#I'll be needing another 5 or so years to get to that level....

[godofthestupid]

Ya know? I wanted to study how Gamma draws

Bitch doesn't even need guidelines anymore he just draws and it looks good

[incorrectbatfam]

Do the batfamily members ever get too into their undercover work? (Undercover in an office and theyre worried about spreadsheets, working in a warehouse and coming home complaining about missing parts)

Bruce: Status updates on your undercover missions. Dick, you first. What have you got down at the docks?

Dick: I haven't confirmed the Killer Croc sightings yet, but more importantly, our catch hasn't been measuring up to last year's. Tuna we're doing okay on, but the salmon population seems to be on the low end. I've contacted the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries but it'll be another 3-5 business days before they can come down and check it out.

Bruce: At least you're doing something to help. Jason?

Jason: Class was okay. I think the kids are warming up to me as their substitute while Mrs. Maloney is out on maternity leave. The average on the last vocabulary quiz was 83.53% so either I'm doing my job right or they need to be challenged. I'm worried about Tristan Lancy, though. He's normally a good student but his grades have been dropping recently and his parents don't seem like safe people to tell. I'll talk to him tomorrow and try to pair him up with a peer tutor if he needs it.

Bruce: Also see if he has any alternate contacts besides his parents. Tim, any updates at the chemical plant?

Tim: If by updates you mean OSHA violations, I could go on all week. We got a batch of new recruits today and they were just thrown into the work—no PPE, no safety training, nothing. This is what happens when you place production over employee well-being. I'm gonna file a complaint after this meeting. Also, I think the union will have something to say about the manager cutting people's lunch breaks short.

Bruce: I see. Damian? Please tell me you found something volunteering at the zoo.

Damian: Depends on how you define "found." While I have not obtained evidence of a mutant larvae black market, I did help some of the animals at the sanctuary make progress with their recovery. Bobo the monkey is healing from his broken arms and we're gradually getting him re-acclimated to climbing higher surfaces. Suzie the black bear was born a little prematurely but seems to be catching up to her peers in terms of growth. Lastly, we got a grant for additional wildcat research and enrichment. As an aside, we are having an educational seminar on European mountain goats this Friday at 3:30 and I expect all of you to be there.

Bruce: I'll put that on our calendars. Steph?

Steph: It's not really undercover work for me, just work. Anyway, yes the newest Batburger location is being used for money laundering. But I really need to vent about the customers for a sec. We don't open until 10 and at 9:30 this morning some moron was banging on our door demanding Jokerized cheese fries. Then right in the middle of the lunch rush, Janie got sick so I had to fill in as the cashier and it was hell. After that, I had to step in between a fight at the drive-thru because the customer claimed we only gave him nine pieces of his ten-piece Robin nuggets and tried to beat up the kid who took his order. And to top it all off, an entire high school hockey team came in five minutes before closing.

Bruce: Cass?

Cass, blowing balloons: Can't talk. Arranging bat mitzvah.

Bruce: Duke, you're my last hope.

Duke: Margie's bringing a peanut butter chocolate cake to the bake sale. I swiped her recipe and we can easily beat her. Her ganache is way too watery and just runs off the top of the cake, which isn't even leveled. She's also trying to do something with a raspberry filling that isn't working at all. It's like she couldn't decide on what to bring. The bake sale committee also asked if we can bring some apple pies because the original baker has to go out of town for a family emergency. I think we'll win if we bring them with some ice cream and a touch of caramel, even though this isn't a contest.

Bruce: Thank you. At least our most critical case has been taken care of.

Barbara: ...I'll save my book launch for later.

[mulligans-tavern]

https://www.tumblr.com/doomed-to-wanda/747617028751474688?source=share

Inspiration above

TW death, grief

---

Five Funerals

They lose Fig first.

Comes with the territory when you're an archdevil - somebody's always looking to take your spot. "Don't worry about it," she says, opening a Planeshift to the recording studio. "It's just the usual rebellious fiends. Icythorz and Bolhondrus and the rest. I'll be back before you know it." She looks resplendent in black leather, the Unfaithable Bass slung across her back, riding the fiery Daymare surrounded in jagged red shards.

Adaine knows before everyone else, but can't believe the vision to be true until she learns that Ayda is gone, too. She scratched every memory of Fig out of her notes before starting over - it was too much pain to bear. The five of them know how it feels.

---5---

It's a few years before they take another hit. Another mission to the Mountains of Chaos, another world-ending calamity to be stopped because Who Else Is Going To Save The World? A small misstep, a miscalculation (six where there should be five, they're only five now) and suddenly the routine becomes deadly.

Riz takes the fall. "It's easier this way," he says, in his last moments. "I'll still see you." And he does. Agent Gukgak Jr., now, with some extra responsibility. But he still comes by. Sometimes. Every so often. Often enough.

---4---

Kristen is next. Only one thing could bring down the most gifted cleric of the age - sacrificing herself for her friends. Third time's the charm when it comes to death, it turns out.

Gorgug is the most hopeful that she'll come back, that she'll find a way again, like in the Nightmare Forest. But Adaine knows this is the end. Even Arthur Aguefort agrees. He quotes Alanis Morissette at her funeral. The followers of Cassandra pull out all the stops.

Adaine, Fabian, and Gorgug have their own ceremony at Ashgrove, next to the Gukgak family plot. It's quiet. Bucky cries into Ragh's shoulder. Aelwyn, Jawbone, and Gertie collect flowers. Tracker stays for a few minutes to say goodbye.

---3---

They quit adventuring after Kristen's funeral. And they don't lose anyone else for a long time. Riz still visits, every few years. They talk about the good old days, how silly it was that Baron was so terrifying when at the end of the day it was an honest conversation that finally did him in. There's rumours that Kristen has ascended to goddesshood herself - Adaine doesn't buy it. She's not the type to be revered.

They come out of retirement for the only reason they would - to bring back one of their own. They finally found Fig's soul, trapped in a ruby in the darkest levels of the Abyss. They can't ask anyone to come with them - it's too dangerous, it's too personal. It's missions like this that kill people.

And when it's all over, when Adaine carries Fabian's burnt, unconscious body back to Morded Manor, they have another funeral to plan.

Gorbag and Roz have already passed, and Wilma and Digby are too old to make preparations, so it falls to Jawbone to organize it. He knows they don't want a lot of fanfare. It's at Ashgrove again, just Adaine and Fabian and the Thistlesprings, and Aelwyn and Ragh. Sandra-Lynn is back in Solace - she sends Adaine a heartfelt text saying she appreciates the invitation, but she can't bring herself to come.

Riz doesn't show for the ceremony - he's desperately scouring the heavenly realms, trying to make sure Gorgug ended up somewhere he wasn't afraid of. Orcish heaven doesn't have him, he reports, and neither does Cassandra.

If he's trapped in the Abyss with Fig, at least they have each other.

---2---

Adaine sees Fabian's death the night of Gorgug's funeral. She needs to prepare, she tells herself. She knows it's going to be hard. She needs all the time she can get, and she needs to know which goodbye will be their last.

They grow old together. Not romantically, although some speculate. Fabian becomes a multiclass advisor at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy. Adaine works in Bastion City as an archivist, with occasional trips to Fallinel for Oracle services. They go for vacations sometimes, but never for too long. The memories find them no matter where they go. Sometimes Adaine wishes she could be Ayda, scrape off the old wounds and start fresh. Arthur talks about her sometimes. She's never had the same spark as that one lifetime, he says.

Adaine watches the wrinkles grow beside Fabian's eye, watches his hair turn grey, watches the Future of Dance become its Mentor. He trades his Battlesheet for a cane-sword, then a regular cane. He takes to wearing the Gregorian necktie to classes, no matter how much it clashes with his outfit. They both wonder how many of their own teachers lost party members.

Adaine holds Fabian's wrinkled hand on his deathbed, in his old room at Seacaster Manor. He grins, flashes the same perfect teeth as on the first day of Freshman Year. "Bet you didn't see this one coming, did you?"

"I did," she whispers, tears streaming down her young elven face. "I knew it would end like this. But I always hoped it would last forever."

They're the last words he hears.

It's not the first funeral Adaine organizes. All the Bad Kids held one for Buddy Dawn, back in high school. She and Fabian worked together on the services for Jawbone, Ragh, and Chungledown Bim - who finally caught up to Fabian in both of their old ages. It is the first funeral she has to organize alone.

Some of Fabian's students attend. Arthur Aguefort gives a short speech, and a few students hear the story of Kalvaxus' return for the first time. Adaine sits with Aelwyn in the front row, a few seats down from Hallariel. Gilear records the service to show Telemaine later. Riz is somewhere deep undercover - he maybe hasn't even heard yet.

She always knew she'd be the last. She didn't expect it to hurt so much.

---1---

Adaine stumbles through a few years before she finds herself again. They pass so fast without a mortal lifespan to hold up against them. She drifts between Fallinel and Bastion City for the most part, with occasional return trips to Elmville. Aelwyn always has a place for her to stay. Seacaster Manor was turned into a dormitory for Aguefort students who needed a place to study, or sleep, or stay away from home for a while. Tracker converted Morded Manor into a temple/bed-and-breakfast for worshipers of Galicaea. Strongtower Luxury Apartments was demolished soon after Fabian started teaching at Aguefort. It seems like everything is different now.

Adaine visits Leviathan once, on a whim. The Compass Points hasn't changed a bit. On a chance meeting in the stacks, Ayda looks at her with a spark of familiarity.

"Adaine Abernant?"

"Yes... you remember me?"

Ayda shakes her head. "There are mentions of you in my journals. I leave journals for when I regenerate-"

"I know. I remember."

Ayda looks intrigued. "I wrote that you were a great wizard, and a good friend. I hear from other sources that you are the Elven Oracle. Perhaps you can shed some light on why the pages around yours are torn to shreds or redacted to the point of unreadability?"

Adaine places a gentle hand on Ayda's shoulder. "I don't know if you'd want that. You lost someone you cared about, so much that you thought it was better to forget her than to bear the pain of losing her."

Ayda considers this. "Is it better to forget?" she asks. "Would you give up the memories of those you lost, in order to keep a logical mind?"

"No. Not for anything."

"Then we should talk."

Adaine smiles. "I'd like that."

---2---

*end

Thanks for reading all the way through! I wrote most of this at 2am and the conclusion the next morning. Please take a reblog to share with your friends or drop a like to let me know you enjoyed - or hated - the story!

Ask me anything about it, please, I love discussing these kinds of theories!!!

[viaoverthemoon]

I have a small request here too✋ I was thinking about Leon (damnation maybe) x fem!reader with reader being his daughter's kindergarten teacher, and the little one falls in love with her and wants to spend more time with reader, and Leon he finds himself forced to accept this, so he falls in love with the reader. It can be with smut at the end or just something romantic, it doesn't matter.

I hope I explained it ok, I've had this idea in my head for some time but I don't know how to express it 😂❤️❤️

Oooo this sounds so cute stawpppp.

Since I have another fic in the works that's drenched in smut, I'll keep this one fluffy. ;)

Damnation!Leon Kennedy x Fem!Reader

Summary: You're a kindergarten teacher for Leon Kennedy's daughter and she wants to keep you forever!

Tw: Fluff, Mention of deceased relative, Mention of past miscarriage

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!

Enjoy! <3

To Belong

❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁

"Congratulations, Arabella! It looks like you're our student of the week!"

You gently place the pin on Arabella's shirt, smiling widely at her proud expression.

Being a kindergarten teacher definitely has its downs. But also has its ups as well. One of those ups being the honor of teaching these innocent children. Every day is something new, a new experience that makes you realize the importance of raising the next generation.

Arabella turns towards you, smiling so wide her cheeks must hurt. She grabs onto your leg. "Thank you, Miss (L/N)! This means so much to me!"

You smile down at her, proud of her for using the feelings lesson you'd taught her, and crouch to her level to give her a hug. "You're welcome, Arabella! I'm so proud of you. Thank you for being such a kind student!"

She seems to take your praise very seriously, being super kind to her classmates and staying by you side, asking if you need help or service in any kind of way.

❁

At the end of the day when everyone has left, you sit alone at your desk.

Whilst flipping from one graded paper to another, the door to your classroom creaks open.

You raise your head just in time to see Arabella run into the room, screaming with her arms in the air. "MISS (L/N)!!!!"

You laugh as she runs around your desk and hugs you, babbling nonsense excitedly. "Oh my goodness! Back so soon, Arabella?"

She gives a hyper nod. "Yes!"

"'Yes ma'am', Bella."

Your eyes snap up, locking with a pair of bright blues.

You look at him, surprised.

The man held a strong resemblance to Arabella, minus the straight blonde hair Arabella carried. They shared blue eyes and a soft face. If anything, his rough exterior yet light features suited him. Gave him a mysterious and alluring air that draws people to him, searching to learn more about him.

"Oh- yes ma'am- Daddy look, look! This is the nice teacher I was telling you about!"

You rise from your chair and hold out a hand with a smile. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Kennedy."

He shakes your hand and offers a nod. "Pleasure to meet you too, Miss (L/N). As you can see, I've heard quite a lot about you."

He gives his daughter a pointed look that makes you laugh. You gesture to the seat across from your desk, offering him a seat as you settle back into your chair. "I assume there's a reason you're here that I could help you with?"

Mr. Kennedy sits in the chair, seemingly tired as he falls into the seat and instinctively spreads his legs.

You try your hardest not to acknowledge the action, but your eyes fail you, flickering down his frame for half a second before returning to his face.

You instantly regret your mistake when he smirks at you, straightening up just a bit and resting his arms on his legs. "Actually, I was hoping to discuss what Arabella's behaviors are like while she's at school, as well as how she's learning." He pauses. "I mean, obviously if she's getting student of the month for the 2nd time, she's doing pretty good."

He smiles and playfully ruffles Arabella's hair, earning a laugh from the 5-year-old. "But still. It would be nice to hear from her teacher, not her."

You clear your throat and nod, turning away to escape the burn of his gaze and pulling out a folder labeled A.K., Arabella Kennedy's character chart.

"Of course, I understand. Let's start with how she handles assignments."

❁

After about 45 minutes of talking, Leon seems satisfied with his daughter's school life and begins to pack up his things to leave. But Arabella becomes upset, running to you and refusing to let go of your leg.

"No! I'm not ready to say bye to Miss (L/N) yet!"

She throws the standard child tantrum, small tears streaming down her reddened puffed out cheeks as you gently try to coax her into letting go.

"Arabella... Don't be upset. You'll see me again on Monday-"

But she's relentless, shaking her head and kicking away Mr. Kennedy's hands as he tries to reach for her.

Eventually, he sighs and looks at you embarrassingly. "I'm so sorry Miss (L/N). She's hardly ever like this."

Seeing as this is something you deal with all the time, you just shake your head, offering a small smile. "Don't worry about it. I'm used to this behavior... I'm about to leave for the day. If you guys want, we could go out for a quick dinner? This way, we won't have to part so soon."

This gets the crying 5-year-old to quiet down almost immediately. She looks up from your leg, tears and snot smeared all over your pant leg. "Really? Can we?"

You look up at Mr. Kennedy, raising a brow for conformation. And, seeing as there was no way around it, he gives in.

❁

And from that moment forward, you and the Kennedy family became quite close.

You shared a few dinners and spent time together at amusement parks and entertainment events, eventually becoming so close that you'd even watch Arabella when Leon had to leave for reasons of his job.

You listen to his stories, and he listens to yours.

He shares how he and Arabella have no one else to depend on. Her mother, although she and Leon didn't have a good relationship, had died during childbirth. And how he'd lost his own parents long ago, growing up an orphan and not having much.

And you share only having your parents. You could have had a little one yourself, but unfortunately grieved a harsh miscarriage and the father of the child leaving soon after didn't help.

You both end up having more in common than you'd originally thought.

And now, you share more than just experiences and memories. Now, you share shy looks and ghostly touches.

Somedays his hand will graze yours and you both will avoid each other's gaze, ignoring the sudden spark that comes when you make contact.

That is until, one night Leon returns from a particularly long job to find you curled up on his living room couch with a book in hand, reading glasses perched on the bridge of your nose.

"Hey, sorry for the long night. Never meant to be gone that long." He shrugs off his leather jacket and throws it over the arm of his second couch.

You eye his fatigued figure for a moment before removing your glasses and putting down your book. "No, it's alright. You know I don't mind, Leon."

Sitting up, you pat the spot next to you on the couch, offering him a seat. "Arabella's upstairs asleep in her room..." He gives a soft grunt and falls on the couch, rubbing the back of his neck while nodding and muttering a 'Good. Thank you.'

Eyes skillfully assessing his behavior, you decide to ask him the question that's been on your mind. "Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

He glances at you through his peripheral but instantly looks away. "Yes. I'm fine. You can go now."

In all honesty, the way he suggested you leaving hurt your feelings. But you didn't relent. "If it's alright with you, I'd like to stay..."

Reaching a hand out, you place it on top of his on his lap. He flinches slightly, but doesn't push you away. He pauses for a second...

And then he relaxes, flipping his hand over to wrap it around yours.

Your heart is in your throat and the palms of your hands begin to sweat. But you don't show it, smiling shyly at Leon and holding his hand.

He doesn't look at you. Doesn't show any signs that he acknowledges you besides the fact that he isn't letting go of your hand. "Why do you stay? Why do you want to stay?"

The monotone question catches you off guard. You momentarily freeze as his eyes find you.

Blue frozen glaciers filled with oceans and rivers of pure sadness and regret. The emotion in his eyes makes you briefly wonder where he finds the space for the happiness he feels with Arabella.

Or if he'll have the space for happiness with you.

You take a moment to think, looking down at your linked hands and gliding a thumb over the warmth of his skin. "I feel happiest when I'm here with the two of you. As you know, I don't have much. All I've had to look forward to has been my students... but now... I have the both of you."

You look him in the eyes, trying to convey your emotions through the look in yours. "These past few weeks have been the best I've lived through in years... I'm tired of living alone, Leon. Life is worth so much more when you spend it with somebody else."

He looks at you in shock, not sure what to say about your sudden confession. His mouth opens and closes like a fish, trying to choose the right words to say.

You look away bashfully. "Er- What I'm trying to say is... I'd like it if we could spend... more time together. And see each other more often. But-! It's completely up to you, of course."

For a moment, the silence is nerve wracking. You try not to fidget too much or show that you're anxious in awaiting his answer.

You're beginning to lose hope when Leon's hands are suddenly on your hips.

You're so surprised by his actions that you hardly notice him gently coaxing you into sitting on his lap.

Your legs straddle his thighs, backside rested on his knees when you suddenly notice your position. Your face burns hot, and you rest your hands on his shoulders.

His hands find purchase on your waist. "If I'm being honest, I expected you to leave us a long time ago... I didn't mean to be rude. I just didn't think you'd stay."

He caresses your sides, warm hands heating through the fabric of your clothes. "And... I would like it- a lot if you stayed with us. Not only would you make me happy, but you'd make Arabella happy too. And that matters more than anything."

You pretend to ponder on your decision, looking away with a small smile on your face before turning back to Leon. "Well... I guess I can stick around-"

The sentence barely leaves your lips before Leon pulls you in, kissing you with so much relieved passion that you momentarily feel dizzy.

And for once, you feel like you truly belong somewhere.

Yes. This feeling is definitely one you can get used to.

❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁❁´◡`❁

Nobody: My inbox screaming and crying for help: 😓😭😭☠️ Me with 0 internet or data: 🧍🏾‍♀️💃📖

Hope you enjoyed!

More requests coming soon!

Requests are open!! <3

[ladyyatexel]

Hey, what's up, hello, I'm Xel, I truly have Donald Duck levels of bad luck and yet I do not have the rage button that makes things work out if I throw a tantrum, which feels like yet another failure of media, what is the deal with this.

The deal is:

Temp job had to let me go instead of make me permanent because the economy scared the 5 people over 65 in that department out of feeling safe enough to retire

None of my applications are getting interviews and I don't know what I'm doing wrong. Donald Duck tantrum did not assist me in this realm.

Holy shit seasonal depression I can't get out of bed like.... A Lot.

I have a convention to go to in February where I am selling art in the art show and where I will see many of my friends the only time per year.

I'm scared of everything haha wow 😬

I'm am an artist who just feels too upset and worried to art

I'm having trouble getting everything together and maybe will feel better with some level of stability? I need to do a lot of paperwork. It is proving hard. I have the Tumblr popular suspicions about my level of neurodivergance. (Fun story: I told members of my my family that I have thought in the last two years especially that I might have ADHD or Autism or something, and my cousin said, "Oh, honey *just the last two years?*" Obliterated.)

My abusive dad recently joined a cult and my grandmother thinks he'll try to contact me after 15 years and I'm fucking scared of him and that is Affecting Me in A Way boy howdy.

I do not have the money to pay rent even a little bit! I'm trying to get January and February taken care of maybe? So I can try to exist for this period of time and maybe not have a breakdown or get evicted or something?

Some real not awesome medical junk happening also because why not.

SO, I'm doing Tumblr's favorite thing and being a starving queer artist with brain worms who needs help. If you are interested in helping me out and making a donation to the "Why don't my Donald Duck tantrums solve my problems" fund, I would be Really Grateful.

I am on Ko-Fi, which is really just a funnel to PayPal, over here.

$2500 would keep me on solid ground. I'll try to keep a tally here in a read more along with a expenses tally if that would help you feel better about me! I know I've had to ask frequently in the last few months, so I understand thinking I'm full of it.

I have a commission to finish currently and a few buttons and things that need to be mailed. You could also ask for button and commission, but I am doing prep work for my part of the art show in mid February, so I'm not available until after then for that!

My grandfather used to do a Donald Duck impression that was really good and it convinced me that either he WAS Donald Duck or that old people all knew how to do this because they all talked like this in the era Donald Duck was from.

Here is Ko-Fi again. If there's something you'd like to see me post or unearth in atonement, let me know. If you'd like other places to aim your dead green American presidents, I can give you that too.

Thanks for reading and/or reblogging! Tell me how Donald Duck's freakouts impacted you. Take care of yourselves!

Rent is $710/month, so 1420 is January and February.

65 for the internet, 130

65 for car insurance, 130

65 for electric unless I can get the assistance plan up again, same 130

250 to survive at the con maybe?

Also just like food until i can get the foodstamps stuff sorted??

Gas???

Anyway, that's an idea of what and why, if that is helpful.

Jan 8:

We are at $460!

Thanks!

[always-is-always]

Post-June 2025...what will we see?

Hmmmm. Okay, so I'll just put this here, and we will either see just how wrong I can be 😁 , or just how spot-on I can be. 😇

With recent developments in the movement of furniture, from Jimin's place to his Dad's cafe', I'm just going to say what is in my mind. We are going to see Jimin moving into that big 5-level home, that Jungkook is building. Yeah.

Don't quote me. And, don't dog me either. lol... this is just my little ramble based on stuff that I sense (there's a ton of that), and simply observing what we have been shown (subtle as some of it is). Yeah.

After they finish this life-changing 18 months of literally living side-by-side, I think that they will not want to separate themselves from one another. Again, that is just my thought/sense, and that's that. lol... I'm not sayin' it is absolutely correct, but I am sayin' that it is absolutely a possibility. 😆 And, being free of their MS requirements actually takes the legalities of being a queer couple out of their future timeline. Meaning, they will no longer have to consider things quite the way they did in 2023, prior to their application to enlist as companions, and after it had been accepted.

After June 12 2025, they will be FREE. Sure, they have the constraints of their culture, the fandom and their industry. But they are also well enough established that they have far more wiggle-room, and they have more power in their personal choices. Honestly, they have enough money between the two of them that they don't have to work another day in their lives, if they chose not to. They are that wealthy. (I think we forget that they work by choice.)

It feels like this time that they have AWAY from the cameras, away from the fandom, away from Big Hit and HYBE, is the biggest gift that they could get. I'm reminded of 2020. I actually feel that the insanity of the 2020 lockdowns and cancellation of their public performances gave them the break they needed, and the time to be together that they needed. If I've really learned anything so far from all the original content I have been watching, it is that the members NEEDED to have their own space to live in, and privacy.

Right now, Jimin and Jungkook are in their military bubble, safe and sound, and exactly where they chose to be as companions. Afterwards, I think that they are planning to be housemates, once discharged.

So, there. I said it. We shall see what comes in 2025....

One more thing. I am not saying that they will come out, as a couple. That is a whole other can of worms. But as I have written before, if they can pull off applying to enlist as companions AND actually enlisting as companions, they CAN pull off being housemates (without putting any label on it publicly).

Another ramble that just kinda happened. Blame my fingers for just doing their thing, and that other thing called, "intuition". Yeah.

2025 is going to be an interesting year. For sure.

[back2bluesidex]

Welcome To My Favorite Place ✨

Hello, this is Nika. Welcome to my masterlist.

Here you will find the byproducts of my sleepless nights and wild imaginations.

Most of my stories are for mature audience. Hence, if you are a minor, you need to stay away from my blog. Some stories may have triggering concepts, please proceed upon reading the warnings carefully.

Hope you have a good reading. 💕

Check out my membership exclusive masterlist for stories that I post only on Patreon.

Themes:

Angst - 💔, Fluff - 💖, Smut - 💋

KNJ

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

None yet.

Oneshots

Next level, space level 💋💔

Summary: How can Namjoon deny you when you are ready to give yourself to him?

2. Forbidden 💋

Summary: You know it's forbidden but you don't care, not when your professor is more than ready to ruin you.

3. Bus Ride 💋💖

Summary: Namjoon has a massive crush on his coworker and it takes all his self control to survive a bus-ride with her.

4. Seven Minutes 💔

Summary: Namjoon goes around the world in a day in just seven minutes.

Drabbles

Idol!Namjoon X Author!Reader (Meet cute)

Lover - (Fluff)

Enchanted - (Angst with happy ending)

KSJ

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

Taste of a Poison [Twoshot] 💔💋

Summary: Relationship with Seokjin is as toxic as it is addictive.

Part 1 , Part 2 [Discontinued]

Oneshots

Wanna be yours 💖💋

Summary: A peaceful, dreamless sleep is all you wanted after a long and boring office party but life has different plans and that plan includes the CEO of your company.

2. 20 Years Late 💔💖

Summary: Seokjin could count on his fingers the things that haven't changed within these 20 years of his life, and one of those is you..

Drabbles

By the Sea - (fluff)

You Belong with Me - (Fluff)

Broken Heart Over Whiskey Glass - (Angst)

Meanie - (Smut)

MYG

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

1. Slide 💔💋

Summary: 

"I can see the pain in your eyes I don't wanna say that I'm God, but I'll take you to heaven if you die"  

Alternatively, 

You would go back in time and fall in love with Yoongi over and over and over again even after knowing that he would never once be yours in any of the timeline.

Oneshots

Call Me Oppa 💋💖

Summary: Yoongi has a weird kink... Maybe you'll find it out soon enough.

2. Haegeum 💋

Summary: Banning Yoongi from your bar has its own consequences.

3. Spotlight 💔💖

Summary: No matter how much you run away from Yoongi, Yoongi always comes right back to you.

4. Give Me A Taste 💋

Summary: Yoongi is down bad for you, he has been missing your taste crazily. Thanks to unexpected turns of events and a cancelled show, he can finally satiate his hunger for you.

5. One of the Girls 💋

Summary: Min Yoongi has been threatening your father. But that's not the problem. The problem is that you wanna get fucked by him.

Drabbles

Best friend!Yoongi X Fem!Reader (Angst)

Delicate - (Implied SMUT, Fluff)

Great War - (Angst)

Girl Crush - (Angst)

JHS

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

I Fell First but He Fell Harder [Series](Completed) 💔💖💋

Summary: You have been with Him since the beginning. To you he was the only person that existed in the world, in your world. But to him, you are another pair of hands that clapped after each of his performance. Will it change when you secure a job in his dancing academy?

2. Broken Glock [Series] (Completed) 💔💖💋

Summary: Hoseok is cold hearted, that's what everyone says. He is made of stone, no emotion runs through his veins, everyone believes it. Everyone but you. Because you have seen concern in his eyes and felt warmth in his touches. You have seen the real him, someone he doesn't acknowledge to be. And that's what has made you fall for him even though you believe you are nothing but a paid employee to him. But the reality is different. You're the only one that makes Hoseok a sane human being, he loves you with all of his heart, so much so that now he has started pushing you away from him to keep you protected from any harm. But will you two survive without each other? What if you can't? And what if you won't?

3. Dear Darling [Mini Series] 💔💋

Summary: After his bride flees from his clutches and reaches the realm of mortals to reunite with her lover - Hoseok has no choice but to chase her. Upon his arrival to the land of obnoxious humans, he crosses paths with you. You are a small, driven mortal who walks with a load of despair on her back. You are nothing but a delicious meal to him and he wants nothing more than to suck your life out of you, find his runaway wife and return to his kingdom. But much to his dismay, you ruin his plans, make him do what he never imagined doing in 600 years of his life - like making him fall in love and keeping him bound to you.

Oneshots

1. Attention 💋

Summary: A very jealous Hoseok fucks you into oblivion.

2. Fleeting [Birthday special] 💔💋

Summary: It's his birthday and you got a surprise for him but maybe not of the good kind.

3. Let's get engaged [Enlistment Special] 💖

Summary: Hoseok is enlisting but he has some pending works to complete beforehand.

4. Not Jealous 💋

Summary: You know Hoseok is sulking and you know how to cheer him up.

5. Cold war 💔💋

Summary: In which Hoseok fucks you for all the time he has lost due to his own mistakes.

6. Soju Bomb 💋

Summary: Hoseok doesn't like soju usually, but he discovers he likes the taste when the drink is spilled on your body.

7. Fool's Gold 💔

Summary: Falling for Jung Hoseok is... Fool's Gold.

8. Not a Dream 💔💖 (Please don't read it. It's my very first fic and it's very cringe! I, myself, don't like it.)

Summary: She thinks she is not good enough for him. She thinks she has nothing to offer. But she doesn't know she is all he wants. But why?

9. Your Lips, My Lips - Apocalypse 💔💋

Summary: You are lonelier than anyone he has ever witnessed. Your loneliness comes with an intensity that matches his, maybe that’s why he is so attracted to you? Maybe that’s why he wants to give you his final moments of existence?

10. Heeled Boots 💋

Summary: A little something about Hoseok's heeled boots from MAMA 2022.

Drabbles

Teardrops - (Angst with an open ending)

Afterglow - (Angst with happy ending) [A Girl Crush followup drabble]

PJM

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

Lightning [Mini-Series] 💋💖

Summary: You don't understand why you find Park Jimin everywhere you go. Also, why his eyes stay only on you.

1.1 Like Crazy - A lightning sequel 💋💖

Summary: Jimin wants to make you his and he will get in done tonight.

2. Oh So Reluctant [Twoshot] 💔💋💖

Summary: For the past eleven months that you have been married to Park Jimin, he has not looked at you the way he has been doing today. And there is sinister in his eyes.

Part 1, Part 2

Oneshots

1. 25 and Virgin 💋

Summary: You are 25 and virgin but maybe your crush slash senior Park Jimin can change that tonight.

Drabbles

Wildest Dreams - (Angst)

Cruel Summer - (Fluff)

KTH

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

None Yet

Oneshots

Baggage 💔

Summary: After six months of parting your ways from each other, Taehyung receives your handwritten letter. An unexpected one.

2. Like a Brother 💋

Summary: Taehyung has always been someone out of your league. Honestly, he isn't even your type. But that doesn't mean you haven't felt weak at times.

Drabbles

Rainy Day [A Baggage Drabble] 💔

Snow on the Beach - (Fluff)

JJK

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

Trouble [Twoshot] 💋

Summary: It's not that you don't like your hot rommmate, you just choose to stay away.

1.1. Trouble 2 💋

Summary: It's not that you don't like your hot rommmate, you just choose to stay away.

2. Novice 💋💖

Summary: The need of some extra money lands on you a weird job. But you are not complaining, not when you get to fuck Jeon Jungkook.

2.1. We Need Practice 💋💖

Summary: Jungkook wants you to ride him and you are too bad at that.

Oneshots

1. Desire 💋

Summary: Jungkook hates you, you hate Jungkook but sometimes desire is more important than hatred.

2. Monitoring Duty 💖

Summary: You are tasked with monitoring Jungkook's weverse live tonight, which starts with you trying to shove ramyeon down your throat and ends with Jungkook confessing that he likes you too.

3. Seven Days a Week 💋

Summary: Jungkook promised himself that he will be fucking you right seven days a week.

4. Bad Idea 💋

Summary: Accepting Jungkook's invitation to watch him train topless was such a bad idea.

5. In Motion 💋

Summary: You are finally letting Jungkook set everything in motion. And he is more than happy to show you what he has to offer.

6. Standing Next to You 💋💔💖

Summary: Your and Jungkook's relationship is all about dark rooms, shadows, rendezvous and secrecy. It pains you to even think that you can't claim him as yours in front of the world. But Jungkook is always there to set your fears free because he loves you even more than you love him.

7. Closer To You 💔💋

Summary: You know that you and Jeongguk are completely different individuals from every possible aspect, and there is no future of this relationship but you can’t push him away, not when he only wants to come closer to you.

8. Darling, can I be your favorite? 💋

Summary: Your close friend bagged a hot boyfriend. And that said boyfriend is more interested in you than her.

9. Gin and Tonic (ft. Kim Mingyu) 💋

Summary: If Jungkook is pungent as Gin then you need Mingyu as Tonic water to soothe your throat.

Drabbles

Idol!Jungkook X Reader (Establish relationship, fluff)

The Way I Loved You - (Angst with happy ending)

Gorgeous - (SMUT)

Tolerate it - (Angst)

Return the Favor - (SMUT)

Fortnight - (Fluff)

OT7/Multiple Members

Series/Drabble-series/Twoshots

Where Do Broken Hearts Go? - ft. JJK & JHS 💔💋💖 [Series] (completed)

Summary: Jungkook stripped your emotions naked, left you bare in the chilly wind of despair and self-doubt with an unending heartache. You tried your hardest to move on from him, to live for yourself but failed miserably. Each night you had to come back to your empty home where memories and broken dreams were scattered all around the floor, until one day a little angel and her unbelievably beautiful father came into your life. Finally, when you find yourself healing, maybe falling too, Jungkook had to show up! Again!

2. Hard Luck - ft. JJK & KTH 💖💋 [Series]

Summary: You have a good face, a nice body, a fat amount saved in your secondary bank account, a stable job that you love, loving friends and family, you are good in bed. You have almost everything other than a good luck in love. Sleeping around with random dudes don’t feel enough when your friends are getting married and having kids. If you are being honest, you have started getting bored of this prolonged singlehood already.  Your last light of hope fades away when your work crush, aka the hot guy from the legal department, Kim Taehyung (with whom you might or might not have slept once, okay! twice!), asks you to set him up with your work best friend (who, apparently, is the most asked out woman of the company). But what you don’t know is that the CEO of the company has taken a liking to you and has set out on a mission of winning your heart.  But wait… Taehyung might have started developing feelings for you in the process of receiving your help!!!

Oneshots

1. Best Fucking Friends - JHS & PJM 💋

Summary: Guess, your dumbass ex-boyfriend did the right thing for once by dumping you. Your best friends are more than happy to fuck you into oblivion.

2. The More, The Merrier- KTH & JJK 💋

Summary: Taehyung should definitely feel angry or at least disappointed seeing you already trying to sleep with someone else, that too, his best friend. However, what he feels is insanely turned on.

Drabbles

Happily Ever After - KNJ & JHS (Angst)

*Disclaimer: All the pictures are taken from internet and pinterest (ktvjeon). I don't own the edits.

[turtlesandfrogs]

So, here's the problem: the longer I work in gardening and landscaping, the more I care about the ecological impacts of native plants, and the less I care about aesthetics. Which is a problem, when most clients' primary concern is that their yard looks nice. Which, fair, I just don't care as much about it as they do and I feel like I could be making a bigger impact than I currently am.

So I'm thinking of quitting this job and going one of two entirely different directions, and for some reason it's rather hard to choose.

Option A is starting my own native plant nursery, which would focus on small (4 inch and gallon pot sized) native plants, with a focus on plants that are most important for native pollinators (especially those that are endangered or threatened where I am). There's some competition, but mostly at selling-to-landscapers level and not retail, and I'd want to focus on retail sales.

Option B is to get a job with the state doing some kind of ecological restoration work. The problem with that is my bachelor's degree is over a decade old and I don't actually have the kind of experience to put on my resume that would likely convince them that I can do the work (unless a combination of teaching and being self-employed as a gardener that helps people incorporate native plants and removes invasive species counts, which maybe?). So I'd probably have to take a lower level job and one that's further away to get in, and then work my way up.

Option A has the upsides of: completely setting my own schedule, getting to work with plants most of the time, getting to work with my partner, flexibility to decide I want to start teaching classes again or something. It has the down sides of having to do taxes multiple times per year, and not being guaranteed to work, and either needing to take out a business loan to get started or work at a day job to fund starting it up. Also if it fails I'll have to get another job without have professional references again, which yikes.

Option B has the upside of once you're in state work, it's way easier to get other state jobs so if I burn out of one job, I can hop to another relatively easily, will almost certainly make more money, comes with health insurance and retirement savings, and is likely the more stable option. On the down side, it would mean working 40 hours a week without getting to pick my schedule and it would be harder to take time off than it is now, I'll have to work my way up to a comfortable salary, and there's a lot less autonomy than when self employed. But I'll also have professional references out the wazoo, so finding new jobs should be easier?

One of the things that concerns me is I have ADHD and up until teaching, the longest I ever stayed in one job was almost 2 years. I taught for 4 years, then was self-employed as a gardener for 4 years, and now I've worked for this landscaping company for just over a year (and am grumpy about a) not making much money and b) aesthetics and only providing services to people who can afford us, rather than say, improving the environment for everyone). So I'm actually kinda afraid that if I started the native plant nursery, I would get sick of it after less than 5 years and be starting from scratch again. Whereas with a state job, I can pop over to a new job fairly easily. On the other hand, maybe I'm just doubting myself too much because all of those other jobs were actually really bad matches for me.

Anyway, my brain is going in circles over this. I mean, really, part of me thinks I should stay at this job even though it doesn't pay much compared to what I could make elsewhere (I have learned a lot though, which can be transfered to other jobs) just because it's so low stress compared to any other job I've had in the last decade & because the people are great and the work isn't bad. It just galls me that occasionally clients have ideas that I strongly disagree with, like cutting down a very nice magnolia tree because "it's too big" and I just have to do it because I'm an employee now. Ugh.

[greenerteacups]

Fair warning: I don't think this is going to be a question, just a few post-latest chapter thoughts haphazardly stacked together under a trenchcoat.

Thank you for this chapter. It made my day to read something almost fluffy (I don't think anything in LH can be called purely fluff, and that's a good thing because fluff is best when it is padding for the plot, and that's what this chapter was).

LH Book 5 has been the beginning of payoff for the Dramione slow burn, and while that is immensely satisfying, it also means there are less milestones to look forward to. I don't know if this was an intentional decision, but I love how you started seeding in another slow burn that has kept us equally invested: the Black family drama.

I love reading anything that does the dysfunctional family dynamic well, and seeing Draco getting old enough to identify it clearly, have questions, testing his boundaries, fighting back against what he's been told to accept, has all been immensely satisfying as someone who has gone through this myself. Your depiction of the Black family dynamics has been /chef's kiss/. * spoiler for chapter 70 * when Draco witnesses his cousins casually throwing information his way, what I wanted was for one of the adults to see how much he needed that information, that connection, and give it to him. My god ❤️ You have written a lonely boy craving family so well.

Back to the Dramione of it all (and this might be a question), I love how Harry chose to approach the contained chaos waiting to unravel around him and just bluntly told Draco what he did. Question: do you think this is something Canon Harry would have done in this instance? Was there a choice to change anything in your characterisation of Harry (with respect to Canon) that resulted in this wonderful, blunt, more-mature-than-many-adults-who-can't-even-identify-their-needs version of Harry?

If not, what canon Harry actions/traits do you think would point to him acting this way?

Thank you! This is a beautiful and very kind trench coat, and I am luxuriating in it.

I will answer your question while continuing to luxuriate: I don't think canon Harry would ever confront his friends about an emotional problem, mostly because because he never does. Hermione and Ron, the two people he's most comfortable with in the world, are feuding for most of HBP, and while he does have a few "can't you guys just get along?" type-outbursts, he doesn't really sit down and ask "hey, what's going on with you? How can I help?" because canon!Harry is, as you might expect for a 15-year-old boy, better at ignoring his problems than solving them. (I also think there's an ingredient of conflict-avoidance in there from his upbringing with the Dursleys, but I'll be the first to admit that's mostly headcanon.)

My Harry is a bit softer — in part because that's just how I prefer my Harry, my favorite scenes with him are those where he's showing tenderness for things other people have neglected. This is the best of him, and this is the core of him, in my opinion. Canon Harry has this marvelous capacity for empathy, and when he chooses to use it, it's kind of astonishing how capable he is of resisting prejudice and caring for people. He's fiercely loyal in defending Hagrid, always. He makes a point of freeing Dobby, who's just spent a book trying to maim him. He refuses to let Sirius kill Pettigrew, even knowing that Pettigrew betrayed his parents ("My dad wouldn't want you to" — sweet boy, you mean you don't want them to, and you understand on some level that's the only thing you can say that will stop them.) He saves Gabrielle Delacour, because even if she would have been safe in the end, he's not leaving a little girl at the bottom of a fucking lake. He reads the Half-Blood Prince's handwriting — Snape's handwriting — and thinks: "I bet he's someone like me." On the basis of handwriting, he empathizes with this person! Harry is constantly trying to save people, and he doesn't ever really tell us why. And we'll never know why canon!Harry does that, consciously or subconsciously, but I have to imagine that every time Harry looks at someone in pain, he sees a lonely kid stuck under a staircase, and he thinks not fucking today.

[normal-paldean-student]

Muse Mixup Madness—March 1, 2024

(If you don't know what this is, see this post)

welcome back to the second round of muse mixup madness! the first time around went great, and i'm hoping to see people have just as much fun with this one!

starting this month, i'm going to begin marking prompts as high or low fantasy. low fantasy prompts should be compatible with any blog canon, while high fantasy ones might inherently involve things that more grounded blogs might prefer to avoid, like eebydeebies, sapient pokémon, hybrids, or crossovers. there will always be at least one low fantasy prompt.

(note! these labels are completely arbitrary, and there are no rules in muse mixup madness. if you're a low fantasy blog and some interpretation of a high fantasy prompt appeals to you, go for it.)

with that out of the way, let's get into this month's prompts!

1. The Road Not Taken (low fantasy)

Everyone has had decisions to make in life, some of them more impactful than others. With this prompt, you'll be looking into what may have happened if your muse chose to pursue a different path in life from the one they did.

2. Rags to Riches/Riches to Rags (low fantasy)

A character's socioeconomic status growing up has a huge impact on how they interact with the world and the person they become. If your character's family was richer or poorer, how would that affect them?

3. Another World (high fantasy)

If your character was a Faller originating from somewhere other than the Pokémon multiverse, where would they be from? What would they be like? If your character is already a Faller, explore who they'd be if they'd been a Pokémon character from the beginning.

(For a lower fantasy take on this one, you can remove the crossover element and focus on the effects of being or not being a more canon-compliant Faller.)

4. I've Got a Type (high-ish fantasy)

Does anyone else remember typed humans? They were a minor character trend around a year ago before they died out, and now with hybrids around they've been more or less forgotten. I liked them though, so this prompt is for an AU where your character is one of them! If they already have a type due to being a Pokémon or hybrid, give them something unconventional for their species instead.

5. Bonded Rivals (high fantasy, requires partner)

Maybe it's coincidence that your character and your partner's keep meeting, or maybe it's fate pulling them to each other with some sort of invisible (or visible) tether. But whatever the reason, and whatever the level of supernatural involvement, every time they see each other there's some level of fighting or competition involved. After a point, they do have to have built up a mutual respect through that... right?

(Or in other words, this one's a soulmate AU, but for rivalry instead of romance. You can sprinkle in any trappings of that you like, or keep it wholly mundane for a more low-fantasy take if you prefer.)

a little note on that last one—it's entirely possible it appeals to you, but you don't have anyone to do it with. if that's the case, you can make an open invitation post on your blog or use the notes of this post to coordinate.

and once again, for my records, please answer the poll! again, it's not binding, this is just so i can gauge popularity for the prompts.

(also, please reblog this post when you see it instead of just scheduling it for day of so more people have a chance to see it while there's still time to prepare)

[rubixpsyche]

I don't wanna step on any toes so know that this is absolutely inspired by @redladydeath 's RAM AU, but now I'm thinking of an AU where Vox sabotages his own memories of Alastor because 5 years into Alastor's disappearance he's getting frustrated that he just can't move on. He doesn't care about Alastor anymore, he was stupid to reject him his proposal, why is he still so hung up on some has-been who people are suspecting is dead now, he's not even a threat he's gone.

Maybe he's careful, or maybe emotionally he gets careless and deletes too much too quickly, I haven't figured out which I want yet.

Cos being careful means Vox going through their memories, turning them over and having to really re-experience and consider if there's any crucial knowledge/information he needs from it before he throws it out. Which forces him to keep reliving them and strengthening his attachment which is so counterproductive to this whole plan. And the more he keeps the more he looks like the lovesick reject and he hates that. And for USEFUL experiences, he's pissed because he cannot stand the idea that Alastor made him. He doesn't want a hint of that notion. He is Vox, he is self-made, Alastor was just another person he used on the way up to the top. He didn't need Alastor to get to where he is. Did he.

On the other hand if he erratically deletes memories on impulse, then people, especially the Vees, notice him change suddenly. Mannerisms he unknowingly picked up from Alastor disappear and they are made aware of how much of Vox came from Alastor, stuff he probably didn't even know himself and would have never told others. It bugs Valentino especially, because there was an overlap between when he met Vox and Vox was still hanging out with Alastor. And the amount of influence Alastor has is starting to bug him, because there's no way for him to know if he has the same level of influence (he's jealous). He's part of the Vees, he and Vox started that. Surely he has equal or even more influence on Vox even if he knew him for a shorter time. He is Valentino, he changed Vox's life, like how Vox changed his. For Velvette it's just an unwelcome change, and is a little wary of it changing up their dynamic too much. Was the procedure so destructive that it could topple their empire? Because if that's how this ends she's going to be so fucking mad that he did this to himself and more importantly, them. Impulsively. Without even considering what it would do to the Vees. Isn't he supposed to be the planner?!

Vox will also have to struggle with missing memories he actually really fucking needed and it frustrates em knowing he did that to himself.

Idk I just really wanna explore that dilemma we have after a breakup, platonic or romantic, of wanting to forget everything about them. About how this could harm you because unfortunately sometimes your lives were intertwined so tightly. But also you can own what you got from them, and you shouldn't cut out parts of yourself for them. And you always have more people that will influence you, and you're robbing yourself of something by being so hurt by the past that you won't let others influence you ever again. That's not a bad thing.

Also I want to make it a tech thing >:) I'll expand on that next time

Chromedome fans rise up

[maybe-boys-do-love]

The Trainee, Episode 7 Work-Life

So i wanted to dive into episode 7 of the Trainee before watching the new one, because, after some thought, i realized how it gives an extraordinary culmination of all the shows' themes around healthy workplaces for which its been subtly laying the building blocks. Re-watching it, I marked over 30 references to well-being in workplaces in the episode. I'll pare it down for y'all. Spoilers ahead. Here we go, hold on tight!

1.Ba Mhee reminds Tae to take his vitamins as they car-pool into the office. He is, of course, ignoring her as he works and edits away on his computer beneath a blanket to keep the glare out from his screen. She tells him he needs to take care of his body. "You use your body a lot!" And this emphasis on bodily health that we get from Ba Mhee is key to understanding the show's complex perspective on work-life balance and the comparison we get (and will likely continue to get) between Judy and Jane's relationships with their interns.

2.In the next scene, Pah finishes up a voice-over for the post-production team and declares, "Feel free to ask me to do anything," which includes buying food, buying snacks, and carrying stuff. He's "always ready to help." Wan, the editor, doesn't discourage his boundary-less enthusiasm.

gif by @peachblossomdrama

3.And why would we be surprised by Wan's answer to Pah? We next see him explaining how he hasn't slept for 24 hours and another editor waking up after a night spent sleeping in the office. The editing team is a great example of how the show has used comedy--these goofy nerds who seem clueless to social cues like when and where its appropriate to sleep and how to socialize to have friends and partners--to plant the reality of major work-life balance issues in this office. But something the show uses to complicate a straight-up condemnation of their work behavior is that it let's us know that it's very much is the nature of the post-production team's job to have the strictest deadlines, requiring them to work weird, intense hours. They explain to Tae the Monday deadline, which will require him to work over the weekend unless he can finish it by Monday. Putting so much on the intern, however, seems sketch, to say the least. And focus on work over his personal life is what leads Ba Mhee to start doubting their relationship, which doesn't end well...

4.Another moment of comedy that also shows us the blurred lines between office and home life is Pie and Ba Mhee's conversation about Judy in the bathroom as Pie brushes her teeth and Ba Mhee puts her make up. It's a little moment, but little moments like this that emphasize the bigger message are what make this show so fuckin great.

5.There are lots of little moments about hunger and food in this episode and throughout the series. Ba Mhee's sandwich for Tae, Jane checking on Ryan's hunger level--being fed takes care of a body to make sure they are prepared and focus to do their work, and these moments remind us of its importance.

6.But Judy's sharing of her food with Ba Mhee begins a series of questions about sharing with coworkers, and especially with suborinate employees. It goes from sharing food, to confusing the glasses of water, to sharing a kiss, symbolizing the blurring of the lines between their own personal boundaries.

7.I won't excuse Judy's behavior, however, the show does a beautiful job of contextualizing it within Judy's workaholic nature in which she never seems to be off-duty. She's called Ba Mhee at 2am previously and we've seen her as the last person in the office. In this episode, she zoom's in while she can't actually be on video, she delivers a gift to clients several years after last working with them, and then she's out late partying with the clients. Everything she says in this episode suggests a marriage to her work where she seeks others' approval, and that prevents her from truly taking care of herself or having a clear head about her personal life and boundaries.

8.The parties and drinking are another question about professional behavior the show brings up. When Ba Mhee explains, "You're clients got me drunk," we are cued into the power imbalance at play even if the show hides its hand by not emphasizing it. In fact, we are pointed to the inappropriateness of this client a few times throughout the episode. The boss, for example, chooses who to work with based on "physiognomy," or looks... Of course, as with the post-production team, networking and parties and attractiveness are a reality for this position, so we aren't meant to be mad about a hard line being crossed (except the kiss), but bare witness to the fuzziness of the boundary and Judy's failure to identify it for herself and/or support Ba Mhee in finding it.

9.There's one more work boundary Judy crosses that, while I'm sure when other people notice its inclusion will feel perturbed, I found touching in connecting it to the confusion of separating one's work self and personal self. Judy discloses her sexuality. Nowadays, this is less fraught (depending on ur locale, of course!), but it is still legal to discriminate in workplaces based on your sexuality in many places. It's not a given that you get to express every part of yourself professionally, and the question of how much you can say or express your sexuality while working with the public and with coworkers is another occupational ethics question, and I'm so glad that the show included it in the tangled mess of Judy's boundary-crossing instead of simply showing us the "right way" to do it only, because, it's really not that long since there was no 'right way' in a legal and public opinion sense.

10.Speaking of sexuality, let's talk about the character of Joy, who is so lusciously funny with her open attraction to Jane that we go into our comedy mindsets and ignore how wildly inappropriate she's acting. Ryan is right, "This is an abuse of a professional position" and "If you want to flirt with each other, do it somewhere else, not in the office." Her inappropriate behavior has real consequences. She favors Jane and gives him the bottles instead of the actual director, which is the start of the issues, because there is a trend throughout the series that Jane doesn't actually know where a lot of things are at the office. Then, her behavior, not Ryan's crush alone, causes Ryan's challenges with focusing, so he's wasting paper (while wearing a recycling shirt!) and not listening when the explanation is given about the tester for the collagen capsule. Why isn't anyone intervening? Because of our acculturation to workplace comedy behavior, we're allowed to see it all as humorous, but the show has more up its sleeve.

11.Consequences is one of the things that The Trainee does exceptionally well. It gives us comedic elements but doesn't let them flit away as a joke. There are financial, emotional, and this time, physical ramifications to what could otherwise be laughed off. Jane doesn't pick up the phone. Ryan missed the information because of Joy's flirting and his own feelings, so he gives Pah the wrong bottle. When Pah leaves work, the show includes the detail of the burns on his arms, which is just such a great little detail, because consequences at work is what the show's all about: consequences and how to move forward once they occur.

12.JANE AND RYAN'S FIGHT!!!! They're both right and they're both wrong and it's so real and honest about what arguments actually are. First, Jane is ever professional by having the conversation privately after the explosion ("Go wait for me in my office"), because you don't shame employees in front of others. Next, Ryan owns his behavior and apologizes but also--and this is by far Ryan's biggest strength--articulates some of his questions and observations about the causes, explaining how he tried to call Jane for the info. Jane shoots back asking if there was no one else Ryan could ask, pointing to two issues for the two of them we can interpret. One: Jane knows Ryan has, if nothing else, latched onto him at work for assistance over anyone else. Two: Ryan couldn't have talked to anyone else because the office has an organization and documentation issue, sono one knows where anything is, especially if they weren't individually in charge of it. Just earlier in the episode Jo was looking through files on the desk for a document Prang sent, and Jane couldn't help locate it, either. I'd have to rewatch, but I'd guess in nearly every episode there's something lost that someone's looking for. Idk if Jane is being defensive about a known weak point of his, or if he just doesn't realize it.

13. Ryan discloses his feelings for Jane! For all the internal monologues and cues we've seen about Ryan's feelings (and about Jane's likely reciprocation), he hasn't been unprofessional. Disclosing his feelings verbally to his superior is actually a professional choice (the edits do all the heavy lifting of the romantic elements). Remember what Ba Mhee said at the beginning of the episode. "You're body is important." Communicating a feeling verbally is very different than using his body to communicate as Judy does. And the awareness and choices we make to deal with the feelings matter deeply in a professional setting, and both Jane and Ryan seem appropriately aware of this. We'll see what next steps they take now.

[dr-spectre]

Guess what game I just finished!!!

I dont have a lot to say on this because I think over the past 20 years people have already said enough.

But... MY GOD! The level of variety, creativity, and fresh ideas each chapter brings holy SHITTTT!!! One moment you're going underground with a cute goomba girl, then you're fighting a dragon, then you're playing a World 1-1 recreation with BOWSER! Then you're playing as Peach who has this deeply emotional and sad relationship with an AI (Tec is the goat, I love that ai. Top 10 ai in fiction idc), then you're doing a tournament arc AND THEN YOU'RE DOING A TRAIN MYSTERY OH MY GOODNESS!!!!

The combat is really fun and charming, THE DIALOGUE IS SO WELL WRITTEN AND I LAUGHED MULTIPLEEEEE TIMES!!! I love the characters, I love the world, I love the art style, i love most of the boss fights, the music is banging (I played with the original ost), God there's so much to love.

I will say, the final chapter of this game did kinda drag on, and there's so many points where I was thinking "okay NOW I get to fight the final boss!" And it takes another hour to get to them.... there's so many obvious signs of padding (copy and pasted hallways, a trash "pick the right door" puzzle, etc.)

I also didn't like how when you swapped partners that counts as a turn, i feel like you should be able to swap without wasting a turn because it would help with the flow of combat and make using Goombella's tattle less of a fucking pain...

Also....

VIVIAN IS SO FUCKING CUTE!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!! SHE'S MY FAVOURITE PARTNER BY FARRRRR!!!!! Goombella is really cute too and she has amazing dialogue. I love the storyline of Admiral Bobbery too and that stuff made me cry... but...EEEEE I LOVE VIVIAN!!!!

GOD I JUST WANNA HUG HER!!! I WANNA PINCH HER CHUBBY CHEEKS!!! I WANNA RUB HER BELLY!!!! Nintendo I need a plushie of her yesterday. Come on. Please... I need one...

I shall leave my partner rankings as well, i wonder if I got any hot takes or not...

6. Flurrie.

No. Just... no I don't like her. Her design creeps me out, I don't give a shit about her moves. I never used her. Get her away from me.

5. Goombella.

Although very cute I found her more of a hindrance and i kept going, "ugh I gotta swap to her to get the tattle..." At least her design and personality are cute. Plus, she's more useful than that creepy ass Flurrie....

4. Koops.

I like him! He helped me out a LOTTT in the final battle, his later moves that you can unlock make him pretty damn good. Although I am jealous that this wimp has a girlfriend....

3. Admiral Bobbey.

Honestly I think the reason why he might be this high is because of his story. I really felt bad for him... his design is also killer, I LOVEEEE Bob-ombs so much!

2. Mini-Yoshi.

The fact that you can name him is really funny to me idk why. He's got some very helpful moves and his ability to help you move faster in the overworld is really nice. I like how he calls you Gonzalez too. What a fun character man.

1. Vivian.

I already said why I like her earlier but I'll go on further.

I LOVE HER STORYLINE TOO!!! I LOVE HER DESIGN!!! I LOVE HOW SHE'S TRANS AND THE REMAKE DIDN'T GET RID OF IT LIKE HOW THE ORIGINAL NORTH AMERICAN AND EUROPEAN RELEASES OF THE GAMECUBE VERSION GOT RID OF IT!!!

God.... I love her. I wanna kiss her on the cheek. She's so cute. Her moveset too is fire!.... wait..

Also btw I didn't know that this RATTTT was an optional party member... oops...

[hell-drabbles]

Mock-up Card 1

Basically it's just an L Card with the Embittered Companion and Lucifer working together because my brain is stuck on that for some reason? It's weird. Anyways, when you activate the Ultimate Skill of this card, you switch to either Lucifer or the Embittered Companion. A sort of, two-in-one card. Embittered Companion is all about dealing damage while Lucifer is all about healing. There's a boost to their ATK for a good while after switching. Don't ask about the numbers, I didn't think of them at aaaall.

Also I don't have it in me to write prose right now, so here be lines!!!

[First Encounter]

YOU: Hey. It's been how many years? You know, since I last took up a weapon to chase people away? It's pretty nostalgic, honestly. LUCIFER: …are you already forgetting what you promised us? YOU: I'm not gonna charge in head first, you two. Get off my ass.

[Level Up]

YOU: What I lack… LUCIFER: I'll make up.

[Evolve]

YOU: It would be nice, to have less lives lost. LUCIFER: But all we can do is continue on, until the very end.

[Ultimate Skill 1]

YOU: Go ahead and take a nap, Lucifer.

[Ultimate Skill 2]

LUCIFER: Sit. Rest. You're bleeding.

[Upon Death]

YOU: I'm still shit at keeping promises huh? LUCIFER: It's not your fault. Let's go.

[Victory 1]

YOU: Glad to see you've been focusing on the task at hand, Ra-on. Well, battle's over, so you can do whatever the hell you want.

[Victory 2]

LUCIFER: This is something to celebrate about, isn't it? …yes, you'll be invited to the party.

[Defeat]

LUCIFER: A mortal body such as their's does not deserve to have injuries like this. Keep quiet, they'll wake up. I know they will.

[Lobby Interaction 1]

YOU: It's kind of funny to me that, after all that, my normal body hasn't really changed one bit. Still the same strength, still the same weaknesses. LUCIFER: It doesn't make it any less remarkable to me. YOU: So you and Ra-on say. Well, I've been in this body longer than anyone, so I wouldn't know what to be impressed by. Everything about this body is just uninteresting to me. Doesn't make me any less happy that I'm back in it, though.

[Lobby Interaction 2]

YOU: Hmm? What are you staring at us for, Ra-on? We that good of a sight? …happy, huh? Yeah, I suppose Lucifer and I make each other pretty happy. Don't discount yourself though, buddy. Wouldn't be in the place that I am without your help.

[Lobby Interaction 3]

LUCIFER: Your hands. Let me see them. YOU: Huh? Alright, but why? LUCIFER: Ra-on told me you forgot about your blisters. YOU: Oh. Oh! No, yeah I did forget. Whoops. But hey, at least I'm wearing gloves this time around, so they're not that bad. None of them popped, so they should heal nicely.

[Lobby Interaction 4]

LUCIFER: If you wanted to destroy Heaven, would you? I wouldn't blame you if you answered 'yes.' YOU: …maybe a younger, more freshly wounded version of myself would've said yes, but as I am now, no. The fate of Heaven is not mine to control. I can only control the distance between me and that place. Besides, I'll hold onto hope that the angels will eventually weed out that sickening need to be superior.

[Lobby Interaction 5]

LUCIFER: Shh. They haven't rested well last night. Whatever it is you want to ask, save it for later. Hmm? Mm. Yes, they're… still haunted by everything. Not even in sleep can they be allowed to escape. A curse that not even my powers can relieve.

[Lobby Interaction 6]

YOU: You know, I haven't heard the name Solomon in a while. Did you finally put your foot while I was away, Ra-on?

[Lobby Interaction 7]

YOU: Another angel almost snatched me up today. Even in this human form they hate so much, they still want to whisk me up right back to that suffocating cradle. Thanks for the warning by the way. LUCIFER: While we were all once siblings connected through our love for God, I won't allow them to repeat that torture. If I must make my words absolute, then I will.

[Lobby Interaction 8]

LUCIFER: Have you adjusted yet? YOU: To what? LUCIFER: To your lack of extra limbs. To that body of yours. Is there any pain? Any noises that want to invade your eyes and ears? YOU: …There's nothing. Sometimes I'll feel like I'm missing something, but it's all blissfully silent.

[Lobby Interaction 9]

LUCIFER: Do you have no intention of staying here? YOU: I have no intention of ever forgetting you, Lucifer. But, I can't stay here. This is not my home. Our home, is right where Minhyeok is. Where our beloved earth is. Hell is nice, but I'm pretty sure Ra-on and I miss the comfort of our home's air.

[Lobby Interaction 10]

YOU: Lucifer? LUCIFER: Yes? YOU: If, one day, I decide to visit, would you welcome me? LUCIFER: …always. A small visit, or a promise to dedicate our existences to one another, I'll welcome it all the same.

[lady-severus-snape]

Random headcannon #987

Severus is a feminist and a champion to one he decides to love.

In the U.S. alone close to an estimated 6 million women suffer from PCOS (myself included) , this does not include those that have not been diagnosed.

****************************

Severus would absolutely be appalled and down right foaming at the mouth when he finds his woman curled up on the bathroom floor crying from pain.

Severus (Concerned, bends down to help you): Darling, what is the matter? Are you hurt? Talk to me?

Y/N (whimpering and writhing in pain): yea, I'm OK. A cyst probably burst. I already took the maximum dose of acetaminophen for today. So hopefully it will take the edge off.

Severus (worried about you): what? What do you mean a cyst has ruptured?! Where?! Max dosage? Woman, that's about 2000mg!

Y/N (grunts and pants through the wave of pain): An ovarian cyst probably burst, and/or I'm having severe menstrual cramps. Yea, short of prescription pain killers, that's what I have on hand. Don't worry I made sure to eat so it doesn't fuck me up more.

Severus could only listen in horror. His woman looked and sounded like she was dying, and all she explained was that a cyst, an ovarian cyst at that exploded internally, and she said was it's was ok?!

Severus: Lovey, we need to get you to the hospital. (Helps Y/N into the room)

Y/N: no, that's OK. They won't do anything. The most they will do is maybe a scan, blood work, and maybe ibuprofen before sending me home with instructions to rest, use a heating pad, and more Tylenol. It's not worth the cost of the visit. I'll fine Sev, honest. Not the first time it's happened and won't be the last.

Severus (mouth dropped open, aghast): what?! What. Do. You. Mean. They. Won't. Do. Anything. You're literally agonizing in pain. They have to do something, they just can't dismiss your problems. It's happened before? When? Why? How?

Y/N (Climbs into bed and curls up): Severus, baby, I hate to break it to you, the medical community don't give a shit about us women. I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS. There is no cure and only like 4-5 medicinal options to manage the symptoms. It took me nearly 20 years to recieve a diagnosis. Dr's called me crazy, depressed, hallucinating, that everything was normal.

Severus felt white hot anger course through his veins. His Y/N was in clear pain, distress, and who knows what else. The muggle doctors failed to help his love.

Severus asked y/n many questions in regards to it until he saw she was nodding off to sleep, the pain finally retracting enough. His mind was already running with possible potion ideas. He needed more information. He walked over to the small library y/n had built over time and pulled every book she had on PCOS. By the 3rd book it was obvious to him, that the information was repeating/recycling itself:

-hormonal problem -uncontrollable weight gain -excess body and facial hair(all the depilatory supplies made more sense) -female patterned hair loss(it explained why she always wore her hair up and always with a hat or scarf) -depression -super heavy and painful menstrual cycles or lack of one -cysts developing not just internally but also outwardly -infertility -high insulin levels

Treatments: hormone contraceptives, metformin or other type 2 diabetic medications, spironolactone or other hair growth inhibiting medications, losing weight, and excersize.

Severus peaked into the bedroom when he heard y/n whimper in her sleep. Another cramp of pain was hitting. His grip on the book tightened until it started to smoke and smolder from his magic, acting to his emotions. Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he weighed his options. He would have to delve into extensive research. What good was his potions mastery if he didn't utilize it. The rest of the weekend was spent with him taking care of y/n through what seemed to him a very hard and agonizing menstrual cycle.

^food in bed ^long soaks in the bathtub with his own personal muscle relaxant ^snacks and chocolate galore ^pampering of every kind you could think of

Once y/n was right as rain, Severus consumed research like a man possessed. Muggle medical reports, studies, and pharmaceuticals. Hell, he even researched for it in the magical world. Boy, was he sorely disappointed. If he thought muggle medicine was lack luster in regards to PCOS, then the magical community was left in the dust! Nothing, zip, zero, nada was found in correlation to PCOS. There is nothing to even address the barest of symptoms! Severus had never been so....so......so......horrified! Armed with rage, spitefulness, and indignation on behalf of y/n, Severus plunges into the world of the unknown for PCOS. Experimental potions safe for muggle use, others for the witches. Thankfully, he has some basis from when he modified the wolfsbane potion. As his research progressed, he discovered that the magical birth rates were low due to not only the inbreeding for blood purity, but in actuality, PCOS was also common amongst the magical woman folk. This led him down another rabbit hole that played on genetics.

After many failed results, Severus managed to find the right combination for y/n. It wasn't a cure by any means of the imagination, but it was far cry from the plebian options offered. His elixir, taken consistently, would lower the excess androgen levels and keep the cortisol level low. It worked better than the aforementioned muggle drugs. He still had problems finding a solution to the whole ovulating problem without causing severe side effects worse than the muggle drugs, but by the gods, he was working on it. Y/N's hair was already growing back fuller, thicker, healthier. Even the beard and mustache she let herself grow out for the sake of research (and laziness. Why should she worry about her beard if it didn't bother Severus. If anything, he was slightly jelly at how glorious hers was; it wasn't fair) had begun to thin out, practically patchy in some spots. But most importantly, to Severus, seeing the how y/n flourished, the femininity of her unrestrained from the dismorphia caused by PCOS. Free from the debilitating pain and suffering. It was breath taking, it made everything he had done worth it to see his love and hopefully the rest of the women population heard and seen.

[outsideratheart]

Adios Amor (Alexia Putellas x reader)

A/N: I'm back baby! This fic was inspired by a line in a movie I watched recently. I hope you guys like it.

UEFA's end of season gala is one of the most prestigious nights in football. No awards were given and ego's were left at the door. The large ballroom is filled with circular tables each hosting different teams from across the world, both men's and women's alike.

It a night to celebrate the sport and to catch with with people who for most of the year are considered the enemy. It is how you found yourself staring across the room at the woman who crossed you path many years ago. It was a night you will remember for many different reasons.

"Why is Y/N Y/L/N staring at you?" Aitana asks Alexia who not so subtly looks your way.

When you lock eyes you raise your class of very expensive champagne. It was a innocent gesture but one that makes Alexia's stomach churn. She shakes her head and hastily turns away. The lack of acknowledgement gains the attention of her fellow Barcelona team mates. The two of you had played against each other a few times at both club and country level but now they think of it, they have never seen you interact with each other than the pre and post game hand shakes.

Then Jenni comes sauntering over and their curiosity only grows.

"Are you going to talk to her or carry on ignoring her like you have been for the past 5 years?" Jenni says fully unaware of the thread she is unravelling.

"I feel like there is a story here" Mapi pushes for more all whilst wondering how in all the years she knew you did she not know you knew each other.

"No story, just history, that's all" Alexia is quick to shut down the conversation given that it took her years to stop thinking about you, or least she had tried to do so.

Alexia's watches in worry as all of her team mates eyes widen and their attention turns to something or rather someone behind her.

“Well, the history is about to become the present because she is coming this way" Jenni quickly downs her drinks knowing that she will need another before you get to them.

You can see 3 Barcelona players looking at you as you make your way towards them and one player is looking anywhere but. Just as you approach them Alexia turns to leave but stops in her tracks when she hears your voice.

"Walking away from me, i'm getting Deja Vu" Although you are joking, it becomes clear that Alexia knows the true meaning of your words.

"Y/N" Alexia says with a low tone.

"Alexia" you say in return.

The energy between you shifts. No words are exchanged but you eyes never leave Alexia's. It is only when she hears Jenni clearing her throat does Alexia break her gaze but yours remains.

"This champagne is amazing" she says in attempt to ease the tension.

"Lefevre Brut" You turn to Jenni when talking to her but by the look at her face she is clearly confused, whether is be by your french accent or something else "The champagne? that is what it's called"

Ale--" you don't get the chance to talk more to your fellow Balon d'or winner as one of Presidents of UEFA calls your name.

"I guess we will see you at the Euros" Aitana tells you only she doesn't quite get the reaction or reply that she expected.

You face drops at the mention of the summer tournament. Alexia expects a clever retort about how Spain won't win if it comes to facing France. The two of you might not have talked for a while but the passion you have when you represent your country is unmatched.

“I'll apologise now for when France beat you, if you get that far" You reply arrogantly hoping that it will cover your delay in response and look on your face which you know you didn't hide very well.

It seems Alexia is the only one who doesn't buy your act. The way you phrased your sentence, how you said France instead of we or even I, it didn't settle well with her.

This time it is her turn to watch you walk away and she couldn't help but enjoy it, she is only human after all.

"Something is wrong with her" Alexia says to no one in particular.

"Why do you care? It's not like you're friends" Mapi is clearly surprised by her friends concern.

"Because Y/N was Alexia's first" Jenni says nonchalantly before taking another sip of her drink.

"She was what?" The blonde defender says in shock.

"That's enough for you. I don't need you telling everyone in this room about my sex life" Alexia takes the champagne from her best friend's glass, downing it herself before putting it on one of the waiter's trays.

"Sex life? So it wasn't just the one time" Aitana joins in.

"We ended up sleeping together more than once over the span of a few years but then I found out she was sleeping with other people.” When she sees her friends about to ask more questions she hold her hand up “It's in the past"

That was the last time your name was mentioned until they watched France play in the first pre Euros friendly and your absence both on the pitch and bench is the hot topic within the Spanish national team. It was during the half time commentary that the world learned the reason why.

"I have spoken with Y/N this morning. She told me that she sustained an injury during the Champions League final against Barcelona which she down played in order to help her team win and she wanted to end the season on a high. She had hoped that rest alone would heal it but unfortunately surgery is required. This is why she is not in the squad today and why she won't be travelling with the team to England for the Euros"

Despite the bad blood Alexia and you shared she couldn't help but feel incredibly sorry for you in this moment. So much so that she wants to reach out to see if you're ok but when she pulls her phone she realises she no longer has your number and messaging you on social media seems too impersonal.

Little did Alexia know she would be joining you on the sidelines after tearing her ACL.

***********************

Alexia was limited in what she could do when she wasn't at rehab so she spent more of her spare time mindlessly scrolling through social media. If asked, she would deny it, but she had been keeping on eye on your accounts and even had a notification on for when you posted. She wanted to know you were ok but the only thing you posted was a photo of you in your hospital bed with the caption 'The cost of victory is high'.

She saw that her sister Alba has posted on her a story which wasn't strange considering the amount fo time the younger Putellas spent on social media. What was interesting is who was in the photo with her. There you stand, your arm wrapped around her sister’s shoulder with the beach as your backdrop.

It wasn't an old photo because it showed Alba's tattoo, one she had only got a few days ago. It caused Alexia to be both confused and intrigued. What were you doing in Barcelona and why out of all people were you with her sister.

Alexia only has one thing on her mind when Alba arrives at her house the next day to take her to therapy. Although she is not sure how to bring you up with it leading to more questions. The fidgeting and constant glances over to the driver’s side of the car doesn't go unnoticed by Alba.

"Ale" she turns her attention to her sister when they get to a red light "What is it?"

The two sisters are close and very open with each other. If one of them has something to say then they will say it making the current situation a little bit concerning.

"What were you doing with Y/N Y/L/N?” Alexia asks. 

“Why do you do that? Say her name like you don’t know her?” When it became clear Alexia won’t answer her question, Alba continues “I bumped into her a few summers ago. She said came to surprise the woman she loved”

This got Alexia’s attention. Whilst Alba knew the two of you were friends, she had no idea just how close the two of your were. You always said your visits to Barcelona were for work, not an international booty call. 

“In the end she never told her. Y/N didn’t want to waste her trip so she starting training here, now she does her solo off season training in Barcelona every year before going back to France”

When the car pulls up to the rehab centre Alexia is out of the car before Alba can say anything else. The midfielder’s mind was running a million miles a second. Part of her couldn’t help but think what if she is the person you came to see. 

When Alexia hears a knock on the door of her physio room your face the last one she expected to see.

"Sorry wrong room" you don't push an interaction with her and chose to walk out before a conversation could be started. 

Alexia wishes in that moment that she could chase after you, she had so many questions for you.

Like she had for the past couple of weeks, Alexia completes her therapy to the best of her ability even though she quickly becomes frustrated at her lack of mobility.

Just as they finish the session, the physio's phone goes off, rightly or wrongly Alexia glances down at the screen. 

Y/N L/Y/N is calling. 

“You can answer it” Alexia says when she notices the therapist declined your call. 

“It’s ok. You’re my patient at the minute” 

Did that mean you were her patient at a different time. 

“Do you know why she is in the city? I thought she would be in France working on her ankle” the Catalonian asks. 

“She did her aggressive rehab here. In France there are too many reminders of what she is missing out on. She, like you, has been struggling with missing out on the euros”

Alexia’s body tenses at the mention of the Euros. The fact that she is missing out of a tournament that she had been preparing for years for, has been hard for her to deal with. 

“I don’t think you should be telling me this?” Alexia knows that the therapist is bound by patient doctor confidentiality. What is discussed between you and her during your sessions should not be talked about. Had the therapist been telling you about her, about how she is dealing with things.

“Your thoughts are very loud Alexia” the therapist jokes “To answer your question, no I don’t tell her about you. The reason why you know is because Y/N told me to tell you. She knew that once you knew she was here you would ask questions”

A small chuckles escapes Alexia’s lips. You always did know her well, it should come as no surprise that you still have the ability to predict her behaviour all these years later.

“When is her next session?” Alexia asks hoping to talk to you.

“Considering we have over run I would say” The therapist looks at her watch but then there is a knock on the door “Now. Shall I tell her to come in?” 

Alexia only nods her head.

She watches you walk in the room. Your ankle is in a boot and you are still limping, the grimace on your face is clear to see.

“I just have to grab a few things, i’ll be back in 10 minutes” 

The therapist leaves the two of you alone in the room. Something that hasn’t happened since she walked out on you.

“How’s the knee?”

“How’s the ankle?”

“You didn’t answer my question”

“Neither did you”

The silence that follows is comfortable but the tension is thick. The words that has been unsaid seem to weigh you both down yet neither of you are willing to be the one that breaks first. Alexia sees you turning the ring on your pinky finger and watches are you brows furrow, you are thinking and whatever you are thinking about is making you nervous.

“Why are you nervous?” Alexia asks.

“The last time we were in a room together you walked out” the memory of that night replays in your head and the feelings that followed soon come rushing to the surface.

The frustration Alexia feels is borderline overwhelming. She recognises the hurt on your face but cannot bring herself to care, or at least she tries not to. Ever since the night of the gala Alexia has a feeling in her gut that this moment was coming.

“And who’s fault was that? You slept with one of my best friends” 

Your head snaps up in the direction of your former friend. The venom in her tone hurts. 

“I didn’t know she was your friend” When you see Alexia open her mouth to cut you off, you hold you hand up to stop her. If Alexia wanted to do this then you would say everything you have wanted to say for years.

“When we talked about exclusivity, I recall you been the one to say we should keep it casual” you remember the moment clear as day. You hated that she didn’t want anything more but you were happy to have no strings if meant be able to call her yours, even if only for a night.

“Because that’s what I thought you wanted” Alexia tries justifies her decision.

“Well Alexia, me taking you at your word doesn’t make me the bad guy, it does however make you a liar” 

It worries Alexia how emotionless you are in this moment. There is no sadness or vulnerability in your tone, it is as if you are numb.

When you realise that this conversation is not going to have a happy ending you decide to change the subject..

“Like you said at the gala, that is the past” You laugh a little at the shock on Alexia’s face, clearly she didn’t know you heard her.

“How is your ankle?” Alexia asks sincerely.

“On the mend, I guess. The doctor said that if I got treatment when the injury first happened then I wouldn’t have needed surgery”

There is something that had been bothering Alexia since she heard you got injured in the champions league final. A feeling of guilt had settled in her gut and she knew it wouldn’t go away until she knew the truth.

“It was when I tackled you wasn’t it? You didn’t even have the ball but I was so frustrated and you were unstoppable. I knew I had to do something and I guess I jus—“

“Wanted to punish my for my sins on and off the pitch”

“Y/N I’m—“

“I don’t want your apology Alexia” You says truthfully.

Alexia doesn’t get the chance to respond.

“You ready for our walk?” The therapist comes back into her room, unaware of the moment she is interrupting.

Alexia watches as you take your boot off. The scar and bruising is still there. You wince as you put on one of your trainers and its’ like Alexia feels your pain. 

“Before I go. Remember I have been where you are, be patient. I’ll see you on the pitch soon Alexia” 

Those are the last words spoken before you leave the physio’s room.

You would like to say you haven’t thought about Alexia since that day in the physio room but she is all you can seem to think about. The past has been playing on a loop in your head for days. You had debated messaging her as a friend just to see how she is doing but bailed. In the end a 3rd party ended up making the decision for you. 

The text message from Alba was unexpected given that was 10pm and you was about to go to bed. 

It read I need your help, something’s happening with Ale and I don’t know what to do. 

You knew what was going on in the Catalonian’s head because you have been having the same thoughts. 

Alba picks you up the next day and uses her key to let you into Alexia’s apartment. 

“Alba I said I needed a day by myself. Why can’t you do as I say?” Alexia snapped when she heard the door open and footsteps approaching her. 

It was hard hearing that alexia wanted to be alone but it wasn’t surprising. Alba hadn’t told you much about why she needed your help but when you looked around the apartment you see why. The blinds are closed, the lights are turned off, the only evidence that someone is home is the small sound coming from the TV. You follow it until you reach the living area. 

There she lays with her leg elevated and the look of defeat on her face. You do see a brief look of happiness when she sees you, yet you remain in the doorway waiting for her to invite you in. There had been so many things taken out of alexia’s control and having people come into her home uninvited shouldn’t be one of them. 

“I heard misery loves company so here I am. Can I come in?” You ask her.

She makes you wait a little longer than you would have liked but when her face softens she pats the seat beside her. 

“I’m not miserable” Alexia pouts. The expression stays on her face when Nala jumps over to your side of the sofa, something that shouldn’t happen given that you have never met the dog before.

“We disagree, don’t we nala?” The furball barks in agreement making her owner laugh but only a second before her stoic face returns.

“Let me guess, this has to do to with Barcelona being in France for the AMOS cup? Missing out on international duty is one thing but missing club football, that is tough” You are speaking from experience but the pain and frustration Alexia feels blinds her from seeing that.

“You wouldn’t understand” Alexia absentmindedly begins playing with the velcro on her knee brace.

“Really? Lyon is in Portland for the WICC cup and I can’t be with the team so trust me when I say I understand how you feel Alexia” 

“How are you so…” Alexia tries and fails to come up with a word to describe your energy.

“Not pissed off at the world” Alexia nods at your choice of words “because I know that me being mad and pushing everyone away won’t change anything” It has taken a while for you to come to this realisation but now you had, things seemed to be getting better.

“Really Y/N? You have pushed everyone away because you are here in Barcelona when you live in Lyon” still Alexia chooses to argue with you but you let her, you know she needs to let her frustrations out.

“You know that isn’t true. I haven’t pushed anyone away I have simply chosen to see different people. I saw Lola the other week and then yesterday I went to lunch your new team and my former team Lucy Bronze. As for me being in Barcelona, I come here every year since” you stop yourself when you realise what you are about to confess.

“Since what?” Alexia asks even though she knows the answer, well half the answer. Every since Alba told her that you came to Barcelona years ago to confess your true feelings, Alexia has wanted to know more.

“Since I came here to tell you I loved you” you shrug your shoulders when you see Alexia’s eyes widen in shock.

Alexia stumbles over her words and she cannot manage to say a single sentence.

“What? Didn’t expect me to be honest? I know Alba told you” you knew this would come up since the her younger sister told you Alexia has asked about you. 

“But you never told me. Why come all the way here and leave without doing what you came to do” Alexia wants to know why you never told her, why you let her hate you for all these years when you loved her.

“I wanted to Alexia but then I saw you at the beach with your friends. You were so happy and knowing how much I hurt you, I didn’t want to risk you feeling that way again. It was clear that you had moved and I knew in that moment that I missed my chance”

You felt like a weight hand been lifted off you shoulders and placed on top of your heart. Now that Alexia knew how you felt it opened you up to being vulnerable and you didn’t like it. Alexia’s face gave nothing away and it only added to your anxiousness.

“You’re wrong Y/N I didn’t move on and I think part of me still hasn’t. It why I still has these feelings for you, some that are obvious like pain and frustration but then I have moments like when I found you were injured and I knew that I still care about you, more than I would like to admit”

Now it was your turn to be at loss for words. Alexia has always been your what if but now things could be different.

Instead of waiting for you to reply, Alexia asks a question which you wanted to know the answer to as well.

“What does this mean for us”

“It means we have a chance Alexia”

You look down at the time of your phone. When you stand to your feet it is obvious that you are going to leave.

“What are you doing? I want you to stay” Alexia begs.

“Unfortunately today is my last day in Barcelona, I need to go home” when you see the look of disappointment on her face you know that once again time is not on your side.

“But there’s some much more I need to say”

“Alba has my number. I’m only a call away”

As you walk away you do with a heavy heart. You didn’t think you would be leaving Barcelona having said what you came to say all those years ago but you are happy you have. 

“Goodbye Y/N” Alexia reluctantly says.

“Adios Amor” A nickname you hadn’t used in years comes out so naturally and by the look on Alexia’s face you can tell she likes hearing you say it just as much as you like calling her it.