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#I'm not scared or sad or angry
milfcutlawquane · 1 year
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I don't... I don't even feel like watching or wanting to know anything about the Mandalorian anymore... How ironic thay the show thay introduced me into the Star Wars universe is the same one that makes me feel absolutely nothing about
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duusheen · 5 months
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The funeral
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hajihiko · 10 months
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If I may ask, which plot twist hooked you onto DR2?
The "you were the bad guys all along" one!
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bazkrekkers · 2 months
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No one talks about how hard it is to open up to people and let them in, trust them, believe them when they say "I'll be there.", "I care.", "You can talk to me.", "We're friends/family.". How hard it is to let your walls down and allow yourself to believe that someone truly means it when they tell you they hold space for you in some capacity. No matter how small.
You crack your chest open for those people and carve them out a cozy little space in your ribcage. You keep it safe and you guard it because you believe they did the same for you.
No matter what, no matter how long - you keep that space for them and only them. You believe wholeheartedly that they understand how much they mean to you, for you to have let them in like that.
Then you realize at some point that it was never that deep. They never noticed what it meant to you. You never had a place in their ribcage and you suddenly look around a room and realize that they never saw you, but an amalgamation of noncommittal traits that they passively noticed over the years.
You are whatever was right in front of their eyes at the moment. Nothing too complex.
That would actual take effort and effort is reserved for things that matter.
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ceno8yte · 5 months
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Yet another article (and shooting) to add to the list. Ugh.
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its-all-ineffable · 1 year
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Are there any moments in Sherlock that made you cry, or damn near?
I cry very easily at shows so...yes. There are many.
Soo-Lin's death in The Blind Banker was the first time I cried while watching Sherlock, and it still gets to me after all this time. Even now, tears well when I hear the music.
I cried in anxiety the first time I watched The Great Game and it was a child's voice on the phone, counting down.
The Reichenbach Fall is the episode that I basically cry consistently through. When people doubt Sherlock, when the kids are found, when the girl screams, the phone call, when Sherlock 'dies' and at John's speech at his grave. Basically the entire thing.
I cried at Sherlock's speech in The Sign of Three as well, like all the characters did.
Of course, Mary's death destroyed me and I sob like a baby every time, particularly when John begins to wail.
The Lying Detective is the other episode that makes cry loads: Sherlock being sad, Sherlock being depressed, happy tears at the nice conversations between Sherlock and fake Faith, tears at John beating him up, tears at Sherlock being almost killed. The Hug scene makes me bawl.
The Final Problem gets me when the truth about Redbeard is revealed and Sherlock himself starts to cry. And the final montage with Mary's voice over? Every single time, I sob. See, I told you I cry loads.
SEND ME AN ASK ABOUT BBC SHERLOCK
SEND ME AN ASK ABOUT AMC IWTV/THE VAMPIRE CHRONICLES
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pics-pizza-peace · 2 months
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Um. Having to wipe spit off of my floor, and try to stop shaking long enough to convince myself to eat a sandwich this evening is not what I expected to have to do, but whatever. This is a small update in case something bigger changes before tomorrow(if I stop posting or reblogging for more than 24 hours assume something happened I guess. yeah life's unpredictable and Fun sometimes--). I've been dealing with a lil head-cold(sinus thing. no real cough yet) for a couple days now, and I've been taking decongestants for the main symptoms. Which incidentally don't help my heart in times of stress...
My brother's schizophrenic symptoms Were seemingly leveling-out, that is until something else changed in his schedule that made his hallucinations worse again. He hasn't asked me too many questions, hasn't accused me of too much this time around, but. Not even 20 minutes ago he threatened me for touching my PC mouse to simply click on another video while I eat. He claimed some tinny British lady's voice was telling me what to do, that touching the mouse was like touching his hand, and to stop. He threatened to smash a bottle over my head. I turned the PC off, but he's not going to be allowed to refuse me access to my art/working/gaming PC. I still have more to learn/do towards building my website. Sure hope wherever Jerk's moving us this time has sturdy locks on the doors.
I tried responding as calmly as I usually do, he continued to threaten me with nonsensical claims. Used to take it personally back when it was all new. Tired of living with someone who believes that he'll somehow go "back to normal" with little to no interaction or effort in such a direction. Now I know better than to take it personally, but also I'm kinda grieving who my brother could've ended up being, if he got the help he needed when he was younger. The longer Jerk wants to avoid the short-term discomfort that reflection, acceptance, and even growth/change might cause; in favor of long-term disfunction, denial, & eventually total ruin. The more I am inclined to believe that he was not much of a good person in the first place. But often that's just dads. I'll be fine, just needed to type this out to process it better. It's been a while since I've been threatened & spat at for almost no reason.
Gonna try and eat, maybe read/watch something, hope nobody else gets into it with him... wanted to draw, wanted to keep watching something on the PC. No luck there for now.
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silver-ace-of-spades · 2 months
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I hate that I feel like I need to be funny all the time because it makes it seem like I don't care. I do care, and that's why I try to be funny. Making people laugh and smile feels great.
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fairyknifefight · 3 months
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mandrakeboo · 3 months
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genshin fanon makes me sooo mad. like do they even realize that kaveh and alhaitham actually do talk to each other normally. that they usually don't bicker, and actually enjoy each other's company? that they have friendly debates and conversations? do they that they're both individuals with really high standards for themselves, and that's why they work so well together?
(more under cut so it's easier to scroll past)
or that gorou is a leader, and a general, who genuinely cares for each and every person in his army? who works very hard to grow stronger to attempt to present physically as the expectations of general say he should? that he isn't a weak or cowardly person, but instead gets harassed, misgendered, and unfairly treated by someone who he'll never have the social status to challenge? that all of his people who died under his orders, even in the fight for freedom, still weigh heavily on his heart? and that he'll have to deal with it for the rest of his life, because the only other person he has to support him has an even heavier burden of ruling an entire country while struggling with insomnia?
that baizhu isn't just his illness, but also isn't just healthy or normal either? that his life every day is the suffering and constant pain that comes with his contract, but also the wonder and beauty that comes alongside it with everyone he heals? that his humanity comes from his suffering, but also the good he creates alongside it?
to say it again because it's 12 and I Don't Need To Have Coherent Thought; fanon makes me sooo mad. noo the short guys aren't twinks. no the tall men and women aren't your waifus or husbandos (I think people who use those words should have their tongue cut out, only half kidding but nobody cares). nooo don't remove their emotional depth and turn them into a marketable plushie. don't collei them. cherish them and accept their flaws as who they are, not as something to be fixed or changed.
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sparksflys · 4 months
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thornedswan · 5 months
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I don't get how...people don't comprehend that I don't wanna do T because of my own reasons and worries
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peppermintbutch · 6 months
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Anton compilation
#i miss him so much going through old photos on my laptop and like every second photo i took was an anton photo#there were so many little things about him that will never be there again. But I'm so happy i got to see them even the disgusting ones.#he would lay on my feet when i was cutting vegetables. he would flatten his ears as a way of saying hi.#he would do his best impression of a human hello when encountering people on his walks. he loved to eat carrots#and whenever he got one he'd run off to his bed with it and the crunching would be so loud.#he could notice when people were angry or sad and he'd try to comfort me and lick my face when i was crying.#we'd throw sticks for him into wheat fields and he'd lose them in there and prance like a deer only his ears sticking out.#he smelled really awful most of the time. he loved to eat shit and dead animals.#he was really scared of sheep and skylarks and our neighbors cat#he loved swimming and when he first learned how he splashed around so much like a little fountain.#he liked to sleep with his head on my shoes. at night i would hear the tap of his little feet#and then a thump when he'd lay down against my parents bedroom door and then a really loud sigh.#he once got on the table and ate the bolognaise when my mom was picking me up from school but he left a plateful for me#he made genuinely the strangest noises I've ever heard a dog produce.#after i moved out he was always so happy when i came to visit. he loved people#when he was younger there were a few trigger words that made him so excited he'd run up the stairs and howl. one of them was my sisters nam#as he got older he became more of a baby and so cuddly and calm.#i'm really sad that i didn't get to say goodbye to him or be there when he died but i hope he knew how much i love him
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oaxleaf · 7 months
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actually, fuck swedish state television (svt) for being so fucking dedicated to spreading moral panic about trans people. i haven’t seen anyone talk about how far this country has backslid into transphobia these past few years, but no small amount of it can be rooted back to svt. there's not much social awareness on trans people due to our culture of not involving ourselves in other people's choices, and this lack of general knowledge is now being exploited by goverment funded news and entertainment networks. how they spew out badly researched articles about puberty blockers and like one or two people who detransitioned or were not one hundred percent happy with their diagnosis. they deliberately make it seem like hrt is just being handed out to any child expressing discomfort in their gender rather than the truth that you have to wait 2-3 years in this fucking country to even get a consultation. it’s really fucking hard to get gender-affirming care here, and svt seem dedicated to rile the people to make it harder - because apparently a child going on reversable puberty blockers is worse than a child killing themselves because they don’t get the care they need. they so badly want to call this a debate, but it’s not, because a debate has two sides and they have not done a single thing to do their duty of being unbiased and show multiple view-points. they even took the opportunity to spend large parts of their special program on stockholm pride to spread factually incorrect and dangerous anti-trans view points. fuck them. fuck this country. we pride ourself on being so good on human rights, but we’d prefer children take their lives rather than recieve the healthcare they need
the threat against trans people is not just a us thing. this shit is happening everywhere
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i-eat-lip-gloss · 7 months
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Well, time to get ready for school (I'm getting ready early since I didn't sleep a wink last night ans I'm getting bored. I'm supposed to wake up at 5:30 am, but rn its 5:02 am for me)
Kill me
When I get home I'll tell y'all how it went (maybe doodle dump too)
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