#I need a third place maybe I need to join a gym. we’ve got stuff in the basement and that’s been fantastic but I am home or working | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shandycandy278 · 4 years

Text

To Fall In Love With a Chaotic Idiot

@soldatino @faemytho @ashfilledhart

I have done it.

This is also officially my New Years celebration post.

This whole thing is based off of this ask.

I hope you enjoy!

———

If you were to ask the majority of the skeletons of the Multiverse who they liked the most out of the most well-known outcodes, you’d probably get a whole lot of ‘Ink’ and ‘Dream’, with ‘Blue’ in third and ‘Error’ in last.

Of course, Nightmare wasn’t tied for last because he had his gang, but he personally didn't care about that.

What he did care about, was why in the WHOLE WIDE MULTIVERSE would ANYONE actually LIKE the STUPID, CHAOTIC SQUIDBALL!

Nightmare had had it up to Ink’s own ego with him!

Why, you might ask?

Because Ink, without fail, had snuck into his castle without rhyme or reason for the last several months.

Nightmare could forgive a break-in or two, but 73?!

Clearly, Ink was finding a way past every single defense Nightmare could conjure up no matter how hard Nightmare tried, and one day Nightmare would figure out how.

But until then, Ink would continue to break in, and he’d rub it in Nightmare’s face like the smug little radhole he was!

And things had gotten worse.

How?

Because Killer, Dust, Horror, and Cross had decided that they were all buddy-buddy with Ink now, and after the discovery of Ink’s love for pranks, they had all been in the midst of a pranking war with each other for the past two months.

Nightmare ducked down just as a pie was catapulted from across the room at him, Nightmare having purposefully triggered the prank so that he could get rid of it. He then used his tentacle to grab onto Dust’s leg just before he could run away from where he was hiding, hanging him upside down as he drew him in closer.

“What have I said about the Pie Pranks?” He snarled, displeased as Dust squirmed in his hold. His castle was already a mess, he didn't need to have food stuck in the carpet.

“...” Dust hung defeatedly in shame as he stopped moving. “Not to use them anymore.”

“And why is that?”

“Because it’s really hard to clean up, and because it offends Horror.”

“Good.” He was tempted to drop Dust, but considering that the other was still recovering from a concussion, it would be counterproductive. He tossed the skeleton onto the couch instead. “Where are the others?”

“Last I heard, Horror’s started to make dinner and Ink, Killer, and Cross have the main war in the Gym.” Dust stretched. “I was supposed to catch Ink and Cross by surprise when Killer chased them out, but he hasn’t done that yet.”

Nightmare hummed, glancing towards where the kitchen was and then where the gym was before looking at the wall the pie had landed on. Then he looked back to Dust, unimpressed.

“Your punishment now is to clean up after yourself, help Horror, and do whatever punishment he deems fit for your wasting of his food.”

“Wha- but Nightmare!”

“No buts.” Nightmare briskly turned around, grumbling as he stalked towards the Gym. “Go.”

Grumbling, Dust did as he was told.

Nightmare could feel a headache coming on as he slowly approached the Gym, but he doubted that today could get any wo-

CRASH!

Nightmare’s eye twitched.

“I should not have thought that.” He growled to himself, picking up his speed as he rushed towards where the crash was. “I should not have thought that, I should not have thought that-“ He barely dodged an array of bones and knives that were thrown down the hall as both Killer and Cross ran out of the gym with arrows of light at their backs. “I should not have thought that!”

Both Killer and Cross grunted when they ran into him, and when they saw who they ran into they paled.

“Uhh, Hi boss.” Killer said when all Nightmare did was glare at them. “We were just, Uh-“

“Making a tactical retreat!”

“Yes.” Killer nodded. “Tactical retreat.”

“That didn’t look like a tactical retreat.” Nightmare’s glare grew further. “And that doesn’t explain how my brother got here.”

“And Blue.” Cross piped up as the fighting continued in the Gym. Nightmare pushed them all into the wall when a Gaster Blaster was fired, and he did a mental count off in his head.

Killer and Cross were the only ones in his gang who had been in the Gym- Dust had said so himself, so the only person who could have fought Dream and Blue was…

Nightmare almost didn’t believe it when black paint was tossed out the door too.

“Oh no you don’t.” He said, reaching his tentacles out and grabbing Killer and Cross before they could sneak off. “Dream somehow broke in, and I’m not letting you two abandon a battle.”

“Ink looked pissed though.” Killer grumbled. Nightmare’s eye flared.

“Are you saying that you’re running away because you’re scared of Ink being mad?”

“No, boss-!”

“We were running so that we could come up with a plan!” Cross hastily explained. “And so that we could get back up and tell you! The second Dream and Blue burst in and attacked, Ink started fighting them!”

“...” Nightmare slowly looked between the open doors of the Gym and the two currently in his hold, contemplating his choices. Then he placed them on the ground and pushed them towards the battle. “Come on. Let’s see what’s going on here.”

Eager to stay on his good side for the time being, Kilker and Cross were more than happy to lead the way through the chaos and into the Gym.

Nightmare almost couldn’t believe his eye.

Ink was, indeed, fighting off both Dream and Blue. He also looked really, really mad.

“Well then.” He looked to the two in front of him, who were just… standing there. Watching.

He couldn’t exactly blame them, it was a mesmerizing sight, but at the same time…

He pushed Killer and Cross forward.

“What are you waiting for?” He asked, making both of them flinch. “Go. Fight.”

Without complaint, both of them rushed into battle. Nightmare himself took in the sight for just a little longer before joining in, and he reluctantly admitted something to himself.

Maybe, just maybe, Ink wasn’t all that bad.

———

The battle didn’t last all that long, but in all honesty Ink didn’t care about that.

With a forceful shove to the ink holding his friends captive, he pushed them through a portal and followed them into the Doodle Sphere.

“Ink, what the heck?!” Dream exclaimed the moment they were released, wobbling a little as he stood up. Apparently being carried by ink did that to people, Ink couldn’t see why, but oh well.

“What?”

“You fought with them!” Dream threw his arms into the air. “I thought you were on our side!”

“I am.” A beat. “But I’m also on theirs.”

“Ink-“

“Look, Dream-“ Ink took a step forward. “I still care about the Multiverse and stuff, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t make friends! And I made friends! With the gang!” He laughed at Dream’s stunned silence. “We’ve been having a prank war for the last two months, and I think I’m finally getting through to Nightmare!” He leaned forward a little, a wide and smug grin on his face. “Don’t you think it would be cool if someone you were friends with also was friends with Nightmare?”

“...” Dream slowly took a deep breath as Blue finally decided that it was safe to stand.

“When did this start?” He asked.

“Oh! About a year ago!” Ink’s smile grew wider. “I think Cross unintentionally dared me to break into Nightmare’s hideout or something, so I did! And I kinda just kept on doing it, and I learned a lot of stuff about them. Then I got bored so I started pranking them and it turned into a war! Cross and I only recently partnered up because I promised him chocolate if he helped me unleash The Ultimate Prank, but then Killer and Dust caught onto our plan and teamed up to try and stop us!”

“And how does Nightmare feel about this?” Dream asked, and Ink found it amusing that he looked like he was done with everything.

“Well, he doesn’t like it.” Ink shrugged. “But I’m sure I’ll get to him eventually!”

“Well, since this is a thing now, and since Nightmare could use some friends,” Dream waved his hand in an ‘I’m helpless to do anything about this’ gesture, which made Ink’s smile grow wider. “Go ahead. Just make sure that Nightmare knows that you’re gonna be fighting for whatever side you feel like, okay?”

“Okay!”

So the first thing he did was teleport back to the castle and chase down Nightmare.

And for once, he wasn’t greeted with a glare, hiss, screech, yell- or anything, really, except for a suspicious narrowed cyan eyelight that was watching him cautiously.

“You fought your friends.”

“Well, I fight you guys on a semi-daily basis, so I don’t see what the big deal is.”

“... You see us as friends?”

“Well duh,” Ink rolled his eye lights. “Why else would I keep on coming over to hang out?” Nightmare just stared incredulously at him in response, so Ink continued. “Basically, I’ll fight with whoever it is I’m hanging out with that day, so I’m not going to keep on taking sides or anything. If I’m hanging out with you when it happens, I'll fight with you. If I’m hanging out with them, I’ll fight with them.”

“... Alright.” Then he turned around, prepared to walk back to his office. He paused, just for a moment. “Next time, just walk through the door. It’ll open now for you.” And then, he disappeared into the shadows and zoomed away.

“Sweet! I should write all of this down…”

———

It had been several months since Ink talked to Nightmare about the whole deal, and Nightmare still didn’t know how he felt about Ink. Ink was a Chaotic Good at best and a Chaotic Evil at worst, which really did make him a Chaotic Neutral the rest of the time.

His gang absolutely loved it, though.

They especially liked it when Ink would go with them every once in a while for a Supply Raid, and the inhabitants of the AU would be utterly confused about why Ink was apart of it of all people, when literally just a week or two ago they had visited the same AU fighting against each other.

Nightmare was pretty sure Ink’s popularity votes were starting to put him in second place behind Dream.

Regardless, that didn’t mean that he could just ignore the weird feeling that he’d get when Ink was around.

He actually knew what exactly these weird feelings, but he refused to actually think or say them out loud. It would pass eventually, he just had to wait for it to disappear.

It didn’t help that Dream was onto him. Almost every single time Ink came over, he’d ask about why Dream felt weird and strange emotions coming from Nightmare, as well as how worried Dream was about him. Nightmare always just brushed the questions off, because he himself knew that he was in denial of such things existing, and then distracted Ink with something that was more entertaining than trying to question Nightmare.

It worked every single time, and he could feel Dream’s frustration start to grow because of it.

That was the only amusing thing about this.

Sighing, Nightmare slumped into the couch in the ‘living room’ of the castle and turned on the TV, switching it to a random channel in an attempt to distract himself from his thoughts.

Spoiler Alert- it didn’t work.

Instead, his thoughts decided to circle back to Ink. As they had been ever since Ink had decided that he had wanted to get closer to Nightmare after the decision that Ink was on both sides.

He hadn’t known that Ink’s sense of humor could get dark, after all. Especially the dark that had him genuinely laughing, which not many people could actually accomplish.

Regardless, he was ready to continue to deny himself the truth while watching a silly Mettaton Show. Because that’s what he was going to do. That’s what he was doing. He most certainly wasn’t thinking about Ink. Nope! Not at all!

He was so lost in thought that he didn’t notice the said smug squidball until he had plopped himself in Nightmare’s lap.

“What are we watching?” He asked casually, ignoring how he was suddenly jostled when Nightmare startled. Nightmare gave the Guardian a dirty glare that even his boys would cower under.

“A Stupid MTT Show.” He answered, his glare increasing when Ink proceeded to make himself comfortable against the goopy skeleton. Was he trying to make Nightmare’s denial harder?! “Why are you here?”

“I wanted to come.” He shrugged, glancing behind them. Nightmare’s suspicions soared through the roof at that, Ink was terrible at being subtle after all, and was more than ready to turn around and see what was going on when a new, familiar voice popped up from behind the couch.

“Yup! It’s definitely because of you, Ink!”

The sound that indignantly left Nightmare’s mouth most certainly did not sound like a pathetic child screaming bloody murder.

He leapt off of the couch, throwing Ink off of him as one of his tentacles caught Dream’s arm before he could run away, holding him up high in the air.

“What the funk, Dream?!” He exclaimed. “Why are you here?!”

“Ink invited me.” His brother shrugged, but there was a knowing glint in his eyes that made Nightmare want to throw him into the wall across the room. “We both grew tired of you denying these feelings of yours, Night- although, it’s interesting to feel them when we’re not fighting and up close.”

“What are they, anyway?” Ink asked, getting off of the couch to walk over to Nightmare. He had a stupid grin on his face all the while, and while Nightmare wanted to strangle him for it, he also wanted to do… other things.

He was only faintly aware of the heat on his cheeks when Ink leaned into his personal space, his smirk growing wider.

“Awww, don’t tell me that they’re those kinds of feelings!” He cooed. “You know, the feelings of-“

“Don’t say it out loud!” He hissed, curling in on himself a little. Ink considered him for a moment, Creator-knew what going through his mind, before the grin grew the widest he had ever seen it just before Ink threw himself onto Nightmare.

“Aww, don’t worry!” He exclaimed, smiling bright. “You’re still one of my best friends anyway!”

“I…” Nightmare floundered for a moment, for once lost for words as his cheeks grew hotter. Eventually he growled, shoving Ink off and into Dream, making them both fall on top of each other and onto the floor. “Just get him out of here!”

He then turned around and stomped off without a word, internally screaming at himself.

He should have known that that wouldn’t have been the end of it.

———

Ink stared after Nightmare as he got up, Dream wheezing behind him while trying (and failing) to stifle his laughter.

… huh.

That was interesting- he had never seen Nightmare react in such a way. To anyone.

Yet Ink could pull that kind of a reaction out.

Slowly, as he continued to stare after Nightmare, Dream’s laughter slowed.

“Ink?” He asked.

“Yeah?”

“Why is The Look on your face?”

“What look?”

“You know, The Look.”

“Oh. That.” He smiled. “I wonder how far I can push this.”

“Ink.” Ink’s smile grew wider. “Ink, no.”

“Ink yes.”

———

Apparently I have hit the text limit so this is a two shot.

I will repost this with the next part shortly.

#vantablack #nightink #inkmare #Ink Sans #Nightmare Sans #Ink is the Chaotic Idiot #just #needed to clarify that #Nightmare is defo the king of denial #happy new years #writing #story #fanfiction #two shot #chapter

245 notes · View notes

apex-academy · 3 years

Text

Chapter 5: Caring Is a Hazard to Your Health (#30)

The small amount of takedown in the gym gives us a little time to cool off next door. I’m nursing a glass of apple juice at an empty table when Kanagi hops on top of it without warning.

“Why.”

She twists to offer me a hand.

“Yo, come up here, too.”

“No.”

“C’mon, it’s just for a second.”

“I wasn’t particularly worried I’d be stranded up there for ages.”

“C’monnnnn... You, like, really oughta...”

“...”

On the plus side, Kanagi jumping on tables isn’t abnormal enough for her to have gotten everyone’s attention for long. So if I do do this... for some freaking reason...

“........”

I’m trying to be a team player today, I guess. I push my glass well out of the way and step on up. Weird how different the cafeteria feels just looking at it from a few feet higher.

“YO, DUDES!!”

That’s enough to easily cut through the fledgling conversations around the room. All eyes turn to us, and I get the distinct urge to sit back down. I’m guessing that’s not what Kanagi had in mind. If she had anything in mind besides very vaguely embarrassing me. Though, all things considered, I’ve suffered enough secondhand embarrassment in this place to have a decent tolerance built up.

“We ready to get hyped for the next event?”

“Absolutely!”

“I’m sure it will be of at least a little amusement.”

“Oh boy oh yeah, I’m super hyped!!”

“So what are we doing?”

“Tell ‘em, Kakumi!”

I drop my voice. “How am I supposed to know??”

“Like, take a wild flippin’ guess, dude. I didn’t just grab you ‘cuz we’re friends.”

“Uh.”

“...Oh.”

I forgot I’d even suggested it.

“I’m going to assume pool of some sort.”

“Heck yeah!”

“And, like, not the swimming kind.”

That is not something I needed clarification on.

“So! I totally have no idea how that’s supposed to work for, like, a buncha people, so that’ll be up to Kakumi!”

“Thanks.”

There are certainly a few ways I could frame it. Not to mention there are several tables in my study hall, anyway. Hmm...

“We can announce, like, the specific stuff when we get there.”

“Just wanted to let everybody know first!”

“Including me...”

The rest of our little water break is sufficient time to get things planned out.

“Arright! Everything good to go, dude? Got your key and junk?”

“Yeah. Upstairs we go, then?”

“Figuratively speaking, I hope.”

“Yeah. Up-elevators we go?”

The group moves out. It may be for our safety, and there’s plenty of room, but... it’s uncomfortable, loading everyone into the elevator at once. Every other time that happens, it’s because someone else is dead.

“...”

At least Monochap didn’t hop in. We must be a lot easier to keep an eye on this way, huh? For friend and foe alike. Speaking of which, I still wonder...

As the elevator dings to let us out on the third floor, I slink back to where Aidan sits. I seize the wheelchair handles, mostly to have a good excuse to be there. I still drop my voice once the others hang back to let us go out first.

“By the way... What ‘measures’ exactly did you take to keep track of people trying to leave the dorms?”

“I believe I stated I was not going to tell anyone the details.”

“Well, yeah, but... You trust me, right? I know how to keep my mouth shut, too.”

“Unfortunately, that isn’t the issue.”

“Even if I...”

“...”

“Er, even if I trust you not to try anything nefarious or enable someone else to do so, it wouldn’t be safe to share. After all, if someone wants to kill without getting caught, overcoming my mysterious ‘measures’ should be a top priority. Hopefully it’s nothing anyone’s been able to figure out yet, nor will they be able to.”

“In which case the would-be killer’s safest option would be to target anyone who might know the trick to it. Whether it’s only trying to find it out, or specifically targeting the source so he or she doesn’t have to worry about cracking it at all.”

“So if I give anyone reason to believe I’ve told you, or Mister Attenborough, or anyone else, that would only be worsening matters.”

His voice rises a bit, though still not quite back to normal volume.

“So no, Miss Kogamino, I won’t even be telling you.”

“That makes enough sense, but...”

“By that logic, doesn’t that make it extremely dangerous for you specifically? If there are no other sources for that information, you’re the only one left to target.”

“Well, yes, of course.”

“But frankly, in my condition I’m an easy target to start with, and at some point stacking the deck against me gives diminishing enough returns it doesn’t make much difference anymore.”

Well. Can’t argue with that, seeing as I already almost...

Anyway.

“Hey guyyyys!”

I look up to see Ichiriki, near the west wing door, waving aggressively.

“You’re coming, right?”

“Of course we’re coming!! Sports Day would be cancelled otherwise!”

He attempts to crane his neck towards me but eventually gives up.

“Since you’re apparently escorting me at the moment, do you mind?”

“Right. Sorry.”

We catch up with the others, head into the wing, and I get my study hall door open. Strictly speaking, there’s enough room for everyone in here, but it’ll start feeling crowded pretty fast if we’re all circling tables at the same time.

“All right, dude! How’re we doin’ this?”

“Let’s see...”

Eventually I set up more of a trick shot contest than a proper game, but at least it lets everyone take turns. We can transition to something more reminiscent of a real match once we’ve whittled down the competition.

Maybe it’s just because I’m in my wheelhouse, but this is much more entertaining to watch than the gym contests. Kaichi’s not a bad shot, though you can tell his leg injury’s jacked up his balance. Kanagi manages to not actually put a hole through the wall when a jumpshot goes horribly wrong. Mahavir has a special talent for lining up shots beautifully and then spinning them out of line at the last possible second. Aidan... tries. That’s about all I can say for that. Setting up a bridge just doesn’t make up for having one arm in a sling. But I get the feeling he wasn’t great at this to start with, anyway. No big loss.

Tsunyasha can’t seem to get a grip on how we’re playing this game, and even I can’t gauge her skill level that well when she’d rather wield the cue like a weapon than an implement. Yuki is still as bad as the last time she tried, but she seems like she’s having fun. I think. Ichiriki, meanwhile, is surprisingly decent, but at the cost of smacking someone with his backstroke every single time despite our best efforts to avoid it.

All of two people actually pass my little “qualifier,” but in the interest of hosting more than one game, I give Mahavir and Yuki the go-ahead, anyway. They’re at least not threats to public safety.

“Huh, but then wait!”

“Aren’t you gonna try it, Kakumi?”

“I don’t really need to take this shot to know I’d make it, so.”

“Oho. But if that doesn’t sound like an excuse.”

“Are you serious.” I realize too late I’m asking this of Tsunyasha. Never mind, then.

“Hey, spectators are totes important to sports, too!”

“So you should, like, let us spectate, right?”

Is that how that works? “I guess? It just seemed like a waste of time.”

“Isn’t the point of all this to waste time?”

“Touché.”

I rifle through the ball return and set up a few stripes in the same places I did for the others.

Looking at this setup when I’m going to do it makes it feel like way too small a challenge now. Yet it still took out most of the others. Well, whatever. If they want me to show off, I can show off.

This was supposed to take two or three hits to sink everything, but I could do it in one. It’ll take some serious spin, though...

I pick out a cue stick and circle the table before setting up my shot. Pok-pok-pok-pok, a brief clatter as each ball sinks, and then the low rumble as they make their way back to the ball return.

Ichiriki applauds, quickly joined by Yuki, who can’t help but sound a little sarcastic at her pace.

“There, I qualify.”

The applause sporadically catches on with the others in the room and then drops off.

“One! More! Time!″

“Oh yeah, yeah! Can you do it with one more of the number ones?”

“Well, of course, depending on where I put it.”

“Go on, then. Amuse us.”

“......”

It’s not like I mind the request, just the attitude. Good luck getting that to change, though.

Another round of rifling for the stripes, then setup. Another round of clacks to trim the table down to a lonely cue ball once again.

“Did, uh, anyone else want to try this number, or?”

“I’m content to watch at this point, if that’s acceptable.”

“Uh-huh, uh-huh! It’s cool!”

“Yeah, dude, you totally gotta go for one more now!”

“Like, general sports rules, y’know?”

“I don’t, but sure, why not.”

More shots, more choruses of requests. At some point it ends up being more of an experiment as to where I should place everything for the best odds. It’s an interesting combination of strategizing and, of course, actually hitting the cue the way I need to. Neither of which is a problem for me, but still, there are only so many ricochets you can get before friction grinds all motion to a halt. Only so hard you can hit the cue ball, too.

Once we’re up to seven, it starts getting hairy. Still, even when I finally leave an extra ball on the table, it’s close enough to the pocket I just get demands to try it again. It takes a few tries, but finally I manage to sink them all.

Even with so few people around the table, the cheers seem extra raucous in this small space. It’s stupid, but I guess I’m a little caught up in the moment—I thonk the butt of the cue stick on the floor and blow on the other end like it’s a smoking gun. Traces of chalk drifting off enhance the effect.

“How’s that?”

“NICE!!”

“Ahahaha...”

“That... was kind of a weird laugh.”

“Oh, sorry. I just think...”

“...that’s the first time I’ve seen you smile since...”

“...”

“...in a while.”

“Is this, like, not counting the ‘I’m totally surrounded by morons’ smile, or.”

“Does that one count as a smile? It’s not super smiley.”

“..........”

“ ‘f that’s th’ one, seems off t’ me.”

“Thanks for making smiling awkward now I guess???”

“Sorry...!”

“It was... just nice.”

“...Yes.”

I don’t know how I’m supposed to respond at this point. “Sssso, do we want to move on to the semifinals?”

“Sure, dude.”

I get Mahavir and Yuki set up and step aside. It’s quickly made clear that that is going to be a very long game, so I go ahead and put Kaichi and Ichiriki at another table. Hopefully they don’t do too much damage.

Safely out of the way, I take a deep breath and try not to lean too hard against the wall. The rest of the room fades into the familiar blur of other players going about their business. Speech, clacks, rumbles. I could almost doze off.

If I wasn’t still dying of awkward over here.

It’s been that long since anyone’s seen me smile, huh? I’d believe it. There hasn’t been much to smile about.

Though it’s kind of hard to say that right now. With all of us together, cooperating, having fun... despite everything...

I don’t know how to feel about it. Glad that we have this much? Mournful for those who don’t get to share it with us now? Sickened that one of us here is probably going to ruin it all over again?

“...”

At this point, most of us are friends, aren’t we? I can’t say I trust all of these people, but... If the rest of us can stick together, there’s not much the young master can do, right?

Unless they pull another motive like the second...

But they can’t do that. We already have a motive. Right? I'm sure we’ll be hit with another if we can withstand this one, but that gives us more time. Time for someone out there to realize we’ve been taken, or time for us to make our own way out.

If that’s what working together can get us... I’ll just have to be sure not to waste it.

[BACK] [NEXT]

#apexplot #apex5 #fanganronpa

2 notes · View notes

revisionaryhistory · 3 years

Text

Three Days ~ 55

~*~Sebastian~*~

I stared at her. Stunned. I'm not sure if it's how the conversation went or she wants me and whatever comes with me. Emma is so intentional. Her words carry meaning. She wants to be clear and asks for clarity. This is heaven for my overthinking brain. I’m not stuck wondering what she means nor am I afraid to ask. Because I know she'll answer. Really answer.

"I've got eight years on you, how are you the more mature one?"

"Stabilizing influence and frighteningly direct communication of my second dad."

The expression on her face and deadpanned delivery had me laughing. "I can see that. I'll be the emotionally reactive one and you can be the calming one." Then I remembered. "Although, Eli did tell a story about you laying into some guy in Hawaii at a volleyball game. Ed dumped you in the ocean. I wish there was video."

"There is. You'll have to get dad to send it to you."

Tuesday was a good day. Workout was hard and my abs were already sore, but we'd laughed a lot. Good phone call with mom. The house had come together, she was enjoying some time in the pool, and she'd picked up some piano students. My afternoon was spent in my manager, Emily's, office. Mostly she and I, but a few conference calls. I was about to be busy. The next six weeks I was more gone than home. I was excited about the work. Excited to see friends.

Admittedly, the timing wasn't the greatest, new relationship and all, but I was confident we'd figure it out. This is different. I'd like to say it was because my previous experience is whining and bitching about me being gone so long, knowing I was going to pay for the distance, and trying to front-load my leaving to make it more palatable. While all of those all true, the actual difference is I care. The emotionally unavailable hot and cold thing comes into play here. I put up a wall to block the whining and bitching, not really listening, because it's my job. Bitching at me isn’t going to change anything and I’m not going to feel guilty for doing my job. Well, I do, but it just pisses me off because I shouldn’t. The expectation of gifts, dinners, or a vacation to make up for being gone made those a lot less fun. And I was never successful at cramming a bunch of stuff in before I left, because my work didn't start when I left. It starts weeks before. I don’t leave for filming for a month, but I’m already prepping: gym reading, watching things, research, and studying the script. I get pretty singularly focused. I don't know any other way. And when pushed I shut down. I don't respond. I brood. And I appear cold. None of this is right. Some just is. Some is my fault. Getting to where I didn't care about her (any of the previous hers) feelings and concerns with me gone was a side effect of shutting down and I regret doing that. It wasn’t that I didn’t care about her feelings. It was feeling ineffectual to do anything about it and my self-protection kicking in. Looking back, saying effectively “deal with it” was incredibly insensitive. Not proud of it.

But now, sitting here looking at my schedule I’m finding places I can find some time for us. We’ll figure it out. I can tell you what won’t happen. Emma won't whine where I block her out. She's not going to emotionally blackmail me for things, which will make me want to give. And she’ll leave me alone to prep, let me bounce things off her, or cook something to remind me to eat. I need all of those. I care how Emma's going to feel about me being gone. I care about what we’ve begun and how we'll keep in touch. I also know that while I'm away she will carry on living the life she had before she had me and be just fine.

Emma had practice tonight and a game tomorrow. It was after eight when she called. She was in a tank top and her hair was wet from her shower. I caught up on her day before leading into mine. "I have good news and bad news."

"OK." Emma drug out the word, wary of my response.

"When I get back from Canada, I've got some time to spend with you. Then I’m gone for the month of July. Fashion show, audition and meetings, comic con, then filming in Rome." Playing off last night’s conversation, I added. "I'm not expecting a bad reaction."

"Well, that's good." Her hand moved toward the screen and I chose to believe she was touching my face. "I'II miss you, but I’m excited for you. And me getting to hear about what you're doing. Living vicariously."

I'd had some time to think. I had a lot of thoughts on plans. This was the soonest. "You get back Tuesday, doubleheader Wednesday, and I get back late Thursday. What's your weekend look like?"

"Empty. I'll come to you. You'll barely be home if you come here. I can come anytime Friday. I'll be done with work except maybe packing up my room. I can do that whenever."

"Early Friday. Thursday night." I wanted to maximize our time. "I have to do some work."

"I can amuse myself."

"Maybe the shop you liked so much will be having a sale?" I laughed at the way her eyes lit up. "July fourth weekend I'm at a fashion show. Wanna go to Paris?"

"What?" Her face moved closer to the screen. I’d surprised her.

"Not necessarily Paris, but near. The third is the show. Have you been to Paris?"

"Family spent the summer in Europe when we were thirteen. Then Pearl Jam tours. Love Paris."

"Not much more than a long weekend, but museums and I'm sure we can find some romantic Paris shit to do."

"I would love to go to Paris with you."

That was good because I'd already made reservations. "California for about two weeks then straight to Italy for at least that. Depends on how long shooting takes. Hopefully back in time to join you in Chicago. Then nothing until the end of August. Will and I had been talking about a group of us going away. We were waiting for my schedule. What do you think about a group trip and we stay a little longer or go off alone? It would be a beach somewhere."

"You going to rub sunscreen on me?"

"Um yay, part of my volleyball job. Beer bitch and sunscreen applier."

“I’m in."

"End of August is a Disney thing. Labor Day weekend is the Toronto Film Fest. Little stuff in there, nothing big. No idea past then."

She laughed, eyes wide, and moving her head in all directions "It's crazy like a tour schedule. I'm jealous. I love touring."

"I thought about Rome, but the schedule's tight. You wouldn't see me."

"I wasn't trying for an invite. I'll get some of my summer PD hours done so I won't have to worry about them. Make sure I've got time for us."

I leaned back on the couch, "That was easy."

She glared at me. "I thought you weren't expecting a bad reaction?"

I shook my head, "No, no, I wasn't. Just an observation. Thought I might have to talk you into the beach." I held it a second before smiling, "Not really. I do know it’s a lot."

"I will always go to a beach."

"You’re not allowed to play volleyball."

"Did you get the video from dad?"

"About an hour ago." I'd enjoyed it several times. "You're a feisty little thing."

Wednesday was a day of pictures and texts. After the gym, I settled in my extra room to prep. I had my laptop on the table, a stack of books on top of my script, and a huge bottle of water. I took a picture and posted it to Instagram along with one of me with a pencil between my teeth and pulling my hair.

Emma ~ How'd you get a picture of your expression during your last blow job?

Sebastian ~ Hidden camera in bedroom. You should see the other things I have. Coupling Season 1. "The Cupboard of Patrick's Love."

Emma ~ “You really don't have enough blood for both ends of your body, do you?"

Sebastian ~ Very good, Sally.

Love that she can quote one of my favorite shows.

After lunch, Emma posted a picture of her in the middle of a group hug with her students. "I'll miss my munchkins.” I sent a sad face emoji.

Then I fell into a hole. I got pulled into my research and reading and the next time I picked up my phone it was one a.m. I need time like this and put my phone on do not disturb. The only thing that comes through is two calls from the same number within a few minutes. Anyone important knows how to reach me. Emma knew, but she didn't. Not even when the Demonic Crickets won their game. She posted several pictures, but I got a much better one in a text. Emma with her back to the camera in her team tank, arm up flexing her bicep, and her looking over her shoulder smiling at me. The gold flecks in her eyes were sparkling and the darker ring made the green more intense.

Emma ~ Hope you're getting a lot done. Internally anyway. XOXO

Sebastian ~ * 12 hours later * Yeah, I did. I'm hungry. Congrats on the win. Picture is beautiful.

Sebastian ~ You're beautiful

Her thank you came while I was working out. After a shower, I fell back into my hole until it was time for therapy.

I'd been seeing Celie for a long time. Frequency varied. She had a dark brown bob, glasses, and a round face. At this point, I could read her as well as she could me. If she was looking at me over her glasses, she thought I was full of shit. No words needed. She was about ten years older than me and her style worked for me. It was a great one-sided friendship.

I took my regular spot on the blue couch, "How are you today, Celie?"

Celie smiled. She had the unconditional positive regard thing down. I say that, but she does genuinely like me. Most of the time. I can be a pain in the ass. "I've had a good day and after you I get to go home. You seem to be in a good mood. Tell what's going on with you, Seb."

I was always her last client of the day. Sometimes I needed more than an hour. "I am in a good mood. I met somebody. Last time I saw you I was going to help my parents move. I met Emma there. In a grocery store, if you can believe that."

"Sounds like you can't."

"I asked her to dinner in under fifteen minutes."

She widened her eyes in disbelief. Exactly my point. "Did you? Good for you, Seb. A complete stranger. What led you to ask her out?"

"I was all covered up and she tells me I looked like a rehab patient checking into the clinic up the road. But she was kind to me. A sketchy stranger. She didn’t know who I was until we were outside and I introduced myself. She helped me find the things on my list and we chatted." I put my hands in front of my chest, fingers splayed. "She felt good. I didn't know why, just enough that I knew I wanted to know more.”

“And what do you know now?”

I spent the next several minutes telling Celie the salient points. We’ve been doing this long enough that explaining isn’t necessary. She’ll recognize why things are important. My face hurt from smiling after I was finished talking about Emma. I stopped short of the whole conversation on Sunday.

“Besides the obvious early relationship high, how are you feeling about all this?”

“Good. Happy. Hopeful. The only concerning thing was Saturday I woke up from a night terror, panic attack. I got myself calmed down pretty quick, wrote for a while, and once Emma got up I went for a run.”

“Even with being happy, there’s been quite a bit of emotional activity. I’m pleased that you’ve only woken up once. Much better. What do you suspect triggered you?”

I took a deep breath, “Emma and I wound up in this conversation Sunday afternoon. A couple of my friends at the party had told her I wasn’t acting like I normally do with women, but more like I am with friends. This led to a conversation about my relationship issues. I’m not the same with her. She really doesn’t know that version of me. I think that’s why I had the anxiety. It was the night after the party but before the conversation. First time we’d been around my friends. I think it was not because I’m scared, but because I’m not. Like you said, there’s been a lot of emotional shit going on and I’m good. Remarkably good.”

“Why do you think that is?”

“Emma is different. She’s incredibly kind and is . . . gentle. Not weak though. She’s strong.”

Celie shook her head, “When I think of gentle people it’s a combination. They can be painfully truthful, but their manner makes others able to listen. They have a compassion for others.”

“Exactly! I noticed she knew everyone. She talked to everyone and used their name. I asked and she said she looked at their nametags and you never know what someone’s day has been. That might be the first nice thing that’s happened all day. I know it’s a little thing, but it’s her. She’s like that with me. She doesn’t try to talk me out of being anxious or overthinking. She doesn’t think my insecurities are stupid. They’re all just part of me.”

“She accepts you.”

“Right. The more we got to know each other, the more we talked, I felt safe. She doesn’t do those things I usually shut down over. I don’t feel the need to protect myself. She’s very different.” Celie was looking at me over her glasses. Uh oh. “You’re giving me the look.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Why? I thought I was doing good. I asked out a stranger and got this amazing woman.”

“Sebastian, as quick as you are to fault yourself, you’re slow to take credit.”

“Take credit?” I didn’t know what she was talking about.

She leaned forward, putting her elbows on her knees. “You think this relationship is different because of Emma. You lucked out and met an accepting, kind, gentle person.”

“Yes. No. Both. Emma is different and she makes me different.”

Celie made a loud, jarring beeping noise. This was new.

“Ok, I guess I’m wrong.”

“You are. Not completely. You’re not giving yourself enough credit. Any credit. You’ve worked very hard. You’ve read. You’ve journaled. You’ve talked. You’ve done things I’ve asked you to even if you didn’t understand or want to. I’ve seen you grow. To give responsibility for this relationship being different all to Emma is dangerous. What’s going to happen when she falls off this pedestal you’ve put her on? Is that going to be an excuse to shut down and protect yourself? Fall back on old habits.”

I could feel my eyebrows pulled down and the scowl on my face. “So you’re saying this isn’t as good as I think it is.”

“Not at all. I’m saying it’s got as much to do with you as it does her. Previously you would have never asked out a woman you met in a grocery. But that seems to be the furthest you’re going with how you’re different. I do not believe for one second that no other woman you’ve gone out with has been kind and accepting. Or would have been if you would have been able to show them you. You used to do things to test them. You’d say or do things to see how they’d react. As we’ve talked, you weren’t being real, so you don’t know that their reactions were.”

I nodded then looked down, “I know. Pretty manipulative.” I felt Celie’s hand on my arm and looked back up. Her face was very soft with a smile.

“Stop, Seb. You need to be proud of yourself. You are doing things differently. You have learned from your past, grown, and come a long way in accepting yourself. Warts and all. You have shown Emma who you are, even the parts you don’t like so much. She can have credit for how she’s responded to you, but you deserve the credit for being brave enough to show her in an honest and authentic way. That allowed her to respond in an equally honest and authentic way.”

I grabbed a tissue from the ever-present box on the table and wiped the wet from my face. Neither the first nor the last time I’d cry in this room.

"If you had met her even a year ago, with her exactly as she is now, this relationship would be very different."

"The wedding."

"Excuse me?"

Yeah, non sequitur. "I was supposed to go to a friend’s wedding last summer but didn't because there was a change in my shooting schedule. Emma was at the wedding. You're right. Had I met her then," I shook my head. “I wouldn't have been ready for her and now could have never happened."

Celie shrugged, "Probably not."

I sniffed and wiped my eyes, "How do I get her off this pedestal I’ve put her on?"

"You seem pretty smitten. Maybe not take her off, just lower it a little." I laughed and she went on. "What you do is own your part. You have been making choices to improve yourself. You have been making choices to go out of your comfort zone. And you have been making choices to let her know you. Emma's been making similar choices to be with you. I'm sure you know what she's come through to be where she is. It seems like you complement each other. Recognize this is both of you waking up and choosing to be with each other. Talk and negotiate what that means. Tell her what you want. And when you're not talking you listen. Listen to what she needs from you. The most important for you is to keep processing the feelings with her. She's the only one who can help those make a picture. And you need to give her the same gift. She has things she’s not so proud of and afraid for you to know about her. We all do. You will need to accept her and treat her with gentle kindness she gives you.”

I was crying again. "She told me. I told her she was different than the others. She asked if maybe I was different."

Celie snickered, "I like her."

"You would. She speaks therapy."

"I want to be very clear, Seb. She sounds wonderful and she may make you better. You sound wonderful and I bet you make her better too. That’s how it should work in a relationship. You help each other along. It takes two people with self-awareness making choices to do what it takes. You both have to choose growth, honestly, humility, vulnerability, and sacrifice. I hear you holding up your end. I’ve not heard you do this before. And while she may be the right woman, you've become the right man. Please, please, do not underestimate how much work you've put in to become the right man for another person.”

"I want to go home and cry for an hour or so."

"I wish Emma was here for you."

I shook my head with a grimace, "It's going to be ugly until I get it out."

"Yes. I think Emma would want to be there to hold you and you'd find more acceptance and comfort in that than you can imagine."

At home, I grabbed a beer, sank down in my favorite chair, and cried. I felt everything all at once but fought to untangle the threads. Sad was remnants of the past and dissipated quickly. Its friends regret and shame fought a little harder to stick around, but they were toxic and needed to go. Pride and relief were together too. Celie was right. I had worked hard. An infinite number of hours had gone into figuring myself out. There have been so many times I thought I'd be stuck forever. Sometime in the last two years that I've been without a girlfriend, all the work must have come together. In the last two years I've been filming almost nonstop. Five movies have come out. Two of which were Marvel circuses. It's like all the therapy (and the work that goes with it) knitted me back together while I was busy filming and living my life. Celie had told me to trust the process. I couldn't rush it or make changes happen before it was time. Patience. I am inherently impatient. Pride was for the work. Relief was for seeing results. Finally.

Next was happy. I’m in a good place. I'm excited about the movie I’m making. I have supportive, fun friends, and a loving family. I don't need a girlfriend to be happy, but one does bring everything together. I like having a person who is mine. Mine in the sense of us experiencing life together. The good and bad. I like that. I want that. And now I have it. The beginnings of it, anyway.

After I pulled my shit together, I wanted to talk to Emma. I wanted support. Maybe not support, but I felt raw. I wanted someone to soothe the raw nerves, to sit with me while all this new stuff integrated. I wish she was here. What I needed was a hug.

Sebastian ~ Can you talk?

I don't like that I asked. It feels insecure and I have zero reasons to feel insecure. I quickly decided to cut myself some slack.

My phone rang and I connected to FaceTime. "Hey." Her bright smile and obvious happiness to see me did wonders to soothe those raw nerves.

Emma's face went from a smile to wide-eyed concern. "Sebastian, what’s wrong? You look like you've been crying. What happened?" Before I could answer, she jumped to a correct conclusion. "You had therapy. Good, bad, or cathartic tears?"

"Mostly the last one."

Her hand went to her chest, "Ok." She picked up what I assumed was her iPad and crossed to the chair in her bedroom. I could see her pull her knees up when she put her feet on the ottoman. She rested the iPad on her knees.

"Mostly a repeat of what we talked about Sunday. Celie said I wasn't giving myself enough credit for the work I've done. My growth."

As Emma had alluded to the same thing, I expected a smile or some acknowledgment of her asking if I was different. Instead, I got, "What do you think?"

"I think I still need to work on not being so hard on myself." I smiled because that statement was me still being hard on myself. "When Celie pointed out how I've changed I could see it and was proud of myself. I can’t see it on my own yet, but I'll get there. I never thought anyone would get past my walls. It wasn't someone getting in, it was me getting out." More goddamned tears.

Emma reached out and touched the screen. "I‘m so happy for you. Proud of you too."

Her words felt like a hug. Close enough for now. "Thank you."

"I know you're a grown man, but I wish I was there. Crying alone sucks."

"Oh," I laughed a little, "the chances of us having a messy reunion are high."

"Why?"

"A lot of you and I talk today. I know me, it's gonna hit me when I see you."

"I should warn you. I have a strict policy that nobody cries alone in my presence."

I smiled at her exaggerated southern accent with the "Steel Magnolias" quote. "See ... gonna be messy."

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan fanfiction #fanfiction

9 notes · View notes

spicykoreantatertots · 4 years

Text

roadtrip - part two

pairing: yoongi x reader

genre: angst, fluff, and eventually smut; high school au, friends to lovers au

warnings: hospital, medical stuff, anxiety, angsty high schoolers being angsty high schoolers

word count: 3.5k

summary: After your friend and long time crush, Min Yoongi, has a near death experience, you realize that your friend group is starting to grow apart. A cross country road trip brings adventure, bonding, tourist attractions, and romance. But will it be enough to salvage your friendships?

part one - part two - part three

The final bell rings at school and everyone excitedly spills out into the hallways. Most people are headed to club meetings, sports practice, or to meet up with friends. You rush to the main office to pick up Yoongi’s homework packets. He’ll be missing another two weeks of class and with finals coming up, you and Namjoon promised to help him stay caught up.

You stop short of the office when you see Hoseok and Ami walking toward the gym for tennis practice. You take a deep breath, planning to call out to them, but something stops you. An uneasy feeling rising in your chest. You don’t want to interrupt the conversation they seem to be enjoying so much. Ami is laughing pretty hard... Instead, you continue into the office and pick up the hefty envelope with Yoongi’s name scrawled across it.

The band hall is the last stop before heading to your car and driving the now familiar route to the hospital. After mulling over the day’s less-than-exciting events you turn your attention to the French Horn case carefully placed in the passenger seat. It’s staring back at you, making you feel a bit guilty. Since Yoongi’s accident five days ago, you had visited him in the hospital everyday. Spending hours at the hospital with him (and usually at least two or three other friends) meant less time spent practicing.

You had been enjoying the time you’ve spent at the hospital, helping Yoongi with his homework between card games and planning movie nights you had all agreed to have in the summer. Remembering the time spent with your friends over the past few days brings an uncontrollable smile to your face as you step off the elevator and walk to Yoongi’s room. You feel really happy for the first time in a while.

Lightly knocking on the door, you poke your head into the room before entering. Yoongi is laying in the bed as per usual, but the doctor and a nurse are standing over him. Yoongi gives you a small wave as you walk in. His mother sitting next to the bed, frantically typing on her laptop. She hadn’t been here in a few days, work is surely keeping her busy.

“Go ahead and lift your shirt for me.” The doctor instructs Yoongi. You intended to look away, but you catch a glimpse of his form and your eyes can’t help but linger. Under the harsh lighting of the hospital room, his body looks even more thin and pale than ever. The next thing you notice are the bruises that are finally becoming slightly less purple and more yellow. The doctor then reaches down to pull back the bandaging across your friend’s abdomen. This is when you decide to avert your eyes.

“It actually looks like you’re healing well. What’s your pain level today?” You are looking out the window, but you can tell the nurse is now putting fresh bandages on the wound.

“Maybe a three?” Yoongi responds before he sharply inhales. You look up to see the doctor pressing firmly on his stomach.

“Mr. Min, I know you’re ready to go home but I think you need to stay at least another day or two.” The doctor continues to tell the nurse to add this or reduce that, lots of medical terms you can’t quite wrap your brain around.

“Hey.” Yoongi smiles over at you when they finally leave. He pushes himself up into a sitting position.

“Hi. How are you feeling?” You move your chair to the side of his bed opposite from his mother. The three of you make small talk for a few minutes before Mrs. Min quickly puts her laptop away and stands.

“Well I’ve got to run a few errands. I’ll leave you two alone.” The look on her face causes you to blush against your will. The crush you’ve had on Yoongi over the years has come and gone many times, so it’s not surprising that she seems to know about it.

Mrs. Min squeezes Yoongi’s hand before leaving the room. You pull today’s work out of your backpack and hand it to Yoongi.

“Should we start with English today or Stats?” You’re hoping he will wait until Namjoon or Ami stop by to work on his Statistics homework because you still aren’t sure if you fully understand the lesson yourself.

“Well...” he starts, looking thoughtfully at you, “there may or may not be a Harry Potter marathon on ABC right now.” He reaches for the remote, scooting over in the upright hospital bed. He knows you can’t resist a Harry Potter marathon. Without hesitation you join him on the narrow bed, your side flush with his. As the two of you settle in, he grabs your hand and laces your fingers together. Skinship amongst friends isn’t new to you, but skinship coming from Yoongi is. You feel the blush returning to your cheeks.

Yoongi turns on the tv and you can see that third Harry Potter movie was just starting. The movie is entertaining enough, but soon Yoongi is asking you about your day, wanting even the mundane details. Apparently he’s been very bored within the walls of the hospital.

“Oh and I ran into Hoseok and Ami on their way to Tennis practice.”

“The gym is a long way from the band hall.” He laughs when you roll your eyes. “Well what did they say?”

“I didn’t get a chance to talk to them, actually.”

“I thought you said you ran into them?” he questioned.

“Well they were busy so I didn’t want to bother them.” You let out a sigh.

“So I guess things haven’t changed that much then.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You sit up slightly from the bed and look back at him. He’s looking at the TV.

“Ever since my accident you’ve been here talking about how you missed your friends and you’re planning movie nights, trying to get everyone together, but you won’t even talk to Hoseok at school.”

“It’s different there...” You begin to chew on your bottom lip.

“He would have been happy to see you. Anyone would be happy to see you outside of a practice room.” Yoongi continued. “I guess... I thought you... I thought things would really be different.” You pull your hand from his grip to rub your face.

“Well you’re one to talk.” You half mumble. Who is he to say these things when I pretty much haven’t heard from him since his last basketball game?

The awkward silence between the two of you only lasts for a moment because there’s a knock on the door. You look over to see Namjoon standing in the doorway. How long has he been standing there? The look on his face shows that he heard at least some of the conversation.

“Hey. Oh, Harry Potter marathon, nice.” He takes a seat at the small table on the other side of the room. You stand from the bed and pick up the envelope of homework.

“We’ve got English and Statistics today.” You say as you hand the work to Namjoon. He opens the packet and starts to pull out the worksheets.

The night progresses slowly as the three of you work on your assignments together. The three of you huddled around the small table. The movie marathon still playing in the background. After giving up on the statistics homework you begin to think of ideas for your English assignment. It’s the weekly creative writing assignment.

Write one page about the last thing that made you smile.

You look over at Yoongi, he was the last thing that made you smile and also the last thing that upset you. His brows are furrowed, he’s clearly thinking about something. You realize he’s also started the English assignment. He’s got about a quarter of a page so far. You can’t quite make out the words on his page, but you can’t help but wish they are about you.

“I don’t know what to write about. What are you writing about?” You ask, looking down at your own blank page.

“I’m writing about the last thing that made me smile.” A smirk creeps across Yoongi’s face. He doesn’t even look up from the page. Before you can respond Namjoon chimes in.

“I’m writing about Monie.” He smiles brightly, his dimples coming into view. You suppose you could just make something up. Creative writing has never been easy for you, but you probably could write a few pages about Min Yoongi...

After about an hour, you manage to bullshit a decent paper about how successfully playing a difficult piece of music made your chest swell with pride and a smile shine brightly across your face. Yoongi and Namjoon finished a while ago. They were picking at the food tray that was dropped off for Yoongi’s dinner.

“Well...” You stand and stretch your arms over your head. “I should probably get home so I can practice before bed. Do you want us to go get you some real food first?” You point at the mushy looking meal in front of Yoongi, but he shakes his head.

“Jimin and Jungkook are on their way with pizza if you want to stay, though.” Yoongi says, but you shake your head.

“I’ll go with you.” Namjoon reaches for his bag. “My shift starts in an hour.”

You walk over to the bed that Yoongi has settled back into. You place your hand over his and give him a small smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Thanks for coming.” His eyes meet yours for the first time in a while. He looks tired.

~~~~~~~

“I heard the... argument? What was that about?” Namjoon turned to you in the elevator. You were hoping he wouldn’t bring it up. You try to think for a moment, not really sure where to start. You try to briefly explain the situation.

“So he basically called me a hypocrite for not talking to Ami and Hoseok at school.” You finish quickly when the elevator doors open on the ground floor. “I guess he’s right.”

“No, that’s not totally fair.” Namjoon quickly responds. “He knows about your anxiety. It��s not that simple.”

“I just... I hate disappointing Yoongi.” You pause as you reach your car and look up at your friend.

“Are your feelings for him coming back?” Namjoon looks down at you, already knowing the answer. He’s been there for you through several bouts of being love struck by Yoongi. There have been other crushes and a couple of boyfriends, but Yoongi was different.

You lean your forehead against Namjoon’s chest and sigh as he wraps his arms around you. “Joonie... I’ve loved that boy since I first laid eyes on him.”

~~~~~~~

After an hour of mediocre practice, you decide to get ready for bed. While brushing your teeth, you absentmindedly cycle through the social media platforms to see various celebrities living it up and acquaintances from school posting thirsty selfies. A message pops up in your notifications. An Instagram direct message from @lilmeowmeow.

You chuckle to yourself. It was the nickname your friends called Yoongi back in the day. You tap the notification to see what he sent.

Yoongi: I’m sorry about earlier today...

@lilmeowmeow sent a post

You can’t help but laugh (and almost choke on spit and toothpaste) at the video of a kitten chasing a laser pointer. Yoongi knows that cute animal videos are the quickest way to earn your forgiveness. You double tap his message to let him know all is well.

~~~~~~~

The new after school routine continues the next day. Pick up Yoongi’s homework, grab your French Horn, and head to the hospital. Upon your arrival, you notice Jin is standing outside the room.

“Hey, what’s up?” You nod toward the closed door to Yoongi’s room. Jin notices the flash of worry that crosses your face momentarily.

“Nothing, the doctor wanted to talk to Yoongi and his mom alone.” You let out a quiet sigh of relief and lean against the wall next to Jin. “Does he have a lot of work today?”

“I think it’s just statistics. I swear she’s trying to drown us. I mean we’ve got three weeks left of school and she’s the only one still giving real assignments.” Jin nods along to your complaints absentmindedly. “What’s going on with you, Jinnie?” You bump him lightly with your shoulder.

“Oh, I’m just tired.” he leans his head back against the wall. You look tired, Jinnie. When did we all start looking so tired all the time? “I’ve been staying up here until they kick me out around one or two.”

“Oh my gosh. And don’t you have theater practice at seven?”

“Only for a few more days. The play is on Friday. You’re still coming, right?” He looks over at you expectantly.

“Of course I am.” Oh shit I almost forgot. Mental note: pick up some flowers for Jin, Jimin, and Taehyung on Friday. “Why have you been staying so late?”

“Well, Yoongi hasn’t been sleeping well in the hospital and I hate to leave him alone at night.” Jin responds.

“If you want to take the night off, I’ll stay late tonight.” You look over at Jin who has now closed his eyes.

“What about practicing?” He asks, eyes remaining closed.

“Yoongi did say I should spend less time practicing and more time with friends.” Jin lets out a small chuckle.

“I’m sure he did say that. He’s missed you.” Your heart skips a beat. It’s nothing. You’ve missed your friends too.

“Oh?” You try to hide the surprise in your voice. Jin laughs. He’s known you just as long as Namjoon and Yoongi and he knows about your feelings toward Yoongi. He turns to you when he stops laughing.

“Of course, Y/N. We all have.” See he didn’t mean anything by it. “Well maybe Yoongi’s missed you a bit more.” The wink Jin gives you sends your heart a flutter again. Your friends have often hinted that your feelings may not be totally unrequited, but you’ve never been bold enough to make a move. Just the thought of admitting your feelings to Yoongi knots your stomach. Before you can prod for more information from Jin, the door finally opens.

A doctor you don’t recognize leaves and he is followed by Mrs. Min. The doctor is dressed in a suit rather than the usual scrubs and white coat; you can’t help but eye him suspiciously. Mrs. Min gives you a small wave before heading off to the elevator. Jin heads into the room and you follow behind him.

“How did it go?” Jin takes a seat at the end of the bed, and you take the seat next to the bed. Yoongi looks so defeated. His only response is to shake his head. “How much longer do they want to keep you?” Yoongi shakes his head again, looking like he might be close to tears. Your heart drops at the sight and your hand instinctively finds his.

“How bad is the homework today?” Yoongi asks as he blinks back the tears that have formed in his eyes.

“Just another page or two of stats...” you answer softly, with your head bowed. “You know, I could just do it for you today. It doesn’t look that bad.” You look over at Yoongi again, he’s smiling now.

“I appreciate the offer, but I would like to pass the class.” A small wave of relief crashes over you as your friends begin to laugh.

“You really are terrible at math, Y/N.” Jin adds. Jin lets out a big sigh and flops his body across the foot of the bed. You all sit in silence for a few moments before Yoongi speaks again.

“Jin you’re already falling asleep. Just go home dude.” Jin’s eyes remained closed. “Jimin promised to bring tacos for dinner so you don’t have to stay. I’m sure he’ll bring Tae or Mina with him.”

“Oh well I told Jin I would stay late tonight so he could get some rest anyway.” Yoongi looks surprised.

“You did?”

“She did.” A small smile spreads across Jin’s face.

“But only if you want me to.”

“Of course I want you to.” Yoongi responds quickly and you try not to smile.

It seems as though Jin is trying to fall asleep. Yoongi lets go of your hand and moves to get up from the bed. You try not to notice how his dark gray sweatpants hug his hips in just the right place.

“Let’s go for a walk. I think he needs a nap.” Without hesitation Jin takes over the bed without opening his eyes. You hold back a laugh as you follow Yoongi out of the room. “God I’ve been in that bed all fucking day.” He stretches his arms above his head as you walk down the hallway and you finally realize that he’s been disconnected from all his machinery.

“So if they unhooked you from all the stuff, why do they want you to stay longer?” Yoongi hesitates to respond as you round a corner.

“It’s complicated.” He pauses for a moment as though he’s trying to think of a response. “Can we talk about literally anything else?” He clearly doesn’t want to talk about it, so you drop the topic.

The cold and sterile hallway soon gives way to the bustling nurse’s station. A series of large counters connect to form a circle at the junction of several different hallways. About a dozen men and women dressed in brightly colored scrubs are working at different stations. Yoongi briefly introduces you to a few of the ones he’s come to know over the past few days.

“Hey there handsome. Good to see you walking around.” A beautiful young nurse smiles at Yoongi as the two of you approach her station. Is he blushing? You try to swallow the lump forming in your throat.

“Hey Rachel, this is Y/N.” She’s smiling brightly at you.

“Oh I’ve heard a lot about you.” Did she just wink at me? Suddenly the lump in your throat vanishes.

“Oh really?” You giggle. Yoongi clears his throat and grabs your wrist to pull you away from Rachel’s station. “Nice to meet you!” You call back to her, still laughing. Yoongi leads you to the elevator and presses the button for the second floor, the cafeteria.

“So you talk about me to the nurses?” You prod.

“I also talk to them about the rashes I got from the steroids they gave me, so don’t feel too special.” He laughs, his cheeks still a rosy color.

A mixture of mostly pleasant smells hit you as the elevator door opens.

“Wow...” Is all you can manage to say. The large space was filled with tables and chairs and a variety of stations from soups and salads to burgers and pasta. Most of the tables were full of people eating dinner. Some hospital staff, but mostly people who looked like visitors. You look around for a moment before your eyes land on the dessert station. Your eyes widen as you survey the plates full of cake, brownies, cookies and finally, the soft serve machine.

“And that’s why we’re here.” You are brought back to reality only to notice Yoongi smiling down at you and the dumb look on your face. “They’ve got chocolate and vanilla swirl.” Your slack jaw quickly turns to a wide smile.

“You know me so well, Min Yoongi.” You grab his hand and carefully lead him to the ice cream machine. After making two too-big ice cream cones, Yoongi leads you to a table next to a large window that looks out into a small courtyard area where a group of five boys are passing a soccer ball back and forth.

Your conversation about soccer doesn’t last very long, but your conversation about the courtyard’s questionable landscaping lasts surprisingly long. The overgrown shrubs and lack of biodiversity really seem to annoy Yoongi. Your gaze falls from the window and meets his dark eyes. You feel the blood running to your cheeks again.

“I’ve really enjoyed spending so much time with you these past few days.” Your thoughts seem to be spilling out of your mouth rather than staying inside your head. “I really have missed you.”

“Yeah?” Yoongi smirks. “I have too.” His eyes drop to his hands. He’s fiddling with a napkin.

“Yoongi, I love you.” Words continue to fall out of your mouth before you can stop them. But it’s not a confession of romantic feelings. You reach over a squeeze Yoongi’s hand. His eyes find yours again.

“I love you too, Y/N.” Your heart is beating fast, but try not to analyze his words or tone or the way he’s looking at you. You just accept this platonic love from your friend and for now, it’s enough.

Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! I know we didn’t see much of the maknae line in this chapter, but they’ll be back! I welcome all questions and comments about this fic! Always need feedback! I’ve got lots planned for this fic and we are just getting started!

I’m just getting started in the fan fic community, so let’s be friends! Need beta readers and more than happy to be a beta reader! Let’s collab or just chat for a bit! :)

Big thanks to @maptoyoongi for proof reading for me. Love you! <3

171 notes · View notes

timelordthirteen · 6 years

Text

Working Out - Part 14

Mr. Gold/Belle French, Teen+

Summary: Mr. Gold, hopelessly in love with Belle French, the town librarian, overhears a conversation between her Ruby about the appeal of well muscled, beefy men. Misinterpreting that this is Belle’s type of man, he joins the local gym to work out. Rather unsuccessfully. Based on a prompt from an anonymous benefactor. :)

Chapter Summary: Belle and Gold chat with their workout partners about their last date, Ruby and David get in some good natured teasing, and plans are made for a very important next date.

Notes: AAAAAHHHHHHH! I cannot tell you how much this chapter fought me until a wonderful person left some amazing comments as they read their way through this fic which completely changed my perspective and helped me finish this chapter up in less than three days. The power of comments, dear readers. Also the end is nigh. This was going to be the last chapter, but too many things needed to happen, so the next one is probably the last for the main fic.

[AO3] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Part 8] [Part 9] [Part 10]

[Part 11] [Part 12] [Part 13] [Part 14]

Belle couldn’t stop smiling the rest of the night after Gold left her apartment.

In the days since, she and Gold had two lunch dates at Granny’s, and a lovely picnic in the back of his shop while it stormed outside. The back room was cozy and warm, and the rain on the windows was soothing. They sat on the cot together, talking over egg salad sandwiches, and somewhere in the middle of a story about his childhood, she realized she was in love with him.

He was explaining how his eight-year-old self hid a pet frog from his aunties in a shoe box for almost two weeks, until it got out and ended up in the toilet, scaring Aunt Millie. He insisted that he was very contrite and apologetic, but still ended up in a heap of trouble. She was grinning like an idiot, watching his hands become more and more animated while he mimicked his aunt running around the flat flailing her arms, and the feelings were just - there. They were the same emotions she’d felt that night in her apartment, but now they were somehow sharper, clearer than ever before.

That was two days ago, and she felt like she’d been walking in a daze ever since. They hadn’t made any plans to go out for what they both seemed to consider official dates, but she was hoping to catch him tonight at the gym and make plans for the weekend. She was almost bursting with the urge to tell him her feelings, but she wanted to wait and make their next time together as special as it could be. They both deserved that after everything it had taken to get here.

“So, that was your...third date?” Ruby asked, lifting her eyebrows and smirking.

“I guess,” Belle replied absently as she fiddled with the settings on the elliptical machine.

Tuesday at four found Belle and Ruby at the gym, as had become customary. They tried to meet at least three days a week in the gym, and fill the other workout days with running or yoga. It was a good routine, and it meant she got to see Gold at least twice more during the week, even if it was from across the fitness center. She hoped he’d be in tonight so that perhaps they could make plans for the weekend.

She clipped one end of the safety strap to her shirt, and then frowned at Ruby. “Why?”

“Uh, Belles, the third date?”

Her emphasis on third and date did nothing to help Belle’s confusion, and after a few seconds of blank staring, Ruby rolled her eyes. “Oh come on! Everyone knows that three is the magic number.”

Belle shook her head and pushed the other end of the safety strap into the slot on the machine, enabling it to start. “Magic how?” she asked, bumping up the speed until she could settle into a comfortable rhythm.

Ruby blinked at her, dumbfounded. “Seriously? That’s like the make or break date.” Then she smirked and leaned over. “You’re either going to have sex, or start reevaluating the relationship. And if the sex is bad, maybe you do that anyway, right?”

The mention of sex made Belle stumble and the elliptical shut off as the safety card slipped out. “What?” She righted herself and gave Ruby a look. “Is this some stupid thing you read in Cosmo?”

Ruby put up her hands. “I was just teasing.” Then she poked a couple of buttons, and looked sideways at Belle. “It’s not exactly a bad rule though. I mean by the third date something has to advance, right?”

Belle frowned and climbed back on the elliptical machine, and reset the program. It beeped and she started moving at a steady pace. “Yeah,” she said. “I guess. But I think we’ve already had that moment.”

It was Ruby’s turn to stagger and almost fall off the equipment. “What?”

Belle giggled. “I didn’t mean that. Not - not exactly.”

Her friend gave her a sideways look. “What do you mean by not exactly?”

She bit her lip and slowed her speed a couple of notches. “He, um, came up to my place,” she said. “For tea.”

A slow smile spread over Ruby’s face. “Oh really?” Belle nodded, grinning. “And...?”

She bit her lip looked down at the display panel, remembering the way Rowan had looked at her, like she was amazing and perfect and special. “He said he - he said he loved me.”

“What?!” There was a thump as Ruby hopped off her elliptical. “Oh my god - Belle! That’s - that’s - oh my god!”

Ruby waved her arms, looking like she wanted to hug her friend, but Belle was still on the machine. “And did - did you?” she finally asked, clasping her hands together and holding them to her chest. “I mean, I assume you said it too?”

Belle sighed and stopped. “Well, uh, I didn’t at the time...” She shrugged and Ruby started to frown. “It wasn’t a big deal, I just - I wanted to be sure, you know? And I wasn’t, so I didn’t.”

“Okay...” Ruby replied, folding her arms and drawing out the ‘O’ sound. “How did that go over?”

She looked down at the display again, fiddling with the button for the heart rate monitor. There was a moment when she thought he would be upset, when she thought she’d have to say it in order not to lose him. But that was a dangerous road she’d been down before, and it had been nothing but heartbreak. They both deserved better.

“He, um, he was fine with it, actually. He was -” She looked up at Ruby and shook her head again. “I thought he’d be upset, but he wasn’t. At all. He knew I wanted to say it, that I wanted to feel it, and it was - it was okay.” She felt her frown melt.

“So, you guys are like - like really official then?” Ruby prodded.

“Yeah.” Belle looked at her again, beaming from ear-to-ear. “Yeah, we are. And I decided I do too. Love him, I mean.”

Ruby clapped her hands and squealed with delight, then reached out to give Belle a quick hug. “I guess you really are the Beauty that melted the Beast’s heart.”

Belle felt her face flush, and rolled her eyes as Ruby pulled away. “Shut up and get going,” she said, starting up her elliptical again. “I’m already a half mile ahead of you.”

Ruby groaned and got back on the elliptical machine, as Belle looked away and picked up the pace.

Gold sighed as he eased himself down on the bench. Behind him, David was adjusting the weight bars and fighting with the metal pin that held them in place.

“I swear that idiot Gaston bent this damn thing again,” David grumbled. The pin finally slid in and clicked, and he moved around to stand by Gold.

Gold huffed. “He also accidentally ripped the handle off of his bathroom door.” David cocked an eyebrow. “Or so says the message on my voicemail. Last month he kicked a hole in the drywall of his apartment doing some martial arts thing in his living room.”

“Yikes,” David muttered. “He really is like some useless evil henchmen from a Disney movie.”

“Indeed,” Gold chuckled, slipping his legs around the padded rollers at the end of the bench.

David bent to get something out of his bag, and Gold’s eyes drifted over to the mirrors and the racks of free weights, where Belle and Ruby were stretching. The two women bent in unison, touching their toes before raising up and lifting their arms up over their heads. Belle pushed up on her toes to stretch out her calves, and the rest of her amazing legs, then dropped down on her heels. She caught him looking as she turned to pick up her towel. He blushed, and she gave him a little wave.

He knew he had it bad, had for some time, but it only occurred to him in that moment in her apartment, gazing at her upside down, that he was in love with her. It was almost startling how clear his feelings were, and once they had become so present in his heart and mind, he couldn’t keep them in any longer. There was a small bit of disappointment that Belle hadn’t said back to him, but she had been so earnest in her response. He trusted in that, and believed that she cared for him deeply.

The rest would come in time.

Smiling to himself, he refocused on his workout, wincing a little as he lifted his legs and moved the weights. His injured leg was much better since he’d started coming to the gym regularly, but it always took a little bit extra to get going on those first reps. In a short while he’d finished the first set and stopped to rest, watching as Belle and Ruby picked up their stuff and started for the locker room.

She took the long way around, coming to the end of the row of machines and walking by in front of him and David. His mouth curved slightly as she came towards him. Her leggings and top were skin tight, the latter dipping lower than usual in the front, and it was all he could do to keep his eyes in his head as her hips swayed a little. She tossed a look over her shoulder after she passed, and winked. That told him all he needed to know. She’d done it on purpose to tease him, and he couldn’t help grin that cracked his face. He was a lucky bastard, completely and hopelessly in love.

Beside him, David cleared his throat, and Gold shifted to look at him.

“What?” he asked, frowning slightly.

“Nothing.” David smirked and shook his head. “Ready for another set?”

Gold nodded, throwing one last longing look at Belle just before she stepped into the locker room. He lifted the weight again, gripping the sides of the bench with his hands. His muscles were burning pleasantly, helping his mind relax. For a few minutes he let himself space out, staring straight ahead as he recalled Belle’s face smiling up at him.

“Things seem to be good with you and Belle,” David said, folding his arms as he came to stand by the weight bench.

He glanced up at David before his legs flexed and he lifted the weights again. “One could say that.” After a few more reps he stopped, a slow smile curving his lips. “Our, uh, last date was very...” He paused trying to think of what to say without telling the story about he blurted out his feelings. “It, uh - it went well, you might say.”

David gave him a crooked smile as the cables moved and the flywheels whirred. “Mary Margaret said she saw you two making out in front of the library.”

The weights slammed together abruptly.

“What?!” Gold exclaimed, twisting on the bench to look at David properly. His eyes were wide, his face a mix of embarrassment and shock. He could just imagine how they must have looked to Miss Blanchard, an old man and a pretty young woman sucking face in public. He winced at the mental image.

David leaned against the machine and grinned. “So it’s true?”

His head dropped into his hands momentarily, and he sighed heavily before he looked up again. “Yeah, we, uh, we might have gotten a bit carried away. Please give Mary Margaret my apologies.”

“Why?” David patted him on the shoulder, still smiling. “It’s not like she was offended. She thought it was very sweet, and she was quite happy to tell me how you two were completely unaware of the rest of the world.”

He pulled a face. “Still, it was unintended.”

“Relax,” David said, moving around to the back of the machine to adjust the weight again before switching the pins from working legs to arms and back. “So, that was your third date then, eh?”

Gold frowned as he reached up for the bar above his head. “Yes, why?”

“Oh, come on, Gold. I’m sure you’ve heard about the third date rule,” David said with a wink.

He recalled Neal talking once about how the third date was now “the sex date” or some ridiculous idea like that. Relationships shouldn’t be on a timetable, and he would never dream of pushing Belle into any intimacy she wasn’t ready for. Still, their kiss had been quite heated and if not for a fact of biology they might have...

Gold felt his face heat as Belle and Ruby came out of the locker room. He blew out a breath and reached for his cane before pushing to his feet. “Excuse me,” he said, hurrying away from David’s soft laughter.

Belle saw him as he approached, and her face went red. She grabbed at Ruby’s arm and they stopped just in front of him.

“Hey Gold,” Ruby said, grinning. Then she turned to Belle. “Don’t forget, Bells, condom and lube!”

Then she walked off, leaving Gold to gape at her in shock.

“Do I want to know what that was about?” he asked finally.

Belle shook her head and looked at the floor. “Just Ruby being Ruby.”

“Uh huh,” Gold mumbled, ducking his head to catch her eye until she looked up. “Well, um, I thought perhaps we should make plans.”

She started to smile, her lips pursing at first before the corners of her mouth curved. “For what?”

He shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant and failing. “Dinner,” he said, his lips twitching. “Say...Friday night again?”

She bit her lip and reached out, touching his hand where it rested on his cane with her fingertips. His hand moved and turned over, catching her fingers before she could pull away and sliding his palm against hers.

“Where?” she asked, stepping closer and letting her hand wrap around his. “Granny’s? Marco’s? Or that new place down towards -”

“Mine,” he said, looking up from their joined hands to meet her eyes. “My place, I mean. I’ll, um, I’ll make dinner. That way we, uh, we don’t have to go anywhere.”

Her eyes widened briefly and she licked her lips. There was an unsaid invitation there, and she felt her pulse skip in anticipation. “That sounds great.”

He smiled softly, his heart swelling with love every time she was near. It was the kind of hopeless, longing, aching love that he’d only felt once before, and it had broken his heart. There was a nasty little voice in the back of his mind that liked to taunt him now and then, preying on his deepest insecurities. He hadn’t heard it for some time, but there it was, telling him that this couldn’t last, that she couldn’t feel the same, that she was far too good for him.

“Is six too early?” he heard himself ask.

She shook her head, wagging her pony tail. “No, yeah, that’s - that’s good. Leaves plenty of time for - whatever.”

Gold nodded and swallowed as she inched closer. “Good.”

Belle pushed up on her toes and pressed her lips to his, firmly but briefly. He let out a small noise, and behind them David let out a teasing whoop. Gold threw a look over his shoulder, which made David laugh.

“Are we still on for lunch tomorrow?” she asked, letting go of his hand and hoisting her gym bag higher on her shoulder.

He stepped back a bit and folded his hands. “Of course. I’ll pick up takeout from Granny’s and meet you at the shop.”

She beamed at him and bounced on her toes. “See you then.”

He returned her smile and the nagging voice receded into the darkness once more as he turned to watch her go. She threw a little look over her shoulder at him, her bottom lip caught in her teeth, and gave him another little wave. She was entirely too good for him, but for once he wasn’t going to let his fears stop him.

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #belle x mr. gold #working out #fic #my rumbelle fic

46 notes · View notes

daynamartinez22 · 3 years

Text

Weekly SEO Q&A – Hump Day Hangouts – Episode 310

youtube

Click on the video above to watch Episode 310 of the Semantic Mastery Hump Day Hangouts.

Full timestamps with topics and times can be found at the link above.

The latest upcoming free SEO Q&A Hump Day Hangout can be found at http://semanticmastery.com/humpday.

Announcement

There’s a search console because that’s my go to I don’t care what anything else says. And right when I’m looking at everything, I had a form submission come in. So I got it, I got it, I got the screen capture because I had to blur out some stuff. So I’m going to be sharing that as soon as we’re ready to go.

And we are live Welcome everybody to Hump Day Hangouts, Episode 310. While Bradley’s doing some stuff in the background here, we’re gonna get going. I’m gonna say hi to the guys real quick. We got some quick announcements. And then I’m just scrolling through here. It looks like we’ve got a good number of questions. So with that said, Marco, I’m going to loop back to you, man, how you doing today? Like, by the way, like your shirt, you’re looking good.

I’m good, man. I’m sorry. I took it away from from my window. Should I have done that? I got I got I got a mess in the office right now. But you guys, you see? Nothing but like, Man, this is how I do to do I do. I can’t help it again. Come get some come get some guys. Just Just a quick word, stop relying on on third party vanity metrics for what’s going on on your website, according to Google. So you go to somebody else to see what’s going on in Google. I it for the life of me, I can’t figure that out. So in a minute, when we get to that question or five, whenever we get to it, I’m going to be sharing something on screen, just so you guys can see why you can’t go with third party vanity and domain authority then, whatever the hell it is you’re relying on. you’re relying on the wrong thing. And I’ll show you some and let’s see, I’ll get I thought it was muted. Sorry, Chris. How’s it going?

Doing good here? Good. They can complain and yeah, I think we got something pretty sweet coming. Oh, really? I made a video about something today, so, huh?

All right. Well, now I’m curious. I don’t even know what you’re talking about.

Well check Facebook.

Ah, all right. I will check it out. Bradley, you got the tech stuff done. Are you available?

Well, it’s the fucking video still not on know that on the page. Click Funnels bullshit. I’m tired of it. And I really am.

It’s still not even there we go. Yeah, it’s updated now.

Well, it’s not for me.

Gotcha. Well, we’ll circle back around. I’m going to type something in while I ask her not How you doing today, man?

Great, man. I’m in Miami. Having fun. Everything’s good.

Well, you got to talk for a little bit longer. I gotta, I gotta touch.

Okay. I’m in Miami. It’s raining. I’m having a lot of fun. This is awesome. And I’m waiting for Adam to stop typing so that he can keep on doing the intro. But did I mention that I mean, Miami? And

I’ve heard that you’re in Miami. Is that true?

No, I don’t know what you got that from? Yeah, man. How? how weak Are you really in the gym right now after all these months of no workouts? I’m a pussy. I’m doing like a D load quote-unquote, D load week right now. And I’m like, so sore. And I did like, two squats on Monday.

Those are right now, but we still had it. So.

Gotcha. All right. Well, I got a little note there. So if you’re watching us on YouTube, let us know. Also, if you’re somehow seeing this on the page, just shoot us a message let us know you can see it. But in the meantime, we’re gonna keep rolling and maybe figure something else out. But Bradley, how are you doing man? Besides page refreshes and caches?

Yeah, I’m just I’m tired of Click Funnels in their stupid fucking. There are always issues with Click Funnels, it seems to be getting worse. So anyway, maybe we can move the webinar on to a page on our site instead. I think we should probably do that. Because we won’t have to deal with this every week. It seems to be getting worse. So anyway, that said I, everybody.

Everything is fine. Yeah, that’s cool. Um, I’ve actually been testing out group funnels, maybe that’ll grab the lifetime account. And that came out, maybe we can just toss it on there and see if that works. Or just put it on the website, like you said, or do like a direct YouTube type of thing. love to see. But anyway, with that said, we have a couple of announcements. First of all, if you’re on the email list, that’s great. You’ve gotten the announcements about the POFU Live recordings, you got access to the little special offer we had to go in there. But if you’ve missed out on that, first of all, go to semantic mastery or go to Hump Day Hangouts. Just Google that and go to our page, enter your email address, so you can get notified about stuff like this. We do give special deals, special offers, and some bonuses to subscribers, but I’m also going to put it on the page here today. The recordings are available. Along with the recordings, you have the option to get executive summaries we’ve gone through and we’ve taken and distilled every single talk that we had into a quick basically reference guides. So you’ve got links, you’ve got the main points, so you can go back or have that open as you’re watching the talk. Super, super handy. So that will be on the page in just a minute. Oh, man, I am just losing my place like crazy today. I’ve got a couple more announcements. And while I hunt these down, did you guys have anything we need to also cover? Before we dive into things?

What about POFU?

About It was a great event.

Oh my god, what about it?

The live of the recordings are available, right?

Should be right.

Yes, that what I was just talking about or not my losing my mind about POFU.

I don’t know, but well I’m gonna keep running on because I don’t know where we’re going and this is gonna get pretty weird for people watching. So anyway, I do want to talk about one other thing, if you go to the SEOshield.com, the SEOshield.com that’s a great place. If you’re new to Semantic Mastery and MGYB You can find out how to shield your site and never worry about algorithm updates. Again, it’s a free training, just head over to the SEOshield.com and grab that if you’re more on the agency owner kind of consultant side and you want to get more clients to grow your revenue scale your team, head over to 2xyouragency.com. And last but not least, if you’re ready to grow your digital marketing business, your agency then you can join our experienced community. With the mastermind You can find out more about that at mastermind dot semantic mastery.com I like to go through these every time because we don’t know you know, we have new people watching every week. And those are some pretty typical questions we get from people, you know, hey, I’m just starting to watch you guys where the hell do I start? Right? Good question. So finding out about the SEO shield is great. Then we got people are saying hey, I either want to start or kind of grow my agency, I’m not sure what to do that’s to x your agency COMM And then we’ve got people, of course, are like, Hey, I’m in it, I want to grow, I want to be around other people like me who have got their agencies going who’ve got their businesses going. And that’s where the mastermind comes in. So those are the big ones. Of course, we mentioned MGYB, if you’re not familiar with that it’s mgyb.co, save time and money with done for you services. This is all stuff that we’ve used, and either converted into a done for you process or stuff that we had done for us. And now we’re offering it as well. So you can get it done for you and save time. So this is a great place to be like white labeling, things like press releases link building the SEO shield, for example. Lots more over there, too, and lots more coming. So with that said, guys, that’s it for the quick announcement. Anything else we want to cover before we dive into questions? I’m waiting around to say something No, just kidding. Wait, good. All right, let’s do it is that we got a bunch of questions already. So let me get the page pulled up here. And I’ll grab the screen.

This has got me all screwed up. Because the format has changed in the last couple of weeks. And after years of having one particular startup format. It’s hard to hard to transition.

All right,

you guys are seeing my screen now. Correct. Good to go. Yes.

Yep. All right.

What Is The Name Of The Upcoming Buffer Site S3 Creator?

Let me expand this a little bit. There we go. So the first question up says, Hi, you mentioned something about an upcoming buffer site s3 creator from ABS right? Yeah. Abbess. Rathje. As I think I’m saying his name correctly, I always feel like I’m mispronouncing that. Or he says, Can you please give us some URL or spell the product or the name as I can’t find anything? Yes, buffersites.com. It’s not available yet. But I believe it says coming soon. And I think he’s working on something because I recently got an email from him about kind of a technology that he created for that works with Amazon s3, hosted web pages, as well as some other type of web 2.0 sites and things like that. So I think buffersites.com is in the pipeline, but it’s not available yet. So that’s what it is buffersites.com and the developer’s name is Abbess Abbess. ABB BB as Rathje. And I think I always butcher his name when I try to say it. But he’s, he’s got many different types of software products out there that are fairly good. Some of them are but got a little bit of a learning curve, but he’s got like video marketing Blitz was one of them, it was a good product that we use for quite some time. So he’s got several different kinds of products out that you know, software programs that do things so that’s the one I was talking about.

Should You Make A Separate Page For Each Location When Siloing A Local Service Business Site?

Next question is Tommy says when creating location pages for a local service business, would you make a location page for the location the business is located in the business already has the primary location in the footer about, etc, and ranks on page two for keywords in the primary location on a general service page? Would it be overkill to create a location for it to and be duplicate content would appreciate your advice? Thanks. Now, if it’s a single location site, you don’t need to you don’t need a location page for it. The only time that I would recommend having location pages is if you have if it’s a multi-location business right? Because then you can, you’d have one location is typically going to be like a headquarters, right? Like the main location or, you know, the primary location, the first location, whatever you want to call it. And so that would be like what I would, you know, a lot of So for example, if I were to build a lead gen site that was optimized for one location, but then I decided, because let’s say it was really successful, and I decided to start expanding locations for that brand, then what I would do is I would make that, you know, the primary location would be the first location, and I would take that as kind of like the name, address and phone number for the primary location would be like the organization, you know, essentially, the main location for that multi-location business, and then I would create separate location pages for each individual, or additional location, I should say, that’s how I would do it. But yeah, I wouldn’t recommend creating a location page on a site that is optimized for one location. Because you’re it that that’s kind of, you know, Department of redundancy department, you know what I mean? So I would recommend that you don’t do that, you don’t need to do that. But what you can do is you can split out like suburbs, or, you know, I’m not, I’m not sure what how you’ve got your site structured, but you can create geo posts, that’s what I call it, but they’re locally optimized posts for localities within your service area, if it’s a service area business, I’m just assuming that it is. But it could be a storefront business, in which case, you wouldn’t even really need to do that either. But for service area businesses, like contractors, which is what I do, then what I would do is have the one location, you know, is probably the only location but then I would start optimizing content in what’s called geo posts, or what I call geo posts, which would be optimizing content for like the suburbs, the adjacent areas, that and then I would, you know, kind of optimize cut, my blogger does all this, but she’ll go out and pull in like points of interest, historical, you know, references, things like that, that are relevant to each individual, you know, suburb or municipality or whatever that I’m trying to expand into, and then show, you know, produce some content, you know, included about whatever products or services the company offers. And you can start to blog that way, so that you can start really kind of expanding your service area footprint, so to speak. But you don’t need to have a separate location page for the location. If it’s a one-location business, it just doesn’t make sense to do that, in my opinion. Any other input on that guy just said, there’s no such thing as a duplicate content.

And we see this all the time, no such thing as that happening. Now, as far as would it be overkill? to us that perfectly? The advice is that when looking at content is whether you’ve given the content, proper attribution. That’s all that matters. Because if you haven’t, then let’s say if your G site is really strong, it might outrank your money site. That’s the only problem you’re going to run into. But if you have proper attribution, if if Google understands where the master copy of the content resides, and there is no problem, there are only problems if you’re running like duplicate titles, duplicate descriptions, and things like that. But we’ve literally only changed location on content and run the same, like 15,000. More than that pages have the same content except for the location and it works. It’s working. Right now. I’m about to show you how it’s working right now. And when we get to that question, there is no such thing as duplicate content, you got the master copy. And then you have copies of that content. proper attribution takes care of any duplicate content issues, and so does canonical. If you canonicalize. correctly, you’re fine. You’re good to go.

There you go. Let me unpause the screen for a minute if I can find it. Okay.

What Do You Recommend For A Self-Hosted URL Shortener?

So the next question is from Jr. My guess, says, Hey, guys, do you have any well-recommended URL shortener? Excuse me? Do you have any good recommendations for a self-hosted URL shortener looking to set up one for a client to be public-facing so users can create short links easily from their website? Open to using a hosted solution if it exists? Thanks. Also, is there any SEO value for the target site if users create short links? So, Marco, you would be the one to answer that because we set that up for MGYB.

Yeah, I mean, yeah, there eventually will be SEO value once you power it up. However, how long is it going to take you to power up that URL shortener on that website that has no power to start with? Which is what you need, which is the reason why Well, the reason why just say use a shortener To make the URL easier to handle, right, when you’re sharing it, you don’t want this long 50 character URL, you want something short and memorable. That’s why Bitly for a while was so good. And then we started realizing the SEO value in Bitly, until they decided that they were going to 302. At well, then we went to the Google goog l URL shortener until they took it away. So we decided rather than rely on others, why not create our own power that up, give everybody the SEO value and the added benefit that you could go in, and I think it’s only for like five or six, I don’t know, seven bucks a month, I don’t even know. Use your own use of our shortener which is powered up. And then you could have your own URLs, right, you can have your own URL extensions, you could have your own. If you want to call them vanity, whatever you want to call them. They’re yours, but they reside in MGYB. And they continue to get powered up by dedhia. So I will be there’s the SEO benefit, the SEO benefit that you get is the power that’s behind that. But right from the start when you go and install that whether you do it on a subdomain on your client site, whether you use pretty links, whatever it is that you’re going to use is not going to have any SEO value until you power it up.

All right, there we go on the resume share again.

Because doing some background stuff. Alright.

Can You Make Multiple GStacks On One Google Account That Are Interconnected?

So the next question would be Hey, guys, the question on G stacks. Can I make multiple G stacks on one g account that are not interconnected? Uh, yeah, I suppose you could. Now I’m not sure why you would want to we separate them. But you know, Marco, now that we’re not using the script. There’s not a limitation on that, though. Is there?

Let me see, of course, there is.

Why would you want to go and break up the well, not a limitation? But why would you want to put two things that are unrelated in the same dry stack?

We go for G stacks under one account. So different g stacks, but yes,

no? No. Okay.

Oh, unless they’re totally relevant if I mean, if you can, if all right, same niche, yes, it makes sense. If you’re going to break up the niche, if it’s going to be totally unrelated, then No, they’re not because now you’re putting all your eggs. First of all, you’re putting all your eggs in one basket, right? Everything is in a Google takes that away, you’re gonna lose everything that’s in there. That’s why we turn over we create our own Gmail accounts. And we turn them over to you so that you can use it. And if you order 1000 from it, you’re gonna have 1000 Gmail accounts, but you can manage a whole lot of them from one account, which is what we recommend, you can are we send a letter, we send an email when we deliver the drive stack, and we tell you what to do with it, make your main account the manager of that account, so you never again have to go back into that account. But this way, you won’t take any chances in eliminating the public-facing dry stack and decide you’re not going to run any into any problems or getting locked up or anything like that. Right. And then we tell you to change the phone number, change the recovery, make sure that you can get in there eventually. But only if you have to only have you must, once we turn it over, there is absolutely no reason for you to go back in there. Unless you want to go in there and Tinker and then you’re on your own. So please understand what it is that we’re doing. And what it is that we recommend for you putting like 50 I don’t know you could you get 15 What is it 15 gigabytes in that drive stack, excuse me in Google Drive to play with. So there’s plenty of space in there for you to get multiples in. But you’re putting everything in one basket you’d be put you putting all your eggs in there, and you drop that fucking basket and all your eggs break, you better know how to make scrambled eggs.

Yeah, I agree with that limit, you know, mitigate your risk that way. And so you know, as Marco said, we deliver it with its own Gmail account. And that’s you know, the primary owner of the drive stack which you can always add you know, your main Gmail account or G Suite account, whatever as a manager or share it with that so you can still manage the stack from within your own account, but it’s owned by the other account that way you’re limiting your risk like Marco said, if that you had one account that had all of your G stacks in it and then something happened in it got suspended or terminated, then you’d be screwed. So I totally agree with what he says there.

Is It Better To Have An Old Google Account Better Than A Gsuite Account When Creating Drive Stacks?

Okay, the next question was which is better and old g account or a new G Suite account? Well, I’m always gonna say G Suite account because you’re paying Google that way and I use G Suite for freaking everything now. So if it’s a brand or a project that I know I’m going to be working on for any amount of time Other than just for testing purposes, I always set up G Suite accounts for everything. Now, that’s just my own personal preference. One thing you can do is if you have old Gmail accounts, you can set up a G Suite account through the old Gmail account. And that, I don’t know if that actually adds any additional benefit or not. But I can’t imagine it wouldn’t. You know, I can’t imagine that hurts anything. And so like, if you’ve got some old Jeep, like, for example, I have a Gmail account that I’d set up for Tree Service stuff way back in, I think, 2012, that I just recently decided to turn that into a brand and I created a G Suite account with that. Email is like the, you know, the, when you set up a G Suite account, you need to have an email account anyways, and all that, you know, to add to the system, so I use that one. And I think and again, I don’t know this without testing, but it makes sense that it would have some inherent authority built-in because it was an age, an old account, something that I had set up in 2012, that I just now turned into a G Suite account. Now again, I don’t know that that’s true. But it makes sense to do. So do you have any input on that as part of the entity validation, isn’t it? I wrote that when I wrote the black book, I mean, we’ve been recommending go G Suite, go pay Google, or pay Google for extra drive space, get that credit card, on file, get your stuff in the database. So now you’re a real thing on the web. Rather than someone trying to gain Google, you’re still trying to gain Google, but you’re going the extra step, which most people won’t do. And you go pay for ads, ads for branding, Brandy put out a great course, ads, I run ads, for branding purposes. So again, you’re going a step further validating your entity. This is all talked about how old is the black book about four years old? It’s all in there. I don’t know, you guys, it’s all available to you. I think we also send it with that email with that recommendation email. For us, excuse me, the user’s guide, done for your users’ guide is what we send out. And it’s all in there how to add validation to your entity pay Google, get your credit card, and Google, they’ll tell you that it doesn’t have any effect in rankings. And they the way that they’re saying it is right, I would say okay, that in and of itself doesn’t. But when you’re validating the entity, that part of it has a big, big play in what the end results are going to be.

Unknown Speaker 22:33 Absolutely. All right. So next is Oh, by the way, a couple of things I wanted to briefly mention I was distracted from the start-up for the webinar being rough again. But a couple of things. One, I want to talk about this, this great post in our free group Facebook group from Max Lucey fam bam, we had we did a webinar on Monday with Mike Martin for Lead Simplify if you guys haven’t seen it yet, I would highly recommend that you check it out. I know most of our audiences into local SEO, local client work or lead generation. And it’s a fantastic application. It’s very inexpensive, and it works really, really well. The lead simplifies the app, I use it in my own business. In fact, I started using it eight or 10 weeks ago, probably closer to 10 weeks ago now. And I reached out to the developer Mike Martin, specifically after I had set the app up and integrated it into my own lead gen business. Because I saw the value of it, I decided to reach out to Mike and the developer and asked him if we could promote it to our audience specifically, because, guys, you know, we don’t promote other people’s stuff ever. Unless we, ourselves, you know, or somebody in our, my partners or one of us in my company use something and can vouch for it. And so we rarely promote other people’s stuff. And in this case, I reached out specifically to try to ask if we could promote it because I think it is such a valuable app. And so the webinar was great. We had some technical difficulties at the beginning of that part of the reason why I was frustrated this today for Hump Day Hangouts, but I got that cleaned up. So now the replay is just the content. And it’s really good content about what he calls the hybrid lead generation model. It’s fantastic content, as well as the app itself, is very inexpensive and very useful. And I use it in my business now. So we also throw in a couple of bonuses that I use specifically for generating lead buyers. So basically prospecting for lead buyers. And it works really, really well. I’ve been bringing multiple new lead buyers into my business over the last several weeks because of this app, as well as the prospecting systems that I have built, which I share all of that in our bonuses, so I would highly recommend that you guys go check out the lead simplify webinar that we did with Mike on Monday, and check it out.

Also, I just wanted to give a shout out to max Lu See fam bam, for this great post that they posted about watching that webinar and becoming inspired, because of some, you know, basically having some issues with clients, client work can be very frustrating guys in I’ve said that over the years, there’s certainly ups and downs with client work. But I really have decided that you know, I don’t want to work with any more take on any new clients, I just want to work on building my lead gen business and for several of the reasons that were mentioned in this post here, as well. So just wanted to kind of point that out, give a shout out to Max, Max Luci for posting such a thoughtful and thorough posting here. And, you know, we’re excited to see you, we’re excited to see you excited, and I think you’re on the right track, build your own assets instead of others. Now don’t get me wrong, guys, if you got to do client work, to make money do it, you know, but at the same time, instead of always building other people’s businesses budget some time and some money to start building your own assets to so that you can be gain more control over your revenue, right and your future. Clients can fire you at any moment, right? They can stop paying you to go find the bargain basement $99 a month SEO from you know, India or wherever and fire you in a heartbeat. And what are you going to do? You know, one of the things in our mastermind is we’ve had people that have come in that have had, you know, perhaps one or two clients that provide 90% of their income. Like for example, like a 4000 or $5,000 a month retainer client, what happens if that client drops you and your, your, your 90% of your revenue is based upon that one client, does that make sense or just a couple of clients and then you lose one of them. And now you’ve cut your revenue in half or a third or whatever my point is, you know, start thinking of ways to generate your own assets so that you have more control over your, your revenue and your future. And, and so again, I’ve got clients now, and I’ve still got a handful, I just took a client on about seven, six or seven weeks ago now a new client, but I don’t think I want to take on any more clients unless they’re going to give me you know, a much higher retainer value than what I typically asked for, because I really just want to focus on building my own business. So I thought this was a really thoughtful post and I just wanted to give a shout out to there and also encourage you guys to go check out the replay.

How Do We Use of Text Transcripts From Videos For Traffic And Link Building Purposes?

Alright, any comments on that before I move on guys? Nah, perfect. Okay, Franklin says, Hey, guys, given the rise of video integration in SERPs, and Google taking snippets of sentences, and focusing more on YouTube and looking to get a syndication ring and look into backlinking for videos, is there anything we can do with text transcripts from our videos for traffic, and link building purposes. Um, you know, the only thing that I, I don’t, what I’ve done in the past that works fairly well, like with client work, especially is I’ve had, I’ve trained some of them. Like, for example, I’ve got an outdoor pest control company that does like mosquito control, take control, that kind of stuff. It’s a very seasonal business. But I trained their technicians to, like I told the company owners to tell their technicians to just when they go out on job sites, which are just people’s yards, essentially, to just take their phone out and grab, record a short video, like literally like, Hey, this is John, for a company name, I’m out in, you know, Fairfax, Virginia, providing mosquito control services. And, you know, if you want your yard to be tick free ticket, mosquito, free, contact us, and then drop a phone number, whatever. So very, very short little video clips that then they send to me, I upload them to YouTube, optimize them, and then have that transcribed, which is, you know, literally, it’s usually about a minute long the video or less, so cost a buck or a buck 50 to have it transcribed, and then embed that into a blog post with the transcription underneath. And that syndicates out to the branded network that’s attached to the, to the website, as well as the YouTube channel can be attached to that too. So both can be syndicated to it, that’s what I’ve done. And it just it that tends to work because it adds some text without having to have you know, it’s, it’s all done with just a video, right? a short video can be turned into a video plus a blog post with the text with the transcription, the call to action, everything that you need for additional content, you know, to multi-purpose the content. So that’s what I’ve done. Maybe somebody else here has some other suggestions for how to use text. But that’s pretty much the extent of what I’ve done. And that works quite well actually.

Anybody else? Yeah, I mean, what you could do lots with the transcript, right? You can add it to your page and it becomes part of the blog post when you embed the video on your website. The transcript can actually become the content on your pay. I mean, we recommend that this time and again right then you syndicate it, then when you do your embed, right With the video, you could do the page I mean, not just the video, you can do an embed run of that page. Right? Because then that it’s an iframe, and that’s perfectly fine. You want you’re not going to run into any duplicate content issues. But people are still going to say, Okay, yeah, there are problems there are. So that’s another thing that you could take the audio from that video and start going to the audio distribution, I’d SoundCloud would be one podcast, and then you can create a syndication network for that. And there are so many different things that you could do with that, to get tons of value, rather than just think, Okay, what I do with this transcript, you could also convert it into a PDF, a downloadable PDF on your website. Right? That content, so I framed the video. And rather than just put the text on there as content, you could put additional content on it, then a link to a PDF that people can download, then you go and submit that to all these PDF directories that you have all over the web. And, I mean, that’s, that’s another thing that you can do, really, you’re only limited by, by, you know, your imagination. And what you can come up with the limit is the things that you can think of to do with this content. Not that you have multiples, but you have video, you have audio, and you have text, and then that text can become a PDF, it can become any other kind of download, it can become an image, the text itself can become an image, you can do the question and answer images of each. I mean, it becomes what you could do becomes ridiculous. The thing is, is it necessary? And why are you needing to do all of this a lot of times, all of that just simply isn’t necessary because the process that we use, requires you to do as little work as you can for as much benefit as you can saving the bullets. In case you need more.

There you go. Always keep some, some in reserve, right.

How Do You Properly Optimize The GMB And Website Of An Old Business?

Okay. The next question is a basic GMB question. I have a client who bought his dental practice from another dentist. The old dentist GMB is ranking Okay, three in some map packs around the office. And second, organically what is the best approach try to merge in the GMB market is closed and rank the new one with the new business name for the web for a website, the old one as a pop up directing to the new site, should I take that site down or leave it up just worried about the possum, but I think I could rank them both, I would be fine with that both businesses have exact same address. Okay, I’m going to give you what I would do in that situation. And then I’d love to hear Marco’s opinion on this as well. But what I would do is I would merge those two GM B’s the one that was shut down, I would contact Google My Business support and explain exactly what you just did to us without the SEO terminology, because you want to act dumb, or even, you know, you can act on behalf of the business owner. But I’ve done that in the past something similar where you know, there’s two GM B’s because of a tree service company bought another tree service company, for example. And so since they ended up sharing the same address, but it was different names and everything else, I don’t want to cause any PII issues, right where you can ambiguous ate the data for a particular business. So what I do is I contact Google My Business support and tell them, hey, this company bought this company there now. And you know, it’s now this name, but it’s in the same location, I want to merge the two and Google support Google, my business support will help you with that. I’ve had I’ve done that on multiple occasions. So that’s personally what I would do as far as the website. What I would do with the website is do a redirect. Right? If it’s ranking second, organically, I think you said yeah, second, organically, the website is got some authority, obviously. So if you’ve got the new website for the new brand, what I would do is do a redirect, I wouldn’t leave both of them up because it could cause some excuse me some NAEP issues and possibly some entity ambiguation. So I would like I said I would merge the two GM B’s you might have to contact you will likely have to contact GMB support to do that so that it can be done properly. For example, you know if you have I had another client that had a GMB where they had to they moved all they did was move locations so when they moved locations, they set up a new GMB instead of changing the original, like the information in the original GMB, they just set up a new one. And so when they came to me as when I, you know, brought them on as a client, they had a bunch of reviews for their old location, but they had their new location that had you know, just a hand a couple of reviews but they wanted to merge the two and so once again, I contacted GMB support and I had them merge the two. So they basically called and removed the old GMB from the old location, but merged all of the reviews into the new one under the new location. And so you can do those kinds of things as long as it’s 100%. legit, if it’s spam stuff, don’t even attempt it. But if it’s 100%, legit, then I would absolutely contact GMB support have the two merged. And then again, for the organic site, I would have that redirected to the new site so that you can push that authority over to the new site. Now that’s my method. Would anybody have a different opinion? merge and properly three? Oh, and I totally agree, is a having tool and maybe creating. Now, this is where duplicate matters, right? And, and the entity comes into play, and you create ambiguity, and then Google doesn’t Okay, so which dentist is which? And how does this all work? Because it’s a bot and it’s stupid. And if you don’t give it the information is not going to know. And you want to try to relate them to one to the other, and why what’s changed and all that you’re going to get into a whole lot of issues that you don’t want. Bradley told you exactly how to solve it, merge the GMB’s call and act really stupid with the owner as a matter lead to let the dentist’s quiet Look, I bought those dentists out and now he’s got a GMB and I got I let them work it out. And then you could properly 301 the old site to the new and gain from all that power that the old one has. And as a matter of fact, if you properly three or one, you could hammer the old website for a while and get the benefit into the new website.

Or you go so the next question. I’m not sure if well, I guess there is a question in there. It says guys, I’m looking both at land solutions and alpha land realty not typing these names for a reason. I don’t care. I know. I honestly don’t care that I’ve never tried to hide my homeland realty business. They’re public. Yeah, they’re public. I’ve always mentioned that and he said, anyway, I’ll finish the question then I’m going to comment and I’m sure Marco has some comments as well says I don’t see any good rankings there. In fact, I see a huge decline. I see a huge decline in something that was not very impressive anyway. Well, that’s okay. Because that not very impressive, impressive Alfa land realty site makes me between three and $15,000 a month and fucking month and has for a year and a half. So that’s not very impressive. They’re not you know, I’m sorry, I don’t know how to impress you. It works just fine for me. He says I know you do local use GM B’s ads, etc. You said, you said and you said it many times. It’s about calls and leads I get it but it looks more narrowed towards local map listing rather than a national campaign or global campaign. Mine is not a national or global campaign Alfa land realty is a Virginia based real estate acquisition company. All I target is Virginia. That’s all I’ve ever targeted since I set it up. And I use Google ads, direct mail and SEO, and I get all the damn leads that I want or can handle from those three methods. So and most of my traffic comes from direct mail I’m not gonna lie I do get leads from Google ads and from organic SEO, but those leads aren’t really the leads that I want. Those are typically not as good leads because I like to target specific land types in certain areas. And so with direct mail, I can do that. And so again, I’ve always I’ve never tried to hide the fact that I’ve not done a whole ton of SEO for Alfa land realty because I haven’t needed to most of the traffic that I generate is through direct mail. However, I do get probably eight to 12 leads per month from Google ads and or organic SEO but those they tend I bought several properties from you know, leads that have come in from either Google ads or from organic SEO, but most of them that come through aren’t those good they’re not that good leads because they’re not as targeted as I want them to be like I can do with direct mail. So again, I’ve never tried to hide that guys there’s no reason for me to I’m always honest with what’s going on in my business and it’s all been about Virginia land by land acquisitions in Virginia so I’ve been able to accomplish my goals with the methods that I’m using that solutions go ahead.

On the other hand is national and as a matter of fact we got we had a lead once from Bali so it’s it’s global. We did lead from somebody was selling land in Bali wanted us to do one to see if we would buy it I and I’ve prepared some some stuff that I that I want to share my skis Mind if I grabbed the screen shirt. Let me go here. And I can’t you got to give me permission or stop sharing your stop sharing mine. How about that? And I was Okay, here we go. Let me make sure I share the right one. Get rid of the porn. All right. So I saw this question and I came a look. Because I love the use of the turn of the phrase, I see a huge decline of something that was not very impressive anyway, wasn’t meant to be impressive was meant to get results. I’m not to impress anyone. I’ve never, I’ve never been it, I don’t want to impress you. All I want is the person here. If you can see my screen, when they come on here to fill out the fucking form. That’s all I want. Not to impress. So here we go. Are we seeing that position? I took a look. I don’t know how many top 10s I have. I but if I can scroll down? I don’t know. I can keep scrolling. Scrolling. Scrolling. Right. So you can see yes, it’s very local. It’s heavily local. How else would you target local real estate? Please, what are we talking about? Can we please define what we’re talking about first, because yes, even though this is National in nature, I have to target it locally. Or else, the person that’s looking to sell their land, in bumfuck, whatever, would never find me to sell me the land. So of course, I don’t know what it is you’re using you said hrs, I don’t use hrs. I don’t use sem rush, I don’t use any action. I use go, this is what I use. This is what tells me what it is that I’m doing. And whether what I’m doing works. Not only this, but while I was doing this, what’s so funny is let me pull this up in my G but look at the time 1:37pm I haven’t even opened because I was going through this, to show this during have to have a web web form fill came through. This is what I’m after man. Now, not you, you why user specific or targeted or whatever. But this is what I’m after I’m not after you. And I’m not after a dress to impress a dress and whatever the fuck it is they decide to give because I could give a shit about a trust and majestic. And and whoever else, you name it, I don’t care. I get my information from analytics, I get my information from the Search Console. That’s what tells me what to target. So I can get this because as Bradley said, Now these, what I do is I’ve been turning them over to the alpha land Realty, that you created Bradley. Yeah, the group, I’m sure you see me posting in there. And this is what I’ll do with this form. Because I have enough with what I’m doing with what I’m targeting in the states that I’m targeting. Or I’m good where I don’t know, four or five sales.

I wouldn’t say that much, let’s say three to four sales per month, three to four k average, well, that’s an extra 10 k in my pocket that I’m not expecting to see. I mean, and this is after expensives after expenses, after cost lawyers and everything else, it’s in my pocket is what I put in my pocket. That feels really nice. I don’t know about you, it may not be impressive to you. And I understand that. Okay, you may you probably make way more than I do, from something that just a side hustle, and a website that we haven’t done really anything to other than you know, we set up the SEO shield, some schema, some q&a, but not really giving it the love that it should not giving it all of the attention that we need to. Because since this is my main source of income, since this is just a playground, whatever I get here is perfect. I mean, this is fine for me, if I get I don’t know, 10 of these is what we’re getting per month, and I turn them over to the guys and and they can close a few. And they give me the commission. I mean that that’s an extra source of income in my pocket. So in addition to whatever it is that I’m closing and that I’m making every month, now this, this last solution network will also produce webform fills, where the guys who took Bradley’s training can go and they can get after these people make the offer and try to make that close and sell and put a couple of grand in their pocket. And they really didn’t have to do the effort other than to contact and try to close it. Because this person is hot. This person is hot to sell. They don’t go and find you organically unless they’re hard to sell this we know. So I’m sorry that you’re not impressed. But yeah, I mean, the other part of this what you said is so like calls and leads, because that’s the only way that you gonna make money. And I could be number one in everything and not making a penny and I could be selling it hot. Look, look, I’m number one. Number one. Number one, I’m not making a penny. And yet you’re going to fall for it. Because you see number one everywhere and is not really doing anything. So I mean, hopefully, this is the example you should be focusing on. We put everything through Google through analytics, and through search console. That’s what that personally, this is what I focus on. I don’t care about anything else. And I don’t care what anybody says about analytics and search console, because they’re generally wrong and they don’t know how to use it. And so they can’t see how it works. that’s their problem, not mine. All right, my hand a second, let me just finish my mastermind, people, my heavy hitter club and my mini mastermind. They know how to use this shit, because I’ve shown them how to use it. And how it is that you’re supposed to take a look at analytics and search console so that you can get the most benefit from it. And I’m done. Go ahead, man.

Yeah, no, I was just mentioning that, again. You know, I, I spent last year I’ve been running my alpha land realty business for about a year and a half now. And it’s, it only requires about eight to 10 hours a week now, because I’ve got personnel in place, and automations and systems and everything that I built took me months to build all of it. But now it just requires very little of my attention. Like I said, between eight to 10 hours a week on average. And for a period of time, I did spend more time on SEO and a lot of time in Google ads. But I’ve refined the Google Ads campaigns. And I realized, after starting to receive leads from just SEO and from Google ads, that those aren’t the best quality leads, because they’re often in random areas of the state that I’m not interested in, which ends up taking more time to research those markets to get to know those markets. I know which markets, I can flip properties in very quickly. And so those are the markets that I target and I target them more specifically with direct mail, because it’s a higher quality lead, and it works better for my business model. So again, it’s not I’ve never tried to, you know, sell people on the fact that my alpha land realty site was super optimized and all that shit. And everyone, it’s a single page landing page on Click Funnels, but still ranks. So what difference does it make, it generates me a very nice income with very little effort now, because I’ve built the systems and everything else. So anyways, if anybody’s interested in learning more about that specifically, reach out to support at Semantic Mastery, we’ve had a couple of people reach out in the last month or so and say that they’re interested in possibly joining a paid training group where you where I’ll teach how to flip land, it’s a great business guys, you can do it virtually from a computer at home, like out of I think I flipped. I don’t know, 28, maybe between 20 and 32 properties in the last year and a half. And I’ve only been to three of them. And it was only for very specific reasons that I went to three of them, I’ve been able to buy and sell land and make, like I said, on average, on my low end, in fact, this month, I only make 2300. But on my on my low months, it’s still a four figure profit. And on my good months, I’ve made five never made more than 16,000 in a month. But you know, that’s a really good income now for three to or excuse me for eight to 10 hours a week of effort. And so again, if anybody’s interested in that business, just reach out and say you’re interested in land flipping business. And once we get enough interest, I’ll put together another group and do some training on that it will be a paid training though, guys, so just keep that in mind. All right, we’ve got about 12 more minutes. I’m gonna grab the question. Question, though.

It was a good question. And we’re weren’t attacking you for your vote on another way. No, no. And and it’s good. I love this when people call you out. And it’s okay, so well, because the proof of a profit is and whether the prophecy comes true. If it doesn’t, then the profit is useless, right? So what we say is the results are what matter we need to be able to show results so that people who are in a dress and doubting I understand the doubt man, I understand the doubt. What I’m saying is your focus is wrong. I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m saying the focus that you’re giving it is wrong, because we’re not interested in HS. And they can show whatever they want. And you could go ahead and share. It’s the land some land solutions network, you can share it, you can go look at it, reverse engineer it, because we did a lot of nasty stuff in there a lot of testing, and it’s still it’s ongoing. We’ll get back to it and give it some love man, because we can take over a lot of stuff with the way that it’s ranking right now. At any rate, yeah, it’s not anything done to you or set to you specifically. It’s just that when you when you focus on Ah, they’re going to show you what they want majestic what they want SEMrush what they want. I only care about Google. That’s all I care about.

Yeah, and just one other thing about that is what’s interesting is if you take a look at my site, somebody’s got positions here. Oh, look at that son of a bitch anyways. But you can see like sell land fast, Virginia. We buy land Virginia, there’s a few other keywords that work really well for ranking. But if you take a look at my site, guys, it’s a single page landing page on clickfunnels, which clickfunnels doesn’t even give you the ability to optimize the page much there. You can’t really optimize the elements and Click Funnels. It’s very difficult. But that’s it. I mean, it’s a very simple site on a wide Firefox has been so slow, but that’s it. It’s that I mean, there’s no content marketing going on there. I’ve had a syndication network built but I never I don’t I don’t blog. I don’t publish posts. I don’t have I’m not doing GMB posts or anything like that. I do a few a handful of press releases per year. And that’s it. And that’s all I’ve had to do because look, I’m ranking number one in Virginia for my primary keywords the keywords from because I’ve run Google ads for this for a year and a half, I know which keywords produce conversions generate leads, those are the only keywords I give a shit about all the other ones I could care less about. It’s not a it’s not a it’s not a you know, a test to see how how many rankings I can get. In this case, it’s producing like I said, on the low end, four figures and on the high end five figures per month consistently month in and month out. And it has been for a year and a half. So I’d say it’s a success. And I don’t spend a lot of time on it anymore. I did four months but it’s it’s where it is now to where it’s on. It’s almost on autopilot requires very little my attention. So

I’m not sure what why am why Oh, niches What does that mean? Do you know what y m y l means?

Marco? You’re You’re muted

by the way.

What is okay?

Nevermind.

I’m sorry. Somebody want to answer that?

Now? I thought I thought it was something else. MF

Global campaign for y m y l niches? I’m not sure what that means. Okay. Um, are these methods suitable for current moments for something outside at the current moment? Excuse me for something outside local marketing? Yeah, of course. I mean, again, like if you I mean, Mark always talks about local is relative, right? Your local can be a neighborhood, a city, a county, a state, a country, or global, it really just depends you local is relative, you know, there, I’m just targeting on a statewide basis, because I found that it doesn’t make sense to target like, we buy land Culpepper, Virginia, we buy land, it doesn’t make sense to go through all of that additional effort for that particular project. Because again, like and here’s the other thing about that project. And tree services, people will go to Google because they got a tree that is overgrown or a dead tree that’s in danger of falling on their house or their car or something. So they need that service. So they go to Google, and they search tree service or tree removal, Tree Removal near me or tree removal and whatever their city is, right. But with the landowners and for again, for that business, it’s a lot of times these are people that own land that really doesn’t haven’t even considered selling it, they just pay taxes on it, you know, year in and year out. And so I all of a sudden send them a letter that says, hey, I’m interested in purchasing your vacant land parcel located at whatever, whatever. If you’re interested in receiving an all-cash offer, fill out this form at this website, or call this number, which goes to my call center. That’s it. And so again, you know, a lot of the times I’m targeting people that have land that doesn’t even know that they want to sell it, the ones that do think, well, I’ve got a piece of land I need to generate some money from there are the ones that go to Google and search for it. But I found again because those are in random areas throughout the state that I’m not specifically targeting and ends up requiring more research on my part. And then it’s a market that I’m unsure about whether I can flip it quickly and all that other kind of stuff. So it’s that uncertainty is the reason why I don’t like those leads as much Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still make offers on them. But I like the areas that I’m specifically targeting through direct mail those areas better So again, just to kind of explain.

it’s just a different model period. So why am while your money or your life. Okay? What is it your money or your life niche? Not sure what that means?

Is It Okay To Optimize Two YouTube Channels For One Money Site

Anyway, so we’re gonna move on fit says good agents, I have a client posting on two different YouTube channels, only one optimized, should they optimize both? And add the money to site to both thanks for all you do. Yeah, I guess you could, uh, I don’t see how that could hurt anything. As long as it’s the same brand. I mean, I guess it depends on what it is that you’re doing. What it is that they’re doing? If it’s the same brand, but like, perhaps two different topics, or for whatever reason, then then yeah, I don’t see why that would hurt anything. Um, that’s what I would do. I mean, obviously, I need some more details, Fitz, to be able to give you a better answer, then that but I mean, if it’s the same brand, I don’t see why you couldn’t, it wouldn’t cause any ambiguity as long as you’re not, you know, trying to create two different types of brands for the same company if that makes sense.

What’s The Drawback If A Google Drive Folder Is Shared To Anyone With The Link Vs Sharing It Publicly?

So Okay, the next question is a G Drive folder is shared to anyone with the link versus public on the web. What’s the drawback? Or is it completely useless to do it that way? Is it thoroughly tested? I’ve heard it’s still good for buffering if you share with anyone with the link, but don’t know about entity validation. What’s your take? Marco? That’s a question for you.

The link shared folder has no fucking use that has to be public on the web. Really? It has to be it won’t pass if you Uh, no. It has to be public on the web man. Hmm. Now, even if you try the iframe that anyone with the link, it has it if you don’t do it right, it has a frame breaker. So once you if it has a frame breaker then we were losing all the benefits from what we now know, as our ys Academy reloaded, right? Because that’s built upon the power of the iframes and how they work. Okay,

so you’re saying his shit has to be public on the web to provide the benefits public and if you can’t do it, don’t worry. Go to MGYB to order drive second t site from us because we can make it public.

What’s The Drawback If A Google Drive Folder Is Shared To Anyone With The Link?

There you go. Rob says thanks, guys. Baby’s up. What’s up, baby? I was wondering where the hell you are today. He says, Hey, guys, after I asked all the External links variations now it’s time for a new wave. So so we’re gonna go through several weeks Marco has some other topic but one topic.

Yeah. 1000 ways. Maybe I’m giving you shit, man, we appreciate you, man. There’s no there’s no question. He says, Does the organization schema have to be on each page or just the home page? What page or post should the organization schema on which should be an article scheme? Okay, that’s a great question. And I’ve recently because of POFU Live and some of the training I’ve received from there, I started digging into schema more and I only put organization schema as the only schema on the homepage now. But if you understand the connected schema, then you can, you’ll still can work organizations schema into like local business schema or into article schema because the organization can be the publisher, there’s it’s connected schema is like combining schema types, but it has to be done correctly, or else it will ambiguity of the page that multiple schemas are on. So in other words, you have to understand how to connect schema properly, it’s not something we’re going to cover here, you’d have to go to heavy hitter club, that’s you that’s the place to be if you want to learn how to do that stuff. I’ve been learning from Marco and Rob and also doing some research on my own. And I’ve just recently begun to understand the idea of the concept of connected schema. And so I was actually doing it wrong for a lot of my own local business sites for the last couple of years because I would put organization schema sitewide. And then on location pages, I would have local business schema also. But that actually ambiguous. It’s the main entity of that particular page unless you combine them into a connected schema. And then you designate the main entity of the page or you can ref local like for example, local business schema can be the primary schema for a location page, but it can reference the overall parent organization. The same thing for articles schema, Article schema is going the primary entity of the pages the article itself, right. But then you can reference the publisher as an organization, for example, or even the author could be an organization. And that can pull in all of your organization schema with your same as attributes and everything else. You have to learn how to put that together properly. And I didn’t know how to do that until after I went through POFU Live. And I got to watch some of our speakers, which by the way, you can buy POFU Live recordings right now. So if you want to get a really good bass training for what connected schema is, and how you can develop this kind of stuff out, go get the POFU Live recordings. And I just want to mention, as I said, I realized after the POFU Live event and hearing some of our guest speakers, that I really needed to step my schema game up. And so I’ve spent the last several weeks now actually really tightening up my schema on a lot of my lead gen properties. And I’m starting to see some significant results from that already. But as so organization schema can go on all the pages if it’s nested within the other schema properly. Otherwise, just put it on your homepage or your about page or both. It can be on both of those even. But for everything else that would have the main entity of the page have that only schema on that particular page only unless you’re using connected schemas. So essentially nested schema where it would reference organization schema, hopefully, that didn’t confuse a lot of people. Mark, do you want to comment on it before I move on?

parent, child-parent, you can have organization either on the homepage or on the about page don’t make both if you’re going to do that I prefer it on the own baby to that’s where the bot will generally come in and go through the rescue website. So that’s what I like. As far as everything else. I mean, no, yeah. Don’t ambiguity. You’re in big trouble, man. Yeah.

Yeah. And that’s the thing. Like if you have multiple schemas on a page, and they’re not, you can actually main entity of page that’s it. That’s an attribute that’s a type that you can designate so that you can specify which one it is but if you’re using connected schema, or like you said Parent-Child, nested schema is another term for it, then it should validate correctly. Anyway. But yeah, it’s an interesting man, I didn’t realize how much I was missing drugs and data world until we had the poker live event. Now, that was my main takeaway. And I’ve told that to everybody. I was like, my main takeaway was I need to step my schema game up. And so I spent and I’m still just scratching the surface, Robin, and Marco, and heavy hitter clubs where you want to go for all of that stuff. Guys, there’s no question. It’s what we’re teaching a heavy hitter, man.

Yep. All right.

Last thing, I’m just gonna answer the part two real quick. And then we’ve got to wrap it up. He says, What if the homepage is general info, the representation of the brand, sort of, and then there is long-form post, which is targeted for the main service, keyword example tree removal, how to place schemas there. Yeah. So again, that would be I would consider that article schema. And you can also nest within article schema services, right? You can mention service. You can even have like offer catalogs, all that kind of stuff. Again, it’s a, it can get very, very complex. So you have to understand what it is that you’re doing. But I would say like a main like service page where with an article that talks about services, you could create a service schema type, but I don’t think that’s as valuable. And I don’t know, maybe Marco can answer that. Or maybe this isn’t the proper place to answer that. But I’m testing right now with some of my Tree Service sites having the like Tree Removal page, for example, marked up as a service page. And then I’ve got others that are article pages with nested services in it. I think the article page with a nested service is the proper way to go but I don’t know and that’s why I’m kind of testing and comparing right now. Mark Oh, am I am I revealing too much or what?

Yeah. Because that’s stuff I mean, how we, how we create the relationships and and how we stack the schemas. What it’s what’s dealt with in the heavy hitter club.

There you go. So that was a tease, go go join heavy hitter club guys. It’s inexpensive, and it’s totally worth it if you want that kind of technical knowledge. So all right. Thanks, everybody for being here. We got to wrap it up. Everyone knows next week. Thanks, guys.

Source: Semantic Mastery Weekly SEO Q&A – Hump Day Hangouts – Episode 310 published first on your-t1-blog-url

0 notes

localwebmgmt · 3 years

Text

Weekly SEO Q&A – Hump Day Hangouts – Episode 310

youtube

Click on the video above to watch Episode 310 of the Semantic Mastery Hump Day Hangouts.

Full timestamps with topics and times can be found at the link above.

The latest upcoming free SEO Q&A Hump Day Hangout can be found at http://semanticmastery.com/humpday.

Announcement

Doing good here? Good. They can complain and yeah, I think we got something pretty sweet coming. Oh, really? I made a video about something today, so, huh?

All right. Well, now I’m curious. I don’t even know what you’re talking about.

Well check Facebook.

Ah, all right. I will check it out. Bradley, you got the tech stuff done. Are you available?

Well, it’s the fucking video still not on know that on the page. Click Funnels bullshit. I’m tired of it. And I really am.

It’s still not even there we go. Yeah, it’s updated now.

Well, it’s not for me.

Gotcha. Well, we’ll circle back around. I’m going to type something in while I ask her not How you doing today, man?

Great, man. I’m in Miami. Having fun. Everything’s good.

Well, you got to talk for a little bit longer. I gotta, I gotta touch.

I’ve heard that you’re in Miami. Is that true?

Those are right now, but we still had it. So.

What about POFU?

About It was a great event.

Oh my god, what about it?

The live of the recordings are available, right?

Should be right.

Yes, that what I was just talking about or not my losing my mind about POFU.

This has got me all screwed up. Because the format has changed in the last couple of weeks. And after years of having one particular startup format. It’s hard to hard to transition.

All right,

you guys are seeing my screen now. Correct. Good to go. Yes.

Yep. All right.

What Is The Name Of The Upcoming Buffer Site S3 Creator?

Should You Make A Separate Page For Each Location When Siloing A Local Service Business Site?

There you go. Let me unpause the screen for a minute if I can find it. Okay.

What Do You Recommend For A Self-Hosted URL Shortener?

All right, there we go on the resume share again.

Because doing some background stuff. Alright.

Can You Make Multiple GStacks On One Google Account That Are Interconnected?

Let me see, of course, there is.

Why would you want to go and break up the well, not a limitation? But why would you want to put two things that are unrelated in the same dry stack?

We go for G stacks under one account. So different g stacks, but yes,

no? No. Okay.

Is It Better To Have An Old Google Account Better Than A Gsuite Account When Creating Drive Stacks?

How Do We Use of Text Transcripts From Videos For Traffic And Link Building Purposes?

There you go. Always keep some, some in reserve, right.

How Do You Properly Optimize The GMB And Website Of An Old Business?

I’m not sure what why am why Oh, niches What does that mean? Do you know what y m y l means?

Marco? You’re You’re muted

by the way.

What is okay?

Nevermind.

I’m sorry. Somebody want to answer that?

Now? I thought I thought it was something else. MF

it’s just a different model period. So why am while your money or your life. Okay? What is it your money or your life niche? Not sure what that means?

Is It Okay To Optimize Two YouTube Channels For One Money Site

What’s The Drawback If A Google Drive Folder Is Shared To Anyone With The Link Vs Sharing It Publicly?

What’s The Drawback If A Google Drive Folder Is Shared To Anyone With The Link?

Yep. All right.

Yeah. Because that’s stuff I mean, how we, how we create the relationships and and how we stack the schemas. What it’s what’s dealt with in the heavy hitter club.

Source: Semantic Mastery Weekly SEO Q&A – Hump Day Hangouts – Episode 310 published first on your-t1-blog-url

0 notes

an-almost-dropped-croissant · 6 years

Note

What’s the story on what your principal does? Cause I’d like to know a little more about the story behind it, but. Regardless of what it is, I am 100% HERE for getting him fired for harassing people, however it is that he’s doing that. Because it’s not okay. Hats off to you for wanting to start a student revolution. You got my respect 🙌👏❤️

Thank you for asking, I figured nobody would care about this. This is gonna be a long post. I’m think about making this thread an event-to-event kind of record of what’s happening. So let’s jump into this mother goose nursery tale.

For the past two years, my school has had a new principal. His name will be changed for privacy reasons to Mr. Jones. One thing you need to know about Mr. Jones is that he’s 6'7", a gym teacher, and very aware of his size. This man is huge and intimidating.

My first interaction with the man involved him forcefully brushing snow off of the back of my jacket in eighth grade. I had no clue who this man was, and he scared me. The next time I saw him he was reading my class an excerpt from his book of memoirs. He seemed chill enough, but he still had me on edge. Maybe it’s just my distrust of men, especially large men. So I don’t think twice about it.

Third interaction and he’s in my class again. To ‘break the ice’ he starts telling us a story in a comedic manner. Except it’s not funny, it’s cruel. At his old school, a child had pulled on a girl’s ponytail, so he was supposed to deal with him. In that particular school, they had a hallway for the locker rooms. He cornered the kid in that hallway and screamed at him so loudly that you could hear him on the other side of the school. According to him, the kid shit himself. Sounds fake, but whatever. The problem is that he laughed about it. He though him intimidating and bullying a child who had made a dumb mistake was ok somehow. That scared me.

As the months passed, we never spoke. I’m a good kid so I never had to go to the office for any conflicts. Occassionally he would comment snidely about my lipstick or the length of my shirts (which were well within dress code with high waisted jeans). I’d overhear him talking about how girls my age shouldn’t wear such dark colours and should stick to Chapstick. As time passed I realized I wasn’t the only one he said this stuff to. Keep in mind, I’m in ninth grade. In Canada middle school is 7,8, and 9. I’m fourteen, fifteen next month.

Things were worse than lipstick. He would comment on their shirts, leggings, ripped jeans, heels, sometimes in private and sometimes in front of their friends. One thing he never commented on were the dresses our sports teams were required to wear for comps. He’d find any excuse to shame you for what you wear, even if you were covered, just because he didn’t like it. He’d nitpick anything he could get when it came to slutshaming children. He did this to the twelve-year-olds, too.Then there was the touching. My town has a reputation for pedophilic teachers; a band teacher from our high school was just fired weeks ago for sexual assault allegations over the course of many years. This however was harder to prove, which feels like exactly why he did it.

With the boys, you’d get a hand on the shoulder, arm, etc. With the girls, you’d be led by your waist. Fun fact: in my province we have a strict no touching policy for teachers. Even if a six-year-old is bawling you can’t hug them. Now this jackass, instead of asking you to move, would put his hands on you and physically move you. There’s also a story about a girl that he shoulder bumped for standing on the benches. He invades personal space daily and picks favourites to tease. One of my friends was targeted not too long ago. He would wait at her locker every morning for her to take off her coat so he could comment on how inappropriately she was dressing. She reported it, but nothing actually happened.

So now that you understand the context, let’s begin.

I was in gym today and we were playing badminton. I had forgotten my sneakers because it’s winter so I was wearing timberlands. Let me just say, they were clean. Not a fleck of dirt. The snow had washed them off and they were dry. I was stood next to my classmates waiting for my turn in the singles tournament we had been playing. I see Mr. Jones coming towards us and he’s making this intimidating eye contact with me as he approached. He asked for my name and pulled me aside.

He had sat me down inbetween him and another teacher, even when I tried to sit where I wasn’t surrounded. He asked me how long I’ve gone to this school, my homeroom and internally I’m panicking. I have anxiety, and after recent events I’ve been in a bad place. I was already on edge, but this just really did it. This is where it gets fun. He said, “you seem like a smart girl, so I don’t understand why you think it’s acceptable for you to be wearing those work boots.” That was the note that he hit on over and over in this conversation. I don’t understand why you think this is ok. And because of how indirect he is, I asked if this was a serious conversation and he said it was very serious. I was defensive so I kept saying stuff like 'i forgot my sneakers’ and 'its safer to wear these than to go in socks for badminton’. He kept pushing me. I kept pushing back in a respectful way.

He said, “I expected you to be like 'oh shit’ and say you’d never do it again but here we are.” Me being the little shit that I am responded with, “ I’d never swear at you”. Shots. Fired. He said it was nice to meet me and sent me back to my group. I was on the verge of a panic attack and I was going to start hyperventilating if I didn’t leave so I grabbed my nearest friend and booked it. We went to the locker room so I could calm down and I explained the conversation. How he talked down to me, insinuated that I was stupid for my choice in footwear, intimidated me. She was pressed as hell and so was I.

When all the other girls came back we talked about it and I heard stories about the screwed up things he’s said and done to my peers. I was furious, but still was on the verge of a panic attack. So I, along with another girl who had found the confidence to report him, and our friend went to my homeroom to explain the situation. She referred us to the guidance counselor. We all sat together and discussed the issue and she agreed that this was unacceptable. Halfway through the meeting she gets a phone call. Guess who it’s from.

That’s right. Mr. Jones.

With thirty seconds warning, he waltzed in and sat opposite me at the round table. My friends were scared but were trying to be strong for my sake. I knew that this was my battle to fight and I needed to be reasonable so he’d have nothing to fight back on. I explain my side of the situation to him and he keeps repeating how he doesn’t understand how I think this is ok. He said how I’m making excuses and not acting my age. This is when I get angry.

I start asking why he called me out specifically. Why not the others with dirtyass sneakers. Why he dealt with it the way he did. You know that thing liars do where they tell a story to make the lie seem true? He did that. He said that outside shoes don’t belong in gym. Went on and on about how he has to sweep the floors before his teams practice so they don’t hurt themselves on the rocks. I stated that everyone else didn’t own indoor sneakers, they had dirty shoes too. He said that he deals with them to in his class. I say I’m not in his class, and my actual teacher didn’t say anything. Apparently in his eyes that’s a big problem. He makes excuse after excuse and I’m past the point of being done. The more I call him out the more he tries to blame it all on me. He tried to get my guidance counselor to join him in yelling at me and was annoyed when she wouldn’t pick a side.

He kept going and my band had snapped. Within ten seconds I was hyperventilating and sobbing. According to one of my friends, he smiled at the counselor in a condescending way. The counselor claimed it was to lighten the mood but it felt more cruel. He said he didn’t mean to make me have a panic attack or intimidate me. Never once did he apologize. He sat there staring at me until I asking him very directly to leave.

I had my attack brought in after five minutes of tissues, breathing, and water. We discussed the conversation. When the bell rang, I dragged my weak ass to my locker, praying he wouldn’t confront me on my own. Luckily my friends surrounded me. As I explained what happened to those who weren’t there, he came over and leaned against the wall a few doors down from mine. I gave him a look then left. This could have been handled with a simple question of 'where are your sneakers.’

I’m done. I’m done with the fact that there’s this unspoken thing of him touching and saying inappropriate things to children. I'm done with him picking fights to feel big. The adults are too scared to fight back for us, either that or they just don’t want to. We live in a world where students are fighting to change gun laws in Florida. Malala was not much older than I am when she was shot. Children can change this world when adults don’t see the need for change. They think it doesn’t affect them because they can just ignore it. They’re wrong. If you yell at me I will scream back. You will not silence my voice.

The current plan is to get a wide assortment of girls and male witnesses to make statements saying that he is guilty and should not be around children. Nobody likes how he treats us girls, we’re just too afraid to speak out about it because we’ve been taught that authority is to be respected and situations like these have to be tolerated. Nothing has to be tolerated.

I’ll keep you guys updated.

2 notes · View notes

yuriplisetskysglove · 7 years

Text

If Only Time Would Wait For Us

So... I was tired, and started watching Theory of Everything. Keyword: started. I couldn’t get past the first half of the movie because my heart couldn’t take it, I just couldn’t watch it alone. Instead, I had a terrible idea that will most likely get me killed by basically everyone in this fandom and I apologize in advance for the angst. Written on the spot, so I’m sorry if it’s a bit raw and sketchy. Please tell me if you find any grammar or spelling mistakes, and typos ! One-shot under the cut.

Summary: There is a place, made for all kinds of dreamers. A school for people who want to live through what they love. For people who do live through what they love. Yes, these people are believers. This is the story of a boy who kept dreaming until the very end. Otabek Altin is a third year music student at Raein University. He has everything an 18-year-old would dream of: great family and friends, a motorcycle, passion. Or so he thought, until he met him. Yuri Plisetsky is the adoptive brother of a Raein probationer. A second year, attending the arts degree course. He is everything an ordinary student would dream of being. Talented to no ends, beautiful, popular despite his snarky remarks. They find out how complementary they are, like souls calling on to each other from each side of a battlefield. A battlefield called Time.

Warning: Extremely angsty.

Raein University. The school of dreamers, of believers, of all people who hope to live through love. This is where Otabek Altin studies. He has been for the past two years, and he now is beginning his third. This place, that at first looked so big, too big maybe, now felt like home. And as soon as he entered the great iron gates, a warm feeling started spreading in his chest. He parked his motorcycle, and then headed for the gymnasium where the Entrance Ceremony was to be held. They still hadn’t opened the doors; and there were students everywhere, talking with old friends, or perhaps making new ones ? He didn’t know. What he did know however, was that he was looking for his very own group of friends. Amid the crowd, he got sight of a mass of red hair, and he almost had to force his way to his best friend, Mila Babicheva. He patted her shoulder, and the Russian lady turned around with a huge grin across her face.

‘Why, if it isn’t our little Otabek ! How have you been ?”

‘We’ve seen each other like, two days ago, Mila’, Otabek smiled.

‘Yeah well, if I want to be polite for once, why not let me be ?’

They started talking, just like they did everyday, about what songs they had been listening to during summer, about Mila’s last few compositions she had been posting on YouTube, about Otabek’s playlist for their next party - which was due to that very night -, about their classmates they were impatient to see again, about Mila’s girlfriend Sara and how much she loved her and missed her already... It was an ordinary day that felt extraordinary. And Otabek had a feeling it wouldn’t stop there. The rumbling of the doors against the ground interrupted them, and they joined the many, many students, to seat onto the ever-so-uncomfortable plastic chairs. Chairman Feltsman then started his usual welcoming speech, standing so tall on the already high stage. To be completely honest, neither Otabek nor Mila really listened to his words. They knew about school rules already - and had been joyfully breaking them for the past two years. They also knew their teachers, and they all looked as bored as the students.

‘Now, I would like you all to welcome Mr. Plushenko’s trainee for this year.’

A tall man stepped out of the teachers’ line, and you could hear people gasping and squealing everywhere in the room. He was handsome. Very handsome. Silver hair fell before his face; turquoise eyes shining brightly as his mouth curved into a heart-shaped smile.

‘Hello everyone’, he claimed in a loud, cheery voice. ‘I am Viktor Nikiforov ! Nice to meet you all ! This year, I’ll be working under Mr. Plushenko - hope you’ll treat me well ! I have plenty of ideas I’d like you to try, so I’m counting on you, music students !’

‘How old does he think we are’, Mila snorted. ‘Funny guy, though, I can totally see why Plushenko took him as a trainee. He’s every bit as extra as him.’

‘By the way, please be nice to my little brother too ! He’s right there - hey, Yurio ! You also have to be nice to your comrades, alright ?’

Everyone turned to follow the probationer’s gaze, up to a boy who had just stood up, looking like every inch of his body had turned into raw fury. He seemed frail, though. His blonde hair hid his right eye, while his left was a stunning, pale green. His cheeks had gotten red of anger - or was it embarrassment ? - as he started screaming at his older brother.

‘Shut the fuck up, Viktor ! How many times have I told you to mind your own goddamn business ?!’

‘Ooooh, it’s him’, Mila said pensively. ‘I had already spotted him earlier, but I thought he was a girl, he’s so skinny and cute. Totally your type, though. Watcha think, Otabek ?’

The man wasn’t even listening. He was too busy staring at the younger student. His first thought was that he looked very, very pale. But given the Nikiforov last name, he must be Russian. Maybe he was biased by Mila’s light tan.

‘Please forgive my Yuri’s rudeness’, Nikiforov laughed. ‘He’s into his rebellious teenage phase, but I can swear he’s actually really kind-hearted ! He loves cats and plushies and -’

His sentence was cut straight by an unknown rectangular object being thrown at him, and he dodged it swiftly as it went crashing into the wall just behind him. His frowned.

‘Yuratchka, is that the phone I bought you merely a month ago ?’

‘Of course not, stupid old man. It’s your piglet’s.’

‘Yuratchka, did you just throw my husband’s phone at me ? Nevermind, when did you even take it ?!’

‘Uh, like, two hours ago ? When we left ? And stop reminding everyone you’re married, it’s fucking gross.’

‘You were the one crying at the wedding, though.’

‘You fucking -’

‘Alright, I think it will be enough for today, Mr. Nikiforov, Plisetsky’, Chairman Feltsman yelled.

It took a few seconds for Otabek’s brain to register that Plisetsky was the boy’s last name. He wondered for a few seconds why both brothers didn’t share a name, but decided not to think about it for too long. It was none of his business, after all. As the excitement toned down a bit, Chairman Feltsman asked every homeroom teacher to call their students. Mila and Otabek were together again - it was to be expected - with their friend Jean-Jacques Leroy. The Canadian loudly shouted their names as he went to crush them into a hug. They hadn’t seen him for almost a month, as he had returned home with his girlfriend Isabella to see his younger siblings. Said girlfriend lightly waved at them from the arts students’ ranks, and she tucked a strand of black hair behind her ear before going to see Guang-Hong Ji and Kenjirou Minami.

‘Has any of you seen Leo ?’ JJ asked while looking over the crowd. ‘He did say he’d be late, but I don’t think anyone came into the gym during Feltsman’s speech ?’

‘Maybe he just waited outside, JJ’, Mila answered, shrugging.

Sure enough, Leo de la Iglesia was waiting for them, his back to the gym’s wall. When he spotted them, he took off his earphones, and sneakily joined the ranks trailing behind Plushenko and Nikiforov.

‘Hey guys’, he smiled.

‘You missed quite the commotion’, Otabek told him with a smirk.

‘Yeah, all the girls in the arts section were talking about it. Handsome new kid and cute new teach ?’

‘Half right. Handsome new teach and cute new kid’, Mila chuckled. ‘By the way, the teach is Plushenko’s trainee.’

‘Seriously ? Damn, I hope he’s not as hard on us as Plushenko is...'

‘He looks rather cool’, JJ said. ‘And funny.’

‘Yup, definitely funny.’

As they all sat in Music Room no.01 - more like a music hall, really -, and Plushenko began his traditional start-of-the-year speech that no one ever listened to, Otabek couldn’t help but think about Yuri Plisetsky. He was intriguing him.

September passed by so quickly that it felt as though they had been sitting in that gym merely a week ago. Otabek was now buried underneath his music scores and studies notes, laying on the ground of Music Room no.02. Just as he was slowly drifting into a nap, he heard the door opening, and closing, then followed by the sound of a bag being dumped on the ground. He woke up, startled, thinking it might be a teacher, but it wasn’t. It was a blonde, petite boy, with a camera in his hands. He looked as surprised as Otabek was. The latter was the first to break the silence.

‘What are you doing here ?’ he asked softly.

‘... I have an assignment.’

‘And you wanted to take a picture of this music room ? Music Room no.01 is much prettier.’

‘I wanted to take that one. Also, it’s not merely about taking a picture. Now, if you could get outta here, thanks.’

Well, at least he was polite enough to say ‘thanks’. And he didn’t swear. Which sure was a form of progress, compared to the show he had given them at the Entrance Ceremony.

‘I kind of... Have to study here’, Otabek answered gently.

‘It won’t be long.’

‘Do you really need the room to be empty ?’

‘Do you really need me to kick your face, asshole ?’

So long for progress.

‘You’re not the only one who has to get assignments done.’

‘D’you need to get yours done in like, thirty minutes ?’

‘Twenty, actually.’

‘It can wait then, mine’s in ten.’

‘You just need to take a picture. I need to work on a score.’

‘I need to take a picture and fucking paint on it so now if you could just get the fuck outta that room and lemme -’

‘What is the commotion here ?!’

Mr. Plushenko had found them. Before any of the boys could say anything, he took them each by an ear, and threw them both into the corridor with all their stuff - mostly Otabek’s, but there was Yuri’s bag as well. They exchanged a look.

‘Well, now, I guess we’re both fucked for our assignments’, the blonde muttered.

And then, they burst out laughing, not really knowing why, and they were laughing almost maniacally in the middle of the school, teachers and students alike throwing them weirded out glances as they passed by. When they finally calmed down, they smiled at each other, and Otabek couldn’t help but chuckle. The boy was aggressive, swore like a sailor, but was weirdly endearing.

‘Rooftop ?’ the music student proposed.

‘... What ? You want us to jump from there ?’

‘Of course not. But it’d be better than a busy corridor to walk on my score.’

‘Oh.’

‘And I thought you could come with me.’

‘That’s... Nice. But I’d rather not. Gonna get yelled at by the old hag if I don’t come back to the workshop with something at least somewhat decent.’

‘The old hag...? Are you talking about Mrs. Baranovskaya ?!’

‘Who else ?’

As they talked, they got up, and soon enough they were strolling together through the entire floor, purposefully or not taking the long way to reach each of their respective destinations. They stopped before the Arts Studio no.09, and as soon as Mrs. Baranovskaya saw Yuri through the glass door, she scowled.

‘Well’, the blonde sighed. ‘Imma get roasted. See you.’

‘Will I ?’

The younger boy stopped to look at Otabek. Then, a shy smile took shape on his lips.

‘What’s your name ?’

‘Otabek Altin. Music course, third year.’

‘Yuri Plisetsky. Second year.’

And then, he went into the room.

‘Soooo. Heard you talked with the Plisexy boy.’

‘Plisetsky. And you’re drunk, Mila.’

‘But you did talk to him, you swift playboy…’

‘Who even told you that ?’

‘Well, Isabella, you dummy. Do we know other people from the arts course ?’

‘We do. Guang-Hong and Kenjirou.’

‘Awwww, riiiight. Them.’

‘Mila, Guang-Hong is Leo’s boyfriend, don’t act like you don’t know him.’

Indeed, Guang-Hong was on the dancefloor with Leo, and they were both dancing to I Love Rock’n’Roll before a squealing Kenjirou, who had been rooting for them for years. Besides him, his classmate Isabella was sitting on JJ’s lap, and they were having a drinking contest, judging by the vodka shots lined up before them. Not too far from them, their former classmates Phichit and Seung-Gil were talking with Georgi and his new girlfriend, Judith. Otabek pensively stared at them all.

‘Why didn’t you invite him ?’

Apparently, a drunk Mila was sharper than a sober Mila, because she had just voiced his thoughts. He could still hear his laugh from earlier ringing in his ears. For some reason, he really wished the blonde was there with them, enjoying a crazy night of music and dancing and drinking… Maybe he was too young to drink. How old was he ? What kind of music did he like ? Was dancing something he deemed ‘at least somewhat decent’ for him ?

‘Okay, Otabek, you clearly wanna invite the guy. Gimme his number, I’ll call him for ya.’

‘I… Don’t have his number, Mila. It’s been like, seven hours since we had that talk and it was nothing.’

‘Isabella didn’t say it was, lmao.’

‘Why would you say ‘lmao’ in a verbal conversation, Mila ?’

‘Am drunk, ya said it yourself dummy. Anyway. Isabella said it wasn’t nothing.’

‘Isabella was mistaken.’

‘Well see, the thing is, the boy got owned by Baranovskaya…’

‘And ?’

‘And to punish him she had him pose as their dynamic model for the rest of the day…’

‘Ouch.’

‘Yup. And the boy was soooo flustered he couldn’t stand straight and he kinda collapsed, face red and stuff, and then he got right up and told Baranovskaya he couldn’t do it !’

‘Mila, I don’t think that’s because we exchanged like, two words.’

‘Stop lying dude, the whole goddamn university knows you’ve been laughing your asses off just before Music Room no.02 after Plushenko kicked you outta there. What was he doin’ there anyway ?’

‘He wanted to take a picture for -’

‘Damn, he’s sure going fast, wanting to take a picture of ya nappin’ so early on ! Hey guys, guess what ?!’ she suddenly shouted.

Otabek didn’t even have the time to see his life flash before his eyes. The next second, Mila Babicheva was cheerfully destroying all kinds of dignity he had left and spreading rumors of him dating Yuri Plisetsky. The worst part ? He actually liked the idea.

He took that back. That wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was how, the following day, everyone kept asking him if what Mila and JJ had posted on all of their social media was true. Otabek hated SNS and there was a reason for that. At least, both his classmates had apologized - but he wasn’t the one they should have been apologizing to first and foremost, per se. That’s why he took them both to Arts Studio no.09, despite JJ’s whining about how the small blonde was scarier than Otabek himself. When they got there however, they found Mr. Nikiforov, talking with his brother. More like arguing, given their angry faces and the faint sound of their voices coming from the slightly opened door.

‘I… Think we should go’, JJ whispered as all three of them exchanged curious looks.

‘We should indeed’, Otabek agreed.

But Mila just had to crawl past the door, unnoticed, and crouched down so her ears were near the door. She gestured them to come and eavesdrop with her, but both frowned, and she rolled her eyes before going back to listening. It only took a short while for her eyes to widen, and she let out a faint gasp. JJ and Otabek immediately hid in the corner, and Mila scrambled to her feet. But Mr. Nikiforov and his brother were faster than her.

‘Oh, eavesdropping I see ?’ Nikiforov smiled.

But it wasn’t the heart-shaped smile he had gotten them used to. It was a cold, angry smile that quite literally screamed of disgust.

‘Um, hello, Mr. Niki-’

‘Come in, Mila.’

‘Sir, I -’

‘Don’t say you didn’t mean to while you did. Yuri, I’m not done yet, but I believe we will have to pursue this conversation back home.’

‘Yeah right, a ‘conversation’. People actually listen to each other during a conversation, Viktor.’

‘Yuri.’

Blue eyes met green ones, and the blonde lowered his head like a child being scolded. The older man went into the studio with Mila who, as soon as he had closed the door, started apologizing profusely. Yuri simply walked to the corner past JJ and Otabek, but stopped in the middle of the corridor.

‘Next time you wanna spy on us, send someone more discreet, Altin.’

Otabek’s brain hadn’t even registered the boy’s words that he had disappeared to another floor. JJ and him exchanged a confused look, and they didn’t talk at all while waiting for Mila. Silences usually weren’t too disturbing to them; but this time, there was a feeling of uneasiness crawling under Otabek’s skin. What was that boy thinking…? Suddenly, Mila burst out of the studio, looking furious.

‘Where did he go’, she shouted. ‘Where did that goddamn kid go ?!’

‘Mila’, Nikiforov quietly said as he followed her down the hall. ‘Remember. I don’t want anyone else to know about that. It is his own choice.’

‘He’s crazy.’

‘I think he might be as well, but he won’t listen, no matter what you tell him. Now, I thank you for your concern, but I’d like you to forget everything about these conversations.’

‘I can’t.’

‘Let me correct myself. You have to forget everything about these conversations.’

‘But -’

‘And if everyone else knows about this, I will know this is your doing. So I ask you, Mila, to spare the both - no, the three of us any trouble and stay out of this.’

‘... Alright.’

‘Good. I’ll see you later in class, then.’

The silver-haired man then went in the opposite direction. He seemingly hadn’t noticed JJ and Otabek. The former tilted his head at Mila, who only shook her head.

‘You heard him. I’m not telling the both of you. Sorry.’

‘Don’t worry about it’, they both said.

The rest of the day went almost too normally. Mr. Nikiforov was back to his cheery and joyous self. He had brought a record of his own favorite song, named In Regards to Love.

‘So, Mr. Plushenko told me you had studied the art of arranging a same piece in different ways, right ? Today, I want us to dive deeper into that subject. I will now make you listen to two arrangements of this song. The first one is named Agape. I would like you to guess what the song is about, without translating the lyrics of course.’

The high-pitched, soft and pure voice of a child then echoed in the classroom, and Otabek felt like the notes were taking him elsewhere. A place no one could have ever even thought of reaching. He had no words to describe his awe as he stared at the white wall just in front of him, listening, his fingers slightly waving with the melody as he always did when he was listening to music. He could picture a figure, graciously dancing through the notes. And then, just like that, the song was finished. It was like he had brutally crashed onto the ground after taking flight.

‘This second arrangement’s name is Eros.’

Guitar and castanets, and a fiery rhythm that seeked to take the audience away with its thirst for adventure. The final destination wasn’t clear, but it didn’t matter. What was important was the journey the music was taking them on. He unconsciously started tapping on his desk, and the beat suddenly went faster and faster, and then it calmed down before going to yet another peak. The figure that had been weaving through the score was now jumping from a line to another, and when the last note rang in his ears, he could see the small silhouette falling onto its knees, having finally reached its goal. Not a single student could say a single word about it. They were awestruck. Granted, they had listened their fair share of good music, but this was… Different. And they could all feel it. The bell rang, and Mr. Nikiforov asked them to write an analysis of those two arrangements for the following week. The students were too impressed to complain.

The next time he met Yuri was in a restaurant. He wasn’t expecting the blonde to work as a waiter during weekends. It just seemed off to him, for some reason.

‘Altin’, he greeted him.

He apparently hadn’t forgiven Mila’s eavesdropping yet, and it sounded like he still believed Otabek had sent her. This was his chance to make things right between them.

‘Hey, Plisetsky.’

‘Whattaya want ?’

‘I wanted to apologize, actua -’

‘I wasn’t talking about that. I was asking you what you want to drink.’

‘Oh.’

‘My service’s over in half an hour.’

‘Right. Um… Just a bottle of AriZona. Green tea and honey.’

‘Coming.’

The music student did get his bottle, along with a suspicious look on the blonde’s part. Half an hour later, he was sitting on a bench in a nearby park, legs crossed. He hadn’t opened his bottle at all.

‘So’, Yuri started. ‘You said you wanted to apologize.’

‘Uh… Yeah. For those posts and Mia.’

‘Posts ? Oh, you mean, SNS stuff ? I read it, yeah. Didn’t know I was dating you.’

‘I didn’t know that either.’

They both chuckled, and Otabek felt a little better. He was afraid those dumb posts would ruin the beginning of friendship he had created with the blonde.

‘As for your real girlfrien -’

‘She’s not.’

‘She’s not ?’

‘Nope. She has a girlfriend herself, see.’

‘Oh.’

‘And, what about her ?’

‘Yeah well, Viktor told me he was a bit… Harsh on her. He was still angry after our talk and took it all out on her so… I’m the one who should be apologizing about it. Though I still think Viktor was wrong.’

‘What were you two arguing about ?’ Otabek couldn’t help but ask.

A pair of pale green eyes stared at him, and he felt his heart beating faster. He had beautiful eyes. Eyes he would never forget for sure.

‘She didn’t tell you…?’

‘After Mr. Nikiforov scolded her, she didn’t want to. Said it was your own problem.’

‘... That’s pretty cool of her. For an eavesdropper, I mean.’

The younger boy laid back a second, looking at the sky. He then got up, took Otabek’s bottle from his hands, and drank half of it in one go. And all the other man could do was stare.

‘She’s right. It’s my own problem, and that’s why Viktor shouldn’t be meddling with it either.’

‘Is it… Serious ?’

The blonde merely smirked.

‘Yeah, you could say that, I guess.’

He smiled, and all of a sudden, the notes of Welcome to the Madness - a song Otabek himself really liked - started playing. Yuri took his phone out of his pocket.

‘Hey, Katsudon. … Yeah, I know, coming home right away if the other old man isn’t there. … Whattaya mean he - oh fuck I told him not to… Ugh. Yeah I know you must have. Okay. I’ll see you there, then.’

He hung up, and turned to Otabek.

‘Gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow at school. If... That’s okay with you, I mean.’

‘Why wouldn’t it ?’

He stretched his hand at the arts student.

‘Are you going to become my friend or not ?’

The blonde chuckled, and shook it.

‘Yeah, I think I am. Oh, by the way, give me your number. It’ll be easier than strolling around the whole goddamn campus to find you.’

‘I’m usually napping in Music Room no.02.’

‘Well yeah, except I have classes at noon.’

‘I’m not only napping at noon.’

They laughed, and then Yuri ran to catch his bus. Otabek wondered for a second where he was going. Line 42 had only four stops left before terminus. The hospital ?

The following months felt a bit like a dream. It had become a habit for them to meet on the rooftop at noon. Yuri was always the first one up there; Otabek didn’t understand how he could do that, though. His timetable was much crueler than his, and yet the blonde still had time to run off to buy some food for the both of them - Otabek was a bit low on his allowance and had no part-time job to make up for it - and climb all the way up to the roof. There, they usually sat and looked at all the other students in the courtyard, or the teachers running one after another to exchange info and such. They would create stories for each person of the school, from the cleaning lady to Chairman Feltsman. Otabek would put on some music - it turned out they had quite similar tastes, so the older man was extremely proud to introduce his friend to new bands - and Yuri would show him all the pretty pictures he had taken with his phone. Most of them were of his cat Potya, whom he loved more than his brother it seemed; others were of his own paintings and drawings.

‘Why are you laughing, Beka ?’ Yuri scolded when he showed him his most recent drawing.

‘I love looking at your art.’

‘Don’t laugh at me, street boy.’

‘I’m not mocking you, I’m serious. Who would expect the ever-so-aggressive Yuri Plisetsky to paint over three hundred pictures of his cat ?’

‘Potya is a great model, I’ll have you know.’

‘Yura, you live with one of the most handsome men the world has known.’

‘Says who ? A blind old hag ?’

‘Did you just call Mila a blind old hag ?’

‘Yeah, well she is old and she’s a hag so I guess I almost got it right.’

‘Does that mean I’m old ?’

‘Kinda, but at least you’re not a hag.’

‘You do know we’re only two years older, right ? Don’t get all cocky because you skipped a grade, Mr. Teen Genius Plisetsky.’

The blonde rolled his eyes, and then proceeded to lay his head onto Otabek’s lap, who immediately felt his cheeks burn.

‘What do you think you’re doing’, he muttered.

‘Why, getting cocky, of course. Since I’m Mr. Teen Genius Plisetsky. Also, I needed a pillow.’

‘You could have used your bag.’

‘I wanted to use you. Clear enough ?’

‘... Yeah.’

As Yuri was scrolling through his Instagram, Otabek absent-mindedly started playing with his soft hair. He was half expecting Yuri to snap at him, or to purr, but his friend did neither and instead sighed and shrugged.

‘Beka.’

‘What is it ?’

‘I… There are some things about me you don’t know.’

This surprised him. He wasn’t used to Yuri being so serious in their time together. Like all friends do, he would sometimes write huge texts about his feelings, but he would never explain where those emotions were coming from. All Otabek knew was that Yuri and Viktor kept arguing over an issue that concerned Yuri alone; and there also was something about a promise Viktor had made and never kept.

‘There are indeed, Yura.’

‘And you’re okay with that ?’

The dark-haired man had to think about it for a moment.

‘To be completely honest, no. I want to know what’s making you feel so angry towards everything. And why you’re always arguing with your brother. I… I want to know what’s hurting you so much, Yura.’

The blonde didn’t say a word. He had his back turned to Otabek, which made it impossible for him to guess how the younger boy was feeling.

‘... I can’t tell you about the arguments with Viktor. I can tell you about a few other things, though.’

‘Go ahead.’

‘I wasn’t really adopted by the Nikiforovs.’

‘You weren’t ?’

‘My guardian technically still is my Grandpa. But he’s getting old, and my parents don’t really have time to take care of me. So Viktor, who’s… My childhood friend, offered him to take me in. Grandpa didn’t want to, you see. He was worried. But I was, too. About him.’

‘Is that why you’re working part-time ?’

‘I’m paying his medicine, yeah. Can’t do much else. Also, his health isn’t that bad, he’s just a bit… Fragile, because of age. That’s all.’

‘Then, the money you use to pay me my meals…’

‘It’s okay. That’s just some bonus. Grandpa gets his share every month, don’t worry.’

‘I see. Please, go on if there are other things you’d like to tell me.’

For a few minutes, there was only silence. Otabek felt like Yuri was weighing his words, and he wondered what was making him so anxious. If only he knew… Then maybe, just maybe, he could do something about it. He would do anything to make this beautiful soldier feel better.

‘I…’

And then, Otabek felt them. Yuri’s tears, on his jeans. He was completely caught off-guard and stopped stroking his hair. He gently nudged him.

‘Yura. Turn your face to me.’

‘No.’

‘You’re crying.’

‘Wrong.’

‘Yura. Tell me. It’s okay. I’ll still love you no matter what.’

‘You won’t. Only three people ever did.’

‘Let me be the fourth.’

‘You’re gonna say I’m a freak and a liar.’

‘I’m gonna say I love that freak and that liar.’

‘You were supposed to say ‘I’m not gonna say you’re a freak and a liar’.’

‘But I didn’t, because I always surprise you and never say what you think I am going to say. Don’t you think I can do that again ?’

Silence, again. Yuri sat right up again with difficulty, and turned his tears stained face to Otabek. The dark-haired man simply used his own jacket’s sleeve to shed away the other boy’s tears, and gave him a smile, followed by a tight hug. His thumbs traced circles on the blonde’s back, who slowly started relaxing into his arms.

‘I’m trans’, Yuri ended up saying, his nose buried in his friend’s jacket.

Otabek simply hugged him tighter. They stayed like that for a few minutes, the music student still gently tracing circles onto Yuri’s back, and the blonde embracing him like his life depended on it.

‘You don’t think it’s weird ?’ Yuri finally sobbed.

‘I already had doubts, to be honest. You never agreed to go to the gym with JJ and me. At first, I thought it might just be because you didn’t like sports, but then you said you’d been ice-skating and doing ballet as a kid, so… I thought it ought to be something else.’

‘You could have just asked me. Would have made things easier.’

‘I didn’t want you to feel cornered if it turned out to be true.’

‘... What did I even do to deserve you, Otabek Altin.’

‘You were yourself.’

‘I don’t feel like it’s enough.’

‘I do.’

They still didn’t move. Even though their legs were starting to feel numb, even though the cold January winds were blowing right into their faces, even though the bell was ringing. They didn’t care. They only needed each other.

‘It’s not fair, though.’

‘What is ?’

‘That whole… Truth thing. There are things that I don’t know about you.’

‘What do you want to know ?’

‘Anything. As long as it’s personal.’

Maybe it was his chance to tell him. What if he didn’t feel the same ? He knew there was a possibility Yuri’s feelings were nothing like his. Maybe he was considering him his brother and friend. Otabek would respect that. He would accept it eventually. But what is he did reciprocate ? Then, what was to happen next…?

‘I’m in love with my best friend’, he simply said.

‘... Mila ? Or JJ ?’

‘Neither. Male best friend.’

‘Right. Neither of them then.’

‘He is way more beautiful than the both of them together.’

‘It’s not that complicated.’

‘He’s small. Always angry. But surprisingly soft.’

With each of his words, he could feel Yuri’s body getting more and more tense into his arms, as though he was already guessing his next words. Well, he may have had already. He was a clever young man, after all.

‘I’m sure you two would make a great couple’, he whispered.

His heart stopped. Would.

‘You would if… If he was someone who could make you happy. And I know for a fact he’s not.’

‘What do you mean… Yura ?’

But Yuri had gotten up. He smiled at him, and Otabek had to close his eyes. It wasn’t his pure, innocent smile he loved. It was a sad smile that screamed of melancholy.

‘You know… I don’t have much time before my body… changes.’

‘... Are you talking about -’

‘If only… If only time would wait for us. Then… Then I’d date you, Beka. I would give you all the happiness I would find in the world. Put it into a bottle of painted glass, and let you open it and drink a single drop from it every time you feel down. I would do that, Beka. I would listen to you composing and playing and singing, and you would look at my drawings and paintings. I would love you. I think I already do. But time never waits. Time forgets. So, I want you to forget, too.’

And just like that, he was gone.

It had been two weeks since Yuri had stopped coming to school. Otabek had been texting him relentlessly. He had replied, once. ‘Sorry.’, he had said. No one except him seemed fazed by the blonde’s sudden disappearance. Even the teachers sounded like everything was normal. He knew it wasn’t. Something was painfully wrong with that. That was the reason why he was standing in front of the faculty office door. Hesitating. He hadn’t talked to Mr. Nikiforov at all for the last three weeks. They both had been skipping class.

‘Altin ?’

Otabek turned around to face Mrs. Baranovskaya, accompanied by none other than Chairman Feltsman. He respectfully greeted the both of them.

‘Are you looking for someone, perhaps ?’

‘Mr. Nikiforov, actually.’

‘I believe he is not here today. I haven’t seen him for quite a while.’

‘He’s ill’, Chairman Feltsman calmly said.

Too calmly. When Otabek got back to his room, there was one thing he knew. It was that Viktor Nikiforov wasn’t ill, and that his absence and Yuri’s disappearance were linked.

Maybe he had drawn his conclusion too soon. Mr. Nikiforov came back the following day, as cheery and funny as always. He was even a little more extra than usual, as if something really good had happened to him. He didn’t seem disturbed at all by the fact that his brother was missing. At the end of the class, Otabek ran up straight to him.

‘Mr. Nikiforov.’

‘Oh, Otabek ! Can I help you with something ?’

‘Is Yuri okay ?’

‘Yuuri ? Yes, he is, but when have I ever told you about him ?’

‘... Huh ?’

‘I mean, I know I have been up in the clouds ever since our wedding, but -’

‘I wasn’t talking about your husband Yuuri, sir’, Otabek muttered. ‘I was talking about your younger brother. Yuri Plisetsky.’

Mr. Nikiforov’s expression didn’t change at all.

‘Who are you talking about ?’

It felt like he was falling into an abyss that had suddenly opened underneath his feet. He was being swallowed by doubt, fear, hatred. Who was he talking about…? Who else would he be talking about ?

‘I know I’m Russian, and that Plisetsky name sounds Russian as well, but not all Russians know each other you know ! Oh, sorry Otabek, I’m going to be late for my next class - Mr. Plushenko will kill me if I am, and I’d rather avoid that, you know. Well, see you tomorrow !’

He then ran off through the corridor, leaving a paralyzed Otabek on the spot. He didn’t know. He didn’t know who Yuri Plisetsky was. Had Otabek dreamed him up…? No. A single glance at his phone’s lockscreen - a picture of a blonde, smiling boy with a fluffy siberian cat in his arms - indicated him he hadn’t been dreaming. Then why was everyone acting like he never existed ? He had to know. He had to know why. Why was Viktor Nikiforov, of all people, pretending he had never existed ? And, just like that, he started conceiving a plan.

Otabek had to check for the fifth time if he hadn’t mistyped the address on his phone. But he apparently hadn’t. Earlier that week - it had now been twenty-two days since Yuri had disappeared - he had asked Mr. Nikiforov to tutor him during weekends. They were supposed to start today; but the address he gave him was… A flower shop. Yuutopia Flowers, more specifically. He nevertheless entered the store. Maybe he should buy a bouquet for the Nikiforovs ?

‘Hello’, a young, bespectacled man said as he entered. ‘Are you looking for a composition in particular ?’

‘Huh ? Oh, uh… Hello. Not… Not really, I’m not very good at flower language. But, um… It’s for a newlywed couple. Well, no, they’ve been married for almost half a year now.’

‘... Are you perhaps looking for Viktor Katsuki-Nikiforov ?’

‘How do you -’

‘I’m Yuuri Katsuki-Nikiforov’, he chuckled as he stretched out his hand to shake his. ‘Nice to meet you… Otabek, was it ? Vitya told me you would come by. He’s tutoring you, right ?’

‘Oh, I’m… I’m sorry. Yeah, that’s right.’

‘What are you apologizing for ? Anyway… Vitya is out with our dog, he should be here in just a few minutes. Come on, I’ll show you to our apartment… Nishigori, Yuuko, I’m leaving the shop to you two !’

‘You got it, buddy !’ a smiling woman answered from the counter.

Yuuri took Otabek past a door that no one would ever notice if they didn’t know it was there. They climbed the tiny, narrow stairs, only to end up in a gigantic living room. It was extremely modern, styled with black, white and blue, and Otabek immediately recognized the place. Most of Yuri’s photos of Potya had been taken there.

‘You can sit here’, Yuuri smiled as he gestured to a table. ‘Do you need anything ?’

‘I… No, thank you.’

‘Alright. I’ll be in the shop if you need anything; don’t hesitate and ask, okay ?’

‘That’s very kind of you, thank you very much.’

As Yuuri was making his way downstairs, Otabek couldn’t help himself but call him back.

‘Mr. Katsuki-Nikiforov ?’

The bespectacled man’s face instantly popped back from the staircase.

‘Yes ?’

‘Do… Do you know… What happened to Yuri Plisetsky ?’

Yuuri’s expression darkened. He knew something. Maybe he wasn’t going to hide it like his husband did.

‘I… I am in no place to tell you about it. It is… It only concerns Yurio, and Vitya.’

‘... According to Yura himself, Mr. Nikiforov has nothing to do with it.’

‘He… Doesn’t, it’s true. But… I cannot be the one to talk to you about it. I think… I can convince Vitya to tell you, alright ? You both need to. I can’t stand seeing him suffer like that because of the unnecessary weight of secrets he’s put on his shoulders.’

‘I understand. Thank you very much, sir.’

‘Please call me Yuuri. You are Yurio’s friend, aren’t you ? Since you called him Yura. He doesn’t allow a lot of people to call him that, you know. You must be special to him… If you are to this boy, then you are to me as well.’

‘That’s… Thank you, Yuuri.’

‘No problem, Otabek.’

He went downstairs.

‘So, for our next project, I’d like you all to work with Mr. Giacometti’s arts class !’ Mr. Nikiforov said with his usual heart-shaped smile. ‘My husband Yuuri came up with that idea, and I think it’s absolutely brilliant ! We will be trying to understand each other’s definition of art - visual arts, and musical arts ! It’s very simple, actually. People of the music course will have to draw, or paint if you can, the music you like the most. People of the arts course on the other hand, will have to sing something they deem fitting to their favorite painting !’

‘Sir, I can’t even draw a potato without having it look like a spaceship’, Mila said.

‘Art isn’t always about similarity and beauty ! It is about passing through a strong, a poetic message ! Just like music does, for that matter. That’s why, I want you to understand that not only is music able to create new colors, but painting itself is able to create music !’

‘Sir’, Otabek finally asked. ‘Will you be participating as well ? Because I have a challenge for you.’

And a good one, at that. He and Yuuri had been working on this little project of theirs for the past week - Yuri had disappeared for a month now.

‘You do, uh ? Then I’ll take you on any time ! What is your little challenge ?’

‘I want you to paint In Regards to Love: Agape.’

‘You… What ? Now, that’s a peculiar request…’

‘When you first made us listen to this song in class, it felt… It was incredibly powerful. And I was wondering if you could change such musical power into a painting.’

‘Gods, you have exactly gotten the hang of the subject, Otabek ! Alright then, I’ll be painting Agape ! You have two weeks to prepare, so do it well ! I also want you to write a paper about your work. No cheating, if I hear any of you has been using one of the art students’ help, you’re disqualified ! By the way, the winner gets free tickets to Disneyland.’

The room collectively shouted ‘WHAT’, before students started gathering into smaller groups to discuss their projects. Naturally, Mr. Nikiforov approached Otabek, Mila and JJ’s group.

‘So, what song have you decided to paint ?’

‘Agape’, Otabek smirked. ‘I really like that song, and it would only be fair for me to use the same subject as yours for our little… challenge.’

He was provocating him. He had seen and heard Yuri do it so many times; and he now knew why Yuri always felt so satisfied whenever he made anyone angry. It just felt good to think he had power over someone. And that he’d soon squeeze the truth out of him. He was going to find Yuri, and no one would stop him. Not even time.

‘Indeed, Otabek. I can’t wait until we compare our productions ! What about you two, Mila, Jean-Jacques ?’

‘I think I’ll be painting one of my own compositions’, Mila said pensively. ‘What do you think, sir ? Is it powerful enough ?’

‘Anything is if you see it for what it is’, Mr. Nikiforov smiled. ‘Jean-Jacques ?’

‘I’m not quite sure… Still wondering if I should choose Partizan Hope or Sleeping at Last’s Saturn.’

‘Saturn, uh… You would have to paint time, and love. This song is really powerful and difficult, but… On the other hand, it could make for a great painting.’

‘I couldn’t help but ask, you to say it all again; I tried to write it down, but I could never find a pen…’, Otabek hummed. He had made Yuri listen to it, and he absolutely adored it.

‘I’d give anything to hear, you say it one more time; that the universe was made, just to be seen by my eyes....’, Mr. Nikiforov sang. ‘There is someone I once knew who really loved this song.’

He left their table, and Otabek’s confused gaze followed him. Someone he once knew ? Who loved ? Past tense. Could he be talking about Yuri ? Had something happened to him ? No, Yuuri would have told him if he was dead… He would, right ? Obviously he would. There was no point in freaking out. But he couldn’t help it. Yuri wasn’t dead. Then why past tense ? Something happened. He knew that much. He knew nothing else and it was slowly killing him. He didn’t even see JJ and Mila’s worried looks until the redhead slapped him.

‘Awake, now ?’ she growled.

‘... Mila. Why did you -’

‘To wake you up. And tell us just what the fuck is happening to you.’

‘You know perfectly well what’s happening. And none of you has even tried finding out the truth. You just kept it with the teachers’ little act.’

And then, realization hit him. That Mila knew why Viktor and Yuri had been arguing. She knew why Yuri had disappeared. He took her by an arm, and almost had to drag her to the corridor to talk.

‘Why were they arguing, that day ?’

‘Otabek, I promised I -’

‘Yuri’s disappeared. Mila, the boy I love has disappeared and you know why he did.’

‘I don’t -’

‘You do, you were ready to beat him up to get him to apologize to Viktor.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous, Otabek, I would never have beaten him up…’

‘Don’t change the topic.’

‘... I can’t, Otabek. This isn’t something I can tell you. I don’t have the right to.’

‘Because Mr. Nikiforov forbid you to do it ?’

‘Because it wouldn’t be right for me to.’

‘Mila, I swear that if you don’t tell me I will -’

‘Will what ? Go ahead, say it, you will what ?!’

He didn’t answer. She stormed back into the classroom. Otabek went the opposite way to get some water onto his face. What was he doing ? He had threatened his best friend. Her, of all people, who he’d been counting on for two years now. He had threatened her, and he suddenly realized he wasn’t controlling anything anymore. He was nothing but a mess of contradictory feelings.

Finally. The day of the exhibition.

Yuri had gone missing for a month and two weeks now. And today was the day Otabek would get his answers. He knew he would. Viktor would never be able to keep his mouth shut after seeing his painting. He had worked so hard on it; Yuuri even helped him - and Isabella too, although no one should know about that, otherwise, he would be disqualified. Winning these tickets didn’t sound bad at all. Once he’d have found Yuri, they’d go together. Maybe he’d finally tell him about that ‘time’ thing he had mentioned.

‘Welcome, everyone, to our very first Music and Art joint project ! I do hope you will enjoy it, because we sure did while singing those !’ Mr. Giacometti said in the microphone.

‘Well, everyone did their best, there is no reason for us not to enjoy all these beautiful productions !’ Mr. Nikiforov answered. ‘Now, shall we start with the music, or the art students ?’

‘The floor is yours, dear.’

‘My, how gentlemanly ! So, let’s see… First in alphabetical order would be… Altin, Otabek ! So, what song did you choose, why, and what have you painted ?’

The silver-haired man gave him the mic as Otabek climbed onto the stage. Behind him, JJ and Isabella were putting his painting on its easel.

‘The song I have chosen is… In Regards to Love: Agape. I… From the very moment I heard it, it felt special. Gracious and yet, powerful. Beautiful and enthralling, but nothing superficial. It goes far, far beyond that. And that’s why all I could imagine as I was listening was…’

He turned around, and walked to the easel before pulling on the white sheet covering the painting. Golden hair. Feathery white wings. Pale green eyes. It wasn’t perfect. It had many, many flaws. The colors were a bit dull on some crucial points and the lighting wasn’t exactly on point. But it was beautiful nevertheless. It took the whole audience’s breath away.

‘Yuri’, Mr. Nikiforov muttered.

He, for one, was mesmerized by the painting. He slowly walked to it. His fingers graced it surface, tracing the lines of a face he hadn’t seen in more than a month. A face he would most likely never see again. A tear rolled down his cheek. Another. The next thing Otabek Altin knew, was that Viktor Katsuki-Nikiforov was crying his heart out before his painting.

‘I can’t’, he sobbed as Mr. Giacometti was trying to comfort him. ‘I can’t. He can’t, Otabek. He can’t go like that.’

‘Go ? Where to ?’

‘Far. Very far away. A land we will all reach eventually. But it’s too soon, Otabek ! It’s too soon for him to go there ! He can’t, and I can’t, and I could do nothing. I could do nothing to even slow him down, he insisted to come everyday, to work everyday like a normal boy would, to have friends and fall in love… Because he did, you know. He did fall in love. He fell in love with life. And then with you. And all of a sudden he…’

‘Where is he, Mr. Nikiforov ? Where is he ?!’

‘The hospital. Room 112. Don’t go. It will only hurt you more.’

Otabek didn’t even hear him. The next minute, he was onto his motorcycle, driving under a blinding winter sun, as if the star was mocking him.

He was there. But not really there. Laying in a bed with white covers. His head tilted to the side. Completely unable to move. Only his green eyes were as bright as they used to be. Everything else was unrecognizable. His soft, golden hair now looked so thin and dull. His fair, smooth skin had gotten even paler - if it was possible. His already skinny limbs looked like the mere blowing of the wind could break him in half. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. How could he not have realized that earlier ?! His pale skin, far too pale to be natural. The way he refused to come to the gym, because his muscles wouldn’t have been able to take it. His appointments at the hospital. His part time job, merely four stops away from said hospital. Him not being able to pose as a dynamic model, on the very day he had met and talked to him for the first time. Everything made sense now and he had been blind, blind, blind all the time.

‘Yura.’

He couldn’t answer, of course. He was being kept alive by mere machines. He couldn’t talk. He had thoughts. Most certainly beautiful ones, like everything he ever was to him. But no one would ever be able to hear them. He wished he could. They both wished they could.

‘I’m here, Yura. I... I’m so sorry, Yura. I’m so sorry I’ve been selfish. I didn’t even... I would have fought with you, you know. We would have gone through that together.’

We did. We did. I was your soldier. I’ve simply fallen on the battlefield. You already did a lot.

‘I did nothing’, Otabek sobbed.

You did so much.

‘I did nothing. I didn’t even know.’

You were my friend. The fourth person to accept me for who I am. But the first I’ve ever fallen in love with.

‘I claimed I love you, and I still could do nothing.’

There was nothing to be done. I was destined to be shattered into pieces anyway.

‘I’m so sorry. I wasn’t there for these six weeks. Six weeks, damnit, six weeks, it feels so short when you say it that way but now I realize how much... How much time has taken from us... This is what you meant when you said your body would change. And I was blinded... By my own sadness but who am I to even pretend to be hurt ?’

Stop apologizing. I love you. Beka. Can you please make my dream come true ?

Otabek sat on the hospital room’s chair, his fingers lightly brushing Yuri’s. He wondered if he could do anything for that boy. Five months. He had been in love with him for five months. He still was. Those five little months meant the world to him. They meant life to Yuri. And then, he followed the blonde’s pale green gaze, that fell upon a sketchbook. He stood up, opened it. Portraits. The first few were Viktor and Yuuri. One of them most likely drawn at their wedding. Then, there were some sketches of Potya’s fluffy face. Next up, some studies of Yuri’s own face. And then, him. Otabek. He was everywhere. On every page. Realistic style, anime style, cartoon style. Charcoal, watercolor, felt-tip. He turned to Yuri. There was a pencil on the nightstand. He gently took the pen, and put it in Yuri’s hand. His own closed around the blonde’s, and they started drawing. A bottle, labeled, happiness.

#yoi #yuri on ice #otayuri #otabek altin #yuri plisetsky #otabek's pov #mila babicheva #jean-jacques leroy #milasara #jjbella #isabella yang #viktuuri #viktor nikiforov #yuuri katsuki #angst

10 notes · View notes

tzudism · 7 years

Text

Memory Lane: Maybe It’s Better

Bonus Chapter: Mimo

“Almost there honey! Keep pushing!”

“The baby is almost out Mrs. Myoui! One more push! There we go! It’s a girl!”

My parents said my screams were so loud when I came out that they thought they were in for trouble when I was born. Yet, somehow I ended up like this, as quiet as a mouse. My parents keep telling me that I need to speak up louder that way people will know what I want to say. But that was the problem. It’s not that I’m not loud enough, it’s more like you’re just not listening. One day I was coming home from middle school, and I was a little late because my teacher was telling me about how great I did dancing for the school play “The Nutcracker” the previous week and showed me a program that sounded really interesting.

“I really think you have a talent for this Mina. If you start developing your skills now, there is no doubt in my mind that you can be a beautiful dancer in the future.”

The thought of that really peaked my interest. I always enjoyed dancing in my room and trying to copy what people were doing on shows or online, but I never thought about actually pursuing it. As soon as she finished explaining, I ran straight home to tell my parents about it, but they weren’t having it. I told them the reasons why I was late, and about the dance program, but all they were focused on was how I was late and that I was only in my first year of middle school and that I could’ve been hurt. They didn’t even take one look at the pamphlet my teacher gave me. I don’t think raising my volume would’ve affected the outcome of that day. In the end, I never went to that program. In all my life there have been only two people who ever really listened to what I have to say. The first is my childhood friend Momo. We met in kindergarten and we’ve been inseparable since. She loved dancing just as much as I did. Momo was more into hip hop and I was more of a ballet type of dancer, but that didn’t harm our friendship at all, as matter of fact we taught each other stuff we learned as we grew up. A while after that day arguing with my parents, Momo and I were walking around after school, and we saw a rhythmic gymnastics tournament going on at the gym. I heard rhythmic gymnastics had a lot of the same principles that ballet had, but of course they were different, after all gymnastics was a sport. I was intrigued nonetheless.

“Hey, do you want to check that out?” I said.

“What? Why?” Momo questioned, “I thought we were going to go eat?”

“Oh c’mon please? Look they’re selling nachos inside.” I say pointing at the sign.

“Ooh nachos!” She said sounding content.

As soon as I entered inside the gym, I could feel adrenaline rush throughout my body. I saw all the different girls dancing and throwing balls and batons in the air and catching them with zero effort, not even looking, and twirling around ribbons making them look like dragons soaring through the sky.

“I want to do this.”

“Hmm? Mwhat wash thaf?” Momo said with a mouthful of nachos.

“This, rhythmic gymnastics, I want to do this!” I said aloud.

“Woah Mina, you’re actually speaking at the average person’s volume. You really must be serious.” She teased as she wiped cheese off her face with a smile.

“Shut up, and yes I am serious.” I was determined to become a rhythmic gymnast.

After the competition ended, I went to our school’s coach and asked how I could join. He handed me an application and as soon as I went home, punctually this time around, I explained to my parents how I felt when I saw the performances at the gym, and how I wanted to be able to do the same. And for once in my life they actually really listened to me, and not only that, they let me join too. From that day forward rhythmic gymnastics was my only focus. Two years later, Momo and I were walking home together from our respective clubs, Momo in dance and me in rhythmic gymnastics.

“Mina! Let’s get ice cream! I’m hungry!” She exclaims.

“You’re always hungry Momo.” Then my own stomach growls, “Oh umm, but ice cream does sound pretty good.”

We walk over to the convenience store nearby and we both buy some vanilla ice cream cones.

“Momo slow down you’re going to get a brain-“

“AHHHH!”

“- freeze…”

Momo was older than I was, but sometimes she acts like a child and I can’t help but take care of her like she is one. After her brain freeze passes, she goes back to munching on the ice cream cone not having learned her lesson, but this time nothing happens thankfully.

“Gosh, Mina you eat so slow.”

“No, I eat at the speed of the average human being, you just eat way too fast. Look you can’t even keep track of where all the ice cream goes. You have some here dripping down your cheek, I’ll wipe it off.”

I move in closer to wipe off the ice cream and as soon as I do, I get this weird feeling coming from Momo. I look up and see her staring into my eyes. This was a strange feeling, which I don’t think I’ve ever felt before.

“Mina listen I think I…I think…I might…”

“What is it Momo? We’re best friends you can tell me anything.”

“Right…best friends! Oh of course we are!”

“Yes Momo best friends haha, so what were you saying?”

“Oh umm, I think I might still be craving another ice cream. Can we go back and get another?” She smiled faintly.

Momo seemed a little off that day, but I figured she was just really hungry. Every once in a while, that year things like that would happen again. Momo and I would get close, Momo would look like she had something to say, and then it would end up being about food. And every time that happened I would get this weird sensation, and whenever I asked Momo what was on her mind, and it always ended up being about food, for some reason I felt slightly disappointed. The next year, it was our first year of high school. I was extremely excited because I would be able to compete at gymnastic competitions at the national level now, that is if I was good enough. I was pretty confident in my skills at this point. I had been training for about three years now and I won quite a few medals back in middle school. But that was then, high school was supposed to be on a whole new level. Luckily, I still had Momo by my side to keep me company. I found it amazing how we’ve been able to stay together since kindergarten. Momo herself has been keeping up with her dancing, I would say she’s the best dancer in the state, but don’t take my word for it, all the medals and trophies she’s won herself can prove it. When we came into high school quite a few people knew about us already. Mostly because we’ve both been doing competitions since middle school and frankly we won most of them. Since we’ve always been together there was this rumor going around that we were the Dynamic Dancing Duo of the school, and we were only freshman. I entered a lot of competitions in my freshman year, purely out of excitement, but I didn’t expect high school studies to be so hard. Some competitions I would place first, but when school got rough there were times where I wouldn’t place at all. My grades where shaky too, it was really hard to go all in on both school and dancing, so I tried to slow down a bit after midterms. At the end of the school year I had one last competition, but it was right after finals. My parents said that if I fail any of my finals they would pull me out of the competition and possibly pull me out of rhythmic gymnastics in general. I didn’t want that so I put all my focus on the finals coming up. I aced them all. As soon as finals passed, I put in as much practice as I could. I felt confident that I was going to place first this time. Momo meanwhile also had a competition of her own. So we were both really busy and couldn’t hang out often. Coincidentally both our competitions were on the same day. So we promised each other that we would hang out together with our medals as soon as we won. The day of the competition I woke up to a text.

“My competition got moved a couple hours, so I’ll come by and cheer you on Mina! Good luck little penguin!”

Momo will be able to come see me? Now I really have to win. I take a deep breath and get ready for what lied ahead. I arrived at the venue with the team and this was probably the biggest gym I have ever been in. This was an important competition because first and second place qualified you for nationals. Of course, I was going for first place. As soon as we entered the gym, I see Cheng Xiao. We’ve been trading places between first and second the past few years. Well, except this year because of school. Oh, is she coming closer?

“Hey there Mina, are you prepared this time around? You barely placed third last time, and you didn’t even place at all the competition before that.”

“Just worry about yourself Cheng Xiao.”

“Hmph well I hope you are, I miss these things being actual contests.”

She walks away and I take another deep breath as we enter into the main stage. I sit down and listen to some music to calm my nerves. I’ve been doing this for a long time, and I’ve won my fair share, but I still get nervous before every competition. I’ve never been able to compete on a national level, and to be able to on my first year of high school would be amazing. Suddenly, someone wraps their arms around my shoulder.

“Hey Mina! How you doing?”

I look over my shoulder to see who it is.

“Oh Momo, I’m so glad you’re here, I am so nervous right now. This is the biggest stage I have ever performed on and I really want to qualify for Nationals and I haven’t been doing well lately and-“

“Mina calm down. You’re putting way too much pressure on yourself. Why don’t you try simplifying things for a bit?”

“What? How do I do that?”

“Why don’t you do what I do? Right before I go on stage, I find someone cute watching in the stands, and I tell myself that nothing else matters, but I’m going to make them a fan of me. I dance for that person and nothing else matters. Then if at the end of my performance, I see that person smiling or clapping for me, then I’ve done my job.”

“Maybe I’ll try it, does it really work?”

“Yupp! You got this little penguin.”

“Thanks you big raccoon.”

“Ugh can you stop calling me a raccoon, it’s so not cute.”

“But you call me penguin all the time!”

“That’s because you actually look like a penguin! You even walk like one! I, on the other hand, look nothing like a raccoon!”

I grab my phone and show her reflection at her face.

“Oh…ok maybe a little.”

“Hey Mina, it’s time to gather up, sorry Momo you’re going to have to leave now.” My coach says.

“Alrighty then, hey Mina I’ll be cheering for you!”

“There’s no screams allowed in this gym, if you’re too loud they’ll kick you out.” My coach glares.

“Yeah yeah I get it.”

I smile as I watch Momo wave as she walks backwards towards the stands where the audience sits. The competition starts and I’m set to go last. Oh great. I sit and watch as I see great performances from people like Yuju and Yein. Soon enough it’s Cheng Xiao’s turn. She’s using the ball just like I am. This makes me worry even more. If she does really well, which I’m sure she will, people are going to have higher expectations of me when it’s my turn. I watch carefully, as she starts up her performance. I can’t help but leave my mouth wide open as she performs because she’s gotten even better than she was the last time we competed, and she won first. There was one move where she left the ball between her calf and her thigh and flipped over and it left the crowd in awe, including me. When she finished her performance the entire audience filled the gym with applause, and I was among them. How was I supposed to top that?

Next up, Mina Myoui. Once again, next up, Mina Myoui.

Oh god. My heart starts beating faster and faster. Then I remember what Momo told me earlier. I look into the stands to find someone cute.

“This is so stupid.” I thought to myself.

“You got this Mina!!”

I turn to the voice and its Momo screaming from the top bench in the crowd. She then ducks down and hides her face so security doesn’t see. I can’t help but giggle as I see my idiot friend making a fool of herself. As I keep looking in her direction I notice that Momo styled her hair different than usual, probably because she had her own competition later that day. She curled the ends of her hair and I enjoyed the way they bounced and swayed as she moved her head around looking to make sure security hasn’t seen her. Momo looked cute today.

“Maybe I’ll dance for Momo.”

I take another deep breath and head towards the stage. Earlier in the practice stage, I messed up and dropped the ball on my final move. I hope that doesn’t happen again. I shake my head and look at Momo. She smiles and I smile back at her.

“I’ll make Momo my fan today.”

The music starts and I begin my routine. Everything goes smoothly, and well to be honest I’m doing even better than when I practiced. The ball didn’t just feel like a prop I was using, at this moment it felt like the ball and I were the same. Now it was time for the final move where I throw the ball in the air and spin onto the floor and catch it, where I messed up earlier. I throw the ball into the air with no fear, spin onto the floor and extend my hands out, and the ball lands onto my hands and I set it down and strike a pose and smile. I did it. I really did it! I stand up and run to my coach and give him a high five. Then I look into the stands and look for Momo. I find her and she’s standing and clapping and screaming out my name. My heart begins to pound and I’m smiling from ear to ear.

It’s now time to announce the placements, everyone please be silent.

The moment of truth.

In the third place is…Yein Jung.

Applause arises for Yein as she takes the stage to accept her medal.

In second place and the first person to be sent to Nationals is…Mina Myoui.

Wait…second place? I head over to the stage and accept my medal and smile. If I’m second place that means…

Finally, for first place and the next person to be sent to Nationals is…Cheng Xiao.

Cheng Xiao comes to the stage and accepts her medal, along with a bouquet of flowers. After the photographers leave I shake Yein’s hand and she tells me to kill it at Nationals.

“Hey Mina.”

I turn around and Cheng Xiao has a smile on her face.

“You really did bring it this time. I was scared you were actually going to beat me. Who knows, maybe at Nationals you just might.”

“You watch Cheng Xiao, I’ll definitely get you at Nationals.”

We smile and shake each other’s hands and walk off the stage. I head into the tunnel and I hear someone running towards me screaming, and I already know who it is.

“MINAAA!!!! You were amazing! Those judges don’t know what they’re doing, you totally deserved first place!”

“Thanks Momo, but I know when I lost. Even I have to admit Cheng Xiao’s performance was brilliant. The only way I could’ve won if she made a mistake and she didn’t. But you know what? That’s ok, we both made it into Nationals and over there on an even bigger stage I’ll take her down.”

“Wow Mina, you have so much confidence! I like it haha. Did you do what I told you?”

“What do you mean?”

“To find someone cute and dance for them, did you find anybody?” she smirks.

“Yeah I did actually. She’s REALLY cute too.” I tease.

“Ohhh a she huh? Who was it? Do I know her?”

“I will never tell!” I scream as I run away.

“Hey! Mina! That’s not fair, I taught you the trick you should at least tell me who you used it on!”

“Nope! Never!”

“You’re at least going to go watch me later right!?”

“Of course! I’m going to get dressed then go watch your competition!”

“Ok! Let me know when you get there and I’ll go find you!”

We wave goodbye and I head towards the locker room to get dressed. After the bus drops us off back at school, I head over to my mom who’s waiting for me in her car.

“You were wonderful Mina! You deserved first place, I’m not just saying that as your mother but as your number one fan.” She says with a smile.

“I know mom, thank you. I made it to Nationals anyway. I’ll get the gold spot there, where it really matters.”

“Do you know when that is?”

“It’s in six months, so we have half a year to prepare our routines, which is good, I have to get a lot of practice in if I want to beat Cheng Xiao.”

“Well your father and I will be rooting for you all the way. By the way he says he’s sorry he couldn’t make this one, work called him in last minute.”

“Yeah it’s ok, I understand.”

“But I told him you made it to Nationals and he is so proud of you, he said he’ll make sure to attend that competition even if he loses his job.”

“Wow ok he doesn’t have to go that far haha.”

“Oh you know your father he likes to exaggerate. So, off to Momo’s competition?”

“Yes please!”

Momo’s competition was not on as big a scale as mine, but the venue was still pretty big. No one was going to go to Nationals or anything like that here, just a simple winner take all. My mom drops me off at the entrance as she goes to find parking. I run inside and text Momo that I’m here.

“Mina! Over here!”

I turn around and see Momo in a black crop top and jeans with a flannel at her waist. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail with only her bangs loose. She looked totally different from when she came to watch me.

“Why did you keep your bangs? You didn’t want to tie them up either? They won’t get in the way?”

“No, I’ll be fine. Besides I think I look mean without my bangs.”

“What do you mean by that!?” I laugh.

“Momo! The competition is about to start, c’mon!” shouts Momo’s instructor.

“Let’s go, I saved you a seat next to me backstage, my parents will text yours and they can sit together too.”

Momo grabs my hand and we head backstage.

“Are you sure I’m allowed back here?”

“Yeah of course, I made sure to ask beforehand. Look, our seats are right there.”

As soon as we sit down the lights dim in the auditorium and an announcer comes out and the spotlight shines on him.

“Welcome everyone! We have a wonderful show for you today with many wonderful dancers ready to compete for the top spot!”

“How many people are competing today?” I ask Momo.

“Five people are competing today.”

“Oh wow, when are you going up?”

“I’m up fourth I think.”

The announcer finishes up his opening statement and starts to introduce the first contestant.

“First up we have Seulgi Kang! Everyone give her a round of applause!”

I’ve been to many of Momo’s competitions before and Seulgi was always a constant presence. She was older than us so she had a lot more experience, and it showed in her performance. When Momo first beat her I was scared she would be offended, but she was very nice and humble and congratulated Momo. If there was anyone that I respected here it would definitely be Seulgi. Her performance today was amazing as usually, she showed a lot of improvement that even someone in a different field like me can see the work she put in. When the music ends everyone in the audience gives a loud applause.

“Wow what an amazing first performance! Let’s see if our next performer can top that!”

Wow, no pressure.

“Everyone give it up for Chungha Kim!”

Chungha? I don’t think I’ve ever seen her before at any of Momo’s other competitions.

“Is she new? I don’t recognize her.” I ask Momo.

“Yeah I’ve never seen her before either. This should be fun, it’s been a while since someone new came to compete.”

Chungha takes the stage with a smile, but as soon as the music turns out her expression changes in an instant. Her moves hit hard and each of them were precise and without a single flaw. I don’t know how to explain it, she just knew what she wanted to do and without a single hesitation she just did it. Her movements were very fluid and seamless. It was clear that Seulgi’s strong first performance didn’t faze her one bit. Before I knew it the music stops and I’m lost. It’s over already? I kind of wanted her to keep going.

“Chungha Kim everyone! Give her another round of applause! Simply stunning! Now for our third performer today, we have Sia Yoo!”

“I told you to just call me YooA!”

The audience laughs as the girl glares at the announcer.”

“Terribly sorry, may I present to you ladies and gentlemen YooA!”

YooA composes herself as she walks onto the stage. YooA’s way of dancing was very different from Seulgi and Chungha. YooA was all smiles and used that to her advantage. She winked and flipped her hair at all the guys in the audience and that definitely caught their attention. But she wasn’t just flirting, YooA had serious skill too. She moved in perfect synchronization with every beat, not even a millisecond off. Suddenly YooA focused her attention to the girls in the audience and you could even see and hear some of them swooning over her performance. Now that I think about it, as soon as it was over I actually think more girls were screaming than guys.

“Wow what a performance! Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?”

Man this announcer is cheesy.

“Now for our fourth performer, and returning champion, Momo Hirai!”

Finally it was Momo’s turn. She gets up from her seat and heads towards center stage. I wave my hands in the air and flail them around, I wanted to scream Momo’s name, but in all honesty I doubt I would’ve been loud enough, so I just kept flailing my arms. Suddenly, Momo turns in my direction and winks at me. My mind goes back to when Momo told her about the trick she does to calm her nerves. Is she going to dance for me? No way, right? I assure myself it wasn’t me after all Momo and I are just friends. Although, I did choose to dance for her during my own performance. But, that was just a spur of the moment thing. Maybe it was the same for her? Before I can put any more thought into it the music starts and I revert my attention back to the stage. Momo gets into position and her facial expression changes with the music, almost similar to Chungha, except Momo didn’t change to a simple serious expression, but rather she changed her personality to suit the music playing. Momo has been like this ever since she started dancing. On a normal day, Momo is this hungry little goofball, but as soon as she stands on that stage and the music starts playing, she transforms into something different, yet she’s still Momo. Her moves in perfect sync with the music, her expressions affected everyone in the audience, including me, sometimes it felt as if she was staring only at me and I suddenly had this odd nostalgic feeling that I couldn’t quite pin down where I felt this before. I shake my head and focus back on Momo who is setting fire on the stage. The whole crowd screams at her every move. I knew how hard Momo worked for this performance, even though she’s the returning champ she didn’t slack off, she practiced every day as if she was coming back from a loss. Her performance ended and the audience cheers loud and gives her a standing ovation. I look to my left and see a girl biting her nails. Oh right there was one more contestant. Who made this arrangement that she had to go right after the reigning champion? In what world is that fair? Momo makes her way back to her seat after she bows in front of the audience. She high fives her instructor and sits down next to me.

“You did great! You were definitely the best performer today! Actually that might’ve been the best performance I’ve seen you do ever!”

“Thanks Mina, but that’s not true, I messed up a few times in the beginning. I just hope nobody noticed.”

“Well if you did, I know I didn’t notice anything, and I’ve watched you practice every day.”

“Remarkable performance! Nothing less from our returning champion! And now for our final performer of the night! Lalisa Manoban!”

“Just Lisa is fine, thank you.”

“Oh my mistake, Lisa it is! Everyone a quick round of applause for Lisa!”

This guy should really ask what the contestants want to be called before he introduces them, this is the second time today.

“Hey, do you know her? I don’t think I know her either.”

“Oh Lisa? Yeah I know her, she doesn’t compete often, but when she does she kills it. Being after the reigning champion won’t faze her one bit.”

“Really? I saw her biting her nails earlier, during your performance.”

“Oh that? Haha, that’s just a bad habit of hers.”

The music comes on and Lisa just bursts out on the stage. Was this really the same girl who was biting her nails earlier? She moves so quickly, yet so precise. She was moving with purpose and she had this, for lack of better word, swag about her. I regret thinking that Momo made her nervous, because she looked right at home on stage. I wonder, why she doesn’t compete that often?

“Why doesn’t she compete more often, she’s amazing!?”

“Apparently her parents are really strict. They call her house ‘The Dungeon’. She can only compete when her friends manage to sneak her out.”

Her parents prevent her from performing and she can still dance like that? Lisa is something else. Soon her performance ends and some of the audience give Lisa a standing ovation as well. She sure deserved it, I wish the rest of the audience stood up as well.

“Amazing! Another applause for Lisa everyone!”

This time all of the audience gave Lisa a standing ovation. Lisa had a huge smile on her face, she seemed so happy.

“Have the judges reached their decision? You have? Wonderful! Can I have the card now please? Ahh thank you. Now for third place!”

The room was silent, waiting for the first name to be called.

“Welcome back to the stage everyone, Chungha Kim!”

Chungha walks to the stage with a smile and waves to the audience who give her loud cheers.

“Now for second place, please clap for La…Lisa everyone!”

Lisa covers her face in shock as she heads up on stage. For someone who barely competes, due to strict parents, I’m sure she was overjoyed. She takes the second place trophy and waves it in the air and jumps around. Three other girls cheered louder than anyone else, I’m sure those were her friends that snuck her out here.

“And now for first place, ladies and gentleman for the second year in a row I present to you Momo Hirai!”

Momo gets up and has the biggest smile on her face. I think I see tears welling up in her eyes. She wipes them off and heads towards the stage. She grabs her trophy and photographers take pictures of the three as they hold their trophies in the air. I feel so happy for Momo that I’m flailing my arms in the air again. This I start screaming Momo’s name and she turns to me and smiles and shakes her trophy in the air. She actually heard me? Momo for some reason was always able to hear my voice no matter how loud it was or how low I spoke. Momo came running off the stage and ran straight to me. She jumps up into the air and I catch her and we spin around laughing.

“I did it Mina I did it!” her smile was so bright, I thought my heart was going to melt.

“Momo I’m so proud of you! I can’t believe you won this award, not once but twice!”

“Me neither! You know what this means right?”

“Sleep over at your house?” I say with a smile.

“Yupp!” She smiles back.

Later that day, my mom drops me off at Momo’s front door. I knock, but the door is open.

“I’m here!” I say poking my head out the door.

I see Momo running around getting stuff ready.

“What are you doing?” I laugh to myself.

“Oh you’re here! Oh my gosh did I leave the door open!?”

“Yeah you did haha, what’s going? You’re a mess Momo.”

“I was supposed to clean the house before you came over, but as soon as I got home I knocked out. I literally just woke up ten minutes ago.”

“You know you don’t have to clean up your whole house, besides I’ve been here plenty of times Momo, I’ve seen this place at its worst haha.”

“You know what, you’re right, I’m too lazy to keep doing this anyway. Wanna eat?” She says with a smile, “All this cleaning made me hungry!”

“You’ve only been cleaning for ten minutes.”

“Yeah that’s ten minutes I could’ve spent making and eating food Mina duh.”

Well, she got me there. Momo orders her favorite jokbal and jajangmyeon from the Korean restaurant across the block.

“Mina why aren’t you eating? The foof if amafimg!” She says stuffing her face.

“I don’t know, I just feel like it’s missing something.”

I head to the fridge and look around.

“Ah ha!”

I grab a bottle and sit back down. I look up and Momo is looking at me strangely.

“You know Mina, you don’t have to eat ketchup with everything right?”

“Hey, don’t judge me, I can’t help my love for ketchup, it makes everything better.”

I smile and pour ketchup all over the jokbal. Yes, this is exactly what I needed. I grab a glass and fill it with water, as soon as I sit down Momo is looking at me strangely again.

“Ok, what is it now?”

“How can you drink water?”

“Well you know, I kind of have to, since I enjoy being alive?”

“But it has no taste! We have soda in the fridge you know?” Momo then chugs down a coke and goes to the fridge to grab another.

“Water does have taste!” I refute.

“Ok, what does it taste like then?”

“It…well…water tastes like…water!”

“Mina you’re supposed to be the smart one.”

“Shut up, besides you know there’s water in soda right?”

“That’s good then, so I’ll sit here and stay alive drinking my soda, which has taste by the way.” She smiles proudly and takes a sip of her soda.

“I…just…whatever.” I pour more ketchup on my jokbal defeated.

After we eat, we sit down and binge kdramas that we missed out on because of school and practicing for the competitions. We decided to watch ‘Weight Lifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo’. I laugh every time Bok Joo and her friends are eating because it reminds me of Momo way too much. One of the characters hit a little close to home because she was a rhythmic gymnast like me. It showed her and all the other gymnasts struggling to keep their weight steady for competitions.

“Mina, you don’t put yourself through that kind of training do you?” Momo looks at me worried. “You’re not going to go the bathroom and throw up after this, are you?”

“No of course not, I learned to manage my eating well enough that I can enjoy eating delicious food like this every once in a while and not feel guilty. Don’t worry, Momo I don’t starve myself.”

“Ok good!” Momo smiles looking content.

It was late at night by the time we finished the series, Momo and I had tears running down our eyes.

“They’re so cute!” Momo cries.

“I know! I love them so much!” I cry back.

“Hey Mina?” Momo asks as she wipes her tears.

“Yeah? What’s up?” I sniff.

“Have you ever…been in love with anybody?”

“What? Momo you’re my best friend, if I was in love you would be the first one I would tell. And to answer your question, no I’ve never been in love. I’m too focused on school and rhythmic gymnastics to even think about dating.”

“Well…what if you didn’t have to date?”

“What do you mean?”

Before I knew it Momo leans in and kisses me on the lips. I was so surprised, but I didn’t back away. I just froze and stayed still.

“Mina I think I’m in love with you.”

“You…you think?”

“You know that trick I taught you earlier today? Where you pick someone cute and dance for them? Well, ever since I started performing, I’ve always been performing for you. Only you.”

“So earlier today, when you performed…that was for me too?”

“Yupp.”

So I wasn’t imagining it.

“Look Mina, I don’t want to lose you as a friend, but I don’t think I can hold back my feelings anymore.”

“I don’t want to lose you either Momo, I don’t know what to say. I’m not ready for a relationship right now.”

“That’s why I asked, what if you didn’t have to date?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“We don’t have to say that we’re dating or anything like that…” Momo comes in closer, “…just if every once in a while, if you don’t mind, I can do this with you, I’ll be happy with just that.” Momo kisses me again, this time she doesn’t back off, instead she puts her arms around me and I don’t think about anything, I just go along with it.

What do I do? I don’t want to hurt Momo, she’s my best friend. She’s my oldest friend, she’s always been there for me, and if I lose her I’ll lose the only person that has ever understood me better than anyone else. I back up a little from Momo.

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do it for so long. Was I smothering you?”

“No, it’s fine. Momo you’re my best friend, I’m not sure how I feel about this right now, but I want you to be happy, and if this will make you happy then I’ll do it.”

“Mina wait, stop.”

I didn’t expect Momo to have such as serious look, I thought she’d be happy.

“I don’t want you to do this because you feel like you have to, or because you think you’ll lose me. Mina you will never lose me, no matter what. I want you to do this if you want to, not because you have to. If you don’t like this we don’t have to do it, its fine.”

Momo begins to stand up, but I grab her arm and bring her closer to me.

“I never said I didn’t like it.” I lean in closer and I kiss her.

Ever since that night, Momo and I start secretly kissing everywhere we went. Sometimes we would plan it out, other times we would surprise each other. It was mostly Momo doing the surprise kisses, I was never bold enough to kiss her in public, especially at school. The only time I had enough confidence to surprise her was when we at each other’s houses. I still wasn’t ready for a real relationship. After all, there was only one month left until Nationals, and we’re just about to start our sophmore year, I didn’t have time for a real relationship, but if it was just doing this much and if it was with Momo, then I could handle that. In fact, I looked forward to it. But then one day, I was walking with Momo after school and I noticed people staring at us as we walked by.

“Do you know why they’re staring at us Momo?”

“Apparently a few people saw us kissing during vacation, rumors are going around that we went even further than that too.”

“WHAT!?” I scream out loud, but no one seemed to notice.

“Was that you trying to scream?” Momo laughs.

“I DID scream, what are we going to do? What if these rumors reach the teachers and then they call my parents?”

“Mina, you’re over-exaggerating, rumors hardly ever reach teachers. Besides, this will blow over soon enough. Like last week I heard a rumor that Nayeon has bunny teeth because she likes to eat rabbits. Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?”

“Well in some places eating rabbits is considered a delicacy.” I retort.

“Ok, but can you see Nayeon having rabbit teeth BECAUSE she eats them?”

“Ok, yeah that part is stupid.”

“Rumors will come and go, don’t worry too much.”

“Ok, I guess you’re right. Hey, don’t forget I have an exhibition competition to practice for Nationals in two weeks. You’ll be there right?”

“Will you be dancing for me?” Momo teases.

“Only if you’re there, otherwise I’ll dance for some other cute girl in the stands. I mean it Momo!”

“Well then now, I HAVE to be there!” she jokes.

Two weeks later, I head turn to the stands and Momo is nowhere to be found.

“Mina!”

I turn around hoping its Momo, but it’s not.

“Oh it’s just you Sana.”

I met Sana this year, we have history class together. She’s fun to hang around with so we’ve gotten pretty close.

“Hey that’s rude of you! I come to support my friend and this is how she treats me? Hmph!”

“I’m sorry, I just thought you were Momo is all, I can’t find her anywhere.”

“Did you text or call her?”

‘My phone is in my bag, which is in the locker room. I can’t go back for it now, it’s too late. I thought she’d be here, she promised me she would.”

“Oh well, I’m sure she’ll be here. You two are two peas in a pod.”

I raise my eyebrow at that odd remark.

“Umm I guess?”

“Anyway I’ll be up in the stands rooting for Mina! Don’t worry I’m sure Momo will make it in time!”

I hope so. I’m the last person to go up, after Cheng Xiao and Yuju. This was just exhibition, so only two other people showed up. Of course Cheng Xiao showed up, because she couldn’t resist going back up against me and having the chance to beat me again. Yuju came just to try to prove to herself that she was better than the last performance she gave, where she didn’t even place. Yuju went up first, last time she performed she messed up, but this time around she performed perfectly and elegantly. When the music stopped she had a huge smile and looked content. It was Cheng Xiao’s turn up next and she was magnificent as usual. But then, the unthinkable happened. She threw the ball up in the air and when she came into position to catch it she ended up a few inches off. The crowd was shocked, she managed to finish perfectly after that, but her face showed that she wasn’t happy at all. Finally, it was my turn and I went up onto the stage. Momo still wasn’t around. Part of me was hoping that she would make this grand entrance and yell out my name cheering for me, but I turned around and looked at the door and no one came through.

“Fine…” I said to myself, “…I’ll just find someone else to dance for.”

I look into the crowd and see this girl with a bob cut looking directly at me. She’s cute, I’ll dance for her, by the end of this performance she’ll be my fan. I do my routine and my anger at Momo made me work even harder. I stay focused on my every movement, I want to make a performance so good that Momo is going to be sorry she missed it. I never once missed any of her competitions. I don’t care if this is an exhibition, she should’ve been here. I would’ve been there for her. I realize suddenly I’m in my ending position and the crowd is applauding. I get up and bow in front of everyone and head to my seat. I look at the girl in the stand again and she’s still looking at me, smiling and clapping. I guess, it worked, maybe she’s my fan now. Suddenly the announcer heads up on stage.

“I know this is just an exhibition, but in every competition, there is a winner. And today, that winner is Mina Myoui!”

I won? I won! I run up onto the stage and hold up my trophy and smile. This is proof that I was on the right track, the track to winning at Nationals. As soon as I got off the stage, someone taps me on the shoulder.

“Hi Mina, congratulations on the win, you were beautiful out there. You made a fan out of me.”

I was completely in shock. I can’t believe I actually made a fan out of this girl. Although, I can’t show her how surprised I am. I displayed so much confidence on stage, if she finds out I’m some shy girl in of the stage, I might lose her.

“Oh really? That’s good because that’s what I was intending to do. I like to find a cute girl in the stands and tell myself that I’m dancing for her. This is the first time one actually came up to me though. What's your name?”

"Son Chaeyoung. So were you really dancing for me?"

"I always dance for the most beautiful girl in the room. After I saw you, it was easy to choose."

She blushes, and she gives me her number and tells me we should hang out sometime. Is this really happening right now? As I look at her face up close I realize that she’s even cuter than I thought. She has these cute dimples that show up whenever her mouth moves and I can’t but lose focus whenever they show up. After Chaeyoung leaves I head to the locker room. I get dressed and as I walk out of the locker room, I see someone barge through the doors of the gym. It’s Momo.

“Mina oh my gosh, did I make it? I totally forgot about the competition today, I thought it was next week.”

“The competition is over, I won by the way.”

“That’s amazing! I know this is just an exhibition, but that’s still amazing! Congratulations!” Momo comes in to hug me but I push her away.

“You promised me you’d be here. And you’re telling you just forgot?”

“Mina, I’m sorry. I messed up I know, but it won’t happen again I promise.”

“Ok.”

“Do you want to go home together?” Momo asks hesitantly.

“…No, I want to be by myself right now.”

I arrive at home and decide to change into more comfortable clothes. I reach into my pocket and throw my phone onto my bed. I notice a paper fell out of my pocket. I pick it up and it’s Chaeyoung’s number. I figured why not, the day couldn’t possibly get worse, and put her number into my phone and text her. She replies, and we talk all night. After that, we kept talking for months. We started hanging out more often and I realized that there was something different about this girl. Whenever I practiced, I caught myself thinking about her. Whenever I thought about her, I practiced even harder. She made me want to get better. I wanted her to keep being my fan. But was that really it? One day I saw Chaeyoung at school and she was wearing a brown leather jacket, with black jeans and knee high boots, and my heart stopped for what seemed like forever. That’s when I realized, I had feelings for Chaeyoung. I decided I was going to ask her out, not right now, but maybe after Nationals, which was only a few weeks away. At least that’s what I thought I was going to do. One day after school, Chaeyoung texts me and asks me if we wanted to hang out. I needed to practice, but since this was Chaeyoung I pushed my schedule a little to make room for her. When we met, I looked at her and saw that she was wearing the same outfit, that same leather jacket with black jeans and black leather boots as not too long ago. She looked amazing, I knew then and there that I couldn’t let this girl slip from my hands.

“Chaeyoung, I know you’re the one that called me here, but I have to get something off my chest.”

She looked surprised.

“Oh? What is it?”

“Chaeyoung I...I like you. I like you a lot. These past few months with being around have been amazing. When I practice my routines, I can’t help but think of you. I can’t help, but practice harder for you. You make want to be a better dancer. You make me want to be a better person. Will you go out with me?”

I thought my heart was going to explode because of how fast it was beating. Chaeyoung stood there with a smile on her face.

“Mina I like you a lot too. You make me feel really special. Yes of course I’ll go out with you!” She says as she smiles, showing off her cute dimples that make me go crazy.

So Chaeyoung and I started dating, I kept it a secret because I didn’t want anyone else to get between us. Plus, all the attention this could give me would distract me from training for Nationals. So except when I was at school, or with Chaeyoung, all I did was practice. I practiced as hard as I could, I was going to win, I was going to win for Chaeyoung. Everything seemed like it was going well until one day, while I was practicing my routine, I got a call from Chaeyoung.

“Is it true? Have you and Momo really been more than just friends? Did you really do those things that they’re saying about you guys?”

I’m shocked. How did she find out about this? I couldn’t say anything until I realize I’ve been quiet for too long and that I need to speak up.

“Yes. It’s all true. But wait Chaeyoung! Ever since I met you I told Momo that I didn’t want to be with her anymore. We never were officially dating. She took it hard, but she understood that you make me happy. So please don’t be mad at her. I’m sorry I never told you about it before, but when I realized that you didn’t know about the rumors I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I was afraid of what you would think of me.”

“Don’t worry, I’m glad you were honest with me. Thank you.”

But the truth was, I wasn’t being completely honest. While it was true that I haven’t done anything with Momo since Chaeyoung and I started dating, I still haven’t actually told her about us yet. I realized that I needed to change that soon. I decided to take care of it the next time we’re alone together, whenever that was. Finally, it was time for Nationals, and I was a nervous wreck. The stadium we were to perform in was massive, how was I supposed to find any cute person in this crowd, yet alone my tiny Chaeyoung? Time flew by faster than my heart could race, and believe me it was racing. So many people I had only heard about from online articles like Cao Lu, Chanmi, Eunji, and many more were here and as I watched them perform, all I could think about was how in the world do I stand a chance?

Now up next, Cheng Xiao.

Cheng Xiao is up next? Oh no, and I’m right after her. I take a deep breath and try to relax. I watch Cheng Xiao perform flawlessly. She was definitely determined to make up for the mistake she made in the exhibition competition not too long ago. Every time she tossed the ball into the air she had full confidence that she would catch it, and that she did. She didn’t even look at the ball at certain points in her performance. I could hear gasps from the crowd as she kept going. My anxiety sky rocketed. Soon enough, Cheng Xiao is finished and the crowd goes wild. I walk nervously up the stage and Cheng Xiao gives me a smile as she passes me. I look into the ocean of people around me and I just can’t focus at all. I feel like running off the stage when I look to my left and see Momo on the sidelines. She waves her hand in the air and brings over another person next to her. It’s Chaeyoung. I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. Then it hits me, what was Momo doing with Chaeyoung? Does she know how I feel about her? I take one more look at Chaeyoung and take a deep breath. This is what I practiced for, I’m going to win, not just for me, but for Chaeyoung too. I close my eyes as the music starts and next thing I know when I open my eyes and I’m in my ending position and I hear the crowd roaring. I stand up and realize that the crowd is cheering for me. I think this might just be the loudest they’ve been all day. I turn around and see Momo and Chaeyoung jumping for joy cheering for me. I run down to them and hug them both. I see my parents here too and I run down to them and hug them too.

“Dad you made it!” I yell happily.

“I told you I’d be here even if it got me fired!”

“Wait you didn’t actually get fired did you?” I ask cautiously.

“No honey, of course not, I got the day off to see you. You were beautiful out there. I am so proud of you Mina.” I smiles and I hug him tighter.

“You make us so happy Mina, win or lose you were absolutely stunning out there today.” My mom says as she brushes my hair.

“Mom were you the one that brought Momo and Chaeyoung here?”

“Yupp, I was going to bring only Momo, but she begged me to bring along Chaeyoung too. I didn’t even know who she was! Are you two close? You never mentioned her before.”

I look over to the two girls, “Yeah you could say that.” I smile. “I’m going to go over to them ok guys?”

“You go be with your friends honey, we’ll be right here.” My dad says.

I run back over to the girls and we look at the stage as the announcer walks up.

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming the the National Rhythmic Gymnastics Competition this year. And I also want to thank all the contestants today that tried their utmost best, and gave us a magnificent show today. You were all truly amazing, but there can only be one gold medalist today.”

I look to Chaeyoung and she holds my left hand as we wait for the announcement. I turn to my right and look at Momo and she just looks at me and smiles.

“And third place today goes to…Cao Lu!”

I take my 500th deep breath of the day and I feel like my lungs are going to collapse.

“Second place today goes to…Cheng Xiao!”

I look at both Momo and Chaeyoung and I hold my breath for one last time.

“And now finally first place and the gold medal today go to…Mina Myoui!”

The crowd begins to roar again and I can’t believe what just happened. Out of all the gymnasts in all the nation, I won the gold medal.

“What are you doing!?” Momo screams.

“Get up there!” Chaeyoung yells, and she pushes me up towards the stage.

I accept the medal and wave to the crowd, tears start falling down my face. All my hard work has paid off.

After the awards ceremony, people start to leave, and I head down to my parents.

“Mina, we’ll head over to the car, Momo and Chaeyoung will keep you company while we bring it over.” My mom says.

As soon as my parents leave, Momo pulls me over to the side.

“Mina we need to talk.”

“What is it Momo?”

“Mina…I love you. You know this. I know you might still be mad at me for that the competition I missed-“

“No, Momo I’m over that, it was months ago.”

“But, you haven’t kissed me since then…it’s because of Chaeyoung isn’t it?”

I pause. If there was ever a time to tell her about Chaeyoung and I, it was now.

“Momo, I have something to tell you. Chaeyoung and I…we’re dating. For a little while now, actually.”

“Wh…what? I thought you weren’t ready for a relationship? That’s what you told me right?”

I felt so bad, I can’t believe I did this, to my best friend.

“Does she know about us? What happens if I tell about the things we did? Will she still like you then!?”

I have never seen this side of Momo before, and I’ve known her all my life.

“She knows already. Her friend Tzuyu told her. Chaeyoung knows everything, and we’re still together. Nothing changed.”

“I…I’m sorry Mina, I don’t know what I was thinking, I’m not myself right now.”

“I can tell, don’t worry Momo, I understand. If anyone should be sorry, it should be me. I should’ve told you earlier. I feel terrible about all of this.”

“Does she make you happy Mina?”

“Yes, she does. She makes me really happy.”

“Then that’s all I really want. Go be with your girlfriend. I’ll call my mom to pick me up, if your mom asks, just tell her I had to be somewhere else.”

Momo smiles at me and leaves.

“Momo wait!”

She stops and turns her head.

“I’m not going to lose you right…right?”

“Like I said Mina, you’re my best friend, and I love you, more than anything in this world. You’ll never lose me.”

She waves goodbye and walks away. I turn around and see Chaeyoung and my heart feels a little better.

I get a call from my mom and she says that their outside, and that we’re going to my favorite sushi restaurant to celebrate. My heart hurts a little because, that place was only my favorite sushi place, because Momo loved to eat there. I wanted to find her and bring her with us, but I couldn’t see her anymore. After Nationals, Chaeyoung and I became official. This was new to me, because all I ever did before this was sneak around with Momo. Although, as the months went by, I became more comfortable, but I also noticed that Chaeyoung has been a little distant lately. One day, I catch her on her phone reading old texts from Tzuyu. We’re Chaeyoung and Tzuyu more than just friends before? That would explain why she told Chaeyoung about Momo and I. I started wondering if I wasn’t doing enough, if Chaeyoung was starting to lose interest in me. I decided to try and get into things that Chaeyoung was into.

“Hey Chaengie, what animes are you into lately?”

She looks at me confused.

“Why do you ask? I thought you weren’t into anime?”

“I don’t know, I thought maybe I’d give it a shot.”

She laughs a little, “What happened to, ‘Just because I’m Japanese doesn’t mean I have to like anime!’ huh?”

She got me there.

“Ok, I just thought I’d give it a chance because you like it so much.”

“Hmm ok, well there’s this one called Toradora, it’s a classic! You should definitely watch it, and after we can talk about it!”

I watched the first episode and stopped there. I just couldn’t get into it. I don’t know how Chaeyoung does it. A few weeks later, I texted Chaeyoung if she wanted to watch the sunset with me. I borrowed my mom’s car and picked her up to go watch it. I try to spark up some conversation by telling her about future competitions coming up, but she seems disinterested.

“Hey Mina, did you ever watch that anime I told you about?”

“Oh umm, which one was that one again? Toru…daro?”

“Toradora.”

“Ahh right that one! I haven’t finished it yet. It’s just not very interesting to me. Sorry Chaeng.”

“Oh no it’s fine.” She sounded a little irked.

“Oh we’re here! Hopefully we can hike fast enough to catch the sunset by the beach.”

Chaeyoung is not a good hiker, it turns out her short legs couldn’t keep up, which I thought was kind of cute. Next thing I know I see Sana sitting down next to someone. I had told her about this spot not too long ago, but I didn’t think she’d be here today too.

“Hey Sana! Is that you!?”

I run closer to catch up to them, then I realize the closer I see that the person Sana is with is Tzuyu.

“Sana! I knew it was you! When you asked me about this place I didn’t think I’d find you here so soon haha. Oh Tzuyu! Oh no we weren’t interrupting something were we?”

“No, nothing is going on its fine.” Tzuyu says, she sounds a little disgruntled.

“Tzuyu you know Mina? She’s the friend that told me about this place. I had no idea you guys knew each other. I also had no idea you were coming here today Mina. Did you bring your girlfriend here too?”

“Yeah Tzuyu is in the same science class as me, actually we’ve had some of the same classes throughout all of high school I think. Yeah, Chaeyoung is here too, I wanted to show her the sunset here, looks like we were a little late though maybe next time.”

It’s too bad that we missed the view, I turn around to Chaeyoung, “Babe what are you doing over there still? Sana and Tzuyu are here! Come say hi!”

“Well it’s getting dark, Tzuyu and I should probably leave now.”

“Oh here, let me help you with some of your stuff.”

For some reason I couldn’t shake off this weird feeling that something bad was about to happen.

I help Sana with their stuff on the long walk back. When we get to the cars, I realize Chaeyoung and Tzuyu were missing. Suddenly, Tzuyu appears puffy eyed.

“Hey Tzuyu what took you guys so long? Where’s Chaengie?”

“She’s somewhere behind me. Sana let’s go.”

“Whoa Tzuyu is something wrong? Your eyes are all puffy have you been crying?”

“Just get in and drive please.”

“Ok yeah I’ll do that. See you Mina.”

“Yeah no problem I’m going to go look for Chaeyoung. See you guys at school I guess.” I go and run off to the hills.

“Chaeyoung! Chaengie where are you!?” I screams out.

“I-I’m over here!” Chaeyoung yells back.

“Oh good I found you. Tzuyu came back from here looking like she cried a bunch. Do you know what happened?”

“It’s because of me. It’s because I kissed her.”

“Oh I se…what!?” I say trying to comprehend.

“I’m sorry Mina. It’s over between us.”

“Why is this happening so suddenly!? Did I do something wrong? Did Tzuyu tell you something about me again?” I plead.

“No she didn’t, she didn’t do anything, it was all me. Mina I’m so sorry, but I can’t keep lying to myself anymore. You were so good to me, and I truly did cherish every moment we spent together, but I realized that Tzuyu truly is the one I need in my life and I’m going to get her no matter what.”

Everything is happening so suddenly, I just wish I had more time to think.

“I see, are you really sure about this? Is there really nothing I can do to change your mind? I’ll do anything Chaeyoung, anything.”

“I’m sure Mina, I’m so sorry.”

Chaeyoung turns around and hugs me.

“Mina I’m so sorry, I am so sorry.” Chaeyoung holds me tighter and cries her heart out.

“It’s ok, I’ll get better eventually. I’m just glad you finally realize what you really want. I hope you find happiness in whatever happens in the end. I still love you Chaeyoung, even if you don’t feel the same.” Tears start falling down my face now too.

“I’m sorry, I’m such a terrible person.” Chaeyoung yells out.

“No, no you’re not. It’s ok. Let’s go I’ll take you home now.”

When it was time to go to school, I notice that Chaeyoung isn’t here today. I text her during science class to see if she’s ok, but I don’t get a reply until later. She said something about, her allergies acting up, but I didn’t believe it. I notice Tzuyu gets a text as soon as I do. Is she talking to Chaeyoung too? I talked to Sana earlier and she told me that she and Tzuyu were going to the fair together. What is Tzuyu doing? I write on a piece of paper to meet up after school, she says she’ll do it, but she has plans with Sana. I just nod my head and try to focus on class. I wait for Tzuyu on the side of the school and wait for her. A few minutes later, she comes by and sits next to me on the grass.

“I heard from Sana that you two are going to the fair together.”

“Oh that’s right you two are friends. Yeah we are, why do ask?”

“Because I want to know what you plan to do about Chaeyoung.”

“Are you two still together? If you are then I won’t go near her, at least not in any romantic sort of setting, I’m not that kind of person.”

“I know you’re not Tzuyu. And no, Chaeyoung and I are not together anymore.”

Saying those word brought tears to my eyes that I just couldn’t hold back.

“I’m sorry, I’m still not over it. Chaeyoung probably still feels bad about it too, it’s probably why she isn’t here today.”

“No need to be sorry. I have experience with heartbreak, trust me, it’s ok to cry.”

She grabs a few tissues and gives them to me.

“Anyway, I didn’t ask you to be here to watch me cry. All I want right now is Chaeyoung to be happy. If she isn’t happy with me then I can’t do anything about that. All I know is that she wants to be with you. If you are the one that makes her happy then I’ll learn to live with that. But, if you hurt her any more than she already is, then you’ll have to answer to me. If you go to that fair with Sana, and you realize that your feelings for her are stronger than what you feel for Chaeyoung, you tell her right away. I understand that Chaeyoung didn’t do that for you when she and I started dating, but I can promise you that she didn’t do it on purpose. Nobody deserves to hurt anymore. Ok?”

I was determined to makes sure that Chaeyoung was happy in the end at all costs. This must’ve been what Momo felt back then. I wonder how she’s doing? I haven’t really talked to her in a while, no matter how hard I tried. It felt like she was keeping her distance from me.

“Hey, Mina?”

“What is it?”

“I’m sorry for everything, I wish neither of us had to go through any of this.”

“Me too.”

Tzuyu didn’t seem like she was a bad person, she was just put into a difficult situation. I know how that feels. A few weeks later, I start feeling a little better. I put all my focus back into rhythmic gymnastics, and that help me keep my mind off the pain of hearing that Tzuyu and Chaeyoung were now dating. My friend Sana on the other hand was struggling. She looked even worse than I was a few weeks ago. She even says she’s going to win Tzuyu back. But, whenever I see those two together, I know that’s not going to happen. Although, the thought of being with Chaeyoung again didn’t sound too bad, so I let her keep imagining it was possible, just in case. I realize now that I shouldn’t have done that, because a year later Sana embarrasses herself buy doing some ridiculous dance in front of the whole school to ask Tzuyu to prom. It obviously didn’t work, which I think everyone except Sana saw coming. As I was walking home that same day, I saw Momo sitting on my front porch. We haven’t talked in a while, so I was surprised to see her.

“Hey Mina.” Momo stands up and walks towards me, “It’s been a while.”

“A while? Try a over a year Momo. I thought you said I was never going to lose you? After Nationals last year, you basically disappeared. If we didn’t go to the same school I thought I was never going to see you again. I know that it’s partially my fault for basically not talking to you either and putting all my focus on Chaeyoung, but I thought you would at least start talking to me again when she broke up with me. Instead, all you did was send me a few texts! Where have you been Momo?”

It takes a while for me to calm down, Momo waits for me to catch my breath before she speaks.

“I’m sorry. I wanted to be there for you when Chaeyoung broke up with you I really did, but I was afraid of what I would do. I was afraid that if I saw you in that emotionally broken state, that I might take advantage of that and try to win you over. But, that’s not what I wanted. So I decided to wait, to wait for you to feel better before I talked to you again. And well here I am.”

“Were you really thinking that far ahead?”

“Of course, I would never want to take advantage of you like that, I don’t even want to give myself the chance. You deserve more than that.”

It’s right here where I realize that Momo has always been worried about me and she always cared for me. When it came to everything, from my diet, to my sleeping schedule, even when she was not around, she still cared.

“Mina?”

“What is it Momo?”

“I still love you Mina.”

My eyes widen as I wasn’t expecting this.

“I told you that you would never lose me and I want to make good on that promise, I won’t do anything to hurt you. It’s ok if you don’t feel the same at this moment, but if you just give me the chance to show you how much I care about you, I promise to make you the happiest girl in the world.”

Those words out a smile on my face.

“And how exactly do you plan on doing that Momo Hirai?”

“Well, if you don’t mind, I would love the honor of taking you to prom.”

“The honor is mine. Do you want to come inside?”

“Are you sure? Are you parents home?”

“Yeah they are, but I’m sure they won’t mind, my parents love you.” I smile.

In a few weeks time, prom rolls around. I felt bad for Sana who was by herself so I convinced Momo to bring her along with us. When we arrived at the venue Momo and I put our corsages on each other. When we finish and I look around, I can’t find Sana anywhere. We head inside and look all over the beautiful venue and finally we find Sana in the lobby after everyone get’s inside. She looks like she’s not in a good mood, I figured we’d find a place with the least people to relax. Momo manages to find a big table for us to relax at.

“Psst Mina.” Momo whispers.

“What is it?”

“I’m starviiiiiing.”

“I don’t want to leave Sana alo-“

“Hey I think the line for food is starting up.” Momo points towards the door.

Sana offers to stay at our table to watch our purses.

Momo has a huge smile on her face, now that she gets to eat.

“Momo, I know you don’t know Sana that well, but I’m glad you were willing to let her join us today.”

“Oh of course, I wouldn’t want anyone to be alone on prom night, it seems so sad. It’s one thing to go stag, but it’s another to be by yourself.”

As soon as we get our food, I see Momo’s eyes open wide and she rushes back to our table.

“Sana quick get up! The food is going to run out soon! You should hurry before the line gets too long and you’re going to have to wait even longer for food!” Momo yells out.

I smile and yell at Sana to run too. After she comes, back with a plate of food she seems pretty happy which makes me glad.

“You guys were right, the food looks amazing! I can’t wait to eat!”

“It tashtes amashing choo, the shamon ish sho goodf.” Momo says with a happy look.

“Momo you’re talking with your mouth full again, just focus one thing at a time please.” In all honesty I love the way Momo eats. It sounds a little weird I know, but I love the fact that she doesn’t hold back, no matter who she’s in front of. I found it cute in a weird way. Suddenly I get flash back to middle school when we went to get ice cream. Momo was always a mess, even back then. I remember when I had to wipe the ice cream she had on her cheek from eating too fast. I realize that back then, I had a feeling that I never felt before until recently. I look at Momo as she continues to stuff her face, and she quickly turns to me smiles and goes back to her food. I know now that, I was looking for something that was right in front of me the whole time. How could I have missed it? I was ignorant, and now it might be too late, at least I hope not. After everyone has had their fill of food, I look at Momo who’s looking at the other joy of her life, the dance floor.

“Hey Sana, we’re going to go dance, will you be ok right here?” I ask.

“Oh yeah sure, I need to sit and relax with my food baby anyway.” she says holding her stomach.

I grab Momo’s hand and we start heading down to dance. I didn’t care what anyone said, I didn’t care what they thought, all I knew is that I wanted to dance with Momo. So I did just that. I don’t think I’ve danced formally with Momo before until now. I thought she would be a little stiff, but Momo actually knew how to dance with a partner really well. Soon a slow dance comes on and I look in front of me see Sana talking with Dahyun. It seems I don’t have to worry about her anymore. I look straight into Momo’s eyes.

“Momo, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what? You didn’t do anything?”

“I’m sorry for leaving you for Chaeyoung, I’m sorry for taking so long to realize what I felt deep down inside only just now.”

“Mina, what are you saying?”

I close my eyes and lean into Momo lips as we sway along the dance floor. I used to only want to do this in secret, but now I don’t care who sees. I let go of her lips and rest my head on her shoulders.

“Momo I love you.”

Momo stops moving and I look up and she’s smiling.

“What was that? I didn’t quite catch what you said there?”

I was surprised, normally Momo can hear me no matter what.

“I said, Momo I love you!” I say louder.

“Yeaah no, maybe if you lean in closer, I think the music is too loud.” She jokes.

“I SAID, MOMO I LOV-“

Momo kisses me on the forehead and stand there in the middle of dance floor stunned.

“You finally said it, I love you too Mina.”

We dance the rest of the night away in each other’s arms, and there’s no where I’d rather be.

Four Years Later

“Ok kids gather around! It’s story time!” I say out loud.

“Wow Mrs. Myoui, you were actually pretty loud!” the kids laugh.

“Haha very funny, who wants to hear the story of how we were able to get this big building just for us?”

“Oh I do!”

The kids turn around and see Momo raising her hand.

“But you’re in the story, Mrs. Hirai! Don’t be silly!”

“It doesn’t mean I don’t like to hear it!” Momo laughs.

She looks at me with endearing eyes and sits next me. I look around the walls and see all the trophies and awards we’ve earned, and I turn back to Momo and hold her hand.

“Ok kids, this is how MiMo Dance Studio got started.”

21 notes · View notes