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#I’m tired of the fact that I can’t even walk in my town without a speaker blasting off with ads for no reason
averyluckyclover · 1 year
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the birds that would greet you before school in 2005 are still there singing for you
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mvybanks · 1 month
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Imagine getting into a fight with JJ and depriving him of your touch and sex. Maybe you stay at Kie's or something, just to give him time to deflect on what he did wrong. And he's so sexually frustrated to the point where he could cum just by eye contact or hand holding. Like he's that down bad for you
the one where jj folds first (18+)
a/n: oh god that man won’t last long😭 this was supposed to be really short and then it turned out into a blurb (kinda) so enjoy🤭
warnings: sexual innuendos, explicit, not proofread 18+
“JJ, man, are you even listening to me?” John B asks his friend as he notices that JJ’s eyes are stuck on a fixed point — more specifically, on you. The brown-haired man rolls his eyes in annoyance before he adjusts himself on the bar stool. “Are you guys still in a fight?” He inquires, referring to his firend’s girlfriend. As a matter of fact, you and JJ have been going through a fight for over a week now, and he’s never gone this long without touching you before, which is torturing him.
You know how to make your boyfriend crumble and apologize first because you’re aware of all of his weaknesses: you. It might seem like bragging, but you’ve known JJ long enough to be sure that he can’t live his life without having his hands on you all the time. Perhaps you wanted to torture him a little bit more when you agreed to go to the only bar in town tonight, one where a little birdie (a very tired John B) had told you that he and your boyfriend would be.
Your tongue plays with the straw in your glass as you chat with Kiara, your best friend, although you’re well aware of the fact that JJ’s eyes are scanning your every move — from the way your tongue swirls around the straw to play with it from time to time to the sight of your exposed legs, caused by your bunched up dress. He’s about to combust, that much you know. After all, you chose to wear this particular dress for a reason tonight: it drives your boyfriend absolutely insane.
To be completely honest, JJ doesn’t even remember what you’re fighting about now, all he can think about instead is the way your fingers are gripping the cold glass in your hands and how your tongue licks your bottom lip to get another taste of your drink or the way your breasts are basically spilling out of that ridiculously small sundress. His jeans have never felt tighter. He swears the bulge in his pants is about to break his zipper from the lack of your touch. He’s used to have you all the time, hell, you live together, of course his hands are used to being all over your body any time he has the chance. However, now that you’ve decided to sleep at Kie’s to let him rethink about his actions, he misses the warmth of your body late at night and the feeling of your lips first thing in the morning.
The moment you decide that you can’t keep a straight and emotionless face anymore, you turn around to look at him, accidentally making eye contact for far too long. You’re set on ruining him for good when, as you keep playing with the straw between your lips, you wrap your hair in your free fist and move it over on shoulder, giving him a great view of your perfect skin.
He groans. He audibly groans in public, and he’s so grateful for the loud music because there’s no way people wouldn’t have heard him otherwise. He thinks he’s about to release in his underwear just by looking at you, that’s how bad it is.
Yes, JJ is absolutely losing this fight. Who is he kidding, really?
“I’m putting an end to this right now.” Is all he says to John B before he raises from his seat and walks over to you. As much as you’ve been teasing him, your heart is also racing at the thought of having him close to you after over a week of no physical contact. You need him just as bad.
Once he approaches you, he only leans down to get near your ear before he whispers just for you, “My car. Now,” and grabs your hand to force you down the stool, as you wave goodbye to a very confused, although amused, Kiara.
“I haven’t heard an apology yet, JJ, so don’t —“ You start when the two of you finally reach the exit and you can hear each other, but he’s faster and immediately interrupts you.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry about what I said or what I did, but I won’t lie to you, princess: I don’t even remember what we’re fighting about right now.” He takes a step closer to you, your faces inches away from each other as he rasps, “I can’t stop thinking about fucking you in this dress right here, right now,” his hands wander down your body, feeling the soft material of your clothing under the pads of his fingers, “And I swear, I’ll show you how sorry I am if you let me show everyone around here who you belong to.”
And let’s be honest for a second, in what universe would you ever reject this man?
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waterhousse · 10 months
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That Funny Feeling
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Pairing: bestfriend!ellie williams x reader
Summary: you slowly start to realize you’ve fallen in love with your best friend.
• • • •
“are you done?” you groaned, tired. the girl in front of you gazed up at you, eyes wide and eyewbrows up.
“does it look like i’m done?” ellie gestured at herself. you almost laugh at how sassy she looked.
“i’ve been posing for an eternity.”
“it’s been like ten minutes!”
“well, i can’t feel my ass anymore.”
“i’m sure it’s still there,” she said without even looking at you.
after a few moments of silence, you spoke up again, “you’re gonna have to pay me for this.”
ellie looked up from her sketchbook, completely offended. “is my art not enough payment?”
“i can’t buy shit with your art,” you deadpanned.
you had been so quick with your reply that an inevitable chuckle escaped your friend’s lips. “fuck you,” she laughed and you found yourself wanting to come up with an infinite amount of jokes just to hear that sound again. “hold still or i’m gonna have to start over.”
your eyes stayed on her as she went back to her job, unable to look anywhere else. you had always enjoyed watching her draw, founding it soothing. it also allowed you to study her and notice quirks only you could know about; the way she slightly frowned during the whole process due to the concentration and the countless huffs she let out, especially when she had to restart after a mistake. your favorite one, though, was when she sung. ellie’s voice was sweet, you had told her that many times, so you loved being able to hear it. she didn’t even notice she did it, the melodies just came out without warning.
“aaand, done.”
you jumped out of the big rock you had been sitting on for the past fifteen minutes and ran to her side, trying to catch a glimpse of her drawing, but she closed the sketchbook on your nose.
“hey, let me see.”
“it’s not ready yet,” she started gathering her supplies. you rolled your eyes at her. “stop that,” she muttered.
“what— i haven’t even said anything!”
“i know you rolled your eyes at me,” ellie said as she looked for something inside her backpack. you scoffed, but it actually warmed your heart how well she knew you. “c’mon, let’s go to my place. it’s getting late.”
you were currently behind the town’s barn, ellie had chosen that spot because, apparently, the moonlight hit your face just right. it was cold as hell that night, but being the supportive friend that you were, you decided to respect ellie’s struck of inspiration.
“i’ll show you the drawing when it’s finished, by the way,” she spoke up once you caught up with her.
“kay, well, finish it quick or else i won’t pose for you anymore.”
“fine, i’ll ask stella.”
you dramatically gasped at the mention of her. stella was relatively new in Jackson and the only person in the world you truly despised.
“don’t even joke about that.”
the fact that you hated someone that much was hilarious to her. it didn’t match your personality at all. you were the calmest, sweetest person she had ever met. besides, no one really knew why you hated her so much. even you, which was ridiculous. for some reason, everything that girl did or said annoyed you. you couldn’t stand her, feeling there was something off about her, but couldn’t exactly pinpoint what it was.
“i’m sorry, i’m sorry,” she placed an arm around your shoulder, bringing you closer to her. you tried to ignore how fast your heartbeat had gotten. that seemed to be happening a lot lately around her. “but hey, you gotta admit she’s not that bad.”
your heart dropped, “you’ve talked to her?”
“what? no. i just think she’s hot.”
you crossed your arms as you hummed in response, suddenly feeling very sick. there was a sharp pang in the pit of your stomach, so you spent the entire walk quiet, only answering to ellie’s babbling with monosyllables. your friend had noticed, so once you arrived at her place she grabbed you by the arm, making you turn around.
“hey, you, uh, you okay? i was kidding about stella. she’s not— i’m not interested in her, y’know?” ellie was nervous, but you were too busy staring at the hand that was stopping you from walking away and how your skin tingled beneath it.
“it’s fine,” you gave her a small smile, eyes back on her. “but i think i’m about to come up with a fever or something, i feel a little weird.”
ellie stepped closer, letting go of your arm and placing her hand on your forehead. “yeah, i think you’re hot.”
you let out a chuckle, “thanks, i’m glad you’re finally admitting it.”
your friend rolled her eyes before opening the door for you. she stood by the doorframe, waiting for you to go inside, but you hesitated.
“i think it’s best for me to go home—”
“what? no, shut up. i’m gonna head over to joel’s to see if he has some painkillers or something, you stay here,” she said as she softly pushed you inside her house. you opened your mouth as you turned around, ready to protest, but the sound of the door closing stopped you. letting out a sigh, you looked around to finally set your eyes on the couch, where you decided to wait for ellie as you tried to ignore whatever you were feeling.
you swept your gaze over the place, warmth spreading over your heart as you spotted little details that screamed ellie; a bunch of savage starlight comics, her guitar perfectly set next to the window, art supplies, books about astronomy and many, many drawings that were either on the walls or just laying on top of the furniture.
you spotted one of her many sketchbooks laying on the floor by her bed, so you went to pick it up and put it on her nightstand, next to the lamp.
after a while, you heard the sound of jiggling keys followed by ellie’s characteristic cursing. you got up from the couch and went to open the door for her since she was clearly struggling. ellie’s frown disappeared once she laid her eyes on you.
“you okay?” you asked, amused.
“this fucking door, i swear to god—” she mumbled as she stepped inside. “look! joel made you soup. i swear he likes you more than he likes me.”
you chuckled at the last part, “i mean, can you blame him?” you joked. there was no way he liked anyone more than ellie, but that didn’t change the fact that you felt incredibly loved and protected by him, too.
ellie gazed at you, a small smile hiding on her lips, “yeah, i supposed i can’t,” she almost whispered. “c’mon, get into bed,” she ordered.
“jeez, ellie. buy me a drink first, at least,” you said, missing ellie’s flustered state. it only lasted a second, though, because her usual smug smirk was already forming on her lips.
“oh, you wish,” she teased back.
maybe it was what she said, maybe it was the way she said it, but your stomach flipped at her words. it was such an unexpected reaction that it made you froze in your spot, completely startled.
“you’re gonna get in bed or…?” ellie’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts, she was holding up the covers for you.
“i can go to my house, you know. i don’t wanna be any trouble—” you said as you sat down on the bed. your friend pointed at your shoes and gestured for you to take them off.
“shut up and just let me take care of you, would you?” ellie carefully placed the soup on the nightstand. she went around the bed and sat on the other side just as you wiggled under the covers. she looked down at you, slightly leaning down, “you’re so stubborn,” she murmured as she passed you the soup.
you frowned, offended, “look who’s talking,” you bickered as you glanced up, but you weren’t prepared to see her so close. your eyes met hers, forcing you to avert your gaze elsewhere. you felt her stare still on you, making you malfunction. maybe that was the reason you took a sip of the soup without even considering how hot it would be. ellie laughed shamelessly at you when you burned your tongue. “shit!” you shrieked.
“i’m not saying you deserved it, but…” ellie teased. you would’ve pushed her off the bed if you hadn’t had a flaming hot bowl of soup in your hands, instead, you silently watched her take off her converse. she looked back at you, “move over, i’m cold.”
your breath hitched on your throat at the request, but did as she said. you kept your attention on the bowl of soup that warmed your cold hands, not feeling brave enough to make eye contact with the girl next to you.
“how’s the soup?”
“oh, it’s great. joel’s the best. remind me to thank him tomorrow.” you smiled. “want some?”
“nah, thanks. i don’t like soup.”
“what do you mean you don’t like soup?”
“i just don’t.”
“what’s not to like? it’s yummy.”
“i’m gonna ignore the fact that you just said yummy. and i don’t know! i just don’t like it.”
“weirdo. you’re missing out.”
“okay, soup’s best defender, whatever you say,” she muttered as she closed her eyes. you bit the inside of your cheek as you allowed yourself to scan her face, stopping on the freckles you had complimented so many times.
you looked away, leaving the bowl of soup on the nightstand of your side. the sound made ellie open her eyes.
“you’re gonna sleep?” she asked, her eyes were even more hypnotizing up close.
you nodded, suddenly losing the hability to speak.
“me too,” ellie said before yawning.
“hold on. you’re gonna sleep in jeans, you freak?”
ellie let out an exaggerated groan, “i don’t have the energy to get up and change. it’s too much work.”
“don’t be lazy, c’mon. i’m gonna change, too.” you began to softly push her off the bed, which eventually worked. she walked to her closet and threw you a big white t-shirt, it was the same one you always wore when you slept over.
you averted your gaze from ellie once she started to take her pants off, but it strangely took a lot of strength for you to do so. you shook your head and climbed up to bed, shortly followed by your friend.
“there, happy?”
“very.”
“great. oh, and try not to kick me so fucking much this time or i’m gonna have to fight back,” she muttered with amusement.
you let out a chuckle, “i’ll do my best,” you whispered before everything fell quiet.
you didn’t know exactly how much time had passed since ellie turned off the light, but you were sure it was a while. still as a statue, you layed next to her while staring at the ceiling, trying to make sense of how you were feeling. eyes wide, stomach in a knot and heart fluttering as if it were a butterfly.
you realized you had fallen asleep once you opened your eyes and daylight touched almost every corner of the room. you blinked a few times before you fully adjusted to the light, that’s when you noticed ellie’s closeness. she was almost on top of you, breathing into the crook of your neck. it wasn’t the first time you had woken up like that with her, but it was the first time you felt different.
“ellie,” you whispered. she whined in response, mumbling something inaudible. you felt your heartbeat race when she nuzzled further into your neck, feeling her lips touch your skin. you squeezed your eyes shut, noticing the unknown feelings from the day before were still present. “hey, ellie. c’mon. it’s almost eight,” you pronounced softly, but ellie ignored you. “i’ve got somewhere to be, y’know.”
“where?” she asked almost immediately.
“i told dina i’d have breakfast with her. i would’ve invited you, but i know you’re not a morning person, so…”
she complained once again, but eventually came out of her hiding. you almost laughed at her expression.
“were you born with that frown?” you placed your fingers in between her eyebrows, making her smoothen the lines.
“shut up,” she laughed softly. “and i could be a morning person, you know.”
“so you’re coming with me?”
“no, i wanna sleep.”
you laughed and got up, ellie’s eyes following you on your way to the bathroom until you closed the door. you stared at yourself in the mirror, suddenly feeling embarrassed because of the way your hair looked. ellie had seen you like that a million times before, but that time you actually cared about looking at least presentable for her.
with a sigh, you grabbed the toothbrush you had left once and started brushing your teeth. everything felt strange, but you tried to act as normal as possible.
after washing your face and brushing your hair, you changed into your clothes. you took a deep breath before getting out of the bathroom, trying to calm down the sudden nerves that attacked you, but the sight that welcomed you once you opened the door didn’t help at all; ellie’s bare legs were crossed on top of the bed, she had tied her hair into her usual half-bun and a few strands fell over her face as she drew on her sketchbook.
“i thought you wanted to sleep,” you commented, picking up your jacket from the floor.
“just wanted to add some finishing touches to yesterday’s drawing,” her voice sounded even raspier when she was sleepy. “oh, and i forgot to give you that jacket you asked me for the other day,” she said as she got out of bed and quickly walked to her closet, leaving the sketchbook on top of her nightstand.
“trade?” you held up your jacket, making her grin. she grabbed it from you and gave you hers, which you immediately put on.
“you look great,” ellie complimented you, a faint blush spreading over her cheeks.
“thank you,” you smiled, your voice sounding incredibly weak. “and thank you for taking care of me. i—” love you, you almost said, but for some reason, those last two words died in your throat. it was weird. even though you always said it to her, that time that phrase seemed to carry a heavier, still unknown, meaning. “i gotta go.”
you turned around to leave, but ellie called your name. you looked back at her and watched her grab her sketchbook from the nightstand. “here,” she handed it to you. just as you were about to open it, she stopped you. “wait! look at it later. i don’t wanna see your disappointment if you don’t like it.”
“don’t be silly, you could never disappoint me,” you sincerely replied. “but okay, i’ll see it when i’m home.”
“have fun with dina. not too much fun, though. you’re not allowed to enjoy life to the fullest if i’m not there.”
“i promise i won’t. see you later,” your eyes met hers one last time before closing the door.
when you arrived at your house, you saw dina already waiting for you. once she spotted you, she started frenetically waving at you. a laugh escaped your lips as you copied her action. yeah, two people with that much energy at 8 am would be a lot for ellie to handle.
“finally! i’ve knocking on your door for the past 10 minutes. i thought you were dead,” was the first thing she said to you as she gave you hug.
“sorry, i slept over at ellie’s.”
dina let out a chuckle, “of course you did.”
“what’s that supposed to mean?” you furrowed your eyebrows.
“you two are always together, i should’ve known. that’s all,” dina shrugged her shoulders. she decided not to comment on the fact that you were wearing ellie’s favorite jacket.
you opened the door and stepped aside, inviting her in. you followed her to the kitchen, where you put water to boil.
“oh, i saw your friend on my way here,” dina commented as she took out two mugs from your hand-painted cupboard. ellie had participated in the process too, drawing different kind of flowers.
“my friend? who?”
“stella,” she amusedly pronounced. you inevitably rolled your eyes, making her laugh. “you still hate her?”
“yes! ellie brought her up yesterday and i almost threw up, i’m not kidding. i don’t even know why i hate her so much, i’ve never even talked to her,” you sat down at the kitchen island while dina stood on the other side of it.
“uh, yes you have,” your friend frowned, confused. “you seriously don’t remember? jesse’s party a few weeks ago, it was the night after she arrived to town.”
you tried your best to remember, but nothing came to your mind. you remembered the party, but not stella. your lost expression must’ve been enough for dina to know that you actually had no idea what she was talking about.
“woah, so you were more fucked up than i thought you were,” she muttered more to herself than to you. “okay, so, jesse invited her because she was new and all that. you had a lot to drink, apparently, so you were already drunk when you approached her. you introduced ourselves and asked her if she had met anyone else besides jesse and us and she said she hadn’t, but that she had seen a girl she was interested in and she was planning on finding her. when she started describing her, we realized she was talking about—”
“ellie. she was talking about ellie,” you replied, eyes wide. the memories came flooding back, making you freeze for a second. “oh my god.”
“you totally snapped at her and told her not to go anywhere near her or you’d scratch her eyes off,” she laughed, but you were completely horrified. “yeah, you get pretty violent when you drink. in my opinion, it’s hilarious.”
“i remember the way she ran away after i said that,” you cover your mouth in disbelief.
the more you processed the forgotten information, the more you worried. that uncontrollable hatred you felt towards stella was because of jealousy over your best friend?
“i mean, i support you. you gotta defend what’s yours,” dina cheered, but her smile disappeared once she noticed your expression. “hey, you okay?”
“i shouldn’t have done that. i had no right—”
“hey, it’s okay. i’m sure ellie wouldn’t have been interested in her anyway.”
“she told me she thinks stella’s hot yesterday,” you muttered, eyes set on your own fidgeting hands.
dina stayed quiet for a bit, but you could still feel her staring at you.
“what’s that?” she pointed to the sketchbook next to you.
“oh, it’s ellie’s. she drew me yesterday and gave it to me so i could see it,” you couldn’t help but smile. you watched dina take it and look at the pages with a blank expression.
“have you seen this?”
“not yet, why? is it good?”
“well, yeah, they’re good. there’s a lot of them.”
confused, you reached over to grab the book from her hands. your eyes widened at the content. you felt your heartbeat increase by the second and a deep blush color your cheeks as you rummaged through the pages. you were on each and every one of them; smiling, laughing, dancing, sleeping and more. you recognized some of them, since you remembered posing that way, but the majority of them were ellie’s invention. you were left speechless at how well she had managed to capture you, down to the smallest detail.
“she may think stella’s hot, but i can assure you she thinks you’re the most beautiful girl to ever walk the earth. i mean, look at those. you’re her muse,” dina smiled sweetly at you.
“i have to talk to her,” you whispered before standing up. “i don’t wanna leave you alone, but—”
“it’s okay, dummy. i’ll be here, drinking my tea and waiting for you to come back and to tell me everything. take your time, though.”
with dina wishing you good luck, you left with the sketchbook in hand and ran to her place without even thinking twice about it. you ignored how dizzy you felt and the way your heart was beating at an abnormal speed. nothing else mattered, because everything suddenly seemed crystal clear.
your heart skipped a beat once you arrived at ellie’s place and saw her sitting on joel’s stairs, staring down at something in her hands. she looked up when she heard you approach.
“ellie—”
“i gave you the wrong sketchbook,” she whispered, staring at the object in your hands. you frowned, stepping closer to her. “you weren’t supposed to see that. i’m— shit, i’m sorry.”
“what? ellie, no. i loved it.”
“listen, you don’t have to lie. i know it’s really fucking weird and pathetic—”
“you wanna hear something really weird and pathetic? i scared the shit out of a girl just because she told me she was interested in you. you wanna hear the funniest part? that girl was stella. i drunkenly told her to stay away from you or else i would scratch her eyes out.”
ellie’s eyes widened, mouth slightly agape. worry had started spreading through your body. “what?”
“i forgot about that whole interaction but the anger i felt in that moment stuck with me to the point i hated a girl without even knowing why,” you let out an awkward chuckle. “i… i hated her because she thought about you the way only i can think about you.”
everything became a little too real since the moment those words left your lips, and even though a weight had been lifted from your shoulders once you made that confession, it was soon replaced with the weight of the question ‘what will happen next?’
ellie’s gaze softened, going from confusion to something indecipherable. was it pity or was it what you hoped for?
suddenly, she stood up. you watched her as she walked painfully slow at you, torturing you. once she was only inches away from you, she smiled. with a hand placed on your waist and the other on the side of your face, she finally leaned in and captured your lips in an agonizing, yet perfect, slow kiss. you melted into her touch, feeling as if you were about to explode of happiness.
it was what you had hoped for.
“i can’t believe this is actually happening,” ellie murmured, lips touching yours. she leaned back a little, allowing herself to look at you. her eyes expressed so much love you couldn’t understand how you went so long without realizing that.
“you’re blushing,” you commented, eyes sparkling.
“oh my g— why would you point that out?” ellie complained, but she wasn’t mad. “you’re blushing too, by the way.”
“shut up.”
you silently stared at each other with shy smiles. ellie caressed your face with her thumb and softly pressed her lips on yours, giving you one small kiss. everything felt so intimate that you had forgotten about the rest of the world, completely unaware of the fact that you were on the street.
“i was so fucking scared when i realized i gave you the wrong sketchbook. i thought i’d messed everything up,” ellie whispered, her eyebrows furrowing a little. “i’ve dealt with loss in the past, and even though it hurt like hell, i got over it. or at least i’ve been able to live with it, but losing you? There’s no way i’d make it.”
your heart fully stopped at her sweet words, “you’ll never lose me.”
“good,” she smiled. “y’know, i told myself to draw you whenever you were on my mind, just so i could do something with what i was feeling. turns out that i’m never not thinking about you.”
not knowing how to reply to that, you launched yourself forward, crashing your lips with hers. you could feel her laughing, making you giggle too.
“i was so nervous on my way here. i wasn’t sure if you felt the same way,” you let out a small laugh, lips a little swollen.
“what? the sketchbook didn’t make that clear?”
“well, i didn’t want to jump to conclusions. i could be another stella, you know, just some girl you find hot,” you bitterly said.
ellie grimaced, “yeah, about that…” she awkwardly chuckled. “i don’t she’s hot. i only said that because i was hoping to get a reaction out of you.”
you gasped, “ellie, what the hell? first of all, you’re a bitch. that was a low blow. second of all, well played. it worked. it made me sick, literally.”
“i thought that was a coincidence,” she let out a laugh. “am i a mastermind or what?”
you rolled your eyes at her gloating, “yeah, yeah. don’t let it get to your head. it’s already big enough.”
“hey!”
“kidding,” you pronounced in a sing-song voice. as happiness spread all over your body, you placed your arms on her shoulders and locked your hands behind her neck. grinning, you brought her closer and kissed her again, and again, and again, and again.
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ghouljams · 7 months
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Working on the ranch can't last forever. Gaz and Soap get their orders to return to the field. One of them breaks the news as soon as they get it, the other... not so much. Here's Cowboy!Gaz angst.
You stare at Kyle’s placating smile across the table, his thumb rubs over your knuckles, fingers tight as they hold yours. The devil, you think, he’s the devil. How can he do this to you? 
You stand from your seat, hear the clatter of the chair behind you without really hearing it, and turn for the door. You shouldn’t be upset, you hardly know the man, but he’s managed to creep past every one of your walls and make a home for himself in your heart. You knew you should’ve run, it’s always smart to run when you start getting visions of white dresses. You don’t run now. You stalk, stride purposefully, to the door and push at it. It doesn’t open. You push again with frustration, smack your hand against the damned thing and try not to scream at an inanimate object. Kyle’s warm hand reaches past you and pulls it open. 
“Let me,” He says quietly. You ball your fists and grit your teeth, shoulder past the partially open door and into the Texas sun. It’s childish to ignore him like this but you don’t care. You are childish, it’s why you’re so good with children, you know what it’s like to want to kick and scream when you don’t get your way. You cross your arms over your chest, hug yourself for comfort as you walk down the street. 
“Birdie, please,” Kyle follows after you, “I got the order, I can’t just ignore it.”
Of course not. You know that. There are enough military families in town for you to know the drill. For you to see the rotation of leave and tour, the ebb and flow of population. Why would you think yours would be any different? Because he didn’t tell you. You’d assumed his work at the ranch was just that, his work. You got so caught up in the excitement of a new… whatever this was, that you’d forgotten every foot that’s ever stepped on that damn ranch is clothed in tactical gear. 
Kyle grabs your arm before you can turn a corner and start making your way back home in earnest. “Talk to me,” He pleads, his eyes searching yours for any hint at what you both know you’re thinking. You don’t want to, you want to walk until you can’t walk anymore. You want to tire your body out so your emotions don’t have anything to hold onto. “Come on, doll, talk to me,” He tries again, brows drawn low. You’d almost think this hurts him as much as it’s hurting you.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” You grit out, shaking him off to keep walking. 
“Bird-”
“No,” You turn on him, “My friends get to call me that, you do not call me that, Kyle Garrick. You-” His eyes shine as he lets you yell, his mouth set, jaw clenched. You’re struck again by the fact that you hardly know this man as the wind leaves your sails. You don’t know his birthday or his coffee order, you don’t know what he calls his mom or why he joined the military in the first place. You don’t know what he looks like when he’s swallowing his emotions, but you imagine it might look something like this.
You don’t know why you imagined time with him, why you’d thought you had months, years, to learn about him. You can’t speak to why his leaving makes you feel like you’re losing a piece of yourself you didn’t even know was there to begin with. Kyle doesn’t waste his breath saying things he doesn’t think are important. He told you he was leaving because he thought you’d want to know, hell maybe he wanted you to know. Maybe he didn’t want to just leave you without an explanation or a phone number.
“I’m sorry,” He says, and you feel tears push at the back of your eyes, your throat tight, “I wish I could’ve told you sooner.”
“How long will you be gone?” You ask. He shakes his head, he either doesn’t know or can’t tell you. You swallow and nod, let him pull you against his chest and wrap his arms around you. “Okay,” You lean into him, feel him kiss the top of your head. There isn’t anything you can do to stop the wheels already in motion.
“I’ll be back,” He promises, it’s a hollow comfort. It’s as good as you’re going to get.
“Can I call you? While you’re-” While you’re off getting shot at. You don’t want to say it, but you think the feeling carries.
“Of course,” He reassures you, “and you’ll come see me off, right?”
“Obviously,” You hug him tight, he’s as sturdy as always but it does little to comfort you. You want to ask him to stay. You have no right to ask him to stay. You have no way to make him stay. You hardly know him.
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mycrayolamarkers · 2 months
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AITA for telling my five-year-old daughter we can't keep the marine that followed her home.
Now I need y'all to bear with me this will be a long story. Hey, guys, I (23F) am a single mother, now my daughter Eva and I live in a modest-sized house with a fenced backyard that was left to me by my parents. I work a job where sometimes I have to go on business trips During that time my neighbor let's call her Charlotte (50F) babysits Eva during those business trips. Now Charlotte is the type of person to sleep anywhere like on a bench park despite the sounds of screaming kids nearby.
Charlotte's home is quite large with no fencing and with woods; where we live is like a mix of a Slinet Hill-looking town and Red Grave City from DMC that’s like the best way I can explain it. Like an old town that’s been renovated to look more modern but maintains some of the old architecture. but let's get into the main part of this long-winded rant I’m doing.
I came home yesterday to find Charlotte asleep on her front porch with no Eva around. obviously, I woke her and ask her where the fuck my child was at. Turns out Eva was at a nearby park, I trust my daughter to come home safely given the fact the park is not that far from home. But imagine my surprise when my daughter comes home and guess who walks in but a fucking raven guard.
Not going to lie I froze but decided to wait till the raven guard was not around to speak to Eva. Which was harder than I thought because for some reason this raven guard was staring me down like I was a threat to my kid?! After what felt like years, acting like there wasn't a raven guard watching every move and action I did. Which lasted the whole day, I didn't know where he went but when I was helping Eva get ready for bed the raven guard was gone. I bet he was sneaking around my home.
From what Eva told me one day when she was playing in Charlotte’s backyard near the entrance of the woods. what was Charlotte during this time she was asleep on her rocking chair on the patio; apparently Eva tripped and scraped both her knees and of course being the child she is, began to cry and that's when she first met Mr. Eeyore. (the nickname Eva given the raven guard)
Now Mr. Eeyore would often keep Eva company when Charlotte was asleep or during the night time I don’t know how he was able to break into my neighbor's house without her noticing but then again, he’s currently somewhere around my house. Eva told him he could stay with us, which I had to break her heart saying he could not stay with us which led to a tantrum that lasted until she tired herself out. So guys am I an asshole for telling her we can’t keep him. I’m surprised they were even able to bond that fast in one week's time. I can really use everyone's opinions on this matter.
Inspired by @kit-williams and the Barn Anon and thanks for your opinion! ;)
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rubykgrant · 2 months
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(part of my story with Jon and Martin figuring things out while at the cabin; this was something specific I thought of before I even started writing it all out- Martin having a nightmare, and feeling emotionally drained after the fact, but Jon still comforts him... also, the first time Jon is openly affectionate in more of a direct way, and poor Martin doesn't fully grasp what that means in the moment. as always, inspired by the art of @lonelyslutavatar ~)
He wakes up.
Martin realizes what happened; sleepwalking again, another nightmare. He also realizes that all around him is a thick fog… the way it covers the hills around the cabin, you could almost believe this was somewhere near the shore. You could almost believe the distant glow from the town is a lighthouse.
Is this all from HIM? Did he bring the fog here, right out of the Lonely? Was it going to swallow him up, vanish him away? Then what- would Jon try to follow after him again? Another adventure into the lonely like that... it would KILL him.
Damn it… damn it…
“Damn it!” Martin’s voice comes out raspy (his throat feels sore and raw, like he’s been crying and shouting for hours). A terrible, painful sob breaks free, and he starts to cry. The hot tears sting his cheeks, and he realizes, there is frost on the ground.
He thought he was DONE being like this. Will he ever be done? He’s so sick and tired of feeling SICK and TIRED. He wanted to be better, he was trying to get better, but he keeps losing control, he keeps falling apart. Why can’t it just stop and be DONE?
Martin feels himself shaking, and it isn’t from the cold. His hands clench into tight fists, and more strained sobs escape. He’s trying so hard to stay in control, but part of him just wants to lash out, even though there is nothing here to lash out at but the fog. Right now, he hates the fog, he hates the echo of the foghorn he can still hear, he hates the salty sea air he smells, he hates the awful after-taste of oolong tea he hasn’t drank in years that lingers in his mouth…
“… Martin?”
Hearing Jon’s voice behind him makes Martin gasp. Not because it was too loud and startled him; because it is just so similar to the nightmare.
After a moment, he hears Jon walking, getting closer. The frozen grass crunches under his feet. They're both out here barefoot.
“Martin? You’re… you’re awake, now?” Jon asks, standing beside him.
Martin only nods. He can’t speak. His throat hurts too much.
“Is it alright if I touch you?” Jon holds up one hand, showing he intends to try and steady Martin.
Martin nods again, faster. His face is all screwed up in some helplessly unhappy expression, and if he had the energy, he'd be embarrassed over it. Jon wraps one arm across Martin’s back, lightly holding his opposite shoulder, and leans closer, pressing his chest to Martin. Jon’s warmth seeps into him, and Martin suddenly starts crying without being able to hold back. He brings his hands up, sobbing into them.
Jon hates that he stopped being so alert and vigilant; after the sleepwalking and nightmares seemed to stop, Jon let his guard down while they slept. Tonight, he didn’t even realize Martin had gotten out of bed… but then he rolled over, unconsciously trying to find the shape of Martin beside him, and then snapping awake when he realized the bed was empty. Jon panicked, a horrible idea of Martin just being GONE raging inside his head.
Then he saw that Martin was standing outside, like before… but this was also different. It was almost impossibly cold out. It may have been getting cooler at night recently, but this was like a bitter frost in the middle of winter. Then there was the fog. It was even inside the cabin. Like it started there, and followed Martin out.
As Jon holds Martin now, he feels the other man tremble uncontrollably, and realizes Martin’s knees might give out. This isn’t like the incidents when Martin disassociates, it’s more like having an anxiety attack.
“Martin? I’m going to sit down, OK? Can you come with me? I’ll help you…” Jon says softly, and as he starts to bend his legs, Martin follows him. Jon can feel some of the frost melt where he sits… oh well, he’s just going to have a damp arse. “You can lean over, if you- yes, like that. There,”
Jon is still a little behind Martin, so when Martin moves toward Jon, he’s leaning back into Jon’s lap, and Jon lets Martin’s head rest in the bend of one arm. Somehow, it isn’t an awkward position. Martin realizes he had been feeling dizzy, because now it stops. He’s still crying, but it feels more like a release of pressure rather than a violent storm.
Jon reaches up with his free hand, carefully brushing Martin’s hair out of his face. Once it is all combed away, Jon continues to run his fingers through Martin’s hair. He goes from the neck and up, over the curve of Martin’s skull. Jon is very mindful not to snag any tangles, or scratch Martin’s scalp too hard with his nails. He’s trying to give Martin something to focus on, something physical and pleasant… it works. In fact, it feels lovely. It also distracts Martin from the pounding headache that is trying to build.
“Martin…” Jon whispers, concerned but comforting. “Martin, darling…”
Oh. He’s “darling” now? Martin likes that, very much. He wants to hear “darling” all the time. He wishes he could have been “darling” years ago. He also likes when Jon says his name; the way it sounds like “Mahhh-tin”. This continues to distract him from spiraling further into more thoughts of self-loathing. He really must be emotionally spent right now, because he can’t even focus on why he’s upset anymore. He still FEELS upset, and weak, and worn out, but… Jon is warm, and his voice is nice, and he keeps stroking Martin’s hair, and all that is pretty good. OK, Martin is REALLY spaced-out right now. He’s just barely aware enough to acknowledge that.
At last, Martin seems to be breathing normally again. Each inhale of air doesn’t burn, or feel like it will break his ribs.
“Martin, are you ready to go inside? If you can stand up, I’ll help get us back there…” Jon tells him, giving Martin a light squeeze with his arm.
Martin thinks that sounds like a good idea. He’s glad Jon is here to have good ideas. He starts to sit up, and gets dizzy again. Well, it’s also good that Jon is here to help. Just like he said he would. Jon supports Martin’s wight as they both stand, and wraps both arms around Martin’s middle when they turn, slowly walking toward the cabin.
This must have been what it was like when they first arrived… except Martin is paying much more attention to what is happening. Jon is so determined to not falter or stumble as he half-way carries Martin to the porch and up the steps. His expression is very serious. This strikes Martin as funny for some reason… well, maybe not “funny” exactly, but somehow amusing and endearing. Somewhere in the back of Martin’s mind, he recognizes that this is different from before, because Jon had also been TERRIFIED, but right now seems so calm. That’s funny, too. Or amusing. Or endearing. Martin still can’t fully react to the emotions he has, but he thinks he’d smile if he could.
Once Jon gets them inside, he helps Martin sit down on the couch, and then- then he’s just GONE. Where did he go? Why would he leave like this? Martin keeps losing focus, so he’s not sure how long he actually waits, but each time he is aware again, he is still ALONE, and he doesn’t like it.
“Jon?” Martin finally manages to articulate a word, Jon’s name, and it comes out as a sad little whine.
“I’m here- sorry, I didn’t mean to be gone so long. I thought this would help,” Jon comes around the side of the couch, and he is holding something in one hand, with something else tucked under his arm. Martin doesn’t care about either of these things, he just cares that he had been ABANDONED.
Martin pathetically leans toward Jon, before the other man is able to sit and get settled. Jon hurries to put aside the thing under his arm, which turns out to be a blanket from the bed, and place the other thing on the table, which turns out to be a hot cup of tea. He’s a bit surprised Martin is so “clingy”. He expected Martin would need space, and a moment to recover without any stimulation that might make him feel overwhelmed or suffocated. Well, Jon will just have to adapt.
Martin doesn’t reach out, he only presses his head into Jon’s shoulder, and slumps against him. Jon tries his best to give Martin a hug that isn’t too hard, but still lets Martin feel that Jon is HERE. They both are. When Martin straightens up a bit, Jon offers him the tea; Jon specifically picked a flavor he knows Martin likes without any milk or sugar, so all Jon needed to do was heat the water up and let it steep.
When Martin recognizes what Jon has presented him with, he takes the teacup in both hands, and slowly begins to drink. It warms him all the way to his bones, but with how hazy his thoughts are, it just makes Martin think the heat is coming from Jon again… which is very nice. Jon is making him warm, and it doesn’t hurt, and Jon is getting rid of the lingering oolong taste, this white tea is much better, and Jon is rubbing his back, which helps with that dizzy-queasy sensation, and if Jon would just STAY HERE everything would be fine… and maybe stroke Martin’s hair again… and maybe say his name, or that other word, Martin can’t quite recall what it was, but he wouldn’t mind at all if Jon kept calling him that, like it was his NEW name…
Martin finishes the tea, and Jon takes the cup, putting it on the table again. Martin almost immediately presses back into him.
“Don’t… don’t leave again…” Martin murmurs. He wishes he had the strength to make this sound like an order (Don't you DARE go away).
“I won’t,” Jon promises, only turning away slightly to grab the blanket. He opens it up, wrapping it around Martin, and then leans back until he is resting his head on a pillow propped up against the arm of the couch. Martin chases after him, stretching his legs out, down the length of the couch, snuggling closer, until his forehead is in the crook of Jon’s neck. Jon hums as if in approval, and Martin can feel the vibration. “I’m staying right here, darling…”
Oh, that was it. He’s glad Jon does what he wants, even when he can’t ask for it. Martin lets out a sigh, feeling cozy and safe, and easily falls into a deep sleep. Jon, however, stays awake for a long time…
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ktelova · 2 years
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Things We Won't Do
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Pairing: Robin Buckley x Harrington!Reader
Warnings: Death, grief and it's overall pretty sad.
Summary: She never thought it would end like this. She didn't think there would ever be a last and she didn't expect to be crying over all the things she'll never get to do with you. She didn't think there would be an after you.
Word Count: 1,584
A/N: Sorry I haven't posted in a while! This is my first stranger things fic! It's pretty sad, but I hope you enjoy!
I do NOT give anyone permission to repost or translate any of my works on any platform.
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Robin wasn’t trying to avoid Steve, really. She was just trying to avoid any reminder of you, which unfortunately for Steve, being your brother kind of put him on that list. It had been a few weeks since your funeral and Robin felt that she buried a piece of her too. 
Robin and Steve didn’t say much to each other at the funeral. You were dead, they both lost the most important person in their lives, what more was there to say? Talking about it wasn’t going to bring you back, they couldn’t love you back to life. It didn’t matter what they said, it wasn’t going to change the facts, you were gone and you were never coming back. 
She had thought about going to visit you, she really wanted to but she felt like that would really make it real. If she never went to your grave, she could pretend you were just out of town, that you’d be home soon. Although she knew that wasn’t true, especially when she came across your things scattered throughout the apartment you two once shared.
It made her quite sad when she realized she hadn’t really cried at your funeral. She was numb that day and it didn’t hit her that she would never see you again until right now. This very moment as she looked at your hoodie hanging over the chair in the living room. She ran her hand across the soft fabric as her vision began to go blurry. She imagined you wearing it as she sat on your lap and you brushed her hair behind her ear, smiling brightly at her. It hit her all at once that she would never do any of that with you again. She would never see you smile or hear you laugh again.
A sudden knock at the door shook Robin from her thoughts as she quickly dried her tears and put on a fake smile, ready to greet whoever was on the other side. She was shocked to see Nancy standing in her doorway.
She must have noticed her spacing out too, because she didn’t even ask if it was okay to come in. This snapped Robin out of her thoughts immediately as she noticed Nancy walk right into her apartment.
“Hey! Sorry,” she moved aside, “I’m just in my head, I guess.” She looked at the ground and frowned. She was tired of pretending.
“Yeah,” Nancy frowned as she went to sit down on the sofa. Her eyes landed on your hoodie that was laid over the chair and she felt a pit in her stomach as she thought about you. She realized then that there were still a lot of your things scattered around. She assumed some of them were still how you left them before you died, but others looked like Robin had been going through your things. 
Nancy asked her how she was and although that felt like a stupid question, she wanted her friend to know she cared. Robin appreciated it nonetheless and they talked for a while, but it wasn’t the same, not without you.
You were so full of light and you brought that light everywhere you went when you were alive. Every room in that apartment felt empty without you, it wasn’t home anymore. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, the two of you were supposed to have forever. There were so many things that you never got to do, that you never will do. She can’t bring you back and if she can’t find a way to live with that, she would miss out on so much of her life too.
Before you died, you told Robin she had to live. You told her you wanted her to just live, live the life you couldn’t and live a fulfilling life for the both of you. That was something you wish you hadn’t said, that was a burden you wish you didn’t place upon her. If she couldn’t move on, you would understand, you wouldn’t blame her and you would not be disappointed in her. You were dead though, you couldn’t take those words back.
Robin remembered that, but she also remembered that you loved her. She knew that you wanted the best for her, that you just wanted her to be okay. She thought the world of you and that would never change.
Nancy noticed Robin’s eyes start to fill with tears and followed her line of sight to your sweater. She wanted to distract Robin, but knew no matter how hard she tried, the conversation would somehow make its way back to you, it always did. 
Nancy decided to talk about you, the good memories and all the laughs you guys shared. They talked about the times you smiled so bright, it could light up the entirety of Hawkins after dark. About how they both missed you and how they wished you were still here. They remembered all the memories they got to experience with you and were grateful for the time they did get. It made them both feel better, talking about you and remembering you happily.
“Have you talked to Steve at all recently?” Nancy asked after a while. She knew Robin hadn’t and she knew Steve hadn’t talked to anyone either. She thought it would be good for them to talk to each other, they both lost the most important person in their life and were isolating themselves. 
Robin shook her head and mumbled something incoherent, which to Nancy was very clearly a “no I haven’t.” 
After about thirty minutes of convincing, Robin decided she would go check in on Steve. She could only guess he wasn’t doing great. You were his sister and if she was in pieces, she couldn’t imagine how his heart felt right now.
About twenty minutes later, Robin found herself standing in front of Steve’s door. A part of her felt bad for bothering him, especially after so long, but she concluded that both him and herself had isolated for far too long. They avoided you and any reminders of your existence, but they couldn’t live in denial anymore.
Robin knocked on the door and shortly after, a very dishevelled Steve appeared at the door. He was glad to see her, really, but he missed you more than he could handle. He half smiled and gestured for Robin to come inside.
They talked for a couple of hours, about what they’ve been doing since the funeral, how they’ve been coping and how much they missed you. Robin apologized for not reaching out sooner, Steve understood and apologized as well. They talked about how they missed each other and for the first time since you died, something felt normal. Something felt like the way it used to be, something familiar. 
Steve asked if Robin had been to visit you and she told him that she couldn’t, she had been avoiding it since the funeral. He admitted that he wasn’t able to go either and suggested they go together.
Robin would have been shocked, but if her heart felt empty, broken and just overall shattered, she could only imagine what it felt like for him. He had known you his whole life after all. She agreed that they go see you together and they did.
Steve walked cautiously towards the headstone, hands in his pocket and his voice was low as he spoke, “So I guess this is her home now, huh?”
Robin just nodded, too in shock, staring at your name engraved in the granite. She bent down and placed her hand upon the top of it as she let a couple tears slip from her eyes. 
“There’s just so much we didn’t get to do and now those chances are gone… forever,” her voice cracked and she started to sob. She brought her hand up to her face to quiet herself as Steve came over and hugged her.
“I would have married her, I should have asked her. Why didn’t I ask her?” Robin sobbed into Steve’s shoulder. He held her tight and tried to calm her, but even he was crying now. He would never get to see his sister get married and she would never see him do the same. There were so many things he would miss about you.
After a few minutes, they stood up as Robin took a deep breath and wiped her tears. She gave Steve a small smile to which he returned as he wiped his own tears. 
They gave each other space to talk to you alone and each of them promised you they would take care of the other. They knew they would miss you for as long as they would live, but they weren’t alone if they had each other.
Steve loved you and he would always miss his sister, but he knew you were in a better place now, that you would always look after him from wherever you are. You were his world, he won’t ever be the same again, but he could promise to do his best every day, for you. Everything he did now, would be for you, in memory of you. 
Robin decided that the joy of loving you was worth the pain of losing you, at least she got to experience what she did with you. She wouldn’t trade her time with you for the world because in the end, no love - no matter how brief - is ever wasted.
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alvaro-s · 1 year
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When insecurities come
If there's one thing couples fear is falling into a rut or having insecurities about the relationship, and while it's often not all bad, it can get a little exhausting when you don't have anyone with you.
This is what Mirabel was facing after hearing how one of the women in town talked about how her husband complained that he was tired of eating carrots every other day and she even mentioned how she was also starting to get tired of him taking her shopping every weekend to the market and after that taking her to the restaurant a few meters from their house. and how she thought that maybe the best thing to do was to divorce him after all they had been together for 10 years and even though they didn't have children yet she preferred not to with the arguments that were escalating and even mentioned how sometimes it seemed like she didn't know him at all.
Mirabel was never a person who was interested in gossip, but she had to admit that hearing this had worried her, not because of the possible breakup of that woman, but because of her own relationship with her current girlfriend and older sister Isabela, Mirabel knew that she could not compare the ten years with the six months they had been dating, but she could not help thinking that no matter how long they had been dating the fact is that they had been together all their lives and because of that they knew each other very well.
Mirabel knew much of Isabela's life as well as Isabela knew of hers, which produced another conflict in Mirabel's mind and that was the lack of surprises, not that Mirabel couldn't use her knowledge to surprise Isabela with some gift or some food she likes, but she was aware that there wasn't much she didn't know about Isabela, they had been estranged for some time but even then Mirabel always watched her, she could never take her eyes off the person who meant the world to her.
Mirabel left for Casita with her mind in a haze of thoughts and found Luisa carrying some barrels.
-Hello sister- Mirabel gave a crooked smile.
-Hello Luisa- Luisa noticed that something was not right so she did what she does best and leaving the barrels aside she carried Mirabel on her shoulder.
-All right sis, I'm all ears, tell me what's going on," Mirabel smiled.
-It's kind of silly..." Mirabel sighed.
-I don't think it's silly if you care about it," Mirabel smiled.
-Luisa, do you think my relationship with Isa can survive? - Luisa raised an eyebrow.
- What are you talking about? - Mirabel sighed.
-It's just that... our relationship is not something... common" Luisa put Mirabel down and sat on one of the barrels.
-Tell me what's going on Mira- Mirabel took a deep breath.
-Well, I heard a woman talking about how her husband's complaints about the food bothered her and then she started to complain about how she was tired of her weekend walk routine and that they had been walking for ten years..." Mirabel started to walk without noticing how Luisa only nodded and next to her came Dolores and Mariano who were staring at her.
- Should we say something? - Mariano looked doubtfully.
-Let her unburden herself and just listen," Dolores next to him smiled.
And I'm not saying that knowing each other all our lives is bad, but what if Isabela gets bored because I can't surprise her, I mean it's not that I lack creativity and we always have fun on our dates but what will happen in ten years?, will I still be the person Isabela wants by her side?, not to mention our age difference which is something big and- Without noticing it the three observers were joined by Camilo and Antonio who brought Arepas and Casita put chairs for them to watch how Mirabel kept pacing back and forth without looking at anyone.
- How long has she been like this? - Camilo whispered.
-A few minutes- Luisa whispered.
-No one said that taking your relationship from sisters to girlfriends would be easy, of course there would be difficult times, I mean not only can't I say that Isabela and I are dating, which makes every time she gets close to a guy she burns with jealousy which I know is mutual because she also gets upset when someone tries to get close to me which is so cute, but that's not the point, but how am I supposed to avoid a future crisis in my relationship without looking like a total paranoid, I know I love Isabela and that's the only thing I am certain of, so tell me Luisa.... am I overreacting? - Mirabel turned to see that she had an audience besides Luisa and they all looked at her with different expressions and Mirabel wanted the earth to swallow her up right there.
-I don't think you should worry so much, Mira- Dolores was the first to speak.
-Yes, look I don't understand the whole love conflict or half of what you said, but I don't think someone would be able to get bored being by your side cousin- Camilo smiled while he ate his arepa.
-Mirabel since Isabela and I separated both me and her are happier and I know it because every time they talk about you her eyes shine and she acts a little awkward, something that never happened when she was with me, whenever she smiled it was strange and her body seemed to be always tense, with you... well she could be herself- Mirabel smiled.
-I like it when they are with me and together, it's more fun, Isabela plays more with me now-  Antonio gave a big smile.
-Sis, I'm not saying that your insecurities are bad, I mean even we were slaves of routine, I know what it can cause, but I don't think that will be a problem for you and even if you were to fall into one I don't think you would separate because of it, you would make it bearable in your own way- Dolores nodded in agreement with Luisa's affirmation.
-Exactly, Mirabel, every couple is a world and no relationship is the same as any other and you can always count on us to give Isabela a reprimand if she starts being a jerk- Mirabel smiled.
-Thank you, you are the best family I could have- Mirabel joins her cousins and sister in a group hug.
-We love you Mira, and so does Isabela, we care about you and that's why it's worth swallowing the romantic dramas- Mirabel pouted.
-Dolores- Camilo laughed.
-It looks like we managed to avoid the crisis.
- Crisis? What are you talking about? - An extra voice joined in, causing everyone to separate and look at the newcomer.
- Isa...- Mirabel smiled as soon as she saw her.
-And we lost her- Camilo laughed at his cousin's face, but Dolores elbowed him.
- Can you explain to me what's going on?- Isabela approached the group confused.
-Well it is better if Mirabel explains to you after all it is because of her that we are here so she is all yours- Luisa "Gently" pushed Mirabel who fell into Isabela's arms making them both blush.
-Well we'll see you later- They all left leaving the couple alone.
-So... What happened?- Mirabel sighed and decided to tell him.
(20 min later)
-And that's what happened- Isabela sat on a chair that Casita had brought for her.
-I understand, the truth is that I was also worried at some point, I talked about it with Mom, with Aunt Pepa, with Grandma, I even talked about it with Uncle Bruno... I was a little desperate, and do you know what they told me? - Mirabel denied.
-They said it in their words clearly, but, they told me that relationships take time and effort, it won't always be pretty but the relationship is two people, it's not just me and it's not just you, we are two and of course we will always have doubts and even more we who are sisters, but that is a factor that should make our relationship stronger and honestly I doubt that I will get bored, since you were born I have had a whole odyssey of life Mira- Mirabel smiled.
-Well, we still have a long way to go... and I would be happy to do it by your side- Mirabel extended her hand.
-It would be a pleasure to accompany you- Isabela took her hand and with her free hand she lifted Mirabel's chin to kiss her on the lips.
Neither of them noticed that from the second floor windows they were being watched by their cousins and sister.
-They really are just as much trouble- Camilo smiled.
-Yes they are, but I don't mind at all- Dolores smiled.
-I'm glad they are happy- Mariano smiled sincerely.
-Well, it will be our duty to take care of their happiness in the future, since none of them will have it easy- Luisa smiled.
-I think they can do it- They all looked at Toñito on Luisa's shoulder.
-What are you talking about?-
-They are the strongest people I know and if they were able to admit their feelings in spite of what it implied then they will be fine, they are not so weak as to break- Dolores sighed.
-I'll tell uncle Bruno to be careful with the telenovelas, he's influencing you too much and you're only 5 years old- Toñito pouted.
-Aaw but I like them and I'm about to find out why Carmen chose Miguel Alberto instead of Juan Pablo-
-You are 15 years away from falling in love, young man- Camilo and Mariano laughed.
While they were having fun none of them noticed that Isabela and Mirabel had left the scene and if they did notice it none of them cared since the couple crisis had already been avoided, there would be more in the future they all knew it but they would always support them since they were their family and if being together made them happy they would put up with any tantrum or any scene, after all nobody said that loving your family would be easy but it was worth it.
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mnxxxie · 10 months
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Bnha characters favorite portals songs <3
Includes: bakugou, kaminari, todoroki, Kirishima, midoriya, Mina, and tamaki
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♡Bakugou♡
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‘DEATH’ (JK LMAOO💀)
‘PLUTO’
Literally change my mind.
He likes the beat and thinks the lyrics are badass asf.. ofc he won’t admit it.
I mean this song is basically abt Melanie (in this case Katsuki) growing as a person.
His favorite lyrics:
“Pluto destroy me, kill me off slowly. I’ll bathe in my ashes, rise like a phoenix, show me who I am becoming”
“I’m turning to expired routes, help me move on. There’s nothing in this tired town, for me no more. What once was a home is a hell I can’t manage, so send me packin it up.”
The entire beat drop with the last section.
♡ Kaminari♡
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‘MOON CYCLE’
The entire reason he loves this song is because of the “yeuAh” at the beginning. He thinks it funny.
Let’s be honest here, he probably has no idea that the song is about periods because.. y’know.. he’s a little bit stupid.
Once he finds out that the song is actually a distrack of Oliver tree, he likes it even more.
He stay an Oliver Tree hater.💀
His favorite lyrics:
“Why you always act so serious? I said ‘baby boy you know I’m on my period’ YUH”
“It’s so scary, how my aura got him howling at my moon cycle baby”
“Now he kissing on the ground that I walk on. Tryna get another taste, but I’m all cramped up. Pain like a blade on the front lawn, but I don’t give a fuck ‘cause I’m so strong.”
“I could win a fight on my period. Matter of fact, right now I could built a pyramid. You’re messing with my cycle that is dangerous”
♡ Todoroki♡
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‘BATTLE OF THE LARYNX’
He likes Melanie’s clever use of the word “Larynx”. Since a Larynx is basically the human voice box, allowing you to speak, or in Melanie’s case, argue, it goes along well with the theme of her album because a Larynx (for people who don’t know the meaning) sounds like some sort of mythical creature.
Reminds him with his relationship with his father a little bit.
Likes the instrumentals.
He also thinks the transition between LEECHES to BATTLE OF THE LARYNX was pretty cool and very smooth.
His favorite lyrics:
“You used all your words for a quick game, blew it all before you won”
“Poke me to battle, I’ll jump on the saddle, I’ll smile as you fall to your feet”
“And they talk without thinkin’, they bark while they’re shaking, with teeth that are round and dull. And they yell while they’re chasing, while I’m steady pacing. My syllables hit the floor.”
“I’ll reck you, if you chase me. But I’ll be silent until you cross the line. . . Don’t you battle with my larynx tonight”
♡ Kirishima♡
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‘THE CONTORTIONIST’
Idk this song kinda reminds him of his quirk in a way? He can’t really explain how.
The bone crunching is satisfying to him …
She thinks Melanie is very manly overall.
Admires Melanie Martinez for her unique style and her ability to simply not give a fuck.
His favorite lyrics:
The snap in the beginning
“I don’t wanna bruise for you, holding back my words until my face is blue *GASP*”
“I’m done. I’m done. Done doing back bends, I break and I snap, it’s no fun. No fun. Push myself into a box while you held out a gun. IM DONE”
“OouAHA HA HA ha heh HAH..!”
“Got me like a bad tattoo (oh-oh-oh) always under skin even when it gets removed (ooh) never got a chance to undo (oh-oh-oh) positions that you forced my way into.”
The bones crunching in unison at the end slaps
♡ Midorya♡
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‘VOID’
He kind of relates to this song.
He secretly feels as if he actually isn’t up to being the #1 hero and tears himself down for it.
The lyrics remind him of the way he was treated for not having a quirk back in middle school.
‘VOID’ reminds him that he isn’t the only one who feels the way he does and it motivates him to work harder.
He listens to this song while training.
His favorite lyrics:
“It’s tasting kind of lonely, and my mind wants to control me.”
“Eh-eh-eh-empty. There’s rotten things left in me. Injected by society. No one here but me to judge me.”
“Pipe down with the noise I cannot bear my sorrow. I hate who I was before. I fear I won’t live to see the day tomorrow, someone tell me if this is hell.”
“My eyes are staring at me, and they seem so damn unhappy.”
“Ca-ca-ca-collect. My fickle insecurities. And turn hem into beauty. alchemize the dark within me-e”
♡ Mina♡
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‘MILK OF THE SIREN’
She was a little skeptical at first ‘cause it kinda sounded like a title for an X video.. (iykwim..)
After the first beat drop though she was hooked.
LET THEM DROWNNNN!!
Female empowerment all the way. This song hypes her up so much.
Also she love love LOVES songs with the creepy vibe, it’s safe to say Melanie Martinez was her favorite artist after this.
Her favorite lyrics:
“Drink from the leche of the sirens, summon the sailors in town. Strangle their fear of deciding. Which ones deserving to drown”
Every beat drop that goes “DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH “DROWNNNN”
“All of our sisters were killed and abused, by sword swinging men who would always accuse”
“The worst of a woman, who fights for our right, to be where we belong at the front of the line. Tired of silence and being polite, your legs turn to shimmering scales in the night.”
“LET THEM DROWNNN .. (DROWNNN) LET THEM DROWN! (DROWN) LET THEM DROWNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!”
The end sequence that goes “nothing wrong with a little havoc. It’s fun when shit hits the fan. So guillotine their heads by shouting, cut them off, leave waters red.”
And ofc the signature “don’t feel bad when these fuckers all drown”
♡ Tamaki ♡
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‘LIGHT SHOWER’
He thinks the song is sweet and lowkey reminds him of Mirio.. *cough* totally not shipping..
(If this is a universe where y/n is in it, and they’re his s/o, then he’d 100% want to slow dance to this song with them..<3)
The shower/water sound effects are soothing to him and it puts him in a better, more positive mood.
His favorite lyrics:
“You are the light I’ve been searching for for ever, feels like man I’ve really never felt the rain.”
“But you, make me want to plan out my last days on earth eating you. Ohh the tips of your teeth fit perfect in me. you’re the shower of light I’d devour any day of the week. Baby cleanse me.”
“I was surprised to see heaven in your eyes. I never once was treated right. You’re what I’m missing in my life. As bright as the sun, give you your vitamin D. Let’s run, into another dimension. You make me feel like I’m on drugs.”
I might make a pt.2? 👀 (not proofread……)
I’m obsessed with this album… can you tell?
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can-you-hear-me-yet · 11 months
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I wish I felt real.
I know I am. In fact, I am overwhelmed with the constant fact that I exist. In an uncontrollable and unrelenting world, where there are billions of perceptions of life, I understand that I exist and that my presence has the ability to change the course of several lives. Yet, I can’t get this idea out of my head that if I left right now and walked until I physically dropped, nothing would be different. I’d be farther away and a lot more tired, but after I walked back it would be like nothing happened at all.
That doesn’t add up. It should make a difference. Of course, I am actually sitting in bed writing this. If I started to walk nothing could happen but I could also be hit by a car, abducted by a stranger, make a wrong turn get lost and never find my way back. There are endless possibilities of what could happen and where. I could die in my sleep without every knowing what was coming.
So why is it so important to feel real if I know that I am? Why so I seek long term happiness if I can cloud myself in constant reoccurring bursts of dopamine? Is the pause in between too much to handle or am I afraid that if I were to truly experience happiness I’d realize I’ve never felt it before?
I told my girlfriend I wanted to go on a drive but that I would get upset because my brain would question whether or not we could afford to use that gas. She agreed and went to sleep thinking I was going with her. I am awake now, wishing she would have talked me into going on that drive. Yet I am unable to be upset or even disappointed because I provided both the suggestion and the rejection.
Typically I rant about these things on Snapchat but I have a fear of being heard at the moment because I know that I believe everything I say. Not to sound stuck up but I am usually right. Not about everyday little things but I get these gut feelings that I’ve learned to trust and they tell me I don’t have friends. That those who are listening are not hearing me and it hurts. Every ignored cry leaves a scar within me that itches every time I yearn to cry out.
I can’t make noise when I cry. I have been practicing alone in the bath but sound won’t leave my throat. It burns to stay quiet, cremating my screams and scattering the ashes over my childhood. I want to be heard. When I’m laughing and when I’m crying.
I want my best friend to talk to me again. I want my mom to acknowledge she hurt me. I want my grandpa to forgive himself and my grandma to give herself room to be whoever she wants to be. I want my aunt to treat herself like a human being and not a medical file. I want my sister to be safe. I want my girlfriend to be happy. I want to feel alive.
I want someone to tell me they know that I am not ok. I want someone to hit me with a reality check in some fleeting hope that my head will reattach to my shoulders and tel me what to do. I need to be me again.
I can’t even remember what I typed… I think I need to see a therapist. Work some of this out. Just in case I actually go through with that thought, my goal is to feel real. To feel alive. I don’t want to think about why I replied “No worries” to the cashier but “Of course” to the lady I opened the door for. It’s a useless thought that overtook a memory of whatever I was doing in the moment. I remember how hard I was breathing when I kissed my girlfriend for the first time, but I can’t remember kissing her. My childhood memories consist of the photos I’ve seen in passing. I used to walk through 5 towns everyday after school because it was better than being at home. I would stay up all night after school, sneak out at 3am walk around until 6am sneak back in then go to school. I would drain my body of any energy all in effort to feel alive and it worked. I really wish it didn’t because it’s all I can think about now and I am pleading to my future self that I show this to my therapist.
I know this is a mess.
This is my cry for help. This is as loud as I can be.
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nataliedanovelist · 2 years
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GF AU - Mystery Husbands Part Like the Sea
Hey guys! A gift for my very good friend, @jackyjackdraws ! I hope you like it!
After all is said and done, Stan accepts Ford’s offer to sail the Arctic Ocean. Initially, Stan’s husband is ecstatic, but as the fact that they will be apart seeps in, emotional chaos ensues.
~~~~~~~~~~
Kevin made some excuse about a shower so the twins could talk alone, and in the time it took for the old Irishman to undress, shower, and redress in pajamas, the brothers were talking in the hall. Some of his husband’s cons and sneakiness must have rubbed off on him, because he couldn’t help himself and he leaned against the bedroom door.
“… my house back, you give me my name back, and this whole Mystery Shack nonsense is over forever, you got it?”
There was a pause, and Kevin used the silence to ask himself if he really just heard that.
“Are you kidding me?” Stan asked darkly.
“No, I’m not. I don’t think I’m being unreasonable, Stanley.”
“So asking an entire family to leave their home, asking my husband to leave the home we’ve shared for thirty years, to tell our kids they can’t come back to the home we raised them in, is reasonable?” Stan asked, taking a step forward, making Ford dip back a bit.
“Well, it’s not my fault you dragged your family into this.” Ford gritted his teeth with a red face.
“What else was I supposed to do?! Abandon my family to try to bring you back?! Leave you out there to die, or worse?!” Stan growled in his throat and waved a hand, batting the topic away. “Whatever, the point is, we’ve both paid the mortgage, raised our kids here, and have built a life for ourselves, more than you can say you did in the six years you were here! No one even cared you were gone!” Stan harshly reminded his brother, and while he regretted the addiction comment a little, for once he was glad he told the truth.
“So, no! We’re not leaving! I’m not having my husband go homeless cuz my own brother doesn’t care about his family!”
And Ford turned his back as Stan marched away, heading for bed.
Kevin quickly laid in bed, his back to the door, so his husband could have a moment to collect himself.
In the darkness, Stan took a heavy breath, threw his suit off, and climbed into bed. His back was to Kevin, but the bearded man knew someone needed snuggles, so without a word he turned Stan into a little spoon, and they both fell into a less-than-peaceful sleep.
~~~~~~~~~
After watching his own husband forget who Kevin was - hell, forget Stan Pines himself - then slowly regain it over a few days, volunteering to help rebuild the town, making repairs at home, and attending a big birthday party, Kevin was emotionally drained and exhausted beyond belief. Maybe a quick smoke would give him enough strength to finish the party, and then collapse into bed with Stan.
So when Kevin was around the house, puffing a cigar, he heard footsteps and voices, and quickly put his cigar out in case it was one of the kids.
“I didn’t want to say anything with everyone listening, but we’ve got a problem.” Ford stated. Kevin was a little tired of eavesdropping on their private conversations, so he shook his head and walked around the other side of the house to rejoin the party, trusting the love of his life would share this interaction with him if it was important.
“Weirdmageddon has been contained,” Ford explained. “But I’m detecting some strange, new anomalies near the Arctic Ocean. I want to go investigate it, but Ithink I might be too old to go it alone.” He hinted at, with a small, hopeful smile.
“Are you sayin’ you need someone to help you sail around the world on the adventure of a lifetime?” Stan asked, just as hopeful, but life had taught him that if something was too good to be true, it definitely was. Then again…
“I don’t just want someone to come with me, Stanley,” Ford corrected gently, pulling an old picture out of his trenchcoat. “I want it to be you. Will you give me a second chance?”
Stan accepted the picture, grinning, and asked to lighten the mood, “You think we’ll finally find some treasure?”
Ford chuckled and punched his shoulder. “I’d say there’s a high probability.”
Stan returned the quiet laughter and said, “Yeah, I’ll do it. I’ll go sailing with you. Just lemme talk to Kevin about it and settle a few things.”
“Of course!” Ford said. “It’s not like we’re leaving tomorrow. Take as much time as you need making arrangements.”
Stan nodded, handed him the photo, and turned to rejoin the party, but his brother placed a six-fingered hand on his shoulder. “And Stan…”
The conman looked over his shoulder, and he was surprised to find his brother the happiest he looked in… well, his memory wasn’t the greatest, but he swore he never saw Ford look so happy.
“Thank you.”
Stan smiled and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, well… you’re welcome.”
As Stan was walking back to the crowd of the party, he saw Kevin chit chatting with McGucket, but the old hillbilly was distracted when Mabel ran up to him, thanking him for her birthday present, and so Stan stole the opportunity to strut up to the man he loved like a proud peacock.
Right as Kevin saw him and waved, Stan grabbed his raised hand, dipped him as much as their old backs would let them (which wasn’t much), and kissed him.
Most of the folks at the party were too distracted by their own small worlds to notice, but Pacifica made a face before correcting herself, smiling and shrugging, and Mabel awed with shining eyes.
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!” Kevin laughed as Stan stood them up straight. “Who gave you a hundred pounds in gold?”
“C’mere!” Stan, like a excited child, pulled Kevin by the hand over to the snack table, where it was a tad more private, and said with a huge radiant smile, “Ford’s asked me to go sailing with him!”
Kevin stared, but then smiled back and held his husband by the forearms. “Really?”
“Yeah! He asked me to go sailing to the Arctic Ocean with him, to check out some anomaly sightings, and I said I’d go.”
“Dead on! It’s what you’ve wanted since you were a kid, right? I’m gonna take a shot in the dark and guess since he’s asked you to sail with him and you said yes that you two have made up?” He clarified, raising an eyebrow.
Stan beamed, grateful that his life-partner was taking the news so well, and shrugged. “Well, yeah. I guess there’s some things you can’t come out of and not make amends, and defeating an all-knowing, one-eyed triangle is one of them.”
“Well, I’m happy for you.” Kevin said, moving his hand down to his palm and squeezing his hand. “Soos and I can hold the fort while you’re away.”
“That’s another thing… I think Soos is due for a promotion.”
“I agree.”
~~~~~~~~~~
And so the old twins scheduled to leave for the sea two weeks after the young twins left Gravity Falls. After a family meeting with Soos to tell him that Kevin would be training him to take over the Mystery Shack someday and that Stan was leaving for the Arctic Ocean and wouldn’t be back until the next summer, reality of the sudden change was seeping in.
Packed boxes, covering more tours so Stan could plan with Ford, short dinners or some split in half, bringing the brothers their food in the basement as they poured over maps and satellite readings, it was slowly dawning on Kevin that his husband was leaving.
He had been honest at the birthday party! He was happy that Stan and Ford had made up, and were finally fulfilling their lifelong dream! But bitter thoughts were crawling into his skull the longer he was alone with his thoughts.
How long have you two been together? What all have you been through together? And he’d still rather leave with him than stay here with you? Bullshit.
He hasn’t seen his brother in thirty years! If Stan wants to go sailing around the world with him, he should.
But how long will he be gone? Will he even come back?
He’ll come back. He always comes back.
Kevin smiled at the sleeping form of his husband, watching him sleep in the dim light of the moon.
Okay, but still. Stan’s really gonna go with that… that asshole?! Stan put you and your family through hell to get Ford back, and what did he do? Punch him in the fucking mouth!
They’ve made up! If Stan can forgive him, so can I.
It isn’t fair! You’ve given everything up for this man! And he’s leaving you! He’s abandoning you!
That’s not true! Just because we’re married doesn’t mean he has to be glued to my hip! I’ll support him in anything he decides to do.
Bullshit! We’ve supported him for THIRTY! FUCKING! YEARS! He owes you this! Don’t let him go!
Kevin sat up and rubbed his forehead. This was bullshit. He was never going to get any sleep like this. He decided to silently creep to the kitchen for water.
He mentally scolded himself, as if he was scolding a child who was throwing a tantrum. We don’t say things like that, we don’t think things like that. He knew Stan loved him very much, and if the tables were turned, Stan would be happy for him and want him to go, be supportive every step of the way, so that is what he is going to do.
Now the inner voice was pitiful and sad. As Kevin reached for a glass, he thought to himself, But I’ll miss him. And he could shake that sinking, lonely, dreadful feeling away.
He went to the sink, but a shiny bottle on top of the fridge caught his eye. Maybe a little drink to make him sleepy.
Kevin poured himself a small splash and swallowed. The taste was bitter, like his thoughts. So for good measure he took another mouthful and sat at the table to wait for the drowsiness to settle in.
I don’t want him to go. I love him. I’ll miss him.
Too bad.
Kevin scrubbed at his stinging eyes. This was stupid. He was stupid. He just had to hold it in until Stan was gone.
“Wanna share some of that?”
Speak of the devil. Stan stood at the doorway, shirtless and in his boxers, smiling with a bit of confusion and concern on the edges of his face.
Kevin smiled and jerked his head to a chair. “It ain’t black stuff, but help yourself.”
Stan sat and stole Kevin’s glass, pouring himself a swallow and asking, “What made you open the bar so late?”
“Couldn’t sleep. Just wasn’t tired.”
Stan took his shot, then offered smugly, “We don’t have to sleep in bed, y’know.”
Kevin looked away with a roll of his eyes.
Stan grabbed his hand, kissed it, then started kissing down his arm, scooting his chair closer as he worked to his shoulder, hoping to kiss his neck. “Mm, you did always look…”
“Stanley,” Kevin warned, freeing his hand from his grip, and Stan sat up straight. The Irishman cleared his throat, and attempted to sound calm and normal. “M’sorry, m’just not in the mood, lad.”
“That’s okay.” Stan assured, a hand on his shoulder. “We could watch a movie, or go back to bed and cuddle, or… if you wanna talk…”
“What’s there to talk about?” He asked calmly. A little too calmly.
Stan raised an eyebrow, his eyes unable to meet Kevin’s, as he was refusing to look at him. “Well, it’s not like I’m an expert at reading people or anything, or have been with you nearly all our lives, but I think you’re mad at me. So I’d like the chance to fix it if you’d let me.”
The Irishman finally turned and looked at Stan, and he was a bit taken back to see such fire in his eyes, a furious scowl over his beard. “Oh please, what would I be mad at you for?” Kevin asked sarcastically. “That you saved the world? That I nearly lost you? Nah, stay on your rocker, lad.”
Kevin stood up, grabbed the bottle, and put it back on top of the fridge.
Stan sighed. He figured this would happen. “Look, babe, I’m sorry you had to see me like that…”
“It’s fine. I’m not mad.”
“Are you really trying to lie to me?” Stan asked, amused and trying to lighten the mood.
“I’m not mad about that!” Kevin shouted, turning to face him again, feeling a little better that he was standing and his husband was sitting, making it easier to scold him. “I understand why you did what you did! And it all worked out! You’re back! It’s fine! I’m not mad about that!”
“But you’re mad about something.” Stan reminded the room.
“WHY?!” Kevin yelled. “Why did you have to agree to go sailing with him, why, Stanley?!”
Stan was surprised for a moment, but then ashamed for his miscalculation. “Oh.”
“Why, Stanley?! I mean, really?! The Arctic Ocean?! Lord knows you’ll freeze or get eaten by a whale or get lost at sea or fall in love with a siren or some other bullshit! And you didn’t even ask me! You just told me you were going!”
“I thought you said it was stupid for couples to ask for permission to do stuff?”
“It is! But I still want you to ask me permission for important things, like, huh I dunno, LEAVING HOME FOR MONTHS!”
“Sweetheart, I’ll be back by June, and Ford’s been working hard on making sure we can text and call you and the kids whenever we want.”
“That’s another thing!” Kevin went on with his rant. “Just, what, after all that, he thinks he can make it better with a boat and a never-ending guys’ trip?!”
Stan stood up. “Babe, I fucked up, too.” He reminded him firmly. “And this isn’t some…”
“But goddamnit, Stanley Pines!” Kevin yelled, tears pricking his eyes. And he mumbled through his gray beard. “I’m gonna miss you like hell.”
Every so often, in the quiet moments, in between making plans and cracking jokes with his brother, right before bed, Stan had thought about how much he was going to miss his beloved husband, but the excitement of his childhood dream coming true easily distracted him. He had to realize that, unfortunately, Kevin didn’t have such an accessible distraction from his pain.
“Aw, Kev…” Stan stood and Kevin allowed him to bring him into a hug. Kevin only allowed a tear or two to dot Stan’s hairy shoulder, but damn it, if he wasn’t going to cling to Stan like he was a life-preserver out at sea.
“I get why you have to go.” Kevin muttered. “I really get it. And I want you to go. But… fuck. I love you, Stan. And I’m gonna miss you so bad…”
“I’ll miss you, too, babe.” Stan kissed the top of his head and mumbled against his skin. “You’re my family, my entire world. I love you. You know that. And I know you know I have to go. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry I put you in this situation. I’m sorry I scared you.”
“Maybe my life would’ve been… simpler without, that’s true.” Kevin admitted with a tiny smile.
“But I’ll never say sorry for being in your life.” Stan said, also smiling, almost cocky-like. “I have to be with you.”
“Good. I don’t want your apology.”
“Good.” Stan loosened his grip to look at him. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” And Kevin kissed him, a hand on the back of Stan’s hand, fingers in his gray hair.
And they stood like that. For only five minutes, or half an hour, or eternity. Who’s to say? The old couple just held each other and reminisced the blessing in even having someone to love like this. But eventually their old legs were becoming sores, their energies were running low, and they surrendered themselves to cuddles in their small bed.
~~~~~~~~~~
After a four hour drive from their hometown, stopping at Eugene for lunch, Soos, Stan, Ford, and Kevin arrived at Coos Bay, where a lovely, brand new Stan O War II stood proudly on the water, waiting to be taken away. Unloading Soos’ truck of scientific tools and supplies, and the Stanmobile of luggage and personal belongings, it took about an hour of all four men working to pack up the ship and have everything settled in nicely.
It was nice to see the boat in all it’s glory. Kevin saw the comfortable couch nailed to the floor, fully-stocked kitchen, cozy bunk beds, working shower, and anything else the twins would need while out at sea. It was also easier when he saw Stan running around as joyful as a child. Easier, but still hard to let him go.
At long last, they had to say goodbye.
Ford held out a hand to Kevin while Soos tearfully hugged Stan so tightly his feet left the ground. “Well, it was nice to meet you, Kevin. Thanks for the chess games. And of course for keeping an eye on my brother.” He added, hoping things were wel between them.
Kevin smiled and shook his hand. “Yeah, o’course, lad. Just make sure ya take good care of him.” He joked, but there was a hint of a plea behind his beard.
“I will.” Ford said seriously, with a kind smile. “I promise.”
Kevin made a manly pat on his shoulder, and Ford turned to climb onto the ship, and give Stan a minute to say goodbye to his loved ones.
“Alright, alright! Lemme go! Kev! Got a crowbar?” Stan called.
Soos put him down and grabbed his cap. “S-Sorry, Mr. Mystery.”
Stan smiled, took off his fez, and placed it on Soos’ head. “You’re Mr. Mystery. You just make sure Kevin doesn’t burn down the place.”
“Oy!”
Soos, blushing, saluted his boss. “You got it, Mr. Pines!”
Stan and Kevin looked at each other, then hugged each other tightly.
“I’ll call you every Friday. And text you every day.”
“Yeah, I know you will.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Kevin ruffled his exposed hair. “I’m really proud of you.”
Stan blushed. “You’re a good man. I won’t be mad if you go up with a hot babe or two while I’m away.”
Kevin laughed and made a face. “Nah, you’re the only pain for me.”
Stan snorted, stole a kiss, but Kevin dragged him into another long hug.
“I’ll miss you.”
“I’ll miss you, too.”
They let the moment last as long as possible, but all good things must come to an end. So new good things can begin.
Kevin let Stan go, and he climbed up onto the boat and released the rope, just as Ford started the engine, and the boat started to glide away from the dock as Kevin and Soos waved it away.
“Oh, Stan,” Ford said, almost in a scolding manner, and pulled out a red beanie from his coat and placed it on Stan’s head. “You’ve got to keep your ears warm.”
“Alright, Ma, but I don’t see your hat!”
“Well if you don’t want the beanie I picked up for you…”
“I didn’t say that, keep your hands off me!”
The twins playfully bickered as they slowly became tiny dots out at sea. Kevin laughed, already missing his husband’s banter, quirks, laugh, smile, whatever have you, but somehow, magically, seeing him so happy on that boat, seeing him well taken care of and safe, it was easier to let him go.
Still hard, but easier.
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pastelwitchling · 2 years
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The Wolf King chapter 5 teaser.
***
               Jack had no idea how tired he really was until he woke a moment later to knocking on his door. He groaned under his breath, turning his face into the carpet. Instead of bathing and changing, he’d simply pulled his coat and scarf on, tucked his blanket back in with his other things, and fallen asleep with his satchel in his arms, curled up on the floor before the fire.
               He pushed himself up slowly as the person knocking said, “Mr. Hunter, may I come in?”
               Jack squinted groggily at the door half a second longer before Mira’s words from earlier came back to him.
               “Are you a werewolf, too?”
               “Of course. We all are.”
               “Mr. Hunter?”
               The voice was a man’s. Steady, but not threatening. Jack swallowed and stood as the man asked again if he could come in.
               “Come in,” he managed without breaking his words.
               The doors opened and a tall, lanky man walked in. He had pitch black hair that was curled back perfectly, wore a violet vest over a white button-down shirt, his nails were painted black, and a single, silver fang earring hung from a pointy ear.
               He looked around until his amethyst eyes settled on Jack, then he blinked once, slowly. “You look awful,” he said in a British accent, and strode up to Jack. They were the same height, but maybe it was the way this guy held himself that made him feel taller.
               The man plucked Jack’s coat and scarf. “So glad I spent an hour scrubbing at these. Really, sir, blood is hard enough to get out the first time!” He rolled his eyes, turning away. “Well, we’re not taking you to breakfast with the king looking like that, are we? Hurry along now, sir, I’ll run the bath and you can –”
               “I’m not taking a bath,” Jack said, if only to get him to slow down. “And I’m not wearing any of his clothes either.”
               “Nonsense, sir,” the man said indignantly. “I can’t possibly let you go downstairs with –”
               “And don’t call me ‘sir,’” he said, then in an afterthought, “please.”
               “Then what should I call you?” he demanded.
               “Jack. Jack Hunter. That’s my name. What’s yours?”
               The man blinked, caught off guard. Had he not expected Jack to ask for his name?
               “Er . . .” his shoulders fell. “Everett Mallow.” He raised his chin. “I’m the one that told His Majesty you’d probably want your own room. He wasn’t really happy about it, but I managed to convince him.”
               “Nice to meet you, Everett,” Jack said with a sigh, sitting down on an armchair and rubbing his face. “Too bad it’s not under better circumstances.”
               Silence. Then –
               “You don’t seem very happy to be here,” Everett noted. He leaned over, hands on his knees as if to get a good look at Jack’s face without coming too close to his ruined clothes again.
               “Gee,” Jack said dryly, “what gave you that idea?”
               “I don’t understand,” Everett said. “You’ve met your mate, you should be –”
               “He’s not my mate,” Jack cut him off through gritted teeth. “And I’m not going downstairs. I won’t eat with my own kidnapper, I’d rather starve first.”
               “Kidnapper?” Everett demanded. “Goodness, you really don’t know anything about this world, do you?”
               Jack looked up. “Excuse me?”
               But Everett was already bustling around, pulling airy shirts and velvet pants out of the closet as he said, “You are the Wolf King’s mate. Do you understand the danger you’re in outside Crowswood? Outside these very walls, in fact?”
               Jack rolled his eyes. “Stop it, okay? I’ve lived my entire life without even hearing about Crowswood, and I’ve been safe –”
               “Until the stars deemed you King Tiberius’s mate.” Everett set the clothes on his bed with a sigh. “Let me guess. You heard about our wicked little town a few months ago, and haven’t been able to stop thinking about it?”
               Jack blinked. “I –”
               “And you’ve felt something pulling you in,” he continued. “Not just to Crowswood, but to the forest specifically?”
               He sat up. “How’d you know all of that?”
               “Because it’s how they all come in,” Everett said. “It’s how I got here.”
“You’re from the outside?” Jack gaped.
“Relatively,” Everett sighed. “I’m an elf. My home was once in the snowy mountains beyond this forest, and now it’s here. We all feel a pull to our mates, and they feel a pull to us.”
Jack stared. “You’re . . . an elf.”
“No,” he said testily, clutching small jars of herbs that he’d pulled out from a cabinet drawer. “I just have a funny deformity in my ears, and how many men do you know with purple eyes? Honestly.”
***
Chapters 4, 5, and 6 will hopefully go up tomorrow morning. Thank you so much to everyone who’s already read the first three chapters, and a special thank you to the commenters. I can’t tell you what that means ❤
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mixedbag0fmess · 9 months
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Story time!
It’s incredibly pathetic, long, and very much a trauma dump, so it’s under the cut
I tried my very best to make it funny
So lately I’ve been very depressed. Not like, suicide depressed, but very, I can’t get out of bed and it’s 3 in the afternoon, depressed
And today I had my first therapy session, and I realized I’ve been blaming myself for a lot of things that I really shouldn’t be.
I had a really traumatic adventure in the US military, and it’s not my fault at all. I don’t know if I posted the og story, so I’ll post it here
.
I joined the army, because I’m broke and the military takes advantage of that, and I went to basic training.
Now, when you get to basic training, they take you to this place that I can’t remember the name of, and they have you fill out paperwork starting at 4 A-fucking-M, after barely feeding you, when you arrived at 2 AM and haven’t slept since they woke you up at 3 AM the previous day because of a flight that then got postponed 6 hours.
But before you can lay down after you arrive at way-to-early AM, you have to get your uniforms
So a bunch of sleep-deprived, hungry, tired into delirium, new recruits line up to get their uniforms, and in that line, get yelled at by tired ladies about shoes.
Now I am a very very small human being. My shoe size, ring size, and height are just over 5 in their respective measurements. So nothing, literally nothing, the military provided me, fit in the slightest. Including the shoes.
So when I went to get shoes, they started with a 3, which I could barely get on, but was also way to big
So we moved on to a 2, which was even harder to get on, but was still to big
So we tried a 1, which I just flat could not get on.
I still don’t know if it would have fit, but it doesn’t matter, because I didn’t get it. The cranky tired lady insisted the 2 was fine, and while I knew it was to big, I only protested once before I gave up. I was tired AF, I’d been up for over 24 hours at that point, so I really can’t blame 18 yr old me for giving up.
Those boots, were sent by the DEVIL. Even if they fit you, they’re made of solid rubber on the heals and toes and soles, and leather for the sides. They don’t bend or shift. Those shoes hate you, and if they came to life like that one episode of Garfield with the bunny slippers, they would beat you to death with your mothers corpse and laugh at your tears while somehow getting your socks wet because they suck at being shoes
Even it they fit you, your walking into blister town with a chance of lost toe nails
And if they don’t fit you, well, you end up like me
Now I’ll be the first to admit that I am not really all that fit, the most muscle building I’ve ever done was a month on crutches giving me some pretty sweet biceps
However
I was not so out of shape that walking for 5 miles should have been impossible for me, even with blisters
Of which I had many
But it really was super hard
In fact, the 4 miles a few days before had almost literally killed me
And I’m using that word correctly
I had some brief heat stroke, then I went into shock. It was great
Something was definitely wrong, and I had a pain in both of my ankles, emphases on the right one.
I ended up getting some X-rays which found some major bone spurs in both ankles, which sucked
They gave me a huge dose of ibuprofen, and I left
For like, a week and a half, the pain kept getting worse, and even caused me some minor hip pain, and I saw the doctors a few more times
A few more days passed and the pain changed drastically right after a 2 mile ruck from the range
I could pin point the exact spot on my ankle, and to this day, I still know where it was exactly and I knew it was a fracture
I went to sick call, and they decided it was just my bone spurs, without giving me an X-ray
This was the middle of basic training, 5 weeks in
I had 5 weeks to go, with a fractured ankle, and 17 miles of major ruckage to go (though a complete total of 40 miles)
So for 5 weeks, everyone told me I was faking, and spread rumors about how much of a liar I was, and gaslit me into trying things I definitely should not have done
I hated everything and everyone
.
After basic training, I had to start 6 months of AIT
Which was somehow more cowfeathers crazy than basic training
There was more drama and politics in one week than all of my years of school combined
The first day, they say how badly I was limping and sent me the the military doctors as soon as they could
(Side Note: military doctors are not real doctors, they have grand total of 1 year of training from beginning to end, unless they’re like, a surgeon, they get real training)
They tried to rush the healing process, and if I didn’t have a magical doctors note, which could keep me from leaving this personal hell, it didn’t matter how much pain I was in, I must be completely functional, the paperwork said so
All that gave me 3 brand new mental illnesses, and upgraded one of my old ones
It upgraded my imposter syndrome, and gave me depression, anxiety, and PTSD
I honestly can’t give any specific details because trying to remember any of that stuff it going to send me into a panic attack
.
And I’ve been blaming myself for picking the wrong shoes, and for not being louder to the doctor, for not standing up to the horrible drill sergeants during AIT, for how I used the crutches, for not speaking up when that one bitch sergeant had us literally stand there for 2 fucking hours, directly causing the pain in my right side
The only one of those things that could be remotely my fault is how I used the crutches, but even then, if standing for too long hurt my other leg, it wouldn’t matter how I used the crutches
None of this is my fault, I said what was wrong, I said what the problem was, I did what I was supposed to, it’s not my fault that nobody else did.
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cloomsday · 9 months
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im so so so fucking anxious. all the time. fuck. idk life stuff generally but also family...
like ive been in Greece for a full month now and my dad is just. himself. I definitely should not have relied on him for anything. we get to our summer place and for a full ass month my dad has just been smoking weed. the summer place is in an undeveloped rural beach town and we have no car, no washing machine, no fridge, no wifi, and no cell service. a week ago my dad got a car, but it’s a stick shift and he refuses to let me drive it for that reason. all I can do, day after day, is walk to the beach on this busy ass road with no sidewalk, since I can’t drive anywhere. the beach gets old after a month. my dad is just high all the time and does not care. I could have been spending this month preparing for technical interviews, but without wifi I can do nothing. I can’t go anywhere either.
ive been spending some time with my aunts, uncles, and cousins out here. they’ve got money, for real. their house has a damn elevator. and besides being rich, they actually, like, love each other. like they are an extremely tight-knit family, and always helping each other out and supporting each other. they host so many parties and like are always hanging out. I know nobody has an absolutely perfect relationship with their family, but I think they’re as close as it gets. my uncle is also like a big deal apparently, besides being a European like backgammon champion, his business is worth dozens of millions and he is also just a charming and chill dude. but the cousins have rich people problems- like the fact that one of them is 30 and has never had a job because she’s pursuing music. the other one dropped hundreds of thousands on flight school here in Europe just to drop out his last year because he decided he wanted an American certification instead.
I dont know. they're my family, and we were really close when we were kids, but some serious drama went down between my dad and them, that was entirely my dads fault, and we didn’t have contact with them for 10 years because of my dad’s orders. after my parents divorce, my mom went to live with them. oh it was all so traumatizing. it was all my dad’s fault. but anyway, time has passed and now it feels weird, that one day we were kids playing together, then ten years pass and they live in a seaside mansion with an elevator and a close family life, while my brother was sleeping at a homeless shelter not too long ago and our mom is dead. I mean its not their fault at all that things turned out this way and in all honestly i’m happy for their success, but its just hard to see them living a life that is far beyond anything I've ever even conceived of for myself. it also seems like they've been so successful that they’ve forgotten about us. they're perfectly nice in every way, but sometimes it feels like they barely seem to care about us aside from some pitiful looks now and then. they definitely dont blame my brothers and i for any of the shit my dad did, but they seem weirded out at us sometimes, like when they ask why I don’t go anywhere and I honestly tell them I don’t have money to do anything. In those situations I feel like being honest is making them look down on me, but im tired of lying to others about the realities of my life to make them comfortable.
anyway, I woke up today at 9am and it was pouring. it was nice to look out the window at the rain. so soothing. I went back to sleep under the pitter patter for a little more and woke up at 3pm. I dont know why, I fell asleep at 1am the night before and that's 13 hours of sleep. by the time I woke up my dad and brothers had already left for a day trip without me. i knew it was father’s day but I guess id momentarily forgot because my uncles and I were trying to figure out logistics for a trip and I called my dad to ask him some planning questions, then  he got upset when he realized id forgotten it was fathers day. shit I guess that was my bad. I said sorry, but I guess he’s still pissed.
so he was out on his day trip and didnt wanna pick me up from my aunts house, so we couldn't celebrate fathers day together. I told my aunt a little last minute that I wouldn't be going out and wanted to join her for dinner with my cousins and uncle, and she literally popped off on me saying there won't be enough food and stuff, and I was trying to say its alright and I can just spend the night on my own and eat out but I just started crying and it was so embarrassing lol.
u know when u just feel it coming, your hands shaking and your eyes watering and u cant blink the tears away fast enough and you look like a fool? damn I got so triggered. and suddenly im in middle school eating lunch alone again, at every holiday eating a microwave dinner alone again because my immediate family cannot stand each other, and I guess my extended just doesn't want much to do with me. fuck I hate eating alone now.
well, they ended up calling me in to eat and there was more than enough food and everything was ok. 
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apocalypticavolition · 11 months
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Let's (re)Read the Hobbit! Chapter 2
Welcome back! Last time, I read The Hobbit’s first chapter, “An Unexpected Party”. This time, my note on “Roast Mutton”. Whereas the last chapter was about introducing our crew of badass height-challenged heisters, this chapter is about establishing their competence in the field. Let me tell you now, the results aren’t great! As always, expect spoilers.
Up jumped Bilbo, and putting on his dressing-gown went into the dining-room. There he saw nobody, but all the signs of a large and hurried breakfast. There was a fearful mess in the room, and piles of unwashed crocks in the kitchen. Nearly every pot and pan he possessed seemed to have been used.
Let the record show that this is what Bilbo Baggins hates.
“What about an early start?”
“You’re lucky I told the dwarves that hobbits are nocturnal!”
“Great Elephants!” said Gandalf, “you are not at all yourself this morning—you have never dusted the mantelpiece!”
Gandalf, you haven’t been in town since Bilbo’s grandpa died. How would you even know his daily routine? Do you just keep one or all of the unaccounted for palantirs in your cloak?
“Thorin and Company to Burglar Bilbo greeting! For your hospitality our sincerest thanks, and for your offer of professional assistance our grateful acceptance.”
“You can’t compliment hobbits verbally after midnight!” - Gandalf Hobbit Fact.
“...we have proceeded in advance to make requisite preparations, and shall await your respected person at the Green Dragon Inn, Bywater, at 11 a.m. sharp.”
Starting with dragons and ending with dragons. This is “bookending”!
To the end of his days Bilbo could never remember how he found himself outside, without a hat, a walking-stick or any money, or anything that he usually took when he went out; leaving his second breakfast half-finished and quite unwashed-up, pushing his keys into Gandalf’s hands, and running as fast as his furry feet could carry him down the lane, past the great Mill, across The Water, and then on for a mile or more.
If not for finding the ring and distracting Gandalf by reminding him of his actual mission on Middle-Earth, Bilbo would have returned to Bag-End to find himself homeless and Gandalf in the midst of a real estate scheme.
“Don’t be precise,” said Dwalin…
“Gandalf says precision gives hobbits gout!”
[Gandalf] had brought a lot of pocket-handkerchiefs, and Bilbo’s pipe and tobacco.
I’m probably going to keep giving Gandalf shit because it amuses me, but he does look out for ol’ B. B. and so do the dwarves. For all his constant whining, they’re actually pretty good traveling companions.
Now they had gone on far into the Lone-lands, where there were no people left, no inns, and the roads grew steadily worse. Not far ahead were dreary hills, rising higher and higher, dark with trees. On some of them were old castles with an evil look, as if they had been built by wicked people.
Silly Bilbo, you’re only going down one road: The Great East Road! Or maybe Gandalf sent you down a bunch of detours. That would be funny to him. Still though, a very subtle bit of misalignment with the continuity.
Also, it would be funny if he was mistaking Weathertop for a castle. Not sure what other ruins he might be spying at this point, or if any particularly evil people built them. But that’s not a misalignment exactly because “as if” doesn’t mean “because it was absolutely true” and because Bilbo would totally think a watchtower was a huge fortress.
It was after tea-time; it was pouring with rain, and had been all day; his hood was dripping into his eyes, his cloak was full of water; the pony was tired and stumbled on stones; the others were too grumpy to talk.
Note that this is one of those stories of heroes on adventures and sure enough the misery of traveling is an immediate theme. I’ve seen quite a few fantasy stories later on where the heroes whine to themselves about how the stories they’ve read don’t ever talk about how miserable stuff is, but when the pre-ur fantasy text is covering it, you really have to wonder how much airport fantasy those authors internalized. Tolkien meanwhile, actually walked the walk thanks to the prematurely named war to end all wars.
“Just when a wizard would have been most useful, too,” groaned Dori and Nori (who shared the hobbit’s views about regular meals, plenty and often).
Exactly, boys. Gandalf is just over the next hill, having cast Mordenkainen’s Magnificent Mansion, laughing at you lot while reclining on a chaise lounge.
Also note that Bilbo is a dandy but he’s not the only one who is more accustomed to a regular, urbane life in the party. This may be relevant in about five minutes.
Dwarves can make a fire almost anywhere out of almost anything, wind or no wind; but they could not do it that night, not even Oin and Gloin, who were specially good at it.
I wonder if this is dwarf magic or just really good training.
Then one of the ponies took fright at nothing and bolted. He got into the river before they could catch him; and before they could get him out again, Fili and Kili were nearly drowned, and all the baggage that he carried was washed away off him.
Let’s be real here: pony smelled a troll or three and immediately bolted towards safety. Fili and Kili almost die in foreshadowing of their inevitable fates, I expect.
“These parts are none too well known, and are too near the mountains. Travellers seldom come this way now. The old maps are no use: things have changed for the worse and the road is unguarded. They have seldom even heard of the king round here, and the less inquisitive you are as you go along, the less trouble you are likely to find.”
Wh- what king? Elrond is the closest thing to a king in these parts and he’s only a lord. Bree is not part of any kingdom at present. Aragorn is ten and nobody has heard of him. The dwarves have been driven out of the mountains. People don’t hear about the king in these parts for the same reason they don’t hear about alien invaders!
Off Bilbo had to go, before he could explain that he could not hoot even once like any kind of owl any more than fly like a bat. But at any rate hobbits can move quietly in woods, absolutely quietly.
And yet I never got any farther than this point in the video game because the damn trolls kept killing me.
Also there was a barrel of good drink at hand, and they were drinking out of jugs. But they were trolls.
Do trolls make barrels and jugs, or are they just stolen goods? It’s hard to tell which of the demi-humans in the Legendarium are meant to be capable of at least rudimentary civilizations and which ones are too dumb. Then again, the trolls here seem a lot smarter than I remember the ones in LotR being.
“Yer can’t expect folk to stop here for ever just to be et by you and Bert. You’ve et a village and a half between yer, since we come down from the mountains. How much more d’yer want? And time’s been up our way, when yer’d have said ‘thank yer Bill’ for a nice bit o’ fat valley mutton like what this is.”
As distasteful as the trolls are, Tolkien gives them some human qualities at this point – another way he stands apart from a lot of his more immediate imitators (more recent works in the genre have caught up or even surpassed him). He doesn’t like mindless, indistinguishable hordes.
A really first-class and legendary burglar would at this point have picked the trolls’ pockets—it is nearly always worth while, if you can manage it—, pinched the very mutton off the spits, purloined the beer, and walked off without their noticing him. Others more practical but with less professional pride would perhaps have stuck a dagger into each of them before they observed it. Then the night could have been spent cheerily.
Bilbo is of course barely level one at this point, let alone legendary.
Of the various burglarious proceedings he had heard of picking the trolls’ pockets seemed the least difficult, so at last he crept behind a tree just behind William.
I guess the Took side of Bilbo is quick to rise to the forefront now that he’s out of town. The rain must have made him much too miserable to be sensible now that there’s something to do.
Trolls’ purses are the mischief, and this was no exception. “’Ere, ’oo are you?” it squeaked, as it left the pocket; and William turned round at once and grabbed Bilbo by the neck, before he could duck behind the tree.
A talking purse is another big oddity for the Legendarium – I don’t think we see any further talking objects. It’s also a bit odd that a troll would have a magic item at all, let alone that such things might be common to them in particular. On the other hand, it works perfectly as a fairy tale.
“Yes, lots,” said Bilbo, before he remembered not to give his friends away. “No none at all, not one,” he said immediately afterwards.
Fool of a Took! I mean uh, I can quite understand why Bilbo immediately ratted his companions out. Poor dude has had no preparation for any real danger.
“Poor little blighter,” said William. He had already had as much supper as he could hold; also he had had lots of beer. “Poor little blighter! Let him go!” “Not till he says what he means by lots and none at all,” said Bert. “I don’t want to have me throat cut in me sleep! Hold his toes in the fire, till he talks!”
This is another good example of the characterization of the baddies I kinda mentioned before. William is a sensitive troll and Bert is a lot more clever than the others give him credit for.
“And I won’t take that from you, Bill Huggins,” says Bert, and puts his fist in William’s eye.
Switching into present tense? I was always told that such behavior was verboten. Yet here we have Tolkien doing it. An innocuous slip not caught in editing? A deliberate stylistic choice? A glitch thanks to the poor work of properly transferring the text between editions? The world may never know unless it’s that last one, but I’m not equipped to check at present.
Before Balin, who was wondering where in all this commotion Bilbo was, knew what was happening, a sack was over his head, and he was down.
Note that Bilbo sneaks around perfectly well and only slips up because his loot literally starts talking. Balin apparently can’t see what’s going on around the fire for shit (you’d think a dwarf might have darkvision) and gets nabbed immediately. Balin may no longer be best dwarf.
Soon Dwalin lay by Balin, and Fili and Kili together, and Dori and Nori and Ori all in a heap, and Oin and Gloin and Bifur and Bofur and Bombur piled uncomfortably near the fire.
Or maybe he keeps the job. At this point they seem less like dwarves and more like another mythical race of diggers and pickax wielders: lemmings. You can’t even say Thorin looks all that good here considering that he’s just let all this happen instead of organizing his fellows into any kind of useful plan as they got whittled down one by one.
[Thorin] jumped forward to the fire, before they could leap on him. He caught up a big branch all on fire at one end; and Bert got that end in his eye before he could step aside. That put him out of the battle for a bit. Bilbo did his best. He caught hold of Tom’s leg—as well as he could, it was thick as a young tree-trunk—but he was sent spinning up into the top of some bushes, when Tom kicked the sparks up in Thorin’s face.
At least he pulls this off! But it’s still a rather lame showing from the party as a whole at this point: if just a couple of the others had shown even the slightest bit of forethought. Meanwhile, Bilbo shows that he’s not remotely competent in actual fighting – and yet he’s still apparently the most capable member of the group, since he still gets into a bush to hide. This is very damning for the dwarves, who aren’t supposed to be dandies and yet can barely manage to be as useless as Bilbo!
“We ain’t got no water, and it’s a long way to the well and all…”
This is a bit of a risky claim, Gandalf, since there’s a river right over yonder. Though I guess since the point is to get them arguing with each other, letting one of them, “Well, aktually,” this bullshit would be a good shortcut. So I guess it only didn’t work since he overestimated their intelligence!
“You’re a booby,” said William. “Booby yerself!” said Tom.
Ladies and gentlemen, the author who defined a genre!
And there they stand to this day, all alone, unless the birds perch on them; for trolls, as you probably know, must be underground before dawn, or they go back to the stuff of the mountains they are made of, and never move again.
When you think about the respective geographies of Middle-Earth and Europe, you have to wonder if these trolls aren’t at the bottom of the North Sea somewhere by now.
They were nearly suffocated, and very annoyed: they had not at all enjoyed lying there listening to the trolls making plans for roasting them and squashing them and mincing them.
Well I hope this teaches them all a valuable lesson about not ending up in sacks. You’d think the descendants of the dwarf who put Last-King Arvedui in a sack and accidentally killed him would learn.
“Why on earth didn’t you mention [the key] before?” they cried.
In Bilbo’s defense, all hobbits are under the impression that Gandalf has the magical ability to open doors. This is not remotely true but hobbits have been known to wait for hours within the immediate proximity of lovecraftian abominations while suffering from their delusion.
Two caught their eyes particularly, because of their beautiful scabbards and jewelled hilts. Gandalf and Thorin each took one of these; and Bilbo took a knife in a leather sheath.
This would be a horrible D&D campaign because there’s no balance at all to the encounters or to the loot! But hey, here’s the first of Bilbo’s rewards that the first chapter hinted at: the beloved Sting.
Then they brought up their ponies, and carried away the pots of gold, and buried them very secretly not far from the track by the river, putting a great many spells over them, just in case they ever had the chance to come back and recover them.
More dwarven magic, unless it was all Gandalf. But since it says “they”, we can safely assume that dwarves are just as capable of outright spell-casting as elves.
“I had not gone very far, however, when I met a couple of friends of mine from Rivendell.”
As stated above, he’d just gone up to the next hill (despite his obviously BS claims of scouting). The elves found him because they were confused as to why there was a mansion in the middle of nowhere.
“Please be more careful, next time, or we shall never get anywhere!”
Silly Gandalf, you’ll be getting everywhere purely because they won’t be careful…
And that’s the end of this chapter! We’re moving along quite nicely, with something kind of resembling an action sequence and strongly resembling danger to up the stakes. Most fantasy books would still be introducing the Prince V’w’l’ss’s wardrobe and long line of extramarital lovers at this point. Next time: magic maps!
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sexyvampkitty · 1 year
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RP Mini-Solo 5: Moving on
I swear...this has been the worse day of my entire life so far...both as a human or as a vampire. I've never known such pain before. I feel like my heart has been ripped out and stomped on...but I'm not the only one. It actually happened. My 'Boo'...now officially my 'ex'...broke up with me today. I'm glad that I never ended up being 'sired' to him...because I would be an even bigger mess right now. I was going to do it myself...when I felt that the time was right...if there even 'is' such a thing...but he got to it first. It's only been a week since I've been seeing my new man...so I didn't really know how to tell my ex 'Boo'...since I've never been in a relationship before...'Hotness' was my first...and my only. I screwed up. Big time. I realize that...and I'm going to have to live with that mistake forever. I never wanted it to go down this way. I even gave him the dreaded 'It's not about you...we can still be friends'...speech...but it looked like he wanted none of that. For the rest of eternity, I will never forget the look on his face...no tears...no sadness coloring his features or reaching his eyes...he just looked pissed...and he barely said two words to me after I confirmed that I was seeing someone else. He just broke our relationship off...after a little over a year. I never wanted to hurt him...not like that. A part of me still loves him...and always will...but I've been drifting apart from him for months now...even if he didn't realize it...not that he was around much to talk to. I still can't stand the fact that I've been branded a cheater and a slut in this town. How is this suddenly all on me? My ex 'Boo'...it's going to take a 'long' time to get used to that word...'ex'...would disappear for weeks or months at a time...without even a simple 'GoodBye'...going Hell knows where and doing Hell knows what while he was away, before coming back home for awhile...and then doing the same thing all over again. Wash...rince...repeat. Or more like...drink...refill...drink again. I finally got tired of being all by myself in this big ass house..tired of sleeping alone at night...tired of having no one to hold me. So...when the new guy showed up in town...I kind of nabbed him...actually...now that I think about it...it was the other way around. I thought that I had found my forever love...and it was wonderful while it lasted...but now I've found someone new...and I guess it's finally time to move on. At least my new Honey and I won't have to sneak around anymore...because that completely sucked. My ex 'Boo' and I stood there...staring at each other...the silence hanging so thick between us that it probably would've choked me if I was still human. Finally, with nothing left to say to him, I turned and walked towards the stairs...slowly climbing up them with my head hung low...continuing down the hallway and into what was once 'our' bedroom. I opened the closet, grabbing the bag that I had first arrived in Mystic Falls with and started packing...tossing in the few items that were actually mine...including my favorite 'Ask Me About The Stake In My Back Pocket black T-shirt...and my purse...skipping all of the clothes that he had bought for me...because they were too painful to look at anymore. When I was done, I zipped up the bag, tossed it over my shoulder, grabbed my cell phone from the bedside table, cramming it in the back pocket of my jeans shorts, looked around at the room one last time...so many happy memories in that room...as well as some really painful ones...then I walked back through the doorway and back down the stairs. Walking over to my now ex 'Boo' one more time...gazing deeply into his beautiful blue eyes...I told him once again that I was sorry...and I hope that he gets the happiness that he truly deserves...stepped up to him...leaned up on my tiptoes to plant a gentle kiss on his cheek and wrapping my arms around him for a quick hug. Then I glanced around the living room slash parlor one last time...turned...and walked towards the door...opening it and stepping foot outside...never looking back... (END)
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