#I miss you mom

[ricorditempestosi]

non sarai presente qui, ma nel mio cuore lo sarai sempre

[that-scorpio]

My Mom…. My Mom 🤎

Although you weren’t physically here to help me celebrate my 30th, you were here in spirit. While I was making this picture, I cried because you should’ve been here 🥺 I love you & miss you soooo much mom! Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you and how life would’ve been with you still around. Birthdays &. holidays are always the hardest, but I know you’re still covering me every step of the way! 🤎

[bloomingsheep]

How are you no longer in this world when I still see you in everything I do?

[beholdthemem]

I guess March 13th is just destined to be a difficult day for our family.

[triski73]

Random Camera Roll Photo of the Day

Day 2

June 2021 Family Trip

My brother, mom and I had just spent several days in the Black Hills of South Dakota with family before heading off ona our first trip together in over a decade.

Lil bro and I had never been to Yellowstone and Mom and had been as a child. So we planned it on a 30 min video call several months before.

Little did we know that it would be our last family trip, and thst less than 2 years later Mom would be gone, a cancer statistic. A non-smoker diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and gone within 2 weeks.

This photo is bittersweet. A great memory so close to such an unexpected and painful loss. I look at the three of us and how alike we all are - our similar features and even the traits that aren't visible.

As we age we inevitably become like.our parents whether we want to or not. I can truthfully say now that it makes me happy when I notice myself doing things my mom did. I love that my crazy cackling laugh is so similar to hers, that when I sneeze hard it sounds just like her, and I'm even growing to appreciate my tiny nose because I got it from her.

[ranwing]

Some thoughts on Mother's Day

For many people in the United States (and other countries) today is Mother's Day. A lot of families will be gathering to celebrate but while doing so, please keep in mind that for many people, Mother's Day is not a day of celebration. There are those (myself included) who lost their mothers and today is a reminder of what we don't have in our lives anymore. There are those who have complicated or toxic relationships with their mothers and today is a reminder of the idealized relationship they never had. And there are those who never had a mother and get reminded of that missing part of their lives.

So if today is not a good day for you, please know that you're not alone. Treat yourself kindly and surround yourselves with friends and family that can make the day a little better for you. Have a good day for yourself.

[lazyscience]

so in ways this is definitely a time capsule of things we don’t miss about traveling (I mean, in the era of Apple Pay, e-ticketing and Uber a lot of the jokes are going to have to be updated for Kevin Hart’s alleged remake, on the books since 2021) but in other ways timeless - the weird, sometimes uncomfortable and sometimes unexpectedly delightful interactions we have when crammed into a confined space with strangers where the only thing we have in common is that we’re headed to the same destination, the eternal plight of the customer service worker, how artificial the distinctions are between rich and poor, white-collar and blue-collar, and how all most of us are trying to do any given day is get home to where people love us, and how it’s a lot easier for everyone if we see each other as people, not obstacles, while we do it.

and man, I miss John Candy. He was amazing at managing to be funny without being cruel. for the younger Tumblr folks out there who probably have not seen a lot of his stuff, John’s characters always felt like they were inviting you to laugh with them, not at someone else, and the real man was like that too. There’s some stories about that in the article. Gone too soon.

[camrtnz1211]

♪ En esta casa no existen fantasmas, son puros recuerdos

Son mil sentimientos

De lo que vivimos cuando tú estabas aquí ♪

[trustonlystars]

“The war was over long ago, and I still can't find my way back home. I look for fresh flowers with no blood stains, I never found any. I have walked more than a mile on crumbled thorns. It's a painting called Red.”

-trustonlystars | Jannie f.

[ezekieltobiasfletcher]

Keep It Simple

The worst of my bout with COVID is over. Tomorrow will be two weeks since I noticed the uncomfortable tingle in my throat. Yesterday marks one week since I suffered the worst of it. I am on the mend, but some symptoms still linger. As much as I want them to go away, I need these remaining mild symptoms to linger a little while longer as a reminder. I need to be reminded of the promises I made to my higher power that I would take better care of myself. To sleep when I am tired, and not to use substinances, screens, and people to distract myself from the work and pains of living my life on life's terms. I need to be reminded of how honest I was with myself as I pleaded through prayer to survive this virus. I need to be reminded that I will not find my salvation in thinking about what I need to do. I will only save myself by focusing on my higher power and walking my talk. If I want things to be different, then I need to continue breaking from my old habits and coping mechanisms and act as-if, being different, everyday, one day at a time.

I had very little appetite while I was in the depths of COVID. For a few days, all I could tolerate was Lipton Noodles packets with some added rice. The first day I felt a little better, I knew I needed to consume calories, protein, and fiber to help my decimated digestion system. I decided to keep it simple, and made myself two eggs, scrambled in the pan, and two slices of wheat toast with butter. I also decided to nourish my soul by playing one of my favorite games with my mind. I call it, "look how lucky I am..."

I was raised by an early Boomer mother, born in the latter half of the 1940's. She was raised by parents who grew up during the depression, and she also spent a great deal of time with her maternal grandparents, who together with my maternal grandparents, all survived The Great Depression. The love and hardships that my mom was raised with gave her the ability to always find silver linings and to make do with what she had. I will write more about her someday, but for today, I just want you to know that I am very grateful for her and her simple, everyday values that bring me comfort when I need it most. My mother's spirit is part of the great amalgamation that is my "higher power".

As I was making my breakfast, I put on a YouTube Music playlist called: Depression Era, Golden Age of Radio. I remembered stories I was told about what it was like living through world wars, the 1918 flu, and the Great Depression. While preparing my meal, these memories of stories from my family made me thankful to have a stove, cookware, a toaster, sliced bread, butter, eggs, salt and pepper, and a warm home with indoor hot water plumbing to live in. By my grandparents and great grandparent's standards, I have everything I need to live a good and simple life. By simply having a job and a home in the United States, I am in the top 5% of the world. Look how lucky I am.

As horrible as COVID has been for me, it helped me get to bed earlier, I haven't had any marijuana in two weeks, I've limited my screen time, I removed all the social media apps from the home screen of my phone, I've logged off from work by 5:30pm each day, I'm being more intentional about my meals, and with not getting the munchies from the pot, I'm not snacking all the time like Scooby and Shaggy. And as shitty as being sick was, literal pun intended, I am back to my pre-COVID lockdown weight. So yeah... I'm letting this recent mental bottoming out affect me, and I'm getting out of my own way and drawing even closer to my higher power. Look how lucky I am to be alive and be able to change for the better.

For what it's worth, that meal of eggs, toast, and a small glass of orange juice, it was the most delicious fucking meal I have had in a long time. I never want to forget the depth of gratitude I felt on that morning; ever.

[that-scorpio]

I miss you 💕

[thornrichards-101]

It's been nearly 286 days since my mom died and I'm not doing very well

[awordbyrmlloyd]

Two flowers fell on me as i prayed over your grave.

Two flowers fell because it was time for them to fall.

[thosewordsthoseframes]

Mom, you live on through me.

Mom, I remember the kind quotes you told me.

Now I will show your generativity and share them, since you cannot anymore.

My heart is forever broken, but from it’s cracks I will spread the love you gave me out to rest of the world.

I will use this depth of agony from losing you to create a better world, in your essence.

You didn’t die in vein, you live on through me.

[starlessnova]

It isn't that someone very close to me died, it's that the part of me that only they could bring out would never be brought out again 💔

[artemiscalled]

It’s been four years Mom.

Four years since I blew off dinner with you to hang out with my friends.

Four years since I went to sleep, expecting to see you the next day.

Four years since I got the call at 4am. That you were found unconscious.

Four years since I rushed to the hospital in the middle of the night, praying for a miracle.

Four years since I cried next to your bed, holding your hand.

Four years since I cried and sang lullabies and prayed and told you everything I should have so much sooner.

Four years since I hugged you and rested my head on your shoulder.

Four years since I saw you behind your eyes.

Four years since I said goodbye.

I thought it wouldn’t hurt anymore, but my god, it does. I love you Mom. I still miss you.

I just wish this was a journey you could return from.

-Em 💜