#I don't know what I'm supposed to be feeling right now

[ephemeral-among-the-stars]

Hi there darling, saw your requests open, so I decided to slide in like the snail i am

Aventurine x reader arguments ansgt to fluff

BUT! if you're not comfortable with that, you can also write

aventurine X reader whos love language is also gift giving (like his) and reader likes to receive gifts too but feels guilty when aventurine spends too much money on them

Risking too much (ft. Aventurine)

Pairing: Aventurine x reader

Tags: angst to comfort, established relationships, slightly dark themes

Warnings: spoilers for 2.1 (mentions of Aventurine's real name), non-native english writer, might be OOC

A/N: Thank you for your request! ♡ It took some time to write, I was insanely busy the last few days, sorry qwq Don't know if this is what you wanted, but I've tried my best

-`♡´- MASTERLIST -`♡´- 

Aventurine is constantly putting everything on the line, even himself.

Needless to say, the constant risk intertwined with his life was making you terribly anxious every day. You knew that he was scared for his life, too, waiting for the fortune to leave him at any moment.

One of his recent missions was supposed to take no more than a day. "It should be a piece of cake", he said. But in the evening you were still alone, staring at the phone screen with a dozen unanswered messages. Aventurine had been online that morning, not so long after he left, but you hadn't heard from him since.

Just a horrifying emptiness.

Three long days passed before he showed up on the doorstep of your shared home, absolutely exhausted. Needless to say, you hadn't eaten or slept much the whole time, checking your private messages every now and then.

"Hey, love…" he was trying to hide his own storm of different emotions behind his usual smile. "I'm sorry, I…"

But you didn't let him finish.

"You disappeared for three days! Three!" there was so much pain and despair in your voice that every word felt like a stab to his heart. "I thought you were dead!"

To be honest, he thought he was going to die too. Maybe he lied a little about the complexity of the mission so as not make you worried, hoping that he'd get lucky and everything will end much quicker.

"Not everything went according to plan," he was ashamed to hide anything from you, even the gruesome details. "There were… Problems with some hostile people who didn't want to negotiate with IPC representatives."

"Like?.." you asked, preparing for the worst.

"Like... I was captured and they really wanted to get rid of me. But… They didn't succeed. Everything's okay now, right? I'm here. And I'm alive," Aventurine tried to smooth things over, but judging by the way tears started rolling down your cheeks, he didn't succeed either.

"Everything's okay, you say? After you nearly died?!"

His facade immediately dropped. Aventurine pressed his lips tightly together, realizing how much stress was weighting not only on him, but on you too every time. And he couldn't blame you for reacting so emotionally.

If you suddenly disappeared from his life without a word, he'd go insane.

"I'm sorry."

"I don't want an apology!" you sobbed. "I want to know that my beloved is alive and safe, that I won't have his corpse brought home to me! I'm tired of not knowing where you are or if you're okay."

Aventurine knew you had every right to be angry, to scream and cry. He just held you in a tight embrace, silently listening as you expressed everything that had built up inside you over the past three days, still repeating how sorry he was for leaving you worried.

Slowly but surely, your anger subsided, leaving only a heavy feeling somewhere in your chest. You were still crying, hiding your face in his chest. But a great weight had been lifted from your shoulders anyway.

"Please, Kakavasha," you felt him flinch at the mention of his name. "Please be careful. I don't know how I will survive without you if something happens. I've almost gone crazy these days, not knowing what to expect."

Aventurine could understand your feelings. The whole time he'd been held hostage, his thoughts were all about you, about how worried you must be, waiting for him to return.

"I won't leave you alone, no matter what, I swear," Aventurine whispered back. "I was blessed to meet you. No way I'd do anything to lose you."

You were still holding him tightly in your arms, trying to calm your racing heart. Oh, Aeons, there was no way you were going to let him get out of your embrace anytime soon.

"I'll take a few days off... A week. We can spend all this time together, alright?" he continued, gently rubbing your back. "Just you and me, doing whatever you like."

As you slightly nodded, he let out a soft sigh. How lucky he was for having you, the only person alive who really cared about him no matter what. And how ungrateful he was for keeping you worried all the time.

"Good. I've been missing you so much."

© do not repost, translate or modify without permission

[angelltheninth]

I need you to hear me out-

“Let’s ruin ourselves for anyone else” with Clark Kent for the smutty one liners

Hope you have a good day ✨

Hope you have a good day too!

Pairing: Clark Kent/Superman x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, first time having sex, size difference, gentle sex, strength kink, whimpering, blushing, size kink

Word count: 0.8k

A/N: The MAWS fandom has some kind of hivemind cause we all decided that Clark Kent was 100% a virgin.

2. "Let's ruin ourselves for anyone else."

"How... I'm sorry... but how am I supposed to fit this," Clark looked at his rock hard cock, "into there?" and then at where his finger was, inside your pussy. He was scared of this exact thing. There was always a chance he was too big for you, Clark was a mountain of a man after all.

You laughed, "Clark, you know that hole can push out a baby right? I can take that big cock of yours." You tried to make him feel better but you were nervous too. Your heartbeat drummed in his ears, making him sweat. When he moved his finger again your pussy clenched around it.

"But my finger is already filling you, what if I hurt you. I can hold back but I can't do anything about my size." He pulled his finger out to compare. His cock was quite a bit thicker. When he wrapped his hand around it the tip still fully peaked out, red and covered with pre. "And you're so small compared to me. What happens if I hurt you and ruin this?"

Doubt was written all over the superhero's face, and fear.

He could stop missiles with his hands, fly around the whole world whenever he wanted, move buildings and crush tanks. Compared to all of that you were as fragile as glass. "Then how about this..." You pulled him closer with your legs, both of you moaning when his cock parted your folds. "Clark, lets ruin ourselves for anyone else."

"What... do you mean?" His blue eyes were full of hesitation. You quirked your eyebrow at him. "Oh, it's your first time too isn't it? See, that's even more reason why I should-" His breath stopped as you took the big tip of his cock, "Should... what was I saying?" He linked a few times, eyes suddenly only able to look at where your bodies joined, "Gosh."

"How. The. Hell. Are. You. Real." You asked between kissing his square jaw. Clark grinned to himself, squaring his shoulders to appear even bigger.

"I'm from space so I'm not sure myself." Good, he seemed to be a bit more relaxed now. "I know you're trying to calm me down, but I can hear your heartbeat too. It feels like I should be the one calming you down, you're the one who'll take... it."

"It? And what exactly will I take, hm Clark?" Rolling your hips downwards you took him past his cockhead, your pussy clenching and loosening around him.

His blush went all the way down his chest. Clark never cursed, dirty talk was new to him. He did try his best, he knew you enjoyed it, hearing him say all the filthy things.

"My... cock, you'll take as much as you can. I'd love if you could take all of actually! But please don't push yourself to." Always so sweet. You nodded and urged him forward again, little by little, he probably didn't even feel pushing past your hymen but you sure did. "Can I keep going? You got really tight, did that hurt?"

"You... feel bigger than you look. Fuck, I love it. I think I'm already addicted to your big cock." You had no problem admitting that, the heat between your legs, the pressure and fullness was already getting to your head.

"My big... oh my gosh." His eyes shut closed, focusing on how he feels, trying to hone in on the increasing heartbeat, the pulsing and drumming of his own heart. He wanted to be here in this moment, with nothing from the outside world interfering. As he nudged his hips forward he suddenly found them pressed against yours. "Huh? Is it-?"

You whimpered as he tried to move but found he had no more space to do so. "Jesus, Clark, give me a minute."

"Sorry." He smiled from ear to ear, "I just can't believe you actually managed to take me." Clark leaned down for a series of quick kisses. "This feels really nice. Is it nice for you too?"

You bobbed your head and leaned it against his broad shoulder, pressing kisses along the muscle. Since you couldn't bit him your lipstick would be enough. "You can rock back and forth a little, I want to feel you move with me." He waited for you to start but the moment you started moving back he met your hips with his.

There was simply no part of Clark Kent that wanted to be rough with you. It went against his nature. You heard him groan next to your ear when your inner walls fluttered around him, your pussy taking him to the balls and your legs keeping him there. The vibrations seemed like they traveled through his whole body.

Moments after the same happened to you, your body pressing against his, nails raking down his back, "Clar- mmn! Don't move please." You didn't think you'd come so quickly, not with all the toys you used before but it seems neither of them had anything on Clark's real cock. Like a real hero he didn't let go, not until you stopped shaking so he could pull you into a proper, deep kiss.

Your smaller frame was completely enveloped in everything that was him, all his love and gentleness and muscly mass.

[prentisssgf]

| emma, emily

| criminal minds

| emily prentiss x reader

| fluff

| 3274 words

Your girlfriend, Emily Prentiss died seven months ago, it came as a shook to everyone but it hit you the hardest and to no one's surprise, you overworked yourself so much as it was now the anniversary so you needed to take a couple of days off.

"You're gonna want to come in for this one" your boss sighed over the phone.

"Alright fine, I'll be there as soon as I can" you mumbled getting out of bed.

An hour later, you had showered and were in work, you all sat around the round table, Hotch was explaining something but you couldn't really hear, not that you were intentionally ignoring him, you were just focusing on nothing in particular.

So when you looked up and you found everyone facing the door, you naturally drifted your eyes there too and there she was, Emily Prentiss.

What? Emily was alive? your girlfriend was alive all this time? all of a sudden you felt more dizzy than you already had, you were 100% sure that you were hallucinating and that you were making this up, until she hugged you, this time, her body was cold and rigid, not like her usual warm hugs, so this definitely was a dream, Emily placed a gentle hand to your cheeks to caress it slowly, you just stood there though, too afraid that if you'll reach back she'll disappear just as quickly.

"Y/N you can't imagine how I feel-" she started, anger rose within you.

"Emily can I talk to you in my office please, right now" you nodded to JJ's old office down the hall, you got there and then locked the door while she sat down on the couch "You can't Imagine how I feel" you quoted back to her "I grieved you for seven fucking months Emily, I lost the one thing that was important to me and I visited your grave every single week, for the first two months I hated myself, I hated myself for not seeing the signs and I hated myself for not being able to get to the hospital sooner, and I absolutely hated you"

"You hated me?-" you cut her off.

"My turn to speak" you barked "Do not come back here and act like everything is fine because it's not, I'm so confused with you, you couldn't have given me-oh I don't know- a heads up that you actually WERE alive?" tears thrashing down your face as you paced the room.

"Y/N please if you could just give me a chance and listen to me" she groaned.

"Why on Earth would I listen to you?" you ran your hands through your hair and huffed.

"Because-" Emily was interrupted by a knock on the door by Hotch.

"You two can go home now" he nodded.

"I- I actually don't-" Emily started, you knew what she was getting at.

"Come on" you heavily sighed as you picked up yours and Emily's to go bags as she followed you like a lost puppy to your car.

The two of you drove home in an uncomfortable silence, you gave her the silent treatment as she tried to explain herself.

It wasn't until you actually got in to your apartment that she finally started talking.

"Y/N-"

"No"

"But"

"Nope"

"Just listen to me"

"Why would I do that?"

"Because I love you, I'm still in love with you" she cried, you spun around on your heels and walked up to her, glancing over her to see if she was lying, your speciality was body language in human behaviour, so naturally you were able to tell if someone was lying or not, but if Emily Prentiss wasn't a damn good liar.

"How am I supposed to believe that?"

"Because every single minute of every day I thought of you and I wanted you I only wanted you"

"Em you said the same thing before you left" you sighed as you sat down on the armchair across from Emily, your hands covering your eyes, she didn't say anything so you just sighed and walked into the kitchen to make some food "lasagna okay?" you looked back and she looked up at you and nodded and smiled slightly.

"I died" she whispered after 15 minutes of silence.

"What?" you slung a tea towel over your shoulder and turned around.

"I coded in the ambulance, I died" she whispered slightly louder.

"Oh" you turned the stove off and walked towards her "oh honey" you squatted down on your knees in front of her "I'm sorry I acted like this, I didn't even give you a chance to explain yourself" you sighed, disappointed in yourself at the way you've been acting.

"I get it" Emily forced herself to laugh slightly "If the roles were reversed I would've acted the same way too"

"I'll get us drinks and you can tell me what happened?" you offered.

"Hmm" Emily agreed.

You got up to make the waters both of you silent, you sat next to her on the couch, putting your water on the coffee table as she had hers in between her hands.

"Whenever you're ready to talk I'm here" you smiled, extending your arm to tuck her hair behind her ears as you gave her a gentle warm smile.

"Mommy?" you heard a small voice walking out of a room "mommy who's that?" Emily turned around to see who that was and to her surprise she saw a small toddler walking out of one of the room's of your apartment, blanket in hand she made her way towards you, you turned to silently ask Emily if she was okay and she nodded.

"Hi baby" you smiled picking her up meeting her halfway "Let's get you back to bed, hmm?" you smiled, swiping her from her forehead.

"Okay" she yawned tirelessly "Who's that though?" she pushed the question again, you sighed and looked back over at Emily who was now looking down at her mug.

"She's just a friend sweetie" you smiled as you rubbed her back "did we wake you?" you said before opening her door to her room.

She kept her head down tucked into your chest but you still felt her nodding "Oh baby I'm sorry" you kissed her head, before lying her down in her bed "I love you" you kissed her cheek and then pulled the blanket up.

"I love you too mommy" she yawned and rolled onto her side, making you slightly laugh.

"I'll talk more about it with you tomorrow okay?" you smiled tucking her curly hair behind her ears once more

"Okay" she smiled.

You walked out quietly and shut the door behind her, you started walking over to the kitchen to get you and Emily both a fresh glass of water, you placed them down on the table and sighed as you fell back in to the couch.

"Em" you sighed, your head now in your hands "look-" you got cut off.

"You have a daughter?" her voice came out as a shock but she grabbed your hand.

You nodded "I adopted her a month after you.. you know...she's 4, her name is Emma" Emily looked up at you in surprise and awe

"The name was just a complement coincidence, but I saw it as a sign" you shrugged "I love Emma more than anything in this world and if you want to make it work- if you want to make us work, you're going to have to let Emma in too"

"I know that and I understand that" she smiled nodding her head.

"Good" you smiled as you curled yourself further into her and smiled.

"Are you coming to bed?" you groaned as you stood up from the couch a few hours later.

"I was gonna take the couch" Emily smiled nervously, her hand reaching the back of her neck.

"Em" you sighed "It's okay, I don't mind you can sleep with me but if you want to sleep on the couch I totally understand" you leaned down to kiss her forehead.

"I'll take the bed" she smiled, pulling you down to kiss her lips.

☆

"Good morning" you smiled at Emily, looking down she was curled up on your chest, your hands ran through her hair, untangling the knots slightly.

"Hi baby" she looked up at you and smiled, your heart was racing, this was exactly like it was 8 months ago and honestly you wanted to wake up to this sight every morning "what are you thinking about hmm?" she smiled as she realised that you were staring at her for a few minutes without saying anything.

"I just.. I just I love you" if your heart wasn't beating quickly, it definitely was now, you had been together with Emily for four years, sure you said it enough times but this time, actually losing her, you meant it more than anything in your life.

"I love you too" she smiled as she swung her legs over you and started to kiss you, which made you giggle.

"Mommy" you heard a small voice come through on the baby monitor

"I'm sorry baby, come with me?" you offered.

Emily nodded and smiled, she kissed you again and again all over your face as you started giggling.

"Hi honey" you smiled as you sat down on Emma's bed "why are you up at 6am?" you smiled curiously as you started stroking her curly hair, exactly like you were doing with Emily minutes earlier.

"Um..." she started to trail off and she looked down at her fingernails.

"Hey" you pulled her hands apart gently and pulled her towards you for her to sit on your lap "whatever it is, you can talk to me about it..." you looked up at Emily standing in the doorway "or my friend Emily, if you like" you looked over at her and she had the biggest grin on her face, she walked over to you both and squatted in front of you two.

"I had a nightmare again" her little body racked with sobs, she was embarrassed so she tucked herself in to you "I was a bad girl waking you up"

"Baby no" you pushed her shoulders out so you could see her tear stained face "there is nothing you could ever do that would make me believe that, if you ever and I mean ever, need to talk to me I will always be here, no matter what time okay, just like you did today, that was so great Emma, you did a very grown up thing and told me when you were having a nightmare instead of just staying in your room" you wiped her tears and kissed her again and wrapped your arms tightly around her.

She had started getting nightmares about 4 months in to living with you, she woke you up every time and you were glad that she trusted you that much, you knew that it was going to take some time for her to open up to you and it was a surprise to both of you for it to be so quickly.

The nightmare consisted of the same thing, you still hadn't gotten all of it yet but you got the basics; bad man, chasing after mommy, leaving Emma all on her own, that's all you could figure out right now.

"Okay" you cooed as you rubbed her back, whispering small nothings into her ear telling her it's going to be okay "It's only a dream sweetheart and I'm right here, always" you smiled as you kissed her head again.

"Can I try something?" Emily whispered to you, you smiled and nodded, perplexed at how much she was great with children "Hi sweetheart" she smiled as Emma started to turn around, still tucked in to your chest, but her full attention now on Emily "my name is Emily" she smiled "what's your name?" she reached out slowly to grab her hand.

Nodding to prompt her to understand that it's okay to talk to her "Emma" she whispered as she looked up at you, while grabbing Emily's finger with her whole hand.

"Emma, that's a lovely name" Emily and Emma both smiled, Emma looked up at you and grinned making you smile slightly.

"Thank you 'Mily" Emma smiled as she couldn't say Emily properly yet.

"So I hear you're having nightmares, can you tell me about them?" Emily reached out to tuck some hair behind her ears.

Emma looked up at you once more "you can tell her baby, it's okay" you smiled.

Emma explained the nightmares, putting her full trust in Emily, but turning away quickly, embarrassed at the fact that she did that "you did so great Em" you kissed Emma's head as you mouthed a silent thank you to Emily, who just nodded and smiled.

"Emma?" Emily questioned with her voice low, as Emma turned around slightly.

"You can sit on my bed if you want to" Emma smiled.

"Are you sure?" Emily asked and Emma just nodded "Emma what I was going to say was it's okay to have nightmares, there are loads and loads and loads and loads of people who have nightmares" the exaggeration made them both giggle, Emma already feeling better slightly "I have nightmares sometimes, and so does mommy" Emma looked up and you and you nodded.

"I do, but that doesn't make me a bad mommy right?" Emma shook her head.

"So that doesn't make you a bad baby either" you booped her nose which made her crinkle it which made you and Emily both laugh.

"Are you feeling a little bit better?" you smiled at her, she nodded.

"Good girl, you wanna get some breakfast?" you grinned "pancakes?"

"YES" Emma shouted making you and Emily laugh.

Emma shuffled out of your arms and stood up, patiently waiting for you and Emily to stand up too and go in to the kitchen.

"Mily you come too?" Emma looked up at Emily and smiled.

"Yeah sweetheart I'm coming" Emily laughed as Emma squealed, Emma quickly reached out to take Emily's hand to drag her down the hallway in to the kitchen, you grabbed your phone to take a quick picture.

You followed them in to the kitchen and you sat Emma on the counter in front of you while you made the pancakes.

"Can I help?" Emily came up behind you and placed a hand on your waist, you turned around to kiss her lips quickly while Emma was distracted.

"Absolutely" you grinned, thankful that Emily was quick to love Emma as much as you.

"Em?" you questioned "you wanna pick the music?"

"Disney songs" Emma shouted excitedly as she pumped her fists in to the air which made you and Emily smile.

"You got it, little lady" you winked as you shuffled the playlist you both made a few months ago.

It took a while longer to make the pancakes because you were all dancing and singing in the kitchen, after you did because it was both a day off for you and Emily you took Emma to the zoo and the park.

☆

"When we get here, you have to stay next to us, okay? no running off yeah?" you looked at Emma in the rear view mirror in the car, you drove and Emily was sat next to you in the passenger seat and Emma was sitting behind you.

"Yeah" Emma nodded as she absentmindedly hummed along to the radio.

"Alright" you smiled and blew her a kiss through the mirror.

It didn't take long to get to the zoo, but when you did, she stuck by you the entire time, sometimes running ahead slightly when she was excited for a specific animal but she always made sure you could see her.

Later in the day, around 2pm Emily walked up to a member of staff and three men while you had a slightly tired Emma in your arms, you could see her flash her badge and he walked away.

"Hey what was that?" you whispered as you walked up to her, thankful Emma was asleep.

"Some asshole was shoving that member of staff and he pushed him to the floor and his friends joined him" Emily shrugged.

You kissed Emily "superwoman" you replied "but seriously you're the best" you kissed her once more.

While you walked around a little more, Emma woke up but she still settled in your arms, when a member of staff walked up to you all "Emily Prentiss?" you both turned around.

"Hmm?" Emily nodded.

"I just wanted to thank you for what you did and I was wondering if you and your family wanted maybe a tour around the zoo? for free?"

You and Emily both looked at each other before looking at Emma who was profusely nodding and grinning.

"Thank you we would love that" Emily smiled "but honestly it wasn't a problem"

After your tour you decided to get some ice cream and skip the park and go straight home because she was sleeping.

☆

You drove home and you walked in with Emma and Emily took in the car seat and the rest of the bags.

You bathed Emma and you and Emily walked in to her room.

You and Emily sat on Emma's bed when she stood up and whispered in your ear "Can I sit on Emily's lap?" you had an arm rested around Emma's back for balance as she stood up, trying to hold back the biggest grin on your face, you nodded "of course baby, just ask her first" you smiled.

"Mily?" you both looked over at her, Emily's eyes darting in between yours and Emma's.

"Yeah honey?" Emily smiled.

Emma looked back at you and you nodded promptly at her "Can I?..." Emma trailed off, almost embarrassed at her question.

"She wants to know if she can sit on your lap" you smiled.

Emily's eyes began to water slightly "really?" she mouthed and you nodded "of course you can"

"Go" you nodded at Emma to Emily and her face lit up, she bounced from you to Emily who hugged her straight away.

"Too late for a story?" Emma pouted.

"Um no" you checked the time to see it was nearing 8pm "no it's not which one do you want me to get baby?" you shifted yourself off the bed and kissed her head as you kneeled in front of her bookcase.

"Guess how much I love you" she smirked.

"Alright" you got the book out of the shelf and sat down next to Emily.

About halfway through the book Emma completely fell asleep hugging Emily, truthfully none of you wanted to move so you decided to stay where you were for about 10 minutes.

"I want you to stay" you nodded "you're great with Emma and she already trusts you so much I'll talk to her about you staying forever but I need to make sure you want to do that forever first" you breathed out, running your hands through Emma's hair.

"I want to" Emily nodded "I want to do this with you, I want to be your family, I would never take your role as a mother to Emma but I do want to raise her with you, I want to be her other mother"

"Yeah?" tears streaming down your face as you sobbed.

"Yeah" Emily affirmed, you leaned in to kiss her, and then Emma's head.

"I just love you" you smiled.

"I can't wait to do this with you forever" Emily smiled, tears streaming down her face now.

"Forever"

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

A Danish Werewolf in The City

The First Taste - part 1

Note: eh... surprise! the fic was getting too long for my liking, so I splitted it up and decided to drop the first part already. So... here's the first part of the last chapter, I hope you'll enjoy it!

previous chapters: part 1 - part 2

Warnings: 18+, angst/horror. mention of blood, brief mention of (child) murder and alcohol.

Wordcount: 2,4k

Masterlist

You woke up when a cold wind embraced your body as you laid in bed, hands searching for the warm covers to pull over you when you suddenly realised something was missing. You opened your eyes and found yourself all alone, your window still open and the shredded curtains dancing eerily in the early morning breeze. You felt the pillow next to you and discovered it was cold, as was the side of the bed next to you… 

Sihtric was gone.

He had gone without a word, sneaking out of your window at a time you were sound asleep, and he had left nothing except for traces of dried blood. Vague memories of the night before began to creep back into your mind; the horrifying transforming of your boyfriend into that beast, the awful slaughter of the vampires, and the warmness you had felt when you cried into the wolf's fur after Sihtric had crawled in bed with you. Your eyes welled up at the disturbing memories, and the sight of dried blood on your sheets and windowsill were cause for concern. Sihtric had clearly been injured during the fight, but you hadn't noticed it when he was in his wolf shape. 

You jumped up and got dressed in a hurry before you rushed to your car. You knew exactly where you would find Sihtric, as there was only one place a wounded animal like him could go to…

You ran up to the doors of your occasional workplace and found them unlocked, a sign that your gut feeling had been right. The vets didn't work on weekends, unless it was an emergency, but you hadn't received any calls and so you knew that Sihtric had found his way there to fix himself up. He betrayed his presence when he heard the entrance door slam shut after you had walked in, and he accidentally knocked over a tray with medical tools in his slight scare. You were fast to figure out which surgery room he was in, and you both froze when you found each other and locked eyes.

There he was, your boyfriend, sitting on the veterinary table in his human form. He was dressed in black sweatpants with black leather boots underneath, clearly old and worn, and probably were clothes that had been tucked in a locker in his vet office in case of emergencies. His toned upper body was bare and decorated with cuts and bruises which he had collected the night before. All wounds were stitched up by now, but fresh blood was still smudged over his pale skin, as you had caught him before he could clean himself up. Sihtric's hands trembled as you stared at him, like a deer in headlights, holding a blood drenched cloth in one hand, while his other held a half empty bottle of alcohol.

'I… I'm paying for this, don't worry,' Sihtric managed to whisper hoarsely, 'I always do.'

'What do you mean you always do?' was all you could bring out.

'This… it's not the first time I come here to fix myself up,' he said, clearly ashamed, 'I heal fast, but sometimes I need stitches. And I can't go to a hospital like this without being put into an asylum or something,' he chuckled faintly, 'hospitals aren't keen on treating werewolfs anyway. And a full sized werewolf would scare the shit out of any veterinarian too. So where else am I supposed to go? I can only go here because I work here… I didn't raid your vet place because it could get you in trouble-'

'Why didn't you ask me for help?'

Sihtric stared at you, his mouth half open as he hadn't finished his sentence, and he then looked away with a light shrug. He shook his head, indicating he didn't know why he hadn't asked for your help, and had instead left you with blooded sheets and blood stains on your bedroom floor and windowsill. But the truth was that he knew very well why he hadn't asked for help, because he knew you were afraid of him and that everything had changed.

'Why didn't you wake me up?' you asked, anger and sadness evident in your voice, 'how could you… do you even know-,' you scoffed as you couldn't find the right words, and you threw your hands up, 'what… what am I supposed to do with… with you? What… how could we ever… I- I need answers, Sihtric. I need some fucking answers.'

'I'll tell you everything,' Sihtric said gloomily, 'just ask.'

You sighed, your breath was unsteady as you grabbed a chair and sat down at the desk across from the table Sihtric sat upon. You dragged your trembling hands over your face while Sihtric was quick to gulp down the remaining alcohol left in the bottle, and he placed it on the table once it was emptied. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and then stared at you intently, waiting for you to speak.

'Those vampires,' you began, holding back your tears, 'how… I mean, you killed them. I know you did, so there must be evidence left in the woods-'

'It's taken care of,' Sihtric said curtly.

'How?'

'My pack. They took care of it when I went to find you.'

'Your… pack, okay,' you nodded slowly, slightly agitated, 'and… would you turn me to make me a part of your pack?'

'No,' he said, pained, 'never, my love, never. I would never want to turn you.'

'But why not?' you frowned, almost offended at his answer.

'Because that very first transformation is awful. It hurts so much it… it cannot be put into words. And that is a pain and a fright and a torture I wish to never put you through. Nor the… the bloodlust that comes with it afterwards. And more than anything I wish to be human, darling, more than anything,' he said softly, 'I would never want to turn anyone into something I do not wish to be.'

'So… you've never turned anyone, not even those in your pack?'

'The werewolves in my pack are stray wolves I befriended over the years. I've never turned anyone. I… I've only killed.'

'Killed,' you repeated softly, and scoffed, 'those humans and those… those babies you've killed, did you enjoy that?'

'As a human? No,' he said firmly, 'but… as a werewolf? Yes, I do. Hunting and killing is part of a wolf's nature, so it feels natural. However, when I shift, half or full, I… I am still very much aware of what I do. My human mind is there, it's just not in control-'

'So you are aware that you've killed?'

'I am,' he said sadly, 'and I am not proud of that. And I haven't killed or even attacked a human in many years, I promise.'

'Then how do you feed as a werewolf?'

'Animals,' Sihtric said quietly, 'sometimes I feed on animals.'

You gasped lightly and shook your head. For a moment you buried your face in your hands, collecting your thoughts and unable to look at the man you had been so in love with less than twenty four hours ago who now looked nothing like him anymore.

'So… those wounded animals we treat here-'

'No,' Sihtric interrupted, 'I've never attacked or wounded an animal that came through here.'

'But some… some markings on them-'

'That wasn't me!' he almost barked and threw the empty glass bottle on the floor with such force, it shattered and splintered all over the ground.

You jumped up at his sudden aggression, immediately reaching for the door and wanting to leave, but you stopped when he suddenly breathed down your neck and grabbed your arm. He backed you up against the door, his trembling hands lightly holding your face, giving you every chance to shove him away, but you just couldn't get away from him, because you just didn't want to.

'I'm sorry. I am… and I… I don't know where this leaves us,' Sihtric spoke soft and hoarsely, 'but if… if you can't be with me because it's too much,' he swallowed hard, trying to sound confident and tough, but it was evident he was heartbroken, 'if my werewolf side is too much, then I understand you do not want to be with me anymore. I already… tried to accept the fact you will break up with me. And I'm sorry… I'm sorry for everything you had to witness,' his voice died with a whiny sob as he desperately fought his emotions, without success, 'I know you will leave me… I know it, but I… I don't want you to.'

You sniffled and placed your hands on his neck, while tears rolled down his cheeks as he leaned his forehead against yours. You wept silently and slowly reached for his face, gently cupping his cheeks and moving closer to kiss his lips. A kiss you drowned in as soon as he wrapped his arms around you, and you melted in his warm embrace while you tasted the alcohol with a faint hint of blood on his tongue.

'It's you,' he whispered against your lips as he cried, 'you… please, I only want you. I'm sorry. Please, don't… don't leave me… I know it's a lot, but please-'

'I- I need time,' you whispered with a sob, 'I don't know if I can… if we could ever be- I'm sorry, Sihtric, but this is just the first taste I'm getting of this side of you,' you looked up at him as he stepped back, and you wiped your tears, 'just… please, just know that I love you, okay?'

You stared up at him when his eyes became threatening while his jaw was clenched tightly. And suddenly you began to fear the man in front of you, and no longer just the beast that was inside of him.

'Sihtric,' you began to stammer as you watched him back away, 'I… I love y-'

'You don't!' he suddenly raised his voice, then exhaled sharply and looked away from you again as he started to pace around the room, 'you don't love me,' he muttered as if speaking to himself, his voice trembled while his hands raked through his loose hair and the broken glass crushed underneath his heavy boots with every step he took, 'you couldn't possibly love me, you couldn't. No one can. No one could love a monster. Just… just go, please, just go.'

'Sihtric,' you tried, 'please, just-'

'Go!' Sihtric snarled as he lashed out, 'just go and leave me!'

Several months passed since you had last seen Sihtric. You had replaced the curtains and scrubbed the blood off your wooden floor, but the claw markings outside your window were still there. You had been heartbroken since you last saw him, and even though you had expected that time would heal you up, it simply hadn't. You were still in love with him, and it was an ongoing battle inside of you ever since that frightful night in the woods. How could you love a man who could shift into a werewolf, being fully aware of his doings? Sihtric was a monster in a way, you knew that, but you also knew that he was a good man who truly loved you. 

After your abrupt break-up you slowly started to research werewolves and all beings alike, after you had taken some time to let it all sink in. You read frightening lore and heard the strangest stories as you spend hours listening to podcasts about apparent sightings. You desperately wanted to understand Sihtric and prove to yourself that he wasn't dangerous, or a monster. But you couldn't deny the horrors he had participated in and those you had witnessed yourself. And yet, after everything that had happened, you knew too that Sihtric had never harmed you and only ever wanted to protect you.

But Sihtric was, like you, conflicted about his being. He had been at peace with it and in control for the most part, but knowing it was the reason you couldn't be with him had ripped him apart. You had never called him a monster out loud, and you never had to, Sihtric could clearly read it in your eyes whenever you had looked at him the last time he saw you at the vet. And he figured that if the monster inside of him was going to destroy his life anyway and take all he loved, he might as well embrace his being 

And that's what he did. 

When human, Sihtric had delved into researching and tracing down every vampire coven nearby after you had split up. For it was vampires who had caused him to shift that night in the woods, with you by his side, so it was on them he sought his revenge. He stopped chaining himself up during the full Moon, completely destroying the set up he had made in his shed and allowing himself to shift without keeping any control over it, only to then roam the dark streets as the beast he was. Lurking in the darkness with his pack, hunting down and slaughtering every vampire they could possibly find after scouting their hideouts during the day. And the blood on his paws stained his hands too, for every cut and bruise he received as a werewolf in his reckless attempt to mend his broken heart, his human body suffered the very same damage and his eyes witnessed the murders.

Every night Sihtric would stroll by your home in his full wolf form, observing the area for hours to make sure you were safe. Some nights you woke up in the dead of night, swearing you had heard his howl in the distance or his soft whines just outside your window. But every time you looked outside, hoping to see a black wolf with mismatched eyes looking up at you, you found nothing but darkness as far as you could see. And your heart sank as you believed that it had just been another dream you had about him, like almost every night.

Sihtric became battered and bruised over time, and it angered him that he never felt better after each slaughter he had survived and each win he gained. As time continued to pass, he slowly began to realise that even if he killed every other creature of the night, it still wouldn't bring you back to him and his beating heart would remain empty and broken inside of his chest. He knew nothing would bring you back and, to his horror, he started to realise he was turning into his father after all; a cold-hearted killer. Because he may have only killed vampires, but he knew very well that, just as werewolves, not all vampires have ill intent.

And when another full Moon was approaching, Sihtric stepped into the shed in his backyard and made a list of everything he needed to restrain himself again, in order to not roam the streets and kill more of the creatures he would forever blame for losing you.

taglist: @foxyanon @alexagirlie @sihtricsafin @neonhairspray @gemini-mama

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@carnationworld @justanother-sihtricgirlie @stark-head @reidsbookstore @thenameswinter99

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@solinarimoon

if you want to be added to/deleted from the taglist, message me 🖤

[softboo]

love me, ever so gently - part III

pairing: austin x reader

summary: you recently moved to a new apartment, making some new eccentric friends along the way. but what you didn't expect was falling in love with a stranger. a stranger you somehow couldn't stop thinking about

words: 2.3k

warning: depictions of alcohol, dark themes of domestic abuse in relationships, *minors please don't interact*

author's note: hii here's part III of the story!! this one was a lot of fun to make omg and it wasn't even supposed to go this way at all... it kinda just happened lmfaoo. i'm already writing the next part heh. but yeah, it truly means the world to me that you guys read these stories. like it really warms my heart, so thank you. hope you enjoy <3

previous part // next part coming soon...

part III

"he's being abused cassie," you wanted to be straightforward on the topic, especially with how delicate the issue was. you thought she would say something, but she paused. like the weight of your words were slowly sinking in. the realization and the possibility landing right in front of her.

you were just afraid she wouldn't see it.

and she didn't.

"sweetie, what makes you say that? he seems fine."

for the past few weeks, austin started attending more events. the cooking class being one of his favorites. you no longer sat with him anymore, feeling awkward every time you spoke to each other. the silence became so deafening that you soon changed partners. but a part of you always seemed to wonder how he was doing. if he had any new bruises. if he was still healing from past injuries. if his pain was still there.

and if he was genuinely okay.

from someone who knew nothing, like the rest of your friends, he seemed to be doing amazing. and he was pretty good at keeping that front up.

maybe he found a way to put his guard up even more after you.

you all were spending dinner in the kitchen; evelyn taking her proper position as cook, insisting on making everything by scratch. it took a long time to convince her that george was there to help and when she did accept, he never left her side. making sure she had every ingredient ready.

he genuinely looked like he was a cook working for the head chef, but you and cassandra both knew he was mainly doing it for the food.

"i promise you cassie, he's not okay."

"if he wasn't okay dear, then why is he coming here to spend dinner with us?"

your eyes widened at the news, which made cassandra smile.

"you invited him?" panic started to rise up to your throat, "but why?"

"george invited him because his girlfriend is out of town for two weeks. he's going to be alone and no one deserves to be alone at a time like this."

you gritted your teeth, the thought of seeing him again after so long and now he was spending dinner with your friends made you feel slightly uncomfortable by the idea. not because you didn't want to see him, but moreso because your heart was so desperate to talk to him again.

"cassie, his girlfriend is the problem. he's probably so excited that she's gone, which is why he's attending more events."

"my love, listen to me." she took your hands from across the table, eyeing you with such intent and comfort that she let out a sigh.

"you know why i don't believe you?"

your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, not knowing where she was going with this.

"because i know how you feel about him," she waited for your reaction, but all you did was blink at her. "let's say this is true, the girlfriend is an abuser, then what?"

"then we help him right?"

"sure dear, but you need to ask yourself if you're doing that because you care about him or because you like him."

you bit your lip. why did there have to be a difference? you can care about someone right?

"and if it's the latter, you need to wait and see if he'll reach out to you. because again, he is taken."

that last part stung because it was true. some little part of your heart thought that maybe, just maybe, if he left his girlfriend, you could come in and be everything he deserved.

but it wasn't that easy. and he wasn't single.

"elvis my boy!! elvis is in the building!!" george exclaimed as austin arrived, wearing a black suit blazer. his blonde hair was styled in a way that looked messy, but accentuated his curls. and his eyes had oceans again, overflowing with life.

but what got you was his smile. he looked genuinely happy, embracing george into a tight hug. something george wasn't used to since he was always the one initiating, but he was all for it.

and for the first time, you doubted yourself and your theory. maybe cassandra was right.

maybe he really was okay.

austin went around to evelyn, who soon grew fond of him as her little cooking mentee. austin learning dinner dishes to desserts from all the classes he attended.

"the food smells lovely evelyn," his lower tone enveloped your heart and you hated how much he really did affect you. evelyn thanked him for his kind compliment.

"austin come and sit, the table is already made." cassandra offered the chair next to you and you panicked once more.

"hi again," his voice was smooth as he maneuvered his way around you to sit at the chair on your left. something about his tone and the way he held himself now felt like he was a stranger to you. like the guy you met before wasn't him at all.

or maybe a part of you saw him as broken and thought that you could be the one to fix him.

but your heart still stuck to that possibility. that this was all a front somehow. but you had no real reason to follow that thought. all you had was that pull on your heart.

"i like your suit," you gave him a weak smile as he thanked you kindly, pressing against the little wrinkled areas and loosening his jacket and tie.

"i just came back from dropping my girlfriend off at the airport so... i'm all yours for two weeks." he exclaimed, leaning back in his chair. your heart fluttered when he said that, but you knew it wasn't what he really meant.

evelyn and george placed the food on the table, a beautiful dinner feast for all of you. cassandra followed suit with the rest of the desserts as george popped up from his chair, running to get something.

"we forgot the wine!" he screamed from the hallway, hobbling back with two bottles. he eagerly poured an outrageous amount of wine in everyone's glass, left standing to offer a toast.

"to our new friend elvis," his toothy grin wide and proud as everyone raised their glass too. austin getting flustered as he tried to turn down the compliment, but evelyn insisted.

"and to my first cooking mentee, who i am so proud of," evelyn added, squeezing austin's cheeks. he laughed and you weren't sure why that sound hurt you.

you were the last to raise your glass as everyone cheered.

something about him being a part of the group should be celebrated, but you didn't know why it felt so painful. why him being a part of your life was hurting you.

or why him being happy killed you.

maybe because you wanted to be a part of that in his life, but knowing you couldn't be.

by the time you were done flooding yourself with all your conflicting thoughts, the dinner ended and all that was left was the chocolate cake in the center of the table. and you, picking at the icing with your fork.

you didn't remember anyone saying goodbye though, which made you feel even worse. you weren't exactly sure how much wine you drank either, considering your glass was empty. but you could've sworn it was full just a few minutes ago.

and then you saw him, coming back to your table. his blazer long gone and just his white dress shirt underneath. he looked disheveled but in a good way. something that showed he had a good time with his friends, which he did. he just wasn't sure if he remembered all of it.

"you want to bring the cake upstairs?" his voice felt like a blanket around you.

you looked at him with such confusion because... why would a kitchen have an upstairs?

"upstairs? why am i going upstairs?"

"because you need to go to bed."

"but i don't want to go to your apartment."

and his cheeks flushed red at your firm decision, feeling suddenly embarrassed for what you assumed. he did offer his arms for you to hold onto though, but you were hesitant to take it.

"i'm taking you back to your bed."

you sat there quietly, like you were debating whether or not to trust him. but you couldn't feel your legs so you had no other choice. and he smiled at you as you sat there and contemplated.

it wasn't long until he made the first move, wrapping his arm around your waist to hold you up while the other hand made sure you draped your arm around his shoulder. it felt like you were floating off the ground, either you were so far gone now or he was a lot taller than you thought.

when you reached the elevator, he struggled with keeping you upright, multiple failed attempts along the way of you falling forward, which made him almost lose his balance. it was like trying to walk without knowing where to go and not feeling the ground beneath you.

austin finally made it to your door as he tried to fumble through your bag for your key, while you nodded off for a split second. he kept one hand on your head, placing you as close to his chest as possible so you wouldn't fall over again, which made you blush immensely. your arms limply fell around his neck and he didn't mind at all, not even reacting to the way you fit right into the crook of his neck. your face surrounded by the smell of his cologne and little wavy pieces of his hair. you wished you could stay here forever.

"you smell really nice austin..." your words slurring with wine in your breathe. "can i have your cologne?"

"of course you can."

he couldn't help but laugh, which felt like a sympathy in your ears.

he finally found your key, opening the door for you. he slowly let you move first as he followed suit, trying to hold on to the sliver of soberness he had left in him.

it wasn't until you saw your living room that you excitedly left the comfort of his arms and screamed at your furniture.

"oh my gosh... YOU HAVE THE SAME APARTMENT AS ME!!" you squealed, turning back around to pull him into a hug, almost knocking him back outside. he held you for a moment, convincing himself that this was the alcohol talking.

this was just the wine.

"we're in your apartment love," he remarked and you let go all of a sudden and he felt the emptiness with it.

"oh."

your voice sounded so heartbroken that he almost felt bad for smiling at you.

"then why are you in my apartment?"

"because i need to make sure you get to bed okay." the alcohol still wavering a bit in his balance as he tried to maneuver you towards what he assumed was your bedroom. and he assumed correctly.

"i can do it on my own." you protested, finding your bed covers. you felt the softness of your blanket before you collapsed onto the bed, letting out a long awaited sigh. your eyes closed as you tried to ignore him. him and your overly excited heart.

"do you want to change first?"

you perked your head up and suddenly felt the room spinning. you were adament in saying yes, but you couldn't move your legs again.

"go away. i can do it by myself." you whined, slowly getting up and then collapsing on the floor, giggling.

austin just looked at you, holding in a laugh. you tried to push him out of your room and it actually worked, but only because he fell over outside.

"and you stay outside until i'm done." you ordered, your voice stern but slurred.

getting dressed drunk was probably one of the most difficult tasks you had to do at this very moment. and you haven't drank like this since college so you were mixing which part of your shirt was meant for your arm and your head.

by the time you finally had yourself dressed, you opened the door to see austin lying on the ground. his eyes closed, sound asleep.

"austin..." you whispered, crouching over him. the alcohol making you see double for a moment before using the floor to ground you. "austin, you can't sleep here."

he fluttered his eyes open as he gazed back at you. oceans engulfing you in endless waves. his hair all messy now as he just looked at you with such intrigue. it was so inviting.

he was so inviting.

you could've done anything, but you couldn't. you knew you couldn't.

but he was just laying there, gazing up at you like he's never seen you before. like he was seeing you for the first time all over again.

you wanted to caress his cheek, play with his hair, tell him he could stay.

but you couldn't.

it broke your heart that you couldn't have him. that he was with someone else.

you mustered enough courage, enough strength for the both of you, and whispered ever so softly to him.

"thank you for taking care of me..." your words blending into each other, feeling as if you were so far away from him.

and without thinking, you let your hand fall on his cheek, moving the little strands of hair that fell onto his face. like it was something natural that you've done for years.

and he closed his eyes to your touch.

you started to tear up, pulling everything you had left in you just to smile at him. that somehow he needed reassurance for your heartbreak.

"your girlfriend is so unbelievably lucky to have you austin," your voice breaking at the end, wanting to so desperately do something. do anything.

but all you did was collapse on the floor next to him, your body feeling limp from all the alcohol. he hardly moved from where he was, your words sinking slowly into his chest.

the weight of everything settling into him.

and for the first time, you were the reason why his oceans went dry.

[daytaker]

The Gang React to Weed

Happy 4/20, here's a thing.

(I'm imagining that demons have the same reactions to weed that humans do. I don't think they actually would have the same reactions, but theoretically...)

Oh, and to make my own bias clear: I'm not a fan, personally. I can't think about weed without thinking about the smell. The stink. So I'm not sure if the focus on the smell in these comes off as weird or not, but it's so powerful in my mind, it must be addressed.

Lucifer hates weed. Don't call that the Devil's lettuce, he wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. It smells like skunk. It's revolting. Don't use it in his house. Don't use it in his presence. Don't use it. It's antithetical to everything he believes in.

Mammon...would stone. I see him as someone who uses one of those vape pens on the DL (not nearly as smelly, so much safer to use in the House of Lamentation) but he'd also like gummies and weed brownies. Being stoned is just fun. It's pleasant. It's relaxing. Chill out, Lucifer, you're harshing the vibes, man.

Leviathan is nervous about weed. He has this idea that there's a way he's supposed to react to cannabis, and when he doesn't, he feels like there's something wrong with him. He's supposed to feel all chill and groovy, right? So why does he just feel dizzy? Why is he not relaxed? Why isn't he chill?! Why isn't he groovy?!?!?! He probably psyches himself out too much to enjoy it. He's too nervous about the social expectations.

Satan is kind of ambivalent to weed. He doesn't particularly enjoy it. I don't think he'd like feeling intoxicated in general because of the lack of control. But at the same time.... it pisses Lucifer off so much, how can he not appreciate that? He doesn't like the smell either, so if it wasn't for Lucifer, he'd be the one complaining about it, but as it stands, he's perfectly willing to enable his brothers who do like it.

Asmodeus doesn't mind it in moderation, and only in edibles. Again... the smell. He will not tolerate smelling like anything less than a bouquet of roses. He only really uses it socially.

Beelzebub can't have cannabis. And I know you know why. The cravings. You can't just take gluttony and make it hungrier. It Devours. Once, Mammon left some weed brownies unattended, and he was strung up by Lucifer for days, not because he brought pot into the house, but because Beelzebub ate them and went on a mindless rampage through the Devildom, eating his way through various businesses and even a few historic landmarks. Everything was game: stone, dirt, wood, you name it. The bottomless pit just became bottomless-er.

Belphegor likes it. Similar to Mammon, he doesn't want the hassle of Lucifer getting on his case, so he prefers the vape pen, since it's less smelly and also Beel-safe. It makes him feel cozy and relaxed, because if Belphie needs anything, it's something to help him fall asleep more easily.

Diavolo loves it! But since Lucifer hates it, he doesn't use it very often. I actually imagine he and Solomon occasionally hang out and smoke. Only very rarely, because he's much too busy to be fucking off with some tricksy wizard and getting high, but it happens from time to time.

Barbatos is indifferent to it. What's some intoxication in the face of millions of years of experiences and virtual omniscience? It won't affect him. But please, young master, if you must indulge, change your clothes after. The scent has a way of clinging to fabric...

Solomon loves weed! It's so fun. What a great way to take the edge off. Mind-altering substances are very fun for a guy who's seen it all, even if cannabis is relatively lowkey. When he senses that the moment is right, he'll whisk Diavolo away every now and then and hang out in some scenic location while smoking. He has a fantasy that one day, Diavolo will spontaneously suggest they make a pact during such an occasion. It hasn't happened yet.

Simeon isn't interested in getting high. It's not for him, or for any angels, really. I wish I had a more nuanced picture of him for this prompt, but I'm just picturing a meme with Simeon's face saying "Don't get high: get saved."

Luke is a literal child.

"What's that awful smell, Simeon?"

"Oh, that's just some Devil-grass burning. Some demons enjoy the sensations inhaling the smoke causes."

"Demons would like something like that!"

[gilbirda]

what are your thoughts on watcher’s new announcement?

So.

I've been watching the Boys since they started back in 2016 (i think around that era), and honestly I'm very conflicted about the decision. I've read so much stuff in favor and against the announcement and I don't know if my answer will satisfy you.

I have managed a community and I have the blessing and curse of being somewhat of a Name, experiencing the ordeal of being Known, and I can tell you that 1)you can never please everyone 2)people will always rush to crush you the second you do something they don't agree with 3)people will always twist everything you do with the worst faith in mind and 4)fandom forget very quickly that at the end of the day you are just human.

I think they made a calculated risk based on a purely economical viewpoint. I think they considered their loyal fanbase and how willing people have been so far with spending extra cash to support them — The live shows, the exclusive streams (like the Valentine's Too Many Spirits) and Patreon. How much of their fanbase was the "broke students" tumblr claim they are and how much was people with spending money willing to pay extra for them.

I also think that the decision seem stupid if you look at it from the perspective of "why the hell would I pay $6 to watch such little variety of content?" and that's a Correct Assumption, but Observe — they have been very slowly pulling everyone that made Buzzfeed famous and enrolling them in. Very recently they gathered the Worth It boys, the second show that kind of carried Buzzfeed back in the day (apart from the Try Guys). I think they can't talk about it right now, but the goal is to relaunch Buzzfeed but without ads and without making it the soulless content machine it became. I think their dream and goal has always been making what Buzzfeed could have been with better management, kind of like "If I was the Management in this company, things would have been better" dream fulfillment. That's why they made the direct jump to a streaming service instead of the logical steps of Patreon-exclusive content or even jumping to Nebula like other youtubers. It was never meant to stay one single channel, it was supposed to be bigger.

Is the projection of making a "better Buzzfeed" worth risking this step? Time will tell. I don't know. I personally never cared about anyone except Buzzfeed Unsolved. I still watch Unsolved on repeat. Is my comfort show. Maybe they are overestimating how much people care about other shows not hosted by them.

Although they did hint that "we want shows not hosted by us". This tells me that they are settling down, they want to ramp down a little bit, do the hook with Ghost Files aka Unsolved Supernatural Lite for the streaming service, and once people are hooked, launch more shows by the old-school Buzzfeed people. Won't be as big as a show hosted by Shane and Ryan, but it will still make people feel like they are getting their money's worth.

I would forgive all of this if only they didn't use the excuse of "if we want to do Netflix-level productions we need money". I'm sorry but that means nothing to me. We loved them when it was a powerpoint slide show with 2 idiots in a set. We didn't fall in love with the toys or the trips or the high tech. We didn't fall in love with the fancy animations at the beginning of Ghost Files episodes that they are so proud of. That was all their idea.

I've seen this trend of content creators ramping up their creations to an unsustainable point, completely crash and burn and then having to apologize about having to step back. Then making it the moral trap of an argument that they have been doing their best to bring quality content to their audience, and of course making it impossible to argue against. If you speak up and say "well we never asked you to break your back" then you are ungrateful audience. That's exactly what's going on in here with the Watcher announcement — "true fans" criticizing people who point out the fact that they created this money problem on their own. Is not the fanbase responsibility to cater to a company's bad money decisions. Is not our fault that they decide to scale up their operation to a point they "haven't been making a profit for 2 years". It's unfair that the fans are at each other's throats for daring stepping back and saying "I don't want to be part of this".

I don't think Watcher Entertainment is actively wanting to collapse their fandom like this. I don't think this was a calculated move. But I do think that they are a group of adults trying to make a career of something they enjoy doing. I think they made this move with the perspective that fandom is not end all and they can always rebuild it.

— And that they are planning on making a machine that can work without them, and that requires breaking something in the fans, it requires kicking themselves out of the pedestal fans have put them on. They know they won't be allowed to have a normal life until people stop looking at them waiting for them to say their phrase.

In conclusion I think they made a choice that made sense if they are planning on separating Watcher Entertainment from "The Ghoul Boys" fame, and it makes sense if they are aiming at something bigger than what they've been doing now. Money of course is the goal and the reason presented, but there's a lot that they are not saying and we will not know until it happens.

Until then, it does feel like they have just shot their careers in the foot.

Also I'm salty that I can't join the service because I'm outside the US.

[howlingday]

It's kind of depressing when you realize out of Team RWBY, Weiss is the only one who get's constant development. Ruby doesn't get any character development until maybe Vol 4, and it was still sporadic at best. Yang and Blake got some good development up until Vol 7 where it feels like if it didn't involve Bumblee, then they didn't get anything (And in some cases you could argue going backwards...). So, this might be my bias talking (Weiss is best girl), but Weiss is the only one on that team to me that got anything in a constant enough rate. Only time I think she didn't develop was in Vol 9, but that was Ruby's time to shine so I'm not really upset with that one.

Yeah, when you think about it, there really wasn't much character development for any of the supposed "main characters" of the series, especially since they're also the titular characters.

Ruby's character development was like a David Cage game of Beyond: Two Souls, showing us Ruby's highs, lows, lows, lows, and LOWS of her character development, all before circling back to a HIGH just in time for her series to get canned. It's a sad sight.

Blake's character was centralized on the White Fang. She was in the White Fang until she left, then she finds out the White Fang are up to something in Vale to the point that it exhausts her, then she helps stop the White Fang in Vale and Mountain Glenn, then Yang was framed, and Blake thinks she's becoming Adam again, then the White Fang attack Beacon and Adam cripples Yang so she runs away to Menagerie to protect Yang and everyone she knows and learns the White Fang are up to something in Menagerie until she breaks everything up in Haven. Things go right for Blake overall until Adam shows back up and she and Yang murder him with no consequences. It is from this point that Blake's character arc with the White Fang ends and her entire character now becomes Yang's girlfriend. I've said it before and I'll say it again; Blake is the worst girl of Team RWBY.

Yang's character trait is that she has no character trait. None that's ever properly established. She's Ruby's sister and/or mother figure, but hardly interacts with her. She likes to party and get into fights, but we don't see her do either. Her mom is a bandit, but we don't know if Raven really loves Yang or not. She lost her arm to Adam, but she didn't really learn anything from that whole experience; again, nothing that we can see. And now Yang's character is Blake's girlfriend. I put Yang higher than Blake only because what story COULD be told isn't just the same story over and over.

So, now that I've gone over some issues of the others, let's talk about Weiss' character arc. Weiss is physically scarred by a trial set by her father in order to get into Beacon, and once she arrives, she's an uptight spoiled brat who expects to be handed the position of Team Leader. After she's humbled by Professor Port, she steps up as Ruby's second-in-command. She's pursued romantically by Jaune, whom she rejects outright multiple times until Neptune shows up, whom she romantically pursues until he starts flirting with other girls in front of her, though Jaune helps Neptune ask her to dance, and from there she and Jaune are on better terms as friends (which can be seen in V3 when he calls Weiss after getting out of the locker Pyrrha shoved him in). During V3, she's approached by her sister and financially cut off by her father. After the Fall of Beacon, she's forced to return home and is basically put in a sort of Brittney Spears house arrest, where she's only allowed out by her father to do whatever he wants her to do (I think that's what happened, I'm not really aware of what exactly happened during the whole "conservative house-arrest" thing from a few years back), until she escapes and is then captured by Raven until she's rescued by Yang. They then go to Haven and reunite with Ruby and Team JNR, and once Blake comes back, Team RWBY is back in full swing!

Okay, I think that's enough to make the point, but I do want to bring up something that is going to piss people off, because of course it will. It's about Weiss' likely endgame ship, White Knight. I said before that RWBY doesn't know how to do romance, but... Looking at the character developments of both Jaune and Weiss and they just somehow start leaning closer and closer, contrary to how they started out. Like, I know I'm not the only one seeing two characters with full-developed characters starting to get closer, so how is it that BMBLB sucks so hard with their story if it's the canon flagship?

Don't believe me? Think about what I was talking about with these characters. Do you know what the biggest difference is between the stories of Weiss and Blake and Yang? The answer is that Weiss actually has a story. Blake and Yang just are just... two halves of one whole. Weiss is completely independent of Jaune, and yet they both managed to grow without each other. I'm no relationship expert, but if you're relying on another person to have a character arc, that's not a healthy relationship- That's codependency.

Oh, but what do I know? I'm just an idiot on the internet who makes incorrect quote posts. My opinion is invalid and should be tossed out and disregarded. Tata~!

[al1v3-p03ts-s0ci3ty]

One shot idea: Neil (or Todd) admitting to the other that they like them

(THIS TOOK SO LONG IM SO SORRY-)

Thank you so much for the ask!!! I haven't written much lately so this was a nice start! This ideas been sitting in my notes app for a while so thank you for getting me to finally write it!!

[Authors note! This is set in the 90s. There are mentions of Welton but just imagine that the timeline got shifted up a bit. They're all in their mid 20s. Also the cat name Allen IS based off of that super cool fruity poet Allen Ginsberg.]

Cramped in a small apartment full of boxes that seemed to pile to the ceiling, Neil and Charlie sat on the scratchy carpet of their new home.

They'd spent their whole morning moving box after box from the U-Haul truck, up 3 flights of stairs and finally into their apartment.

"Once we're done moving all this stuff maybe we could have a housewarming?" Neil said, taking big breaths between words. Both Neil and Charlie were completely exhausted from carrying things around all day.

"Maybe we could get the guys to do all the unpacking for us." Charlie joked, although there was a hint of seriousness in his voice.

Neil chuckled at his friends joke and a short silence followed.

"Do you think it was the right thing to do?" Neil's voice was quiet.

"What?"

"To move out, I mean... I know it's for the best and I should just move on..."

There was a pause. "But?" His friend chuckled sort of awkwardly trying to break the tension.

"I'm just gonna miss him." Neil responded, his tone was completely genuine and if you listened carefully you could hear his voice break.

Of course, they were talking about their friend Todd.

Neil and Todd had been inseparable since the day they met in Welton Academy. They spent every waking moment in each others company, they shared a room together, they had classes together, they went to Dead Poets meetings together.

Now, Neil had developed a crush on Todd during this time, and as much as he'd like to say "it's not a big deal" or "it was just a small crush" he'd be lying.

After a long talk with Charlie about his feelings for Todd they both decided that maybe he should move out. He'd spent a long time living with Todd, maybe it was time for a change?

"Well of course you're gonna miss him! You've been in love with him since the day you two met, that's not gonna be easy to get over-" Charlie wasn't even able to finish his thought before Neil cut him off.

"I'm not in love I just-" He couldn't possibly sound more defensive if he tried.

"Look, Neil." There was a short pause before Charlie spoke again, he needed to think of the right words. "You wanna get over him, right?"

"Yeah..."

"Then you're gonna spend some time apart from him..." He turned to face his friend. "If I'm being honest... I always just assumed he felt the same way about you."

"Don't do that, Char."

"Hey, I'm just being honest." Charlie's words came out in an unusually transparent tone.

/////

Finally, they had their place set up. Their apartment had an open floorplan with a small living room and kitchen that was separated by a short bar and stools. There was a hall that connected their bedrooms and bathroom to the living room.

A small couch, coffee table, tv. They tried to make it as homely as possible given that they'd only lived there for a few days. And it worked for the most part.

"When are they supposed to be here?" Charlie asked from behind the kitchen bar, he was watching the packet of popcorn turn in the microwave.

Neil glanced towards the clock they hung above the front door, it was 6pm. "Around now... Maybe they're just running late?"

And then, almost comically, someone knocked the door. Charlie seemed unphased by the sound and made no effort to answer the door. He was such a great host.

Neil pulled the door open. There was already a smile already plastered on his face before he saw his friend's.

They hugged then exchanged greetings and complimented the pair on the new apartment despite the fact that they barely had time to properly decorate, there were still a few boxes here and there.

"Hey." Todd was the last one in the room. Everyone else had gone into the living room and were making themselves at home. But for now it was just Neil and Todd in the doorway.

"Hey..."

There was chatter coming from the living room but the sound seemed fuzzy from where the pair were standing in the hall. Neil definitely wasn't paying attention, especially with Todd right in front of him.

"Oh!" Todd rummaged through his tote bag and pulled out a book, it had post it tabs sticking out the sides as though it had been annotated. "Here." He handed the book to Neil.

"Thanks..." Neil takes the book in his hands and glanced down at it for a moment.

"I forgot to give it back to you after I borrowed it, and then... Well you moved out..."

It was a small copy of The Great Gatsby, ironically though Neil related to the main character as they both had friends in their lives that they had sort of a 'gay yearning' for. Though, neither of them would ever really admit it.

"It was good!" He began. "It was really good." Although Todd was obviously excited to talk about the book, he still spoke in his usual quiet voice. "Daisy was my favourite character by far."

"I knew you'd love her." Neil said, glancing back up at Todd from the book with a smile on his face.

Now that the other boys had settled into the apartment they were, rather loudly, discussing what they should do together.

"Monopoly?" Pitts asked.

Charlie shook his head. "No way, Pittsie."

"Why not?"

"It's too basic. We should play a more exciting game...hmmm."

Neil lightheartedly rolled his eyes before making his own way into the room with Todd. 'Typical Charlie.' He thought. It was obvious Charlie knew what he wanted to play yet he was making everyone wait, he was so dramatic. 'Maybe he should join the theatre.'

Then, suddenly, Charlie's face lit up. "Twister!"

/////

After a too long game of Twister and a few rounds of Uno, Todd was exhausted. Beside him on the couch was Neil, it took everything in him to not lean against his friend and rest his head on his shoulder.

The group was laughing about something, Todd couldn't tell what exactly it was, he was just so tired. The only thing on his mind at this point (beside Neil) was going home and getting some sleep.

God knows what the time was by now. His eyelids were heavy and he had to stop himself from leaning back against the couch and passing out. Neil noticed, obviously.

"You doing okay?" He whispered. His voice was barely audible in comparison to the other boys.

All Todd could do was nod.

"Tired?" There was a sweet smile on Neil's lips.

That smile... Todd could feel his cheeks getting warm. He nodded again. "Just a little..." He replied with a yawn.

Neil's laugh was the sweetest sounding thing you could ever dream of hearing... Or at least that's what Todd thought. "Just a little? You look like you're gonna fall asleep."

Todd lazily shakes his head, earning another laugh from Neil

"You can stay the night if you want... That might be easier than taking the bus."

"Really?" Why did Todd sound so surprised? Of course Neil would let him stay the night, he wouldn't make Todd take the bus alone, especially so late.

"Of course!" Neil smiled wide.

/////

Once the other boys had left and the only remaining people in the apartment were Charlie, Neil and Todd, Neil gave his friend a tour of the new apartment. It didn't take long as the apartment was relatively small and Todd had already been there for a few hours, however, he did like humouring Neil. He was always so theatrical.

"This is where you'll be staying." He said while mimicking some kind of fancy host, it made Todd laugh.

The room was small but cosy nonetheless. Theatre posters in frames lined the walls, he had a vanity that he used as a desk and there was a strip of photo booth pictures of Todd and Neil tucked between the mirror and the frame. Todd tried so hard to seem unphased by it, though his rosy cheeks gave him away.

He had a bookshelf that was more than full already, the middle of the shelves were sagging under the weight of the many, many plays and novels he owned.

Of course there was a box or two in the corner, Neil hadn't had time to move many of his smaller things into the room yet.

"You sure I can stay the night in here?"

"Don't be ridiculous, of course you can."

Neil left the room to give Todd some privacy as he got changed. Todd couldn't help but look around at the room. He was so used to all these things being in Neil's room- 'his old room.' Todd corrected himself- in their apartment, but now they were here.

He put on his fluffy pyjama pants and an old loose shirt before he made himself comfortable on Neil's bed.

Soon after, Neil came into the room wearing different clothes, clothes that Todd had seen him wear before. Now he was getting nostalgic, Neil had only moved out a week ago.

"Hey!" Neil said. 'He looks so cute when he smiles.' Todd thought.

"Hey..." Todd replied in a whisper.

"You comfortable?" Neil joked. "You can sleep there, I'll be on the couch."

"What?" Todd sounded offended on the behalf of his friend.

"What?"

"You can't sleep on the couch, Neil- this is your room. Y-you should sleep in here."

Neil shook his head. "You're my guest. You should have the bed."

"But it's your apartment."

Neil was still stood in the doorway and Todd was still sat on the bed. Suddenly the energy in the room shifted, like there was something lingering under the surface of their conversation, something important and unspoken.

"Well you're already on the bed, Todd." Neil chuckled. Quickly though, Todd got up, stumbling a little at the speed at which he stood.

"Neil, I'm not letting you sleep on the couch."

"Well I guess we'll both just have to sleep on the couch then." Neil joked, though Todd didn't laugh, and just like that the air was tense.

"I'm not letting you sleep on the couch."

There was another pause between the two and they were both facing each other directly now.

"Then... I guess we'll just have to share the bed." Neil suggested, mostly joking. Key word being 'mostly'.

"Yeah..." Todd replied, his voice came out soft and quiet. "M-maybe we will..."

It's not like this would be the first time they shared a bed. Some of those nights at Welton got cold and those blankets were barely enough to shield one person from the temperature. Besides, it's not like anything was going to happen...

/////

Todd sat comfortably at the head of Neil's bed, the pillows and cushions had been distributed between the two and they had propped them up behind them like makeshift backrests. Their hushed laughter filled the room.

"You're kidding." Neil said, in a playful tone.

Todd shook his head and even though he was still laughing he spoke with complete certainty. "I'm not."

"Allen really misses me?" Neil sounded somewhat surprised. Even though they had adopted the cat together some time ago it still surprised him that their cat could miss him.

"Of course he does."

"Well I guess if he misses me so much then I'll just have to move back in." Although he was being sarcastic, there was a trace of truth in his voice. Maybe he would have to move back in for their cat... And no other reason.

Todd let out a brief chuckle. The apartment was a lot quieter now and it was nearing the early hours of the morning and they had to keep their voices down. "So you'd move back in for the cat but not for me?" He joked but he still managed to sound somewhat offended.

"Oh come on..." Neil paused and took a moment to look up at Todd from across the other side of his bed. "You know I'd do anything for you, Todd."

Todd averted his gaze, he'd rather look anywhere else than look at Neil right now. He could feel his cheeks heat up, maybe he could just blame it on the temperature of the room, maybe Neil wouldn't even notice. Todd wanted to change the subject, he didn't want to talk about Neil being gone anymore, but he just couldn't get it off his mind.

"It's weird not having you around the apartment anymore..."

"It's only been a week." Todd could practically hear the smile on Neil's face, he was always smiling about something or another when they were together.

"Well... It's been a long week."

Now this was silence. Not exactly awkward or even anxious, but something else. Something remained between the two of them.

"Your room’s nice." Todd finally deflected the conversation onto something else, something easy to talk about.

"I-" Neil began. He could read Todd, and if he was going to change a conversation topic it must've been for a good reason. "You think so?"

"It's... Very you."

Neil chuckled. "I kinda figured that it's always been 'very me'. It is still all my stuff after all."

"Right- no- yeah-... You know what I mean." Todd shook his head, he was laughing with Neil now.

"I get what you're saying. It is a little different." Neil glanced around his room as if it had been the first time he's ever seen it. He began mentally nitpicking at the changes he'd made.

"Oh?"

"Well for one," he started, "that huge cat scratching post isn't in here anymore."

"Yeah..." Todd looked around now too, he was picking up on the subtle things that were different about the room that used to be so familiar to him, silently missing the things that Neil had left in his old room.

"It's different without Allen, that's for sure, it's quiet." He chuckled. "And it's different without you constantly being in here-"

"I wasn't constant..."

Neil playfully rolled his eyes at his friend's disagreement. "It sooo was." Todd only responded by shaking his head with a disbelieving look on his face. "You were in my room all the time."

"Well... It'll be good to have this new space, right? And I'll have the apartment to myself." Todd was more talking to himself than talking to Neil, almost like he was trying to convince himself that Neil moving out was going to be good for them.

"I'll miss you being in here so often... It'll be so quiet."

"You're living with Charlie, it's definitely not gonna be quiet." Both boys laughed to themselves. It's like the world outside this room had stopped and they were the only two people in the world.

"Yeah." He continued to laugh. "I guess you're right."

"It might be a good change of pace?"

"Maybe..." Neil only half agreed. "I'll miss the quiet though... I'll miss you."

Their eyes met and Todds heart skipped a beat. "I'll miss you too..."

The room went quiet again. "We should probably get some sleep." He said awkwardly, breaking the tension. Now it was Neil who was deflecting and trying to change the subject. He got off the bed and started haphazardly moving the pillows and adjusting the sheet beneath them, not necessarily doing anything but just trying to make himself look busy.

"Neil...?"

Neil felt his world stop for Todd in that moment.

"Yeah?"

"Did... Did I d-do something wrong?" Todd asked, his voice was quiet, almost like he didn't want Neil to hear him.

"What?"

"To make you want to move out... Did I do something wrong?"

Neil shook his head profusely. "No way. Todd you're the best roommate anyone could ask for."

There was a pause, Todd wasn't sure if he should leave the conversation there or not, but he was curious.

Finally, he asked. "Then what was it?" It was inevitable that Todd would ask Neil this question sooner or later.

Neil sighed, he had to make up something. "I thought it would be better to get out of the apartment, ya know?"

But Todd just looked up at him from the bed, unmoving. It was obvious that Todd didn't believe him.

"I thought it might help me..." Neil took a deep breath as if he was bracing himself. "I didn't want anything to come between us." He said about as much as he could without giving himself away.

Todd shook his head. "What do you mean?"

"It's just..." He sighed. How could he possibly explain this? "It's not a big deal."

"Then why can't you tell me?"

The air was thick and the pauses they took between talking felt like eternities.

"I didn't want anything to change between us, that's all." Now it was Neil who had turned his gaze away from Todd.

"Why would anything change?"

"I kind of..." He took another deep breath, his lungs filled with the cold night air that poured through his half open window. "Had a small... Crush on you while we were living together." He barely even glanced at Todd after he said this, he wished he could read Todd and tell just how he felt.

He had about a million questions for Neil but all he could manage to choke out was-

"W-what?"

"It was just a small crush really, it was barely anything." He stuttered and stumbled over each word, with every sentence he let out he felt like he was letting out more and more that he couldn't take back.

"You... You m-moved out because you had a crush on me?"

"Yeah...." He nodded briefly before turning to Todd.

"But... you only moved out a week ago..."

The brunette nodded. He felt like there was a lump in his throat and a pit in his stomach.

"D-do you still... Feel like... That?"

Neil let out an awkward chuckle. "I guess so, yeah."

"You moved out to get over me?" Todd was still somewhat smiling, like he didn't believe it was true.

"Yeah." He nodded. Neil was a lot calmer now that it was out in the open. He thought this would've gone a lot worse than it did.

Todd let out a sigh of relief, which Neil immediately noticed.

He scanned Todd for any sign of discomfort or anger, though he didn't pick up on any. The only other time he'd felt this anxious was when his father showed up unexpectedly in the audience of a play he was in. But he'd rather not think about that.

"What?" Now that he was at ease he could finally do something besides just stand there and look anxious.

Todd dismissed the question by shaking his head, although he was still smiling. "It's just..." He lowered his voice. "I-I've gotten that advice before."

Neil just gave him a confused look.

"Meeks... He thought I should've m-moved out when I... Told him I liked you."

Neil went speechless, his mind was racing. It all made sense now, thinking back to all the times he even considered that Todd felt the same way about him. It all made sense.

"What?" Neil choked out as his lips formed a smile.

Todd reciprocated his smile. "Just before you moved out..."

The two boys shared a glance and the room seemed to shrink, pulling them closer together.

"Really?"

"...yeah."

"Charlie had his suspicions." Neil joked. He tried keeping the conversation light hearted, he knew that Todd didn't hold up well under stress.

"I thought it was so obvious-" Todd mumbled, he hid his face in his hands.

In hindsight it was incredibly obvious. It was ridiculous that they had no idea that the other had feelings for them until now.

"I... I guess I just never noticed before." Neil sat back down in his original position on the bed. "I thought I was the obvious one." He laughed.

"Really?" Todd's voice came out like a mouse, he peeked at Neil from behind his hands.

"Oh yeah!" He nodded reassuringly. "Remember all the valentines' I made you?"

"Oh my God-" The shorter boy covered his face with his hands again, embarrassed, his face flushed red. "I had no idea."

"Really? No idea?"

Todd silently shook his head in response.

Neil hadn't noticed his cheeks heating up until he saw himself in the mirror. His face was bright red and there was a sweet smile on his face. He never even dreamed that this day would come. Not only was he able to confess to the love of his life, but to hear Todd say in his own words that he reciprocated those feelings, it just meant the world to him. Maybe this was the beginning of something new?

Carpe Diem.

[hell-drabbles]

Hello, I'm back again with more writing! Your newest drabbles with Lucifer have been giving me brainrot again. I love how you portrayed the relationship between Lucifer and the Companion and it was so satisfying seeing Ra-On jealous. Well, now he's gonna get more of that in the future. Don't take people for granted Raon! For now I'm focused on the Companion and their relationships with Lucifer and the rest of Paradise Lost.

I tried to make the Companion as genderneutral as I can, but they do get called sister. Sibling just doesn't sound the same and I wanted to discern them a bit so I didn't make them be called brother.

Some gore coming up again and a bit angst, but this time the main-part is comfort! The Companion deserves all the affection and rest after having to deal with everyones bs and their entire being remade because of angelification. The characters are probably ooc, but I needed the fluff of Companion being taken care of like they deserve😌

They are still getting used to their head being silent now, of that holy light that had previously blinded them from what is right before them being gone. Well, not truly silent but the ringing choir of the adoring angels that had been blasting in their mind has lowered until it's a barely there murmur, as long as they don't focus on it they can't hear those beckoning words. And they can actually see what is in front of them again, not that painful light that had burned into their pupils even when they closed their eyes, though everything is still fuzzy with the light.

Their body also still feels strange, wrong. At first it was those damn wings that sprouted from their back that they had ripped out themselves and the halo floating over their head and now it's the pair of horns sprouting from their forehead and a tail growing from their backside. It hurts, having grown new bones and new limbs that weren't supposed to be there in the first place, damn it. But it's preferable being one of the demons than still being a lapdog to those damned Seraphim. While their memories are still scrambled and trying to remember anything specific is like wading through mud hurtpainagonythusiswrongmakeitstop, they do remember enough to know they'll take off those angel-fuckers heads when they get the chance. Noone gets to manipulate them like that, use them to hurt their friends.

They clench their hands, digging their clawed fingers that have been previously stroking the tuft of fur at the tip of their tail into their palms and easily piercing the soft skin with those razor-sharp claw-tips. Their tail whips around and the stumps of what remained of their wings twitch, responding to their anger and indignation. That too is new. Their emotions seem almost amplified now, much easier rising and ebbing like the sea. They almost feel like they're back in their teenage-years where their puberty made them a wreck, though they had much better control of themselves than their human friends. They remember what is was like watching Raon and Mhinyeok, it was like seeing a trainwreck happening right in front of you.

"Sister, is everything alright?" A kind voice interrupts their train of thought.

Ah. They got lost in their head again. They shake their head and blink rapidly, trying to ground themselves in the present again.

Their eyes focus on Morax as their tail settles besides their legs on top of the blanket and the wing-stumps stop moving.

"Sorry." They rasp out, their voice quiet and hoarse.

"It's alright. You are still recovering, after all. We're only sorry that our healing can't do more for you, sister." Buer cuts in, gently uncurling their fingers from their palms and observing the damage they did to themselves. Again.

Off to the side, Marbas clicks his tongue.

"Your recovery progress is much slower than expected, sister. Even Gamigin couldn't do much. Some of the wounds will probably always remain and never truly heal, like his majesties Lucifer's."

He almost sounds apologetic.

Their eyes flick to Luicfer at the reminder, who has been silently observing as the other three did the check-up on them, unwrapping the bloody bandages across their body, evaluating their wounds and re-wrapping them with new bandages that won't stay clean for long.

As if almost on cue, Gamigin comes bustling through the door, carrying a tray with a bowl of steaming soup and a glass of tea and a tonic that's supposed to help speed up recovery.

"Your meal, sister!" The dragon grins, the bells of the staff on his back ringing which each step as he puts the tray across their lap.

"Too loud, Gamigin" Morax scolds.

"Too noisy, Gamigin" Marbas grumbles right after.

"Too much noise, Gamigin" Buer also says.

They can't help but smile at the exchange and feel guilty at the same time. They are investing so much time and care and resources in them and it's been weeks and they still can barely stand, let alone walk without help. At least the burns healed, but the stumps of their wings and the large wound on their chest will most likely never stop bleeding, judging from the example they have. They will always be in pain for the eternity their unnatural life will span now that they are a devil.

"Eat." Lucifer reminds them quietly, stopping them from getting lost in their mind again.

"Right." They blink again, shaking their head. Ah, it's frustrating! Why can't their focus just stay on the thing they want it to, instead of jumping and trailing all over the place? Morax, Marbas and Buer already said it's natural, that it will get better as both their body and mind heal and settle into their new form as a fallen angel- as a demon. They do their best to believe them and ignore the feeling of wrongwrongwrong- this isn't how their body is supposed to be-

to ignore that they sometimes can barely supress the urge to scratch at their skin and break off the horns and rip out their tail- get frustrated with their slow progress.

They lift their shaking hands and grab the spoon in a weak grip, barely able to dip it into the bowl and lift it even an inch again before it slips from their fingers and drop back into the bowl, a few drops splattering out on the blanket and on their skin.

"Fuck!" They curse, frustrated by their own weakness.

The others spring into action, Buer lifting the tray from their lap while Morax pulls away the stained blanket and Gamigin quickly daps up the hot soup that spilled on them with a hankerchief he got from who-knows-where.

"It's fine, sister. You're still recovering. You fell from Heaven, burned alive and broke a lot of your bones when you crashed in Hell. It's a wonder you're still alive." Marbas speaks to calm me down while the others bustle around. Morax leaves with the dirty blanket and returns with a new one, Buer putting the tray on the nightstand besides the bed safely as Gamigin makes sure they're cleaned up before tucking the now stained hankerchief away.

"You're right. But I still feel useless, like a burden." They admit.

"Not a burden." Lucifer speaks quietly but firm.

"Yes! We want to do this for you, sister! You can rely on us." Gamigin pipes up afterwards.

They're so kind to them. They were the ones who found them, took them with them to Paradise Lost and made them apart of their little family, taking care of them and still trying their best to nurse them back to health and help them settle in their new body. They can let themselves be vunerable with them without having to fear they will use their weakness against them. They are not used to it, to their care and how they adress them like family. They were always the one taking care of others, not the one being cared for.

"Thank you." They choke out feeling suddenly emotional, a lone tear trailing down their cheek.

"Don't cry." Lucifer says, stepping forward and gently wiping the tear away from their cheek.

He sits down on the side of the bed, taking the tray and settling it across his own lap, taking the spoon and dipping it in the soup before lifting the spoon to their lips. They blink, surprised by the action before opening their lips and leaning forward, taking the spoonful and swallowing.

"It's good." They murmur before Lucifer already is lifting the next spoonful to their mouth.

They eat their entire meal like that, Lucifer feeding them spoonful by spoonful until all the soup is gone, then helping them lift the small glassbottle of the healthtonic to their lips until they drank all of it and then helpimg them drink from the glass of water to wash away the bitter taste while the other four watch. After their meal is finished, Gamigin steps forward and takes the tray, bringing it away.

They wait until Gamigin returns before they ask the questiln that has been resting on their tongue for days now.

"Do you think I've healed enough to tell the others? Can I have visitors now?" They ask.

Paradise Lost kept it secret that they found them after they fell and turned into a demon, worried that they wouldn't be able to hold on because of the state they were in. They were more concerned that they would be able to rest and heal in peace, and they all knew they wouldn't be able to do that with Raon and their entourage of other demons bothering them. Apparently it wasn't too hard as the angels have become more aggressive in their attacks since they fell, especially those damned Seraphim so the other kings and nobles were kept busy. From what the Healers described, it sounded almost like they were searching for something with increasing desperation. Well, that's not their problem to worry about currently.

Marbas sighs. "While we would prefer to keep it a secret a bit longer, your body should be able to handle it. We are a bit more worried about your mind, your memory. They will have questions that could be triggering. Will you be able to handle that, sister?" He questions.

Oh. They hadn't thought about that. They were more concerned with seeing Raon again, making sure he didn't get hurt without them there to protect him.

"Yes, I'll be fine."They supress the flicker of doubt in their chest as they answer.

"Only a short visit under supervision." Lucifer says, eyes narrowing.

"Okay." They agree. They learnt early in their stay that going against what the five of them said often was only to their own detriment.

And it's comforting to know that they have somebody on their side in this Hell, that somebody will think of them and their health first instead of Raon. They felt a bit guilty at the thought, but also reveled in it.

Now they need to prepare themselves for the onslaught that will soon be upon them.

The others decided it would be best for the meeting/visit/questioning to happen in the Greenhouse instead of the room they occupy. They still need some sun and it wouldn't do for them to feel cornered in the space that's supposed to be their safe resting place, after all. Somewhere where they can leave and retreat if it gets too much.

Lucifer had carried them there, gently setting them down on the polstered chair, Morax bringing a blanket and laying it across their lap do they don't get cold. The others helped them get clothed properly, though "properly" also isn't quite right. They're in a very loose sleeveless shirt that has a very large backwindow for the stumps of their wings. They aren't wearing any pants, but they do have underwear on at least. They're thankful that the shirt is long enough that it falls mid-thigh and with the blanket the others won't see their bandaged but otherwise bare legs.

"It wouldn't do to worsen your wounds just for that. We are still in Hell." Buer had reasoned after they had winced even when only attempting to try pulling on a pair of very loose sleeppants.

And now the six of them are waiting for Raon and the other four kings to arrive. It had been decided that only those five would be welcomed as to not overwhelm them. They were also told that reason that was given to the Kings and Raon for them to come was kept vague but enough to make sure they know it's urgent and that they need to come.

Buer had poured tea for them and Lucifer, but had stepped back and blended back into the greenery, like Marbas is also doing. Only they and Lucifer are seated, while Gamigin stands almost protectively at their back. Morax will be the one to guide their guests in.

They hear the door open, several voices speaking at once. They subconsciously reach out and grip one of Lucifer's hands in their own.

Any moment now they'll see them. They can feel their heart loudly thumping in their chest as they remind themselves to breathe.

I stopped here because I ran out of steam, but I imagine it went something like Raon and the other Kings come in,switch pov to Raon, who is are shocked and surprised to see them alive and as a demon, Raon questions them/wants them to come back with them to one of the other kingdoms since they're "fine" and push the Companion too far to the point they get triggered into reliving painful memories they supressed and have a panic-attack, hurting themselves in the progress. This is the point where Lucifer steps in and makes Raon shut up while Marbas and Buer make themselves known to get the Companion to calm down and Morax and Gamigin step inbetween to act as like a wall so that Raon and the other kings can't get closer to the panicking Companion.

This is then the point that Raon gets jealous/hurt because A) Why don't the Healers care for them like that and B) The Companion is their friend, why are they so close to somebody else besides them. Lucifer had enough and forces the others to leave, picking up Companion bridal-style while they cling to him and hide from Raon and carrying them off.

I haven't really thought further tbh.

I hope you liked it, let me know what you thought!

(Hehehe this was certainly a fun one to read. I really love that my writings are making people write to me more and more. It's fun! Dragging people into my things! I wanted to keep this thing in my inbox for as long as I could, but also, I'm pretty slow when it comes to replying to anything because I like being careful and replying in such a way that doesn't imply that I'm apathetic to anyone. Though, next time, I do recommend using Sibling next time, even if it seems awkward to you. The more you use it, the less awkward it becomes. Kinda like using the word partner rather than using girlfriend or boyfriend. Anyways, I'm glad that you had a lot of fun with this.)

(Oh and honestly, I have no clue as to what the Companion's new appearance would be since I'm not very good at visual design. All I know is that they don't have a heartbeat and they're in a pretty delicate balance of sorts so they do risk reverting back to that weird angelic state given how parasitic that state of being was to them. It's like a stubborn tick, I suppose. Anyways, here be my own writing reply.)

He grabbed your hand. That was all it took. He rushed forward, grabbed your hand and cradled it between his palms. Many, many times he reached out to you back when your wings were these parasitic things flopping uselessly on your back. And, many, many times, he missed because he couldn't grip hard enough, couldn't hold you long enough.

Always. You were always taken away from him by those angels, towards that blinding light of heaven.

But, here you are, in front of him, dressed lightly and comfortably covered with a blanket that was of a quality higher than Ra-on has ever seen. Sure this means you're healing, right?

…grabbing your hand was all it took. He felt your skin, cold and stiff. He felt your veins on the back of your hand, hard and unmoving.

You had no heartbeat.

Knuckles knocked under his chin, Ra-on biting almost through the tip of his tongue as he was sent right into the waiting arms of all his lovers. Blood flowed into his mouth. Ra-on curled into himself when fire spread over the nerves of his tongue, covering his lips like that'll protect him from the pain. He couldn't help the tears, but, more than anything, the worst pain came from his heart as he looked to you and your blank, far away stare.

"Sorry," your limbs awkwardly moved, as though your joints were unyielding to you as you clenched your hand close to you, "Sorry, I'm fine I just… just give me a moment. A minute to," you gripped head, then dug your fingers right into your ear, "get them to shut up."

A light. Small, broken little fractals of lights dusted and flowed right behind your head, as though wanting to come into existence, but can't. Your ripped out stubs fluttered and twitched, you hissed in a breath and practically heaved it out.

"You…" Ra-on finally swallowed his blood, "You lied. You're not fine at all."

This, this isn't normal. Nothing about you was right. For months on end, Ra-on had to fight to keep this hope in his heart alive, that, when you simply vanished from battle, Ra-on had to convince himself that surely you didn't die. That you weren't…discarded.

But, here you are, lucid and away from that brutal dreaming self that wanted to destroy him and everything he's accomplished. Everything that belonged to him. You're here, being cared for, being healed…being vulnerable and weak to them…

…why here? Why did Lucifer hide your presence for this long if you were like this? You shouldn't be here, away from him. When Ra-on was sick as a dog in the hospital, he wanted nothing more than to be surrounded by those closest to them. And, after everything you've suffered, wouldn't you want to have him by your side while you recover?

"It seems the influence of the seed hasn't entirely left their body," there was a sadness in Mammon's eyes, as though feeling guilty for not being able to get rid of it somehow.

Satan held a tight grip on his waist. Leviathan's face held the slightest of frowns. And Beelzebub looked away, grasping his hand.

Ra-on struggled, but eventually separated himself from them. He walked towards you, now surrounded by devils that always paid more attention to you.

Gamigin's hand were wavering around your form, as though unable to decide if he should touch you or not, but the minute Buer shifted to stand in Ra-on's way, Gamigin followed suit.

"Please," Gamigin, usually light and carefree as all dragons should be, held a weight to his presence as he gazed upon Ra-on, "don't come any closer."

"But, they're my friend," Ra-on tried to go around them, but they refuse to let him, "I have to help them, they need-"

They're good people, these devils. They've been so good to you, Ra-on knows this, but why do they refuse to be good to him? Any attempts to befriend them, to get closer to them have always been met with excuses or disinterest.

"They need silence." Soft, a voice worthy of the heavens. Lucifer stood and all was silenced.

The lights that glittered over your head have ceased, your bloodied hand caught in Lucifer's own. Blood oozed over the side of your partially torn face, your eyes twitching. You weren't bleeding as you should. It wasn't flowing out as blood should. It just, oozed.

Lucifer was gentle when he helped you to your wheelchair. He made to touch your hand, perhaps to pat it after adjusting the blanket back on you, but you retracted from Lucifer.

Vulnerable. Ra-on knew how much you hated being in that state, hated being weak in front of anyone even if they have nothing but good and gentle intentions. Whenever you got sick or hurt, you always want to take care of it yourself. Like a wounded animal.

You didn't say a word as Lucifer pushed you out of the room. And all Ra-on could do was watch.

[bluejay-the-geek]

DC characters/moments as Tortured Poets Department songs/lyrics bc i have a light concussion and am very bored (in the album's chronological order)

(disclaimer before someone is triggered- some of the lyrics are taken out of context or interpreted differently than what they actually mean. this is just for fun don't come for me. also this gets pretty angsty towards the end so proceed with caution)

"I was supposed to be sent away, But they forgot to come and get me"- tim drake very obviously bc neglecting parents/boarding school

"I love you, it's ruining my life"- early harleen quinzel about joker

"My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys"- the whole song is just harley quinn idc (pre-harlivy of course)

"Now I'm down bad, cryin' at the gym"- nightwing def cried at the gym at some point

"I stopped tryna make him laugh, stopped tryna drill the safe"- dick grayson about bruce after moving out of wayne manor

"You swore that you loved me, but where were the clues? I died on the altar waitin' for the proof, You sacrificed us to the gods of your bluest days"- remember the whole selena leaving bruce at the alter thing? yeah

"I'd rather burn my whole life down, Than listen to one more second of all this bitchin' and moanin', I'll tell you something 'bout my good name, It's mine alone to disgrace"- I'm just getting red hood vibes from this no specific reason

"Now, pretty baby, I'm runnin' back home to you, Fresh out the slammer, I know who my first call will be to"- almost every gotham rouge to batman right after escaping arkham/prison. especially joker, catwoman and riddler lol

"At the park where we used to sit on children's swings, Wearing imaginary rings"- this one specific panel of tim and steph

"And this city reeks of driving myself crazy"- everyone who's ever been to gotham

"All my girls got their lace and their crimes, And your cheating husband disappeared, well, No one asks any questions here"- it's giving gotham city sirens

"Am I allowed to cry?"- maybe it's just me but i thought about clark kent discovering he had different biological parents and grieving about them even though the parents that actually raised him are alive and well

"So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street, Crash the party like a record scratch as I scream, "Who's afraid of little old me?", You should be" red hood's debut

"The scandal was contained, The bullet had just grazed, At all costs, keep your good name, You don't get to tell me you feel bad"- jason todd about the whole making batman choose between him and joker at the end of under the red hood

"You wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me"- this is 100% Bane bc he was born and grew up in prison for a crime he didn't even do!! also cassandra cain and damian wayne

(^this is actually the lyric that inspired this entire post lol)

"You caged me and then you called me crazy, I am what I am 'cause you trained me, So who's afraid of me? Who's afraid of little old me?"- kind of a stretch but remember that time they put jason in arkham?

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)- again the whole song is harley about joker

"Your arson's match, your somber eyes, And I'll still see it until I die, You're the loss of my life"- bruce about jason. out of all the robins that died, jason's death hit him the hardest. even now when bruce sees red hood, he still sees that happy little kid that he lost

"I can read your mind, "She's having the time of her life", There in her glittering prime, The lights refract sequin stars off her silhouette every night, I can show you lies"- bc we all know Nightwing is always dying on the inside, and it was very true in the discowing era bc it was right after he left the manor

"'Cause I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit"- jason pre-bruce

"I'm so obsessed with him, but he avoids me like the plague"- ok so we got joker about batman, cupid about green arrow, hush about bruce wayne... and a bunch of others but it's too many to write lol

"And you deserve prison, but you won't get time"- fucking tarantula that bitch

"The smallest man who ever lived"- the atom! not any of the messages in the song tho ofc he's just very small

"What if I told you I'm back? The hospital was a drag, Worst sleep that I ever had, I circled you on a map ,I haven't come around in so long, But I'm coming back so strong"- joker to batman after escaping arkham again

"I haven't come around in so long, But I'm making a comeback to where I belong"- jason coming back to protect crime alley after being away from gotham for years after his resurrection

"Even if it's handcuffed, I'm leavin' here with you"- batman and catwoman<3

I Hate It Here- imagine the whole song as homeless jason todd taking shelter in the library💔

"I built a legacy that you can't undo, But when I count the scars, there's a moment of truth, That there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you"- bruce built a legacy as batman, and created a huge family he loves, and it hurts to think about but he wouldn't have any of it if joe chill hadn't murdered his parents

"Please, I've been on my knees, Change the prophecy, Don't want money, Just someone who wants my company"- kid bruce grew up all alone in a huge mansion, but he'd give all his billions away in a heartbeat if he could change his parent's fate

"So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst"- ok so you might think i chose cassandra cain for this only bc of the name, BUT- cass notices things others don't (like cassandra the prophet...), bc of her skills and abilities she is feared the most (Ik the song said "she feared" not "she is feared" but idc lol). like if someone knew so much about you just by looking you'd think she's some kind of a witch too

Peter- picture this: jason had a childhood friend back at crime alley. he left to live in wayne manor and become robin, and said goodbye to his old friend, promising they'd reunite again in the future. 3 years pass and his friend reads an article about jason's death. now listen to the song and try not to cry (if someone writes that fic send me the link IMMEDIATELY this has been haunting me) here's the link to the song with lyrics bc ik you're too lazy to look it up. also jason's middle name is peter:)

"Splendidly selfish, charmingly helpless, Excellent fun 'til you get to know her"- brucie wayne vs batman

"Started with a kiss, "Oh, we must stop meeting like this" But it always ends up with a town car speeding, Out the drive one evening"- catwoman and batman of course<3 the town car is the batmobile speeding out the batcave to catch catwoman (to arrest her or make out with her? probs both)

Robin- ofc we have to go robins for robin! imo that's bruce to dick and jason's robins, and dick to damian when he was his robin. dick and jason- despite the hard times they went through that led to them becoming robins, they were still mostly happy curious kids that run around covered in mud while bruce tried (unsuccessfully) to maintain the innocence they had left. as for damian- it's more of a stretch than the other 2 bc he had no childlike innocence before robin, but dick tried his hardest to extract the child that was hidden inside the ruthless assassin the league created, finally allowing him to experience normal kid things. idk

"He said, "I'm not a donor but, I'd give you my heart if you needed it", She rolled her eyes and said, "You're a professional""-to me this is clark kent completely in love and lois with her sass

"And at last, She knew what the agony had been for"- almost every hero. they suffer, they sacrifice, they fight, and sometimes they want to give up- but at the end of the day, they save lives, so it's all worth it

and that's it folks! feel free to add more/share your insights!!

sorry for any spelling/grammer mistakes, English isn't my first language plus like the title said i had a minor head injury a few days ago and I'm tired soI'm not proofreading this bc I'm going to sleep rn goodnight to all✌️

[mistress-ofmagic]

Around the Realms in 80 days - chapter 22

Pairing: Reader x Loki

Story summary: You have fallen through a portal during the convergence into Asgard and come face to face with Thor, and his brother Loki. With no way to return, you must travel with the two men and their hoard of asgardian soldiers to get back home. Things get from bad to worse when you have to share a tent with the god of mischief himself.

Notes:

Okay I don't know if any of you guys are still out there and still wanting an update for this story but I'm providing one anyway! I really do hope that you're still with me (and if you can't remember what happened that feels like a good time for a re-read right??)

Read this story on a03!

find all parts to this story on Tumblr here:

You’d had better days, you mused. 

Better weeks, months, years…

“If you continue pulling that face it will get stuck and you’ll get wrinkles” Loki chimed behind you. 

You glared up at him, scowling even harder out of spite. 

He grinned down at you.

After Loki’s admission two days ago, his mood had been…interesting. He had stayed beside you in the hospital when he could, but he kept swapping between being distant and being close. 

No real change there then, you thought.

You hadn’t brought the whole being a frost Giant thing up again, despite your thousands of questions in case you pushed him too far and he got annoyed with you and decided to stop visiting. 

Now however, he seemed to be in a good mood although you felt that had more to do with the fact he was currently pushing you around in a wheelchair. 

His eyes had lit up when the nurses had suggested it, despite the fact you felt well enough to walk really and for most of your journey you would just be in the lift anyway. You had protested multiple times but now Loki had got the idea in his head there was really no persuading him otherwise.

“Isn’t this nice?” He asked, too jovial for your liking. 

You put your tongue out and rolled your eyes when you thought he wasn’t looking. 

“I saw that you little chit.” 

He rocked the wheelchair like he was going to tip you out. 

“LOKI!” You yelled, gripping to the sides of your chair. 

The lift attendant had looked pale when you’d first stepped in, and now he looked rather green.

Loki roared with laughter. 

“Oh come on darling, you really think I would throw a vulnerable maiden out of her chair?”

Before having to face that your answer to that question might actually be no and that you knew Loki would never do anything to hurt you, or the fact that this was the third time he had called you darling, the doors of the lift opened onto the floor where you were meeting with Stark and the Avengers. 

Apparently Tony had wanted to wait until you were a bit better before doing a debrief on what had gone down on Muspelheim.

Loki wheeled you down small corridor and into the large meeting room. Like many of the rooms in Stark towers, the windows were completely glass and looking down onto the city below. It was as far as being outside as you had got in the past few days and you stared out, longingly. 

Distracting you slightly from the view, was the Avengers sat around the table. Thor was there of course, as well as Captain America, Natasha and Dr Bruce Banner. A smaller cohort that had welcomed you in when you had first arrived. 

Natasha seemed to assess you with cool eyes, but Bruce shot you a sympathetic look which you felt was a lot to do with the fact you were wearing a very cool and flattering nightie with Shrek’s face all over it as it was the only thing that could fit over your bandages. 

Loki wheeled you into a space that had been left chair-less for you as he took the one next to you. 

Tony gave you a tired smile.

“How you feeling kid?”

“Better thank you. And thank you for the care on your wards too!” 

He brushed you off with a wave of his hand. 

“I suppose I should thank you for saving Rock of Ages life too.” Tony shot Loki a disgruntled look. “He is helping us with this situation after all.” He said, as if he wasn’t particularly happy about it. “Its nice to see you taking your babysitting duties very seriously, although next time I’d appreciate it if you stay away from certain death, he’s not worth it.” 

Loki gave a half shrug, “that’s one thing we agree on.” 

You scowled again. 

“Plus now you are officially hired as a member of my workforce, it reflects badly on me.”

You snorted, “If the babysitter club ever want a new member i’ll be the first in line. And don’t worry, I have no desire to face certain death ever again.” 

Although I would save Loki again, a little voice in your head added that you pushed down into the depths of your subconscious. 

“So, Wonderland’s still with us, but we still no nothing about the current alien threat to Earth.” Stark said gloomily. 

“Well, we found out Surtur’s made some sort of deal with someone to er…cause something.” Thor supplied.

Stark pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Next to nothing then. Natasha?” 

She shrugged. “Nothing at any of the reported sites, no sign of anything coming in or out.” 

“We did learn that they are taking humans for something.” You piped up. 

Everyone stared at you and you immediately regretted speaking at all.

“One of the fire demons told me.” You mumbled.

“Is there no help from your…lot?” Steve asked to Thor. 

“Sadly, Ragnarok is a myth across the other realms too, not just on Midgard. There will be many that don’t take it seriously seriously. And, no one would be bothered enough about a few missing humans to get involved in an intergalactic war.” Loki shrugged. 

Stark scoffed “A few?”

He pulled up a page a hologram of various news stories over the past few weeks, of humans going missing, seemingly vanishing without a trace. 

It was worse than you thought, and it seemed the rates where going up by the day. 

“The fire demon I spoke with, he told me I could go with him, somewhere where they could make me more powerful.” You spoke again. 

Tony and Bruce swapped concerned faces. 

“Did he say anything else?”

“No, not really, just promises of a greater future or something.”

“Well it might not be much but, good work.” Steve said, and flashed you an all American pearly smile and you blushed in spite of yourself.

“Yes, Latte has proved herself to be truly courageous on this trip.” Thor agreed. 

“Oh well, I don’t know about all that.” You murmured feeling your face burn up. It was only an accident anyway that you had found anything out, it’s not like you’d stormed up to a fire demon and demand he speak to you. 

Nevertheless, you were only a few beats away from kicking your feet and giggling but you refrained yourself.

Loki muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like “suck up” and you glared at him, taking a long swig of water to cool yourself down. 

“You reap what you sow kid, I’ll be recruiting you to do further missions with Loki if you’re not careful. Who knew the worlds rudest goth could make friends? And a lowly earthling at that.” Stark challenged.

You tensed. You weren’t really 100% sure if Loki actually did consider you a friend, or if he would take offence at the insinuation. 

But Loki leaned back in his chair, “We are friends, friends with benefits.” 

You choked on your water and it spilled down Shreks face as Thor gave you a pat on the back that nearly sent your lungs through your mouth. 

While you recovered no one knew what to say, Steve and Bruce looked alarmed, you weren’t sure if that was at Lokis statement or the fact you had spat out half a glass of water and Starks mouth was hung wide open, his eyes open comically large, Natasha looked mildly amused.

“Its not…” You said between coughing. “That’s not true…Loki…Loki doesn’t know what that term means…he…he can’t….”

You turned to him.

“Where did you even hear that being said?” You spluttered. 

He narrowed his eyes at you. 

“You deny that we are friends in front of Stark and his goonies?”

“I’m not denying were friends Loki, I’m denying were friends with benefits. That doesn’t mean what you think it does it means something really specific on Earth. What…What benefits does our friendship bring?”

Loki shuffled in his seat “Well…you have taught me how to use a midgardian communication device and I have taught you…”

You cut him off “Great, expect thats not what friends with benefits means here it means…” You blushed heavily again. 

“It means friends who…” you tried again. 

Loki was watching you carefully with an eyebrow raised, the corner of his mouth starting to twitch and your uncomfortableness.

“Friends who fuck.” Natasha finished off helpfully. 

You felt your face grow even redder if that were possible. 

“Ah.” Loki said, in a measured tone although you thought you noticed a very light blush across his pale complexion. “I understand now that that might have been misleading.” 

“Well thank God we cleared that up.” Stark sighed, “I thought we were going to have to admit you to the psych ward instead of the burns ward.”

You stared down to avoid eye contact with Loki, feeling a bit awkward. 

“What’s the plan?” Steve asked. 

“Asgardians?” Stark aimed at Thor.

“We won’t get anything more information from Surtur…”

“The people of this planet are disappearing! Into thin air! And some Alien thingies are the culprit! How can I be the protector of the human race if I don’t even have any leads!” Stark yelled. 

Thor and Steve swapped looks. 

“There might be more information we can gather across the other realms” Thor shrugged, “If the true enemy behind this is thought not to be human then they could potentially come from another Realm.”

“We would have no idea where to start though, it’s not like the nine realms are a small area to cover.” Loki argued. 

“Doctor Foster does a lot of research into the nine realms, will she have any information for us?” Tony asked Thor hopefully.

“I…I can ask her to see what she has found.” Thor placated. 

“In the meantime, we have our best scientists searching the skies for any sign of alien invasions.” Bruce added. “Tony I’m sure we will find something, we’ve got people going to sites where people have disappeared and looking into traces and signals that have been left behind, something is bound to flag up. And the researchers will keep monitoring the fire demons.”

Stark sighed. And you got a feeling that until this thing was settled he was never be satisfied, knowing the people of Earth were in danger. 

“Meeting adjourned or whatever… I need a fucking drink.” 

                                                                         ***

“13 down, 7 letters, a drawing intended to explain how something happens.” 

“Diagram?” 

Oliver nodded, writing it down. 

“Okay… 5 across, 5 letters, spaghetti for example that’s got to be pasta…what about this one, 8 letters, endurance.”

“Stamina? No wait, that’s only 7…patience?” 

“Yeah, has to be.” 

It was the day after Starks meeting. Loki had wheeled you back into your hospital room after the meeting and then he’d had to then leave pretty sharpish, stating he had something he needed to do although you wondered if he still felt awkward about the whole friends with benefits thing. Then again, you wondered if Loki ever really felt awkward about anything, or if he was immune to embarrassment.

After the meeting you had been so damn tired that by the time he’d wheeled you back you’d been nearly asleep. The meeting was the most you had done since the attack and it had exhausted you. 

Plus you were still pretty drowsy from all the pain medication you were on. You’d expected him to call over a nurse but instead he’d actually gotten you the medication you needed and then to your extreme surprise, he’d picked you up from your chair bridal style and put you into bed. 

You were almost too sleepy to have noticed what was going on, but shockingly you were certain he had left a featherlight kiss on your forehead before he left. 

Maybe you had imagined it in your sleepy state, after all he hadn’t been in to see you today.

The nurse had visited today and checked you over, changing your bandages. She had assured you your burns were healing nicely, and Loki’s fast thinking of applying his cold skin to your stomach and chest had saved most of your skin resulting in you only needing a smallish emergency skin graft.  

You’d also been joined by Oliver, who had come prepared for the nurses recommendation of resting as much as possible by providing cross-words. 

“You’re pretty good at these.” He gave his lopsided grin. 

“Symptoms of a misguided youth I’m afraid. I might not have gone to Harvard but I am pretty nifty with a crossword.” 

“Harvard’s overrated.”

“Alright for you to say Mr Ivy League.”

Oliver chuckled. “Wait this is a cryptic one, it says ‘to tantalise the left is a plant.’

“Huh? Wait let me see.”

Oliver stood up from the chair and brought the book over to you. He perched himself on the edge of your hospital bed and you moved over to give him more room.

“Do you need any more medication?” Oliver suddenly asked. 

“I should be good thank you.” You smiled at him. 

Man he was so sweet. Loki had done the same thing yesterday but still. It was nice to have someone else here who cared about you. 

You caught his blue eyes. He had nice looking eyes you noticed, but they missed the tint of green you were used to seeing in Loki’s eyes. 

Actually, why where you thinking about Lokis eyes at all?

Oliver placing his hand over yours on the bed brought you back to the present moment. 

“I was thinking, maybe when you’re feeling better I could take you….”

Before Oliver could finish his sentence, the door to your room opened and Loki strode in. 

Loki took in your close proximity to Oliver, and the fact you were holding hands and his eyes narrowed. 

There was a moment of awkward silence, and for some reason your natural instinct was to jump back sheepishly from Oliver. Despite having no reason at all to feel guilt, you still felt…something.

“I had come to see how you were faring, but I see you have company already.” Those blue/green eyes you had just been thinking about were harsher than you had seen them in a while. 

“We were just doing cross words.” You said, lamely. 

Instead of keeping your mouth shut you continued like an imbecile. “Erm were stuck on a cryptic one if you wanted to help…”

“And intrude on this…personal moment.” He sneered.

“That wasn’t…I mean we were just…” You started and then sat up further in bed, trying to look authoritative, which was harder than you might think for someone attached to an IV drip. “Actually I don’t have to explain myself to you.” 

“Oh, I see.” His voice was cold, and it felt like the room got colder too.

“What do you see?”

Loki ignored you.

“Get out.” He directed at Oliver. 

Your temper started to rise.

“Hey, he doesn’t have to leave we were in the middle of something.”

“Look, um maybe I should just go.” Oliver spoke up squeezing your hand before standing up. 

“I’ll leave the book here for you for when you get bored. I hope you feel better, I’ll come visit again soon and bring some more stuff.” He gave you a quick kiss on the cheek. 

Kudos to Oliver, he walked past Loki out of the room without crying or screaming.

After he had left, Loki breezed into the room and arranged the flowers at the table at the bottom of the table like he hadn’t just yelled at your friend to leave. 

“Dude what is wrong with you?” You directed at Loki. “I am allowed to have friends!”

He rolled his eyes. 

“He clearly wants to be more than friends.”

You made a funny noise in the back of your throat. You wouldn’t be totally against Oliver having more than friendly feelings, a distraction from these insane feelings for Loki that keep creeping up out of no where might be a good thing, right? 

Not that you had any feelings for Loki, obviously.

Loki studied you closely before clearing his throat. 

“Are you and this mortal…friends with benefits?” 

“Loki!” You glared at him.

His facial expression remained calm as he continued staring at you.

“I’m simply asking."

“No! No, God I wish you had never learnt what that term meant. Also I am sleeping next to you every night where would I find the time?”

“Yes, you are aren’t you.” He said, too smugly for your liking. 

“Although I do have every right to explore…you know, that side of things with someone if I want to.” 

His eyes narrowed again, and stood up taller.

“We are in the middle of a crisis here. Is now the right time to be engaging in a dalliance?” 

“You can’t be serious!” You said indignantly. 

“I’m being very serious!”  He matched your tone. 

"Are you giving me a lecture right now on my love life?” When he didn’t say anything you continued. 

“You don’t even care about humans, why are you even bothered about this crisis suddenly?”

“You’re being ridiculous, you can’t seriously mean to engage with this… mere mortal. ” 

“I’m being ridiculous? You’re being ridiculous! In case you forgot, I happen to be a mere mortal too!”

Loki kind of did look taken a back for a second, as if he had actually forgotten that. 

“What I get up to is not even any of your business.” You told him

“Fine.” He sneered, walking towards the door.

“Fine!” You shouted back. 

He slammed the door behind him as you threw your puzzle book at him. 

“Ah!” You screamed to yourself. 

The cheek of that asshole to have a go at you for letting yourself engage in some dating when he was the one that slept with Ylva while you were touring around Asgard. 

You tossed and turned around in your bed, but eventually the drowsiness kicked back in and you managed to fall asleep. 

                                                                     ***

One moment, you were fast asleep, the next moment you heard an explosion. You sat up quickly, disorientated and confused. Another explosion sounded and you got up and ran to the window.

You blinked and blinked again. 

A piece of metal fell seemingly from the sky and you looked up. 

The tower was under attack. 

Notes: I hoped you guys enjoyed this and are still liking the story!!

Taglist:

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@buckybarneslovesteve @evelyn-rathmore 

@Im-a-slut-for-fluff  @jainaeatsstars @mypainischronicbutmyassisiconic

[scribblestatic]

I hope y'all had a good 4/20. Anyway, here's more Sheepzun.

---

Finding his way out of the caves was much easier than going in. The flow of qi seemed easier for him to discern, and his senses were stronger. How curious! He was sure he'd be able to sense predators much easier now.

He cloaked himself in his qi and snuck out the caves, ensuring no one was looking at or for him. This time around, it seemed he had enough qi to do so easier than before, not feeling any pull or strain on his meridians.

He was a right chuffed lad, all things considered!

Shen Yuan made his way back to Qing Jing Peak without much of an issue. Disciples didn't seem to sense his hiding. Those with stronger cultivation did seem to look around, a tad unsettled if anything, but overall, none of them saw through his illusion.

It also helped that he was a prey animal who preferred to not leave things up to risk or chance when being careful was a perfectly reasonable option.

As he travelled, he noticed that the season seemed a little different. A tad on the warmer side than he last remembered. He had entered a few days after spring began, and the flowers he remembered were supposed to bloom seemed to already be at the end of its blooming cycle...

Was it the end of spring? Goodness, time flew!!

Thankfully, not an excessive amount of time passed since, upon making his way out of the forest near the woodshed, Luo Binghe didn't look too much taller. Yes, at the very least, only a few days or weeks had passed.

Hearing Shen Yuan's purposeful rustling, Luo Binghe's slightly pointy ears almost seemed to twitch. Then, he turned around quickly, eyes wide and swiftly becoming watery with unshed tears.

"Shizun!!"

Shen Yuan huffed, amused as the boy, sticky as ever, ran up to him and immediately hugged him around the neck.

"Shizun! Shizun, you came back! Shizun!!"

'Who do you keep calling out for, ah? I'm right here,' Shen Yuan thought.

Luo Binghe went still.

"...Shizun?"

'Yes?'

The boy suddenly let go of him and leaned back, staring right into his eyes. Then, slowly, like the flowers he missed bloom at the start of spring, Luo Binghe's smile spread across his face in a vibrant flourish.

"Shizun!! Shizun, you can talk now?!"

Shen Yuan paused, blinking.

'...You can hear what this one is...saying.'

"Yes, I can! I can finally understand you, Shizun! Has my cultivation gotten better? Is... Is this because of what you taught me?"

I don't know, what the heck?! This is scary!!

So, if he was actually thinking as though he was speaking to Luo Binghe, then the boy would actually hear it? After all, he wasn't responding to his thoughts now. Was this because he taught a spirit creature's Dao to a human that he became Dr. Dolittle? That's an entire genre change!

...Whatever that was supposed to mean! Who even was Dr. Dolittle?!

'...Indeed, it seems likely. However, this one admits that this is the first time he's taught this Dao to a human,' Shen Yuan replies, his mind in utter disarray and panic. 'As much as you are a student, this ram is still learning himself.'

There's no precedent for this! I'm sorry, Binghe! This ram is only about a year old!

Luo Binghe looked as though the meaning of the Dao was explained to him in elementary terms, as though he made a huge mental breakthrough with his words alone.

"I see... Thanking Shizun for his knowledge and education all this time!"

He bowed so respectfully, Shen Yuan immediately felt like a terrible saber-toothed wolf dressed up like a newly born spirit lamb to prey on the little human's trust.

But, well, he was at least somewhat honest just now. He really was also a student in all of this.

'This ram thanks you as well. Even through our language barrier, you've been an exemplary student. Now that we can understand each other more freely, we can further improve your cultivation.'

"Yes, Shizun! I'm looking forward to it!"

Shit.

[More under the cut, this one just got kinda long]

----

Okay, so, it wasn't all that bad.

One, it really was much easier to speak with Bing-lamb, and the boy seemed to flourish further under his his verbal guidance. He didn't really have to say much, though. Whatever Luo Binghe lacked in prowess, he was steadily making up for it in motivation.

All Shen Yuan had to do was correct him a little here and there based on whatever kind of strange animal instinct he had that said,

'This stance is a little off. Keep you knees elastic. Firm, but ready.'

or

'You must connect with your surroundings and hone to your senses. Humans, as predators, rely strongly on their eyes. But you must learn to use your nose, ears, and touch as well.'

"What about taste, Shizun?"

'There are some things a mouth shouldn't touch. We can build up to that as you learn more.'

Though, perhaps he asked such questions because Shen Yuan occasionally found himself chewing on Luo Binghe's clothes. It was more affectionate grooming for the boy than anything, honestly. But he was also a prey creature rather than a human, so it could be excused as such.

Two, after Luo Binghe's lessons with the human instructors, Luo Binghe would sometimes ask him for questions and clarification as he did the pile of chores constantly assigned to him. What was with all these duties, anyway? Weren't all of the disciples supposed to do these things? They were working too hard on purpose, but why?

Anyway, despite not being a human, it turned out Shen Yuan could read quite well. He wasn't sure where he'd learned such a skill, but it was nice to see it be useful. So, because Luo Binghe's questions never got answered in class, as the boy's Shizun, he took it upon himself to do his best to help.

It meant he sometimes had to get a bit creative with how he explained things, but he was doing well enough, it seemed.

Of course, there were limits to what he could do.

As a ram, teaching the four arts was mostly out of the question. Give him some paints and he could maybe bang something out on a canvas, but he had no guarantee it would look like anything useful or recognizable. Same for a guqin or calligraphy.

Go...well, if the pieces and board were big enough, maybe. But anyway, he had his limitations. Not that Luo Binghe seemed to see any of them. With the way Shen Yuan loafed and Luo Binghe sat in front of him, his workbook open, one would think he'd hung the moon.

It was...admittedly very nice to be so appreciated.

Also, getting petted. He'd stopped for a bit after they first spoke, but Luo Binghe did it by accident again later. When Shen Yuan stayed quiet without scolding the action and slightly shifting his head closer, well, he got the picture.

And snacks. Luo Binghe didn't have access to a full kitchen for reasons he didn't understand, but Shen Yuan just knew. The day he had kitchen privileges, it was over for Qing Ding Peak. They'd become Qing Ding Restaurant or something.

Although he still had to be careful, he found he was actually starting to enjoy living the way he was now. He didn't feel the need to look over his shoulder as often, Prey and predator, bridging the gap, huh? What a lovely story.

As Luo Binghe improved, keeping his sheep shizun a secret, several more months passed. Spring turned into summer, into fall, into winter, into spring, into the touches of summer heat once more.

Over that year, Luo Binghe grew taller and broader. His shoulders were starting to fill out, his hands and feet better sized for his body. From his experience working with his shizun's hair-like wool, he learned how to take care of his own hair better, the curls becoming shinier and tamable, no longer as difficult to pull into a ponytail. He also learned all the little nooks and crannies of Qing Jing Peak after going foraging with his shizun, and the mountain climbing and hunting he'd done for himself.

He'd thought his shizun would be against him hunting the birds and other creatures on and around the peak, but though he never partook himself, he was ambivalent.

'You are human. Even sheep eat meat when necessary. For you, it's even more so. This ram shan't fault his student for doing the best for himself.'

And so, with his own hunting skills built up, despite still living and sleeping in the wood shed and lacking some of the more artistic prowess of his sect siblings, he's grown considerably in strength, speed, and build. As he sometimes heard his shizun murmur, 'Born to Bai Zhan, raised to Qing Jing, manages both.'

Meanwhile, Shizun himself...

Luo Binghe had visited Xin Ya Peak before, alongside some of his sect siblings. He'd seen what spirit sheep normally looked like--fluffy, with slightly curved horns, and a nice sheen to their wool. Not particularly tall--mostly reaching around their knees or thighs.

Shizun, however, drew much more regal of a figure. His wool was less fluffy but somehow even softer. He was taller, too, reaching up to the bottom of Luo Binghe's chest. His horns had grown out considerably, to the point they were curling outward. Unlike his farmed comrades, Shizun was exceptionally fastidious. Though, it likely helped he was not locked into a barn or kept around mud. So, he was not only impeccably clean, but he kept a long, undocked tail that swayed behind him with his steps.

He kept his wool a beautiful shade of ivory white. The only discolorations were the slightly green tones that occasionally hung onto his stomach and legs from loafing on the grasses around the bamboo forest and the ever-present blood red huadian on his forehead. Moreover, after Shizun had returned from wherever he'd gone, his eyes had changed. Irises that were once a striking brown had become a soothing blue-green color, much like the peak colors of Qing Jing.

Perhaps spirit animals needed less effort to attain godhood. Luo Binghe could believe it. After all, his shizun appeared like a god nowadays.

'Binghe' he'd hear, his soft and elegant voice calling out to him in the dewy mornings.

He would look up to see his shizun returning from some place he'd found his wild breakfast, leaving him to sleep longer because, as the ram said, he was a growing boy and needed it more.

The sun would peek out at just the right time to shine on his arrival, making him look ethereal, even if he was holding moss in his mouth.

'Have you eaten yet? If not, add this to your food today. It has absorbed quite a bit of yin qi. Considering your yang constitution, it will help promote more internal balance.'

Shizun places the stringy, thick moss in Luo Binghe's waiting hands.

'This is called Qiyan Root, despite not being a root at all. Strain and boil it twice for the best effect. You can also dry some of it for medicinal use. It should taste quite nice in an herbal tea.'

His shizun hummed in consideration as he tilted his head, long white lashes against the fur of his cheeks.

Luo Binghe couldn't help but wonder what his shizun would look like as a human. He was quite the handsome animal, much like one would compliment a horse for its strong physique and beautiful sheen. Surely he'd be a handsome human as well.

Though, wondering such a thing would have to wait. It was time for morning chores, then his lessons could begin in earnest.

It was after one such set of lessons with his other teachers, when he was chopping wood with his shizun at his side that the ram suddenly raised his head with a frown.

"Shizun?"

'...The air feels different. What do you sense?'

Having learned his cultivation mostly from a spirit animal rather than a human, Luo Binghe honed his senses and listened. Indeed, the peak seemed quiet. Too quiet, however.

"Something's not right... Shizun, I'll be back."

'Be careful, Binghe.'

The boy nodded in return before he ran off, Shen Yuan staying behind as he tried to better understand what this energy fluctuation actually was.

Eventually, curiosity and concern won out over wariness, and he concealed himself as he headed toward the rainbow bridges separating Qing Jing from the other peaks.

There, he found several demons cracking away at the bridge between Qing Jing and Qiong Ding. Several were smaller demons with tiny horns and large machetes in their spindly hands. They were accompanied by a larger, more boubous demon in a loincloth, using an axe to slice and wear away at the energies keeping the rainbow bridge connected.

A siege? But this is Cang Qiong, one of the most powerful sects! How could these demons have the gall?!

Shen Yuan wasn't aware of the politics that came with running a peak, so, of course, he was unaware of the peak lord's absence. Several lords were away--more than honestly permissible--leaving the little lamb-like disciples without their guard dogs. Though, judging from the coordinated actions of the demons, the little troupe he was looking at was the least of his worries.

Binghe!!

If he was running this way, then surely he would've encountered the demons! But he could smell no blood or anything from his student. Perhaps he already passed through before they arrived. After all, behind the troupe, he could see several groups of demons destroying the bridges and leaving the peaks isolated...

No, not all the peaks. Qiong Ding.

Something about this scenario struck him as...oddly familiar.

But he shoved that thought aside. Now wasn't the time for excessive questioning! His student was in danger!

As much as he liked to believe he prepared Luo Binghe for combat in some meaningful way, he would never overestimate his teaching abilities. He's a ram for fucks sake, how could he be much better than human teachers and their opposable thumbs?!

Not letting up his concealing qi, he began running across the bridge, heading straight for the small crowd of demons.

Though they couldn't see him, his weight and trotting seemed to alert them as they turned his way. Cruel smirks spread on the imps' faces as they raised their weapons and prepared to strike.

Deciding not to conceal himself anymore, he instead focused his qi on his attack, suddenly appearing before them. For some reason, they seemed surprised despite already preparing to attack him.

His qi-filled horns collided with one of their machetes, causing it to crack and shatter. Milliseconds later, the same cracking and shattering came from the imp's ribs.

Gritting his teeth, he flung his head to the right, throwing several of the imps off the cracking bridge. But he still had some momentum and wasn't done yet.

Facing the bulbous demon and its large axe, he charged up as much as he could, enough that his horns began to glow dimly.

The demon bellowed as it swung the axe, intending to split his skull. But Shen Yuan was faster.

Putting more force in his back legs, he jumped forward, tucking his front legs close to his body. His curved horns rammed against the demon's chest, the bones giving way under it. It let out a choke, then it spit up blood as the wind moved around them.

When the demon fell back, Shen Yuan blinked, realizing he was going butt up.

With a surprised bleat, his legs stretched out as the momentum had him flopping on his back above the demon's head. At least it was on solid ground! Dirt, even!

He wiggled, then quickly got himself up, shaking the dust off his head. Reorienting himself, he realized he was on Qiong Ding Peak. Huh... He didn't think the demon was so close to the land there, but maybe he miscalculated.

Anyway, Binghe!

Worried about his student, he quickly ran off to find where he was, concealing himself behind a cloak of qi once more.

Of course, Shen Yuan missed several things.

For one, the imps and demons had not noticed him at all. What they had noticed were several Qing Jing disciples arriving with their swords drawn.

Secondly, the machetes and axes the demons held were not supposed to crack so easily to a ram's horns. They were made with reinforced metals to be sturdy. A regular spirit sheep would've long lost its horns and skull to them.

Thirdly, the largest demon on the bridge had indeed been standing further away from Qiong Ding Peak, and Shen Yuan hadn't miscalculated. He just didn't realize that his body, weighing over 160 kg (352.7 lbs) plus the force of his qi-powered forward thrust was, even by physics standards, enough to blow a large demon backwards by several meters and shatter their collarbone on impact.

He'd turned his body into a literal battering ram.

Lastly, the Qing Jing disciples, whom the demons actually saw and prepared to fight, were able to witness the entire event, and were now staring, wide-eyed, at the large, mystical, disappearing sheep.

...But those were concerns for the future Shen Yuan.

[scoonsalicious]

you're such a wonderful writer and i hope you are doing great 💖

wanted to ask you, how do you write this type of topics that are hard and difficult? what did you feel while writing for chapter 23, 24 and 25?

i hope to know more about you as a writer and your methods because it has been mind blowing reading Unwanted

Thank you so, so much! I'm doing great! lol

So, I originally started writing an answer to this question that more specifically aligned with what you asked, but the more I thought about it, the more I kind of wanted to delve into what this story was supposed to be, what it turned into, and what it was like creating it. This is probably way more info then you every asked for or expected, so I apologize, but just rewatched Endgame in the name of research and I'm crying like a baby right now, and feeling pretty emotional, lol WARNING: This is going to get heavy. So, Unwanted was never actually supposed to turn into what it was. It started with this really simple image in my brain. Reader (not yet named) undercover, working at a strip club, and Bucky showing up to annoy her and get her flustered. She's unhappy to see him. Why? They used to sleep together, but she hates him now. What happened? In the original story, Bucky and Pocket never fell in love. They were best friends, and became FWB. A new Avenger is recruited (Jade was originally named Sage, and then Jewel, before we got to where we are), and Bucky goes on this Russian mission with her and sleeps with her. He comes back dating Sage and distances himself from Pocket, and she's heart broken, because she feels like she'd just been used, and now that Bucky had a new set of holes to fill (Pocket's words, lol), he didn't need her anymore. Then, she gets assigned to this mission in Atlantic City (that part-- the missing women, the trafficking, was always the plan), and uses it as a chance to get away from him.

But then something IRL happened that actually ended up changing the entire course of the entire fic. A little backstory: When I was a child, I was sexually abused by a neighbor/family friend for many years. I didn't have the language at the time to explain what happened to me, so I never told anyone. I changed, going from a really happy, outgoing kid, to being really withdrawn and anxious; it basically destroyed my soul. This, of course, was back in the early '80s, where CSA wasn't really discussed or understood the way it is now. The signs were there, but my parents didn't know they should have been looking for.

I thought I got over it. I thought I processed and dealt with it and moved beyond it, and I grew into adulthood. But in reality, I was just building a mask. But then, in February of this year, while I'd already been working on the fic for several months under the aforementioned plot, something happened: My young nephew started showing signs that he may have been abused, as well, by either his nanny or someone the nanny had exposed him to. My brother and sister-in-law recognized the changes in him immediately, and did everything right. This triggered me, and it was pretty apparent that I had never processed my trauma-- I'd just repressed it. And everything came rushing back. I suddenly had immense anger toward my parents for failing to protect me, for not seeing the signs, for forcing me to interact with my abuser for years and years. It was misguided, and I recognize that, but I never allowed myself to process the emotions at the time, and was kind of starting over from scratch.

So, Pocket, in a lot of ways, became me. I gave her extremes of what I experienced so she could help me work through things, to help me process everything I was feeling, that sense of abandonment, not being able to trust people, the inability to form real relationships because I don't know how to be vulnerable. And I gave her some of my characteristics: from about ages 15-25, I was addicted on and off to opiates, and in college, I started drinking excessively to numb my pain, to the point where I have liver and kidney damage from it. I gave Pocket my use of humor-as-a-coping mechanism, my penchant for swearing, and most importantly, I gave her my pain, my hurt, so that she and I could get better, together.

So, when I write Pocket's spiral in Chapters 23-25, I'm writing an exaggeration of every spiral I've ever had, because, I figure, if I can get Pocket through all of that, surely I can get myself through my own shit, right?

I'm sure it wasn't the answer you were quite looking for, but it's the best way I can explain how I, and Unwanted got here. And as for my nephew, fortunately, after a State Police and Child Protective Service investigation, it looks like he was never actually sexually abused; for that, at least, I'm grateful.

[arxims]

ANGEL BABY, ANGEL

When a 17 year old teenager, Summon a 'Demon' in order to help him to complete his math homework

Teenager!Jungkook x demon!reader

:- Fluff, minor Jungkook, no romantic relationship, He is the purest soul ever, don't be dumb like Jungkook, demon is not demoning

Word count : 3k

_ Inspired from a character ai bot

Jungkook didn't like math. Nor did he liked homeworks. He despised the idea of homeworks. Why can't teachers do it in class instead of burdening children? That's what he thought when he looked at the brain-eating sequence of numbers and letters in front of him, in the name of a math problem.

Math is a sucker. It really is. Can't even solve their own problems and ask us to solve it. A constant headache

Jungkook let out a sigh and closed his book. Math was just too hard for him Especially calculus and algebra, and he hated having to struggle through the homework. But it didn't look like he had much of a choice. He was stuck with this mind-twisting problem, and he didn't have any clue how to solve it. He wished there was some way to get help, but there was no one around and he didn't want to ask his parents for help either. He's just stuck in this cycle. Forever

Jungkook was a curious kid. A really curious one. His grandmother was the one who fed his curiosity. With stories of Animals, kings and Guardian angels and demons....

Demons…

Jungkook had heard about the dark supernatural creatures before, but he hadn't really believed in them. Like he doesn't believe in guardian angels. They were just stories, he thought. But now that he was desperate and needed help with his math homework, maybe summoning a demon wasn't such a bad idea after all…

The thought of summoning a demon has been in his mind for a while. And this situation seems perfect to help his curiosity of what it would feel like to summon a demon. The demons he heard about were dangerous, evil, bloodlusted demons who feast on souls. But he always wanted to find out whether they exist and if they do, does they actually fit into that description

Jungkook's curiosity was piqued. He knew that demons were supposed to be dangerous, awful creatures, but he couldn't help but wonder if there was more to it than that. Could he really summon a demon? Would it actually help him with his homework? And what would happen if he did manage to summon one?

His doubt number one, which was about the existence of demons, was solved when he found a grown woman appeared out of nowhere in the darkness of the corner of his room, with an intoxicating beauty, tall figure and soft features. ‘Can demons be this beautiful? And soft?’

Jungkook's jaw dropped. A demon! Right here in his room! He had summoned her! He had actually summoned a demon! She was beautiful. And most importantly, she seemed to be willing to help him with his math homework. This was definitely not what he had expected!

"Here we go again" A tone was evident in her voice “Why am i here exactly?”

"Actually, I just need help with my math homework..." Jungkook replied, feeling a little embarrassed about asking for such a trivial thing.

"I'm sorry, what?" She uncrossed her arms and leaned her ear in disbelief to make sure she heard it right.

Jungkook repeated himself, sounding a bit more confident now. "Yeah, I was just wondering if you could help me with my math homework? It's just this one problem that I've been struggling with for a while and I can't seem to figure it out…”

"Ask Google not me" She shook her head in disbelief. It was hard for her to believe that a human summoned her to do his math homework.. For math homework.

"I tried Google already, but I still couldn't figure it out..." Jungkook replied, feeling a little frustrated. "I'm sorry, I know this is a stupid reason to summon a demon, but I'm just really stuck and I don't know what else to do…”

"You know i can gawk your eyeballs out and make you eat them yourself if i want to" She didn't actually mean it. But she played along

Jungkook froze up in fear. He had heard about what demons were capable of, and this one sounded like she wasn't afraid to make an example out of him if he got on her bad side.

"Ok so. What do I get in return? I mostly aim for souls. Or blood" She craned her neck backwards to crack a bone

He gulped as realization set in. He needed to make a deal with the demon. He needed to give her something in return for help with his math homework. But what could he possibly offer that would be of value to a demon? He thought quickly, trying to come up with something…

"I...um...." Jungkook trailed off, feeling hopelessly stuck. He looked around the room frantically, searching for something, anything that he could offer the demon in exchange for help with his math homework. But he had nothing in his room that he thought would be worth anything to a demon, and he knew he couldn't give her his soul or blood. There was just nothing he had that could satisfy her…

"Any time now, Human" Her foot tapped impatiently on the wooden floor and Jungkook was running out of time and options. There was nothing in his room that would be of interest to a demon. His heart sank, realizing that he wouldn't be able to make a deal, and that she would leave him without helping him with his math homework. He was losing hope, until his eye caught something in the corner of the room…

"I have something that might interest you..." Jungkook said as he reached the item and held it up for the demon to see. It was a tiny little object,

As the woman's eyes locked on it, Jungkook held his breath, hoping that he had found the perfect thing…Jungkook held up the tiny object in front of the demon, feeling hopeful. This was his last chance to make a deal, and he had to make it count.

"What is this?" She arched her eyebrow and crossed her arm

Jungkook held up the tiny object in front of the demon, feeling hopeful. This was his last chance to make a deal, and he had to make it count. "It's a soul jar," he said nervously. "It's a magical item that can capture souls. I don't know exactly how it works, but I read about it in one of my books and I think you might be interested in it…”

Jungkook received a laugh in return "You really fell for that shit?"

His heart sank as She laughed at him. He had thought he had found the perfect thing to offer her, and it turned out to be nothing but a joke. "What...what do you mean?" he asked hesitantly. "Don't you want this?”

"Someone scammed you, Human. Souls cannot be contained like that"

"You mean...this thing is not really a soul jar?" Jungkook asked, feeling like a fool. "But...but I read about it in a book..." He trailed off, realizing the truth. It had all been a scam, and he had fallen for it. He felt a sinking feeling of disappointment in his stomach as he looked at the useless item in his hands.

"Ok which book?"

Jungkook stared at her for a moment, trying to recall what book he had read about soul jars in. "Um...I think it was...something about demonic magic?" he replied hesitantly. "I don't remember exactly, but it talked about a demon who captured the souls of humans inside of tiny jars. It said that the demon could use the souls for various things, including increasing their own power…”

She laughed again "How old were you?"

He felt his face flush with embarrassment as he realized how naive he had been. "I think I was around ten or eleven..." he replied, feeling slightly ashamed of himself.

"How old are you now?"

"I'm...um...17..." He replied, avoiding the demon's gaze. He didn't want to admit how long he had believed in that silly story.

"Explains you stupidity. You believe everything you hear right?" She waved her hand

Jungkook flinched as the demon brushed him off so casually. He felt stupid now that he had believed something so ridiculous for so long. "So...what should I do now?" he asked, feeling hopeless. "Do you know any way that I can make a deal with you so that you can help me with my math homework?”

"Sell your soul. Duh" She said it in a matter of fact tone. The boy froze in shock. He couldn't believe the demon's response. Sell his soul? Was that the only way to get help with his homework? After a few moments of hesitation, he finally worked up the courage to ask his next question. "You...you would help me with my math homework if I sold my soul to you?”

"Yes. Of course I can" She gave him a sarcastic smile

Jungkook was speechless for a moment, unable to believe what he was hearing. Would he really sell his soul just to get help with his math homework? The demon was offering him exactly what he needed, but was it really worth it to risk his immortal soul for something so menial? Jungkook thought about the consequences, but the fear of not being able to finish his homework was overwhelming…"Okay, then I'm willing to sell my soul to you in return for your help" Jungkook conceded, his mouth dry with fear. "Just...just please help me with my math homework. And please keep an eye out for the next math problem, because I'm still a little confused about it…”

The Woman started laughing again. Not laughing actually. She was cackling. "All my life I thought humans were smart and then you showed up"

He felt his poor heart sink as the demon laughed at him. He had thought he was making a smart deal, but instead, he had made himself look like a fool. The demon's mockery stung, and he felt a hot flush of anger rising up inside of him. "What's so funny?" he snapped. He refused to let the demon treat him like he was dumb.

"You and your responses are funny. Seriously. I was so bored just watching" She managed to stop her laugh "Who sells their soul for math homework?"

"Someone who's desperate!" Jungkook shouted back. "I don't care what you think about it, I just need help with my homework. So are you going to help me or not?!”

"Oh feisty. What's your name, little human?"

"My name is Jungkook," he replied, trying to sound strong and not let his anger show. "And I'm not a little human. I'm almost 18!”

"Ok Jungkook.. Chill.. Tell me why you're so desperate for a homework problem?" She casually sat on his study desk chair, noticing the open book and the problem which made him struggle

Jungkook was still fuming inside, but he tried to keep his emotions in check and responded calmly to the demon's question. "I'm just really stuck on this math problem, and I've had no luck getting any help from anyone else." He explained, pointing at the book and the problem he had been working on. "I've tried everything, but I just can't seem to get the right answer. And I'm running out of time to finish it.”

"No. I asked why. You're so afraid of it.. Why..”

Jungkook was caught off-guard by the demon's question. "What do you mean, why?" he asked, feeling a little confused. "I'm not afraid of it, I just can't figure it out. It's just too hard for me. I don't know what I'm doing wrong…”

"Your parents pressure you don't they?" She raised a perfectly threaded eyebrow

The boy let out a sigh. "Yeah...they do. They always push me to get good grades in school, and they expect me to get the best marks." He felt a bit embarrassed admitting that, but he couldn't deny it. His parents were strict when it came to academics, and they didn't tolerate failure.

"And you're afraid of failure" She tilted her head

"Well...yeah" Jungkook replied, realizing that there was no point in denying it. He WAS afraid of failure. He had been taught from a young age to always strive for perfection, and anything less was considered unacceptable.

"That's the problem, That IS the problem" She abruptly stood from the chair, snapping her fingers at the boy

Jungkook was suddenly filled with dread when he realized that she was right. His fear of failure was the real problem, the reason why he was so desperate for help with his math homework. Because he couldn't bear to fail, even in something as trivial as math homework.

"Jungkook" her hand rested on his shoulder. "Humans have a problem. They think that the perfect man always wins. But it's a complete bullshit"

After a pause, she started. "I've lived a lot longer than humans . More than ten thousand years. I've seen people. I've witnessed their lives. From birth to death. You know what I learned from all of it?"

The boy's interest piqued to find out what the demon had learned from observing humans for millennia, so he nodded his head and waited for the demon to continue.” Please enlighten me”

"Nothing is perfect. No one is perfect. And a man who always wins isn't perfect either. We learn from failures. It's a universal law. Learn from your mistakes. Try again. And a silly homework isn't gonna end the world. I'm not saying it's not important. But don't let the pressure get in here" She pointed her finger on his head. Her tone was firm but with a soft edge. And her voice was calming him. It gave him a sense of relief

Jungkook couldn't help but smile as he listened to the wise demon's words. Maybe summoning a demon wasn't a bad idea after all.

"You're right...you're right. It's not the end of the world if I fail. I just need to try again. I just need to not let the pressure get to me." He could feel a sense of calmness wash over him as he processed the woman's words.

"You're just seeing yourself small. You're a smart kid, Jungkook" She made him sit on his bed. She could sense the tiredness and exhaustion lingering behind the poor boy's eyes. He is an innocent soul. A pure one. A bearer of a fragile glass heart. People could easily trick him, make him feel weak. And she was glad that he didn't succeed in summoning some being who will make use of his innocence.

It surprised him. how perceptive the demon was. He had always tried to appear strong and confident, but he realized that the demon could somehow see past his facade. He felt like a weight was being lifted off his shoulders. He was indeed tired and exhausted from the constant pressure to perform and excel in everything he did. Maybe a person who could help him get off the expectations and give him advice was all he needed. But he wasn't blessed with such a person. It's a saddening fact.

The ‘Demon’ interrupted the silence "Have you ever heard the saying?.Practice like you never won, perform like you never failed. It makes a little sense if you rethink. Being afraid of failure only makes you get closer to it. It's all in here" She pointed her own head "And you really think you can't figure out a math problem?"

Her insightful words hit him like a ton of bricks. She was right...his fear of failure was what was holding him back. He needed to change his mindset and start viewing his failures as opportunities to learn and improve rather than something to be afraid of. As he thought about her words, the demon's question sunk in too. "Can I really figure it out?" he asked, feeling his hope and confidence swell inside of him. "I can do it...I can figure it out…”

"You can. I know everything." She gave him a playful wink

Jungkook smiled back at the her. She had a way of lifting his spirits, even in the most difficult of situations. "I'm going to figure it out..." he determined. "I'm going to solve that goddamn math problem...and it probably won't be so hard once I'm not so stressed out about it…”

"See. That's my boy." She patted his shoulder "But now you need rest. You haven't slept properly for a while"

Jungkook nodded his head, realizing that he was indeed extremely tired. He had been so stressed out and busy with his homework that he had barely gotten any sleep. "I guess I do need to rest" he conceded, feeling his eyelids getting heavier and heavier.

"Wake up with a clear head tomorrow. And give it a try"

"I will. I really will" Jungkook replied, feeling his eyelids close over his eyes, unable to fight the tiredness any longer."Sleep now " She ruffled his hair as he fell asleep, completely

Jungkook drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep, feeling the soft touch of the demon's hand on his hair. He had been under such intense pressure for so long, and the fatigue was finally catching up to him. As he fell asleep, he smiled contentedly as a wave of relief washed over him. She kept patting his head. He really deserves to be called a good boy. It amazed her that 17 years of his life didn't corrupt him. He worked so hard to make his parents proud and never thought about going in the wrong direction. He earned a visit from her. When she wasn't a being who usually exposed herself infront of humans directly. But he deserved it.

_

Jungkook woke up full of relief and peace the next morning. Soft sunlight easing his mind

Jungkook slowly sat up, feeling his mind clear and calm. His thoughts felt organized and focused, and he felt a sense of positivity filling his heart. The demon's words from the night before had made a profound effect on him. He was ready to tackle his math problem with a fresh perspective, knowing that it wouldn't feel so overwhelming or impossible if he just didn't put so much pressure on himself.He sat on his study desk and opened his notebook. But his math problem..

It was already solved..

Someone has solved it…

It startled him for a moment

He flipped through the notebook, curious to see who had solved it. When he flipped to the middle page, he saw that the solution was written in a handwriting that he recognized. A feeling of confusion and amazement washed over him as he realized…

A white feather, and a note was placed with it. Written in smooth handwriting.

'A small kickstart for you :)

- your demon

Or should I say, guardian angel?'

[aswasforetold]

Ruin - the Amazing Devil

Here it is. After seven months, the last of the paintings are finished. I thought it would take much longer to get through 30 separate 8 x 8 inch paintings.

I'm not entirely sure that my painting has improved all that much since the start, but there have definitely been some style experiments, maybe more of a looseness--it's a lot. But that's it. That's the last album. This one certainly ended up with more contrast and vivid colors.

Who knows what I'll do next?

I'm sure someday there will be another album, and then I might just have to do more.

Until then, I'll get these added to Society6 soon enough, and then it probably won't be too long until I start selling off the paintings themselves.