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#I’m. I’m tired yall. real tired.
badolmen · 8 months
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…y’all know that (((they/demons/etc.))) is an antisemetic dog whistle right? Right???
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dansemacabre · 1 month
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i’ve been thinking about “sixer, it would eat you alive” since i read it and. man. every layer you peel back makes it worse. im not a bill apologist but. shit
if you (1) take it at face value, it paints bill as an apologetic murderer in his single (and maybe sole) open moment of regret. he doesn’t let his walls down often- only with ford do we even get to see the remnant of his galaxy, see the “actual remorse” ford describes, get just a hint of his origins. but he does it, because he thinks ford should know.
if you (2) take it from ford’s point of view, as something he committed to journal three, like. wow. imagine being so committed to a being that you’d hunt down and kill the monster that destroyed his home, only to (assumably) figure out later that that being was the monster. the small moments of trust, the “good times”, are so key to manipulation. how long did ford hold onto that one shred of vulnerability? no wonder ford stayed for as long as he did. in his eyes, bill was a survivor. ford wanted to survive too.
(slight tw below for unreality- any time i mention our reality, i mean “our reality” as a narrative device used in the book of bill as a proxy for the idea of bill being in our reality, since he can’t actually be in our reality. all of this is a fictional theory about a show/book with fictional contents!)
but if you (3) remember that “even his lies are lies” and absolutely Nothing bill says should be trusted. Whoo boy. if i read tbob right the book itself is being created in the theraprism (even tho it shows up with the ciphertologists at some point? idk that’s a whole other post). it’s meant to show what the reader wants to see; it manifests in our reality as what the collective fandom wants to see. so if we want to see truth, if we want to see where bill ended up and who he actually is, there’s a non-zero chance that the whole interaction was a complete fabrication.
imagine bill, stuck in the actively harmful, probably earth-illegal theraprism, once again being forced to be “fixed” and molded into something more palatable, being forced to conform no matter how much it hurts. (i know natural uncontrollable mutation ≠ just so much murder and destruction and chaos, but. you can’t ignore the similarities. bill has obviously been thinking about those silly straws.)
he looks back on everything that went wrong, back on his relationship with ford, back through every dimension where he wins. would that one moment, that one truth amid centuries of lies, have saved him from purgatory? if he had just been open? shown his damage? maybe he did think of his parents, or his henchmaniacs (especially the oracle). people who he might have once opened up to. maybe he just wanted to open up to someone again.
so in his own weird way, stuck in a cell, he reshaped reality again. in this reality, for this fleeting moment, he had been someone worth believing. and ford had listened, hell, ford had wanted to help. looking back, knowing how he treated ford, knowing how ford ended up because of it, maybe bill would have said the most honest thing he’d ever told ford: i am the monster, i am not worth your time or belief, and i will eat you alive.
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acourtofquestions · 2 months
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Since (haven’t read CC yet) 3 Maasverse main characters thus far are artists in one way or another (something I love in fandoms and especially these/Maasverse)
With:
Aelin the musician (composer/piano forte player) & appreciator of the arts. Fashionista. & semi-ballerina.
Nesta the dancer (a lil lovely scene tidbit I thought was freeing and mostly fun)
And of course Feyre THE Artist (& best example as this is crucial to how she sees the world).
Especially with the latter 2 in ACOTAR & our Archerons; even their father was a wood carver/sculptor… (let’s stick with the latter phrase… cause it’s too soon for carver to be heard as anything other than CREEPY “bone carver”😅) … so that leaves us with one; Elain.
Random HC here but: what if Elain’s a singer?
Specifically thought of this because of a certain other “singer in the series” ;-) *psst* Azriel the “shadowsinger” cause while I know that’s not what they meant, it sounds fun to me :-)
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peachyykira · 3 months
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Lmao auto payment hit my account and took half my money so… I didn’t have enough for groceries already and now I really don’t. And sales are not happening and just… 🙃
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griffinsboyfriend · 2 years
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You don’t understand. 😔 Gabe was supposed to marry us in book 4.
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courtjestersanonymous · 2 months
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some days it’s really down to the wire in whether I feel well enough to work. I’ll wake up like absolutely not. And after a series of hoops and chemicals I sit down to go “okay ig I can work this shift”
Sad
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bitchapalooza · 5 months
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This whole TikTok ban and “Chinese parent company” bs is so stupid when you realize the mass majority of products sold in the us are at the expense of most likely underpaid and abused Chinese workers. I can’t pinpoint if this is hypocrisy or not, whatever this is, but it’s ridiculous and it’s the least of our concerns.
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thefcmilymcn · 1 year
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Howdy y’all I’m not dead I’m just a man now isn’t that rad
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angelgendered · 6 months
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It is so telling that my mum refuses tos top watching HP whenever it’s on despite me expressing disgust at her support of JKR and despite me telling her that every viewer number puts money in her pocket for real terms attacks on trans and nonbinary youth and adults, she continues to force it onto every tv in the house, still buys HP merch, still goes to HP attractions and related things…
I feel like it’s not too much to ask her to not support JKR because it makes me hella uncomfortable, is it? Or am I being too self centred in wanting a life free of JKR because she literally wants people like me dead or at least detransitioned or not transitioning at all?
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letstrywritingmaybe · 5 months
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I have no business getting another idea. Please don’t let it haunt me. I hate when I do this. We’re not writing it down, this is living in my mind only!!! Or at the very least give me more fluff. There’s been too much angst and I hate it. Must be why this idea got to me. I’m guilty of it too, but I know I’m not the worst offender cause I’m a massive baby. Damn it I might want to write this fic. Can someone please just write something cute so I can gush over it? Please, I’m begging. Stop hurting my queen, I cannot take it anymore!
Update: I vaguely jotted down the idea, no title or anything. But also read back through my ideas list and kinda wish I would’ve written some of those. I may need to make a new list of fics I’ll never write again. But we don’t have time for that. I gotta finish at least one of my WIPs before I do that again
(Unrelated note technically I started Lo Lo Lost but I don’t count it cause it’s literally two sentences then I’m like nope cause this is about to be all sorts of messy and I need fluff not more craziness)
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starlooove · 1 year
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I need the whole queer discourse thing to progress past interpersonal usage. Whether someone personally refers to themselves as queer or not quite literally does not fucking matter, the only thing worth discussing atp is how widespread that usage may be (calling it the queer community, is it reclaimed enough for ppl outside the community to say it in that specific way, etc.)
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babylonsfalling · 10 months
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god okay just. misandry is a real thing and i’m just not even going to have this conversation anymore
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rainyraisin · 1 year
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I have exams all week and I’m gonna be too exhausted to draw much between exams and revision and also just school in general so I might just reveal reticent spoilers randomly for the funsies and also to just say sorry that y’all ain’t gonna be getting much content till like next Wednesday prolly cause I think that’s when my exams end (not this weeks Wednesday but next weeks)
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leon-s-kennedys · 1 year
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so how do i block ppl on here lol..
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raeathnos · 4 months
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#hello hi I am so fucking burnt out 🫠 pls forgive me if I’m inactive for a bit or real fucking weird if I am here#I was supposed to have a 3 day weekend but an hour before I was done it got turned into another 6 day week soooooo 🙃#we had terrible storms yesterday and I worked with no power and then came home to no power (it didn’t come back till 8:40pm hELP)#cat had a vet appointment which ended up being super emotionally draining and upsetting#his heart disease has worsened and he’s on more medication#and though none of these things are ever set in stone it’s looking more and more likely that he won’t live as long as a typical cat#I uh thought I was okay and then just kind of completely broke down sobbing last night#and I can’t really think too hard about it without bursting right back into tears#he’s only 6 and a half and the sweetest cat and it’s not fair#trying to stay positive but I feel so bad for him#gonna love him as much as I can for as long as he’s here which is hopefully still for a long while#it’s not a dire situation it’s just the disease progressing but like it’s still hard#dealing with too much rn#we were expecting the vet bill to be about $400 but then opted to do a few extra things and it pushed it to $750 so ouch#we’re fine we had it saved but you know how it is#he expensive but he’s worth every penny <3#I also injured my knee so that’s fun- tore something in it I think#it’s not as bad as it was but it’s still painful and swollen and hard to bend#my dumbass is going hiking tomorrow despite this because it’s the first weekend that isn’t supposed to rain since like March#so as soon as I get out of work tomorrow I’m fucking off into the woods for a few hours to go be feral#probably bad for the knee but it’ll be good for the mental health#works only a half shiift tomorrow too and I’ll be done in the am so it should still feel like a long weekend#kinda bummed about it still tho#pls stop depending on me to pick up everyone’s slack kthnxbye#I’m so fucking tired 🫠#on the bright side I have next weekend requested off and it’s only gonna be a 4 day work week because of the holiday#there’s a rock and mineral show here next weekend and I am very excited#gonna buy some neat rocks hopefully 👍🏻#and assuming the weather is good next weekend and my knee doesn’t worsen I’m gonna fuck off into the woods again afterwards to be feral#gotta go rot in the woods for a bit to fix the soul; yall know how it is
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pupkashi · 3 months
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satoru loves you & he’s tired of being your friend
a/n: loosely inspired by taehyungs song fri(end)s i hope u guys like pls lmk what yall think plsplsplspls
word count - 1,764
masterlist
the only light illuminating your living room was from your tv as it played your favorite comfort movie, one you’d seen countless times before. the familiarity of it had you dozing off on your couch, in and out of sleep as you lost the battle with your heavy eyelids.
there’s a soft knock on your door that has you jumping out of your skin, heart racing loudly in your ears. you pause the movie, wondering if maybe you’d hallucinated it and it truly was time for you to go to bed.
knock, knock, knock
your palms are sweaty, checking your phone before standing up. there’d been no missed texts or calls from anyone you knew, who the fuck knocks on a door at 3:24 in the morning?
you grab the baseball bat by the door, peeking through the peephole and being met with tousled white locks. a color of hair you’d be able to spot a mile away, one you’d grown to care for.
“what are you doing at my door at four in the fucking morning?” you whisper-yelled, setting the bat down and opening the door wider to let the man in. he gives you a small smile, one hand pushing his hair back and out of his face and the other holding his side.
“sorry sweet cheeks, didn’t wanna go home just yet” he mumbles, stepping in and standing by the doorway, waiting for your instruction.
“d’you get hurt? are you bleeding?” the annoyance in your voice is gone, and it makes satoru relax. he gives you a small nod, shrugging his shoulders and trying to play it off.
“nothing that won’t be healed by mornin’” you roll your eyes at him, muttering a small ‘come on’ and walking to the bathroom down the hall. “i miss you y’know” satoru says softly, watching as you searched for the first aid kit under the sink, grabbing the box and making him sit on the toilet lid.
“did you really?” you scoff, not meeting his gaze as you grab a soft rag, running it under warm water. satoru furrows his brows, confused as to why you think he wouldn’t have missed you.
“‘course i did,” he replies, opening his mouth to continue but closing it quickly when you turn to face him.
“can i take your blindfold off” you ask, your hands fiddling with the damp rag before setting it down when he nods ‘yes.’ you find the small knot hiding in his hair, gently undoing it.
the black blindfold loosen instantly, and you’re quick to gently take it off his head, setting it on the counter. his hair flops onto his forehead, falling almost perfectly to frame his face. despite the countless times you’d seen his eyes, your breath still hitched in your throat when you looked into them.
you try not to stare too long, brushing his hair out of his face and cleaning the dried blood on his face. satoru doesn’t take his eyes off you, eyes tracing your every feature. his gaze is one you always faltered under, growing nervous when he’d stare at you for too long.
“what” you ask, a small nervous smile forming on your face. satoru shakes his head, a small upside down smile on his face as you wipe the cut on his cheeks with an alcohol wipe.
“you’re just real pretty” he says, watching as you bite your bottom lip, surely trying to stop the smile fighting its way into your face.
“is you side hurt too?” you motion to where his hand is covering, trying to brush past the compliment he’d given you.
“healed it up a good amount while you were cleaning me up” he shrugs, lifting his shirt and showing you the brand new scar, “I’m not completely helpless.”
“no you’re the strongest” you tease, throwing away the used items and washing your hands. “did you wanna shower? you look like you could use it” satoru pouts at your words.
“don’t have to be so mean about it” you laugh softly, drying your hands before you’re standing in front of him again. you let your hands brush through his hair, exposing his forehead before you press a kiss to the skin.
“sorry angel, you’re the one who woke me up” satoru lets his eyes close softly, heart sinking a bit when you pull away from him.
“I’ve got some clothes you’ve left over so I’ll leave ‘em on the counter” you smile, closing the door behind you and sighing softly.
how’d you get to this point? how’re you stuck between friends and something more?
friends don’t feel the way you do about satoru. friends don’t place feathery kisses on their friends scars. friends don’t act the way you two act.
satoru steps out of the shower, smiling when he realizes his clothes smell like you. his heart leaps when he exits the restroom, finding you still awake and waiting for him on the couch.
“waiting for someone?” his voice makes you jump a bit, shaking you head and watching as he sits next to you. “did you have plans for tomorrow?” he questions, watching as you send a text.
“told them something came up,” you shrug, “figured you need me more.”
the words tugged on satoru’s heartstrings. there was a never night you hadn’t been there when he needed you. you’d been there for him since the day you’d met him, there to comfort him and ease his racing mind. you were there to calm him from panic attacks and frustrations, help him through grief and stress. everything.
you were a great friend.
he hated that word. you weren’t his friend, you were something more. he knew how he felt about you, he had an inkling feeling you felt the same. so what’s stopping him?
satoru shakes the question out of his head, focusing instead on the tv. the end credits are rolling but you’re not looking away, eyes unfocused and your mind elsewhere.
“should we go to sleep?” satoru whispers, a feathery touch to snap you back to reality. you nod with a small smile, the two of you making the familiar walk to your bedroom, satoru turning off any lights and closing the bedroom door behind him before slipping in next to you.
you’d always liked having your head on his chest, you were able to hear his heartbeat this way. the rhythmic pitter-patter never failed to make you smile or help you relax. it also gave away anytime he was nervous.
“your hearts beating real fast” you state, not looking up, instead continuing to draw circles in the palm of his hand. “what are you thinking about?”
there’s too many thoughts in satoru’s head, so many that he can’t begin to process a single one of them. so instead he blurts out what had been on his mind all night.
“i love you.”
you never thought people were telling the truth about time stopping when something like this happened. you’d always figured they romanticized their life a little too much.
but you felt time stop.
your fingers faltered and you felt your breathing hitch in your throat. your stomach erupted in butterflies, face hot and your eyes wide as the three words landed on your ears.
there was a million thoughts in your head, memories flooding in. spring nights around a fire pit, hot summer days at the beach, cool autumn afternoons carving pumpkins and cold winter mornings drinking hot chocolate. and in every one of them you bit back three words while staring at the white haired man.
“you don’t have to say it back” satoru begins, his heart beating even faster than before, “i just- I’ve been think-” you sit up quickly and cut him off, shaking your head and finally looking him in the eyes.
“I love you too,” you smile, letting yourself enjoy the the moment of euphoria the two of you felt upon hearing the other say the three words you’d dreamt of.
there’s only a second of silence before satoru’s blue eyes are looking at your lips, flickering up to meet your eyes momentarily. all it takes is you leaning in ever so slightly.
his hands are cupping your cheeks, crashing his lips against yours, a sense of urgency as his lips move against yours. he tastes like his vanilla lip balm and toothpaste, smiling as the words replay in your head.
“what’s funny?” he mumbles against your lips, laughing softly, not bothering to pull away from your lips. satoru’s cerulean eyes are fluttering open, completely focused on you.
you pull away a couple inches, staring into his eyes, you can see the emotions swimming in his eyes, love and excitement written over his face as he takes in your beauty.
“just happy” you reply, “never thought you’d put the end in friends” satoru pouts comically at your words, shoving his face in your lap and groaning softly.
“‘m sorry” he grumbles, “new to all the relationship stuff” there’s genuine frustration and remorse in his voice, it makes you smile as your run your fingers through his hair, tugging softy.
“‘s okay” you say, “thought technically I’m not yours since you haven’t asked me” he knows you’re poking fun at him, not rushing him into anything.
“don’t worry,” he says, sitting up and adjusting himself to lay down next to you, smiling when you lay your head on his chest, “gonna make you mine as soon as i can.”
the words make your heart flutter again, a sheepish smile on your face as your cheeks and ears burn.
“alright smooth talker let’s get some sleep.”
funny enough satoru feels the weight on his shoulders grow lighter with your body weight pressed against him. he feels a sense of serenity running his fingers up and down your exposed skin.
you can see goosebumps rise where your fingertips touch, smiling softly and holding back a giggle as your fingers ghost over his abs, causing him to shiver.
it’s different from before, more intimate.
satoru wonders why he was so afraid of baring his heart to you in the first place. he can’t find an excuse as he watches the golden ray of sunshine hit your face softly, causing you to stir. he’s still as he watches you immediately nuzzle your face into his side, falling back into a deep sleep in his arms.
it doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep too, a smile on his face when he feels your grip tighten.
lovers, he thinks, it has a nice ring to it.
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