#I’m only on season 1 please spare me spoilers

[wyspersss]

remember to keep your chaotic friends in check (og image is at the bottom)

Additionally:

og image:

[beautifulblooms]

Fighting Together to the End - Eddie Munson x Male!Reader - Part 2

Male! Reader, he/him used, so fuck the canon, it broke my heart, MEGA FUCKING SPOILERS FOR PART TWO OF SEASON FOUR, anyways, fluff, angst, this is pretty much a rewrite of season 4 because I need to recover after the traumatizing events of part 2

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

CIS Women and Female Aligned people, please DNI, this story and all of my others are for non-binary, masculine aligned and male readers!

Oh fuck, god damnit, WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING!?!? Just as we started to get comfortable in the boat house with the supply of food from the group and no one knowing where we are it has to go and get fucked. Of course the one person we didn’t want finding us is super close to figuring out where we are. Jason and the basketball team, well, the few he could convince to hunt two teenagers with him.

They were currently raiding the main house, thankfully they hadn’t figured out there was a separate building on the property.

“Baby we need a way out of here, they’re gonna find us eventually and I don’t think they’ll let us explain.” My panicking was only getting worse the longer the basketball team stayed in the house.

“We can’t run, they'll hear us and there’s nowhere we can run, shit I’m so sorry you’re involved in this. I didn’t want to drag you down with me.” Eddie looked down and bit his lip out of guilt and anxiety.

“Hey, look at me, this is not your fault, Chrissy was literally fucking possessed in your living room, there was nothing we could do to stop that. Don’t apologize for what you can’t control.” I grabbed his face to make him look at me, and pressed our foreheads together to try and calm the both of us down a little.

“Thank you,” Eddie opened his eyes to look at me.

“For what baby?” Tilting my head slightly in confusion I just stared at him with worried eyes.

“For not just ditching me or calling me crazy, for believing me, and for loving me.” His eyes started to well with tears and it hurt to see him in so much pain.

“Oh angel, c’mere.” I pulled him into my arms and let him cry against my chest. Lightly running my hands through his hair and whispering sweet words to him until I couldn’t hear him crying anymore, just sniffles. “Feel better baby? Alright, well, we still need a plan out of here.” I glanced around the room, and there it was, the perfect escape.

Of course the best place to hide would be the boat house with a literal fucking boat right in front of us. We were set, as long as we were able to get the boat onto the water and away from shore without making too much noise.

“Hey, Ed’s, I’ve got an idea but I need a bit of help.” He lifted his head up to look at me before noticing I stood up and moved to uncover the boat.

“You fucking genius, I love you so much.” I almost paused at his words but we didn’t have more time to spare.

“I love you too, now help me with this.” We had managed to get the boat uncovered and out the back of the house with as little noise as possible. Rushing back in I snagged two oars for us to use, the motor would be too loud and might get the guys attention.

“Catch babe.” Tossing the oar at Eddie he climbed into the boat, me following not too far behind. As soon as we got a steady rhythm we were set and started heading to the other side of the lake.

“Jason! There they are!” Oh shit, fuck fuck fuck, one of the idiots in the house saw us, we’re so screwed.

“Fuck shit god damnit we got so far!” I started to move the oar faster but we started to turn slightly. Soon enough Jason and another one had stripped their shirts off and started swimming to us. We both started to move the oats faster to outswim them but they were catching up quick.

“Get back you son of a bitch! We didn’t do shit so leave us alone!” I had given up getting away and decided to stick my ground using the oar as a weapon aimed at Jason. But then the other person on the team stopped moving and began glancing around.

“Patrick! What are you doing man?” Jason noticed his friend had stopped swimming. Then all of a sudden he was dragged under water. How could that happen, he was swimming just a few moments ago. Jason turned around to get back at me when Patrick flew out of the water into the sky.

“No, no not again.” Eddie mumbled behind me. We both knew what to expect now. And soon what happened to Chrissy happened to Patrick right in front of us while Jason witnessed it all for the first time. I turned around to look at Eddie only to see he had fallen out of the boat when Jason began fighting with me.

“Eddie! C’mon we gotta go!!” I pulled him back into the boat and seeing as he lost his oar when he fell into the lake I sat in the front and began to get us to land. Bumping the shore me and Eddie hopped out, thankfully we were close to another place with cover, skull rock.

Sprinting off to the make out spot we ducked under the rock and sat down for the first time in a good half an hour of straight running.

“Are you okay? I didn’t get to check on you after you fell in.” Doing a once over on Eddie I noticed he was thoroughly soaked.

“Besides soaking wet, and having a now busted walkie-talkie I’m pretty okay, how are you holding up?” Of course he still finds a way to be funny at a time like this.

“I’m fine, just glad we have each other through all of this, criminals together to the end.” He looked at me with his adorable smile, even on the run as a murderer he’s still cute.

“We need a new walkie, isn’t there a construction sight a couple miles south of here? I’m sure one of them has gotta have one we can nab.” Clever little shit he is, figuring that out in a matter of minutes.

“Sounds like a great plan, for the morning, no one’s gonna be there this late at night, so let’s just sleep here, how about that?” Sprinting that far and rowing a boat was really tiring, I just wanted to sleep for a while.

“Of course, in the morning, goodnight (y/n).”

“Good night Ed’s”

[knullanon]

invincible bullshit that i came up with 10 days ago i just forgot about it

ngaoevnbiaebiw its here @anxiousnerdwritings i hope you like it i got inspired by you to write this

words: 2196

warnings: past arguing, MAJOR SPOILERS FOR ENTIRE SEASON 1, shooting, arguing, past manipulation

“Reports of who killed the Guardians of the globe are starting to surface, with our agents finding out about the supposed killer: we know they spared Omni-Man, killed the rest of the members, and then fled. We also know they are not from earth. Lots of people have speculated that Omni-Man is the one behind these killings, however, the government has ruled out that being a possibility, since there was no evidence of Omni-Man doing these actions. More at 7 tonight on-”

The program stopped playing as you saw a contact appear on the top of the screen, and reading it, you immediately perked up.

Swiping on the green button, you happily said, “Hey, Dad! What’cha need?”

You heard a chuckle from the other end, before he said, “Hey kiddo, how you holding up?”

“Nothing much going on here, you good over there?”

“Yup, mostly everything is fine. You know my work, they always have something for me to do.”

“Hopefully that clears up soon.”

“Yeah, hey, listen, where are you right now?”

Ugh, not this again. Your mood slightly dropped as you remembered a few years ago, when you first met Cecil. He wasn’t as good as he is now, and he would always be asking where you would be. Even in school. However, that was all in the past, since you were older, he now knew that you were responsible enough to do things on your own. At least, that’s what he wanted you to believe.

“Uh, well, I was just gonna go hang out with some friends and then go back home. Why?”

“Ok, listen to me very carefully: one of my guys is gonna pick you up near Bridgetown, ok? You’re gonna get a bracelet from them and then I’ll explain the rest here.”

What the fuck? “Oh, um, ok, when will they be there?”

“About 5 minutes. Be there soon, love you, bye.”

He hung up the phone quickly, which was extremely rare, even for him, since he would never show his love to you out publicly and you would feel weird if he even did. However, on the phone or in private he was a completely different person, having a great personality and he was an even better dad.

Well, he did say to hurry up, and 5 minutes. You checked the time and when you saw it was near 1. You strided your way towards the street he told you to meet on, and cheerfully thought of the ways to hang out with your friends after whatever he wanted to do. Maybe you could go to the mall? Maybe the food court? You’ve been meaning to try those damn milkshakes at that new bar everyone is talking about, but it was always so crowded. You never liked crowded places in the first place.

Suddenly, your phone rang again. This time, when you checked, it was your dad again. Strange. It was weird for him to call you twice in a row. He usually got to the point within a few sentences.

Picking up the phone, you said, “Hey dad-”

“________, listen to me. Get to someplace safe now. Get out of the road. Get out of the public. I don't care if you have to go inside someone else’s house, just get out of sight.”

Stopping in the middle of the road you let out some surprised stutters. “Wh- Dad, what are you talking about?”

“_______, please, just listen to me when I say this, you are in danger and you need to get out of there.”

“Why? What’s happening?”

You were shuffling around trying to find a good place to “hide” while your dad went into complete panic mode in his voice. “_______, find a place to hide, and whatever you do, get out of open space.”

You heard him speak to someone off the phone, before he cursed out loud. “I have to call you back, but someone will be there, wherever you are, ok? I… I love you.”

Before you could answer him, he hung up the phone. Anxiety was the only thing you could feel, as you looked around the desolate neighborhood. There was a reason why you chose this area over others: it was quiet and small. Not only that, but the only people who walked this way were people who were not fond of bigger crowds. In fact, you haven’t seen anyone go this way for a long time. You always wondered why, since it was the perfect way to get robbed. Of course, that would never happen, especially with all those lessons from your dad about self defense.

The street you were on had walls surrounding the sidewalk to prevent people from going into people's backyards, probably. They were too high up to climb, and they were concrete, so it wouldn’t be easy to just hop over and call it a day.

However, you were almost at the end of the street, and you knew there was a little patch of bushes and leaves that would provide the perfect cover. They were almost as tall as your dad, which always made you wonder who was watering them to be that big.

Pacing quickly towards the end of the street, and seeing no one in sight made you let out a sigh of relief. Either dad was overeating or something bad was happening, and you don’t know which would be worse. When Cec- dad overrated, it always got messy, no matter what it was about.

“Why were you out so long? I was about to send a team after you-”

“Cecil, it’s fine, I just had to talk to my-”

“Don’t call me Cecil, and don’t try to make excuses, tell me who you were with right now or I swear to god-”

You forgot the memory almost as soon as it came up, instead choosing to focus on getting to the brush where you could hide until C- Dad came to pick you up. Wherever he was. Actually, did he give you a time that he would be there?

You got a weird feeling that made you sprint towards the bushes and dive in, like there was someone behind you. You ignored it and forced your way on all fours, ignoring the cuts and scratches you were getting on your arms and legs.

There was almost a whooshing sound above you, and you wondered if your dad sent a fucking jet to get you. But that thought left your mind when you heard it right next to you, along with the sound of someone making a harsh landing onto the street. You were able to hear the little bits and pieces of concrete fly off the ground to hit the ground again.

You stayed completely still, leaning on your arms while your body was facing the street. You heard something shuffle, like moving fabric around, before a familiar voice hit your ears.

“Who’s there?” they- he said, and you were about to cry out of relief when you heard it. “Omni-Man?”

~~~~~

“Cecil, why do you think Nolan would go after ________?”

“Why wouldn��t he?” Cecil didn’t look at Debbie, instead focusing on the map in front of him, wondering where Mark could’ve been.

“What reason would he have to go after them? I just- he wouldn’t just attack a child, would he?”

Cecil felt his head start to hurt. Goddamnit, why did Nolan want to go after you? You had nothing to do with anything, besides being Cecil’s daughter. … is that why he was after you? Just because you were related to Cecil?

No, Nolan wasn’t stupid. He knew you weren’t his biological daughter, Nolan knew Cecil took you from somewhere.

He probably thought you were just someone that he got for fun, which was the furthest from the truth. Cecil didn’t-

“Sir, we’ve found Mark Grayson, along with your daughter, not at the same locations, but-”

“Where is she?” Cecil didn’t try to hide his worry in his voice. It didn’t exactly help when the agent said, in a monotone voice, “She's with Omni-Man, sir.”

~~~~~

“________? What are you doing here?”

Peeking out from the bush, you saw Omni-Man walk up towards you and hold out his hand. You graciously took it, and helped yourself up. Even when you were standing at your full height, Omni-Man was way taller than you. Like, way taller. He could beat your dad within an inch of his life even with all of that combat stuff he learned over the years.

Of course he could, he’s Omni-Man dumbass. Ignoring the thought, you answered, “I’m, uh, busy.”

You saw him give a small smile. “You’re busy hiding in the bushes?”

“Yes.” you cursed internally for answering that so quickly like an idiot. You weren’t expecting him to let out a laugh. He continued while you stood there, confused as all hell.

Finally, he said, “You know, you’re a terrible liar.” You laughed along with him for a moment, before saying, “Yeah, I know.”

His face suddenly darkened, before he said, “So, why are you out here?”

The laughter in the air was gone now, only replaced by crushing silence as he waited for your answer. You felt yourself shrink under his scrutinizing gaze. He looked like he was judging you for just standing there. Well, he could’ve also been judging you because you were in a bush just 10 seconds earlier. After a few more seconds, you broke.

“C- Dad said to hide somewhere.”

“Aren’t you too old to be playing those games?”

“Yeah, I am, but apparently someone was gonna come and get me. He just said to get out of open space.”

You heard him mutter something under his breath, before he scratched the back of his head.

“Well, I can see why he would want that.”

“Really? Why?”

“A mob boss named Machine Head.” When you gave him a confused look, he elaborated, “Machine head was a guy who took down the new Guardians of the Globe along with… Mark. They thought they got him, but unfortunately they weren’t able to kill him.”

“How does that have anything with me?”

“... You’re Cecil’s daughter. Cecil was the one who found out about Machine Head. And took him down. Machine Head wants revenge against Cecil for ruining his plans, so he’s probably going to take it out on you.” When you still gave a surprised stare, he asked, “Do you really not have this happen often?”

“No, Dad keeps me inside alot…” your voice trailed off when you heard your phone ring, and picking it up, you saw it was your dad.

“Hello?”

“_________, I told you to get to somewhere safe!”

“I-I am! I’m with Nolan!”

“Hey, Cecil, don’t worry, I’m right here.” Nolan’s voice was filled with sarcasm, probably an old joke between the two. After all, they were both good friends to each other.

“No, you don’t understand, ______, listen to me-”

Suddenly you were grabbed by your arm, and dragged down. You were caught by Omni-Man before you hit the ground, though. Looking behind him, you saw two trucks coming towards you, along with multiple people in them, with weapons of all sorts.

You didn’t have time to ask who they were or what they wanted, as Omni-Man grabbed you and pulled out off the ground, and into the air. It took you a few moments, but you realized you were in the air. Flying.

Reaching for your phone in your pocket to call your dad back, you realized you must’ve dropped it. However, you weren’t about to waste your energy trying to get it back. Especially not when you were high above the ground. So you simply hung on for dear life as Omni-Man flew away from the shouting people in the cars.

~~~~~

“Where is she?”

“She went with Omni-Man, sir.”

Cecil stood there for a moment, wondering what the fuck happened. It was obvious now that Nolan had no intentions to harm you, but why would he take you and not tell you anything? Cecil wondered before something was handed to him. “We found this near where they took off, sir.”

It was your phone. Completely crushed to bits. “Omni-Man took it from her and crushed it without her knowledge, sir.”

“You started to shoot at her?! What the hell were you thinking!?”

The men stood there, completely still realizing their mistake. “We’re not kids playing at some game, this is real life. And now- I-” he really wanted to kill Nolan now. Debbie was going to become a widow, and he really didn’t care.

Walking up to the truck that was nearest to him, he opened the back and shuffled around, trying to find something, anything that would be of use.

Then he found his favorite gun. The only one he could actually hold himself without another person that stopped Omni-man.

Loading the ammunition, he walked over to Donald, who had a tablet in his hand. “Sir, we’ve found where they’re going.”

Looking at the area on the map, Cecil tapped his wrist watch, and said, “Good. Get the backup ready, and get Mark Grayson. Get Invincible.”

[piratefalls]

previous lists here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.

to keep a secret by itsmylifekay

Things are settling down after the lawsuit, but Eddie's new hobby isn't something Buck can get behind. He doesn't know how to get him help without sending the whole house of cards crashing down, so resolves to do it himself-- and in true Buck fashion winds up in the hospital for his efforts.

such stuff as dreams are made on by renecdote

Buck—in a move proving his maturity—sticks his tongue out at him. “You know, I’m pretty sure embarrassing dreams are supposed to be about your own embarrassment.”

“You think it wasn’t embarrassing for me?” Eddie says. “My husband couldn’t dance at our own wedding—I was mortified.”

Buck goes still. It was just a dream, he reminds himself, but something about the way Eddie says it—something about the expression on his face—

“Husband?”

"I guess it's been on my mind a lot lately."

Aka the proposal fic I didn't think I would ever write.

If You Need Me, You Know I’ll Be There by soft_satan

Eddie’s heart dropped to the bottom of his stomach. “Buck? What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“No,” Buck laughed, breathless and bitter, just on this side of hysterical. He sniffled again, sounding like he was trying to stop himself from crying. “C-could uh… could you come get me? Please?”

You can build a house, but not a home by justhockey

“I have walked through fire every single day of my life, because of you.”

Buck is so good at being a firefighter because he grew up inside a burning building, where one wrong move could send it all crashing down.

It’s hardly his fault that he got burned along the way.

* Or, five times Buck says how he feels, and the one time he doesn’t have to.

california wishing on these stars by hattalove

She’s been a roadblock for the longest time, a hard stop that cut off so many of Eddie’s thoughts halfway.

What if—but Buck’s with Taylor.

He could’ve sworn—but Buck’s with Taylor.

Sometimes he wonders—but Buck’s with Taylor.

And now he isn’t.

in which 'tis the season, buck is single again, and eddie is being very brave about it.

how easy it would be to show me how you feel by spinningincircles

After a while, Eddie nudges Buck’s shin under the table with his foot, motioning toward the stairs with his head.

“Come on,” he says. “You’re coming home with me.”

“You should really buy a guy dinner first, Eds.” Buck says, because he may be exhausted, but he can’t just let Eddie get away with saying things like that.

call you home by ashavahishta

"He’s like, so pretty sometimes I can’t believe he’s real?” He’d rambled once, so tired at the end of shift he was basically drunk with it.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Hen had said patiently, and patted him on the shoulder. “I like girls, remember?”

 “He’s built like a Greek god with the face of an angel,” Eddie had argued, a stubborn set to his mouth like he was determined for Hen to believe just how gorgeous his husband was. “Even you couldn’t resist that.”

Or: "Eddie Diaz drinks his 'I fucking love my husband' juice for 6,000 words." OR "5 Times Eddie Told The Firefam About Buck and 1 Time They Actually Met Him".

I get this feeling I’m in motion (a sudden sense of liberty) by anonymous

After Buck's breakup, Eddie decides he needs a night out to try and take his mind off things. But when Eddie shows up looking like that, well, one thing leads to another.

nothing left to lose but everything i have by thisissirius

SPOILERS FOR BUCK BEGINS.

“Defective parts,” and Eddie feels adrift, unable to parse Buck with the idea that he’s only ever been spare parts.

“That’s not on you,” Eddie says, because how could Buck think—

When Buck says, “I doubt they would agree,” Eddie wants to scream. Or find the Buckleys and tell them—

Buck’s everything.

you look wonderful tonight by lecornergirl

“Smells really good,” Eddie says, his first test of the night. Just a careful dip of his toes into the metaphorical waters of Evan Buckley’s potential praise kink.

The ripple effect is immediate.

Buck gets that look on his face again, like he’s trying to hide how much he likes it. He blushes, and he’s so goddamn pretty Eddie’s about to do something stupid, like march across the room and grab Buck and kiss his stupidly pretty face. The only thing stopping him is Christopher, who walks into the room at the perfect moment like they’d planned it.

a moment’s peace by iphigenias

"Honey, I'm home," he calls softly, toeing out of his boots and tucking them into the cubby by the door next to Buck's worn old trainers with the soles splitting away. He rounds the corner to the living room and feels the last five hours wash right off his back at the way Buck smiles at him from the shitty yellow couch they’ve been meaning to replace: tender and tired and easy, like it's no effort at all.

Maybe We Could Be Enough by ofloveandlonging

When the 118 is tasked with finding a lost child, something stirs deep inside Buck’s heart.

More than a thousand words by sugarandspace

It really shouldn’t have surprised Buck that Eddie prefers to keep Christopher’s pictures in a good old photo album instead of storing them on a hard drive or a cloud service. What does surprise him however, is the lack of Eddie in the pictures.

“Hard to be in the picture when you’re behind the camera,” Eddie explains like it’s not a big deal.

His words stay with Buck long after that conversation, and soon Buck and Christopher’s Super Secret Father’s Day Plan takes root. Eddie might have to spend the next year washing glitter out of his sheets, but it’s totally worth it.

in a car with a beautiful boy by outphan

"Buck crashed into his life, brighter than a meteorite, lighting up everything around Eddie. Life suddenly made sense. It made sense before, with Shannon and especially with Christopher, but it’s always been a little bit off-kilter, like someone forgot to remove the lens from the camera. Then Buck happened."

Chris has a birthday party to attend an hour and a half away. Buck volunteers to go with Eddie and by the time they get home, their life will have forever changed.

Think of a white horse by Phreakycat

Buck has the hiccups, the rest of the 118 have ideas, and Eddie (ultimately) has the solution.

good love grown by farfromthstars

“Hi,” Buck says, and Albert suddenly feels like an intruder even though he is the one who currently lives here, thank you very much. “Hi,” Eddie says back and yeah, he’s definitely never looked at Albert that way. Or anyone who isn’t Buck, as far as Albert can remember.

or

living with buck gives albert a front row view to whatever it is buck and eddie have got going on.

Your Name A Promise In My Mouth by kitkatpancakestack

She stood from her desk and hoped the expression on her face resembled something warm and trusting. She faltered a bit when the two men walked through, one brunette and the other blond, both huge and muscular and a bit intimidating. They were dressed in civilian clothes, both in denim, the blond with a LAFD sweatshirt and the brunette wearing a red and black flannel. She zeroed in on the gold wedding bands on their fingers, and took it as a good sign neither had taken there’s off in some show of passive-aggressive defiance.

"So," she said. "Let's start at the beginning."

* Buck and Eddie attend Couple's Therapy, told entirely through the therapist's POV.

beautiful lies by intotheblue

Buck has regrets. So many regrets. Most of them have to do with the way he isn’t touching Eddie’s biceps right now. He’s dressed like a walking wet dream, in a tight fitting maroon shirt whose buttons are fighting valiantly against Eddie’s broad chest.

“Jesus christ,” Buck mumbles.

“Hm?” Eddie says, turning to face him.

Buck feels his face flush. “Nothing! Just, uh, I thought you were trying to avoid attention at this party.”

Eddie winks at him. He winks. “I didn’t say that. I just need you to protect me from Winnie’s mom.”

[draw-back-your-bow]

Shoot Your Shot | C.K

My Masterlist | Request Guidelines | Send a Request

Pairing: Clark Kent x fem!reader

Request: “Hey! I just read “A little white lie” and I have to say it’s amazing! And I had a request! Can you do one where Clark Kent has a crush on you but like you don’t know and he gets jealous when you and Barry Allen hang out or make jokes because he thinks you guys like each other, but in reality you two are just friends. And it isn’t until like Kara points it out or teases him about his crush on you and you find out he has a crush on you, and in the end you guys get together!” | Requested by Anonymous

A/N: This fic is also taking place pre-COIE and pre-Superman & Lois (for obvious reasons). Therefore, it contains no spoilers for Superman & Lois (and COIE). Just so everyone knows, I’m going to stop mentioning if my Clark Kent fics contain spoilers after the season is finished. Also, I’m horrible at coming up with titles so please stick with me.

Summary: Clark wants nothing more than to ask you out, but he worries that a certain scarlet speedster may have beat him to it.

Warnings: Champagne consumption, a curse word, misunderstandings

Word Count: ~3.1k

▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣

Throwing your head back laughing, you lightly slapped Barry’s shoulder at the joke he made. He was grinning at his own cheekiness, and his pride in himself only made you laugh harder.

“Since when have you known so many dad jokes,” you wheezed, trying to catch your breath, “You’re not even a dad.”

The scarlet speedster next to you held his hands up in defense, “What can I say, they just come to me.”

You snorted, walking besides him into the cortex. You were both still in your superhero attire, having successfully finished defeating a meta-human criminal who was terrorizing the city.

Your and Supergirl’s teams had joined forces to stop a group of fugitives who were traveling throughout the multiverse. However, their base of operations seemed to be somewhere on Earth-1 or Earth-38, therefore making your collaboration necessary.

However, one thing was different about Supergirl’s team, it temporarily included the Girl of Steel’s cousin, Superman.

Of course, you didn’t mind the extra team member, especially one that wore a skintight suit that made sure each muscle got the attention it deserved.

Regardless of his superhero outfit, you were happy to be working with Clark. Maybe a little more than happy if you asked the butterflies in your stomach that fluttered whenever he was around.

Clark was everything any woman could ever dream of. You, Caitlin, Iris, Frost, and Allegra had reached a consensus on that. Although you hated to steal Felicity’s simile, Clark was like Barry in Oliver’s body.

While you were not romantically attracted to either man, you couldn’t deny that they both had characteristics, that if combined in the right way, would equal the perfect partner.

You didn’t want to jinx yourself, but from what you could tell, Clark was exactly that.

Exiting your daydream about the male Kryptonian, you shook your head, occupying your mind with thoughts other than your ‘coworker’. For instance, a random crack on the wall.

However, the universe seemed to have other plans because just as you started to forget, Kara called you over to where she and the man you were trying to avoid were studying footage on some monitors.

Straightening your posture, you left Barry’s side and made your way over to the super-cousins.

Standing next to Kara you cleared your throat before asking, “How can I help?”

Kara pointed to the monitor which was showing the security feed of the bank before the attack. She began explaining, “Before the fight, the alien was nowhere in the room-”

Kara’s voice faded into background noise as you zoned into Clark’s expression. His eyes were squinted, deeply focused on the video. And you couldn’t deny that him not sparing your arrival a glance, hurt.

For someone who was allegedly the embodiment of good, you felt like he was being awfully rude. But hey, you suppose he didn’t gain such a great reputation by getting distracted from catching the bad guys by his friend that admired his every move.

Brushing off Clark’s unacknowledgement, you zoned back into what Kara was saying.

“So it might be possible that their powers include some sort of invisibility or teleportation that might be hard to fight head-on, therefore making that the best plan.”

You nodded, not quite having heard everything she said. But knowing Kara, she was probably right.

“So, you agree?” Clark asked.

You sputtered, not knowing what exactly you agreed to. “Uh, yeah. Why not?”

Kara grinned, glancing between the two of you as you tried to control your accelerating heart rate. “Great! We can leave in a couple hours. I’ll go tell everyone else.”

Your eyes widened as she walked away. “Wait, what?” you stammered.

Clark nervously scratched the back of his neck before turning to you, “It’s okay if you don’t want to do this. Kara kind of cornered you with the idea. I’m sure we could figure something else out.”

You cut in, “Sorry but, what did I just agree to?”

Despite having super-hearing, Clark seemed to not have heard your question as he continued, “We don’t even have to act like we’re… together, we can just be friends, good friends.”

The dots started connecting in your mind as you figured out what exactly Kara suggested. Oh, no.

You had to pretend to be dating a guy you liked… a lot. This situation had a one in a million chance to happen, and you’re not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

Pro, you would get the chance to “date” the man of you and the rest of Earth-38’s dreams. Also, you would get to have at least one perfect evening with him in case things went sideways.

Con, “dating” you may cause him to realize how much he did not want to date you. It could also ruin the platonic relationship you both already have.

Another pro, if things did go wrong, he would go back to Earth-38, you would stay on Earth-1, and you could pretend like the whole thing never even happened.

Okay, 3-2. The pros outway the cons. So you made the logical decision and sputtered out, “No, I mean, yeah. I’m totally fine with doing it. We’re friends right? Great friends!”

Mentally hitting yourself, you winced at your lack of chill. You had to get that under control if you were going to pretend to be his girlfriend for whatever reason.

Now that you think more about how little you know about the situation, it’d probably be best if you asked Kara for another debrief on the mission.

Nevertheless, Clark nodded at your words, not seeming to mind your weirdness. “Okay,” he told you, “I’ll see you soon.”

Nodding at his words, you held back a wince until he left your line of sight. The second he was gone, you slapped your hands onto your face, “Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why must I act like I was born yesterday around him.”

From across the room, a voice piped up, “Yeah, that was hard to watch.”

Snapping your head up, you saw Cisco rolling around in a chair.

“Was it really that bad?” you groaned.

He nodded with a sympathetic frown on his face, “Yep. Like, ‘Barry trying to hide his alter-ego’, bad.”

You threw your head back in frustration. “Seriously?! How am I supposed to keep it together for an entire mission? I don’t even know what we’re doing! I zoned out the second Kara started explaining it to me.”

“Let me guess, you got lost in his mesmerizing eyes?”

You scoffed, crossing your arms defensively, “No… I didn’t, I swear.”

Cisco let out a noise of disbelief before continuing, “Well, you're gonna have to figure something out. It was painfully obvious that you’re like, in love with him.”

You playfully rolled your eyes, throwing a pen at him as you left the room.

“Ow!” He yelled, “You can’t deny the truth!”

▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣▣

After learning what exactly your mission entailed and getting dressed, you and Clark entered the doors to a gala. The type that neither of you had a high enough salary to get invited to.

But thanks to some light hacking done by Cisco, he was able to score an invitation. Though there was only one, so you had to go as Clark’s plus-one.

Picking up a flute of champagne from a waiter, you knocked it down, not minding the slight burn. Before you could place your glass down in exchange for another, Clark swiped the flute from you with furrowed eyebrows.

“You may want to slow down a bit, we may be here for a while until they decide to show.”

You hummed in acknowledgement rather than agreement before taking two more flutes from a passing tray, handing one to him.

“Well, I have to drink enough for the both of us since you can’t get drunk, Mister Liver of Steel.” you quipped, already starting to feel the alcohol loosen your tongue.

Of course, you didn’t plan on actually getting drunk. Just a little tipsy. That would be the only way you had a chance of surviving the night.

“Still,” Clark interjected. Taking your second glass just before you could feel the liquid stream down your throat, “I don’t think Barry would be very happy if I let you drink and fight.”

You rolled your eyes, “To be fair, there are a lot of very strict people on both our teams. Plus, I feel like Joe would have a more explosive reaction than Barry.”

Clark subconsciously tapped his fingers on his glass, taking a sip while he scanned the ball room. “Well, he sure does care a lot about you.”

You took your flute back from him in a silent agreement that you would take it slow.

“Barry or Joe?” you joked.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Clark send you a small glare, causing your lips to curl into a smile around the rim of your glass.

Before he answered the question, the communication system in your ear crackled to life.

“Testing, testing. 1, 2, 3.” Cisco checked.

You rolled your eyes at his antics and let out a quiet chuckle. Turning on your microphone, you addressed him, “Cisco, we use these same comms for every mission. You don’t have to test them each time.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever. Anyways guys, the multi-bandits aren’t-”

You interrupted him, turning to face Clark so it wouldn’t look like you were talking to yourself. “Multi-bandits?” you questioned, taking another sip of champagne to smother your laughter.

“Duh,” Cisco defended, “ ‘Cus you know, they’re thieves traveling through the multiverse.”

You and Clark shared a chuckle before he reassured the engineer, “Yeah, Cisco. We get it.”

You could almost sense Cisco beaming through the comms as he replied, “Obviously.”

“But anyways,” Cisco continued, “The bad guys aren’t gonna show at the gala. We picked up some Earth-46 vibrations in an abandoned factory a few miles outside the city. Kara and Barry are already headed there now, so you two can head back to Star Labs.”

You relaxed at the news. Now that the mission was over, you had successfully completed it without losing your chill over Clark.

The Kryptonian slowly nodded, processing the information before suggesting, “Maybe we should stay just in case something happens. Do you know if all the fugitives are in the factory?”

You gaped at his proposition, not knowing if you could make it through this entire event without letting your partner know of your infatuation with him.

“I’m sure they wouldn’t split up if they’re planning their next heist or something,” you argued.

Clark furrowed his eyebrows at your objection, “But if they’re not, some of them could still be planning to come here.”

Before you could open your mouth retortion, Cisco cut in, “The Man of Steel has a point, if they do decide to show, then I’d be best if you two stayed. I’ll update you both when Kara and Barry finish at the factory. Peace out.”

With that, the comms went silent and you sighed at your current predicament. You were so close to freedom, only for it to be snatched from your grasp.

Noticing your melancholy, Clark shifted on his feet trying to decide what he could say that would lift your spirits.

“I’m… I’m sorry for suggesting that we stay. I wasn’t thinking about how you may have wanted to go help Barry.”

You lifted an eyebrow at him giving him an incredulous look, “It’s not just Barry you know, Kara’s with him too.”

He shifted again, avoiding your eyes, “Yeah, I know. But, you know… you and him-”

You effectively cut him off, shushing him with your finger, “I’m just going to stop you right there and say that there is no me and Barry or Barry and I or… whatever. There’s no me and anybody. As in, I am completely single, one and only, lone wolf, you get the point.”

Your voice faded out as Clark nodded. Somewhere throughout your rant, his gaze locked onto your eyes, refusing to look elsewhere. You returned his stare, only breaking for your eyes to trace over his jawline before landing on his lips.

Pulling your hand away from his face, you cleared your throat, averting your eyes, “Uh, sorry. I got carried away. Anyways, I’m not with Barry, I’m not even interested in him like that.”

Under his breath, Clark repeated softly to himself, “You’re not interested in him.”

You nodded at his words. Your breath hitching when he offered you his hand.

“Dance with me?” he asked.

You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out. So instead you opted for a small nod, before grabbing his hand and swaying with him to the classical music.

After much mental debate, you took a chance and decided to lay your head on his chest. You felt his heart beating underneath the fabric of his suit, and thoughts of waking up on his bare chest crawled into your mind.

After a few seconds of hesitance at your decision, you relaxed on him, thankful that your plan didn’t backfire.

Swaying on the dancefloor, you and Clark melted into each other's arms. When being in a room filled with actual couples, your fantasy of being with Clark became a little more real.

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Returning your gown to the storage room of S.T.A.R. Labs, you turned off the lights before exiting into the hallway.

The night felt like a dream. If not for the rapid beating of your heart that still hadn’t calmed, you would have thought that you were running a fever and had hallucinated the entire evening.

You absently hummed to yourself, reliving the night in your head. You both had danced for what felt like hours. Then, when he noticed your feet getting tired, you conversed with other guests, keeping up the couple charade even when you both knew that it was no longer necessary.

Finally, leaving the party in limo so you’d both conform with other invitees, you rested against his shoulder the whole way back to the Lab. His arm wrapping around you halfway into the ride, pulling you closer to him.

Gleefully skipping down the hallway, your steps came to a halt when you heard voices around the corner.

“Clark!” You heard a female voice groan, Kara? “You can’t be serious. You both were swooning over each other the entire time but you didn’t even ask her?!”

“Kara!” Clark shushed, before exclaiming in a hushed voice, “Keep it down, someone may hear you. And it wasn’t even like that, we were just good friends enjoying each other’s company.”

You knew that you shouldn’t be eavesdropping on their conversation, especially when the use of super-hearing would be able to reveal your presence. But this involved you, so technically… it was completely alright.

“Sure, because you definitely talk about good friends nonstop and travel across the multiverse just to see them.”

Your heart raced inside of your chest at the notion that Clark traveled all this way just to spend time with you. You were pressed up against the wall, beaming at the news that Clark talked about you.

In your excitement, your buzzing legs bumped the wall, causing a noise to resonate throughout the hallway. The muffled whispers in the room came to a halt, and you brought your hands up to your face, knowing that you’d been caught.

Knowing that they could easily look through the walls to see the identity eavesdropper, you stumbled out from behind the corner, your eyes dancing around the room, refusing to meet their gaze.

“So…” you trailed off, bouncing on your heels, “I really enjoyed going undercover with you.”

Clark’s face was bright red, rivaling the appearance of a tomato. Kara’s reaction was similar to his, her having a flabbergasted expression painted across her face, surely thinking cliches like this only happened in movies.

The female Kryptonian rapidly glanced back and forth between the both of you, waiting to see what would happen next.

But before she could watch the next events unfold, Clark cleared his throat, “Uh, Kara… could we have the room?”

Kara hesitantly nodded, backing out the door. Now with Kara gone, it was just you, Clark, and the deafening silence that now engulfed the space.

Clark started with a shaky exhale, “I didn’t mean for you to hear all that. Really, I just got carried away, with my feelings, then I told Kara and they just… snowballed.”

He rubbed his hand over his face giving a muffled groan, and you awkwardly bounced on your heels while fiddling with your thumbs. You knew exactly what he was trying to say, because it was exactly how you felt.

“What I’ve been trying, and failing, to say is… will you go out on a date with me?” he blurted out.

Letting a grin spread onto your face, you frantically nodded before throwing your arms around him.

“Yes, I would love nothing more than to go on a date with you Clark!” you professed.

At your words, Clark beamed into the crook of your neck, enveloping your body with his wide frame.

Eventually pulling back from the hug, you both gave lopsided grins to one another, not quite believing that your dreams came true.

But as you both walked out of S.T.A.R. Labs, hand in hand, you knew that this was only the beginning of what would be a long life by each other’s sides.

▣▣▣▣▣ Thanks For Reading! ▣▣▣▣▣

[nachosncheeze]

Music of Blindspot

The music of Blindspot 2x09 - Why Let Cooler Pasture Deform

This is weeks delayed, but I'm just catching up on the rewatch, and the music for this episode especially is pretty intense so even though I did a brief 09/10 post before the holidays, I wanted to delve into it properly.

So at this point, I'm pretty much finished cataloguing tracks and the more interesting thing to me is looking at how thematic parallels etc are reflected in the music, across different parts of the series. I touched on that a bit in a couple of previous posts (2x06 and 2x08 spring to mind). My formatting is ever changing but for this week at least, I'm just going to call out the scenes I found most interesting to listen to and talk about them. Links will be sparing but there'll be at least a couple.

As always, all music is composed by Blake Neely and Sherri Chung; I’m getting nothing out of this except an excuse to re-watch with my own little auditory memory mini-game. Please don’t do anything shady with the YouTube links; I don’t want to get the OPs in trouble or we could lose access to this awesome content. Also note that linked music recycled from season 1 was released on an official soundtrack, which is still purchaseable on iTunes etc. And it's good to support the things we love! :D

Post is behind a cut, because it’s long and at this point, almost entirely spoilers. :D

~~~~~

When Roman brings Jane the gum - I mentioned in a previous post that the song associated with Roman and Jane/Remi, "Torn Apart", in its full original version from 2x01 and elsewhere is underpinned by "The Truth Can Save You" (affectionately known as the Jeller theme). Torn Apart is heard throughout this season (and at moments in later seasons) a LOT, and up to this point it's mostly when Jane's in situations where her loyalties conflict. In this scene (as in most of the ones in 2x06, when Jane is separate from the team on the Bradley Dynamics mission with Roman), the Jeller theme is missing from the mix, leaving only the new bits associated with Remi and Roman. She may have already called in the cavalry but musically at least, she's all there with her brother in that moment.

The Afghanistan sequence - I wrote about this in the short version I did before the holidays but I was tired and seriously rambling so I'm gonna try to summarize more succinctly. The music and melodies for this whole sequence are, near as I can tell, new. But I picked up on the vocals. Blake Neely (composer) said somewhere in an interview that the distorted/echoing vocals we keep hearing from the very first moment Jane's arm reaches from the bag in 1x01 are meant to represent the voice of the her true identity trying to break through from inside her.

I can't be sure if the singer here is the same as what we hear elsewhere (which I think was Sherri Chung, co-composer), but to restate from the previous post, here's what I found interesting: when Remi is begging Chris and Nigel to let her go because her presence puts them in danger, they've woven in vocals that sound similar to "the voice of her true identity trying to break through", but are not echoed or distorted. My inference being that throughout this whole sequence of Remi living with the Thorntons, what we're seeing is her real identity. She's seen her team (who in later dialogue she acknowledges were acting outside the law themselves) destroyed by the government, but she's still warm and smiling; not the cynical and embittered early-Sandstorm Remi we've previously seen in flashbacks. After seeing the village of innocents destroyed, though, the old vocals come back - echoed, distorted - as though her "true identity" has been smothered and put back in a box behind her rage (The specific moment you can hear the change is when she's telling Nigel that her country has lost its mind. Another point of note: After she tells Nigel that the drone strike on the village "wasn't a mistake," the music switches to Torn Apart for the rest of the scene, and it's that piece that's underpinning the return of the "distorted voice".)

When Jane and Roman are making their escape - As Jane's hijacking a car to get gunshot-victim-Roman out of there, we hear a version of one of my favorites (I don't know if it has an official title). This is the same music heard in 2x05 when Jane takes gunshot-victim-Allie on her shoulders to get her out of there. Suffice to say that at least as far as season 2 goes, this seems to be the official "Jane saving people who have been shot" theme. XD (It's also heard extremely prominently in 5x11 and I won't say what the situation is because I don't want to spoil anyone; but that's where I fell in love with this piece.)

[ak8shi]

FWB HQ Boys: In which you beat the player at his own game!

warnings: Time skip spoilers, mentions of sex(all characters are 18+), stupid people in love

a/n: I love one(1) libra man!! I love Atsumu’s character and the way he’s developed in hq and I think that this is a very probable way in which he finds love !! thank you all so much for loving the first installment so much <3 I-I went a little overboard with this one but ,, xoxo Chlo

━Miya Atsumu

Let’s start with a little background; I think we can all agree Atsumu is and always has been popular with the ladies

…But that doesn’t necessarily mean the ladies are popular with him LMAO

He’s truly the emotionally unavailable heartbreaker and he built himself quite a reputation without even knowing it

This dude doesn’t even really fuck around with girls, maybe a few meaningless flings his senior year but besides that, he only has eyes for one lady and her name begins with the letter V and ends with ball

LET’S GO

So you’ve known Atsumu for years unfortunately,,, and you surely know about how he treats the girls that approach him with confessions and boxes of chocolates

You don’t approve of it at all, but your family is practically family with the Miya’s and you’ve literally spent every major holiday with them since you can remember

You: Atsumu would it kill you to show some respect towards these women

Atsumu: If she breathes, she’s a thot

….smh… a fucking mess someone please put him in his place

However your mom was always happy that you could be around the twins since you were an only child, and she loved the idea of you having two brothers who would protect you from the evils of college men little did she know,,

You hate to admit it and we hate to see it, but you started to develop a crush on him your freshman year of high school.. you suppose it was because you spent so much time with him and you saw parts of him that a lot of people didn’t get to see I mean you also saw him with his jersey on and off pretty often how could you resist

For example, every Halloween you had a sleep-over tradition where you watched horror films after trick-or-treating and Atsumu was scared SHITLESS every year, I’m talking ripping your favorite blanket off you and burying his face in it to block out the movie, he would threaten you and Osamu about telling people at school about it

Him, a 17 year old teen standing in your doorway at 3:40 am: c-can I sleep on yer floor I LOVE HIM SKAKAKAJSW

You, filming him and sending it to Suna on snap: sure Atsumu <3

You found yourself entranced when he automatically gave you his school cardigan on the walks home from school when it was cold or raining, and completely enraptured by his cute little accent

Atsumu: did ya know yer a fuckin’ idiot bimbo stupid butt crack for not bringin’ yer jacket

Atsumu: yer lucky I’m a gentleman

You: ...

Osamu: god…..

It was naïve to think he would ever reciprocate feelings especially with his entire life being his volleyball career, and you convinced yourself it was a tiny high school crush and eventually you managed to repress it

Too much was on the line; you didn’t want to make both of your families awkward, and you needed to focus on your studies as one of the top students at Inarizaki yes ma’am

Besides you loved him like family right ???

RIGHT ???

The twins are a year older than you, and Atsumu had just signed to play professionally for MSBY!!

You at his official signing: wow, looks like you don’t have to resort to living on the streets after all

Him: yeah ❤️

You kind of forgot about how you felt about him since you weren’t seeing either of the twins consistently anymore with how busy both of you were; you stayed in contact, but nothing really serious

It was weird because you were still in high school while the boys were experiencing college and doing their own thing… you drifted apart honestly and you felt a bit awkward talking to them sometimes, you felt like you were bothering them Atsumu would probably tease you and say that you were

Another year passed and you were heading to college! You are living your best life, meeting new people, and then you got the text from your mom that you were doing Thanksgiving with the Miya’s,, you weren’t sure if that meant you would be seeing both twins but something about the possibility of seeing Atsumu again made something stir in your chest

Fall break hit and you found out both the twins and you were back at home since Atsumu also had a rare break from training and his regular professional season

You were helping Osamu out at his shop, since it was his first time dealing with the overflow of Thanksgiving season as a new business owner

You’re helping close the shop, when you hear the door jingle; you turn to say a polite “sorry we’re closed for the day,” but you’re met with what seems like a new and improved and muscular Atsumu OH NO

He looks amazing and so much older than you remember??? And he’s thinking the same thing about you!!! Like wow she’s changed a lot since she started college, I’ve missed a lot apparently ??

You immediately fall into his arms, inhaling his familiar scent, Osamu rolling his eyes at the two of you and telling you to get lost before he yaks

You leave the shop with Atsumu, inviting him to your house; as you enter, you catch your mom leaving to pick up some last-minute groceries for the Thanksgiving meal

She’s acts way happier to see Atsumu than she acted when you came home LMAO later she doesn’t shut up about how handsome and manly he’s become, but you just pull him away to your room and lock your door behind you

He goes to sit on your flower-patterned comforter from your childhood, newly washed thanks to your mother

Atsumu: so…. what’s up with you..?

You can’t control the churning of your stomach all of a sudden; you can’t remember him ever looking at you this way, like he’s looking at a woman

The feelings come rushing back, and literally all you can think about is kissing him

You lean back on your dresser in front of the bed, and a wave of need to express yourself washes over you,

“Atsumu, I missed you.”

You don’t even know what’s happening until you’re trapped in between Atsumu and the door, his mouth gently pressed against yours, his warm hands caressing your hips

He asks if this is okay, and all you can do is moan back a yes in response

Let’s just say your mom might need to clean your comforter again lmaoo

It’s complicated and you’re both kinda confused after… like no one admitted that they had feelings for the other and its not like either of you can just disappear from the other’s life like a random hook-up

BUT BOTH OF YOU ARE TOO STUPID AND STUBBORN TO REALIZE YOU LIKE EACH OTHER AND WANT A RELATIONSHIP I-

Like he’s literally cuddling you and kissing you and asking you about college in your childhood bedroom naked what

And it ISN’T uncomfortable at all

It feels so right to be in his arms, and you’re in disbelief about what happened??? What even like how have you gone all this time without doing anything honestly

You suddenly hear your dad pull into the garage, and you’re both up and putting your clothes on as fast as possible

It’s embarrassing when you look back on it, how long the hook-ups went on, but this was a common occurrence whenever the two of you were home

It was basically like you were dating and doing long-distance without the label

IT WENT ON FOR ALMOST A YEAR 🤡

Osamu during next year’s Thanksgiving meal: I think we should go around the table and say what we’re thankful for, I’ll go first. I’m thankful that two people at this table are getting laid despite the fact that I’m not 😊

Your parents:

Atsumu, in many ways, is oblivious to what his feelings mean after not really being in any real relationships and blocking out all the girls during high school,

He would find himself texting you after each of his matches, hoping you had watched him and his heart would flutter when you complimented him on his sets

Atsumu on the phone with you: yeah I’m just chillin’ with the boys rn 😏

Sakusa: get the fuck off my bed and get off the phone with your girlfriend so I can sleep

Atsumu: she’s not my girlfr-

Sakusa, talking loud enough for you to hear: I literally don’t care but don’t you have her picture saved as your lockscreen?

He tried to hook-up with someone when he was away playing a tournament in the summer, but it wasn’t the same and it was only good if he imagined it was you

He never did it again and before coming home for Christmas, he called Osamu to finally ask him what to do

Osamu: about time you meathead

Osamu literally spells it out to this man; he has been and is in love with you and he needs to do something about it asap before someone else snatched you away

Atsumu: why didn’t ya just say somethin’ ? Ya know I’m not good at these typa things !

I can’t he’s something else

So it’s Christmas, and he asks if you would want to go see the town square’s Christmas lights with him

Of course you say yes, you’re just really excited to finally see him after so long !!

Atsumu with rosy cheeks ugh spare me

He picks you up and greets you with a kiss to your temple, and he has a little gift baggie with him; he hands it to you to open and you pull out his old school cardigan

“I-I thought maybe you would want it since ya always stole it from me in high school, and since I’m half-way ‘round the world most of the time”

It smells just like him, you thank him with a kiss to his cheek and you tuck it away in your bedroom before leaving hand-in hand to see the colorful lights dazzling in the night sky

You talked to Osamu about your relationship with his brother and you want Atsumu to make a move honestly; you want to be sure he wants this since you’ve literally liked him since high school

You’re not sure what you are expecting, but when Atsumu has you in his arms, your back against his chest and his chin on your shoulder as you watch the Christmas carolers, you don’t expect him to whisper into your ear,

“hey, will ya be my girl?”

You turn around to give him a surprised look, his hand bringing yours to his mouth to plant a soft kiss on your knuckles this is his favorite place to kiss fight me

After getting over your dream-like shock, you say yes and pull him into a kiss

I’m crying he tells you afterwards that you were his girl since the first time he met you, we’ll let him have this one because did he really know until like a week ago? no

Whew, all of your friends and family let out a relieved sigh when they hear the news LMAO

Suna, hearing about Atsumu finally making it official: thank god I was about to start blackmailing him with those Halloween videos

[writingonesdreams]

Sortinghatchats - The Bold Type

Check out @sortinghatchats and @wisteria-lodge for explanation of the system. Spoilers ahead.

I get the impression Bold Type is a very lion centric show. Its characters are constantly looking for causes, for ways to make the world a better place, to find agendas and make a point through whatever means at their disposal.

Kat seems like the easiest to sort. She is bold, unapologetic, she runs against the door and any obstacle with a lion determination, and has to be alerted to her methods being inconsiderate or even painful for others. When she thinks something is right, she is going to speak up and rage against it, no matter the personal cost to herself. She gets fired from her beloved job because she wants to make a superior pay for supporting hate groups. She goes on a rampage promoting man nipples when Instagram forbids her from making pictures of women breasts. Becoming an activist in the later seasons also reflects this. A lion primary with a cause and with lion secondary ways in how she treats problems, barges through people, and responds to her emotions. Kat can't help but say exactly what she means and feels. Rather telling Adena she is attracted to other girls than keeping it secret to spare her feelings, telling Sutton exactly what she thinks about her safe high paying job that's boring as heck, beating a guy up who insults Adena during their date. A screaming improvising lion to boot. Though she does adopt some snake ways along the way, getting creative and using different angles to get out of tricky situation, like when she finds a way to fulfill her contract to Whole Spa by promoting their products on instagram while calling them out on being racist in the same video.

Jane is a bit harder to sort, since it's her methods that are the most obvious about her character. Jane makes lists of pros and cons. She makes meticulous research for her reporter job and she loves it. Relying on facts, checking over that everything fits, observing situations. Writing for her is a assemble of tools, ways to approach a topic right. She is a clear bird secondary. While all three girls are characteristics for putting their friendship above all else - from romantic interests to jobs - Jane is as much as an cause fighter as Kat. She looks for stories to help people, especially women. She writes her Failing Feminist vertical to help vulnerable women, to tell their stories, to bring down abusive bosses, to raise awareness. Obsessing over politics and higher meanings for her articles from the early season 1, when she starts to get comfortable and confident enough in her position and talent as a writer, she enjoys taking on the challenge of difficult topics. It fires her up. Loyalty and appreciation to Jacqueline, she sees as a mother figure nor to the magazine Scarlet itself that rised her up, stop her from going after more lucrative job for herself in Incite, not realizing how important team and work environment are. When she gets invested in a story, she won't let go just cause it's uncomfortable for her sources or even to people she loves, like Jacqueline. Her relationship with Ryan is based on attraction and similarities as writers, and she doesn't mind starting with sex only, but she breaks up with him the first time, because him hooking up with others girls (which was their mutual deal) doesn't match what she wants from a relationship, wanting loyalty and love for herself. They break up again in season 4, not because Ryan cheated on her, but because he couldn't fess up, when honesty and telling hard truths is Jane's motto and credo in life and she wants a person that values it the same. A lion bird from what I can see.

Sutton might be the hardest to sort. She doesn't have a cause to follow per se, she follows her dream job in fashion, which however counts for lions. It's a hard bumpy journey to decide to pursue it though, working her ass off to keep it and be promoted, to do what she does and loves best and then to find her way in it. Sutton almost doesn't let herself think about it, needing money, trying to be practical. But she is so sad about it. She stifles her own feelings and desires in order to survive in the society she can't rely on because of her drunk mom and hard childhood. When she does come into herself at the beginning of the first season, she thrives. She glows, sparkles, finds her confidence. While being plagued by insecurities if she is enough the whole series, she truly and beautifully shines when doing what she loves in fashion, when she goes after her goals. Sutton is independent, and breaks up with the love of her life, Richard, several times because he poses a risk to her career and reputation. She won't let him pay for her and help her just cause he is 15 years older wealthy suitor, which gets on his nerves. And she chooses to be always honest about her feelings no matter how uncomfortable they are to hear to him, like when she tells him she won't move with him to San Francisco, because of her promotion and she doesn't want kids, because she loves her life dedicated to her job as it is. Sutton isn't people driven, so neither snake or badger, so her cause could be considered her dream and love for fashion, a lion primary. But her secondary looks like a badger to me. Sutton is a charming. She can befriend anyone, put models at ease, call out bad behaviour with diplomatic nuance. To get Oliver's trust she works harder than anyone, looking for ways to help and please. Integrity and showing up are her get go ways to approach problems and challneges.

The lion primary all three share would explain how they get along so well. As mentioned before, no matter their causes or dreams, these friends put everything on the line for each other. They understand and support each other, because they just get where each is coming from, they are proud at each other's fights for the purpose, for improvement, and they call each other out on judgemental or emotional choices. Their bond even shows how strong friendships can be for lions - just cause they aren't loyalists doesn't mean they can't be dedicated and loving to each other, while going after their own things. It reminds me of what @nectargrapes said about lion love yesterday in her posts.

That's my reading, feel free to suggest or discuss any improvements to the sortings if I'm reading them wrong.

Kat - lion lion

Jane - lion bird

Sutton - lion badger

[tweedlydumbtweedlydoo]

Not Perfect (JJ Maybank x reader) pt. 2

Summary: JJ Maybank is the one who makes sure your kook lawn is immaculate. Your family may look perfect just like the lawn from someone looking from the outside in, but it turns out you and JJ have more in common than you thought.

Previous Part: Part 1 

!!warning: This story talks about abuse through out, so if that’s triggering please don’t read. This is strictly fiction.

A/N: Had not expected this to get as much attention as it did! I’m glad you all liked the first part :) Hope you enjoy the second xx 

Tag list is at the end. Let me know if you want to be added xx

**MASTERLIST**

Requests: {OPEN} CLOSED

I am currently taking requests for:

The Vampire Diaries/The Originals

Elijah Mikaelson

Damon Salvatore

Criminal Minds:

Spencer Reid

Derek Morgan

Supernatural (I’m only up to season 2, so please don’t request something with spoilers)**

Sam Winchester

Dean Winchester

Outer Banks (Netflix):

John B Routledge

JJ Maybank

Rafe Cameron

********************************************************************************************NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS

It was Thursday night, JJ’s night to work at the country club. He was clearing off a table when he saw your family walking in, dressed head to toe in fancy clothes. Multiple people greeted your father, shaking his hand. He was a well-known man around the island, just like the Cameron’s. Your family was up on the popular pole with the Cameron’s, fighting for the richest and best family on the island. He thought your two families were in a feud for power over the island, but he wasn’t sure.

He watched as your dad put his hand on your back, pulling you closer, so he could introduce you. Your body tensed up at the touch and he watched you force a smile and shake the other man’s hand. Your eyes darted around and met JJ’s. He blushed because you had caught him staring. You gave a genuine smile and a wave. He smiled and started to wave back but the look your dad gave him made him think otherwise. He hung his head and continued clearing off the table. Out of the corner of his eye he watched your dad grab your arm and pull you inside the club.

You weren’t sure if it was the shadow from the outside lights, but it looked like his eye was bruised. You were pulled from your thoughts when your dad guided you into the country club.

~

JJ had stepped out to clean off another table when he felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around he was surprised to see you.

“Hey.” You smiled.

“Hey.” He wipes his hand on the black rag and smiles at you.

“I didn’t know you worked here too?” You take a second to look over his features. His right eye was for sure bruised and there was a cut under his eye, looked like from a ring. It wasn’t a secret around the island that his dad was abusive. Everyone knew of it, but there wasn’t much for people to do, especially the kooks, so everyone minded their business. Especially, if it dealt with the people on the cut, also known as the pogues.  

He nods, “Yeah I alternate between helping Pope, here and then landscaping.”

“You’re just a man of many talents, aren’t you?”

“I guess you could say that.” He chuckles and you laugh in return. He knows you’re staring at his black eye. He’d come home from hanging out with the pogues and had a run in with his dad. He wasn’t too happy about JJ showing up and interrupting one of his shows.

“what’d you do, Maybank? Run into a pole?” You motion up to his eye.

“I-uh..” he chuckles, playing it off, “Yeah. Was messing around John B and he got me good.”

You nod. Someone with a mean right hook. You weren’t a stranger to those. “Well, he’s got a mean right hook.”

JJ nods, “Yeah…” He clears his throat, hoping to change the subject, and motions to your dress, “You look pretty.”

You blush, glancing down at your dress and then at him, “You think? I think I look like a lemon.”

“A very pretty lemon.” He adds. Both of you laugh and it quietly dies down. He contemplates asking you if you’ll be at the boneyard tomorrow, but he’s interrupted by your dad yet again.

“Y/n. Let’s go.” His eyes are sending daggers JJ’s way.

You and JJ turn around, “Okay. Just one more minute. I’ll meet you in car?”

Your dad shakes his head, “No. Now, young lady.”

You give a nod before turning around to JJ, giving him a soft smile, “I’ll see you in the morning?”

He nods, “Yeah of course.” He watches as you walk away from him once more. Even after you have walked by your dad, he’s still glaring at JJ and takes a sip from his drink before turning away and heading after you. What was this guy’s problem?

~

The next morning when he arrived at your house, he could hear you and your dad yelling inside the house but tried to ignore it. It wasn’t his business. He heard the door slam closed and looked up from the lawn mower. You stormed out of the house and across the lawn, your dad now outside as well, “Y/n, you get back here right now!”

You ignored him and got into your car, your dad following close, but you had already closed and locked the door.

JJ flinched when he watched your dad bang on your window, “Don’t you dare leave!”

You started the car and pulled away as quickly as you could, leaving your dad standing in the dust. When your dad turned around, JJ was staring from the lawn mower, “What are you looking at, boy?! Get back to work!”

JJ quickly nodded, “Yes, sir.” He turned around and started the mower as your dad stormed back inside.

~

“There’s the perfect kook.” Kie rolled her eyes.

JJ turned around to see you had arrived, heading to the keg. You hugged a few girls and a couple of the guys, grabbing a drink from one of the guys and chugging it.

“Damn.” John B says, noticing. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her drink.”

JJ glances at John B then back at you, “I haven’t either.” You were the good girl, the one who didn’t drink or do drugs. You came and hung out at the Boneyard, had fun but never engaged in such activities. He decided then and there, he’d keep an eye on you, and it’s a good thing he did.

Usually, he wasn’t one to get into people’s business, especially kook business, but the way your demeanor was around your dad, it mirrored his own and his mind wondered if there was something more behind your perfect family. The perfect family and perfect life he wanted but would never have. You didn’t live like him though, did your dad really do the same thing his shitty pogue father did to him? No, there’s no way. Your life was perfect. Your life was one he’d never have, you had a family he’d never have, a loving father that he didn’t have or never would have. He was jealous of your perfect life, so why did he feel the need to protect you?

~

Two hours later, you are upside down on the keg as people yell “Chug! Chug! Chug!”

“Dude… she just beat the record.” Pope says, eyes wide, “And she’s never drank before.”

Taking a sip of his red solo cup he watches you get down, throwing your hands in the air as people cheer around you. This wasn’t you, but who was he to judge?

He watched from a far. He’d kept a watchful eye on you all night, ready to step in if something went wrong. You were dancing with a few girls and a guy, who had his hands all over you. You were stumbling and he knew it was time to step in, especially once the guy started to lead you toward the woods.

“Hey hey!” He hurried after you and the guy, “No you don’t.” He grabs the guy by the shoulders, making him face JJ, “What the hell are you doing?”

The guy looked at JJ, “Dude, what are you doing? Back off! She’s the one who wanted to go back here.”

JJ looks at your figure, the guys practically holding you up as you sway, “Yeah, I doubt that. Fuck off before I beat your ass.”

The guy rolls his eyes, dropping his hands, “Whatever.”

JJ catches you as you start to fall, “Alright… I think it’s time to head home.” He picks you up bridal style and heads toward the pogues.

“hey! You’re JJ!” You giggle.

JJ can’t help but laugh and nods, “Yeah I am. And you’re y/n y/l/n.”

You giggle again, “My daddy doesn’t like you.”

He looks down at you but is interrupted by Kie. Is that why your dad was always staring at him, giving him evil eyes?

“She okay?” Kie asks standing.

JJ nods, “Some guy was trying to head to the woods with her. I’m going to take her to the Chateau, she’s plastered.”

John B nods, handing him the keys, “We’ll be back soon.”

JJ carries you to the van and lays you down in the back as you mumble incoherently about needing to be a good perfect girl. You can’t do no wrong. You have to be perfect. Before he could close the door, you leaned out of the van and vomited, before falling back into the van.

“Lovely.” JJ mumbles, scrunching up his nose in disgust. You had luckily missed his feet but had managed to get some on your shirt. Sighing, he closes the door to the van.

~

When he arrives at the chateau, he picks you up bridal style and carries you inside. He thought you had passed out, but your head swung forward, looking up at him, “Why do people think my family is so perfect?” You slur.

JJ gently sets you on his spare bed, “Because you guys are perfect. Your house and yard are always clean. You guys are always a happy little family.” He grabs one of his t shirts, “I need to change you, you’ve got vomit all over your shirt.”

You nod, but then shake your head, swaying back and forth on the bed, “They wouldn’t think we’re perfect if they knew the truth….”

He carefully helps you out of your dirty one and then the clean one over your head, “Oh yeah?” He’s letting you ramble on as he grabs the trashcan and sets it by the bed. He’s taken back by your next statement. Your voice was slurred and mumbling but he heard you perfectly, loud and clear.

“If they only knew what Mr. y/l/n does to his daughter behind closed doors.”

When he looks up at you, you’re passed out on the bed. What he does to his daughter behind closed doors? Is that what he thinks it means? He gently picks up your legs and tucks you into the bed, leaving a glass of water by the bed. As he steps out of the room, he turns around to see your sleeping figure on the bed, suddenly looking so small in his spare bed. You’re a kook, a part of this perfect family, living in a perfect house, on the perfect side of the island, yet you’re living a life just like he is?

Obx taglist:  @emmalvei-blog​ , @tregua-oca​ , @weirdbiwitch​ , @losers-club6​ , @treestarrrrrrrr​​ , @omgwhattheeven​ , @normatural​​ , @lreincarnationl​​ , @laurenron​ , @junkiemuppettxx​ , @beth-winchester21​ , @divcrdown​ , @timotaychalabae​ , @moose-squirrel-asstiel​ , @tangledinsparkles​ , @prejudic3​ , @lanarichards5  @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch​ , @fratboystark​ , @nas-marie-loves-u​ , @sunwardsss , @annedub​ , @jellyfishbeansontoast​ , @turtlee-says-rawr​, @fanficscuziranout​ , @summer-clouds-and-long-days​ , @write-from-the-heart​ , @louisolos , @summer-clouds-and-long-days​ @outrbank​ , @sunset-d-rive , @family-buisnes​ , @traumaflavouredjuulpod , @http-cherries​ , @k-k0129​ , @mileven-reddie​ , @eclecticpuppyhollywoodhumanoid​ , @cinnamon-roll-seth​ , @teamnick​ , @rockyyc77​ , @ellojustafangirlhere​ , @sataninsatin​ , @lordsagittarius​ , @helplessquotess​ , @katerosexx​ , @kiarasgold​ , @thee-sex​ , @sunshinemadds​ , @ceruleanjj​ , @nikki082489​ , @ilovejjmaybank​ 

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*If your name is crossed out then tumblr is being stupid and won’t let me tag you :(

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[shimmershae]

Some, okay a lot, of pre-mid season (tri? season) finale thoughts.  As if you actually asked for them, lol.

And no, I haven’t actually watched the last episode yet.  I’ve been putting it off all morning.  For reasons.  Reasons that I felt the inexplicable need to put on paper, er, screen.  

If you care at all to read the purging of my fatigued TWD fangirl mind, please look beneath the cut.  Fair warning.  It’s long so pull up a chair maybe, lol.  

I’ll admit it.  The spoilers indicating a significant lack of Carol/Melissa content has dampened much of my enthusiasm and there wasn’t all that much to start with.  

Let me tell you why--

The season, so far, has been woefully unbalanced in favor of the Reaper storyline and the Maggie/Negan conflict (which ties back to the Reaper storyline by the flimsiest of strings) and I’m just not invested.  

Why?  

Well, it’s multifold.  

#1 reason why?  Having a third of the last season ever of TWD devoted to going inside “the lions’ den” of villains I have no emotional connection to or curiosity about is a big fat fail.  

You might say “but there’s the Daryl double agent” aspect and I say “so fucking what” because it was so poorly conceived and has felt like such a WTF set of fraying puppet strings for this plot Angela was apparently jonesing to tell from the GO, damn the torpedoes she had to know where inevitably coming her way.  

Seriously.  I had talked myself into accepting that which I could not change, citing Daryl’s emotional brokenness after Rick.  Convincing myself he’d lost his anchor to goodness and hope and fulfillment in his years of self-imposed exile from Carol and what was left of his family and to a certain extent?  I can still by that explanation.  But really.  It’s the Leah of it all.  

Let me attempt to explain.  

To do that, maybe I should detail how I’ve always perceived Daryl.  

Daryl, IMHO, began this journey with us and the rest of Team Family with a figurative fortress erected around his true, core self.  

He was prickly.  Defensive to any overtures of kindness because he inherently did not trust them.  Loathe to form any real connection to anyone other than Merle, his blood.  

Daryl balked at the possibility of emotional connection and flinched in learned fear from physical touch.  

He did not recognize or accept affection or respect at face value because it was something rarely shown to him before.  

Anybody else remember that childhood abuse book from Consumed?  You know.  One of those first times the showrunners/writers dumped a character nugget in our laps and left it to us to do all the backstory in our own imaginations so they didn’t have to enrich their own characters beyond the scratch and sniff, wham bam this is who they are work?  

Anyway.  We were left to extrapolate from that what most of us h ad already suspected--that Daryl’s formative years were already a living hell before the ZA ever happened.  

So he was standoffish.  He didn’t form emotional connections lightly and physical intimacy was something light years out of his comfort zone.  

Until Carol.  

Daryl’s defenses started to crumble from the very start with Carol because she piqued his interest.  He looked at her, watched her withstand Ed’s abuse, and recognized something of himself.  

Against his will, Daryl started to care and when Carol lost the one good thing that had come out of her miserable life with Ed--Sophia--Daryl’s core identity started to be revealed to us and probably?  To himself after burying it so deep for so long.  

Long story short?  Daryl connected with Carol pretty quickly on a base level through the trauma of Sophia’s loss.  

The real connection, the emotional work it too to peel all those protective layers away took more like--like planting a flower from seed and tending it to help it survive and flourish.  

Simply said?  The work was put in and Daryl bloomed with Carol’s (and Team Family’s) care.  They all put in varying degrees of work but Carol planted the seed of his “belonging.”  

And the thing about Daryl?  Once he bloomed?  He grew strong.  He stretched toward the sun.  

He and Carol essentially bloomed and fought their way toward the sunlight together.  

And little by little, Daryl learned to accept the kindness, trust, and love he always deserved.  

From that newly confident man emerged a Daryl not so fearful of forming connections and none have ever been more powerful than his connection to Carol.  

I’ll spare ya’ll the paragraphs of how Daryl and Carol gravitated toward each other like magnets no matter the means of separation.  

I’ll just spell it out like this:  their bond supersedes all others, even Daryl’s bond with Rick.  And with Daryl only accepting affection from those he trusts implicitly, Carol and Daryl have been the only potential “romantic” pairing that has ever fully made sense for his established character.  

At least the character before Angela launched the grenade of Leah into the mix.  

Leah was a fail from the start.  

And you know what?  I’m thinking that was largely intended (for various reasons) but I still think they could have shown Daryl as receptive to having a “romantic” relationship to those willfully blind to the possibility that he’s actually been in a “romantic” relationship with Carol since Season 2.  Never mind that Carol and Daryl haven’t (yet) crossed certain physical boundaries yet.  Emotionally? They are already there even if neither is able to admit it out loud with the actual words yet.  But I digress.  The people that never wanted to “see” Carol and Daryl as “romantic” because they couldn’t fathom Daryl as seeing Carol in that light had already deemed that Daryl just didn’t feel that way about her, that maybe he didn’t feel that way about anybody (if they couldn’t have their way and have him feel that way about their preferred choice for him, they preferred him alone), and Angela wanted to show them differently.  To show them the light.  

That said, if Angela was so hellbent on doing Leah?  There were a multitude of better ways.  

Here.  I’ll give you one of them.  

Daryl isolates himself from his family after Rick’s “death” same as he did in Angela’s version.  

Carol’s been being pulled more and more to the Kingdom because Henry’s needing a mother figure is like catnip to her hurting natural-born, hurting Mama’s heart.  So Daryl’s anchor to the man he’d matured into, the one with all these earned emotional attachments, is reeled back in, little by little, leaving him unmoored.  

Dog literally runs into him just as before.  It hardly makes sense given how young and floppy and uncoordinated puppies are and thus vulnerable to danger, but this is the least of things we need to worry about suspending disbelief for right?  ;)

Dog and Daryl continue to have these run ins until Daryl decides to retrace the puppy’s clumsy trail and viola!  He finds Leah’s cabin and Leah inside.  She levels the same shotgun at him, they have a standoff, until---

Leah suddenly lowers the gun and incredulously says Daryl’s name.  

That’s right.  One simple change and Daryl and Leah have an undefined past already.  

Daryl doesn’t completely let his guard down because he’s Daryl, but he relaxes enough that we see he doesn’t immediately regard Leah as dangerious to his own well-being.  

From that point on, instead of tying Daryl up and threatening him, we could have been told the story of how they knew each other from before.  

My version goes a little something like this--

Daryl met Leah through Merle.  Merle, in turn, met Leah through the military before he got discharged.  He and Leah had an ongoing “I scratch your itch if you scratch mine” thing and Leah?  Well, she always had a bit of a soft spot/interest in Daryl that Daryl never really returned.  

The thing is, though?  With losing the chosen brother that filled the hole left behind by his lost blood brother Merle and losing Carol to her chasing after a chance of a new family (because she feels Daryl’s out of her reach too, our too blind and stupidly, silently in love idiots)?  Daryl finds himself embracing the shared memories however minimal of that brief past and his grief and loneliness leave him receptive to Leah’s eventual advances in ways he never was before.  

We’re still given hints of their unfolding relationship and we still don’t like it, but it makes more sense for Daryl to cling to the past when he feels he’s lost his future.  

Leah still gives her ultimatum (there’s a reason she gravitated toward Merle in perhaps his most toxic state, she’s more than a little fucked up too) and it’s not as much of a hard sell that Daryl might be pulled in Leah’s direction when he feels Carol is all but lost to him.  

Hell.  They could have even explicitly discussed Carol.  But wait!  Angela would have never allowed that because she doesn’t want to shatter all the crackship dreams in one fell swoop.  

But the story from that point on could have continued just as it has and probably I still wouldn’t have liked it but I could have at least bought it somewhat and understood it.  

Obviously, it didn’t. 

I don’t buy the Leah of it all.  Angela built that “relationship” with monopoly money and it shows.  

Because I don’t buy Leah period.  I don’t buy Daryl giving even giving a shit about trying to or feeling like there’s a snowball’s chance to redeem her so I’m not engaged whatsoever with this Daryl double agent story and him even givign her crumbs about his real family.  

That part rings false.  

So that’s a big problem right there and we haven’t even gotten to the other part I don’t buy.  

You know what else I don’t buy?  

#2?  

Why the hell are the Reapers so bloodthirsty for Maggie’s departure from this mortal coil?  

Without giving better reasoning than they’re just cray-cray, the entire faceplants and considering it’s taken up about 70% of 11A’s focus?  I’m pissed.  

Because, IMHO, they should go big or go home on this to give it any entertainment value because it’s all stale, recycled air if not.  

Maggie’s been established as a much darker character this season.  Which led me to believer the Reapers probably had a legit beef against her, but it seems Angela is reluctant to go all that way down the rabbit hole and doesn’t want to commit to what could be a more entertaining and potentially fascinating story than just Maggie’s in the right, the Reapers are just evil.  

Maggie is right about Negan, IMHO, but she’s also wrong in not listening to him when what he’s saying reeks of simple common sense.  Ignoring sage advice makes her seem more like an angry toddler stamping her feet in defiance than the leader they are so bound and determined to tell us she is.  

You know what?  The window for me to give more than the half a fuck I’m giving right now as they beat this dead horse to dust closed when Maggie decided letting Negan rot in the ASZ jail cell was enough and spared him when she finally had her best chance to end him once and for all.  

Maybe if they stopped having the same damn conversation and they didn’t take up 20% of the screen time left after the boring Reapers/Leah shit, I would be less resentful but I’m not and again, I’ll tell you why.  

BECAUSE.  We are in the last season of the OG TWD ever and this show has chosen to waste screen time on stories nobody cares about to the exclusion of the ones we’re yearning for more of.  

Like ASZ.  We’ve barely seen more than an hour of the eight hours devoted to Carol, Aaron, Rosita, Lydia, Judith, Kelly, Jerry and Co. in total.  Especially since they’ve been trying to establish the Commonwealth on the side, too.  

I mean, I never really expected to dig the Commonwealth so my expectations for it were lower than low so they’ve been exceeded at a miniscule level.  But I expected and hoped for ASZ and those characters we’ve cared the most about to receive much more emphasis and the fact that they haven’t in this last season so far has been the biggest FAIL.  

And okay.  Selfishly, I want more Carol.  She’s like salt.  She makes almost everything go down better.  

But really. Give me more of all the characters we actually care about, please.  The Reapers and the offshoots from that story wheel aren’t it.  I love Daryl but I hate this retread story for him.  Leah is a weak point that pressed upon?  Makes this weak ass arc collapse.  Maggie and Negan are giving us nothing new.  They are the definition of the word STALEMATE and that’s not what you want or need on the finale season of a show.  

Yes, I have enjoyed the majority of the episodes overall, but that was because the moments I loved I weighted more than the ones I didn’t and know they have the most impact on the show down the road.  

Probably 11A will fare better when all is said and done and the show can be binged but standalone?  It’s been an overall disappointment and that saddens me more than I can say.  

Anyway.  I’m going to stop rambling now and try to psyche myself up for episode 8.  I’ll be back with thoughts on it later, maybe.  

Sorry for the word vomit, but I felt maybe I could in someway give voice to some of the feelings floating around out there and let you know that you are not alone.  

Until later, lovelies.  

[always-on-tatooine]

A MaulxReader part 1: Shooting Stars

Woo-wee! First time posting something like this. I’m still a little new to Tumblr, so if I need to fix something please let me know.

Also, big shout out to @justalittlecloud and @a-dorin for being so kind and giving me courage to post this :)

Masterlist link: https://always-on-tatooine.tumblr.com/post/640968824459526144/shooting-stars-maulxreader-masterlist

1454 word count.

Takes place RIGHT at the end of Clone Wars, so spoilers may be present. Enjoy!

Released from the Jedi's grasp, and the orbital pull of the moon that drew closer to the condemned ship by the second; the now-former Darth Maul believed he had finally made his escape inside the stolen shuttle. After his battle with Ahsoka Tano on Mandalore, and the amount of force that was used to destroy the ship's engines, the Zabrak knew he would have to find somewhere to rest if he were to regain his strength. With the fall of the republic, the new order, designed by his former master would now have complete control over the galaxy. This would be a new challenge he would have to survive if he were to exact his revenge.

            Sending his spacecraft into hyperdrive, he was certain of his freedom from the chaos he created. Though he rarely underestimated his opponents, he did however neglect to calculate how much damage he had caused to the main ship. As metal and debris scattered across space, not even a Sith as skilled as Maul could avoid what happened next. A large chunk of metal shrapnel carved straight into the shuttle engine. A light show of emergency signals illuminated the cockpit. Frantically, Maul did his best to take control of the craft as it dropped out of its attempt of hyperspace. With his ship now spinning through space, it became clear to him that there was very little he could do to stop his fate as Maul lunged towards the nearby planet. The only hope for him now was to land his ship as smoothly as he could.

                                                        **********

            The night sky was brightened by a series of explosions over (y/n)’s planet. Though it was hard to see whether it was Republic or a Separatist ship from this distance, only a large warship would have been able to ignite the bright colors that followed as it fell out of hyperdrive. Though the destruction was being pulled into the gravitational force of one of the nearby moons, plenty of the explosion made its way to its neighboring planet. Parts of the chaos could be seen flying through the atmosphere. Like shooting stars, some of the metal debris burned even brighter they came colliding with the planet's surface.

            For (y/n), this was a nice addition to the already beautiful night sky that spanned over the great plains. As of late, she had been struggling to get a good night's rest. Something in the air had been unsettling, an unexplained shift that kept her up in the late hours. So, a beautiful occurrence like this was a nice accompaniment to what was already a restless evening. Most of the time it was fairly quiet in these parts, as their planet often orbited away from the happenings of the waring galaxy beyond. She watched as bits of the destruction above burned up in the atmosphere, cascading down like brightly lit shooting stars. (Y/n) made herself comfortable petting the little loth-cat that sat on her windowsill, which served as an observatory to the arial spectacle. For years now, the two had been living alone in their small hut, one of the very few that have been scattered out across this open valley. With no neighbors in sight, (y/n) used her space to spread out her farm as far as she saw fit, making it just big enough that she could tend to it herself. The closest town from here was an hour or so ride on her jump speeder; longer when carrying her cart of produce to sell to the locals. This arrangement made her a decent living. Sure, it was lonely out here, but it was the price she had paid to ensure her freedom.

One of the “shooting stars” looked especially bright as it encountered the atmosphere. At first just a shimmer in the sky, only slightly more distinct than the shimmering stars above. As it fell, it emanated bright colors of fiery reds and burning yellows. A beautiful spectacle, the burning ball appeared to grow brighter by the second… and closer.

            Once (y/n) finally realized this piece of sharp metal was not burning up in the atmosphere, but rather was coming straight for her home, she only had a mere few seconds to prepare for impact. Grabbing her little loth-cat she slid under one of the counters in her home and braced for impact.

            The planet shook, sending vibrations throughout the house, threatening to knock everything in her home about. Holding the scared ball of fur tight, it took (y/n) a moment to loosen her grip and take in the damage. Things in the house did in fact become shuffled about. A few things knocked off shelves and the lighter of her furniture push aside. It added a slight atmosphere of disaster to her usually cozy home. When the trimmers were finished (y/n) shot to her feet. The crash did not feel too far away, and if the impact had destroyed her crop then she would certainly be damned for the growing season. In a rapped fashion, she slipped on her shoes, grabbed her staff, and went outside to investigate the damage that had been gifted by the heavens above.

            As the smoke cleared, she could see to her relief, the plummeting debris did not destroy her season’s hard work. The damage ended about 30 meters outside the small field of crops. With the dust settling more, it became clear to (y/n) that this was not just a simply discarded part of a ship. A space shuttle, fuming from the flames now sat in front of the young women, a distinguishable new addition to the dark and open landscape. At closer inspection, she could see a silhouette of a body sitting in the cockpit. Quick to act, she knew that if this person were still alive, it would not be much longer until the smoke from the flames would ensure that there were no survivors in this crash.

            The heat coming from the shuttle was more than hot enough to tell her that touching the ship would possibly lead to burning off her entire hands. With some very precise shimming between the latch of the capsule and the windshield, she manages to leverage her staff and release the seal, getting fresh air to the perhaps deceased driver. A distinguishable pop, followed by a rolling hiss, smoke released from the opening, creating a large burst into the air, only to dissipate, leaving the body hunched over the wheel, barely breathing.

            (Y/n) had never seen a Zabrak before. She had only heard of them in stories; horned beings with bright skin that was vibrant as they were fierce. Yet in that moment, legends became true, falling from the sky from a heap of fire. He became even more real, as (y/r) reached into the ship to drag out the single survivor. Heavy, she did her best to lift the creature from his confines. She draped the muscled body over her back as she used all her might to bring the unconscious man back to her small home, the sound of metal scraping the rough terrain as his legs dragged in the back.

            Attempts to lay the man down on the couch in a way that secured his safety was limited, as the heap of dead weight slinked from her body and onto the limited resting space. In the dim light of her small hut, she was able to see more features of her unexpected guest. Under the mix of ash and buses, bright crimson skin painted over his face; a contorted expression from the pain he was enduring. Dressed in black, his agile body clumped onto the couch was misleading to its muscular strength; only known to (y/n) after carrying the stranger from the ship aflame.

            Her furry companion, still hiding under the counter, peering out, just to let out her hisses and groans of distrust. “Zuzu, you behave now,” (y/n) said scolding yet oh-so casually. “I had to do all the heavy lifting, so you don’t get to say who we have as a guest.”

            The one-way conversation continued as she reached for the med-kit, “What else was I supposed to do? Any longer in there, and he would have been done for.” Due to the limited lantern lighting, she was only able to apply bacta cream to the most evident of wounds. “This will have to do for now,” she proclaimed, looking over the depleted horned being. “Anything else that needs to be examined will have to wait till tomorrow.” After coving the stranger’s body with a spare blanket, she swept up the still cautious Zuzu, carrying her small companion off to the bedroom for rest.

[starring-movies]

Killing Eve: Episode Analysis

*SPOILERS*

Season 3, Episode 8 - Are You Leading or Am I? [Part 2]

We then see the switch from ‘Oksana’ to ‘Villanelle’, when Rhian comes to tell her that Hélène wants to see her. Villanelle watches longingly as Eve leaves, but when she turns around her expression suddenly changes and she puts her act back on. She tells Rhian that if she wanted to dance she would “just have to ask”, and then as a power play, she proceeds to dip her.

We continue to the next scene, where Villanelle’s in the Tube station and trying to provoke Rhian into fighting her - so that when she kills Rhian to protect herself and Eve, she has an excuse for killing her). Rhian tells Villanelle that “autonomy is overrated, sheep are happier than wolves”; which is exactly how Villanelle was when we first met her in Season 1, if someone had told Villanelle to “jump” she’d “just jump”. But we can see how far Villanelle has come since then, as now she recognises that she was a “sheep” and is trying to break out from that.

Villanelle then attacks Rhian, after annoying her enough to get a reaction out of her, and the scene is shot in the same way as the choking of the girl in the Amsterdam nightclub from S2E4. Just as in the scene in S2E4, Villanelle is fighting from pure emotion and vulnerability - more like Oksana than Villanelle - because she’s trying to protect herself and Eve. Both the Amsterdam club scene and this fight with Rhian are messy, hands on fights. This is unlike when she’s doing kills with the Villanelle persona fully up; where her kills are, like she says in S2E3, “nice and clean, just like you [Konstantin] taught me”.

As Villanelle is leaving the Tube station, a song last called ‘Get out of Town’ by Fireflies is used in S3E5 is played over the scene. The lyrics are:

“Nothing matters if you bury it deep,

Take away the worry,

What’s left, you keep,

Never say you’re sorry,

If what you mean is,

Do what you do,

And I won’t hate you somehow”

In the same way as the lyrics of the song suggest, Villanelle is visibly distraught at having to kill Rhian, but has to “bury it deep” in order to protect herself and Eve from Hélène and The Twelve.

A funny but subtle moment that’s what makes Killing Eve special - Carolyn’s unmatched pettiness of doing the unnecessary action of putting her glasses on to then read a blank page, after Geraldine has read her letter to her.

In the next scene, we continue as we see Eve go into the betting shop, ‘Bridgeway Bets’, to cash-in the betting slip which was given to to her by Villanelle, at the dance hall. Amusingly, Eve clearly needs to work on her fieldwork skills of bribery and persuasion. She uses the same technique, as she did with The Ghost in S2E4, of pretending to drop some money on the floor and offering it. However, now the monetary value of the note which she ‘drops’, has gone up from a £10 (The Ghost) to a £20 (now) - the increase of the value of the money Eve offers, shows how Villanelle is more important to Eve than The Ghost; and also how the stakes are much higher in this situation than they were with The Ghost.

It turns out that Konstantin’s betting slip gave access to a package, containing a set of Matryoshka dolls (aka Russian dolls), which has a barcode giving access to another safety box containing emergency supplies. Matryoshka dolls are traditionally used as a symbol of family and, more specifically, of mother and child. Although Villanelle didn’t know that Konstantin’s betting slip accessed a package with Matryoshka dolls in it, her decision to pass on to Eve the task of retrieving it, is a symbolic one for their relationship - representing how, through the exchange of the betting slip, Villanelle is not only passing on the importance of her freedom to Eve, but also the mantle of becoming her only family. At Paul’s house, Villanelle lets Konstantin leave with the dolls, and without her, because she’s realised that he’s “not family”; but she stays to be with Eve, because Eve is now her ‘Matryoshka doll’.

When Villanelle goes to the Bitter Pill office, she has changed outfits and is now wearing a mustard yellow coat. Mustard yellow has been used throughout Season 3, as a colour to represent family. It was the colour of the ‘bin baby’s’ dress in S3E3, and seeing the reaction that people had to the baby was the catalyst for Villanelle wanting to find her family and people whom she would feel that same belonging and love, that she had never been able to experience; in S3E5 the colour was used for Villanelle’s mother’s cardigan, to represent the person who she thought would (and should have) shown her this love that she was searching for; and now Villanelle is able to wear the colour herself, because after her conversation with Eve at the tea dance, she realises that she has found the love, acceptance and everything that she was looking for in Eve.

When everyone is gathered at Paul’s house for the big ‘whodunit’-esque reveal of who killed Kenny, Villanelle asks Eve “what is going on?” and Eve says “I have no idea”. This exchange is mirroring the one they had earlier, at the tea dance, when Eve asked Villanelle “are you leading or am I?” and Villanelle replies in the same words, telling her “I have no idea”.

The switch from Eve asking the question and Villanelle answering, to Villanelle asking the question and Eve answering; is used to again show us how they’ve reached a middle ground where they’re now in synch with each other. Both Villanelle and Eve having “no idea” also emphasises their mutual confusion; and therefore how - just like the tea dance scene - neither of them is ‘leading’ or ‘being led’, but they are both equal to one another and their relationship can work when they’re balanced.

The fact that in two separate instances Villanelle and Eve both “have no idea” about what is happening, also demonstrates how neither of them are certain about their future, or what their next step even is; but what they do know, having tried to be apart, is that the other has to be a part of their future.

When Carolyn demands for Konstantin to explain what happened when he went to visit Kenny on the day he died, Villanelle says “tell her” to him, and after Eve says “you killed Kenny”, Villanelle adds that “he doesn’t kill people, he makes other people do it for them”. In S3E4, after finding Villanelle’s family for her, Konstantin says “but I need you to do something for me, something personal, off the record”, which Villanelle is able to repeat, at the same time as he’s saying it.

Just as she repeats when Konstantin tells her “no, I can’t, I’m sorry” after she asks him to stay and watch a movie in S1E1, and when she repeats the advice that Konstantin gave her and Irina that “information is everything” in S1E8; Villanelle being able to repeat these things, illustrates how these are all things that Konstantin has repetitively said, or asked of her. And so we can see from Villanelle’s reaction, that she’s realised what a coward Konstantin is. Konstantin “doesn’t kill people” himself, but she remembers that he has asked her numerous times to do kills “off the record” for him, to fix his messes for him.

Villanelle saying “tell her” to Konstantin, also parallels with Konstantin telling Nadia to “tell them” in S1E6. The parallel demonstrates to us the switch in the power dynamic and Konstantin’s fall from grace. At the beginning of the series, Konstantin was a powerful figure, who could control the assassins who worked for The Twelve with a simple stare. Where Konstantin was once the one commanding others to do as he asked; now Villanelle is the one with the power over him, commanding him to tell Carolyn what happened.

Konstantin’s actions are made even more detestable to Villanelle, when he tries to claim that he “wouldn’t do that to someone I once” and then Carolyn completes his sentence by saying “don’t say loved”. We can see from Villanelle’s shocked reaction that she wasn’t aware that Carolyn and Konstantin once loved each other, and so this makes his actions even worse. Through the whole of Season 3, Villanelle has gone through a journey of finding her family or someone who will provide the unconditional love that a family is supposed to, Konstantin killing the son of a woman he once loved will hit a very personal nerve for her - and in the moment, the situation that’s unfolding between Konstantin and Carolyn is probably prompting Villanelle to imagine herself and Eve in the same scenario, where one unforgivably betrays the other’s love, which they both once shared and held so dear.

Konstantin trying to claim that he “once loved” Carolyn is also the same thing that he did with Villanelle in S1E7. In an attempt to get out of being killed by Villanelle, Konstantin stroked her ego and told her “I love you more than my family” (throughout the series, Villanelle has been trying to get Konstantin to choose her over his family); and in the same way as in S1E7, Konstantin is again trying to manipulate the love that other people have for him to get out of a sticky situation.

It’s when Villanelle says that Konstantin “makes other people do it for him”, that Villanelle starts to realise that he is “not family” to her, as we can see from her reaction that she doesn’t approve of him killing Kenny. However, this is even further reaffirmed to Villanelle when Carolyn is pointing the gun to Konstantin’s head. Konstantin yells at her “Villanelle, do something”, confirming to Villanelle that he only values her as his personal ‘attack dog’ - able to be called upon to do his dirty work for him and to protect him whenever he pleases.

After Carolyn spares Konstantin, and shoots Paul instead, Eve angrily says “why kill him, he had everything we wanted to know about The Twelve... he was a source”. In S1E4, Carolyn tells Eve “we’re not out for blood, Eve, we’re after information”. The reversal between Eve and Carolyn’s main concern, emphasises how their characters have developed since Season 1 and how their priorities have changed - Carolyn was once most focused on gathering intelligence about The Twelve and scolded Eve for getting off track with her continual obsession with Villanelle, but now only cares about getting revenge for Kenny’s death; and Eve was once blinkered in her pursuit of Villanelle, but now seems to be more focused on finding out more about The Twelve.

In the next scene Eve proceeds to run off from Paul’s house, after Carolyn tells her that she should go “cold turkey” and quit her ‘addiction’ with The Twelve, and then we get the bridge scene on Tower Bridge. It’s notable that Villanelle and Eve have their honest conversation on a bridge, as bridges are symbolic of communication, union and the ending of one cycle to the beginning of another. The conversation that they have on the bridge, which is a continuation of the conversation they were having at the tea dance, is a liminal moment for their relationship - it’s not only the full acceptance of one another and of themselves, but more importantly, their mutual decision that they want the other to be in their life going forward.

After discovering that they each had a hand in killing Dasha, Villanelle says “isn’t that romantic?”, and Eve replies “you know the only people who would think that are?” Villanelle asks “who?” and Eve answers saying “us”. Eve saying this, is not only an outward acceptance of the romantic aspect of their relationship, but more importantly her recognition of the darkness and the abnormality within their relationship - which is everything that she’s been trying to reject and ignore up until now - yet by referring to them as one, with the collective pronoun of “us” (rather than saying something like “the only person who would think that is you”), it’s evident that she also agrees with Villanelle that it’s “romantic”.

Villanelle tells Eve “I don’t want to do it anymore, any of it”; which was repeated in S1E5 when Villanelle similarly tells Eve “I don’t want to do this anymore”, and in S3E6 when she says the same thing to Dasha, that “I don’t want to do this anymore”.

Looking at the passers by on the bridge, Eve continues to tell Villanelle that “I used to be like them” but Villanelle tells her “you were never like them, you only thought you were”. Throughout the whole series we have already seen that Villanelle, as well as others, could see that Eve was different and had this darkness; but this is the first time that Villanelle has told Eve this properly, and that Eve hasn’t tried to contest what she says.

Villanelle goes on to ask Eve “did I ruin your life? Do you think I’m a monster”. In the same way that Eve said “I know” when Villanelle said she’s “killed so many people”; Eve doesn’t reject or judge her, but instead says that everyone has a monster, not just Villanelle, and Eve even accepts the existence of her own monster by saying “I think I wanted it [Villanelle’s monster] to [encourage her own monster]”. This acceptance from Eve is what Villanelle has been searching for this whole time; Eve doesn’t reject her or judge her for being a monster, like everyone else in her life has, but she accepts her for who she is and accepts her own monster - which is what Villanelle’s mother couldn’t do.

Then Villanelle tells Eve that she has a way to “make it stop”, “if that’s really what you want”. She tells Eve to “stand up straight and look at me”, and then she takes a moment to look at Eve, before telling her to turn around and face the other way. Villanelle probably knows - especially from the tea dance earlier where she told Eve to “go” and she turned round to look at Villanelle in her reluctance to leaver her - that Eve will turn around, but she’ll still be aware that there’s a chance that Eve won’t turn round, but will continue walking; so her taking a moment to look at Eve, is her taking the moment to look at Eve so that she’ll be able to remember her, in-case this is the last time she will be able to do so.

The song “Tell Me” by Johnny Jewel feat. Saoirse Ronan, begins to play when Villanelle is getting Eve to make her choice between her or returning to a normal life. The lyrics that can be heard are:

“Tell me I'm your baby,

Be mine for always,

I'll be yours forever,

Tell me I’m you baby,

And you’ll never leave me,

Tell me,

That you’ll kiss me,

Forever”

The song is mirroring what Villanelle is thinking in this moment. She’s giving Eve the option to choose her own future, but she already knows that Eve is her family and that she wants Eve to be a part of her own future - so she wants Eve to decide for herself to turn around and therefore “tell” her that she’ll “never leave” her and “be [her’s] forever”.

Villanelle then tells Eve to walk away and never look back, to leave her behind and be able to pursue a normal life again. Unlike what happened in Rome, through giving Eve the opportunity to make a decision that is 100% her own choice, Villanelle wants to display to her that she truly loves her: by showing Eve that if it’s the future that she really wants, she’ll put her own wants aside and let her go.

We also see that this scene is mirroring the tea dance scene, where Villanelle was the one who was stood and watching Eve turn back to look at her; but in this scene, Eve is the one who is stood waiting for Villanelle to turn back and look at her. This switch stresses the balance between Villanelle and Eve, as well as how neither of them knew for certain if the other would turn round for them; but even so, they both made the blind decision to choose each other.

Just before Villanelle turns around, Eve has already turned around and is waiting in anticipation of Villanelle’s choice, but Villanelle is taking a moment to prepare herself for potentially seeing Eve walk away from her forever when she does turn. Villanelle was the one who proposed this exercise, only as a way for Eve to be able to decide what she really wants for herself, but Villanelle already knew what she wanted and so knew that she would turn - so we see Villanelle take that moment to prepare herself to lose yet another person in her life, because although she thinks Eve will choose her, she can’t be completely certain.

The imagery in the final shot of Villanelle and Eve looking at each other on the bridge, as well as the promotional pictures (of Villanelle, Carolyn and Eve) which were released for Season 3, also invokes imagery from the Lovers tarot card. The symbolism of the card, is “in its purest form, the Lovers card represents conscious connections and meaningful relationships. While the Lovers card typically refers to a romantic tie, it can also represent a close friendship or family relationship where love, respect and compassion flow”. This makes the chosen imagery very fitting for Villanelle and Eve’s relationship, and what it’s developed into, in this scene. Both of them have come to recognise and accept that they have a deep “connection” with one another which, although they’ve attempted to break free of, clearly cannot be ignored.

You can read my previous Killing Eve posts here:-

First Introduction to Villanelle

First Introduction to Eve

S1, E1 - Nice Face

S1, E2 - I’ll Deal With Him Later

S1, E3 - Don’t I Know You?

S1, E4 - Sorry Baby

S1, E5 - I Have a Thing about Bathrooms

S1, E6 - Take Me to the Hole!

S1, E7 - I Don’t Want to Be Free

S1, E8 - God, I’m Tired

S2, E1 - Do You Know How to Dispose of a Body?

S2, E2 - Nice and Neat

S2, E3 - The Hungry Caterpillar

S2, E4 - Desperate Times

S2, E5 - Smell Ya Later

S2, E6 - I Hope You Like Missionary!

S2, E7 - Wide Awake

S2, E8 - You’re Mine

S3, E1 - Slowly Slowly Catchy Monkey

S3, E2 - Management Sucks

S3, E3 - Meetings Have Biscuits

S3, E4 - Still Got It

S3, E5 - Are You From Pinner? [Part 1]

S3, E5 - Are You From Pinner? [Part 2]

S3, E6 - End of Game

S3, E7 - Beautiful Monster

S3, E8 - Are You Leading or Am I? [Part 1]

——————————————————————————

[e-vasong]

What's the five-doesn’t-get-stuck-in-the-future-but-things-turn-out-the-same AU like??

:D I waited until I’d watched season 2 to answer this because I wanted to see if it gave me more ideas (which it did...but I’ll put those in another post if people want so I don’t have to spoiler tag this one).  This AU was brainstormed with @smallerthanzer0​ a while back, and they deserve extra credit because they are the one who listened to me going “lmfao what if Five didn’t get stuck in the future and decided to try and get rid of their dad” and said: wait. eva.  THIS COULD BE GOOD.  

so basically.  in this verse:

 Five does not time travel at age 13 and leave his family behind. he considers it, just as in canon, but something stops him.  Outside interference, maybe, or just a niggling voice in his head that cautions him that the risk isn’t worth it.

What Five does do is snoop.  And what he finds is a journal in their father's study with damning notes on Vanya.

He confronts their father about it.  Reginald doesn’t take the challenge to his authority well.

Five is tired and hurting and at some point he realizes: their dad is never going to stop.  And then he thinks: but I could make him.

So Five starts making a plan.

A plan that, should it come to fruition, would knock the Apocalypse off-course entirely.  The Commission, already interested in Five for his abilities, decides that Five needs to be removed from the equation. 

 Notes start arriving for Five in strange places.  Telling him things no one could possibly know, making promises no one could possibly keep.  Warning of the end of all things.  

Five is no fool.  He crumples them up and throws them in the trash.

Then Ben dies on a mission

They’re 15, going on 16, and something goes wrong.  A mission gets all fucked up.  They think things are over, and then a gun goes off.  Ben’s body jerks.  There’s a spray of blood.  He stumbles, and then the beast comes tearing out.

 Run, Ben begs, and his siblings do, because there’s nothing else for them to do.  Not unless they want to die too.

 But Five can’t.  He promised.  He promised that he’d protect them.   And if he leaves Ben here…that means he’s already failed.  Blood is pouring from the bullet wound in Ben’s shoulder, dribbling down the corner of Ben’s mouth.  He’s hovering in the air, limp and unconscious.

Someone, Klaus maybe, makes a sickened noise and lunges for Ben.  But Luther stops him, catches him around the waist and bodily carries him out.

 Go, Five says, as his siblings make it to the door.  Allison is the last one out.  

Come on, come on, Five, she says, holding a hand out to him.  There’s tears trickling down her face, but she’s trying so hard to keep it together, and Five hates to break her heart any more.  He smiles at her.  

Sorry sis, he says, and slams the door in her face.

Ben’s tentacles are still violently attacking anything within reach; the only reason why Five is still in one piece is because Ben is unconscious and without Ben, the tentacles don’t seem to have eyes or any idea what to aim for.

 But it’s too late.  Five’s been doing this long enough to know when someone is fatally injured.

 But Five has one last trick to try.  And if it doesn’t work…well then.  At least he died giving it his best shot.

 Are you watching? He snarls at the ceiling.  Are you watching?  This is me saying yes.  The deal.  I’ll take your fucking deal, god damn it.

 His world goes hazy, and he doesn’t register the pinprick of pain until the drug is already rushing through his system.

 Huh, he thinks, and then passes out.

From outside, all that’s distinguishable is the sound of Ben’s body tearing itself apart.  Five yells, something inaudible, words swallowed by the din.  There’s a flash of light.  And all is quiet.  

 Ben's body disappears along with Five’s and no one knows what happened to them, except for the fact that they must certainly be dead.

OK I’m putting the rest under a read more because this is long and I don’t want to be rude lmfao.

The Commission wants Five to kill people, just like in canon.  And Ben is...well, the Commission works with time and reality.  They have uses for a boy who can open portals between dimensions, though none of them are very pleasant. 

 In return...Ben gets to live, and at the end of it all the Commission will let them retire with time, money, and the resources to do whatever they want to Reginald Hargreeves.  

(Neither of them buys that, of course.  They're both too valuable.  Five is habitually suspicious, and they both have their doubts about where that mystery bullet that hit Ben came from.  And of course, though Ben and Five don't know it yet, the Commission is killing two birds with one stone with this trick, because taking both of them out of the picture is key for making sure the scheduled apocalypse happens).

So Five kills people for the Commission; Ben becomes a test subject

And things are different, and in many ways they are the same

Five and the Commission are using each other—Five to save Ben and his siblings.  The Commission want to use Five’s powers, and they want to keep him from knocking the Apocalypse off track 

Five has to go hard and fast in this verse: he’s young, the Commission has less patience for his mistakes, and his coworkers are gunning for him because it is embarrassing to be out done by a 16-year old.  There’s no room for weakness or error.

He only ever allows himself moments of softness with Ben, because Ben…Ben needs it.  And isn’t that why Five is doing this?  Isn’t it why he does everything? To be what his siblings need and more?

Hazel hears about this new test subject they got in the labs.  sibling to the new recruit.  powers like they never saw before.  and Hazel meets Five, and...doesn't like the kid, really, but a kid is a kid and that already sits poorly with Hazel.  

But he has got to get a look at what they're cooking up in the labs, so he drops by the medical wing at one point.

And there's this kid laying in a hospital bed.  bandages wrapped around his chest--not as scrawny as Five, but somehow he just seems smaller. Warm eyes, a bright, real smile--so different from his brother already.  And so they get to talking

And Hazel talks to Ben, and Ben is...fuck, he's such a good kid.  And Five must be too, because Ben is always reading some book or another that he says Five snuck in for him. (Please don't tell, Ben says, wide-eyed.  Hazel crosses his heart, and starts bringing books by the dozen.  They trust him much more than they do Five, and they don't mind that Ben is reading, really.  They just worry that Five is scheming.)   

And at first, Hazel tries to convince himself that he's not going to do anything stupid (though--some part of him knows from day one that if Ben asked, really really asked for his help...Hazel would say yes).  But it gets harder.  The surgeries get more invasive, Five gets more desperate, Ben's skin gets sallower and his smiles get weaker.

Hazel spends a bunch of his free time in the medical wing, keeping Ben company when Five can't.  Reading to him, discussing theoretical physics with him.  Until one day he overhears something he shouldn't--plans for Ben.  Idk what.  Maybe they aren't fatal, maybe they're just painful.  Maybe it's the same as normal, but hearing about this child talked about like a science experiment to pull apart and discard is just too much.  And the next time Hazel and Five brush shoulders in the hall, Hazel grabs Five by the wrist.  Makes a big show of seeming mad.

And Five is watching him with cold, dangerous eyes. He's barely resisting the urge to break Hazel's arm and Hazel knows it.  But something must hold him back; Hazel hopes that Five knows that Hazel isn't faking caring about Ben.  That Hazel wouldn't just attack Five in the middle of a hallway.  He must, because he snaps back a couple times, leans into the banter with witty retorts rather than violence.  And then after all that posturing and threatening, Hazel says: "So I know you think you're hot shit around here, but you listen here.  If you ever talk that way to me again I'll...well," and then he leans down, whispers in Five's ear: "the Handler is going to be out of her office in two hours.  Get the key.  East hallway.  There's a collection of spare briefcases, last room on the left."

 And then he keeps walking.  Ben and Five are gone by that night, and the Commission launches a search mission right away.

They aim for October 1, 2008—the day their siblings are supposed to turn 19, which is the age Ben and Five are now.  They fuck up.  Five is distracted, maybe a patrol bursts through the door and opens fire.

They arrive on October 1, 2018, on their siblings’ 29th birthday.  The briefcase is smoking and sparking, a dozen bullets buried in the side of it.  It’s useless.  Five throws it in the trash.

The family is scattered and ten years older than they planned for.  Reginald Hargreeves is still alive.  The Commission is coming for Five and Ben.  The Apocalypse is looming.

Things are so very different than in canon, but in many ways they’re exactly the same.

Five and Ben take off on a quest to reunite their separated siblings.  Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, and Vanya now have two traumatized adolescent brothers to take care of.  It does wonders for group cohesion.

And there’s so much more, but this is ridiculously long already lmfao so I’ll leave off here unless people ask for more deets.  I just have a lot of feelings about this AU.

[cosmic-day]

So. Lucifer season 5b definitely happened. I’m still unsure about how I feel about it – some parts worked for me, some very much did not. I think part of the problem for me was expecting too much. I mean, I binge watched seasons 1 – 5a because I was looking for something fun and distracting, which it absolutely was. But then, whoops, the characters are so good I accidentally got invested. And then I read a bunch of fanfic, much of which is excellent, especially the @ariaadagio epic For Each Ecstatic Instant (which if you haven’t read, you should) and on reflection I think I just wanted them to film that. Which *may* have been an unrealistic expectation.

Anyway, over long and over thought ramblings on this season under the cut, with MAJOR spoilers for 5b:

Let’s get the bad out of the way first, I hated “Daniel Espinoza: Naked and Afraid.” Hated, hated, HATED. That was not a “prank”. That was torture. They put Dan’s life at risk, gave him multiple concussions, made him believe he was dying, made him believe he’d caused a massacre and got Maze killed, and it was played for laughs??? And then, to add insult to injury, Dan *learned* from it, and was *grateful* so that’s OK then. It’s OK to be cruel to someone if it’s for their own good. JFC. I am never watching that episode again. I don’t even want to think about it.

(Although I will admit, that “because you fucking shot me, Daniel” was gold. As was, I AM NOT AN UBER, DAN.)

I’m not sure that having God around worked entirely for me either. Dennis Haysbert was great – his entire performance seemed to live in an uncanny valley between “warm and comforting” and “distant and terrifying”. I kept thinking of that Good Omens quote about playing an incomprehensible game for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won’t tell you the rules and who smiles all the time. So his characterization was really interesting, I’m just not sure the episodes worked.

I did appreciate that God being a terrible father was addressed in the first episode, with Amenadiel’s quiet admission that he hopes to do better by his own son hitting the hardest. Oh, Amenadiel. But then all of that pain and anger seemed to get a bit swept under the carpet in favour of the humorous side of Lucifer having to deal with God, and weird comedy about retirement homes. As a result, the final goodbye just didn’t quite land for me. I am happy for Lucifer that he finally got to hear what he clearly desperately needed to hear, but it just felt a bit hollow. Also, was I the only one thinking about all the other siblings who also deserved a goodbye?

And then there was the final “wait, was this part of your plan?”/*enigmatic smile”. Oh please, spare me. This was the thing I was most afraid of – I hate the argument that it’s all part of God’s plan, for kind of the same reasons as I hated the Dan episode – the pain and the suffering and the hurt still happened, all of God’s children are still kind of warped, your plan is still monstrously cruel even if it works out all right in the end. I mean, if you wanted Lucifer to forgive himself and take over, there were easier ways to achieve that, with way less collateral damage.

I do think that line was intentionally ambiguous, and God definitely seemed like the kind of dude who would claim to have a plan even if he didn’t, but all the same. To once again quote Good Omens, bollocks to the great plan.

And speaking of Gods who definitely don’t have a plan, O HAI THERE LUCIFER. Man, I did not see that coming. I still can’t wrap my head around how this going to work. I loved Lucifer’s progression from wanting to finally prove he’s worthy to doing it for love, and I loved that he also seemed to be motivated at least in part by his rage at the broken system. Come to think of it, there’s an interesting parallel between Lucifer wanting to do better as God, and Amenadiel wanting to do better as a Dad to Charlie. But Lucifer has no real idea *how* to fix any of it – it occurs to me that you could write a really dark version of s6 with Lucifer trying to fix things and just making it worse. So yeah. What the fuck happens now? Oh my Lucifer.

Ultimately, the thing I most want addressed is the problem of Hell. Like God’s plan, and the “prank” on Dan, the idea of hell is something I just find repellent, and how I feel about the show in the end probably hinges on how they deal with Hell. Between Lucifer’s fury at Dan being in hell, and Mr Said Out Bitch (yay!) proving that people can get out, I assume at least part of s6 will be Operation Get Dan To Walk Through The Door. I just hope it isn’t a case of saving Dan and leaving all the other faceless souls to suffer. Lucifer does say explicitly when sparing Michael that “everyone deserves a second chance” so I hope they follow through on that.

I also have to wonder if heaven is really that much better – one detail I loved was that Chloe in heaven had essentially forgotten about Trixie and Dan and Lucifer and the war, the implication being that heaven just doesn’t let you think about anything that would make you sad? I’m not sure if that was meant to be horrifically creepy, but it came across to me as horrifically creepy. Not to mention Cain, Lilith and Eve all ultimately rejecting immortality, but eternity in an afterlife is still immortality in effect.

Otherwise – loved Maze, love Maze/Eve, wish we’d got more Lucifer/Maze (seriously, their relationship is always short changed) felt a bit meh about Linda’s story, Ella just seemed to be kinda…there, sorta hated Chloe giving up her job to be Mrs G, I don’t want Maze to end up as Queen of Hell because it seems like regression for her, disappointed not to have more Lilith, I wish at some point the show would slow down enough to actually explain some of their bonkers mythology, we still don’t really know what happened in the Rebellion and it seems we never will, also what does “being god” even mean in this verse, or having a soul for that matter, how much if anything of what Michael said was true, just how do you gaslight an allegedly omniscient being and.. anyway. I just took about 1,000 words to say, essentially, WTF so it’s probably time to stop.  I have to say that despite my misgivings, the entire case brought their A game, especially Tom Ellis and Lesley-Ann Brandt, and also credit to Scarlett Espinoza for that heart breaking hospital scene. I still love all of the characters, especially Lucifer himself, and his long journey out of self loathing is really moving to me. I’m totally here for S6, and also, I bet there will be some really great fanfic.

So yeah, in that immortal Knives Out quote – makes no damn sense. Compels me though.

[wri0thesley]

many many anons under the cut bc i didn’t want anyone to feel like i was ignoring them and i wanted to respond to u all! warning for small text too, it was so long i wanted to make it look smaller fgbnjkgkjn

Anonymous asked: NAT... you can write WHATEVER you want! It's your blog, and I hope that rude anons can learn to respect that. I used to be on your blog just for jjba content too, so when you started getting into jjk I was indifferent but eventually you dragged me into jjk so hard!! I already like bnha, so seeing you write for it only made me happier! I hope that you continue to write whatever make YOU happy:) ❤and yes, longer fics certainly doesnt mean it's better, quality over quantity

ahh i’m happy that you are here for all three!! i always feel so accomplished when someone is like ‘your constant screaming made me think about jjk <3′. all three of the fandoms are fairly popular and i tag everything v carefully so i hope people who do use the filtering find that useful!!! 

Anonymous asked: Goodness gracious. People really be out there thinking they're entitled to dictating what kind of content you should be making

i think part of it might be that i do take requests so people feel like they have like . . . a certain right to certain kinds of my content? i take requests mostly bc they keep me motivated, i like making content for ppl who cant find what they want bc i’ve Been There, but maybe people think i am a pushover? idk i am just trying to have a good time!!!

Anonymous asked: Hi. I only started following you a few days ago but please ignore that rude anon. People are so fucking entitled towards writers it's insane. I recently had someone throw a fit for "spoiling" something in my fanfic, even though the fic was about a manga-exclusive character, so what did they expect?? Overall I've really enjoyed your writing so random assholes coming to guilt you is just a shitty thing that happens. Keep going with what you wanna do.

ah gosh anon i’m sorry about that :(. i’m always super careful tagging spoilers and stuff but like, if someone clicks on a fic about say, naoya or the steel ball run boys and is mad that i spoil something they havent found out yet . . . yeah thats on them fgbnkjgfkjn

Anonymous asked: That...that anon had the nerve to say "we". The fuck?! No no no anon, YOU'RE the only one talking and you're just talking for yourself, don't you dare try and lump us other anons/followers up with you to make yourself look like you're right. We love you nat and we appreciate you. It's your blog, you're allowed to write about whoever and whatever. This brain dead anon just needs to either go read someone else if they're that salty or write their own stuff if they're that impatient.

gosh i WISH some of my mad anons would just write their own stuff honestly. idk if this anon thought they were talking for everybody but i guess they expected anons to agree with them and not be mad at them. i appreciate u anon ;_;

Anonymous asked: Just want to say that ily and you’re one of the best jojo fanfic writers in my opinion 💗 I don’t think you’re half assing jojo fics and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you being multi fandom. A lot of jojo blogs have started posting about jjk so it’s not as if you’re the only one. I’m not sure why you get hate like this but I think it’s just because you’re one of the popular writers and that makes people bitter for whatever reason. Keep being you and posting about the things that make you happy 💕

honestly after so long writing for jojo - i’ve written well over 200 jojo reader insert fics - sometimes it feels like i’m retreading stuff, and that’s when i take a break bc i dont wanna half-ass stuff!!! i love all of my fellow jojo friends who are posting about jjk too, i appreciate them <3. 

Anonymous asked: Hey my dude, ur writing has really grown since the jojo days and its better and awesome seeing u become happier to branch off and write in different fandoms 🤌🤌 those stupid anons are just boring farts that couldnt be bothered making their own content 😤😤 is it possible to block them to ease ur mind?

hello anon!! i run a statcounter for IPs but it doesnt always work for ppl who access through the tumblr app, i don’t think; a lot of the anon hate i get i just use the ‘block’ option, but last night got to me because i’ve been getting that kind of writer a lot which is . . . a bad look for the jojo fandom who are, as a whole from the ones i’ve interacted with, lovely!!! <3

Anonymous asked: People often forget, the person behind art or writing, is just another regular fan. You deserve to be happy with what you create and we should be thankful you share your talent with us. You also have right to change your main interests, and it's very normal thing. Jojo is one of the MANY things that you write for and all you get from that is a like or share. Its not your job. It's your fun thing to do, in spare time. You haven't betrayed anybody. That person was just rude, selfish and bored.

i am just a person doing my best!!! anime fanfic is one of many interests i have and i already devote a lot of time to it honestly, i love when people tell me they’ve enjoyed something i made bc it makes it feel worthwhile but equally it gets to me a lot when people are rude because i am usually trying my hardest. 

Anonymous asked: Bro that jjba anon... the entitlement🤮 Fam, you write whatever you want to write😤 -Saturday

dfnjbkjnkgf i find most fic readers are NOT entitled at all and are just grateful but when they are . . . oof. 

Anonymous asked: It's funny how people throw "we got you popular" and they think you start apologize and cry. Your writing and passion made you gain few numbers on a follow counter, nothing more. I think I'm too old for stuff like this, we are nothing more, but +1 on a number scale. You ow us nothing, we ow you nothing. Popular... Funny word. You just write for fun of it, fake scenarios about someone's manga characters. It's not that deep. Have fun and don't listen to people like this. I knew it's not that easy, but they are really not that important as they think they are.

extremely fun fact for people who think ‘popularity’ is important to me: i would 100% rather have 10 people who regularly comment, reblog my fics with tags and interact with me than 100 people who read my fic and either leave a like or simply move on. i think this is true for the VAST MAJORITY of writers tbh. i’m glad that people think i am a ‘popular’ blog (i am not in the grand scheme of things, one of my ex-best friends used to run a kpop reader insert blog with like 30,000 followers) bc it gives me an ego boost lmao, but i really just want people to read and enjoy the stuff i write!!! 

Anonymous asked: I followed you a while ago for jojo and when my friends started getting into jjk i was like...eh sounds like work...but now that I see you writing for it I feel really motivated to get into it!!! I really enjoy your writing and I want to be able to read the new stuff too!

ah anon i really hope you like it!!! it’s only one season rn if u wanna watch the anime and there isn’t too much of the manga to catch up on either but it is a lot of fun and it’s nice to be in a fandom that’s like, excited about a new chapter and new plot developments every week!

Anonymous asked: Pls dont reply if u dont want to! <3 I'm not sure if this will be of any help to you or not but this is the kind of thing that often helps me and is the only way I know to try comfort others so I wanted to give it a go~

Now im not gonna say 'dont feel bad pls' bc I know that's not really useful but what I do think is useful is just discussing why that anon and many others feel the need to respond that way. As someone who follows a lot of writing blogs myself and have done for a long time, i've seen my handful of favourite writers come and go for different reasons, lose motivation for a while, gain motivation for a while, go from multi to single fandom, or single fandom to multi. Often times as a reader it can be upsetting when things change but it's also important as a reader to understand that some things aren't in anyone's control, I can't control what my favourite writers become a fan of or lose interest of, I can't control things in their personal lives that may motivate or demotivate them to write, but what I can do is support them as long as they're active, and if they move on to do things i'm no longer interested in or i'm the one that changed interests, rather than being upset that they're evolving to do other things or that they're not evolving with me, I think it's important that I still feel thankful for the works that I enjoyed while we were still on the same page and this is how I personally deal with those negative feelings. I think the anons that lash out at you probably just dont know what to do with themselves, maybe they got attached to your works while you were still only a jjba blog and now that you're evolving they're upset, while I understand how they feel, they're going the completely wrong way about it. I've learned to take these things and turn them into something positive for myself or at least something bittersweet that I can move on from but the anons that lash out at you for whatever reason probably haven't learned this yet. Maybe it's because i've moved on and changed interests a lot myself that I know how these things go for both writers and readers but those anons maybe haven't experienced this as much so they dont know what to do with themselves other than complain that you've changed and throw insults at you in an attempt to get you to revert back. None of this is because of the quality of your writing like they want you to believe, it's literally just because you've evolved and while some of your old followers might not like the new content for no reason other than it not being their cup of tea, it's definitely not regressed at all. You are pumping out a lot of content right now but every single thing i've read has just been better than the last. Things that really stand out to me is how well you get characterisation down to a T and all of your dialogue is just on point and from the pov of a reader I think those things seem the hardest to get right so I am such a huge fan of your stuff at the moment and I can tell you're really putting so much thought and care into each and every fic no matter how fast you're producing it, I think the fact that you're also proud of what you're writing at the moment really shines through as well and I just adore the passion that radiates from every completed request as well as in the responses for the subsequent thirsts resulting from these works that appear in your ask box later (I know i've sent quite a few by now~)

Just to be clear i'm not defending those anons in any way, while I can understand what they might be feeling/why they're reacting in the way they are I still believe it's just so immature to be hateful online point blank. Even during a time where I still got upset with writers if they started doing something else I still never targeted that negativity directly to the writer and sending rude or hateful comments whether on anon or not never something i'd stooped low enough to do even when I still had an immature way of thinking, however, I hope that it might make it a little easier to brush them off if we try and understand what they're really upset about, and that they're just putting the blame for their negative feelings onto the wrong thing rather than coming to terms with change themselves.

hello anon!! i appreciate the long message. i do feel bad for people who have no interest in what i’m currently producing and i get that they feel upset about it; i’ve watched a lot of fellow jojo writers move on completely or just stop posting, honestly. this kind of thing is why i was so intense about asking people if it would be better if i made a separate blog but the resounding answer seemed to be ‘i’m just vibing with whatever happens and i’ll block tags as needed’. 

i often return to works by my favourite reader-insert writers who no longer write for the fandoms i like (and i read stuff bc it sounds interesting or i trust the person who writes it), but change can be difficult and i guess at this point i’ve - whether u like me or not lmao - been a fixture in jojo reader-insert tumblr for a While so it’s probably kind of jarring. 

anyway i really appreciate you and the nice words! <3 

Anonymous asked: hi nat! I just wanted to pop in and say that regardless of what fandom you write for, the love and care you pour into your writing and into interacting with followers who care about your work as well is really obvious. you're doing this for FREE and people should appreciate what you've given us so far, since ultimately this blog should be for you, whatever that means to you at any point in time. it's ok to jump fandoms! the important thing is that you feel good about what you're producing and that it makes you happy. everyone else is just a bonus - but, seeing you on my dash certainly makes me happy : ) I hope you feel better soon!

thank you anon! i’m feeling much better and happier today. birthdays are very difficult for me (i did not think i’d be alive at eighteen, much less 25!) so this event is definitely kind of a way for me to concentrate on something else, and i’m a little bit extra sensitive atm. i appreciate you so much, thank you for the kind words!!! <3

Anonymous asked: Hello! I just wanted to say, write what YOU want and make YOUR writings as long as you'd like. 💖 To the anon who is like "We mAdE yOu FaMoUs dOnt HalF asS iT" stfu, let people do what they wanna do. If you think they half do it, write something better and longer you asshat.

this is an open invitiation to that anon to send me a link to their writing blog and i’ll hype them up i promise <3 

Anonymous asked: nat i'm so so sorry about that ask please know that your older followers don't share the same opinion :( sometimes people forget about the living, breathing person behind the screen smh. you are not a machine. you absolutely should not restrict yourself to posting about one fandom forever. yes, we're first pulled in by your amazing content, but we stay for your wonderful personality and work ethic. please just keep being you, taking up projects you feel comfy with! <333 bless u

ahh thank u anon! unfortunately i actually am a writing robot, i’m sorry u had to find out this way. my jojo chip has been removed, please send it back so i can continue to not half-ass my jojo work. fgnjkbgjkfn thank you so much angel!!! i appreciate you ;_;.

Anonymous asked: i don’t think it’s fair for other people to say shit about what you choose to write about because on tumblr and other writing platforms, writers are constantly developing how they write and the fandoms that they write for. it’s not fair for someone to criticize that “you don’t care about jjba blah blah blah” because you can enjoy new shows/manga. and like you said you’ve grown so much!! proud of you nat and im glad that ive been able to read your works (sincerely other nat)

i am STILL waiting for you to come and fight me other nat fgnjkbnf. it’s nice to be enjoying different things! i am constantly learning new things and reading new works and making new friends and improving and i think that’s important. i do care about jjba - a lot! but i can care about other things too! <3 

Anonymous asked: I may not be one of your oldest followers, but i've been here for almost 3 years. Yes, i started following u for ur jojo content, but let me tell u, ur newfound motivation and enthusiam for other fandoms was honestly contagiuos for me. And i say this as a person who finds very difficult to move from one interest to another. Jojo is great, but so are other fandoms. Please don't let some faceless scum rob u that motivation. This is ur blog and u r always free to write whatever u want.

honestly, i have been there! i am autistic and i have special interests and watching other people move on to stuff i’m not vibing with has made me sad in the past, but i want people to be happy more than anything and sometimes that means new things and change! <3 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I saw that rude anon message & I just wanted to pop in & say that they're wrong. You're not betraying anyone & you should write whatever it is you want to write. I followed you for jojo & I'm not familiar with the other fandoms that you write for, but personally it makes me SO happy to see you enjoying new things! It's always good to find joy wherever you can, so keep writing what you're interested in. There a lot of ppl who want to see you happy and healthy <3

honestly the idea of it being a GRAND BETRAYAL is so funny, i am just writing anime fanfic here and thriving!!! tysm anon! <3

Anonymous asked: Those anons can piss off! They have no right to judge how long or how short your writing is. If they want longer content write it their damn selves. I think your writing has improved wonderfully and I originally followed for Jojo and I'm enjoying all the content period. I don't even watch jujutsu ( not my cup of tea personally) but I love seeing the creativity and the interactions. You write what makes you happy Nat and that's on that! You don't owe anybody anything! I know how hard writing is and when your consuming new content it's hard to make content for something else. That doesn't mean you don't like it any more your just doing something different for a while. Love you and your content and I'm enjoying the love your putting into your content whether long or short. ♥♥💕 Sending love your way!

honestly my idea of ‘short content’ is still over 1k words, i’m not good at reeling myself in! i guess it’s bc they see like, 1.5k jojo fic versus 5k jjk fic but it’s not that i didn’t enjoy the first fic, just that the point and the story came a lot quicker and so did the natural end! thank you anon, i appreciate you ;_; 

Anonymous asked: Hello! Just wanted to let your know that I think your writing is awesome, and that you should write for whoever and for whatever you want to! You dont have to stay loyal to one fandom or anything, and your followers shouldn't expect that from you! It's not like they are paying you to write, you are doing this for free, and because you enjoy it and it makes you happy! If they dont like your stuff, they dont have to follow you, they can go to other blogs that cater to their taste, and they definitely don't need to be sending you such hurtful comments, and they dont get to make you feel sad about your writing! Just because they followed you during your earlier stages of writing, doesn't mean you owe them some type of loyalty or compensation! You can write literally whatever you want as long as it makes you happy! That's what your hobby and your blog are for! I hope you know that alot of your followers love your work and think that you are an amazing writer and are down to support the work that makes you happiest! 💖💖

ahh thank you so much anon!!! i am always so bowled over by how many people are nice to me when something like this happens, i am sending you my love <3

Anonymous asked: don’t listen to them!! we love you as a writer no matter what you write, because you’re a good person and a talented writer!! you shouldn’t have to change what you write to please a bitter person, and if they only want jjba, they can go to another blog instead of bringing you down. you’re doing amazing and they should be thankful you grace us with your talents!!

to be totally honest, if i was half-assing or not vibing with content i was making i just. wouldn’t post it. like you’d be able to TELL when i was half-assing stuff just to get words out (source: i have re-read my own nanowrimo works). there are lots of great jjba blogs who could do with more followers n interaction!!! i hope they do find them and i hope they’re nice to them :(. 

Anonymous asked: Please don’t pay attention to that anon. People only have that confidence when they have anon turned on. Them looking through your blog despite feeling that way is peak fan behavior and speaks to how addicting your writing is. Naturally, you can’t please everyone and there will be people who are irrational and feel entitled to tell you what to do or what to write no matter what. Trust me when I say they’re a small minority and are more likely probably passing viewers rather than regulars. I check your blog about three or more times a day because I love reading not just your fics but also your takes, banter with other anons, or even random updates. Brainrot posts? LOVE TO SEE IT!!! Desk update? AMAZING!!! With that being said, don’t feel pressured to continue pushing out content for others. Write what makes you happy! You’ve been writing for JJBA for 4 years and it’s completely normal + healthy to get into new media. I’m not sure if it would mean much, but your love for JJK has gotten me excited to start it too!!

anon i really hope you enjoy it!!! sometimes these anons remember stuff i’ve posted and said better than i do tbh, i am living in their heads rent free i guess! 

Anonymous asked: I've been following you for a couple of years and honestly it would always be a joy to see when you posted. Your writing has improved and I'm very happy you're enjoying yourself ! I know it hurts hearing and seeing stuff like that but I'm happy you're here. I'm honestly blessed everytime you post. Your writing is phenomenal. I love reading it even if its characters that I dont care for. You capture their essences so well and weave an amazing tale within the prompts and whatnot. You're amazing nat!

wehh thank you so much!!! re: the improvement, i really don’t feel like it has and then i re-read something i wrote when i first started and i’m like oh my god maybe it has. did i really write about jotaro acting like that. 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat. I recently became a follower of yours and I'm really saddened to see you get hate. You seem like a genuinely sweet person with amazing talent! I'm a writer myself and, unfortunately, get the same kind of comments. And when you get those comments, it doesn't leave you feeling motivated. People need to understand that people can and will, at times, grow out of fandoms. (1 Not just that but you're doing all of this for free. Again, I'm sorry you got such a comment. But please know that I'm proud of how far you've come. I'm proud that you're living a life that makes you happy. And no matter what fandom you may find yourself in next, I will always enjoy your writing. Take care of yourself. (2 end

HELLO NEW FOLLOWER I LOVE YOU (i get a lot more a day now than i used to and i feel guilty about not being able to look through so many blogs but i do try and follow back other writers for my fandoms!! ;_;). i’m sorry you get the same kind of comments! i’m always just happy to see people i like enjoying new things, even if i have no interest in it (hello to all of my mutuals who write for hunter x hunter and haikyuu, not interested but i’m sure you’re having a great time and i support you!!!). 

Anonymous asked: I'm sure you're getting a barrage of supportive messages now (at least I hope so) but I figured I'd add my voice, because I'm a longtime follower. Your writing is, and always has been, wonderful. I've been so happy to see you and Haz get to a place that works for you both. Idk if it's obvious for everyone, but you seem like you're emotionally in a pretty good place most of the time these days, and it makes me really happy to see that. I followed years ago for JJBA content, but I stayed because regardless of what content you put out, I find your wit delightful. And I'll stick around even if you move fandoms entirely, because whatever content or editorializing you produce is going to be worth reading, regardless of what it's for.

ahh, anon!! thank you for sticking around so long, sorry if you’re old enough to have been around the vore and jorts and spider rohan fiascos! <3 i am definitely a lot more stable than i have been and - barring the Pandemic Related Mental Health Issues - happier! i’m glad that it’s noticeable! <3

Anonymous asked: It actually makes me mad how entitled some people are. Nat, you're not a content creating machine and those who expect you to be are not worth wasting a thought on. Your love for something is not measured in word counts and for you to write every day without getting burned out in the slightest you really must have a burning passion and huge dedication to your craft. If others decide to send hate then allow me to send admiration because I can feel your love and hard work in each post you make!

i try and write every day bc it’s super good for my little ocd/autistic brain to have routines and distract itself, so i’m glad other people can enjoy them because that makes me motivated to carry on! like, i write for myself mostly bc the content i want i sometimes get find, but filling requests and writing for other people also leaves me with happy warm fuzzies too! i appreciate you!! <3 

Anonymous asked: If people only care about your writing for the jojo porn that’s on THEM, not you. Your writing was amazing when I followed about a year ago, and it’s only gotten better and will continue to get better! I think it really comes through when you enjoy what you’re writing and it adds a whole other layer of worth to it, because not only are you making free content but you LIKE that content and we can all gush about it together!!! More than just fans, I think you’ve created a community here and we don’t just stick around to read smut, I promise you that. -Reronon

i do miss having a discord community bc it was nice to talk to everyone in real time but it was hard work, i am glad that people feel like they can just come into my askbox and gush! i’m not very friendly in real life and people tend to think i am cold and stuck up so i work very hard to try and seem friendly and approachable online, which is much easier for me because i get to think and re-draft before i type! <3 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I’m sure you’re getting a lot of messages like this right now but I just wanted to say for what it’s worth that, as a person who originally followed you for jjba content and hasn’t watched/read any of the other series you’re currently writing for, I’m honestly still along for the ride. This is your blog and you’re allowed to do what you want with it and put out what content you feel like writing. Sometimes??? People acquire new interests??????? Shocking! I know absolutely nothing about jjk or bnha but out of curiosity still read some of your posts about them and even though I might not Get It, I still enjoy them because I think you’re a very talented writer! Honestly, as long as you’re still writing, I’m still down to clown, and whenever you take breaks (which are important!) I’ll still be waiting for your return or supporting and respecting your decision to stay away longer. Don’t let the entitled assholes get you down. Utilize YOUR blog and YOUR space however YOU choose. Your talent and kindness speak for themselves. Love you!!! ❤️❤️❤️

anon i care about you and i am so appreciative of you and everyone for sending me such nice messages! i am running out of ways to say it but it’s true, it really does mean a lot to me ;_; <3

[kittyprincessofcats]

RWBY Volume 8, Episodes 8-12

All caught up with RWBY now! (Except for the premium only episode.)

So, two things first: 1. From now on, my blog will no longer be spoiler free for RWBY! I don’t have premium access, so no spoilers for that, but beyond that, I might now reblog spoilers for everything that’s been released to the public. Blacklist “#RWBY spoilers” if you don’t want to see them.

2. I was going to ask what the spoiler policy in this fandom in general is when it comes to premium access. From what I’ve seen, Youtubers usually wait a week before uploading their reaction videos, which I appreciate – but here on tumblr almost no one seems to hold back. I saw a spoiler for “Creation” before it was released publicly. The day episode 13 was released for premium access, I had to unfollow people for posting untagged spoilers for it. And when I went into a RWBY-related tag for one second, I saw a really big spoiler that put me in a very sour mood because it also happened to be very aggressively worded against fans of a certain character (basically, along the lines of “I’m glad X bad thing happened to Y character because I hate them and their fans”). So, that scared the shit out of me and I ended up looking up more specific spoilers about what exactly happened because I wouldn’t have been able to sleep otherwise. So, from what I’ve seen, this fandom’s spoiler policy is just “fuck anyone who doesn’t have premium access” 😒. Always nice to see people being so considerate.

With that said, let’s get into my thoughts on episodes 8-12. Under the cut, because unlike some people, I try to be considerate of others who might want to avoid spoilers.

- So, the Hound really was a person. Specifically, a person with silver eyes and that’s probably what happened to Summer. THANKS, I HATE IT. This is exactly what I feared it would be and what I didn’t want it to be. (I don’t want Ruby and Yang to have to fight and kill their grimm-ified mom, that’s too sad, okay?)

- I love that Whitley really came through and came up with a plan for evacuating everyone! He’s a good bean after all! And that he managed to press that button on the computer before running from the Hound? Amazing.

- Willow Schnee being one hell of a mama bear and summoning a thing to protect Whitley was epic. She was so close to breaking down before that, but then her child was in danger and she just jumped into action right away. Protective mom instincts ftw!

- Blake’s talk about how she looks up to Ruby and how she herself lost the youthful optimism Ruby still has was SO sweet! (Also, Ladybug is an underrated ship/friendship and I really don’t get why people say they never interact? Have you all just forgotten volume 1 and how Bumbleby’s first meeting happened because Yang was trying to wingman Ruby who was trying to befriend Blake??)

- Penny fighting the virus from the inside was amazing, she did so well! I also loved seeing Nora encourage her (and echo Blake’s earlier words back to her).

- Unrelated to these episodes specifically, but I tried to think about who my favourite RWBY charactes even are right now, and I find it super hard to narrow down because I love so many of them, but if I tried to somewhat narrow it down, then (in no specific order because don’t ask me to also come up with an order): all of Team RWBY (though Blake is a personal favourite), Ilia, Penny, Salem, Cinder. (But then again, I also love Winter and Qrow and Robyn and... you get it, it’s hard to narrow down. Oh, and of course Pyrrha, but... you know.)

- “Witch” was honestly my favourite episode of the bunch. That one was just so full of epic stuff. (And now I’m wondering if Salem being one of my favourite characters has anything to do with my love for witches. I used to be obsessed with witches as a kid. In every story I read that had a witch, the witch was always my favourite character.)

- Yang and her team sure found a way inside that whale fast! Also, really handy that Ren’s semblance evolved just in time for when they needed it. But hey, I don’t want to complain about convenient plot stuff too much. Sometimes the heroes are allowed to have a little bit of good luck.

- Hazel listening to Oscar and deciding to get both him AND Emerald out of there was amazing! He really does have a soft spot for kids and wasn’t kidding about not wanting more kids to die – we love to see it! I also think it makes for an interesting parallel that Hazel decided to do this right as Ironwood was sending students to fight on the front lines and Marrow was calling it out.

- I really liked Ren telling Yang she doesn’t have to hide her fear behind jokes. Ren being able to see emotions is going to bring about so many more good moments, I just know it!

- Emerald and “Hazel’s” talk with Salem gets so much better when you know “Hazel” is actually Oscar – Emerald has gotten so much better at illusions and fooled Salem herself! That’s impressive!

- It’s really practical that Ren could sense Emerald’s fear. But also, the group really didn’t have the time to discuss if Emerald was trustworthy – they needed to get out of there asap.

- The way Salem spits out the word “semblance” when she talks to Emerald shows again that she not only underestimates these “new humans” and their powers, but also considers them inferior. It’s a nice little detail how just her tone when she says that word says so much about her worldview.

- Yang straight-up running up to Salem and blowing her up was epic. It didn’t last of course, but it was still a super bold and epic move. I’ve talked before about how cool Yang is and she just keeps getting cooler.

- Yang calling Salem out was amazing and epic, too! And when she referred to Summer Rose as “my mom” that made me tear up just a bit 😢. (I really don’t like Salem’s smile when she says “her again”, though. I don’t want grimm-ified Summer, I really don’t want it, okay? keep it far away from me where I won’t have to see it.)

- I’m a bit sad about Hazel’s death, but it was a really fitting end for his character and a really cool way to go out. The way he looked at all of those kids in danger (proving again that that’s what it’s about for him), whispered “No more Gretchens” to Oscar, punched Salem in the face as she was about to hurt Emerald, injected all of those crystals into his skin (which looked epic, by the way), told Emerald to go, fought an epic fight against Salem and then grabbed her and set himself and her on fire, burning her like a witch – it was epic stuff! RIP Hazel, you died as a hero and went out in an incredibly epic way!

- Hazel’s sacrifice must have been super tough on Emerald. He died protecting her (and JOYR) and it worked. She got away from Salem, but only because someone else, a friend, died for her. Not only must it be awful for her to lose Hazel, she probably also blames herself. (And, as I’ve seen others point out, it was probably the first time in her life an adult did something to protect her. Wow. Someone get this girl therapy, please.)

- The whale getting blown up was an absolutely epic moment. From the music to the cinematography, I loved everything about it. (That said, I will miss the whale. RIP coolest villain lair ever.)

- I loved Watts’ speech to Cinder – and I’m saying this as someone who became a huge fan of Cinder this volume. I love her, but I also love roasting her, and a lot of what Watts said was stuff she desperately needed to hear. I honestly didn’t even like Watts before that moment, but that speech might have made me like him just a tiny bit. The way he just laughed when she dangled him from a building, the way he spelled it out for her that her methods haven’t been working and threw her failures in her face, the ending with calling her “a bloody migraine” – Like I said, I’m a fan of Cinder, but that was glorious and cathartic and beautiful to witness. But what makes it really perfect is Cinder’s reaction: The fact that you’d expect her to kill him or at least scream at him, but instead she spares him and just sits down and cries. I really love what they’ve been doing with Cinder this volume and that they’re finally showing her as someone way deeper than just a power-hungry villain.

- In general, let me quickly talk about Cinder, because even without having seen the last two episodes I can already tell you that she’s my standout character / favourite character of the season. (It was Ilia for Volume 5, Salem for Volume 6, Penny for Volume 7 – and now it’s Cinder.) I said back in my post about Volume 5 that I wish they’d do more with her because after becoming rather interesting in Volume 4 they just went back to making her a pretty flat villain – and I officially have to eat my words and apologize to RoosterTeeth right now! This volume proved to me that they know what they’re doing with Cinder and explained so much about her. I’m sorry for ever doubting the writing. I now want to go back and rewatch the whole show while paying more attention to Cinder and I can’t wait to see where her arc goes from here (yes, I want an eventual redemption, and what about it?). This volume is obviously setting up something big for her – I just have no idea what it is. And at the end of the day, she’s still the Maiden of Choice. She’s the key to the Beacon relic, and that’s going to become important eventually.

- Oh, and can I mention, just by the way, that I think Cinder looks amazing? I don’t understand all the people who say they miss her red outfits when this is clearly her best look yet. The black eyepatch, the cape, the earrings, the short hair, the high boots, the shorts instead of a dress, all the black – this is her absolute best look, period.

- I’ve also noticed that the scene between her and Watts is the first time Cinder has referred to Penny by name. She’s always referred to her with phrases like “some toy” or “Polendina’s creation” before, but this time she just called her “Penny Polendina”, then “Penny” again, and asked Watts how she’s supposed to take Penny’s power “if she’s dead” (not “destroyed”, which is what Watts said, but “dead” – something you say about a person, not a machine). I think somewhere down the line, Cinder has started to see Penny as a person and respect her as the Winter Maiden. Maybe it’s because of how Penny won the fight at Amity, or maybe (though this might be wishful thinking on my part) it’s because Penny questioned why Cinder serves Salem and showed her and Emerald mercy.

- Also, side-note: While I loved Watts’ speech, it sure is bold of him to call Cinder entitled when his own villain origin story is getting overlooked for a science project.

- Neo is an amazing little troll and I love her. From stealing the lamp and skipping along the ruins of the whale happily to those texts to Cinder, all of her moments were brilliant and hilarious.

- Some characters not just forgiving Emerald is totally fair and realistic. But, as I said before (and as Oscar also points out), they don’t have to. People think a “redemption” – or let’s just call it switching sides instead of using such a loaded term – has to include everyone’s forgiveness, but it doesn’t. If Yang and Jaune never want to personally forgive Emerald, that’s okay. They don’t need to forgive her to recognize that she’s changed and work with her. And, as Oscar and Ren point out, Emerald’s abilities would be very useful to have on their side. So, personal feelings are fine and all, but right now they don’t have the luxury to dismiss a potentially very useful ally. (And same for Oz, by the way. It’s fine if they’re still mad at him, but they also need his help.)

- Also, have I already said that I’m very happy for Emerald? Because I’m very happy for Emerald for getting out of there! (Mercury’s and then Cinder’s redemption next, please!)

- F*ck Harriet for trying to get Winter in trouble for letting JYR go. I’m hating her more every second. And then she seriously said “Who cares?” about Ironwood’s plan to nuke Mantle? She’s the most unlikable of them all.

- Everyone’s reunions were so sweet! I loved Ruby and Yang hugging 😭. And Yang cupping Blake’s cheek and their forehead touch had me all 🥰 🥰 🥰.

- After he threatened to nuke Mantle, I hope we can all agree that Ironwood is a straight-up villain now. The most infuriating part is that he didn’t even have to do anything! Whitley and Weiss had figured out a way to save everyone in Mantle and the SDC ships to evacuate people were already there. All Ironwood had to do was let them evacuate everyone to Atlas, and then Penny would have opened the vault willingly and Ironwood could have used the staff to raise Atlas as planned. Problem solved! He should have just sat there and ate his food – but he was so pissed about things not going his way (or maybe he just genuinely hates Mantle that much) that he thought sabotaging the rescue plan and threatening genocide was a better option.

- I loved Marrow’s arc in these episodes and how you could tell more and more that his conscience was making him turn against Ironwood. First he questioned Winter when she was going to nuke the whale before JOYR were back, then he seemed shocked when he thought they were dead, then he tried to talk sense into the other Ace Ops after Ironwood’s ultimatum, and then he straight-up called out Ironwood himself. That last one was dangerous though, and he was lucky Winter was quick enough to jump in and pretend to arrest him, because Ironwood was going to just shoot him in the back.

- Speaking of, I wonder how long Winter has been planning to double-cross Ironwood. How long was she already disagreeing with him, but waiting for the right moment to make a move? Either way, I’m glad she was there to save Marrow.

- The Renora confession scene was so sweet and got me a little choked up 😢. I’m glad they sorted out their issues and told each other how they feel. But like I said before, I think Nora’s arc of trying to find out who she is without Ren is really good and important and Ren respecting that was really good and important as well. It was just a very wholesome scene. Also, I like that we got a little bit more backstory for Nora (her mom abandoned her? that’s awful), and Jaune awkwardly leaving the room was hilarious.

- Robyn telling Qrow he’s a better Huntsman than Clover because he chose to do the right thing was a really important moment for Qrow, imo. (And just a side-note: I’m sure most Fair Game shippers are pretty chill – and I’m a strong believer in ‘ship and let ship’ – but a certain subset of them is starting to get on my nerves with how they ignore Clover’s canon character and story (acting like he would have rebelled against Ironwood if he were alive as if the whole reason he’s dead wasn’t precisely because he cared more about Ironwood’s orders than doing the right thing) and how they make every new plot point about their ship somehow (Oscar’s semblance? Better be a time-travel thing so Clover can come back. Staff of Creation? Better be able to bring people back from the dead so Clover can come back.) It’s so annoying.)

- Yang and Ruby’s talk about their mom was really intense. Ruby’s been holding all of these feelings in for so long, so seeing her say out loud what we’re all fearing (that Summer was turned into a Grimm) and seeing both her and Yang break down over it – that was a lot. I loved seeing Yang comfort Ruby and tell her that her plan for Amity wasn’t useless. Their sisterly bond is so sweet.

- Penny asking Ruby to kill her was another really intense moment. The look on Ruby’s face in that moment really said it all. Ruby has been through so much, has lost Penny before, so hearing that request – even though they fortunately didn’t have to go through with it – must have still been a lot for her.

- I really loved Emerald’s cute “newly reformed villain” moments. (“You guys have been getting your asses kicked… some of that my fault” & “I’m just going to be super pissed if you all finally decide to give up the moment I switch sides.”) I’ve said before (in my She-Ra posts) that my favourite part of any redemption arc is the “former enemies, now awkward around each other” stuff, so this was right up my alley!

- “The girl who fell through the world” was referenced twice now. Between that, the image of everyone falling in the opening, and the lyrics “sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall”, I’m going to predict that someone – most likely all of Team RWBY – will fall into that void and potentially end up in a different world.

- The group’s plan to defeat Ironwood, stop the bomb, and get to the vault was amazing all-around. I love the parts Emerald and Winter got to play in it, I love how we saw the plan’s execution before seeing how they came up with it and I love how everyone got to help, even the Schnees and Klein. I also love that the hole Oscar blasted through the ground of Atlas became relevant again.

- The design of the vault and the door are really nice and now I wonder what the other two are going to look like.

- Saving Penny like that was super risky, but they really were out of options. Just the fact that Ruby had to be quick enough to use her semblance and get to the staff before the virus kills Penny… jeesh, that was close.

- Ambrosius is a super fun character! I love that he looked at Penny and said “I’d love to meet whoever did this.” Also, the staff seems more useful than the lamp. The lamp only lets you ask three questions per century, while the staff can be used as often as you want – as long as you’re okay with whatever it previously created disappearing.

- I honestly still don’t completely understand what Penny is now. Is she meant to be human now? Or is she just a being made up of pure aura? How does this work? Ambrosius only created the copy that destroyed herself, so what’s left is Penny’s aura – but she somehow also has a body now? I guess we’ll find out more about what exactly this means later.

- Also, while I wasn’t sure how I feel about this decision re:Penny at first, now that I’ve thought about it for a bit, I think it works. It fits with the Pinocchio story, and I like that they didn’t phrase it as “she’s a real girl now”, but as “this is the girl who’s been in there all along”. Also, Penny saying “wow” after hugging Ruby and then going on a hugging spree was adorable.

- Watching “herself” self-terminate must have been really traumatic, though. Even if that copy was just a robot, it was still a disturbing scene.

- Who shut down communications in the middle of Jaune’s broadcast? I’m assuming it was Cinder, Watts and Neo.

- The whole dimension with the doorways that Ambrosius created looks amazing. (A while before watching this episode, I wondered if Raven could theoretically save Atlas by getting everyone to safety with her portals. It might not have been Raven, but I’m glad I was at least onto something.)

- “Do not fall.” So, about that… they’re all falling in the opening, (and we referenced “the girl who fell through the world” twice now), so I don’t have a good feeling about that. Also, Watts has been dangled from somewhere high twice now, so the third time has to be when he actually falls down.

- And Cinder is there to ruin the plan because of course she is.