#I guess we're drawing the line when it comes to alcohol

[ndostairlyrium]

We did it Carla, you got avenged!

[kimbapisnotsushi]

hey all i know a lot of us aren't on twt so here's a post of info from the translated material very kindly given to us by @TrianaNero. first we're starting with info from a bonus volume given to people going to the movie, in which furudate is interviewed about the characters!! some of the questions aren't really necessary to know, some are, and some i think are just funny, which is why there's a mix of them! find the full thread here, of which i directly quoted

kenma is STILL having trouble choosing a fave game BUT apparently his first game was mario kart 64!!

lev's weirdest nickname he received from the upperclassmen is "flora-san", which is (and this is a direct quote) "to honor lev's commendable gut flora that helps him always have good bowel movements" (LMAAAAAO I'M CRYING)

taketora's mohawk came from copying an italian player during his first year

okay i HAVE to include the question in this one because the question was "i admire how considerate and serene kai always is, how can i also become like that?" and the answer is. "face death once". ????? kai??? are you okay???

a "lame pun" that fukunaga likes is "happiceive" LMAO

other than racing each other, inuoka and hinata compete in who can eat fish the cleanest

THIS ONE IS ABOUT SHIBAYAMA MY BOY anyways the question was "nishinoya taught shibayama how to keep calm -- did he manage that?" and the answer was "i'm sure he still has a long way to go" so. it's a work in progress i guess (poor shibayama . . . )

"teshiro and tsukishima both try to avoid noisy places when eating or taking a break and because of that sometimes end up near each other" (this is SO cute i'm crying)

apparently the player that impressed akane the most at the tournament was atsumu?? girl you can do better

"what does alisa consider cool about her brother" "everything" STOP IT RIGHT NOW MY HEART

coach nekomata's favorite alcohol is "sake (the bitter kind)"

IUGASDAD LMNGAAAO ON THE OTHER HAND NAOI GETS "HALF-DRUNK "HALF INTOXICATED" FROM TWO GLASSES OF BEER (and his face turns red at one!)

furudate says that fukunaga was the hardest to draw "because i feel pressured to come up with interesting lines for him"

he also says that he'd be friends with yamamoto if he was on nekoma, because "once you get close to him, you become really good friends pretty easily"

the "we are the blood" speech was something kuroo and the others wanted to "come up with something original for the team" in their second year!! (i think for when they would become third years, according to the post)

AYUDSFBTFDKAS WE HAVE CAT MASCOTS!!! apparently they're all crossbreeds except lev and inuoka (i don't know enough about animals or cats to know what that means) kenma: calico kuroo: black cat yamamoto: orange tabby (@kanoyachi says that he's not neutered in that illustration of them which i have not seen?? do with that what you will) yaku: grey tabby kai: tortoiseshell cat fukunaga: bicolor cat inuoka: maine coon (I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS) lev: russian blue shibayama: tuxedo cat (SOBBING) teshiro: white cat

never mind i have since been sent that image. what the fuck

uhhh okay i don't entirely get what this one means but Q: Share a secret about Nekoma A: It's not Hanako-san in the toilet, it's Suzuki-san

the full lyrics of hinata's toilet song: "Toi-toi-toilet! Toile-let! Whoam I! The guy! Who'll become the ace! Fly fly a 100 meters! Go go 10k km! And befo-ore tha-at--" (repeat from beginning)

the reason why kageyama is concerned that animals don't like him: "when i was in elementary school, a toy poodle from the neighborhood who'd show his belly to anyone always kept barking at me for some reason"

the only times daichi was angrier than when kageyama and hinata fought was when noya and tanaka "wrestled and broke some equipment". and also when they "tried to race a car while running". apparently they ignored the first warning both times

IUAHFDOS FURUDATE GOT ASKED WHETHER SUGA OR FUKUNAGA WAS FUNNIER AND THE ANSWER WAS "i think it depends on the person. for kenma it's fukunaga"

asahi's favorite animal is "whichever doesn't bite"

Q: How to become as mentally strong/solid as Nishinoya? A: Do everything you're scared of

Q: Tanaka said he gets down in the dumps about once in 6 months, what caused that before? A: When he couldn't spike or serve or pass properly, be that practice or official matches

tsukishima likes shortcakes bc "he used to be rewarded with them for getting his vaccine shots" . . .

apparently yamaguchi likes soggy fries because "they have a very pronounced taste". whatever the hell that means??

Q: What was Yachi's most pessmistic episode up until now? A: When she got an award of excellence at a crime prevention poster competition in middle school. She feared that other people'd be like "why did they choose this", "there's clearly better submissions" (YACHI YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS)

Q: I like Takeda-sensei's "Chaaah!" when he drinks. What other sounds does he make? A: "Okkaree"

ukai got healthy eating habits from a book where he read that your muscles break down if you don't get all the nutrients you need, "and that gave him a really good scare"

Q: Who'd you be best friends with on Karasuno? A: Azumane. Peace.

so apparently a secret about karasuno is that they used to share the club room with a mountain climbing club which "disappeared" (??? i'm assuming that means disbanded it just sounds so ominous) and so they "ended up with quite a big room"

furudate uses a bird-person as his avatar because "i like birds and apparently i remind some people of a bird"

Q: What was the idea behind the recent bonus chapter? A: I wanted to include how nekoma realized it was useless to dive after that ball but they simply couldn't help it in the main manga—but it ruined the flow a little, so i took it out, and then I wanted to include it here.

(STOP IT I'M CRYING YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT COUL;D HAVE BEEN IN THE SERIES???)

HJKSDFGBJKSFD LMAAAAO during furudate's research process he took pics of the players and the seated fans during the match and received suspicious looks for it. and ended that question with "I'm sorry for acting suspiciously" and that's that!!! WHEW that was a doozy. i'll make another post describing some illustrations from the same thread, and one covering the magazine digest thread, so keep an eye out for that as well!! thanks for joing me!!!

[alltoowelltom]

pink lines [part seven]

tom holland x reader

series summary: when you find yourself alone, pregnant and scared, there’s only one person you can turn to. but where do you draw the line between friendship and more…

updates tuesday nights EST ?

warnings for this part: pregnancy, alcohol, cursing, bit of angsting, minor mentions of cheating ?

a/n: i'm so sorry this chapter's so short! i have 3 papers due this week but still wanted to give you guys an update. we're almost there i promise <3

✧･ﾟ: chapter seven･ﾟ:✧

“Pass me that pile there?” you say, gesturing for the neatly folded pile of shirts on Tom’s left.

He hands over the stack, rolling his eyes.

“I can pack a suitcase myself, you know.”

You nod.

“I know you can. I just want to make sure you don’t forget anything, okay?”

Tom grins at you.

“Awh! You actually vaguely care about me!”

You reach out and shove at his upper arm.

“You’re so rude to me, pack your own damn suitcase I don’t care,” you fight back a giggle.

Tom leans backwards so he’s laying down on his bed, legs dangling off the side from the knees down.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay while I’m away? Because I can call and cancel. Sony really don’t need me all that much…”

You zip the suitcase and push it over so there’s space to lay down next to Tom. It takes a little effort due to your large pregnant belly, but you and Tom manage it. You twist your head to the side and are met with Tom’s chocolate brown eyes already looking in yours.

“It’s only a few weeks,Tom.”

He sighs.

“I know, but the baby’s due in a month or so and I just worry about you, love. What if you need to get something, or you can’t reach ‘cause your stomach’s in the way, or if something happens or-or-”

“Tom.”

He shuts up at his name, waiting for you to continue.

“I’m going to be absolutely fine. I’m starting my maternity leave in three or four weeks anyway. I just want a little more time where things are normal before the baby comes, okay?”

Tom nods and you think he’s going to drop the subject but of course, he doesn’t.

“What if you went and stayed with my parents?”

You roll your eyes.

“Tom, no! I’m literally fine here. Why are you so obsessed with packing me off to stay with someone?”

He reaches out to grab your hand and you mentally pray it isn’t clammy.

“I just prefer the thought that someone’s with you just in case you need it. Mum and Dad would love to have you, I swear.”

You shake your head.

“No, I’ve already dragged their son into having a baby with me, I’m not crashing their literal home for weeks on end too.”

A warning look from Tom tells you exactly what he’s going to say.

“Y/N they love you, you know that-”

“-you know that-” you say at exactly the same time, giggling. “Tommy, I’m not going to go and stay with your parents. I want to be here where I have all my stuff and I’m comfy for these next few weeks. But if you really want, how about I have Harrison and Tuwaine stay over tonight? So that there’s someone here for the first night.”

Tom brightens at your suggestion.

“That’s great, love. Thank you. You know I just want to make sure you and Lolo are looked after, right?” he says, reaching out to gently stroke your swollen belly with one hand. His tenderness with the unborn child never fails to make your heart swoop around through your chest, you have to admit.

“I’m still going to call Mum and have her check in on you,” he adds quickly while you’re distracted.

Before you have time to come back with a snarky response, Harry knocks gently on the open door frame. He hovers slightly, as if he’s unsure if he’s interrupting. “Hey, car’s here, bro.”

Tom pouts.

“Oh. Guess it’s time to go, then.”

He sits up and reaches out to help you into a sitting position which you gratefully accept. As Tom lifts his suitcase off the bed and onto the floor, and hops around putting on his socks you turn your attention to Harry.

“Got both your passports?”

“Check.” replies the redhead, one hand in his pocket.

“Flight details?” “Yep.”

“Both your masks?”

“Affirmative.”

“Those minty candies so that your ears don’t hurt when you land?”

“Yes Mum,” says Harry, rolling his eyes.

“Little fucker,” you reply, giggling as you stand up and pull him into a hug as best you can. “See you in a couple weeks,”

He wraps his arms around you gently in response, nodding as he does so. “Try not to get much fatter while we’re gone, okay?” he reaches out and pokes ever so gently at your stomach.

“Hey! Don’t you dare talk about Willow like that!” threatens Tom, striding over with his suitcase in tow.

Harry steps back with his hands in the air.

“Chill, bro. I’ll see you downstairs in a minute then?”

Tom nods and Harry slips out of the room with one last cheeky grin, leaving you alone with Tom.

“So,” you say, unsure of how to do this.

Tom opts for the most Tom option, enveloping you in his thick arms. Your arms instinctively wrap around his torso, leaning into his chest. His chin comes to rest on top of your head, pressing a gentle kiss.

You stay like that for a whole minute, listening to the gentle thud of Tom’s heart and wishing you could simply fold yourself up into his embrace and stay there forever. A honk from outside and a faint “come on bro!” from the driveway causes you both to chuckle slightly, stepping away from each other.

“You call if there’s any problems, any minor inconvenience, anything at all, okay? I mean it, anything. A kid rides his skateboard too close to your car? You run out of toothpaste and can’t be bothered to go to the shops because it’s late? Taylor Swift makes a surprise announcement? Someone says something that annoys you? You listen to nothing but Phoebe Bridgers for too long and end up sobbing on the floor unable to feel your face? You call me and let me know, alright? I’ll be there in thirteen hours tops.”

You giggle, nodding as you feel the blood rush to your cheeks slightly.

“Okay, Tom. I promise.”

He presses one last kiss to your forehead and bends down to press another to your rounded belly. “Now Willow, you be good to Mum while I’m gone okay?”

He straightens up and drags his suitcase to the door.

“Tom?” you say, pulling his attention back to you. “Have fun, okay?” He grins. “Love you, darling.”

His footsteps and the thump of him dragging his suitcase down the stairs - pick the fucking suitcase up Tom, you’ll leave marks in the damn carpet - gently fade away until you’re left standing in his silent bedroom.

Sinking down into the duvet, you pick up your phone from the bedside table, opening up the groupchat with only you, Harrison, and Tuwaine.

Y/N: slumber party tonight? we can eat all tom’s food and trash his flat.

Tuwaine: hell yeah. i’m in.

Haz: i’ll bring snacks.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“Is it Harrison’s turn to pick the next movie?” asks Tuwaine as the credits begin to roll.

You and Harrison both groan, stretching out your limbs under the pile of blankets and pillows covering the living room.

“If I have to watch one more movie, I think I’ll straight up die,” you say.

“Yeah, my eyeballs are fucking square from staring at the TV,” adds Harrison, rubbing said eyes. “How about a game?”

Tuwaine snorts. “I love you both but I am NOT going to play Twister with you Haz. Or a very pregnant Y/N.”

“Ok, pass on the Twister then. How about truth or drink?” Harrison suggests.

You lift a hand. “Pregnant. No alcohol.”

“Truth or truth?” Haz continues.

Tuwaine shrugs. “I’m in if Y/N is.”

You shrug. “What's the worst that could happen? I gotta go pee first though.”

“You literally peed three times during the last movie,” sighs Harrison.

“Dude it was a long fucking movie, you try being pregnant,” you say as Tuwaine offers you a hand to help you up. “Two minutes and I’ll be back.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Fifteen minutes later you’re all situated in a small circle on the living room floor. In the dim light you can only make out the faces of Harrison and Tuwaine, still giggling from the last revelation.

“Y/N’s turn to ask Harrison.”

You pull a nearby pillow into your lap, gently rubbing your hand over the purple fabric as you pull an exaggerated thinking face.

“Hmmm,”

“Oh God Y/N, I do not like the look on your face right now,” groans Harrison.

You giggle at the panicked look on his face as he anticipates your next question.

“Have you ever cheated on a girlfriend?”

You expect it to be an easy question, a straight no from Harrison, but you’re shocked when he purses his lips together and looks down at the floor, refusing to make eye contact.

“Haz!” you whisper-scream, leaning in closer. “You haven’t! Please tell me you haven’t!”

Harrison says nothing. The silence is only broken by the crunch of Tuwaine popping another handful of popcorn into his mouth, eyes wide.

“It was a while ago, okay? I was super drunk and in a bad relationship…”

“That does not justify cheating! You are an absolute dick, Harrison Osterfield!” you try to sound outraged but the sheepish look on his face is just so funny to you and you can’t help but break into laughter. The sight of you giggling, hand covering your face and trying to keep yourself composed sets Tuwaine off and you lean into each other, both trying to shush each other.

“Okay, okay. This has taken a turn,” says Harrison quickly, trying to take control of the situation and get the focus off of himself.

"I think it's my turn to ask Y/N a question."

He strokes his chin in an exaggerated fashion, plotting how he can get you back for exposing him. "Oh!"

His eyes glint and you swallow, a little worried though. It's not like you have any crazy dark secrets to hide, though...

"Y/N Y/L/N. Do you have feelings for anyone?"

You gulp.

"Omitting the truth is one of the greatest sins of Truth or Truth," adds Tuwaine, grinning. "Do not disrespect the rules."

How are you going to get out of this one? What should you say? These guys know you better than almost anyone. They can see right through you if you try to lie.

"A certain brunette Brit, perchance?"

"Another thespian?" the boys taunt.

The thought of Tom makes a lump form in your throat. The memory of his rejection of you a few months ago still stings. You haven't allowed yourself to think of it much at all, but when Harrison asks it's like he's tearing open a wound you thought had scarred over. You blink back tears. Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, you will yourself. One tear slips down your cheek, and it's like the floodgates open.

"Okay, shut up about it would you? Yes, I have feelings for Tom, but I don't know what to do about it now that I'm pregnant and he says he's along for the ride. I'm so terrified of scaring him off-" you croak out, clutching onto the pillow in your lap.

"Oh shit," panics Harrison. "I'm so sorry Y/N, I didn't mean to make you cry or anything-"

"-but he doesn't like me back, and God it was so embarrassing when I asked, he looked at me like I was the most self-absorbed nut job out there, but I swear I've never felt this much about anyone."

Tuwaine beckons you over, wrapping a strong arm around you and pulling you into his chest. Harrison crawls around too, rubbing a soothing hand up and down your arm in apology. When you're able to stop crying, you reach up and wipe your nose on the corner of your hoodie sleeve.

"Y/N, babe, I don't want to make this any more confusing for you but I gotta tell you," says Tuwaine. "But Tom? That boy is absolutely whipped for you."

"What?" you shake your head. "No, I straight out asked him. He said he doesn't have feelings for me."

"Tuwaine's right," Harrison jumps in. "Tom's the guy I've known longest outside of my own family and trust me when I tell you he's absolutely crazy about you."

"he's clearly scared though," continues Tuwaine. "He values your friendship so much, but I promise you that if you tell him how you feel, he won't be able to lie anymore. And he'll have no reason to."

You glance up at the guys, sniffling.

"You think?"

Both boys nod, reaching out for handfuls of popcorn.

"Oh love, we know."

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

taglist: @lexilovesfez @justsomebodyweird @wildxwidow @sraholland @nothoughtsjustwriting @pickle-rick-y @spideyh0lland @myshaahmad77 @tuitiononlivings @wildholland @notanordinaryprincess95 @inthegetawaycarwithtaylah @let-me-luve-you @harrysharibo @sabnstyles @alwayssandy @livjaynekettle @hqllandxx @rogertherabbitt

[rphelperblog]

Chicago Med Rp Meme

inspired by @whomuses​

“What’s the difference between God and a doctor? God knows he’s not a doctor.”

“Every dumb, mean, stupid, vicious thing gets a light shown on it. The world would be a much better place, a much safer place, if people would just shut up.”

“Pride. It can literally kill you”

“People think sex is a touchy subject. Believe me, money is a lot touchier”

“You can’t erase things, but you can write over them.”

“Yeah, younger patients are the hardest. Very tough to draw a line between an actual disorder and good old fashioned adolescence.”

“Losing hope is not a sign of mental illness. It’s a sign of being human.”

“I became a doctor to save peoples lives!”

“In any case, the problem’s been resolved, and we can get back to business, saving lives, making money.”

“Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not after you.”

“Another maniac going crazy in a theater. This the world we live in?”

“Try thinking like a doctor and not like a pregnant woman.”

You have my permission to go ahead as long as you can do so safely.”

Oh my gosh. Is everyone all right?”

Nobody’s dead.”

Great. When were you going to tell me?”

Maybe I just got tired of hearing the sound of my own voice.”

You hired a nurse for a reason.”

It's my decision! And I don't appreciate you trying to recruit more soldiers to your cause.”

No, I don't want to talk to my husband directly. That's why I hired a lawyer.”

I know you judge me, but in my country I was persecuted. I had to flee.”

I'm a surgeon. Show some respect.”

Those girls would have gone to someone else. At least I know what I'm doing.”

Hate me. Hate me as much as you want, bro. But I ain't walking away til I geet your consent for the surgery.”

Stop telling me things I already know.”

That you got off the black market because you don't have a license.”

I thought you said they were trying to help.”

How long have you been an alcoholic?”

You don't beat around the bush.”

They didn't do anything wrong. They shouldn't be punished.”

we can't let this play out in the media. The court that's really going to matter is the court of public opinion.”

That's quite a look. You enjoying hitting the lanes?”

It's mostly a fashion statement, but I do enjoy rolling a ball once in a while.”

Good. One less crisis to worry about but this guy's still trying to die.”

So you're putting me in purgatory instead?”

Okay. So we're on safe ground legally. What about morally?”

You are, but we're running out of time.”

How are your 15 minutes going?”

Yep. And two vaccinated, consenting adults.”

An innocent little baby had to suffer while there are a bunch of crooks in this world who get away with everything.”

For a soldier to ask for help, for a soldier to be afraid they might be one of 'them', that they could fall apart at any second.”

I think of people like you, people who served over there. You have so much courage, but when it comes to saving yourselves...”

Poor little girl. What did she ever do to deserve this?”

Is this gonna keep happening? Is it gonna get worse?”

I would too. That's why I like it down here. I'm -- I'm not good with suffering. It's just...too much up there.”

Nice fricking move. Right on sister. I knew you were smart.”

He's given me so much. How do I ever pay that back? “

How do you know you haven't already?”

I guess we're all given our measure of suffering. God's medicine”

I promise, from now on, I'll never argue with you.”

You will be an attending, so you won't have to argue with me. You can just boss me around.”

My fear is, is that you're gonna find a way to get yourself kicked off the staff. I'm curious to see how long it'll take.”

You dope. Nobody overrules him.”

Damned if you do and damned if you don't. I admit, it's a bit of a double standard. What can I say?”

I'm pretty sure that if that were me, I'd be raked over the coals by you right now.”

It doesn't have to make sense to us. If he believed he would longer if his wounds were dressed in green bandages, then we give him green bandages.”

Oh, come on, they barely have the energy to play canasta...whatever that is.”

It's not my job to listen. I'm a doctor. It's my job to decide what's best for him. “

You know, there's a reason for that. There's this new study out, says dating can lead to marriage.”

It's just a friendly dinner.”

Wonderful, the guy enforcing the rules is the one who's always breaking them.”

I suspect it was ego more than altruism. Great surgeons know the balance. You're confident, not arrogant. I like that,”

he totally snores, but I don't mind. Oh, he does this thing where he shoots his dirty boxers into the hamper like a buzzer beater. [beat] Anyway, it's cute.”

totally snores, but I don't mind. Oh, he does this thing where he shoots his dirty boxers into the hamper like a buzzer beater. [beat] Anyway, it's cute.

And discipline? Is that a nice way of saying I'm a tight ass?”

What you're doing may be legal, but it sure as hell isn't right. “

This is an emotional process. I can understand you're upset.”

Is this a happy ending?”

you think you know better...sounds like something you'd bust my balls for.”

This is why we all worked so hard to send you to medical school? So you could keep a bunch of party animals from getting hangovers?”

You've got to be kidding me. Ginger Spice is our doctor!”

Some idiot in supply added a zero to my order, so instead of four dozen, I...”

I always kind of envied the kids who went to church. You know, they were part of something. It's like they had their own tribe.

Oh, family drama, now you're in my wheelhouse!

You're family. We rise and fall together.

Only as often as the state requires.

So they ever give you guys breaks?

Then again, how many jobs are there where you literally get to save lives? 

Hey, take it from a former alter boy. Baptism's a piece of cake. A lot easier than a bris.

But I'm not religious. Wouldn't it be hypocritical?

Eh, think of it like a vaccination. Do it and get it over with.

Do you know the single greatest challenge that I face is trying to convince people that depression isn't a sign of weakness?

You're a good doctor. The world needs good doctors, you ass.

You don't like Chicago style popcorn? 

Mixing caramel and cheese flavors?

Sweet and salty. It's the greatest duo.

you're my brother, and I love you. But you need to grow up.

Why do you always take things out on me?

You know, when I'm faced with a snarling dog, I try to remind myself it's self-preservation that's making him show his teeth.

You don't have to show me how smart you are. And you don't have to please me. Just learn.

I've been an ass. Not just today -- since last week. Before that. I should not have yelled at you.

You? Wrong? Amazing.

Boy's will always want to be better than their fathers, which is precisely what their fathers want.

Oh, come on -- sport's the oldest form of group therapy. We yell, we scream. Testosterone spikes. Every now and then, we even get to believe in a miracle.

People do that sometimes. They sense they're at the end and they just want to die in a clean bed.

He saw something. You'll have to ask him when he wakes up.

This is not about you. This about *her* and what *she* wanted.

[rebsrams]

A case of you (Ethan x F!MC)  part II

Book: Open Heart

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey and MC (Dr. Rebecca Valentine)

Warnings: none. Just utterly romantic fluff.

Summary: part II of my fic A case of you. Find part I here.

Word count: 1,377   

@openheartfanfics​

"On the back of a cartoon coaster

In the blue TV screen light

I drew a map of Canada

Oh, Canada

With your face sketched on it twice"

Then he saw her.

Just standing there, in the gloomy blue reflection of the tv placed on a shelf above her head.

She was swiping her finger delicately on the rim of the glass, a few coppery curls partially blocking her view.

He noticed than she had a map of some place he didn't recognize from that distance, with something sketched upon it, a few lines which from where he was standing didn't make any sense. 

"Rookie."

He called for her, breathless from the run and completely stunned by her natural beauty. 

But most of all, he was thankful to see her there, still waiting for him.

She looked up, her eyes glimmering with surprise and pure joy.

She hadn't heard him call her like that in a really long time, and suddenly they both someway felt brought like a rush to the start of it all.

That first day at the hospital, the first nights they gazed at each other through glasses of scotch on the rocks with the chattering of her friends in the background.

The coffees they secretly shared, because he couldn't stand that anyone else knew the existence of his precious and miracolous coffee machine.

That night spent together next to baby Ethan, while Ethan senior was still grieving for the loss of his mother.

That was the night he knew that anything was the same anymore. 

That he couldn't live peacefully without her.

 And he wouldn't. 

She immediately stood up, her lower lip already trembling for the excitement. "Dr. Ramsey." she managed to say, voice shaking and weak in the knees. 

She dreamed so much about this moment. 

She knew he was gonna tell her something that was going to change her life, for better of for worse. 

They finally met in front of the table, merely a couple of inches between them. He just gazed into her eyes, afraid that by saying anything he would have ruined the incredible moment they were living.

 A moment of awareness.

 "Listen, Ethan, you don't really have to say anything at all, I-I'm incredibily sorry for what..."

"I love you." 

The sentence cut into her clumsy speech like a shard of glass, sudden and sure. Eyes wide and gaping, a thin "what?" was everything she could actually manage to say in return. 

He quickly took her by the shoulders, as if to shake some sense into her, and repeated, even more sure than before: "I love you, Rebecca. Your clumsiness, and your incredible kindness, and altruism, your impatience and the little wrinkle on your forehead that it causes you when you have to wait for an important result. I love that you always take the same time to come to my office after I paged you, always a little breathless because you ran up the stairs to be quicker. I love your freshness, and the incredible irony you have, worthy of your stunning mind. I love the fire that you hold inside, igniting you from the bone, even when it's directed towards me." at that point,she let out a small chuckle, beginning to sniff loudly. 

"I love that you're so emotional" he continued, wiping her tears with his thumb "that you cried all night after that one of your long time patients left the hospital for good because you could heal him. I love you, Rebecca. And I don't want to hide anymore." 

Now, he was cupping her cheeks with both of his big and warm hands. 

"Are you going to make my heart stop?" she said, nearly choking with her tears. "Couldn't you just... I don't know, deliver the news in small doses?" 

Now was his turn to chuckle, a giggle which turned into a deeply laugh that filled his chest. 

"What was that saying of yours... Go big or go home, right?"

Just like he imagined, she threw her arms around his neck and began to pepper his face with kisses, until their mouths finally encountered in what seemed the seal to a silent pact. 

No more lies. No more running.

They stood there, in each other's arms, foreheads touching and inebriated grins on their faces for what seemed an eternity.

Eventually, they sat to share a drink together, cherishing the moment a little more.

"What is it that you have there?"

He pointed to the map she was sketching upon, catching her cheeks turning red.

"Oh, just a little... Nothing, really"

He could easily smell the lie, picking the map of what looked like...

"Canada? And... Is it my face that you were drawing?"

"It's a long story."

"I have plenty of time. Plus, I'm not going anywhere." he said, kissing the back of her hand.

She let out a long sigh.

"Well, long story short... I was offered a job at the Toronto General hospital, a few days ago. I must admit that I really thought about moving my residency there, escaping from my problems and starting a new life. I even bought this map yesterday, hoping it would have gave me the courage to finally face the decision.Then... I found myself sketching your face on it, twice, and hoping that you wouldn't forget me once I got away. That you could forgive me, if I went there. Now I'm so ashamed... I just want to dig deep and hide!"

She let go of his hand and dug both hands in the mess of her curls, a dismayed expression on her face.

"Rebs, sweetheart. I should be the one ashamed, here. You have to forgive me. For the way I treated you, for backing away when you needed me the most, for being so fucking scared of making you suffer just by being by your side that I hurt you anyway. That is a thing I could never forgive myself for, but you have to. I couldn't live otherwise."

He tilted her chin up to make her face him, giving her a quick nod.

"Let me take you home." he said almost in a whisper.

Now was her turn to nod, a brief smile hanging loose on her lips.

"You're in my blood like holy wine

You taste so bitter and so sweet, ohI could drink a case of you

Still I'd be on my feet

Oh, I would still be on my feet"

Three years later, Dr. Ethan Ramsey was sitting on the couch of his apartment, her wife's head in the slope of his neck while he gently caressed her belly, swollen by six months of pregnancy.

"Judy, dear, I already told you that you'll have to wait a little longer before meeting us. We're quite impatient too, your mommy especially, but that is no reason to kick the hell out of her." Ethan whispered softly to her womb.

"Ethan! That's not quite the way to talk to a baby, you know."

While playfully reproaching him, she shuffled his hair in a way that made his heart melt like the first time she laid her hands on him.

"Maybe we should blame it on the alcohol. I think that three glasses of that pinot noir i drank with Naveen this evening had me quite dizzy. I still can't imagine how a man of his age who once was on the verge of death and ready to let everything go could take the alcohol that way."

"Maybe it's my presence that makes you so dizzy, uh? I saw you enter that door quite decently just half an hour ago." she mocked him, remembering him stumble through the doorstep.

"Trust me, my dear, you're the only thing that's keeping me on my feet and going. You, and this funny little thing in here" 

He kissed her belly affectionately, unspoken prayers carried with the simplicity of that gesture. 

"Have I ever told you that I love you, Doctor Ethan Jonah Ramsey?" she replied, giving him a peck on the lips.

Something about his full name said by her wife's full lips filled him with pride and a touch of lust that he could never resist, no matter how hard he tried.

"Quite a few times, I guess."

With a swift movement, despite her several months of pregnancy and his actual dizziness, he lift her up and brought her to their bedroom, ready to cherish her once more as he always did since that night of three years before. 

Aaaand here we go! Hope you liked the second part.

I had a lot of fun writing this.

Feel free to report any mistake (as I already said, I’m not a native speaker and I’d really like to improve, so your help is more than well received!)

Also, I’m trying to gather a taglist, so let me know if you’re interested in my writing and want to stay up to date on my MC adventures!

[myinnersoul1412]

Hatori Novel Smexy scene 1

I'm not good at drawing, and I'm good at writing either so I hope this could somewhat serve at a present for fellow Domestica fans on Hatori’s birthday

Please note that it's translated by Google translate + a few more translator+ some common sense or interpretation so please take it with a grain of salt. I don't know Japanese beyond the basic characters but I'm just doing it because I love them so much

Even though the translation probably sucks, please don’t bring it anywhere since I spent a ton of time on it and just want to share.

Prior to this scene, Hatori and Yoshino were on a date at to collect materials for the manuscript. The setting is on Christmas’eve. They went to a Chinese restaurant to eat together, and while the food was good, Yoshino commented that Tori’s food was still better. During the meal, Hatori had to step outside for a work phone call because a newbie author (female, 2nd year college) wanted to ask his opinion on her storyboard.

Funny note: Hatori hated taking pictures but still posed as models for Yoshino to take pics anyway. 

Some touching lines:

Speaking of the real intention, it is not without thinking that this convenient dream will be awakened by the sudden impetus. The end may come someday, but I'm still going to enjoy this happiness. Even if this comes to an end some day, now that you have enjoyed all this happiness, even if you wake up from a dream, you will never forget it.

(If I say this to Yoshino, the him from way before would have been stunned **)

He secretly smiles at his self-ridicule. Of course, he wants to be with Yoshino his whole life.

As long as he’s allowed to be by his side, he’s not going to leave.It's just that that feeling and his wish for Yoshino's happiness are a little different. In the unlikely event that Hatori’s presence could be a burden or have a negative effect, he intends to behave accordingly. It is a commandment to himself.

This smexy scenes comes after their date. Enjoy!

Because this year progress is not desperate, there are no assistants coming in and out, and Yanase should be stuck at the seinenshi’s sensei place.(T/N: magazine for young men)

 “Well then. Don't stay up late today and go to bed early. Good luck with the manuscript tomorrow”  

“…………”

For some reason, Yoshino didn't try to step out, even though Hatori tried to see him off at the branch road to his home. On the contrary, he was pinching Hatori’s coat and holding it down.

“Yoshino?”

Yoshino’s cheeks that were looking down were slightly red. It didn't look like he was drunk, but could it be the afterglow of alcohol? 

“------You know. Normally, you wouldn’t go home on a day like this?”

“?”

 He didn't understand what Yoshino was saying, and the former had a perplexed face. In response to such a dull reaction from Hatori, Yoshino stamped his feet on the ground.

 “So! You're back from a date!”

 I looked(T/N: look, but with eyes wide open) at Yoshino who raised his voice frustratingly. I couldn’t hide the surprise that Yoshino also perceived today as a date.  

 “What’s with that face! Even though you can add embarrassing scenes to a plot, what do you mean you can't do it in real life……”

 Yoshino murmured the dissatisfying words. I rubbed my eyes to see if I was having a convenient dream, but it seemed to be reality.

 “I want to confirm, that is to say ---”

 “Read the mood in times like this!”

 He held his breath against Yoshino who glared at him with a red face.  

 (This is……is it okay to accept the invitation……?)

 In retrospect, today's Yoshino was somewhat strange from the beginning. I wondered if it might even snow, but I would be troubled if he got angry.  

 “Can I stay the night?”

 “………”

 When asked straight, Yoshino dyed red to his neck and nodded a little.  

Both of them were silent on their way to Yoshino’s room. Every step I took made me feel more nervous. My body temperature gradually rose, even though the cold night breeze was brushing my cheeks.

“Ah? Where did I put the key?”

 Yoshino panicked in front of the room. He was just looking at the pockets in his coat and trousers, and he seemed to be forgetting the bag on his shoulder.  

 “Is it there in your bag pocket?”

 “R-right”

 The fingers that opened the zipper were trembling. Yoshino, who had no sense of control, dropped the key. The sound of bumpy metal crashed into the hallway.

 “I'll open it”

 Hatori picked up the key and opened the front door. At that moment, Yoshino felt small and seemed to be holding his breath.  

 “Thank- thank you”

 Open the door and encourage Yoshino to enter first. Yoshino’s movement walking in front of me started to feel more jerky.  

 “Um, do you want something to drink?”

 The voice which asked the question was trembling too. Even though I was just nervous, it seemed like Yoshino's tension was infectious.  

 I guessed I should have gotten used to it, since we had already done it so many times, but I didn’t want to look so dismayed in front of the person I liked.

 “No”

 “Ah, then how about a shower?

 “……Ah”

 His pink nape caused the little amount of reason remaining in me to give away. I held Yoshino’s shoulders, turned him around, and strongly kissed him.

 “Nnn……?”

 Perhaps surprised by Hatori's brute force, Yoshino’s eyes were wide open. However, immediately, the body’s tension was released and his eyelids lowered.  Eating his lips and twisting his tongue, Yoshino put his hands on Hatori's back. As the kiss deepened, the more they clung into each other.(T/N: literal translation is “the stronger the clinging force became”)

 “Nnn,n,nn……”

Embracing Yoshino's body, which was gradually melting, I became absorbed and devoured his lips. Every time I entangled my tongue, I heard a wet sound. I teased his tongue which was trying to entangle awkwardly, and enjoyed the mouth that was hotter than usual. I wanted to continue more, but when I noticed Yoshino who seemed to be suffocating, I broke the kiss with the feeling that my back hair was getting pulled.  

“……Stupid, we're still in the hallway”

Yoshino complained while being out of breath. Hatori strongly pulled Yoshino’s waist, who was glaring up at him with flushed cheeks, and whispered into his ear.  

 “It’s your fault for stirring me up(t/n: to stir up, to incite, to agitate). And you were responding, too”

 “That, that was just conditioned reflex……”

 “Is that so?”

 “What do you want to say!”

 “I didn’t say anything”

 “There's something written all over your face”  

 It was a sulking look, but there was sweetness in the gaze (T/N: not very sure about this part). Towards Yoshino who showed a sullen face due to the embarrassment, sadistic desires were aroused.

 “What is written, can you tell me carefully?”

 “Eh?-----Uwa”

 Heading to the bedroom while holding the waist, they fell into the bed entangled together.

 “Oi Tori----------”

 Fueled by Yoshino's moist eyes, he kissed him again as if he was being sucked in. He repeated the devouring kisses and ran his hands over Yoshino's clothes. While sighing and moaning into the sealed kiss, I pinned down and felt around/groped the thin body. Rolling up the inner knitwear, I touched his bare skin.

 I managed to get rid of the coat, and I was frustrated by the difficulty of movement while loosening the belt, and realized that I had not even taken off my jacket yet.

 (I really can't afford it)

 Internally, Hatori laughed bitterly at his impatience. He roughly stripped off his coat and jacket, which normally would have been dutifully hung, and pulled out his tie.  

 “Hey, slow down a bit………”

 “I can't”

 “Then try harder!”

If you answered immediately, you would get a retort from Yoshino. When I stroked around the area where Yoshino’s ribs had previously floated, Yoshino stirred under Hatori. It was still a bit thin, but it had gained a lot of flesh after all my daily efforts.

 “I'm deeply moved/very emotional that I've come to be able to grab it”

 “Oi, hey, don’t rub it……!”

 When Hatori grabbed his side, Yoshino wriggled ticklishly.  

“Then, how about here?”  

“Hya—”

He moved his hand further up, gently stroked the tip of his chest with the pad of his thumb, and then crushed it, a shrill voice escaped Yoshino's lips.The ticklish Yoshino was sensitive here too. When stimulated, it easily hardened. 

“Ah, mmm, ouch, stupid, not so hard”

 “You like it when it hurts, don't you?”  

 When you pinched it, the body jumped.

 “Ahh, n,nnn……!”

 When I knead it with some strength, it reddened like a fruit, and Yoshino rubbed his knees together as if frustrated. It looked like his nipples weren’t the only things getting hard.  

 When I forcibly split his knees and pressed my leg against his groins, I felt a hard tantalizing touch.

 “Ugh.... ah, wait, ah, ah”

 Rubbing it with your thigh made it even more tense. Hatori pushed down Yoshino's pants, which had been loosened at the waist. His underwear had changed color at some parts.

 “You're already wet”

 When I told him the fact, Yoshino turned red to his ears.  

 “W-Well, I'm not the only one... ah”

 “Maybe so”  

 “Ah……!?”

 He ran his index finger over the elastic of Yoshino’s underwear and lightly pulled it down, revealing a taut member. Hatori traced up the warped underside and scooped the moistened tip with his fingertips.

 “Ahh, ah………”

 When I wrapped my fingers around the whole cock and rubbed it gently, Yoshino let out a sweet and seductive/mellow voice. His appearance when clutching the bedsheet and enduring the pleasure was lovely.

 (How cute/How lovely)  

 He was usually sloppy, and he was quick to whine, but at the root of Yoshino's character is a stubbornness that hated to lose. Once he had made a decision, no matter what, he was not going to change it.

 “Yoshino, take that off”

 “Get ready first, you idiot...”

 While rebuking Hatori, Yoshino reached into a drawer on the sideboard. He found what he was looking for, and embarrassed to present something that could be used on him, he carelessly pressed it against my chest.  

 “Thank you”

 The bottle of lotion and the box of contraceptives that he had ready were new. I wondered what kind of expression did Yoshino buy these things with.

Resisting the urge to pursue the answer, I took the content in the palm of my hand. Making sure to squeeze it and spread it all over my fingers, I wrapped around his excitement again.  

 “Hya……ah,ah……!”

 When I made it slimy up and down, Yoshino's moan became even sweeter. After making it feel as tight as it could be, I probed behind with my wet fingers.  

 “Mmm,mm”

Yoshino sighed when I forcibly pushed my fingertips into the tightly closed place. He didn’t realize that he was tightening his limbs, but I pushed my fingers deeper and deeper.

 “Ngh,nghh……”

 Yoshino clenched his teeth as he endured the sensation of being probed inside his body.  It was not originally designed to accept foreign substances, but he slowly got used to it as lotion was added several times along the way.  Every time I pulled my finger in and out, a lewd squelching sound was heard.  

 “Ah…ah,ah……mm”

Yoshino's hands wandered around on the bed looking for something to cling to. Eventually, he grabbed a pillow and pulled it over to bury his face in it. Realizing that he didn’t want to let out his voice, I moved my fingers even more.  

 “Ah, ah, ah……!”  

 With increased fingers, I pushed hard against the inner wall and Yoshino's body jumped like a fish on land. I could tell that he was getting pleasure from the melting moans/charming moans.  

 I already knew all of Yoshino’s sensitive spots. I couldn’t afford to tease him today. Just tortured severely the spots where he would surely react.  

 “No, not only there, ahhh, ah!”  

 Yoshino wasn’t negative/contradictory about getting pleasure, but when he felt too good, he suddenly got scared.  I could understand the uneasiness of feeling like I was no longer myself. But I had no intention of toning it down.(T/N: other possible meanings: keeping it moderate/mild)

 “Aahh, no, ah, ah----!?”  

 The root of the arousal that was about to burst was tightened and the i that would have been risen was suppressed. Yoshino, who was going to be released, stared at Hatori with an agitated expression/ in turmoil.  

 “W-why……”  

 “You can hold it a bit more right?”  

 If I made him come first on a tiring day, he often fell asleep immediately after that. As expected, it would be a problem if that were to happen today.  I was already painfully tense. It wouldn’t be easy to take care of it alone.  

 “You have to take responsibility for the invitation”

 “Ahh……”  

 As I pulled out the fingers that were probing inside, a sweet, trembling voice escaped. I had feared it might still be a little tight, but my patience had already reached the limit.  

 “Are you ready?”(T/N: “Is it okay?”)

 “……Do whatever you want”(T/N: ……Suit yourself”)  

 With Yoshino's permission, I pushed open his knees. I restlessly loosened my waist and pulled my excited self out from the underwear.  I quickly put on the condom and when I fit into the prepared spot, the body temperature and pulsation were transmitted vividly.

 “Ah------”  

 I pushed the tip in with a huff. Running out of patience, I shoved in mercilessly.  Although it was still narrow/tight as he thought, but it had already learned Hatori’s shape and accepted him without refusal.  

 I secretly let out a sigh from the pleasure of being wrapped in the soft mucous membrane.

 “Nghh……why……why is it so big……ngh”  

 Yoshino glared at me resentfully with teary eyes. This might be more of a whining rather than a complaint. I was embarrassed to be complained about the body’s physiological reaction. It wasn’t something that could be controlled by reason.  

 “Of course it's because I want you. There isn’t any guy who’s not excited about holding someone he loves”  

“Idiot ......ngh”

 It was unreasonable to be spit a verbal abuse at like that even though I answered his question. In a fit of anger, I forcefully pushed it to the root, and cloudy whiteness was scattered by the momentum/impetus/force.

 “Ahh……ngh”

 He seemed to have come just by stimulation at the back because he was made to endure it earlier. The bodily fluid overflowing from the explosion was scattered across the thin abdomen.

 “I didn't say that you could come first right?”

 “B-but……”

 I wiped the overflowing bodily fluids with my fingers and treat Yoshino's arousal as if to smear it. I rubbed it hard, and it got tighter there with Hatori inside.

 “Ahh, ah, no, I’m going to come again……”

 “That won’t do. It's better if we come together right?”

 “Yeah ... but ...ngh”

 “You can't hold it for me?”

 “Meany Tori……Uh, ah, ah, nghh, ngh!”  

 What Yoshino said not to do was the same as what he said he wanted you to do. The reaction inside changed depending on the intensity of the stimulus. As I was enjoying the change, I was complained to by Yoshino, who was on the verge of tears.

“No, idiot, don't play anymore……ngh”  

 “You want me to focus more here?”

 “Ahngh!?”  

 I gave a hard shove at the place where our bodies connected.  

 “No, ahhh, ah, ah……ngh”

 I put myself into the root and shook up our connected bodies. Every time I sent my hips in, Yoshino's body jolted and trembled. I grabbed Yoshino's waist and held him up, bending his back heavily, and stirred his lotion-soaked wet insides mercilessly.

 “Ahhngh, ahh, no……ngh”  

While greedily gouging out the tangled mucous membranes, I drilled into the back again and again. When I sent my hip into the right place, Yoshino gasped as if to cry. That voice and expression further fueled Hatori. Hatori threw off his self-control and thrust up Yoshino in his lust.

 “Agh,ahh,ahhng,aah!”  

 At first, Yoshino was at my mercy, but gradually he started to move. It was unintentional, and probably unconscious. It was a pleasure that flew off all reasons, and he was trying to get more of it. Even if it was an act of instinct, it didn’t change what the expectation was.

 What Yoshino wanted, I just gave him exactly that

 (--------I’m really sly/cunning)  

 Every time I hold Yoshino like this, I felt indescribable elation and guilt.

All Yoshino must have had for Hatori, until the later revealed his hidden lust, were the feelings of comfort, friendship, and trust of a childhood friend. There might have been some sort of monopoly, but it probably wasn't that of love. I dragged Yoshino to this side, imposed my not-so-pretty desires on him, and instilled lust.

Even if Yoshino had had such experience, it was with the opposite sex and he was not in the receiving position. As a man, there must have been some confusion for him. Nevertheless, it was thanks to his generosity that he had accepted the position of being embraced on the receiving end.

He might not be aware of it himself, but Yoshino was the one who had the gut when the time came. Hatori's prudence was a mask to hide his mean, negative and cowardly self.

 “Ah! Not there, no, aghn, ah, aghn!”

 "Can't you say anything other than denial once in a while?"

 “Sh-shut up…..nghh”

 When I pointed out his lack of vocabulary, he glared at me with moist eyes. He usually had a face that didn’t seem to have anything to do with sexual things. But when he was embraced, he had such a face, so I couldn’t stand it. As I repeatedly thrust into the back, the connected part became loose. At that moment, I pulled myself out as much as I could and pushed it in.

 “Aaahhh……ngh”

With each extraction, the voice that spilled out became sweeter and sweeter. As I continued to gouge out the tightly-clung inner walls, Yoshino's face became distorted with pleasure.

 “You like it here right?”

“Yes, it feels good……nghh”  (T/N: Alternative: I like it. It feels good)

The reason why I deliberately asked the question when reason had failed was because I could hear an honest answer now.

 “Here?”  

 “Ughahh, ah,ah, ah….ngh”

 Yoshino, who was writhing and gasping, was driven even harder. When he squirmed and swayed, the thin body slid up on the bed.  

 “No, nghh, agnh, ah, ah……!”

Vigorously pulling his hips closer and thrusting even deeper. Yoshino also tangled his legs around Hatori's waist and clung to his back.  His lips came close to mine as if a pleading from Yoshino. Biting and kissing, I devoured on the impulse/urge.

 “Nn,n,n,nn……ngh”

 As I rocked my hips with our bodies close together, Yoshino's erection, which was overflowing with semen, rubbed against my abdomen. It seemed that the limit was already in sight.

When I parted my lips, there was a face right there that looked like it was about to burst into tears.

 “Tori……ngh, already, I’m coming, please……nghh”

In the blink of an eye, a single tear fell from Yoshino's eyes. I thought I'd tease him more, but I changed my mind on that expression.

“I know”

 Immediately, I increased the pace and caught up with Yoshino.  

 “Ahh, ahh, ah……ngh”  

 “-------Chiaki”

 “AH-----!?”

After an intense urging, they came almost simultaneously. Yoshino's lower abdomen quivered intermittently, overflowing with white turbidity.

 “Ah, nn……ngh”

 Then, after Hatori poured all the proof of his desire into Yoshino, he also pulled himself out. We remained silent, waiting for the heat to recede from our bodies. As I closed my eyes and surrendered to the pleasant exhaustion, Yoshino opened his mouth with rough breathing.

“……I've been meaning to tell you this for a while”

“Hm?”

“It’s foul play to call my name like that!”

Yoshino caught his breath, then paused, and grudgingly complained in Hatori's ear.

Personal notes: Hatori’s monologue is so sad omgg...the scene is like both sexy and hurt at the same time...what a writer

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: 💕 Janis: feeling the love 'cos corporate making ya, hey? Janis: how many holiday drinks you made today Jimmy: feels like billions Jimmy: not the kinda wrist action to be #buzzing about Janis: here's hoping you working commission lad Janis: is any? 🤔 #hotdatewithjane Jimmy: Tam's been in and out all day earning you those kicks you desire Jimmy: #notsosecretadmirer Jimmy: can't stay away on this special day Janis: Christ, you'd think she wouldn't wanna be seen DEAD outside her house, single, on this most sacred day Janis: gotta be stringing her along with lingering just a little too long when handing over the caffeine, good job babe 👏 Janis: think Grace is lowkey in hiding Janis: too late to even frantically swipe right on tinder now ladies Jimmy: Tell her Bobby'll be round Jimmy: He would if date night wasn't past his bedtime like Janis: 😂 bless Janis: all got our cross to bear, kid Janis: can't get my date out without a leash and promises of treats 🤷 Jimmy: Speaking of bitches, I seen Mia's timed her latest for the stockholm syndrome to kick in right on time Janis: look, i know you're bitter 'cos i've chucked you for better but don't bad mouth the bae, ok? Janis: forreal tho, they have schedules, like clockwork Janis: a new man for every occasion, this one won't last 'til her bday Jimmy: Keeping my hands where Tams can't see or cuff 'em Janis: 😏 tmi Janis: and unhygienic to boot, you serve lattes with those hands Jimmy: filthy 🧠 Jimmy: it's the company you keep Jimmy: Twix's gone from trying to shit in my dad's shoes to humping 'em Janis: whoa now, i didn't teach her that Janis: but think about it, from a scatological foot fetish to just a bit of vanilla pre-teen humping of inanimate objects Janis: it IS a step in the right direction Jimmy: But you are about treating 'em mean to keep 'em keen Janis: Your kicks are safe, dun' worry Janis: if she's taught me anything, not the way into the good books 😇 Jimmy: If you wanna aim for my work shoes I won't complain Jimmy: A day off is a day off Jimmy: Warn me first though, unless you're into those kind of surprises Janis: Best not to be seen with each other today Janis: don't wanna give everyone the wrong idea Janis: but nice try, you'll have to stick to burning yaself and the like if you wanna bunk Jimmy: Tammy's bound to help me with that Jimmy: #likeagiraffeonice Janis: She's beauty, she's graces Janis: wants you to cum all over her face Jimmy: fingers crossed she'll melt mine off first Jimmy: Better with that Janis: fair Janis: no way you've got the reach Jimmy: 💕 #whenbaebelievesinyou Janis: what, you want me to offer help with target practice? Janis: nice try dickhead 😜 Jimmy: Romance isn't dead there's the proof Jimmy: What are you doing today, aside from belly rubs for the bae Janis: gotta do something, don't I? feel bad like Janis: slayed the gift game and I really phoned it in so obvs gotta give out those sexual favours Janis: nowt though, trying to avoid seeing all the lovey-dovey couples making me wanna vom Janis: letting Tam work her magic in peace 😘 welcome like Jimmy: 💔🐶🎻 Jimmy: Making drinks with my eyes closed 'cause same Jimmy: Crack on Tam #tallgirlsneedlovetoo Janis: any barista will do 🎶 Janis: wanna hang when the madness is over Jimmy: The way this queue is going there isn't gonna be goodies left to bring you Jimmy: But I'm sweet enough😎 Jimmy: So yeah Janis: Bummer Janis: guess I can't kick you outta bed for that alone Janis: let you tot up negatives throughout the day, standard Jimmy: Got a pen behind my ear Jimmy: Come at me Janis: never could resist a challenge Janis: 🙄 walked into that one Janis: can we do something not shit Janis: don't need to see you slurping down spaghetti lady and the tramp stylee Jimmy: 💔 I'll shoo away all the strays I've gathered Jimmy: Only one dog for you like Jimmy: But of course that's how we stay goals Jimmy: any old shit won't do 💪🏆 Janis: 🎻 Janis: okay good Janis: play your cards right and get it right Janis: i'll spring for the motel 😉 Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: for once i'll be rooting for you Janis: my parents are unbearable at the best of times Janis: 🤢 Janis: actually cannot deal Jimmy: My dad and his girlfriend are still early days enough that they can bear to be in the same room Jimmy: I won't fail Janis: oh the honeymoon period Janis: disgusting Janis: thank god we got that out of the way with a fake relationship so you know my true feelings 😏 Jimmy: yeah thanks mate Jimmy: 👍 Janis: welcome, buddy o' pal o' mine Jimmy: Done Jimmy: I've worked it out Janis: taking a particularly difficult shit? Janis: again, don't need these intimate updates honey Janis: not #goals Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: No, what's goals is what we're gonna do, babe 😏 Jimmy: Keeping you outta the house 'til there's no cringe factor left Janis: Ahh Janis: colour me intrigued Jimothy Janis: what's the dress code? Jimmy: 🤔 Jimmy: Nothing Tam would be seen dead in Janis: Alright, no body con that shows all my worst bits, gotcha Janis: do I get ANY clues? Curious 🙀 right here Jimmy: You might just make yourself a new bae Jimmy: But pace yourself mate Janis: 😳 Janis: i don't own any PVC clothing, you know that, yeah? Jimmy: I do now 🎻 Janis: 😂 can literally hear Gracie in my head asking me what i'm like rn Janis: letting ya man down on vday Janis: honestly Jimmy: when one twin's a giver and the other's a taker 😂 Janis: tbf, we BOTH told you you'd got the wrong one but Janis: cloth ears you Jimmy: Down for the challenge Jimmy: Too late to not be a stubborn dickhead, me Janis: looks like we're both stuck then, lad Jimmy: there's that #realtalk mate Janis: can't say we didn't both give it a fair go Janis: #longdistanceloveinskerries #teenagerunaway Jimmy: You'll always have Twix 💕 Janis: gotta have someone to rely on init Jimmy: #tea Janis: #scaldedagain #jobhazard Jimmy: [Sends a selfie of an actual burn/on the job hazard] Jimmy: Stuff of fantasies that Janis: Poor baby! Has Tam not offered to 💋 it better? Janis: #slacking Jimmy: She's got her 👀 a bit lower down Jimmy: I'm just a piece of 🍖 Jimmy: The real hazard Janis: start a # about it Janis: 'cos can't blame her Janis: part of the problem, truly Jimmy: Will do Janis: being all distracting there with your apron and that Janis: asking for it Jimmy: I thought it was the shoes Jimmy: Sexy from head to toe like Jimmy: 🐶💗 Janis: 😋 something certainly got tongues n tails wagging Jimmy: 😎 Jimmy: The company I keep, I think 😉 Janis: valid, the bitches love me 😍 Jimmy: Alright, save it for the 'gram Jimmy: #humblebrag Janis: Twix is a busy lady, only got you scheduled in so far Janis: guess the fans will have to make do with your mug 😜 Jimmy: unlucky lads and lasses Janis: they love it Janis: 'til some other cunt is unlucky enough to be enrolled in our school, you're gonna stay flavour of the month 🍦 Jimmy: 💪🥇 Janis: meanwhile, i gotta wait 'til the next fam scandal 'til I'm relevant again Janis: such is life Janis: not that its ever THAT long 🙄 Jimmy: Whip up some fake drama for you to hide in if you want Jimmy: Crack 'em out with the lattes Janis: I don't doubt you're capable Janis: just getting over sinkgate 😏 Mr. Lucas never will 😉 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: He's one of the only dickheads who hasn't been in today Jimmy: Still time 🤞 Janis: think a milky earl grey is his shout Janis: get it ready, really impress him Janis: more than you did, obvs Jimmy: The coffee breath and forehead vein says espresso though 🤔 Jimmy: Man o mystery Janis: 🤤 Janis: so hot Jimmy: More competition is it? Jimmy: 💔🎻 Janis: Using you as a ploy to get him hot under that starched collar all along Janis: soz babes 😘 Jimmy: I should've known your real goal was to get under that lumpy jumper Janis: 😂 Janis: know he's got the goods under it Jimmy: Can't fight the feeling Janis: s'a real shame the hottest female teacher we've got is that TA with the wonky fringe and clompy shoes Janis: who you got your sights set on next? Jimmy: always been about a wonky fringe meself Jimmy: Clompy shoes are a massive bonus when Twix is being a mad bitch underfoot too like Janis: draw the line there pal Janis: gotta get the dog in the divorce like Janis: not letting that hipster bitch anywhere near Jimmy: 🥊 Jimmy: going down swinging Janis: if she doesn't scream cat lady as is, she's defs into weird pets like fucking Janis: stick insects Janis: hope you're soooo happy together like 🖕 not even mad Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: nice to have your blessing, mate Jimmy: be my best man on the day Janis: literally fuck off Janis: only just got rid of the lesbian rumours and you wanna put me in a suit WHILST friendzoning me Janis: nah 😤 Jimmy: spoilsport Jimmy: found a challenge she won't accept Janis: only way i'm showing up is if you invite all your exes and put us on a table so we can chat mad shit on you Janis: be a man about it, boy Jimmy: card table at the back, couple of chairs so you can place your bets 👍 Janis: more like it Janis: hook up with your actual best man Janis: pure spite and alcohol fuelling me Jimmy: It'd probs be Cass so best not Jimmy: no good for the rep Janis: 😡 Janis: same tho, if i ever got hitched (ignoring the unlikeliness of that) i'd have to hit up the sibs for those bridesmaids and ting Janis: least my fam is good for numbers if not company like Jimmy: Grace has used her twin senses and is moodboarding somewhere rn Jimmy: Unlucky Janis: 🤢 don't Janis: vietnam flashbacks rn Janis: you know how many fake weddings of hers i've attended Jimmy: I can imagine Jimmy: And am Jimmy: Cute 😂 Janis: Fuck off Janis: shame your dad don't wanna be bffs Janis: can't hit him up for embarrassing pics and stories to use against you Jimmy: Another win to my name Janis: 🖕 Janis: sincerely hope you get a beverage thrown in ur face Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Wish you'da got me some earplugs Jimmy: Come on over mate, I've got loads Jimmy: #whenyourdadisdating Janis: literally Janis: at least you know its the same woman to avoid when she runs to the bog to clean herself up Janis: Pablo already on 2nd of the day Janis: Need a way to let 'em know Jimmy: Gotta have a sleepover with your real bae Jimmy: Twix'll sort 'em Jimmy: Sticking her nose in, literally like Janis: Oh that sweet curious girl Janis: some things she never need see 🙈 Jimmy: #nosybitchproblems Janis: getting dirt on enemy #1 anyway she can Janis: those bribe bones coming her way Jimmy: Happy v-day to her Janis: Maybe you and wonky fringe can have a fuck-off Janis: bet she's a right goer when you get the hair down and glasses off like Jimmy: Invite you and Mr Lucas for the post shag debrief Jimmy: Give you a /10 Janis: Naturally Janis: so curious to know how I rank 😒 Jimmy: Always a 10 with Twix Janis: 🙌 Janis: that'll help with the rep Jimmy: Me and Killer'll take the heat off with our new relationship shine Janis: yeah it loves you Janis: daft fucking dog Jimmy: Pity I can't turn the 💕 into 💰 Jimmy: Loads of lattes no will to keep slinging 'em Janis: Looking for a career change? Janis: fame getting too real? Jimmy: Got me looking like a deer in the headlights Jimmy: Tammy's livid Jimmy: There can only be one Janis: 'bout to be a bloodbath in CG Jimmy: Place your bets, mate Janis: hmm Janis: Tams got the reach like but reckon she's mostly talk n neck Janis: nan's not been in has she? 😉 Jimmy: She's serving me that 💔 while I crane my own neck looking out for her all day long Jimmy: no sign yet Janis: Gutted Janis: even she's feeling the lurve today Janis: literally no place to go Janis: so tragic Jimmy: About to eat my feelings like a proper flat white squad member Jimmy: Speaking of feeling that l.u.r.v.e did you hear how many cards Cass got sent? Jimmy: 7 Janis: WHAT Janis: get it gurl but also fuck off lads she's too lil Jimmy: walking about like its nowt Jimmy: 😎 Janis: thank god Janis: no one needs that ego boost Janis: fuming tbh Jimmy: Bobs made one at school Jimmy: guess who for Janis: Aww, bless him Janis: she does need that boost Janis: he gonna hand-deliver? Jimmy: He's insisting Jimmy: So be about Jimmy: You got one too Jimmy: moving in on my lass Janis: we in, have to kick the empty ice cream cartons out the way like but find us in front of bridget jones or similar Janis: i'm honoured like 😊 Jimmy: Yours is bigger but hers has more glitter Jimmy: Can't call a winner Janis: size matters Janis: #facts Janis: soz Gracie, gotta fight you or you'll get too comfy Jimmy: Just don't let her vlog it Jimmy: Don't need porno style #s going viral Janis: MY TWIN ATTACKED ME!?!?!?! (NOT CLICKBAIT) Jimmy: Haters, on this sacred day Jimmy: #savage Janis: Glad to keep her in #content Janis: who's the real ⭐ baby Jimmy: 🤩 Jimmy: Better than 💝 chocs Janis: the calories! 😱 Jimmy: who needs food when you can exist on ☕ and even hotter goss 💋 Janis: diet of champions that 🙄 Janis: mia be bullshitting them that she doesn't run on sheer cuntiness Jimmy: Mia? A bullshitter? 😲 Jimmy: Nope Janis: awks 😕 Janis: did you think you was forever? Jimmy: she was my fucking cinnamon apple Janis: 😂 Janis: at least i've got an excuse to fight her again Janis: try not to get in the way this time Jimmy: Will do Jimmy: 2nd rule of fight club, get out the way dickhead Janis: brad pitt in that film Janis: mwah 💋👌 Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: I got no retort because Helena, not the one like Janis: crazy bitch not your type, eh? Janis: think the masses would have to disagree 😏 Jimmy: Start a # or I'm not listening, sorry everyone Janis: he's a modern man Jimmy: 💪😎 Janis: wonder if anyone will get pregnant tonight Janis: wanna make a bet? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I'll put today's wage on it Jimmy: No tips Jimmy: Need them for our big 💕 plans Janis: alright, you're on Janis: here's hoping its only the tip for all the other lads like Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Walked into that one Janis: 💁 Janis: shame we're not a hardcore catholic school #upthebuttforjesus Jimmy: I'd have to pray meself if I'd made a bet under them conditions Janis: what can i say? just like me, showing faith in our peers Janis: ur so negative, babe Janis: like dem tests 🤞 Jimmy: don't need to be an optimist to wait for those positives Janis: we'll see Jimmy: what to I get when I win this one Jimmy: quite a streak now babe 😏 Janis: 😣 Janis: on the off chance you manage to scrape a win Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: 🤔 Jimmy: Escape route for longer than a night for starters Jimmy: Lovebirds doing my head in Jimmy: I'm thinking a weekend break that isn't #cursed like Janis: Always down for running Janis: up for it not being away from you this time 😉 Janis: bringing the kiddos or? Jimmy: Depends if they kick off Jimmy: Got time to work on bribes Jimmy: Dad's Valerie might wanna play happy families 😒 Janis: 😬 Janis: that'll be fun Janis: can't have you dealing with that Janis: at least their tales of woe whilst you were gone will be packed with that #scandal and #drama Jimmy: might be easier to take 'em amount of SOS's we'd get Jimmy: Cass blowing up both our phones before we're out the door Jimmy: fuck knows Janis: Eithers cool Janis: just leave the hardcore whips n chains at home like Jimmy: Damn Jimmy: Alright done Jimmy: If we stick 'em on their own does that make us the mccanns Janis: not if we don't drug 'em Janis: stick to sweets and other such bribes and we'll be alright Jimmy: Gonna be enough of a plan getting there without adding a murder cover up Janis: honestly Janis: not on the agenda Janis: not a nice pretty white doctor like, never getting away with it Jimmy: not the 💕 american films'd have you believe either I reckon Jimmy: Surrounded by a cloud of smoke already cheers don't need a hail of bullets Janis: yeah if #blacklivesmatter taught us anything Janis: not the ideal way to spend a weekend Janis: also, still creasing at her name Janis: such middle aged hot piece of ass vibes Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: definitely can't promise you any of that Jimmy: but if you win, I'll 🚭 and hopefully run like less of a middle aged dickhead with a dad bod Jimmy: less of an evidence trail an' all Jimmy: win win Janis: whoa, that's awful big talk from the resident chimney Janis: you are sure you're gonna win 😉 Janis: but i accept the full Ts and Cs Janis: you should train with me Janis: not just an excuse to 👀 the dad bod Jimmy: Deal done then Jimmy: Trying to see me in my short shorts Jimmy: You'll have to catch me first like Janis: wouldn't even be fair to make it a competition like Jimmy: If you're too shit scared, mate Janis: just curious why you wanna lose so bad Janis: thinking you might love what punishment i have in mind? Jimmy: Wondering what it feels like 'cause it never happens Jimmy: You seem to be about it with all your repeats Janis: I'm going to enjoy making you suffer Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: Gonna start a club with Mr Lucas? Janis: any time i get to spend with him like Janis: not like I wanna think up new cruel and unusual ways to get you but Janis: needs must Jimmy: 💕 cute Jimmy: I'd tell him to get his 🎻 out but we know what those hands are busy doing Janis: eurgh 😂 too far Janis: my 'rents reckon he's an actual predator, like, there are stories Janis: do not wanna commit so hard to this bit that I become his next victim forreal Jimmy: Not gonna happen babe 💪😎🐶 Jimmy: Squad got you covered Janis: My heroes 😍 Jimmy: If Twix isn't up to it my bae'll come through Jimmy: Named for it literally Janis: Reckon that was the idea Janis: or they were being ironic with it Janis: #sojokes Jimmy: either way I'll knock him out before its a drama Jimmy: as long as you don't get in my way naturally Janis: don't worry, got the sense I was born with 😜 Janis: dickhead Jimmy: Lucky you were born with it Jimmy: Some of us have neither Janis: 🎻 Janis: so what part of pretty woman you looking to recreate this time Janis: what's your artistic vision? 😏 Jimmy: I haven't seen it Jimmy: Bound to be an aesthetic montage though, isn't there? Janis: don't let my sister hear you Janis: roped into GIRLS NIGHT! before you know it Jimmy: Get the popcorn in Gracie, mine's salted Jimmy: Shout you a diet something if you keep the noise down, hun Janis: #romanticvdaynightplans Janis: i get why she got confused, you have #boundaryissues mate 😂 Jimmy: Living up to that dating a twin stereotype Jimmy: The people in my comment section DEMAND it, alright? Jimmy: #gottagiveemwhattheywant Janis: Nah, bitch, you can only play that if we're identical Janis: its not like whoops thought it was u Janis: on ANY level 😤 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Oh shit the boss is the embodiment of that emoji Jimmy: Yours not mine Jimmy: Gonna have to get a room Jimmy: Ban him, that's not how I'm earning employee of the month perks, sorry lad Janis: Convenient 😒 Janis: lemme catch u in her inbox boi 🥊 Janis: jk, get to work slacker, catch you in a mo Jimmy: 🐊 Jimmy: In a bit 💕 Janis: 🖤