#I think I might get the author’s other standalone book

[nani-nonny]

I finished my book now what… read my other book on my tbr list? Or continue where I left off on my fic lol?

[trippinsorrows]

without you + three

authors note: welp. the ball is, gradually, rolling.

do not read this story if you haven’t read ’with me’. it won’t work as a standalone.

warnings: none

song inspo: be without you by mary j. blige

one + two

words: 4k

“I’ve been thinking.”

“That’s never a good thing.” Removing your eyes from the book in hand, you glare and flip your soon to be ex-fiance off if he keeps playing with you like this. 

Of course, he simply laughs as you shove on Joe’s shoulder.. “I’m serious.”

His hand moves to your stomach, rubbing a circle as he beckons, “tell me.”

Using the bookmark on the comforter, you stick it in the page you’re on and lay it against the side of you. “I think we should take Callie back so she can have her graduation.”

Joe looks over at you, brows furrowed. “I thought we were just going to do something here?”

“I know, and I think we still can, but I don’t want to take that from her. She was really excited about graduating.” It’s something you’ve been thinking about a lot, both as a teacher and a mom. It’s so important for children to feel and be able to celebrate their accomplishments. Sure, it’s only preschool, but it’s still a big deal for her.

You want her to be able to celebrate with her ‘classmates.’

And you express as such.

“She should be able to celebrate with the other kids. Plus, and I know right now, she’s still excited about them, but I don’t know, something tells me she’s going to struggle with some form of jealousy when the babies get here.”

Joe nods, not necessarily disagreeing with you. “But, that’s not entirely abnormal, right?”

“No, doesn’t mean it’ll be any easier to deal with though.” Frowning, it’s only now you also think about how that might be for you as well. For almost five years, you’ve been able to devote all of your time and attention onto one child. 

Now, it’s about to be four.

“Hey.” Joe, forever adept at reading you, brings his hand to your chin, forcing your gaze to land on him. “We’ll handle it together, alright?”

His words, as per usual, comfort you greatly. “You’re right.” His thumb flicks your chin, as you chuckle. “It’s probably good her little spoiled self is spending all this time with you now. Before she has to share you.”

His scowl makes you snort as he drops his hand back to your ever growing belly. “She’s not spoiled.”

“Joe, as the kids say, be so fucking for real.”

“What?”

Ignoring the fact that this man literally probably still has an AOL email with out of touch he is, you continue with your very valid point. “That little girl is spoiled rotten. You give her whatever she wants.”

“She doesn’t ask for much.”

“Not you being in straight up denial.” He’s so down bad for Callie Bear. It’s not even funny. “Need I remind you of her little tantrum two weeks ago? Baby, the way you folded so quickly should have been recorded. Tribal Chief, my ass. Got taken down by a four year old.”

Joe shoves you gently. “Shut up.”

Laughing, you continue, “just admit it, she has you wrapped around her lil’ finger, and she knows it. That’s why she tried you the way she did, but I mean it, next time it happens, and it will, set her little butt straight. She can take it.”

Joe’s frown doesn’t make it any easier for you to hold in your laughter. “I don’t like being mean to her.”

“It’s not being mean, baby. It’s being a parent. As much as she loves to play with you like you’re one of her little friends, you’re not. You’re her dad. She needs to respect you as such.”

“She does,” he defends, and you sigh, knowing this is probably just a battle you won’t win. Quieting down, you decide to switch topics to something you’ve been thinking more about as you prepare for the arrival of your children.

“I’m gonna tell her, you know. When she gets older, that I’m the reason you weren’t there the first few years of her life.”

Joe sits up in the bed, removing his hand from your stomach, concern evident all over his handsome face. “Y/N—”

You lift your hand to silence him. “No, she’s going to eventually ask, and I’m not going to lie to her. Whatever anger she feels would be justified, and I’ll handle it.” 

You’ve thought about this more and more as you progress with your pregnancy. The fact that these babies will get to experience Joe from day one when Callie didn’t. There’s undeniable unfairness, and should she ever want to know just why Joe was MIA at the beginning, you will be honest with her.

You’ll make sure she knows that it was you who decided to keep her a secret from her father. How specific you’ll get will depend on her age, but you’re not a fan of lying to and holding secrets from kids when it directly impacts them.

You know firsthand how thinking your dad didn’t want to be around can fuck with someone’s mental.

You won’t let that be the case with Callie.

Joe looks just as bothered, like he doesn’t want you doing anything that could impact how Callie sees you. “You don’t have to do that.”

“Oh, but I do and will, baby.” You place your hand to his cheek, his beard a little more outgrown and slightly unkempt as he truly relaxes in the embrace of vacation. “Because that’s one thing I never did and would never do. I never let anyone say any disrespectful shit about you not being in Callie’s life. Amir would try it a lot, and I shot him down every time.”

The mention of Amir brings a scowl to Joe’s handsome face. It’s a bit of a distraction technique you’re grateful worked. This will also be a revisited topic over the years, clearly. “I don’t know what the fuck you saw in him.”

Small smile on your face, you shrug, “he’s not ugly, and his dick was decent.” And before he can say anything smug and smart, “yours is better, duh. Why you think I’m giving you all these kids, huh?” He smiles and shakes his head. “You gotta have God tier dick for me to push out not one but gonna be four of your big headed ass children. Boy, I wish you would try to leave me. You gon be wrestling into your eighties with how much I’ll come for you in child support.���

He rolls his eyes and kisses your temple, “you know I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.”

“Of course not, who the hell is gonna want me with all these damn kids?” The topic at hand reminds you of the book on the side of your bed, the previous reason you two were taking a break from figuring out your approach for letting friends and family know about the courthouse wedding. “Now, we really need to start deciding on names. I’m almost five months.” Pretty soon you’ll be finding out the sexes of the babies. It’s crazy to you how quickly this pregnancy is passing by, most likely due to the happiness you feel. 

Time flies when life is good. 

“Did you get Callie’s list?” 

He curses. “Shit, I forgot.”

You wave him off. “No worries.” Sitting further up in bed, you shout out, “Callie Bear! Bring us your list for baby names!” 

She doesn’t say anything, and you start to try again when she comes running into the room, Disney notebook in one hand and her American Doll in the other. She doesn’t hesitate to climb onto the bed and sit on her knees at the end, “here you go, mommy!”

You accept her notebook that’s already opened to her list of potential baby names that she came up with. “Thank you, baby.” Callie switches to sitting with her legs crossed, her doll that looks just like her, courtesy of her rich ass daddy, smack dab in the middle. “Let’s see.”

A smile falls on your face as you share the notebook with Joe, pointing out the first name that he also smiles at. 

“Moana.” Predictable. So predictable. “Maui. Hei Hei. Tamatoa.” Joe coughs beside you to clearly hold in his laugh. “Baby….are these all names from Moana?”

Callie nods happily. “And Toy Story and Encanto and The Little Mermaid,” she essentially continues to sing-song list off damn near every Disney movie ever created. “The babies have to like Disney too, mommy! Like me, you, and Grandma.”

“You’re so right.” To be fair, you really shouldn’t have expected too much more. She is one Disney loving kid, through and through. “Well, thank you so much for the list, Callie Bear.”

“Daddy, did you make a list?” She asks, head tilted as she gently caresses the top of her doll’s head.

“Not yet, baby. Mommy and I are gonna make one together.” 

“I like baby Moana.” 

He chuckles. “But you’re our little Moana.”

She pouts and corrects, “no, I’m Callie.” Her sass makes you laugh. Joe wasn’t entirely wrong. She really is a lot like you sometimes. “I want a baby sister named Moana.”

“What if they’re all boys?”

You and Callie have similar reactions. It’s just that yours is one of horror and hers is more of shock.

“Noooo, I want a little sister.” 

Adding onto Callie’s vehement protest, you make your own strong thoughts and feelings known. “And I am not pushing out three boys at once, Joe. You done lost your god—”

“What do you want for your birthday, Callie Bear?” You’re partially thankful for the save but also irritated he’s asking this question he already knows is gonna generate a wild ass answer.

“A puppy!”

See.

You do your best to use the perfect combination of understanding yet assertiveness. “Baby, we done had this conversation before, we are not getting a puppy until you’re at least ten.”

“But, I’ll be old!”

“Exactly, old enough to take care of a puppy.” One look at Joe, and you can see he’s about to open his mouth and probably find some reason to ‘agree’ with or at least defend Callie’s request. “Absolutely not. No dog until she’s older, and that’s final.”

Callie, understandably, does not agree nor like this rule, and it’s evident in her deep pout and the way she crosses her arms over her little body. “Not fair.”

“Life ain’t fair, buttercup.” You retort, quickly reminding her as you take in her appearance. “Speaking of, it’s almost time for your wash day….”

The infamous, dreaded day of nonstop hair washing and styling is enough to wipe her smile away and award her a brand new reason to start whining, “I don’t want to.”

The feeling is mutual. “Neither does mommy, but we gotta do it eventually, Callie Bear.” Looking over at Joe, you inform him, “and you will be present for this ordeal, sir, so you can learn how to do her hair for me.”

He looks confused, nose turned up. A chuckle is withheld at how much he and his daughter mimic each other in this situation. “Baby, I don’t know how to do hair.”

Sucking your teeth, you smartly point out, “you do your own!”

“I barely do anything with my hair. You know this.” 

Damn. He’s right. Lucky ass. “Regardless, when I get too big to be bending over the sink like that, someone’s gonna have to do it.”

Of course, Joe’s smartass just decides to throw out something that should probably be discussed before saying around Callie, “I’ll take her to your mom.”

Callie’s eyes light up a bit. “Grandma!”

“Joe.” Lord, this man got too much money or something. “You seriously are going to fly our daughter out to my hometown so my mama can do her hair?”

He shrugs, clearly not seeing an issue with what’s being proposed. “Yeah.”

Rolling your eyes and shaking your head, you lean further back in the pillows of the bed. “You are too—” However, you’re cut short mid-sentence, face and chest dropping simultaneously, the change in your disposition enough to catch Joe’s attention. 

“What’s wrong?” He’s sitting up even more, expertly masking the concern that’s growing by the second. Recognizing this, you will that small smile to start forming on your face, shaking your head as you motion for him and Callie to move closer.

“Mommy?” Callie is just as confused as you reach for both her and Joe’s hands, placing them on your belly, trying to find the spot of origin. “What—”

This time, she’s the one to stop mid-sentence as she feels it, the sensation you last felt when you were pregnant with her. Callie’s face is still set with understandable confusion, but your gaze on Joe reveals minimal concern and an abundance of amazement. 

“What is that, mommy?” Callie finally asks. The emotion in your throat takes you back a bit. You’re not typically a super emotional person, but there’s something about this moment, about feeling your babies kick for the first time and being able to share it with your fiance and child that does something to you. Knocks at those pillars that hold up your resolve. 

“That’s the babies. They’re kicking.” You explain, smiling a bit as Callie looks at you in horror.

“Why are they hurting you?”

“They’re not, sweetie. That’s what babies do. As they get bigger and grow, they need to move around and sometimes kick. You did the same thing to me.” Adding some playfulness into your voice, there’s a level of relief to see she appears less concerned. 

Your attention, however, is brought back to Joe as he kisses your temple, hand still planted on your stomach, clearly soaking up every bit of this precious, cherished moment. 

“I love you,” he murmurs against your temple. It’s such a simple statement, a little three letter sentence that means more than anyone could ever understand. Moving your hand to the side of his face, you both laugh as Callie moves her face to your stomach. 

“Don’t kick mommy too much, okay, little babies?” The determination on her face should be captured and locked away for safekeeping for the rest of time. “She’s the bestest mommy ever and pretty and smart and—”

“—and still not getting you a puppy.” While your daughter is undoubtedly one of the sweetest kids you’ve ever come across, she’s also intelligent as hell. And you know her like the back of your hand. Enough to know where she’s headed with this. 

And, you’re proven correct when she rolls her eyes again, making a ‘hmmph’ sound that has Joe chuckling next to you. She then sets her little plotting sights on Joe as she takes her hand from your stomach and moves to crawl into his lap.

You have to keep yourself from rolling your own eyes as she pulls out that sickeningly sweet voice and holds onto his shirt. “Daddy?”

Joe doesn’t hesitate to answer right away. “Yes, baby?” One look at him, and you already know what the answer is going to be. This man is so weak for this little girl. It’s not even funny. 

“Hallie wants a friend…..” Joe’s eyebrows cave in confusion as he looks over at you. 

Gesturing to her American Girl doll on the edge of the bed, you fill him in, “that’s what she named the doll.” 

He chuckles, clearly amused by the name that rhymes with hers. “She does?”

Callie nods, that excitement building back up. “Two friends!”

Mouth dropping, you prepare to put this child in her place when Daddy Warbucks beats you to it, living up to his reputation.

“Well, then we need to get her two friends.”

“Yay!” Callie celebrates, hugging Joe who ignores your look of disapproval. “Can I make her friends too?” 

And once again, the first living, breathing bank to ever exist is quick to fold. “Of course, Callie Bear.”

“Yay!” She cheers yet again for another way too easy battle. It’s not even a battle at this point. Battle would mean that both parties have somewhat of a chance, and Joe is clearly putty for his little girl. “Thank you, daddy.” She seals the deal with a hug and kiss on his cheek before climbing off the bed, grabbing Hallie as she shares, “I’m gonna make them now!”

With her tablet, clearly. The tablet you’d bet any money Joe once again disabled the time limits on. 

Lord, you’re about to have five damn children to take care of at this point. 

It’s only when Callie is out of the room and on her way to celebrate yet another successful day of finessing her daddy that you punch this man in his big ass arm. 

“What?” It’s him having the audacity to sound and look confused that has you ready to kick him out of the room. 

“What do you mean what?” Angling your body more toward him, you explain, “Joe, why are you buying her more dolls? American Girl dolls, at that. I know you must have paid at least $300 for the first one you got her. I saw all them accessories.” He rolls his eyes but doesn’t deny it, because he can’t. Callie had always asked you for one, and while you could have scraped some money together to make it happen, you couldn’t come to grips with just how many other more useful things one could do with that money. “She doesn’t need them dolls, babe.”

“You gon’ let her get a puppy now?”

An easy ass answer. “Hell no.”

He has the nerve to catch a slight attitude with you as he affirms, “then she’s getting the dolls.”

Rubbing your temples, you realize this isn’t a ‘fight’ you’re not going to win. “You know what, whatever. You do what you want, but I’m telling you right now, these—” You bring his hand back to your belly. “—babies are not going to be spoiled like their big sister. They gon be like Oliver Twist and grateful for a bowl of soup.”

He moves his hand around, probably trying to see if he can feel any more movement. “Callie is grateful.”

“For now.” Not really wanting to have this circular dialogue with him, you grab your phone to see a couple missed texts but open the one from your mom first, instantly rolling your eyes. “Not this again.”

The shift in your voice catches Joe’s attention. “What?”

Shaking your head, you show him the thread, thumb right next to the link for an article on ‘melanin maternal mental health’. 

Talk about fucking alliteration. 

“I don’t know what’s been up with her lately, but she’s been sending me all these links for articles and like motivational photos about mental health and motherhood.” You explain to him, going to heart the message and send a quick response to at least show some appreciation. Because there is a little there. That your mom cares about you so much. But the concern isn’t necessarily valid or needed..

This is the happiest you’ve been in some time. A long time. If ever.

Nothing is going to change that.

Especially being a mother to three more children. 

Placing your phone back on the nightstand, a glance at Joe reveals he’s debating something. “What?”

He moves closer to you, hand pushing back some of your coils. “Been thinking about that movie thing…..”

The smile on your face grows as you move closer, eyes twinkling with all the curiosity in the world. “What did you decide?”

—------

Megan is having a wonderful day.

One of the best she’s had in a while.

Not only did she manage to wake up on time, but the coffee she ordered from this cute little cafe she found while on a business trip in Denver a couple months ago awaited her on the outside of her apartment door when she got back from her pilates class the night before.

And there’s few things she loves more than a delicious cup of morning Joe.

A smirk falls on her face as she hums “Here Comes the Bride” while engaging in her extensive shower routine, admiring the expert work of her wax lady. Body hair has always been an absolute no. But, it’s when she moves the loofah across the weight of her heavy breast that Megan imagines hands and not her loofah. Big hands that would cup her boobs roughly as he forces her to turn around, slams her up against the shower wall and fucks her hard from behind, her moans and shouts of pleasure dancing across the tile, alerting everyone of just who owns this pussy.

Hand gliding down her wet, nude body, she keeps the vision going, slender thighs clenching together at the thought of him forcing her on her knees, his dick down the back of her throat, eyes watering as he mouth fucks her.

“Joe….” Thin fingers slip past wet folds as she realizes she’s going to be a couple minutes late for work.

So worth it though. 

Because Megan hasn’t come like that in years. Her legs are practically wobbly as she finally exits the shower, bathroom mirror completely fogged to where she has to grab a towel to clear up a section so she can see herself.

The pink tinge of her cheek brings a sly smile to her face. 

“I can’t wait until we can be together, my love…” A sweep of sadness comes over her as she grabs her phone, admiring his handsome face on her lock screen and opens Apple Music to play his entrance music, selecting the repeat button before she continues with her routine. 

It takes her about the usual time.

And soon enough, Megan is out the door, having finished her delicious coffee and opted to just have a banana for breakfast. There’s no time for unnecessary caloric intake.

She has to start preparing for the wedding. 

Walking into the office, right away, she can detect the almost sullen atmosphere and does her best to match the vibe.

To play along. 

And before she can go to her office bestie, Paige, to “find out” why everything feels so off, the team is pulled in for a mandatory meeting.

Luke’s quiet demeanor does take her a bit back. He’s never quiet. She’s not complaining though. Not at all.

As soon as everyone is seated, he starts off with the general pleasantries that are weighed by the sadness in his voice. And then he gets into it. “I know some of you have heard, but for those who haven’t, I—uh—I got some bad news.” He takes a deep breath, shaking his head. “There’s uh—no way to say this, but Susan Jackson was found dead this morning.”

As an array of gasps and shocked countenances fill the room, Megan does her best to blend in, to play along with the genuine surprise of all of her coworkers.

Paige leans over to whisper to Megan, eyes also watery, “they say she killed herself. That she was found her on the sidewalk in front of her apartment building. Window was open and everything.”

Megan expertly fakes a horrified expression. “Oh my god, how heartbreaking.” She even manages to crank out some tears that don’t shed but get the job done. “I can’t believe she’s gone….”

“Megan.” She lifts her head, eyebrows also raising. “I know you worked close with Susan on a couple of clients, and you also know she was set to assist Roman Reigns on his debut film, but with Susan gone….”

Megan shakes her head, pulling out a few sniffles. “It’s okay. I’ll….I’ll do it. I’ll take Reigns as my client.”

And my husband.

Luke gives her a nod of appreciation, wiping at his eyes as he clears his throat and continues to address the room.

It takes almost everything in her not to roll her eyes. The woman was fucking fifty for crying out loud. 

She lived long enough. 

He says something about grief counseling, the suicide hotline, blah blah blah.

Megan does her best to listen but mostly tunes out the rest of the meeting. It’s irrelevant. She has what she wants. Now, it’s time to go after who she wants, the thought alone creating such an intense, euphoric feeling inside of her stomach as she casually traces the brand new tiny letter ‘J’ she now has tattooed on her ring finger.

[604to647]

Skittles

3.8K / Detective Tim Rockford x fem!reader

Summary: You catch Detective Tim Rockford in a compromising position.

Warnings: 18+ Content (MDNI please) - but it's all fluff (things start to move towards spicy near the end)!  Talk of prostitution (sex work is work!), nicknames (Shutterbug, baby), feather light dusting of angst, soft!Tim as usual 💕

A/N: Another instalment of The Rockford Portfolio! Because the collection of one-shots is non-linear, they can all be read as standalone - though there is a reference to something that happened when they first met in Marine Attraction. This one can take place anytime, but I imagine it to be earlier on when Tim and Shutterbug have started dating for a few months/they're in a newish established relationship. Graffiti Alley is a real place! There might be others, but the one I frequented (and where the moodboard pics were taken is in Toronto, behind Queens Street).

Series Masterlist

Photography themed dividers by @saradika-graphics 🥰

“Thanks for your help, Darlene.”

“Sure thing, boss.  Sorry no one showed.”

“Not your fault.  You sure it’s this alley though?”

Darlene, seasoned pro at the world’s oldest profession and one of Detective Tim Rockford’s longest standing and most trustworthy informants, gives him a withering stare, “I think I can remember where I gave the guy a blow job, Timothy.”

“Geez Louise, Darlene, alright – I’m sorry,” Tim throws his hands up in mock surrender.  Over the years, Darlene has provided him countless pieces of good intel – usually regarding the comings and goings of suspects or other persons of interest in his cases; her information always panned out - he didn’t have any reason to doubt her.

Theirs was a mutually beneficial arrangement, as most cop-informant relationships were.  He never busted her for soliciting, and to be honest, he probably wouldn’t have even if she didn’t help him.  In Tim’s mind, sex work was work and Darlene and her fellow sex-workers had the right to make a living, as long as everyone was being safe and no one got hurt.  He had a tendency to emphasize the safety part – Darlene and a few of her closer friends knew that if a client were to ever get rough or out of hand, a call to Detective Rockford would bring about an appropriate response. 

That Darlene had once tried to use Tim’s business card as a get-out-of-jail-free card was another story.

Early on in their arrangement, Darlene had offered to include some additional ‘perks’, but Tim had never taken her up on it; the power imbalance didn’t sit well with him and she eventually stopped offering, the possibility of their relationship being anything other than strictly professional evaporating years ago.   He knew other cops that didn’t object to mixing business with pleasure, and while Tim didn’t judge, it wasn’t for him. He saw it as his responsibility to take care of his informants, and he did so by paying Darlene one of his higher informant rates and providing her with some security in the knowledge that he was but one phone call away if she ever needed help; in return, Darlene kept an eye out for information that could help with his cases and she nearly always delivered.

Unfortunately, today was not one of those times.  Darlene had called and said that she had it on very "good authority" that a few of Mr. Pie’s men had been hanging out a lot in Graffiti Alley.  Darlene had overhead the men in question talking about Mr. Pie’s distribution network – an area of the Pie organization that Tim had been heavily investigating.  And as a result, Tim’s spend the better part of his Saturday sitting in his car with Darlene, parked in an inconspicuous alcove in said alley waiting for her to identify any of the men should they turn up.  No dice – during the daytime, Graffiti Alley is almost welcoming: people walk their dogs here, photographers and artists with sketch books come to be inspired by the ever changing graffiti art, even tourists wander through to admire the colourful murals. Apparently, the less than savoury characters only emerge at night.

Tim hands Darlene the envelope with her informant pay, which she accepts eagerly, “And do you have the other stuff?” 

“Of course.  Not my first rodeo, Darlene,” Tim reaches his long arm into the back seat of his car and grabs a small plastic grocery bag and hands it to her as well.

“Yesssss… you got Skittles this time,” Darlene digs into the bag, eyes eagerly looking over the selection of candy that Tim's given her as part of their agreement.  She selects the package of Skittles and starts to tear it open – eager for her sugary reward.

“In the car? Be carefu-,” starts Tim, but it’s too late.  Darlene pulls apart the wrapper just a bit too aggressively and the bag of candy explodes, scattering the little sugary rainbow orbs all over the front seats and floor of Tim’s department issued Crown Vic.

Darlene shrieks with laughter, “Sorry, boss!! I’ll clean it up!” and starts scooping up all the candy she can see.  Tim helps as much as he can, but he’s already groaning at the near guaranteed prospect that they won’t be able to find every spilled Skittle and days, weeks and even months down the line, he’s going to periodically find candy in his car – crushed, melted and sticky. 

Darlene leans over the centre console, hands groping around the floor of the driver’s side, feeling for errant candy.  Tim closes his eyes and sighs, “Don’t bother, Darlene.  And don’t eat candy that’s been on the floor, okay?”

“Tim?”

Tim’s eyes snap open at the sound of your voice coming from somewhere outside the car, not too far away.  He turns his head and looks out the window to you standing across the alley, a small smile of surprise on your pretty face – clearly not expecting to see him in Graffiti Alley where you had come to shoot photos.  Tim’s about to roll down his window to greet you when Darlene chooses this exact moment to pop her head up so it’s now visible to you from outside the car and Tim watches as your face goes from bemused to shocked.

---

You love Graffiti Alley.  It runs behind one of the city’s busier, more fashionable streets downtown. An alley in every sense of the word: dirty and lined with the bins and refuse discarded by businesses that only cared to maintain a posh appearance for their front of house.  But what the back walls lining the alley way lacked in cleanliness and refinement, it made up for in vibrant and exciting graffiti art.  You’ve come to admire and shoot the murals in Graffiti Alley many times before, but you returned often – the street artists frequently paint over, around, and even collaborate with each other so there’s always something new to see.  After a delightful brunch with your friends in the same part of town, you made your way over to Graffiti Alley with the intention of trying out a new lens you had downloaded which you suspected would pick up on the saturation of spray paint colour rather prettily.

Noticing several new murals you’ve never seen before, you had happily snapped pic after pic, rather pleased with the results when you checked your camera roll.  You’re looking through your latest set of photos, thinking that Tim might particularly enjoy a few of the bolder, stylized tags, when, almost as if you manifested him, you look up from your phone and see him sitting in the driver’s seat of his car, partially hidden in a shady alcove along a wider part of the alley way.

Tim's eyes are closed and he looks like he’s sighing – you knew he was working this afternoon, but looking around, there’s no one in this alley save him and you; thinking perhaps he’s taking a quick break, you call out his name.

Spying the look of recognition on his face when Tim turns to face you, you’re about to start walking over when the head of a woman pops up into view and based on the angle at which she appears, the only place her face could have been prior to surfacing had to be Tim’s lap.

You’re not sure what your facial expression conveys upon realizing that you've just caught the man you’ve been dating in the middle of receiving a blow job in a dingy back alley, but internally, you’re stifling a nervous type of laughter – this is awkward and mortifying.  Maybe later, you’ll remember to be hurt, but right now your confusion and embarrassment for the situation are protecting your heart.

Your instinct is to run away.  To put as much distance between you and Tim’s daytime dalliance as possible, as soon as possible.  The instant you spin on your heel, you hear the car door opening and Tim call out your name.

Only able to take two steps before you hear, “Shutterbug! Please don’t go!” accompanied by Tim’s hurried footsteps catching up to you, stopping you in your tracks - it'll be impossible for you to outrun him if he insists on chasing after you with those stupid long legs of his.

Did he even have time to zip up his pants?! You cover your eyes before turning around, not sure if you can choke down what would undoubtedly be a sign of hysteria if you have to come face to face with Detective Tim Rockford being caught with his literal pants down.

Tim puts his large, warm hands firmly over yours, gently pulling them down before he says softly, trying to catch his breath, “Baby, I promise it’s not what it looks like.”

Still afraid to look, you keep your eyes closed, and say in a rather sarcastic voice, “I’m not sure what you mean, Tim.  What does it look like?”

You hear Tim give a low chuckle, and your eyes fly open, Does he think this is funny?!  You’re ready to give Tim a piece of your mind but your outburst dies in your throat as soon as you see the desperate, near panicked expression on the big, strong detective’s face.  Normally so stoic and formidable (save with you), you don’t think you’ve ever seen Tim look quite so vulnerable.

He must register the change in your attitude, because Tim gently takes your hand in his and makes to lead you back to his car; the driver’s side door is still flung open and through it you can see the pretty, though tired looking woman sitting in the passenger seat looking at the two of you rather sheepishly. Softly, Tim pleads, “Come with me please, Shutterbug.  I’ll explain everything.”

When you arrive next to the car, the woman gives you a small nod when Tim introduces you to one another.

“Baby, Darlene is an informant who’s helping me with the Pie case.  She’s actually helped me with many cases over the years.  We have a long-standing professional relationship,” he hopes he's properly emphasizing the strictly business nature of his and Darlene’s relationship, “… part of which includes her exchanging information for diabetes.”

Tim makes a sweeping motion with his hand and for the first time you notice that the car floor mats, driver’s seat and all the little nooks and crannies of the centre console are all positively littered with Skittles.

You giggle, “There’s so much candy.”

“Yeah, well, I splurged for the family pack to be nice,” Tim rolls his eyes, but his shoulders release a little of their tension at the sound of your laughter.

Darlene comically holds up her hands to show you both of her fists, clenched full of candy, “The bag exploded and I was just trying to salvage what candy I could from the floor – Skittles are my favourite.  I promise I didn’t have your boyfriend’s dick in my mouth.”

You laugh loud and true at Darlene’s frankness – any and all uncertainty or insecurity you've been feeling evaporating in an instant.  When you feel Tim’s arm wrap around your waist, you lean into the firmness of his hold.  Looking up, you find him already gazing at you with look of devotion; he whispers, “Promise.”

Studying the earnestness in his eyes and the softening of his normally steely countenance, you believe him and whisper back, “Okay.”  The smile that breaks out across Tim’s face is nothing short of mesmerizing, warming you through and through – though you see it only for a moment before his mouth descends upon yours.  Lightly brushing your lips repeatedly, Tim nuzzles your nose and presses his forehead to yours – anything to stay close enough to feel the soft fan of your breath; he expresses his relief, his contentment and his desires, all without words.

“Dammmmnnn boss, you’re soft for her.”

“Darlene,” Tim’s voice stern, signaling an end to today’s stakeout.

“Right, got it.  Me and my bag of candy will be going now – sorry for the mess and … yeah, well, you know.  Anyways, I’ll call you if I see those guys again,” and with a wave of her rainbow colour stained hand, Darlene exits Tim’s car and saunters down Graffiti Alley.

Finally alone, Tim cups your chin with one of his paw-like hands, the other cradling the back of your head, and in a tender tone he pledges, “Baby, I would never, okay? Never with Darlene or any informant.  And now, not with anyone but you.  There’s only you.”

You kiss him softly to match the promise of his words before deepening the kiss, licking behind Tim’s teeth and letting his tongue tangle with yours so he knows you believe in him.

When you break apart, you’re in a teasing, jovial mood about the whole situation, “Not even with Darlene?  She seems fun.”

“She’s a handful is what she is,” Tim grimaces.

“But you still make sure she’s okay and take care of her,” you suspect that it’s no small deal to your gentle giant when people make the effort to help him; you look at him lovingly, appreciating that while he may not broadcast his kind and considerate nature, it likely drives all his decisions and actions.

“Well, I try,” Tim looks bashful under your admiring gaze.  He gestures to the mess in his car, “And look where it gets me.”

Giggling, you offer, “Want me to help you clean up the car?”

“Nah, there’s a car wash place nearby that has those vacuums.  I’ll take it there.  You wanna come, Shutterbug?”

Nodding, you go help Tim brush off what candy you can from his seat before rounding the Crown Vic and doing the same to the passenger seat.  Tim insists on putting down his jacket for you, and although you don’t think it’s necessary, you made yourself a promise when you first started dating Tim that you would never pass up an opportunity to see him wearing his gun holster.

As luck would have it, a high school soccer team is running a fundraiser at the car wash today, so you and Tim don’t have to do anything but sit on a bench and wait for the car to be cleaned.  You stifle a laugh as you watch Tim give a nervous, pimply teenager his keys after flashing his badge. Only when he returns do you tell him that he’s had a green Skittle stuck to the back of his slacks the entire time.

Tim sighs, with no actual air of annoyance, as you turn him around where he stands and take your time unsticking the candy from the fabric, making sure to run your palms unnecessarily over the swell of his ass, pretending to look for other rogue Skittles.

Tim looks back over his shoulder down at you, “You just about done there, Shutterbug?”

“Nope,” you chuckle, giving his butt another once over with your grabby hands before lightly slapping each cheek, watching in satisfaction at your boyfriend’s cute booty dancing a little. “Now I'm done,” you announce cheekily to Tim’s amused silent mouthing of 'Finally' to the sky.

Wrapping his strong arms around you and pulling your legs into his lap, Tim presses a soft kiss to your temple as you snuggle into his soft embrace.

“You know, I thought I might lose you today,” Tim confesses into your hair.

Tilting your head up, you meet his tired eyes, the rich browns deep and swirling, “Like if I hadn’t believed you and Darlene, and just left?”

Tim sighs and looks pained, reliving the flash of fear that ran through him earlier that you might want nothing more to do with him, “I would have understood.”

Cupping his distressed face in your hands and running your thumbs soothingly over Tim’s facial scruff, you hope he feels your sincerity when you assure him, “It’ll take more than that to get rid of me, Detective.”

“Don’t want to get rid of you.  Wanna keep you always,” murmurs Tim, closing the distance between your faces.  Mouth pressing to yours sweetly, unhurried but full of feeling – Tim drinks in your returned affections, thirsty for your reassuring and calm touch.

After your affectionate display attracts the hoot and hollers of the carwash teens, the two of you break apart, smiles goofy.  Still a ways to go before the car is finished, Tim asks if you shot any good photos in Graffiti Alley and you happily take out your phone and walk him through today’s captures. 

You’re nearly done showing him the colourful murals that caught your eye today when Tim suddenly straightens, “Wait, go back please, baby.”  You swipe back a few pictures until Tim points at a bright stylized tag and you give him your phone so he can study the screen.  After a minute or two, he resumes scrolling slowly through today's street graffiti pics, pausing only to take retrieve his case notepad from his jacket pocket – flipping to a page of notes and using it for reference while he intently scrutinizes your photos.

Silently, you watch the cogs in Tim’s mind turn, lost in his theories and the problem solving nature of detective work that he loves so much. You're always fascinated seeing him like this: in his element, where his brilliant mind and the shrewdness of his instinct meet, and he can seemingly conjure solutions to problems you don’t even understand out of thin air.

When he gets to the end of today’s camera roll, a brilliant, heart stopping smile illuminates the detective’s entire face, the type that if you weren’t already sitting would make your knees buckle.  He looks at you, roguish grin on full display, “Shutterbug, I have good news and bad news.”

Your shout of “Noooooooooooooooo!! Not again!” carries across the carwash, causing the teenagers to furiously debate amongst themselves who's to be the poor soul who has to come over to tell the two of you that Tim's car is clean.

You're incredulous. Your boyfriend really has to stop confiscating your phone for police work.

---

It’s a little past midnight when a persistent knocking wakes you up.  When you open the door to a sheepish looking Tim, he apologies but you don’t mind the late hour – not when you spy the glow of success stamped all over his handsome face and the spring in his step when he enters your apartment.

It’s clear that Tim, having gone straight to the precinct after dropping you at home this afternoon, hasn't gone home.  You pull him towards you for a tender kiss, concerned for the long hours he keeps, “You’ve been at work this whole time, detective?”

Taking off his jacket and shoes, Tim nods but looks the opposite of tired.  He’s excited and elated at the way the puzzle pieces of this case have started to fall nicely into place today, in large part thanks to you.

“Special home delivery,” Tim holds out your phone, voice full of gratitude.

“So my photos helped?”

Did they ever.  Tim eagerly shares with you the fruits of your joint labour – when you showed him your snapshots earlier, he had recognized some symbols discreetly painted into the graffiti art in a few of the photos.  The same symbols appeared over and over in coded messages that the police had intercepted between Mr. Pie and his distribution network.  The messages were unreadable and a source of great frustration for the detective squad until today, when Tim realized that the code breaking key was hidden in plain sight all over Graffiti Alley.  Tim had spent the rest of the day with the LAPD Cipher Team, decoding the messages they had on hand and setting up stings and operations necessitated by the freshly revealed information.

It had been a good day.  Tim grins at you and thanks you earnestly for your contributions. 

Slipping your fingers under the smooth leather of Tim’s holster straps, you give them a little pull – instead of pulling him towards you, Tim’s solid frame remains unmoved and your actions cause you to tip into his space.  Eyes all innocent, you blink at Tim, “I want to be paid in candy too”

Detective Rockford is on you in an instant, hungry and eager to reward you - for your help, your understanding of the nature of his work, your understanding of him.  Mouth never leaving yours, his hands roam expertly over your lithe body, slipping under the soft silk material of your lace trimmed sleep set.  Meanwhile, your delicate hands are decidedly less gentle as you tug and pull at Tim’s belt, pants, dress shirt buttons, undershirt – breathy whimpers of victory attempt to escape your occupied mouth every time your fingers relieve Tim of another piece of clothing. No patience for order, you litter your floor with his clothes to create a telltale trail leading to your waiting bed. 

A shirtless Detective Rockford rests his head on your fluffy pillows as you climb on top of him, worshiping you with his eyes, still unable to believe his incredible luck that such a goddess would allow him to worship at her alter.  You worship him right back – tracing soft shapes over his hard chest as you marvel at the goodness housed within and the quiet strength of his broad shoulders and muscles.  Though your touch gives him nothing but pleasure, Tim removes your hands from his chest by your wrists and brings them to his lips, gently kissing them before raising them over your head so he can remove your camisole.

With you straddling his hips, bare and gorgeous only for him, Tim hardens fast under the plush globes of your ass. Willing himself to slow down, he slowly skates his thick, rough fingers over your delicious curves, bringing his large palms to a rest just under your breasts.  You're just beginning to tremble with arousal from Tim thumbing your nipples, pretty peaks already pert and hard from his attention, when a frightening thought enters your mind, 

“Wait, Tim!  Wait!”

Sitting up at your urgent tone, Tim wraps his arms around your waist, lightly running his commanding hands up and down your spine in a soothing manner – eyes full of concern.

“If you used my photos in your investigation, does that mean we have to break up?” you remember the conflict-of-interest protocol that separated you from your handsome detective for seven months the last time he used your photos in his casework.  The idea that you’ll have to part from him again threatens to break your heart.

Happily, Tim would never let that happen.  “Don’t worry, baby.  We went and shot our own photos today to enter into the file - we won’t use yours as evidence,” he presses his plush lips against the sweet spot on your neck that he discovered the first time he slept with you, “Never breaking up with you, Shutterbug.”

“Good,” you breath, grinning before pushing him back onto the bed, your body falling on top of his.  Ghosting your open, wanting mouth over Tim's lips and inhaling the intoxicating, woodsy scent that always leaves you dizzy, you murmur, “Wanna keep you always, Detective Rockford.”  And then you kiss him.

[crowns-of-violets-and-roses]

Do you have any good sci-fi recs? I haven't read anything written in the last decade except Murderbot I think.

Oh I have so many. I'll skip the series and books that have been deluged with big American SF awards (although Embassytown, the Teixcalaan duology, The Broken Earth trilogy, and The Locked Tomb series are all more than worth a read to name a few) and list a few other things here that have been published in the last decade or so that I loved.

Ada Palmer's Terra Ignota series is amazing. Set in the 25th century where nation states have been replaced by voluntarily joined polities called Hives. The books are framed as a history (the author herself is a historian as a day job) written by an infamous criminal aping the style of the eighteenth century. Lots of fun and a deeply ambitious set of books. They sometimes stumble and fail to realise their ambition but still a great series.

Deep Wheel Orcadia is a verse novel written in the Orcadian dialect of Scots by Harry Josephine Giles. English translations are provided but I found it best read by reading each section in the Orcaidan first and then the English after. Depending on your dialect of English you may often be able to understand a lot of what's happening before moving into the English translation. It follows an artist Astrid returning to her home and an heiress Darling who has run away from her life. They both come to the space station Orcadia and the novel focuses on them and the ordinary people of the station. There's lines of it still lodged in my mind years after reading it.

In Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky a runaway project to terraform a planet and accelerate evolution leads to the inadvertent creation of sentient spiders. It focuses on the development of the spider society, a generation ship of humans and eventually the two of them meeting. A great work of xenofiction. It has two sequels - I've read and enjoyed one and have heard good things about the other - but was originally a standalone and can be read as such.

It wasn't published in the last ten years but Yōko Ogawa's The Memory Police was only translated into English in 2019 so I'm including it here. Set on an island where people periodically forget about different objects and concept and they're removal is then enforced by the titular Memory Police. I'm generally suspicious of literary authors writing SF (I often find it's worse than their usual writing and not good SF) but this book is brilliant and the best I've read by Ogawa.

Isabel J. Kim is one of the best SF short story writers currently writing. While she's best known on tumblr for Why Don't We Just Kill the Kid In the Omelas Hole many of her other stories are better than it. For sci-fi specifically Zeta-Epsilon is a good intro to her work. If you're into SF and fantasy her entire bibliography is worth reading and is nearly all available for free online.

Ted Chiang had a new short story collection Exhalation released in 2019. Chiang is always thought provoking and unlike many SF authors focused on exploring the implications of an idea or concept he knows how to imbue human emotion into his work. The story the collection takes it's title from is available online and is one of my favorites by him if you're looking to get a sense of his work.

Porpentine is best known for her brilliant interactive fiction (IF) . She has a very distinct voice and it should be noted her work is often extremely dark. Usually I'd recommend With Those We Love Alive as an intro to her IF but it's more fantasy than SF, Howling Dogs might be a better entry point if you're into SF specifically and if you're interested in her work she has a collection Eczema Angel Orifice which collects much of her early work. She's also written more experimental work like Foldscape a game made exclusively of folders.

If you aren't into IF Mall school was an early "rare venture into linear storytelling" that I'm fond of. She's written more linear writing in recent years and has released a bunch of short stories, novellas and an amazing novel Serious Weakness (though other than being set five minutes in the future there aren't many SF elements in it).

[lilareviewsbooks]

Short SFF Books!

I know getting into SFF can be difficult because of the sheer size of series and books in the genres. So here’s a couple of speculative fiction picks that don’t require that much time to read :)

I’ve also made a part two for this, so check that out if you’d like some more short SFF!

This Is How You Lose The Time War, by Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone

209 pages

sapphic rep

standalone

This one is a classic when it comes to short sci-fis (thank you, Bigolas Dickolas), and that’s definitely for a reason! This Is How You Lose The Time War is a story in an incredibly unique format that will, to be honest, probably emotionally devastate you in some way or another. 

Time War follows Red and Blue, two agents working for opposite sides of, you know it, a time war. Their job is to travel through time to change the odds for their respective “agencies”. But, of course, they can’t resist leaving each other messages along in the way - in the most unique manners possible.

This queer novella will take your breath away. It will lead you through multiple timelines, split into two perspectives, Red and Blue, with a beautiful, lyrical writing style, which will make you so invested in our two main characters. The author duo treats us to these fantastical, vivid settings, which are sparkling with potencial and leave you wanting to dive deeper.

Silver In The Wood, by Emily Tesh

112 pages

achillean rep

duology

This is part of the Greenhollow Duology, but can absolutely be read as a standalone. It’s also one of my all time favorites! Silver In The Wood follows Tobias, a groundskeeper who lives deep in the woods. When Henry Silver moves into the house Tobias watches, things change - there’s something in the woods, and Tobias might just have to introduce Henry to it. 

It’s been a while since I read this, but I haven’t forgotten about it. I’m always thinking about this book. The vibes are simply immaculate, and so cozy. It will literally make you feel like you’re in the woods. The character work is excellent, and focuses on older protagonists, which is always a treat. The romance is well-constructed and the second book is completely optional, taking place almost as a side-quest for the main couple. 

I wish there were so many more of these, but unfortunately there are only two. But damn, are they great! Highly recommend, Silver In The Wood and its sequel, Drowned Country!

The Singing Hills Cycle, by Nghi Vo

100 to 128 pages 

non-binary and sapphic rep

series

The Singing Hills Cycle is a good one to recommend, because it’s very low-commitment. You can pick whichever one of the three books (there’s soon to be a fourth!!) draws your interest, you can start with that one, and then go from there. The series follows Chih, a wandering cleric, from the Wandering Hills Abbey, which is preoccupied with keeping records of the history of this China-inspired kingdom. Chih goes around the territory with his talking bird Almost Brilliant, collecting stories.

This series is beautiful! Every book contains in it a beautiful exploration of folklore, and bite-sized story that will always warm your heart. Chih is a wonderful character around which to revolve this story, and their commitment to keeping records and history flows off the page - which is hella important, let’s record our history, folks! The side characters that show up on a book-by-book basis are always the best, and their dialogue is always the best part.

I highly recommend listening to the audiobook - I did so for the last installment,  Into The Riverlands, and it was amazing! Just a 2 hour listen, if that sells ya!

The Murderbot Diaries, starting with All Systems Red, by Martha Wells

144 to 256 pages

queer rep of all kinds! yay!

series

The Murderbot Diaries is for those of us looking for a bigger committment. The series currently has 7 books, one of which is a full-length novel. However, you can read the first book as a standalone and decide if you’d like to continue on following Murderbot’s adventures! Most of the books are 150 - 200 pages long, and so are a pretty quick read!

This is perfect if you enjoy a snarky narration style and a compelling protagonist who’s trying to figure out how they fit into the world. Murderbot, our main character and narrator, is a SecUnit, that is, a security android, that must accompany a scientific expedition to a distant planet, to keep the explorers safe. But Murderbot has hacked its security mode, and enjoys watching TV shows and chilling by itself. But when the mission starts to go wrong, it might need to perk up and start - oh, no! - interacting with the humans.

Although I haven’t read the whole series yet, - I’m waiting for the mood to come over me, okay! - I have the first three books under my belt, and I’m so excited to continue. Murderbot has this spark and this snark which is just so entertaining to read, and so this book will have you laughing and rooting for it as it tries to figure out how to fit in in human society. Such a compelling character, and I’m happy there’s a lot of content out there for me to consume.

The Emperor’s Soul, by Brandon Sanderson

192 pages

no gay rep :(

standalone

The Emperor’s Soul is a part of Mr. Sanderson’s Elantris universe, but can be read as a standalone without knowing anything else about this world. It’s a bit of a different rec - Mr. Sanderson’s writing style is - and I mean this in the politest way possible - dry as fuck, and definitely not for everyone. But there’s something here I think is worth your time.

The magic system here is so unique and so fascinating. The Emperor’s Soul follows Shai, a Forger, who can copy objects flawlessly by re-writing their history. But, suddenly, she’s enlisted to do the impossible - Forge the Emperor.

I would give this one a try, even if it’s not like all the others one I recommended. It’s a good read, and Mr. Sanderson is, like it or not, a classic fantasy writer that’s a must-read for most fantasy fans. And, for me, this and then Mistborn were perfect stepping in points for his fiction.

I have so many of these, guys. Like, literally, so many. So, let me know if you want more of these - I’ll write up another post! And if you’d more specific recs, feel free to drop an ask :) 

Also, check out my SFF books with queer-normal worlds list, if you’re looking for more gay stuff!

[lacependragon]

2024 Book #1: The Hanging City by Charlie N. Holmberg

Intended Audience: Adult Genre: Romantasy (Romance-focused fantasy) Length: 335 pages Finished: February 17th, 2024

Narration: single narrator, first person pov

Summary: In a fantasy world consumed by an endless drought, a young woman on the run from her father has arrived at the last place that might take her in: the troll city under the greatest bridge ever built. But in order to get in, she must tell the leaders of her strange magic ability - she can push fear onto others, though she'll feel it too. As Lark, our MC, tries to fit into trollis (their preferred term) society, she finds herself struggling to fit in when kindness and compassion don't get you far in a society of strength. But some trollis soften to her, especially a handsome one named Azmar that Lark can't stop thinking about, no matter how dangerous it is.

Review: This is a very good book. Lark is a fun, compassionate, and quick thinking main character whose mistakes are understandable and who uses all the information at her disposal in clever ways. I loved how her compassion and struggle to fit in led to so much of the conflict in the story, and I loved how it also was a huge part of her success in the story, too. Lark's relationships with other characters, including Azmar and Unach, who she lives with, are just so, so good. I loved the job that Lark ended up with - monster hunting - and I really appreciate how it never stops being relevant to the story, both in activity and in social situations. In fact, this is just a very tightly written little book and everything circles around in some very fantastic ways.

The writing is lovely, too. I really enjoy the way this author writes books - I own a few of them - and I find there's a nice cadence to the words. It's smooth to read. And that spreads into how information is given to the reader, as well. Everything feels very smooth and easy flowing.

And, just to come back around, I really, really love compassionate protagonists. I love when characters want to help others, no matter the cost, and sometimes make stupid decisions because of that. Lark is such a fantastic protagonist who works around everything she is given. I love her. I love Azmar, too.

I think my biggest problem is that this is a seriously closed door romance. A few on-screen kisses and that's about it. Some light references. I would have loved to see more - I prefer my romances a little smuttier - but YMMV.

Just a fantastic book, seriously. So glad it was my first of the year.

Things I liked, specifically:

The romance was good. I understood why Lark was attracted to Azmar, and even though we never get Azmar's point of view, it was clear to me why he liked her. Watching them fall for each other was just adorable. Also, I love when a romance doesn't rely on badly done miscommunication for its third act drama. This does something SO GOOD that has nothing to do with that!

The worldbuilding was really neat. This is a standalone, so there's a lot of questions left unanswered, but the answers we got were fun. I also loved how it tied into the plot, as well as the culture of the trollis. You really get a sense for what their people value when the architecture is described. It's very evocative. And the cultural bits we get, the government and tax and law systems, the currency and caste stuff. God it's all so good and intriguing. Layered in just enough, in my opinion.

The friendships. There are so many good supporting characters in this story, including Unach, the trollis woman originally assigned to look over Lark. She's Azmar's sister and she's basically my fave. She's so gruff and short-tempered but also fantastic. Love her. I loved all of the supporting characters. All of them were well-written, well-rounded, and had motivations that were clear to me.

LARK. Again, emphasizing that Lark is just a fantastic, compassionate and kind protagonist. She is tired of fighting. Tired of having to hurt others. She wants a family, friends, and peace, and it is beautiful to watch her strive for her.

The themes. Sometimes you can't change a place, only you can change. Family isn't what your born into, but the people who will accept you no matter what you are. It is always right to try and save others. What is a monster? What is a man? Just to name a few that I personally pulled out of the story that I just adored the execution of. It's so good. And the trollis society embodies both good and bad, and you get to see the way it echoes into the themes and guh.

Rating: 4 1/2 stars.

Recommended for: Fans of romance who enjoy good worldbuilding, fans of Holes, fans of Gentle Giant men.

[thecasualbookreviewer]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Bound to fall, A.k. Caggiano

Summary:

Celeste Delacroix’s sister is dead. This is unfortunate…sort of. But it’s also an opportunity to return to the realm of Eiren and begin anew, if noxscura will allow her.

Cursed with dark magic, living virtuously has always eluded Celeste, but she’s determined to right the wrongs she wrought in the sleepy village of Briarwyke and maybe even find her ever after, happiness unrequired and, as she sees it, undeserved. But darkness accompanies Celeste as keenly as clumsiness and shame, and when she accidentally releases a new evil on Briarwyke, she must find a divine source of magic to destroy it.

Sir Reeve, Holy Knight of Valcord, is one such divine source—not to mention incredibly handsome—and as luck would have it, already intent on vanquishing the evil that plagues Briarwyke. Unfortunately, he believes that evil to be a noxscura-wielding witch who has desecrated his faith’s temple: Celeste herself. Abyss-bent on fulfilling his destiny, Reeve’s virtue and beliefs have never wavered because the world is simple, after all—there are those who are good, and those who are evil, and evil must be destroyed.

But what happens when a perceived evil requests assistance in defeating an even greater threat? Can Celeste and Reeve band together to save Briarwyke, or will their contempt for one another be their downfall?

/

Bound to Fall is a standalone spinoff of Villains & Virtues, a completed trilogy that follows the exploits of Damien and Amma. This book takes place in the spring, after the events of Villains & Virtues, and does contain spoilers for the series including character death. However, Bound to Fall focuses on a new couple, Celeste and Reeve, who we did not meet in the original trilogy, and can be read as a standalone story.

Review:

This book took a lot more time to get through than the other books in this universe, but that doesn't mean it wasn't good. The story felt a lot much slower, and it was all set in a single town with at times made it feel like it wasn't moving along at all, however the characters are pretty interesting and make you want to come back and continue reading their story.

Celeste and Reeve are two characters that at first I didn't see myself liking much, but by the end I had a great appreciation of both, and of course the author has a great balance of humor and serious moments.

I wouldn't quite call this a cozy fantasy, because the stakes are quite high, but i think for the most part it might fit the genre.

[kamreadsandrecs]

Title: Paladin's Faith (Saint of Steel #4)

Author: T. Kingfisher

Genre/s: fantasy, romance, mystery, romantasy

Content/Trigger Warning/s: gore, death, violence, murder, sexual harassment (not explicit)

Summary (from author's website): Marguerite Florian is a spy with two problems. A former employer wants her dead, and one of her new bodyguards is a far too good-looking paladin with a martyr complex.

Shane is a paladin with three problems. His god is dead, his client is much too attractive for his peace of mind, and a powerful organization is trying to have them both killed.

Add in a brilliant artificer with a device that may change the world, a glittering and dangerous court, and a demon-led cult, and Shane and Marguerite will be lucky to escape with their souls intact, never mind their hearts…

Buy Here: https://argyllproductions.com/product/paladins-faith-saint-of-steel-book-4/

Spoiler-Free Review: Kingfisher does it again! As always the romance was on point and delightful. Marguerite is a delight to read, and honestly strikes me as much more…open, I guess? Than the previous protagonists. Which is funny given her line of work, but she read as the one with the least to hide, and was most willing to acknowledge her own feelings and the feelings of others.

And then there is Shane. I was not entirely expecting this storyline for him, but I am IMMENSELY pleased with and delighted by how it went. His connection to the Dreaming God was mentioned in passing in previous books, but now that I know how deep that connection goes, and what the loss of both that connection AND the connection to the Saint of Steel did to him, well… I mean, is it any surprise that his self-doubt runs VERY deep? This facet of his personality plays a lot into his dynamic with Marguerite, and makes for some admittedly squee-worthy moments between the two of them.

Wren is also a delight and a darling in this one. There is an entire subplot going on with her that in some ways was more enjoyable to read than Shane and Marguerite’s, largely because while the beats for the Shane/Marguerite romance were more or less familiar and unsurprising, Wren’s subplot was less predictable.

Speaking of the Dreaming God, it was fun getting to meet more of his paladins! I kind of hope some of them will get books of their own eventually, but given that there are still three more paladins of the Saint of Steel to go before the current series is finished, I suspect it’s going to take a while. And honestly, I’m more interested in seeing more paladins of the Forge God; they seem pretty cool, based on the few glimpses Kingfisher’s shown of them in previous books in this series.

I was also delighted by all the throwbacks to the Clocktaur War duology! Readers who’ve read those books are going to be in for a TREAT, given how many nods and mentions are made in passing to characters and events that happened in that series.

Since there’s a rather heavy Dreaming God presence in this book, it shouldn’t be any surprise that there are demons at play, and the one featured here is VERY interesting. Won’t say more to avoid giving out spoilers, but I think a lot of readers are going to be fascinated by this one - and by the implications that particular plotline has for a whole lot of things in potential future books in this series and in others set in the World of the White Rat.

Overall, this was a great continuation of the series, even if the connection to the bombshell ending of Paladin’s Hope isn’t as direct as some readers might’ve wanted. Then again, that’s been the pattern for this series all along, with each book able to function almost as a standalone and instead lightly referencing previous books instead of being direct sequels. Still, that plot thread in Paladin’s Hope is picked up in this one, though in a highly unexpected way that might leave some readers feeling a bit rabid about the release of the next one.

Rating: five rats

[readnburied]

Book Review: If We Were Liars by M. L. Rio

Date of Publishing: April 11th, 2017

Author: M. L. Rio

Publisher: Flatiron Books

Genre: Dark Academia, Mystery Thriller

This is a standalone novel and follows Oliver who has been released from jail after quite a long time and finally starts to tell the truth about what happened in college with his friends ten years ago. With Shakespeare taking center stage, Oliver and his friends go through quite a miasma of emotions and circumstances before the truth finally comes to light and that the thirst for power can sometimes lead to death. 

When I started reading this book I thought I wouldn’t like it. I only read this book because people on social media were labeling it as dark academia which is a genre which I practically live in and fantasize about. And when I started reading it, it took me a couple of chapters to get into it but once I did, I couldn’t stop. It captured me and didn’t let go until I forced myself to close the book once I reached the end. And even then I was left with a heavy heart and a hangover so bad, I’m still suffering from it as I write this. 

Starting off with the characters, I have to say there’s so much depth to each and every one of them. One can’t put them in one category and till the end you wonder what their motives are. Does he love her? Does she love him or just playing around with him? All the questions and more keep you guessing as the book continues. Which just gives proof of the author’s talent. 

I especially loved the setting of the story as I love books with an academic setting. The drama college and its prestige makes me wish I lived and studied there because everything feels so exclusive and alluring. And the drama studies feel so unique to me because I’ve never attended drama school and I especially loved the class where they drink tea while studying. And I have to say the writer knows their Shakespeare and how they weave it within the story is impeccable. 

Though the characters try to be friends and act like a family, it is evident that the thirst for power is there in each one. They want to support each other but they don’t want them to be better than them. And if the threat is there, then they’re not afraid to eliminate them and that’s exactly what happens when one of their friend ends up dead. And when it comes to taking the blame and calling the police, the fight for survival increases and the hope of altruism is nothing but a miracle. 

Another thing I loved was the formatting of the book. I loved how the book was formatted as a sort of a play with acts and scenes and how every prologue was a narration of the present and the rest of the chapters were a story of the past. Though it wasn’t anything unique I still found it interesting, which just makes me give some extra points to this story. 

Oliver was a beautiful and complex character and his reasons for doing what he did might seem stupid to some people but I could understand why he made the choice he did even though he had to suffer for ten years because of it. And I hated how the group broke apart but that was to be expected considering the circumstances they were dealt. 

The detective was another favorite character of mine. I liked how understanding he was and despite the evidence presented before him, he was able to see the truth and knew who really was innocent. And I liked how he was able to establish a relationship with Oliver. 

However, the ending was what blew my mind. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it and I’m still not sure if I’m right. Was it what I think it was or is the writer just messing with me? As much as I wish for a gift wrapped ending I’m glad the writer ended it the way they did because till the end the author maintained the mysterious atmosphere of the story, so hats off to them. 

I was surprised to see this book was released in 2017 because I’ve only started seeing it recently but I’m glad its finally getting the fame it deserves and I look forward to not only reading more works of the author but for reading more books like this. It really is one of the best dark academia books I’ve had the pleasure of reading. 

If you’re thinking about giving this book a chance, please do so as soon as possible. I recommend everyone to read this book because it’s worth your time and energy. So do go and purchase this book and you will not be disappointed. 

[jensjumbledmess]

My thoughts/review on How to Fall in Love with a Demon by Lola Glass!

(Updated review: Changing my rating from 4 stars to 5 stars as of July 19th, 2024 because I can't stop thinking about this book and the characters.)

Star & Spice Rating: ⭐️ 5/5, 🌶️ 4/5

There are quite a few sex scenes in this, which is to be expected of course, since the demons literally feed on lust lol. 90% of the spicy scenes are open door, there are a few casual mentions of sex in between. There’s use of vibrators, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, & moments of having sex in a shifted demon form (featuring horns, wings, tails, and well…a few physical enlargements.)

TWs:  Kidnapping, blood, estranged family/family trouble

Judging a Book By Its Cover: This cover is beautiful (as are all the covers for the Deceit & Devotion series.) Honestly, it might be one of the prettiest paperbacks I own. I’ve discovered I like a lot of this author’s cover choices.

✨📖Review📖✨

This book was fast-paced, fun, and spicy. It was a great leisure/escape read. I would say about 70-80% of this book is smut/relationship stuff and the rest is plot, which helps set up the rest of the books in this series. (The author says these are standalones, which they can be, but in my opinion, if you read book 2 first it kinda spoils one of the little twists which happens in the last third of the first book.)

Speaking of the last third, I’ve seen a few reviews talking about a tone change during that time and they’re right. It gets a bit more serious for a few chapters and something happens that causes trust issues for Tatum, our FMC. She no longer knows if she can trust Rafael, MMC. This is resolved fairly quickly and the two DO end up with a HEA. 

Tatum has boundaries, and is independent, choosing to follow her own career path despite what her (crappy) parents are trying to force her into. She lives with her two best friends Brynn and Miley, and they are great examples of friends sometimes being better than family. I enjoyed their friendship; the author did a nice job making it feel like the 3 of them were really comfortable with each other and have known each other for a long time.

NOW…let’s talk a little bit about Rafael, because let’s be honest, guys like this are a big part of why we read these sort of books in the first place, right? He’s a tall, dark haired, handsome and charismatic demon who has been in prison for the last year and has been starved for lust. (Lust is what keeps demons alive. His relationship with Tatum gets sexual quickly because of this.) 

He’s good in bed, good with dirty talk and flirting, he's rich, and would give Tatum the world if she asked for it. (I think he’s actually quite sweet.) He’s all about her pleasure 1.) because he genuinely loves her (he fell first) and 2.) because her pleasure literally feeds him (and she tastes REALLY good to him.) He listens to her and is respectful of her, not pushing her to do anything she’s not comfortable with. Rafael can be a bit jealous at times if he thinks other men, including his own two hot demon brothers, are interested in Tatum. Rafe ended up going on my book boyfriend list by the end of the book, so…

If you’re looking for something quick, fun, and mostly spice with guys that are clearly made to be drooled over, I would give this a try! I’ll definitely be reading the other two books in this series as well as some of Lola’s other work. I think she might be one of my new guilty pleasure authors!

Thank you for reading! If you liked my review/thoughts, consider following me on [GoodReads], [Bookstagram], or [Threads]! (I tend to post on GoodReads & Threads first!)

[smalltownfae]

My Top 10 Favourite Fantasy Series

I just saw a top 10 fantasy series video that upset me so I am sharing my own (current) top fantasy series. Since it’s about series as a whole I am taking that into consideration instead of ratings for individual books. I am aware that this is really petty. I am counting series that aren’t finished but I read all the books that came out so far too. Also, some of the placements surprised even myself, but stay with me.

Some extras about fantasy series I want to read/continue at the end.

1. Realm of the Elderlings by Robin Hobb

I doubt this will ever change. I read this series for the first time in 2018/2019 and I already reread most of the books in such a short period of time. I also didn’t have an obsession hit me this hard ever since I was a teen. It is very rare for me to get to these levels (thankfully to my poor irl friends that had no idea what I was talking about at the high of my obsession with this). Now, it is in normal levels of loving a series but at the time I even created another tumblr blog in order not to bother my followers because I swear this series was all I posted about. The writing is beautiful, the plot is very emotional and the characters are the most realistic I have ever seen in fiction. There are some things I hate about this series, but also many things I love and those are in greater quantity. Funnily enough this series sort of saved me because at the time I was having some suicidal thoughts but wanting to know where these characters ended kept me going and eventually I got better. Who says fiction doesn’t save lives? This is the most personal series to me and I doubt any other will ever make me feel the same way. As sad as it can be at times, it also makes me laugh a lot and the quiet talks between the characters by the fire give me a comforting feeling like no other.

2.  Discworld by Terry Pratchett

I might not have read all the books in this series. Not even close. But I read at least 10 of them so I am counting it! Since most of the books can be read as standalones anyway I feel like I am in my right. This series wouldn’t be this high if it wasn’t for Reaper Man, Hogfather, Men at Arms, Feet of Clay and the Witches series. I started with The Color of Magic and enjoyed quite a bit, which seems to be an unpopular opinion. However, that can’t compare with the later books and I see that now. The characters are very cartoon-like, but can be surprisingly deep at times and I love how Pratchett explores very real difficult themes through humour and imagination.

3. Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien

The one that is in most lists of this kind. The OG! I must say I am not the biggest fan of the Hobbit and I haven’t read the Silmarillion yet, but besides this trilogy (or one big book, whatever) I have read his essay on Fairy stories and the short Leaf by Niggle and damn me if the man couldn’t write. I know a lot of people struggle with his style, but this exactly the kind of beautiful evocative writing that I like and wish more authors would do. The big themes of Lord of the Rings are heart warming and there is still no place I would rather be but the Shire. I really like the characters too even if I have read the books a long time ago and ever since I have heard people say they aren’t the most complex. I remember the nature descriptions most of all and how Tolkien could be surprisingly funny at times. So, yeah, this warms my heart and I definitly need to give the Silmarillion a try someday. But, please do not talk to me about the world building. That is not the reason why I love this, but it seems to be a big one for most fans.

4. Pandora Hearts by Jun Mochizuki

I trusted two online friends and bought the beautiful box set for this series without having read it and I think the experience of reading it and having such a beautiful thing in my possession helped my enjoyment of this. Mochizuki’s style is very beautiful (and it was only improved in Vanitas), I really like her character and the plot - even though I saw some of the things coming - it’s magnificent. It builds slowly but it’s really worth it. The main character, Oz, appears to be the typical dumb shonen protagonist but very quickly the reader can see he is smarter than he lets on. I never saw a main character like Oz in other shonen manga. There are many characters I could praise and some I am upset about, like Alice. I feel like she could have had so much more development and it’s a bit sad that she didn’t. This series made me laugh, made me gasp and made me tear up, like all series should do to be honest.

5. The First Law by Joe Abercrombie

The reason this is in number 5 is because this man likes war and battle scenes too much. Those are not my favourite things. Still, I find First Law bleak but, most of all, funny. Abercrombie crafted some of my favourite characters like Savine, Jezal, Vick, etc. I have beef with many people in this fandom that doesn’t appreciate my favouries and only talks about the action scenes, but I guess that is the way it is when you get into a series loved by mostly men. I might have my criticisms of the books but Abercrombie knows how to wrap up the themes of his books. It all feels right for the kind of project he has. This series loses points, however, for not bringing me any comfort. The landscapes are mostly empty and I like my nature and quiet moments that are lacking in this.

6.  The Poppy War trilogy by R.F. Kuang

We could have had it all, but you had to write two books with added characters I didn’t care about and make the ones I cared about feel stale. The first book in this trilogy is still my favourite. Even though it has flaws I don’t think they are as many (and don’t bother me as much) as the flaws in the two books that follow. The first book was the only one to make me cry and I felt so much for Rin, who had a big character development that stabilized at the end of that book for the most part. This book had some shonen moments, it was funny at times and even a little bit gay. It was great. Then, the second book was a little less great and the third was just disappointing. I know Kuang was just following real historical events, but I still think it could have been done better and that some characters that lasted so little time were unecessary.

7.  The Chronicles of Prydain by Lloyd Alexander

In general, this is a 4 star series to me. However, I feel so cozy and nostalgic everytime I read it. I didn’t even read this as a kid, I am in my 30s, but the plot and characters are very familiar to me and remind me of similar stories from my childhood. For that, I have to put it in my favourites for now. This is another series that wraps up so well thematically that I love it as a whole. It’s the coming of age of coming of ages and even though Taran is the protagonist, all the other characters are also interesting and fun to follow. I have some complains about it (mostly about Gurgi’s reverence towards Taran), but I still like it a lot. Doli of the fair folk is the best character, followed by Eilonwy.

8.  Greenhollow Duology by Emily Tesh

I didn’t think this will be in my top, but here we are. These short novellas are just so cozy, especially the first one. The nature, the kind giant man, the badass mother, the mischievous fae... it’s all such good vibes. The perfect ones for my tastes. 

9.  Gentleman Bastards by Scott Lynch

Unfinished and I really dislike the second half of the second book, but I love Sabetha, Jean and Locke. Locke could be such an annoying character if he didn’t got kicked in the ass so much. I like that he has that know-it-all attitude but things never go his way in the end. I like my characters to be flawed. Pretty fun and interesting series that I wish would be continued and finished, but I am glad I have two and half books I really like.

10.  Sevenwaters by Juliet Marillier

Another series of ups and downs. I still have the last 2 books to read, but I finished the original trilogy. I absolutely despise the second book in this series and that main character annoys me to no end. The fourth book also made me really mad. However, I love the first book and really liked the third. I even liked the romance in the third, which is a rarity for me with this author. Why must people with this talent for writing so beautifully use it to write crap? I swear Marillier has one of the most beautiful and evocative styles but then some of the character’s moral values do not align with me at all. Thank you for the side gay character reveal in the later books though. I wish that was explored, but I understand that we are just doing heterosexual romances here. This, like the one that came before, will probably not stay in my top as I read more series that I like better, but it’s here for now.

Series I want to continue:

Graceling Realm by Kristin Cashore (read 1 book)

Malazan: Book of the Fallen by Steven Erikson (read 1 book)

Chocolat series by Joanne Harris (read 2 books)

The Broken Earth trilogy by N.K. Jemisin (read 2 books)

Riverside by Ellen Kushner (read 1 book)

Earthsea Cycle by Ursula K. Le Guin (read 2 books)

Chronicles of Tornor by Elizabeth A. Lynn (read 1 book)

A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin (read 1 book)

Pern series by Anne McCaffrey (read the first book in the Harper Hall)

Enchanted Forest Chronicles by Patricia C. Wrede (read 1 book)

The Dark is Rising by Susan Cooper (read 1 book)

Series I want to start:

Westmark by Lloyd Alexander

Regency Faerie Tales by Olivia Atwater

The Councillor by E.J. Beaton

World of the Five Gods by Lois McMaster Bujold

Kushiel's Legacy by Jacqueline Carey

Parasol Protectorate by Gail Carriger

Sorcerer Royal by Zen Cho

Winds of the Forelands by David B.Coe

Tales of the High Court by Megan Derr

Chronicles of Ghadid by K.A. Doore

The Hythrun Chronicles by Jennifer Fallon

Nightrunner series by Lynn Flewelling

Lays of the Hearth-Fire by Victoria Goddard

The Light of the World trilogy by Nicola Griffith

Poison Wars by Sam Hawke

Fred, the Vampire Accountant by Drew Hayes

Tales of the Otori by Lian Hearn

Soldier Son by Robin Hobb

Quarters series by Tanya Huff

Redwall by Brian Jacques

Inheritace trilogy by N.K. Jemisin

The Serpent Gates by A.K. Larkwood

Windsingers by Megan Lindholm

The Deed of Paksenarrion by Elizabeth Moon

The Elric Saga by Michael Moorcock

The Squire’s Tales by Gerald Morris

The Swan’s War by Sean Russell

Twelve Houses by Sharon Shinn

Arthurian Saga by Mary Stewart

The House War by Michelle West

Memory, Sorrow and Thorn by Tad Williams

The Book of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe

The Darkwater Legacy by Chris Wooding

[stormblessed95]

Hi I’m an 8th/9th grade teacher and I’m looking to buy some new books for my classroom and you seem to be reading a lot of YA recently!! Would you mind sharing some recommendations you think are uh appropriate for me to purchase through the school? You seem to read a lot of fantasy/sci fi/romance which is a lot of what my kids like 🥰 thanks!

YA fantasy/scifi and romance! Yessss I can!

I just finished Legendborn by Tracy Deonn and started it's sequel today and it was AMAZING. Highly recommend. It's a King Author + magic retelling, Black Main Character written by a Black Author and done SO WELL because duh, own voices. It's dark academia fantasy and such a killer debut novel FOR SURE. And it's got a the classic YA love triangle and some romance thrown in too. Plus February is Black History Month, great time to support BIPOC authors 💜 (Duolgoy)

Scythe by Neil Shusterman is a YA SciFi dystopian and its SO GOOD. It's a story about how in the future, death no longer exists. The only way a human can die is by being gleaned, aka murdered, by the Scythes. They are trained to deal out death to those who deserve it and contain the human population in the most humane way possible. Yet, there is lots of betrayals and power plays and double crossings happening between those in power of the Sycthe organization. And yes, a very cute side plot romance here too (Trilogy)

The Summoning by Kelley Armstrong. It's a YA Paranormal Urban Fantasy. It's actually like the YA verison of one of my favorite adult series of hers and it's set in the same world with little Easter eggs connecting the series. But can be read as a standalone trilogy. It follows Chloe discovering she is a necromancer and thrust into this supernatural world and all that comes with it, including a werewolf love interest and the classic YA love triangle and romance. Still so good honestly too. (Trilogy)

This Savage Song by V.E. Schwab. It's a YA Dark Urban Fantasy that basically explores the overall themes of how humans can be the monsters too. It's SO GOOD. Basically 2 kids of powerful men on either side of a war that is destroying their city, must choose whether to become heroes or villains—and friends or enemies—with the future of their home at stake.... and while one is human, one might be something else entirely 👀 Literally it's so good. And yes, it does end up having romance too (Duology)

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas. It's a YA Paranormal fantasy story about a gay trans boy who while trying to get his family to accept both his gender and his powers (the men are traditionally spirit guides and the women are healers), accidentally summons a ghost, who then refuses to move on. And yes, its got a VERY sweet and cute romance here too. Plus own voices trans rep (Standalone)

Illuminae Files by Jay Kristoff and Amie Kaufman. A YA SciFi Trilogy where it's one of the most unique formats of crafting a story I've ever read. It's told through a series of files and emails and transcripts and it's SO FUN. It follows the story of Kady and Ezra and the journey they go on after their tiny space mining colony was attacked and destroyed. And oh yeah, they had just recently broken up but they Still love each other 😏 and what in the AI happens in this book too! Lol (Trilogy)

And I really wasn't kidding about it being a uniquely written book and yet somehow the audiobooks are just as well done too lol

Warcross by Marie Lu. A SciFi YA Dystopian Novel that is basically like an emersive video game. It follows our main character as she becomes lowkey a spy and bounty hunter. Yes, it's got romance and betrayal and plot twists and rainbow hair and constant reminders that nothing is truly as it seems. And it's so good. (Duology)

As always, make sure you look up content warnings. I didn't list them here this time. But these are all scifi/fantasy YA novels that include a fun romantic side plot that I've LOVED when I read them. Hope this helps and thanks for asking! I have more I can suggest too of course

[vodid]

MORE QUESTIONSSSS

Sooo, first one is, what advice do you have for aspiring writers and artists that follow you? Follow your passion, practice a lot, don’t get distracted, etc?

What’s the best part about being an author and a writer? The satisfaction when you finally finish a piece, or when a lot of people like and share your artwork and book?

Do you read any fanfictions? I’m wondering because I’ve almost ran out of good Prowl/Jazz fanfictions and I want more to cure my need for cuteness and angst with those two 🤲

Do you listen to music when you write/draw? If so, what kind of music, or does it depend on the scene when your writing/drawing. It definitely depends on what I’m writing at the moment to determine the music lmao

Will you ever make your Obsidian King fanfiction into a little series? Like after you’re done the first one with Prowl and Jazz whenever, will you plan on doing one with like Bluestreak and a love interest and how that would all play out? Or is the Obsidian King just a standalone?

Have you ever cried when you were writing your books? The Obsidian King, Vulnerability or otherwise? I cried during Vulnerability :( poor Bumblebee man and I relate to it so much too! Like, I absolutely love your writing in both because it feels as if I’m actually there, y’know?

Do you plan on continuing to learn German despite when you finish your Vulnerability fanfiction one day and only need a bit of German for it? I find it cool to learn German! I’m learning French at the moment, but I’m thinking about learning German after.

ANYWAYS, too many questions, I have more though. I was planning to send this before you woke up at some point, but then I had to go to a doctors appointment and I ran out of data unfortunately. Can’t wait to hear your answers if you respond to this!

hello anon <3

advice for aspiring artists/writers? you hit the nail on the head lol gonna preach the three P's i told myself and others years ago: practice, patience and passion. when you're a growing artist (which you always will be) you need to have patience with yourself as you navigate through the mistakes and learning curves as you practice. the passion keeps you motivated. if you don't have that passion and patience, you might have a hard time with the practice and growth

best part of being a writer? short answer: i love getting comments that analyze my work. long answer: i have been trying my best to focus less on the end product and its reception when it comes to writing, much like my art. this can even lead back to the first question: i personally believe you should not focus most on those things, but the process more. the things you learned, the steps you took, the parts that felt therapeutic for you. that's what should be the best part. (but ofc, i do love the comments i get on my writing and it certainly makes it feel even more worth it. analyses on my writing? THE best.)

j/p fanfic recs most of my favorites come from beloved rizobact. winner takes all and crystal ghosts are my favs from her. it's been a long time since i read this one, but domino milkshake was a fun one as far as i remember. if you've already exhausted those, the j/p zine just published some fics ',:)

do you listen to music when you draw/write? lot of times, i focus best with no music or a single song on repeat. tho i don't like the silence as much, it's quite boring. i like to have something so i'll either listen to music or put on a youtube video, usually mark or jack, sometimes reaction videos from other youtubers. i don't usually switch up what i'm listening to based on what i'm writing bc most times, it's the music that determines the art but it's not the biggest influence. i tend to listen to whatever my neurodivergent brain decided to attach to that week ...or month. rn, i'm still working through exhausting a german playlist and "rising kingdom" (yes, the minecraft song lol)

will obsidian king be a series? this is the plan as i realize i may not be able to juggle the various stories all in one fic (i'm sure i could but the way i had started the obsidian king wasn't the right setup for it) the next one i want to tackle after j/p is megoplita's story. from when they all first fell in love to the beginning of the autobot-decepticon war. bluestreak and the twins may not get their own story for a long while, if at all, since i do not have anything figured out post-war.

have you ever cried while writing a fic? not any of my current ones, no. but i have cried writing you are my flower iirc and infinity (i took prowl's death HARD, man.) vulnerability does hit home with me since it's just pure projection with bumblebee, a lot of it was actual sensations and thoughts i've experienced, but it was more therapeutic than upsetting for me. take care of urself anon <:)!

do you plan to continue learning german after you finish vulnerability? hell yeah, i hope to! i don't have a solid end goal going into this, because i highly doubt i will reach any sort of fluency, but it will always be a fun and interesting thing to learn. if i did have to give myself a goal, it would be to write a fic in german to test my knowledge! but for now, it's mostly just keeping my brain busy and engaged with something new

u can always drop more questions if u want <3

[burningdarkfire]

books i read in aug 2023

[these are all short + casual reviews - feel free to ask about individual ones if u want my full thoughts or ask for my goodreads!!] 

august wasn't a real month because either i was travelling or waiting to travel, but apparently it was a decent month for reading!!

bright dead things - ada limón ★★★★★ (poetry)

all of those posts about how poetry is a fundamental food group ... again sometimes the tumblr girlies are right to put these into all of their web weaving. lots of beautiful lines that will stay with me for a long time

ducks - kate beaton ★★★★★ (graphic novel autobiography)

really interesting look into a life that is very different from mine but still has a lot of similar elements (the soul crushing misogyny transcends context 👍) i was honestly surprised by how poignant and touching this was - both the art and story are beautiful

[reread] fire - kristin cashore ★★★★☆ (YA fantasy)

this reads pretty well as a standalone fantasy, despite being the second in a series. it's a masterfully written but utterly brutal look at what it's like to be desired as a woman - it's damn good, but it's definitely not uplifting

red, white & royal blue - casey mcquiston ★★★★☆ (romance)

really easy, hilarious fun. can't ask for much more from a romcom!

hell bent - leigh bardugo ★★★★☆ (fantasy)

tbh i didn't reread the first book before this so it was a slog to get into, but alex stern is still an utterly fantastic main character and the end of the book was certainly exciting in pulling it all together

the overstory - richard powers ★★★★☆ (ecofic)

long, dense, beautiful. if you want to know if it's worth it - you get a pretty good idea of what the book is going to be like early on, so you just need to be honest with yourself about your own tastes

what lies in the woods - kate alice marshall ★★★★☆ (thriller)

decently paced and plotted thriller. nothing genre-defying but fun

the hurting kind - ada limón ★★★★☆ (poetry)

sometimes you read a poetry collection from much later in a poet's career and you realize that at this point they've touched too much grass to still be deeply relatable. it's good, it just didn't reach me personally

the tenth muse - catherine chung ★★★☆☆ (historical)

i think this might be more enjoyable if historical fiction is your usual thing (it's not mine). the first person POV didn't land with me and it felt like a book that was trying to be much more intersectional than it actually was. it was relatively interesting and many of the characters had interesting shades of grey but .. meh?

remarkably bright creatures - shelby van pelt ★★☆☆☆ (contemporary)

this had good bones but i'm certain there are other authors out there that do a better feel-good novel. i loved reading about tova but ultimately wasn't convinced by cameron or marcellus and felt like the entire book was both pointless and too forced - it didn't cohere in a satisfying way

[bushs-world]

So, one of an (additional) challenge of the fantasy book bingo was to write a review of the books you read. I have been putting this off for sometime, but finally decided to sit down and write this book review, especially since I have a lot to talk about.

(also this is my first review so it might get a bit haphazard since it's more me keeping a track of my opinions)

THE PRIORY OF THE ORANGE TREE

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐/5

Author: Samantha Shannon

Genre: Fantasy, Queer relationships

Bingo Square: Queernorm setting

Detailed review under the cut. Contains spoilers

What I loved

Worldbuilding: the worldbuilding in the first half of the book is so well written and the most enjoyable part of this book. There's so much worldbuilding in this novel, from the different kingdoms, their religion, their rulers, their practices and beliefs as well as how they see the other kingdoms. And yet it never feels like exposition or info dump. Which btw there isnt a typical expository dump at the beginning of this book. Instead we are dropped right in the middle of the world and we figure and understand the world slowly as we read through

Weaving of plot: again, in the first half of the plot, there are four different pov characters in different parts of the world. They rarely know each other (except for two characters but they are in different places) and yet somehow the plot connects them together in a very interesting and enjoyable way.

Religion: religion plays a very important part in this book and the difference of beliefs and faiths, and how that causes conflicts is very realistically portrayed in this book. As well as two different religions believing two different versions of the same story. For example, the west follows a religion called virtuedom and thinks of Cleolind, a prominent historical figure as a damsel rescued by their saint after he trapped the dragon while the south believes the saint is a liar and Cleolind was the hero who trapped the dragon, and hail her as the Mother. Similarly, the East worships the dragons of the east and hate the wyrms of the west while the rest of the places don't see any distinction in the two types of dragons and hate both.

Diversity: absolutely adore how diverse the characters in this book were. Eadaz, also called Ead is brown (her characterisation parallels the SWANA region) and sapphic. Loth is a black man. Tané is Asian young girl and Niclays is an old gay man. Sabran, a very prominent character in the book (though not a pov character)who rules as the queen of the strongest kingdom is bi.

Ead and Sabran's relationship: especially during the first part, the slow burn and tension was just *chef's kiss*

Gender neutrality: this book is queernorm so there's no homophobia. Ead is in love with Sabran, Niclays is gay and Tane seems asexual. Also instead of gendered terms like husband or wife, the book uses words like partner. Position of powers is held equally between men and women. And both Ead and Tane are strong fighters who have trained all their life. There's only one issue with the queer stuff of this book which I will discuss in the cons section.

Standalone Fantasy: lastly I loved that this is a standalone fantasy.

What didn't work

Too much plot: the second half of the book is weighed down by too much plot, which imo was totally unnecessary. There was so much additional new information and twists that it was difficult to keep a track of. For the first half it was an understandable simple plot- there r two dragons; the evil wyrms of the west and the benevolent dragons of the east. And the leader of the wyrms was imprisoned under the earth by Cleolind through a sword. Her descendents, now protect the world from the wyrms in a secret order of mages. In the second half suddenly, it was complicated with two different types of magic, two jewels, there's another second woman (that no one knew about) who together with Cleolind binded the dragons, a witch, a mulberry tree, a comet and what not. That along with too many unnecessary subplots made the book too muddled by the second half

Unsatisfactory resolution of subplot: there are often subplots which are set up or pointed towards, only for them to be quickly (and unsatisfactory resolved) in a few pages without the characters actively overcoming any struggles. Instead the subplots are resolved with a very conveniently timed coincidence. For example, the book sets up Loth going into an enemy draconic kingdom for a good length. People worry that he doesn't get hurt. But as soon as he reaches there, the princess of the kingdom very conveniently tells him she's on his side and the kingdom is suffering due to his father. He's out of the kingdom in 4 pages flat and without any struggle (n the draconic kingdom is rarely explored beyond a few passages). Similarly while he's carrying a box from the princess to the priory, he gets attacked by a wyrm and is conveniently found by a friendly mythical animal who not only saves him but also takes him to the priory (n they don't face any other struggle in the middle). Same way, a civil war was hinted for so long only to be thwarted in a very anticlimatic way before it could even start. Magical weapons are lost and found in the same page.

Passive characters: ties into the above point but everything is very conveniently set up for the characters and they rarely need to struggle. Most of the time they discover important stuff totally by chance or someone tells them everything. Tané finds a jewel stitched inside her body totally by chance, without no build up of it before

Weird queer setting: so like the book is queernorm, same sex relationships aren't looked down upon yet the marriage is between a male and female character tho the reason for that is given to be children.

[literaticat]

Hi Jenn! I am a romance writer and currently working on 2 books at the same time. They are interconnected (same world and both books focus on a different couple pairing in a friend group) BUT they are entirely standalone plot-wise. However, one of them does occur "first" in the timeline. I know you don't really work with adult authors, but would you have any insight on if publishing order matters in this case? Could I query Book "2" first if I think it might have a slightly stronger hook?

Caveat! This is JUST MY OPINION, as a READER of romance -- I have zero knowledge about the specifics of the romance market per se! Editors or romance-repping agents might have different feelings about this!!!

So if I'm understanding this correctly, let's say in one book you focus on how strangers Adam and Evie are unexpectedly thrown together while traveling to the Hebrides in a freak storm/only-one-bed scenario and, because Adam is honorable, they get married at Gretna Green and go back to London, where side characters Joseph (Adam's brother) and Maria (Evie's BFF) meet and it's hate at first sight.

In another book you have Joseph and Maria, and how they go from enemies to lovahs and get hitched. Joseph's brother Adam and his wife, Maria's BFF Evie, are side characters in the book, cheering the couple on.

So timeline-wise, Adam and Evie's story technically comes first -- Joseph and Maria don't even meet until Adam and Evie are already together.

BUT. I feel like Romance novels don't ALWAYS have go by strict timelines -- rather, sometimes they follow a family and each book hops from sibling to sibling, each book telling their own story. While perhaps IDEALLY there would be an order to this, there certainly could be timeline crossover between the multiple stories -- like, we could start with a middle sibling rakehell whose older brother is a married Duke, and then in another book we meet the duke as a young man and see how he and his wife, his younger brother's governess, hooked up. These books might be loosely ordered, but the numbers are not printed on the spine or anything -- there have been lots of times I've started a random installment of, say, the "Brothers of Cholmondeley Street" because the plot looks fun, and then I go and find all the other Brother's stories, and it doesn't really matter which one I read first, yanno?

What I'm saying is -- it's probably fine? As long as each story REALLY DOES stand alone, and nobody will be baffled if they read Joseph and Maria's story first. Adam and Evie's story is its own thing, the link is the family, not the timeline per se.

(The question, though, for me, is if you KNOW Adam and Evie's story is not as strong as Joseph and Maria's... why not make it a priority to fix that?)