m only interested in Natasha!”
She is confused and she says
“Okay then how did you cheat on her?”
“Well. During the party Bruce came to me about his crush on Dr. Cho, and I ended up talking with him about her and the hulk. I tried to be comforting for him and I put my hand on his knee. Then we hugged and I went to Natasha and she pulled me out and yelled at me and got all sideways. Then when I tried to clear it up she agreed with it and dropped it but when she left back to the party she didn’t kiss me or say I love you to me or anything! So she just didn’t know how to break up with me for cheating on her!”
Wanda listens to my rant but before I can go any further she stops me and says
“Y/n you did not cheat on Natasha. Sure she might be a bit salty but you didn’t do anything wrong okay?”
I sniffle and nod my head and say
“But she still doesn’t want me”
Wanda shakes her head and says
“No. That’s not true. She loves you. You just need to talk to her about it okay? I’m sure she is missing you right now”
Right as Wanda says that, we hear another knock from the door. And in comes Natasha.
“Y/n? Are you in here?”
She says softly and then sees us together and says
“Oh. Hey.. Are you alright?”
I sniff and nod my head still thinking she is mad at me and Wanda gets up to leave. I try to make her stay but she whispers softly that I need to talk to nat about it.
Wanda goes to nat and says
“Listen and talk okay?”
Nat nods her head and immediately after Wanda steps out she rushes to me and says
“What’s wrong baby?”
I sniffle again. Damn snot. Then I whimper out.
“Are you mad at me?”
She furrows her eyebrows and says
“Why would I be mad at you baby?”
I shrugged my shoulders shutting down a bit but Natasha knows this all too well.
“Baby don’t shut me out. Tell me please”
I sigh once again and say
“You were so mad when you said I cheated on you.”
She shakes her head a bit and says
“No. I was not thinking straight. I let jealousy overtake my reasoning and I blew up at you. It was wrong of me.”
I look up at her and say
“So you’re not leaving me?”
She laughs a bit and says
“You didn’t think you could get rid of me that easily did you?”
I giggle a bit from her laughter and I shrug my shoulders saying
“I dunno.”
She pulls me into a tight hug and whispers in my ear
“Baby. I am not breaking up with you. Not now not ever.”
I sigh at her reassurance and nod my head. Then I yawn and she says
“You wanna head back to our room?”
I nod my head and say
“Can we cuddle?”
She frowns at me and immediately gets tense and says
“No”
She starts walking away and I look at her in surprise and bow my head low and say
“Oh. Okay”
I trail behind her and she turns around and starts laughing and says
“Baby I was kidding. Of course we can cuddle”
I look at her and immediately get excited again. She holds her arms open for me and says
“Come here detka”
I run into her arms and hug her. Then she ends up picking me up and carrying me to our room.
She carries me to our room and since I’m already in my pajamas, she just plops me on the bed and gives me a kiss.
Then she trails her kisses down to my neck and I say
“Baby not tonight I’m tired”
She doesn’t listen and keeps kissing me. I go to say something and she suddenly blows a raspberry into my neck and makes me laugh and I say
“Stop! Stop! That tickles!!”
She giggles and pulls away and says
“Sorry. I had to”
I smile and hold my arms out for her to cuddle with me but she pulls away and I pout.
She smiles and says
“I have to get changed first baby. This dress is uncomfortable”
I nod my head and curl up in our sheets.
She comes back and snuggles up behind me. She decides to reassure me once again and says
“I’ll never leave you. Not in a million years.”
I smile and say
“I love you”
She kisses my shoulder and says
“I love you more”
I smirk and combat
“I love you most”
She giggles at our little battle and says
“I love you mostest”
I smirk and say
“I loved you first”
And she scoffs and shoved my shoulder a bit saying
“You can’t use that! It’s not fair!”
I smile at her and say
“Life’s not fair. Suck it up buttercup”
She smiles and kisses my lips and says
“Sleep detka. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow”
I smile and close my eyes softly.
“I love you”
I hear Natasha mumble into my neck and I squeeze the hand that’s wrapped around my waist a bit to say it back without words.
I love you too.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: man that took a while. I forgot about this one lol. Don’t forget I take requests!! Not gonna lie I was way too nice to Bruce in this one. I love me some good Bruce slander. So I might make a fic with Bruce slander lolololollll (it’s not the fact that I hate him. It’s the fact that he likes my girl)
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akirathedramaqueen · 3 months
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Some thoughts on the Western Energy trainwreck
Soo, I've come across that post, and... it made me thinking.
Stolas spent there the whole time, not knowing Blitzø *did*, in fact, send help. He assumed he was all alone, although still had some resemblance of hope, a fragile straw he hang on to piss off Striker, allowing to tear up only when one didn't look at him.
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And... hell, I used to see many comments about how Blitzø let him down there... But did he?
Oh course, some think he did, and he surely thinks he did, too. But, although the whole sequence with him and Loona trying to get that S.H.O.T. was a fucking circus and looked like a joke compared to suffers Stolas had to endure and barely survive...
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To be honest, these scenes being put together on surface do, in fact, make it think that the whole Stolas being on the verge of death ordeal is a joke to Blitzø and he would rather spend time running around with big needles and stuff.
If to get back to the phone convo between them at the beginning of the episode, Blitzø mentions that it took him 5 years to book that appointment, and it means a lot for him to not miss it. Missing out on that shot meant to put Loona in potential danger, his daughter, and, although we don't know what kind of shots they were talking about, we know for sure what does missing out on a vaccine schedule could mean in the real world - we tend to forget how dangerous polio, for instance, is, as most of us have access to the vaccine and don't get to experience it not even themselves, but in close vicinity as well. For us, vaccines might seem to be some kind of stupid routine, something we got comfortable with in a privileged world, something which surely could be skipped for a day, right? But in Blitzø's one they are luxury.
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Despite all of that, I also want to put your attention to the fact that he wasn't going to ignore it. He is speeding up, and I think (although it's not expressed explicitly, but not everything should be, right?), that he already made up his mind that Stolas is a priority.
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You are not thinking it's about shots, right? He wasn't that reckless in driving before *that* call.
And! He wasn't even the initiator of Millie and Moxxie going instead of him. *M&M's* were.
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And Blitzø trusts them, because why not? They are his employees, they are skilled and capable, and they are his friends as well, they know that shit is important to him (although he isn't willing to admit it himself).
We see also, how Stolas was admitted to the hospital immediately, which already gives a hint on how different their stance in the world is. I wonder sometimes how it would've turned out if Stolas proposed to Blitzø to use the royal influence to get another appointment shortly after Blitzø saves him, but we know he didn't get much time to even think about that. He wasn't even able to finish the sentence before Striker took his phone off him.
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To be honest, I don't think the outcome itself would have been much different. I don't think Blitzø would've done a better job at saving Stolas, but, maybe, only maybe, he would've felt better because he was, at least, there for him.
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Because you know that shit is going to haunt him till the day he dies. Because it only reassured him that he isn't capable of sticking around for his people.
Because, you know... happened once already.
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No wonder he left Stolas's message on "read". Knowing all things before and after, it's not a surprise that he, tending to take all of responsibility for all the wrongs on himself more than he should to, couldn't face the consequence of what he thinks he failed in. He, speaking figuratively, left Fizz on "read" for 15 years, and he kinda sorted it out only because he couldn't run anymore and had to face the trauma as circumstances didn't give him a chance to chicken out.
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I wonder what he was trying to tell Stolas. But I don't think we will ever get to learn that.
Aw, crap, I am done here, I am going to go and cry for a little bit. Thanks for coming to my ted talk, see ya in like 5 minutes to experience some Full Moon trauma again, because I can't get over these two. XD
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wolfiesmoon · 14 days
Text
When you suddenly cry in front of them :(
Riddle, Vil, Kalim, Malleus x gn!reader (riddle's and vil's are explicitly post overblot tho it's not super important)
i'm back to entering tartarus every day (school started again) so i thought i might as well distract myself with some hot twst guys :)
i havent been very active i know, i just cant get myself to do anything at all these days 😞i am so so sorry for making a kinda lazy short collection of blurbs but i need to get back into my writing groove somehow
(as a sidenote, i'm worried some of these might be ooc? i sincerely apologise if they are :( )
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RIDDLE honestly doesn't know what to do with himself. He never really got the comfort he needed whenever he cried as a child so he had no idea how to comfort you now. He scolds himself internally for not immediately acting and just kind of freezing up beside you so he panics and tries to recall of all the times he saw someone else comforting others in order to end the extremely awkward tension as quickly as possible. He pats your back somewhat rigidly and says "There, there." In an all too awkward manner. You're caught off guard so hard by the sheer akwardness of Riddle's comfort technique that you burst out laughing, troubling Riddle even further. "W...Why are you laughing now?" The dumbfounded expression on his face is the perfect medicine for forgetting your troubles just now. Riddle unintentionally just cheered you up. After the incident, he seemingly becomes less strict with you and starts asking about how you're doing umprompted, which always pleasantly surprises you. Sometimes, Trey even shows up at Ramshackle dorm, holding a tart of your favourite flavour and saying he got orders from Riddle to deliver it to you.
VIL drops his usual strict nature for a bit. Of all people, he would be the one who could tell you were constantly acting strong and unbothered by everything going on around you. He thought of it equal parts admirable as he did foolish. Such intense emotion is not something to keep bottled up inside you and you made him realise that. His expression is surprisingly soft as he places one arm on your back, gently stroking it. He talks you through your feelings with a big sense of maturity and care and you're suprised by just how much he cares for you and your feelings. You don't exactly get that same impression when he's scolding you for not sitting straight or not wearing your uniform properly... regardless, you're very thankful for his words, even the harsher ones about needing to tell someone about things like this. "Tell me, if you must. I will always listen." After the incident, nothing much changes, really. Atleast from the perspective of others. He still gets on your case for not wearing your uniform properly, but he also asks about how you're doing when he gets the chance and does not accept simply "fine" or "okay" for an answer. You simply must elaborate why that is.
KALIM enters big brother mode. He's comforted crying siblings for various reasons before so what makes you any different? He gives you a tight hug, gently rubbing your back and trying to cheer you up with comforting phrases. He'd also try making jokes you to cheer you up and the puns are so bad you might as well start laughing. He didn't even start asking what's wrong but instead waited for you to tell him yourself. He surprised you with how mature (or perhaps just experienced) he is when it comes to crying people. You feel much better even only after a few minutes and you ask Kalim how you can thank him for hearing you out. "Seeing you smile again is reward enough!" He replies and you feel like crying again (but this time not from sadness or stress). After that incident, he always personally invites you to Scarabia parties, hoping they might inject a little joy in your life and keep your mind off things. If you're not a fan of parties, he takes you on carpet rides around the dorm instead.
MALLEUS is shocked into silence. You were smiling at him as sweetly as you always do just a moment ago... He knows how to comfort someone in theory, but now that he has to put it into practice, it feels like he's forgotten everything. He needs to show you that you can rely on him when it comes to your comfort, and that includes crying around him. This might just be one of the most heartbreaking sights he's ever had the displeasure of witnessing. He vows to himself that he never wishes to see you cry again (unless it's at your wedding) and would do anything to prevent it. He wordlessly pulls you into a secure hug, worried that if he does anything else, you might start crying even more. You hug him back and just sob in his arms, thankful for his warm embrace. "It will all be okay, child of man. I'm here, after all." And somehow, you can't help but trust those words with every fiber of your being. After the incident, Malleus ends up confessing what happened to Lilia and Lilia goes into one of those "Oh, how my baby has grown..." rants. But he also does say that Malleus should start inviting you to new places to keep your mind off things and help you let loose. So he does just that, with an added sprinkle of gargoyle-hunting and gargoyle facts. You're now very well educated about gargoyles lol.
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aces-parrows · 4 months
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streaming love | mark lee
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pairing: streamer!mark x fem!reader word count: 727 genre: fluff, imagine warning(s): not proofread summary: mark finally admits his feelings for you on stream, assuming that you're not currently watching.
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mark sits in front of his makeshift stream set-up in his small apartment. in no way was he a professional nor did he have a large audience. his streams were just for fun, which he started to help y/n socialize more and have fun. his streams mainly consist of him conversing with his small audience, but he does sometimes play guitar for them or spend the stream discussing fun topics together. his audience jokingly ships the two of you together, as it's not uncommon for new viewers to assume you're a couple. he regularly sees comments such as "where's your girlfriend?" or "how's y/n?" when you aren't a part of the stream, which melts his heart. he adores knowing how much his viewers love you, especially when it's you with him.
no one in mark's life knows of his feelings for you. it's a secret he's kept for years, ever since you both graduated college together. no matter how much he tried to confess his feelings for you, the courage was never found, leaving him to sit back and watch you go out on dates and console you if you got your heart broken. he always told himself one day he will be the one to show you true love, and for years he couldn't find the right moment to do it.
finally, he accepted he needed advice.
in a late night stream, mark attempted to be vague when explaining his situation. however, his audience was not easily fooled, immediately realizing he was talking about you. it was embarrassing at first, but after some reassurance that they were supportive, he had felt a bit more at ease. as the chat flooded with encouragement, he felt more comfortable to explain his feelings for you. "i don't know man," mark said as he couldn't make eye contact with the camera, "i want to make it special, you know? it's what she deserves." as he watched the chat, one of his viewers had inquired as to why he hadn't already told you how he felt. "sometimes, i don't feel like a girl like her would be into someone like me. it probably sounds stupid, but you guys don't even know a quarter of all the things that make y/n so special." mark checked the chat to be sure you weren't watching. he had assumed you would be asleep by now, meaning that the chances of you catching this stream was slim, especially since he planned to delete the stream right after. the late night rain gently tapped his window outside, adding to his dropping mood as he wondered if he was even good enough for you. "she's the most important person in my life and i'm so damn tired of guys breaking her heart, you know? i want to show her true love, but how can i do that if i can't even be honest about my feelings? like, do i give her chocolate, flowers, or just go for it? like what makes a confession special?" mark looked over all of the chat's advice, opinions, encouragement, and overall support. he truly felt he had connected to his audience in this moment. he had found his people, who not only loved his content, but him as a person. and you as well.
he continued to pour his heart out, talking about his favorite memories with you and how much he adored you.
mark did not know that the whole time, you had been watching the stream. it was one of your sleepless nights, so you decided to catch mark's stream just as he had began pouring his heart out to his viewers. your heartbeat was the fastest it had ever been and you couldn't wipe the grin off your face. it all felt like a dream, but it wasn't.
admittedly, you had liked mark for a few months but never had the courage to confess either. you dated other men to try and forget him, but they just weren't mark, so, they never went anywhere.
as mark concluded his stream to head to bed, you knew you couldn't lose this beautiful moment. ever. so, you shoot him a text.
"hey, saw your stream. please don't delete the stream, i never want to forget the words you said. by the way, i'll accept those chocolates. let's talk tomorrow, okay?"
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rose-pearls · 8 months
Note
Hi! Could request something for clarisse x reader? Where reader is daughter of persphone and she’s sweet and kind but also strong and intimidating and can stand for herself and that’s what clarisse likes abt her
Hi! Thank you for the request! I hope you like it!!
Main Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187, @nyx2021, @thestarspangledcaptain, @kmc1989 (open)
Percy Jackson Taglist: @niktwazny303 (open)
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Clarisse loved her girlfriend, but she could sometimes be too kind towards others, most specifically towards a certain Poseidon’s son.
“I don’t understand why you dislike him so much, he is a sweetheart,” you tell her one evening, wrapped in her arms as she tries not to fall asleep as your fingers brush against her skin delicately.
“I just don’t like him, he brings too much attention to himself,” she says, feeling a bit annoyed at the turn of conversation but as she smells the delicate smell of honey blossom, she feels herself calm down. Every child of Persephone had a certain smell of flowers that followed them, but it could change due to their mood. The only flowers she could pinpoint in yours were honey blossom and roses when Clarisse managed to make you blush or when you got angry.
“He doesn’t do it on purpose, just give him a chance,” Clarisse was happy when you then turned the conversation to another topic, not wanting to spend more time than necessary on the stupid topic of Percy Jackson. 
Everyone knew you were kind; it was something that was known around camp when you helped others around, but it was also known that you were Clarisse’s girlfriend and that you were fiercely loyal to the Ares daughter. Some people saw it as a flaw, your unwavering loyalty, but she only saw it as proof of your love.
Kindness was often seen as a weakness, but Clarisse could make a whole book about you where she proves that entire point wrong, you had proven that to her when playing capture the flag. You weren’t just as sweet as a blossom but just as deadly as a rose, she had seen you throw a dagger at the head of a camper, only slightly cutting the skin of his cheeks.
“Try to take the flag again and this time I won’t avoid cutting your face entirely,” the sweet daughter of Persephone had said with a tone that would make even the god’s tremble. And that is how Clarisse had fallen for you; hard and fast as she saw you cutting through the other team as if you were just helping the Demeter kids growing flowers. 
She had been waiting patiently, or not as she had no patience, for Chiron to reveal who would be on which team in Capture the flag. Rules had been made at one point that the Athena and Ares cabin would always be on opposite teams as they couldn’t get along, just like their parents. But the other cabins were often mixed up between the two.
“I can’t believe he would do this to me!”, Clarisse screams, and a couple of children scramble away at the angry daughter of Ares.
“Clarisse?”, you ask softly, making her slightly relax as she smells the comforting smell of flowers. You seem worried, hands on your hips as you look at her with wide eyes.
“Chiron put you on Annabeth’s team, I’m sure that little devil is really happy right now,” she murmurs the last part, crunching the paper in her hand as she begins to plot her revenge.
Your hand softly covers her, and she feels your fingers slowly stroke a pattern on her hand to try and get her to loosen her grip on the paper. When she finally does let go you take a look at the paper, humming to yourself as you see the teams.
“You have the Hermes cabin, which means you have Luke. Not all is lost my love,” Clarisse can’t help but blush at the nickname, you didn’t say it that often but when you did it would turn her into a blushing mess, just like right now.
“I would rather have you then Castellan and the other pipsqueaks,” she says, going back to her grumbling but she looks at you as you laugh softly.
“Common, it will all be alright. This is good, now you can already mentally prepare yourself to lose,” Clarisse raises her eyebrows at your statement, a smirk can be found on your glossed lips.
“Oh, really? And what you think that you are going to win this?” she whispers as she gets closer to you and you nod, confidence radiating off you.
“Of course, I will, and I will enjoy wiping the floor with your bodies,” you say and Clarisse doesn’t know if she feels competitive or hot and bothered at the sight of you so confident.
“Better prepare yourself to prove that statement princess, wouldn’t want to see you crying on the floor at the end,” Clarisse says, and she enjoys the scoff you let out at her words.
“Give me your worst La Rue,” you tell her, and she can only whisper it back before brining you into a heated kiss, efficiently bringing the conversation to a stop.
--
She should’ve known Annabeth would be using you against her, after all the girl was smart even at the age of twelve.
“Funny seeing you here,” she hears you say, and she can’t help but snort at your words before seeing a dagger in your hand.
“Common princess, really? Just one dagger?”, she can’t help but say, feeling already like they were going to win this game of Capture the flag.
“I don’t need more, you on the other hand seem to have a lot of weapons on you. Isn’t that too much weight?”, you ask her, with that sweet voice you always used on her, if you had been a daughter of Aphrodite, it could’ve been seen as charm speaking. But then again it only seemed to work on her. 
You get closer to her, much more than how close you would usually get to an opponent, but she doesn’t say anything as she can only enjoy the touch of your fingers as you adjust her strap.
“You look so stunning in this, like a real warrior,” she knows you are trying to get to her, get her to lower her guard and it works, of course it does.
“Please don’t be mad at me?”, you whisper and before she can ask why you push her in the direction of the water, her sibling quickly falling with her as an invisible Annabeth pushes him.
“Percy, now!”, Annabeth yells and the boy manages to crash a huge wave on them before they can try to get up. The girl takes the flag and puts her cap on before running as fast as she can through the forest.
“Good job water boy,” you tell him as he comes out of the water, somehow already completely dry with a smirk on his lips. 
“This was fun!”, he says before he sees a glaring Clarisse starting to stand up and running away in the direction of the blue flag.
“I cannot believe you just did that,” the Ares girl says with furrowed eyebrows, and you can see the glare in her eyes.
“I’m sorry, it was Annabeth plan, and I couldn’t really tell her that I wasn’t going to do it,” you tell her, but she grumbles under her breath, still looking beautiful even completely wet.
“I’ll make it up to you,” you tell her as you get closer to her, and she raises her eyebrows in interest.
“Really? How?”, she asks, and you smile as you wrap your arms around her neck, smiling even wider as you feel her arms slowly circle around your waist.
“You can decide, I’ll do anything you want for the rest of the day,” you tell her, and a flicker of mischief appears in her eyes, and you know far too well what that means.
“Except for pushing Percy into the water,” you tell her, and a pout appears on her lips.
“Fine, I want you to spend the rest of the day with me and give me your dessert at diner. I also want a back massage,” she has a smirk on her lips, and you quickly nod in agreement, excited to spend the rest of the day with her.
“And one more thing,” she says but before you can ask what her hands on your hips twist you around and push you into the cold water. 
As you come back up, you can’t help but laugh at your satisfied girlfriend.
“Now we’re even,” she says before taking her armor off and joining you into the water.
--
Requests are open!
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disneyprincemuke · 7 months
Text
how you get the girl * fem!driver
and when logan comes in with a girl on his arm, then what?
pairings: logan sargeant x fem!driver, liam lawson x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver
notes: hi it was only a kiss was the beginning of the end for my locky soldiers i fear and here u go lOLSIE OXOXOXOOXOOXOXO
(series masterlist) | (📂 the sophomore year)
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“did you see?”
she tilts her head, turning around with her eyebrows furrowed. liam has walked around the barrier of their garages, sauntering in with his hands behind his back. “seen what?”
liam blinks at her. he purses his lips and shakes his head, scrunching his nose. “nothing.”
“what do you mean?” she laughs, putting her ipad down. “was i supposed to see something? why are you being weird?”
“i think he means logan and his girlfriend walking into the paddocks together.”
just like that, she can almost hear the glass around her shattering. there’s a ringing in her ears and she turns to sebastian with wide eyes and puffy cheeks. “what?”
sebastian blinks at her, his clipboard of data in his hands. “you didn’t know? don’t you guys live together?”
she blinks rapidly, trying to come up with an excuse. truthfully, only 2 people ever found out about the events of new year’s day. one of those was by default, logan’s brother, and she’d pulled liam aside during their team trip to new york to confess and vent about the events of her stay in miami.
liam’s been sworn to the highest level of secrecy, and she’s appreciated the fact that he’s kept his word. he never brings it up unless she does it first.
which isn’t a lot.
“we uh,” she drops her head and turns back to her ipad as she sucks in a deep breath, “we’ve been kinda busy lately. i didn’t know he was seeing somebody now. i was in los angeles for a while during the break.”
“that’s,” sebastian trails off, “odd. is it still weird after what happened in montreal? i thought everything was okay.”
she looks up. “it is! everything is okay! we’ve just been super busy,” she rambles, “you know… i’ve flown around for d&g and a couple of fenty events. haven’t really had the time to sit down and have a chat recently.”
sebastian hums, unsure if he’s fully buying her excuse yet. “i see. have you guys not gone to get ice cream lately?”
she shrugs and points at liam, “our schedules never really line up. sometimes logan is there, but not often. even then, there’s always something more important to talk about than our dating lives.”
liam finally clears his throat, making her eyes snap over to him. “let’s go? we’ve got an interview in a couple of minutes.”
she grins, turning to sebastian. she gives him a quick hug and hangs her head low before she follows liam back into the paddocks. “seriously? i didn’t know logan had a new girlfriend.”
“have you seriously not seen each other that you didn’t know about his new girlfriend?” liam whispers, looking around cautiously to ensure that nobody’s got the chance to eavesdrop on their conversation. he takes a step forward towards her and drops his head. “how do you feel?”
she pouts her bottom lip out with a shrug. “good for him, i guess.”
there’s no way that’s the only thing she has to say, right? “really? you’re okay with this?”
her eyes trail off to the crowd surrounding them, as if to really think over her answer, then turns back to him. “yeah, why wouldn’t i be?”
“you’re totally over the fact that you kissed on new year’s?”
“liam,” she scolds through gritted teeth, smacking his arm lightly. “you were sworn to secrecy.”
“i haven’t told anyone,” he throws his arms into the air, “but are you seriously okay with this? it’s just me — you can tell me if it bothers you.”
she tilts her head with a small grin. it’s endearing how liam is double-checking. but it’s been 7 months since they kissed. she’s kind of well over the fact by now. “i’m really okay. i’ve just been super busy. i flew in from los angeles right before touching down here. we haven’t really crossed paths in the apartment lately.”
liam pats her on the shoulder. “okay. but you can tell me anything, okay? don’t keep it in, mate.”
she smiles, “promise.”
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max lifts his eyebrows, following the pair that’s just walked past him nonchalantly. his lips part in confusion as he then furrows his eyebrows and turns to the girl now approaching him. “was that logan holding hands with a girl?”
she follows his stare, tilting her head slightly. “yeah. i heard he brought his girlfriend to the race today.”
“you heard?” max scowls. “you didn’t know he had a girlfriend? aren’t you best friends who live together?”
she shrugs, “we haven’t seen each other a ton lately. we’ve been busy in our own right.” she puffs her cheeks out. “why is everyone so baffled that i didn’t know he has a girlfriend? he is a grown man!”
max puts his hands in the air as a small smile stretches his lips. “mate, relax. i was just curious. cause i thought you guys liked each other?”
“that’s crazy. where did you get that from?” she almost wants to laugh if it weren’t for the fact that max hit the jackpot with that guess. she only hoped that her wide eyes and racing heart didn’t give too much away. “he’s my best friend. with a girlfriend or not.”
max gives her a stare, one that tells her that he definitely isn’t buying her bullshit excuse. he lifts an eyebrow at her and sighs audibly. “really? you’re going to keep lying about you guys just being friends?”
she rolls her eyes. “your late-night gaming is taking a toll on you, i believe. you’re seeing things that aren’t there, max.”
“sure,” he snorts. “everyone can tell, by the way. alex, george… we know.”
she tilts her head and bats her eyelashes at him innocently. “i don’t seem to know what you mean.”
“that you and logan, at some point or another, liked each other,” max explains. “it’s only so obvious. mark my words, andretti racing driver, you guys are going to end up together someday be it in the near future or even it takes you years to figure things out.”
“you belong in a mental hospital.”
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“rocky!” she feels a hand around her elbow pulling her back immediately, stumbling back a couple of steps with a soft yelp before she feels a hand on her back that steadies her. she knows that hand.
“why did you have to yank me like i’m an animal?” she whines, shaking away logan’s grip on her. “what do you want? i have a team meeting i’m gonna be late for.”
“i want you to meet somebody,” logan grins, stepping aside hesitantly. “ylona — my girlfriend.”
she tilts her head and into focus comes a slightly smaller girl compared to logan. slightly taller than her, tanned skin and the prettiest brown eyes she thinks she’s ever seen. ylona has her hands clasped in front of her shyly with a small and polite smile.
“oh, hi!” she squeals as her arm immediately darts out towards the girl. “i’m so sorry i just only got the chance to meet you now. i’ve been so busy — i’ve been out of the country lately.”
“yeah, i,” ylona laughs sheepishly and takes her hand, “i love your apartment, by the way. there’s no way you’re not an interior designer or something.”
she scrunches her nose. now, how is she supposed to hate someone as soft-spoken and lovely as ylona? she takes a deep breath, subtly looking ylona up and down. she’s just so pretty. “my younger sister actually helped with the apartment. i’d love to hang out with you after the day ends if you guys are joining us for ice cream?”
logan nods, his stare lingering on her in a way that she’s unsure what he’s trying to say to her. “of course. i’m not missing another ice cream night again in my life.”
“good!” she grins, patting his shoulder. “i’ll see you guys around. i’ve got to run.”
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“who the hell is that!” alex barges into her room, george following suit as she takes sips from the drink in his hand. “when did logan get a girlfriend?”
she looks up from her phone, baffled at the comfortability that the older drivers have found in her hospitality home. especially her driver’s room. “you know, just because sebastian gives you guys immunity in the andretti hospitality doesn’t mean you should take advantage of it.”
“who is that girl? how did they even meet?”
george points at her beanbag, looking at her innocently as if to ask for permission. she nods and beckons him towards it before turning to alex. “i don’t know. i only just met her today.”
“like it’s so– what? you just met her today?”
“you also just met her today?” george pouts his bottom lip out, unsure if he should be concerned or impressed at logan’s success in hiding a secret from her. “how weird.”
“it’s seriously not that weird! we’re adults with our own lives!” she scoffs, returning her attention to her phone. “she seems lovely if you ask me. very pretty, very polite.”
she’s just opened her phone to send a message when it disappears abruptly, alex taking it into his hands and slipping it into his back pocket. “you’ve got to tell us more. there is no way you found out today like the rest of us peasants.”
she shrugs with a soft laugh. “i really have got no idea when or how they met. i’ve barely hung out with logan since we were in barcelona for the spanish gp. i’ve been frequenting los angeles a lot recently.”
“what are you doing in america instead of oxford with your family?” george scowls. “the fame’s gotten to you, mate.”
she rolls her eyes. “i’ve got sponsorships i need to show up for. seriously, it’s not that serious. logan’s 23 — let him have his girlfriend.”
“she is very quiet too, actually,” alex hums, dropping himself on the bean bag, and squeezing in with george, who scowls and pushes him away slightly to regain his space. “i don’t know. do i like her?”
george furrows his eyebrows. “logan isn’t your best friend. why are you speaking like that about his girlfriend?”
“hey, she’s going to be in the garage for a while. i have to make sure it’s an environment that i feel comfortable in.” alex looks to her for some support. “you get what i mean, right?”
she shrugs. “i guess you have a point. but you know… you can just ignore her if you don’t like her, alex.”
“it’s not the same though,” alex sighs, dropping his hands in his lap. “promise you’ll tell me when you find out more about her?”
“why don’t you just ask logan yourself?” george asks.
“he keeps running away when he sees me,” alex frowns. “i think it’s because i keep asking him if he likes rocky. i guess it’s not a good look if i keep asking that when his girlfriend is around.”
“you twat, why would you ask him that at all?” she scolds, hurling the small stuffed animal next to her towards alex. “such a stupid question to ask!”
alex catches the stuffed animal and chucks it right back at her. “i’m curious! for the record,” he rolls his eyes, “he avoids that question too!”
“that’s just stirring up the pot when you don’t have to, alex!” she hops off her massage table and runs over to where the 2 men are, arm wound back to hit the thai driver. “you’re so annoying! what is your problem?”
“i was curious!” alex screams to defend himself. “if you hit me, i’m telling james and he’ll never let you into our building to see logan.”
“i won’t have to. he’s got ylona now,” she points out before turning on her heel. “do you guys wanna go grab some coffee?”
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“i know, i know,” oscar whispers, “it’s a bit sudden, isn’t it? i can’t believe he didn’t tell us.”
lily nods, leaning on the wall of the mclaren’s racing home as they await their friends so they can leave to get some ice cream. “i can’t believe even rocky didn’t know.”
oscar raises his eyebrows in shock. for him to now know, is one thing, but for logan’s literal roommate to not know of ylona’s existence until today? that’s just weird and even borderline off.
from the corner of his eye, he sees the young driver approaching them, typing away on her phone with a small grin on her face. he furrows his eyebrows and hits her gently on the shoulder as she comes to stop in front of them.
“what?”
“you and logan are being so weird lately,” oscar confesses. “seriously. what happened between both of you in the united states?”
she blinks at him. “nothing. we were just busy.”
“not spending valentine’s day together is one thing. but you didn’t even know about his girlfriend? you usually know everything,” oscar whispers, looking over his shoulder to make sure that logan’s not anywhere close to them. “what’s going on?”
“i’ve just been very caught up with my own things lately,” she laughs, putting a hand on oscar and lily’s shoulder. “relax. nothing happened between us.”
but she swears that there are some nights that she can feel logan’s lips on hers. it drives her crazy, actually. “relax. let’s just get ice cream and get to know her. it doesn’t have to be weird.”
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linkspooky · 1 month
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Ciel-Noel post
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Revenge is bad, actually. Simple revenge in stories is boring and uninteresting and Kill Bill is a bad movie.
I dislike the idea of punitive justice in stories to begin with, at least in stories that don't look critically at it. However, I also think people often get punitive justice (a branch of moral philosophy) with the idea of narrative punishment (actions have consequences in stories). I'm not against narrative punishment at all, well-written stories should have direct consequences for all the important characters actions. If a character is a noble gas and no one reacts to their actions, then they are stagnant and unchanging. A character who is constantly reacting to other people, and provoking reactions in return, is a dynamic character.
Now that I've thoroughly buried the lead six feet under, let's get to the main event. Ciel and Noel is a tightly written tragedy in the horror genre. If you've ever watched a slasher movie before, horror operates on like, an extreme kind of narrative punishment. People always joke that if you have sex, or do drugs, or drink alcohol in a horror movie the slasher will kill you and yeah, that's basically it. Horror movies are relenting and unforgiving, you basically take one step out of line and get stabbed in the back for it. So, it's not at all surprising that in the same story where Ciel experiences a change of heart and goes from seeing Shiki not as a victim but another vampire to kill, to being willing to sacrifice everything to save him, Noel does not get saved. Doesn't that make Ciel a huge hypocrite going the extra mile to save her boyfriend, but putting a bullet in the head of the partner she's known for years to put her out of her misery? Why, yes. Yes it is. That's also the point.
Ciel (and Noel's) route in the Tsukihime remake are about two girls who are the victims of the same tragedy. One gets saved, one does not. One finds a person who will do anything to reach and redeem their humanity, the other does not. They both get worse and worse, but one is given a helping hand at their lowest point, and the other gets a bullet between the eyes. This is unfair, and cruel, and again the point. Nasu in the remake turned one of the routes with the happier ending into a bitter tragedy no matter which of the two endings you pick and it's great.
Nasu is a writer who understands the tools of storytelling and with Ciel and Noel, wrote a tightly constructed tragedy where both characters face a narrative punishment. Once again, narrative punishment means for every action the character takes in the story, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Characters don't get away scott free with anything. They reap what they sew. This gives the characters actions meaning, and feels like they are building towards an arc because there is an underlying point that the author is trying to make to us, by framing these characters actions in a certain light.
Nasu employs narrative punishment, sometimes even incredibly harsh narrative punishment (read every wrong choice in FSN where Shirou gets horribly maimed or just Shirou's life in general). However, Nasu does not believe in punitive justice. I mean, I made a joke about Oberon up above but like, Nasu literally wrote an entire FGO Lostbelt chapter showing how chaotic evil the fairies were, and then he still underlined it's wrong to punish people without a chance for redemption or atonement by making Oberon the final boss. Even Castoria who is an ultimate victim of the fairies who was locked in a barn and treated like an animal, and didn't even want to save them was still like "This is wrong, we should have given them some chance to redeem themselves."
That belief that punishment without the chance of redemption is wrong, is written into the core of Ciel and Noel's tragedy.
So anyway, let's get to the part where I start recapping the story with analysis so you guys have some frame of reference for what I'm talking about. Noel is a previous victim of Roa, a vampire that continually reincarnates by hijacking bodies. A victim of ROA slowly becomes possessed until the two personalities effectively merge, at which point Roa goes on a killing spree. This happened to Ciel in her french village, Ciel noticed intrusive thoughts of a voice in her head telling her to kill her family, kill her family, kill her family, and did her best to ignore and suppress them until she couldn't. She then tore out her parent's throats, and then went on a rampage only to be killed by arcueid a short while after. Not before killing basically everyone in the town except for Noel.
Ciel and Noel are the lone survivors of ROA's massacre, and both victims of ROA himself. Ciel and Noel are also the same person, so like, write that down. Are you taking notes? This is gonna be a long post you better be writing down bullet points. Big bullet point number one, Ciel and Noel are the same person this is going to be on the test later.
Is the massacre, and all the deaths that occurred Ciel's fault?
No, you'd think logically being possessed by someone else and only having your agency taking away from you would clear you from responsibility.
However, Ciel was taken in by the catholic church afterwards and they weren't having any of that forgiveness shit. Ciel after miraculously recovering from her death at Arcueid, no longer under Roa's possession, is killed repeatedly by the church, only to find she's immortal now. No matter how many times they try to torture her, or execute her to give her justice for the victims of the massacre it doesn't work. So, instead they eventually just recruit her to be a vampire hunter. Bla bla bla, metaphor for how punitive justice doesn't actually accomplish anything, bla bla bla, metaphor for how Ciel's way of redeeming herself by hunting down and punishing other vampires (which is also just revenge) doesn't work because there's no end to it, there's no forgiveness or absolution, it's just eternal suffering. Would a loving god who created the world and preaches about forgiveness really make a hell where all the really bad people get sent to, and never get any chance of redemption?
“A God who could make good children as easily a bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every one of them happy, yet never made a single happy one; who made them prize their bitter life, yet stingily cut it short; who gave his angels eternal happiness unearned, yet required his other children to earn it; who gave is angels painless lives, yet cursed his other children with biting miseries and maladies of mind and body; who mouths justice, and invented hell--mouths mercy, and invented hell--mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness multiplied by seventy times seven, and invented hell; who mouths morals to other people, and has none himself; who frowns upon crimes, yet commits them all; who created man without invitation, then tries to shuffle the responsibility for man's acts upon man, instead of honorably placing it where it belongs, upon himself; and finally, with altogether divine obtuseness, invites his poor abused slave to worship him!” ― Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger
So, already we're touching on both justice, and also the hypocrisies of certain western religions, by Nasu demonstrating that justice without forgiveness accomplishes nothing. Ciel trying to redeem herself in the eyes of the church is truly the sisyphus pushing the boulder up the hill of redemption arcs, because there's no forgiveness, only hard labor for her sins. Ciel will just keep killing vampires to atone until she dies, but she can't die, so that boulder will keep rolling up that hill.
This is the underlying point of Ciel's entire arc, Ciel does not save anybody. She kills vampires. By killing vampires she hypothetically stops them from killing future victims, but that's not saving them. One of the most poignant things I've ever read from Nasu was from UBW where Shirou says more or less if there's a bank robber holding up a bank, and a cop comes in and shoots the robber through the chest, that might save all the hostages but the bank robber didn't get saved. You might say, well obviously, you can't save everyone. It makes sense that you'd save the innocent victims first. At which point I would say yes, I know, I have in fact consulted the ancient texts, UBW is my most replayed route.
However, Ciel and Noel's conflict gets that same point across because there are no innocent victims between the two of them. Ciel and Noel are both victimized, robbed of their agency, and go on to do terrible things, but one of them is saved and one is not. Noel isn't the bank robber in that metaphor, she's the hostage who was cooperating with the bank robber because the robber had a gun to her head, who the swat team decided to snipe through the window.
Noel is introduced as an entirely new character in the remake, she is the only other survivor of the massacre. While Ciel has memories of herself committing the crimes and feels guilt for that, Noel watched everyone die and was tortured for days on end by Roa in Ciel's body for their amusement (someone who was so insignificant to them, that Noel refers to herself as just one chip in a bag of chips Roa was snacking on. That's right, Noel is a cheeto in the grand scheme of things). There is one quote I love from John Dies at the End where John talks about how they're not chess pieces, they're not pieces on the board, they're so insigificant that they're just a cheeto sitting on the outside of the board. That's Noel, she's a cheeto.
The thing is Noel seems to be somewhat narratively aware of the fact that in the grand scheme of things she is a cheeto. Noel and Ciel are both victims of the massacre turned vampires, Ciel is a vampire killing machine and Noel sucks at it. Ciel despite being some rando apparently is born with enough magic circuits to make ancient magus families jealous, and on top of that is the only one who ever survived Roa's possession (and got immortality to boot). In every generation there is a chosen one, she alone will stand against the vampires and the demons and the forces of darkness. She is the slayer. So you've got Ciel the Vampire Slayer, and Noel who's just a cheeto. The cosmically ordained protagonist of reality, and just some guy. Noel has to basically beg and scrape to get by, no matter how hard she works she doesn't get stronger, she doesn't get any cool super powers from the night roa burned down her home town she just gets trauma. She also doesn't get a special boyfriend who will do anything to try to give her a normal life. This is illustrated in true tragic irony, by showing that Noel had a crush on a japanese foreign exchange student who's clearly meant to foil Shiki and he was basically the support she leaned on for the entirety of the tragedy, he dragged her away from danger multiple times, only to find out the reason he saved her was to use her as zombie bait so he could make his escape.
Here's where Noel starts to shine because in a typical narrative, Noel would be the more sympathetic character. People like rooting for the underdog. However, Nasu dares to be different by making Noel extremely difficult to empathize with. For one she's extremely predatory in the way she makes constant uncomfortable advances on Shiki the main character. She's also predatory in the sense she enjoys preying on things weaker than her. She says it line for line, weak people have to pick on those weaker than them. Noel goes after small fry vampires for revenge, and to vent her frustrations, however, she doesn't just kill them she rips them to pieces and tortures them in the most inhumane way possible until they're begging for death.
Why would anyone sympathize with the weak, predatory, pathetic noel who only ever makes excuses and blames others to run away from responsibility, over the stoic, strong ciel who is willing to hunt vampires forever to take responsibility for her actions.
Well here's the thing, *gestures for you to come closer, and then whispers in your ear* all the shit that Noel pulls, Ciel does that too. Ciel and Noel are either the same age, or around the same age, so if Noel is a predator for hitting on Shiki than so is Ciel. It's almost like something happened to them in their youths that stopped all their mental development rendering them both like mentally 16. Noel mercilessly slaughters vampires for revenge, and so does Ciel. She just does it offscreen. We don't know if she tortures them or anything, but remember when Ciel hunts Shiki, how she knows that Shiki is a helpless victim in all this and still goes out of her way to twist the knife, hurt him both physically and emotionally in every way possible before making the final blow.
The reason she acted that way during her and Shiki's confrontation isn't because she was stoically forcing herself to kill Shiki because that was the right thing to do, no she was projecting herself and her survivor's guilt for not killing herself before Roa went on his massacre all over Shiki. She was getting her revenge on a helpless victim because projecting on Shiki was a way for her to punish herself. Noel hates herself for being weak, Ciel hates herself for not being strong enough to slit her throat before everything happened (ergo being weak). They both deal with this self hatred by projecting that onto vampires, even vampires who were turned against their will (especially those ones tbh) and slaughtering them. They were both taken in by the church and taught to do that, so the church could get two child soldiers to send to die fighting vampreis. Ciel is Noel, and Noel is Ciel.
Not only does Noel project her past self and her weaknesses onto vampires, she projects herself onto Ciel. In that Noel really wants to be Ciel. Which is understandable, would you rather be, a girl who's only super power is... having an axe, or a girl with like seventeen million cool weapons, has more mana circuits than most mages, and is fucking immortal.
That's just the surface though, Noel is on like fifteen levels of projection with Ciel. Noel's identity is incredibly tied up in her complicated feelings towards Ciel, both because Ciel is the face of the person who committed every atrocity to Noel, but also because they are the two lone survivors of the same tragedy. Noel and Ciel both try to make themselves into tools for killing vampires to cope with their survivor's guilt, and their inability to conceive of themselves having a normal life after what they have been through. They also were both denied any chance at healing, because the church swept in and fashioned them into hunting dogs to sick on the vampires, and fight those vampires until they die. They are also both convinced that the church is right for doing this, and that deep down they either cannot have (Noel) or do not deserve (Ciel) normal lives while they both secretly pine for it anyway. Both of them are denied the chance for recovery, (because revenge does not heal), and Noel takes that one step further by deliberately driving a wedge into Ciel's recovery.
To quote you Comun, even though you're the one that sent this ask:
And Noel is a character inserted in Tsukihime to thwart Ciel's steady recovery. A constant reminder of what she lost and how the blood is in her hands. To cope with the sins Roa used her body for, Ciel chose to be the Holy Church's most professional extermination machine. Noel is the only survivor of her village because Elesia also died that night, being replaced with Ciel, who is fueled not by emotions but by a vampire kill count. And while Noel is a petty bitch at heart, she genuinely believes Ciel's post-trauma life choice and respects her capability to pull it off. There's no sabotage to their partnership not because Noel is afraid to defy someone a million times stronger than her, but because Noel wholeheartedly agrees with Ciel's choice to never recover and to pay blood for blood for the rest of her potentially eternal life. As long as Ciel stays Ciel, Noel's vengefulness is directed solely at Roa. But then Shiki enters Ciel's life bringing with him semblances of normal happiness. The murder machine began to regain emotions. And to Noel, that's a problem.
So part of this is you know, buying church propaganda. Ciel and Noel are both victims of the same church that does not heal or save people, and only doles out punishments on the guilty.
Part of this is an interesting twist that adds complexity to Noel's character, because like she could blame Ciel for the massacre like the church does, and like Ciel does herself, but as you point out Noel clearly wrestles with that. Noel feels a mix of envy for a twisted respect, one could even say love for Ciel's strength. Noel shows a much more nuanced reaction to Roa wearing Ciel's face and killing her entire family and torturing her for days on end, when she could take the church's approach, or even Ciel's approach towards Shiki. Noel even talks about at length how her and Ciel used to bond together by talking at night about how they were going to get revenge for everyone who died that day. Noel can't just see Ciel as the villain who took everything away from her, because they are the only two survivors of the massacre.
As you said there's no sabotage to their partnership, because despite Noel being the most petty bitch ever she never does anything to hurt or betray Ciel. The reason their partnership falls apart is entirely Ciel's fault. Sure, Noel was dancing on the edge of a cliff and not the most stable person to begin with, but it's Ciel's actions that push her off that cliff.
Not only does Noel drive thwart Ciel's recovery, she also makes Ciel look like a terrible person. Because, Ciel is a terrible person. In the same route where Shiki constantly lovebombs Ciel and constantly talks about all her good traits and what a hero she is, and Ciel gets several very cool action scenes making her look like a cool vampire slayer, we also witness to Noel's soul and heartcrushing downward spiral that is caused in part by Ciel kind of not really giving a shit about Noel's feelings. Noel's downfall could have been stopped at any point by Ciel simply lifting a finger, or just noticing her partner's obvious distres but instead what Ciel does is Noel completely out of the loop (like not telling Noel that she was waiting for Roa to reveal himself before attacking Shiki) .
Like, the scene where Noel turns into a vampire is directly caused by Ciel's actions. Noel reveals to Shiki that he's currently possessed by Roa. Ciel stands up for Shiki, in what we think is Ciel not wanting to believe that Shiki is possessed by Roa. However, what we learn instead is that Ciel only approached Shiki in the first place because she assumed he would be Roa's first target, and has been keeping by his side constantly waiting for Roa to appear so she can murk him.
So, all Ciel needed to do was TELL NOEL that she was playing the long game and ask Noel to wait a little longer before showing their hand, but apparently basic communication with her partner is too much effort for Ciel.
This leads into a scenario where not only does Noel think Ciel has broken their partnership (i mean she kinda has) but Ciel directly injures Noel pretty badly and leaves her alone. When Arach shows up to prey upon Noel, Noel can't even fight back by that point. Arach is the bus that hit Noel, but Ciel sure did throw Noel under that bus for no real reason.
I mean there is a story reason - it shows that Ciel may be an instrument of justice but she doesn't save people, in fact she does not give two figs about whether or not people are saved by her actions. Ciel obsessively hunting vampires, is not really that far off from Noel torturing vampires for her own sense of petty vengeance. However, Ciel hunts vampires offscreen so we as an audience don't see really the way, she treats the vampires she kills, but from the way she both foils Noel and also the sadistic way she draws out killing Shiki possessed by Roa as long as possible you can infer that she's not all too different from Noel. That's good actually, that Ciel seems like a good heroic person, but if you squint at her she's not much better than Noel, because like that's the entire point of her character the good, altruistic senpai never existed in the first place. All of Ciel's words about atonement and forgiveness are empty platitudes, just her regurgitating the words the church fed to her.
So finally to conclude, we have the culmination of the moebius strip, where Noel the apparent opposite of Ciel, slowly morphs into Ciel. Noel's flaws in a narrative sense led to her downfall, but let's be clear Noel had no fucking agency in her transformation into a vampire. She was hysterically begging for Arach not to do it. She was pinned and helpless to escape when it happened. It is Arach and Ciel's fault what happened to her.
Noel does make choices, but her choice amounts to not immediately killing herself the moment she became a vampire. She does take like 500 shots to become an ubervamp, but like, the story clearly states that once people become vampires their moralities and personalities are radically altered. So if that's a choice it's an influenced choice.
Therefore the only choice in that moment Noel is truly responsible for is not killing herself while she was still lucid. Irony upon ironies because that's exactly what she yells at vampires to do, bow down and let their heads be cut off by the executors. However, if Noel is guilty for not immediately offing herself, so is Ciel, so is Shiki. Both of these characters get saved while Noel gets old yeller'd. This is unfair and also, you guessed it, the point. Ciels revenge against vampires accomplishes nothing. Noel giving up her humanity for the shot at revenge against Ciel accomplishes nothing. It's almost like revenge doesn't heal, it just puts more pain and misery into the world. No one is saved by revenge.
Noel is fridged for Ciel's arc, and neither Ciel nor Shiki ultimately save her even though she's not all that responsible for her own downfall. This is not the narrative playing good victim and bad victim. If anything it makes Ciel look way worse as a person. The narrative even goes out of its way to say that both Ciel and Noel have a right to their revenge and in a situation like this the winner wasn't determined by who was right but who's stronger. Ciel has no moral high ground she just happens to be stronger, that's it. She doesn't take the higher road with Noel even after Shiki went to such great length to try to reach her emotionally and tell her she was still human, no Ciel makes no attempt to talk to Noel or take a third route she just murks her.
Noel is my favorite character for this route probably second favoeite overall behind Kohaku and I one hundred percent agree with fridging her, because it makes Ciel's character a hundred times better by giving her consequences for her flaws. It's one thing for Ciel to break down crying about how much she hates herself for being a cold merciless machine. It's another thing to have this demonstrated by Ciel letting her partner fall to the wayside by just not giving a shit about anyone's feelings or anything except for her personal quest against vampires.
Noel is a victim of the cycle of revenge, a pointless and harmful cycle. In a story that's thoroughly anti revenge as evidenced in the true end of hisuis route where Kohaku having achieved absolute perfect revenge and having her plan gone entirely right, takes a knife and gouges out her own heart with it. If that's not on the nose I don't know what is.
Its poignant comun that you told me that Nasu stated there's no good ending to Ciel's routes just a normal and a true because a good ending would have saved Noel. It might look like Ciel got off scott free but if you look at it, by killing Noel and denying Noel the chance at salvation Ciel damns herself too. Ciel has not escaped the cycle in the true ending, she's still hunting vampires at the behest of the church the only real change is she has a boyfriend now. I'd compare it to the ending of UBW vs Heavens Feel. In one Shirou has Rin's support but it's implied he'll eventually leave Rin anyway and become Archer, he just won't regret saving people as Archer did. He has not escaped the self destructive cycle. Whereas in Heaven's Feel, Shiro dies and is reborn and has to you know live as a person from now on.
Ciel did not end the cycle, she perpetuated it by killing Noel. You don't end the cycle of revenge with more revenge. Since Ciel did not end it she's still trapped in the cycle herself, and she still has support in the form of Shiki but the cycle will probably consume her the way it eventually consumed Shirou. She even broke out what was essentially the UBW with black keys when fighting against Vlov. It's just like that one post on Twitter said every few years or so someone reinvent the unlimited blade works!
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