#I got though so much shit listening to this podcast

[rustyelias]

Chat I am experiencing many emotions about rqg right now /vpos

[wcters]

𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗧 𝗪𝗜𝗧𝗛 𝗔 𝗚𝗜𝗥𝗟𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗗 𝗦𝗧𝗨𝗗𝗬𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗖𝗢𝗦𝗠𝗘𝗧𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗚𝗬

pairing: matt sturniolo x fem!reader

summary: the relationship between matt and a girlfriend in cosmetology school

warnings/notes: established relationship, swearing, nudity innuendos?? they are naked together, kinda went off the cosmetology thing but it’s cute so whtv, a bit short but this is my first time doing preferences

- first . . . he’s totally spoiled

- like really spoiled

- you would practice at home, and then whatever you could on matt

- manicure: hand massages, cuticle cutting, nail painting, hair washing: head massages, shampoo and conditioning his hair

- he would let you practice shaving his beard but it would take awhile for him to let you

- not because he doesn’t trust you, but because he was going through a beard phase

- matt would loveeee the head massages and would get you to do them all the time

- eventually it becomes second nature and so you’ll be cuddling on the couch or outside sitting down with him between your legs and your hand will just find it’s way into his hair

- and you have fake nails so you know it feels reallyyy good

- waxing . . . but he would not admit that he lets you do it

- you ALWAYS smell good

- your shampoo and conditioner, perfume, skin/body care

- nick always asks you what you use for your skin

- sleepovers with nick where you do skincare, face masks, nail painting

- and chris begs to join until nick says yes

- matt always finds you three on nick’s bed watching a movie

- you had been obsessed with makeup your whole life

- def the designated hair braider on your sports team

- BATHS TOGETHER

- bubble bath, candles, you talking about your day and drama and he’ll be listening

- he’s just happy to be there

- studying at his house while you’re watching a movie together or if he’s busy with the podcast

- chris coming up to you and randomly asking you a question about what you’re doing when you’re studying

- “why do you push your cuticles back?” “how do perms work? like how do you do them?”

- it makes you smile because he’s genuinely interested

- will show him some things if you can

- you’re super sweet

- everyone likes you

- you’re a girls girl

- someone needs a pad/tampon? you got it. someone doesn’t want to go somewhere alone? they aren’t because you’re coming with

- you don’t gatekeep skincare or makeup

- always have lip balm on you

- you and matt go to the gym together

- always have a matching top and pants for your workout outfit

- matt just can’t believe you’re his 🤍

- like he looks at you like you hung the moon and stars

- i want to wear his initial on a chain ‘round my neck vibes

- you literally have a necklace with his initial, you walked it with it on and his eyes popped out of his head

- totally share jewelry

- you steal his sweaters, shirts, shorts, boxers, basically anything you can get your hands on

- give matt face massages

- he be lookin’ flawless

- pays for you even though you decline because he knows how much money you use for school stuff

- that shit is expensiveeee

- nick asked you first to help him dye his hair red

- ofc you said yes! he’s your bestie

- played ariana, doja cat, clairo, stuff like that

- #danceparty

- your stuff sort of pops up around the house

- chris will find like a bobbypin or a hair tie on the floor

- smells like you because you bought candles for them that you loved

- thrifting and going to flea markets and getting stuff for your apartment like vases, cups to hold jewelry, etc

- your hair is amazing. everyone’s jealous. i’m jealous.

- no split ends, doesn’t get greasy until at least 5-6 days after you wash it, perfect for styling. also sleep with a bonnet because that does wonders for you

- lashes are amazing as well. it’s because you get them done while at school 😉😉😉

- you drive nick and chris around if matt’s not there or busy

- they literally love you

- think you’re perfect for your brother

- so nice, so sweet, literal angel

- you’ve been on the podcast

- made a tiktok account after matt suggested you do

- blew up. and it’s partly because you don’t gatekeep

- you’re so relatable too, being completely honest about how you feel . . . and are so funny

- “hot take . . . men should shave their armpits. like how do you put deodorant on?” “you ever too lazy to wash your face so all it is is a makeup wipe and a rinse with water? me too.”

- will trim matt’s hair if be wants just a trim

- you first said no, didn’t want to mess up, but he believed in you 🤭🤭

- your biggest supporter

- they would totally be there when you graduate

- cheering loudly when you walk along the stage

- like the pricilla movie scene but with no creepy old men

- you love that movie, hate elvis, but love pricillia

- you sometimes cook for them so they don’t eat out all the time

- you’re a good cook 👩‍🍳

- force them to have some form of vegetables

- his parents love you

- go fishing with jimmy and the boys the one time they do (sorry jimmy but it’s true)

- fans will ask for pictures when you visit matt on tour

- who’s the triplets? they’re here for you

- matt is so proud of you

- if you ever need him to pick you up he’ll bring you food or starbucks so you have energy when you’re done

- is at your beck and call

- ask him to jump off a cliff? he’ll hesitate a bit but will ultimately do it

[astonmartinii]

i don't wanna be funny anymore | daniel ricciardo social media au

pairing: daniel ricciardo x fem podcaster!reader

i don't wanna be funny anymore, i got a too short skirt, maybe i can be the cute one. is there room in the band? i don't need to be the front man, if not then i'll be the biggest fan

based on i don't wanna be funny anymore by lucy dacus (this song speaks to me, i love lucy (she's also AMAZING live))

MASTERLIST | TIPS

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 341,203 others

yourusername: hey girl hey, new ep coming at you fast this friday all about rotting. as the twilight weather rolls in and it becomes the season of all too well, we'll talk about rotting, how we can do it right and how not to lose your mind this october (a cautionary tale, i've already lost mine)

view all comments

user1: my queen hands down five stars already

user2: the bag is so real and the way i know it's a tote that does NOT stay on your shoulder

yourusername: it's the enchante tote, shameless plug for my man

danielricciardo: you singlehandedly sell out my totes every time baby

user3: not this actual fan erasure 🤨

user4: babe be real, she has a massive platform and there was a direct correlation between the first time she plugged a tote and the fact that they sold out that day you guys just love being mean

user5: i'm mean cause i don't want some leech taking credit for dan's hardwork and his fans?

user6: he fucking said it? you guys grasp at straws every time so try and justify your agenda against her

maxverstappen1: idk what rotting is but i'll still listen to every second

yourusername: thanks maxy, though i'd say going on the sim for up to 14 hours of the day is bordering on rotting

maxverstappen1: productive rotting !

yourusername: yes, i guess your sweet little treats are trophies?

maxverstappen1: that would make sense (don't tell my trainer but i do enjoy the little fruity drinks from starbucks)

user7: yall wanna say we're mean but she's literally invalidating max, saying he's rotting on the sim is so invalidating to everything he went through when he was younger

user8: how did we get there? this grasp on straws has to be studied... from a joke about the sim to invalidating abuse?

user9: i honestly thank the lord for dan and max because they're so supportive no matter the shitstorm that yall throw at y/n everyday

user10: literally max is even listening to podcasts... real friends, i hope one day she feels confident enough to come to races

danielricciardo

liked by maxverstappen, georgerussell63 and 1,034,239 others

tagged: yourusername, enchante

danielricciardo: buckle up, enchante is going to the rodeo 🐎

view all comments

user13: i shall be breaking the bank

user14: dan so smart, he looks like a good boyf for including y/n but didn't include her face

user15: yall ever listen to yourself talk, you need to be put in time out for real

yourusername: we all know the phrase, save a horse, ride a...

danielricciardo: daniel?

yourusername: YUP

user16: ugh there are children who are fans of daniel, she's so gross

user17: do you ever get tired of doing all of that mental gymnastics?

yourusername: can't wait for the tote drop for this collection, yall WON'T be disappointed

user18: yes, i will always trust mother's tote recommendations

user19: anyone who carries that much shit knows what makes a good tote

yourusername: this one has survived two dostoevsky book, an unreasonably large water bottle, a laptop and microphone

user19: thank you ma'am

maxverstappen1: real love is dressing as a cowgirl for your needy boyfriend

yourusername: the things we do for love (i actually had so much fun)

user20: here y/n goes doing all the publicity, but never going to races, clearest gold digger attention whore wag of all time

user21: surely a real attention whore would go to every race to get the screen time and papped and all that jazz?

excerpt of y/n y/ln's podcast where she addresses her absences in the paddock.

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 412,349 others

yourusername: life recently lol, the enchante tote is taking a beating

view all comments

user24: she's such a crybaby making dan use up an entire portion of his interview to coddle her

user25: she doesn't come to races cause of people like you invading her privacy and being rude and here you are ... proving her point

danielricciardo: pretty lady i can't wait to be back in your arms

yourusername: waiting outside the airport now

danielricciardo: we haven't even taken off yet babe

yourusername: i know i just miss you and can't wait to see your handsome face

user26: dan must be saying this shit at gun point cause there's no way he actually thinks she's pretty

user27: are you clinically blind? cause we must not be seeing the same girl

maxverstappen1: the aperol rawdogging the bag, you are SO brave

yourusername: living life on the edge, is this that thrill all you drivers talk about?

maxverstappen1: i may drive at over 200 kmh but i'd never risk my tote like that

yourusername: is it worse that i have a jar of olives in there as well, one drop and it's so over for me

maxverstappen1: OLIVES? remind me NOT to hug you when you pick us up

danielricciardo: if you want that hug you gonna have to get in line boy

user28: she picks them up from the airport? that's so cute

user29: someone tell her the gross girl aesthetic isn't cute

user30: babe don't worry no matter the aesthetic you have daniel will never want you x

maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc, christianhorner and 982,344 others

tagged: yourusername, danielricciardo

maxverstappen1: finally went on my bff's (no 1 in the world) podcast after i finally convinced her yall ain't shit - oh and dan was there for emotional support x

view all comments

user31: SO ICONIC

user32: ep on repeat forever, they're so funny

yourusername: for a man who hates podcasts, you were a star i think the memes hit you hard

maxverstappen1: i enjoy the PROFESSIONALS could you imagine doing a podcast with lando

landonorris: why am i catching strays

danielricciardo: i wouldn't say that too loud, i got about 20 texts as soon as you posted this demanding i ask y/n to be on the show

yourusername: oooooooooo the girls are fighting

landonorris: so can i come on?

yourusername: i'm sure we can schedule something

maxverstappen1: don't say i didn't warn you y/n

user33: ugh now she's going to whore around the rest of the grid

user34: for real wasn't dan enough? she's not even pretty enough to whore herself out

user35: you people have no reading comprehension cause you see how dan says yall are insane and yall keep proving him right

danielricciardo: i'm so proud of you pretty girl

yourusername: i love you cowboy

danielricciardo: forever obsessed with you

user36: i'm living for y/n basically telling all these insecure weirdos to fuck off

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, christianhorner and 603,451 others

tagged: danielricciardo

yourusername: who was gonna tell me these cars are loud as shit irl

view all comments

user39: someone tell sky to stop zooming in on her i don't pay to her her ugly ass

user40: cry your heart out bro everyone else is happy

danielricciardo: oops i think you're my lucky charm you now have to come to every race ever sorry not sorry

yourusername: gosh i think that might be true - i'll be there! (but for real you are so so talented and don't need a lucky charm)

danielricciardo: i'm just so happy to share this with you, i love you so much, i'm sorry people have been so cruel

yourusername: people are passionate about you and rightly so, but i appreciate you protecting me baby

user41: imagine being this irrelevant and demanding protection in the paddock ... the audacity

user42: you finally came to the paddock and this is what you wore?

user43: she's wearing danny merch? if she didn't yall would have a problem with that as well so please just be quiet

maxverstappen1: i need you to come every weekend cause you're the only one drunk danny will listen to

yourusername: we had practice with all the wine tasting we did for his wine line

danielricciardo: i am NOT that bad

maxverstappen1: tbf it's usually him just crying about how much he loves you

yourusername: AWWWWWW (i also cry about how much i love you)

user44: gosh this is my favourite f1 couple

user45: hopefully now she has her dose of fame she'll fuck off

user46: HAVE A DAY OFF

danielricciardo

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 1,451,677 others

tagged: yourusername

danielricciardo: as we're nearing our two year anniversary i wanted to say a couple things. one. i love you so much. when you came into my life i was in a bad place and you truly taught me to love myself again and how to love my sport again. you're the most amazing woman ever, the kindest soul and the most beautiful girl ever. two. i am so thankful for the support i have, i do not allow the disrespect some have given y/n. you guys have no real perception of relationships between athletes and fans. you do not have the right to comment on y/n in the way you are. you take extremely low blow and have the gall to confront her in public as well. do not call yourself a fan of mine when you treat the people i love like this. my team will now begin to monitor comment sections and will seek to block and report accounts doing this. thank you and i love you y/n.

comments on this post are turned off.

note: hope yall enjoyed!! i love danny and i saw the danny ric honky tonk this morning and had to write about him. i'd also had this idea for a while but didn't know who to write for lol. please listen to the song i love lucy so much and the song is so relatable xx

also anyone who has requested - i am working on them (but as per some questions in my asks, as for right now i do not write for footballers, if i become less disillusioned with the sport (thanks chelsea) this may change)

[brehaaorgana]

ADHD money/budgeting system I'm currently using for my benefit is going well (I've been using it for like half a year now?), and I wanna recommend it.

You Need a Budget is EXCELLENT. 10/10 do recommend. Uhhh rambling about it and my generic disclaimers + gushing extensively under the cut but TL;DR I think it's great for ADHD ppl, I've used it for 6+ months now and I find it super SUPER helpful. also weirdly fun.

DISCLAIMERS:

Budgeting helps you understand/know your money, it can't make money appear where there is none.

Everyone should learn to budget even if you don't have much money (especially then)

This is NOT a magic trick solution. Just like everything else, it is an assistive tool. This is one of those adult things we can't simply opt out of without negative consequences, though.

My advice is based on something I am currently able to do. That is, I can spend an amount of money on this specific thing that works well for me. If you have no extra money to spend then previously I was tracking things in a notebook. So you can still do this.

I believe Dave Ramsey is a fundie fraud/hack and no one should listen to him about money.

DID YOU KNOW THEY CANCELLED MINT???

Okay? OKAY.

Ahem.

You Need a Budget is EXCELLENT.

It is called YNAB for short. The first 34 days are your free trial, and that is my referral link. If anyone uses it and then signs up for a subscription, we both get a month free. Also you can share a subscription with up to six people (account owner can see everything but individuals can pick and choose what they share amongst each other) so like...idk your whole polycule can be on one account. Or your kids. Whatever.

If you are a student, it's free for a year. If you aren't, a subscription is $99 for a year (paid all at once) or $14.99 monthly, which is equivalent to paying Amazon prime. Go cancel Prime and get this instead tbh.

They got a whole article just on ynab and ADHD. They also have like...a big variety of ways to access their info? They have a book, podcast episodes, YouTube videos, blog posts, q&A's, free live workshops you can join (you can request live captioning), emails they can send (if you want) a wiki, and so on. They got workshops on all kinds of topics!!

So whatever ends up working for your brain. It also has a matching app.

If you lost Mint this year they have a gajillion things for moving from Mint.

Also they have a "got five minutes?" Page which has a slider so you can decide how much attention/time you have before going on lol:

They only have 4 rules of the budget, they're simple and practical, and it doesn't get judgey or like...mean about your spending.

1. Give every dollar a job 2. Embrace your true expenses 3. Roll with the punches 4. Age your money.

THEN THEY BREAK THESE DOWN INTO SMALL STEPS FOR YOU! They even have a printable! Also these rules are great because there's built in expectations that things WILL HAPPEN and it's NOT all or nothing with a fear of total collapse into failure. Reality and The Plan don't always align, especially if you have ADHD. So it's directing our energy towards the true expenses and not clinging to The Plan!! over reality.

You can automate a lot of shit (you can sync with your bank accounts just like mint, but also automate tagging the categories of regular expenses/transactions). And if for whatever reason you accidentally do something that makes the budget look weird or wrong:

A) you can usually fix it somehow OR b) they have like, a button you can press that gives you a clean slate and archives the previous version of the budget for you.

So if you forget for a few weeks or months, or accidentally input something wildly wrong, or just don't want to look at a really terrible month anymore and feel like you need a fresh start you can usually either fix it or start fresh which is really nice.

The app also (for whatever reason) scratches my itch to have things like...have incentives or little game-like goals in a way mint never did? I don't know why. Filling up the bars or putting money into the categories to cover my expenses is satisfying lmao. You can also make a big wish expense category for all the fun shit you want, and fund it whenever you can and then you can see the little bar go up and that's fun.

Anyways I've been using it for like 6+ months now and I think it's really helped me when I use it.

[shitswiftiessay]

Swifties are PAINFULLY fucking stupid.

I shouldn’t be getting THIS heated over a Disney comparison but the Kristoff slander is absolutely fucking wild. Kristoff (at least in the first movie) is both poor and an introvert. Those are two things that swifties HATE Joe for. He also had to work since he was a child, which is something swifties make fun of Joe for- calling him yogurt boy. And he DEFINITELY would think that award shows are stupid.

Hans is much more like Travis in the fact that he pursued a woman for his own gain. Whereas Kristoff was just trying to live his life and didn’t even WANT to get involved in Anna’s shit, Hans wanted to become king, so he pursued Anna (a naive and desperate young woman- which is what swifties are trying to paint Taylor as) and made himself look like her dream guy- “true love.”

Last summer, Travis publicly and relentlessly pursued Taylor with his story about how he tried to give her a friendship bracelet with his number. And he’s been reaping the benefits of dating Taylor Swift, he’s got new TV gigs, his podcast shot up on the charts, and he might even be getting his own reality show.

He tried to pass himself off as a fan, Even though he’s blatantly obvious that he DOESN’T listen to her music. But his little pretend act of being a fan charmed the shit out of swifties and made them believe he was her Prince Charming. All he has to do is that stupid 🫶 thing and he’s got the swifties swooned, much like Hans had Anna swooned from the minute he met her. But his intentions were completely self-serving.

And another thing I find interesting is the fact that Hans proposed to Anna a few hours after meeting her. IF ANYTHING, that couple is literally a lesson on NOT marrying a guy you just met. And yet, Swifties have been talking about Taylor marrying Travis since that first football game-even BEFORE then.

But Joe, the guy who didn’t want to marry taylor, is just like Hans? The one who was in a long term relationship that ultimately didn’t work out is JUST LIKE HANS??

It beggars belief how swifties could be so stupid, because they either didn’t watch the movie, didn’t fully understand it (because they are less cognitively capable than 5 year olds), or they’re so addicted to painting Joe as this cartoonist Disney villain in their heads that they think it’s perfectly reasonable to compare Joe to a character that was trying to KILL his fiancée and her sister.

I the stupidity of comparing Taylor Swift to Anna- a girl who’s been isolated in a castle for most of her life and has ZERO relationship experience - I think she’s supposed to be like 18 or something? Very young and inexperienced and naive. Taylor was 26 years old when she started dating Joe and she had plenty of relationship experience before then.

Taylor literally wrote MASTERMIND, but swifties still see her as this naive and innocent disney princess who is easily manipulated and taken advantage of by men. So I guess they think it’s a reasonable comparison because they understand disney movies as well as they understand Taylor’s lyrics- which is NOT AT ALL.

[derangedanomaly]

hello !! If you don't mind could you do a Bad Sanses + Star Sanses x Fem!Model!Reader who cause a pure chaos in her AU caused the end of her world just because she were bored , like , mass murder , brainwashing , abuse , torture , manipulation , world war and a lot of bad thing in this type , if you don't mind of course !

Hello! I do not mind in the slightest! Enjoy! :D

MASTERLIST

BAD SANSES AND STAR SANSES X CHAOTIC MODEL READER

NIGHTMARE:

You sealed your fate, the moment you decided to act the way you do. He could sense your negativity a mile away.

You're forced against your own will to work for him. (Much like all the others)

You two don't really have much "bonding" time, so the start of your relationship is kinda rocky.

You're actually proving to be very useful for him and the team, so he'll promote you.

Congratulations! You're now working alongside him! How lucky.

(He definitely didn't paired the two of you on purpose. Noo, that's ridiculous!)

He probably won't care that you're a model, at first. After he'll get to know you better though- oh he'll buy every magazine you're on, every single thing that has your face on it, he'll own it.

He's actually proud of you. And he'll even say it out loud! (NOW YOU KNOW THIS MF IS IN LOVE, HE NEVER ADMITS TO BE ACTUALLY PROUD OF SOMEONE)

Will give you anything you ask for. In need of money? Sure. You want to buy this? He's got it covered babe.

KILLER:

Killer knew you way before he even met you. He's a fan lmao.

He seriously owns EVERY magazine you're in, and listened to every podcast you did. He's obsessed.

It's his guilty pleasure to stalk you online-

Imagine his surprise when he met you while he was on his mission. He was supposed to destroy an AU, along with Horror and Dust helping him, but after he saw you?? His idol? His favorite model?? THE ONE HE YEARNED SO MUCH FOR-

He got completely distracted, not fulfilling the mission, and instead asking you for an autograph.

He's so shocked when he sees you doing all that chaotic shit. You killed people? Brainwashed them? Manipulated them? DESTROYED A WHOLE UNIVERSE?! Wait...YOU DID THAT JUST BECAUSE YOI WERE BORED?!? You just became even more cooler.

Killer fell more obsessed in love with you.

DUST:

Lmao, he hates you. And not because you're a model, but because you're so chaotic.

Seriously, one Nightmare is enough 🙄

He's one of the "quiet but could kill you if wanted" types. So he'll just silently give you a side eye, all while glaring at you, when you're yapping next to him.

You try to get closer to him, and he's all like "Take one more step closer, I dare you"

And then you still get closer to him... And then he finds himself slowly falling into the deep pit you call love.

Even if your relationship had a rocky start, Dust will warm up to you after getting closer to you.

Now, he actually finds himself wanting your closure.

Will still shake his head whenever you do something chaotic, but if you payed closer attention, you could see a blush and a smile covering his hidden face.

HORROR:

Horror doesn't really understand the whole concept of modelling, but he'll like it, because you look so pretty while doing it! ^^

Likes your chaotic side. He watches you with a wide smile whenever you're doing something chaotic.

He's often encouraging you to even do them!

Will support anything you do, much like Nightmare, he'll give you anything you ask for.

Except he doesn't have near as much money as Nightmare, so he'll be a little limited.

But if you want something really bad, he'll save up some money for you to buy the thing you want, or if it's an item, he'll try to handmade it.

HC that Horror likes to do wood carving :)

Please tell him about your chaotic adventures, he'll thrive in them!

DREAM

You're a menace to society, and he's determined to change you.

He'll try to change the way you do certain things, or the way you think. Basically just nullify your chaotic side.

You're probably not listening to his scolding or tips most of the time though. 🤷‍♀️

Oh god...if you ever tell this man just WHAT you did... He'll destroy you right there.(In what way though ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°))

He sees you as a potential threat. Seeing as you destroyed a universe, and just because you were bored too!

As for your modelling career, Dream won't pay attention to what you do, his whole attention is on how chaotic you are.

INK:

The gossip king right here folks.

He also, much like Killer, already knows about your modelling career.

Why? He lives off of the drama. (There's quite a lot involving you, because you're so chaotic 💀)

He'll also ask for your autograph the moment he sees you.

He'll always laugh out of glee whenever you tell him about something chaotic you did.

There's no way to really "shock" him, unless you tell him that you know the purpose of his vials... No one was supposed to know what use the vials have for him, and you actually knowing?? He's feral.. and I don't mean it in a good way...

Other than his vials, there is really NO way of ticking him off. He's just unbreakable. 🤷‍♀️ (Probably cause he doesn't have real emotions-)

SWAP:

HE WANTS TO BE YOUR BODYGUARD!! (Say yes, or you'll never get rid of him..)

He likes to assist you in every way, anything you need, and he's up and ready to get it to you.

Swap sees the good in everyone, so when you tell him how chaotic you are, he won't give up on you! He's not like Dream, who'll want to change you, instead.. he'll want to understand why you're acting the way you do, and try to connect with you through that.

You and Swap probably get along really well, he really knows how to befriend people- I guess that's why he's called THE MAGNIFICENT SANS!

He'll be happy to protect you from any creeps that make you too uncomfortable, in fact- he'll probably protect you even before you could tell him.

Swap isn't one to brag, but he'll be happy to show off how strong he is. Carrying you around, holding your heavy bags, anything that requires extra strength- he's there. :)

[zabala0z]

TMA S3 FINALE (and me screaming)

I don’t know where to start. Maybe the fact that everyone I like in this podcast always dies? Yeah I’ll start there. What the fuck guys. What. Like. What?????

I’m not going into my usual format but holy shit. MAG 119 was like motion sickness but for my ears. The music. I hated it so much. That organ. Tim. Tim. I knew he raised too many death flags, Jesus. Like I’m happy and all for him but GOD NO. AND DAISY??? Though when she started attacking the shit out of Breekon and Hope, I did internally cheer her on. The fact they tried to act as Basira made me wanna scream. Now that I think about it, was Daisy being influenced by one of the entities?? Like The Slaughter?

Basira is so much stronger than me. Like genuinely, I think she got bumped up a couple places just by her sheer logic during 119 and I am so impressed 💀 so much so, I’m wondering if she had like any internal help, y’know??

Orsinov is like one of the most horrifying sounding characters here. The moment she put on Gertrude’s and Leitners voice, I shrieked. Something about the sing-song voice, the way she inflects certain words makes my head spin. Like Michael.

Little backtracking, Martins situation with his mom is like devastating. And the moment Elias started speaking, I knew he was gonna pull out some traumatizing shitty news to give Martin, I hate him.

Fast forwarding: Jon’s dreams

Okay. So. Jon I guess is in some sort of coma and man are his dreams fucked up.

All the people that appeared in there were the people who gave physical statements. Not super hard to figure out but we had Dr Lionel Elliott, Tessa Winters, then Daisy but obviously she’s not there (DAISY 😭), Karolina Górka, Jordan Kennedy, I think the melted woman refers to Jude Perry, the hunters (Julia and Trevor), Naomi Herne and then the pitying figure. The only woman I would think would fit this vague description is Sasha because of course it’s vague, he doesn’t remember her and I’m going to sob.

Bit scared on what Jon is turning into. Whatever it is, it’s not anything good. He’s watching a lot and I guess he’s watching other people’s dreams- or nightmares- and just….watching??? I’d be terrified.

Elias got arrested. Love it. Though, “Be seeing you” I HATE YOU. 🫵🏻

Would be happy but god damn PETER LUKAS has replaced him and I don’t know if that’s worse or better because we at least know Elias’s actions and his limits. We don’t know much on Peter and I don’t like him at all. At least he’s giving them paid leave. And a counselor. I personally need a counselor for this WHOLE SEASON.

When people told me “good luck” when I started getting into TMA, I laughed it off. I should’ve taken it more seriously because I have never felt more distinct and unpredictable emotions than listening to this podcast. I think that’s all my thoughts. Mostly I’m just uhh dying here. I hate everyone and this podcast and I’ll be listening to the beginning of Season 4 tomorrow!

Again, thank you to everyone who has been following my mini rants and crappy theories. Remember when I thought Gertrude was living in the tunnels??? But seriously, thanks to anyone who has been like fully reading through my posts. School has been wack and the people, and just the podcast as a whole has been making my time less stressful 💀 anyways that’s too emotionally vulnerable so thank you!!!

[olderthannetfic]

i was listening to the fanficmaverick podcast episode you did on fanfiction history, in which you mentioned (~55 min in) that you were one of the main people writing the terms of service for AO3 and bringing up the types of "would this be allowed" test cases, that these were not "oh it's a slightly problematic kink" but "violent snuff porn of gillian anderson, not scully, but gillian anderson" — and that you all eventually landed on "kinda gross, but legal in the US, and therefore would host." question: was this the most contentious case? any other memorable/notable test cases, or other interesting discussions you can remember?

i'd also love to hear more about how the major archive warnings were decided on — on what basis were these chosen? which others were considered? — if you happen to know!

sincerest thank you for all the work you've done for fandom and the preservation of fandom history. ❤️ seriously, such a feat, and so interesting!

--

I think even then my personal level of wallowing in annoying wank or looking at horrifying fic was vastly higher than everyone else's, so this was pretty much the example we looked at.

Though, if you want to laugh, astolat's original post is still up on LJ with the comments, and there were totally people going "I'd be interested in this new archive project, but not if it includes RPF!" or "Not if it includes any underage fic at all!" etc.

--

On usenet in the 90s, there was somebody or somebodies who were reaaaaally into that specific type of snuff story. I remember noticing how many of them involved not only hangings but very specific imagery of one high heel falling off. I was 13, so I really couldn't tell you if it was one dude with a specific fetish or genuinely super widespread. But it made an impression.

The alt.sex.stories hierarchy was a wild time.

Anyway, in practice, badwrong RPF of female celebs that sounds like it's aimed at straight dudes ends up on fetish sites for whatever the fetish is, not on fic archives for the most part, but I thought it was a useful example because it was so far into actually offensive to AO3y types. We're not talking the weaksauce shit people are always asking me about on here like "Oooh, what if someone posted [bog standard slash trope] to AO3?" as though it's a gotcha.

--

Man... were there other test cases? I'm trying to remember. This was all in like 2008, and of course, I didn't keep internal documents when I left OTW. Not that half of this was stuff I'd have had documented on my computer anyway.

My memory is that the general shape of the content policy had been decided by the founding Board before Content Policy started up. I don't think we were actually making the ruling on RPF ourselves.

I'm pretty sure most of what we were up to was looking at wank and trying to determine how to head off shitty behavior with the ToS. Trying to define harassment is a mega pain in the ass, let me tell you.

One major internal wank there was was deciding whether to allow Original Work. I was the one who'd been in anime fandom, and I was very used to archives that have an original section, often for the "original slash" and "original yaoi" that had nowhere else to go at the time. (These days, you'd just become a "m/m romance" author, as I in fact have.) Fanfiction.net had spun off its original years ago at that point, but a lot of the non-English archives and a lot of the archives in other parts of English-speaking fandom found fannish-but-original to be a normal thing.

I am a grudgy bitch, and I am still not over how much pushback I got on this.

AO3 went live with a ban on original work, but the policy never ended up being heavily enforced. We waited to see what would happen with posting, and it was predictably that people from those backgrounds outside of US Media Fandom posted some original without even thinking it might be banned, but they didn't post so much it overwhelmed the archive.

The big fears had been that #1 people would flood AO3 and drown out the fic. This was predicated on the idiotic notion that original = inherently not fannish, so there's no dividing line. In reality, the people who were used to posting original to fic archives had an internal sense of what belongs and what doesn't. Fear #2 was that people would try to post chapter 1 of a commercial story and then go "See here to buy the rest". Little did we know that this would soon be a problem with fucking fan fiction itself. (Also, commercial spam was always against the rules and needed no extra anti-original work rule.)

People didn't just disagree with me: they looked at me blankly.

Pretty sure I vented about this on that podcast too though. Anyway, most of the shit people find contentious now was already decided before we started writing the ToS, I think... though I don't really remember clearly. We were more looking to plug up holes in the rules that nitpicking trolls could use to harass.

The kinds of things we were deciding were often like the policy that AO3 doesn't necessarily tell you if someone reported you. If they need info, they'll contact you, and if they decide you broke the ToS, you'll hear about it, but obviously bogus reports don't get passed on. This is to remove the temptation to use the team as a proxy to harass a target. An official e-mail, even if it's "You're fine, actually", can be disturbing.

--

Re the warnings themselves, I know I'd done a survey of what archives were out there at the time and had come up with a list of a few dozen. This was early on in OTW's development process, not just for Content Policy. You can still find the list somewhere on that LJ group. Anyway, for the ToS writing, we looked at the commonplace warnings from archives past, which were basically character death, character death, and also character death.

It always cracks me up when people are like "Um, rape makes sense, but how dare they downplay these other bad things with a character death warning?" Old fandom places were full of unwarned for rape, but woe betide the person who posted surprise character death of a main ship!

We needed an under-18 warning because we had a lot of Australian fans who were like "Dude, my government is a bitch, and I cannot use this archive at all if I can't filter that out". Past archives had mostly just banned it entirely or been full of death eaters raping teenage Harry Potter characters with nary an underage warning in sight.

I don't remember why we picked the violence one. It really wasn't common, but maybe we wanted to make a philosophical point that sex doesn't have more cooties than violence.

CNTW was a compromise with older fandom standards where people objected to literally any warnings existing. A lot of the really oldschool warnings debates aren't about which ones you should have but about whether you should have them at all.

I think people around here miss how non-universal warnings are and how many other communities and spaces even today don't think you need all that.

I don't recall if we seriously considered any specific others. I don't think we had a big list, then ruled them out. It's more like we accreted a few must-haves as we went along. We probably looked at the metadata for the eFiction archives that actually had ticky boxes for search (as opposed to the very low-metadata norm on many archives). But a lot of those filters would have been fandom-specific or redundant or hella vague.

One thing to keep in mind is that this was an Era of Archives, so there were fucktons of examples to look at, though only a few flavors of example since a bunch used eFiction or otherwise copied each other's design. It was possible to make some judgements about past norms on archives, not just go "Are we copying FFN or not?" A lot of fans now see fic hosting as the big three or see AO3 as the only option, but we were used to having many archives with many designs.

I know we wanted a short and manageable list of warnings, and we wanted unambiguous things that could be effectively enforced. If I'm populating my hard-coded 90s website with other people's fics, I can go through each for dubcon before I post it (not that you'd ever have warned for dubcon in the 90s). On a big fic archive, making judgement calls on vague ass categories like dubcon is a nightmare.

We did do some focus groups where other interested fans came in and critiqued our work. I can't recall how much was about our ToS wording and how much was about the actual policies. But we did workshop this shit extensively with people who were around at the time. I think many of the whiners now assume it wasn't enough of a community effort (since we didn't decide things they like). But actually, a bunch of people weighed in. Maybe elf remembers what we actually asked them. I think she was in a focus group.

[ashironie]

I don’t have a good feeling about Celia

I tried to post this earlier but it got deleted so fuck

But from so many standpoints she just irks me

-She has the same character archetype as Alice. Many have pointed out their similarities and while this by itself isn’t much (as is everything on this list) with everything else it makes me weirded out

-She just came out of the blue. We had no warning in the episodes before no build up. We were introduced to the concept she was coming and then she came with little fanfare.

-Her introduction to the rest of the cast is a lot different than Sam’s. A lot understated. Maybe Jonny and Alex just didn’t want to do the same thing again but it felt really rushed and weird.

-I cannot see how she can possibly contribute to the plot in any meaningful way if she is just another victim coworker. She was introduced too late to have her death feel like anything but fridging (when you make a character just to kill them for momentary character drama), once again she shares a character archetype with Alice so the only thing that they could give Celia could be given to Alice perfectly fine, and she once again feels forced

-Celia was also too comfortable too quick for me. She just instantly trusted none of her coworkers would report her for talking shit about their boss. She seemed too genuine about everything even though she was in a completely new environment. And she was just so laid back with everything, like sure she might not know the full scale of things but she seems like she’s been their for as long as anyone can remember (something that might be due to the fact I associate this trait with Alice who has been there a long time)

-idk if I’m reaching or going crazy with this one but Alice seemed off. She moreso just said “I’m Alice” and and Aliced all over the place. But as soon as Celia left she said ‘yeah’ sorta suspiciously? Maybe I’m crazy. Then she’s back to herself replying to Gwen, who we can assume is only less interested in what Celia has to say due to the situation she’s found herself in during ep 4 was it? with Lena. The only time we really get to know her thoughts about Celia when she isn’t in front of her is when she’s bugging Sam about his crush on her, and also literally all conversation she has with Celia she also has with Sam and shifts the conversation (aside from just meeting Celia) to Sam (imo). The only time we get her opinions on Celia away from other characters is the little ‘yeah’.

-We don’t see Colin’s reaction to Celia either, which would mark the third episode in a row where Colin is only mentioned (to my knowledge). Though we don’t have any mention that he’s been hostile to her. The only characters that truly talk to her and that we can see their reactions to her are Alice and Sam. One who I’m convinced is suspicious of her and the other who’s ’in love’ with her (I was completely caught off guard by this due to not even thinking about any of that in the very beginnings of a horror podcast, I’m autistic and demiromantic, and because I was half listening the first time I listened. I sense it more but it still feels like a stretch to me before Alice mentions it though makes a lot of sense due to Sam’s reaction to her mentioning it)

-I feel like I’d be amiss to not mention the fact this is the episode we truly have an Avatar in it. Needles is the first avatar we tma enjoyers know as an avatar (in Norris’s statement in ep1 we have the maybe scammer but it’s unclear weather that’s an Avatar, someone being possessed, or something else entirely). Thematically, this would be a great way to establish a connection with Avatar and Celia. She was introduced exactly when Avatars were. Also the episode name could also be a reference to the fact we are having our “introductions” to Avatars thought this episode, but that’s unrelated.

-People has also pointed out Celia is in Tma, same name and same voice actress (so no Michael situation or helen and Mel’s therapist situation [I think I remember them having the same voice actress and that being a problem] here). Although I don’t know what the could mean but that’s actually the reason I decided to rewrite this mini-notsomini-rant.

I could be wrong about all of this and am prepared to be wrong but still, needed to get this out there.

[atlitudes]

I'm Cataloging Every Occurrence of the Piano in Malevolent in a Spreadsheet for Leitmotif Analysis. No, I'm Not Kidding.

As the title of this post reads, I've spent the last few weeks listening to every episode of Malevolent and logging every time the piano is heard (both within the story and as background score), to analyze the data for leitmotif/music based theory-crafting. I originally was planning on getting through the entire series before posting anything, but I am very quickly realizing that this is going to take me a while, and I start a new semester in two weeks, so there is a high likelihood I will not finish before I get too busy to chug through as many episodes a day as I am now. I'm on episode 16/44 and I've already logged 137 instances of piano music. I'm not even halfway done. And this is all I've been doing for the past multiple days. For this reason, I've decided to post the link to the spreadsheet before finishing.

If you're familiar with Malevolent, and just how much music is in it, you might be asking, "OP, are you utterly fucking insane?" And well, dear reader, the answer to that is probably yes, but while you might call it madness, I call it love. So, before getting into the meat of things, I wanted to explain why I even decided to do this. Spoilers ahead for Malevolent (obvious, but yeah). If you don't give a single shit about why I did this and want to get straight to the sheet, scroll to the bottom for the link.

So. About 2 weeks ago I finished my first listen-through of Malevolent. One thing about the most recent episodes struck me as very very significant: John and Arthur's "collective force" being titled as the Dies Irae.

Now, a full-bodied explanation of why I find this so important and the possible implications will come at a later date, but long story short, the Dies Irae is a very significant piece of musical literature-- it is, perhaps, the most commonly quoted leitmotif of the past 800 years, and it symbolizes death. So, understandably, the Themes of this kinda sent me down a spiral.

But the Dies Irae being mentioned in such a way also got me thinking: music is a pretty integral part of Malevolent. So, is the Dies Irae quoted anywhere in its soundtrack? I suddenly got very very excited at this prospect, particularly if it might be in Faroe's Song, because well... god that would hurt lol. I scoured the available songs on the bandcamp aaaaand... no luck (as far as I can tell). Regardless, even if the Dies Irae wasn't a part of the soundtrack, I became curious about what kind of leitmotifs were in the podcast, and what they might mean. And so, the spreadsheet was born.

I explain this in the User Guide part of the sheet (please read it before going through the rest btw), but I only track the piano parts of the podcast. The reason for this is two-fold:

First, score wise, piano is very easy for me to pick apart, and I don't see a lot of significance in the suspenseful string music for horror moments (though I don't deny there might be something to it, I simply won't be able to find it.) To me, the piano is also significantly more important than the strings because it's a notable part of the story-- Arthur and his relation to the instrument is a key part of the plot, and multiple of the piano compositions are made by him. For this reason, I found tracking the piano in the podcast worthwhile.

Second, I also don't touch any of the non-original radio tracks in the podcast (i.e. You Call It Madness (I Call It Love)) because this video by The Final Fantasmagorie already does an excellent job of covering them (please check it out!!), and I felt it would be redundant, especially considering the astronomical amount of ground I already have to cover. If these tracks start being featured as leitmotifs in the piano music then... well, I might change my mind, but so far, no dice.

If I noticed a non-piano piece of music (such as the wraith humming in Ep3) that I haven't found any analysis of whatsoever, I also noted it just so there was some record. Other than that, just piano tracks.

Explanations and disclaimers out of the way, here is the link to the spreadsheet. I might open it up to comments and/or editors at some point, but for now, it's just available to viewers. Once again, please read the disclaimer and user guide before the rest of the sheets.

Thanks for reading, I know this was a very long post, and I appreciate it if you've beared with me! Enjoy!

[tomssexdoll]

You said you wanted requests? Well, I wanted to request something then. Firstly, hello. Now, my request.

2008 Tom with a fem reader who is also part of a band and plays guitar just like him. They're like perfect for each other. But the reader is a bit introverted, so some of Tom's "fans" don't like her, etc.

Thanks :)

hellloo!!! tysm for the req love <3

PAIRINGS: Tom 2008 x Female reader CONTENT: FLUFF SYPNOSIS: Tom and Y/N are together and are both in the band Tokio hotel, they both play guitar. Y/N is always getting critisized by their fans, girls attacking her for her looks, personality and that she's slightly introverted. She doesn't listen to them but sometimes it gets to her, they make rumors about her on the daily but Tom loves her to bits and tells her not to listen to them and that they're jealous shes in his bed at the end of the day. A/N: this will be short and sweet :)

I'm in the band Tokio hotel, I play guitar along with my boyfriend. My best friends Bill, Gustav and Georg are also in it. Bill is the singer, Georg is the bassist and Gustav is the drummer. They are all super sweet and make me feel super welcome, we've been friends for years and only recently I joined the band because Bill needed extra help with the guitar.

I got with Tom a year after we became friends, we were 15 and it was like love at first sight.

A lot Toms fans HATE me, they talk so much shit about me for no reason, critizing every little thing, especially because I'm a little bit introverted. They say he could never be with someone as quiet as me, as fat or ugly as me. I never take it to heart but sometimes it hurts.

Me and Tom are in love, the love you find in movies, the corny type of love you wish you had in real life. He treats me like a queen, always boasting about me and bragging about how beautiful I am, of course the fans get mad at this but he always shuts it down, he's not afraid to stand up for me and it's the cutest thing ever.

One time on a podcast he was calling out the fans, saying how rude the fans can be and how it affects me sometimes. On their youtube channel and his facebook he posts short clips of me playing guitar, usually not realising he's filming. The comments blow up with hateful things but he always rolls his eyes when seeing them, deleting the really mean ones.

One of the really fucked up rumors is that I had cheated on him with Bill, they said it's weird how close I was to him and that I was probably fucking him behind Tom's back, they had the weirdest proof ever, some were photoshopped so poorly and some were really convincing, but he never believed them. He always laughed at it, the attempts to ruin our relationship were so weird.

Even though he's very extroverted and I'm a bit shy, we are perfect for each other. We enjoy almost the same things, eat the same foods, sleep perfectly, fuck perfectly, kiss perfectly. Sometimes to make the fans jealous I'll post pictures of us in bed or him kissing me.

[ask-james-madison-stuff]

Josephine Payne

(My fankid of James Madison and Doley Madison when James left Doley she was pregnant but Doley but never told James and Doley raised Josephine making her believe James abandoned them so she is acting like a bitch to Caroline but Caroline doesn’t say anything about Josephine to her dads but she also didn’t knew Josephine was her half sister)

Josephine:

- That fucker is back!

Diane(Josephine’s girlfriend):

-Yeah, I thought he was gone for good too

Josephine:

-It’s been so long!!!

Diane:

-You still pissed she almost beat you that time?

Josephine:

-Uh, fuck you!

Diane:

-Just saying

Josephine:

-Things have changed a lot since she left town!

Diane:

-That's for sure

Josephine:

-I gotta send a message of who's really in charge of things now

(sung)

Welcome home

I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone

Say hello to a new status quo

Everyone knows that there's a brand new dawn

Turn the TV on!

*Josephine opens her life stream*

Diane spoken:

-Camera speeds

Rolling in three, two

Background music:

-Welcome to the show!

Josephine:

-Top of the hour, and we're discussing a certain has-been

Who has been spotted cavorting around town

Background music:

-Welcome to the show

Josephine:

-After a seven-year absence

Did anybody miss her?

Did anybody notice?

More on tonight's program!

So, the Treasury States

is back in town

Why is she hanging around?

What does that mean for your family?

Well handily, I've got good news

She's a loser, a fossil

And I don't mean to sound hostile, but the Girl is a coward!

You can take that as gospel

Pulling my viewers? Impossible

I'm visual, she's barely audible

Stop giving her the time of day, don't listen to a word she say

I hope she had a nice vacay, but she should've stayed away

While she hid in Italy, we've pivoted to video

Now her medium is getting bloody rare

America been better since she split

Where's she been? Who gives a shit?

Caroline enters the chat:

-Salutations!

Good to be back on the air

Yes, I know it's been a while

Since someone with style treated America to a broadcast

People, rejoice!

Josephine:

-What a dated voice!

Caroline:

-Instead of a clout-chasing mediocre video podcast

Josephine:

-Come on!

Caroline:

-Is Josephine insecure, pursuing allure?

Flitting between this fad and that, is nothing working?

Josephine:

-Ignore her chirping!

Caroline:

-Every day, she's got a new format!

Josephine:

-You're looking at a queen, she's the shit that comes before that!

Caroline:

-Is Josephine as strong as she purports?

Or is it based on her support?

She'd be powerless without her Mommy and Gal!

Josephine:

-Oh, please!

Caroline:

-And here's the sugar on the cream she told me I ruined her life

Josephine:

-H-hold on!

Caroline:

-I said Whatever now she's pissy

That's the tea!

Josephine’s camera glitching:

-You old-timey prick, I'll show you suf-ffering

Caroline:

-Uh oh, the Star is buffering!

Josephine:

-I'll destroy you, yo-ou lit-tle—

Josephine camera lost its signal and ended

Caroline opens her live stream:

-I'm afraid you've lost your signal

Let's begin

I'm gonna make you wish that I'd stayed gone, tune on in

When I'm done, your status quo will know its race is run

Oh, this will be fun

Caroline said than ending the livestream smirking

(*wheezing due to how funny this is* also that's interesting! way to make Thomas and James look bad though-)

*James was working in his office and for some reason he got a glimpse of that live stream and saw Josephine, it shocked him how much that kid looked like him which has him overthinking now*

[lukolabrainrot]

Would love to know if everyone else is constantly flip flopping between ok they will absolutely get together to if they haven't by now after a tour like that, they never will and they must have their reasons?! It's driving me insane, I don't know how people have coped since the days of Jade, I'm only a few months in and already need them to sort their shit out!

Like I was fully optimistic the other day thinking it was plausible that Nic was wearing Lukes "drink milk" shirt with the half turned up sleeve (what has my life become!) and she looked so happy and she was posting more again on sm, knowing everyone would over analyse everything so I thought maybe things were taking a turn for the positive!

Now I'm reading the X rumours he's been spotted in some other country and people speculating its Cyrpus with A visiting her family. Could be absolute nonsense but the fact DM rehashed her old podcast about them, it would follow that we will get bombarded with clues now of where they are together from A. If they are on a holiday just the 2 of them, that kind of throws a lot of my theories out the window where I thought he would want to be distancing himself from A now in order to make a go of things with Nic.

But then I remember there has to be something more than friends between N & L or else I think Nic would have come to Lukes defence in a much stronger way after the pap walk given the backlash he got after it. I think if it had been all PR playing into their natural chemistry, Nic wouldn't have let him take the heat on his own as there was two of them in it and it would have been their game plan from the start, even with A being on the scene. Nic is very SM savvy and with their PR teams I'm sure they could have figured something to minimise the impact even though they would both then of got it in the neck for gaslighting everyone, at least it would have been done and everyone would have moved on by now! Instead, they both disappeared from SM and ignored it all because they couldn't refute what everyone saw because they are in love and didn't want to lie!!

So then I'm back to their absolutely has to be more to their story and the cycle just continues everytime something with A or JD crops up and I'm like, what are they all doing!!!

Same anon, same.

It's been quite the 🎢 on this 🚢, BUT I've been feeling more optimistic in general about L/N lately, and I think this is what's been helping me stay positive and level-headed in the midst of all the noise:

I literally don't listen to ANY of the rumors until I have receipts/proof. If I don't have this, then I just consider the rumor to be BS. This has been helping me soooo much! Although, I still spiral every once in a while 😅

I think we had soooo much content of L/N for MONTHS, that I think we all are kind of going through "withdrawals" (for lack of a better word), especially for those of us that are new to the ship, and are therefore hyperanalyzing EVERYTHING related to L and N. I keep reminding myself that it is normal for L/N to not put out a lot of content of each other in the in-between periods of Bridgerton. I also remind myself we have NO idea 100% what's going on with them BTS until we get more public confirmation (which we may or may not get).

Lastly, like you mentioned anon, I feel like if NOTHING had been going on between L/N during the PR tour, they would have publicly shut down the rumors, ESPECIALLY if L was really in a serious relationship with A. However, other than that one story N posted right after Papgate calling L a great "friend", they didn't really solidly come out and clarify that what we saw wasn't more than just PR. Why?? Because it wasn't, and like you mentioned anon, they couldn't refute that. I think a lot of things about them came out publicly that they weren't exactly ready for the public to know, so they TRIED to hide behind their characters on the tour (they didn't do a super good job with that imo, but I think that's because this was a HUGE deal for them and they were HAPPY and having a hard time hiding it 😍). So they had to correct for that, which resulted in a lot of what we saw between L/N/A after the London premiere. I've talked about my thoughts on all this in my "timelines" posts, so please refer to those if you would like to know more of my thoughts on all that. HOWEVER, I think we have gotten QUITE A FEW Easter Eggs the last few days, from N especially, that hint that things are moving in a positive direction with these two 👀 I'll talk about my thoughts on that sometime tonight...

[corporatefrog]

꒦‧₊ ꒷ HEADCANNONS: Going on a Road Trip with Craig, Tweek, Jimmy, Tolkien, and Clyde (Separately) ✧.*

✧.* tags: college au, road trips, ✧.* Characters: craig tucker, tweek tweek, jimmy valmer, clyde donovan, tolkien black a/n: the stan's gang version got so much love that I thought I'd do the headcannons with the others too!

masterlist

Craig

Thinks everyone is a terrible driver except for him

(he can’t parallel park for shit though)

You guys make up stories about the people you pass

“Oh he’s going through a messy divorce”

“Yeah but it’s his fault for sleeping with Miss America”

“Well if he didn’t, she was going to release the tax documents revealing he was an illegal immigrant from australia! And he can’t return to the outback!” 

He’s a pretty good road trip buddy if you don’t mind silence. 

He kind of zones out when driving so it’s not an awkward silence, just a comfortable silence

Very picky about podcasts and music though, he gets aux because he’s the one driving

PODCASTS ABOUT SPACE!! 

doesn't have Bluetooth in his car so he uses one of those connectors that plug into the cigarette lighters LMAOOO 

"bro it's 2023 why are you living in 2006" 

"because it has great mileage. shut up or walk" 

Jimmy

This will go one of two ways depending on how much you enjoy stand up comedy

Because you’ve bought yourself a ticket to the 6 hour Jimmy-athon

Every billboard is a joke

Every car you pass is a joke

Every gas station you walk into is at least 5 jokes

You’re actually probably driving to a comedian convention

you listen to the material of the panelists to figure out where he'd want to go

he makes you laugh so much you need to pull over

he probably takes a nap halfway through 

looks like a little cat curled up in the passenger seat

honestly such a good drive

whenever you get bored all you need to do is make a comment about a weird road sign and you've got entertainment for at least 30 minutes

if you don't like his comedy…

just don't. 

you will not survive.

(and you're probably a terrible person)

Tweek

There’s no way he doesn’t get car sick.

Like just absolutely demolished

You think he’s dying for a little bit because he’s just leaning against the window whispering prayers to whatever god will listen

Then you buy some medicine from a gas station and i swear it’s like you’ve opened a new conspiracy for him

“But if these have existed for so long, why hasn’t anyone told me about them?! There’s got to be something wrong with them! DID YOU JUST GIVE ME POISON!”

“Do you still feel like blowing chunks all over my windshield?” 

“Well no, not right now.”

“Then I really doubt it can be poison dude”

Don’t let him drive. 

Just don’t. 

He gets freaked out enough when you drive down a busy street. More than 3 lanes and he’s absolutely screaming

“WHY ARE THEY DRIVING SO FAST?! THE SPEED LIMIT IS 55”

“That’s not how the midwest works, tweek. We’re going 87 right now”

“87 THATS 32 MORE THAN WE’RE SUPPOSED TO- OH GOD WE’RE GOING TO GET INTO A CRASH AND FLIP THE CAR AND RUN INTO ANOTHER CAR AND THEN THAT CAR WILL EXPLODE AND NO ONE WILL FIND OUR BODIES-”

he's surprisingly good at mental math when it comes to calculating the possibility of his death

Clyde

He’d much rather fly than drive

He gets bored so fast like what are you supposed to do in a car? Sit there and… sit there?

Does not want to be in the car for more than 30 minutes

“Are we there yet?”

“We’ve been driving for an hour, Clyde”

“Okay and how much longer do we have?”

“5 hours.”

“WHAT”

Definitely had to use the bathroom every hour because he CHUGS monsters to stay awake then immediately crashes and sleeps for half of the ride

He sets up his phone so a movie can play but it’s really just him watching the movie because you have to keep driving

“You know, if we fly back then you can watch this with me”

“Well then my car would be stranded in the Chicago.”

“Can’t you just get someone to drive it back?”

“I will leave you at the next gas station and make you hitchhike home.”

“ITS A GENUINE QUESTION”

Tolkien

Oh he absolutely loves to drive

But who wouldn’t when you’ve got a fucking TESLA

(he totally has a tesla, no way he doesn’t have a tesla)

Will NOT allow chips in the car

If you do, you’re vacuuming the seats at the next gas station

“You’re not bringing those in here”

“But you can’t go on a road trip without corn nuts” 

“You can and you will.”

“Can we at least get coffee then :((“

“Well duh we’re getting coffee”

Will buy you a little drink and give you a blanket

He makes YOU a passenger princess and it’s absolutely amazing

Another podcast listener, but he likes to space them out with music so you’re not both sitting there silently the whole road trip

You’re going on the trip to hang out! You’ve got to have some random chit chat time too!

“There is no way Kuroko’s Basketball is better than Slam Dunk.”

“That’s just because you’re a snob about sports anime.”

“No that’s just because i'm right about sports anime and you spend too much time talking with Wendy”

[cryptic-science]

okay, trying something new and im going to write all my thoughts down while listening to the ep :3 here we go gamers:

- the singer is absolutely one of my favourite bits

- "podcasting is cool >:(("

- "just go oil your beard >:( idiot."

- god i fucking love sherlock and johns dynamic

- sherlock is so me

- "my doctorate in gooseology"

- "watson is this absolutely necessary- OOO !! get these !!!! lovely"

- i love it when they "argue" so much

- JOHN YOU DICK GIVE SHERLOCK HIS BISCUITS

- circuit failure ??

- jesus christ 10,000 for a watch

- OOOOO THAT WAS SICK

- i love them so bad

- TWO BIRDS ONE STONE

- wait oh my god the dead goose was definitely a decoy. they never pulled the gem out of it. they dont know if its for sure the real gem. its a decoy its a decoy

- "or yknow whatever it is that goes after geese. lion ? i dont know." how is one man so babygirl.

- SHERLOCK STIMMING

- HE SAID THE THING !!! HE SAID NO SHIT SHERLOCK !!! I MEAN HES LITERALLY TALKING ABOUT HOW THERE IS NO SHIT BUT STILL !!

- "YOUR GOOSE IS CONSTIPATED !!"

- "alright heather, just gonna- just gonna take a quick peek at your ass."

- i was so right i was so right im foaming at the mouth hehehehe

- sherlock mic time

- john whispering sweetly to heather and comforting her. i love you so much john. "hey its okay heather(? i think he says heather i am struggling to make out what hes saying), we all get sore bottoms from time to time"

- wait was i wrong ??

- oh god sherlock.

- MIC UP HEATHERS ASS.

- OH MY GOD IT WAS HIS WATCH NOT A DECOY I WAS SO CLOSE

- john stick your hand up that gooses ass !!!!

- poor heather

- WAS THE SQUELCHING NECESSARY.

- HAHAHAHAAA HES SO PISSED

- sherlock: "long old day really"

john: " just dont talk. just. dont even talk."

sherlock: "when do you want to eat ?"

john: "hmm. im gonna go wash my hands again."

- this is such a married couple "fight" if im being honest with yall

- immediate whiplash from the sudden christmas vibes

- my heart is so full.

- :(( their dinner has been interrupted :((

- "does your know no bounds? you can beg all you want." GOD I LOVE WHEN SHERLOCK GETS LIKE THIS

- YEAH BRO LET THEM GET BACK TO THEIR CHRISTMAS DINNER

- GIFTS !!!!!!

- SHERLOCK IS SO HAPPY IM GONNA CRY

- JOHN GOT HIM FUCKING CUSTOMIZED EAR DEFENDERS IM FUCKING SOBBING.

- HE GOT JOHN A GIFT TOO HE GOT JOHN A GIFT TOO

- sherlock.

- JOHN.

- he is wearing and enjoying the watch.

- OBVIOUSLY IT FUCKING SMELLS JOHN.

- this podcast is gift enough for us john

- JOHN RIPPING INTO THE SINGERS ASS HAHAHAHAAAAA

- shout out to adam for having incredible vocals though. such a good singer. that was very pretty.

my heart always feels so fucking full after every sherlock & co episode. i love this pod so much.

[preciadosbass]

28/7/14 [draft from yesterday]

woke up at 11:47 to my parents in my doorway. mum started putting stuff on my bed but i though it was just stuff of mine that id left around the house but it turned out she’d bought me some stuff which is really nice. she got me socks [because i only have one non-fluffy pair], slippers [because our dogs hair is everywhere and my pyjamas end up getting the hair all over the house, even after the place has been hoovered], and purple trainers [because beforehand i only had my converse + knee high converse, and they were both getting muddy and causing me blisters when i go on walks.] i feel extra bad about the argument we had last night now.

i was super tired and my eyes still felt like they were glued shut but i decided not to go back to sleep. i got a little anxious when i saw my ex bestfriend was sad so i sent him a message telling him that i’m here for him and stuff. i still care about him so much, even if we don’t talk anymore. i watched a mikey way complication and listened to a podcast with the way brothers on up until 1:20 when i had a nap [im lazy, i know]

i should mention, i had the weirdest dream. so excuse how bad this explanation is going to be. me and kellin [quinn] were both teens and we were at a restaurant. he had tacky plastic skates on and started doing backflips in them? and running on the spot and joking about being chased? it was such a strange dream to have, especially because i haven’t had one in ages. also, my dad was there for some reason lmaoo

i woke up at around 2 and stayed with boris until 3:20 before i had something to eat and started researching a few crime cases. id been thinking about reading a bit of my sylvia plath book but i got in another argument with my parents [not really with my dad] and practically went into sensory overload so i went in my room and scrolled through ed related things on reddit. although i just wanted to have a conversation with them.

my dad lets things go easier, but mum tends to start saying ‘maybe you’d be happy if i’m not here’ and stuff like that, which i have never and would never imply to her. it just makes me feel like shit, she acts like i’m not allowed to be mad. and i feel absolutely terrible writing this, especially because of the whole gift thing from earlier, and i know shes probably just stressed, and i love her, but nobody acknowledges that i am too. they never do, whatever i do seems to anger my mum. anyway, i spiralled writing this and i don’t wanna turn it into a complete vent post, so let’s carry on.

i carried on scrolling through reddit until like 8 where i went on a walk with all of my family [which we haven’t done in at least a year]. didn’t get off to a good start because the second i walked outside my sister dropped her phone on our rock driveway and smashed her phone to pieces.

she was arguing about paying for the damage up until we got to the park when she went back home with my dad. me and my mum carried on walking while we did would you rather because anything else was starting an argument. we ended up doing so right before we got home but at least i walked for an hour today, i wish it’d been more though. also at one point she asked me if i was questioning my gender like WHAT?? why didn’t i take the opportunity to tell her ffs.. when i got home i obviously said hi to boris and then scrolled on twitter for a bit.

one of my acquaintance’s [i call anyone my age that i know that, because i know people, but they’re not nice to me whatsoever, we don’t hang out, they bully me, i don’t consider them a friend etc] was being their usual self again. i try everything i can to politely escape them/avoid them but i just don’t know how. id feel bad cutting contact with no explanation but if i told them all the disgusting things they do they’d deny it. but i know i have to at some point, they’re such a bad person and i’m tired of putting up with them.

anyway, i feel like i seem like a bitch for not liking them, and the problem in every scenario i’ve written about today so let me know if anyone actually reads this and wants to know what makes her such a bad person. after seeing that i listened to some evanescence and i was just about to put on my fight club dvd i got from a bootsale a while ago when my dad said he was ready for me to ask questions about boris soon so i went up to their room.

we actually didn’t argue tonight because i was able to get on with it quite quickly so i did my teeth and said goodnight to boris around 3. he again started purring before id even started stroking him, he’s so precious. also went over my cals by like 60 today so that sucks

have a good day/night -_<