#I’m supposed to be going into the city tomorrow to see this musical and I was super excited but now I just wanna stay in my pyjamas and nap

[chosotallgf]

DOUBLE IDENTITY #2 - TOJI FUSHIGURO

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SYNOPSIS y/n is a third year college student who is about to intern for the top business company in Japan in a week, what happens when she unknowingly cross paths with her future boss not knowing he's hiding a secret.

WARNINGS mafiaboss toji x fém!reader, geto x fém! reader, alcohol, moderate au, sexual activity, criminal activity & behavior, naoya is his own warning, angst & fluff (not really lol) not proof read

p.s my work is only on A03 & tumblr!

Fast forward arriving at the club, shoko usually gets us in faster by talking to the bouncer. So happen she found out he was the guy she fake flirts with at the gym she ‘occasionally’ goes to. She said he landed a job here not so long ago, that he needed the extra money and was helping out a friend. Finally stepping into the club it was pack as hell no wonder utahime wanted to get here as soon as possible.

This is one of the main popular clubs in the city, surprisingly it’s not just made up of college students in the area but locals come here as often too. As i squeeze through the crowd trying to keep up with my girls I can feel the loud bass of the club music in my chest. turning around shoko grabs my hand “come on I hear the the DJ is playing lots American of music tonight” she said while smiling. I haven’t listen too much to American music in my life time but if I had to pick it would be ‘Les’ by childish Gambino to be played at least once.

Reaching the other side of the club where the bar is utahime puts in a few orders of drinks than shoko, we usually always order something stronger each time we come here. not paying attention to what she was saying I happen to look down at the bartender hands, oddly his knuckles were bruise and you could tell they had been bloody by how dark they were from his pale skin but I guess that’s what happen when you work at a popular club with crazy drunks who don’t care. snapping out of my glaze when he clears his throat and utter “and what would you like ma’am?”

Now Looking up at his face trying to get out of my head “um can I have 3 margaritas and 1 rum coke pls?” I rely but soon enough utahime & shoko look at my funny they both know I have a low tolerance when it comes to drinking but I still do it anyways.

“What?” I question them “aren’t we suppose to have fun tonight like we planned, so I say fuck it” utahime smiles wides “you sure? You know you can just start off-“ but she gets cut off by the bartender guy “if she wants to have that much to drink let her life short” I nodded in agreement with him “see? nothing wrong that’s tomorrow me problem” “fine but don’t call us when you feel miserable from a hangover” utahime mumbles. “You should go find us a free section, we will bring the drinks out and find you” shoko slaps my shoulder from behind.

Off and further from where I left, I can’t find a free section maybe ‘maybe I should try the other side this club is huge tho’. Not looking forward I bump straight in to the chest of a man? I tumble backward but luckily before I could fall he catches my back. Now we are super close chest to chest i get a clear vision of his face despite the all black hoodie he’s wearing. dark dead eyes with a noticeable cut on one side of his lip. He’s staring back into my eyes This feeling of closeness is getting intimidating I wonder if he realizes his hands are clutching more firm on my lower back. I start to panic

“Omg I’m so sorry” I can feel heat in my face now. I can tell he was lost in thought too because as soon as I said that he quickly turned his face and pulls his hoodie down over his eyes and let’s go making me find my balance again. “Pay attention next time” he speaks in an aggressive but low tone. “I know I know I was just looking for a sect-“ he cuts and moves me out his way saying “tch, whatever” he mumbles as he walks to the private section area. how fucking rude I think.

Im surprise the club didn’t kick him out for being suspicious with a hoodie on in here, they honestly should after that. next think I know shoko is now in front of me yelling over the loud music clearly trispy “y/n stop standing around and come over here we found a spot” shoko starts pulling me along with her.

I get to our own section i assume but see two guys, both of them I recognize as utahime and shoko childhood friends. “since you couldn’t do a simple task I had to ask this dickhead here to let us sit” “you should be lucky, I wasn’t even planning on being here tonight, my usual dealer been Mia and I need stuff for next Thursday party” he wines.

“Anyways let’s get to drinking we’re wasting time” I grab and drowned the 2 cups of margaritas “well someone is in a hurry” I hear the other guy next to gojo say “I’m suguru geto” he reaches his hand out to me to shake. I do the same “I’m y/n and yeah I just wanna let loose tonight” his hands are so soft and firm I wonder if his long hair feels the same. “No judgement here me and satoru are about to do the same” “sooo shall we finally get started or what?” shoko utter as smoke leaves her mouth.

author note ~ if you are seeing this when it’s first posted I will post chapter 3 later on during the day it’s 5am rn for me and I can’t sleep lol. if you wanna be tagged in that just lmk :) 9/8/24

likes and reblog are appreciated

[bobbin-buckley]

That Girl Is Mine

Tara Carpenter x Saxophoneplayer!Fem!Reader

Summary: You play saxophone with a band called “Sweaters In Fall”, you and another girl plus three other guys are in it. You’re girlfriend Tara comes to see your biggest concert at the Radio City Music Hall (NYC), after the concert things do seem to work with you in the band

Warnings: Fluff, Cat-Calling, Little bit of blood, Pervert, sexual mentions, lots of cursing, some punching

Y/F/B: Your Favorite Band

Y/N/N: Your Nickname

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s the night before you and your bands performance at the Radio Music Hall.

You were very nervous, it was unusual for you to be this nervous. It wasn’t because of the people but it was because your girlfriend was coming to watch with her friends and her older sister Sam.

Not that you were scared of Tara being there, you were excited that the dark brunette and her friends were coming, it was just Sam.

Sam never really liked you, she had her suspicions. You respected that since after what they’ve gone through was tragic. This special night wasn’t just about winning an award to you but it meant to prove yourself worthy for Tara, you wanted Sam to see your talent and maybe she’ll like you. Maybe….

“Yo Y/n! What’s got ya all worked up?” Your bandmate Damien asked, he was a nice guy, he was a tall lengthy black man about in his middle twenties. “You’re not all pumped up like you normally are during rehearsal.”

“Just nervous I guess…” “Nonsense! You’re never nervous!” Kayleen hyped. Kayleen was your best friend, you guys were pretty close she was the reason why you joined the band. Damien and the other two guys were a little eh about another Saxophone player joining, but the raven hair just glared at them and had you join. You were the high voice of the group, the great Alto Sax player.

“Yeah, Y/N/N, you seem so low right now and you’re the loudest person normally.” Pip spoke, Pip was your 3rd favorite of the group. He was pretty quiet the majority of the time but he indeed was a fantastic Trumpet player. ‘Pip the Pipet’ Damien gave him the nickname, Pip hated it but he’s adjusted to it now since it sticks with him.

You all had nicknames, yours was Sexy Sax (boy you hate it but at this point you don’t care, Tara teases you about it), Kayleen’s was Sax Positive, every time you hear that nickname you can’t help but laugh a little. Damien’s is Damn Keyboard (idk) as he played keyboard in the band. Last but not least Dan…

you hated Dan oh boy, if you were to go ghostface he’d be the reason.

Dan was a creep in your opinion. Nobody else agreed though, he was just very…odd. He was an older man, I’d say in his early 40’s, he does have a lot of experience in jazz and band in general but he seemed off…every time after your solo in one of the songs you’d catch him looking at you with heart eyes, you’d catch him doing it to Kayleen as well. Eugh…you hate him

“Yeah baby stop being so low, your supposed have a high pitched voice in the band. If you know what I mean.” Dan said…flirted?

You wanted to throw up after he said that. Fuck he gives you the jeepers creepers.

“I’m fine guys I swear. It’s just my girlfriend is coming to watch tomorrow and her sister..isn’t quite found of me..” you rambled.

“Sorry to hear that champ. But everything will go great! Just…focus on yourself and not the crowed.” Damien explained, you have him a nod.

“Well, it’s getting late guys we should head home for the night,” everybody nodded in agreement with Pip.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a quick walk home, you hadn’t lived far from Damien’s house. Which is where you guys rehearsed most days unless the Blackmore’s band director lets you in.

Moonlight On the River by Mac DeMarco was playing in your ears, your saxophone in case swaying in your left hand as you trotted in the perfect white snow on New York’s streets to your way home.

You swore someone was following you, feeling eyes staring at the back of your head. You stopped in your tracks turning around to see no one.

Maybe it’s an animal or my imagination?

You thought

As paranoid as you used to be it’s been higher ever since you heard about the ghostface attacks. Tara always pushed you away when you met, you weren’t sure why until you discovered she was The younger sister of Sam Carpenter.

Eventually you told her you don’t care about some psycho idiot under a ghost mask with a knife.

It wasn’t long after you confessed that you really liked her and started the first date. It’s been a few months since you guys started dating, you both were happy.

You told Tara you’d always be there for her if she wanted to talk about everything or anything else that’s keeping her down. She appreciates you for that, but also doesn’t want to burden you because she knows you have your own issues.

Opening your apartment door, stepping in and feeling the nice warmth greeting you. You flicked on the lights with your free hand after slipping off your shoes and walked to your bedroom.

You sat down your saxophone in the corner of your room as well as your backpack, coat. Walking over to your bed taking the snow covered sweater and sweatpants you were wearing off. (I’m more masc btw so masculine wear)

Putting on a white-T with a sweatshirt over that has Y/F/B on it and throwing on a black pair of sleep pants. That’s when your phone started buzzing in your bag.

You grabbed your bag again and opened it to grab your phone, seeing that your one and only was calling you.

With a smile you pressed the green button without hesitation and pulled the phone to your ear.

“Hey Baby!”

You blushed at her voice and nickname

“Hey Tar, how was your day?”

“Not bad, just- some arguing with Sam. You know, the usual.”

“Sorry to hear that, what was it about? If you done mind me asking.”

“It’s fine love, it was just about me walking alone to school. She needs to grow up sometimes, I mean I do appreciate her safety, it’s just a pain up my ass all the time.”

You understood Tara’s annoyance, your mom was the same. She’d harp on you about being safe even if your taking out the trash, (though you don’t live with her no more)

Sam was always protective, ever since the first Ghostface incident. Sam has prevented Tara from having outside friends (definitely after Quinn and Ethan).

That’s why Sam dislikes you, she’s scared you’ll be the next ghostface. But Tara wants Sam to understand that she’ll fall in love at some point, and she already has. It’s you

You’re the lucky girl

“Yeah I know hun, hey tell you what. Tomorrow night I’ll prove Sam with my magical music talent that I’m worthy!”

Tara chuckled, “sure baby, you are quiet talented my musical girl. I’m excited for tomorrow, by the way, how was practice?”

“Good, Kayleen and the boys are hyped. I think we’re all ready, I’m just a bit nervous…” you said, biting your nails.

“Why nervous Y/N/N? You’re never nervous.”

“That’s what the band said..haha.” You paused with a fake laugh. “I guess it’s me trying to prove how good I am to Sam, and how important you are to me.”

“Honey, even if Sam didn’t care about tomorrow then screw her, cause you shouldn’t care about what Sam thinks. It’s Sam! But I know Sam will get your trust eventually she just has a hard time opening up,” you sigh, “plus I think she’ll love it. Sam really likes music if you didn’t know.”

“I didn’t know actually, but thanks Tar.”

“No problem baby, I gotta go Sam needs my help with dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow night! Love ya!”

Your heart skipped a beat, “love you too, see ya!”

You smiled widely after Tara hung up. You were going to prove your worthy for Tara to Sam.

Sam doesn’t realize how much you love that little feisty girl

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s currently 7:30

Your show starts in thirty minutes

Sitting on an old chair in the back room as Kayleen does a few more touches with your make-up

You weren’t a big fan of wearing make-up, but Kayleen insisted on you wearing some especially for tonight. It wasn’t crazy make-up, just some highlights and eyeliner, nothing punk looking but more casual.

“Cmon Y/N/N you’re our sexy sax you gotta look sexy,” you rolled your eyes. “Even Pip gets a little bit of a make-over!”

“Uh-what?” Pip quipped.

“…Annnnd done!” Kayleen exclaimed, “it’s your turn Pip!”

Pip groaned but gave in

“A-are we all getting make-up?” Damien asked.

“No, Pip just doesn’t get the option because he’s one of our big soloists! But if you want make-up I’d be happy to-”

“Absolutely not,” both Damien and Dan said. The raven shrugged and went back to work

“So Y/N/N? How are you feeling?” Damien asked, as he sat next to you.

“Better, I talked to my girlfriend last night and told about my nerves but she said I’ll be okay and other things.” “Awe, she must be a real sweet one.” You blushed as his comment, Tara was a sweet one even if she’s a little feisty at times.

“We have about ten minutes left.” Dan looked at his watch.

“Shit!!” Kayleen squealed.

You laughed at her antics when she jumped to grab more blush

“We’ve got time girl.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tara shifted in her seat as she looked around the interior of the Music Hall.

She’s never been inside the music building, she’s only passed in on walks, in a taxi or on the bus.

It was quite beautiful, the lights were pretty, the room was nice and warm and it was just gorgeous in general, it was a very open dome with a lot of people.

Sam didn’t want to spend a lot of money so they chose the middle seats on the balcony. Tara wouldn’t really be able to see you but the tv’s they had were enough to see your gorgeous face.

“God I’m so excited! Thanks again Sam!” Chad smiled bright. Mindy thanked her too.

“Of course,” Sam smiled. “Thanks Sam, seriously, you don’t know how much this means to me and especially Y/N/N.”

The older Carpenter smiled at her little sister.

“Up next we have our Jazz Band “Sweaters In Fall!!!”

When Tara heard your band name she perked up and watched ahead of her as she cheered with the crowed.

You and band walked up stage with your instruments, the keyboard and drums already set for Damien and Dan.

“Let’s meet our lovely band! Up first is Pip the Pippet! Our Trumpeter!” Pip smiled shyly.

“Second we have Sax Positive Kayleen!”

Mindy shook her head, “reminds me of Quinn sadly.” Tara chuckled a bit.

“Third we have Damien that Damn Keyboard!” Everybody laughed and cheered.

“Fourth we have Drummer Dan!”

“He looks like he’s sixty!!” Chad yelled. Tara didn’t like Dan, the stuff you’ve told Tara about him make her sick in the stomach but that feeling faded away once the guy announcing announced your name.

“Last but not Least! Y/N/N the Sexy Sax player!!” (Sorry not sorry)

Tara blushed when you waved a bit to the the crowed. Knowing you were looking for her.

“Let’s get this party started!”

~~~~~~~~~(sorry if it’s cheesy 😭)

You were at the last song of your album. The next song was more of something you wrote yourself. (Not actually 😭 cause that’d be copyright)

Tara cheered with the crowed once the song was finished. You eagerly searched for her in the crowed then spotted her a bit later.

You blew a kiss at her as she did it back.

“Cmon Y/n! We gotta go!” Pip called.

You nodded, taking one last glance in Tara’s direction before following your friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“That’s it! That was it my guys!” Damien screamed in victory.

“Eh it was alright-” “What do you mean it was alright Kay? That was our best yet!!” Pip cut off Kayleen.

You smiled bright once you entered the backroom. This was definitely the best performance you’ve had in awhile, and you were proud of that.

It didn’t matter to you if you won something but- it mattered that you did it. All you cared about was Sam liking you.

The band continued to talk about the performance whilst you put up your saxophone.

“Y/n!” You looked up at her voice.

Tara jumped into your arms with a big smile, Sam and her friends no too far behind.

“Hey babe! How’s you guys get in?” You looked over Tara’s shoulder, making sure no guards were about to run in saying they broke in.

“They let us in, I told them I was with you.”

“Now who’s this pretty lady?” Dan asked, he made your stomach curl and in a disgusted way.

“I’m Tara,” she said a little grossed out herself.

“Hey! Y/n, you can officially meet Sam now!” Tara turned to her older sister, motioning Sam to approach.

Sam looked at you with those ‘I don’t trust you eyes’. Sam scared you a bit, but being up close..Jesus you were more scared.

“Nice to meet you Y/n,” your eyes widened. Sam, Sam Carpenter being nice to you? She held out her hand waiting for you to shake it. “I-uh hi- S-Sam.”

Sam pulled her hand away and chuckled, “you don’t need to be afraid of me. Sorry for scaring you a bit, I’m a bit worried meeting new people. As Tara probably already told you.”

You nodded with a small smile. Tara was ecstatic with your first impressions on each other.

“Yo Y/n! You gonna introduce them?” Damien spoke.

“Oh uh- yeah! This is my girlfriend Tara her sister and friends. Guys this is Damien, Kayleen, Pip and-..Dan.” You pointed to the each of them.

There were some waves and hi’s

“Y/n, you didn’t tell me your girlfriend was hella hot.” Dan walked close.

“Excuse me?” Both you, Tara and Sam said.

“You heard me.”

You looked at Dan with hatred. “Back the fuck up.”

“Woah, no need to get all frisky babe.”

“Don’t fucking call her that!” Tara yelled.

You put a hand out in front of Tara, keeping her back.

“Damn, she’s loud too.”

“Shut the fuck up you perverted mother fucker!” You shoved Dan back, but it wasn’t long before he struck your nose with his fist.

You stumbled back, wincing and clutching your nose as it bled. “Y/n..”

“Oh come on Y/n, your worse than your are at pleasing her.”

That’s when Sam lost it as well. Sam punched Dan, you pushing Sam back to finish the job.

You grabbed him by the shoulders and slamming him against the wall. “I swear to fucking god! If you ever say any of those things ever again I’ll break your skull!!!”

“Hmp, I’d like to see you try.”

Damien and Sam both grabbed your arm before you got the chance to swing another punch at him.

“Let me go!!”

“Dan, get the fuck away! Go! You’re out of this fucking band!!” Damien screamed.

“Whatever, I didn’t want to be here anyways, I just wanted to see some ladies.” Dan chuckled.

You snarled. “Get him away from me.”

Damien and Pip nodded before getting Dan out of the room.

“Y/n-” “Let’s just go home.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“How’s it feeling?”

You and Tara were in her bedroom. After tonight’s event, your hand was swollen and bleeding. Sam checked it and no brokenness to it, just some bruises and scratches, plus it’ll sting.

“Like shit.” You huffed, laying back on her bed. Tara already patched you up, it hurt like a bitch too.

“I’m sorry,” “no. I’m sorry, I should’ve just kicked him off the band way before!” You threw your hands up.

“Baby, it’s not your fault. It isn’t your fault he’s some fucked up pervert, but thank you for defending me.” Tara brushed her fingers through your sweaty hair.

“Anytime..” you smile. Tara leaned down to kiss you on the lips, placing her scarred hand on your unharmed cheek.

“I love you.” “Love you too.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is fuckin cheesy.

Sorry for not uploading this faster than I planned. Weird shit has happened this past week

I need ideas cause my brain hurts and I can’t think of anything rn

[bluenpjm]

she said no! ﹡ ksj x you

Ⓒ bluenpjm — all rights reserved. do not repost, translate or claim as your own.

synopsis.  the last 9 years with Seokjin have been nothing but a rollercoaster full of happiness and love and you can’t help but wonder how much your life will change on your anniversary.  genre.  slice of life au ◦ angst  pairing.  KSJ x YN wordcount. 1000 warnings.  relationships can be complicated, i suppose

Tonight was a big night. And although it wasn’t your style at all, you had taken forever to get ready. Taking one last glance in the mirror, you could see yourself glowing in the silky red dress you had bought specially for the occasion. The vibrant colors hugged your curves with grace and you smiled sheepishly at your reflection, Seokjin popping right into your head. 

The smooth fabric cascaded down to your knees, accentuating your every movement and your wavy hair had been styled in loose waves that added a touch of effortless allure to your appearance. The golden earring that had been a cherished gift from Jin on your first Valentine’s Day dangled delicately from your ears. 

Your phone rang, signaling that he had arrived and, swiftly grabbing your purse, you excitedly exited your apartment. You slammed the door confidently, knowing that you’d have to deal with the mess your bathroom had been left with only tomorrow morning. 

“Wow,” Seokjin leans forward in his seat, kissing your cheek gently. “You look beautiful.” 

“Thank you,” You couldn’t wipe the smile plastered on your face, so big that it made your cheeks hurt. 

The restaurant exuded an air of elegance and sophistication, its lavish decor and tasteful ambiance setting the stage for a memorable evening. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, casting a soft, warm glow upon the finely polished tables adorned with fresh flowers. The walls, replenished with framed artwork, added a touch of refinement to your surroundings. 

You sat by the window, your table offering a breathtaking view of the city outside. As the evening sky darkened, the streetlights below came to life, their golden hues dancing in harmony with the stars above. The cityscape twinkled with life, creating a magical backdrop for your 9th-anniversary celebration. 

The soft music playing in the background and the gentle hum of conversation added to the enchanting ambiance, creating an intimate space for couples to bask in the warmth of their love. Looking around you, you couldn’t help but wonder if this was the night Seokjin was finally going to propose. 

With each course, you lavished upon your favorite dishes, greatly accompanied by laughter and shared memories of all your years together. Of course, so did your hopes grow, the expectations soaring to unimaginable heights. But as the desserts rolled in, you felt your heart withered, as Jin made no move to reach for a ring or drop to one knee, a wave of disappointment washing over you. 

Silent tears welled up in your eyes, barely concealed behind a strained smile. It had been something that had popped into your head constantly, the beginning of your forever, especially now that you both found yourselves in such good places in your life. 

Sensing your sadness, Jin’s eyebrows furrowed, his eyes searching for answers. “What’s wrong, YN? You seem upset,” He probed gently, his voice laced with concern. 

Trying to fight back the tears, you struggle to show him a strong smile to conceal your lie “Nothing,” You clear your throat, “I’m just feeling tired.” 

Jin’s voice softened as he reached for your hand across the table, “Are you sure?” 

You sigh as one tear rolls down your face and your eyes met his worried ones, “I… I just thought tonight would be the night, you know?” He tilts his head, confused. “The night you’d ask me to marry you.” 

He’s somewhat taken about by your statement, the retreatment of his hand making your heartache. “I thought we were happy just the way we are.” 

“And we are, but—” Your voice trembles as you retorted. 

An uncomfortable silence hangs in the air, the weight of your differing viewpoints heavy on your hearts. Over all these years, you had discussed spending your life together, moving in, getting a dog over a cat or even kids, but you were never specific on marriage, assuming you had been on the same page; that one thing involved the other. 

Jin leaned back, his eyes searching for your face again, “YN, I love you more than words can express. And I want to be with you, to live the rest of my life with you by my side, but we don’t need a piece of paper to validate our love, or even to make it real… right?” 

At the lack of response from you, his voice softens, reaching for your hand across the table, “We can still have a beautiful future together, YN.” 

With a heavy sigh, you struggle to find the words, finding yourself in inner turmoil. He was right, of course; you had been happy for all these years, but marriage had been something you anticipated, something to bring your relationship to the next; to prove your love was real and strong. 

“I just need some time,” 

With an apologetic look in your eyes, you get up from the table, leaving a speechless Seokjin and an untouched desert behind. You ignore his voice as he calls your name from the table and, as you enter the taxi, your heartache and disappointment become too heavy to bear. The passing city lights become blurred as you travel home, your emotions threatening to consume you. 

Seokjin is left speechless, cheeks flustered as he keeps on replaying your escape in his mind. He’s quick to ask the waiter for the check, finding comfort in the emptiness of his car where the prying eyes of the nearby tables could no longer find him. 

He drives home, and similar to the mess you’ve left your bathroom in, he finds his living room—rose petals on the floor as they lead to the center table, where laid his surprise—a key to his home beautifully wrapped as he had been preparing to ask you to come to live with him. 

He laughs drily at the situation, heartbreak tugging into his heart as he can’t shake the feeling of how disappointed you’d be once you opened the little box and saw a key, instead of a ring inside. 

[manicjk]

Small Town Crazy ~ A Jensen Ackles RPF ~

Pt. 1

A/N: I posted a rough draft of this, but it's been years since I've written anything. The characters and places are mostly just OCs.

~~~~~~

June 17, 

  “No, man. Does it ever get less intimidating?” Jensen asks, as he sips lightly from the glass he held. He had agreed to meet up with his friend Steve, who was staying in Nashville again. They had played a show the night before, but split right after, so he could rest after flying in from a convention in Nevada, 

Steve laughed in response, then answered, “ I can lie and tell ya yes, but we both know better. Probably doesn’t help to be exhausted.” 

Jensen had always been a nervous performer, or rather person in general; and it definitely didn’t add any steel resolve that he hadn’t had so much as a night’s rest before their show. He admittedly always channeled his inner Dean Winchester when he felt nervous or tired, he knew he would push through easier that way. He did feel much better after the hot shower, complimentary breakfast (no, he would never turn down a free complimentary breakfast, obviously), and a good 6 hour sleep. 

The men shared another laugh, but Jensen had needed to speak to his friend seriously. The comment had only reminded him, “Speaking of, I was meaning to talk to you about what’s going on. Really what i’d like to work on, run it by you, just see how you feel about it.” 

“Yeah, no problem, man. What’s up?”

“Well, Nevada was the last of our conventions, at least for now, I don’t have anything lined up to work on, and as you so kindly pointed out- I am a little buffered,” he chuckled, but they both knew it was a serious conversation, “I didn’t know what I was going to do before we started the trip, but I did know I wanted to try to focus on something a little different. I didn’t re-sign my lease in Austin. I’m supposed to go look at an apartment complex in Rockford.” 

“Okay, that’s about an hour from here, but your friends and family are back in Texas, that’s a big move, man.” 

“It is, but flying to see them isn’t such a big deal. I really think just being in small town life for a minute, giving it a try might help me get back to myself.” He really hadn’t had that, he grew up in a decent sized city, and had stayed busy most of his life. It can be taxing to always try being other people, especially when you do it for so long that your lives seem to blend. That, and that living in Austin, as notorious as it was to be recognized there, it left even less time to have a day off. 

“Sure, sure. You know I support you, and I know you wouldn’t even try it if it wasn’t something you thought you needed to do. What are you gonna do?”

“I would like to work on writing some music, maybe explore a few hobbies, just decompress.” 

“Well, I don’t really have much to do until later tomorrow night. If you need a partner, i’m down to go check out the place with you. Have you been looking at other places, there a reason you’re gunning for that one?”

“I’d really appreciate that. I looked at a lot actually, in a lot of places, but the views there are real nice, good trails, it seems quaint, but the place doesn’t look bad. The agent I got in touch with said it could be reserved, booked the day, and said if I decide to go with it, we could start with the paperwork whenever.”

“In that case, I think we ought to turn in our glasses and try for some sleep before we make the drive, what do you say?” Steve would back Jensen, they were friends. He didn’t think it would be bad for him to reconnect with himself anyway, afterall, he enjoyed getting back to a peaceful place and working on music too. 

–

When Jensen turned in that night, he couldn’t help but feel a bit less tension in his shoulders. He was excited to explore a new chapter of his life. 

~~~~

She was just packing away her things, getting ready to leave the factory where she worked. Her clothes were caked in grease and dirt. It had been a rather long day, she felt exhausted, and still she had responsibilities awaiting her at home. 

“Hey did you hear what Jason did?” Gia, her co-worker, and ever energetic drama queen asked. Gia was always finding Noel at the end of the night, filling her in on anything and everything happening almost anywhere within the building. It was the most human interaction she had.

“I definitely did not,” she laughed,Gia was dramatic, but she was about the closest thing to a true friend she’s ever had. 

“Well, apparently when Mitch -the supervisor on line one- came in he saw Jason with Amy! Like, completely all over each other on the line. It was so gross-” she didn’t mean to zone out, but she knew Gia wouldn’t notice, and also that she knew how busy Noel was. Noel found herself picking back up on the tail end of her rant about their romping co-workers, “-but we can talk about that later. Oh my god, I totally didn’t even realize, I forgot my gear on the line. Love ya, later chick!”

“For sure, can’t wait! Be safe leaving. See you tomorrow.” Noel was anxious to leave. She almost ran to her black Ford, like it was a life raft. 

She pulled off her protective glasses, and face mask, throwing them into her door bin with a sigh. Tugging her short dark hair from its bun, she started her car and touched the dial on her radio; her hands were grimey, but it was normal. “Calling You” blared through the speakers, she had a good 30 minute drive home, and all she wanted to do was roll down her windows and enjoy the June breeze through her car. She wanted to feel the wind blow her locks around and hear the radio blare. 

Seeing mile markers and road signs getting closer to what she had called home for as long as she could remember; she turned down the long gravel drive, the grass patch growing between the worn tracks, a stark contrast to the concrete and asphalt she had been on moments ago. A long black wooden fence showed through to cattle, and her dogs followed along the fence row.

She got out making sure to give her pets some attention, not bothering to go toward the divided house, but rather straight toward the barn behind it. She flipped on the lights, and got ready to do what she needed to there. 

In all her chores, she had managed to forget that her realtor had mentioned someone coming to look at the vacancy tomorrow.

[theoseong]

The Runaway

Date: November 2017 and July 2021 Location: Rungung and Different City Characters: Theo Seong and Charles Seong (Robin and Ryder Astrea mentioned) Description: Theo leaves Rungung and goes back again. Triggers: death, grief and mentions of starvation.

November 2017 - Theo is 23 years old

Theo’s gaze shifted from the bus ticket in his hand to the packed bags and guitar in his bedroom, leaving his room the barest it’d ever been. It was now or never. His bus for Different City left tomorrow at seven in the morning, and he still hadn’t told his dad he was leaving. It got more and more tempting to just leave without saying goodbye. That way he wouldn’t have to face his dad’s disappointment. 

A bitter part of him thought his dad might deserve that. All his life, it felt like the damn diner meant more to him than Theo did. He never gave a shit what Theo wanted–never even bothered to ask. He just decided he was going to take over for him one day. Maybe, Theo should’ve told his dad the truth from the start, but it felt like his only real option was to just leave, because he was never going to accept the truth. His dad would have to now though, because Theo was going on that bus even if it broke his heart.

Sighing, Theo forced himself to stop stalling and left his bedroom, heading for the kitchen where his dad was sitting at the table, balancing the books. Without a word, he dropped the ticket directly on top of the book. His dad gave Theo a confused look and set down the pen, lifting the ticket to examine it closely. 

“Different City? You didn’t tell me you’re going on a trip…” He said slowly, and Theo could practically see the gears turning in his head.

“It’s not a trip, dad. I’m moving there. I know I should’ve said something earlier, but–”

“Hold on, son. Slow down. You’re moving there? What are you talking about?” His dad asked in rapid succession, pushing himself out of his seat to look at his son directly. He didn’t seem mad yet, just completely lost. Theo couldn’t blame him. He went about this all wrong.

“I’m twenty-three, I have all my certifications, and I have money saved from the diner. I’m leaving,” Theo listed off in a flat tone. For some reason, it felt like if he kept emotions out of this and just sprouted facts it would avoid the inevitable explosion, but he knew that wasn’t true. He could see it brewing in his father as his expression shifted from confused to betrayed.

“Leaving? What about the diner, Theo? I need you around here to help–to take over one day. This isn’t the plan.”

“Your plan, dad. This isn’t your plan,” Theo snapped, immediately losing all his sense of cool. “I hate the diner. The last thing I want is to spend the rest of my life flipping pancakes and mopping syrup off the floor. That’s your dream, not mine.” 

It was probably the worst thing he could ever say to his father, “I hate the diner,” but it was the truth. Theo held so much resentment for so many years that it festered into an ugly, hateful thing. His dad’s pride and joy felt like a prison to him, and he couldn’t stay here anymore or else he’d go crazy. 

Theo’s dad reeled back like he’d been slapped, his eyes narrowing into a glare. His cheeks started to flush red the angrier he became. He and his dad never fought, and he never saw him lose his temper, but he had a feeling that was about to change in a few seconds. 

“This is–this is ridiculous, Theo. You’re not making any sense. You never said any of this before. What’re you going to do in Different City? You barely passed your certifications,” his dad countered, his voice practically raising with every word.

“When was I supposed to tell you, dad? It’s all you fucking talk about! It’s all you care about. This stupid place is your entire life, and you just force it onto me. You didn’t even ask,” Theo yelled, his chest heaving as he got more worked up, “and I want to play music, by the way. You would’ve known that if you actually paid attention to me.” 

“Music!?” His dad shouted before letting out a humorless laugh. It stung more than Theo expected that he acted like the idea was a big joke, and it caused his shoulders to sink, but he refused to back down. He wasn’t giving up. 

“So, let me see if I understand this, Theo. You’re running away from home, abandoning all your responsibilities and your family, to play music? Do you know how many people actually make it as musicians? Do you know how much being a struggling artist pays? On top of rent, food, basic needs. You’ll starve.” 

Theo faltered for a beat, swallowing roughly around the lump forming in his throat. He knew it was a risk, but he spent so much time planning this out, and it was one he was willing to take. He couldn’t just stay here forever, because he was afraid of failing. 

“I won’t,” he shook his head. “I’m good at this. Someone will sign me. And if they don’t–well, I’d rather be a starving artist than a diner owner.” 

Theo’s father never hit him before, but he looked like he might as he took a step forward like he was squaring up to him, and he braced himself for the potential impact, but it never came. Instead, he pointed a finger in his face, his voice dropping low.

“I’ve never been so disappointed in you in my life, Theo.”

Theo knew it was coming. It was why he waited so long to tell him. It didn’t soften the blow though. His dad was the only close family he had left, and Theo just destroyed that. If Theo left, he didn’t think they’d ever come back from it. As selfish as it was, that was a decision he made a long time ago, and he accepted it. 

“Yeah, well,” he began with a feigned nonchalant shrug. “You don’t have to like it, but it’s happening.” 

Falling silent, he reached around his dad and grabbed his ticket from the table and stalked towards his bedroom to grab his stuff. His bus wasn’t until the morning, but there was no way he was staying here tonight. He’d stay at a friend’s house or find a hotel. His dad called after him, but Theo steadily ignored him as he shrugged on his guitar case and picked up his duffle bag. 

Theo had to push past his dad as he left the bedroom, avoiding his gaze as he walked towards the front door. His dad shouted after him the entire time, until he slammed the door shut and muffled the sound. Theo didn’t pause once as he jogged down the steps, afraid if he did he’d turn back and change his mind. 

July 2021 - Theo is 26 years old 

Theo woke up to the sound of one of his four roommates banging around in the kitchen, prompting him to let out a groan and bury his face in his pillow. He was still hungover from the night before after his band celebrated their gig with many, many shots. They probably spent more on drinks than they were actually paid, but that was pretty typical for them. These bars barely paid anything.

Cracking an eye open, Theo reached for his phone and checked the time, grumbling to himself when he saw it was almost two in the afternoon. His stomach rumbled loudly, but he ignored it for now. All he had left in the pantry was a few packs of instant ramen, and he was trying to make it last. He tried to distract himself from the headache and hunger by scrolling idly through social media, stalking a few old friends and exes. His profile was under a fake name, so he could look into people from his past without being discovered. There was a post that was a few days old from Robin and Ryder’s birthday. He let his gaze linger on Robin for a second too long, murmuring “cute” to himself before he moved on. 

Theo paused when he landed on a post from The Sunrise Diner. Most of their posts were just aesthetically pleasing photos of breakfast food to promote the place, but this was a picture of his dad with a lot of text underneath. It took Theo to realize the words at the top said, “In memory of Charles Seong.” 

His entire body went numb suddenly, all the sound from the apartment drowning out to a dull roar. He read the rest of the post without really processing it. His gaze landed on the words “passed away,” “heart attack,” “will be missed.” Theo didn’t know how long he stared at his phone. It felt like time stopped and his body slowly shut down, everything coming to a complete standstill. 

His dad died. His dad died, and Theo just found out through a social media post. His dad died, and Theo just found out through a social media post, because he ran away from home, changed his number, and never spoke to his dad again. One of the last things Theo ever said to him was that he hated the diner and he’d rather be a starving owner than a diner owner. Which was exactly what he was now. 

Theo’s hands began to tremble so violently that his phone fell and landed with a “thud” on his bare chest. He had no idea what to do. He’d been so stupidly stubborn over the years. No matter how much rejection he faced, how little money he had, and how poor his living conditions were, he refused to go home. He refused to prove his dad right. His dad died being disappointed in Theo.

It all felt so fucking stupid now. 

Without fully processing what he was doing, Theo picked his phone back up and checked his bank balance. He only had enough for a one way bus ticket and nothing else. Taking a deep, trembling breath, he opened the transportation website and hastily paid for an overnight bus ride to Rungung.

Whether he was a failure or not, he had no choice but to go back home. There was nothing for him in Different City, and there hadn't been in a long time. No family, nothing that really meant anything--just a band that wouldn't go anywhere and a shitty apartment. He should've done this years ago, but he let his pride get the best of him, and now it was too late.

Theo's dad was gone, and the only thing he had left of him was that damn diner.

[infinitelytheheartexpands]

Thaïs (La Scala, 2022): Reactions, Part I

another day, another olivier py production

yup! it’s an olivier py production alright!

the monks have apparently invested in neon lighting

despite this, we have some almost vienna levels of lighting

that’s better also why not use dreams as ways to estimate ETA i guess

LUCAS MEACHEM MY BELOVED!!!!

also what’s with the boys’ school uniforms

secondhand catholic guilt

this is not going to be the triumph you think it is, athanaël

“for the record: i’m telling you this is a bad idea”

it’s the little musical moments like these chords and texturing right here that make massenet a genius

very sleep much comfortable

athanaël: what the malarkey

“send help”

“STOP TAKING MY FOOD”

“dude litchrally i’m poor and you’re a monk aren’t y’all supposed to help the poor”

“i’m now going to physically assault you”

dude you didn’t even see thaïs. you saw a random woman without a shirt on. stop deluding yourself.

Area Baritone Sings Magnificently And Loves The Floor A La Jonas

(“savannah that is prostration, a catholic religious ritual thing.” i am aware. let me be a little facetious.)

bouncer in the house

Area Baritone Gives Entire City Bad Yelp Rating (while continuing to sing MAGNIFICENTLY)

nicias’ outfit is a VIBE happy pride month everyone

like come on. fabulous. (also this tenor is GOOD)

“well i’m homophobic so.”

when even the LEAD (ish) TENOR tells you not to do something, perhaps you should not do that thing

it’s giving cabaret vibes

“you think he’s a hot priest like fleabag?”

“i mean…”

“one, please stop. two, i’m a monk not a priest.”

“okay now it just feels like you’re making fun of me :/“

i always love this makeover scene (even though there really wasn’t much of a makeover here and also the tempo was kinda weird)

STUNNING BEAUTIFUL MAGNIFICENT ETC ETC MARINA REBEKA MY BELOVED

“tomorrow i will be nothing more to you than a name…” that line always hits different

he’s Conflicted TM

okay but for real aside from the scene itself, the music is just so HOT

“i get you’re trying to ruin the vibe but really you’re just making it more interesting so haha”

✨showdown✨

she reads him like a BOOK

THE SLOW KICKLINE HAHAHAHAHA

and a parting challenge!

[katoktm8]

3 miles in steps on bus

Decided to do a tour today. That will be the last tour of the trip. We were not going to do it at all, but everyone kept telling us this was the most magical the most beautiful the most wonderful the most extraordinary thing we will ever see in Albania. So curiosity almost did kill the cat today. It started after a night of drinking drinking drinking with a 6:30 AM two hour bus ride through the mountains. The roads were so horrible that my steps on watch clocked 3 miles just riding the bus. Then we got to a tunnel, and the police stopped us and backed up our shuttle van. I’m not sure what they did in the back, but we were free to move forward so we got to almost the end of the tunnel and the police stopped us again, and we all had to get out of the van and walk through the tunnel, see photo, we had no idea that we were actually at the ferry and the parking lot was just full. We all thought we were going to be walking back through the mountains in the hot morning sun. The tour was to a river ferry. This is supposed to be comparable to the fjords in Norway. But this was no tourist ferry, no Greek ferry, this was a working business ferry. So they loaded the three or four cars on, some motorcycles, cases of beer and food to be delivered deep into the mountains, and the rest people. So many people. Fortunately, Caroline and I were the last to actually find a bench seat on the second level. After that pushing and shoving and shoving and pushing, and people trying to squeeze onto our bench, and succeeding. People standing in front of us people taking selfies for an hour, it was an absolute shit show. The ferry ride was 2 hours long. We vowed that when we got off the ferry we would search around for a return ferry that was either smaller with less people or faster. We found neither. When the ferry docked we got off and turned right around and got back on because we wanted better seats on the top. so we ended up sitting on the top of the ferry for an hour until it left to go back for another two hours. Then onto the shuttle bus for another two hours through the mountains. All in all this entire tour took 11 hours. It was beautiful yes. But worth it. No. For me, total agony. The pictures of the day will tell otherwise.

I got pack at 5:30 PM. Caroline needed some quiet time. I needed some movement time so I started wandering the streets, found some cool doorways, and finally found the “café culture “that this city is famous for. Cool streets with tiny cafés lots of coffee drinking, beer, drinking, wine, drinking, hostels, galleries, And ice cream, of course.

While wandering I found a hotel grand opening celebration hidden in the back alleyways. When Caroline met me later, I said let’s go check it out and crash it. Which we did. And although they would not let us see the inside of the hotel, it was only for family to see, they invited us for drinks and food. So we stood around and had champagne, and Watched who is who in Shkoda Albania mingle. If Caroline had felt better, I could have convinced her to stay for the dancing and food.

we found a cute little bistro café and had an Albanian charcuterie tray? Waitress wanted to practice her American English, so you can see me helping her in the photo. Food was phenomenal. See picture. More dogs, a little wine, and back to the hotel. The restaurant at the hotel on Saturday night, tonight is all locals, dancing, singing, and having a great time. There is not a chance I will get to sleep before midnight because of the music and the crowds and the noise, but fun to hear and fun to see and fun to be a part of. Tomorrow we head to the coast.

[randomoranges]

Summer 2023 Retrospective

Once more, summer break has come to an end and once more, I am reflecting on everything that I did and that happened over the past 7 weeks.

This year felt – different. It was almost as if summer never really got into the real swing of things. The weather was a clusterfuck, what with forest fires, smog, rain and cooler temperatures. Every time it seemed like it was over, there would be another storm, another air quality warning and somehow, it impacted the overall feel of summer.

However, this summer was also filled with lots of visits from friends and family and adventures. Between people visiting me and me visiting them, it occupied a lot of time (in a good way.) There were highlights to the summer; notably, going to see the Back to the Future Musical, getting to see my uncle twice, visiting friends, making new friends, celebrating the Lizard’s 10th year, seeing the Perseids, and adopting a sunflower. I also got to go to many new places in the city I had wanted to visit.

On the other hand, there were also some downers to the summer; my dad getting hospitalised again, the never-ending debacle with my plants and the weather.

Yet, there were also so many smaller moments that were pleasant as well.  Out of the 37 days I had, I only had 6 days where I had nothing planned. (That’s insane.) I managed to go to the pool so many times, I did a lot of art and I read a lot of books. Even though I did not write at all, I still found other creative outlets, so I guess that counts. There are many things I never got around to doing, but I suppose that’s okay. Some can still be done post end of holiday and others can just be added to next year – hopefully.

I’m still not looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. I never like the version of me I become under the duress of teaching and it seems that no matter how hard I try, I lose myself in the process. But – it’s a new school year and at least, I’m doing the same thing as last year so I know what to expect. There is less unknown. Hopefully, that will help.

As always, below is my little list of things I did over the summer – an old habit I’ve kept for over a decade now. More for me than anyone else, but it’s there.

Here’s to more adventures!

Pool: 23

 Ice cream Hocheglacé Iconoglace Pineault Dolce Santanella Kem Coba Ca Lem

 Adventures Maisonneuve Market Biodôme Observation Deck Quai des Commencements PAC Old Port Au pied du courant Ave Mt-Royal JT Food Trucks Eye balls E’s wedding Dad Fiasco First Official White Hair TM Sugar Sammy Plant fiasco Bonjour Montréal sign Navette fluviale Berlin Wall World Commerce Building PVM Ring RAMQ Lézard Bizarre 10th birthday NYC-PVD-BST Dinner with J Gogol Bordello Power failure/playing Pictionary in the dark Sunflowers! Strawberries! Chinatown Food trucks Bota Bota Spa Nails Edmonton + camping Did art Dusted room Cleaned out drawer Perseids Esplanade Louvain Sunflowers One Started Fic and a half Adopted a sunflower Dinner at Schtroumpf’s Showed Dad how to work the laptop Tea at the Ritz

 People S visit Zia visit Les petites La gang du camp Uncle x2 S J + Fam Zia Edmonton gang T, M and errone else Schtroumpf and Aqua C

Food Chez Gérard Beaver Tails Usine à spaghetti Au p’tit doré Guillaume Les enfants terribles Oh Dumplings La beignerie Terrasse Nelligan Tea at the Ritz Bota Bota Spa

 Movies/TV shows/ Books End of Miraculous s5 Spider Man Nimona x2 Nimona comic Q Force Melting Queen Qu’est-ce qu’on a fait au bon Dieu ? Barbie x2 BTTF Musical Miraculous Lady Bug Movie Gomens 2 x3 Qu’est-ce qu’on a encore fait au bon Dieu ? Best Men Christmas in Wonderland Cowboy Bebop s 1 2 Staged s1 A Dash of Salt and Pepper The Gay Best Friend Heartstopper s2 Rose à l’île Red White and Royal Blue movie Red White and Royal Blue book Around the world in 80 Days

[sinceileftyoublog]

Purling Hiss Interview: Piecemeal Worldbuilding

BY JORDAN MAINZER

“It’s finally here. I can’t believe it.”

That was Mike Polizze over the phone, speaking to me last month about Drag on Girard, the new Purling Hiss album out now via Drag City. It’s the catchiest, most power pop-forward PH record yet, Polizze’s lead-rhythm guitar arrangements and the singalong harmonized vocals leading the charge on sci-fi songs vaguely about Philadelphia, paranoia, and everything in between. 

Drag on Girard seems like a return to Polizze’s skyward scuzz, after the dialed back, languid jams of his solo debut Long Lost Solace Find. In actuality, though, it was supposed to come out long before this year, just like the valiant “return” from Polizze’s other band, Birds of Maya’s Valdez, recorded in 2014 but released 7 years later. Polizze and company started tracking Girard at the tail end of 2019 and finished it in early 2020. Before he was able to do vocals and overdubs, the pandemic and lockdown happened. He eventually got into the studio in 2021, but delays in vinyl manufacturing backups and therefore test pressings, in combination with Drag City’s regular release queue, meant that the record didn’t come out until this March. “It seems on paper like a long break between Purling Hiss records,” the prolific Polizze said. “But the chronology was messed up.”

2022 was the first year since Polizze started his music career that none of his projects released anything. Because 2020′s Long Lost Solace Find was technically his last record chronologically, the world feels weirdly open. At the start of the pandemic, he and his wife moved from Fishtown in Philly to the suburbs where he grew up, and they now have a two-year-old child. “Coming out on the other side of all that is kind of a weird feeling,” said Polizze. “Now, I’m at an interesting point where there’s no big plan.” Even if the looseness of Drag on Girard is coincidental, you can see Polizze’s unbound attitude in everything from the way he’s honest about the piecemeal worldbuilding of Drag on Girard’s themes to the fact that he’s not currently working with a booking agent, planning shows himself. That includes tonight and tomorrow night at Union Pool in Brooklyn, with Chris Forsyth and Garcia Peoples.

Read my conversation with Polizze below, edited for length and clarity.

Since I Left You: Do you think the loose sounding nature of Drag on Girard was a result of your attitude to just have fun with it?

Mike Polizze: Yes, absolutely. We recorded at Jeff [Zeigler’s] again. I really wanted that “live in the studio” feel. There were even a couple songs that weren’t totally structured. The ones on the B-side are “let’s just have fun with it,” which is the spirit of the live stuff. I still feel like I want to go in that direction more. I wanted it to be off-the-cuff, not super refined. 

SILY: It almost seems to me like the punkier, noisier, scuzzier version of the same spirit as Long Lost Solace Find. Same vibe, different aesthetic.

MP: The solo album is pretty much just me, and Kurt [Vile] on a couple things, and [Drag on Girard] is with the band. It’s weird, because the songs are new to people now, and they’re still fresh for us, but everything got put on hold for everybody.

SILY: Have you been playing the Drag on Girard songs live for a bit?

MP: The first song, “Yer In All My Dreams”, had been kicking around for a few years, in the live sets since 2017-2018, and we cut it in the studio in 2019. I still can’t believe how much time has passed. “Baby”’s been kicking around for a while. “Stay With Us”, [too].

SILY: I like how the record traverses the different eras of guitar music. There are some of your usual influences, and the closing track has a Crazy Horse thing going on, but songs like “When The End Is Over” and even “Out The Door” has that jangle pop feel to it. Are you a fan of Flying Nun Records?

MP: Yeah, I do like that stuff a lot. I don’t really know where influences come from. I consider it like fishing. You have the fishing rod out, and you’re waiting for something to come along. That’s how I write. I didn’t set out to write like this on purpose. The placeholder name for “When The End Is Over” was “Power Pop” because it felt like Cheap Trick or Shoes or even Teenage Fanclub. But yeah, I love The Clean and all that stuff.

SILY: How did you approach the lyrics on the record?

MP: Normally, I’ll sort of find a song or riff and work off that and come up with parts just by jamming on them and seeing where they fall. Lyrics are usually last. I’ll have syllables formed over parts, and maybe a word or two will pop into my mind as a placeholder that presents a theme. When it’s time to really figure it out and I have the pacing and tempo and syllables and inflection, I think, “What do I feel? What kind of words can I conjure up for this?” It fits like a puzzle, with the guitar, then structure, then we practice over it and I sing non-words, then I go to the notepad. It’s less of a story and more nonsensical poetry. I edit from there.

SILY: There’s definitely a bit of sci-fi in here.

MP: [laughs] Maybe in some parts. “Baby” has some funny lyrics. “Drag on Girard”, too.

SILY: What about “Something in my Basement”?!?

MP: Yeah. It’s kind of like my joke to myself, like Little Shop of Horrors. Kitschy and fun. I didn’t know it was going to end up being about that. Little quips or slogans or titles pop up in [my] memory that I build off of. “Something in my basement” popped up in my mind, and the idea of a story there, and the end of the song is, “There’s nothing in my basement,” so the question is whether it really happened or whether it was all in your mind. 

SILY: Is it similar to your approach to the instrumentation and aesthetic, where your inspirations are a bit more subconscious?

MP: Yeah, kind of. It’s all right there. We’re constantly taking in information, and I don’t really think of the full idea first at all. I start scribbling, on paper or on guitar, then get a Voice Memo going on my phone. I used to just use my memory when I was younger, and then tape machines. But that is the formula.

I have goals, sometimes, or a general direction I want to go in, but the best thing to do for me is to improvise it and let it guide me and go for it. If I ever hit a wall, which happens all the time, I have to figure out how to navigate, so I keep it wide and vague and then hone in on it as I go. It’s not all figured out before I start.

SILY: Do you feel like this record is a balm when you consider how out of sorts the world feels? 

MP: It feels celebratory, in a way. We had fun with it. Truthfully, it was all written before the pandemic happened. I’m happy with it, for sure. It’s kind of like an opposite record from [Long Lost Solace Find], which is refined-sounding in my opinion. It’s structured, pretty even. [Drag on Girard] is pretty off-the-rails. I don’t know if it sounds that way. Just because it took so long to come out doesn’t mean we were in the studio the whole time. It’s pretty shrill in some parts. I tried to balance between raw and unhinged with pop sensibilities. It’s all over the place.

SILY: What’s the album title mean?

MP: It’s an inside joke between my drummer Ben [Leaphart] and I. When I first moved to Philly in 2004, I met him and Jason [Killinger] from Birds of Maya. It was the first time I moved into a house with bandmates and roommates. Fishtown was starting to gentrify a bit, but it was still an affordable place. Part of me is talking about the glory days of that, but I’m not from that neighborhood, so what right do I have? [In any case,] it was affordable and became this artist utopia with a lot of music people. It was a good time right around then, the early 2000s, with Espers, Jack Rose, Birds of Maya, Kurt Vile, The War on Drugs. Johnny Brenda’s was one floor, no food, draught beer, a hole in the wall.

Girard Avenue is one of the main strips/arterial routes that goes through Fishtown, along with Frankford Avenue. Me and Ben had our used crappy old vehicles. In 2004, I’d meet up with him and there’d be nobody on Girard. It was pretty dead at night. There were no cars on the road after 8 P.M. We’d joke about drag racing on Girard Avenue. It was an edgier neighborhood. Since then, Fishtown has totally gentrified: There’s no parking, it’s overdeveloped, there are all these crappy buildings, and there’s nowhere to move. This isn’t anything political or social, just a personal inside joke. It’s actually kind of stupid, but I thought the title had a good ring to it. Philly can be “a drag,” and there’s other imagery invoked in that. I like it when things have or could have more than one meaning.

SILY: This record is also a windows-down, blast from the car stereo record.

MP: [laughs]

SILY: What’s the story behind the cover art?

MP: I had lots of sketches, and I drew and colored with different mediums a lot before I moved out of Fishtown in 2018-2019. I haven’t done it much the past few years. Jason is an artist and graphic designer. I brought a lot of stuff to him, but we actually went a different direction. It’s not what the cover is now. We had a couple other ideas, and the cover that’s now is one of them. It matched the back cover idea, which we did have. I think we hit a wall. We didn’t really know what we wanted. I pitched some of my sketch ideas, and my bandmates liked it, and Drag City [did, too]. I liked it because I made it, but I don’t know what the world likes. Every once in a while, I’ll draw things that don’t make sense. Kind of like the sci-fi thing, [the] guy [on the cover] is sort of my catatonic space traveler suspended in the multi-verse, or something. It’s half-baked, and tied into Drag on Girard. It’s funny how I stitched together this half-baked story and imagery, this theme of sci-fi imagery and living in Philadelphia. There are these songs, lyrics, album cover, and album title, and I almost put together the story in reverse that way. We’re people and take in all this information every day, and there are probably people who are way more organized than me. It’s fun for me, and it feels multi-dimensional, going from the sketches to Jason and me working on it to Drag City. It’s not the order I expected.

SILY: Have you been writing new material?

MP: Yeah. It honestly feels great, and sometimes, I don’t realize it until moments like this where I get to talk about it. There are irons in the fire. I feel grateful I always have something I feel like I can work on because I’ve compiled enough ideas on my own. I’m working on another solo record; slowly but surely, you’ll see something there at some point. I’m so lucky to have the bandmates I have in Purling Hiss, I’m sure we’ll keep working on stuff. Birds of Maya wants to do some more stuff. I almost miss editing music in my 4-track and computer at home. Any free time that’s rare, I miss messing around with things outside of what I just mentioned. There have been a couple ideas with collaborations, but nothing I can speak on because they might not happen. I’m trying to keep things moving.

SILY: Anything you’ve been listening to, watching, or reading you’ve dug?

MP: I’ve been struggling to find time to read but I have a pile of books. Fiction-wise, I got True Grit. I got the SST [Records] book, Corporate Rock Sucks. Because of my toddler, I’m squeezed for personal time.

Since Wayne Shorter died, I’ve been on a jazz kick. My dad died when I was a teenager, but he played saxophone and started music school young and didn’t end up doing it because he had a family. But he had a pretty cool record collection. He left behind a bunch of jazz records, lots of Blue Note stuff. Lots of [John] Coltrane lately. I keep going through kicks, days where I listen to my own band practices and demos, and then I’ll get to the point I need to listen to other people’s music. Gábor Szabó. My dad had Dreams in his collection. Pharoah Sanders’ Karma. I really wish he had Sun Ra stuff. I know Sun Ra was between Chicago and Philly--we can’t take full credit for him.

[tropical-kabuki]

Get to know me better

No one tagged me because this blog has existed for literally two days, but I always like to try and answer these little quizzes and I found this one while searching for something else, so there we go.

Relationship status: Happily taken. Technically engaged I suppose... we don't care much for weddings, but people are very formal about these things and they need to hear an announcement of sorts to believe the relationship is going somewhere - so we made it official, that we intended to marry some day. But that was ages ago and we still haven't *shrugs*

Favorite color: reds, especially the darker shades like crimson or burgundy

Three favourite foods: chicken in (almost) any form. Homemade ramen (my partner is a fantastic cook and he's been getting more into Japanese and Korean cuisine since the pandemic). Homemade lasagna (I'm not a half bad cook myself and I'm a simple creature, I love comfort food).

Top 3 tv shows: NBC Hannibal, Parks and Recreation, Good Omens

Top 3 characters: I'll stick to the aforementioned TV shows because it will be impossible to pick just the three otherwise: Will Graham, Ben Wyatt, pleasedontmakemechoosebetweenAziraphaleandCrowley

What I’m currently reading: Technical books (programming) and fanfiction, mostly. Specifically The Last of Us (Bill and Frank) stories, and also a loooong fic that a friend of mine has been writing for a while (in a different fandom, video game related).

Song stuck in my head: "Pop! Goes my heart" (see below)

Last movie watched: Music and Lyrics (2007)

Last thing I googled: "Nick Offerman Sin City". I just found out via an old Reddit post that he was in the movie, something I definitely DIDN'T REMEMBER?!! But hey, now I have the perfect excuse to watch it again.

Last song I listened to was: "Cirice" (Ghost)

Dream trip: Japan. I know it's a very vague answer but I'd really like to make a long trip of it and visit as much of the country as possible, which is why I'm not going into specifics because I could basically go on forever.

Time: 1:38pm

Anything I really want right now: The adult, responsible answer: I'm unemployed at the moment and money is a bit tight so... a job. A job would be nice. The nerd answer: to play a video game I've been expecting for ages that is gonna be released in early access tomorrow. Or if we get into "that's never going to happen" territory, I really would love to give Murray Bartlett a big, biiiig hug (what can I say? I love the man and I can be a bit of a hugger sometimes)

[here-there-everyfuckenwhere]

Ohmygod you wanna know what I just realised??

Now I get to fulfill my dream of being one of those extremely extra Ao3 writers that updates their fic and puts a note at the beginning like “hey besties sorry this chapter is late I nearly died from covid and then less than a week later I nearly died in a car accident lol anyway kudos and comments are appreciated as always please enjoy :))))”

[zablife]

One Night Stand in Fightertown

Summary: You've just arrived in Fightertown and meet a mysterious, older man who intrigues you. Drunk and horny, you agree to spend the night, but what happens in the morning?

Author's Note: This is my first time writing for Cyclone so please be kind! Please note GIF was all I could find for smut, so please do not focus on the woman's attributes (Or the fact that she's wearing a fucking bra?!?! Wtf is that about? How's he supposed to suck your tits?)

Song they're listening to on the jukebox is Otis Redding's "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay."

Warnings: 🔞, smutty, smut, smut, very little plot, unprotected sex, impact play, daddy kink

“You sure I can’t take you to dinner, honey? It’s your first night in town and you don’t know a soul,” your father said in a concerned voice. 

“I’m fine, Dad,” you said with a laugh at his overprotectiveness. “I just need a night to myself,” you explained. 

“Ok, I know when I’m not wanted,” he guilt-tripped you. 

“Are you going to be this clingy now that I live in the same city?” you teased. “I’ll see you tomorrow for breakfast,” you reminded him before ending the call and shoving your cell into your back pocket. Heading back inside the bar your roommate recommended, you ordered another drink and meandered over to the worn out juke box. 

You bit your lip and tilted your head as you read the selections, trying to decide which tune to play. You finally chose a familiar song and punched the yellowed buttons with your index finger slowly, your buzz catching up to you faster than you realized as you stopped yourself from pushing the six instead of the eight. As your song began to play, you swayed your hips to the music, feeling pleasantly warm and happy in your own little bubble. 

Tonight was about relaxation and a fresh start. You needed to have some fun and clear your head before work started. You tried not to think about work now though as you stood by the open window, breathing in the sea air. You’d finally made it to California and you were going to enjoy yourself.

“Ottis Redding, nice choice,” you heard a deep voice say behind you. You spun around to see a dark, handsome man standing behind you and your jaw nearly dropped at the sight of him. He had muscular arms, a broad chest and trim waist, accentuated by the tight t-shirt and jeans he wore. It was casual, but stylish. The ruggedness of his jawline was punctuated by the slightest hint of stubble and you noted how there was tinge of gray there. You raised an eyebrow at him. An older man, you thought. This could be interesting. Not like the boys who usually tried and failed to capture your attention. 

“Thank you,” you said with a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. You didn’t want to appear overly eager, but his gaze was already making heat rise to your cheeks.

“I’m impressed that you know it,” he said continuing to compliment you. He stepped closer, placing his beer on the table beside you.

“Well, he’s one of my dad’s favorites so I sort of had to form an appreciation early on,” you rambled. 

“Ooh, hitting me with that already. How old do you think I am, sweetheart?” he said with a playful wince. 

You held your hands up in mock protest, “No, no. I didn’t mean it like that, I swear. You were wondering how I knew the song,” you said trying to defend yourself. 

He smirked at you and you saw a glint in his eye as he extended a hand to you, “No offense taken. My name’s Beau. What’s yours?”

“Y/n,” you said shaking his hand and feeling your hand slip into his large, rough grasp. He held you there for a moment, locking eyes with you and you swore his breath hitched. 

“Nice to meet you, y/n,” he said. “Now that we’ve established your taste in music and my age, let’s move on to something more important. You want to dance with me?” You nodded, placing your drink next to his on the table and held your breath as you felt him slide his arm around your waist. 

The rest of the night was a blur of drinks, easy conversation and several rounds of pool. You were delighted to learn that your skills were far superior to his and threw your head back with laughter as he cursed at the accuracy of your bank shots. Soon it was last call and Beau’s hand was on the small of your back. You didn’t hesitate as he lead you out of the bar for a walk along the beach. 

“I can’t believe you haven’t been given a tour of the city yet,” he said. “I was sure a hundred servicemen would have offered by now,” he said glancing at you with a twinkle in his eye. 

“Nope,” you shrugged. “But I just got in today.”

“Ah, that’s it’s then,” he said with a shake of his head.

“No, it isn’t. I’ve been around military types my whole life. I’m not the type of girl who swoons over a uniform,” you said matter-of-factly, staring out over the ocean. 

“Really? Well, what does make you swoon then?” he asked, stopping suddenly.

You turned to look at him slowly and placed a hand on his shoulder seductively. “Let’s just say I like men, not boys.” Leaning into him for a deep kiss you whispered against his lips, “Besides, the only place in town I’d like to see right now is the inside of your bedroom.” You felt him smirk as he ran a hand down to grab your ass. 

“You giving the orders now?” he asked in a low voice.

“We can negotiate. I have a feeling you know what you’re doing,” you said biting your lip. 

——————————————————————

You arrived at Beau’s house in record time and he escorted you inside with the urgency of a man who wanted you badly. He pushed you against the wall and removed your shirt immediately. You allowed him to pin you, wanting to feel his weight against you at last. It was as satisfying as you had imagined. He wasn’t timid, wedging a knee between your legs and pressing it into your throbbing cunt in one swift motion that left you breathless. He rocked into you as his mouth worked yours open in a desperate kiss, pushing your hands from your body. He grabbed your wrists suddenly and pinned them over your head as his tongue delved deeper into your mouth, exploring and tasting you as low growls escaped his throat. You moaned in pleasure at the thought of him ravaging you.

When he broke away, you raked your nails through his thick hair and pushed his head toward your neck. He began pressing kisses to your jugular vein and then your collar bone, not wanting to miss an inch of your delicate skin. “I’ve never wanted a woman as much as I want you right now,” he whispered in your ear, nibbling at your earlobe playfully as one hand massaged your breast. Unhooking your bra for better access, he leaned down to suck a nipple into his mouth and you nearly screamed at the contact.

“Fuck, I want you so bad,” you cried out wantonly. You felt him smirk against your chest and he scooped you up in to his arms, carrying you toward his bedroom. When you arrived at the meticulously appointed room, he threw you onto the bed and you squealed as you bounced off the mattress. Beau laughed as he lifted his t-shirt and threw it over his head. You gasped viewing his perfectly defined chest and ab muscles in the dim light. He looked as though he had been carved from stone and you pushed up on your knees, crawling toward him and reaching out a hand to trace your fingers over his cut lines. He grabbed your hand and began to suck on your index and middle fingers while gazing at you intently. Your breath caught in your chest as you watched his eyes darken, feeling your clit pulse against your jeans. 

Holding you by your wrist he instructed, “Lay back and show me what you like.” Then he quickly removed his pants and then your jeans. Now nothing stood in your way save for the tiny, lace thong you wore. You traced the delicate fabric with your wet fingers, then stretched it to the side to pump your fingers in lazily. You shivered suddenly and he asked, “Are you cold?” You bit your lip and nodded. Moving closer to you, he offered, “Can I warm you up?” You removed your fingers and watched as his large hand came to rest over your cunt. Soon you felt the warmth from his palm radiate over you as you struggled to breathe normally. 

You swallowed harshly, wanting him to finger you, suck you…anything but this torture of waiting. Finally, he leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss to your clothed pussy. It was so delicate and sweet you barely registered anything had happened. Was he joking? you thought. You reached out and grabbed hold of his head, attempting to pull him back to where you needed him most.

His reaction was harsh, jerking your underwear down to deliver a stinging slap to your pussy as you hissed in surprise and pain. He chuckled as he looked up at you, “Don’t be impatient, baby. Promise I’m gonna take good care of your sweet little pussy.” Then he leaned down to soothe you with a full kiss to your lower lips that felt so good you dropped your head back onto the bedding with a whimper. 

Diving in to take your clit into his waiting lips, he sucked hard, making you see stars. He treated you exactly the way he promised and as you bucked your hips into his face, chasing your high, you wished his attention to your sensitive bud would never end. You began chanting his name like a prayer as he lapped and sucked, adding his fingers to your pulsing cunt. The sounds of his digits entering your wetness, made the most obscene squelching noises, but you didn’t care as you raised your hips to him, begging for more. His fingers hooked inside of you in just the right spot and you began panting with your impending orgasm. “That’s it, let go for me,” Beau urged. “Cum on my fingers, honey,” he said as he stroked your walls expertly and that was all it took to make you come undone, crying out loudly and shaking beneath him. 

When you finally came back down to earth, you realized Beau was still holding you against the mattress with one arm across your hips. You hadn’t realized the force of your orgasm and rolled your head from side to side to shake the fog from your brain. What had he done to you? He rose from the edge of the bed and hovered over you to kiss you full. You tasted yourself on his tongue and desire set into you once again. You reached down to grasp him through his boxer shorts and felt how hard he was for you. 

Pushing up onto your elbows you tugged at his shorts eagerly as though unwrapping a present. As you freed his cock, you gasped at his size and licked your lips in anticipation. Running a hand behind your head he asked, “Won’t be a problem will it?” You shook your head and took him in hand, trying to close your fist around his thick length. He extended a hand to steady himself against the wall as you sat up to take him into your waiting mouth. You lapped at the precum that was leaking from his tip savoring the taste of him as you licked ever so slowly. Finally he took your chin in his hand reprimanding you, “Don’t tease me.” The sharpness of his words sent heat straight through to your core and you began taking him into your mouth inch by inch. He stroked your cheek with his thumb as he let out a contented sigh, but the moment of tenderness ended when he began thrusting. You relaxed your throat to take him as deeply as possible, but still gagged harshly on a particularly deep stroke, saliva dripping down your chin. Beau withdrew to give you a rest and you took the opportunity to raise up and plant your hands on his chest, pushing him to the mattress firmly. 

You swung a leg over his torso, mounting him before he could protest and sunk down onto his cock in one quick movement, closing your eyes as you relished the exquisite feeling of being stretched to the hilt. You lifted your hips and sank back down again just to experience it again. You released a shaky breath and felt Beau’s hand come up to brush the hair from your face. “God, you’re beautiful,” he said breathlessly. His hands rose to your breasts, rolling and pinching your nipples as you rode him. 

He couldn’t keep his hands from your hips for long though. He kneaded the flesh, sinking his nails into you and you knew you’d have bruises by morning. The feeling of his cock dragging along your walls was too good for you to mind. You loved the mixture of pain and pleasure melding as you took what you needed from him. You could tell he was enjoying himself as well, the way he looked up at you with an awe-filled gaze. 

Your second orgasm was building quickly and your legs were tiring. Beau noticed you slow down and took control of your movements, clamping his large hands at your hips and dragging you over him again and again. Just as you were about to scream out with your release, he lifted you off him and you were left panting and confused. “Get on your knees,” he commanded and you obeyed without question.

You stuck your ass up for him and he brought a hand down over your cheek, watching it jiggle. Intoxicated by the sight, he repeated the action again on the opposite side before rubbing a hand over your stinging flesh. “Please, please fuck me, Daddy” you whined in desperate need of relief, pushing back into him. And then you stilled, suddenly wondering what he might think of the nickname. 

Using a knee to spread your legs further apart, he chuckled, then replied, “What did I tell you about patience, little one?” 

Relieved and excited that he enjoyed your little game, you answered breathlessly, “I’ll be good, Daddy. I promise.”

You swallowed thickly as he teased the tip of his cock at your entrance and pushed the thick head into you with a low groan as he savored the feeling of your warmth. When he resumed thrusting, the pace was punishing, so much so that your legs began to tremble. Finally, they gave out entirely and you collapsed flat on your stomach, but Beau didn’t stop. He kept pounding into you, one hand on your hip and one hand intertwined with yours on the mattress. “Taking me so well, sweetheart,” he praised. 

Without warning you came around him and the feeling of your tight, velvety walls milking him was all it took to trigger his own release. He spilled inside you and you moaned at the feeling of his seed filling you to the brim. "Fuck," he groaned, hot breath hitting the back of your neck as the waves of pleasure engulfed you both. He kept his weight off you, resting on one arm, but stayed inside you a moment longer as he placed kisses along your shoulder. “You were incredible,” he murmured against your skin.

“You weren’t so bad yourself,” you said with a giggle.

“Let me help you clean up,” he said, uncoupling from you to stand and disappeared into the en suite bathroom. When he returned he gently wiped between your thighs with a warm washcloth and kissed you softly as he cupped your cheek. “Do you want to stay the night? I could use a good night’s rest with a beautiful woman,” he asked with a charming smile. You nodded and snuggled into his side, resting your head on his chest and carded a hand over his chest hair until you fell into a deep, uninterrupted slumber. 

————————————————————

You woke before dawn, an old habit having been raised in a military household. Dressing as quietly as possible, you glanced over your shoulder at Beau as you left still in disbelief of the incredible evening you’d had. You jotted down a note and your number on a pad in the kitchen before leaving for your apartment. You knew you’d have to rush in order to be on base in time for your first day. Shit, I promised to meet dad for breakfast, you thought. And you moved even faster to be ready on time. 

Miraculously, you made it and had an uneventful meal. After you finished eating, your dad gave you a tour and introduced you to a few people to make you feel welcome. As you were leaving to go to work, he joked with you that your normally pristine bun was a little out of place this morning. “Did my little girl have a wild night or something?” he teased, patting you on the shoulder. You nearly spit out your coffee before realizing he was joking. As Beau rounded the corner looking handsome in his uniform you were hit with a wave of shock and actually did spill your coffee. 

As you stooped to clean the spill with a napkin, your father greeted him. “Good morning admiral!”

Fuck, they know each other! Of course, they know each other! you thought, wanting to sink into the floor.

“Good morning!” Beau called out in a clear voice. Knowing you couldn’t avoid him forever if you worked on base together, you collected yourself and stood as straight as possible, giving him a salute. 

He saluted in return and said, “At ease, lieutenant…” then paused as he read your nameplate. “Bates?” he said looking from you to your father. “Any relation?” he asked nervously.

“Beau, this is my daughter, y/n,” your father said proudly. 

“Nice to meet you,” you said extending your hand a bit too quickly. You searched his eyes to see if he would play along and he did, allowing you to release the breath you’d been holding.

“I have to return to my desk now. Do you think you can find your way, honey?” your father asked.

“I think so. Thanks for breakfast, Daddy,” you said with a nod and he turned to leave you and Beau standing in the hallway looking at each other. 

Beau took a step closer to you once your father had left asking, “Warlock is your father?”

“You’re Vice Admiral Simpson?” you countered in a panicked whisper. “This is going to be awkward,” you noted. 

“Why would it be awkward?” Beau asked, pretending not to understand. He hooked his fingers into your belt loops and pulled you toward him slowly until you were flush with his body and tilted your chin up toward his smug face. “Because you call me daddy too?”

--------------------------------

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[fang-wife]

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

loft music | tamaki amajiki

➳ tags ;; mean!reader, sub!tamaki, teasing, mild humilation, degradation, unprotected sex, the petname bunny n fucktoy, sweet lil ending, there’s only one bed, oh no!

➳ wc ;; 2.4k

➳ a/n ;; speed wrote this shit at 6am and it’s currently 9am. i haven’t slept...

edit: reposting cause it didn’t show up in the tags </3 

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

He thinks you’re joking most of the time.

It’s to be expected of someone like Tamaki - all nerves, fear, anxiety. He isn’t sure how he’s supposed to believe someone like you actually means all the flirty things you say. Certain you’re making fun of him, he tries his hardest to let the commentary slide off his shoulders like he needs it too.

But it’s hard. You make him feel so frazzled. It’s so hard to pretend he isn’t bothered by your too close touches, the warmth of your breath, the feeling of your body pressed against his when you hold his arm on patrols. It’s like he knows - deep down, that you’re doing it to mess with him. He knows that you’re doing it to see him frustrated because you make that face when he squirms. It’s so evil and so mean and humiliating -

and so unbelievably arousing. It makes his breath catch in his lungs - his stomach twist and turn. It makes his entire body burn with desire and he hates it. He feels uneasy when he sees you - not knowing what thing you’ll do to string him along like before. There’s a restless that you’ve grown inside him - planted in his heart and lungs that he finds inescapable. He’s more afraid of it when you’re not there, on the days you don’t bother him at all.

He can’t understand himself. Why he’s so disappointed when you’re partnered with someone else on patrol. Why he goes home feeling extra miserable when you haven’t said something to push his buttons. It makes him feel like a puppy waiting for it’s master - downtrodden and depressed without your attention.

There’s the jealousy too. That bitterness in his mouth when that new rookie clings to your side with doe-eyes. It made him sick to see you pinch the newbies cheek with any kind of affection - ruffling his hair and throwing your arm around his shoulder.

It’s all unreasonable. And confusing. He doesn’t know how to feel about you and can’t determine how you feel about him. There’s not even anyone he can tell because how was he supposed to explain himself?

But he has to rid himself of this frustration somehow - manage it before he really breaks down.

{ ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ }

He knows for certain that being on this mission with you, alone - in this room with one bed, will not help him at all.

He cannot remember a time he felt this miserable. His heart damn near fell out of his ass when the receptionist told him about the mix-up. It didn’t help that he saw that little whimsical look in your eyes when you registered it. The faux disappointment and shrug. Tamaki doesn’t trust you at all, not one bit.

He figures he must’ve done something truly evil in a past life to deserve this. He’s expecting some kind of commentary from you given the whole situation when you enter the room. There’s a couch, and a desk. A singular lamp and a TV - and the bed is big but not big enough for two. Not big enough for you to sleep truly separate.

He awaits your commentary anxiously, as your eyes drink in the surroundings. He’s not sure what he’s expecting, but he knows it’s not you opening the curtains and staring out into the city.

“It’s really a beautiful. Shame we’re only here for a mission,” ― you sigh, stretching your arms and yawning ― “I’ll take the couch tonight, by the way. We should sleep soon,”

His eyes widen. Did he hear you correctly?

“Sorry, what?”

You turn your head and blink at him, head cocked to one side. You blink a few times before knitting your brows together.

“Hm?”

“Y-you’re gonna sleep on the couch?”

You nod.

“Yeah. You’ll be using your quirk a lot tomorrow, so at least for tonight - I’ll take the couch”

Tamaki isn’t sure what he’s supposed to feel about it. He knows it shouldn’t be disappointment. He nods dumbly.

“Oh.. okay”

“Cool. I’m gonna get washed up and head to bed - I’m beat”

He watches you slink off to the bathroom, dumbfounded.

{ ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ }

You’re putting on skin cream as Tamaki contemplates your proposal. The only thing in the background is some TV drama - but the words are blurring. His head is racing with a million thoughts. You’re not even fazed - seemingly off somewhere in your own world as Tamaki sorts his own emotions out by weight.

Everything else, reason, shame, anxiety - is drowned by the most unpleasant feeling of disappointment he’s ever experienced. He’s trying his hardest to understand it but every time he tries - his brain fires off into question marks. Why the hell is he so disappointed? Shouldn’t he be relieved?

But he isn’t. He feels so uneasy he wants to throw some kind of tantrum but he can’t. He’s changed into pajama pants and a loose white shirt - his legs crossed on the bed. He chews his lip nervously. Why does he feel like this?

“Uhm, y-you know you should.. sleep on t-the bed with me. Uhm, since - we’re both gonna be.. uhm, busy”

What is he saying? What is he doing?

You pause, turning over your shoulders with your brow quirked. You mask your amusement, straightening your face.

“Oh.. uh - you sure? Won’t that be uncomfortable for you?,”

Obviously.

“No!”

You smile at him.

“Then.. sure. Let me know if I make you uncomfortable”

And with that you turn away to face the mirror - finishing the rest of your skincare and putting it away as Tamaki anxiously sets alarms on his phone and adjusts his side of the bed. He tucks himself in before you do - with his eyes closed, listening to the rustling of your movement. He waits and waits for what feels like an eternity until your body weight dips on the other side of the bed.

He can feel you. Your body radiating a pleasant warmth - the smell of hotel soap and your skin cream and whatever detergent you always use. He buries his face into his pillow to try and mask his burning humiliations but his mind feels so blank. If he moves an inch your bodies would be touching - the lights are off but the city is bright enough that it doesn’t matter. Tamaki shuts his eyes and prays for something. Not entirely sure what, but something.

You move around and bristle against him - and he flinches.

“Tamaki, you okay? Sorry about that -”

Your voice has gone low in the night, soft and gentle. He squirms. Unsure what to do with this leftover frustration, he hugs his pillow to his body and buries his face in it.

“‘m fine,”

“.. You sure? You seem kinda off. You can talk to me,”

Your assurance is gentle. It makes Tamaki feel strange. You’re lucky he can’t see you because your smile would give you away. He’s so obvious it hurts you, but you play nice. You can be mean later, soon so for now  - you play nice.

He doesn’t say anything - doesn’t know what to do with himself. His cock twitches pathetically in his pants and he freezes. His body runs cold with a shiver. You turn to face his back.

Tamaki feels like prey more than ever. Like most predators, you know when to sink your teeth in. He’s not exception not really. You scoot closer to him, voice just a whisper.

“Am I making you uncomfortable, Tamaki?”

He can’t answer, but he shakes his head.

“No? Then what is it?”

You’re close. Too close. He trembles as your body presses against his back - let’s out a noise.

“Use your words, Tama - I won’t bite. Why do you feel like this, hm?”

Your hands hover above him. His body shudders. His voice hiccups, a sob deep within his ribcage pouring out of him. It becomes clearer than ever that he needs you to touch him. Shame blooms in his belly.

“I won’t touch you till you say yes” ― you sound amused, the kind he’s learned to recognize ― “If you want to go to sleep, just say the word”

He breaks. Shatters into pieces as a tremor tears through him.

“Please,”

“Please what?”

“Touch me, touch me please - can’t,”

Your hands come up under his shirt, pinching his nipples as you place a kiss to his shoulder. His back arches, whimpering as his eyes shoot open. Your breath ghosts along the nape of his neck, your hands settled at his chest.  

“Okay” ― you soothe ― “Turn around for me, baby”

Baby. Tamaki shudders as he flips over to face you. You reach over to flip the lights on - only a gap between you two. His brain feels like it’s melting - your face is so close to his own. You give him a small smile - eyes brimming with tears and expression burning red. You reach your hand to wrap around his neck and bring him towards,  kissing him feverishly. He moans when he feels your tongue in his mouth.

He kisses you eagerly, hands frozen at his side as your tongue explores his mouth. Outlines his teeth, brushes against his own - he melts into the touch. He whines disappointedly when you stop.

Your hand cups his face.

“You’re such a pervert, Tamaki” ― you grin, brushing your thumb against his lower lip befores ticking it in his mouth ― “Got so antsy without me. You like being teased so much?”

Not in a spot to deny it, he merely shuts his eyes.

“...why did you stop t-teasing me?”

You chuckle, kissing the shell of his ear as your hands slide up his waist, around his body.

“I thought you didn’t like it baby,”

He muffles himself, mumbling about how he didn’t think he did either. Your hand travels down, squeezes his hard cock from his pajama pants. Gasping for air, he moans and ruts into your palm.

“You like when I’m mean to you, Tama? Like when I make fun of you ‘n tease you?”

“Hnggh”

You hold a hand up to his mouth with a warm smile.

“Spit”

His eyes go wide as you blink at him curiously. A pang of shame hits as he spits into your palm weakly, watching through lidded eyes as your hand travels to his cock - just underneath his sweats. His hands fist the sheets as you pump him lazily.

“You’re cock is so red ‘n pretty, Tamaki”

“You’re ― hic ― you’re m-making fun of me”

“’s that why you’re so hard? It’s drooling all over my hand. You’re so wet - they’re gonna have to change our sheets in the morning” ― you tease ― “They’re gonna know how lewd you are bunny, so much keeps coming out when I touch you”

He shakes his head, grits his teeth. He can feel himself creaming into your fist, overwhelmed by your touch. His eyes are screwed so tight it aches. So lost in pleasure and the sound of your voice humiliating him.

“You like being my little fucktoy, bunny? Like when I treat you like a pet and play with you whenever I like?,”

“Aaah, aah - pl-please” ― he shakes his head furiously ― “can’t t-take it, please”

“Bet you’re gonna make the cutest face when I let you fuck my pussy,”

His eyes shoot open as he feels you scoot closer to him. You pull his pants down swiftly - your hand covered in pre-cum. He watches with wide eyes as you pull your own shorts down, a string of arousal trailing down your thigh. Tamaki watches it with hearts in his eyes, making you laugh deeply. It’s an affirmation that you meant everything you said - that he was making you like that too. It’s enough to make him sniffle.

He watches as you lift your leg up - tugging his cock towards you. It’s pretty - thin and long and so red it’s almost purple. Your cunt envelops it . Clit throbbing against the tip, Tamaki’s sure he’ll cum if he moves. You grind against him so slowly, bringing his face towards you.

His mouth drops open as you kiss him. His dick is twitching relentlessly at the way you gasp.

“Feel how wet you make me when you look all pathetic?”

“Can I please, nghh - can you please let me,”

“Wanna cream inside me, bunny? Wanna fuck me so bad you’d do anything?”

He nods rapidly. A silent scream leaves his mouth as you adjust - slide yourself right down onto his cock. You feel so much better then he could ever picture. Soft and tight and warm and wet - like pure fucking velvet. His hands dip into your hips for support. Through lidded eyes, he watches your hand come down between your thighs.

“I can’t, I can’t, I can’t - ‘m gonna,”

You feel him spurt his hot cum into you with a loud, broken cry. His throat, sored from exhaustion, doesn’t serve him any better when you start moving. Fucking yourself on his overstimulated, half-hard cock with face paced rhythm. Your fuckin his cum right back into you and he’s sobbing through the overstimulation. His mind feels so broken - so pliant and obedient.

“’s too much ― ! p-please, can’t”

“Shh, ‘sokay baby,”  ― you groan, meeting him in a kiss that manages to overwhelm him even more ― “Fuck, gonna cum, fuck”

The tension in your gut snaps like a rubber band and your whole body spams. Clenching down so tightly on Tamaki, he sobs. You’re whispering good-boy and other praises until you’re down and sobered from your high.

When you open your eyes - Tamaki is staring at you in amazement. His cock has gone soft inside you but you don’t bother telling him to pull out.

“You did so good baby,” ― you kiss the crown of his head ― “good job”

He feels small and warm under your touch. A blush forms on his cheeks, words completely failing him to express himself. You don’t make him. Brushing your thumb against his cheeks, you smile.

“I know I tease you a lot, Tama - but I really do like you,’

His eyes shoot up in surprise. He shrinks when he hears you giggle, flushing.

“I.. I l-like you too”

You chuckle, petting his hair and burying his face in your chest. You let your chin rest atop his head and nod.

“Then we’ll have to talk more tomorrow. Let’s sleep, okay?”

He blushes, embarrassed but content..

“O-okay..”

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

[9tzuyu]

home

warnings: talks of alcoholism and trauma

note: this is a vent fic coming from personal experience so yeah :p

+ two fics one day? crazyyy

ty moli for proofreading ‹3 no tags because it might be a sensitive topic </3

. . .

you were never fond of parties. they were always too loud, too crowded, too unpredictable – especially when there was a large amount of alcohol involved. it wasn’t so much that people were drinking, but how they began to act after drinking too much.

if it were up to you, you would’ve been locked in your room watching tv for the rest of the night, but tony harassed you all week about coming to the party until you finally agreed.

the music was loud, almost everyone was drunk, and you were far from having any kind of fun. you felt awkward, out of place. so instead of trying to socialize, you found yourself standing at the back of the room with a cup of water in your hands.

memories of your mother drunk and unstable were reeling over and over again in your mind. no matter how much you tried to focus on something else, teenage trauma began to seep through into your thought process.

all of a sudden you remembered how you were forced to be the parent instead of the child, how you had to fend for yourself a great deal of time, the selfishness of your mother every time she chose to drink instead of being sober enough to protect you.

“y/n?” natasha’s voice snapped you from your thoughts and you quickly plastered a smile on your face.

“hello nat.”

“you alright?” she asked curiously.

“yeah, of course i am. i’m at a party hosted by tony stark himself.” natasha giggled, taking a sip of her drink.

“they can be a little much at times.”

you nodded in agreement. the two of you stood in silence before you decided to leave.

“well i’m a little tired, so i’m off to bed. i’ll see you tomorrow.”

it was clear you were lying, but natasha didn’t want to push the matter. so she figured she’d wait up and keep an unknowing eye on you.

“good night y/n.”

. . .

you found yourself surrounded by the crisp new york wind on the roof of the tower. everything felt more at peace in contrast to the party. nothing was too loud, you had a nice view of the city, and you were alone. it almost allowed you to catch your breath.

“you’re going to get sick if you stay out here much longer. it’s cold and you’ve been up here for about twenty minutes now.” natasha’s voice rang through your ears. “i’m okay nat, it’s not too bad.” not a few seconds later you felt a jacket drape over your frame.

“may i sit?” you nodded and watched natasha place herself comfortably by your side. she said nothing, only taking in the new york view herself.

it was comforting, natasha was comforting. you could trust her with anything, no matter how bad it may be. she was like a warm blanket of security.

“she wasn’t bad, you know,” you began. natasha tilted her head. “who?”

“my mom.” there was a pause between your next choice of words. one natasha knew too well. you were debating, debating on whether or not you should continue sharing such a vulnerable piece of your being.

“she was never violent or anything when she was drunk. she never yelled or screamed at me. but she was clumsy, very, very clumsy…” you trailed.

“i feel like i have no reason to complain or call it traumatic because it doesn’t sound traumatic when i say it out loud. people have it so much worse, you know? so why do i feel so horrible about it? i mean, yeah, there were days, weeks, months where i had to take care of her because of how drunk she was, or because she fell and couldn’t get up. and yes, i was a kid, and i know it wasn’t normal, but it could’ve been worse.”

natasha adjusted herself to face you. she cupped your chin in her hands to look into your eyes. “you have every reason to feel the way you do. no kid should ever have to go through that. it doesn’t matter that other people have it worse than that. she was supposed to be the parent, not you. you were a child.”

“i know, but still-”

“don’t do that to yourself,” she cut you off.

you closed your eyes, leaning into her. “i just feel so stupid and normally it doesn’t affect me like this, but the party… being surrounded by so much alcohol and so many people drinking alcohol just reminded me of my mother.”

“it’s not stupid, please don’t let yourself hang onto those kinds of thoughts. besides, what made you go this time? i know you normally don’t attend these kinds of things.”

“tony wouldn’t leave me alone about it all week.”

“well that’s the last time he’ll ever do that.” natasha confirmed, adding a smile to her face as she rubbed your cheek.

“let’s go in and get you all warmed up, okay?”

“mkay.”

you followed natasha all the way up to her room. confused, you stopped in your tracks.

“this isn’t my room?”

“take your pick, your room or my room. either way i’m not leaving you alone tonight.” your face softened before you felt a familiar warmth in your cheeks.

“your room please.”

natasha smirked as she opened her door. “any particular reason?”

“i like the way you smell.”

“oh?” she raised her eyebrow.

“sorry, i know that sounds weird-”

“no, it sounds adorable.” natasha corrected, dragging you into her room. “you can change into these, don’t worry about returning them.”

“thank you nat.”

. .

you spent the rest of the night with your head on natasha’s chest, her arms wrapped around your frame. the memories of your mother were put to rest for the remainder of the night. you chose to focus on natasha and how beautiful she looked in the moonlight.

and then you had the realization that she was your home.

[choking-on-tae]

ATEEZ Reaction To: Going out with their S.O at 3 am because they can't sleep

Anon: Hi hi!! I've been having trouble sleeping lately and I was wondering if you'd want to write some reactions or scenarios for Ateez and their S/O being unable to sleep so they go out and have some cute fun like going to get food, taking walks or going to the park at like 3am and playing music and just generally having late night fun! If not that's okay too! 💕

-🪶

A/N: This is so relatable. I mean I need someone like this in my life and I think everyone does. Mentions of insomnia (obviously).This might be quite long.. As usual gifs aren't mine and credits to the rightful owners! x

Seonghwa

When Seongwa feels you turning for what feels like the 100th time he lets out a deep sigh as he sits up. Running his fingers through his hair as he turns to you. "Okay, we're going out."

You peek your head out from under the covers as you look at him. Eyebrow raised as you try to figure out if he's joking or not. "What do you mean?"

Seonghwa leans down until his face is mere inches away from yours as he says, "This obviously isn't working. And you can stay like this until it's time to get up only getting more frustrated, or we can actually do something fun."

You sit up straight as you push away the covers, letting out a soft yawn as you stretch your arms. "Okay, that seems like a good idea."

Seonghwa smiles as quickly gets dressed, you doing the same as you go outside. You've always loved going out in the middle of the night but don't do it on your own because it can be quite dangerous, but with Seonghwa you feel safe. Seonghwa takes your hand in his own as you two reach the center of the city.

Despite it being 3 am there's still a lot of people on the streets, which makes you feel more at ease. Seonghwa seems to notice as he watches you with a fond smile on his face. Not even 10 minutes later you pass by an arcade and Seonghwa's eyes lit up. You chuckle softly at his reaction as you pull him inside, getting some coins to use the machines as you make your way towards the claw machine.

Seonghwa watches with big eyes as you grab the remote and start to move it towards the plushie you've your eyes on. To your surprise the claw latches on and lifts up the plushie, bringing it to the hole as it falls throught.

Both of you scream in excitement as you grab the plushie, looking at it with a fond smile on your face before looking at your boyfriend. Seonghwa looks at the plushie the same way so you hand the plushie to him. His eyes widen as he tilts his head in confusion. "Wha-" "This is for you Hwa."

His lips spread into a bright smile as his eyes sparkle, looking at you full of love as he takes the plushie from you. He pulls you closer as he wraps his arms around you. Resting his head on your shoulder as he leans in to press a kiss against your temple. "Thank you sweetheart. It's so cute."

You turn your head slightly to be able to kiss him as you feel your heart flutter. "It's my thank you for taking me out. I really enjoy nights like this."

Now it's Seonghwa's turn to blush as he feels his heart flutter, placing his hand on your jaw as he pulls you in for another kiss. "You're welcome love. I really enjoy spending time with you like this."

Hongjoong

Hongjoong frowns when he sees your name lighting up his screen. He looks at the clock to check the time only to see it's 3 am. You're not supposed to be awake so he's surprised to see you calling him.

"Baby? Why are you calling me at this hour?"

"I can't sleep..."

Hongjoong feels his chest tighten as he hears your sleepy voice. You must be really tired. He rubs his face as he shuts down his laptop, this can wait. "Get dressed. I'll be there in 20."

He says, not waiting for your response as he hangs up, grabbing his things and walking out of the studio. Not even 20 minutes later he's knocking on your door. You open it, fully stressed but undoubtedly tired. Hongjoong pouts softly as he takes your hand in his. You lock the door behind you as you walk out of the building.

"So, where are we going?"

Hongjoong only smiles in response as he shakes his head. "You'll see."

The two of you walk around until you arrive at your favorite convenience store. The one that always has your favorite ice creams. You squeal in excitement as you run in, dragging your boyfriend with you as you stand over the freezer.

"I want this one! Which one do you want?" You ask, a bright smile prominent on your face as you wait for his answer.

Hongjoong leans over the freezer as his eyes land on one. "That one."

You nod as you open the freezer, taking out both ice creams as you make your way to the cashier. Hongjoong pays for the ice creams as you two sit down at a table.

"I was gonna pay.." You pout, staring at your boyfriend as you rip the packaging.

"I know, but since I took you out I wanted to pay." He says, flashing you his bright smile as he leans across the table to kiss your nose.

You giggle as it tickles as you feel your cheeks heating up. "Ah you're so cute when you blush!"

Now you're full on hiding your face behind your hands as Hongjoong's laugh echoes through the empty store. He leans across the table again as he removes your hands from your face, looking into your eyes as he smiles at you.

"You don't have to be shy baby. I think you're really cute like this. Even when you're dressed in comfortable clothes and not wearing any makeup I think you're beautiful."

Yunho

Yunho knows you've been struggling with insomnia a lot these days so he isn't surprised to see your name popping up on his screen. He just finished his schedule and was about to go home when he reads your message.

"Are you still in the studio? x"

He smiles softly as he reads your message, quickly replying that he's picking you up as he gathers his things. Not too long after he's standing in front of your door. Soon you open it, wearing one of his large hoodies he's given to you not too long ago. Yunho can't help but smile as he notices how cute you look. Unable to resist he pulls you in for a tight hug, resting his chin on top of your head as he gently sways you back and forth.

"You always look so cute in my clothes. Anyways, are you ready to have some fun?"

"Aren't you tired? You should sleep Yunho. Don't you have a sche-"

"-No I don't. I'm free tomorrow so let's have fun."

He says, grabbing your arm and dragging you with him. You chuckle softly as you follow your boyfriend to his car. Not even 10 minutes later you arrive at your favorite ice cream shop. The mean reasons it's your favorite is because of the insane amount of flavors, and the fact that it's open late at night.

Yunho parks the car as you two get out, making your way inside and ordering your favorite flavors. You're about to sit down when Yunho stops you. "There's a cute park nearby. I thought that maybe we could go for a walk while we eat our ice creams?"

"Yeah that seems like a good idea." You say, a bright smile evident on your face as you walk out of the shop and into the park.

You've always wanted to go to this particular park at night, but were always scared to do so because it's dark and could be unsafe. With Yunho by your side you don't feel scared at all and admire the beauty of the trees. There's a lot of stars in the sky that light up the park beautifully as you're walking through it. Your fingers laced with Yunho's as you enjoy your ice cream.

Yeosang

One thing you and Yeosang share is your love for food, so when you couldn't sleep he thought the perfect thing to do would be going out for chicken, so you did. You sit down in your regular seat as Yeosang moves to sit down next to you instead of sitting across from you. You raise your eyebrow in question when he flashes you a warm smile.

"I just want to be close to you."

You nod in agreement as you feel him wrapping his arm around your shoulder. The waiter comes up to you to take your order as you order some drinks as well. This wasn't the first time you went out to have chicken at 3 am. Since you've been having a lot of sleepless nights lately and Yeosang comes back late from his schedule a lot lately so you've come up with this solution.

Yeosang smiles fondly at you as the chicken arrives. Both of you are practically salivating as you reach for your chopsticks, grabbing a drumstick and taking a bite. You hum as you taste the delicious chicken. Yeosang chuckles as he too grabs a drumstick and takes a bite. His reaction is pretty similar to yours as a bright smile spreads across his face.

You chuckle when you see a drop of sauce on the corner of his lips and grab a napkin, wiping it away as Yeosang blushes softly. A deep giggle escaping his lips as he feels a little embarrassed. "It's fine! I know you're a messy eater."

Now both of you are laughing as you stare at each other lovingly. "Thank you for keeping me company when I can't sleep."

"Of course baby. I would never say no to chicken. And if I can eat it with you it's even more perfect."

You gently hit his chest at his cheesy words as you feel your face heat up. Yeosang feels his heart warm as he pulls you closer, feeding you another piece of chicken before grabbing one for himself. It's little moments like that that he cherishes the most. One on one time in the middle of the night at your favorite restaurant. It couldn't be more perfect than that.

San

There's two things that always make you feel better when you can't sleep. 1: Music. 2: San. So why not combine both? You texted San asking if he's still at the company while you get ready. Not even 5 minutes later you heard your phone beep. When you check it you see it's San saying that he'll be done in 30 min. Perfect. You grab your keys as you make your way to the company.

As you arrive you spot San already waiting for you. He smiles brightly as soon as he sees you and runs up to you, wrapping his arms around you as he holds you close.

"I missed you." He says, burying his face in the crook of your neck as he tightens his grip on you. You chuckle softly as you gently rub his back, pressing your face against his collarbone.

"I missed you too Sannie, that's why I wanted to see you."

San smiles brightly as he pulls back enough to be able to look at you. "Let's go, shall we?"

San nods as he takes your hand in his, pulling you with him as you enter the park. The two of you walk in silence for a bit until you reach a bench and sit down. San pulls out his earbuds as he hands one to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as he starts a playlist.

You rest your head against his as you listen to the music. San's hand finding yours as you hold hands while listening to your favorite songs.

He reaches in his pocket and pulls out some of your favorite candy. You squeal in excitement as you grab one, wrapping your arms around his neck as you press a kiss against his cheek.

"You're the best San. Thank you."

San smiles brightly, flashing his dimples as he pops one in his own mouth. Resting his head against yours again as he stares out in front of him, getting lost in his own thoughts as he holds you close.

Mingi

Mingi pouts when he listens to you talk about how you can't sleep again. Feeling bad for you since this seems to happen more often. It's then that an idea pops into his head. "Hey baby, do you maybe wanna go get some food?"

He hears you hesitate for a moment before agreeing. "Okay. I can't sleep anyways so why not."

Mingi smiles as he hangs up, quickly getting ready to meet you at the restaurant. He only has to wait for 5 minutes before he sees you walking towards him, a tired but bright smile spread across your face as you instantly hug him once you're close enough.

Mingi chuckles softly as he holds you tightly. Resting his chin on your shoulder as he just holds you for a bit. Happy to have you in his arms again as it's been a while since he last saw you. Mingi pulls away just enough to be able to look at you and leans down to press a kiss against your forehead.

"Let's go in, hm?"

You nod as you take his hand in yours, pulling him inside as you sit down at a table next to the window so you're able to look over the city while eating. Mingi grabs the menu as he looks over it, checking to see if they still have the special from last week. Thankfully they do. Mingi smiles brightly as he looks at you, pointing at it on the menu as your eyes land on.

"Oh my god they still have it? Let's get that!"

Mingi smiles brightly as he places the order. While you wait for your food to arrive Mingi leans across the table to take your hands in his as he stares at you with a fond smile on his face.

"You know, I hate that you're struggling to sleep lately but I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy spending time with you like this. In the middle of the night when there's barely anyone, and it can just be the two of us like this."

Your heart flutters at his words as you smile brightly, unable to stop yourself from doing so as Mingi does the same. The waiter brings your food, causing you two to cheer happily as the waiter chuckles. Telling you to enjoy your meal as you thank him, quickly grabbing your spoons and digging in.

Mingi hums happily as he takes another bite. You giggle at your boyfriend's expression as you take a sip of your drink.

"Mingi." "Hm?"

You rest your chin on your hands at you look up at your boyfriend, a bright smile on your face as you say, "Thank you for everything."

Wooyoung

Wooyoung always comes up with random ideas, so when you're unable to sleep and keep tossing and turning it seems like the perfect opportunity for something spontaneous. Wooyoung turns to face you as he pulls the covers down to be able to look at you. You open your eyes and peek up at him. "Why are you still up Woo?"

Wooyoung smiles brightly as he leans down to press a kiss against your nose. "Let's do something fun, since you can't sleep anyways."

You hum in response as you feel Wooyoung dragging you out of bed. The two of you get dressed quickly before going out. Thankfully the convenience store is still open so you stop by to get some snacks before going to the arcade. It's one of you guys' favorite places so the perfect place to go now.

Wooyoung instantly runs to his favorite game, which makes you giggle. You follow your boyfriend as you watch him throw in some coins and get ready to play against him.

Both of you watch the countdown until it gets the 0. You've a head start but it doesn't lake long before Wooyoung races past you, making you groan. Wooyoung chuckles in response as you continue racing at each other. Finally you're the one who finishes in first place. You cheer loudly as you watch Wooyoung groan.

He really wanted to win but when he sees your happy face he can't help but feel happy for you. "Good job baby."

Wooyoung hugs you tightly as you make your way over to one of the tables, getting out your snacks and munching on them. Occasionally feeding each other as giggles fill the arcade.

Jongho

Jongho is very caring and loving, so when you can't sleep he's over at your place in a heartbeat. You get out of bed and change into something more comfortable to go out. Jongho waits patiently for you to get ready as you head out to go to the park. Thankfully it's not too far from your place so it doesn't take long until you arrive. Jongho wraps his arm around your lower back as you two walk around the park. Because of a festival that's happening soon there's a lot of lanterns in the park, which makes it even more beautiful and scenic.

The vibe is much more romantic as you turn your head to give Jongho a kiss on the cheek. He blushes softly as he turns his head the other way so you won't see him blush. You're having none of it and turn his head to the other side.

"Don't hide from me! You're so cute when you blush."

Jongho blushes even more at your compliment as the two of you giggle. When you reach the middle of the park there's a bench surrounded by cherry blossoms. During the day the bench is always taken, but now it's midnight there's no one in the park.

Which means that you can finally sit on it, so you do. Jongho sits down next to you as he wraps his arm around your shoulders.

"This is very pretty, isn't it?" He asks, turning his head so he's looking at you.

"It is. I'm very glad we came here." You say, resting your head on his shoulder as you snuggle closer to him.

"So am I, thank you for coming with me. And if you can't sleep again at night, let's come here again. I really like spending time with you like this when there's no other people there to interrupt is."

[oro-e-diamanti]

Quiet Music: Scherzo (Chapter Six; Part One)

In collaboration with @bethanysnow

Dreams turn into reality on smokey breaths. Inner turmoil melts away with the touch from warm skin. Promises make the evening decisions go from complicated to deliciously easy.

Content | Fluff, slight smut warning, tw soft drugs (marijuana)

Pairing | fem!Reader x Damiano

Word Count | 4421

Taglist | @damianodavide @lizstans @unitersmoonshine @its-afucking-mess @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @vampirtet @lividisuigomiti @juststalking @tabi-toast @ethan-torchio-angelo @cheese-toastie-11 @thewitchinthemountain @ethanesimp @sofckinelectric @man3skin @daddydamiano @finelinejpm @superchrystaldrug @ginny-lily @everythingisdefinitelynotfine @nientedaridere @rainbowmarta @tiaamberxx @shaunthesheesh @enjcltaire @rocketqueen @aleksanderwh0r3 @damianodavidhands @megann-duff @teatrodellavita @coven-daddy  @till-you-scream-and-cry @solasullabarca @fanfictionandfluff @makapaka11 @slave4yourlove @geklutst-ei @marriedwithmarktuan @bookish0918 @mehrmonga @kanevill @butterfly-skinnylegend @lidiyabest @killerqueen1985 @ccweasley @bluscryn @deluxeplanteater @ohtorchio @messyhairday-me @bidet-and-legolas @maybanksslut @katyldamusic​ @fuckim-so-gay @demoiselle-en-detresse00 @petit-poussin @fedorable-killjoys​ @luvbadass​ @buttercup-beeee​ @navs-bhat​ @etaerealboyv​ @tryymebitch​ @mell-bell​ @fenhakwe​ @solacestyles​ @softforlukescurls​ @vicsangel​ @theimpossiblehologramtree​ @alina-exe​ @cherricola66​

***

Soft skin against his fingers. A hand running down his chest to his pants. Heavy breathing filling the room. The flesh underneath him felt warm and welcoming, hot to the touch and begging for more. Her perfume filled his senses as she pulled him close. Nails running down his back. Whispers of "amore mio, just like that", "keep going,” “cara mia, vita mia, please".

A “Dami, fuck” leaving her lips as his hand started gripping her thighs. Running between them, as she threw her head back, fingers tangled in his hair, pulling on it. Biting her neck. Coaxing more moans out of him, on a mission to make him lose his mind. She was heaven on earth. Supple breasts moving with every breath as he let his mouth descend on them, one at a time, desperate to consume all of her. Kissing every inch of her, exploring her until he knew about every curve, every ridge, every little spot of her body. He wanted to know all the secrets she ever had. Drawing noises out of her that he wanted to keep hearing for the rest of his life. Her hands on his shoulders, on his back, on his arse. Pulling him further into her. Letting his mouth wander lower, getting wrapped up between her legs. She looked at him with dark eyes, nodding, and he was ready to suffocate in between her thighs.

Wait, was he actually suffocating on her thighs?

Damiano woke up with a start, face pressed deeply into the pillow, restricting his breathing in a way that was much less sexy than the one in his dream. A circle of drool had escaped his mouth and dropped onto the pillow. Well, that's embarrassing, he thought to himself.

He was in the middle of pushing himself up and out of bed, highly aware of the situation in his boxers - only to be interrupted when a knock on the door startled him. Trying to wrap the sheet around him, suddenly overly self-conscious of his state, he hastened to the door, almost tripping several times on the way. When he finally unlocked and opened it, he just about let his head appear in the opening, awkwardly hiding between the door still. Y/n’s face was painted in confusion. He forgot how stunning she really was, his brain not even coming close to painting her image in his dreams.

“Yes, hi, good morning, I’m up! I’ll be down in an hour!” He was rushing to finish his sentence, not giving her a chance to reply before he let the door fall back into its lock. A deep breath out. Her face instilled in his mind like a photograph, unable to be separated from the extremely vivid dream he’d just had. He felt bad. He had essentially slammed the door in her face while wrapped up in a bedsheet. Not a very good impression considering he liked the woman behind the door. This was going to be such a long day.

***

“Why are you so awkward?” Victoria nudged Damiano as they had settled on a couch on the bus. He had been looking off since she had first seen him that morning, which was odd. Especially considering he was usually more of an early bird than the rest of them. “Sleep badly? Bad dreams? Good dreams? Or did you scare Y/n away again with another morning wood incident.”

Damiano’s face burned up as if suddenly ignited, making Victoria gasp.

“Oh my god, did you?!” She smacked his chest with her hand as she let out a gasp.

“I wasn’t even aware you knew about the first time,” Damiano mumbled, slumping down deeper into the seat. Crawling into the shirt he was wearing. Anything to get out of this conversation.

“Word travels fast on tour, you should know that by now,” she giggled, repositioning so she had her legs spread across his thighs. “So what happened?”

“I’m not going to talk about that with you,” he scoffed. Victoria’s grin only spread further, though. She was loving this side of Damiano more than she would like to admit - shy, awkward, unsure of himself. He was one of the best people she knew, an amazing frontman, a talented musician, a loyal friend. Yet with one little addition to the team he had turned into a quivering mess.

“You know I’m just going to ask Y/n what happened, right?”

“Yeah good luck with that, she didn’t even notice. At least I hope not.”

“Wait - so you hid your boner from her? I mean, at least you didn’t traumatise her again. What happened though, did you have some good times before the wake-up call?” She once again nudged him obnoxiously, loving how uncomfortable she was making him. “Did you have a wet dream? Did- Oh my god, you’re blushing, you did have a wet dream! Tell me everything! Was it hot? Did she go down on you or something? Did you see her tits?”

“Fuck off Victoria, I’m not telling you anything, now stop! It’s no like-”

“Hi! Attention, everyone! I know it's early and everyone is probably still asleep. But - announcements! That includes you Thomas,” Y/n said pulling the curtain of the guitarist’s bunk back so he could listen too.

Victoria noticed how their assistant didn’t seem spooked by Damiano’s presence at all - it seemed like he had been right after all. She hadn’t noticed a thing. If only those two would stop playing cat and mouse and finally do something, anything, she thought.

"Now, I know we're all excited about going to Amsterdam today, and I'm not looking at anyone in particular here," she explained as she shot a pointed look at Damiano that no one missed. "But I have one ground rule: no weed before the show. You got tomorrow off, so whatever you do after the performance tonight is none of my business. But god help you if I find you with a joint in hand any time before that."

She smiled, but Victoria had no doubts she would be deadly serious if it came to it. Y/n passed out a map of the local area, highlighting the Leidseplein in the middle of town, and in red circles were the venue, the hotel they were staying at, restaurants, and several coffeeshops, all within easy walking distance.

“Do with that what you like,” she concluded. ”As long as you do it after the show.”

***

The band had gotten to the venue straight after lunch, excitedly discussing some new covers they were thinking about playing that night. Soundcheck consisted of a number of conversations all at once, trying to figure out how to change the setlist. Damiano found himself participating less, instead, staring down at Y/n sitting in the audience. She was busy writing in her notebook, the seats next to her taken up by her bag, folders, and laptop. He knew she needed a break. They all worked extremely hard all the time, so it wasn't difficult to spot the signs of a fellow overworked person. He made it his own personal mission to get her to go out with them that night. Spend some time outside of work, see the city, anything that made her put her phone down.

As day turned to night, the concert loomed on the horizon. As soon as they hit the stage, it was clear it was going to be a good night. Amsterdam was the best kind of crazy. Going from Zitti e Buoni into Billie Eilish's Bury a Friend, the crowd went wild. Damiano noticed with amusement that Y/n was absentmindedly dancing along from her spot on the side of the stage as well. His attention had only been diverted towards her for a second, he was sure, but it was enough to suddenly feel something hit his head. Soft, red fabric.

"Was wondering when the first of those would come around," Damiano chuckled into the microphone in between songs, swinging the bra around a few times, before draping it across his mic stand.

Yet as much as the energy of the audience rubbed off on the band, all of them felt like collapsing after the show, feeling like they'd given it more than their all. A perfect chance to unwind for the night, in a way only Amsterdam really knew how. It was legal, after all.

***

“I am absolutely not getting high with you lot.”

Everyone was gathered in Y/n’s hotel room more or less uninvited. It seemed like they were dying to drag her along on what was supposed to be one of the best nights out on that tour. After getting ready, they had simply stormed in as soon as she had opened her hotel door. Now they were perched on her bed, her desk, and her armchair, trying to convince her.

“I gave you all a map to see where you could go. I, for one, would like to stay in my room, just me and my bed, and sleep till my alarm in the morning. That sounds like a brilliant time in my book.”

“Boring!” Thomas shouted, hurling a pillow from the bed at her that she quickly caught and threw back with much less force.

“If you come out with us, we’ll be ready before your wake-up call for the rest of the week!” Victoria tried to bribe.

“If you come out with us, we’ll have breakfast ready for you every day!” Y/n shot a look at Thomas, knowing fully well this was not going to happen. The idea alone made her laugh.

“If you come out with us, you can keep me company while the other three go crazy?” Ethan finally offered. She knew she was close to giving in, no matter how wrong it seemed to blur the lines between working relationship and friendship. She barely even agreed to drinks when she was on the job, and technically, she considered herself to be on the job 24/7. Yet these four had grown close to her heart so much more than anticipated.

Out of nowhere Damiano appeared next to her, slinging his arm around her shoulder. The way his fingertips brushed her neck as he did so left goosebumps. “Come on, darling, I promise I’ll take care of you.”

It turned out, that was all she had needed to hear.

***

The coffeeshop didn’t differ much from the usual pubs and bars; people stuffed in every corner, a low murmur of talk with the occasional loud laughter over the music playing in the background, tables full of glasses and bottles. Only the smoke lingering in the air, its distinct smell, and the relaxed atmosphere let on that it was a slightly different kind of place. Y/n made short work of weaseling through the crowd and securing a table at the far end of the place, just enough space to accommodate all of them, as the others went to order.

“Do you want one as well?” Damiano asked as soon as he had let himself fall onto the couch next to her, already preparing to roll a joint.

“I think I’m getting a second-hand high just sitting here. Maybe take a puff of one of yours, but I won't be able to finish one myself."

Damiano nodded, licking the inside of the blanks as he prepared his joint. Victoria came bouncing in like a tidal wave - her usual fashion - and crashing into the others already sitting down. As soon as Damiano was happy with his creation, she snatched it out of his hand, making short work of lighting it and taking a drag.

“Hey, that was mine!”

“Make another one,” she grinned, obnoxiously blowing the smoke into his face. Rolling his eyes, Damiano quickly prepared another one for himself, everyone now happy and content with their smokes, until only Y/n was left holding at a glass of water.

She preferred to observe the scene from her little advantage point in the corner like she so often did. The mellow music in the background was loud enough to underline the atmosphere but quiet enough to easily talk to everyone around you without having to shout. She liked this much better than loud bars in the evening. Most people were minding their own business, in small groups or pairs, some on their own. Victoria was quick to start chatting to a pair of girls sitting at the table next to them. She wasn’t going to lie - while not her usual spot, she didn’t exactly feel uncomfortable.

A hand appeared in front of her face, seemingly out of nowhere, and it took her a second to realise it was Damiano, trying to pass her his joint. She hesitated - still not convinced whether she should be smoking at all, but one look into his eyes only proved to her that she was weak to his suggestions. Parting her lips ever so slightly, she let him push the blunt between them, his fingertips grazing her. She took a drag, careful not to breathe in too much too quickly, before releasing the joint. Damiano pulled it back towards himself immediately, putting it back between his own lips, and she felt hypnotised. The moment came to an abrupt end when a cough took hold of her.

“Easy, easy,” Ethan soothed from the other side, his hand on her upper back. “Breathe.”

Everyone around the table seemed to be looking at her now, but she quickly got her composure back, holding up her hands in a gesture that was meant to signal she was fine.

“Fuck,” Y/n choked, taking a drink from her glass to wet her throat. “This is why I don’t smoke.”

“Wrong,” Thomas threw in. “This is because you don’t smoke!”

Y/n shook her head, giggling at the guitarist and the know-it-all look in his eyes.

“Up to try again?” Damiano whispered in her ear as the attention had finally ceased to be on her. She found herself staring into his eyes once again, a fluttery feeling erupting in her stomach at having him watch her so intently, at being able to capture his attention so easily.

The look on his face was enough to get her to try again. And again. And again.

She couldn’t tell how much time had passed, but for once, she genuinely didn’t care. The people around them had changed, old ones leaving, new ones arriving, but the music stayed the same. She wasn’t quite sure what the joke Thomas was telling them was about, but she found herself giggling along nonetheless. This was the best she had felt in forever.

Unaware of what she was doing, she leaned back, finding Damiano’s arms carefully wrapping around her, holding her softly. To her own surprise, she was sinking into him.

“Having fun?” He asked in a voice so low she barely heard it. A voice so soft it made her heart melt. She nodded, slightly twisting around in his embrace to look at him again. She couldn’t get enough of his face. She’d stay and study it for all of eternity if he let her.

"Have you ever seen brown zircon?” She suddenly asked out of nowhere. “It's a gemstone that looks like they made sparkly salted caramel bonbons from rock. They mine it in Tanzania, I think? Your eyes sparkle just like that." She grinned at the man beside her. "I can attest to that from this angle at least. It’s like the one scene in Aladdin! 'She's got these eyes, and this hair and…’ Ah oh god, what am I doing?" She couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous she was being. She found her face resting on his shoulder, completely content. His eyes never wavered from her face, listening closely to what she had to say.

Then Y/n watched her hand brush Damiano’s hair to the front, attempting to style it in a slightly different way. “Did you mean to look like Eren Yeager or was that some sort of subconscious coincidence? Not that it doesn’t look good, of course.”

“You watch Attack on Titan?” Dami looked down at her with surprise.

“No I don’t, but my friends do. So you learn the names of the people they yell at through the TV screen very quickly,” she laughed, remembering the way her friends would huddle in the living room, shouting at whatever the characters were doing wrong in their opinion.

“The more I get to know you, the more I’m convinced you’re my kinda woman, you know?” he mumbled, a smile grazing his lips. The more she looked at him, the more she felt her brain shutting off and her heart taking over. Or was it the high? She wasn’t interested in trying to differentiate.

Once again, he pushed the joint between her lips, holding the eye contact and it felt so much more intimate than it should have. It felt like her nerves were on fire. When he pulled his hand back again, she wanted to grab onto it, keep him in place, keep the moment.

I could stay in this forever, Y/n thought to herself.

"Also, I'm not religious by any means, but whatever God was responsible for creating you sure took their sweet time doing it…" The words spilled from her mouth before she realized she was talking, eyes flicking back and forth between his. "You know?"

She caught herself looking at his lips. A small blush grew on her face as she looked away. Staring out into the room, out at the people sitting next to them at other tables. Something distracting to take the rising heat off.

***

Damiano could feel his defenses wearing away. All ideas of staying away completely vanished into the smoke that lulled them in as he was holding her in his arms, her back leaning against his chest. He could feel her breathing, giggling at nothing at all, or maybe something Victoria had said but he hadn’t heard.

“If anyone’s been made by the angels, it’s you, amore,” he mumbled more to himself than anything, but she had heard him. Another chuckle running through her body. The atmosphere was fogging up his brain. He watched in amusement as he let a finger run up her arms, from her wrist to her upper arm where the fabric of her shirt began, and goosebumps appeared as if standing tall in a row. He tried it again on the other arm, getting the same result.

“What are you doing?”

She was turning around in his arms, just enough to look at him without removing herself from his embrace. He wondered if it was the dim light or if she was always this radiant. His hands travelled to the elastic that was holding her hair together and carefully removed it, eyes on her. Her hair fell around her face, framing it beautifully in its typically wild manner.

“I…” Her eyes seemed to twinkle as the light of the bar reflected back at him through them. “I don’t know.”

He looked away, suddenly insecure. What was he doing? He wasn’t sure. All he knew was that he couldn’t keep his hands off her, now less than ever. He wanted her. Wanted her all to himself. Wanted to keep holding her like this forever. There was no denying that.

“You’re sweet.”

Her voice took a second to get through to him, but as it did, he turned his head as if in slow motion. All he had wanted to do was look at her again, but that wasn’t what happened. Instead, her lips were on his.

***

All Y/n had done was lean forward to press a kiss against his cheek. Now their lips were meeting and she didn’t know how she had gotten there. She wanted to pull back - no, actually she didn’t. But she thought she should. Though the spirit was willin - to pull away, that was -, the flesh was weak. Delving deeper into his arms, she found herself kissing him like she meant it. Her hands found his chest, feeling the rising heat from his skin. Being closer to him than ever before was driving her crazy. His soft, warm lips against hers. Just the tiniest movements, as if he was afraid of breaking her. She let herself enjoy it. For a moment. That was all her brain allowed before switching back to the rational part. She pulled back in surprise.

She moved out of his embrace, stiffening at the contact. All of the twinkling lights of romance that had just appeared around them now popped as the kiss ended.

I just kissed my boss. I just fucking went and kissed Damiano! I am so, so fucked.

Yet, she couldn't deny that she wanted to kiss him again. And again, and again until they ran out of air to breathe. She looked back at him and the expression on his face said it all. His lids lowered, a small smile appearing on his face. Eyes twinkling in the soft light. He hadn’t wanted the kiss to end either. Either that or the weed was affecting him more than she had thought.

But as cold air started to seep in between them he blinked a couple of times, only now noticing that she had pulled away.

"Sorry - about that. I was trying to- I wasn't trying to kiss you. Well, I was - but not on the mouth. That would have been very forward of me. I would never. That's not me. I don't know how that happened - sorry." Y/n rambled on, unable to stop talking.

Damiano smirked, pecking her cheek. "Y/n, it's fine, you're fine. I turned my head and we kissed. It happens." He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. As if this was some sort of common occurrence. As if she was panicking for nothing. Was she?

***

Damiano desperately tried to hide the turmoil inside of him. It happens?! Damiano, what the hell are you thinking! Not the right thing to say in this situation! Now it just looks like you’d kiss anyone, great. He looked down at his hands, fumbling with his rings. Trying to get his breathing back under control. He needed to be cool.

"I mean - not that I didn't enjoy it. You kiss good!"

You kiss good? What the? That wasn’t even English. He was well and truly losing his mind.

***

Y/n took a deep breath, sitting back in her seat, making sure not to be as close to Damiano as she had been before. Victoria and Thomas had migrated to get more drinks and Ethan was deeply entrenched in some conversation with a man next to him. Luckily the rest of the band hadn't seen what just happened. Grabbing her glass once more, the cold wet condensation gave a stark contrast to her warm skin.

The kiss still left a tingly feeling on her lips. Quickly looking at Damiano, she met his eyes. He had not looked away yet, it seemed. She watched as he bit his lip in contemplation. Whatever was playing on his mind, Y/n didn't know. His words left her believing he wasn’t quite as put together as he tried to pretend. He certainly wasn’t making much sense. Although, she wouldn’t dismiss his compliment of her kissing abilities. She wondered if he would think similarly if they did it again, or did more than that…

Her wandering thoughts were abruptly interrupted by a loud crash. The culprit was quickly spotted. The middle of the coffeeshop, which had been empty of people until then, now had Thomas lying on his front, surrounded by liquid and broken glass.

Y/n didn’t hesitate, jumping up to offer her aid. The worry only lasted for a second though, until Thomas turned on his back, giggling maniacally. She barely managed to kick some shards out of the way before he could roll onto them.

She let out a deep sigh at the state of the guitarist, before quickly apologizing to the people at the bar.

“Everyone help me grab Thomas, I think this is our sign to call it a night.”

***

Y/n thought she’d have an easy time going to sleep. The effects of the joint were lingering, plus, the day had just been plain exhausting. Yet, as her head hit the pillow, she felt restless. Her mind kept circling around Damiano. The way he had looked at her. The way he had looked in general. She had seen him basically naked at this point, but she still thought about how it would be different up close and personal. She wished she had been able to read his eyes more. Had he been thinking about the same things she had? Had he wanted to kiss her again and again, get lost in that bubbling excitement of finally being close, finally let his hands wander to new places? She wanted to pull his hair. See what kind of sound would leave his mouth when doing so.

She wanted his hands and his lips, all of him really, badly. She wanted to know what he felt like when he really kissed her. What his fingers would be able to do to her. Biting and moaning. She desperately needed some release, wishing it would come from him, but knowing there was no chance, at least not tonight. Her hand wandered between her legs as she let her mind run wild. Imagining it was him instead, letting his fingers run along the inside of her thighs, exploring every inch of her. How he would treat her just right, hit all the right spots, do so much better than her own fingers ever could. The words he’d whisper in her ear, seducing her with his mother tongue, breath fanning her skin. How he would kiss her senseless. Feeling the rhythm of their bodies take over. Watch his tattoos start to glisten with a sheen of sweat from what they would be doing.

She found her release almost embarrassingly quickly, burying her face in her pillow. Her body felt more at ease, although her heart was still craving something more. She had almost calmed down, getting her breathing back under control. In a moment of clarity, she checked her phone to see when she had to wake up the next day, when the sound of a moan caught her attention. One that definitely wasn’t her own, but seemed to come from the room next door.

Damiano’s room.