#I will 100% raise this clown as best as I can. But I also have others that need work on as well

[sunmaylight]

It happened again. I haven’t even started the Traum chapter yet.

Me, Single Summon in the Traum Banner for Don Quixote (4*) at work. Chanting in my head: *Don Quixote, Don Quixote, Don Quixote-*

My Mind over the chanting: *Ruler*

Me in my head: *Do- What? No! DON QUIXOTE, DON QUIXOTE, DON QUIXOTE*

FGO: -Gold Card appears-

Me in my head: DON QUI-

FGO: -Flips to Ruler-

Me in my head: *wat*

FGO:

Me in my head: *It is the Astolfo summon all over again*

———

Fun fact, I did not even know that this clown is Ruler Moriarty. When the fanart of him came out in JP, I had 100% no idea who that was and thought he looked silly. Now that I know who this is because of NA. I guess I should try summoning Grandpa Moriarty now just to torment Sherlock.

[thekinkyleopard]

The Gathering

A group Non-Canon Fic (LONG!)

Ft: Alistar, Remi, Biziil, Rexar, Kriia and Meeko

⚠️Content Warning⚠️

Contagion, Uh…germ rolling?, Teasing, Fluff

Description: The Anti-Christ has been up to his usual antics, but now he’s craving something new. He wants excitement. He goes looking for it, and it coincidentally enough, seems to work out…or does it?

Snz Color Key:

Alistar

Remi

Rexar

Kriia

Biz

Meeko

Author’s Notes: Hey Guys! A little bird has told me they want some Al sneeze and I’ve decided to make it happen! Also bare with me on the cover art, Geez is busy and I’m impatient so I just snipped the teaser for now 😅 I don’t wanna talk about it 🥲 😂 anyway! Enjoy!

Alistar has gotten bored of soul collecting, and life ruining. He needs something new. He’s been on earth for a few years now, and he’s expanded his horizons a few ways, by making friends. Kind of. If you could call half of them that. Who’s he kidding, they all secretly love him. However, he was feeling, melancholy, bored, missing something. He had watched so many of his mates come down with colds and messy sneezing afflictions. He wanted that. What did it feel like? To be out of control of your bodily functions? He only felt like he had met that feeling in sex, when he reaches orgasm and that electric shock tingles through every cell in your body. He had to imagine it was something like that, but for some reason it brought those afflicted, suffering. It seemed less than suffering to him.

Step one; Find someone sick. Which wasn’t hard to do in a friend group where many are cursed with poor health and immunities. Al sent everyone a text.

“Hey Hru” and though some went unanswered, he did get one back from the little mutt.

“Bringing some cold medicine by Lee’s, Remi is sick again, why?” the demon snickered. No wonder he didn’t hear from either the cat or wolf. Typical, the man was a walking virus. He knew that would be his best bet. However, getting into their space while Remi is unwell…might be a tad more difficult to achieve than he originally planned. It’s fine. The wolf wouldn’t be able to strangle him into a one way ticket to hell, being less than 100% condition. He’ll risk it. Without texting Draeko back, the mutt feeling a bit annoyed that the demon bothered him for no reason. Al got his keys and made his way to the Conderson House.

Parking in the driveway, he had stopped at the store with all kinds of different goodies he could use to charm the two, less than friendly, acquaintances of his. He got out of his car with the bag of care items in one clutched fist, he approached the front door, knocking for once. Maybe it would make them feel a bit less apprehensive sending him away. Shortly, the door opened and there standing was the freckled face cat.

“Alistar?” He asked confused, raising an eyebrow as he looked the demon up and down, taking note of the bag in his hands. “What are you doing here?” It was never usually good when the red head showed up, so Levi was more or less on guard.

“Heard the wolf is sick, thought I’d bring some stuff and help out,” shrugging his shoulders. Levi narrowed his eyes. This was unlike the other. He didn’t care. He didn’t help. He didn’t nurse. What was his angle?

“What do you want?” The cat asked now with great apprehension.

“What??? Why do I have to want something to help out my dear sick friend, Remi? You offend me so,” smiling to sell the image he was clearly trying to provide. Levi wasn’t buying it even more than he had been previously.

“Al, please, he is not in the mood to deal with any of your clown behavior, you can leave the stuff and go back home,” the leopard went to reach for the bag of items the demon brought, however, it only left access for the redhead to slip inside.

“I won’t be long, don’t worry,” snickering in an almost unnoticeably menacing way. Truthfully, Levi was just too busy closing the door and trying to brace himself for the irritation that was soon to be fogging up the entire house. Al stepped into the bedroom where Remi was splayed across the bed in only a pair of boxers. Sniffling and loosely wiping his arm across his reddened and chapped nostrils. “Nnnn…” the wolf groaned as he rubbed his nose in hard circles soft clicks echoing off his face.

“Hey buddy, you look like shit!” The demon chuckled as he dumped the contents of the bag onto the floor at the wolf’s bedside. Speaking of, his pale green eyes shot open and immediately looked to the intruder.

“What the actual fuck are you doing here?” He growled low in his sore throat trying to avoid coughing through the angry response. Alistar stood back, giving a performance of offense as he touched his chest with his open palm.

“Is that ANY WAY to treat your friend?? I brought you supplies! Snacks! Drugs! Well…the boring one… I brought you edibles!” He now gestured to all the things he had just previously dumped onto the floor.

“Great, now leave,” followed with a rough, hoarse cough that ripped through the man’s already pained throat. It felt like daggers going in and out his esophagus every time. He groaned lowly, his face twisting, nose clenching and scrunching as he was trying to stifle in the prickling tickles that threatened to over power the conversation with each flex of his jaw.

Al stood a bit closer immediately trying to waft the sprayed contagion that entered the air as the larger black haired man had expelled his coughs into open air.

“Stop that, freak,” Remi glared harder at the strange demon as he wiped his mouth. Alistar more or less ignored the statement as he collected the balled up tissues sprawled about the space within the bedroom. “What the fuck are you -hd’ISCHhh, hh'IETSH’UE!…!?” The wolf tried defensively sitting up, but exploded into a loud powerful series of sneezes that caused his whole body to tremble, his hands trembling, bringing them to his face in a panic. Trying to cover himself, hating that the demon was here to see him like this.

“I’m just cleaning! Uncle fuckin’ Christ, man, worry about that illness of yours,” the red head shook his head slowly, almost with joking solemness followed by a humored chuckle. Remi sighed deeply throwing his head back against the headboard to fight between his deteriorating health and the obnoxiously strange demon collecting his trash.

“Leeeeeave!” He groaned snatching up Levi’s pillow and hucking it over violently at the quick moving demon. Who eventually threw his hands up in defense.

“Can you do that again though? One more time?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively before another pillow was thrown directly into his face with a PFFD! It then fell to the floor with an almost silent thud. “Okay! Okay! I’m leaving! Shit!” Mumbling as he snatched up his now refilled bag of used goods and shuffled with haste out through the bedroom door. Levi stood in the living room, looking at Alistar with an apprehensive gaze. “Someone is a sore anal cavity today,” the red head chuckled as he shot a wink toward the cat. Whom in turn rolled his bright ceruleans.

“You want me to take that bag of yuck?” Already starting to reach forward in Al’s direction, but was quickly met with retaliation, the demon recoiled from Levi’s grasp.

“No! Uh…I got it…s’fine!” Chuckling nervously, he scratched the back of his neck before awkwardly shuffling his way now to the front door. “Thanks for letting me stop by!” Waving frantically before he disappeared altogether and began racing his way to his car.

Levi, inside, walked toward the bedroom and looked out the large window that overlooked their property. Remi sat up now as well. “Why did he take all that trash…?” The wolf asked with confusion as he sniffled loudly, rubbing his nose with a new piece of the throw away cloth.

“No idea…” the leopard muttered back but continued to watch through the window, while Al scrambled into his car, and proceeded to dump the bag’s contents over his head. Grabbing handfuls of the used trash and rubbing it across his face. Levi looked over at Remi, who too was watching and they equally shared a silent, but confused gaze.

Alistar on the other hand was now stuffing tissues in his nose, huffing them through his open mouth, and just overall being a gross menace. Once he felt that he was satisfyingly submerged in germs and ick, he started up his car and headed home, leaving the two stunned silent and with millions of unanswered questions.

The Next Day

Alistar woke up with a pounding headache, his body hot, sticky, like he’d been sitting in a sauna. He sat up and pressed his palm to his forehead. “Dear Grandpa God….what the actual fuck…” groaning lowly in his newly sore throat. This was an experience he had never felt in his entire existence. His entire body was stiff, almost entirely impossible to move. Managing to muster any strength within his aching bones, Al came to a stand and slowly stumbled his way into the bathroom, flicking the light on and met face to face with a gruesome reflection. “Oh, Unholy shit… I look worse than I feel,” he mustered up a sore chuckle before it followed with a hacking cough. “Ack!” He cleared his throat, trying to fight over the uncontrollable urges building within his now awakened body.

Though most would find this current state of being completely de habilitating and check out for the next few days, Al was fueled by the aching that throbbed behind the cells of his vessel. Suddenly, an entirely new, foreign feeling started to prickle at the inside of his nostrils, trailing down his throat. He swallowed once, and twitched his pierced nose back and forth. Nothing would soothe and he found himself squinting under the harshness of the bathroom lighting. “H’h…” he stuttered, his breath catching in his throat as he begged to swallow it. “W-Wha-HEhH’eEZSCHhh’iiEW!!”

It came exploding out of the anti-Christ at lightening speed, he hadn’t time to cover as a mess of saliva came splashing across the bathroom mirror. He sniffled loudly and hung over the sink weakly, each hand on both sides of the counter to hold him up. “Fuck…” he gasped with a raspy voice, his eyes leaking and nose starting to drip. “Oh shit…” he stumbled around and grabbed a towelette hanging from the little golden ring on the wall. He slid his nose over it and tried to relieve himself of some of the wetness that polluted him as he grinned with bright satisfaction. “So that’s what that’s like…” he bit his lower lip…interesting. There has to be someone he could play with in this condition.

It took most of whatever strength he had left in him to move himself out the bathroom and through the halls. He searched Drae’s room, nothing. Kanai’s room? Also nothing. Living room, kitchen… “Seriously? None of my toys are home?” He clicked his tongue with irritation as he scanned the small home. “Fine, I’ll just find some,” he grabbed his keys and he was on his way to find some trouble with his new found virus. Who knows what could happen.

.

.

.

On the other side of town, Alistar found himself quite at a loss. It seemed no one wanted to come near him as he sniveled and sniffed. It seemed that majority of citizens look at him as if he said something offensive, and walk very quickly away. He didn’t understand why no one else wanted to join him with such glorious displeasure of bodily suffering. He snorted a glob of snot from the base of his sinuses down his throat to avoid hacking it out. When a flash of familiar white and red hair caught his attention at a near by cafe he happened upon. He looked over, there they were. His friends. Rexar, Biziil, Meeko, Kriia and Remi all at one table. Where were the others? He wondered silently to himself.

“I’m tellin’ you bro, dude, male hummingbirds are like MAD horny cause they got hella testosterone, I read it online,” Rex went on and on about the most random of facts that he had recently absorbed, while on another 14 hour acid trip, doom scrolling online.

“Nature is so beautiful,” Biz shook his head with a softened smile still finding the appreciation for the world and how it moves to grow and evolve. Meeko, however, looked over at her boyfriend and giggled almost unable to hold the childish expression written on her face.

“It’s something that’s for sure…” the ginger haired girl swung her feet, more or less keeping the inappropriate jokes to herself as she was seated on top of the table itself. Remi rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

“Nature is weird as fuck, and now I will never unknow that dude hummingbirds are just Perma horny,” the wolf also shook his head, but almost solemnly, as if this news really, genuinely, sat uncomfortably with him.

“Honestly, good for them,” Kriia laughed openly, which then gave Meeko the courage to giggle loudly right along side her. The boys shaking their heads with softened smirks at the two immature women.

Slowly, Alistar approached the congregation of friends, blackened hands in his pockets as he came to a halt at the perimeter. “Well Hello there, crew, what ar…huh…HI’H…HEhH’eEZSCHhh’iiEW!!” The demon sneezed outwardly onto the middle of the group, causing them all to recoil quickly and cover their own faces. A fine mist floating amongst them. Al breaking into a fit of coughs now.

“Fucking, ew, dude,” Remi glared hard at the red head scooting his whole chair back at least a foot from the table itself now. “I literally just got better, don’t even look at me with whatever weird, super demon virus you have,” the wolf looked disgusted, his emerald eyes narrowed and glaring daggers down at the sick cretin.

"Whoa, Al are you sick? I didn't think that was possible!" Meeko looked genuinely shocked, almost curious enough to inspect him closely but deciding it would be best to stay away. Al sniffled and slid his hand lazily over his dripping nose.

"It's fibe, I'm fibe...oh...no, my voide id weird now...." the redhead furrowed his brows.

"Yeah, I think you may need to go home and lay down..." Biz said cautiously, also taking a slow up and down look at the male. "You look terrible,"

"Yeah like a pile of dog shit run over, twice," Rex chuckled sparking up a joint with the snap of his index and thumb. "But if you manage to feel better later dude, you should come to my show! I'm spinnin out at the theatre, my family owns the venue so we can get hella rowdy," a cocky, charismatic smirk spread clear across his face, while everyone else's fell. Did he just invite the visibly ill demon to the show? In a small venue? Packed like sardines?

"Dawg...seriously?" Remi looked over at Rex, being the only one brave enough to actually speak up before Al could accept the invitation. Kriia shrugs her shoulders and puts a hand on the wolf's back.

"In his defense, he did say if Al felt better," the redheaded female spoke matter of factly, but still with an air of gentleness to defend her mate’s careless action.

"Yeah exactly, thanks babe," he winked at his girlfriend giving her a soft purse of his lips as if to kiss her from afar before taking another long dramatic drag of his jay. Alistar cleared his throat and stood his ground, shaking his head back and forth regardless how lightheaded that action made him feel, he cleared his throat to gain some composure.

"I'm fine! What time tonight? I'll definitely slide through," shrugging off the loving embrace of his illness to convince the rest of them he was actually completely fine. More than half of them, audibly groaned, Biz slapped his palm over his face.

“8pm sharp, that’s when I go on and rock everyone’s world,” he chuckled releasing a cloud of smoke in the wake of his excitement. He really just wanted to try and get a huge gathering going, he wanted as many people to see him as possible. He believed music could heal. Even if his music was of special taste.

“I wouldn’t miss it,” Al smirked as he pulled up a chair only for Biz to stop him, coming full stand and pressing an open palm to the demon’s chest.

“Go. Take. Meds. Rest. You’re not gonna hang around us and give us your disease, you’ll give it to my little bug here, and she’ll pass it to our love at home, and then I’m stuck nursing their weak immune systems back to health,” the two men furrowed their brows at each other, but Biz easily towered the redhead. Al grumbled and stepped back from the chair only for Kriia to speak up.

“Ah, come on Bizzy, what if he just stays within 6 feet of little Crickers here,” Meeko snapped her gaze to look at Kriia. She hated the nickname her brother gave her, she hated it worse when his friends used it. She folded her arms and huffed but remained relatively silent on the matter. Biz now narrowed his grey brows again at the female who put her hands up defensively. “Just tryna’ be accommodating my bad,” snickering at how serious the bear got.

“Come oooon Biz…” Al pleaded with his watery eyes, dripping nose and chapped lips not selling his argument any further.

“No, go home,” the silver haired man sat back down in his seat, knowing full well the demon wouldn’t challenge him any further.

“You’re a dick….I’ll remember this,” the anti-Christ squinted at the large man, who made eye contact over with Remi.

“Am I a dick, brother?” The polar bear asked his in law from across the table, who could only return the gaze with a hefty chuckle and shrug of his own large shoulders.

“You? A dick? Laughable,” his glowing emeralds moving slowly to gaze at the pouting dragon that could only cross his arms with annoyance and defeat.

“You’re all gonna be sorry,” quickly lifting two fingers up to his own Ruby red orbs, and pointing it back out to the group in front of him. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he tried to smirk, he tried to be his usual catty, elusive and sneaky self but his threats were followed in a violent series of coughs and yet another loud sneeze. “Hh’HeSHH’IEW!!”

“Alright man, well, we’ll see you at the show then,” Rex finally having checked back into the conversation after getting lost in his phone scrolling for a moment. He wasn’t too interested in the mindless squabbles. The rest of them looked at the pyro like he’d just farted amongst them. Yet, Alistar turned on his heels and went to lick is contagiously ill wounds.

Later that Night…

Rex was already behind the theatre, getting ready for his performance while the crowd piled in. Stage management making sure the jockey table was set up right. It was definitely a full house, and he probably could have anticipated it, but he was always shocked regardless. Biz, Meeko, and Kriia were all up front, securing their spot while Remi went to grab them drinks. “Bear, these shoes…are already starting to kill me…” the ginger haired girl complained, the heels she chose to wear out to the event were starting to make her feet throb.

“Do you want to go up on my shoulders, mouse?” He asked already turning to grab her by her waist.

“Hmm,” she looked down at the floor, trying to gauge the level of sanitation, and figured it couldn’t be that bad. “It’s okay, baby, can you just put my shoes in your backpack?” Already starting to unstrap them to hand over. Biz smiled softly and nodded, reaching out to let her hand them to him before he stuck them in his black Jansport.

“Better?” He asked her while she stood there for a bit but as she lifted and stepped her feet a few times, he was met with a look of disgust.

“Mmh..” she sort of muttered uncomfortably trying to hide the fact she was regretting this mistake upon realizing the floor felt….sticky.

“Here, mouse,” Biz bent down and took off his own captain laced boots, now standing in his socks and handing her his shoes. She grinned at him with a brightness that always brought him straight to his knees. A soft dust of pink fell over his cheeks and nose as he looked at her lovingly.

“Thank you, Bear,” hurriedly she slipped them on and tied them tightly so they wouldn’t slide off. Despite their naturally tight fit, the shoes were significantly bigger, however they worked out way better than the previous solutions.

“Absolutely, darling,” he leaned down to kiss her lips with a tenderness, a display that caused the red headed girl next to them to audibly respond.

“You guys are disgustingly adorable,” Meeko blushed brightly and grinned clinging tightly to her large partner’s arm. Biziil could only look down at his girl, enthralled by everything she did.

“Thanks Krii!” The orangette giggled before the lights started to go down, and the crowd began to push in. Remi slowly squeezed in from behind the group, shoving people with his knees as his hands were full of drinks.

“Here,” he grumbled, though it went unheard, the intro music starting to blare through the crowd. The group each took their respective drinks, began to sip on them as they awaited Rex to start his set. Remi slid next to Kriia in the front row, his hands grasping the barricade as the sea of people started to sway around them. The stage lights started to shine and change different colors against the performance area, the stage screen starting to display animated characters flashing to the beat of the music. The jockey table displayed as a matching puzzle piece to the main screen showing. Everyone began to cheer when the screens matched up to Rex’s artist logo. Meeko and Kriia both screaming and jumping with excitement. Biz and Remi remained in a stoic stance as they drank their beverages, stealing a glance at each other in response to the reactions of the women. Smirking at one another.

Unbeknownst to them, figuring he hadn’t healed up, Alistar was late to sliding through the entrance and security. He had a few too many items in his pockets against theatre rules. Grumbling angrily between sniffles and rubbing his nose with aggressive fervor, that his weed, pills, vodka flask and switchblade were all confiscated in order to enter. He almost went home. However, it was fine, he still had some stuff, hidden. Heavily bagged eyes scanned through the crowd, finding Biz, the tallest in the building up front with the rest of the crew. “Targets acquired,” the demon snickered loosely that followed with a loud and obscenely large spray of mess. “HEHH’DZSCHh’iEEW!!” Offending a few close by fans that became casualty to his sick. He could only audibly “SNNDDFF,” with a sly, charismatic grin at those he had wronged within the crowded space. Those of them having seen the shit eating expression, rolled their eyes.

Alistar started to move his way through the crowd which wasn’t hard, anyone who gave him an issue, took one good look at him and immediately wanted nothing to do with him. He looked worse than he had earlier in the day, his skin visibly glistening with sweat, darker grey than it had ever been, one eye completely blackened, the other his sclera black and iris still red. A terrifying face to be confronted with in a dark venue for many reasons.

The demon moved fast through the people and up to the back of the crew going relatively unnoticed as Rex came into set and began to raise his hands up, flames shooting from his fingers. “Let’s, FUCKING, GO!!!!” He shouted before launching into his first song as the music blared wildly, and bodies began to collide and crash together, Al took his opportunity. He hovered behind Biz and Meeko at first, the two were glued together and managing to get pickled right behind the both of them was honestly better than Al could ask for. He focused his darkened eyes and concentrated on the bright lights flickering about that eventually brought back that tickling, and thrilling sensation from moments ago. Oh it was coming, it was going to be a big one, his nose dripping already with anticipation as it hitched up through his sinuses to front and center. “Hih’AESSSHH’UE! SHH’UH! TCH-SHIEWW!” A short series of loud bursts came flying out of his open maw, but between the two sweating and the loud music, it went passed the couple’s ability to hear anything but filthy trap music. His bacterium floating within their spacing, Meeko consuming it within her unknowingly as she gasped to sing what lyrics she knew and the music itself, had. She was bouncing in her place, as Biz tried to cling to her side, his eyes fixated on the moving images on each screen unaware of the illness being spread quickly through both of them.

Despite the sound, and going undetected, both parties did feel the fine mist of saliva that hit their exposed parts of flesh, but thought nothing of it but maybe a spilled drink. Neither turned to notice the demon, nor that he was mouth breathing so openly behind them as the sudden force from the sneezes, lack of oxygen and lights were having an effect on his flesh vessel.

“Shit…” he gasped out loud to himself as he held his head in his palm. He could only grin. “You’re a tough little virus, aren’t you?” He thought to himself internally. Never mind that his vessel felt weakened, he allowed the dizziness only to fuel his desires. While the first half of the set he hovered over the unsuspecting couple, to make sure they were well marinated. Who knows if his plan would even come to be fruitful, as most times they were hit or miss. Yet, he wouldn’t squander the opportunity to at least make an attempt at his dreams. After all, that’s what being on earth was all about, no?

A few times the demon found himself having to duck behind others, trying to avoid being spotted by Remi when he’d leave and return with drink refreshments, which wasn’t terribly hard to do. The wolf wasn’t as entirely clever as Levi in spaces like these and wouldn’t go looking for someone ducked within the space of people in the crowd. His anxiety usually caused him to avoid most things. Something the demon has noted long ago. Once the coast was clear he just had to maintain a low profile, behind the large raven haired man. Shouldn’t be too hard. Kriia was definitely distracted enough, occasionally flashing Rex during his set. Rex couldn’t really see anyone past Kriia who knew just where to stand to be visible under the lights of his set blinding him. He smirked as he continued to perform. Al’s jaw fell open and his eyes watered over, spilling tears down his cheeks. His body prickled in goosebumps while a sharp gasp was the last thing he could control before he sneezed again, “Hih’AESSSHH’ue!!” just to the side of the woman, unnoticeably, another cloud of speckled spit ghosted through the atmosphere. Alistar sniffled, wiping his nose across his arm.

Remi was however, side eyeing the crowd, and had been, three drinks in he started to notice the swift flashes of red but…that’s Kriia? Right? On occasion he heard the slight snuffle of a stuffed nose coming from his right …no? His left? It caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up, desperate to lose himself in the music like everyone else. Yet, he couldn’t shake this feeling there was something hovering them.

Alistar, ducking back and forth, completely obtuse to the music just trying to keep himself from falling over and also being seen by the ever so observant man. ‘God, can’t he ever just chill the fuck out? I just want to get him sick, what’s the big deal? Just enjoy your music, stop worrying about what’s behind you, asshole,’ the demon thought internally in between snuffles and throat ripping coughs. He didn’t need to keep his volume down, the speakers were set close to front row. His actions all drowned out as he continued to skip back and forth between them all. He traced a finger down the center of Meeko’s back, and she shuddered, suddenly feeling very cold, almost woozy. She tried shaking it off, the feeling of a light touch caused her to stir, however she could only assume it was Bizzy just being affectionate. She pushed closer into the large man who wound up enveloping her, as the ginger haired woman now stood in front of the large bear man.

“Buzzkill,” Alistar thought as his access to the small woman was blocked. It’s fine, it would all be fine this was only the beginning. The set was coming to a close, Rex announcing he had two songs left. That mean’t the anti-Christ only had a few moments before they’d all meet up back stage in the dressing room. Biz sniffled, not really noticing the sudden feeling inside his nose, and Meeko the same. Kriia was feeling hotter than she normally would at a show, but Remi, he was the only one seemingly fine as he downed a 4th drink.

The demon just couldn’t get a proper in on the wolf, anytime he would get close, the large man just knew something was beside him. How was he going to….oooh he knew how. Pulling out of his sock was a single muscle relaxer, it would be enough to keep the larger from getting too violent. Don’t ask why the demon consistently carried different types of drugs on him. He just did. He crouched silently trying to stifle his sneezes and coughs, his focus completely on taking the large male off guard. He just needed him to look away from the drink for a second.

As Rex announced his last song, Remi finally decided maybe he would cut loose, they got this far into the set with no issues, why would there be any now? His drink hand lowered at his side while he rocked his head back and forth, eyes closed shut as he absorbed the music. This was his entrance, Al quickly lurched forward and dropped the pill into Remi’s awaiting beverage, it dissolved quickly mixing within the substance undetected, Al slid back and disappeared to the other side now. The lights continued to flash crazy, and the crowd pushed up against each other, Remi quickly lifting his drink to save it from spilling. Scoffing before deciding to just chug the rest and call it a night, tossing the cup onto the already dirty floor.

Alistar snickered with a lose and flemmy cough to follow. He decided to slide his way through the crowd and to the side of the audience, closest to where they’d be going to meet Rex in the back. He wanted to see all their faces when they realize he’d been in the sea of people with them. His irritated nose was still sopping and full, it throbbed on his face and he tried to desperately rub at it to soothe the irritating sting. “Not now, nosey! We have to save it! We have important plans for these germs….” As he spoke, he was just out of range of speakers to be heard by a stranger. Who he looked over to make eye contact with. He stared at the human, that blinked with confusion toward him. Alistar blinked his own crimson eyes as they stood in awkward silence.

“Forget I said anything,” his Ruby orbs now glowing brightly as the stranger now looked to have seen a ghost, but after a few moments, he blinked and looked around himself.

“Hey bro, you seen the merch table?” Suddenly asking the demon, who’s eyes had stopped shining at this point.

“Over there,” pointing a slender finger in the opposite direction to earn a nod and a lift of the other man’s index and middle to fashion a peace sign.

“Thanks bro,” seemingly forgetting about the sickly plotting Alistar had been doing just moments before. As the stranger made his journey away from Al, the red head waited patiently while the set came to an end and people started to clear out.

“It’s time,” Al snickered, moving his spindly legs through the venue and into the back area where he would meet a very sweaty and exhausted Rex, already sparking a joint as he walked down the stage stairs.

“Duuuuude! You made it!” Rex slapped the demon on his shoulder and grinned, taking a long hit off his joint and blowing it within the space between them, shoveling them both into the dressing room.

“I did indeed, friend, it was a very good show, energetic,” smirking to himself as he looked around the room to partake in any free refreshments. Only finding a buffet of different energy drinks, alcohols, mixers and candy. The redhead blinked but turned around to meet Rex face to face, almost startling him. “Oh…”

“Hey thanks!! You feelin any better dawg? You still look pretty shit,” noticing that Al’s scleras eyes were now entirely black, large purple bags floating under his eyes.

“Nah, but I wasn’t going to miss the first home show, come on now,” winking towards the pyro before a tight breath caught in his throat. “I-Uh..Hh’HhEhh…” at this same moment Alistar struggled to keep his secret sauce contained, Biz, Meeko, Kriia and Remi all came walking in. And the second Meeko toddled herself inside, and the door closed behind her? “HEH’EZSCHh’IEW!” And almost like a bomb was set off in the room, everyone else started to realize just how poorly they were starting to feel, Remi catching a face full of Al’s release. Immediately the wolf closes his eyes and brings his arm up to defend himself as a reflex, but it’s already too late.

“Fucking SICK, dude, why are you even HERE?? I should beat…” but as the raven haired male raised his fist to sock the shit eating grin right off Al’s smug face, his arm collapsed and he found himself much weaker, like all his muscles were asleep. He furrowed his brows. “What the fuck?”

There was a click on the other side of the door, Kanai locking the only way in and out of that room , from the outside, sitting on the floor. “Okay Donnie, door’s locked,” Biz turned around quickly to shoot a look at the door and then back at Al.

“Alistar, what are you doing?” His voice suddenly very stern, Meeko gripped the large man’s arm and buried her fevering face into it.

“Hnnn…” Biz’s eye twitched as he heard his girlfriend groan in discomfort, he knew that sound, he narrowed his eyes tighter.

“Hey, you all made ME feel like YOU GUYS…Snndfff…DONT WANT ME AROUND!” Swiping the underside of his nose with the back of his hand. “I don’t…Hh’…”

“Please cover your mouth, Al,” Biz sighed shaking his head, palm on his forehead as he tried to massage the incoming headache.

“H’HEHh’DZSCHh’UE!!!! PssffF-TSCH!!” His nose twitched and stretched as his mouth opened and fumbled against his sneeze. Bottom lip dripping as he drooled slightly, almost kind of regretting the fact he left home, cause a blowjob from his bestie sounds almost as good as this whole, revenge plan.

“hAGH’SHHHEUhh!” Now Biz was sneezing, like a sudden oncoming train it just smacked right into him. He looked almost completely bewildered. “So because we wanted you to…” he crunched his nose, wiggling it in tight circles to shove away, and scratch that building, insufferable, terrible itch. His whole body feeling hot. “We wanted you to stay home cause you’re SICK Alistar, not because we don’t LIKE you,”

“I don’t like you,” Remi admitted proudly with our hesitation. Biz sighed, trying to keep his train of thought.

“….Point BEING, Most of us here don’t have any issues with you, Al, genuinely, we just didn’t also want to get sick… and now…” he paused, the room starting to feel much faster now as everything spun around him, making it difficult to keep speaking.

“Eh’KSSHOO!!” Meeko sneezed into the side of her large, clammy boyfriend, he shuddered, blushing as he heard the loud squeak of his sweet Princess.

“Oh, Darling…” he looked down at her and wiped his index under her leaking nose to clear it from her softened face. Wiping his hands on his pants only to return the palm to her burning cheek.

“N-no it’s okay I-I’m Fibe…” sniffling weakly trying to push the attention away from her.

“Look it, Al! You’ve gotten us sick!” Kriia shouted feeling empathetic toward the suffering couple to her left.

“This doesn’t explain why I can’t lift my fucking arms to make him go lights out!” Now Remi chuffed in, angry and ready to head butt the demon if he so had to. Bite his flesh off bit by bit. He didn’t care.

“I may have slipped you something in the crowd….” The red head shrunk a few sizes as he could feel the incoming heat was about to face.

“WHAT?!” The wolf exploded with rage almost completely ready to do whatever means necessary.

“Look, maybe I was being a liiiiittttleee irrational…but can’t we just enjoy this? I don’t know if you all noticed….but I think we can all agree, this is going to be a good time….” Al lifted his hands up in defense, slowly, inching his way behind Biziil to keep the irate man from riping him to shreds with his teeth. Though, he raised a single red eye brow to further insinuate the cheeky pleasure of sin.

“Yeah assuming…Rex doesn’t set the place on fire and I don’t throw up because MY SISTER AND BROTHER IN LAW ARE TWO OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM,” the black haired male still yelled though each time he spoke with such force, it was taking more and more out of him, and the virus only worked through his blood faster.

“Okay well, it’s fun for me, I just thought If I could paint the illusion that it’s a benefit for you, we could move on from this conversation,” Al shrugged his shoulders still perched behind the large polar bear man.

“I’m going to kill him,” Remi narrowed his eyes and looked up at Biziil this time.

“You can’t keep killing him,” the larger shook his head.

“But it feels good…regardless,” now looking away like a kicked puppy, he mumbled loosely.

“Okay, look, I’ll just have Kanai open the door, it’ll be fine….NAI, LET EM OUT,” he grumbled almost, while still speaking loudly enough for the hell hound to hear. Yet, there was no sound to be heard…silence.

Unknown to all of them, Kanai had barricaded the door, making sure it was secure just as Alistar instructed of him. However, Al did not say he could not explore the theatre…and there was so much to learn about human entertainment! He couldn’t resist taking a peak around.

“Is he …okay?” Kriia asked quietly , her own features flushed, her eyes lowered not just cause she’d been sharing a joint with Rex as they watched all this unfold, but she was not feeling very well, whatsoever.

“…Nai?!” Al called out again now sweating from illness AND nerves because the longer the silence went the closer Remi inched toward the demon. In turn, Al would step two inches away every time he did. “Okay…so…we might be trapped here for a bit…”

“Biz, are you SURE I can’t kill him???” Out stretching his arms to try and strangle the panicking red head.

“I’m sure, too many consequences…you’ll have to hear from Drae,” Remi shuddered at this realization. He would. Drae chastised him every time he sent the demon back to which he came. All because that one time he didn’t come back. Whatever. The wolf sighed and rolled his eyes, lowered his arms and the began sitting on one of the couches provided.

“Guess we just have to wait for idiot #2 to come back,” he finally spoke, allowing the fire to calm into a fizzling steam within him.

“Hey, that’s my idi-….Hhh’…” Alistar went to interject but found himself struggling to get it out.

“Oh for fucks sake can you just close your mouth!” Remi shouted tossing a nearby coaster at the anti-christ. It missed him just by an instance as the demon lurched forward and dodged it by blowing out.

“HIH’AESSSH’UE!” He sneezed loudly, directly across him, toward the pyro, without much conscious thought to it, truthfully.

“Oh, god…” Rex wiped off his face as the spray hit him directly in the mouth. Kriia smirked, reaching over to wipe it off with her loving thumb.

“Just got sneezed on by a Demon, babe, that’s lowkey kind of hot…” the white and red haired male looked over at his girlfriend, matching her grin and shrugging it off.

“Gotta try everything at least once,” now acting as if his intuits response wasn’t genuinely how he felt. However, if Kriia was into it, he was into it.

“I heard that,” she smirked back at him reaching up to kiss him tenderly. Their arms entangling around one another regardless of the others around them.

“Guys…can we be ss…H-..Hh’RSHH’hiiu!!” The bear snuffed loudly, taking the tissue Meeko took out of her purse to give him. “Thank you, Mouse,” he mustered that same gentle smile he always gave her.

“Nini id godda be do updet…” she sighed shaking her head solemnly, knowing all too well their poor girlfriend was going to be shocked at their current state of health.

“She is…but it’s…ah’KESHhh’yiew…just is what it is…” he sighed and the small ginger haired woman giggled reaching up with another tissue to dab, and wipe his leaking eyes and then poor reddening and pierced nose. Trying to be careful, and clean the metal as well to keep it from crusting over.

“S’k we take good care ob you baby,” reaching up to kiss him but she was caught by the sudden storm brewing from within her own sinuses. “HA’AETTCCHH’uh!” Her spit hitting Biziil directly in the middle of his once cleaned face, now undoubtedly wet again. He blushed brightly, trying to hide the fact he found it undoubtedly adorable of her to do such a thing. He cleared his throat.

“Oh! ..Bless you…darling,” Biz quickly started to dab at his face with the tissue he had clasped in his own hand, and then her face as well.

“S-Sorry B-Bear…I..” she started to apologize but was quite swiftly cut off.

“Shh..it’s quite alright, mouse, it’s not your fault…it’s his,” he looked over at Al who was ogling perversely at the two, an obvious line of drool falling from the corner of his mouth before he loudly slurked it back up and looked away, clearing his scratchy throat. “Stop enjoying this,” Biz narrowed his gaze.

“I can’t help it! It’s not my fault you’re all relatively sexy and now …afflicted with my demon germs…it’s wonderful,” he wiped a single tear from his eye as he felt warm and fuzzy all over.

“Hh—hEhTXSSHhh’ih…iit’shHIEW…FUCK!” Remi cursed loudly as he sneezed despite his best attempts to keep the rest from becoming aware. Too late, stewing in this small room only a few feet from everyone around him sneezing, his own terrible immune system failing him yet again. “How the fuck did it happen so fast?!”

“I predict the fact that I am not from here…probably mutated the virus…theoretically…of course,” the red head shrugged his tired, heavy shoulders.

“heT’CHXOO!!” Rextar now but instead of a fine mist of saliva, no it was a cloud of flames, everyone quickly jumped back, Kriia only moved slightly to the side, rubbing his back gently. “Shiiiit…sorry guys..sndfff,” rubbing his nose on the back of his performance hoodie sleeve.

“You only mildly scorched the carpet, no biggie, we can pay the damages,” Kriia shrugged trying to assure her boyfriend that everything was fine, minus the trapped in a room full of sick individuals that can’t stop sneezing, thing. Everyone looked at each other with pitiful sunken eyes, every other sound a sniffle or cough. It was roughly a 300 square ft space, it more or less, didn’t have a whole lot of elbow room. Everyone could be at most, 3 feet away from the other person.

“Dude, I’m so going to kick your ass once I have full mobility,” the wolf groaned, slumping in his chair with his head thrown back, thumb and index pinching the bridge of his nose. The thudding echoed from the center of his head to the rest of his body, he felt miserable, all he wanted was his little leopard, rubbing his head and making him soup. He lifted his head up enough to try and pull out his phone but it was pointless, there wasn’t any service in here. “Fuuuuuuck!!!” He groaned loudly throwing his head back again but the quick motion only forced the itch back up his bridge, and tickling his throat, he bit his lower lip tightly.

Alistar grinned sliding closer to the wolf trying to be quiet but was pulled backed with a tight hand on his wrist. Turning his head he was met with another ice cold stare from Biz.

“No,” the demon sighed and stood back again, crossing his arms.

“Sit,” and though everything inside of his aching vessel screamed at him to defy the large Inuit man, he decided against it and simply sat, crossing his arms.

“Fine but you can’t stop me from…” twitching and and stretching his nose with purpose before sticking his blackened index tip against the edges of his nostrils tickling it carelessly. “Hhah’AETTTSHH’uh!!! H’ETSCHU! HN’CH!” Loudly, proudly, like he had something to prove, which he did. Despite the fact they all realized he came to the show sick and had spread his germs on to them, and wanted out, they couldn’t. They’re stuck here with him. As well as the constant puffs of sickly sprays that shot from his wet lips.

“Stooooop!” Remi groaned with an exaggerated sigh to finish it, he would kill to turn these lights off right now.

“Uuuggghh….” Kriia wiggled a bit back and forth grabbing at her boyfriend’s arm. “This is too much…” feeling a mixture of embarrassment as she was turned on and terribly terribly ill.

“What’s…” but before he could get the words out..

“Ht’tchkt!!! Hhh’nGNxxt!” It was Kriia’s turn to lose control, trying to send the second into Rex’s other sleeve, but finding it hard to find privacy in such a position. She snuffled loudly, wiping her face loosely back and forth on the fabric. Rex blushed, brighter than his already sun kissed cheeks currently were. He tried to clear his throat, while he allowed his girlfriend to intimately release onto him and use his clothing as a rag.

“B-Bless you, baby,” considering maybe even just giving the demon what he wanted, a show, but he shook his head, no, not the right place or time.

“Oooo look at you two, see, I knew someone would enjoy this! We are making VALUABLE memories right now,” he tried to pull out his phone but before he could even open the app, Remi grabbed the device in one quick swoop and hucked it across the room. It shattered against the wall.

“Don’t be a fucking creep!” The wolf practically towered over him now. Fuck he was fast. Alistar rolled his eyes and lifted his palms up in defense.

“I was simply going to see…if I could contact K, that is all, I wasn’t up to anything and frankly I’m insulted you’d accuse me,” the two men stared each other down. Remi refused to believe his innocence.

“There’s no service, you know that,” slanting his dulling emerald eyes even further in accusation toward the demon.

“I forgot?” Al raised a thin red brow before suddenly he was taken by the throat, as if his head hadn’t been pounding as it was, it surely increased with the lack of oxygen to his brain now as Remi squeezed his fingers around him.

“Forgot?? Is that a question? See? Why should we ever trus-….” His eyes widened, his grasp slightly weakened just before Biz could finish standing back up to stop the man…./it/ happened.

“-hd’ISCHhh!! HI’DTSCHIEW!!” Almost like granddad finally heard him, like he was calling Alistar on speed dial. ‘Hello my son…I grant you…this blessing….’

“Thank you, Granddad….” He thought internally as a large gesture of spiddle and debris hit his entire face, Remi feeling mortified in between snuffling, he quickly let go and leaped back. Alistar realizing now, he didn’t think what he said, he had spoken it. Now the wolf was half across the room rubbing his nose from under his hoodie, almost feeling dirty, like he needed a hot shower.

“You’re fucking vile,” the raven haired male glared, turning his back.

Alistar shrugged his shoulders, not even a hint of shame written on his face, but satisfaction. “I’ve gotten what I wanted out of this, I don’t know about any of you…” he smirked before he wiped a straying trail from under his nose with the back of his hand but not the wet from Remi’s previous sneeze.

“I mean I got to play my show and once we are out of this me and Kri are def gon-..et’TCHOOO! etCHXIEW!!” Throwing his head in an upward direction to keep his heated blow outs from singeing anyone’s eyebrows clean off their faces. Regardless, a mistral of flames spewed out of him, smoke following out his nose as he slurped loudly to contain any of his salivic mess. Kriia bit her lower lip and just continued her motions of assuring and comforting back rubs. Her nails digging every so often.

“Oh, you already know me…” licking her lips before reaching to brush a few strands of his red locks away from his tear stained white and ruby eyes. They shared a moment together, while Alistar could barely contain himself. This was more than enough mental storage for later tonight. Endless imagery. If Alistar had a choice a of favorite sneeze in the room, it was Rex’s, because it came with a dark edge of danger. Nothing better than a sneeze followed by, FIRE?! Are you KIDDING ME?! This was enough to last him a life time.

Just when it was starting to get good, they all collectively heard a series of thuds at the door.

“Al, you done yet?” Kanai’s voice echoed from behind it, everyone feeling a sense of ease and relief but Al hummed lightly an index and thumb at his chin. Considerably, he could tell the hound no, and stretch this out for a painfully long time. However, he wasn’t sure how long it would take for the wolf’s blood to burn out that muscle relaxer and beat the dog shit out of him, it seemed to already be weakening. Having gotten this far alone, was a win. Best to not push his luck.

“A while ago.. why the fuck did you leave post???” He yelled back toward his best friend, when a moment of silence rolled by before the hound had any nerve to respond.

“It’s a historical theatre, Al, and you didn’t tell me I had to man the post, just barricade the door until you said, so…mind you, I did,” almost a slight edge of sass to his usually monotoned communications. He was spending too much time with that bratty pet of theirs, Drae.

“Okay, smartass, open the fucking door then,” Al hucked his foot toward the wood, making a loud banging sound. Remi snorted, trouble in paradise. He couldn’t relate since he and Levi made such a good team. They heard a serious of bangs and shifts of metal against the wood when suddenly, it came swinging open.

“If I am a smart ass does that mean it’s a compliment? Typically one’s ass does not have a brain, so therefore it has no intelligence…with that being said would tha-….” Alistar took his full blackened hand and palmed the center of Kanai’s face before pushing him clear out the door frame entryway.

“Just take me home,” shaking his head back and forth with a roll of his tired ruby orbs. As they all relatively sighed with relief and began to walk out, Biz quickly grabbed Al by the shoulder and turned him around

“Hey Al?” He spoke softly, almost suspiciously kind.

“Yeah?” Al looked at the taller male, cautiously but curiously still.

“I don’t hate you….Connie adores you, in some strange way, and I respect that…so I want you to know that despite how Remington may openly feel, me and my girls do not hate you…okay? You’re always welcome over…” the grey haired man opened his heart, and metaphorically his arms to the demon. His girl saw something in him that was more than difficult for anyone else to, but he would do anything to make amends for those thoughts that may play inside the redhead’s brain. If only for her.

“Oh…uh…thanks, Biziil…I appreciate that…but you know, I don’t, really feel that way right? I was just trying to stop Remi from serving me rare to the gates of Hell,” he chuckled, slightly shocked that the large man, cared about how he might feel if the group really did hate him. Regardless, they were friends of his pet, and in turn just more toys to play with. It was not important to him whether or not they liked him.

“Well, whether or not it was true, I just want you to know that there are people on this plain of existence that care about you….if you ever do, start to feel, anything,” the large bear followed with a chuckle, and it almost made the demon think deeply on it for a second before Meeko came stumbling out behind him.

“Bear…hot bath…home…pleeeeeaaaasssseee….” She whimpered slamming her forehead onto the middle of his back, arms slumped at her sides.

“Oh sweet girl…as you wish,” Biz quickly wrapped his strong tatted arm around her shoulders and brought her close to him before he turned to look at Al with a wink. Disappearing to the parking lot. As everyone else made their way home, Kanai walked with Alistar out to their own car.

“Where’s Drae?” The red head asked loosely, almost as if it didn’t really matter in the first place.

“He’s at home in bed watching some human drama show you like, because he misses you,” Kanai responded, unlocking the doors to the vehicle as they approached it.

“Jeez, he’s so needy,” shaking his head back and forth but feeling a slight…tingle in the base of his chest at the thought.

“He is quite persistent of our company, that must be a human thing…I have to research it when we get home…” mumbling now to himself as his brain started ticking away at the theories and possibilities.

“Okay nerd brain, just take me home so I can get my dick sucked at the LEAST with this fucking head cold I have….” He groaned rubbing at his temples. “I just know the orgasm is going to be fucking mind blowing,” unable to stop himself from snickering pridefully as they slid inside the car.

“I can imagine it would be a nice change of pace to have that feeling whilst also afflicted with that terrible one at the same time…might even possibly cure you…let me know,” the grey one looked over from the driver seat before the red head shot the hound a finger gun and a cheeky wink.

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To Be Continued?!

Author’s Notes: I’m so sorry this took so long and IS so long?! Uncle Fucking Christ! (Sorry I love saying that) anyway I decided to do a part two for when Alistar comes home and Drae helps him feel relief (; it’ll be a lemon one shot Part 2 which should be easier for me to crack out than a full fic with 6 characters to keep track of Lmfao. Thanks for supporting mine and Geez’s characters! We appreciate the love it really is just the best 🥰 It’s nice to create for fun and have others just simply enjoy it for what it is. All my love 🫶🏻 @aller-geez owns Meeko, Remi, Rex, Kriia and Kanai! (also Draeko who was mentioned!)

[abitofafreudmoment]

HELLO IRL FRIEND OF NICO

i have noticed that you are into discworld and would like to hear more about it bc i am interested in reading it but am incapable of getting into anything unless it's been hyped up to me enough and you seem like you'd be willing to ramble lovingly about this series so uhh. favorite characters? what's it about? themes? fun tidbits?

(no pressure though and sorry if this is a weird way to introduce myself hi im luce)

lol no worries Luce! yes I'm very happy to ramble for you. (post-writing here, this is so all over the place sorry for like not sticking to one area but hey it's defos a loving ramble - kinda just talked about vague stuff, but I can 100% go into specifics).

So. . . where do I begin?

40 books in the series, he wrote right up until his death. NOT a continuous plotline through all 40. In fact, I recommend not starting with the first one (two actually)as it's not spectacular (that being said, it is still worth reading once you're in the series, good for the overall worldbuilding if memory serves). below is a sorta ok guide to how they connect - I have my issues with it but it's the best I've found.

I wouldn't recommend starting with Sourcery, but that's cuz Rincewind isn't my favorite character - I'd start with either equal rites or Lords and Ladies or Mort or The Truth or The Fifth Elephant or just wherever really as long as it isn't the Colour of Magic or the Light Fantastic.

A few crucial ordering things - READ THUD AND SNUFF (and ig Making Money and Going Postal) BEFORE RAISING STEAM. READ THIEF OF TIME BEFORE NIGHT WATCH. Those are the really imperative ones that you gotta order right, generally do it vaguely chronologically and yeah. Have at it.

The Hedgehog Song - this is a tidbit that shows up a lot in the Witches books as a very rude song that Nanny Ogg sings, BUT WE NEVER GET THE WORDS and I so want them.

Because it was written over 32 years, there are so many characters that just like slowly worm their way into it and I love watching a character turn from like a single footnote into a fully-fledged, important-to-the-plot character (I'm looking at YOU, Cassanunda)

SPEAKING OF FOOTNOTES OMG the books are riddled with them and. . . chef's kiss they add So Much to the series. They're so funny.

Pratchett is actually just like so funny as an author in general, but wittily so. Not saying he does pure comedy - he doesn't. Many a time have I cried over a Pratchett book. He's also great at taking stuff and . . . twisting it ig into something brilliantly new - Take, for instance, Maskerade, which is the Phantom of the Opera but Pratchettifyed (New word! yay! I'll be using it a lot I'm sure.). or like just what he does with Fairy Tales in general (Witches Abroad, Lords and Ladies sorta)

Also his MAGIC omg - soft magic system done right. I also love like the different approaches to magic that the witches and wizard have to it. Also how like the Creatures from the Dungeon Dimensions get [spoilers removed]

The gods man. Love them. They exist, they feed off of raw belief (Small Gods' premise is that people start believing in the institution formed around a god as opposed to the god itself and then that god like almost dies cuz no-one believes in him. (surprise surprise it's a commentary on the Church)) and they play games with the lives of men (the Last Hero). Love Granny Weatherwax's opinion on them which goes smthn like this: "No use believin' in 'em, it only serves to encourage 'em." <-- As a concept belief is not simply tied to the gods either. He does a lot of stuff about how what people believe to be true can affect how they perceive things around them.

THE FOOLS. Pratchett understood the tragedy of clowns and as such his fools are so insanely sad - the Fools' Guild is the least happy of all the guilds. I love them so much

Speaking of guilds: the Guild of Thieves. is a legit guild set up by Vetenarii to do crime to the socially acceptable level and no higher - I'm doing a bad job explaining it but it's ingenious.

Vetenarii is probably one of my favorite characters in the entire series. He, above all else, understands how humans work and he uses that skill to get people to do what he wants.

Pratchett does not pull the punches when it comes to messaging and such - very anti-war, anti-racism, anti-sexism etc. Also love what he does with People and how they can/can't be controlled (The human condition as a whole ig) - one of my fav quotes from the series is Vimes saying "They're scared. You can't expect much from people when they're scared."

My personal fav book is Monstrous Regiment, which is relatively standalone. Very good. Very "horrors of war"-y with a touch of the classic [redacted due to spoilers].

I could go on, but this post is getting very long so if I do continue I'll do it in another post.

TL;DR: Pratchett = FUCKING BRILLIANT

[thewoodbinewitch]

I'm thinkin bout old people again, and how working in an assisted living/ dementia home opened my eyes to so much going on in aging. How their disabilities aren't being met in a place meant to meet disabilities. How the workers are overworked so they're napping behind the desk rather than spending time with their residents. How their drive to do fulfilling things persists despite the system treating them uniformly. How one activity person is definitely not enough.

The deaf woman didn't have tv captions or an aide she just sat and colored and was communicated to via whiteboard. She was a musician who raised a large family of musicians. When we made cupcakes she had an expert hand since she raised her seven brothers and sisters in addition to her seven kids. She used to sneak out to dance with boys when she was young.

The 80 year old lady from Sri Lanka didn't think she was going to live this long. She wanted to go home to die. She felt trapped in this prison and would act out to get visits from her family. She loved playing word games and Bingo and always helped clean up after each activity. She walked around like a teacher, hands behind her back, observing the people. She liked to take her food, which she hated to eat, and try to feed the squirrels. Her favorite song was que sera sera. There's nothing like a room of people with dementia all singing que sera sera.

The British ballet teacher always wanted to go out and was best friends with the deaf lady. The Vietnamese pharmacist insisted on wearing every hat she could find and had a gallery wall of her own art. The residential school survivor loved to kiss her puppy toy and would have him sit in other people's laps when they were sad. The 100 year old Black woman would tell me about her church and tell me the ladies who dressed her every morning needed Jesus. The divorcee who loved puffins would pray with me to end the suffering of her family who obviously were suffering which is why they never visited.

The disabled-all-her-life clown was so proud of her husband's awards at Disney and gave me insider performance secrets. She always wished me luck on theatre. So did the veteran lighting designer who did the lights for all the exhibits at the local science and industry museum for 40 years. He's mentioned in my design textbook.

These are people I knew. Some of them I saw die. And it makes you think about how we will one day, chance willing, grow old, become disabled, and die. We gotta be prepared for it because the system itself sucks. Half these quirks were things to be solved because there's only so much chaos a facility can handle and because the system penalizes "problem" behavior

TLDR old people are important to get to know because they're fascinating and wonderful and also terrifying because one day that will be you and you've got to prepare for it

[feyd-meowtha]

“So you survived the night,” Kenny said, his hands in his pockets and a smug little smile on his face. “Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Curt said with a shrug.  Play it cool. “Honestly, that doesn’t really surprise me, I’d be more surprised if you did remember. Though I will actually be a bit offended if you’ve forgotten me entirely,” said the man with a chuckle. It was quiet and mostly to himself, no doubt triggered by the memory of whatever drooling mess Curt had made of himself the week before.  This time he was wearing a pale yellow polo shirt and white trousers. On most people it would have looked twee, maybe a little preppy, but contrasted with his tattoos and mussed hair it just looked boyish and charming. Curt wanted to push him into the dirt.

“Hey, didn’t anyone ever teach you it’s not fair to kick a guy when he’s down?” Curt responded, sticking his own hands in his pockets and milking the poor me act for all it was worth, hopeful of getting at least a snigger out of the guy. He had tried a variety of techniques over the course of his life but he had found that making a guy laugh was the surest path to making him come. He didn’t have much wisdom to share but he had that.  Luckily, it worked.  “I’m sorry,” he said, hanging his head slightly and looking up through his lashes. “That was mean, you’re right. I'm sorry. Though I am actually glad that you’re alright, really. Your friend was very worried about you.” 

“Rosie?” Curt asked, strangely touched. As Rosie had told it he was just pissed at him for ruining his night, so it was nice to receive some confirmation that he was also concerned about Curt’s wellbeing, even if it were secondary to hating his guts for being an irresponsible moron. “There was a bloke in an orange t-shirt and a really tall, loud guy with a moustache who was yelling something about Princess Dianna.”  Curt winced at the idea that a severely inebriated Bucky had been allowed anywhere near innocent bystanders. 

“Yep, that would be Rosie and Bucky. Hope he didn’t bother you with the Diana stuff. I know how you guys feel with the whole, uh, people’s princess thing. For what it’s worth I think she’s hot as hell, seems like a real nice lady too,” he said, grimacing slightly at what he had just said.   “No, not at all. He asked me if I thought Charles was a, and I quote, ‘massive, wrinkly prick’. I agreed, obviously, and he seemed pretty happy to leave it at that. Then the two of them whisked you away into your pumpkin carriage and drove you away to safety.”  “No-one’s safe when they’re around that fuckin' clown, I’ll tell ya that. I spent the rest of the night face down on Bucky’s floor in a pool of my own drool. The whole thing was very glamorous. Needless to say it wasn't exactly my finest moment, but in my defense, it was 100% Bucky’s fault. Don’t believe him if he tells you otherwise, that man is a snake, I tell you, a wolf dressed as a...”  “Drunken idiot?” Ken ventured. “Exactly.” A look of fondness flashed over Ken's face as he reached out to pat Curt on the shoulder, the smaller man almost dizzy with elation at the fact that this was going so unexpectedly well.  “Happens to the best of us, mate,” he said with a smile, “tell you what, I’ll make you a deal.”  “Okay,” replied Curt, one eyebrow raised.  “Buy me a drink and we can give it another go.” 

[tepkunset]

X-Men Evolution ft. Alpha Flight

Been enjoying X-Men Evolution recently, and it made me think about how great an Alpha Flight episode could've been. Hell, there was a Captain America one, so why not?

Anyway, some thoughts about what an Evolution version of the characters might be like:

KIDS -

JEAN-PAUL BEAUBIER / NORTHSTAR:

Age 16, Québécois

Super-speed, flight, can create blinding light by linking with his sister

A jerk, but in his defence is straight up not having a good time. Only does homework for the classes he likes

Backstory only semi-unlocked because it's none of these clowns's business: Kid on his way to being an Olympic-level skier who is hinted to having been blackmailed into joining AF by Guardian, but mostly remains for the sake of his twin sister he only recently reunited with

I didn't bother designing new superhero outfits for JP and JM because why mess with existing perfection?

JEANNE-MARIE BEAUBIER / AURORA:

Age 16, Québécois

Super-speed, flight, can create blinding light by linking with her brother

Either very outgoing and bubbly or very shy and quiet, (depending on if she's Aurora or Jeanne-Marie of course). Definitely forgot about the homework

Backstory unlocked: Raised in a very old-fashioned Catholic boarding school hinted at to be abusive, until running away as Aurora and was found and recruited by Guardian. Really not sure how her DID might be handled in a kid-friendly cartoon, but I think it should still be present because I don't see why children can't be educated on such things

I originally had her civvies designed to reference her 2.0 yellow costume, but then I liked the idea of JM wearing blue and JP wearing pink too much

MARRINA SMALLWOOD:

Age 14, Newfoundlander

Super-speed underwater, can breathe underwater as well as on land

Just happy to be here; tries too hard to seek validation from everyone older than her. Agonizes over not being able to go to public school due to her looks

Backstory unlocked: Was adopted by a small coastal family and raised in a very happy environment, joined AF because she wanted to see more of the outside world and genuinely believes Guardian is teaching them to do good

I literally just drew her in a wetsuit for a superhero outfit lol

ELIZABETH "LIZ" TWOYOUNGMEN / TALISMAN:

Age 15, Albertan / Tsuut'ina

Deus ex machina mystic powers

Running on anxiety and bitterness towards Guardian. Won't let you copy her homework but will help you with your own for as long as it takes

Backstory unlocked: She and her father were recruited to Alpha Flight as what she believes is a PR stunt for so-called Reconciliation. Her magic circlet helps her control her mystical powers, but unlike in the comics she's capable of taking it off

Of all the characters I was most excited to design a new age-appropriate look for her, since 90% of her outfits in the comics look like they're racist Spirit Halloween costumes

ANNE MCKENZIE / SNOWBIRD:

Age 17, Nunavummiuq / Inuk

Animal shape-shifting

Easily forgotten from being so quiet, very prim and proper behaviour that can sometimes come off as up-tight. Studies above and beyond regular homework because she feels like she has to work twice as hard to be respected

Backstory semi-unlocked: With her parents divorced, Anne was used to spending the school year down south with her father and summer up north with her mother, but when her powers started manifesting, her father scorned her and wanted to give up his custody. Instead she now spends her school year under the care of Department H

I hate Snowbird's comic backstory so much; the whole "she's 100% white because her mother was a goddess who temporarily transformed into a white woman to appeal to her white father" makes zero sense and also has gross connotations, so I decided since this is my adaptation, she's not a demigod but rather just a mutant, because why not...

I thought about giving her tunniit, but since I know so little I figured I wasn't the best person to depict them

WALTER LANGKOWSKI / SASQUATCH:

Age 17, British Colombian

Super-strength, super-stamina (when in gamma form)

Biggest nerd in any room, pretty chipper. Will do your homework for you just for fun

Backstory unlocked: Walter was taken in by Department H after being branded as a failed experiment by a group of scientists playing with gamma radiation—except the experiment didn't fail, turning Walter into a gamma mutate, but one with control over himself and the transformation

I had such a hard time trying to decide what to do with this bitch... His power is to turn into a 'cryptid' that is just lifting from spirits across multiple Indigenous cultures so that's really awkward, but I didn't want to leave him out since that felt weird? I do imagine this version of him having a different personality though, where he's less annoying

ADULTS -

JAMES MACDONALD HUDSON / GUARDIAN:

Age 35, Ontarian

Flight and super-strength granted by super-suit

Thinks acting like a Cool Dad™ will make children like him. Believes recruiting kids to work for the government is justified because they have superpowers, but at the same time hypocritically insults the X-Men

Backstory unlocked: Oil corporation research and developer who designed a super-suit for oil extraction, except then the Canadian government put him on the payroll to head Department H for monitoring superhumans in Canada

I knew I still wanted him to be decked out with the maple-leaf because it fits his asshole nature, but I wanted to make him look like he's trying too hard to be Hip

MICHAEL TWOYOUNGMEN:

Age 40, Albertan / Tsuut'ina

Healing mystic powers

Is the actual Cool Dad because he's so chill and actually cares about the well-being of the kids

Backstory Unlocked: A surgeon who turned to traditional medicines in attempt to save his wife when western medicine failed her, and though he he did not succeed, he did discover he had innate mystical powers, putting him on Department H's radar. Just here to protect and patch up the children the best he can

EUGENE JUDD / PUCK:

Age 42, Saskatchewanian

Super-durability

Says thinks like 'back in my day' and 'eh' unironically way too much, low-key waiting on that inevitable divorce between the Hudsons

Backstory semi-unlocked: Is mostly there to train the kids how to be superheroes and survive the experience

Like Snowbird I think Puck's backstory is some bullshit that they should've just left alone instead of trying to create this magic explanation for his dwarfism and chronic pain... just let him be disabled! Disabled superheroes exist! So again, in this version he's just a mutant who happens to also have dwarfism and chronic pain

HEATHER MCNEIL-HUDSON:

Age 37, Albertan

Guardian's wife, tries to be a Team Mom and make up for her annoying husband

[wicked-violets]

Silly goofy stuff about William Afton. ;)

He hates soda and most bubbly drinks. He’ll only drink ginger ale when sick. He prefers hot drinks over cold drinks. It can be 100 degrees outside and he’ll still enjoy a hot cup of herbal tea.

He is afraid of mice and rats.

He doesn’t like snakes or lizards either.

He is a light sleeper and any little noise can cause him to wake up.

He is vegetarian and will only eat meat on special occasions such as holidays and birthdays.

William hates being called “Bill” or “Billy” Just call him Will. Not “Willy” either. If you call him any of those things, he will never speak to you ever again.

He grew up loving clowns and rabbits. Hence why a lot of his animatronics are rabbits and clowns lmao

Neither William or his sister ever met their biological fathers and probably never will. Their mother never had pictures of their fathers or anything. Their mother also loved parties and unprotected sex so I meannn, they’re never gonna meet their bio dad.

When William was only ten years old, he was the one who found his sister’s body after she hung herself. His sister was not only a relative of his but she was his best friend as well. From that day on, he grew his obsession with death and immortality. This only worsened when his own children began dying off.

It took William a few years to grow any form of attachment to his son, Michael. Before that, he wouldn’t even agree to hold his infant son. For the first three years of Michael’s life, he was completely ignored by his father. Same went for Evan as well. The only child he really paid any attention to was Elizabeth. And even then, he wasn’t a very good father at all. William was neglectful.

William never wanted to be father, he never thought he would be a good father.(and I mean he was correct. He was a terrible father) But, his ex-wife on the other hand, though she could change him. Unfortunately, changing him was impossible and her children was raised only by herself and a nanny. William hired a nanny so his ex-wife wouldn’t have to raise her children alone. He had enough decency to hire a nanny for her.

William didn’t seem to love his children. He definitely didn’t act like he even liked them due to him being so neglectful. However, he did genuinely felt love towards them. And he is filled with regret with how he raised them. He was just never meant to be a father.

There’s a extremely high chance that Evan was the product of cheating. Since, William quit sleeping in the same room as ex-wife. Suspiciously, during that time she was hanging out a lot with her ex-boyfriend.

William made his ex-wife’s death look like a suicide. He never explained why or what lead to this. Perhaps she cheated on him again? Or maybe she found out about the remnant experiments and the murders? Or maybe she ran off to get pregnant again and William was just done fathering children that wasn’t even his. However, even though he grew to hate that woman, he became extremely depressed after her death. He still doesn’t know why he spent weeks crying over her or missing the sound of her voice. Perhaps he didn’t hate her after all, or maybe he was just codependent. Either way, William was absolutely miserable both when she was alive and after her death.

William’s ex-wife wasn’t the only one who wasn’t faithful. William would spend the night at Henry’s house. As you see, William and Henry was doing a lot more than sleeping. Actually throughout that toxic marriage between them, William never stopped spending time at Henry’s house.

At some point William tried to convince Henry to run away with him and they could just start new and have a family of their own. Obviously, Henry thought William was insane for saying this and gave him the silent treatment for weeks. (Even though Henry was guzzling Mr. Afton’s glizzy every weekend. This still sounded crazy to him.)

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

i’m responding to this message and sharing via screenshot because if i reply regularly, i won’t be able to block this dump heap’s IP address from successfully sending me asks. buckle up! what they said is in response to this:

if you think you’re going to step into my ask box on some “emvan just had a toxic relationship, evan was not a victim” bullshit in the form of a novel-length message, your IP address will be blocked and it’ll be the last one from you i see. don’t worry, i know how to type, too. you absolutely will not have a platform to victim blame and try and give credibility to a false narrative that pulls harmful allegations out of thin air. that is irresponsible and offensive on many levels. no one with a functioning brain inside their skull takes your garbage opinion seriously or wants to be nauseated by the stench of your disgusting (lack of) morals on this blog. but allow me to take you to task below.

1. evan’s girlfriends are not “always” portrayed as as the bad guy. you do not hear people speaking negatively about alexia, alexandria or haley except for the group of people who are jealous and will hate any woman their fav is dating. which is a different conversation and quite frankly should not even be entertained.

2. we are not just hearing one side of the story. if there are 100 negative stories, anecdotes, rumors, blind items AND emma was arrested for DV, it’s not that there is only one side of the story being portrayed - she is simply the only one raising hell and being an abusive monster to evan and everyone else in her vicinity. you are a sick and disturbed individual to try and flip the script and use ACTING roles to try and bolster your slanderous allegations. why don’t you just say you don’t believe men can be victims of domestic abuse and keep it moving, you demon?

3. what about halsey? she is known to be a tumultuous person with her own mental health struggles. she does not have a good track record of her own like you are seemingly insinuating. and i kindly request that you educate yourself before you speak, or minimally, before you peak your painted clown face into my ask box and exhaust me with your pathetic drivel. evan never liked, retweeted or condoned anything racist. that accidental retweet included. halsey is a troubled and bitter woman who was in love with evan before she ever met him, and was butthurt she was merely a rebound for him and they were not on the same page.

4. no, halsey would not “know him best” and her liking that tweet means jack. if she had her way i’m sure she’d have like 3 kids with evan by now and wouldn’t be liking tweets. she doesn’t actually care, she also loves fucking matty healy lmao as i already said she was butthurt. shocking and groundbreaking: an angry ex likes a defamatory tweet about said ex.

5. frances absolutely didn’t deserve a hate blog, much less the multiple different blogs some losers ran on this app.. but people believing she was using him for clout and money have legitimate reason to argue this because she has professed to being a sugar baby, and intentionally cultivated an unlikeable and problematic online persona. people just took the bait.

and finally.. i’d love for you to name the “problematic behaviors” you take issue with and cite a source other than the voices in your head or wattpad fan fictions you’ve read…. but not here because you’re blocked and you can go to hell ❤️ you may not be an asslicker, but you are a bad person for victim-blaming someone who experienced domestic violence at the hands of someone you’re doing gymnastics to defend. congratulations! now go back to twitter.

[panigamermauser]

So, my clown make-up time. Aka my few theories about plot and companions.

Seems fitting to post it right before I can see if they are right or wrong. Mostly those are just the vibes I got from EA and some Larian vids, no datamine involved. I did not read that.

Long post under the cut.

Also, some things might be obvious for dnd lore nerds (affectionate). But I play only Eberron(the best setting ever, imo) and my DMs homebrew, so idgaf about wider dnd canon.

If I miss something obvious(deities, big name characters etc), that's the reason. I am going to treat BG3 as another homebrew and won't bother looking anything up. Just a PSA.

But back to vibes.

Halsin and Karlach haven't been with us for any meaningful amount of time, so I'll reserve my judgment. From what I saw in EA and panel from Hell - I love them without reservations. I am pretty sure they are meant to be 'good' companions. They will leave evil Tav, maybe even confront/try to kill them, but no backstabbing or bad surprises. Time will tell how wrong I am. So far they seem perfect to me. Just let me hold them!😭😭😭

Shadowheart does not worship Shar by choice. Maybe she's a brainwashed Selune paladin. Maybe she was just raised in a cult. But I have a feeling she only worships Shar because it is all she currently knows. 

For simplicity let's assume she was just raised in a cult. This is probably the first time she is completely outside of her cult group and is free to learn about the world without superiors telling her what she should think about it.

And our actions can help her break out of programming and decide for herself if she even wants to keep following Shar or just be a secular person/swap deities instead. Or she can decide that outside world is just as bad as she was told by cult superiors and double-down on sharran cult.

(Brainwashed selunite prisoner or even selunite agent under the deep cover would be much cooler/angstier, tbh. I'd prefer it. I just do not want to get my hopes up)

Gale gives me major Anders vibes (he even looks similar). So I instantly distrust him. But I am fully aware it might be just Dragon Age brain talking.

I'm giving him a chance and will treat him well and I will feed him magic items I do not want to use, but otherwise he's sus to me, even if he is sweet and fun and likeable. I just keep expecting him to blow something important without telling me (and letting me pick better target🤣).

Really hope it's just Dragon Age trauma, and I will love Gale without reservations on subsequent playthroughs tho.

Wyll gets rewritten, so my EA vibes are irrelevant. Skip. I do hope he's still just as loveable tho. I love EA Wyll.

Lae'zel seems pretty straightforward. Ride or die if you look to get rid of tadpole. Will try to kill you if you embrace its powers. 

We already know she can learn emotional intimacy from us. So I guess we can make her see that there are more ways to live a life than just gith ways, and that those other ways are just as valid. And that she has a choice in what she wants to do with her life. To me she is another case of 'raised in a cult' tbh.

Overall I get a feeling that outside of tadpole decision she's your bestie no matter what you do or who you side with.

Astarion will be the most malleable/multioptional companion.

If you exile/mistreat/ignore him, he'll be recaptured and used for whatever ritual Cazador planed for him. Results might be used against you somehow. Maybe you get a chance to rescue him, but outcome might depend on how much he trusts you.

If you indulge him in assholish behaviour, give him necronomicon, let him eat tadpoles(I'm 100% sure he is the companion who will want to use all the tadpoles, as devs mentioned) and let him drink Cazador's blood to become true vampire - he will become a monster, far worse than Cazador. And he will want Tav for a thrall. And depending on powerful evil items you give him - he might just have enough power to do it, whether you want it or not.

I do not think letting him bite in Act1 it is a bad choice tho(I donate blood twice a year irl, so I cannot see that scene as anything else. What is a vampire if not a person in need of blood transfusion?). But I can totally see that evil!Astarion will use it against you. He had a taste of your blood and he wants more. And on this route he would not stop to think twice about it.

If you treat him well but push against using tadpole powers, do not give him evil book and convince him that being free of Cazador is enough and he does not need to be a true vampire - he'll still be snarky little bitch (affectionate), but no worse that embezzling magistrate/shitty judge he used to be. He will learn to be sincere with Tav, romance or not, in this route.

I hope there's middle ground where you can teach him enough morals where he can become true vampire and not be a monster. And then he can make you his equal true vampire (if you choose so). I guess that's where evil!Astarion gets a chance to deceive you and make you his thrall and slave instead.

Not sure if there's true 'I can fix him' route. Maybe? But I do not really need it, so I did not give it much thought. As long as he stays the perfect little shit he is without becoming a monster - I am happy.

Cannot say anything about Minthara, as tieflings are among my fave races and I - as a player - cannot bring myself to slaughter the whole group. So she is always dead for me. Looking forward to other players capturing her interactions though. I will enjoy her content through all of you💖

Tadpole/Daisy/Guardian. At first I thought it is straight-up tadpole manipulation. But then Larian called them The Guardian, and it got me thinking. So, is it Shadowheart's magic d20 then? Some deity looking to use us as a pawn? I am so intrigued to find out!

I never played previous BG games, so I have no opinion on Jaheira and Minsc. But I think it is not a problem because we have a new protag. So not knowing them from previous games feels very fitting, as my protag won't have to fight against player knowledge. I know of them, and it would make sense if Tav heard stories, but has no personal connection.

And it is not a slight against previous games. I just do not like crpgs as gameplay. I am so deadly bored during turn-based combat.

I get that it seeks to imitate tabletop, but it's like comparing wax fruit to real fruit, imo. I play with friends at the table. I could not care less what ttrpg we are even playing. I'm there for the people, not the system or setting.

I know how lucky I am to have my perfect DM and a great group, and I know that most people do not have this privilege, so I do not begrudge crpg popularity. It's just not what I am looking for in my videogames.

And when it comes to videogames, they are my alone time, and I have very low tolerance for turn-based videogames as a result. I'm 'real time 3rd person view' type of player.

If story reactivity was not this good, I'd be skipping BG3 too. But they got me at 'we have so many choices and consequences!' Just your basic evil/good playthrough is not enough for me. I want every little thing matter, and Larian seems committed to this in BG3. I can tolerate gameplay I don't like for this! Story variations my beloved💖

Probably will godmode my subsequent playthroughs. I do not want to be distracted from good parts by trash mobs. I will experience it as intended on the first go, but after it's auto-crit cheat all the way from second playthrough onward (but I do hope that default easymode will not feel like it wastes my time, so I don't have to).

And seeing how many different routes you can take in EA makes me very excited. It will be worth it💖

[bimbosupreme]

mephistopheles love post

the equivalent of a mental breakdown tangent is all going under a read more

yes believe it or not that freaky ass literally not even human clown in fgo gets love, and love from who? me and like 3 other people

first off

ok and with that out of the way,

i’m not even familiar with their lore. Reason why i stopped caring about the lore behind faust and mephistopheles is that an interlude happens that shows that mephistopheles is just some homunculi made by some mage nobody named faust. and even then the interlude doesn’t talk about the lore behind the novel, its just you helping mephy kill faust

that being said though i would hope the developers expand on their origins more and potentially even release a “true” mephistopheles (a girl can dream)

So, they’re not even the real deal demon known as Mephistopheles in the first place, and i can hear u going “well that’s lame” and like, no, we just need to redirect our feelings from appreciating a demon to appreciating a homunculi who has a weird characterization in the fate universe

Design tangent:

Fgo was actually my first gacha, and so when I came across this servant I kinda instantly fell in love with their design, I love the colors used in their final ascension and overall appearance. The hat that has horns but they're not quite horns, theyre these weird colorful pointy twisty things, the large garish butterfly ornament on their chest (which isnt ugly at all and somehow works so well with their everything on them) is cool, the tights are so cool to look at, i mean look -- a checkered pattern with golden lining on the shorts portion, the tits out look like yes we get it youre insane, the gloves??? purple and also cool, plus theyve got this gradient thing going on? and the fingers have this line going through them, thats so cool. actually the only other servant that comes close to this in terms of “out there” colorful designs is probably final ascension kama and qsh ( i love them both). Also, mephy has this scissor weapon?? thats so cool lol i dont see any other servant wielding giant scissors (for the love of god give mephy an animation update i need to see them use the scissors while doing flips) and they also have this bomb obsession going on? cant relate, but the bombs designs are so so cool i mean its a fucking centipede -- no idea if centipedes are a thing in the original faust but thats something Ill have to look up at some point. ALSO mephy is wearing heels oh my god anytime people wear heels is an automatic win. No clue whats going on with the hair but its kinda cute (dont question me on that) and it has curls and the hair colors are cool i mean its like a lavender thing with darker purple highlights? i love colorful things and i love people with wacky personalities so. Oh my god their tail how could i forget that its so cute and dumb i almost forgot it was there, like what is that even a whip? i dont.. but its got these little purple tips to them that are kinda cute/cool but more cool because tails are fucking up there alongside heels in terms of cool stuff on characters. and of course their fluffly cape -- again no idea what the designers were going for i mean look its a mess of a design i have no fucking idea what any of it means and i hope they explain it someday because that hair and the butterfly and the tail and the hat and the fluffy garb and a bomb obsession?? and this got the go ahead - yeah lets add that to the game like what

ALSO LETS TALK ABOUT THEIR EYES

appreciate these with me for a second

god.

oh and the blue lipstick and face paint god thats a cool design ugh

they can be normal too or at least as normal as possible i mean they even trimmed their eyebrow here lol but you can see the not so well hidden insanity/goofiness peaking through with the inside of the suit at the bottom being highlighter purple and a green shirt with gold accents underneath the black coat at the front <3, fuckin hate that hairstyle tho bro we gotta get that middle part hairstyle outta hereeeee--

TAKE A DETOUR AND LOOK AT THIS LINK THOUGH THIS IS THE MOST NORMAL AND BEST IVE SEEN THEM IN FANART. THE POTENTIAL IS THERE. WE CAN HAVE NICE THINGS AND THEY LOOK GREAT ITS POSSIBLE. I HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE FROM THAT DRAWING.

anyways this is me going off all about why i like their design! but we haven’t even touched the nitty gritty of it all. their personality! what personality you may ask? havent they always been some weirdo laughing a lot and saying dumb shit all the time? well yes and no

Characterization:

True to their dumb little clown design mephy also acts like one.

Some servants bond 1 lines are like “fuck off” and some actually talk to you, nah this bastard mephistopheles’ just laughing. and for the second bond line it seems to imply theyre fuckin with you more (showing up and dissapearing and saying ‘afterimage’) so thats nice that theyre actually making some effort to mess with you in a way? some servants take a long time to actually interact with you so this shows theyre not afraid of interacting with you and thats just at bond 2. and of course the third bond line implies they were probably trying to betray you, its stated in more than 1 place that mephistopheles (actually isnt this a caster class thing?) will betray you or attempt to do so. So the third bond line seems to imply that their attempts have been stopped by you and that’s what they say after some failed attempts. So after stopping this freak from doing some shit their next bond line is actually doing a confession! a jester being honest who couldve seen that one coming but theyre 100% not lying, they really arent a demon but a homunculi made by faust

speaking of faust we’re going to backtrack a little into their interlude that i brought up at the start of this post, its one of those dream interludes and it starts with mephy asking you to help him plant bombs for their eventual reuinion/showdown with faust -- in the meantime faust keeps sending golems in an attempt to kill both you and mephy

When you track faust down, it’s shown that faust was your typical mage, inhumane and uncaring. It’s also pointed out that this faust killed innocents, but this typical mage behavior is boring to mephy, and they say that boring typical behavior is why they wanted to kill them

 so i really cant blame mephistopheles for being the way they are, being raised by this type of guy, even if mephy was always messed up and wacky from the beginning its no reason for faust to attempt to kill him.

Mephistopheles also shows up in salem, cu alter’s interlude, and of course the knk crossover event, and some other things im most likely forgetting but those 3 are ones that i find notable

anytime they show up theyre actually helpful, in salem mephy points out that the nature of the being responsible for the salem epic of remnant is something alien rather than a typical foreign god, mephy also tells you that time is also being sped up and in their weird way they try to cheer you up by spouting some nonsense at the beginning (guda needed some kind of distraction from the grim events that had just transpired at that point in the story), i cant quite remember what mephy did in the knk event but they were a part of your group and were helpful the whole time, actually @/zeravmeta does an amazing analysis of their role in the knk event as well as some extra character analysis here

mephistopheles is kinda cryptic in a weird way though,

like overall i mean theyre a jester homunculi in appearance so yeah its to be expected but come on i love morally gray characters, despite their supposed betrayal hints scattered around here and there

they have this one line that always gets to me

and this line is said with a completely serious face too

the rare serious mephistopheles face! its kinda grim to see that line, no laughs, no nothing, their voice is kinda serious and monotone too. of course this could be just to get you to lower your guard but its still kinda out there that they have this rarely used portrait and that line, so i like to take it as being said to you when youre by yourself and with sincerity

and at least sei (with her wacky outfit and all lol) seems to get along with mephy and thinks theyre nice woohoo

so at the end of the day you have this guy that laughs a lot and gives mixed signals

and they fuck with you

and will most likely try to kill you more than once but hey thats just another tuesday at chaldea

Before I finish last thing I want to point out is this snippet from the fgo source material book which provides more information on servants, and this specific translated bit under mephistopheles

at the core of it all this homunculi....can be your friend! you just need to not go into despair i guess

of course this entire post is an overanalysis into an underwritten character, quarantine + all online college classes have done this to me, i have a douman icon what did you expect

OH...BEFORE I REALLY SIGN OFF AND FINISH THE POST HEY CLOWN LOVERS CHECK OUT THESE FANARTS AND FANARTISTS...

THE FIRST ONE IS HASENDOW YES THE DOUMAN DESIGNER... <3

i cant believe they drew mephy

twice !

and for those of you on twitter check out @cuz_pb and @L0VEYAMA003

[youreallyshouldtalkmore]

Fairy Gala_Part 3

A.N:  A five part Fairy Gala fanfic with my Twst Yuu Oc Mia! So far, Fairy Gala is my favorite event!

Twisted Wonderland Masterlist————————————————————————

Over the next few days, a grueling training began. Vil had given Mia some pointers with her fan that she took to with a sense of glee. She had always thought fans were elegant and was too happy to learn it. Vil also gave some pointers to Ruggie, but his main concern was Leona’s gait and Kalim’s and Jamil’s dance routine.  

As had become Mia’s usual routine, she came everyday even after Vil was done with her, in a show of support. Usually she sat in the corner of the room, drawing and watching. She ate lunch and dinner with them, sometimes helping out in the kitchen. She was also too happy to get away from the sauna that was Ramshackle. 

On more than one occasion, she was glad that she was on Ruggie’s team. Vil had quickly gotten fed up and placed vases on Leona in an effort to help his walk. She really couldn’t tell if Leona was really bad at it or just couldn’t be bothered enough. At least Jamil and Kalim were trying to perfect their dance, but they were having a bit of trouble keeping 100% in sync.  Mia was half surprised that it took until day two for Leona to finally snap. 

“Nope, that’s it!! I’m done!!” Leona growled as the vases fell for the umpteenth time, “It can stay winter for the rest of my life, for all I care. Anything beats all this clowning around.” 

“Leona’s in shabby shape, and Kalim and Jamil’s dancing is all stilted.” Ruggie commented, “Are you guys gonna be ready in time for the Fairy Gala?” 

Grim looked ready to weep, “If you guys don’t steal the show, we’re not gonna be stealing much of anything else.” 

Mia was beginning to get worried as Fairy Gala was mere days from now. Vil already had them working from 7am to 10pm. And it wasn’t any later because Vil believe in a good 7-hour sleep pattern. At least that was a mercy with the training they had. But after two days of full preparation, they didn’t seem like they were reaching that final huddle. 

“If I may ask, why are you making them practice in the clothing they will wear to the gala? Wouldn’t it help if they were in more comfortable clothes?” inquired Mia. 

Vil folded his arms as he answered,  “Muscle memory. They need to do well in these specific clothes, so it makes sense to wear them while they practice. It will help their bodies conform to the clothing and eventually become a second skin.” 

Mia nodded. 

Made sense. 

Then Vil gave that creepy smile and Mia knew something was fixin’ to go down. 

“I will make this Operation Steal the Show a success. My professional pride demands nothing else. As such, there is only one surefire way to succeed: Drilling until your muscle memory couldn’t forget even if it wanted to!” 

Then with a swing of his magic pen, the boys jumped as if they had been kicked. 

Mia’s eyes widen. If she thought it was bad for them now… 

“He gave them a magical kick in the pants!” cried Ruggie. 

Mia’s head spun as she listened to the new rules that Vil laid out.  She unconsciously reached out to Ruggie next to her as she turned away from Vil, “Mommy, I’m scared…” she whimpered. 

“Shishishi…” 

After a brief moment of shock, Leona just glared at Vil, “Who are you to order me to do anything?” 

“Vil Schoenheit! World Class top model, that’s who!” 

Mia didn’t expect Vil to answer seriously, but Leona just gave a yawn in response, “Not. My. Problem. I’ll be seeing you herbivores. I quit. Oh, and Vil, you hit me again, you best be prepared for the consequences.” 

It seems even Vil had to think about it as he raised his magical pen. 

Everyone watched, helpless, as Leona started for the door. Mia’s eyes widen. Of course, Leona would be the hardest to convince to tough it out.

“Wait, Leona!! I know you can do it!” Kalim called out. 

“Don’t care to.” 

Jamil growled, “So you’re giving up? Running away with your tails between your legs?!” 

“As you can clearly see, I’m walking.” 

Vil growled, “None of that will work on Leona! If he decides to quit, unlike most of us, he has no pride to uphold.” 

Mia’s mind raced as Leona reached the door. There had to be something! Something that would get him to…! 

“Ahh, I take it you’ll go and get a nap, first thing you get back, huh?” she asked. 

Everyone turned and stared at her. That was helping how? 

Leona turned the knob and opened the door, “Naturally…” 

“I ask, seriously, but, can you sleep right now? Isn’t it dead winter in Savanaclaw?”

“Such things as blankets.” 

Mia knocked her head against her hand, “Of course silly me, but if it gets much worse, won’t it get colder? I know you are beastman, a lion, but can you hibernate like a bear?” 

Leona turned, leaning on the open door as he looked back at Mia.  “Is there a point, somewhere?” 

“I’m just concerned about how well, you are going to nap. I mean it’s winter, might get worse. Sure you have blankets but will that really work? And what about the other students in your dorm?” 

“Not my…” 

Mia cut in suddenly, “But if they get cold, won’t they complain? And you’re the dorm leader, so wouldn’t that mean eventually they’ll be waking you up all hours of the day and night because of it?” 

Everyone’s saw Leona twitched once as Mia spoke calmly, “So as dorm leader, you need to deal with the freezing weather and eventually finding enough blankets for not only yourself but your entire dorm. But even if you found enough blankets, would that stop your dorm from complaining? Eventually they’ll be hounding you to make Savanaclaw livable again. They are really fond of warm weather, and most beastmen need it to literally function.” 

Mia reached up to hold her chin, “But I guess you could escape it. I know you are fond of the botanical garden, which is a problem for two reasons.” 

Ruggie couldn’t help the grin as he asked, “What reasons are that, Mia?” His eyes darted to Leona who miraculously hadn’t left yet. 

“Well, right now it is Fairy Gala, he can’t use it anyway. And even after Fairy Gala is over, isn’t the weather there tumultuous? The magestone or the fairies, not sure which, are regulating the garden right now, but chances are, it’s going to get cold. Which is why, Leona I asked, will your naps be okay?” 

Mia said it so earnestly with a straight face as she looked across to Leona who was really twitching now.  Jamil elbowed Kalim who wanted to start laughing; he accidentally let out a snort as it was. 

Ruggie crossed his arms behind his head, “Mia, does have a point. There will come a riot in our dorm if this goes on any longer. I’m already trying to manage everyone’s complaints. Reason why, you haven’t heard too many yet.” 

Vil eyed Leona, “So, what are you gonna do? Quickly make up your mind, so we can plan accordingly.” 

Leona let the door slam before marching back to the others with a growl.  The tension in the room eased as Kalim looked wide-eyed as Mia. How did she manage to do that? Jamil smirked, silently impressed. Leona glared at Mia who only clasped her hands behind her back with a smile. 

“Leona, if nothing else, those fairies will have the fortune and privilege of meeting you. Give them a show they can’t even dream about!” She ended with a dramatic snap of her fingers. 

Leona sighed, “Why do you think that saying such things to me, works? You rehashed that line often!” 

Mia’s voice was sweet and honest, “But is it any less true? I know you can do it and do it exceptionally well!!” 

Leona just sighed before Vil promptly put them back to work. Mia, Ruggie and Grim exited the ballroom. 

Grim cried, “My life just flashed before my eyes!” 

“Your life? What about my sinus’?” Mia almost cried. 

“Shishishi, I thought we were done for!” Ruggie elbowed her, “How you managed that? Mia, you just saved Fairy Gala!” 

Mia rolled her eyes, “Don’t be so dramatic, Ruggie!!” 

Part 4

[blossom-hwa]

volleyball players!golcha + a supernatural twist

so casey (@thepixelelf) came up with this brilliant idea (original blurbs here - read them they’re so fun + will help you understand what’s going on in this post) but essentially this is golcha as a volleyball team EXCEPT they all have superpowers

and no this isn’t some saving the world type shit everyone at the school just happens to have some superpower so they’re just trying to navigate the hell that is high school while dealing with powers so CHAOS

anyway please enjoy these brief blurbs and reblog if you did, and again do not forget to check out the original post here because why not it’s FUN

pairing: golden child x gender neutral!reader

wc: 11.7k (total)

genre: fluff, a bit of angst in some parts, volleyball!au, superpowers!au

triggers: cursing

Volleyball!au Masterlist (casey + lina) | Golden Child Masterlist

daeyeol - golden tongue

daeyeol has a golden tongue which basically means he can be very, very persuasive with his spoken words when he wants to

like casey said it comes in handy when he’s arguing with the basketball team for gym time but in 99% of other situations daeyeol tends to... be very awkward and stilted in a way that isn’t characteristic of those with a golden tongue

the boys sometimes tease him about it because a tongue-tied golden tongue? that’s not supposed to exist

but he’s just afraid of accidentally manipulating people even though he really does have a pretty good grasp on his power :/ like sungyoon will try to remind him that but daeyeol’s still wary

on the court though he literally just exudes confidence. like daeyeol is GOOD at volleyball and he knows it

even if his teammates clown him they listen to him when he’s running drills/coaching because daeyeol knows his shit. he’s been playing volleyball for years at this point AND has an older brother who played as well he knows what he’s doing

he’s been playing the longest of all of golcha and it shows in games! he’s one of the best players if not the best

really the other boys do look up to him even if they show it in a roundabout way

(daeyeol complains about the lack of respect all the time but tbh he doesn’t really help his case when he’s soft for every single one of the boys)

side note: he has a bit of a special bond with bomin :) as in bomin clowns the everloving fuck out of him but he also always goes to daeyeol if he’s not feeling good and daeyeol is always there to listen it’s super sweet

(more on that in bomin’s part :D)

does interviews with the school newspaper after games and he’s just so different from normal because volleyball is one of the things besides academics and stuff that he’s confident in

as a side note he got voted most boyfriend material in one of the school newspaper polls because he looks perfect and is the sweetest (have you seen how he gets so soft with the boys in every video online? don’t argue with me) and it made its way into the yearbook

older brother and alumnus sungyeol clowns him every other day for it

daeyeol gets revenge by reenacting sungyeol’s worst volleyball fails and sending them to his friends

has a whole folder on his phone of reenactments at this point

anyway like i said daeyeol is a little awkward in everyday situations so enter you: confrontational + rash with a sharper tongue than is probably necessary and an affinity for changing temperatures

well. more like you can ratchet the temperature up at will. bringing it down is much harder

it’s useful when it’s winter and everyone’s freezing but the temperature also likes to creep higher when you get pissed off which is sometimes not nice when it’s like negative degrees outside and inside it’s like 100

the only way to cool the room when the second thing happens is to calm you the fuck down! or turn on the air conditioner

and the first is easier said than done

it’s not like it’s only unpleasant for other people though bc you’re not immune to the heat and also because you’re the one like. producing the heat?? your skin gets boiling hot to the touch if you’re upset enough and several times people have gotten fucking burns by touching your arm to try and calm you down

usually it’s fine bc you have a good grasp on your power when you’re calm but if someone says something offensive/stupid.... god help them

anyway even though daeyeol doesn’t like to use his power much he’s still one of the people that others go to when situations need defusing because they (mostly) respect him as an older and more mature person (i say mostly because the amount of disrespect he gets from his volleyball team on the daily... yeah let’s just trend #prayfordaeyeol)

and that’s how you meet! you’re yelling at someone for saying something fucking stupid and daeyeol walks in right when you’re threatening to hit said person if they don't shut up rn

daeyeol manages to calm the situation but not before everyone stupid enough to still be in the room is sweating buckets including him

this just... continues

like daeyeol becomes the go to for situations involving you specifically bc you respond better to him for some reason 

and you get to know each other just from daeyeol walking in on you threatening to throw someone out of the window and saying no! nope :) no you’re not throwing anyone out of any window :) come on y/n let’s go :) while subtly dragging you out of the room

the thing is he listens to you. he actually listens to why you got pissed instead of just telling you to control your anger. like he does emphasize the fact that you need to control yourself because what if this happens around people without powers? but he listens and that helps more than anything really and you actually start getting better at controlling yourself 

and somewhere along the way things just click between you two and you become friends. you like him bc he’s v kind if awkward and he’s the only person who’s never tried to calm you using golden tongue manipulation and he likes you bc you’re so outspoken and bold

then one day you get genuinely so upset about something someone said and daeyeol doesn’t care about your blistering hot skin he doesn’t care if you’re raising the temperature in the room he doesn’t even care if he gets burnt he just kisses you on the forehead softly and holds you close even as you’re overheating

which just drains the fight out of you and you kind of collapse on him and stay like that for a while

he then takes you out for cold drinks (because you’re still overheating a little) and kisses you over an iced americano and boom relationship

the other boys find you very fun to be around and marvel over your relationship bc you’re confident and loud meanwhile daeyeol is a bumbling mess when he isn’t using his power or he isn’t on the court

but it works ok it just does. don’t question it

(jangjun does once and even with his super strength he ended up lying on the court bc the element of surprise is the only thing that can really get him)

(and lucky for you you know exactly how to take advantage of that <3)

(daeyeol just thinks it’s hot + impressive and kisses you right after)

(bomin + 99 line gag but you threaten to give them the same treatment and they shut up)

sungyoon - telekinesis

so as casey said sungyoon comes from a long line of telekinetics except he’s not entirely sure why he’s even at this school because... he has never shown any manifestations of this power

not to his knowledge at least

i say this bc people have seen stuff twitch when sungyoon’s around, he just never notices and thus concludes that either people are fucking around with him and it never happened or it was just a coincidence

anyway he doesn’t really care much, like sure he sometimes gets insecure/unsure of himself in a school full of kids with superpowers

but like i said this school is just a safe haven for those born with powers, they’re not training or anything they just learn to control what they have

and since sungyoon doesn’t have much to control he’s doing fine as far as everyone is really concerned

it’s also kind of nice being the only normal one on the volleyball team like everyone else has wack-ass powers that fuck shit up but sungyoon is like the calm in the middle of the storm like hi yes i am also part of this team of idiots but at least i don’t break equipment or injure people inadvertently

for this reason some people think sungyoon is the only sane person on the team 

they are wrong

sungyoon can and will go batshit insane at the first opportunity

he is also a massive tease and if anyone asks him to do anything he’ll make it a back and forth for like 5 minutes before deciding whether or not to actually do it

bomin: sungyoon can you help me get the mats

sungyoon: why

bomin: p l e a s e

repeat for at least five minutes and you now have a regular day to day conversation with sungyoon

but sungyoon really is passionate about volleyball okay, like he loves the sport so much

he used to get worked up about it so much that he’d over-practice and actually play worse :/

got over that with joochan/daeyeol’s help (he and daeyeol weren’t on good terms for a week or two though) and now they’re one happy dysfunctional family :)

if you bring up that time in sungyoon’s life you will be subjected to his death glare so maybe just... don’t

like even jangjun doesn’t talk about it and that’s saying something

anyway moving on 

in terms of powers you’re the opposite of sungyoon. aka you have wack-ass telekinesis and you have no idea how to control it

which?? somehow sungyoon comes in handy with this

because despite not really having powers himself, he watched his sister learn to control her abilities and also listened in on his parents’ advice to her because most of the time controlling powers really just amounts to controlling emotions

aka why sungyoon is (for the most part) so calm and mature

when he’s not purposely being a little shit to golcha of course

but you and sungyoon are kinda... at a loss bc it’s not like you go absolutely off the walls batshit insane?? like you’re a relatively calm person and even though the powers do manifest when you’re feeling a strong emotional upsurge

other than that they’re just... seemingly random???

regardless of that sungyoon makes you start on breathing exercises n shit and you would honestly probably complain if you weren’t sick of your powers manifesting every five fucking seconds. like at this point you’ll try anything

cue long sessions after school in the gym of sungyoon practicing spikes while you sit in the corner controlling your breath to the beat of balls bouncing on the floor

sometimes a few of the other team members join in but more often than not it’s just you and sungyoon

as time passes, in between cleaning scuff marks off the floor and picking up balls that just have flown everywhere, you and sungyoon get closer

and somehow... you don’t know exactly what happened but your powers aren’t so out of wack anymore

sungyoon can’t completely explain it either but like? neither of you is going to complain

you kind of think it might have something to do with how sungyoon is just a calming presence. like when you talk with him and stuff you’re less likely to inadvertently make something move or whatever

it’s not just with sungyoon too - it kind of seems like if you’re focusing intently on something, then the mini episodes don’t happen

sungyoon hypothesizes you might be a little like youngtaek as in you need something to concentrate on because if you zone out shit happens

you maybe zone out less than he does but maybe it’s a more subtle thing with you than with him who knows

anyway

one day you two go to get coffee after leaving the gym together and sungyoon looks weirdly nervous and you ask if something’s up while praying you don’t send all the sugar packets flying everywhere 

and then when you leave with your coffee he asks you out

like really. he asks you out. you can’t believe it

so the lid flies off your coffee cup and liquid splashes everywhere

now you have burns all over your hands from hot coffee and sungyoon is freaking the fuck out and luckily donghyun was just leaving school so he gets called over to take care of your burns

anyway after that sungyoon is still a flustered mess and you’re trying to tell him you’re fine, look all the redness is gone and also yeah sorry about that i’d love to go on a date with you

CUE SUNGYOON’S COFFEE CUP FLYING OUT OF HIS HANDS AND SPLATTERING ALL OVER THE GROUND

you swear it wasn’t you and sungyoon KNOWS he didn’t just drop it so the only conclusion left is that sungyoon did it

oh my god he actually has telekinesis!

(the rest of golcha: yeah let’s just pretend we HAVEN’T been saying this for literal years)

anyway let’s just say that between sungyoon confessing + figuring out he actually has telekinesis powers it was a very eventful day

golcha loves you but is also wary of whenever you’re around bc sungyoon tends to get v nervous and maybe the net starts lifting out of the ground if you surprise him with a kiss

but it’s fine! you’ve learned all of the techniques sungyoon taught you, now it’s just time for him to get a taste of that too :)

and sungyoon would probably bitch and moan if it was with any other person but it’s more time to spend with you so is he really gonna complain? 

no <3

jangjun - super strength

ah yes. resident ‘i’m doing my best to control my powers but sometimes i get too excited and whoops now there’s a hole in the gym floor’

once again credits to casey for that idea (she actually wrote a drabble for it which you can find here)

he’s gotten better at controlling his powers but uh sometimes excitement gets the better of him all right

look he’s trying!! ok!! he really is

especially when it comes to volleyball - he’s really serious, does his absolute best not to cause any damage to the gym because one time he cracked the wood floors and let’s just say admin was not happy

worst day of jangjun’s life trying to explain that shit to the principal

so yeah he’s doing a lot better now with controlling his power

but at the same time let’s not ignore half the reason why there are far fewer accidents than before - you

you and jangjun meet like halfway through your first year of school during gym class when jangjun hits a ball a little (a lot) too hard and it ends up knocking you the fuck out

a healed concussion + a million apologies later, you and jangjun are laughing your heads off in the clinic with the nurse screwing her eyes up in confusion like?? this boy just smashed a volleyball into your head and now you’re laughing with him wtf

but jangjun’s so funny and friendly that it’s hard not to become his friend so after that you two are essentially inseparable

so when jangjun decides to play for the volleyball team you sign up to be team manager

(you also help him practice and do you best to keep his power in check)

which works out! because you’re responsible and organized but most importantly you have power over air

and given enough warning (which, as you gain more experience, doesn’t have to be a lot), you can manipulate the air to stop some of jangjun’s more aggressive serves from hitting the ground too fast and causing major damage to the newly-renovated floors

daeyeol + the coach thank every higher being for your existence at each practice

youngtaek + joochan started a cult in your name after you saved both of them from one of jangjun’s spikes hitting them in the head

yeah let’s just say golcha is v thankful jangjun gave you that concussion back in first year

ANYWAY

one day you’re picking up some volleyballs that are lying around while the boys play a practice match in the middle of the gym

and because your back is to the fucking court. you don’t get any warning except a few sharp screams before a ball just motherfucking smashes against the back of your head and knocks you the fuck out for the second time in your life

you come to on the ground with donghyun passing his hands over your throbbing head

and the first thing you do when the pain is gone is look up and ask where jangjun is

half the team has disappeared from the gym but donghyun tells you he had a major mental breakdown when he saw you unconscious on the floor and just ran out. the others are already trying to find him but you don’t care you just run out to try and find wherever the fuck your best friend is

you find him crouched in the corner of a stairwell with his head in his hands and you’re like jangjun what’s wrong oh my god are you okay?

and he just looks up like oh my god you’re okay. you’re okay right?

you nod like yeah?? donghyun worked his magic of course i’m fine now but what’s up with you? were you crying?

he just clams up then which obviously confirms your suspicions and you’re like dude... why were you crying. i’m really fine

and then he explodes like - i fucking hate my power sometimes i hate that i can’t control it i hate that i accidentally break people or hurt people when i don’t mean to and it’s even worse when it’s people I care about like fuck y/n why can’t i just have a power that doesn’t cause all this stupid shit - 

so you just lash out with a gust of wind and shake the railing on the stairwell

jangjun’s like why did you do that

and you say every power has a destructive side. i can hurt people on accident. if i got really riled up i could slam someone against a wall and knock them out the same way you did with me. it’s happened before

jangjun flinches but you just step closer like jangjun. you’re doing fine. your power is cool as fuck. i admire the control you have over it and no don’t argue, i’ve watched you over the past few years and do you know how much you’ve improved?

it ends up with you hugging jangjun and despite all his muscle he just collapses like a rag doll in your arms and on impulse you kiss his forehead like it’s ok, i’m fine, you’re fine. we’re all fine

and that little impulse kiss changes everything. even though neither of you really says anything explicit at first, something shifts between you and even though jangjun was touchy before, now you hold hands between classes and hug before practice and golcha is just like... /eyes emoji/

jangjun brings it up one weekend when you two are trying (key word: trying) to study and you just kind of shrug and ask what do you really want to be? labels or nah? bc honestly you’re happy as long as he’s around

which makes jangjun’s heart flutter and maybe the pen in his hand explodes all over his notes (not like they were legible anyway, you just promise to lend him yours) and voila! you’re dating

it’s super cute but also super loud

like jangjun will yell across the court like HEY WATCH ME ROLL AROUND ON THIS VOLLEYBALL Y/N (or whatever the fuck he was doing in the breathe mv behind) and you yell back like FUCK IT U P JANGJUN!!! 

coach maybe praises your existence a little less now but daeyeol just reminds him that you’ve saved every member on this team + him at least once by now and the cult revives

as your bf jangjun strong-arms (literally) youngtaek/joochan out of the way as the head of the cult now

you two are very supportive and very loud in your support

you’re essentially each other’s professional hype-people and like to celebrate with kisses while everyone else gags

it’s disgustingly cute

someone always yells something about pda and then jangjun just kisses you harder

cue the boys screaming and you laughing and an unamused (he’s amused he’s just trying not to show it) daeyeol

coach is the only one who’s really unamused but at some point he just gives up because jangstar does what he wants as long as you’re fine with it

/shrugging emoji/

youngtaek - pyrokinesis

youngtaek has power over fire but it’s not really so much that he can control fire and more like he just... zones out and oops his notes are burning

it’s usually best to keep him and daeyeol’s s/o in separate rooms because fire + ratcheting up the temperature does not equal a good time

like casey said when he’s focused it’s all cool and he has a decent measure of control over his power but when his eyes go dazed and he’s staring into the distance then you better pray the room has a bucket of water or a fire extinguisher nearby

it isn’t usually a problem because this is a school for kids with powers and youngtaek isn’t the only pyrokinetic here but it is a hassle when sometimes youngtaek zones out on the court and hits the ball and suddenly jangjun’s screaming because he got hit by a volleyball on fire and now his uniform is on fire and everything is on fire

oops

but anyway with anything that isn’t a) volleyball or b) music youngtaek has less than half the attention span of a goldfish which means he may or may not be lagging behind in several classes

and it isn’t enough for him to be in danger of failing just yet but his teachers are like youngtaek i think you might need a tutor if you want to do more than just pass the final

he also needs better grades if he wants to keep playing volleyball so he decides to find a tutor

so he asks daeyeol about it bc despite his dyslexia daeyeol is a pretty good student but he’s busy as an upperclassman and all so he refers youngtaek to you!

you have the power to memorize anything you put your mind to. like if you really wanted to you could memorize an entire map of the city or its skyline but you just don't care enough to do that

only things you care about are school + your hobbies + your friends/family

anyway you meet up with youngtaek and from the start it’s kind of a mess because he zones out in the middle of you teaching him math and somehow sets the table on fire

after that you make sure to keep a bottle of water nearby (it comes in handy several times)

but despite the slightly disastrous first meeting you take a liking to youngtaek because beyond everything he’s genuine and honest and just a really good person regardless of the fact that he’s a little fire-happy

so tutoring sessions start ending with walking each other to the bus stop or getting a drink together or whatever and it’s really nice and sweet, youngtaek’s happy to be doing better in his classes bc you’re so patient and a really good teacher 

and one day he blurts out that when he heard about your power he wasn’t sure you’d be a good teacher because everything seems to come easily to you

then he covers his mouth because holy hell he wasn’t supposed to say that youngtaek come ON

you calmly put out the little fire on the side of the desk before telling him it’s fine, you get that a lot but really being able to memorize things isn’t as helpful as people seem to think

like sure you can memorize the fact that 2+2=4 but if you don’t understand addition as a concept then you won’t be able to do 5+5=10 or something like that

and you can’t exactly just memorize concepts. so with memorization comes a lot of hard work in trying to understand it all

and from this little conversation youngtaek comes out with so much more respect for you?? like god damn he now sees just how hard you work for everything you care about and youngtaek likes that. he likes it a lot

so yeah both of you have budding feelings at this point but because i'm the author i get to say you’re idiots in love so you don’t say shit

until after finals you and youngtaek go to a party daeyeol’s hosting and you both get tipsy-drunk-ish and by the end of the night youngtaek’s face is buried in your shoulder and before he passes out fully he mumbles that he likes you so much it doesn’t make sense

and you’re drunk too so all you do is kiss his forehead and fall asleep

unluckily for you a mostly sober kim donghyun got a video of all that so when you both wake up a couple hours later it’s to several still-awake members of the volleyball team + your friends all up in your faces like oh my god they’re in LOVE

youngtaek wakes up with all the noise and just blinks sleepily and you kinda pat his head and tell him to go back to sleep while giving everyone else death glares like SHUT THE FUCK UP SO HE CAN SLEEP

but you don’t know about the video >:)

so one of the sober boys ends up bringing you two home and when you wake up the next morning donghyun has added you both to a group chat and sent the video there

you scream into your pillow

youngtaek screams into his pillow

and you both proceed to do absolutely nothing about it until joochan locks the two of you in one of the music rooms and slides a copy of the song youngtaek wrote about you under the door 

you get to the paper before youngtaek can burn it and it’s messy it’s awkward it’s hilarious but you two end up together by the end of the day so it worked... kinda?

your presence helps youngtaek a lot by giving him something more to focus on throughout the day and subsequently not set everything on fire

though mind reader bomin complains because he used to zero in on youngtaek’s mind when things got too much since quote unquote ‘there’s not much going on up there’ (credits to casey + fact in star) but now if youngtaek’s brain isn’t playing the music from the mii channel it’s thinking about you which isn’t ideal

youngtaek may or may not have attacked bomin after that

you may or may not have had to pull him away when bomin’s shirt started smoking

but it’s cool the smoking goes away when you kiss his forehead and youngtaek just beams like the entire sun

seungmin - foresight

like casey said seungmin has foresight and it’s anything but useful

he’ll either get glimpses of dumb unimportant shit like haha the day’s lunch includes rice or visions of stuff he can’t avoid like hey youngtaek’s going to trip on air oh oops he just did aaand now his shirt is on fire

honestly if he was going to have foresight he could at least like?? predict stocks or some shit?? why the fuck does it MATTER if youngtaek’s about to fall if seungmin can’t even help him

not like he’d help even if he could because seungmin isn’t an angel and youngtaek falling is funny but still it’s the principle of the goddamn matter

sometimes he gets glimpses of whether or not golcha will win their volleyball matches but like casey said he doesn’t say anything because he doesn’t want to ruin the team spirit before the game’s even over

plus who said the future was fixed in stone? like none of seungmin’s momentary glimpses have been wrong yet but there’s always a chance... right?

seungmin isn’t going to discount that possibility yet at least

but he didn’t always think that way - you’re actually the one who opened him up to that point of view

you’re an ordinary person with no powers or anything but you work part-time at the juice bar across the street from his school and sometimes golcha will go there after practice to get something to drink

and you have a special soft spot for seungmin because he’s the first of the group who started frequenting the shop

and on that first ever visit he helped catch you when you slipped bringing a tray of drinks to a few people sitting in the corner

even though you both ended up on the floor covered in juice he still managed to break your fall enough that none of the glasses broke and while giving him his drink you kind of joked that it was like he knew what was going to happen before it did

which... is not exactly false

seungmin was waiting for his drink when he got a little glimpse of you falling and him helping catch you but then it all happened before he could even process the vision so like yeah he did see it but not soon enough to prevent anything

like usual

anyway you promise seungmin a free drink the next time he comes in when you’re on shift and so he does come in though he insists you don’t have to give him his drink for free

you just say well buy me a drink then. two for one

(listen he’s cute and he broke your fall and he seems polite. who’s gonna sue you for being a little flirty)

and so a beautiful relationship is born :)

seungmin really likes you a lot like so much?? he used to laugh at youngtaek for being so whipped for his partner but now he thinks he kind of understands it

the one thing to worry about is the fact that you don’t have powers and he does but it’s not that big of an issue really. like foresight is one of the abilities that doesn’t really manifest itself physically beyond maybe having a bit of reaction time? but considering his foresight is literally useless even that’s debatable

well actually there’s another thing to worry about: the boys finding out he has an s/o and teasing him to high hell

which they do while also demanding free drinks as seungmin’s friends

on days when you’re feeling nice you’ll do it but money always appears in the tip jar that pays for the free drinks

(it’s daeyeol. he feels bad)

anyway you don’t know about the foresight/powers thing until daeyeol calls you one night to pick seungmin up from a party one night and on the way home he stops you from almost getting run into by a speeding car

WHILE TIPSY/DRUNK

once you’ve recovered you ask him how he reacted so fast and he just kind of tipsily smiles and says ‘i saw it was going to happen’

you don’t ask him anything then because he’s drunk and sleepy so you just drive him home but the entire time you’re thinking about all the little things that have just... seemed questionable during the time you’ve known seungmin

and it’s weird as fuck but at the same time you can’t figure out any other explanation? because once is normal, twice could be a coincidence, but upwards of ten incidents is not right

it feels like you’re bella confronting edward about being a stupid vampire (no i never read twilight and i'm not sorry about it) but a couple of weeks later you ask him

he doesn’t actually remember the drive back home that night because he was kind of too wasted but he definitely does remember the other incidents including when you two met skdjghs

he spills after a few minutes of awkward silence and begs you not to tell which of course you promise to because why the fuck would you not? if the truth got leaked that would be disastrous and it’s not like you’re scared or anything, seungmin’s (mostly) harmless even if some of the other abilities like youngtaek + fire or jangjun + strength give you pause

but you get to talking about his power of foresight and seungmin kind of shrugs at one point while saying that he doesn’t know why he gets glimpses, it’s all inevitable anyway so what’s the point

and you just say maybe it isn’t that way. maybe he’s seeing one future possibility, maybe even the most likely one, but that doesn’t mean it’s the only one set in stone right?

seungmin loves you a lot for that. like so much. it’s a new perspective and it gives him more hope than he used to have and you just KNOW the conversation ends in kisses and cuddles

because while he’s not going to actively try and prevent what’s about to happen if it’s bad (like he can’t exactly influence the outcome of a volleyball match beyond just doing his best - plus, his foresight doesn’t give him enough time to really react to most things), it gives him some hope that even if his foresight says something will turn out bad, there’s a chance it might turn out well :)

anyway seungmin pocket boy you two fit right into each other when you hug which results in the other boys cooing but seungmin’s strong even if he’s small so they get a few new bruises that donghyun just refuses to heal

we love evil donghyun

you also go to their volleyball matches and seungmin trusts you enough to tell you what glimpses he got of the game but you always remind him the future may not be set in stone and regardless of what he sees you always cheer him on just as loudly

all the boys come piling into the juice bar after games and you smile and give seungmin a free drink while everyone else has to pay

they decry favoritism but you just shrug and kiss seungmin over the counter while they scream

dramatic assholes

jaehyun - gravity manipulation

so like casey said jaehyun can manipulate the gravity of objects, either send them floating up in the air or slamming down on the round

which sucks if the object in question is a volleyball and it comes pounding down on his toes when he isn’t paying attention

this happened at the first ever volleyball practice he attended and the boys (read: jibeom) have yet to let it fucking go

his husky voice doesn’t help because when he complains jibeom the boys just imitate his voice which derails the entire practice and now coach + daeyeol + team manager who’s jangjun’s s/o are all lying facedown on the ground like when will this madness end

never. the answer is never

but it’s ok jaehyun gets his revenge when they’re all practicing and he sends jibeom’s ball flying up into the air and refuses to let it come down and when he does the ball drops right on jibeom’s head and whoops look who’s got a concussion hey donghyun can you fix this

jaehyun is also one of the few occasional lifesavers (literally) besides team manager + donghyun because given enough warning, he can manipulate the gravity on one of jangjun’s maybe too strong serves and make it come down more softly than it would’ve otherwise

the problem is he isn’t super adept with his power

more experienced students will be able to manipulate gravity very subtly, but jaehyun more or less has three settings - floating, slamming down, and very occasionally something in between

which isn’t exactly ideal but jaehyun’s working on it, it’s fine, he’s not too pressed about it

anyway you’re a student at the school for students with superpowers in the next city over and you play basketball

you don’t know jaehyun but he sure as hell knows you because even though he stopped playing basketball a few years ago to focus on volleyball, he still loves the sport and he happens to think you’re one of the best players he’s ever see

also you’re really cute

jaehyun goes to every single basketball game that’s against your school just to watch you play 

he doesn’t really do much other than watch because a) he’s so focused on your performance that he doesn’t register much else and b) everyone would clown him for cheering your team on skdjgskjg

also jaehyun’s just shy. like really shy you couldn’t catch him approaching you/showing interest towards you unless someone forced it out of him

which is what his lovely friends from 99 line decide to do

they obviously know about his crush like joochan was with him the first time jaehyun went to watch a basketball game against your school so he SAW the heart eyes

he took a picture and sent it to jibeom who sent it to donghyun and now it’s the profile picture for their group chat dedicated to making sure jaehyun asks you out

jaehyun has no knowledge of this group chat because he’s oblivious

anyway one day after a game they’re in the parking lot bc jaehyun’s driving this time and jaehyun is babbling about oh my god y/n was so great this time they’re literally so good at basketball holy shit?? and while he’s talking he doesn’t notice jibeom/joochan/donghyun like. subtly pushing him closer and closer to your team who’s just waiting around the bus you’ll take to get back to your school

and only when you look up does jaehyun realize he’s now close enough for you to have heard literally everything he just said in the past minute or so 

cue the awkward crow noises as you and jaehyun just stare at each other

suddenly the backpack in jaehyun’s hand just drops onto his foot and if it weren’t for the steel-toed sneakers he’s gotten in the habit of wearing then he’d probably have a broken foot

as such he kind of lets out a quiet dying screech (it HURTS) and now jibeom/donghyun/joochan are dying like three feet away meanwhile your friends are screaming into their hands like Y/N IT’S A CUTE BOY YOU LIKE CUTE BOYS TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY YOU IDIOT

and when nothing happens for five seconds beyond jaehyun’s ears turning tomato red joochan steps forward and is like hello my friend here is whipped for you so if you’re comfortable would you please give him your number because he’s been dying for it since like. last year when we saw you play for the first time

jaehyun nearly launches himself at joochan like SHUT UP DUDE but then you’re handing over your phone while looking away because fuck jaehyun’s really cute and you wouldn’t mind getting to know him okay??

(who wouldn’t though that’s the real question)

anyway the two cities aren’t too big so it’s not that hard for you and jaehyun to meet up for coffee at some point (which jaehyun surprisingly gets the courage to initiate - he reasons it as he’s the one who was interested first so he kind of has to be the one to do it but that doesn’t mean he’s screaming throughout the entire text conversation) and after a semi-awkward first interaction you two surprisingly hit it off and after a few weeks you’re dating

you’re the ultimate athletic couple like jaehyun does volleyball and you do basketball and sometimes you play each other in the park or jaehyun starts teaching you how to play volleyball and it’s really cute

over the summer your friend group + golcha goes to the beach to hang out and jaehyun sees firsthand how much you’ve improved at volleyball 

i didn’t mention it earlier but your power is water manipulation which not only comes in handy with putting out youngtaek’s inadvertent flames but also is very useful in splashing your friends + golcha all at once at the beach when no one else is looking

of course everyone just piles on you and sends you flailing into the ocean and maybe you choke on seawater because you’re laughing so hard but jaehyun pulls you out and your first kiss tastes like salty ocean and even with the rest of your friends + golcha screaming it’s perfect 

water manipulation also helps when they dump you both into the ocean and you just kinda make a bubble where it’s deep enough and kiss jaehyun there (yeah pjo the last olympian vibes deal with it)

daeyeol gets worried when you don’t come up and then you surface a second later in his face and he screams it’s glorious

you use your power to strip away your sweat after basketball practice and jaehyun begs you to do it for him too after volleyball practice when you’re there which of course you do because you’re a nice s/o

when he gets a little better at the subtleties of his power jaehyun likes to lift you up using his gravity manipulation and spin you around it’s really cute

you show up to jaehyun’s volleyball games against your school to cheer him on despite the fact that one of your friends is on your school’s volleyball team skdjgshkd (and maybe jaehyun accidentally drops the volleyball HARD on his foot the first time you scream his name)

jaehyun starts doing the same when it comes to your basketball games he is no longer shy about screaming your name from his school’s side of the bleachers :)

his friends call him a traitor but jaehyun doesn’t really care because he’s the one who gets to kiss you after your games so who’s the real winner here?

him obviously

jibeom - invisibility

casey i think this blurb was my favorite, it’s so fucking funny and literally so jibeom

so like casey said jibeom can turn invisible which is really fun for him and a nightmare for everyone else because he’ll just sneak up on people and be like BOO

if you have a weak heart you better stay vigilant

but there are also issues because like casey came up with sometimes jibeom accidentally turns invisible during a fucking game and gets confused as to why no one’s serving to him until one of his teammates or the coach on the sidelines notices he’s gone and is like JIBEOM YOU’RE FUCKING INVISIBLE

it’s fine the school only ever plays sports against other supernatural schools to avoid spreading the secret about superpowers to regular humans so people are used to this kind of shit but it’s embarrassing for jibeom skdjgshjg

he’ll try to put his ability to his advantage by turning invisible when he’s supposed to be running laps/doing drills and hoping daeyeol/coach/team manager don’t notice

at this point though they always do and then it’s another five laps/set of drills for him

big sad

anyway jibeom’s just living his invisible life you know being a little shit with everyone

mocking jaehyun’s voice and turning invisible when jaehyun tries to swipe at him

sneaking up behind his friends and scaring them even if it means he gets decked in the face (that’s one thing he won’t repeat with jangjun. like the dude doesn’t get scared easily but if he gets startled... the super strength is not a blessing for jibeom if he doesn’t move fast enough)

and then you transfer to the school

so you used to go to the school jaehyun’s parter goes to but your family moved or smth so now you’re here and jaehyun’s the only person you even vaguely know so you kinda stick around and become friends

and of course jaehyun introduces you to the rest of golcha

now jibeom is in the gym. invisible okay. waiting for jaehyun to show up so he can do his daily scare-jaehyun-because-i’m-a-little-shit routine

then you walk into the gym with jaehyun and the first thing you fucking say is there are thirteen people in this room (10 golcha members + you + team manager + coach) but i only see twelve so who’s the invisible one walking up right behind jaehyun

jaehyun fucking screams, a whole crate of volleyballs goes tumbling to the floor because gravity manipulation + jaehyun getting scared go hand in hand, everything is in chaos, youngtaek+joochan+jangjun are crying of laughter at jaehyun’s reaction, and jibeom is now standing visible behind jaehyun wide-eyed and surprised because how the fuck did you know

turns out your power is being able to sense/locate invisible things including invisible jibeoms so the rest of golcha + manager + coach think you’re a lifesaver because finally someone can find jibeom whenever he disappears

wrong

like yeah if jibeom has disappeared in the middle of practice you’ll yell and be like KIM JIBEOM GET YOUR ASS OUT AND PRACTICE YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHIT 

is it a surprise that you and daeyeol’s partner hit it off in less than five seconds

but if jibeom’s disappearing just to be a little shit you’ll purposely point people in the wrong direction like you’ll reassure youngtaek that oh no jibeom’s over there trying to scare seungmin and then jibeom appears right behind youngtaek and now both of you are cackling on the floor and youngtaek is about to set your backpacks on fire

you may have joined the school late but now you are an honorary 99 line member regardless of what year you were actually born in i don’t care they don’t care they’re just happy to have another ball of chaos to join their ranks

coach considers banning you from the gym but daeyeol reminds him that if he wants to ban you he’ll have to ban everyone else who comes in to visit and cause chaos aka his partner and you know daeyeol needs his hugs before practice so that isn’t going to happen

so you get to stay

most of the time it’s fine like you just sit in the bleachers and do homework while occasionally yelling at jibeom or other slackers, it’s only really during breaks that you act up

so anyway even though you’re an honorary 99 line member you spend most of your time with jibeom pulling dumb tricks or being unintentionally funny as fuck

therefore it is only logical that the rest of 99 line starts pushing you two together

fucking meddling brats

they do all the normal stupid shit like announcing outings to malls and ditching you two alone, deciding to go to the movies and ditching you two alone, you see the idea

look they’ve got pea brains they can’t come up with much

but get this: you and jibeom are already dating

yeah. you both started fucking dating a few months after meeting because you were both having a late night study session at your house and your tongues were loose with exhaustion and you may or may not have said some stuff you weren’t planning to

you almost kissed but then you were like it’s almost midnight and we haven’t brushed our teeth so maybe not tonight

it’s fine jibeom got a kiss the next day (the whole day he acted like he wasn’t waiting for it at all and you teased him for that before finally leaning in)

you haven’t kept your relationship secret out of shame or embarrassment or anything you both just kinda want to see how far 99 line + rest of golcha will go to get you two together. plus it’s nice when they buy you movie theater tickets when they just plan to ditch so you don’t have to pay for the date you end up having

it’s really fucking funny the more frustrated they get so you and jibeom don’t let up until daeyeol catches you two kissing just outside the locker room after you thought everyone left (NOTHING FUCKING NASTY OKAY THIS IS A SFW PLACE AND BEYOND THAT - NO ONE HERE IS GOING TO DO A N Y T H I NG OUTSIDE A L O C K E R R O O M)

shit goes down in the volleyball group chat that night but you and jibeom are just sitting together on his couch laughing at everything

99 line definitely holds a grudge

daeyeol won’t shut up about how he needs to clean his eyes out with bleach (as if he doesn’t want to kiss his partner every five seconds jfc)

coach just despairs over the chaos you two bring

but you and jibeom don’t care :) 

side note you know what’d be fun - if you don’t have the slightest fashion sense like jibeom and you two become known for wearing stripes + whatever your favorite design happens to be all the damn time

idk i just think it’d be funny to watch everyone trying to clown you but literally neither of you giving a shit

donghyun - healing

so like casey said donghyun has healing abilities

and first and foremost he would like to say he’s tired of healing the injuries these idiots get every practice

i mean he’s not going to refuse treatment for like a jammed finger or a sprained ankle because that’s normal in volleyball or even burns from youngtaek/joochan because that’s just accidentally losing control which could happen to anyone but like??? falling over because you tried to prank jangjun and he basically backhanded you out of surprise??? that’s on you jibeom

kidding kidding donghyun will heal whatever’s been set on golcha but he WILL complain about it the whole time

that’s his right ok if he has to deal with this bunch of idiots (who also don’t fucking clean up after themselves) he’s going to complain about it with his whole chest

which is not a very broad chest but donghyun can talk a Long time so that more than makes up for it

gets teased by all the other team members but they’re really grateful for him not just because of his healing abilities + affinity for cleaning but also because he really does care for them

and as much as he complains he’ll do as much healing as needed, even if it drains his energy

but there are two major cons of his abilities

1. using his power too much (like all other powers) drains him of energy, so if he heals one too many injuries at a time then he’s in danger of also passing out

it isn’t usually a problem because it’s not like golcha gets injured every five seconds but some practices are more accident prone than others

once joochan fell and broke his leg and donghyun passed out trying to heal it and ended up in the hospital too. not fun

2. he can’t use his power on himself. like if sungyoon fractures his finger donghyun can fix that no big deal but he can’t do the same to himself healing just doesn’t work that way

it is for this reason that each sports team has a designated healer who isn’t a member of the team - of course if the team has a member who is a healer that’s useful, but they need to keep their energy up + they can’t heal themselves which is a problem

anyway the last healer for the volleyball team graduated last year so you come in to take their place

you’re super nice to golcha like you heal their injuries whenever anything happens no matter how stupid it was and they start making jokes about how you’re more helpful than donghyun haha because you don’t complain/nag about everything

and like donghyun knows they’re teasing but at the same time... it kinda hurts

what makes it worse is that you’re nothing but nice to him as well? like it’d be so much easier to dislike you if you were rude

so donghyun just kinda... avoids you and doesn’t say anything about it to anyone. does his absolute best to avoid getting injured so he doesn’t have to be around you any more than necessary

and several times you try to make conversation but he just brushes you away which leaves you confused and makes donghyun feel worse but he really doesn’t know what else to do

then one bad day he jumps up but misses the ball and falls on his leg hard. like really hard and there’s pain shooting up his side but he can’t feel a break or anything so he just gets up and tries to keep playing, like practice ends in five minutes anyway he may as well continue 

but you call out and say to stop practice, donghyun’s hurt 

except donghyun has had a really bad day and this is just the icing on the cake so he may or may not yell at you to go away, he’s fucking fine, and when you keep pressing he just grabs his stuff and leaves

the second he gets home he collapses on the floor and just... stays there because yeah he may not have broken anything but his leg hurts like a bitch and then he starts crying

skips school the next day because he feels like absolute shit (mentally and physically) but 99 line comes to visit and they’re like so. explain what happened yesterday at practice

and donghyun is ready to get defensive but they’re more confused than anything, his outburst wasn’t like him at all and why would he yell at you? you never did anything wrong

that’s when donghyun breaks down and tells them everything about how he’s felt over the past few months with you as the new healer

it ends in a big cuddle session between four idiots and apologies and donghyun promises to apologize to you tomorrow 

which he does. and surprisingly you’re really gracious about it, it makes donghyun feel worse yet again because you’re so genuine and nice and you even offer to heal his leg again because it looks like it still hurts

the teasing decreases and donghyun feels much better, he also stops brushing you off and actually begins hanging out with you a little outside of school/practice

and while working late on a group project for history (your other group mates ditched you two and donghyun is still seething over it) he realizes that this has evolved into a stupid crush

said crush is only compounded when you tell the teacher half of your group did absolutely nothing without donghyun having to say anything

but of course since donghyun 1. is an idiot and 2. pretended to hate you for several long months he doesn’t say anything

until you fucking ask him to the end of the year dance. you ask him to the dance and donghyun thinks joochan has given him electric shock because his brain definitely has to be malfunctioning

after five solid seconds of short-circuiting he nods like an idiot and haha you’re going to the dance together

golcha boys won’t shut the fuck up about how cute it is or whatever 

donghyun blushes red while you just smile serenely and promise not to heal their injuries for the next week so they better avoid getting hurt

yeah donghyun is definitely in love with you

you’re probably a more low-key couple, you enjoy study dates or quiet activities more than like. amusement parks or whatever kind of shit joochan/jangjun subject their partners to

you might kiss in public if the moment feels right but more often than not the only real pda you show is holding hands which makes golcha coo

donghyun would rather hug you sweetly in private without worrying about his teammates trying to ruin the moment anyway

you agree but then proceed to kiss his nose in front of everyone and whoops he’s a blushing mess and golcha (+ the coach) are screaming

sigh

joochan - electricity

ah yes, the ultimate question: which hurts more, electric burns or fire burns?

join the golden child volleyball team and you can experience both firsthand!

jk (not really) but between joochan and youngtaek, golcha kinda has their pick of what kinds of burns to get (other than like. rope burn or burns from sliding on the ground idk)

like casey said it’s v lucky donghyun/his partner are around to heal them because really trying to slap a volleyball with a burnt hand is not fun

most of the time though joochan’s fine, he’s just full of energy and gets staticky when excited and like casey came up with the boys will sometimes dare each other to touch his hair when it’s sticking straight up and get shocked

or if you’re a bitch like jangjun you’ll take someone’s hand and purposely place it there so they get shocked

(jangjun’s also stupid though so he gets shocked by proxy if joochan’s staticky enough)

(i mean at least it makes everyone laugh???)

(yes this was inspired by that one video where he and bomin (i think) are playing with the lie detector (or was it the jangstar episode with daeyeol?? i can’t remember) and he put his hand over bomin’s/daeyeol’s and got wrecked too)

jesus christ this is supposed to be about joochan not jangjun let’s get back on track

anyway when joochan gets worked up either out of excitement or a more negative emotion the one thing that never fails to calm him down is music

he can play several instruments and sings very well 

so if it’s been a bad day or he’s feeling anxious, he’ll either go to the school music rooms of his own accord or daeyeol will notice and send him there to calm down a little before practice

which is where he finds you!

joochan’s playing the piano one day, singing n stuff and completely oblivious to you sleeping under the goddamn piano

how did you end up there? you were waiting for a friend/sibling (whichever one you choose) to finish up some after school activity so you could walk home together and you were sleepy and under the piano seemed like a decent place to nap so you set an alarm and passed out

look high school is draining so if you’re not making the best decisions by the end of the day who can blame you

and the piano is a real grand (let’s pretend the school has money shall we) so unless joochan was really looking (which he wasn’t), he wouldn’t have noticed you at the back

joochan’s there for a couple hours playing peacefully

AND THEN YOUR ALARM FUCKING RINGS 

joochan screams and falls off the stool

you shoot up and hit your head on the bottom of the piano

for a moment you two just groan in pain and then you look at each other and are like. what the fuck

and then it’s your turn to scream

anyway you both stop screaming eventually (miraculously no one comes in) and you try to explain to joochan as best you can and he just stays silent and you’re apologizing and then he busts out laughing

and somehow both of you are laughing through the pain and even though joochan wasn’t feeling too good earlier he feels even better laughing with you

when you eventually leave you have a new number in your phone and the promise of seeing joochan tomorrow :)

first thing joochan does when you go is text the 99 line group chat and be like guys someone fell asleep under the piano while i was playing and then woke up and my butt hurts from falling off the stool out of surprise but i think i’m in love

donghyun: stop being dramatic

jibeom: yeah what’ll happen when you accidentally shock them for the first time

joochan: you guys are horrible

but it turns out jibeom is... actually a little bit right

and it’s even worse. because your power is over water

water + electricity Do Not Mix

it isn’t usually too big of a problem? because it’s not like you conjure water out of anywhere or are always soaking wet bc you need water around to manipulate it, you can’t create it yourself

so like it’s kind of fine

except for some reason you react a little worse to joochan’s electric shocks (even mild ones) primarily due to your power which isn’t fun at all

it’s not just you, water manipulators are known to have more averse reactions to electric shocks than people with other powers

but it sucks because you really like joochan and he really likes you and both of you definitely want to ask each other out but how is this going to work if just being around joochan might be a hazard to you?

and for the first time joochan just... he really hates his power

like he’s given people some small burns before on accident but they weren’t big

with you though, even if it’s a small shock you react more badly than anyone expects and joochan really fucking hates it

after several volleyball practices where joochan is really out of it, daeyeol is about to ask what’s up but surprisingly jangjun steps up and says let me handle it

because after getting together with his partner, he thinks he has an idea of what joochan’s upset about

and when he asks joochan spills everything

it’s the first time joochan has really seen jangjun serious about anything other than volleyball or his partner

so jangjun tells joochan about what his partner told him, and really knocking someone unconscious once or twice isn’t as bad (though still bad) as getting electrocuted by a stray fucking spark

but similar advice applies. all powers have a destructive side and it shouldn’t stop joochan from living, he just has to learn to control himself as best as he can. there’s nothing more he can do but that

and this gives joochan the courage to ask if you want to talk about it

i’m going to say it ends well because i’m the author and i’m not going to give joochan a sad ending (he’s joochan what the fuck how could you do that to him) but you do acknowledge what could happen if either of you loses control

which just makes you two more determined to completely master your abilities so you won’t inadvertently hurt each other

really it’s sweet. joochan is still excitable but sparks fly off of him a lot less and the few that do you take care to avoid until his hair stops sticking up with static

and you take care to keep water away from him when he’s full of electricity

when joochan kisses you for the first time your lips tingle like his electricity is bleeding into you but it’s pleasant and sweet unlike his sparks and it just makes you want to kiss him all the time

(you tell that to him and he has to take like five minutes to figure out how to breathe again)

99 line won’t stop clowning you two for how you met and jibeom shows you the text about being in love that joochan sent 

legend says you can still hear jibeom’s electrocuted (not really he’s just being dramatic) screams in the gym late at night

yeah it’s cute you like bringing joochan roses bc they’re his favorite flower and joochan likes to bring you your favorite snacks and jangjun + his partner view you two like younger siblings in a way bc of the nature of your relationship

one big happy family until joochan’s hair sticks up and you have to yeet away

it’s fine though as long as you give him a kiss after he’s calmed down :)

bomin - mind reading

this one turned out so long compared to the others why

for context this was 1.7k and the others were all comfortably between 1k or 1.2k i'm gonna scream

anyway. bomin. mind reader like casey said. he’s kind of got it bad

well all mind readers do until they learn to block off their ability until they actually want to use it

which bomin is learning but he’s young and he found out his powers a little late so he doesn’t have as much experience

meaning whenever he goes to school his head kind of feels like it’s going to explode :/

it’s okay in volleyball - actually if anything it’s kind of useful

because yeah bomin is focused on the game, but he keeps a bit of his mind open to his teammates’ thoughts so he knows where to move or where to keep open and all that

and if the other team is a bunch of assholes he doesn’t stop from reading their minds a little so golcha’s ready to take them on :) small advantages

so where volleyball is concerned it’s not that big of an issue, even when the gym is full of spectators bomin can usually focus even without latching onto an empty mind because there’s so much going on in the game and he has to concentrate on that

however in uninteresting classes or when he’s just having a not good day...

luckily it’s gotten better after a year or so, like bomin can mostly filter out the world if he focuses on just one person’s thoughts

which is usually youngtaek (as casey + irl bomin came up with) because quote unquote ‘there’s not much going on up there’

yes i know i said that already in youngtaek’s part but it’s still hilarious to me and now it’s bomin’s turn so i’m saying it again. sue me

except now youngtaek has a partner about whom he thinks all the fucking time if he isn’t focusing on music/volleyball/class (though the last one is a little less frequent) so concentrating on youngtaek’s mind is now not exactly an option for bomin

no one’s mind is really empty at this point or at least not empty enough for bomin to use as a sort of safe space so he just resigns himself to having to go through all of this until he finally gets the hang of blocking off his ability

so the school year ends and daeyeol/sungyoon graduate wonderful blah blah blah long story short bomin is in all new classes with many new people and it is... a bit much

but life goes on and there’s not much bomin can do about things except work on his own power so even though he’s kinda crumbling around the edges he just smiles and bears it

and then he gets paired with you for a school project. at first it’s not anything special, just a regular project right

but then you guys decide to meet up at a cafe to work on it and it’s more crowded than either of you expected and bomin hasn’t had the greatest day so he just... stops in the middle of the cafe with this weird expression on his face because he’s just really overwhelmed

he doesn’t expect you to grab his wrist and drag him out of the cafe and into a quieter area of the street

and he really doesn’t expect you to say hey. focus on my mind, okay? my mind. focus. 

but he manages to and there’s just blissful emptiness and bomin latches on like it’s his lifeline (in a way, it is) and after a few minutes he manages to get his head together

turns out you have a sibling at home who’s also a mind reader and when they were still learning to control their power you learned to empty your thoughts temporarily so they’d have a place to focus on if things got to be too much

you also have a golden tongue (that you always control carefully) but it helps calm bomin down after he says it’s fine if you use it

after that you tell him if he’s having a mini crisis he can always find you

and bomin just about cries because after daeyeol/sungyoon graduated he kind of felt like his support network at school was missing something bc as much as he clowns them (daeyeol especially) he really relied on both to talk to about his mind-reading issues

now that you’re offering to support him... it just means a lot

definitely doesn’t help that he’s had a bad day in general and his emotions are kinda fraught at this point

you don’t end up getting anything done that day, you just take bomin over to your house bc no one’s there and your family won’t mind even if he’s still there when they get home, so you just take the time to get to know each other a little when bomin feels good enough to interact

he apologizes a lot for nothing getting done but you just hit him and tell him to shut up, it’s not his fault and you still have a couple weeks to work on it so it’s fine

you guys work on the project and it goes well in the end but even after that you and bomin still stay in contact

since you have a sibling who went through the same stuff bomin did, you have some tips to share about blocking out other minds even if your power isn’t the same

plus your golden tongue is really useful in calming bomin during the moments he needs it. you always make sure to get his permission to use it before you do though

when bomin asks about it you say it’s because of consent and stuff and if you don’t get permission it feels more like manipulation than helping? 

to him the similarities between you and daeyeol on that end are uncanny (even if you’re less awkward sorry not sorry daeyeol) and bomin just admires you all the more for it

anyway life’s going well, you and bomin are really good friends now but maybe like halfway through the year or something bomin senses that you’re becoming a little more closed off?

like he does his best not to read your mind but sometimes he gets accidental glimpses and though they’re usually pretty free (as in you don’t care what you’re thinking about around him) he now gets less of these glimpses and when he does, your mind seems emptier than usual

and he doesn’t want to bring it up? because that equals admitting he reads your mind sometimes no matter how accidental it is and with your emphasis on consent with your power bomin isn’t sure how well you’d take it

but then you avoid him for like two weeks so bomin breaks down about it to daeyeol over the phone and yeah it’s time for you two to talk

it takes some awkward silence and prodding and really big effort on bomin’s part to not willingly see what you’re thinking but the gist of it is

you have a fat crush on bomin and you’ve been avoiding him because you don’t want him to accidentally see any of it

bomin is like... y/n what the heck i have a crush on you too why didn’t you say anything :(

anyway it’s time for big reveals i guess so bomin admits he accidentally sees into your mind every so often and he feels really bad about it but you’re super understanding bc of your sibling of course

and bomin feels kind of stupid for worrying so much he should’ve thought of that but oh no now you’re hugging him and saying sorry into his shirt so pretty much all thoughts fly out of his mind because maybe this is a little like heaven to bomin

dating you is so refreshing. he’s so happy to have someone around who completely understands like yeah there are other mind readers in the school but it’s not as common a power as others and they’ve been masters at blocking out the world for a long while that they’ve kinda forgotten about how it feels to a beginner

but you’re so sweet and understanding and bomin feels even better when he meets your sibling who teases you two of course but also serves as another pillar of support for him

it’s not just one-sided either. like even though bomin tries not read your mind without permission, he’s still good at picking up on your moods even if you’re not explicit which makes it so much easier to trust and confide in him

and even if you’re not in the mood to talk he gets that too - he won’t force you to do anything

on the occasions when even you can’t pick through your own thoughts you let bomin take a peek in and even if he can’t help in the moment it’s enough that someone else knows and understands :)

you’re so fucking cute together. like the rest of golcha coos over you. even donghyun who’s the most low-key with his partner jfc

daeyeol and sungyoon come back from university to visit and bomin’s like. we’ve got to hide

you: why

bomin: just trust me

long story short you do not (you: they’re your former teammates and friends! how bad can it be?) and uh by the end of the day maybe you’ve had enough teasing about you/bomin for the rest of your life

but when he’s not teasing you do hit it off with daeyeol bc of the same powers thing and secretly bomin’s really happy that two of the people he treasures the most get along so well

yeah you and bomin are just super cute and rely on each other a lot in a healthy way and you’re always there for each other

everyone wishes they had as nice a relationship as you two :)

you: you shouldn’t. bomin teases me every five fucking seconds about something i did like three months ago

bomin: and yet you love me :)

you: debatable

bomin :|

(it’s ok you kiss him later and he gets smiley again which you delight in seeing even if he does go back to teasing you five seconds later)

If you enjoyed, please don’t forget to reblog and leave a comment to tell me what you thought! Thank you for reading and have a lovely day <3

(1 reblog = 1 prayer for the team coach he needs some support dealing with all these brats)

[s1utspeare]

DMBJ Characters as Shakespeare Leads

I got into it in the notes of a moonfall echo post and now I’m going insane about what Shakespeare Characters each DMBJ person vibes the most with who do I blame for this

ANYWAY WELCOME TO MY LATEST NONSENSE THESE ARE MY PERSONAL OPINIONS AND ALSO BASED ENTIRELY ON VIBES ALONE

WU XIE as VIOLA from Twelfth Night

okay bear with me, I know this is a strong one coming right out the gate. But the GAY ENERGY. the ATTEMPTING TO BE SOMEONE THEY’RE NOT ALL THE TIME. the sheer amount of LOVE INSIDE. also this bitch spends SO much time in the series dressed up as other people like??? mans loves cosplaying except the cosplay is for Life and Death Situations. also the love triangles are hilarious. plus they’re both cute and gay and i love them

ZHANG QILING as CORIOLANUS from Coriolanus

did i choose these two because they’re arguably the hottest characters in each of their canon? maybe. also Cori Boy is the only one violent enough to even come CLOSE to xiao-ge’s deadly energy. I could have done Hamlet, who is the only other real Shakespearian swordsman, but Hamlet talks too much. also something about the desperation and side-switching that appeals to me. OH THEY BOTH HAVE GOOD TITS yeah that’s a good reason too

WANG PANGZI as THE FOOL from King Lear

okay before any of you come for me in the notes, the Fool is arguably the greatest Shakespearean character. They’re only CALLED the Fool cause it’s their job, but actually they’re the only one with any braincells in the play. Both start out as the archetypal comic relief character and then become the heart and soul of the story. The Fool makes a bunch of jokes and also prophesies the end and possibly is magic?? who’s to say. But anyway Pangzi also does all of those things and I feel like he should get to wear a funny hat. plus the Fool just has to deal with idiots trying to take his job by being clowns for free, and Pangzi can relate to that energy I think

LIU SANG as ARIEL from The Tempest

If it weren’t for just the SHEER amount of creepy magical energy they both exude, it’s the loyalty and sacrifice that does it for me. Not only are they both Ethereal Beings, there’s also a lot of sound ties to Ariel in The Tempest, so like it checks out. Plus they both Crouch. Also I just want Liu Sang to be able to smite some bitches sometimes. That would be good for him (it’s NOT because they’re both my favorite characters IT’S NOT)

Bai Haotian as Puck from A Midsummer Night’s Dream

So this is not only because i have a thing for casting women as Puck, but also because they fit so well together!! like. they both have crushes on people they perceive to be in authority! they both like being helpful! they both should get to be a little feral and also do magic! like Xiao Bai would be SUCH a cute Puck and if Wu Xie weren’t such a dumbass he’d make a good Oberon but alas. He is a Dumbass. so Xiao Bai is Puck but Wu Xie doesn’t get to be in Midsummer because he is simultaneously Too Dumb and Not Dumb Enough. 

LI CU as PRINCE HAL from Henry IV Part I

sorry for more Tom Hiddleston pics but he’s genuinely like the best Shakespearian actor I’ve ever seen, and he’s done it all. Anyway Li Cu is Hal but specifically Hal from Part I because Part II isn’t as good and Hal is basically Dead when we get to Henry V so it has to be Part I. Anyway. Troubled youth who doesn’t want to do what his father wants so he basically gets kidnapped and raised by an older man who is full of Trickery and also Witty Remarks? The Best Friends Trios? The evolution into a Hero in Their Own Right? These guys are perfect for each other. Also I go feral about both of them at any given moment

A-NING as LADY MACBETH from Macbeth

YES I used A-Ning from Time Raiders because I think she’s the hottest version of A-Ning WHAT ABOUT IT. Anyway A-Ning could be no one other than the scheming girlboss Lady Macbeth. They’re both Morally Ambiguous but Fuck they look so good doing it. Can And Will manipulate literally any man into doing what they want. Su Nan was also a contender for Lady Macbeth because she resonates very strongly with the “Out, damned spot!” monologue, but she respects authority too much. A-Ning would not hesitate to kill the bitchass king of Scotland so that her family could ascend to the throne and I love that for her

ZHANG DADDY RISHAN as HAMLET from Hamlet

OKAY BEFORE ANYONE SAYS “brigid i know u chose them because ur a simp for zhang daddy rishan and ur a simp for hamlet stop being so predictable” LITERALLY NO ONE ELSE COULD DO IT THO??? LIKE??? ok they both are setting their life purpose on the bedrock of an older mentor figure’s death... they both have to deal with conspirators trying to usurp them... both the Ultimate Tragic Hero and Make Me Cry Every Damn Day... both are torn away from their nerd boyfriends by death... they both live in my head rent free... I know Zhang Daddy Rishan does not talk as much as Hammie Boy but I 100% think that there’s a CONSTANT monologue going on in his head at all times. Also the Am I A Coward speech? That’s our Daddy Rishan to the MAX. No one look at me or im gonna start making picsets of him with Hamlet quotes superimposed over it I swear to GOD

and finally.... 

WU SANXING as IAGO from Othello

Not only does this picture from the NTL production of Othello represent what I want to do to Sanshu every time I see him onscreen, but these bitches are two of The Fakest Hos I have ever come across. It’s a love-hate relationship with them most of the time; you hate them for what they’re doing to the heroes, but they’re so good at the Trickery that you can’t help but admire them for it a little bit. They can, have, and will sell their family members for a single Lick of Power and Wealth. And yeah, you could MAKE an argument for them to be Good or at the very least Morally Ambiguous but they’re both giant dicks and deep down in our hearts we all know it. 

[wickedgamesoyaoya]

Buddy! Congratulations! I’m so proud of you. You deserve it. 💜🤩 this event is everythingggg. When I was reading through the quotes I was picking where it was from and I just 🤩🤩

Can I request a fluff piece with Iwa? (Phrase 5 or 6) written or SMAU it doesn’t matter cause I love all your stuffs 😘😘

~♏️

The journey from the hospital to your shared home could easily be classified as an interrogation, albeit an unsuccessful one. After confirming that you were no longer in any pain, Iwaizumi had begun his investigation into the details of what occurred. However, instead of answering each targeted inquiry with a calculated response, you elected to sing out a song-lyric to tease your already stressed boyfriend. With the fibreglass supporting your injured hand and the pain killers lacing into your bloodstream, you felt perfectly normal. Hell, you wished you had the cast when you punched the idiot earlier. That way you could have broken more than his nose.

Once the vehicle pulled into the driveway, Iwaizumi instructed you to remain inside with an unnaturally long sigh. Your brows knitted together in curiosity as you watched him jog around the car to greet you on the passenger side. After tugging open the door completely, his gaze travelled from your cast to the surrounding area.

“You know my other hand works fine, right? And nothing is going to happen, stop that.” Exiting the car, a playful smile graced your lips. It was a small attempt at dismantling his concerns, and it could have worked if he bothered to return his attention to you.

“No.” His refusal was muttered plainly, indicating the matter was not up for debate. That was the thing with Hajime. Once his overprotective nature had activated, there was no stopping him.

“Haj, don’t be mad at me. I’m okay, I promise.” The second after he finished closing the passenger side door, you hooked an arm through his before batting your eyelashes up at him.

“I know you’re fine, but I’m not. I don’t like seeing you hurt.” The athletic trainer squinted at you, swallowing the growl that threatened to sound in his throat. “Can you blame me?” Removing his stare from yours, he fished out the keys to the house. As he unlocked the door and guided you inside, a sigh of defeat rolled off your lips.

“I guess not.”

Iwaizumi was mostly satisfied with your admission, a fact illustrated by the weakened scowl on his features. Now that he successfully brought you into the safety of the living room, he could breathe a little easier.

“Just go rest. I’m gonna make us some food.” He was about to shrug off his coat when his irises landed on you and the facial expression you had adorned.

The infamous puppy dog expression. One of the many expressions that would melt the man’s heart within seconds. With an intake of breath, he curled an arm around your waist, leading your body closer to his. Eliminating the space between your faces, he placed a gentle kiss against your jutted bottom lip then another against your forehead. Each kiss that was applied had more of an impact on your body than the injury he was currently nursing. Noticing your weakened knees, a faint smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth.

“Idiot.” Once he released you from his hold, Iwaizumi administered a flick to your forehead, an action that led your dramatic self to collapse onto the couch behind you.

“My heart.” As you tried to recover from the soft gestures, your boyfriend finally removed his jacket, tossing it against the corner of the couch. Before he exited the living room, the trainer stole one final glance in your direction, humour bringing his eyebrows to raise. Of course, you were pretending to “melt” into the couch.

This was the same girl who punched a guy in the face hours ago? You really were something.

Minutes after Iwaizumi exited the room you shifted on the couch, no longer interested in maintaining a performance for an empty audience. As you squirmed around on the cushions, attempting to find the best position, you discovered his discarded jacket. Plucking the fabric up, a mischievous grin plastered against your visage. If you couldn’t cuddle with your boyfriend, you could at least cuddle with his jacket. 

The cloth had also completely absorbed his intoxicating scent, filling your senses with him.

Yeah. You could sleep like this.

Dinner took Iwaizumi a little longer than he anticipated. The recipe had stated the prep and cook time should be around an hour – it took him almost two hours. His ego was slightly bruised by his failure to complete the task during the allotted time, but at least it tasted good. After setting the table, he removed the apron from around him and then proceeded to the living room. Not once did it occur to him that he left a certain object within your reach - something you were not supposed to find. 

To his horror, you were no longer asleep on the couch. Instead you were playing a game on your phone with his jacket blanketing over you. Once you noticed his presence, excitement ignited inside your eyes. But confusion joined the emotion seconds later when you traced the panic he was struggling to conceal.

“Come on. Food is ready.” Clearing his throat with an artificial cough, he reached forward to grab the coat casually. Except instead of releasing the fabric, you grasped it tighter, sitting up in the process.

“Why are you being so suspicious?” The question spills from your lips too soon, because the answer is granted a moment later. The final tug on the material had resulted in the emergence of an item you were unaware of for the last two hours. The velvet box dropped onto the ground, the low thud sounding louder than the chaos ensuing inside of Iwaizumi’s chest.  “Haj…”

“It’s empty.” Scarlet coloured his neck as he engaged in a staring battle with the inanimate object. This was wrong – this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. But lying would certainly not fix the situation now. “Okay, it’s not. Let’s just pretend this didn’t happen.”

If you were drowsy before you were absolutely awake now. The butterflies inside your stomach were celebrating and your heart was seconds from caving in from the suspense. “Hajime. If you don’t ask me that question now, I’m going to ask you. And I want you to realize that I don’t have a ring, so I’m going to tie a rubber band around your finger.” 

He hated how he knew you would say something along those lines. 

Lowering himself onto one knee, he retrieved the box and tried to calm the sirens alarming inside his mind. He had something prepared – something he had rehearsed 100 times in front of the mirror, and 100 times in front of Oikawa. So why the hell was he frozen? Slowly his eyes lifted from the box to meet your expecting gaze.

“L/n f/n, you are one incredibly infuriating woman.” A laugh escapes your lips at the statement, and the sound brings a smile to his mouth. “You drive me insane. Sometimes I don’t know if I should be protecting you, or if the world needs protection from you. But what I do know is there is no one like you. You make me want to kill people I don’t know, but you also make me a better man.” The tears blurring your vision cause his heart to shoot up from his chest into his throat, the sensation wasn’t painful, however. It only made his following words sound much lighter. “I love you more than I ever knew was possible. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Whether that means picking you up at the hospital when you’re an idiot, or loving you when you act like a clown… I want to be there for it all. So, will you make me the happiest man and marry me?”

By the time he finally voiced the question you were patiently waiting for, your cheeks were puffed and stained with mascara.

“Of course I will, you gorgeous man!” Instinctively you offered out your right hand, forgetting the protective layer around it. For a moment your eyes flickered from the cast to the ring held out ahead of you. Iwaizumi expelled a chuckle at your dilemma, then took your left hand, slipping the ring on.

“You know in some countries they wear these on the left side anyway.” The adrenaline of the situation had hit its climax, and all he could do was grin at you with love and joy.

Once the ring was settled against your finger, another chorus of sobs rang out as you jumped onto him, peppering kisses all over his face.

“I love you so much. Let’s go get married now.” Pausing your storm of affection, a toothy smile was presented towards him. Iwaizumi rolled his eyes playfully then ruffled your hair.

“How about we eat first and then go get married?”

A/N: I really hope you guys like this lololol

General taglist:  @haikyuufairy  @newfriendjen @lvoejimin @moonlightaangel @gyozaaaaa @byun-nies @thevillagehiddenintheinternet @amberalisa @graykageyama @yourstarvic @chaichai-the-weeb @dreamstormings @chibishae34 @haikyuusimp91 @volleybloop  @rajablast @idiot-juice-enthusiast @melonmayhere @cuddlesslut  @athenarosaline @memes-and-money @coconut-dreamz  @mismatched-loves @elianetsantana @tsumume @tsukkismamagucci @the-golden-jhope @camcam1617 @azumane-kun @prettyforpapiiwa @swoonhui 

Bolded means I can’t tag ya ~

[charming-2d-boys]

Adultrio with children (Illumi Version)

By the way, this one’s veeeery long, but I had too much fun 😅

You have been warned!

so, despite the usual push from the family for more future little assassins, Illumi isn’t really that thrilled by the idea

he seems like the type of person whose eyes and actions don’t really stray when he’s outside, especially on a mission or errand, whether personal or professional

that being said, the most likely way you’re going to meet Illumi is through others, whether that someone is Hisoka or his own family (but he doesn’t really trust Hisoka’s judgment when it comes to introducing someone to him, especially with the intent of getting together)

so, the family is the only viable option of meeting

Zeno is the one who comes up with a new option after several failed ones brought up by Silva and Kikyo

you, the granddaughter of an old friend and former partner of his, who used to be in charge of gathering information on the targets (not really a partner per se, but they participated in several missions together and became friends over the years)

smart, cute, close in age to Illumi and seemingly a lot more… empathetic and emotional-looking than our dear pincushion boy (who isn’t, though?)

Illumi is told about this and despite being asked for his opinion, it’s already decided nonetheless

unlike all the other candidates who were all asked - more like forced - into meeting formally and at the Zoldyck estate, you insist on meeting in a more casual place and fashion

Illumi, along with Kikyo, remain a bit shocked - Kikyo more than him because the audacity, but also the courage~

Silva doesn’t really care as long as they meet and Zeno laughs because he was expecting this from all the stories about you and your stubbornness and actions throughout the years that he heard from your grandfather

and it is settled: meeting in a quaint, little cat café in the town nearby, a little bit before lunch, no one else from your families except the two of you - coming with the promise that if you saw/sensed anyone keeping an eye on you two, you’d leave immediately and refuse any sort of contact from the family (again, shock because not many get to demand anything from the Zoldycks, but it seems that they already have a good feeling about you)

Illumi dresses up in some casual clothes (still with the flame pattern 🙄) and heads out, getting a pat on the back from Zeno and a good luck

when he enters the establishment and looks around, he sees you, next to a bookcase, with a very big and fluffy peach-coloured cat in your lap, both relaxed and watching the others around you

your eyes lock with Illumi’s when you sense his aura and you smile, beckoning him closer - cue Illumi raising an eyebrow because you’re not getting up to greet him and that’s rude, but he understands when you explain that you had to coax that cat with food and headpats for like 5 minutes until it stayed in your lap

so, he sits down next to you, petting the cat in your lap when its large, round, green eyes stare at him and next thing you know, you’ve got almost half of the other cats in the café flocking to Illumi, sitting on his lap and around him and purring loudly

the other customers can only stare, too afraid of his expressionless face to complain and when they see that the cats aren’t leaving him and returning to them, they’re slowly trickling out of the café until it's only the two of you (one of the staff members, who was apparently pushed by the other to come and talk to you, is quickly told, by you, that you’ll pay more by the end of the day to cover whatever losses they might acquire from the lack of clients, which makes them leave you two hurriedly)

you can only laugh when he stares at the cats and the empty room, then at you, almost clueless as to why you’re laughing

but you start talking and discover that you really like spending time with him

you talk about your families, your dreams, because he says that he doesn’t have any (liar), friends (again, liar) etc.

you really like that he cares about his family, even if it’s a bit twisted (good intentions, bad plan, especially when it comes to Killua)

since he was forced by his family to respect the tradition and become an assassin, he’s surprised when he finds out that despite the possibility of following the family tradition, you’re also allowed to make your own decisions, as long as you talk about them with your family

something that amuses you a lot is when Illumi receives a message from someone called Pain-in-the-Ass Clown, saying How’s your date going, Illumi-chan?  ⭐ ￣ ∀ ￣ 💧

and he explains that it’s someone really annoying who always bothers him

So, not your friend?

Never.

anyway, that was one of the first of many dates, with Illumi almost always letting you choose, mostly because you knew he’d choose some really fancy place and you wanted to have fun with him and get to know him naturally

despite his lack of expressions, he is having fun and likes that you’re happy (appreciates the fact that you are so... lively, you’re like complete opposites and apparently fit like two puzzle pieces)

Zeno is the one who pretty much declares that you’re the OTP

one of your dates definitely consisted in the two of you going on a mission together, just to see how you’d get along in a professional situation

100/10, no dilly-dally, professional from the beginning to the end of the mission, but you laughed and teased Illumi about how serious he was - as if it was just another normal day of meeting up after work... not after killing someone

the marriage proposal is more and more prominent in Illumi’s head and the rest of the Zoldycks and he’s wracking his brain trying to think of how to ask you

the two of you have bought an apartment and moved in to get used to living together and it’s going pretty well (definitely took a bit of convincing to get Illumi to agree, but he feels so human and happy with you that he just can’t say no and even his mother likes you, somewhat)

some nights are spent inside, watching movies, playing board games (he beats you here), video games (Illumi sucks at those) or cooking (he’s mostly watching and trying to remember everything, but man, too much work, he’s used to his butlers), while others involve you two going to bookstores, cafes, the zoo, even concerts/festivals

so, he decides on something that he read about on the holy Internet: Illumi had gone out that day and told you he’d come by later, but he actually bought you a puppy, who, as soon as it was put down, ran into the house when you squealed and picked it up to nuzzle it while it licked your face and wagged its tail; your fingers felt something on its collar and when you saw a ring, you froze, looking at Illumi without saying a word

he slowly approached you, face as expressionless as always (but he was so, SO nervous) and took the ring off the collar, getting on one knee and saying that you’ve made him feel happier and more human during those few months with you than he’s ever felt in all those years and he hopes that you’ll be willing to share your life with him and allow him to make sure you’ll always feel happy and loved

cue the tears because Illumi’s never said so many heartfelt words in one day and you’d be a monster to say no and extinguish that little sparkle of happiness in his eyes

so you put your puppy down and hug him tightly, kissing his face until he actually cracks a smile when the puppy whines because it wants your attention too

the wedding? Beautiful.

you? Gorgeous.

Illumi? He’s never been happier in his entire life

Hisoka cries at the wedding and is chosen as his best-man, along with Illumi’s brothers (even Killua accepted, especially after noticing the positive change you brought in the family and Illumi)

Alluka is your maid of honour along with Kalluto, because those two are attracted to you like moths to a flame

the reception is memorable, with various friends and family members congratulating you two and wishing you a long and happy marriage

things settle down a bit for a few weeks afterwards, especially after the honeymoon (which was spent somewhere where you could both enjoy some private time away from everyone as a newlywed couple)

and the biggest surprise was finding out that you’re pregnant (lucky~, that’s what Hisoka said when you texted him because yeah, you remained friends, somehow)

Illumi actually hugged you when you told him and kissed you because he was ecstatic

you definitely sat him down and told him that you need to talk with his family so they don’t get any ideas about torturing your child or children since you want them to have a normal, happy childhood

while a bit against it because that’s how he and all his siblings were raised, he definitely understands that it’s not only his decision to make and that he actually doesn’t really want anyone to go through what they did (especially after seeing that yes, even without training like his you can still be powerful and smart and somehow, his)

so, he agrees and tells the rest of the family (Zeno knew what your thoughts would be and never said anything, while Kikyo would probably be on the verge of having a stroke and Silva wouldn’t really care because they have Killua)

they can’t do much in terms of making you accept, especially because you don’t live at the estate and Illumi is loyal to his family, but now he’s got his own and he chooses you and your baby in the end

despite a few arguments with the Zoldycks, *cough* Kikyo *cough*, you still have the support of pretty much everyone else in the family and your own, so you actually can support yourselves just fine

Illumi insists on going shopping for baby clothes with you and is already looking at the variety of toys (he’s not gonna admit that he can’t wait to play with them when he’s spending time with his child because he wasn’t really allowed to have many toys or play with them so they wouldn’t make him stray from his path as an assassin)

likes talking to the baby bump and even sings to it (he’s got a beautiful singing voice and the baby always kicks when he sings something they like, which Illumi always take into account)

protective as hell whenever you’re out and about together and pretty much never lets you leave alone until you have a small argument that you can take care of yourself, after which he lets you be, but still insists on being called once an hour just to make sure and to have his heart put at ease

doesn’t even want to think about your weird craving because eww, some of them are gross (you know it, he knows it, the baby doesn’t care and when you’re hungry, neither do you)

will be there when you’re giving birth because he just wants to meet the baby faster and when he does, he smiles because there they are, his little bundle of joy

just stands and is fascinated by how small the baby is and how cute and squishy they look

it’s a girl, btw

almost always tells you to go to sleep when the baby wakes up in the middle of the night, especially because he can’t really sleep and he’s too happy and excited, plus he knows how tired you are

the baby’s first words are definitely dada and her little hands were just desperately reaching out to him (you practised with her whenever you could because you know how enamoured he is with his little girl)

Illumi actually breathed in deeply so he wouldn’t feel like crying anymore and just hugged you both while your daughter was patting his cheek

she inherits his long, black hair and they both spend the most amount of time in the bathroom taking care of it and brushing it

you’re the only one allowed to touch and braid their hair

she definitely likes all her uncles and aunts because they’re all so nice and doting and funny (Hisoka and Killua), while great-grandpa Zeno spoils her rotten

yes, Silva and Kikyo love her a lot as well, but inside they still want her to follow into their footsteps

you laugh at Illumi’s surprised face when your daughter asks you two for a brother or sister

oh boy... he’s gonna die from the cuteness and joy all these babies of yours are going to bring him

THAT was a lot, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless!

[oh-my-may]

Kageyama, Hinata, Bokuto and Oikawa with a really smart s/o

requested: hey! can i request some headcanons for kags, hinata, bokuto and oikawa with a crush on a reader who excels in school??

I had to think of a good High School friend of mine while writing this?? Oh well. It’s alittle short (especially Hinatas, I’m so sorry bby :c) but I didn’t want to write same thing for all of them so~

Fem!reader

Kageyama Tobio:

Thinks how can you even be a real person lol

Like ‘who likes learning’ ‘how does she know all of this?’ poor boy

He can’t help but gape at you everytime you raise your hand in class and then answer correct all the time

Or when the teacher passes out tests and says that you had the best results of the whole class 

(silently thinks you could probably win any quiz against Tsukishima and his positive feelings for you just grow 10x lol)

He slowly finds himself being attracted to you, because despite your good grades, you’re not an asshole like Tsukishima lol. You’re actually really nice and he likes that a lot. You never say no when someone asks you for help and you can explain things so easily

He finds himself just staring at you in class because he thinks you’re so pretty

Once he asks you for help with a math problem and while you explain it to him he barely listens to your words, he can just stare at your pretty face and your little gestures and he’s so close to you he can even smell your perfume someone help him-

Sometimes you turn around in class and smile and wave at him and he might just pass out

Will definitely blurt out the words “please go on a date with me” very unintentionally and very loud while you explain something to him

You both just kinda freeze as he looks at you in shock with widened eyes and face as red as lightning McQueen and you’re so surprised you don’t know what to say for a whole moment or two until you relax and smile. “Yeah, sure.” because who can ever say no to Tobio Kageyama

Hinata Shoyo:

Amazed babyboy

“How can she be a real person?” he thinks to himself as you get yet another A with all points in a test

Please teach him everything this boy needs help lol

Will very bluntly ask you for help and then gets really invested into doing better in class, showing off his best side 

Really everyone is impressed at how well he is doing until Kageyama exposes him and is like “it’s just because Y/n is in our class and he’s up her ass with his obvious crush on her” (Hinata totally smashes a ball in his face for that)

Will also stand up for you when someone calls you nerd and he notices! Will definitely defend you even though you tell him that it’s not necessary - he’ll stand up for you like a knight in shining armor does lol

He’s not as shy as Kageyama so he’d definitely just straight up ask you if you could hang after school to learn and you also 100% say yes because he’s just sooo precious!

Bokuto Koutarou:

A total crack head

Definitely the class clown you can’t tell me otherwise

If he can’t impress you with his knowledge he’ll efinitely do it with his jokes and pranks

Doesn’t even try to compete or keep up with you, he knows he could never be like you

Instead he always congratulates you on your grades and good work. “Nice one, Y/N!” “You really aced that test, huh? Just like I ace at volleyball ;) ;)”

ngl you’re kinda smitten by his behaviour he’s just so cute!

Whenever the teacher announces that you had the best result in a test he’ll stand up and just straight up clap and cheer for you oh no-

Definitely has a small cruhs on you since the beginning (he’s turned on by smart people) but he falls even harder for you when you help him out of his emo-mode once after he failed a test

You offer to help him study for the next test and tell that everyone has a bad day occasionally, even you. 

He doesn’t believe but his ears perked up at your offer and he’s so happy that he’ll spend some alone time with you!! A study date!! (You never said it was a date but honestly- you don’t complain)

You definitely won’t study a lot on that day (no, not because of what you think!) He distracts you the whole time because he’s singing or dancing around, showing you funny pictures on his phone or showing you how he spikes the ball lol

Oikawa Tooru:

Bit of a smart boy himself

Y’all can pry nerd!Oikawa from my cold dead hands okay

He definitely doesn’t do bad in school either, in fact I think he’s top of his class in some subjects

Until you appeared, that is. But instead of being mad at you he very quickly found himself developing a big fat crush on you because you’re so smart! You’re not like his fangirls or past girlfriends at all!

He totally wants to impress you and always sits next to you in class so you can work together when you’re doing team work!

Always wants to work on projects with you! He’s just so so impressed by you and he could listen to you talk about math formulas or photosynthesis or World War II without an end oh well he’s lost

Everyone hates you because you’re the best in most classes and no one can keep up with you

Actually it turns into a friendly rivalry between you two and yu silently always fight for the best presentation topics, who wrote more words in an essay, who handed it in earlier, who spent more hours studying or working on the project... It’s not even about the grades lol

Y’all very obviously crush on each other but the thing you have going on is too nice neither of you wants to ruin it

He still probably asks you out once the school year is over or something because you’re the most mpressive girl he’s ever met and you keep him determined and he just wants to learn so much more about you