#I'm fighting with my mother to get me tested and treated because I just want this over with and tired of being labeled as lazy and stupid

[imagination-confusion]

So, you may be wondering why I haven't answered the asks to Kittypet Kingdom yet.

College has started yes. I have gotten busy looking for jobs but most important in my free-time whenever I can work on it.

I can't. Physically can not because I love sharing about the first thing to come to my brain than actually work on the project.

I have an inappropriate distribution of my attention span.

I shared so much of Kittypet Kingdom lore, fun facts, and etc that my brain logged it as "complete" and I can not start actually working on it because I already shared about it.

It's basically:

Me: sharing details of my story And its gonna be so good! I can't wait to create it!

Friend: Oh I can't wait to read it!

Also Me: proceeds to in depth explain every single event and character and plot- just the entire fucking story because I was excited

And then!

And then after you've unofficially shared the story, your brain logs it as basically a completed task and continuing to write the goddamn thing just has you like this!

IT'S A GOD DAMN FIGHT WITHIN MYSELF BECAUSE I WANNA BE A FUCKING MYSTERIOUS WRITER BUT, I CAN NOT LEARN WHEN TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND IT'S ACTUALLY GIVING ME PAIN!

I LITERALLY HAD A COMIC ALMOST READY TO BE IN PRODUCTION BUT I SHARED SO MUCH ABOUT IT AND HYPED MYSELF UP AND SHARED THE CHARACTERS THAT I ACTUALLY INTIMIDATED MYSELF OUT OF WORKING ON IT AND IT'S BASICALLY ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO WORK ON IT NOW.

[cutebat]

Hii!❤️🖤

This is my first request ever, and sorry if it's not really something you feel like writing, but I really live your writing style and I think that you write the boys the best! (And this thoughts been eating away at my brain for a bit)

So what if the bat's take in a little reader who seems super innocent and she (it doesn't have to be a she if ya don't want) has Deadpool's healing abilities. Like she just casually gets a limb cut off in a fight trying to protect one of the boys and she acts like nothing really is wrong- or she gets shot in the head and sits up a minute later and straight up laughs seeing everyone's sheer panic because she has the same mindset as a gremlin wanting to thrive in the chaos. Do ya think the boys will let her go on missions with them due to her not being able to die? Or will they try (and probably fail) to lock her away in the manor for her own good?

Warnings: Yandere, manipulation, a little bit of blood, accidentally hurting someone, using powers for the wrong people

Spoilers for my original Batgirl story!

After your father was banished and your mother imprisoned, you were now under the roof of the League of Assassins, living with Lady Shiva. Throughout your life, you've been treated like an outcast by basically everyone at that exact area she had to spend your childhood at.

During those times, something felt strange about you.

Whenever one of the assassins came back injured, you curiously stepped forward them and placed your hand onto their wound. The next second, it was gone. The wound.

The next thing happening is you being in the medical bay, in the room full of injured assassins.

One of them told you to touch an injured assassin with a damaged leg. You were hesitant, but you were forced to step forward and place your hand onto the leg. The next second, it was healed.

You were then tested to see what kind of symptoms you have, and the results turned out that you have the ability to heal any kind of injury once you touch it.

Every time when an injured assassin comes back from a job, Shiva would make you stop what you are doing and quickly place your hand on that bloody part of their body, disgusting or not.

However, there are some side effects to your special abilities.

Each time you heal a person, your energy will decrease rapidly, which means you can't heal more and more people.

Eventually, you grew of being used like this. So, you decided to run away.

It was basically a risk of your life, but you eventually made it out of the city of 'Eth Alth'eban and tried to find yourself a new home.

As soon as you landed in Gotham City, you were basically trying to hide yourself from the world. You tried hiding yourself in various abandoned buildings, alleyways, etc.

Until you found a tall figure looming over your crouched form.

"Are you alright?"

The deep voice asks as he reaches out to you, which makes you jolt away and hide behind some trash bags.

However, the figure pulled your small frame out of your hiding spot and held you like an injured kitten.

"It seems that you've been out here for quite a long time. Come on, let me bring you home."

He tells you before he walks off with you, shaking in his arms as he makes a call.

"Alfred, bring everyone back at the manor. We finally found her."

~~~~~

I'm sorry if this was too short!

[dragon-watcher03]

If you can. May I asked for another MK1 x MILF Reader intro dialogues with daughter as well with Mileena,Liu Kang and Tanya if you can 🫶🏽 Love your work

Oof, idk if I'll do Mileena and Tanya very well, but I'll try for you anon <3

Mk1 x Milf! Reader pt2

Ft. Mileena, Liu Kang, Tanya

Note: Idk if you're asking for flirty into or not, so imma do flirty just in case.

Mileena: As an empress, I could use a consort. Y/n: Oh? Is that an offer, your majesty?

Mileena: D/n is certainly an interesting being... Y/n: Interesting is a bit of an understatement.

Mileena: I now understand why Liu Kang made you so perfect. Y/n: laughs Flattery? Really?

Y/n: It's a shame you have no lips for me to kiss. Mileena: That won't stop me, darling.

Y/n: So, you and Tanya had a thing for each other? Mileena: Yes, but now I want you as my queen instead.

Y/n: You seem to forget that the Tarkatan doesn't affect my kind. Mileena: That I am glad about, so nothing will get in my way of having you.

Liu Kang: Do you feel the same about me as prior timelines? Y/n: If by that you mean completely lovesick for you, then yes.

Liu Kang: D/n has been making exceptional progress in training. Y/n: With you as her mentor, I'm not surprised.

Liu Kang: Not even me in prior timelines can resist your beauty. Y/n: giggles How sweet, you really are smitten for me.

Y/n: So... You plan on making yourself D/n's father yet? Liu Kang: I'm working on it, Y/n. I must make sure everything is perfect first.

Y/n: You're like, really pretty. Just reminding you. Liu Kang: I don't think I'll ever get used to your advances, Y/n.

Y/n: Up for another spar, pretty boy? Liu Kang: I-uh... sigh Look what you do to me, Y/n.

Tanya: You would make an excellent Umgadi. Y/n: I would be honored, Tanya.

Tanya: Both you and D/n are very alike. Y/n: Like mother, like daughter.

Tanya: How is a woman such as yourself single? Y/n: What? Are you trying to change that?

Y/n: I see you and D/n have been training together. Tanya: Indeed, and she's proven quite a formidable opponent.

Y/n: D/n told me she's down to have 2 moms. Tanya: Then we'll make that happen after this.

Y/n: You got some nice legs, little Phoenix. Tanya: They'll be wrapped around your head once we're done.

D/n: Boy am I glad our kind can't get Tarkatan. Mileena: I agree, I'd hate to see you and Y/n get infected because of me

D/n: So like, you wanna get something to eat after this? Mileena: It will be my treat, D/n.

Mileena: Have I earned the title of "mother" yet? D/n: Honor me with Kombat, and you will.

D/n: So is this another training session? Liu Kang: Y/n asked me to test how well I've trained you.

D/n: Say, why didn't you make me one of your champions for the tournament? Liu Kang: Because I didn't want to risk losing you, D/n... And Y/n would've killed me.

D/n: You're one of the only people I know who fights with a weapon. Tanya: I can teach you to wield one if you wish.

D/n: Imagine people's faces when I say I have 2 moms. Tanya: You always find the small things amusing.

Tanya: You and Y/n would make excellent Umgadi warriors. D/n: Woah, really?

[roeyliteratiforever]

So if your looking at things from Jess' pov his mom just kicked him out to live with his uncle he barely knows, he has a lady he's just meeting for the first time talking to him about how she knows what he's going through and to him it feels condescending even if it wasn't meant that way by Lorelai. He doesn't want to be in Stars Hollow initially so he starts acting out to test how quickly he could get sent back such as stealing garden noms...etc, then he meets a girl who shares the same interests as him and the only person in town so far that doesn't automatically treat him like a preconceived opinion about him and she makes him feel comfortable so he proceed to impress his crush with writing notes in her book margins (that says I want you to know me) and pulls pranks that would make her laugh to then learn she has a boyfriend and learn that he is beloved by her mother that loathes him.

Dean does all the "perfect boyfriend things" while being a possessive, explosive, and an emotionally abusive control freak. Jess only wants to then spend more time with her, but the whole town already thinks he is trouble because of the reputation he set for himself.

He gets into a car accident with Rory and people then act like he's the spawn of Satan. He becomes so anxious and feels so bad after the accident that he leaves town because he doesn't want to cause Rory any harm or get harm from the weirdo townies. When she comes for him in New York he gets this burst of hope in him which is why he decides to move back for the possibility of being with Rory.

After Rory kissed him the first time he was so gone for her and in that moment that was all he wanted. He genuinely thought she was going to break up with Dean and choose to be with him, but when she didn't and left instead (my boy who already has deep abandonment wounds) is hurt because she didn't outright choose him and left. He then was alone without the one person in that town that he wanted to be around and so he met Shane who didn't want anything serious so it was a perfect way to try to mask his pain with her. He mysteriously gets a car, and people are going nuts thinking he stole it, and he's thinking I can't even get a second job without people thinking I'm a criminal, and I can't get a second job without people accusing me of being a drug dealer or a stripper.

Once him and Rory get together he is so happy he doesn't want to mess it up with her and he gets nervous because he wants everything to go right. She's the one he's been waiting for and now he has her. Then her ex boyfriend starts stalking and harassing him in secret and he feels like he can't do anything about it, and can't even tell his girlfriend about it because he thinks she won't believe her if he told her, so he bottles it up. When he gets attacked by the swan and she thought he got in a fight with Dean and didn't believe him it really hurt him. (I don't blame Rory for this she had no way of knowing and Dean was being manipulative with his "nice guy" and shitty behaviors but it still hurt Jess none the less.) After that he begins to put up his walls again.

When he realizes he's been messing up after not calling he then starts trying to do better and set dates and plans to be with her. All he wants to do is make her happy at this point. Then he gets the news that he's not graduating and in that moment it feels like everything everyone had always said about him came true, he felt like a failure and knowing that he wasn't going to be able to keep his promise to Rory that he would take her to prom crushed him. He wanted so badly to be there for her and do all the boyfriend things and he was so afraid of telling her he wasn't graduating and so upset he couldn't keep his promise to her. His smart girlfriend was getting into an ivy league school and he wasn't even going to graduate highschool and the thought of telling her that was horrible to him.

He could feel he was losing her and he thought once he told her that it would be over, and ended up messing things up with her anyways. He felt like he was doing her a favor by leaving because he figured she would want him gone. He didn't think she would want him to stay, even though that's all she wanted. He was battling his demons alone and was used to everyone shipping him off when he messed up that he thought he was doing her a favor by leaving after he messed up so bad.

His father that left him as a baby showed up in his life for the first time and he didn't know how to handle that. Once Luke kicked him out he ran to his dad that left him because crashing on his couch or floor was better than staying with his neglectful deadbeat mother.

He finds out his uncle was hiding his car from him and felt double betrayed he was already feeling abandoned yet again after Luke kicked him out to then find out he took something he worked so hard to get from him he was more betrayed. He comes back to Stars Hollow to get his car and everyone still wants him gone. Luke tells Jess to stay away from Rory so he proceeds trying to avoid her while he is there and he knows how badly he messed up with her and he wants to talk to her but when he sees her at the firelight festival he wants to explain to her but she is still so mad and all he could get out was that he loves her. He just wanted her to know he then leaves because he doesn't expect her to say anything he just wanted her to know. Jess is deeply hurting at this point inside and his pain is at it's peak. He just keeps digging a deeper whole and doesn't know how to fix it at this point.

Luke convinces Jess to go to his neglectful mother's wedding and goes to a bachelor party where he is assaulted by his stepdad to be at a bar and he naturally goes into defense mode. He was so used to his other abusive step dad's that he was constantly in defense mode and fought back. He goes to his mother's wedding anyways and walks her down the isle despite everything his mom put him through. Luke gives him the self help book that he had been reading, and Jess reads it and tries to better himself as well, meanwhile Lorelai scoffs to Luke about it. (I love Lorelai but that was extremely uncalled for by her and it just makes me think no matter what he does or how better he becomes he will always resent him, and it just makes no sense that she has this one sided grudge with a kid that was deeply in pain.) He makes up with Luke and thanks him for everything he did for him, and then he goes to try to apologize and tell Rory how he feels, but then he sees Dean there and he is thrown off and he just wants to make things right so in the spur of the moment he asks her to leave with him because he just wants to fix what they had. (He wasn't thinking rationally, but he meant it when he said she could count on him now and so he went out and turned his life around and made something for himself and came back to show her how much she could count him now even if it meant as a friend. He would still be there for her and he showed her that he could be the person she always knew he was. He still didn't expect anything from her he just wanted to show her his book, and let her know he couldn't have done it without her.)

He was so badly traumatized while him and Rory were together and it couldn't have possibly worked out at that time. He was battling so much pain internally, and everyone in that town was against him and actively hating him 😭 and I just feel for what he was going through, and I'm just so proud of who he turned out to be. I'm not sure what this rant was anymore but I'm just thinking about Jess' perspective and his pain right now. He was in so much pain while him and Rory were together and he didn't know how to properly express that or tell her that, and I just want to hug him and I'm so proud of him for how far he came and how much he overcame his pain and trauma and ugh I just feel so much right now. (Also I had a lot of coffee today and my autistic/ADHD brain is just going with thoughts right now.)

[doberbutts]

I mean this is a pretty hot take but I think until y'all can sit down and actually provide examples of what you mean by "privilege" instead of using the word as a means of referring to the nebulous idea that some people have it better and its Their Fault, there will continue to be absolutely braindead takes about who holds what privilege and how it conflicts with actual first-hand experience.

That's why, when I ask what male privilege I was apparently either born with or received immediately upon coming out, I get crickets.

When we talk about male privilege, we talk about getting paid more. We talk about getting hired more, and into higher-paying jobs more. We talk about being able to vote and drive and have credit cards and bank accounts. We talk about reproductive freedom and body autonomy. We talk about rape statistics, domestic violence, and other forms of violent crime. We talk about immigration and citizenship status and human trafficking. We talk about power dynamics in relationships. We talk about society's expectations for gender roles.

There's two big problems with this:

Unless a trans man is completely binary, fully stealth, and has burned every trace of his past, almost none of this is accessible to him. Trans men don't get paid more unless their gender marker is M, there's no mention of ever being anything but cisgender, and they're completely stealth. They don't get hired more, unless these things are true. Many lived lives being discouraged from chasing higher paying jobs such as STEM fields due to being seen as girls, so they're not going into these jobs more either. Similarly with voting- when I registered to vote I was non-passing, with my legal name and gender marker. To the voting office, I was a woman. To my credit card company, who has never seen my face, I'm *still* a woman, despite passing most of the time. To my bank account, which I've had since I was 8, I've never not been a woman. When I took my driver's test, I was treated as a woman.

When I asked for a hysterectomy at 20, I was told not until I was over 30, had a minimum of two children, or had a husband to sign off on it. Just like a woman. When I whacked my head as a kid and was rushed to the doctor, the doctor specifically said if I was a boy he wouldn't have bothered stitching but a girl can't have scars on her face *while he was stitching my forehead back together*. I had to fight to be allowed to cut my long hair. I had to fight to be allowed to take care of it by myself.

I have needed to leave relationships when I realized I was with a man that would hurt me for his gain. I've been assaulted by my peers for being a black woman or a black girl in a space that I was not wanted.

I was raised with the expectation that I would be a mother to a large family with a husband that kept me pregnant and likely staying at home like a typical tradwife. I was punished, physically, mentally, emotionally, socially for rejecting that life. I lost literally all my social group from before I came out. I lost a good chunk of family members too, and the ones I have left are... trying, but not perfect.

And:

Other marginalized men are also often denied access to these things either. White men might be paid more, but white women make more than men of any other race. White men might be hired more, but "Rachel" is more likely to get a call back than "Rafael". White men are more likely to be in a STEM position, but tell me when the last time you saw a Native doctor. It may have been *legal* for racially marginalized men to vote, but those who did not speak English had no ability to do so until 45 years *after* white women had the right to vote (and technically it took another 10 years for translations to actually be provided). Banks and credit companies and driver's tests and mortgage brokers and more are *known* to discriminate, between barely-legal remnants of redlining to outright illegal discrimination because they know they can get away with it.

Black and Native children are taken from their birth families and placed into foster care and adoptive homes daily due to state-sponsered genocide. It's more than just the mother that's affected by this. Black men are largely targeted by stop-and-frisk policing policies that exist to do nothing except harass and assault them for just existing in a place, and are an extreme body violation.

New studies show that men experience rape and domestic violence at roughly the equivilant rate as women, but reporting is obscenely low due to social pressures and rigid gendering of victim vs abuser policies. The demographic with the highest rate of murder victims is black men.

Single, childless adult men are not allowed to immigrate to multiple countries, including the US, on refugee status. Men of marginalized races- largely latine and asian- are trafficked by largescale construction companies and then deported or abandoned when no longer needed.

Disabled men are killed or abandoned regularly by their able-bodied partners who got tired of dealing with them.

I know more than one man who feels trapped into a place where he cannot, ever, show any emotion besides horny, hungry, or angry as a direct result of strict gender roles being pushed on him. I know more than one man who has tried to take his own life because of it.

I know more than one man who has succeeded.

And I gotta be honest the further I get in transition and the more I pass the more I think that being a man... also kinda sucks. Like it sucked when I was a woman. Doesn't really feel like it sucks less as a man. Seems to me like society treats both of these pretty poorly and I was told the grass was way greener on this side and it's, uh, not. Not really. Not when you start making cis male friends and start realizing that a lot of these guys had a lot of the same experiences you grew up being told was part of a woman's life.

And I'm not saying that these guys don't have interactions where life is better for them because they're men. Of course they do. That's patriarchy for you. But I do think it's difficult to have a "male privilege" argument when people try to argue on a 1-to-1 basis and it just straight up doesn't work like that.

And I know a lot of what I'm saying ties back to the theory of intersectionality, that this can't flatten nuance like this is directly tied to the fact that a white woman, a native woman, an asian woman, a black man, a latino man, and an arabic man, are all going to have WILDLY different experiences that you can't just "well you're [gender] so you don't experience [harm]" about because it's blatantly untrue. Especially if you continue to add marginalizations, like immigration status, religion, sexuality, transition, language, and more.

[princeescaluswords]

not sure if it was meant to be done elsewhere, but my favorite fic of yours is 'Ten Things That Scott McCall Can't Say'!

Thank you!

I wanted to point out something. In Second Chance at First Line (1x02) Scott gets angry at Stiles while riding in the Jeep because he feels Stiles is treating Scott's transformation and the danger like a quest in a video game:

Scott: I can't find anything about wolfsbane being used for burial. Stiles: Just keep looking. Maybe it's like a ritual or something, like maybe they bury you as a wolf. Or maybe it's like a special skill, you know? Like something you have to learn. Scott: I'll put it on my to - do list, right underneath figuring out how the hell I'm playing this game tonight. Stiles: Maybe it's different for girl werewolves. Scott: Okay! Stop it! Stiles: Stop what? Scott: Stop saying "werewolves"! Stop enjoying this so much.

Now, we're supposed to believe that Scott's agitated mental state is due to the wolfsbane rope concealed in Stiles's backpack, but this scene also marks something else, just as important. This is the last time we see Scott get angry at Stiles because of how Stiles behaves toward Scott. Scott may become exasperated at Stiles's insistence on murder as a solution when it comes to Derek, Jackson, and Liam, but that is in defense of others, and Scott does judge Stiles in Lies of Omission (5x09) when he believes that Stiles kills Donovan to protect his father, but I cannot think of another time when Scott expresses anger or even frustration at Stiles at how Stiles treats him specifically. If you've read my blog know I believe that there were plenty of opportunities for this.

Now, moving forward to the other end of Scott's character development, compare this exchange to the scene in Pressure Test (6x15), where Scott is gathering his things to leave Beacon County after his father negotiates a deal.

Rafael: Look, I know this isn't what you wanted, but it's the right decision. When Stilinski called... Scott: Can you hand me that shirt right there? Rafael: Now, you can be mad at me, but I'd rather watch you leave the state than watch you die. Scott: (SIGHS) I'm not mad. I get why you did it. Rafael: Scott, you're not the only one who gets to protect his family. I'll be downstairs.

We've seen Scott lay into his father before in Insatiable (3x23), but he doesn't in this instance. While the circumstances are different, both scenes have a character making what's happening to Scott about them instead. But now, six seasons have passed, and Scott has learned that there are things he can't say -- or, more precisely, emotions he can't express during a crisis situation.

Teen Wolf made it a point to explore the burdens of leadership. Derek was an incompetent alpha because he made decisions based on his emotional reactions to events -- anger at what had been done to him and his family -- and Scott has managed to mature into someone who can put aside his own emotions in order to do what must be done. Scott has demonstrated this growth, and he will do it again in Season 6 when -- after a harrowing night of listening to his mother struggle to live on the operating table -- he goes to Peter -- Peter! -- and asks him to join the fight against Monroe.

Personally, I literally seethe in reaction to that scene in Eichen House in Werewolves of London (6x17), but the show was relentless in its conviction that a good leader has to put their own emotional responses to the side in order to be effective. I would have loved if Scott had unloaded, verbally or physically, on Peter after that villain enabled a fanatic to point an assault rifle at his own daughter and the man trying to protect his ungrateful ass, but that wouldn't have made stopping Monroe any easier. So Scott didn't.

Fanfiction gives us what canon didn't, and the lesson Scott learn about suppressing his own reasonable emotional responses is what I explored in this story. I suspect that the movie commented on that by having Scott move to Los Angeles -- somewhere he could be free to express himself -- but I wish it had been more explicit.

[sawtastic-sideblog]

'Dear Lawrence,

It's been two years, three months, and twenty six days or eight hundred and forty eight days. The guilt is manageable but still eats away at me everyday. I cry to get the emotions out, but only in the shower. I don't want the others to hear me.

John is having us watch a lawyer. I only take the pictures. I never grab the test subjects or help with John's games. Mark and Amanda do that.

Speaking of them I suspect something more going on. I can't prove it but I think they're having hate sex. With as much as they fight it just seems likely. John seems to think so too. He confides in me. It's probably because I still don't talk.

I talk to you sometimes. Only when I'm alone. I whisper into the void and hope my message will get to you. Wherever you may be.

Anyway, back to the game. The guy, Westley Edgar, lives near where you, Alison, and Diana lived. They don't live there anymore. I know where they live, though, and sometimes I'll check in on them. I try to once a month. Diana has grown up so much. She looks like her mother, but she has your eyes. Alison is doing good. She is casually seeing a guy, but I don't think it will go anywhere. Both are still working through losing you. I am too.

I'm still bad at staying on track, but the almost eight hundred and fifty other letters could have told you that.

This Edgar guy gets the bad guys out of the really bad sentences and a few have even go free. John believes it's injustice. It'll be Edgar playing the game with some of the guys he let go or something. I'm not sure.

As I always say, I miss you. I hope you can forgive me. One day. Maybe.

Your friend,

Adam'

Adam closes the journal and hides it in the top of his closet. As he does, a knock sounds from the door. He slightly panics and goes to grab a jacket from a hanger as the door opens.

"You ready? John wants those pictures of Edgar's wife by tomorrow," Mark asks. Adam nods and pulls on the jacket as he walks toward the door, closing it as he walks out. Mark leads the way to the workshop.

"We're off. We'll be back by five in the morning."

"Don't get caught," John says, not looking up from the contraption he's tinkering with. Mark nods and walks out of the door on the far side of the workshop. Adam follows him to the car and they get in.

"You gonna talk tonight?" Mark asks as he parks the car. Adam looks at him with a neutral face. Mark nods before saying, "Thought so. Why don't you talk?"

Adam just shrugs and turns in his seat to grab his camera from the back seat. When he gets situated in the seat with his camera set up, he sends a text to Mark.

'Did you bring food?'

"No, I did not bring food. I plan on walking down to the convenience store later. Just to have something to do. Unless you need something now?"

Adam shakes his head and holds up a water bottle. Adam pulls up the Netflix app on his phone and turns on the show he and Mark had been watching together. Some kind of glass blowing competition. It seems to shut Mark up and Adam finds it interesting that such beautiful pieces can be made from sand.

The night goes on without a hitch. Mark went and got them food around midnight and Adam got enough photos for John to use. As the pair pull up to the workshop, they notice another car.

"Whose car is that?" Mark asks. Adam shrugs and gets out of the car. With arms full of equipment and left over snacks, Mark and Adam walk into the workshop. "I don't need help. Thanks though."

"Didn't ask. Don't care," Amanda says from where she sits, sketching what looks to be some kind of head cage.

"Not even about Adam?"

"Especially Adam," Amanda quips before standing and glaring at the men. "I don't get why he gets special treatment. Because he won't talk? Because we have to treat him like Lassie? What is it boy? What is it? Little Timmy fall in the well again?"

As Amanda speaks, she pats her legs and pitches her voice higher to taunt Adam.

"Amanda," John's voice echoes around the large space. Amanda turns on her heel.

"What? You treat him differently than me," Amanda's arms are wide.

"I do not and don't argue. Mark and Adam have had a long night, I'm sure. So, why don't we let them go rest and you can start on the plan to get the subjects here."

Adam goes to the red room that John had set up for him and sets the camera equipment down.

"Whose car is that?" Mark asks as Adam makes his way across the workshop floor.

"An old friend," is John's only reply before he walks off toward Amanda. Adam grabs himself a glass of water and downs the whole thing before walking down the hallway to his room.

As he nears the door, he notices that it's open. He stills and presses himself against the wall. Carefully, he peeks around his doorframe and his eyes fall upon a cane leaning against the foot of the bed, then a pair of brown shoes, the right leg straightened out and the left slightly tucked beneath the desk chair where a figure sits. Adam's gaze falls upon his journal in the hands of the person in his room. Not just any journal. The first one he started writing in after he got here. The one that bares all his thoughts and feelings of losing Lawrence, waking up in John Kramer's lair, the one where he learns to breathe again.

Adam doesn't look at the person's before he strides into the room and rips the journal from the hands of the intruder and holds it to his chest as he turns away. He takes a deep breath and walks to his closet where he quickly opens the door and shoves the journal on the shelf before closing the door again. He stands there head against the door as he processes the emotions of some random guy reading his most private thoughts.

A hand on his shoulder causes him to jump. He hunches his shoulders and tries to cave in on himself, begging the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

"I've missed you too, Adam," the intruder's voice is familiar. Adam's eyes widen as he turns around to face the man before him.

"Lawrence?"

[crimeronan]

Hey, i just wanted to say that my thoughts are with you. When I was a child, my mother got very sick and underwent a long, long period of testing until finally they realized she might have lupus and then finally realized she has rheumatoid arthritis. there are times she has been very sick and times she has been very well, and getting her to accept that she has a disability and that she needs to listen to her body was a long fight, the latter still ongoing. it’s so good that you are already conscious of that. i know you know that life can be lived just as thoroughly with a chronic illness as without one, but i’m hoping that hearing it from someone who’s seen it for over ten years can be helpful in some way. sending you strength & hope. I hope things get easier as soon as possible for you <3

thanks so much! it helps that i've had a lot of chronically ill people in my family and friend circle. if i start treating myself like shit after saying "listen to your body" to them for ages, they will KICK my ASS.

it's hard to be in the in-between period waiting for treatment -- since the doctor's office isn't open today, i won't hear back about whether i can be seen sooner until tomorrow at the earliest. and since i've already messaged the doc and can't do anything proactive, i find myself just laying in bed googling things like "survival rates for MCTD" and then being like girl. don't do that.......

i'm antsy to get treatment and i hope i won't have to wait a full two months before that happens. but mainly i feel really validated and relieved. it's hard to explain to people that you can kind of feel things going Badly Wrong in your body, especially when there aren't specific symptoms or test results to point to. i've been getting progressively sicker over the past few months but there was a very real part of me going, "is this just because i'm not exercising enough, though?? am i just making up excuses not to exercise or do chores or do my job because i've gotten too comfortable burdening my partners??"

so i almost can't believe i have on-paper confirmation now i feel SO lucky and blessed. turns out i've felt sick because i AM sick and the choice to laze around making life harder for people was in fact a lifesaving one! who knew.

[bestbidani]

TWs in the tags.

Losing our cat is already hard enough. But healing is especially hard because I feel like I can't fully lean on friends and family for support.

I have to keep the details to myself because the experience was extremely traumatic. Like, "I made my therapist choke up" PTSD traumatic. I don't want to distress anyone else with the ugly details of that night.

But it's painful, keeping it all to myself and staying quiet as these horrible scenes replay in my head over and over. I can still see and hear him and how scared he was. Hell, I can smell that night.

It's awful. I just keep reliving it repeatedly against my will.

It would be different if I mostly remembered the version of him that was happy and healthy. But then I'm flash banged with memories of him suffering.

I keep telling myself it's not my fault. We did everything we could with the information we had. But it wasn't enough. Our best wasn't enough. We were backed into a corner and had no way to fight or escape.

In his last moments, I sobbed hysterically, apologizing to him over and over.

I'm sorry I didn't spend more time with you. I'm sorry I didn't play with you more. I'm sorry I didn't brush you more often. I'm sorry I didn't say "I love you" more often. I'm sorry I moved you when you jumped on my desk. I'm sorry I got upset when you sneezed on me. I'm sorry I fussed at you when you scratched the furniture. I'm sorry I didn't give you treats more often. I'm so sorry I didn't take you outside more often; I know how much you loved being outside. I'm sorry we didn't treat your ear infection fast enough and you lost your hearing. I'm sorry I didn't insist on doing more diagnostic tests sooner. I'm sorry I didn't recognize that something else was wrong sooner. I'm sorry I let you get so sick. I'm sorry you suffered so much. I'm sorry that you're scared. I'm sorry that you can't even hear me say any of this. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you like a mother should. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I'm sorry I failed you.

I'm so sorry.

I love you so much, Roland. I hope and pray that you knew how much we loved you. Please wait for us on the other side.

He was a pure ray of sunshine.

And now our world is so dark.

[sup-im-jasper]

For More Than it Seems

- Jasper Moon

I was not meant to exist.

My mother was told she couldn't have more kids --

I guess I just wanted to prove I could.

My memory is clouded --

either clouded or exactly as I remember --

full of fights and fear.

Discussions with my brother

of what we would keep at each parent's house

(should they get divorced).

My parents split more times than I remember.

My dad had been kicked out once.

He would pick me and my brother up,

take us to the mall, or to the hotel pool where he stayed

while my mom's boyfriend-of-the-month filled his space at our house.

He found a townhouse,

took his name off the rent, and planned to move.

My parents stayed together.

I come from anger.

Anger and a long line of hurt.

I embodied that anger for longer than I'd like to admit.

And eventually it turned to nothing.

COVID took away the anger --

at least most of it --

and it faded to numbness.

I started to coast through life,

just trying to stay afloat long enough to see another day,

to see things get better.

Life keeps moving --

no matter how much you want it to stop,

want it to pause.

Everybody says things get better,

and I didn't think they did for a long time.

Eventually they do.

But everytime it has, it doesn't seem to last --

the roller coaster will go downhill eventually.

Sometimes it comes in waves;

everything will be fine

until it's not.

Then everything is miserable for a bit,

and then it gets better again.

And the cycle repeats.

I like to call COVID "the void".

The lost time

in all of our lives.

COVID broke me,

but at the same time,

it built me up.

It showed me who I was --

at least the start of who I am.

It showed me how broken I'd really been.

It was the start of rebuilding me.

Well... attempting to.

I feel as though I crawled from my own grave --

a grave dug by my early-teen self.

Who knew life could be so difficult

for a 13 year old.

I had to help myself.

Fear instilled by society and my own parents

to not ask for help.

Convince myself that I'm being dramatic,

it's not as bad as I think,

people won't believe me,

other people have it worse,

anything to convince myself that I'm fine.

Everything's fine.

Dysphoria only added to the dumpster fire

called my brain.

My early teens were filled with

big feelings and not knowing how to handle them.

I'm learning how to manage.

I learn from people online

because there is no world I can imagine

in which I'd feel safe enough to tell my parents.

My queerness was forced out of me --

telling my mom I was gay was the only way I could protect myself

from telling my family I was trans.

I've tested the waters.

They don't feel very warm.

I think too much.

About everything.

But sometimes I forget

that one day

I'll be 27,

living on my own --

maybe with my brother --

away from my parents.

I'll be free.

I'll be safe.

I'll be me.

I want my story to be important enough

that I won't be forgotten when I'm gone.

I want people to know my name.

I want to be remembered,

to be worth more than I ever have before.

I want to leave an impact on this world,

leave it a little better than I found it.

I want to achieve everything I can.

Be the best person I can.

I just want to prove that I can --

that I will.

I hope people will remember me

as an important part of their life --

I hope I helped someone.

I hope someone I one day lose touch with

reaches out when we're adults

just to check in.

It's hard to imagine myself as an adult.

It feels like my whole life is confined to the now.

But I think it's really cool

how we treat every moment like it's the only thing that matters.

I hope one day I'll appreciate this moment

for more than it seems.

----------------------------------------------------------

NOTES:

- written May 30 & Jun. 3-4, 2024

[tomathomatommy]

trying to get the guts to call my mother and tell her she will never see me again. for context, i came out as transgender when i was around 11 years old. I am 22 now. when i first came out, i gave her so many resources that she rejected and did "research" of her own which was only ones she would agree with. but i still dressed and presented myself as male to her anger and dismay. during this time (ages 11 to 16) she would go through my journals, bedroom, laptop, anything she could while i would be at school or showering. when she would find evidence of me being trans, she would destroy it or confront me immediately which would turn into a screaming match about how awful i am and how im tearing her life apart. Binders i saved money for, people donated to me for, were stolen and burned in front of me. And when i was 17, i legally ran away and lived homeless/independently until i was almost 21. during this time, she would guilt me into making her want to self harm, she would call police on me, she would call me sobbing about her dead daughter and how could i do this to her. her mother while dying wrote me out of her will, as did the rest of my family. she stole food stamps from me over the pandemic because it was sent to my childhood home as i didnt have an address and wasnt aware it was being sent. i threatened court and once again, it was all my fault and i want my family to starve. they in fact moved up a tax bracket after i left as they werent paying for anything anymore. but at the same time they got rid of my health insurance (not my brothers) when i was 13. And now, more than a decade of waiting, begging, educating, she will not budge. my father has come around and will respect my name and treat me like a person, but even if my father is calling me Thomas right in front of her, she refuses and doubles down. like to test me to see if I'll blow up again. it was about two years ago when i made my last attempt for my family for be able to have me around and still. nothing. she wont even over text or in my own home respect me at all. not even to my partner. So, I'm done. i have tried and tried and tried but it is so purely apparent to me that my family is too far gone. they have learned respect through fear, which i will not comply with. they are so vain and insecure and fake, all of them. they arent christian, they arent good people and never will be. I have not been allowed to meet my cousin who is now almost 6 because of my queerness. my brother who i previously mentioned should be in prison for crimes he has committed against me, and unknowing women and girls (children). but they paid for him to go to germany, flight school, a mustang, a drone, and a GED. And if those are the type of people my family wants to give their love and care to, then that isnt my family. I wont lie, it hurts. it more than hurts, its crushing. heartbreaking. my entire life even before coming out, being a girl in a male dominated family, i had to fight tooth and nail for anything. but i was always still disregarded. then i become something they wanted, but not exactly so it still isnt enough. graduating while homeless, surviving attempted murder and constant abuse, getting my first car and apartment, landing modeling shoots, anything. I will never be good enough as long as i am Thomas. I will never be loved by them as long as i am Thomas. All of them have in written evidence and have told me to my face that i am not their son. i am not their blood. Fine then. we'll be strangers from now on. Part of me doesnt even want to say goodbye. after the fourth time i truly feel that none of them deserve it. im truly just ready to be done.

[independentzaun]

Am I going to do anything with this? No

However because Cassandra Cain from DC has lived in my head rent free for a few years now...

A backstory for Cassandra Cain set in Zaun under the cut. Content warnings for mention of child abuse, neglect, murder, violence, depersonalization, objectification. (There is no SA here as a note).

Cassandra Cain born of a Piltovian father and an Ionian mother both of whom were among the greatest close combat fighters and assassins of the world was brought about because her father wanted to create the best assassin in the world and to wield her as a weapon. His idea was authorized due to people in Piltover wanting Vander (yes that Vander, in Zaun) to be killed but were willing to wait years in order to accomplish it in what would commonly be seen as a rather humiliating way. This was put into motion before Vander adopted Vi, and Powder and in fact Cassandra is around the same age as Jinx.

I'm not going to get into her childhood details here (if you know about Cassandra Cain you know what it was like. If you don't know but you want more details come yell at me), but she was literally raised to be the perfect killer and weapon. She was not raised as a person. She was raised as a living close quarters weapon in order to be an assassin. However things changed after Silco took down Vander. After that her father decided to start testing Shimmer on Cassandra when it became "publicly" available.

For the next 6-8 years Cassandra continued being raised, trained, treated, and used as a weapon as steadily more and more shimmer was shoved into her. These days her eyes basically look like...well..

They do not ever go back to normal, and she has a habit of hiding them under a mask or hood.

Unlike in DC she has killed more than once. Her father was very careful not to force her hand too young, and when he did have her start killing it was against barely human shimmer enhanced fighters that didn't register quite the same way as normal humans. The problem was when he gave her an assignment, and sent her to kill a completely normal human family. She killed all of them except for their child, and than fully realizing just what she'd done and had been doing Cassandra simply didn't go back to her father.

She is now homeless, and alone in the depths of Zaun which presents her with an interesting difficult. She will never kill again, but she is also in essence the best fighter in Zaun however she's not good at anything not related to fighting and infiltration. Parkour, climbing, fighting, lock picking, etc.etc she can do. However she can barely read, is bad at talking, and has issues understanding people unless she is looking at them to read their body language. She is however quite good at telling when someone is directly lying to her. It's not hard to manipulate her though if you gain her trust, and know how to phrase things correctly. You don't have to lie in order to not tell the exact truth, or to say things in a way that are beneficial to yourself while leaving certain details out. She also has a lot of potential as a potential team leader, and could grow a lot should the right person decide to help her for whatever reason.

She also loves seeing people dance, and dance in general. So if you ever want to find her honestly just wait for a special dance performance to be held, and than look up and into the shadows.

She'll probably be there lurking.

[kamikanlupanari]

Hey, I saw your post about Li-Fraumeni syndrome. I just learned about it today bc my grandmother was diagnosed with it and my mom is absolutely horrified that she might have it and is scheduled to get tested soon. The genealogist isn't actually certain if it's genetic in my grandma's case but doesn't have any other leads, hence my mother getting tested.

If my mother has it, then there's a 50% chance that I could have it. I can't lie, I am devastated and scared shitless. I don't want to die young or continuously battle cancer throughout my life. I'm also scared of the changes I'll have to make to my body in order to survive—like getting a double mastectomy, for instance. (Not that there's anything wrong with people who get or want them btw!! I'm just feminine and genuinely enjoy this part of my body.)

I am so scared and have no idea what to do. I'm sorry for dumping this on you, but do you happen to have any advice for me?

I'm really sorry to hear about that. If I could give you a hug, I would. Cancer is always scary, whether it's a family member or yourself. My mom was already in remission for Lymphoma and Breast Cancer before they discovered the genetic aspect that prompted testing for my siblings and I, and then had a brain tumor removed last year. And even then, my sister was diagnosed with Breast Cancer shortly after coming up negative for Li-Fraumeni, so even that's never a guarantee, I'm afraid.

For my case, I was always afraid regardless that I would get some kind of cancer just because I've had several family members on both sides die from cancer - if I did get it, it'd be caught too late kind of fears. Being diagnosed with Li-Fraumeni just meant that my doctor and I had a genuine reason to get frequent screenings ordered for scheduling. So instead of the every 5 years or as needed that would've been before, I get some form of preventative screening every year (usually an MRI with contrast), along with the surgeries I personally had always wanted regardless without having to argue and find a justification for them. (In that way, I'm in the opposite boat as you; I wanted the surgeries, but am certainly not gonna judge anyone for NOT wanting them.)

And, honestly, that's really the best advice I have for you. If you and your mother do come up positive, though I certainly hope not, then don't treat it as a guarantee that you'll get cancer and die from it, but as a reason for you and your doctor to work together to get those frequent early screenings scheduled to catch anything that does start to grow before it goes out of control. And if your doctor isn't willing to help you with that, then you find a different doctor who will. Even if you come up negative for the genetic test, if you one day feel something is wrong with your body, you fight for yourself to get whatever tests are needed to find the reason why. My mom's Lymphoma almost didn't get caught in time because her old doctor kept saying it was her diabetes or her weight that was keeping her from keeping any food down for weeks, if not months. Getting that second opinion and the tests saved her life. I hate to think of that happening to anyone else, but unfortunately it does happen pretty frequently for some people.

I rambled a bit here, but that's truly the best I can offer. Regardless of whether the tests come up positive or negative, just listen to your body if something starts to feel wrong, and find a doctor who will then listen to you and work with you to keep you healthy, in whatever way that means to you.

My best to you and your family. I really do hope you get good news, and have a wonderful year.

[mostofthethingsishouldntsay]

November 14th, 2022

Today is Monday & I find myself recovering from the worst week of my life. I think it's about time where I keep a diary again to contain all of my secrets and emotions because in truth I just can't handle bottling them in anymore.

To start it all off, this wreckage of emotions began with my period never arriving. Two negative pregnancy tests & a 'Plan B' pill prove that I am not pregnant, but with all these hormones flowing through my body, I can't even keep up with myself. What I really need is some understanding, empathy, and a support system but I can't seem to find that in anyone. Not even my boyfriend.

Marty has been an on-and-off "good" boyfriend. But I feel safe to say it here. I resent him.

I resent and do not love my own boyfriend, Martin R. Mosher.

Wow... Now that it's out there and I can see those words, I feel like a relief has been placed off of my shoulders. Maybe there was a time when I used to love him, but I haven't felt anything like that since summer. I stay away from my phone on most days so I don't have to respond to messages or text him. I go to school and enjoy my time to myself. Isn't it funny that school is my only escape from him now? It has to be because he can't call my school to find me like he does at BOTH of my jobs now. He always thinks of ways to find me. Even when I block him. He always finds a way to manipulate situations to get to me. To make me a bad person.

I guess that's what I am though. I am a bad person. I love it. Since when was the world in favor of good girls?

Anyway, putting the no-show period and raging hormones aside, Marty is just the worst. His fat fuck of a stepmom contacted my mother to get information about the nature of our relationship. He has apparently been lying about talking to other girls while dating me. I don't even believe him when he tells me that it was just something he made up to get his dad off of his back. I know he's been cheating on me. That's part of the reason why I loathe him so much nowadays. But he isn't the only player in this game. I have other options that I keep at arm's length. The only difference between him and me is that I used to be really proud to call him my boyfriend. I always talk about him, have pictures of him up, set him as my lock screen on everything, etc, etc... but he's a foul human being who disrespects me and treats me like dirt. He didn't even tell his parents he loved me. There is just no way in hell that Marty is an endgame. I have to accept that.

He's nice to have around for now. He's someone to buy me nice things, give me affirmations every now and then, and have sex with once or twice a month when I get to see him & that's good enough for me. But this past week has really proved to me that he's just a straight-up loser. He cusses me out every single day. He yells at me. He blames me for everything. He doesn't share the same level of understanding as I do for him. He is just a 23-Year Old baby that lives with his mom. He thinks he's made of money & yet he can't buy us a house, let alone a HOTEL to stay at for a few days. He can afford whatever he wants though. He's spoiled... Spoiled is what he is. He apparently had TWO Occulus Rifts. He had me buy him one, putting me in a brief financial crisis while he knew he had one all along. I've never been more disgusted by him in my life. Maybe once. Maybe the day I caught him watching porn in our bathroom.

He's just... such a friggin loser. I am so embarrassed that he's the guy I'm with right now. Max said that he would be happy to hook me up with Gem... but I'm starting to think that maybe emo/punk boys are not it. I do love them and think they are sexy as fuck, but if they're anything like Marty going forward... then I can't do it. The baggage, the abuse, the fighting... it's all so fucking hard to deal with. I can't stand that guy anymore. Even the sex is just a little above average. I've cum harder just listening to Corpse Husband songs.

I keep asking myself why I stay with him when I despise him so much. I know my worth, I know there are other guys, and I even know who does and doesn't want me at the moment, but I stay with Marty regardless. Maybe I enjoy the pain, maybe I don't recognize I have the ability to move forward, or maybe I simply need a placeholder in my life right now.

But... I also do have this tiny, tiny, TEENY voice in the back of my head screaming out at me to hold on. That MAYBE someday he will grow up and change and be the perfect guy again and I will fall in love with him all over again. All I have to do is wait. But waiting is hard & I find myself losing patience for that. Maybe I can wait.

I don't want to though.

[oddsunnywoo]

Party Meeting- Fezco x fem!reader

So, this is my fist time writing, I'm so sorry about my english, its not my first language

Italic>>> Rue narration

Y/n is a normal girl, she doesn't have a bad relationship with her mother, she likes to go to parties and also, stay at home, she has some friends,she is not 100% happy, but she isn't sad at the point to try to kill herself, never had problems with the guys or girls she ever dated, well, not until Nate Jacobs.

They are not like, dating or something, they are just having sex sometimes, but nothing serious.

- I don't understand how you can kiss him, he is so gross- Lexi was looking at me with a confusing look before turn her look to the street - Like, he is not in a relationship with Maddy?

-They are not like, dating, they are just hang out, I think.

-Well, I don't care what they are, but, you know that they will be there, like a couple, right?

-Yeah, but, actually I not sure what I feel about Nate, so this night, i don't care about he or Maddy- I say while a saw McKay's house getting closer.

Lexi stopped the car next to a group of boys that was in the football time with Nate.

-Look y/n, I just want you to be with someone that really loves you, you know a care about you- She says with a smile that I know is truly.

-I know Lexi and I love you for that- I give her a smile.

When we enter the house all that I could see was a lot of familiar faces, a lot of couples almost getting naked in front of everyone and A LOT of drugs, so, that was a normal party here.

-Look, I will try to find Rue, so, I see you- Lexi said while was waving for me and leaving me alone.

I was in the way to the kitchen just to look for something to drink when I could see Nate running to the pool, look like he was going to fight with someone there, he was with a really mad face, I've seen a lot of that face.

I start to drink a lot until the moment that I needed to sit or I will faded in front of all that people. I see an old sofa and that was my safe place at the moment, i sit there felling that my head would explode any moment.

-Hey, are you one of Rue's friends right?- I hear a slow voice talking to me, I look to my left and see a guy with a red beard and green sweater look at me.

-Do I know you?

-I'm Fezco- he raised his hand to me, a look at his face before take the hand to greet him back.

-You are the boy that works in the grocery store right? In the gas station?- I looked at him with a confusion face.

-Yeah, that's me, I still don't know your name

-I'm y/n

-Y/n? That's a really good name, I like it- he said with a dumb smile, looks like he's high.

-Are you high?-I said with a pity voice.

-Are you drunk?- He ask me.

-A little bit, I just drunk enough to forget about somethings and be happy- While I was talking, I could hear a lot of screams coming for the pool are- what the fuck is that?

-Probably the playboy, Nate, this guy is so full of himself- I can se he rolling his eyes.

-Don't say that about him, his not that bad- I could feel a smile in my face, but not a good one.

-You are his friend?-Fezco asked me.

-I'm like, more than a friend, but I don't know for real- you could see the sadness in my face.

-It's like, complicated right? Cause his dating Maddy.

-Yeah, but I don't think a like him that much, is like, I like to be with him but- I hesitate, but I can see that Fezco really wants to know- not the way he treat me.

-If you don't like that, why you have a thing with him?- he looks really confuse.

-Because we like each other and sometimes we are in really good terms and happy- I smiled a little remembering this moments- and what if this the universe testing me? And see if I'm really there for our "relationship", I know this sound crazy- I looked back at him and can see that he is looking to a kid who makes a signal to him.

-Look- he came closer to me and pass his arms around me- I need to go now, but if that guy don't treat you like a princess, he is not the one, don't listen the universe, I know you for like what? 10 minutes? And I already can see how special you are- He gets up to leave- I really want you to see yourself, like, how I'm seeing you right now, bye Y/n, see you around.

While I was looking him leaving, I felt other smile growing in my face, but this time, a good one.

-Oh- He's turn his back to look at me, bending down e putting a arm in my side- Can I have your number?

[spiderling-space]

Hey so this thought has been on my mind for like ages and I think that you'd be able to write a headcanon about it in a wonderful way, so I'm presenting this idea to you hehe ( I love ur blog so so so much btw!)

So let's say that whatever miracles of seven happened, that Yuu overblots. Being constantly pushed around by other students by being magicless, solving the idiot trio's problems, trying to survive overblots and dealing with Crowley's neglectful ass cheeks sure is not easy. With all the piled and bottled up negative emotions, Yuu like the previous boys, overblots. Yuu wasn't that hard to defeat cuz you know, they're magicless, but the twst boys did struggle and Yuu's quite the challenge too. So what if, after Yuu's overblot, they had a full on mental breakdown. Not like crying mental breakdown, they're full on SCREAMING, their voice are cracking too, and very painful to hear. They started to unconsciously harm themselves so they have to be tied down to prevent to hurt themselves further. How would the dormleaders react to that?

(Sorry for my English and if I ever break a rule, it's OK if you decide to not do this too. Btw I got this idea when I watch ATLA aka Aang the last airbender, for reference of the breakdown of Yuu just search "Azula's breakdown" that practically how their breakdown looked like :D)

I cant write headcanons because you basically wrote everything. I will just make comments and additions to this. first I mention the background, secondly Azula’s breakdown so non ATLA watchers can understand a little and lastly, MC having breakdown like Azula. For the record, I could write about ATLA for pages since it is something I love since 2005. LOL This became a bit meta xd

You can join the discord server here 😉🤣

Firstly, the back ground:

I was 7 years old when ATLA started airing. I’d be excited to get back home to watch ATLA after school. Azula’s breakdown was awful back then when I first watch it as a kid. And of course, when they aired the episodes again and again. I rewatched again because I remembered the show being dope when I was in 12th grade which was stress relief while studying for university exams, and then I rewatched last year and even founded a Zutara server. Now I’m getting back to the point. In the last two rewatching, I saw Azula in a different light and her breakdown at the end of the show was understandable. I can recommend some ATLA meta that you might like. 

Secondly, Azula’s breakdown: 

Azula lost everything. In the flashbacks, you saw she was getting along with Zuko, laughing and playing tag until Ozai’s influence on her grew while Ursa showed more affection towards Zuko since Ozai basically hated Zuko. These two triggered each other and it grew like snowball effect which came to the point that Ozai-Azula and Ursa-Zuko. She didn’t get love from Ozai, she was just a puppet, someone to empower him more, not his daughter meanwhile to Ursa, she was a monster. Azula was 8 years old  Ursa disappeared. Imagine how this would affect the child. After this, she had estranged brother that she was jealous of because of Ursa’s love, a father who manipulated her, and an uncle who was too in pain to do anything and he was more focused on Zuko. She only had Mai and Ty Lee as “friends” but it was toxic and Azula used fear to control them. After Zuko got banished, Mai and Ty Lee went to their own places, leaving Azula alone with Ozai. Just when Zuko got back, she was being like the last times, cruel teasing, Mai and Ty Lee with her. Later, Zuko went away and probably got lectured by Ozai for her lie. Mai and Ty Lee stood against her. In the end, she had no one. Ozai didn’t want her with him either because he only wants power. Being alone drew her to the edge. In the Royal Hair Washing, the girl sje fired had her face. Her self hatred was palpable. She started to reflect this via Ursa, the mother who thought her as monster and didn’t love her like she did Zuko. I believe she would have had breakdown if she actually killed Zuko. At the end, she couldn’t handle it anymore. Being all alone, not being loved, self hatred and finally failing at something which is something she knows Ozai would never tolerate like he did with Zuko. This 14-year-old wouldn’t be able to handle it anymore and had breakdown.

Now last section, MC having breakdown like Azula’s:

Let’s see the things MC went through:

Stripped away from home

Doesn’t have much memory of it

Is thrusted into a world so foreign to them, where everything is foreign to them. There is no familiar thing that can make them recall home or feel at home

Is forced to study things that they have no prior info where the others have prior info and they are expected to ace the tests. This puts on pressure on regular students, can’t imagine the pressure they would feel since they barely understand the magic.

Is treated like trash by everyone at least once. From the first moment they came to Twisted Wonderland, they were like dirtbag. Dire gave them a house where they could get Hepatitis A to C, tetanus, hypothermia and any other disease. They have lived in that state for months and the house barely got fixed by the end of exams. They got belittled or used by almost all characters at least once. Examples: Vil calling them nobody; Azul trying to take the only thing they have from them, the dorm; Riddle calling them uneducated because not having magical parents; Leona acting like they are a toy in E2; Jamil literally manipulating their choice; sometimes NPC characters talked; Cater making them do his work etc.

They are given more than a person should handle. They are not certificated psychologist, they aren’t superhuman, they don’t have super healing... They are just human but has to fight enemies than can easily kill them if it were not the magic users around them. They are given the task of dealing with the emotional breakdown of the other people.

All of these are building up more and more. Maybe they started to get along with people after the belittlement and being used but every new character does this. At one point, it will be too much and they will think “they are only nice to me because I did a favor to them. If not for that, they wouldn’t be nice to me” which would lead to self doubt. When one starts doubting themselves, everything else starts to go down. Also, new characters treating them that way adds salt to the wound.

MC isn’t a professional psychologist. They can’t handle other people’s issues without taking a toll at themselves. They don’t even catch a break between everything.

Dire is deliberately keeping them away from home as they all do the errands he say. To him, what MC wants doesn’t matter much. The game doesn’t show but if MC has family and friends or pets, you can’t tell me that they wouldn’t miss them once or see, hug them or know their state, alive-dead, healthy-sick etc. 

Lastly not being invincible. The end of Episode 5 shows this well. They couldn’t stand against Grim who isn’t as powerful as the other overblot characters. They are mortal who can get hurt easily.

Now all these build up meanwhile we don’t see an MC centered chapter, how they are etc. It’s all about the others. Maybe there were a few chapters asking if MC is okay after everything but it feels like it is in the second plan. 

Everything that I mentioned can lead to a breakdown like Azula’s. Everything is just too much to handle and they don’t talk with a professional about it. When they finally let out everything, it feels much better, screaming out their lungs, lashing out like all of them did. They are finally letting out all of their emotions, crying and screaming; yet still feels better than bottling everything up. They think maybe that’s how overblot characters felt.

All in all, everyone in NRC needs a counselor.