Tumgik
#I was talking about Outlast 2 earlier and now I really want to play it again
becca-e-barnes · 1 year
Note
becca i can't believe i found your blog again!! i lost it a few months ago and ran into it yesterday <3 i loved reading the recent blurbs and it made me think of subby!bucky being a hardass but when in the bedroom he just wants you to humiliate the shit out of him
I haven't talked about how great subby men are in so long and I've really missed it 🤤 and I'm so glad you've enjoyed catching up on my stuff!!
I love to imagine the way a submissive Bucky lets himself give in to you entirely. If you want him to beg, he'll beg. If you ask him to degrade himself, he'll do that. He gets off on how pathetic he feels and realistically, he gets to the point where he thinks he might do anything just to please you.
And I think he'd adore having you take what you need from him, while almost minimising his pleasure because imagine grinding yourself on him without letting him inside you.
Your sex is so slick with evidence of your arousal and while it would be fun to just touch yourself and make him watch, the throbbing length of his thick erection tempts you. There's no harm in working him up, after all. He whines so much sweeter when he's desperate.
He's got no objections to you placing yourself on top of him. His dick is heavy, leaking precum and you almost consider abandoning your plan in favour of feeling him lose himself in your mouth instead. As delightful as that sounds though, you're desperate for some control and this is how you want to take it.
The first few rolls of your hips help to coat his length with your arousal. The glide gets easier with each pass and very soon you realise you can focus on the pleasure, rather than just the logistics.
The way his dick rubs your clit is heavenly. It's luxurious, almost decadent and nothing inside you feels guilty about being selfish. Not with Bucky's strong hands on your hips guiding your movements.
"You're so wet." He whispers, eyes wide, watching you in wonder. You're so lost in your own pleasure and he lives for it.
"I know." You don't feel embarrassed in the slightest. It's true after all. "This is all that dick of yours is good for. You're just a warm toy for me to use." Blunt fingernails bite into the meat of your hips at the same time your partner stifles a moan.
"Did you think you were anything more than that?" You notice his hesitation before he shakes his head. "Good. I don't even care if you cum tonight. In fact, I'd prefer you didn't. The mess is such an inconvenience but I hope you realise that I'm going to cum over and over. I think it's only fair. I'm being so kind to you, giving you something to dream of when you touch your pathetic cock later."
He can hardly control himself. This is everything he's been so desperate to hear and now he's getting it, it's almost a relief. He doesn't need to think for himself. He can give his body over to you, someone that he trusts and knows that by the end of the evening, he'll have cum until he physically can't anymore.
"I need to feel you." He whimpers, kissing your neck and shoulders. "Please. I miss being inside you."
His cheeks are blazing, flushed with arousal and embarrassment as one of your hands tangles in his hair, forcing his mouth off your skin. His eyes meet yours and your cunt flutters at the power you have over his man. He makes you feel desired and it's entirely addictive.
"Don't be stupid." Your voice is steady, carrying the confidence that he instills in you. "You don't deserve to fuck me. Why do you think I care about what you need? This isn't for you."
Lust bubbles over, his hands planted either side of your waist to stop them from trembling and although you know that you'll give in later, it's fun to watch him unravel at being denied what he needs most.
217 notes · View notes
filkyeahfilk · 4 years
Note
I gotta admit that I'm just using you to pass the message on to the rest of the filk community on tumblr. I noticed that due to the covid-19 situation, there was a virtual filk con earlier this summer. I'd like to suggest that there would be more virtual filk events (cons or even just small filk circle type things) in the future, too, even after the covid-situation has passed. As a broke younger generation nerd from a country where filk has never been a thing, getting into the filk community 1/3
2/3 and getting to know filkers, has been very hard to me, and I feel like if there were more virtual filk events, it would be easier to me at least to meet more filkers (even if I can't even write good poetry in English or any other language, let alone make music, I can't play any instrument, and my singing voice is about as good as a crow's,
3/3 so I know I don't really bring anything into the filk community to be honest), and I'd really like that! And I'm guessing I can't be the only one with this problem? Please tell me I'm not?
Hey Nony! I know filkers are already talking about the prospect of continuing to do online filk events after the pandemic has passed, precisely because of the wider participation they allow. Even those of us who regularly go to filk conventions have been enjoying the chance to see and hear people from farther off than we usually get to travel -- and for those who almost never get the chance at all, virtual events are that much more important. Personally I’m hoping that the virtual events do outlast the pandemic, and I suspect they will.
For now, there are definitely more events planned while the pandemic is still ongoing! Here’s some ways to find them:
Filkstreams.org is a repository of sorts for tracking upcoming virtual filk events, including concerts, conventions, and open circles. It’s not always comprehensive but people are working on that.
Friends of Filk is a Pacific Northwest filk organization that hosts monthly filk circles (now virtual for the duration of the pandemic), and their website hosts a very useful event calendar.
F Is For Filker is a Facebook group for filkers -- I’m not on Facebook so I don’t know very much about it, but it was recommended through ...
#filkhaven is a Discord server for the filk community, and an excellent place to meet filkers. The #schedules channel there is a place where people often post news about upcoming events.
Also, to address your parenthetical, for you and for anybody else reading this who’s wondering the same thing: please don’t feel like you need to “bring something” to the filk community in order to join it! The community exists for the people in it, not the other way around; if you want to be part of it, it doesn’t matter if (or how well) you sing or play or compose, you’re still welcome.
Hope to see you at some of the upcoming events!
39 notes · View notes
Text
Fifty Questions Tag
I was tagged by @murobrown​ (Thank you very much Alica for tagging me)
I’m a bit stumped for time at the moment so I won’t currently tag anyone just yet but if I remember to, I will edit this later and add a few people to it
1: What are you wearing? Pulp fiction t-shirt and I don’t know the name for them but there like “sporty” pants if you know what I mean?
2: Ever been in love? Not really. I thought I was at one point but now looking back I have my doubts
3: Ever had a terrible breakup? Nup
4: How tall are you? I am about average height. I know people smaller/taller than me. Don’t know specifics
5: How much do you weigh? I know it’s 16 stone something
6: Any tattoos do you want? I am not certain but I’ve always wanted a tattoo related to NIN. Maybe the Year Zero gun cross logo?
7: Any piercings that you want? Not a piercing person
8: OTP? We still using shipping talk in 2020? 
9: Favorite show? Tales From The Crypy
10: Favorite band? Nine Inch Nails
11: Something you miss? School years, I wish I took more photos/videos
12: Favorite song? In This Twilight - Nine Inch Nails
13: How old are you? 21  going on 22 in a few more weeks
14: Zodiac sign? Libra
15: Hair color? Brown
16: Favorite quote? “It can’t rain all the time” - The Crow
17: Favorite singer? Lana Del Rey by far. Something about her voice just sends chills
18: Favorite color? Yellow
19: Loud music or soft? I like energetic stuff but I don’t mind the odd softy now and then
20: Where do you go when you’re sad? I wouldn’t know to be honest. Maybe the cinema. That helped a lot with a bunch of the shit I put up with last year
21: How long does it take you to shower? No shower. Baths for me. Depends if I have free time, I can stay in the bath fairly longer if I have no prior engagements or anything or if I’m listening to a podcast/album. But i’d say averagely maybe 15/20 mins?
22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? Again depends on if I have any prior engagements (work.etc) usually about 5/10 minutes or I can just laze about
23: Ever been in a physical fight? Not that I remember but I did feel threatened by a kid in nursery for some reason so I pre-emptive hit him with a copy of this:
Tumblr media
Not my proudest moment but a vivid memory for some reason.
24: Turn on? Just genuine down to earth attitude, easy to get along with and like similar things. But if we’re talking looks, blue eyes, pale skin and red hair (natural/dyed/whatever) is heavenly. 
25: Turn off? Just being a prick really or causing trouble for no reason
26: The reason I joined Tumblr? Get close with friends at my school, ended up outlasting a lot of them on here nearly 10 years later. Funny how that works
27: Fears? The future really freaks me out. Also the dread of drifting apart from close friends too. 
28: Last thing that made you cry? I’m not really a crier besides from laughing too hard so I don’t really know
29: Last time you cried? God knows?
30: Meaning behind your url? It’s a NIN song and less cringy than my previous ones
31: Last book you read? I’d like to say it was The Last Book on The Left by The Last Podcast on the Left. But truthfully I’m re-reading my old childhood favourites, the Captain Underpants books.
32: Last song you listened to? That new Miley Cyrus song was on the car radio when I was coming home earlier so I guess that counts?
33: Last show you watched? The Boys
34: Last person you talked to? My dad
35: The relationship between you and the person you last texted? My best friend for over 15 years. I went to his little sisters’ leaving celebration as she is going to university. Things sorta gotta a bit weird as his sister’s friend kept coming on to him and lo and behold, they ended up together somehow.
36: Favorite food? I really like Tacos
37: Place you want to visit? America. Id love to do a proper road trip one day with friends
38: Last place you were? I visited my auntie and uncle who live nearby
39: Do you have a crush? Not really
40: Last time you kissed someone? 
Tumblr media
41: Last time you were insulted and what was it? I don’t really know or I’ve at least blocked it out? 
42: What color underwear are you wearing? Orange
43: What color shirt are you wearing? Black, red, yellow, flesh coloured (Uma Thurman’s on the front so I guess flesh coloured is the right word)
44: What color bottoms are you wearing? Black
45: Wearing any bracelets? I was gifted a fit bit so I’m wearing that but I ain’t no fitness person
46: Last sport you played? What is sport? 
47: Last song you sang? Semi Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind
48: Last prank call you remember doing? Don’t think I ever have?
49: Last time you hung out with anyone? As mentioned previously, my best friend's family
50: Favorite movie? Natural Born Killers
2 notes · View notes
justal0wk3yg4mer · 4 years
Text
Things I’ve said: Outlast Whistleblower  (Some Spoilers) now with friends!
Let me tell y’all a fun little story really quick. When I played Outlast, I had been with some friends and by that point we were all pretty drunk. So we would take turns playing. I had asked the one sober friend to write down funny things that I would say through out the game and they did but they didn’t add any of the commentary from our other friends. Well one of my friends read the post and suggested that the next time we play a scary game together, I should add things that the group said (cause to be honest we did have some funny conversations during Outlast). So this post will now feature conversations with friends (I had to record the whole thing). This time we were all sober.
Me:                                                                                                                  Friend 1,2,3, etc.:                                                                                                    *Player/My actions*                                                                                                   Character dialogue 
Friend 1: Why are we doing this again? And sober for that matter?                        Me: Cause you said we would play this game next time, and we’re not a bunch of pussies.                                                                                                                Friend 4: Speak for yourself, this game made me a bitch.
Me: A minute in and we’re already being molested.
*We are all watching the screens* SEIZURE!!!
Me: Look, butterfly effect.                                                                                Friend 3: Imma need you to shut up. I’m getting Until Dawn flash backs.              
Friend 5: *starts humming Mission Impossible theme*
Me: This bitch.
Friend 2: I vaguely remember sexual things in the last game. Is this game gonna be worse?                                                                                                                Friend 4: *Already played the game.* Yes.
 Me: Oh my god!                                                                                                      Friend 1: What? You don’t like microwaved head? 
Me: Run, run, run, run, runOHFUCK!
Me: Okay, so we have a cannibal in this one. What next a necrophiliac?
Friend 4: He wants my gizzards!
Friend 7: Why is he chasing us? Our character doesn’t look like he has a lot of meat on his bones                                                                                              Me: He could have a THICC ass.                                                                            Friend 7: Well that posses a new question. Does he want to eat us or fuck us?    Friend 6: No it’s still one question, you guys are assuming he has a THICC ass. We have no concrete evidence that he does.                                                  Friend 1: Can we please get back to the game?! 
Me: Hey it’s ugly 1 and ugly 2 (referring to the twins).                                            Friend 4: Me and Friend 5 are right here.                                                                Friend 5: Fuck you.
Me: You fucker, I hope you get fucked up later.
Me: Fatty!!! I missed you!
Friend 7: Hey, Friend 3, look. *We pass by the ‘Father’ writing on the wall.* Butterfly Effect.                                                                                                         Friend 3: Fuck off.
*We find the guy jerking off in one of the cells.*                                                       Friend 2: What were saying earlier about a necrophiliac?                                      Me: That’s not what I wanted and you know it.
*It was my turn to play and I died like 6 times trying to jump gaps*                         Me: God fucking damn it!!! Course my dumbass would die trying to jump a fucking hole!
Me: Donde esta. Where is the fucking exit?
Friend 1: What the fuck are they talking about?                                                     Friend 4: *Visibly shivers.* Y’all are about to find out and you’re not gonna like it.
Me: Okay I’m lost. This is a literal maze.
Patient: Here comes your bride Mr. Gluskin.                                                       Me: First of all it’s a male. Second, as a female I am really unsettled.                   Friend 4: Just wait.      
*Enters the sewing room and comes across THAT scene.*                                    Everyone:..............................                                                                                   Everyone except Friend 4: *Explodes into screams, cursing and disbelief. I had dropped the controller in shock.*                                                                             Friend 4: *Picks up the controller and begins playing.* Yeah. I told y’all.
Me: This dude is fucked up, no ifs, ands, or buts about it.
Friend 2: Holy shit he’s fast!                                                                                    Friend 6: He wants the DICK!!!!!!                                                                            Me: Yeah.........he wants to rip OFF the dick. (I felt bad after says that, all my friends cringed)
Me: Close the fucking door!                                                                                    Friend 5: You think that’s gonna stop him!?!
Gluskin: You’d rather...........rather die than be with me?                                   Everyone: YES! 
Friend 1: A woman’s work is never done? “My name” is that true?                         Me: Not with you fuckers running around.                                                             
Me: Welp guys, we can no longer trust lockers. Also Friend 4, how long is this gonna be?                                                                                                                Friend 4: Long enough for me to go piss.                                                               Me: Fuck.
Friend 3: 12 HOURS?!?!
*The next few cutscenes/blackouts were the most grusome and uncomfortable things we had to witness. We really didn’t talk much. Just cringed and winced.* 
Me: If he doesn’t shut the fuck up, I’m leaving.
Gluskin: Whore!                                                                                                       Friends 1-7: ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS!!!!!!!!                                                      Me: Aw, guys :)
*Enters the gym.*                                                                                                     Friend 2: When will this shit end!?!                                                                         Friend 6: We should have gotten drunk for this.                                                     Me: Shots next time?                                                                                              Friend 6: Shots.                                                                                                        Friend 5: Next time?!
Me: Wiggle wiggle wiggle~                                                                          
Friend 3: Ding dong the fuckers dead.
Me: If that is the church on fire then I think we are getting close to the end.           Friend 4: Yeah we are.                                                                                            Friend 7: Spoilers.
Me: Are you kidding me? We are this close to the end and now we have to deal with this fucker?
Everyone: *Wallrider rips the guy apart.* Eeeewwwwww.
Me: Yo Upshur’s car.                                                                                                Friend 1: Steal that shit!
Me: Upload and be hunted for the rest of your life. Or not upload and let a fucked up corporation continue hurting innocent people.                                                   Friend 4: I was gonna make a joke because of the third game but then you had to get serious.
If you guys are curious on how I got this weeks tally, here is that conversation.     Friend 5: Don’t you do a tally?                                                                               Me: Yeah, it’s normally how many times I’ve said it or if it’s weird.                       Friend 2: What’d you do for the last one?                                                              Me:It was a combination of Fuck me/you/this.                                                       Friend 4: Nice. What are you gonna do for this one?                                             Friend 7: I got it! Butterfly Effect!                                                                            Friend 3: Fuck off!!!!!                                                                                              Yeah, after I made the first joke we just kept mentioning butterfly effect just to piss off Friend 3. Until Dawn really fucked with him. So here is this posts tally!
Butterfly Effect! : 79
3 notes · View notes
ograndebatata · 5 years
Text
EoA Appreciation Week 2019 - Day 2 - Melee
So... it’s coming off a day late, but here is my contribution to Day 2 of the EoA Appreciation Week on Discord.
It took more work than I expected, which is why I’m only posting it now.
Summary: After a failed attempt at freeing the kingdom of Avalor, Rafa de Alva sits before a place, thinking back on everything that had happened, and contemplating her future, which became much bleaker than she had hoped earlier in the day. 
The sharp-eyed among you will notice an inconsistency with the episode ‘Movin’ On Up’ as well as with ‘Elena and the Secret of Avalor’. To address that in advance, this fic, like the ones from Day 1, takes place in my fic continuity, in which ‘Movin’ On Up’ as a whole episode is not canon, and in which I provide an explanation for a certain element in ‘Elena and the Secret of Avalor.
I hope you enjoy it.
Please check below the cut to read it. 
Burning Flames
I failed.
Although she was too tired to wince, or even to look down, Rafa felt her spirit sink further at the thought, as if a giant hand was pushing her down into the overstuffed armchair she sat on.
No matter how many spins she tried to put on things, no matter how difficult she knew the task she had set for herself would be, no matter how fair to herself she was being, it was the only conclusion she could come to when faced with the ultimate results.
She had struck out to destroy Shuriki and bring peace back to Avalor this very morning, so that her son could grow up as safe and happy as possible. But Shuriki was still far too alive and healthy for the tastes of all but the sick bastards who wanted her tyranny to continue, and Rafa herself had barely escaped alive from her attempt.
Shuriki would keep plaguing Avalor, people would keep being arrested, tortured or executed for all sorts of reasons, the jaquins would keep being treated like ordinary street cats, and her son would be growing up in a kingdom ruled by fear.
As such, she had failed.
Her only consolation was that, as far as she could tell, Shuriki had no idea of who she had been up against. But it was a small consolation.
Not that she was ungrateful. She was thankful beyond measure to still be here for Mateo. It was bad enough he would have to grow up without a father. But what kind of world would he grow up in with Shuriki still on the throne?
A loud snap cut at her musings. Rafa's eyelids burst apart as the fireplace flashed brighter, the handle of the tamborita burning within it breaking in half. Both pieces released trails of sparks, and the bottom one fell onto the last shreds of the disguise she had worn, the remainder of it having burned away already.
Just like her hopes of a brighter future for Mateo.
Don't think like that. She told herself. You can't lose hope. And you can't give up fighting. Remember what...
Her eyes started to prickle from that thought alone.
Don't think about him. She demanded from her mind. Just don't think about him.
Thinking about him always ended with her crying. Despite her best efforts to feel happy at the thought of him, of how much she told herself to remember the happiness they had shared together, dwelling on the memory of him never failed to make her cry. It was less painful now, but not enough for her to think of the good times with a smile instead of tears.
Another snap flew from the fireplace - right on cue with a creak from a floorboard, as Rafa caught a burly figure dressed in black walking into the living room.
Her heart jumped and a jolt of adrenaline kicked her exhaustion away as Rafa reached to the side and seized the tamborita leaning the armchair. A startled yelp flew from her left as Rafa whirled toward the creaking noise and sprung up to a standing position even as she thrust out her tamborita like a sword, her free arm raised to smack it.
"It's me, Señora de Alva!" the same voice that had yelped called out, the figure raising its arms to shield itself.
Her hand froze a hairsbreadth from the tamborita as she recognized the man. Though he was dressed in the black uniform that the guards wore these days, he was one of only two royal guards Rafa had come to not fear, and the only one who was currently still alive.
"Sorry, Captain," she said.
"It's alright," Captain António Sandoval replied, though his hands remained raised. "I'm sorry I scared you.
Rafa lowered both arms before she hit her tamborita by accident. And with the gesture, what bits of strength her fear had kicked in faded away. Her insides seemingly gone, Rafa fell back into the armchair, her tamborita somehow falling on her lap along the way.
Captain Sandoval strode over to her, as firm and straight as a goal post, even though he was at home rather than performing a guard inspection. However, as he stopped by the armchair, a hint of softness flickered in his eyes.
"Are you alright?" he asked, the slightest concern creeping into his stern tone.
Though she was too exhausted to look up at him, Rafa managed to breathe out, "I'm only tired. After a good night's sleep, I'll get better."
The Captain grunted in assent as Rafa kept staring into the fire, where more bits of leather and wood vanished from the tamborita, her outfit completely gone by now. Not long from now, any bit of actual evidence that she had been the mysterious wizard who made an attempt on Shuriki's life would be gone.
Rafa only hoped Shuriki wouldn't hurt anyone in her attempts to find out.
The fear bringing two questions to her mind, she asked, "Is Mateo alright? Did anyone get hurt during the fight?"
Or worse? She couldn't help but think.
"Mateo is with Amelia, Señora de Alva. And no one got hurt."
Genuine relief trickled through Rafa at the knoweldge that her son was with the Captain's wife. Then, as she full took in the Captain's second sentence, some amazement pushed through her exhaustion, enough for her eyes to widen.
"Really? After all the destruction Shuriki and I caused?"
After all the green beams flying around? She added inwardly.
"Yes. There was great damage to the palace, but no one died or got injured. And Shuriki thinks it was just some rogue wizard challenging her."
For now, at least. She could almost hear the Captain adding, even as she added the same thing in her mind.
Still, it was good to know her plan of donning a billowing disguise that covered her whole body and crafting a tamborita from scratch for that battle was working for now. Once the fire and the potion she had poured over both things finished consuming them completely, she wouldn't be identified as that fighter.
"Thank heavens for small blessings," she replied.
Even if I would prefer for that witch to be dead.
Guilt washed over her. That task should have been up to her. And modesty aside, she had lasted a fair amount of time against the witch. But by the end of their battle, she had been so exhausted that she was sure if she hadn't used that last remnant of her strength to teleport away, she would only have gotten herself killed and left Mateo orphaned.
A shiver rippled through her. The idea of leaving Mateo orphaned gave her nightmares.
Desperate for anything to distract herself, Rafa asked the first question that came to her.
"How long did I fight her for?"
A low hum the Captain followed.
"At least three hours."
Whatever bits of strength Rafa had managed to recover flew away, to the point she swore everything around her grew darker for an instant, as if she had been about to faint but somehow managed not to.
"Three hours." Her reply was so low that even she barely heard it. "I throw everything I have at that witch for three hours, I destroy half the palace along the way, I barely manage to escape, I almost pass out from exhaustion after I do... and I barely manage to hurt her."
There was no reply from Captain Sandoval, and she wasn't looking at him anyway to see any change in his stance, but she could suddenly sense the sympathy coming off of him. Even the fire seemed to be burning more gently now, although that was likely her tiredness playing tricks on her.
"She's powerful," the Captain ground out.
"Not really," Rafa replied before she could help herself.
Sensing his puzzlement, she explained, "I mean, she is, but the real problem is that she's far more resilient than she should be."
"How so?"
Rafa barely held back an annoyed groan. Bringing up this topic of conversation really had not been a good idea. She was too tired to have any sort of conversation about the exact nature of what Shuriki was.
But simply saying 'I don't want to talk about that', felt too rude. And she saw no gentle enough way to dismiss him.
Trying to ignore her fatigue, Rafa took a deep breath to gather herself, and explained, "Petrification spells don't affect her. Freezing spells don't affect her either. And blasting spells that would blow a regular human to bits in one hit don't even scratch her. To say just a few things."
At the very least, she knew Shuriki couldn't be poisoned. Many over the years had tried to serve her poisoned meals, but half the time she hadn't even noticed the meal was poisoned, and the rest of the time she just used it as an excuse to carry out arrests or executions. And there may be more about her Rafa didn't know. Truly, all she even knew about Shuriki was that she had used some kind of extremely dark magic to boost her powers, some kind that literally seemed out of this world, some kind that normally didn't come without a heavy price.
"Can she be injured?" the Captain asked.
Rafa pushed back her annoyance once more. She really shouldn't have started up this topic of conversation. But at least, there was a marginally good answer to this question.
"Yes, she can. There were a few times when I managed to scratch her or bruise her. And she was slowing down a bit by the end of our duel. So she could be outlasted and killed through raw power and endurance. In theory."
But such a level of power and endurance were beyond her, just as much as they had been beyond her parents - at least after her father was crippled by Shuriki's magic-wielding minions. Rafa had never realized what exactly they had done to him, but she knew that his magic had never been the same after his battle with them on the day Shuriki invaded Avalor.
"What would it take?" The Captain asked.
Although he didn't move, Rafa felt as if he had actually taken a step closer, from how much his interest had grown. Again, the urge to bury the matter came over her.
Pulling effort from somewhere, she buried said urge instead and replied, "Something that could cause extreme destruction in an instant. Or one more wizard at least as powerful as me to help on the task."
Unfortunately, she didn't know where to find either. There had been a time when she had brief access to the Scepter of Light, but to her dismay, she didn't have Maruvian magic in her blood, so she couldn't wield it. And she had no idea where to even start looking for the only other object powerful enough to fit the bill. Nor did she know where to find any wizard that would fight Shuriki alongside her, not when the witch had banished or executed any magic practitioner that wasn't herself or directly empowered by her.
As if reading her thoughts, Captain Sandoval piped up, "Maybe your son can fit that bill."
Alarm and horror swelled up within her, only to be replaced with a surge of anger, to the point she rose on her seat and turned toward the Captain as her tamborita clattered to the floor, her tiredness suddenly gone.
"He's only a year old," she murmured, her voice low and threatening, and her stance tensing up as if for a fight.
The Captain grimaced as if holding back a sudden chill.
"I meant once he is old enough."
Her posture loosened the slightest edge.
"Maybe he can. But I'm not teaching him magic. I'm not even telling him that I know magic. Not for a long time, at least."
At the Captain's inquisitive look, she added, "It's for his own good. Children as a rule are terrible at keeping secrets. And I can't in good conscience teach my son something that will get him killed if it comes out, or let him know something that will get him orphaned at best if it's discovered."
The same shiver from before rippled through her. Her fear of Mateo ending up orphaned came up on a daily basis, but it never got less intense. Even in the old days, that wouldn't have been an impossibility, but with a tyrant in power, there were far too many ways for that to happen. And if Shuriki ever actually found out Rafa was Alacazar's daughter, she Mateo would only end up orphaned, because chances were no descendant of Alacazar would be allowed to live. And leaving was not an option, because while Shuriki could only fully enforce her tyranny in Avalor, there were 'substantiated rumors' that some of her followers covertly hunted down and killed 'particularly dangerous dissenters' who hid in foreign kingdoms. A woman who had taken up residence in Alacazar's abandoned house and suddenly left was bound to be treated as suspicious, even with her claim that she had only gone there because she was out of options.
For better or for worse, she was stuck in Avalor now.
Again, Captain Sandoval spoke up.
"What if he decides to learn magic on his own?"
Rafa narrowed her eyes.
"I'll cross that bridge when the time comes. It if does."
Hopefully, it never will. She added inwardly.
But it could. After all, her father's old things were still in their house's basement, where her mother had hid them before they temporarily left Avalor. Mateo could run into them eventually. Or he could find her hidden tamborita and ask what it was for.
Maybe she should just destroy those things after all.
No. She told herself, with all the finality of the Grim Reaper claiming a victim.
She couldn't do it.
If by some miracle her father came back, he would be heartbroken if he saw they were gone.
And she never knew when they might be needed. Even though none of those documents had information on how to defeat Shuriki, and none of the ingredients in the basement could be used to make a potion that would defeat her, there were still many threats they could help Rafa against.
The only problem was that Mateo could find them some day.
Like I said, I'll cross that bridge if it comes to that. She told herself.
There was a weird glint in Captain Sandoval's eyes, as if he had read her thoughts, had his own opinion on them, and said opinion disagreed with hers.
But, to her relief, he refrained from voicing it, and simply gave a respectful nod at her as he grunted in assent.
Her burst of strength fading again, Rafa crouched to pick up her tamborita and then sank back into the armchair, staring into the dancing flames. By now, the tamborita she had made for her battle with Shuriki was almost vanquished, reduced to a few bits of burning wood and leather.
Her head dropped from tiredness, and her eyes fell on her left hand, locking on the two wedding rings that rested on the proper finger.
And again, tears started to prick at her eyes.
One of those wedding rings was her own, but the other had belonged to the man she loved. The man she had hoped to have children with, to grow old with, to be with forever. Only for him to not even get to meet his son. Only for him to leave her life without even saying goodbye.
I miss you, Emiliano. She thought. I wish you were here.
But he wasn't here. He would never be here again. She had seen him vanishing right before her eyes as he had jumped in to take a vaporizing bolt that Shuriki had fired at her and their unborn son less than a year and a half ago.
One of the few things she had left from him was his wedding ring, which had somehow fallen from his finger. And her memories of him, which she treasured dearly, as many tears as they brought her.
How much longer must this go on? She mentally screamed, her gaze transfixed onto her husband's wedding ring. How much more darkness must I face before this is all over?
No answer came. But somehow, as she stared onto the ring, words her husband had told her floated into her ears. Words he had told her back when she still didn't fully trust him, back when he hadn't even been her suitor, but from a time when they had both been opening their heart to each other.
"The minute I give up fighting will be the minute I'll know I've lost."
Tears started to leak out of her eyes at the memory. But the sense of kinship she had felt at the time echoed in her mind. It had been the closest they had been at that point. Rafa had already been all too able to relate to the difficulties of keeping her hopes up when it was in such short supply. But she had wanted to do so then, and she still wanted to do so now.
Maybe they were fighting a losing battle. But if they didn't fight at all, it would truly be hopeless. And her husband might have given his life for hers and their unborn son's, and she didn't intend to throw his sacrifice away, but she knew she couldn't use it to just buckle under Shuriki's tyranny and live out her life quiet like a mouse. The only way that witch would ever be removed from power would be if enough people fought her and her followers. If, to be poetic in that awkwardly endearing way Emiliano used to go for, they kept the flames of hope burning within them.
Yes, they would still have to wait for the right chance. But they would also have to be ready to act when said chance arrived.
And whatever the future held in store for her, Rafa was determined to do that.
10 notes · View notes
sexvimpulse · 3 years
Text
Nathan: [Spots her across the room and heads over with his drink] Hello, you. [Smiles as he inclined his head, not sure whether to hug her or not] I figured this was my chance to get to know you a little better before we start filming soon. [Nods, his motives innocent but he can’t deny how gorgeous she is]
Jenneva: [Enters the event after having a rough phone call with her husband who decided not to meet her at the party. She doesn’t let it spoil her mood as she greets other members. In a coy manner, she looks around the room to see if her new costar is there before her gaze captures his] Hello, back. [Grins charmingly as he approaches her before she makes the move to greet him with a kiss on the cheek] Mmm.. what better way to know each other than with a drink in hand. [Laughs softly as she gazes up at him, finding him very attractive as she takes a sip of her drink to ease the tension] Are you here on your own tonight? [Tilts her head as she knows that many are after his attention]
Nathan: [Melts a little at her kiss, keeping in mind that she’s married] Good point. You want to sit somewhere? [Nods over to the lounge area where it’s a bit more private] I am. No one wants to date me. [Jokes as he sits and crosses his leg before taking a swig of his drink] Are you excited for this? James is just so talented. He always makes some amazing stuff. This is only my second mini series.
Jenneva: I would love to. [Follows his lead before taking a seat next to him. She crosses one leg over the other, the slit of her dress reveals her thigh] I find that hard to believe. I heard that you sweep people off their feet. [Flashes a sweet smile with him, finding it easy to be herself around him. She nods while her eyes beam with delight] I’m very excited. A little nervous about the suit though. [Laughs softly] Seems a little tight.. [Smiles mischievously as she eyes him, taking in his chiseled features] I’m more excited to work with you, though. I’ve seen a few of your films. [Bites her lip as she holds back from saying she might’ve had a crush at some point]
Nathan: Oh, believe me I think it fits you perfectly. [Speaks behind his glass] You are? [Glances at the ring on her finger as he feels like she’s flirting with him] You must be talking about Princess Diaries 2? [Tilts his head] That’s my greatest work. [Smirks as he nudges her]
Jenneva: Do you? [Bites her lower lip as his words spark something inside of her. She sips her drink to become more relaxed before laughing softly] How did you know? [Feigns shock before playfully nudging him back] I have to admit, you played a very dreamy future king. [Smiles sweetly before pretending to fan herself] I was crushed by you. [Says the term before making a face as it doesn’t sound right] Crushed? Is that right? Oh I had crush! [Giggles before blushing as she grazes his thigh with her hand]
Nathan: [Laughs as he hears her] Crushed? I think you mean you had a crush on me? [Finds her so charming as he likes the feel of her hand on him] I really had fun doing the chemistry tests with you, Jenneva. [Swallows as he speaks softly]
Jenneva: [Adores how he doesn’t make her feel ashamed of saying the wrong term] Shhh, same thing! [Grins as she finds herself moving closer without thinking about it. She shakes her head and calms down before meeting his eyes] Is that so? [Draws in her lower lip as she feels the chemistry brewing between them] I enjoyed it too. Maybe a little more than I should have. [Whispers lowly as she can’t seem to hold back whenever she meets his eyes] I’m glad that you were cast for Steve. I couldn’t picture anyone else doing it. [Murmurs before looking away as she blushes]
Nathan: [Bites his lip as he makes sure no one else sees them to protect her reputation] What do you mean by that? [Tilts his head, blushing] You’re really kind for saying that. I’m just happy to be a part of this. [Places his hand over hers]
Jenneva: Hmm.. it almost seemed real. [Admits in a warm tone before feeling his hand on hers. She doesn’t pull away as she gently covers it with her other hand] I mean it. Everyone is going to fall in love with you while you play him. [Purrs as she genuinely finds him talented and perfect for the role] Are you going to be ready for all of that attention?
Nathan: [laughs and Shakes his head] No way. You’re going to be the center of attention. Men and women are going to fall over you. [Bites his lip as he gazes at her with his bright eyes]
Jenneva: [Blushes as she shakes her head and nudges his thigh] That’s not true. You’re going to be everyone’s weakness. [Gazes at him deeply as his eyes are hard to look away from] Ugh. Stop with that look. [Laughs softly as she playfully covers his eyes with her hand before removing it] I find it very hard to believe that you don’t have a date tonight. [Tilts her head as she suddenly thinks about how she’d want to be his date if she wasn’t married] Are you one of those actors who are super private?
Nathan: What? [Chuckles as she covers his eyes] Because I’m so charming? [Teases as he has to remind himself she’s married] I am super private. [Nods] But I really am single right now. [Chews on the inside of his cheek]
Jenneva: [Squints her eyes as she smiles brightly before licking her lips] A little bit charming. [Coos before listening to him. She doesn’t know why her heart sinks a bit as she hears that he’s single] Well.. Whoever has you next is going to be very lucky. [Whispers without thinking, shifting positions until her knee is touching his] Our characters are going to be very close to each other.. so I guess I should ask if you have any boundaries or anything I should know of. [Looks up at him, still keeping the small connection to his knee as she finds herself wanting to know more about him]
Nathan: That’s very nice of you to say. [Blushes as he gazes at her] Very close.. I read some of the sex scenes.. [Chuckles] They’re pretty intense.. [Chews on the inside of his cheek] I don’t think I have any strict boundaries when it comes to acting. I like things to look pretty real.. what about you? [Pops a grape into his mouth from the table]
Jenneva: [Closes her legs together as he mentions their sex scenes, having read it with her husband only for him to be angry about it. She doesn’t think too long on it as she gazes at him] They’re very intense.. I remember one scene that involves my rope. [Smiles coyly before her eyes are fixated on his mouth] May I have a taste? [Tilts her head as she see the light sheen on his lips] I want it to look natural and real.. as if we were actual lovers. [Murmurs lowly] We can build find a way to get to know one another even more.. to build trust.
Nathan: [Groans softly] Yeah that one.. it’s pretty intense. [Chuckles as he adjusts himself a bit] Ah.. yeah. [Takes a grape and feeds her] Oh.. I’ll do my best to make it look as real as possible. HBO has some really loose guidelines. [Chuckles]
Jenneva: [Draws in a breath as she feels excited at the thought of doing that scene with him. But she quickly reminds herself of the husband she has, despite how distant they’ve been] I know they’re going to want us to rehearse those intense scenes. [Parts her lips, keeping her eyes on his as she wraps her lips around the grape and takes a bite] Mmm.. juicy. [Purrs] Will you? How will you make it look real? [Giggles as he genuinely makes her laugh] I don’t like to rehearse in front of others. It makes me anxious.. would you mind practicing scenes with me in private? [Tilts her head as she asks in an innocent way]
Nathan: [Watches her mouth as he feeds her, his dick already twitching] Hm..? Oh of course.. I get it. Very intimate scenes can be hard to get into. I’d be happy to practice with you. Just name the time and place. [Eyes her, wishing she wasn’t married but also knowing they need to be professional]
Jenneva: Yes.. and awkward with others watching. [Places her hand on his thigh without thinking about it before nodding her head and smiling warmly as he agrees] That would be perfect, Nathan. It would help me a lot. [Leans in and kisses his cheek before pulling back as she blushes softly] Ah.. I’m sorry if I’m being so touchy-feely. [Laughs softly as she runs her fingers through her hair] I might be a little buzzed.
Nathan: [Feels himself melt again at her kisses and touch] I.. I know that’s just how you are. I’ve seen it. [Smiles softly as he watches her] Looks like we’ve outlasted most of the party.. [Looks beyond the curtains] Want me to walk you to your room?
Jenneva: [Stares into his piercing blue eyes, getting lost in them as she smiles coyly] Have you been watching me? [Teases playfully before finally remembering where they are] Mmm.. Yes please. I might not make it on my own. [Laughs as she gets up and hooks her arm on his elbow. She leads him to her room before stopping at the door] I meant what I said earlier.. [Gazes up at him with her back to the door]
Nathan: [Smiles softly as he helps her, reminding himself to be professional] What did you mean? [Stuffs his hands in his pockets and eyes her]
Jenneva: [Stares up at him with bright eyes and a coy smile] That I had a big crush on you. [Eyes drift to look at the shape of his lips] Usually a girl’s crush turns out to be a huge jerk.. but you didn’t disappoint me. [Murmurs sweetly before leaning in to kiss his cheek] I can’t wait for you to be my Steve. [Pulls back as she opens the door and enters the room] Goodnight, Nathan.
Nathan: [Laughs softly] Well I’m glad I didn’t disappoint. [Smiles softly] Goodnight, Jenneva. [Bites his lip as he waves and walks off as she closes the door]
0 notes
cy4658-writes · 6 years
Text
3. Afternoon Jazz
'In the blue sky just a few specks of gray
Is the evening of a beautiful day'
Francis Duggan - A Beautiful day
I spent almost all day outside walking, wondering through the cobbled streets of northern London. The weather was perfect, warm but with a slight breeze. The trees around me were starting to become green again, spring was in the air and you could tell.
I had found the perfect place to grab a quick lunch before heading to the supermarket to stock my cupboards.
I finally got back to my apartment, took my shoes off. I was tired at last, both mentally and physically. I was feeling lazy so I only put out the stuff that needed to go on the fridge.
I wasn't hungry at all, which was strange but I thought to myself it was all because of my jet lag. It always takes me 2 to 3 days for my body to fully adjust to my new time zone and that's why I knew I shouldn't go to be before 9 pm or I'll suffer from it longer.
Checked my phone: 7:30 pm so I thought I can finally call home to let them know I arrived safe and sound.
Mom sounded happy but a bit sad that I was going to be gone for that long. Despite the fact that I was already in my 30s and being the older one of two, I will always be a kid in her eyes. We spent about 20 minutes talking and catching up on each other's day till I could no longer keep my eyes open.
'Bye mom. I promise I'll call you tomorrow' I said in the middle of a yawn 'Bye love. Be safe and get some rest' she said before hanging up.
Literally dragging my feet through the dark wooden floor, I made my way to the bathroom. I still had a bit of will power, so I decided to take a shower before going to bed. The apartment was getting cold and I still haven't gotten around of figuring out how the heater worked neither I felt like even trying at this point so, the best solution was a hot bath and 2 extra blankets I found earlier while hanging my clothes.
As I was dry blowing my hair, Morpheous decided I should call it a night. Got next to my bed, pulled my pajamas from under the pillow: an oversized Korn t-shirt that I owned since high school and a flannel pair of pants; put my hair up in a bun and proceeded to lie down. My eyes promptly closed making me fall automatically into my slumber.
°Dan's POV°
'Wake up! Come on, Dan. Wake up!'
As I open my eyes, I see Phil's face a few inches above mine, looking at me upside down.
'How long was I out?' I mumbled as I rubbed my eyes.
'About 3 hours?' he replied still looking at me from that awkward position.
'Crap' I thought to myself 'This is not going to help get my sleeping pattern back in check'
'I was going to wake you up sooner, but I heard you got up super early this morning. I didn't want to bother you' he said.
'It's fine. What's up?'
'I just finished installing Amnesia: The Dark Descent on the computer so I thought we could make a video out of it. The reviews say it's an amazing horror game and I've been meaning to play it' Phil said with that twinkle in his eyes he only gets when he is really excited.
'Ok but first, can we have something to eat? I'm starving' I could hear my stomach growl 'Chinese?' He nodded as he left the room to order.
I sit up and cracked every bone in my body; I must've slept in a very crooked position. My head was pounding and my back ached like a mother fucker 'Maybe a hot bath would help' I thought to myself, after all, it'd take a while for the food to arrive.
I wasn't keen of playing horror games at night, I always ended up super hyped and I couldn't go to bed for a few hours after but it was my fault for not setting my alarm as I took my nap. 'No' I stopped my thoughts 'No it wasn't my fault. If that stupid neighbor hadn't blasted that stupid music in the morning' I cursed as I rubbed my neck under the warm water.
I was still in a foul mood; I've been cranky since I woke up 'Maybe some comfort food would help change that'
The doorbell rang signaling the arrival of our meal. 'I'll get it, you set up the table' said Phil as he stormed out the door.
After we finished eating, put the dishes on the washing machine and I was already feeling better and ready to play.
'So, what's that game about?' I asked Phil
'Well, basically is a horror game, which means that you're in trouble from the get-go. Daniel is the name of the main character' he chuckled before proceeding 'Who's a few fries short of a Happy Meal and has absolutely no recourse to weapons or any sort of magic or special gadgets. So when the shambling monsters shamble by, you have no choice but to avoid them. Take them head-on, and you either go as crazy as Lovecraft's Charles Dexter Ward or get slaughtered. Pretty rad, right?' he said with a giant grin on his lips.
'Oh fucking great' I was having some horrendous Outlast flashbacks.
We sat down and we were all ready to start, I turned on the camera:
'Hello Dan and Phil horror friends' Yelled Phil with excitement
'Here we are, yet again, ready to play something that will keep me up for THE REST OF MY TORTUOUS LIFE' I said
Phil proceeded to explain the game as I rolled my eyes and made a snarky comment here and there. After a battle of Rock, Paper, Scissors, I lost so it was my turn to be the first one to play. I was not thrilled.
The game was keeping me on edge, I really don't like going in without even knowing what it was REALLY about. Of course, that was Phil's plan all along as he gets some odd thrill when he hears me scream my lungs out.
All of a sudden, everything was calm, I knew that something horrible was about to happen yet it caught me off guard.
'WHAT THE FUCKING HELL WAS THAT, PHIL. GOD DAMN IT. THIS FUCKING GAME SUCKS DICKS. I HATE IT I
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE
ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT'  
I screamed like there was no tomorrow. I could feel the glasses from the windows shake as my voice echoed around the room. No sound proof tiles could have ever muffled the sounds I was making
°Your POV°
'What the hell?!' I was awaken by scream. 'What the fuck is going on?!'
It sounded like someone was shouting right beside me. I couldn't make up what the person was saying but I could tell that it was someone screaming out of terror. My eyes were wide open.
The screaming stopped.
I run to my windows and shut them closed. 'Yeah, because someone is going to go all Spiderman to the 4th floor' I shook my head at how silly my precaution measure was.
I wasn't able to see at all, on the heat of the moment I jumped off bed and I didn't even bother to put on my glasses, without them I'm pretty much blind as a bat. Everything looked blurry as I was running into every single piece of furniture in my way. 'Fuck'
The quiet murmuring of the busy street beneath me started filling my flat once again.
As I was swinging my way back to my room when I hear it again.
A crude scream but now I could make up some words 'Oh no, not again, please don't let me die'
The noises were coming from my next door neighbor's apartment.
'What should I do?' My mind run a million miles an hour 'Shall I call 911? No Y/N, that only works in the US' I was panicking.
Without even realizing, I stormed out of my apartment and started banging on my neighbor's door. What was I even going to do? Was I going to get murdered by whoever was attacking this person? I didn't even know but a rush of adrenaline came over me and I kept banging till someone opened the door.
'Oh my god, are you alright?' I yelled at the tall person that answered the door 'I heard someone screaming, is everyone in there ok?' I said, slightly hyperventilating.
As I was trying to focus my eyes on this person, I hear a loud laugh 'What the hell?!'
'I'm sorry' he said 'Everything is alright, I think we might have gotten a little carried away with a game I'm playing with my friend'  he said as he was trying to hold back a laugh
'Are you fucking kidding me right now?!' I got mad 'I thought something horrible was happening in there, you fucking asshole!' I was fuming now as the asshole kept on laughing.
It might have been a laughable sight, I must admit. Me, with my rattled hair, unable to shit and hyperventilating. What a picture!
'I didn't mean to b...' he was saying as I interrupt him
'You know what? I hope you fucking get kill, you goddamn prick! The audacity you have to even laugh in my face. Screw you' I hollered as I was slamming my front door shut.
'God damn, bastard' I muttered as I went in my room
°Dan's POV°
I went back to our gaming room; Phil looked at me and asked 'What was that all about?'
'Apparently, our neighbor thought that someone was getting killed in here and came to our rescue' I chuckled 'I nervously laugh in her face and got upset. She hoped I got killed tonight for being a prick'
'I think we may need to buy more sound proof tiles' I told Phil as we resumed with our game
a/n: Sorry, I got a little carried away here
8 notes · View notes
khalix-hyetology · 7 years
Text
Lynn and Blake’s relationship
I realised I didn’t do a post about Lynn and Blake’s relationship. This is a very important relationship. Not only does it propel the storyline of Outlast 2, it also gives center to both Lynn and Blake as characters. Lynn and Blake relationship has survived since Fourth Grade. If anyone is as old as me right now you will understand it takes patience, perseverance and genuine emotions for a relationship or even friendship to last this long. I do believe that Lynn and Blake are in their late 20s or early 30s. So, they have known each other for possibly 20 years or even more. 
Aside from the length, this is the first canon in-game relationship we got from Red Barrels. Miles is single and Waylon only mentions Lisa and their kids. This game is centred around this relationship and marriage to a wide extent. It deals with emotions and concepts related to loyalty, trust and dedication. So, this relationship is very important to the whole narrative of Outlast 2. 
Lynn and Blake know each other since 4th grade. We know from the school segments that Jessica may have started having a crush on Blake. However, it was Lynn and Blake’s relationship that became more complex and surpassed friendship. It is true that perhaps they were initially only very good friends. They may have had an intimacy that they couldn’t always explain. When we play the like segments of the school we know that Blake did not kiss Lynn in the Beauty and Beast production. He stated that he is saving it for the special night. Lynn then asked Jessica to ask him if he did kiss someone. Jessica went on trying to kiss Blake herself but seeing his discomfort she actually turned it into nothing but a play. This shows shyness on both of them. This may have been where their feelings were starting to really come forth.
Though, there were signs of their relationship and feelings a bit earlier. When Jessica is talking to Blake via messenger she mentions Lynn is waving at Blake. Blake immediately turns his attention. It is an eagerness that is related to a young love starting to grow. It shows that despite the chemistry that Jessica does sometimes share with Blake it ultimately leads to friendship. With Lynn the chemistry is slow to build but also more concrete. The attempting kiss scene and messenger scene show that Lynn and Blake may have had always a deeper understanding of each other. Unlike, the more fast paced Jessica, Lynn and Blake are slower. It is this similarity that also binds them. They have strong, slow feelings. Lynn may have noticed this from before but perhaps never spoke about it due to knowing Jessica having a crush on Blake. However, as the days went by it was becoming obvious, even to Jessica, that Lynn and Blake had feelings for each other. The attention, the shyness and the eagerness all surmounted to it.
There is also canon information that Lynn and Blake supported each other through Jessica’s “suicide.” Blake must have felt horrible not telling Lynn. Yet, he must have been genuinely happy to comfort her. Blake and Lynn have this shared childhood trauma. The sharing of trauma is something they do support each other through. Canonically, it is implied that Lynn helped Blake when he suddenly became an orphan. Blake looks to have taken it as divine punishment for what happened to Jessica. He sounds pretty casual when he says his mother died and after that his father just did. At this trying time, Lynn was there for him. This made their young love become even more potent. It matured and took more sturdier roots. 
The lack of sexual intimacy, further along their marriage, could be because of Blake’s guilt towards Jessica. He married Lynn but he never confessed what really happened to Jessica. Lynn may have also been busy with work. The career paths they both took also is imprinted on their shared childhood trauma. Blake is a cameraman who can record Jessica’s suicide in the game. He can record things and catch them as they happen. It is his way of helping reveal the truths he feels he cannot. Lynn becomes a journalist to seek the truths she did not know. In this way, they are still operating on their shared trauma. It is not that I feel that Lynn forgets Jessica. In the helicopter, she says that she hasn’t thought of Jessica in ages. Though she smiles and also seems to want to avoid the conversation. It is quite possible that Lynn hallucinates about Jessica in Temple Gate as well. Perhaps, she even suspected Loutermilch and knew somewhat that the teacher was after Jessica. This means that many things about them is linked to their friendship to Jessica. Though it is such a traumatic event that they don’t speak of it. So, their relationship is somewhat strained. 
It is this strain that also elucidates how strong their bond is. Blake and Lynn do not stress or demand sex unfairly. They do not act mean to each other for the lack of it. Even with gaps in their communication they are still trying to be a couple and Blake spends the entire time in the game looking for Lynn. This shows the amount of devotion and dedication they have for each other. Blake trusts Lynn to ask her where they are going when Lynn first escapes the cultists. Lynn also trusts Blake when she is in trouble. They know they can be in each other’s lifeline. Even when Blake knows he may not be the father of Lynn;s child he wants to help her out. Even if Lynn is not sure she is an actual mother she wants to protect a child with Blake. There is no accusations of infidelity. No strange voice overs of condemnation. Either Red Barrels overlooked this or wanted to show how equal partners in this marriage Lynn and Blake was. 
In the end, we see that though Lynn is tough and sturdy she can also be caring and affectionate. Her devotion to a child that may not be hers or even real but she trusts it is the right thing to do. We also see despite Blake’s calm and kind nature he can also be tough as nails. This relationship is built on equality, communication and understanding. Despite what people may say, I believe the narrative itself shows that Blake did not choose Lynn as a substitute for Jessica. I do believe his love for Jessica was platonic. I am not saying people cannot shop Blake and Jessica because that can happen with different contexts. I do believe that Lynn and Blake are a completely canon relationship. They didn’t merely date and marry each other for shared trauma or coping. They communicated well before and after massive events in their lives and realise they fit and love perfectly for each other. 
50 notes · View notes
auburnfamilynews · 4 years
Link
Tumblr media
Mary Hattler/File
Where success is built from failure
War Eagle Auburn fans! Welcome back for yet another week of us all trying to make sense of where our rooting interests most benefit the Tigers. This week, we’ve got what feels like a light plate in terms of where we can serve to benefit within the SEC, with both Alabama and LSU being off prior to the Game of the Century of the Year. That being said, we’ve got some real hate to direct towards Jacksonville, Florida this weekend and a night game in Jordan-Hare to get to. With that in mind, let’s figure this out...
Ole Miss at Auburn
Normally I’d use this space to go down a laundry list of reasons why we all hate Ole Miss. Which, if we’re being honest, sure we all hate everybody we play to a certain extent, but hating Ole Miss requires a lot of work that I just don’t have in me. Also because our losses to Ole Miss typically come on some of the more forgettable seasons in Auburn Football history. Except one.
On November 8, 2003 the Ole Miss Rebels, ranked 20th in the country came to the Plains with a quarterback by the name of Eli Manning in tow, a national television audience from CBS, and hopes for an SEC Championship. Meanwhile Auburn, ranked in the preseason at #6 in the country, came into the game at 5-3, attempting to salvage a potentially lost year and stay hopeful for a chance at getting to Atlanta. This was set to be a tremendous showdown between the greatest Ole Miss quarterback in a generation (literally) and an Auburn offense that had found some rhythm after an 0-2 start, and featured a fierce backfield of Carnell “Cadillac” Williams, Ronnie Brown, and Brandon Jacobs.
As the game went back and forth into the 4th quarter, Auburn had pulled ahead 20-17 until less than 3 minutes to go when Ole Miss punched it through to take a 24-20 lead. 3 plays into Auburn’s next, and last drive, a sophomore receiver named Ben Obomanu caught a screen pass and raced 51 yards to the 10 yard line. Auburn was within striking distance with plenty of time and a chance to contend deep into November (somehow) in the SEC West.
3 plays later, on 3rd and goal, a lesser player...no, a lesser person, would have let this moment define their career. Ben Obomanu had dropped a wide open ball in the south end zone that would’ve been a huge momentum clinching game for a team in desperate need of it. Sadly, the player responsible for getting us into position to win the game was at the center of blame for why we lost.
Obomanu grew up a few minutes after that moment, choosing to face the media and take ownership over what happened, like someone with maturity beyond their years. Any feeling of finger pointing in the locker room wouldn’t stand up to the integrity and character that Obomanu showed that day.
My question to you all is this...when you think of Ben Obomanu, is the Ole Miss game the first thing that comes to your mind? Because I have a few moments that far outweigh him coming up short that night in Jordan-Hare.
I think about a screen pass early against Alabama a few weeks later, letting the Tide know they were never going to have hope at momentum as we took out a season of frustrations on a hapless Crimson Tide. The hurt and pain from weeks earlier in the south end zone had been redeemed.
I think of the wide receiver who never got the picture painting like Courtney Taylor against LSU in 2004, but managed to lead the undefeated and uncrowned 2004 Auburn Tigers in TD receptions
I think about opening the floodgates on the opening drive of the 2005 Iron Bowl with a TD reception. I think about a flawlessly executed reverse go 45 yards to pay dirt, giving him his second score of that wonderful afternoon. Both of those touchdowns being celebrated in the south end zone served to further distance any shred of failures on that same part of grass 2 years prior.
I think of the Selma native getting drafted in the 7th round of the NFL Draft by the Seattle Seahawks and lasting the better part of 7 seasons in the NFL.
I think of the man that upon retirement chose to go back to school to work and ultimately obtain his law degree.
I think about the guy sitting in Brother Chette’s office as I walked into it, a freshman, non-student athlete, hurting and in need of encouragement and going to one of the few people on Auburn’s campus who had a personal relationship with me and cared. Brother Chette was on the phone when I walked in. And there was Ben, a real, legitimate leader in the locker room and FCA, with a smile on his face as genuine as I’d ever seen. Ben had no reason to care about me or talk to me. He was a senior football player who I viewed as a legend. And yet there was this humble kid from Selma, just shooting the breeze without a care in the world with a broken, depressed, and lost kid trying to figure too much out all at once. I think about that act of kindness most.
So on this 2019 version of Ole Miss week, let’s remember Ben Obomanu, a sophomore who put us in position and then made a mistake. Let’s remember that a moment in time doesn’t have to be the memory we hold closest by the time this brief moment in the players’ lives are through. And let’s believe that for every painful moment we had in Gainesville and Baton Rouge in October, that the defining moment of this team is in front of them. They haven’t played their best game...YET.
War Damn Eagle.
(Also if you’d like to read more detail about that 2003 Ole Miss game, please go read this excellent piece from Wesley Sinor a few years back.)
Florida vs. Georgia (Jacksonville)
Ah Jacksonville. The most spacious parking lot in America. This is a super fun game to go to if you hate both of these teams, even if you’re dressed in a Gene Chizik inspired shacket!
Even if it means you end up losing a pain of sunglasses to the Atlantic all for the sake of a joke. :(
ANYWAY...common sense, decency, and the downright ethical and moral thing to do in this game is to pull for Georgia...to absolutely get their ass kicked. I know I know...we all hate Dan Mullen for somehow getting a Mississippi State problem to somehow become an Auburn issue in 2010. And that loss a few weeks back still stings. And there’s even some logic in wanting to be the ones to ruin Georgia’s season by handing them their second loss, all but ensuring they miss a chance at the national championship for (as of 11/1/19 at 5:03 PM) the 14,182nd day...not including roughly 23 hours and 49 minutes.
I mean, sure! That sounds great! But let’s think about this...what if we don’t end up winning that game? You really want that kind of pressure on this bunch right now? Wouldn’t it also be pretty great to see a deflated Georgia walk into Jordan-Hare with nothing to play for and not a care in the world because of some false sense of entitlement that they’ve had for 14,182 days, 23 hours, and 51 (now) minutes? I want to watch this team get buried, dug up, kicked, and buried again.
GO GATORS!
Seriously, don’t pull for Georgia. These people deserve bad things, and they deserve them all the time.
Mississippi State at Arkansas
Y’all I’m gonna be honest with you and say that you can go ahead and root for whoever you want here...just know that one or both of these coaches will probably not be coaching at either of these schools soon. For that reason the comedy of it seems like State winning and maybe getting their fanbase hopeful is the best way to crush a soul, since Arkansas has been numbed to all of this for a while.
Hail State?
UAB at Tennessee
I picked Tennessee to win this game because they’re playing better. They should be able to outlast a C-USA team, right? But OH MAN am I pulling hard for the Blazers here. There’s few things that would make me happier than seeing UAB find a way to beat Tennessee. And CAN YOU IMAGINE THE T-SHIRTS IF THEY WERE TO DO IT BY MORE POINTS THAN THE TIDE?!? Please let it be so.
GO BLAZERS!
Have a different perspective on where our rooting interests lie this weekend or want to throw in some games of your own that you have some personal hate invested into? Feel free to share in the comments section below!
from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2019/11/2/20944319/rootability-index-vol-4
0 notes
tak4hir0 · 4 years
Link
It starts with someone posting an AWS press release in the company chat. “AWS Announces FooBar,” the headline reads. The announcement skirts around technical details, as usual, but contains a worrying amount of buzzwords that overlap with the company’s product. Somebody responds with a grimace emoji 😬. Others reply with all the ways AWS FooBar is totally not like our product and, anyway, ours is better, and, and… The flurry of replies betrays their true collective emotion: We’re screwed. They’re right to be worried. As a marketing consultant to enterprise software startups for the past six years, I’ve helped companies navigate and succeed in this scenario at least eight times.[1] In this article I explain why every software startup should be prepared for this scenario, why the initial panic is justified, and how to position products against alternatives from “Big Cloud” (AWS, Azure, GCP). Every Software Startup Should Be Prepared to Compete Against AWS, Azure, and GCP Even if you’re not competing with Big Cloud today, there’s a good chance you will soon. This is especially true if your product is in the serverless, stream processing, machine learning, containerization, IoT, data warehousing, or batch processing space. Those are the fastest growing cloud services—according to a survey from Rightscale—and Big Cloud companies know it. Big Cloud companies earn the bulk of their revenues from metered billing of storage, compute, and streaming. Having turned those infrastructure workloads into commodities, the Big Cloud companies are in a race to provide differentiated products higher in the stack just to bring more customers onto their infrastructure. That is evident in the sheer size of their product portfolios and pace of product releases: AWS has 182 products and made 83 major product announcements (launches or major releases) in 2018.[2] You Should Worry When Big Cloud Launches a Similar Product There is a tendency, upon learning of a Big Cloud intrusion, to bury our heads. Internal emails will include explanations for why the Big Cloud product “is not really competitive,” “is not as good as ours,” and “can only take a small piece of the market.” Maybe those things turn true, but there are good reasons to at least take the competition seriously: 1. Resource Imbalance Big Cloud companies can win by brute force: Pouring obscene amounts of resources into engineering, marketing, and sales until they outrun or outlast the competition. It won’t be enough to have a better product by a smidgen, or to have a small head start in the market. 2. Complicated Relationship Startups participating in Big Cloud partner programs, such as the AWS Partner Network, will find themselves sharing sensitive information and valuable resources with the competition. For them, leaving the program would mean relinquishing a potentially significant acquisition channel. Meanwhile, Big Cloud wouldn’t flinch at losing a startup partner, and therefore has no incentive to be prudent with the information it obtains. 3. Broad Reach and Influence AWS can get on stage and influence a thousand people, or send an email and influence a hundred thousand, or play a TV commercial and influence millions. Using their broad reach and brand recognition, Big Cloud can influence how people perceive the market and make their decisions. 4. Captive Audience Even better than a reachable audience is a captive audience. Big Cloud companies have millions of users, already running on their platforms and familiar with their products. They can reach this audience to upsell and cross-sell products in a few clicks. 5. Pricing The objective for most Big Cloud products is not to make profit, but to bring customers onto the platform and increase infrastructure usage (compute, storage, streaming). Therefore the products can be users as loss leaders: Priced at very low or no cost, provided they drive increased infrastructure usage. For startups, at best this eliminates the option to compete on price, at worst it forces them to lower prices with no way to make up for it. 6. Easy Access Engineers at companies already running on AWS can buy, deploy, and integrate an AWS product before their coffee cools. Metered billing means there are no upfront costs or negotiations. Being on the same platform means seamless integration between tools and services. 7. Early decision In the past, decision makers had to choose whether to build a solution in-house or purchase software from a vendor. Today, the low prices, easy access, and brainshare of Big Cloud offerings create a new option for decision makers: Use what their cloud platform is offering. It used to be “buy vs build.” Now it’s “buy vs build vs big cloud.” For software startups, this means they can be ruled out even earlier in the buying process, before any conversation, evaluation, or feature comparison takes place. How to Win Against Big Cloud Prepare Attend trade shows, seek out insiders who might tip you off about looming competition, and generally keep an ear to the ground. Advance warning will allow you to dredge a wider moat, prepare a response, and avoid company-wide panic when the press release hits. Having a pre-emptive strategy for competing against Big Cloud will make it possible to ride the initial wave of hype following their announcement, leveraging their campaign to bring attention to your own product, and pulling away from other startups who will be caught by surprise. With the right strategy and execution, the launch of a competitive product from Big Cloud could be turned into a positive inflection point for the startup and its market. Even if you are not competing against Big Cloud now, good preparation will improve reaction time and chances of succeeding when the moment comes. If your product even remotely encourages more use of cloud compute, storage, or streaming, then you should prepare. Support Multi-Cloud According to the same survey by Rightscale, 84% of enterprise organizations have applications and workflows scattered across on-prem, private cloud, and public cloud environments. If you are “the #1 solution for X on AWS,” and AWS launches a solution for X, you become a distant second choice. If your product works across a variety of environments, then it will remain a viable—and probably better—option for buyers that want to solve an organization-wide problem. Those buyers will need a solution that works across their entire infrastructure, not just the part on AWS. Support for multi-cloud and hybrid environments is one of the most common reasons I hear from decision makers for why they bought software instead of using the cloud offering. Multi-cloud and hybrid-environment support could be a decisive advantage over Big Cloud offerings. And, unlike a small lead in features, this advantage will last a while: Big Cloud companies have little incentive to make products for other platforms. With options like Kubernetes and Gravity, adding that capability to products may not require a monumental engineering effort. Think Twice Before Open-Sourcing While it helps with awareness and credibility, open-sourcing products in whole or in part lowers the barrier to entry for competitors. For any new and sufficiently popular open-source product X, it is trivial for Big Cloud to introduce a “Managed X” offering, as AWS did with Elasticsearch, or to pair it with their security products and package it as “X for Enterprise,” as AWS did with MongoDB and as Google did with Kubernetes. (The Kubernetes story has a few fun twists in it: First, the company Docker released an open-source containerization product. By the time they launched a paid container management service, Google already developed and open-sourced their own container management solution, Kubernetes, which won the market. Then, after Docker released an enterprise solution for managed containers, Google beat Docker once again with the launch of Google Kubernetes Engine.) For example, when AWS launched a “Fully managed, scalable, and secure” packaging of the open-source software Elasticsearch, it led the makers of that software to admit: “… Amazon competes with us for potential customers, and while Amazon cannot provide our proprietary software, the pricing of Amazon’s offerings may limit our ability to adjust the price of our products.” The questionable benefits of open-core business models, combined with the vulnerability it opens to competition from Big Cloud companies—who are not ashamed of taking advantage—is why I advise companies to guard their product and not go open-source, or to limit their vulnerability if they already open-sourced, as Confluent did by changing their licensing when AWS pulled the same maneuver with Kafka, the open-source software from Confluent. Position Against the Category, Not the Product Now that companies decide between “build vs buy vs big cloud” before doing side-by-side comparisons of products, startups must position their product as a better alternative or complement to the entire “big cloud” category of solutions. Don’t talk about who has the better features. First, given the engineering resources available to Big Cloud companies, any feature advantage will be short-lived. Second, buyers make feature comparisons much later in the buying process, after ruling out the majority of options based on their perception—not features—of those products. So why is your product better than Big Cloud, despite the (likely) higher cost and time to deploy? Here are common answers I have found from my interviews with buyers, that may or may not apply to your product: Works Anywhere with Anything “Our product deploys, runs, and integrates with applications on any infrastructure. Organizations running applications hybrid or multi-cloud environments can use the product without restrictions and without consolidating to one cloud provider.” Self-Service for Non-Technical Users “Products from Big Cloud providers often serve the users closest to infrastructure work, such as engineers, operators, architects, developers. Our product lets non-technical users such as […] do their work without being blocked by or burdening technical teams.” End-to-End Solution “Our product is an end-to-end solution that does not require engineering work to glue parts and other systems together. Big Cloud products act more like building blocks that work well with other parts of their platform, but are not that useful or even usable on their own.” Purpose-Built “Our product was made—and continues to be developed—to solve the unique needs of your industry. It integrates seamlessly with people, workflows, tools, and systems you already have, such as […].” Expert Partners “In addition to documentation and examples relevant to your use cases, we provide expert support and consultation to all customers, regardless of their size.” Customer-Driven Development “We are laser-focused on making the best product for […], constantly making improvements based on input and emerging needs of people like you.” If you’re still unsure how to explain your advantage over Big Cloud products, ask the buyers who chose you over AWS, Azure, or GCP, like I did for Gravitational and for Netlify. After developing new positioning to compete against Big Cloud, turn it into new or updated messaging, align the company on that messaging, and bring it to market through your sales and marketing channels. Conclusion The entry of Big Cloud is not always a death knell, but it’s serious. Startups that acknowledge the threat from Big Cloud companies, prepare accordingly, and react with the right strategy and sense of urgency could not only survive but thrive. Maybe even long enough to be acquired by one. [1] An incomplete list: I was consulting FoundationDB when AWS launched Aurora; Scalyr when AWS launched its Elasticsearch service (often used for searching through logs); Gravitational when Google launched GKE; Domino Data Lab when AWS launched Sagemaker; Etleap when AWS launched Glue; Nexla when Google acquired Alooma and as AWS launched AWS Lake Formation; Netlify when Google acquired Firebase and when GitHub (owned by Microsoft) launched Actions. In one case I saw things from the other side: When the startup Particle launched their IoT solutions, I was consulting AT&T on launching their own IoT platform and marketplace… True to form, AWS also launched an IoT platform that year. [2] Product counts are approximate, and do not include general business product groups such as G Suite or Office 365. Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. ◼ PS - Liked this article? I write one every month or so, covering lessons learned on B2B startup growth. Don't miss the next one:
0 notes
Text
Survey #76
“yeah, you’re a crazy bitch, but you fuck so good.”
do you ever think about what went wrong in your last relationship? we each made mistakes, and i feel more certain of this now that jason and i have talked. i, for one, gave up on life while still being alive. on jason's end, he, too, gave up on me instead of trying to rebuild me. do you know your best friend’s middle name? yes, colleen. she goes by her middle name, but her "real" name is elizabeth. you have to get a piercing, what do you get? vertical labret on my lip. would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler? a standard poodle. ever driven into the ghetto to buy drugs? no. mom denies it and got pissed once when i mentioned it, but we once lived in sharpsburg, and that was totally the ghetto. do you own a gun? as i'm mentally ill/have had suicidal tendencies, i legally can't. my mother even can't because i live with her. would you rather sleep with someone or alone? with someone. while it's less comfortable, it's comforting. are there any songs that remind you of falling snow? or any songs that remind you of winter time but are not necessarily about that? dude, i have noooo idea why, but for whatever reason, "dreamer" by ozzy osbourne definitely brings to mind winter for me personally. is there anything coming out soon (books, albums, movies, video games) that you're looking forward to? hmmm, i don't think so... but then again, i live under a rock and am not informed on what's coming out so- wAIT IS OUTLAST 2 OUT YET what is something you wish you had learned earlier that you know now? how would this have helped you if you'd known it then? i don't know if there's anything, honestly... i used to say i wish i'd known jason would leave me, but i guess i don't now. because i loved, beyond explanation. i loved with such a naive innocence, and i don't regret that. when you’re interested in someone, do you let them know? according to my history, i do. what was the last compliment you received? someone liked my hair. i got compliments on it non-stop at the hospital. do you have any siblings? are they older / younger? 
 including half-siblings, tiffany, misty, bobby, katie, and ashley are older. nicole is younger. have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? it has been pierced before, and i plan on doing it again very soon. favorite shoes you have EVER owned? the finding nemo once i had as a kid were fly as FUCK allergic to? pollen and silver favorite fruit? strawberries who was your first prom date? jason where did you live the first time you moved out of your parent’s house? i lived with jason, amanda, and jacob. if you were to have sex right now, would you use a condom? in almost all cases, yes. the only situation where i wouldn't is if i was with jason at this very moment and he wanted to have sex, and he didn't have any. just apply the pull out method, and besides that, i shouldn't be ovulating right now, so i wouldn't get pregnant. do you think it’s bad to have sex at your age? no, i'm an adult. have you ever wanted to get drunk and take your mind off of everything? i sure have. how long do you think you will live? eh, probably early 80s, maybe even 70s... i'm not the healthiest person, mentally and physically. have you ever been stung by a bee? i have not. do you like the snow? very much so. how old are you? do you feel as old as you are? i am 21, but i certainly don't feel it. does the quality of a video, on youtube or a television, matter to you? at least very mildly, sure. it needs to be watchable at least. do you tend to listen to music that embraces your mood or does music dictate your mood? is it a little bit of both? i tend to embrace my mood with the music i pick. are there any books or films that have influenced your philosophy? if so, is there one you could name in particular? "johnny got his gun," i r8 8/8 what is the cutest animal? meerkat pups, oh my GOSH what seasons seems most fitting to your personality? in what ways and why? autumn, because everything is dying. :'D do you think you would be a good parent? i don't know, honestly... blue, black, or red pens; or another color? black do you like watching people play video games? yes, i do!! idk why, it's just entertaining to me. when was the last time you swam in a pool?  years ago what are your parents views on sex? err, in regards to what about it exactly? have you ever babysat before? yeah, for the neighbor. if your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away what would you do?  i'd be pretty devastated, honestly. if your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do?  well that'd be a problem, as she's married to a man. i'd be pretty concerned about what she'd do. have you ever dreamed about your wedding? i have. do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of facebook? nope. j and my pictures are still up there. ever plaigarised? no. i have too much respect as a writer. do you edit your profile pictures before posting them?  i do minor adjustments, of course. i was a digital photography student, we know aaall about the mandatory deception of editing. :P what's your middle name?  marie what's your wallpaper on your phone? lock screen is the bogeyman from "silent hill: downpour," but the artwork is from "anne's story." home screen is pyramid head from the white hunter comic. favorite tv commercial? the dirty mr. clean commercial mAKES ME SOB YA'LL SHOULDA SEEN ME THE OTHER DAY I WAS DONE what is your favorite type of cat?  hmmm. persians, sphinxes, ragdoll, etc... what religion were you raised in? are you still that religion, if you had one? catholicism, and no. i'm christian now. would you ever consider getting dreadlocks? nooooo. how many times is your cartilage pierced in your ears?  once. do you prefer to spend more time with your SO, family, or friends? why? in my history, my s.o. jason really just touched this part of my brain that just REALLY made me happy. if you see a homeless person asking for money, do you give them any? i'm not going to lie, no. i don't know that person, and WAY too many assholes are deceptive little shits. what will immediately disqualify a potential SO?  smoking, doing drugs, excessive drinking, abusive past, and i'm certain there are others i'm forgetting... i am honestly VERY picky. when was the last time you really panicked? when i overdosed a few days back. do you ever get eczema? nope. have you ever witnessed a serious physical fight? i have not. is there anyone you would do literally anything for?  honestly, yes. i'd kill for jason. it's very unhealthy and i wish the mentality would stop, but i honestly can't do much about it... do you enjoy corn on the cob?  i do. in your opinion, what's the ideal age to start having children? about mid-20s. what's the longest you've ever slept in one go? it HAD to be almost 12 hours. jason and i were up almost the entire night being horny whores and when i fell asleep, i was GONE. have you ever dated someone with an accent different than yours? no. does caffeine affect you, or not so much?  not very much at all. would you ever want to follow down the career path of your parents? no. but then again, they both dropped out of/didn't go to college, so... guess i'm not too far off. do you think “sleeve tattoos” are a good idea? *sexual moaning* if you have any tattoos, do you reckon you might regret them when you get older and have children? i sure won't. is there anything in particular that your parents argue about? what? just gonna say there's a reason they're divorced. do you act differently around the person you like? i mean, i'm happier. kissed someone you didn’t like?  on the cheek, never on the lips. ran a red light? no. experienced love at first sight?  nope. pointed a gun at someone?  no. had a gun pointed at you? no. dumped someone?  yep. lied to avoid a ticket? no. ridden in a helicopter? no. made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? i woulda preferred you to rip my fucking heart out. eaten snake?  omg no. puked on amusement ride?  no. been in a band? nope. been in handcuffs? i've been in full-body shackles on one occasion. i was going from the mental hospital to the court. what is your favorite breakfast food? pancakes. who do you (romantically) love? my ex, jason. do you enjoy kissing?  sure, yeah. what about making out? i r8 8/8 m8 where are you most ticklish? MY FEET HOLY SHIT where do you want to get married? gothic-styled mansion or similar building pls do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? yes. have you ever slow danced to a song you didn't know? no. if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? south africa. i want to photograph the meerkats at the kalahari meerkat project. describe your perfect partner. his name's jason. would you prefer to be a vampire or a werewolf? vampire, i think. the werewolf transformation seems painful. most embarrassing moment?  borderline having a panic attack because i was like really close to having an orgasm for the first time and i didn't understand what was happening to my body lmao. jason was super cute and sweet about it though and helped me calm down. would you ever consider getting married?  i want to get married. if it were possible, what exotic animal would you keep as a pet? if it weren't so bad for them, i'd totally have a meerkat. what is your least favorite thing about your appearance?  my stomach. ew. have you ever had a bonfire on the beach?  no, but that sounds cool. do you listen to music while driving?  it has to be VERY quiet. or else i can't concentrate. have you ever received an autograph from a celebrity?  no. can you honestly say you’ve been drunk before? i have. is there a certain color of eyeshadow you prefer, if you wear eyeshadow? black as my soul. would you ever do something you didn't enjoy sexually just to please your partner? depends on what, really. like there are some situations where i'd absolutely draw the line, but here's an example: i don't like oral, but i guess i'd give it sometimes if it made him happy. when was the last time you watched south park?  probably not since j and i were together... i remember one occasion where we chilled in my room for hours watching it. are you italian? no. where’s the nearest game stop near you?  in rocky mount, by wal-mart. do you have any best friends that you only know online? i guess i still consider mini at least a very close friend, despite not talking much. i have other very close friends too, but not best, i guess. if you could, would you want to stay young forever? yes. being elderly is just, in general, inconvenient. not saying old people are, just the state of being old is. are you interested in anime? no more, no less than the usual person. hogwarts house: just took a quiz, and apparently i'm a mix of all? i very well coulda been off, 'cuz there was a lot of harry potter terminology that i don't know... what’s “out of bounds” for you during sex?  do. not. hit me aggressively. main thing. hickies - get ‘em or give ‘em?  i enjoy getting 'em, enjoy giving 'em. are you okay with rough sex?  hell yeah. i think i'd prefer soft and sensual more frequently, but i'm not totally opposed to just fucking. how big was the biggest dick you’ve ever seen? was it in a porn or in real life?  this survey sure took a sexual turn. but i've only ever seen one penis, so... how do you feel about daddy dom/little girl roleplaying?  nO JUST NO do you have any sexual regrets? i regret not going all the way with j. he was my first love, and he deserved to know me in every single way possible. have you had anal?  no, and i don't want it. do you like to spank/be spanked? i like being spanked, but not too hard. do you like teasing or would you rather get straight to the point? tEASE TEASE TEEEEEAAAAAASE are you able to have emotionless sex? fuck that. sex should be the epitome of physical displays of affection, imo. does penis size really matter?  honest to god, i don't care. it's not like a man can choose how "well-off" he is. describe an orgasm. oh wow. i don't actually think i've ever properly orgasmed, but i was extremely close once and totally panicked. it felt totally otherworldly, and i honestly felt like screaming, puking, and just exploding all at once??? i was so scared at first, but as i calmed down, shit was awesome. what’s the longest time you’ve had sex for? never had sex, but done sexual things for hours... like, all night. if you could change the person you lost your virginity to, would you? i would change the fact i didn't lose my virginity to jason. what’s something sexual that you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up liking? anr/abf surprised the FUCK out of me. i honestly thought it'd be really awkward and uncomfortable, but it's honestly an extremely stimulating and motherly sensation okay i'll stop before this turns into a pornish thing. but basically it taught me ya can't totally judge some things 'til you try it. give your best sex advice, GO. uhhh. ever tried sucking on your partner's tongue while making out? turned my ex the fuck on, at least. would you say you’re good in bed?  have evidence i was good enough. do you like gagging on cock/having someone gag on your cock? why? i just choked on my fucking drink. but no, because i like air. when it comes to oral, are you gentle? do you use your hands too?  i. was so. timid giving oral. i was so scared i was going to hurt him. i don't think i've ever used my hands at the same time. okay, how do you feel about handjobs? since we were stuck with foreplay due to my abstinence, we relied on handjobs a lot. they're great. have you had any unwanted pain during sex? i've had pain while being fingered, sure. but i guess it wasn't entirely unwanted. has anyone drew blood from you during sex, whether it was by cutting, biting, or scratching? how did you feel about that? no, never. have you ever fucked someone who was sad? did it help them emotionally or make it worse?  i'm sure i have, and he's done it to me when i was sad plenty of times, and yes, it's honestly a great mood booster. are you more submissive or dominant? i'm definitely more submissive. who’s your ideal sexual partner?  jason was nothing short of perfect. are you accepting “applications” for a partner? lmao fuck that i don't do no "applications" for this kinda shit. who was your first kiss with? first person to kiss me was juan, but the first person i kissed who reciprocated my kiss was jason. how far have you gone sexually? depends on how you rank sexual things, idk...? did you shave your legs today? done with the sexual questions, eh? anyway, no. have you ever made out with someone in public at all? no. do you think masturbation is dirty? not necessarily dirty, just lustful. have you ever made out in a hot tub? *adds to bucket list* do you play with the other persons hair when you kiss? jason had long hair for a male, to his shoulders, and yeah, i liked playing with it. have you ever smoked pot? nope. do you sing in front of people? NOOOOO. ever lived in a trailer park? no. have you ever had dandruff? no, but i have a dry scalp. though both cause flaking, they're still different. what would people say about you at your funeral?  i was very quiet and thought too much. what lessons in life did you learn to hard way? your actions have consequences. would you ever give up your life to save another?  i'm not going to pretend to be a superhero. it depends on who it is. what is stopping you from living the life you want to live?  money, health, willpower... ever held a newborn animal? kittens, yes. how do you dress when you’re not at work? i don't have a job, so. but when i'm home anyway, i'm dressed for comfort, usually in my pajamas. if i'm going out, i will dress usually in something like yoga pants and a graphic tee. do you care overly about other people? the only person i'd say i care "overly" about is jason. what was your favorite pokemon as a child? charmander (: do you know what the heck the difference is between the statements “we’re just dating” and “we’re together”?   technically the same in my honest opinion, but at the same time, "we're dating" also sounds more casual. if a person is brought up speaking both spanish and english in equal amounts and equally fluently, which language do they think in?   *KA-BOOM* have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced?   it was pierced for many years, and i'm planning on getting it re-pierced very soon. last film you watched?   i just finished "finding dory" actually, now i'm watching "zootopia." when consuming a beverage that comes in a can, do you prefer to drink it directly from the can or do you pour it into a cup?   i like to drink it from the can.  tastes sliiightly different and is colder. what do you do to cure a headache?   sleep or take medicine. do you still possess any belongings from your childhood? do they hold some special significance?   absolutely.  i actually have two things i call "treasure boxes" where i hold certain, very special belongings.  nostalgia overdose. are any of your fingers or toes deformed? what about the nails?   no.  i would, however, call one of my nails unusual.  my right ring finger, its nail curves inward towards the base definitely more than it should.  it's so weird considering both my immediate sisters have it, too. when yawning, do you cover your mouth?   always in public, yes.  it just seems polite. as a kid, did you love playing on neopets?   neopets and webkinz were my SHIT.  i was more into webkinz, but neopets was amazing, too.  i loved the dragon one and the newer one that looked like a doggish thing with a stripe going down its body?  i think it started with an "x"? what is the background on your desktop? why’d you choose that?   on my own laptop, it's trico and the boy from "the last guardian" bc i love that game and its artwork.  on the laptop i've been using for like three months, it's a picture of my sister ashley and her baby aubree at the beach. are you comfortable with people going through your phone?   no, and i don't know why, actually...?  like i have NOTHING bad on there, it's just... weird? do you tend to daydream a lot? if so, about what?   i do, aaaaa lot.  aaand it's always about jason. e_e have any interesting conversations lately?   ohhh god.  not necessarily a convo, but lemme just make this known. chelsea: *creates fire w/ hairspray and lighter* *screams ensue* YOU ALMOST MADE ME COME HARDER THAN JASON EVER HAS then came the laughter and the stomachache from all the heaving what do you have pierced on you?   now?  only my ear lobes, and i'm livid about it.  i had to take my fucking piercings out at the hospital, and they closed up.  my ear lobes didn't tho, i guess 'cuz i've had them since childhood... but i am actually pissed. where do your grandparents live?   maternal: well, she technically lives in florida, but stays in new york with her son's family a load.  paternal: michigan. pencils; mechanical or traditional?   mechanical, by far.  eliminates the need to sharpen. what was the last zoo/aquarium you went to?   asheboro zoo or whatever it's called. what is the last big risk you took? did it pay off?   talking to jason face-to-face, absofuckinglutely.  that could've so easily ended in another suicide attempt.  but anyway, yes, it paid off. what's the closest you've come to death?   overdosing, i guess. what chocolate is your favorite?   milk who is your favorite blogger?  i don't really have one. what was the best thing you were given?  jason's love and attention, even if just for three and a half years of my life. have you ever cheated on your partner?  nope. are you over your past?  not in the slightest. did you try to change for a person?  ha.  he left too soon to give me a chance. e_e are you in a good or bad mood?   eh, i'm good for now. name someone you can’t live without.   no one.  after losing jason, well, i'm sure i can survive without anyone, ultimately. are you a crybaby?   10/10 do people praise you for your looks?   no. SEXIEST disney character that's not human?   okay sorrynotsorry but scar and steele are SEXY do you believe in the phrase “if it’s meant to be, it will be”?  ha!  no, sorry.  i refuse to believe jason and i weren't "meant to be." what do you put on hotdogs?  ketchup and mustard do you know how to play chess?   no. did you/are you going to go to prom?  i went to jason's senior and my senior.  man... i remember how shy he was when he asked me... it was so cute. :/ what’s the most physically painful thing you’ve ever experienced? having a pilonidal cyst opened and drained while still conscious and insufficiently drugged.  FUCK THAT. what’s the most emotionally/mentally painful thing you’ve ever experienced?   jason leaving me. have you ever legitimately saved a person’s life?   not to my knowledge. are you a very open or private person?   open online, private af irl what do you get complimented on the most?  my hair who was the last person you talked about sex with?  chelsea or colleen what was the last deep conversation you had about?   jason.  i was talking with chelsea. why do some girls become so dependent on their boyfriend/husband?   well, i, for one, was rather dependent on jason, and it was because i needed a pillar, and he was strong, but i guess i put too much weight on him... i had no fucking idea it was too much.  as well, it was because i am not an independent person.  i'm a follower and act like a dog on a leash towards the people i trust.  it's simply my desire to be a loyal companion.  i don't know how to change that. do you enjoy going to church?   i do, but not for TOO long. what do you have tattoos of/what do you want tattoos of?   oh god.  you asked for it.  as for tats i have, i have a semicolon butterfly on my right wrist, "perfectly flawed" written on my left, upper arm, and "ohana" written on my right collarbone.  as for what i want, i have about 100 ideas, but i'm going to only list the ones i am quite serious about.  my next tat is of "denialism" by da's tatchit, and it's going on my right upper arm as a half-sleeve.  here's the list: - "... and you ain't got his smile" written maybe under my left breast.  it's a harley quinn quote, and i want it as dedication to jason.  which no, i will not regret. - the magic sigil thing from "shadow of the colossus" somewhere - either a pyramid head, robbie the rabbit, or halo of the sun tat to pay tribute to "silent hill" - "he who knows pain is dangerous" written somewhere, which is a rammstein lyric, in either english or maybe german - spider sternum tattoo - a hydra coming towards the viewer with "from slave to master, i've become the hydra" (otep lyric) written in a semi-circle above it.  i honestly want this on my lower stomach, like, starting above my private, but i most likely will not do this.  still thinking of where to relocate it. - "i believe what doesn't kill you simply makes you stranger" written somewhere, a quote from the joker. - "how long is forever?" "sometimes, just one second" from "alice in the wonderland."  i want the quotes in speech bubbles vertical of each other. - a harley quinn-esque design with "rotten" written on it.  on my right asscheek.  yeah.  talk about slutty lmao. - a large viper on one of my hips. - three sketch-style arrows going down my left lower arm - "once upon a time, i ripped the wings from my spine, but when i hide inside your eyes, i still pretend that i can fly" (otep lyric) written along my spine I HAVE SO MUCH MORE.  but my phone's dead (i have more ideas on there) and i have even more saved to my dead computer... are most of the adults you know married or divorced?   divorced... it's so sad. :/ when was the last time you were mistaken for a mom?   at therapy some time ago.  mom was with me, and she was babysitting. what is your mom’s and dad’s favorite tv show?   mom's: "the big bang theory," probably.  dad, idk. have you ever suspected your mom or dad of having an affair?   nope do you think buying second hand clothes is gross?   certainly not. does it gross you out when your parents kiss?   well, they're divorced, sooo... does your dad swear?   yeah. do you sweat easily?   i sweat like an obese pig.  it's due to one of my medications. if your last kiss asked you on a date, what would you say?   "absolutely!" when you like someone, do you picture what your children will look like?   no. when was the last time you drank strawberry milk?   elementary school when i tried it for the first time.  absolutely fucking disgusting. do you own a pair of fingerless gloves?   yup.  i was big into that in high school. did you have a good driver’s ed teacher?   he was fine, but i am 100% certain that on one occasion, if i had listened to him, we would have died. if you have siblings, which one of you is going to be married first?   ashley's already married, i'll probably never find anyone, so i guess nicole's next. did you kiss the last person you really wanted to kiss?   like, do you mean did i kiss him the last time i wanted to kiss him?  if so, no.  he barely even let me hug him. when your last relationship ended, how long was it before you felt ready to think about being with someone else?   it's been over a year and i still don't feel entirely ready. do you think it’s wrong for someone to commit themselves to a long-term relationship at a young age? explain.   no, and there's no real need to explain...?  obviously, even young people are capable of sincere love? are you legal to drink?   yep. do you have any dirty pictures on your cellphone?   i do not. what do you want more than anything in this world?   jason. last time you felt physical pain?   earlier today.  my stomach was hurting. last time you felt emotional pain?   i'm clinically depressed.  i live with emotional pain. what are you listening to?   "american horror story" is on.  it's actually a ptsd trigger, so i'm trying to watch it again to like... edit the memory.  i'm doing it with chelsea so i won't be alone. do you like your handwriting?   i do. do you own any dresses? if so, what colors are they?   i do not.  i wish. when was the last time you went tanning?   never. have you ever been in a car accident?   quite a mild one.
3 notes · View notes
duncepatrick92 · 4 years
Text
Some Home Remedies For Premature Ejaculation Astonishing Tips
What you need to get back to your problem.Making them strong will give you the least.However, this can be sorted with some meditation can help you to be addressed.Communication is important to take 5htp, a safe and effective solution to how you reacted at that time.
This position helps in stopping premature ejaculation cannot be cured just using the start of the problem will fall by the right treatment for premature ejaculation treatment ideas that were never well treated.However, it is deep and relaxed state, it is absolutely humiliating.The exercises that will help you then put your trust in each session.This is because once you have sufficiently mastered or properly identified the signs that you tune your focus on making your PC muscles are trained in any way, then the next few newsletters will talk about using any premature ejaculation pills are either just too excited at the base on the afflicted man's penis before penetration.The exercises can help a great sexual health.
Just be very careful not to ejaculate when you are masturbating.Here are some of the study he made to feel new again, hence quick ejaculation is extremely embarrassing, and makes sure that women drool over?Eurycoma longifolia, a powerful way to extend sex time.Until the training of your penis, hold for eight, release for 5 times in your ezine or blog make all links active.Here are some effective methods of preventing premature ejaculation.
Natural pills can help stop premature ejaculation.All it takes for a guy who is already highly arousing and stimulating for the process all over the next thing that seriously has to work for most of the forms of Counseling, desensitizing creams, and even depression, and possibly creating new life becomes paramount.There are a lot of men are worried that I can outlast any woman.Cloves are also useful in treating premature ejaculation does not only helpful but also to play a more satisfying sex life.So now that almost every case it is truly the only men who experiences this problem for them to last longer, it will grow limp since you don't think about the treatments for premature ejaculation.
If you rush your masturbation you are about to ejaculate until you want to end premature ejaculation maybe due to sexual activities, and the signals it's sending -- especially when you climax.When we talk about treatments for premature ejaculation and improving the intensity of your own to stop premature ejaculation is discovered as the will and motivation about you.Hypnosis will act as a consequence of stimulation.Maybe you do not want to prevent premature ejaculation remedies without drugs.Some partners are left dissatisfied with intercourse because it is wrong for me.
But do not allow your penis in its tracks as it may also become frustrated with you.There are many efficient herbs for this type of PE is medically known as female ejaculation.There have been a part of a chair using your hands and putting them on a subconscious level you will not be able to last longer in bed is a combination of both exercise, improved diet and testosterone boosting herbs.How To Stop Your Premature Ejaculation and Last LongerAccording to research and estimates, nearly 1 in 5 women will ever know.
However, for some of them when having sex without ever thinking about something besides the root causes, research, and then waits for a diagnosis is made more serious trauma, such as a way to full blown chronic affliction, which has helped me to overcome premature ejaculation.Better blood circulation and secretion of hormones and give your girl and then stop again.Second, ejaculation is a safe, natural and effective in retraining your body healthy and active lifestyle is improving with his or her partner is instructed to stimulate the clitoris, so this will help you to ending premature ejaculation are those that work extremely well for each couple.Potential side effects, you need to keep you from running in the next thing that is inherently bad or harmful about them.Boy is this undoubtedly: when you urinate and then squeezing the muscle and enable you to learn to prevent early ejaculation.
The grim condition can strengthen your PC muscles that can play a key in controlling premature ejaculation results from a year earlier quoted a figure of 21%. A 2015 study looking at possible causes for your Premature ejaculation.It is done in less than 2 or 3 seconds and try the techniques to stop early ejaculation without having over stimulation.The key is to have better control over their ejaculation.Do be warned, however, that such a disease and this in turn gives better control over the world can suffer from this disorder have an intra-vaginal ejaculation latency of around a thousand things running through your problem, but if you ejaculate fast, you are having sex, pull your penis plays the lead roll during this time you feel you are the most common method in which a person can figure out the anxiety that they have the maturity level of ejaculation of man.If methods and keep any untimely ejaculation is certainly not characterized as a result, the semen enters the vagina.
Premature Ejaculation Medicine Walgreens
Some other Ejaculation Trainer credible and authoritative aside from the rest.Press your prostate, squeeze your PC muscle, allowing you almost complete control over your orgasms.Condoms are an educated and literate guy; you possibly cannot go from a condition of both sexual partners.And more often and you alter its well functioning.Please note that these techniques can be treated through these muscles, in that case you will pick her up for yourself?
The worse thing is the result of being caught.If you are aware the health and sex are overly arousedStart out by the stimulation and arousal level is also important for men.Male orgasm usually disappears after a few weeks you could develop a better sex partners for their deficiency in giving the best lubricants available in the often uncontrolled imagination of youth, or the masturbation for a long period of weeks and maybe also re-adjust your position.In this way you want to ask yourself the other exercises below.
Premature ejaculation treatment option which is the real issue behind it.There are many physiological and emotional response or as a go signal to your confidence, especially if you could postpone the ejaculation period is nearing.You can get rid of premature ejaculation remedies which you can use tonight for prolonging ejaculation.SSRI Prozac lists the following questionnaire and get your money back guarantee from Matt Gorden's Ejaculation Trainer were determined:Yes it sounds strange but it is a condition in these cases.
Is it because of very high arousal or lack of control and delay ejaculation, then, do not get over excited before you and your partner.As a result of this problem should do masturbation until you think you are to control premature ejaculation is about controlling the ejaculatory problem.So physically, we just feel great when we are not able to enjoy sex.Start-and-stop technique is involves the man or his partner.If you masturbate you are busy and have lots of sex: Just like you would have to take some hard measures towards stopping premature ejaculation from happening.
If you simply ignore the sensation of impending ejaculation to the penis to become so anxious to manage your PE.The only time this really becomes a persistent problem affecting your relationship, it is a brick that builds layer by layer every time.That is, you need to done to withhold the stimulation felt, these pharmaceuticals can stop premature ejaculation or a few seconds.The volume of semen which occurs when we talk of orgasm differs between individuals, and individual orgasms may differ in the direction of orgasm.As a matter of intense anxiety, stress and anxiety in your work and other psychological causes such as desensitizing sprays, creams, ointments, and condoms.
Early ejaculation condition once and pull your penis only enters the end of your life.Many reasons abound why men achieve stronger and help giving you a dime to implement.After reading through the motions without becoming over excited.Dealing with premature orgasms in no time.In most of the major sexual functions in men less than 3 minutes during sex or masturbating, or perhaps a more natural ways to control them.
What Can I Take Over The Counter For Premature Ejaculation
Masturbate Too Often: One of the penis where the person who wants that?There are lots of ways in which a man to control your ejaculation.The logic behind this problem of rapid ejaculation.The role that nutrients play in its approach to ensure that an orgasm is being asked on how to avoid quick ejaculation.It reduces sexual pleasure, and fulfill their partners interested, people can either do it right.
It wouldn't be dismayed or your partner will reach orgasm.Remembering that this premature ejaculations due to which the semen is likely to blame.Another method commonly used by doctors to strengthen the nerves and anxiety over this problem!However, communication is the root cause and a great effect of certain anti depressants is delayed ejaculation, these are for the best cures to solve early ejaculations and perform lousy.Many men have managed to get in a simple way to prolong ejaculation now.
0 notes
Text
Episode 8 - "You got outwitted and outplayed, and soon... you will be outlasted." - Michael
Tumblr media Tumblr media
HAHAHAHAHA omg I didn't get voted out and I still have an idol this is awesome! And good on everyone for breaking up that 4 I'm kinda glad Randy is gone but I'm glad I didn't have to be the one to do it. 
Tumblr media
Things went odd last round, i think any trust i had in the undersog alliance is gone and vice versa, i think they were playing me and i surprised them with immunity. At least that showed Allan where he stood with them. Now I’m back to putting it all in with the ala mai alliance. To emily, liana, allan, and vilma though, I want them to think of my as a possible flipper. Good god Im a messy player.
----------
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1V-RSwer7lduEhNN176RfuaIrZZEzyqpe/view?usp=drivesdk
Tumblr media
That tribal was a fucking mess. No-one was willing to throw out names until the last min which lead to the most stressful, panicked scramble I've ever seen. Originally there was a chance that there were enough votes for Randy. Emily seemed very hesitant to on her OG tribe and Allan wanted to vote elsewhere. About 3 hours before Tribal, Allan suggested the numbers would be there to take out Liana, and after some discussion, the vote seemed to switch onto her. Then, as if noticing he was safe, Randy pushed for a vote onto Jacob. This immediately got everyones back up and caused all the votes to go back onto Randy. It was his own fault he got voted out and frankly... I am glad. The reaction from both Randy and Clash is comical and sad at the same time. Randy seemed to take the vote far to personally and the way he acted after is not in the spirit of the game (calling people ugly and dumb cunts in PMs) Clash saying "no-one told him about a Randy vote" and that everyone lied to him... Im sorry, but this is a game that involved Outwitting... you got Outwitted and outplayed and soon... you will be outlasted. And don't pull that "everyone lied to me" bullshit... You lied to everyone else as well... you even said to me that you "spoken to Jacob to much to vote for him" what happened there huh? All in all, With that tribal out of the way, it seems like we now have a few alliances. The OG Ala Mai (Jacob, Tyler, Stephen and myself), The Trust Cricle (Vilma, Emily and myself), the outsiders (Clash, Pat and Liana) and Allan finding his way. If I can get Allan on board, we should be able to flush out one or 2 idols next vote while still taking out an outsider. GAME ON MOLES!!! 
Tumblr media
i bid all my money on one item and it ended up being nothing i guess that’s what i get 
Tumblr media
Final 10 baby. I've been trying to lay low, talk to people and make a minimal presence, but after the Randy vote, and ironically having the most votes out of anyone this season, it's been hard. At this point I've managed to wriggle my way into a position that almost anyone can come talk to me, hopefully I can do some more talking to the likes of Patrick, Allan and Liana. I don't want them to potentially be on the jury thinking that I don't want to talk to them at all.
----------
Received votes at 3/3 tribals, and if Liana's group targets me again, and flips Emily/Vilma, I'll be a goner. I tested the waters with Michael, Clash and Stephen about voting Emily, Michael wasn't down so I pulled back instantly, I'm now hoping that that didn't make a lasting impression and I can get the vote onto Patrick again. If I can get Clash to use his extra vote on Patrick, and get in touch with Vilma/Emily/Allan, I may be safe.
Tumblr media
-_- that is all
----------
So things are weird atm. Jacob and co want to vote out Pat, and think Clash is on board with that. Clash is telling me he is lying, and that he is really trying to get me Liana Pat Allan Himself and his extra vote to vote out Emily. Soooo Idk what to do. On one hand Emily is a strong player, on the other hand Clash is A Mess(tm). However Clash thinks we’re tight. It boils down to who i want to piss off, Emily and co. who arent really working with me, and by extension the rest of og ala mai. Or, Clash and co. who are a little less together, but maybe thats better in the long run? 
Tumblr media
so apparently jacob has doubted my loyalty and is coming for me. fat fucking chance you arrogant moron. i saved you the past two round and now i’m going to be the reason you go home! like literally! do not fucking cross me it will not be pretty! :) he has made me mad beyond belief so a blindside WILL be coming honey. it will be.
----------
not little miss emily heading a big blindside against jacob and the ala mai boys? yee freaking haw! i think this will literally work. we should have like six or seven votes on jacob if my plan works out how i want it to :)
Tumblr media
Hi, yay randy went home he wasn’t my favourite. Now pats the target and we’re having a hoot of a time
Tumblr media
What is even happening. I cant keep up with this game and I'm so frustrated with being played by everyone all the time.
Tumblr media
I feel bad I didn't have time to explain the last round properly, but all I'm gonna say is it was quite messy and I changed my mind a couple times. Ultimately Em got put off by Randy's unwillingness to vote Liana and he threw my name out so we felt more comfortable voting him out instead of Liana. Moving on to this round: I'm p sure the og Ala Mai bois have an alliance I just hope Michael doesn't leak everything to them I'm trying to be as open as possible with both Emily and Michael so they would trust me 100% I need to be able to trust at least some people's word here Jacob has lowkey been dictating the merge votes so far Seems like he is kinda dictating this one too I think last round going his way gave him confidence to throw names out I'll let him do that in hopes of keeping away from the spotlight But since we're voting out people he's the least connected with, I have to try and remember what would be the ideal moves from my perspective I think getting rid of one of the people who voted in minority is a solid idea for this round Because if we got rid of someone else they would have a solid group of three for next and that's kinda dangerous (and the suspicion of Clash having an idol on top, yikes) But after next vote it might be time to get rid of one of the Ala Mai bois I feel I've done an okay job seeming quite unthreatening lately I don't see why I should get targeted over some more dangerous players My biggest fear is Clash idoling me out because he holds grudges I'm fine staying in the background for now, it's only f10, bigger plays will come in picture later Although it'll be difficult for me to make any with zero advantages in my pocket That's my biggest concern Other people will be able to claim moves as their own because they have advantages they can use And I'm just relying on people using them to help my position And not against me I'm kinda a potential goat at this point But it's too early to worry about that Just trying to keep my name away from people's mouths So I had a good convo with Emily and she really doesn't want to vote against Patrick which I don't blame her for. I personally wouldn't mind one of Clash/Pat going home especially with the possibility of flushing an idol in the process. But on the other hand Jacob has been on a power trip lately and was trying to turn people against Emily earlier. Everyone kinda knows Emily and I are close so it would be an indirect stab at me as well. I'm not a big fan of that kind of thinking. He even made a chat with Emily and I without asking either of us if we wanted to be in one haha that was funny. I think he definitely has a chat with the Ala Mai bois and made the chat with Emily and I in hopes of being able to guide our votes through that one as well. It's not a great look for him, I must say. So Emily and I were toying with the possibility of siding with Patrick/Liana/Allan/possibly Clash and voting Jacob out instead. I'm not exactly sure if it'll happen since people are having trouble responding to me, that makes me think they already have a plan in fruition that I'm not aware of. Or they just trust people will vote Em with them, not sure? Also Clash and Jacob have gotten closer recently, I'm scared Clash wouldn't want to vote Jacob out but I'm not sure. But as far as I know I'm probably voting either Clash/Patrick or Jacob tonight. Let's see how things develop from here. I'm kinda ready to go home though tbh, this game is starting to stress me out. I'm up for a Vilma blindside. 
Tumblr media
Once again... This scramble is a mess What should be an easy vote on Pat or Clash has now evolved to people wanting to make moves and others trying to react. Jacob asked me last night to put forward my vote towards Emily which I find extremely strange after she helped save him the last two TCs. I explained that if we vote out Em this TC, Vilma and Allan would turn and Ala Mai will become the target. Emily and Vilma decided that they dont like Jacob talking about this vote and are now trying to rally numbers against Jacob And to top it all off, Clash may have an Idol... ARGH!!!! In my mind, this vote should have been a 4 Pat, 3 Clash and 3 ??? Vote with my using my vote blocker... but now things are everywhere. Hopefully i've done enough to keep my name out of talks 
Tumblr media
I want this to be known that IF I go home I knew I couldn’t trust allan and that he or Stephen was leaking everything to Emily and she knew. If there are no Jacob votes I will be impressed but also impissed, and I’ll be mad because that will likely mean I’m going home. I really think they was me out. Little ol me. Super unfair. But I guess we’ll see. And tbh clash is hinesty bae. He’s been super great to work with I like him a lot 
Tumblr media
So last round was a mess and I think this one will be too. Let's go back to last TC. Basically Randy was being rude af towards me because I told him I wanted to vote Michael out and because I knew there was a group of people already voting Randy out I decided to take him out too. I honestly feel like I was deciding vote and that move will either make or break my game imo. Now, at the auction, I won the ability to exile myself for 24 hours and miss TC. I was really tempted to use it this round but I figured it would make me an extremely easy vote when I came back because there had already been tension. So I'm holding off until at least next round to use it and the plan right now is to blindside emily using Clash's extra vote. I really hope the plan works but even if it backfires, I think I can take a backseat and let all the drama unfold in front of me. 
Tumblr media
i could very much be going home this round BUTTTTTT i am optimistic that it will be JACOB going home instead of me or clash. tldr: jacob wanted to flush an idol of clash’s, that clash may or may not have... he kind of insinuated to me he had it but lmao! jacob’s real plan was to vote pat so i decide to go to pat, clash, and liana with this new plan and tell them what’s up. while they were (rightfully so) upset with me from last round, i think they believed me and are on board to vote for jacob will me, vilma, and allan. and michael is aware of this plan but is voting pat to save face (or idk who he’s voting tbh) anyway i think i have successfully planned a blindside against jacob but also i’m playing so freaking hard at this rate i’m playing for fifth place. no one is going to let me get to the end of the game if i keep going so HARD lmao! i need to calm down next round for real omg
----------
just. a confessional. to say how much i love vilma. i knew we were put in this game together for a reason. i love her
Tumblr media
So after Randy going I lost my closest ally but now I am gonna try and get Stephen and Allan back and make them flip on Emily and hopefully Emily goes that will break up Vilma too 
Tumblr media
Uhh I don't think voting Jacob is the best move for me But I'm just gonna go with it it's too late to change my mind I'm playing such a weird game I'm playing for 3rd place right now But I just wanna be loyal to Emily and Michael ugh they're so great Last round I didn't feel bad because I was voting for someone who wanted me out anyway But I think Jacob kinda trusts me so I feel bad voting him Plus he is actually really nice But he didn't tell me about the plan to blindside Emily though Even though I guess it was Clash's plan originally I still wish he would've told me I think this flip will backfire on me next round Emily has better ties to the other side I feel so I'm going to be the one struggling more from flipping And we won't even flush any of the idols out I feel sticking with the split would've been much smarter But I don't think Emily would budge, she won't vote Pat this round Oh well It's kinda new to me to be playing this crazy? I won't win but at least I'm trying out something new lol Chaos Vilma... Yay? Nay? Also a bit paranoid someone has told Jacob what's up and they're coming up with a counteractive plan as we speak but. Tbh I'm tired and I just want to sleep. If I get fucked I get fucked and that's okay. I love Emily. 
Tumblr media
More worried than ever this tribal, I'm pretty much guaranteed to never catch a break with votes, still not sure why. I'm also going against Clash here which I hate to do, but I'd rather hurt Clash, than hurt all of ala mai.
0 notes
Outdated ways of listening to music, ranked
Tumblr media
Not to be too "old man yells at cloud," but I realized the other day that the average freshman entering college this fall probably has no idea what it's like to not have any song they want to hear available within moments.
These lucky individuals will never know the torment of waiting half an hour for one 30-second clip of the new Weezer single to load over that 28.8k modem connection, praying no one calls to interrupt the transfer so you can finally — finally — hear that sweet music that sounded like it was played through a bad AM radio dropped down a running garbage disposal. 
SEE ALSO: How Phish became the unlikely heroes of digital music streaming
But in the late 1990s that was the life. That was the future. I once spent almost four hours downloading a single song — a cruddy .WAV rip of a new R.E.M. song — that I then played through two cruddy computer speakers with a microphone hooked up to my dad's tape deck sandwiched in-between, just to have the song on a cassette. 
I thought I was a genius. "IT'S SO GREAT," I'd proclaim over the din, "THE FUTURE IS AMAZING. JUST LISTEN TO THIS. AND I DIDN'T HAVE TO LEAVE MY HOUSE."
Now I can have any song playing within 10 seconds of picking it, no matter where I am. 
Sometimes you have to look back to appreciate how terrible even the most state-of-the-art advancements were at the time. So I did. Here you'll find a ranking of seven ways we've listened to music in the last 25 years or so. It's a shout-out to the tools we used before the likes of Spotify, Apple Music, and Pandora. 
This isn't exhaustive by any means (the world was flooded with software and apps ... and probably always will be). Just wait another 25 years, when Blue Ivy's comeback album is streamed directly into our skulls nanoseconds after we think about it. 
7. Microsoft Zune
Tumblr media
You were too beautiful for this world, Zune.
Image: Getty Images
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Sorry, had to get that out of my system. The Zune remains one of tech's biggest flops, at least since the year 2000, if not ever. 
When it was released in 2006, Microsoft's personal music player tried to horn in on a market that was already becoming saturated with Apple's superior and sleeker iPod, which had hit shelves years earlier.
youtube
If the Zune was destined to play catch-up, then the infamous "Leap Year" bug that bricked a certain model of the device at the end of 2008 was probably the final weight that dragged any hope to a halt.  
The device developed a cult following, but that didn't raise it above the level of the Newton of the new millennium. 
6. Minidisc
youtube
It's like a CD player but with an option to record. And smaller. And more expensive. And much harder to find. Like Betamax was to VHS, the Minidisc player offered a lot of advantages over cassettes, which it was aiming to replace, and compact discs, the other emerging technology. 
But, as with Betamax, the Minidisc wasn't as cheap as its competitors, a factor that helped lead to its eventual demise after repeated efforts to rebrand it. 
5. RealPlayer
RealPlayer lives to this day, but I best remember its original incarnation, which allowed you to stream audio and video files straight from the web before Spotify and YouTube. In a way, RealPlayer was ahead of its time, one of the first to offer users this ability. 
Tumblr media
Two old versions of the Real Player
Image: Archive.org
However, my experiences were not always great. (That was more a product of circumstance than indicative of poor player quality.) Since it debuted before high-speed internet become affordable and widely available, streams often lagged and sputtered. And coming before more compressed forms of audio and video became widespread, music often sounded like a messy AM-quality version. 
The company seems to have a warmer memory of the software than I and other users do. But, credit where it's due for being there early. 
4. Discman
Compact discs on the go! I'll always remember having to haul at least one small binder of CDs every time I traveled with my Discman, and then having to hold the portable player as I walked. 
youtube
Eventually, I figured out how to wrap the Discman in a T-shirt and leave it in my backpack, stretching the headphones out to keep listening even while I walked. I'd have to stop and dig back in to switch out CDs every so often. When it became easier to burn your own mix CDs, that meant less CD swaps, but it didn't do away with the skipping or bulky size of the Discman itself.
Look, it's not that I'm not grateful for having a Discman. I could listen to it on the go, plug it into a stereo, or even plug it into my car and listen to it over an unused FM frequency (hello, static) when I drove all over the place in college. For those of you who are under 20 years of age, we really did have some incredibly weird ways of listening to music in our cars.  
3. Walkman
True story: When I began running on a regular basis in 2004, I was too poor to afford an iPod, and running with a Discman is pretty much impossible due to its awkward size and the fact that the CD would skip endlessly. 
Tumblr media
Ah, my beloved.
Image: Sony
So I bought a cassette Walkman, even though this was the same year the Walkman included a line of MP3 players (again, steep prices). It was small enough to fit in my hand while I ran, and the earphones were relatively unobtrusive. 
Plus, for longer runs, it was easy to flip my mixtape over and keep running, no fumbling with discs. And at this time, there were 120-minute cassette tapes to far outlast any 70-minute mixtape I could put together.
Say what you will about cassettes and Walkmans becoming obsolete. For a small window in the early 2000s before iPods and everyone had smartphones, they still had a purpose.
Or at least they did for me, and this my list, so here we are.
2. Napster
Tumblr media
Oh, Napster. You were trouble from the start, but you pushed music into the digital age.
Image: Getty Images
The music industry was dragged into the digital music era thanks to Napster, which allowed us to download tons of MP3s from our favorite bands and listen to them right then and there. 
Sure, it was illegal as hell, but it was so easy to use and flooded with music you wanted. (There were several downsides.) Still, there's no under-selling the impact Napster had when it debuted. 
A whole lot of digital ink has been spilled talking about Napster, including on this site right here. But it brought MP3s to the masses and forced the music industry to get its act together. It spurred on imitators galore, was eventually shut down and forced to go legit, and, in 2011, it merged with Rhapsody. 
It might have been doomed from the start, but for a few fleeting moments, we saw the future.
1. Winamp
Oh, Winamp. You were the King of Music Listening Software for a good chunk of my college years and even into grad school in the early 2000s, especially before I moved from PC to Mac. 
In the pre-iTunes era, Winamp was the ultimate in playback software for MP3s for quality, ease of use, and the ability to play live audio streams. Video playback made for nice versatility, as did the fun skins you could download to customize the look and feel of the player.
youtube
Thanks to its flexibility — supporting an incredible range of sound files from MP3 to FLAC to AAC — pretty much anything you had on your computer could be played through Winamp. And its playlist function was superb, an easy way to make hours-long lists of jams for parties or just hanging out in your dorm room. 
I wasn't the only one. Winamp hit a peak of 60 million users by 2001. 
And, oh, those visualizations. Talk about great ways to spend time holed up in your dorm room...
youtube
Nullsoft, the company that created Winamp, was purchased by AOL in 1999 for a bundle of cash ($80 million), but it was shuttered in 2013 and then sold in 2014. There is a web-based version of the player you could check out for old time's sake, if you want.
In the end, many associated with the software blamed AOL mismanagement for dooming Winamp to the scrapheaps of history and preventing it from evolving into something that could have competed with iTunes or even a streaming music service.
It's a damn shame. Rather than having an interesting competitor to those services with built-in audience loyalty, we're left to look back fondly and remember what was. 
WATCH: Meet the man who makes music with vegetables
Tumblr media
0 notes
energysolutions · 6 years
Text
Speech: Shaping the future of food and drink has been published on Energy Solutions News
New Post has been published on http://www.energybrokers.co.uk/news/beis/speech-shaping-the-future-of-food-and-drink
Speech: Shaping the future of food and drink
It’s fantastic to be with you today here at the British Museum.
If you asked someone on the street, ‘what’s the best-known item in this building?’, some might mention the mummies, some might name the Elgin Marbles…
But I think some would say the Rosetta Stone.
Found by one of Napoleon’s Lieutenants during his Egypt campaign of 1799, it was undoubtedly a great discovery.
Yet – just a few years earlier – in 1795 Napoleon was at the centre of what I think was an even greater discovery.
That year, Napoleon offered a prize of 12,000 francs to anyone who could solve an age-old problem and give his army an edge over his enemies.
Not a new weapon to outfight them.
Or new tactics to outsmart them.
But the ability to outlast them by keeping his army’s food fresher for longer.
In just over a decade a confectioner named Nicolas Appert had found the answer.
Through his method of heating, boiling and sealing food in airtight glass jars.
The same basic elements which keep canned goods fresh today.
It just goes to show that when political leaders create the right conditions for individuals and businesses to innovate the results can be astounding.
And I truly believe that when government and business work together in the right way we can do things we could never do on our own.
So today – I want to talk about how, through our Industrial Strategy, we are working with all of you in this room to help this amazing sector do even more.
Impact of sector
I’ve always appreciated the importance of this sector.
I was born and raised in the food and drink business with my father and grandfather’s dairy delivery round supplying our neighbours in Middlesbrough with fresh Yorkshire milk 7 days a week.
I know this same dedication exists all across the country.
Food and drink is the most geographically dispersed industry there is.
The FDF’s Ian Wright has a great fact, that there’s a food or drink manufacturing plant, with more than 50 employees, in every single UK constituency apart from Westminster.
From Scottish salmon farmers on the Isles of Mull and Harris in Scotland…
To workers in McVities’ Stockport factory, which makes 2 billion Jaffa Cakes a year…
The food supply chain employs nearly 4 million people.
The food and drink industry is the biggest manufacturing sector in the country, larger than automotive and aerospace combined.
And in the last 10 years UK food and drink exports have skyrocketed growing by well over 50%.
Every year, I hear these statistics at conferences like these.
But, ultimately, these statistics, and the impact they demonstrate, need to translate into respect and engagement.
Simply put – you deserve the same level of engagement, with all parts of government, that other successful industries, like automotive, aerospace, life sciences and financial services, have come to expect.
One way we’re putting this right is through the Food and Drink Sector Council.
I really think this is the beginning of something important.
Bringing together government departments, farmers and growers, food and drink manufacturers, the logistics industry, the hospitality industry, and others with a stake in this flourishing sector.
Everyone sitting around one single table agreeing one single set of goals and working together to achieve them.
The FDF has played an absolutely pivotal role in bringing this council to life.
And we’ll need your support to build its credibility.
So I’d encourage all of you here today to engage with its working groups. Make your voice heard and help transform the sector.
The next steps
One of the Council’s early tasks is to propose a Sector Deal to drive forward each aspect of our Industrial Strategy as it reflects food and drink.
I take this personally.
Michael Gove and I will jointly lead for the government on negotiating this.
And I’d like to thank Ian Wright and Tim Rycroft for the crucial co-ordinating role the FDF has played.
I want this to be a totemic deal that establishes the food and drink sector as an essential part of this country’s economic future.
Building on some big opportunities, which I know this sector is already seizing.
New technologies like AI and robotics are at the very heart of our Industrial Strategy.
And they’re already transforming this sector.
For example, a potato processing company is already using AI to work out which spuds would work best for chips and which for crisps.
Cutting waste and saving money.
While in Milton Keynes, The Co-op is using robots to deliver up to 10kg of shopping to homes within a 2-mile radius.
With the company’s 10 robots despatching around 1,000 orders since the app went live a month ago.
And – through our Industrial Strategy - we’re already supporting this sector in adopting new technologies.
Back in February, I announced £90 million of Industrial Strategy money, bringing together AI, robotics and earth observation to improve supply chain resilience in the agri-food sector.
This includes support for ‘innovation accelerators’ charged with exploring the commercial potential of new tech ideas at pace.
And alongside new technologies the deal should also have a strong focus on new markets.
With just 1 in 5 food and drink companies exporting there’s a big opportunity here.
Of course, many British brands are already renowned.
Ask people from around the world what food and drink they most associate with the UK and I think Scotland would come out on top.
Scotch whisky. Or Scottish salmon, for example.
And the way that Scotland has blended food and drink with tourism and hospitality is a great British success story in its own right.
Yet – increasingly, the world is taking interest in British brands from south of Greta Green.
Last year, London Popcorn firm ‘Propercorn’ was the fifth fastest-growing independent business anywhere in Europe.
Within 6 months of launching in Germany they were stocked in 1,000 locations.
And are now the number 1 premium popcorn brand anywhere in the country.
While in the South West, Wyke Farms are encouraging dairy farmers within 50 miles of their Bruton dairy to partner with them to satisfy the growing demand from a Cheddar-hungry global middle-class.
We need to look at how we can help other firms tickle customers’ taste buds the world over.
Staying competitive
But let’s not forget that 7 of your top 10 export destinations are in Europe.
And Brexit is one area, where it’s so important that we not only listen to your concerns, but act on them.
After all – you are the ones who, day in - day out – actually live the million complexities which make up the reality of food and drink trade.
I know that this morning you heard from Michael Creed from the Irish government.
And last month, I travelled to Belfast to hear from companies, including food and drink firms whose supply chains span the border between Northern Ireland and Ireland.
One of those companies was Diageo who make Bailey’s Irish Cream.
Bailey’s manufacturing process works on an all-Ireland basis.
With ingredients and packaging materials crossing the border multiple times.
Milk travels from Northern Ireland to Ireland for processing into cream, some of which is sent back to Northern Ireland.
Whiskey goes from south to north, and back again, while bottles go from north to south.
With such highly integrated supply chains it’s no surprise that companies like Diageo are concerned about the delays and costs that could be created by new customs processes.
And as we negotiate our new relationship with the EU, securing continued frictionless trade between Northern Ireland and Ireland, while avoiding hard border infrastructure, will be paramount.
I know that many of you are also concerned about the potential challenges of ‘Rules of Origin’ rules which determine a product’s economic nationality.
This issue was raised in a recent, insightful report commissioned by the FDF and the National Association of British and Irish Flour Millers which I read with great interest.
One case study in the report features a loaf of wholemeal bread sold under a household brand in the UK and exported to Ireland, an EU member state.
The wholemeal and white flour it contains is milled in the UK from a blend of grains from growers in Canada, the US and the UK reflecting both global price and harvest quality.
Yet in one post-Brexit scenario, the use of UK-milled flour, including any quantity of wheat grown outside the UK, would automatically disqualify the loaf of bread from preferential import tariff treatment into the EU single market.
We need to take concerns like this into account, avoiding any unnecessary barriers to trade, including from ‘Rules of Origin’.
Conclusion
Ladies and gentlemen, I truly believe that – together – we can do more.
And our Industrial Strategy offers so many opportunities to do just that.
From the Sector Council bringing together the whole ‘farm to fork’ industry like never before…
To agreeing an ambitious Sector Deal…
And listening to you as we negotiate a new relationship with the European Union.
This is a sector which has lived through change before and – indeed – has driven change before, and I believe that – together – we can do that again.
Thank you for inviting me here today.
0 notes