#I've got my book club on this next week so might come back with more thoughts later

[hoeratius]

I’m doing my dissertation with Flowers in the Attic as a case study! Penny for your thoughts?

Okay, with the caveat that I haven’t a clue what your dissertation is on so not sure how relevant any of these thoughts are – here I go!

Note – this contains spoilers for Flowers in the Attic.

Who is the target audience for Flowers in the Attic?

This is not me describing the target audience.

This is me not having a clue what the intended audience is for a book that features phrases like "Oh, golly-lolly!" as well as erotic descriptions of a toddler’s underwear.

I read this for the first time when I was about 12 and again now I’m nearing my thirties. The first time round, it felt naughty and like I was reading something that was clearly Adult Literature. Now, I see the childlike phrases and excessive use of exclamation marks and think it’s not just because of the narrator, but because of the audience as well.

Like, this book is twee.

It’s about so many layers of incest and child abuse and neglect and religious extremism and repression and it somehow manages to be twee. HOW?

The incest (let’s just get that over with)

Everyone in this family is into everyone. My edition has questions at the back for a book club discussion, and one of them goes:

Had their father not died and they were all still living together, do you think Cathy and Chris would have instead developed sexual feelings for their parents? Why or why not?

And like, those sexual feelings are there the entire way through.

Cathy wants a husband like her father, who gives her a ring and ‘vows to forever love my Cathy just a little bit more than any other daughter’. When their mother calms Chris down, you get a paragraph like ‘Kiss, kiss, kiss finger his hair, stroke his cheek, draw his head against her soft, swelling breasts, and let him drown in the sensuality of being cuddled close to that creamy flesh that must excite even a youth of his tender years.’

Like – Okay! Cool! That is a way to describe your mother! And your brother! Like, this could just be an embrace between a mother and her son and instead it becomes this incredibly loaded, sexual passage. And that happens constantly. The narrative is obsessed with sex, with the sin it might bring and with the changes bodies go through to make it happen. I didn’t count how often Cathy thinks with jealousy of her mother’s breasts but it’s a recurring theme, and I’m kind of glad their father died before Cathy hit that part of puberty because I do not need to hear whatever feedback he’d have given her when she first goes shopping for a bra.

The Aryan perfection

Did you know they are blond? And blue-eyed? And so pretty, prettier than anyone else their age? Perfect? Like dolls? Did you get that??

Maybe it was a eugenics plan to maintain the most Aryan family in the universe, but good lord, has Cathy internalized it.

The good bits

After Cathy and Chris have a sexual encounter where he kisses her breasts after stabbing her with scissors, Cathy asks:

“Chris – what we did just now – was it sinful?”

Again, he cleared his throat. “If you think it so, then it was.”

I’m too early in my thoughts to have anything very coherent to say about this, but it does show their complex relationship with sexuality in a really interesting light. Does anything other than P-in-V count as sex? What is the boundary between normal familiar affection and incest? (Personally, I’d say the family cross the line from ‘normal familiar affection’ constantly but equally, I can see why kissing people on the mouth doesn’t have to be inherently sexual or inappropriate. It’s just that V.C. Andrews’s prose makes everything sexual.)

I also thought it was very bold of VCA to have Chris describe the sex as ‘rape’ immediately after it has happened. Keeping in mind that this book came out in 1979, he is the romantic lead, and it was (I think???) aimed at teenage girls, I was not expecting them to name the beast by its name. Even if Cathy assures him it wasn’t rape (and let’s not get into the victim blaming paragraph, jfc), having it out in the open immediately? Actually sensational.

On a different familiar note, I loved the way they kept waiting for their mother to return and the way their love faded differently for all of them. Cathy’s turning to bitterness sooner (prompted by jealousy over Chris’s affection?), versus the twins becoming alienated and addressing her as ‘Ma’am’ by the end… And yet that constant hope that she’ll show up, the disappointment when she brings gifts rather than freedom…

Corinne’s wilful closing of her eyes to justify the neglect haunted me– the way she stops looking at the twins, doesn’t see how Chris and Cathy are maturing. Especially because Cathy is in exactly the age where so much is changing in her body and there is the horror of being perceived (the paragraph where she describes wearing loose clothing to hide her new curves and feeling like she’s being seen anyway – I remember that.)

And at last: the reveal of the arsenic. Iconic.

The bad bits

Other than the writing (so many exclamation marks!! What the fuck!!! The action of going down the stairs doesn’t need this emphasis!!!!!), I just want to say, with my whole heart, that the twins are the most annoying characters in literature. And their insistence at the start that everyone will surely love them, they are so cute and perfect?

Honestly, if I’d been the grandmother, I’d have thrown them out of the window during their first tantrum.

Overall verdict

Do I like this book? I don’t know. I tried to come up with more bits that I disliked, but everything – the twee-ness, the weird sexualization of everything, the “Oh boy”s and stilted dialogue – it all feels very organically entwined. I definitely understand why it became a middle school obsession when it came out in 1979 and it’s going to haunt me for quite a while to come, I think.

I don’t think I’ll read any of the follow-ups, but I might (might) treat myself and reread the De Beers series one day, or that one set in New Orleans with the evil twin. VC Andrews(‘s ghostwriter) was not afraid to go big and there is a certain appeal to such shameless commitment to drama.

[captainsophiestark]

Vigilante Book Club Part 2

Jason Todd x Reader

Masterlist - Join My Taglist! - Part 1

Written for my personal fic writing challenge for 2024, Sophie's Year of Fic! Featuring a new fic being posted every Friday, all year long :)

Fandom: DC

Summary: After having an all-around terrible day, the only person who might be able to make it better is a certain book-loving vigilante.

Word Count: 1,562

Category: Fluff

A/N: This is the closest I've come all year to missing a Friday lol, but we got it done! Woohoo!

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

****************

I hummed to myself as I moved around the kitchen, dancing to the music I had on in the background while making sure everything cooked just right. I had a reputation to fix, after all, and I was determined to get it right.

After the Red Hood had broken into my apartment to return my favorite book last week, I'd convinced him to come back for a thank-you dinner and to talk about the book, which he'd been planning to read in the meantime. He'd also vaguely insulted my cooking, although I'd mostly forgiven him for that in light of him returning my book.

Tonight was the date we'd set for dinner and book-talk, and I'd spent the week preparing the perfect recipe. Even better, the kitchen currently smelled amazing, which had to be a good sign of success.

Right on cue, about the same time he'd shown up last week, I heard a knock on my door. I smiled, trying to ignore the way my heart sped up a little as I quickly wiped my hands on the kitchen towel and headed for the door.

I paused just long enough to look through the peep hole and, as expected, the Red Hood stood towering in my doorway. This time, instead of the whole-head helmet, he only had a red domino mask on. Thank goodness, since the dinner part of this whole evening would be ruined if he couldn't actually eat without revealing his secret identity. I swung open the door with a grin.

"Hi! I'm glad you came! Honestly, I was half expecting you to be at the window again."

He just grunted and shrugged.

"I wasn't sure you'd actually be home, or still up for this. Figured I'd come to the door and give you a chance to pretend not to be home."

"Don't be ridiculous," I said, waving off his concerns as I opened the door wide. "I've been looking forward to this all week. Unless, of course, you're here to hate on my favorite book. If that's the case, I think I'm going to have to throw you out."

He laughed. "Don't worry, I'd never do that. I know what a true favorite book means to a reader."

I gave him a little smile and a nod as I closed the front door, then headed past him into the kitchen. I gestured to the bar stools at my counter as I checked that everything still looked good.

"Have a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?"

"A water would be great."

"Sure thing! Coming right up." I filled up a glass for Red Hood and myself, then fixed him with a smile as I set his glass down in front of him. "So... notice anything different from the last time you were here? Anything in the kitchen, maybe?"

He hummed, pausing and pretending to think. I put my hands on my hips and raised an eyebrow, and after a moment, he broke and grinned.

"I'll admit, the kitchen's looking much more promising than the last time you said you were making dinner in here."

"Thank you," I said, smiling as I turned around to start plating everything. "I told you, last time you were here was just a record-breaking bad day. A cooking fluke."

I could hear him hum behind me, at least pretending not to sound totally convinced.

"Next time, I'll make something. Everything you've got going right now looks amazing, but I'm a pretty good cook myself. I wouldn't want you thinking I'm acting like a critic out of nowhere."

I hesitated a second before turning around, trying to get my ridiculous smile and racing heart under control. I technically didn't know him very well yet, but so far, I'd started to really like Red Hood. I loved the idea of making this a regular thing, and I loved even more that he'd suggested it. I took a deep breath, then finally turned around, my smile still massive but at least a little more reasonable.

"Deal. Next time, you cook."

****************

I laughed, closing my book and shaking my head as I looked up at Hoodie. He looked back over the top of his own book, one eyebrow raised.

"What?" he asked, leaning slightly towards me. I shook my head, smiling all the same.

"Nothing. I just know why you wanted me to read this book so badly now."

"Oh yeah? And why's that?"

I cleared my throat dramatically and lifted Hoodie's copy of Northanger Abbey, which he'd temporarily loaned me, before starting to read:

"The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid."

Hoodie grinned. "I'll admit, I may have levelled that quote at a family member or two. Although, I might widen the original to include stories in general."

I snorted. "And if one of those family members said they loved podcasts or movies or something, but not books?"

"No, they're the exception. They're idiots whether or not they enjoy a good story."

I laughed, and after a moment, Hoodie joined me. Since that first reading date, we'd made our unofficial vigilante book club into a weekly occurance. He always came over to my place, and we spent the evening talking about books, or reading together and then talking about books. We alternated who cooked, and this time, it was his responsibility. He had food cooking in the crock-pot, and the delicious smells had been temping me for the better part of the past few hours.

"So I take it you're enjoying the book?" he asked, laying his down in his lap. I nodded, mirroring his gesture and sitting up a little straighter.

"I am. I can't believe it took me so long to get around to reading it! I've loved all the other Austen I've read."

"Which is why we get along," he said with a grin. I nodded.

"I could never spend time like this with a man who didn't at least appreciate Pride and Prejudice."

"Of course not."

"But what about you? Are you liking your book of the week?"

He nodded, scooting a little closer to me on the couch.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again, you have good taste in books. I don't think you've picked one yet that I haven't liked."

"...Now I sort of want to take that as a challenge."

Hoodie just rolled his eyes.

"Be careful. I've read some shit I wouldn't wish on anyone, but I can and will use it as payback if I have to."

I laughed. "I don't know, I've read some pretty unbeatably bad ones..."

"Oh yeah? Well how about-"

He stopped short at the sound of a ringtone. I raised an eyebrow as he grimaced. Not once, in all the weeks we'd been doing this, had either of us let a phone interrupt the night.

"Sorry. Vigilante phone," he grunted. "Just a second."

I waved him off to let him know it was no problem, and he shot me a quick smile before answering. To my surprise, he held it out in front of him and put it on speaker.

"What do you want?" he barked without a hello. "I'm busy."

"Yeah, so busy that nobody's been able to get a hold of you all night!" came an exasperated voice that sounded much too young for that level of exhaustion. "We started prepping for Alfred's birthday-"

BOOM! A loud noise that sounded too close to an explosion for comfort cut off the rest of the sentence. My jaw dropped open at the same time that the kid on the other end of the phone shouted out at the top of his lungs.

"JASON! What happened? Are you- oh shit, I think that was on my end." A brief pause, some scuffling, and the sound of an alarm in the background as Hoodie—as Jason—and I sat frozen in place on the couch. "Just get back here as soon as you can to help!"

The kid on the other end hung up, leaving Jason and I in the ringing silence of my apartment. After a moment, the man on the couch next to me sighed heavily, and I decided to beat him to the punch on further breaking the silence.

"I am... so sorry," I said. "I know you probably didn't want that, like, getting out, and-"

"Stop," he said gently, reaching out to take my hands in his. I did, opting instead to chew on the inside of my lip as I looked at him with wide eyes. "Look, it's not exactly how I wanted this to go, and I wasn't expecting Timbo to use the vigilante phone to say my civilian name, but... I've been thinking about telling you for a while. I'm not upset that you know, and I've know you long enough now that I trust you to keep my secret."

My mouth dropped open a little as a thousand butterflies exploded in my chest. This was a major leap of faith and trust in the relationship we'd been building in our little book club. I squeezed Jason's hands, smiling as I leaned into him a little. He grinned back at me, then sighed.

"Now, if you hated Austen, maybe I'd have to be a little more worried about all this..."

I gasped. "I could never."

"Exactly. You're not somebody I'm worried about here."

We shared another, softer smile, and then I reluctantly dropped Jason's hands.

"Speaking of people you should be worried about... whoever made that call sounded like they could use your help."

Jason's eyes rolled back so far I couldn't see the pupils anymore.

"They're idiots who should never be allowed anywhere near a kitchen, but they'll survive without me for a little longer. At least long enough to do this."

For a split second, I expected him to lean in for a kiss, and my heart did a backflip in my chest. Instead, he reached up for the domino mask still sitting comfortably on his face, which somehow seemed more intimate.

Slowly, he pulled away the fabric, revealing the bright blue eyes it had been hiding. When he smiled, this time I could see the corners of his eyes turning up along with his mouth, and even from a few feet away I could see his gorgeous eyelashes. It took some actual effort not to swoon, even though his face didn't change significantly from when he'd been wearing the mask.

"Like what you see?" he asked, tone soft but joking. I huffed a laugh and let a smile make its way back onto my face.

"Yeah. I do."

"Good. Then... what do you think about going out? On a real date, with me, not Red Hood? No pressure if you're not interested, but-"

"I would love that," I said, my smile morphing to take up my entire face. "Jason."

He beamed back at me the second his name left my lips, the two of us gravitating towards each other until his vigilante phone started blaring again and Jason rolled his eyes.

"I better go. But I'll see you... this Friday? Pick you up at six?"

I nodded. "It's a date."

Jason grinned, his eyes darting back to me every few seconds as he collected his things. We agreed to just keep each other's books until Friday since we wouldn't get to finish reading them together tonight, making Jason the first person I'd ever trusted with my only copy of a book. Our goodbye took longer than it should've since he had explosions to deal with and we were seeing each other again in a few days, but neither of us could bear to part any faster. And when the front door finally shut, it was hours before I actually wiped the smile off my face.

Who could've guessed something positive would come out of one of my most obnoxious bad days to date, let alone someone as wonderful as Jason?

****************

Everything Taglist: @rosecentury @kmc1989 @space-helen

DC Taglist: @gaychaosgremlin @v1ckycheesue

[johannestevans]

Lots of new work, some comedy, and an upcoming pub quiz for Galway Pride!

Good evening!

You can get these updates direct to your email inbox here.

So much to cover this week. I have a bunch of event announcements and several media recs - just scroll down to the bottom if you just want my round-up of new works published.

First things first - I've started playing with some buttons on Zazzle, trialling some badge designs for when I'm selling books at conventions next year.

These, and a few other designs, are available on my Zazzle store now! They're obviously quite expensive for individual badges because it's a print-on-demand store, but I'm planning to experiment with some designs over the next year or so, with the hope of selling these sorts of pin badges (as well as stickers and so on) for cheaper later on.

Secondly, I did a comedy set at Ireland's Smallest Comedy Club last week, and I'm going to do another set at Basement Jokes, also here in Galway City, on the 17th of May. If you're up this end of Ireland, come along at 8pm! Basement Jokes is a free entry comedy club, and it's in the basement of The Cellar Bar. Here's the show info.

Thirdly, if you're not in Galway next week but you can make it down the week after, I'll be hosting a pub quiz to help fundraise for Galway Pride this year. There'll be a big quiz with a bunch of rounds, and there'll also be a raffle with prizes from local businesses - there'll be a few signed copies of Heart of Stone in with the other prizes. Quiz entry is €5 per person, and you can find the info here on EventBrite.

A few people have recently approached me about doing book clubs and so on, so I just wanted to state explicitly here that I'm more than happy to answer questions and chat on stream at queer or fantasy book clubs via Zoom or similar! If you're going to have Heart of Stone or any of my other work as your book club pick in Ireland, the North of England, or Bristol, depending on where you are, I might be able to come along in person and sign books and so on! You can reach out with that sort of enquiry at contact@johannestevans.com.

Media Recommendations

Maintenance Phase - Maintenance Phase is a great podcast that Lewis got me into, and I've been catching up on a bunch of their old episodes of recent - Maintenance Phase is put together by Aubrey Gordon and Michael Hobbes, and it's a podcast where they unpack common myths and outright lies told in the wellness and diet industries, especially common fatphobic rhetoric, bad science, and conartistry by fitspo and health "experts". They get so catty with unpacking this stuff and it's so cathartic to listen to, but it's all backed up with good, robust tear-downs of the shitty science behind a lot of what they're tearing apart. If you want to listen to just one episode to see how you feel, I would recommend, Is Being Fat Bad For You?, from 16/11/2021.

Yellowjackets (2021--) - Presumably everyone and their mother has been telling you already to check out Yellowjackets - let me just add to the cacophony of voices and say, absolutely, do it. It's got cannibalism, it's got lesbianism, it's got toxic codependency, it's got mental health issues out the wazoo, it's got all the trauma, it's got a breakdown of the effects of misogyny on young sports women in the 90s, it's got cults, it's got the wildest gore, it's got bears, it's got a classic plane, it's got everything! It's fucked up and it's pretty fucking harrowing, especially in the second series, but I'm very much enjoying it.

Lawn Dogs (1997, dir. John Duigan) - This is such a fun flick, and one that I think I related to a lot in regards to the childhood emotions depicted - this is about a young girl growing up in an isolated gated community and her friendship with a guy who mows lawns and is an outsider to that community. I really fucking dug it, I loved the fairy tale aesthetics contrasted with the miserable reality, loved the unpacking of class and gender feels, loved the trauma, love the particularly scathing depiction of emotional neglect. I did review it, and I also watched the same director's 1994 film, Sirens, which stars Hugh Grant. I was planning to go through Duigan's back catalogue and watch some more of his work, but I just want to forewarn that Thandiwe Newton has accused him of sexual abuse - this has obviously put me off going back through it and has tempered my feelings about the art to say the least. Obviously I believe Newton, and if you are going to watch Duigan's work, make sure to do it in a way that won't give him further payment or aplomb where you can.

For new releases, I watched The Pope's Exorcist (2023, dir. Julius Avery) and Dungeons and Dragons: Honour Among Thieves (2023, dir. John Francis Daley & Jonatham M. Goldstein). These are obviously very different films, one a supernatural horror about an Italian exorcist on a silly little mopend and the other a fucking A++ adventurous romp of a DnD party on a disastrous and delightful campaign - I recommend them, glowingly and with love, in the same breath because both of them feel so completely sincere and earnest in their shameless love of their subject. There's no ironic self-effacement, there's no sarcasm about the plot from within the plot iself, there's no attempts to imply that the characters or the plot are above or superior to others in their genre. Everyone in these movies goes fucking ham, they camp it up, and it's absolutely glorious. I am so tired of Joss Whedon-esque quips about how shitty the tropes are while we're doing the trope - this sort of return to open sincerity is where it's at. I also watched Renfield (2023, dir. Chris McKay), which unfortunately is not nearly as good - I mention it because it's Nicholas Hoult and Nicholas Cage hamming it up as vampires, and there's some fun aesthetics even though the broader execution is unfortunately pretty shit.

I was in a mood for classic musicals this week, and so I went back and watched Fiddler on the Roof (1971, dir. Norman Jewison) which is obviously one of the best film musicals ever made, and also Guys and Dolls (1955, dir. Joseph L. Mankiewicz) and Hello, Dolly! (1969, dir. Gene Kelly). They're fun, silly films, and I'm planning to dive deeper and watch a few more old musicals if I can stay on this kick. If you're in the mood for classic movie M/F/M threesomes, there's obviously Cabaret (1972, dir. Bob Fosse) and Singin' in the Rain (1952, dir. Stephen Donen & Gene Kelly).

I've also been replaying Xenoblade Chronicles (2010) this week, and I really recommend it if you've never played it before! It's a gorgeous game with a beautiful soundtrack and some really fucked up themes around body horror, cannibalism, and war alongside the central fantastical plot, and I love it a lot. It's on a few platforms, but I'm playing the original on the Wii.

New Works Published

Firstly, for some Tumblr stuff, I had:

Some notes about casual sex and hook-ups as a disabled person, for which I would love if people do have resources to contribute!

I gave some advice about approaching the introduction of new characters, especially when coming from a background in fanfic.

And if you're doing Monstrous May, I put together some header images for use on your social medias!

Movie Review: Lawn Dogs (1997, dir. John Duigan)

I talked about this movie a bit in my media recs section, but this review is a more extensive dive into the film's themes, especially class, childhood neglect and isolation, queerness and going stealth, and the social dynamics at play in the film.

On Medium / / On Letterboxd

Erotic Short: Hypnotised

Monstrous May Day #3: Hypnotised - An assistant bartender is drawn in by a vampire.

1k, M/M, rated M. Some sexy hypnosis for the purposes of public blood drinking — no sex. An entry for Day #3 of #MonstrousMay.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Erotic Short: The Tentacle Beast

Monstrous May Challenge Day #5: The Tentacle Beast - A priest makes a pledge to his chapter's master. 

Cis M/tentacle beast. Just 600w, short and sweet! For the Monstrous May Challenge 2023.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: The Many Deaths of Baldr the Undying

One of Odin’s record-keepers interviews the god Loki.

Here’s a big one! 13.6k, rated M for violence, featuring some Loki and Baldr, some Odin scheming off-screen. Lots of delving into and playing with the stories, but with an angel thrown in for flavour.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: The Injured King

A king seeks out the healing services of a local witch.

Just a little 800w piece.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy/Romance Short: Paper Houses

A train conductor begins a relationship with a regular passenger.

7k, rated M, M/M. Some sweet autistic 4 autistic love and affection with a build to the relationship and some fantastical elements on the side. Adapted from a TweetFic.

On Medium / / On Patreon

Fantasy Short: Luca's Monster

Cute fiction short! A boy talks to the monster that keeps coming out from under his bed.

1.2k, rated G. Sweet fantasy piece. Adapted from a TweetFic.

On Medium / / On Patreon

[tiikerikani]

I hate to be That Guy (who starts the queue)

(but somebody has to do it)

I'm trying to keep this brief because I need to sleep so I can do this again tomorrow.

2023.12.09 – Tavastia-klubi, Helsinki

It's cold. I decided to start hovering by the door at 5:15, though I'd already been standing around outside since 5. (Doors were at 6:30.) I can't feel my toes. Why am I like this???

Janne pops out and is going to the mall across the street (he returns later with a bag of food from the supermarket). He thanks me for the miniature and says it's "fabulous".

Senpai comes out carrying a backpack and says hi to me, then goes down the street the other way. I assume their hotel is over in that direction, as I saw three more band members exit carrying bags and going that way.

The space feels so small now, now that I've been to several newer and bigger clubs. I'm dead centre and I don't remember the barricade being so close to the stage in here. I can literally reach over and swipe a set list if I wanted to. When it's this close, being in the centre is no good for taking pictures of Senpai but that's okay today because I'm mostly trying to get more pictures to match my miniatures.

Leo's got an invisible microphone, lol :P

Senpai asks who's coming back tomorrow. A bunch of hands shoot up into the air. "IF ONLY WE COULD HAVE ACTUALLY GOTTEN TICKETS!" "YOU SHOULD DO A THIRD SHOW!!"

Yes my too-much-gesturing is 100% Senpai's fault

Too many of them wearing sneakers today

The Regular Groupies were talking to ... somebody who waves at me. "Hello!" she calls. It's her again!! "HOW DID YOU GET IN TO TAMPERE!??" I don't recall actually seeing her there last week but she'd have known because miniatures appeared there (and she's definitely Teemu's significant other, as the two of them left holding hands).

Janne says that "the set list is the same [tomorrow] but the atmosphere will be different". It won't be the first time I see them on a Sunday and yeah Sunday crowds are generally a bit more subdued.

I also asked him to suggest a song for me to learn next (with the caveat that I might not take it up). He named one of the old old songs; it's in the music book so I wouldn't have to work out the chords/melody. ("Have you learned all the songs from the book???" What, no :D ) He says it's fairly easy but still has interesting subtleties, and that he wrote it with Teemu so it's also, like, written on a piano and thus more playable on a piano.

"But if you want to do a new song..." he continues, "there's the one that we haven't performed yet? Don't remember the name, it goes like..." He's thinking of Jamesin takki and I think it's funny that I'm filling in the song title for him. "It'd be really challenging, I'd say it's the hardest song on the album. It has the modulation and it's in a difficult key...E-flat minor or something?" ("I'd transpose it, I'm lazy :D")

But oh no I know. It's the one that made me seriously reconsider my silly idea to learn the entire album on the piano, which I came up with before I listened to the whole thing.

Yeah I dunno about that song.

(Edit: I just checked my notes, it starts in F-sharp minor, which is much more reasonable. He was probably thinking of Ilman mua, which IS in E-flat minor and which, yes, I did transpose but could just as easily learn in the original key.)

I also think it's funny that they have to take all the equipment and the barricade and everything down just to put it all back up tomorrow. The equipment I understand, to keep it under lock and key, but I think the barricades come down so they can get the stuff out the door? Dunno.

I'm feeling lazy, here's the set list. (It is also on my arm as usual but I've had to come up with new symbols and I wasn't sure I'd remember what they meant by the time I got home.)

[Concert write-up archive and master calendar]

[anthonysstupiddailyblog]

Anthony's Stupid Daily Blog (533): Fri 1st Sep 2023

Before I went home early from work after using my five hours emergency holiday I was tracked down by someone from HR and was told that I still had a week's holiday that needed to be taken before the end of this month or it would disappear and I wouldn't be able to carry it over into the new year. I've already got the 19th, 20th, 21st, 26th, 27th and 28th as days off so I decided to put holiday dates in for the 22nd 23rd, 24th and 25th so that I can have a nice 10 day long holiday. I really wasn't planning on this since quite a lot of last month was spent essentially on holiday with two trips to Edinburgh and two trips to London as well but if a holiday needs to be taken then I might as well enjoy it. I know I said that I woudn't be leaving Sunderland any more this year but this 10 days off has given me the opportunity to have an actual holiday now. I might go to the town on my next day off to see if I can book a relatively cheap holiday somewhere nice and hot. I've been wanting to go on a solo holiday for a while now and this might be the perfect opportunity.

My experience in Edinburgh where I didn't have the balls to talk to the incredibly beautiful girl who did the show about wrestling has prompted me to do something about my lack of confidence. Since improving my body is completely out of the question since I love pizza and not doing exercise so much my only hope to get better at attracting women is to try and develop a great sense of humour. I've also wanted to attempt stand up comedy ever since I was a teenager but because I'm just as scared of audiences as I am individual people I haven't gotten round to doing this either…also I don't know how to write jokes which I'm led to believe are pretty much essential if you want to be a stand up comedian (unless you're Stewart Lee). In order to try to get better at writing jokes and being funnier in general I'm going to follow a piece of advice given to young comics by the great Jerry Seinfeld. When he was first starting out as a comic Seinfeld realized he needed to develop as many jokes / routines as possible in order to get better. Finding it hard to motivate himself to sit and write jokes he bought himself a calendar and every day that he wrote at least one joke he would cross off a day on the calendar. After a while he had a long string of red X's on the calendar and this motivated him to carry on in order to not "break the chain". I'm going to give this a try and I'll also take on board some advice from another comedian in Jim Jefferies who advises new comics to aim to write one minute per week of new material. I'm going to keep up this exercise for as long as my ADHD will let me and if I manage to make it a full year of writing at least one joke a day then I'm going to go to the first comedy club that does open mic events and give it a go. I won't be putting the jokes that I do come up with (if any) on this blog though because years ago I came up with a joke about Donald Trumps password onto Instagram and a few weeks later it turned up in a monologue on Frankie Boyle’s New World Order (He's clearly run out of disguises and can't get material by sitting at the back of Jerry Sadowitz gigs anymore so he's looking for gags elsewhere now).

[nyxicnymph]

I've been queer since before I was born.

When the doctors couldn't tell my parents what sex they thought I would be, when no one knew until the day I was born. And then they called me "girl".

I was queer when I was six, and didn't care about the things my mom thought I should. When I was too busy reading to worry about boys vs girls or anything beyond the next story.

I was queer when I was eleven and tucked my hair into my cap. When I asked my dad if he thought I looked like a boy, and when I felt upset when he said no. When I kept doing it, to the point that my mom made a rule that I couldn't wear my cap in the house.

I was queer when I was twelve and couldn't relate to other girls my age talking about different boys each week. When I'd been thinking of the same boy for years on end.

I was queer when I was 14 and a half, hiding in my closet reading the book club section in the back of my mom's edition of "Frankenstein". When I read how Shelley's parents didn't constrict or even care about her sex life. When I felt a longing feeling for that, before I quickly buried the emotion and slammed the book shut.

I was queer when I first got my phone at sixteen and a half, when I first read the terms "Gay", "Lesbian", "Trans", "Nonbinary" and "Bi". When my Puritanical upbringing screamed that it was wrong, and yet I kept coming back to the same memes.

I was queer when I made my Discord account, a few weeks before my 18th birthday. When I actually met other queer people through various servers, and began to learn more about the community.

I was queer when I was 18 and made my tumblr account. This Tumblr account. When I started digging into my own weird sexuality. When I discovered I was demisexual, and later, demiromantic.

I was queer when I shed my old name and nicknames due to panic. When I thought my dad would find out I used an even slightly different name online. When, for some reason, I decided to choose something completely different. When I finally chose "Nyx". When the people I shared my new name asked if there were other reasons for the name change, and when I said "No".

I was queer summer of last year when I asked my best friend if there was such a thing as gender envy over yourself. When they asked if I had something to share. When I said "No" again. And when I came back a few weeks later with a fire in my heart as I said that apparently there was. When I said I was a demigirl.

I was queer when I realized that I was equally okay with potentially being in monamorous or polyamorous relationships. When I thought back to when I was a kid watching tv shows and sometimes having more than one crush in a show.

And I was queer when I realized that label didn't fit me anymore, just a few months ago. When nothing else really changed but I started branching out more with the pronouns to a few people.

And I'm queer now, thinking back on my life so far, wondering how I never picked up on it. How I managed to be so wonderfully queer and not have it stomped out of me. And how it's possible that I might continue to have a wonderfully queer life.

[imerdwarf]

I've Given All I Can

Summary: You and Bucky feel as though you're pulling apart from each other, your worse fears come true one night at a party but is it too late?

Warnings: Low self esteem, angst, language, Bucky is an idiot, tears, heartbreak, implied smut (but nothing explicit) at the end 💜

Author's Notes: Happy evening 😍 this is for @the-ss-horniest-book-club's Drunk Drabbles 💜

Bucky has that unreadable look in his eyes again as he watches you change clothes. Your jeans feel too tight around your waist and your shirts pull across your stomach, accentuating the bulge from your food baby from all the binge eating junk you've eaten the past few weeks to help you feel better.

In truth, eating like that made you feel worse about yourself. You thought of yourself as the worst human alive because you couldn't stop it, you couldn't stop anything from going wrong with your body and your mind was in overdrive.

Your self esteem issues were eating away at you, you felt helpless as if you were screaming into a void alone and nobody was around to help you. Your mind would play the cruelest tricks. For example, how your mind would pick up on the facial expressions your boyfriend Bucky would give other women in the compound. He looks at them how he used to look at you when you first started dating, and it's been a while since you have seen that look from him.

For Bucky it was completely the opposite though, he's felt this distance between the two of you for a while and figured it was because you weren't interested in him anymore. He knows of the stress you've been under, how your insecurities are eating away at your thoughts and he longs for the day he sees your beautiful smile again.

He just knows it won't happen anytime soon and quite frankly, he doesn't even know what he should do anymore. Trying to talk to you was impossible because you would only grunt in response or not pay any attention to what he was asking or you would just change subjects which has been the case lately.

He doesn't know what do to, he wishes you would just tell him what he needs to do to make you love him again. He stares blankly at you as you change into jeans and a sweater, making no attempt to look away when you catch his stare and that look on his face.

Bucky stands and leaves you alone in the room, the door closes behind him and it's then the waterworks come to life. Tears roll freely down your cheeks as you crumble to the floor, hugging your knees to your chest, you rock back and forth feeling your heart break in your chest. You would give anything to have Bucky wrap his arms around you right now, it just seems he feels disgusted being near you and touching you.

While you were crying in your shared room, Bucky made his way to the kitchen where he saw Sam sitting on the stool sipping a coffee and scrolling through some files on the glass tablet.

"Rough mission?" Bucky asks, taking a seat opposite him and playing with the strings on his sweatpants.

"You could say that," Sam coughs into his bent elbow and looks over at Barnes to notice that worrying look in his eyes, "what's wrong?" He adds with a frown.

"Nothin'" Bucky sighs and runs a hand over his face. He looks tired and almost defeated.

"Come on man, I'm good for some things ya know!" Sam chuckles to encourage the man.

"It's just me and Y/N, things aren't... so good lately, feel like we're drifting apart." Bucky sniffles, saying it out loud was almost reality.

"Well, as your friend, I would advise you to sit down and talk about things, tell each other what's on your mind and hug it out even." Sam has a point but he doesn't understand that Bucky has tried to talk to you about this in the past and got nowhere. Now you were barely speaking.

"It's not that simple Sam," Bucky sighs and shakes his head.

Now it's Sam's turn to sigh, "nothing ever is simple. Just act like an adult and talk like adults, it's gonna be alright, man! Anyway, I got to go. I have a support group to motivate, let me know how things go." Sam grabs his backpack from the stool next to him and leaves quickly, leaving Bucky to think over his irrational plan that he thinks might work.

1 week later

Tonight is the night of one of Stark's extravagant parties and everyone is invited. It's also the night Bucky has a plan that he wants to execute to hopefully bring the two of you back together again.

He stands in front of the floor length mirror and adjusts his bowtie for the umpteenth time. His black suit is tailored to fit him perfectly and he knows how much you love him in black.

Your own dress was a gift from Natasha. It showed a lot of cleavage and thigh, normally, a dress like this was not something you would have chosen.

And by the time you got downstairs to the party, the room was already crowded ranging from the less fortunate to the billionaires. You had to shimmy past a couple of people to reach the bar, you were hoping your dress might spark some interest from Bucky tonight but he's nowhere to be seen.

You take a seat on the barstool and order a martini, the bartender hands you the drink and you thank him with a smile, spinning on your seat to sip your drink and scan the room. A boisterous laugh grabs your attention and your eyes follow the offensive sound. Your eyes narrow in on the gorgeous blonde standing in the corner, but it's the man she's with that makes your heart drop into your stomach.

It's Bucky. And her hands are holding onto his biceps as he presumably tells her one of his jokes. He's smiling, he's laughing and it's the happiest you have seen him for a while. Was he miserable because of you? Were you holding him back from happiness? The scene unfolding was answering all of your questions and more when Bucky takes her hand in his and pulls her to the dance floor to dance alongside the other 'couples'. They look so happy and so lost in each others eyes that your eyes well up and the room feels like it's closing in and suffocating you.

You can't breath, you need air and fast. You slam your glass down on the bar and stand up, taking off your heels so you can get out of here even quicker. You don't excuse yourself as you barge past the happy smiling attendees.

Wanda sees everything unfold from where she was stood. She saw the way Barnes had approached the blonde woman and started flirting with her as soon as you arrived at the party. She also sees he's none the wiser of the fact you've already left the scene upset and heartbroken.

Wanda approaches the blind idiot and pulls him away from the woman he's with. "what the -"

"I could ask you the same question Barnes! What the hell do you think you're playing at? You're cheating on Y/N now? My best friend?" Wanda is seething, and the urge to punch the smirk of his face is harder to resist.

"Did it work?" He asks with a smug grin looking around the party.

"Oh yeah, if your plan was to break her heart and make her cry, it worked perfectly!"

Bucky frowns and his lip quivers slightly, "nononono! That wasn't the plan! Fuck, where did she go?"

"Who knows." Wanda shrugs, she wouldn't tell him even if she did.

Bucky rushes past her and starts to look in every room until he finds you slouched against the wall of one of the vacant offices down the hall.

"Baby!" Bucky rushes in and kneels next to you, his big arms immediately pull you into his chest. You try to pull away but his grip is too strong and you end up sobbing uncontrollably into his chest. "I'm so sorry baby."

You pull your face away to breathe, your palms flat against his chest, "you're leaving me," you croak, looking up at him through wet eyelashes. The room around you feels like it's spinning, this feels like a really bad dream.

Bucky staggers for a moment, digging his fingertips further into your flesh. "Absolutely not baby! No way! I'm so sorry you gotta believe me doll, I was just trying to make you jealous because I thought you weren't interested in me anymore and-"

"I thought you weren't interested in me!" You argue, fighting back the fresh tears threatening to fall, "you haven't touched me in so long I didn't know what to think."

"Then it's my fault doll, I read the whole situation wrong and I should have talked to you like an adult, please let me make it up to you and I promise I'll show you just how much I love you and want to touch you." His nose nudges against yours and his face dips slightly to capture your lips. His lips are soft and you quietly moan into his mouth as he spins you both around and presses you up against the door ready to make good on his promise.

Taglist: @smokeybluebrooke-lyn @pinkdiamond1016 @whatrambles @bestofbucky @ladyeliot

[cafeacademia]

Love Between The Pages | Chapter 3

Blaise Zabini x Reader

Chapter Summary: You and Blaise enjoy an afternoon in the warmth of spring with your book club, the two of you becoming closer and your mind terribly aware that it might all end with the end of his detention.

Warnings: Nothing, just fluff, very soft chapter, a tiny bit of romance.

Word count: Approx 2000

A/N: Hi loves, here's the third chapter!! I had initially intended to include a mildly angsty scene in this chapter, but I just couldn't fit it in and maintain the soft vibes I've been going for with this series. I hope you enjoy none the less! The next part will be the last full part and then it'll be followed up by a little epilogue!

The warm afternoon sun and a light, cool breeze made the grounds the perfect spot to enjoy the hour. It was warm, but not too hot and neither was it cold. “If we go a bit further down, we can hear the lake.” Neville said over his shoulder to the rest of the group as Theo walked along beside him, everyone happily following Neville closer to the lake shore.

“It’s pretty out here, isn’t it?” Cho asked, looking over at Draco who just sort of shrugged at her. “It’s alright I suppose.” He replied. “Oh shut up, we all know you like it, you can admit it.” Ginny teased, the girls giggling at the way Draco playfully rolled his eyes at them, too amused to really be mad.

“It really is nice out here.” You said, glancing up at Blaise as you walked next to each other, a little behind the others. “I can’t believe you never thought of it.” He chuckled. And Blaise had been right, it would be lovely to read out in the afternoon sun on a warm spring day, with a gentle breeze and the lapping of the lake against the shore. The birds flitting about added to the ambience, along with the distant cheer and laughter coming from the quidditch practice that was taking place in the distance, the odd giggle and shriek of laughter bringing the grounds to life as a group of first years bounded down to see Hagrid.

Following the others down, you felt the soft brush of Blaise’s hand against yours, the back of his fingers trailing over yours. It made butterflies blossom in your chest, your heart flipping as you glanced down at his gentle touch. Looking up at him, flustered and shy, you could barely look him in the eyes and you hoped, at least for a moment that he didn’t notice what he did to you, that he didn’t realise what kind of feelings you felt when his hand touched yours like that.

Was this more than just a little crush, you wondered. Was it more than just attraction when you thought of someone nearly all the time? Their voice on your mind, their mannerisms and things they would say playing in your mind over and over. Perhaps it was more.

“Here’s a good spot.” Neville sighed contentedly as he pulled his bag off his shoulders and placed it down on the grass below a tree before lowering himself onto the grass, his actions pulling you out of your little daze and your hand parted from Blaise’s.

Theo sat next to Neville, the pair having slowly become more friendly with each other over their interest in Herbology and books. And who would have known that Theodore Nott had an interest in Herbology, had it not been for Neville who saw it in him? Theo seemed to admire Neville’s attentiveness to character, seemed to admire his kind, nurturing nature. Perhaps that was what drew him towards the Gryffindor, and gave him the patience to give the friendship a chance.

Settling down next to Blaise beneath a tree, you pulled your copy of The Hobbit into your lap as he got himself comfortable, leaning back against the old oak tree. “The Hobbit, have you read it before?” Blaise asked as he looked over your shoulder, your eyes going wide with excitement. “Once, yes.” You nodded. “Have you read Little Women too?” He asked as he lifted the copy of Little Women he had borrowed from the library. “I’ve read that too.” You smiled shyly, looking down at your book. “I think it’s nice, it’s sweet actually.” Blaise replied. “What do you mean?” It came out quieter than expected, but not so quiet he hadn’t heard you. “That you read so much, that you know the muggle fiction in the library so well.” He chuckled softly.

Blaise often forgot that your upbringing had not been like his. While he was brought up with the reality of his abilities and those around him, you were unbeknown to the world of witchcraft and wizardry. For you, it was only being alive in the books you read, it was nothing but a fantasy to you. Sometimes he wished he had lived like you, in innocence growing up with nothing more thrilling than a muggle book to delve into, with fantasies he could not fathom. He wondered what it was like when you found out you were a witch and to have the fantasies of magic suddenly become a reality for you too.

Looking over at you, Blaise found himself unable to look away. It was the way you lazily propped yourself up against the tree beside him, one hand on the page of your book while the other gently slid between the soft blades of grass, your fingers idly trailing gently over daisy heads that bloomed beneath the tree. It was the late afternoon light that cast a golden glow over you, highlighting your beauty in every way.

Perhaps it was the way his heart fluttered or the light airy feeling he got when you smiled at him. Or perhaps it was the way you shone so brightly for someone who was so shy and quiet. Whatever it was, a thought crossed his mind in that moment, one he knew only as fact. She has stolen my heart.

It was then that you looked up from your book, having felt his gaze on you. He met your eyes with a flash of embarrassment before he gave you his lopsided charming smile that never seemed to fail in melting you.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" You asked softly.

"Like what?" Blaise countered.

"Like you're-." In love. You stopped yourself, the words unable to roll off your tongue. What if it wasn't love? What if it was just curiosity?

"Like I'm what?" Blaise prompted, his fingers reaching across the grass and gently brushing against yours, rising the warmth through you again. It was confusing, yet exhilarating and so sweet all at the same time.

The words played on your lips, tangible yet out of reach. They clung to you. What if it wasn't love?

"Nothing, I just meant..." You trailed off.

But as you questioned it, you wondered more now; what if it was love?

Between the longing gazes, the need to be near each other, the soft barely there touches and the way you both naturally seemed to look for each other in a room. Maybe it was love.

But as the comfortable silence took over and Blaise gazed at you with a soft smirk, he realised he didn’t need the answer. He knew what you were going to say, what was sitting on the tip of your tongue, too shy to be put into words.

Instead of trying to pry words from you or formulate the ones he was not sure he could just yet, Blaise gently slid his fingers through the soft blades of grass, his fingertips lightly brushing over the back of your hand. You looked up at him, a sweet expression about you, somewhere between curiosity and something flustered, wanting. It was soft, the way he took your hand in his, gentle and sweet as if he thought he might hurt you with the slightest movement, his fingers gently grasping your hand in his, resting in the cool grass.

You gazed up at him, eyes full of something, but they told him everything. The gentle lap of the water on the lake shore, the soft chatter of the birds in the trees and the way the breeze rustled through the leaves. The fresh spring scent, it smelled of green, of flowers, of fresh water. It was the light salt smell of the silt that collected on the bank, the woody scent of the tree that you both leaned against. And then there was the feeling, the feeling Blaise brought you, the butterflies that fluttered through you at the way he smiled, the way he gazed at you as if you were the only one there.

You read like that for a while, with your book in your lap, one hand turning the pages while your other was resting in Blaise’s gentle grasp, his thumb lightly tracing over the back of your hand, your fingers adjusting around his hand now and again, relaxing and becoming more comfortable with the soft touch.

And even when the low toll of the clock tower bell rang to signal the turn of the hour, accompanied by the soft shuffling of pages and clothes against grass, the quiet chatter of your friends as they gathered their things together, you stayed together for a moment longer.

“Come on, I’ll walk you back to your common room.” Blaise suggested as he pulled away from you, putting his book away. And even though you could have spent the whole night out in the grounds by his side, you knew you could not. It would soon be time for dinner and after that you knew you had other things you needed to do before tomorrow for class. “I’d like that.” You nodded, reaching for your bag and tucking your book away.

Blaise got to his feet first, throwing his bag over his shoulder before he held out both of his hands to help you up. And you gently placed your hands in his, letting him help you to your feet, his gentle touch not leaving yours for a moment, even after you were standing.

Taking your bag and adjusting it on your shoulders, you began to walk side by side, your friends having already started walking back up the grounds towards the stone circle. “Last week is your last meeting with us.” You sighed, intending it not to sound as if you were as disappointed as you felt, but Blaise heard the way it hurt to say it out loud, the longing hope that it might not end, especially not so soon. “And we’ll make it the best, won’t we?” Blaise gently nudged your arm. “I suppose we will.” You nodded as you both continued up the hill, your mind thinking up all manner of ideas of what you could do for the last meeting the boys were there for.

You didn’t want them to leave. Of course at first you had been thinking the same as Ginny had said, it felt as if you were the ones being punished for the boys attacking your group. But it quickly became apparent that perhaps the book club was just as much of a safe space for the boys as it was for you and your friends. And you hoped at least, that they liked it enough to stay after their last meeting, but there was no way you could know for sure and part of you was afraid to ask.

You heard a joyful shriek of laughter as you passed through the stone circle, looking up ahead to see Draco and Ginny laughing with their heads thrown back about something that Theo had said, Cho unable to stop herself from giggling. It made you smile. Perhaps it wouldn’t be the same without the boys if they left, at least you felt like something would be missing.

And as you walked up the steps towards your common room, your hands brushing together, fingers linking gently and soft glances cast between you, you became lost in your thoughts.

“What’s on your mind, sweetheart?” Blaise asked as you both stopped outside of the common room door, his breath catching in his throat at the accidental use of the name. It was true though, you were a sweetheart in every sense of the word, darling, kind, gentle, quiet. There was no other word to describe you the way Blaise wanted to. Meeting his gaze, your smile reaching your eyes with a loving warmth, you shook your head. “Nothing at all.” You lied. He didn’t believe you, but he didn’t mind, they weren’t his to be shared. “Alright, I’ll see you around then.” Blaise smiled, gently squeezing your hand. “Yes,” You paused, the thought again on your mind. What if it wasn’t love? “See you later.” Were your last words before your hands parted and you took one last look at Blaise before you turned away to walk towards the Ravenclaw common room door. And you wondered again; what if it was love?

Blaise Zabini Taglist (OPEN):

@paintballkid711 @megantje123 @chaotic-fae-queen @slytherinwh0re @frecklesandfirecrackers @starofthedawn @mingyuahjumma @dracosaccount @90smalfoy @fuckingdraco @loving-life-my-way @cpetrova @miraclesoflove @struggling-bee @weasleywhore @little-me204 @dreaming-about-fanfictions @eli-malfoy-asf @ur-local-reality-shifter @voidmalfoy @wh0re4blaise @cherie-draco @lazypeachsoul @sistheselenophile @sw33tgirl

[karlajoyner]

Stressed Out (Sunset Curve x Reader)

A/n: So starting off I've made a master list that I'm posting real soon for you all to access my stories without the scrolling. In order to post it I have to update my post about my requests/taglist and soon because I do get a lot on that comments that ask for more Charlie or more Owen and I wanna give you guys that but I also wanna make sure that I get through the requests that you guys send me with plots and storylines. It just makes it like a thousand times easier to have something to work off of. Opposed to me coming up with my own storylines that I have to do a lot of reading on my own to get my gears working! But again thank you guys for the comments! And finally I wanna say thank you for sending in your requests and your feed back. It is much appreciated!

Disclaimer: Alex is bi in this one not taking away from the fact that he's gay in the show it just runs best for this storyline! There is no Bobby btw! Haven’t written a foursome with 3 guys before so it might suck ass. And it’s not much but it’s something so enjoy my fellow fantoms!

Warnings: Smut (18+)

————

I internally groaned walking into school. I wasn't the worst student. But by far I certainly was not the best. Which is why I had a reputation since I first arrived to high school.

That and I was in a band with 3 of my best friends. Who all happened to be guys. Hot guys at that.

Which automatically made me the schools slut. It was fine with me but the boys didn't like the label.

No matter how true it was.

"Hey y/n heard you gave Mike Dawson a blowjob this weekend. Just when I thought you couldn't be anymore of a slut"

"Mind your fucking business Hayley" I heard a familiar voice speak up for me. A smirk spreading on my face as I felt an arm wrap around my shoulder.

"Did she come to you right after Patterson? What's it like to be her sloppy seconds?" Hayley Becker spoke with a wicked evil smirk plastered on her face.

"Fucking amazing actually. God the long nights we have. It's so great" I heard another familiar voice from my left. A large hand intertwining my fingers with theirs. She rolled her eyes clearly not expecting my boys to speak up for me. But then again neither was I.

"Slut"

"Skank"

"Whore"

"Bitch" I spoke as the bell rang.

"Just watch your back y/l/n" She said before turning around and walking away.

"She will!" Reggie shouted after the dark haired girl. The three of us expectantly looking at our bandmate.

"What? I didn't even get to tell her we would too" I sighed shaking my head at the boy.

"Thanks for sticking up for me guys but I can do that myself"

"We know. But your our girl. And apart of this band so we're kinda obligated" Alex spoke as the four of us walked to first period.

"Your really not"

"Come on y/n you know we're still gonna do it"

"I know and I only let you today cause I can't deal with that bitch at this time of day. I mean seriously it's 8:00 o'clock in the morning. Does she not have anything better to do than spread rumors about me?"

"Apparently not. So you and Jake Mills behind the church?" Reggie asked.

"Didn't happen considering I was with you idiots all weekend. You know your the only guys I touch" I bit my lip hearing the three of them chuckle.

"Yeah well it better stay that way. I don't wanna hear Trevor O'Connor bragging about banging you in the boys locker room again"

"Schools golden boy?" I questioned.

"He tried starting the rumor yesterday during p.e but we quickly shut it down" Reggie explained as I stopped a few feet away from the science room to continue talking.

"So Hayleys boyfriend wants to bang me? Wow"

"Yeah but don't even fucking thing about" Luke said pushing me up against the lockers beside us.

"I wasn't. Unless you guys piss me off" I grinned pushing him off of me. Opening the door a few feet away and walking in.

"Gentlemen. And Ms. y/l/n. Your late"

"Sorry Mrs. Daniels we had to deal with something"

"And did this something give you tardy passes"

"It did not"

"Detention. All of you"

"That's nothing new to them Mrs. Daniels"

"Shut the fuck up Hayley" I scoffed taking my seat beside Alex.

"Ladies stop it before I send you to the principal"

"Yes Mrs. Daniels" Hayley and I spoke in sync.

"I can't believe Luke dated her" I whispered towards Alex glaring at the blonde bimbo.

"Jealous?"

"Why would I be? I already have him. And I could have her boyfriend too if I wanted him" I said taking down the notes on the board.

"Mrs. Daniels I can't focus on the lesson because they're distracting me with their talking" Hayley spoke pointing an accusing finger at us.

"We are not!" I shouted sitting up.

"Yes you are probably talking about who your gonna whore around with next"

"Yeah it's your boyfriend if you don't check yourself Hayley"

"Trevor would never do that!"

"I'm pretty sure he would"

"Ladies principal office right now" I scoffed standing up.

"Wait!" Luke shouted standing up. Everyone's heads whipping toward him. He made his way over to me groping my left boob.

I scowled at how hard he squeezed glaring at him.

"Dickhead" I muttered.

"Mr. Patterson! You too principals office" We looked at the other two boys expectantly. Alex immediately rolling his eyes before standing up.

"We could do this the easy way or the hard way Mrs. Daniels"

"If she goes we go"

"I cannot send you two away for absolutely no reason Reginald" Mrs. Daniels spoke challenging the boys.

I close my eyes preparing myself for what came next. Alex was quick to slap my ass while Reggie pulled me in for a sweet kiss. Immediately earning gasps from my classmates.

"Now I can do it. Office all of you! And detention today after school!"

I groaned walking out of the principals office with my bandmates.

"Detention for 3 weeks. Seriously?"

"To make it worse we have to spend 2 of those with Hayley" I spoke seeing the blonde talking with Trevor just a few feet away. Being sure to send them a harsh glare, I finally turned back to the boys.

"Hey you'll be with us everything's gonna be fine" Reggie said throwing an arm around my shoulder leading me away to our next period. That we conveniently had together.

"No it won't. I also have to chaperone the stupid homecoming with Hayley" I cried wanting nothing more than for the day to be done for.

That afternoon we spent in detention not leaving until late afternoon. Due to the fact that my detention went on longer than the boys.

I walked into the studio behind Luke not really in the mood to practice.

"What's wrong y/n/n? You seem down" Reggie asked as I plopped back onto the couch.

"I'm just tired is all. And a little stressed out"

"But we've gotta practice baby, for our next gig. Sunset Curves so gonna rock that book club" Luke said picking up his six string. I watched as Alex and Reggie sent him a glare, the boy immediately putting it back down.

"Or we could take a day off" He spoke coming to sit to my left while Reggie was on my right.

"That sounds amazing" I mumbled feeling Alex begin to massage my shoulders from behind. I craned my neck allowing him more access. Now feeling a little more relaxed than before.

"So tell us y/n/n why are you stressed out?" Luke asked as I shut my eyes.

"Well for starters I'm so gonna get my ass beat when I get home" I sighed feeling Reggie begin to rub my arm to comfort me. Something he did often with how anxious I got.

"And there's just nothing I want to do more than run your ex girlfriend over with a bulldozer" I mumbled hearing a chuckle escape their lips.

"Sounds like a plan" Alex said as Luke intertwined our fingers.

"We'll make a day out of it. Just us four and a bulldozer" He joked making me giggle. The laugh got caught in my throat as I felt a soft kiss on the side of my neck.

"Seriously guys? Not today. No way" I spoke opening my eyes.

"We just wanna help you relax"

"That's what you said last time. I couldn't walk right for 2 days" I mumbled the last part.

"We'll be gentle" Reggie spoke.

"I know you will Reg. It's them I'm worried about" I spoke earning a pointed look from Alex.

"Okay Luke"

"Am I that rough?" He asked a frown forming on his face.

"Sometimes" I admitted feeling a little bad.

"Gee I'm sorry baby" Luke spoke kissing the back of my hand.

"It's okay. I like it when I'm in the mood" I said watching as Alex walked around the couch.

"Well then boys why don't we help our girl relax for today" Alex said bending down in front of me. I bit my lip as he spread my legs open feeling a slight breeze hit my covered core.

"Well there's no need for your skirt or these" Alex spoke toying with the waistbands of both my skirt and panties.

I shimmied out of them with ease leaving me exposed to my best friends like I'd been many times before.

"She just gets prettier every time"

"And wetter"

"Mind if I taste baby?" Luke asked. I nodded my head, watching as he dipped his long fingers in between my folds. Moaning as he pulled them back up to see them glistening with my cum.

"So good" He whispered putting them in his mouth.

"Okay I want a taste now" Alex said opening my legs a little wider.

"Guys. A little help" I huffed as Luke and Reggie hooked themselves on each of my thighs to keep me still.

"Please" I begged getting more turned on by the second. The blonde didn't hesitate to latch onto my core. A loud moan escaping my lips.

"Oh fuck" I struggled to keep still as he moved his tongue skillfully through my folds. Lapping it inside and out as moans fell from my lips.

I whimpered as Reggie slowly began to rub my clit making the pleasure intensify.

"Use y-you're f-fingers" I mustered out Alex obeying my request sticking two fingers in my wet pussy. Picking up the pace. My eyes screwed shut as a familiar feeling of bliss coursed through me.

"Look at me baby" Luke muttered turning my head to look at him with his free hand. I opened my eyes looking into his blue ones covered with complete lust.

He was quick to smash his lips onto mine as the other two worked on building up my orgasm. Which wasn't far at the pace Alex was working on me.

"Holy shit!" I panted pulling away and throwing my head back at the amazing sensation of my orgasm hitting.

"You squirted princess" Alex grinned wiping away the liquids dribbling down his chin. I giggled at his swollen pink lips placing a quick peck to them.

"What now baby?" Luke asked rubbing his hand on my thigh.

I looked at the three boys before discarding any remaining clothes I had left. Watching as their eyes raked me up and down like many times before.

"Reg can you just fuck me today. I really need gentle" I begged as his cheeks turned bright red whenever I asked him to do something. Whether it was sexual or not.

"Sure beautiful" He smiled lopsidedly pushing his lips onto mine.

I sighed in content as he pushed me down on the couch. My head landing on Luke's lap giving me a little leverage.

"She's something else" Alex spoke to no one in particular.

"Your telling me" Reggie panted pulling away to undo his belt and jeans. I bit my lip looking up at the boy with the blue eyes. Who no surprise had a smirk plastered on his face.

"Condom" I heard Alex say presumably to Reggie. But I was too entrance in Luke's gaze wanting to include him. Upon hearing a ripping of a package I glance back at the boy who was hovering above me.

"I can do something for you after if you want" I bit my lip speaking towards Luke.

"It's okay baby. It's about you today" He said moving his hand down from my collarbone to my boob.

Reggie and I moaned simultaneously as he slowly entered me. Immediately stretching me out.

"So tight" He muttered beginning to move at a steady pace.

A squeal escaping my lips as Luke pinched my nipples paying close attention to each of them. He'd always been a boob guy.

I pulled Reggie down towards me our lips meeting in the middle as his speed began to increase.

Then there they were again. Fingers were now rubbing circles on my clit presumably Alex's sending my body into pure ecstasy.

I moaned loudly into Reggies mouth as I felt myself my inner walls clench around him. Earning a groan from the bassist. His thrust becoming more sloppy.

"Shit. Shit. Oh fuck" He cursed as his orgasm hit. Mine coming seconds after.

"Holy fuck Reg" I panted coming down from my high.

"That was pretty fucking hot princess" Alex spoke as Reggie got off of me to go throw away the condom.

"I try" I joked sitting up. Luke immediately removing his muscle tee and handing it to me.

"You do know this isn't gonna cover much up right?" I questioned him putting it on anyway.

"Who said we wanted you to cover up baby" He said pulling me under his arm. I sighed contently placing my hands on his bare torso.

"Anyways Reg why don't you go run her a bath inside the house" Alex suggested throwing me my panties that had been thrown onto the lazy boy.

"Got it!" Reggie said coming over and placing a chaste kiss to my lips before running out of the garage.

"I get to clean her up in the shower. Called it" Luke said as Alex wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Just as long as I get to put her to bed"

"Guys I've orgasmed twice today give me a break"

"Are you feeling more relaxed princess?"

Alex asked grinning at me.

"Much. Now if we could do that consistently for the next 2 weeks then I might be able to get through detention with Hayley without ripping her head off" I spoke earning a laugh from the two boys. Both of them knowing well that I wasn't joking.

————

Up Next: Carrie Wilson x Reader

Owen Patrick Joyner x Reader

Charlie Gillespie x Reader

Alex x Male Reader

Luke Patterson x Reader

Charlie Gillespie x Reader

————

@lolychu @headheartbellarke @bookish0918 @kcd15 @ifilwtmfc @moviesbooksandfandoms @lovesanimals @lavender-writer @kaitieskidmore1 @morganayennefertyrell @iloveteenwolf @ghostofmgg

[lizziestudieshistory]

Books of 2021 - September TBR: Magical Readathon edition

(AKA. Lizzie has gone mad!)

It's my last month of relative freedom before the last year of my masters begins in October, so I wanted to make the most of my time rather than just doss about on my phone for another month. As such I decided to do the Magical Readathon, hosted by G from Book Roast on Booktube, to make me read. However, because I'm a chronic overachiever, instead of picking out prompts I wanted to do I'm trying to read for all of them. Someone needs to restrain me at this point!

Anyway, here's the books:

The Novice Path Entrance: read a book with a map - Oathbringer by Brandon Sanderson

Already a bad start for a readathon... I’m getting back into the mood for high/epic fantasy and I need to finish my rereads of both these books. I’m currently in the mood for Oathbringer, mainly because I’ve been catching up with Shardcast and finishing my Words of Radiance review. However, I REALLY want to reread Rhythm of War now we’re almost a year on from its release, but I need to reread Oathbringer first.

I do want to say I might give myself a pass and say if I’ve read half of Oathbirnger I’m counting it as a success because these books are MASSIVE and I’ve got a few other tomes on this list!

Ashtorn Tree: a book that keeps tempting you (or top of your TBR) - Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie

This is where posting your tbr a week into the month gets awkward... I’ve already finished Peter Pan. However, I read this in one of my whims to read a book with Captain Hook in it, usually I veer off into a retelling but it was time to read the origninal book. I’d not read Peter Pan before, and I keep feeling the urge and surpressing it. (Should have kept doing it because the book really hasn’t aged well...!)

The Mist of Solitude: read a standalone - Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray*

Another bad choice... I’ve wanted to read this book for ages, I’d meant to start it earlier this year, and I’m buddy reading it with a friend. I need to read it now and it definitely fits this prompt. I do really love Vanity Fair as a story - both the film and miniseries are FABULOUS - so I’m excited to get into the book...it’s just 900 pages!

Much like Oathbringer I might give myself a pass if I read over half the book and say I’ve completed the prompt!

*I've left my physical copy at my Nan's like a prize idiot so I couldn't include it in the photo...

Ruin of the Skye: read a book featuring ghosts/hauted house, or other supernatural elements - The Turn of the Screw by Henry James

Oops another one I’ve already finished. This is the only ghost story I own that I haven’t read, it’s also short (thank God!) However, I really don’t like ghost stories... It showed in my reading experience.

Obsidian Falls: read a thriller or mystery - Jamaica Inn by Daphne du Maurier

This is another genre I don’t read a lot from, I’ll read the occassional mystery through dark academia or Agatha Christie but I can’t even think of a thriller I’ve read recently! However, Jamaica Inn is my book club read for September so I’ve got to read it and the quotes on the book says it’s a classic thriller

Tower of Rumination: read a five star prediction - Malice by John Gwynne

I rarely predict 5 star reads, that last book I remember picking up thinking ‘this will be a 5 star read’ was The Way of Kings, which I read 5 years ago... However, I do have high hopes for this one? Honestly, this is the book I’m most likely to switch out for something else depending on my mood later in the month.

Orilium Academy Arc: a book with a school setting - Etiquette and Espionage by Gail Carriger

I needed a book I know is going to be a quick read at this point, I also really want to revisit the Finishing School series because I read the whole series in about 4 days! I also want to have a small refresher before Carriger’s next book in the Delightfully Deadly series comes out next month, which is a sequel about one of the sidecharacters introduced in this book. It’s also a fun, fast paced, YA adventure about victorian girls at a school for spies - what more could you want?!

I’m tentatively throwing Measure for Measure by Shakespeare onto the pile because it’s left over from last month - but no promises because there’s already A LOT. I also needed to finish Emma at the start of the month, so that added on abotu 200 pages!

[pixie88]

Christmas Shopping

Chapter 3 - Addicted to you.  

A/N: It felt so weird writing/editing this chapter in the middle of summer, but that’s how their timeline worked out! I can’t remember the last time I released a H&L chapter or wrote one to be fair, I think after this I have 2 more in drafts. Better get back to it! I hope you like it 😘  

Tagging those who asked to be tagged but if you want to be added let me know!

Read previous chapters HERE!

Warnings: Fluff & NSFW

Songs: Kelly Rowland - Commander, Rihanna - Only girl, Magic - Rude & Wyclef Jean - Perfect gentleman.

Word Count: 2673

Pairings: Laila x Harry

Enjoy! 😘  

A couple days later.

"So what are you going to get Harry for Christmas?" Nikki asks her as they had taken a break from shopping to have some lunch. "I have no idea what to get him!" she sighs. "I'm sure he'll be happy with you in some sexy lingerie," Nikki winks at her Laila lets out a loud laugh making people turn to look at her. "Or you can get him a Santa costume?" she laughs.

"What are you getting Stu?" Laila changes the subject. "He wants a new aftershave, I can't remember what he normally wears. What does Harry wear?" Laila has a think "Erm...a few different ones really Paco Rabanne One Million, Davidoff cool water, Boss Bottle that one what's his face is in the advert....the guy that plays Thor. Is one he smelt recently and liked but he didn't get it because they sold out and only had the sample bottle."

"You can get him that! I might have a sniff to see if it's something Stu would wear too!"

After lunch, they are walking through the shopping centre, Nikki ended up getting Stu some aftershave. Laila was still unsure what to get Harry, so Nikki drags her into Ann Summers. "What about these??" Nikki holds up some fluffy handcuff, Laila snorts. "We already have some, but without the fluff!" Nikki puts down the cuffs "What about cock ring? Closest Harry will get to sticking a ring on it!"

"We have that too," Laila blushes. "Crotch less knickers?" Laila nods signalling she has those. "Weighted love ball?" she asks and Laila again nods. "Feather tickler?" nod, "Blind fold? Riding crop?" Laila again nods, "Jeez, it would be easier to ask what you haven't got!" the pair laugh, "What? It has been eight years remember!" Laila winks at her.

"What about anal beads or ball gag?" Laila pulls a disgusted face "Finally! What about nipple clamps?" Laila laughs, "Only if they're being used on him!" she laughs. "God! Just think 6 months ago you were a born again virgin...now look at you! Getting more action than all of us put together!" Nikki giggles "Just over 7 months actually!" Laila corrects her.

Laila's phone Pings.

"Nikki! Look what Harry has done to Mabel!" she hands her the phone. "Awwww! Laila how adorable do she look!" the pair coo over the photo. "Has she met her new dog walker yet?" Nikki asks as she hands back the phone "She's met her, she's actually taking her out today." she smiles.

They ended up leaving the shop with some Christmas theme lingerie.

Later.

Laila arrives home all the lights are out "Harry?" Laila calls out. "I'm in the living room!" he calls back, she hangs up her coat and makes her way across the hall. When she opens the living room door the room is lit with tea and fairy lights, there are blankets and cushions on the floor in front of the coffee table. On the coffee table there is a chocolate fondue with fruit and marshmallows next to it "Aww Bear! What's all this?" she wanders over to him on the floor. "Where's Mabel?" she looks round the room as she sits next to him.

"She's gone to bed, Nessa took her for a 2 mile walk today!" he cups her face pulling her in for a soft kiss. "Aww, are they getting on OK?" he smiles, "Yeah, I've booked her in for Monday to Friday this week coming about lunchtime, so you'll met her this week."

"Right, enough about this dog walker. Are you going to let me feed you?" she winks, he leans forward grabbing a strawberry and hands it to her. She dips it into the chocolate and guilds it towards his lips, he's just about to take a bite when she redirects it to her mouth and takes a bite. He laughs and reaches over and pulls her lips to his. His tongue swirls with hers tasting the chocolate covered strawberry, he pulls away "That was amazing!" he grins at her.

She grabs another strawberry covers it in chocolate and traces it against his pulse line. Her tongue follows the same path, he groans and his breathing hitches as she pulls away she places the strawberry against his lips, he takes a bite. His lips brush over her finger tips making her every nerve ending stand on end. He knows the affect he has on her "How was that?" 

"Tasty!" he grins and winks at her "Your turn." he picks up a marshmallow covers it in chocolate holds it out for her to bite into it. "Hmmm..!" she smiles at him "Did you get all your shopping done?"

"I need to order a couple of bits online, but after that..I'm done."

"Christmas day, what are we doing?" he asks.

She sighs, "I don't know how we are going to split between them all!" she leans against him and his arm comes around her. "I have an idea....as it's our first Christmas together, what if we did Christmas day just me, you and Mabel? In bed in our PJ's? I'll cook us Christmas dinner. Then Boxing day we do a buffet for both families?" she sits up to look at him "So, a lazy Christmas day? In bed?"

"Yeah...PJ's, snuggles in bed and a Harry Taylor roast. What more could a girl ask for?!" he winks waiting for her answer. "I love it!" his face lights up "Really?!" he questions her. "Yeah, Christmas day in bed with my hunky boyfriend, but I have one alteration....no pajamas!" He raises a brow to her, "Noted!" he jokes. "Instead Christmas jumpers!!!" this wasn't the answer he was expecting.

She giggles "Your face! But I want matching Christmas pajamas!" He chuckles "OK, but no photos my brothers will rip into me!" she sighs "Oh! Come on, one photo? Just to make me happy?" she pouts. "Fine, if it makes you happy." she claps getting her own way, "I think you owe it to Mabel after today!"

He chuckles "She looked cute!" "She did! Oh are you working Saturday?" she asks. "I don't think so?" he questions. "Every Christmas we do a friends Christmas party, kinda like a blow out before the family stuff. Nikki has planned it for Friday night and she has found somewhere that is having a 90's to 2020's night"

"Sounds good, who's going?" he asks. "Remy, Alec, Nikki, Stu, Alene, Daniel and now us!" she smiles. "I'm guessing we get completely smashed then?" she laughs.

Friday evening.

They arrive at the club Nikki found, Laila and Harry are the last to arrive.

Laila notices Stu and Nikki at the bar, she sneaks up behind her Stu spy's her, but Laila puts her index finger to her lips signalling him not to say anything. As she reaches Nikki, she wraps her arms around waist, making Nikki whip round with a face like thunder until she realises it was her friend "Laila, I was just about to...whatever. Glad you guys are here." she shouts over the music.

"Sorry, Mabel's walker got back late. Where are the others?" Laila calls back, Nikki points over to a table where the rest of the group are sat. Harry leans in, "Shall we get a drink first?" Laila nods "What you guys having?" Stu asks. "I know Laila's drink, Harry what ya having?" Nikki asks.

After they make their way over to the others "Hey!!" Laila call out as she takes a seat next to Alec, who hugs her and Harry. They are sat for a few minutes when Kelly Rowland - Commander begins to play Nikki jumps up, grabbing Laila's hand dragging her to the dance floor.

Nikki starts to sing along.

"From here on out

I'll be your commander (I'll be your commander)

No fear no doubt

I'll provide the answer

Right now I command you to dance"

She points to Laila, who starts to sing along with her. The pair are dancing on the edge of the dance floor in view of the table, laughing, their bodies swaying to the music the pair attract a couple of strangers, who slowly move closer to them waiting to make their move to become their unwanted dance partners.

Completely oblivious to the unwanted strangers, the song switches to Rihanna - Only Girl they continue to dance. Suddenly both girls feel someone behind them as they turn they saw Stu and Harry, Laila looks up at him confused "I thought you don't dance?" she laughs. He wraps his hands round her, swaying her as he leans in, "I don't, but those blokes behind me were inches away from trying to dance with you two."

She looks behind him "Oh, you didn't want me dancing with a stranger?" she laughs, he shook his head and they continued dancing away.

The next song was Magic - Rude as it starts up Laila starts singing it to Harry when she gets to the chorus he joins in.....

"Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?

Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know

You say I'll never get your blessing till the day I die

'Tough luck, my friend, but the answer is no!'

Why you gotta be so Rude?

Don't you know I'm human too?

Why you gotta be so Rude?

I'm gonna marry her anyway

Marry that girl, marry her anyway

Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say

Marry that girl, and we'll be a family

Why you gotta be so Rude?"

Both grinning and smiling, he cups her face pulling her in for a kiss.

A little later back at the table "Laila, Boxing day....is it OK to bring Melissa?" Alene asks, Laila looks over to Rem. "Is Rem OK with that?" she looks to Alene who nods "If it's OK with Rem it's OK with me." when she looks up Rem mouths "Thank you." to her.

Daniel comes over from the bar with a tray of drinks "Sex on the beach anyone?" he passes them around the group. "Damn Daniel at least buy a girl a drink first!" Alene teases him "Sorry Len, but you aren't my type!" he winks at her, the group laugh.

A little later Perfect Gentleman - Wyclef Jean starts playing a tipsy Harry pulls Laila away from the bar and onto the dance floor. He spins her before pulling her close to him swaying them together. "Hey, you are a liar!! You can dance!" Laila giggles as she wraps her arms around his neck.

"My moo....ves only get bet...ter after I've add....a few." his words are slurred, his hips move with hers. He spins her round again, her body collides with his "I think you need to get drunk at every party or night out if it improves your dance moves!" he smirks before claiming her lips. As they sway with their lips locked, Laila can feel him begin to stiffen against her hips "Hmmm....someone seems to be enjoy themselves a little to much!" She winks.

He looks round checking no one is near, his lips brush against her ear "Can we head home? I got some other kinda moves I want to show you!" she giggles and bites her lip, "Let's go!" they say their goodbyes and head for the tube.

10 Minutes later.

Their underground train arrives empty, he sits and pulls her onto his lap. He captures her lips, the kiss becomes heated, Harry pulls off his coat and places it on her lap. His hand creeps under his coat snaking into her jeans "Bear, not here!" she whispers, he smirks against her lips continuing his trail. He lets out a soft growl. He reaches her hidden jewel, her head rolls back as his lip pepper down her neck.

She bites back a moan as he works between her slick slits.

Through the speaker they hear the next station is their stop, they both groan with disappointment. "Come on, we can continue this at home!" she gets up as the train pulls into their station.

2 Weeks later.

It's the day before Christmas Eve, Laila has just finished her last day until the new year, she wanders into the kitchen, "Oh, Harry! You're home early!" she was sure he mentioned he was training Stu tonight.

He's leaning against the kitchen counter with a whiskey in his hand, he looks over to her "I canceled Stu's PT session....Laila, there's something I need to tell you..."

He looks as if what he's about to tell her is tearing him up inside, her minds goes into overdrive....Was history repeating itself?

"Bear?" she looks at him concerned, he takes a deep breath "When I came back today to take Mabel for a walk at lunch....I bumped into Nessa." she laughs, "What is she annoyed we didn't get her to take Mabel out today?" he silently chuckles, but it quickly fades. "She was walking another client's dog, she asked if she could join Mabel as I was taking her over to the fields. We were just sat on a bench talking...she asked me about work and us. Then this afternoon she turned up at my work for a PT session, I didn't even know she booked. I was giving her a tour of the gym and she tried to kiss me..."

Laila's cheeks burn, but soon drain cold "What?!" was all she could conjure up from her lips. "Laila, I promise you as soon as she leaned in I stepped back. I was just as confused as you are, I asked her to leave after that." she can see he's just as shocked as she is "Laila? Please say something!" he softly pleads with her.

She sighs, making her way over to him cupping his face "Looks like we need to find a new dog walker." she laughs, he rolls his eyes at her. "Hey, It's not the first and probably won't be the last time a client tries to make a move on you....I remember a client making some more steamier moves on you about 7 months ago," she grins at him. He laughs, "Those were wanted moves!" he reminds her. "More than wanted...just look at what happened that night...but I'm glad you told me about Nessa." she pushes up on her tiptoes to kiss his nose.

"I've never given another woman a tour of the changing rooms since." he laughs before continuing "That is how and why we work because we are honest with one another!" he kisses her nose. "OK, can I be really honest..Bear?" he nods, "You stink!! Did you not shower before coming home?" Laila baits him. "Oh, I do? Do I?" he raises a brow to her.

With that he throws her over his shoulder "Harry?! Put me down!" she screams between her laughter. "Sorry, my love that's a no!"  his hand strikes her arse cheek as he begins to climb the stairs with her over his shoulder. "Harry!!"

Later.

Cuddled up on the sofa watching a film "Bear?" he hums in response. "Can I be the one to sack Nessa?" she giggle, he starts searching her hair, "Harry, what are you doing?" she asks. "Looking for your devil horns," he chuckles, "But if it makes you happy...Yes, you can sack her.... to be fair, it means I don't have to deal with her," he starts to stroke her hair back down "Now how to do it? Mwahahaha!!" she fakes an evil laugh, "You really are the devil!" he smiles at her "Oh, you've seen nothing yet, Bear!" she winks.

@aussieez​ @secretaryunpaid​ @lem-20​ @irisofpurple​ @khoicesbyk​ @txemrn​ @wombatsxkookaburras​ @beautifuluknownvoid​

He pulls her onto his lap, so she's straddling him, he cups her face "Why don't you show me?" his lips crash to hers.

Chapter 4

[addictofsupernatural]

OHSHC Rewrite: Episode 2

The Job of a High School Host!

Host Club x reader

Summary: Y/n learns the duties of a host.

Word Count: 4.9k

Episode Masterlist

You've been a host for almost two weeks now. It's been interesting, to say the least. Tamaki and the twins have been trying to get you into a dress since you put on the school uniform, but you cleaned the male uniform and refused all their demands.

Maria got letters from your friends back in y/c, to which she wanted to surprise you by putting them in your bag. You didn't notice them at school, and you didn't notice them when they were sticking out during homeroom.

But Hikaru and Kaoru did. Once the class was over, the three envelopes fell out of your backpack, though you kept walking. They looked at each other and nodded. Hikaru them and went on and they both went on with their day.

After doing your homework you rushed into the club room, only to see very real tropical decorations everywhere. The hosts had luau outfits on as well. "Welcome."

"This is different." You stated as you stepped in, looking around.

"Of course!" Tamaki posed as he talked. "It might be early fall but here at the Host Club we'd like our guests to feel as if they're in a tropical paradise. And plus, our heating system is... perfect!"

You gave him a slight look at his bragging, to which Kyoya smiled a bit. "Do you have a problem with the way we run our club y/n? Remember, you still owe us 8 million yen."

You set your bag down on your spot. "Charming." You said sarcastically, passing by him and giving him a sly smile. "I feel very free to speak my mind, really. So was this tropical island thing your idea?"

"All ideas dealing with the host club events come directly from the king. Although I will admit to casually slipping a Bali pamphlet onto his desk." He kept his smile as he continued writing in his book.

"Of course. Well someone should tell the king that he's really clever." You patted his arm before going and sitting down with your clients. "Good afternoon ladies—"

The twins each blew a whistle and marched over to you. "Hold it right there!" They said in unison. "Who's Julian?!"

You turned over to them, a bit surprised at the mentioning of that name. "What do you mean?"

"Three envelopes fell out of your bag, and one was from a boy named Julian." Kaoru said.

They then got very close to you, asking, "So who's Julian?!"

"An old friend." You shrugged, putting out your hand for the letters. They gave them back to you, but also gained the attention of Tamaki.

"How good of a friend is he?" He zoomed right behind your couch.

You didn't know why Tamaki was so territorial of his friends, but you knew there must be a reason. That didn't mean you couldn't still have fun with him. You fake sighed lovingly. "He's the best."

"Is he... handsome?"

"He has an adorable face. I love it so much!"

"You love it?" You gave you his puppy dog eyes.

"Yup."

"Do you have... feelings... for him?"

"Oh, I'm only totally in love with him."

"WHA~T?!" He then wrapped you in a hug. "But you're my little girl~"

You sighed again. "Yeah. It's too bad you're more his type."

"Huh?"

He blankly stared at you, and you bursted into a fit of giggles. "He's gay, so calm down."

"Oh." He then stood up and cleared his throat. "Well then, that's one less man to worry about. You don't know how many evil boys there are in the world, so you have to be careful."

"Yeah, I should also be careful of weird people who call themselves 'daddy'." An arrow struck through Tamaki as you walked over to the twins. "Thanks for holding onto these for me." Your smile made them blush. "And thank you for not opening them, since you guys are pretty nosey."

"We don't know what you're talking about." They both said as they shrugged.

"But y/n," Kaoru started saying.

"Why don't you open them for us?" Hikaru finished.

You scoffed. "Please guys, I'm working." You then turned to your clients as they sighed, smiling. "I'm sorry girls. What did you want to talk about?"

"Well, we were wondering if you were going to dress up in something tropical."

"Do you all want me to?" You asked, unsure if you wanted to go through with that.

"Yes!" They said happily.

Tamaki then appeared with a smile. "I already made you an outfit y/n. And look, we're a pair! Isn't it cute?"

You frowned. "You know I don't really like skirts."

He then showed you his big watery eyes. "But Kyoya gave you a dress and you accepted it no problem."

"He was doing it to be nice. You're doing this because you want to see me in a dress. That's weird."

He looked like he was going to burst from anger. He then pushed the outfit into your hands. "Just go change!"

You then changed into the shoulderless top with the long skirt, which also accompanied a lot of jewelry. You then went out and tried to discreetly go back to your clients. "Oh my goodness y/n, you're so cute!" One exclaimed.

"Y/N~" Tamaki jumped over to you and crushed you into a hug. "Everybody, look!"

"Let's not please." You whispered. Your face went red as you frustratedly looked to the ground.

"Wow." The twins said, grabbing your arms.

"Who knew y/n," Kaoru said.

"Could be such a girl." Hikaru finished.

"Looks cute." They said, giving you a thumbs up.

"Please stop drawing in more attention." You said quietly.

"Takashi~ look!" Honey dragged you over to them. "Doesn't she look adorable?"

"Yeah."

Tamaki and the twins had evil stars in their eyes as they inched closer to you. You didn't notice the blush on Mori's face when you went to go hide behind him. The three then shouted, "Give her to us!"

Mori shook his head and took your shoulders, guiding you to your couch.

"Thank you senpai." You said quietly. You then put your hands over your face. You peaked at your smiling clients. "Okay, I did this for you guys."

"How do you feel in cosplay?"

"Exhausted!" You put your hands to your side quickly only to begin shaking your arms, hearing the jewelry jingle as you moved. They began to giggle at your innocent and child-like movements. "Jeez, what's with this?"

"Y/n, you forgot your crown!" Tamaki stuck it out towards you as an offering.

You took a deep breath and drank some tea, not looking at him. "If it's worth more than me I'm not wearing it."

He gave you an angrily confused look. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm not putting something ridiculous and way too expensive on my head. I don't even feel comfortable in this. It feels like I'm lowering the value of it by just wearing it." Your tone was a sarcastic one, which caused smiles from around your area. Though it was a joke, you were only half-kidding.

"Excuse me." A girl came up to you and said. "I believe we're supposed to be switching hosts now."

"Oh, you must be my next appointment." You grinned, waving to her childishly even though she was right in front of you. "It's nice to meet you."

She then grabbed your chin and brought your face closer to hers. "I've just decided. You're going to be my new favorite host." This seemed to effect Tamaki.

Once the club finished everything, you walked over to go change until Kyoya stopped you. "Your words with Tamaki seemed to amuse some of the guests, and many of those guests have requested you."

"Cool. I guess my clownery is likable." You chuckled and nodded.

Clownery. What an odd made up word. He thought about what his clients told them about you. You spoke with slang, though it almost as if you didn't realize it. They said that they found it adorable. Your speech being adorable. It was an interesting thought, in its own way.

Once you put back on your uniform, Kyoya instructed you to make Tamaki some instant ramen. You did so and finished cleaning. Once you finished that you sat down and noticed that Tamaki was irritated.

"C'mon boss, quit eating that commoner's ramen and help plan the party." Kaoru said.

"What's up with him?" You asked.

"He's just upset with Lady Kanako choosing you." Kyoya said as he typed away on his laptop. "She's had the illness for a while now though, so I don't know why he's too surprised."

"What disease?"

"The host hopping disease." The twins said.

You giggled, grinning. "So he's jealous that I stole her from him."

"Shut up! I couldn't care less!" Tamaki yelled. "That's it, my patience has run out. It's time you started dressing like a girl!"

"That's really what's bothering you?"

"I just don't get it. How can you be so popular with the ladies when you yourself are a lady?!" He then went into his private chest, digging though it. "Now you listen to daddy. DADDY WANTS YOU TO GO BACK TO THE WAY YOU WERE AND KEEP WEARING SKIRTS!!"

He brought out a huge framed photo of you in a high and tight half pony tail, which contrasted your usually messy pony tail. You were wearing a cropped long sleeved dark gray shirt, with a black skirt and dark panty hose under.

"DON'T GO BLOWING UP MY PHOTOS WITHOUT ASKING ME FIRST!!"

He hung it up on the wall and began crying. Everybody crowded around it.

"The more I look at this photo the more amazed I am." Kaoru said. "How did you go from that to wearing suits?"

Everyone turned to look at you. "I used to have a neighbor who owned a Burlesque lounge. Sometimes she needed someone to cover a waitress shift, and I would do it. This was the most covered up she would allow me to be though."

"I see." Kyoya said. "Those places are known for having women reveal a large amount of skin."

"I wore that stuff cause I had to. I feel more comfortable not showing my legs. I don't care if I dress like a dude sometimes."

"A GIRL SHOULD NEVER ADDRESS HERSELF AS A DUDE!!" Tamaki yelled. "MAMA~!! Y/n's using those dirty boy words again."

"I hate to break up this interesting conversation, but do you have any formal dancing experience?" Hikaru asked.

You turned and smiled nervously. "No, but I don't have to go to parties and stuff, right?"

Tamaki's eyes began to shine. "I absolutely forbid that. You must go to every event hosted by the host club if you want to pay back your debt! If you fail to do so, you'll be demoted back to errand boy" He then got a lot happier. "And that also means you have to wear a dress at the party!"

"No it's cool, I have a formal guy outfit." They all stared at you. "What? I got it when I had to go to a wedding."

"Why won't you wear something like thi~s?" Tamaki said with tears in his eyes.

"Cause it was for a job."

"This is a job!"

"No, this is indentured servitude. There's a difference. Slight, but it's there." You then briefly thought. "Oh, I guess that also means I have to learn the man's part since I'm a host."

Kanako was instructing you what to do, and you were getting the hang of it quickly. "You're quite a fast learner miss y/n."

"And you're quite an exceptional teacher Miss Kanako." Your gaze went to Tamaki, who looked sad. He wanted to teach you, but was too tall to be in the girl role. He glanced over to you, and you smiled and waved. He hesitantly gave you a small smile and waved back. Because of this you weren't paying attention tripped up the both of you. "I'm so sorry Lady Kanako!"

She pulled you closer. "That's quite alright."

"You're very forward." You smiled down at her before rolling to the side and pulling the both of you up. "C'mon, let's get you some tea."

You brought her tea as she happily held onto the cup. "You have a new order for tea sets I see. The handy work looks like it's Genorie."

"You have a keen eye mademoiselle." Kyoya said as he passed by.

"Such a pretty color." She gazed into the tea cup with a smile. "How lovely."

"Woah, you seem to know a lot about tea sets, huh?" You asked. This, unbeknownst to you, gained Tamaki's attention.

"What? Of course not!" She said shakily, blushing. "What ever would give you that idea?!"

Just then someone walked in with a box in hand. "You ordered a new tea set?" He asked Kyoya as he walked over to him.

"Yes we did. Y/n, come over and grab these." Kyoya said.

You nodded and smiled at him as he gave you the box. You opened the lid and looked at the set. "Wow, these are really nice. Are you an expert on things like this?"

Kanako began laughing. "Oh y/n, you're so out of the loop. It can be pardoned though." She turned back with a teasing smile. "After all, he doesn't look like an heir to a first class industry empire."

His facial expression changed as he looked at her. You noticed but decided not to say anything.

"The Susushima family has dealt mainly with table wear." Kyoya explained. "They are, in fact, a first class company."

"I think that's so awesome! You seem to have a lot of passion into what you're going to be doing, which is very admirable." You told him with a small smile.

He turned to you and bashfully smiled. "You think so? I'm honored. Well, see you all next time."

After he left and you walked back to Kanako with the box still in hand. "He's pretty handsome, don't you think?" You asked in your native language.

"Um, pardon?"

"Oh, sorry." You cleared your throat. "I'm asking if you think he's attractive."

She blushed profusely and nervously sipped on her tea. "I don't know! I suppose!"

"I get the feeling you two know each other."

She spat out her tea and began to panic again. "What would ever give you that silly conclusion? I have no idea what you're talking about! Anyways, take care!" She quickly left.

You stood up right before Honey jumped onto your back, almost knocking the box out of your hands. "Y/n-chan~! Guess what? They do know each other! Suzushima-chan is Kasuga-chan's fiance."

"Woah, really?"

"Kyoya," Tamaki said. "What do you know about this?"

He looked in his book. "They were childhood friends. Their parents set up an arranged marriage between them. I didn't find this information of any importance so I disregarded it."

"And what do you know of Suzushima?"

"Toro Suzushima. Outstanding grades, bare social status. Ordinary looking. He's reliable, in case of persuasion to place blame."

"He doesn't have much presence and is faint hearted." The twins said.

"In order words, he's boring." Kyoya closed his book.

"Wow," You said. "Who knew you guys were so cold to other men."

"We don't have any use of him so there's no reason to be nicer in describing him." Kyoya explained.

"Interesting philosophy." You said teasingly. "I can feel the kindness radiating off of you."

"Suzushima is a good boy." Honey said, on top of Mori. "Right?"

"Yeah." Mori replied.

"Alright men! It's time for a plan!" Tamaki announced. "It's our job at the Ouran Host Club to make every woman happy!"

When Tamaki finished explaining his plan, everybody packed up and left, leaving only Kyoya and you. He had just finished on his laptop and was packing up his things. You walked behind him. "Senpai, is it okay if I ask you a question?"

"Is it about what I said earlier?" He didn't turn around.

"Kind of. I mean, if we're talking about the same thing." You kept your voice steady and light.

"Was it what I said about not needing Suzushima?"

"Woah, no. Not at all. I was thinking about how you did a background check on him."

He paused briefly. "I see. What of it?"

Your voice unintentionally shrank. "Did you do one on me?"

"Yes. A few days ago, in fact. You fail to mention your brother when people ask about your history." His voice was so calm and normal. It made you feel very exposed.

"Everything I've said isn't a lie." You managed to say firmly.

"I know that as well. I understand your situation and I respect your reasonings for not talking about him. You've been through quite a lot, and you have a right to privacy."

"Please answer this next question honestly." His silence meant that he was still listening. "Do you think of me any lower or less, I don't know, appealing, now that you know everything about me?" You then nervously chuckled. "Unless it was already that low to begin with."

"I assure you that my views of you are of a hard working person who seems to make many people happy. Not wanting people to know certain things about you and having certain insecurities do not waver what I 'think' of you."

You let out a breath and grinned, hugging him from the back. He widened his eyes, but didn't tense nor pull away.

"Thank you Kyoya senpai. This really means a lot." You then let go of him. "Okay, I need to walk home before it gets dark. See you tomorrow." You then quickly went to the door. "Sorry if that hug was weird for you!" You called out as you left.

His opinions mattered to you. It was an interesting thought, in its own way.

As you were getting ready for the party, Maria came into your room. "Can't you be at least a bit girly?"

"Funny, that's really funny Maria." You turned to face her and sat down. "You're quite the tomboy yourself sometimes."

"I'm serious y/n/n. You should try a little makeup. You'll look nice for all your friends. One of them is bound to fall for you." She said in an offering tone.

You chuckled and shook your head. "They're all just friends. And I shouldn't have to try to impress anybody."

She sighed, going over to your nightstand and opening a drawer. She took out a black box and opened it, revealing the earrings you got back after your father was imprisoned. "At least wear one of your mom's earrings. They all look cute on you."

You looked in the box. She loved to collect them. "I don't know, maybe."

She grabbed your cheeks and smushed them. "Think about it." You grabbed her cheeks and did the same. "I also have something to tell you."

"Good or bad?"

She hesitated before quickly saying, "My sisters are coming for a few days to visit." And then sped walked out of the room.

"What?!" You followed her. "Please tell me Linda's son won't be coming too." She gave you a look, and that was all you needed to know. "Oh my gosh, I'm going to my club. That's gonna be my safe space for now."

"At least you have a safe space. I'll have to deal with Linda 24/7."

You then went back into your room and hesitantly grabbed a pair of earrings, putting them in your pants pocket. "I gotta go. I should start walking now."

She stopped you. "Take off the blazer at least." You took off the blazer with a pout. She then pulled off your messy ponytail. "Do something better with your hair too." You tied up two messy double buns. "There. You look adorable. Go."

You got there and joined all except Tamaki at the second floor in the auditorium. "Welcome, my little lambs," Tamaki said from the third floor. "To a magical night of your lives!"

Kyoya then spoke up. "As always ladies we are here for your enjoyment. Dance to your heart's content. The best dancer will be decided among us hosts and will be crowned queen. As a reward the queen will receive a passionate kiss on the cheek from our king, Tamaki Suoh. Good luck to all you."

They all began cheering, and you snickered over the stupidity of the 'prize'. The twins came over to you and began playing with your buns.

"These are cute." Hikaru said.

"You have a raggedy yet carefree look. The hairstyle compliments you." Kaoru told you. "Hey, have you ever been to a party before?"

"Not formal parties. Only block parties on my street."

"Well, since you're here y/n, you might as well enjoy yourself." Kyoya said. "We have quite the spread of desserts."

You then innocently asked, "Like squishy ice cream?"

"SQUI—"

"—SHY—"

"—ICE CREAM?!"

Tamaki flipped down to your floor and pointed to Kyoya, who was already dialing a number on his phone. "Kyoya! Order some squishy ice cream right away!"

"Two orders of mochi please." He said to his phone. The twins smothered you in a hug as your face burned from embarrassment. You felt like such an idiot foreigner right now.

In the meantime you danced with some girls, being flamboyant and silly when dancing with them. There was one girl who tripped over your shoes and almost fell until you caught her. She wouldn't stop laughing loudly, and it caused you to laugh as well. Others wanted to talk, so you danced regularly with them.

As you took a break from dancing with some girls Kanako approached you. "There you are y/n, I've been looking everywhere for you. May I have this next dance?"

"It would be my pleasure Lady Kanako." You began to dance with her. "You're so formal. It's really fascinating to me."

"Your expressions and slang are fascinating to me as well." She said.

"Kasuga-chan's here!" Honey announced.

"Honey, Mori," Tamaki said. "Commence with the operation."

Both nodded before swiftly grabbing you away and dashing to an empty room with the twins and Kyoya. "Did you guys really have to be so forceful?"

"Nevermind that, go and change." Hikaru shoved a bag into your hands and pushed you into the changing room.

"Remember y/n, we only have 37 minutes before the climax of the night," Kyoya said. "And a little accident might make the evening more interesting."

You saw a tube of concealer on the small table when you went in. You knew Kyoya left it for you, and it made you smile. You quickly changed into the dark purple dress and put concealer on the scars of your legs. You then remembered the earrings in your pocket and put them on. They were rose gold hoops with what looked like flower petals on them.

You then went outside, where the twins quickly put on your makeup. Kaoru then gently touched one of your earrings. "We didn't put these in the bag. Are these yours?"

"Yeah." You quietly said.

"They compliment the dress. It was good that you brought them." You smiled at him, causing him to blush and look away.

"Y'know," Hikaru said as they finished up. "I know the boss wants to stick to the strategy, but this is..."

"What are you all doing standing around here?" Tamaki asked as he came in. "The guests are wai—"

You stood up and faced him. You then began walking as the boys stared at you. "You look cute!" Honey stated.

Everyone blushed but Honey and Kyoya, who were both smiling. "My face feels heavy." You pouted as you kept walking.

"Hurry up!" The twins called out as you kept walking.

"Yeah, I got it." You muttered. As you left, the twins and Tamaki began to fawn over you.

You walked into the room they told you to. Suzushima turned around with a surprised look. You timidly smiled as you walked over to him. "You're not at all what I pictured from the letter you wrote me."

You kept your smile on. "Really?" He nodded. "Can I actually see the letter please?" He then gave it to you, and you read over it:

I'm in love love with you! From the first day I laid eyes on you I've been head over heals in love! Tee hee! All these feelings I have are harpooned to my heart as they keep whipping around my mind like the restless waves! When the special day comes, I want to randezvou with you on Noah's arc! I do I do!

You wondered who the hell would write such a stupid letter. It was actually a collaborative write with Kyoya and the twins. "Excuse me," Suzushima interrupted your thoughts. "Have we met before?"

"No! It's um, the first time we've ever talked!"

"I'm flattered by your letter, but I'm afraid I can't return your feelings." He said. "My heart has been taken by somebody else."

"My apologies! I didn't realize you had a girlfriend."

"No, she's not my girlfriend. I don't even think she's even interested anymore." He looked very sad.

"Well I don't know about that. Your calming presence is a joy to be around, and I'm sure she'd agree." You offered.

He sighed. "Thank you, but honestly, I'm sure she'd be better off with someone more self confident. That's why I'm leaving next month to study abroad. Hopefully become a better man for her. Maybe it's selfish, but I hope she'll wait for me."

"I won't lie to you, it's a little selfish." An arrow went through him. You squished your index finger and thumb. "Just a little. But Toro, if she really is the love of your life then I'm sure she'll still love you just as much as she probably already does."

He was about to say something as he reached out for you, but you heard the door open. You didn't turn so she wouldn't see your face. "Oh, I'm sorry to intrude." You could tell she was crying. "I'll just leave you two be."

You heard her heels and knew she was running away, and he ran after her. "Kanako, wait!"

You then walked next to Tamaki. "We didn't make things worse, did we?"

"He did run after her. He needs to learn how to be more sure of himself."

You were both walking back when you tripped again over your heels. Tamaki interlocked your arms together. You looked up at him. "You really need to learn how to walk in heels. They look so lovely on you, and it'd be a shame if you tripped and hurt yourself."

You smiled and nodded, leaning on his shoulder. You then tripped again, only for him to hold onto you and prevent you from falling. You giggled, followed shortly by Tamaki chuckling with you.

You both went over to the balcony. The lights hit, and you saw Kanako and Toro. "Let us join together and announce that this couple has been chosen for the final waltz of the night." Tamaki announced.

He said something to her, squeezing his eyes shut and asking her for a dance. You snickered. "Why are you laughing?" Kaoru asked.

"I know he's trying his best, but he looks kinda goofy right now." All the hosts looked from you to them and smiled. "They're awesome together though."

"May this awkward couple be forever blessed!" Tamaki exclaimed.

Kyoya then stepped forward. "And now for the grand prize, a kiss from our royalty."

"Y/n with step in for Tamaki." Kaoru said with a banana peel in his hand.

"And the kiss with be for Toro Suzushima." Hikaru added with another banana peel in his hand.

Tamaki was shocked, and you turned to Kyoya. "I'm not gonna—"

"It'll lower your debt by a third."

"I mean it is just a peck." You smiled and headed down.

"Wha..." Tamaki said.

"Also," You said as you began walking down the stairs. "You guys need to work on your love letter skills, because that was embarring for me to read."

As you went down Suzushima saw you and gave you a surprised expression. "You..."

"Y/n," Kanako said. "Were you the girl with Toro?"

"Hi guys. We just needed to give you two a gentle nudge. I promise I'm not in love with Toro. And I'm really sorry and embarrassed they gave you that stupid letter. I didn't write any of that." You smiled at them.

He nodded. "Thank you."

You then looked at Kanako. "May I?"

"Sure. It'll mark the beginning of our relationship."

Up from the balcony, Tamaki was reaching out for you weakly. "I wonder if this is y/n-chan's first kiss?" Honey thought out loud.

This made Tamaki snap, and he began running to you. "Wait y/n~!"

He slipped on the twins' banana peels and accidentally pushed you, causing you to kiss Toro on the lips instead. Kyoya did say that a little accident would make the night a little more interesting.

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Author's Note: Comment if you liked it (please) or if you want to be tagged 😁

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Tag List:

@krustykrabbspizza @animefan7420 @strangerthingsholland @the-dead-fucking-sea

[cartermarcian]

4Kids Korner - Season 2 - Episode 3

I'm a bit late this week because I got caught up with work and school-related dread, but now I'm back to bring you more 4Kids products! This week we have an epic trifepic: Winx Club Magazine Issue one - the castle, Kirby Right Back at Ya - Ice Kirby (DVDouble-Shot) and Kirby Right Back at Ya - Kirby Comes to Cappy Town!

Let's start by getting the smallest one out of the way. Here's Kirby Right Back at Ya - Ice Kirby (2005)

There's something I oddly like about DVDouble-Shot. Starting In 2005, the DVDouble-Shot line was introduced featuring two-Episode DVDs of 4Kids most profitable shows as a way of promoting 4Kids TV. As for the consumer, the main selling point is that you could buy them for a low price, collect and possibly trade them with your friends, kind of like Pokémon cards. I like the idea of one kid saying to the other on the playground, "hey, wanna trade your Ninja Turtles for my YuGiOh?" How successful they were, I have no idea, but they're fun and easy to review on this show. Given their small portion size, practically every DVDouble-Shot is the same. This one had the episodes "The Chill Factor" and "DeDeDe's Snow Job," in accordance with the ice theme of the disc. It also features assorted promos for then-current and upcoming 4Kids shows identical to those seen in the 4Kids TV September demo disc (which I will hopefully review some time in the future.) Before we move on, though there's one little thing I want to point out about the box art. You can't see it in the photos I've provided, but the ice monster on the cover is far more pixelated than Kirby, if you look closely at it, so it appears to me that they lifted it right out of the episode and placed it on the cover. I guess that's just what happens when no official art of a character exists for your graphic designers to use...

Now that we have that one out of the way, let's talk about the stars of today's episode, which actually turned out to have much more historical value than most of the other stuff in my collection. So say hello to the Winx Club Magazine Premiere Issue, The Castle (2005)

This is a very special addition to my collection not only because it's part of what I consider to be 4Kids' absolute peak year, but since the book was presumably printed in January of 2005, it means this was one of the first pieces of of merchandise to feature the now-famous 4Kids TV logo. Heck it might have even been printed before then. As for the book itself, it's quite cute as it features everything an 8-11 year old girl wanting to be a hip and trendy 2000s teenager could want, and contains surprisingly few ads for Winx Club merch. And even more adorable, is the publisher's attempts to fit that description using words like "slammin'" in sentences. I call it a magazine, but it's really more dedicated to the comic included, "The Castle," which I would have read, but I needed to get some sleep the day I read it, so I skimmed the book's numerous activities, instead. But for those still interested, the comic is a retelling of Bloom's enrollment in Alfea, with original art that's pretty accurate to the actual show. But the book's real allure is the activities. Like the free trading card you'll see in the photo above. It even comes with a full-page description of what a trading card game is, making reference to YuGiOh in the process, which I thought was funny since 4Kids owned that, and also because it heavily implies that only boys play YuGiOh when the show itself has many female duelists. After that, you have a faux interview with Bloom taken from the perspective of a fellow Alfea Student. What I remember most clearly about that, is that Bloom says she listens to top 40's, which made me think "man, she's got some trash music taste," even though I, myself have said on multiple occasions off of tumblr that I listen to basically everything. Also included on the magazine are a paper fortune-telling toy, a best friend diary which includes a "secret crush" slot to fill in, a page for writing down predictions about the reader's future, and even a personality test which assigns your traits to a type of flower, as suggested by Flora on the page. The funny thing about this is that one question asks for the reader's favorite kind of movie, and one of the options is "anime everything," which I thought was funny since anime was just starting to get big at that time in America, and the online anime community was just starting to grow. Finally, on the last page, probably the most creative of all, is a step-by-step slumber party plan by Musa, which details inviting everyone over, having them show up dressed as their favorite popstar (like Brittany Spears, for example) and bring their favorite CD from said popstar, then taking turns playing them and talking about them. It sounds quite fun, and it made me smile imagining all the little kids who tried this. That's exactly what I think is awesome about children's entertainment: it makes them happy and builds their imagination. So that's the Winx Club Magazine, a really good buy, but I must admit they used the same art of the girls more than once on a few occasions, and also wrote in a plot hole in the interview with Bloom, where she says she discovered her powers as a child, but in the show she unlocks them at her current age when saving Stella from the first monsters of the series. So it may have a couple flukes, but still quite enjoyable.

And last, but never least, it's time for Kirby Right Back at Ya: Kirby Comes to Dream Land (2002)

This one is also historically significant for two reasons. One is that it was the very first release of one of the more famous non-Pokémon/YuGiOh shows 4Kids had to offer, but it also played a part in promoting the very launch of the Fox Box, as you'll see on the box art. This disc may only have the first three episodes of the show, but it super makes up for it with a plethora of special features, more than any of the DVDs I currently own, and that they strangely enough don't tell you about on the box. And speaking of the box, though you might not see it, the episode descriptions on the back are written entirely in comic sans. Yeah, it's clear to see 4Kids wasn't quite as sharp as they would be in the next few years... and the DVD menus are also written entirely in this font. But that doesn't take away from the outstanding value. much like the Fright to the Finish DVD, this one's special features are split between two menus. For this one, there's "More Kirby" and "Added Attractions," which is the far superior one, but more on that in a minute. The More Kirby menu features a character gallary telling you about the main cast, set to music from the show. Then there's "Kirbyoke," which is there to teach the kids the words to the theme song. And finally, we have a preview for the next DVD in the series, which at that point hadn't a proper name, so Mike Pollock's voice just refers to it as "Kirby Right Back at Ya Volume 2." Then, in the "Added Attractions" menu, we have a promo for Cubix - Robots for Everyone's first DVD release, a short promo for the newly-launched FoxBox.TV website, and the star of this review by far, "What's Inside The Fox Box?!" This incredible 14 minute long promo (which you can find on Youtube, by the way,) previews every single show in the Fox Box's initial lineup as a way of hyping up the network for it's September 2002 launch. Well, kind of... You see, 4Kids made multi-minute promos for their own productions, complete with plot synopses by Mike Pollock and others and theme songs for the shows. Meanwhile, Stargate Infinity, a third-party show, only got a promo featuring still images of the main cast, a paper-thin explanation of the plot and no opening, all clocking in at under a minute. So, yeah, pretty lame move on 4Kids part, but at least we get to see HD footage of 4Kids lost Ultraman Tiga dub. Ultimately, it's a really fun promo from 4Kids' very beginnings as a dedicated children's entertainment company, even though it uses some uncut clips of guns in Fighting Foodons since the dub wasn't finished at that point. One last thing to point out: the promo for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (which hadn't even started production at the time,) features an unused theme song demo for the series which also made it's way onto the illusive Fox Box CD. So there you have it, one of the DVDs that started it all. Thanks for reading about it, as well as my other items this week. I will be back with more next week, so hang in there, and I'll see you all next time. Take care!

[odyssey-system]

Enchanted: Part of Your World #1

"Can you do me a favor, sweetheart?"

Fiona Seville was on the phone with her father Dave as she sat on the couch in her apartment. Her frizzy hair was a slight mess as she adjusted her legs. "Y-Yeah, of course, Dad."

She could hear him sigh on the other end of the phone, along with a cough. "I was supposed to go to a benefit masquerade ball tomorrow night. The one that I go to every year."

"Right! The one for state arts programs?"

"That's right. Well... I can't make it this year. I ended up with bronchitis and your brothers have to take care of me at home."

Fiona frowned. "I'm sorry, Dad..."

"It's alright. I was just wondering, since you were closer, could you make the donation in my place at the ball?"

She bit her lip. She was not typically a person to deal with large crowds, but for the only parent in her life, she'd take a leap of faith. "O-Okay but if I make the donation for you, can you transfer me replacement money after?"

"Of course, sweetheart. You have my word."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

After a few phone calls with her agent, Ethan Blake, Fiona was able to donate money, book a ride and acquire an outfit for the night. She'd spent the past few days looking around for pop culture tidbits she might have missed over the past week or so. She practiced talking to people in the mirror, and she arranged to get out an hour early from work that day.

So now, here she was, sitting in the front seat of a Dryve car in a stunning silver ballgown made by one of Ethan's friends, Addison Sinclair. The driver wasn't much for conversation, preferring to listen to the radio, but she didn't mind.

Eventually, the car pulled up to the designated drop-off point for the masquerade in front of the Sheridan Hotel in downtown Los Angeles, a line of paparazzi along the velvet roped red carpet. Fiona put on her mask and took a deep breath.

Showtime.

Fiona made her way out into the stream of flashing lights, walking toward the start of the red carpet. She only recognized one face in the line of paparazzi: Ana de Luca of Trend Magazine, one of her favorites. She put on her sweetest smile as she heard murmurs about how no one knew who she was, and she prepared for the barrage of questions with a nervous glimmer in her eyes.

Surprisingly, none of them approached her but she was asked to pose for pictures, to which she obliged.

What mattered more to her was getting inside after speaking to both of the hotel's front door bouncers and the bellhop, who helped her find the ballroom in which most of the event was held.

The ballroom was massive, much more extravagant and intimidating than Fiona could have ever imagined. It felt like she was walking around in a fish tank full of people.

It terrified her.

"This place is pretty cool, isn't it?" A young man in his early twenties asked her confidently. "Definitely better than my prom."

Fiona smiled, the conversation alleviating some of her nerves. "Yeah, it's beautiful in here."

"Is this your first time going to this?"

"Yeah."

The man gave an understanding smile. "Me too. I'm Chadley."

"I'm Fiona." She fixed her hair and her mask, shifting her remaining nerves into movement.

Chadley smiled. "Do you want to go get something to drink?"

Fiona nodded back at him. "I'd like that."

The two made their way over to a table with refreshments, Chadley immediately going over to the flutes of champagne. "Bubbly?"

"No thanks." She tried looking for other drinks but only ended up finding water on the table. She grabbed a glass and a reusable straw kit, following Chadley.

"How'd you get an invite to this party? Did you have to pass some initiation or something?"

Fiona laughed. "No. Why, did you?"

"Yeah, kind of! Mr. Groot said that I needed to start sharing my brain cells with my kind and jump into a canyon with no braces for my teeth." He said it with nonchalance, making Fiona recoil a little. His eyes widened. "No no, it's okay! My agent Ethan told me that it was his way of saying I needed to venture out of my comfort zone or something.

She sighed in relief. "This Groot guy might need to find a better way to come across with what he's saying correctly... But at least you have Ethan. He's my agent too."

"Oh sweet! He always has the best suits."

Fiona could think of a few other outstanding qualities about Ethan that would rank higher, but she did have to give Chadley that. "What do you do?"

"I'm a film actor. What about you?"

"Oh! Um..." Fiona's cheeks tinged pink slightly. "I'm a barista but I do have this character acting gig. I do birthday parties and stuff."

"That's cool! Do you like it?"

"Yeah! It's fun to make characters on your own that you can help people with, you know?"

"Hell yeah! So are you working during this party then?"

She shook her head. "No, my dad's a composer. He comes here every year, but he got sick and couldn't make it this time. He wanted me to make a donation this year for him, and I'd do anything for my dad."

"I get you. I'm gonna go talk to more people but-" He took a napkin and wrote down a set of digits. "Here's my cell phone number if you need something. I've gone to some stuff like this, I can help you."

Fiona smiled warmly. "You're so sweet, Chadley! I appreciate this, thank you."

"No worries, Fiona! Hope I see you around." He went off into another portion of the ballroom.

Afte watching him go and making sure he was alright, Fiona went to go sit next to the stage. It was sparsely used at the moment, a few musicians tuning and doing mic checks. She took a few minutes to browse her Pictagram feed idly, pausing on a post by the Wilshere siblings when she noticed something familiar about the backdrop.

"Excuse me." A tall male with shoulder-length hair and a beard said as he approached, gentle and calm with his security badge visible on his belt. "I need you to not block the stairs, ma'am."

Fiona blushed and glanced at the stairs. "Sorry, sir..."

"It's okay. Some of the acts are just ready to sound check."

"Right, of course." She followed him out of the way before spotting a pair of blondes approaching the stage: the Wilshere twins.

Fiona was in awe.

The male of the pair nodded to the security guard. "Thank you, Damien." He turned to Fiona. "Sorry for making you find a new wallflower spot. We just don't want anyone to get hurt, especially a charming young thing like you."

"Arthur! Don't tease the poor girl!" His sister strode over and gave a wide, warm smile. "Sorry about him." She took Fiona's hands. "You seem overwhelmed, love. Are you alright?"

Starstruck but true to Avery's observation, Fiona bit her lip. "I'm not used to navigating parties like this."

"I understand. These things can make a girl feel so small in a world so big, especially for your first time at one of these parties." She squeezes her hands. "There's a few different rooms next to the ballroom being rented out for the ball as well. Those might help you find a smaller group of people around here."

"Avery? Your turn for sound check," her brother called out.

The blonde sighed. "I have to go. But you've got this. I believe in you."

Fiona watched Avery go onto the stage, still anxious but more hopeful than before. She gave both her and Arthur a wave before walking around the ball a bit more.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

After half an hour of roaming all of the other rooms, Fiona found herself in one that resembled a casino. It was a bit smaller than the other rooms, which helped her anxiety, but it felt very much like a boys' club in there with the amount of older men. Several men stared at her as she walked in, appraising her like jewelry. Or worse. She did her best to not give them any ideas or pay them any mind.

Unsatisfied playing games with any of the older men, she made her way over to the bar that was for the most part unoccupied. She sat on the other end of the bar, ordering a coffee instead of alcohol because of her need to have a clear head to survive the night.

When her coffee arrived, the waitress also placed a notebook in front of her, a pen tied to the spiral. She opened it cautiously, seeing neat handwriting on the first page.

Are you alright?

Fiona looked up from her spot and noticed the only other patron at the bar: a younger male but still considerably older than her, nursing a glass of scotch in his hand. His eyes met hers, and he smiled genuinely back at her. She pointed to him and then down at the notebook. He nodded in response. She quickly wrote a response after grabbing a pen from her purse:

Yeah. My first time at one of these events. It's a little scary.

She slid the notebook over to him so the waitress didn't have to do it. She watched him write, moving his hand in a gentle and elegant fashion, before he slid it back to her.

I understand. I didn't want to scare you and add to that. Do you want to sit with me?

Fiona took a moment to collect her thoughts before sliding her purse onto her shoulder. She collected the notebook and her coffee, walking over to sit next to him. "Sorry. I-I just figured if my answer was yes, I didn't want to be redundant.

He nodded in reply. "That's alright. I'm Thomas, by the way."

She smiled. "I'm Fiona."

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself tonight

Thomas crossed his legs, right over left. "So what got you to come out here tonight, Fiona?"

"I-I came for my dad. He normally comes down here but he's sick this year."

"What's your last name?"

"Seville."

The name seemed to click in Thomas's head. "Ah yes, I believe I'm somewhat familiar. Dave's his name, right?"

"Y-Yeah."

"I remember him. We've met in passing before, I believe. The most I know is that he's a composer. Are you in the music industry as well?"

I'll get you out on the floor Shimmering beautiful And when I break, it's in a million pieces

Fiona shook her head. "Not exactly. I'm a barista most days, but I also do children's birthdays and other stuff like that as a costume actor. Sometimes it involves singing, but it's not the bread and butter of what I do."

Thomas smiled. "Impressive. You definitely achieve the Disney princess aesthetic tonight."

She blushed. "Thank you. You look nice too."

Hush, when no one is around, my dear You'll find me on my tallest tip-toes Spinnin' in my highest heels, love Shinin' just for you

The two could hear the bartender turn on the television, and a picture of Thomas without a mask on flashed across the screen as part of a television tabloid, along with his full name.

Mortified, Thomas partly covered his face with his hand.

Fiona looked at him sympathetically, reaching for his empty hand. "Is everything okay?"

Hush, I know they said the end is near But I'm still on my tallest tip-toes Spinnin' in my highest heels, love Shinin' just for you

"I... I have a problem with fangirls sometimes." He held her hand gently. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "D-Don't be." She looked around. "In all fairness, half of the people here look like you because of the masks and everything."

He uncovered his face. "You're not even a little starstruck at me?"

Fiona smiled and shook her head again. "I-I mean, I *do* know who you are now. But... I mostly look at Trend and music industry magazines, so I don't get your exposure a lot."

I want you to know I'm a mirrorball I can change everything About me to fit in

Thomas took another sip of his scotch, contemplating her words. "Well... What is your impression of me, then?"

You are not like the regulars The masquerade revelers Drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten

She looked at him thoughtfully. "I-I think you seem like a hard worker. You have ambitions that aren't always in the realm of reality, but you try. And you make every effort to keep your private life and your work separate. You think art is a second life in and of itself."

Thomas sat silent for a moment, stunned. "And how did you manage to decipher all of that?"

Fiona's smile hinted at a hidden laughter. "You don't seem like you've sold your soul to any towel rack of a tabloid, Mr. Hunt."

He knew the game she was playing now. She seemed to warm up to him quickly, something that could hurt them both if they weren't careful.

But the angle she was going for now? Two could play at that game.

Hush, when no one is around, my dear You'll find me on my tallest tip-toes Spinnin' in my highest heels, love Shinin' just for you

"You'd think correctly, Ms. Seville," he said with a regal and teasing side-smirk. "However, seems it's my turn to pick your brain."

Fiona flushed, almost retreating from the teasing as her fingers on one hand started playing with the edges of her frizzy hair. "G-Go ahead."

Thomas was gentle as he shifted on the barstool, taking a full look at her. "You are definitely in touch with your inner child in a way I don't see often around here. Not necessarily the innocence, but you tap into that with your curiosity, your sincerity, your kindness."

Fiona shied away slightly at the very accurate read of her.

He let her have a moment to recover before continuing to speak. "I would love to have more time to figure you out fully, to get to know you, person to person... if you'll have me."

Hush, I know they said the end is near But I'm still on my tallest tip-toes Spinnin' in my highest heels, love Shinin' just for you

She looked up at him with soft silver-blue eyes, searching herself for the answer as she contemplated his request. "O-Okay. Can some of that time be without a crowd...?"

He smiled. "I know just the place." He took her by the hand and led her out to an open balcony, pulling her into a slow dance as the door closed after them when they got outside. He led her, one arm around her waist and the other holding her head protectively to his chest.

And they called off the circus Burn the disco down When they sent home the horses And the rodeo clowns I'm still on that tightrope I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me

She pulled away from the close embrace, moving to hold his hands again. "I-I..."

Thomas smiled, a patient ease to his posture. "Yes, Fiona?"

"Can we have... more than just tonight to know each other?"

He held her cheek. "I would love nothing more."

And I'm still a believer, but I don't know why I've never been a natural All I do is try, try, try I'm still on that trapeze I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me

In an instant, her lips tilted to reach his.

And nothing else that night mattered for a weightless, ethereal, eternal moment.

Because I'm a mirrorball I'm a mirrorball I'll show you every version of yourself tonight

[e11evenkeys]

Pitch: The Adventures of Danger Rabbit- Chapter 2 Friendly Friendly (part 1)

Long story short, my dad wasn't arrested. Ms. Harper made her displeasure quite clear as far as my new form was concerned, but I wasn't taken away. Because of my mistake, dad had a reputation for being a careless father, and I was seen as a delinquent. Teachers started watching our family like we were career criminals, but dad raised me to be a good kid.

Regardless of the truth, I had a reputation that stuck with me as I grew up. Even into my junior year of high school, kids thought I was bad news. It didn't help that I had the worst luck imaginable, unlike Mr. Nickels, who I still had yet to find. Trouble seemed to seek me out. Just the simple act of walking home from school was dangerous enough to warrant fear of chaos. Freak accidents were a norm, and they only fueled the fire when it came to the negative light everyone shined on me. Of course, my dad always had the worst end of the fiascos because he had to deal with the aftermath.

If I had any luck at all, it was spent when I had the fortune of finding my two best friends.

B James was a girl who moved to town after my accident. Her parents were professional magicians, so naturally, I tried to get in good with them. I had hopes of them helping me. It turns out I didn't have to work too hard. BJ was fascinated with my form and impressed with my ability to create my own magic. I told her I didn't mean to transform myself, but I don't think she cared. She wanted to make new spells like her parents, and I suppose she thought I could help her. She overlooked how the rest of the school avoided me, but that might have been easy, considering no one flocked to her lunch table any more than my own. Remember when I said creating new magic was dangerous, well, BJ didn't care. We hadn't even graduated high school yet, but she'd created more spells than a person could count. It's important to keep in mind most of those spells had adverse effects or didn't do what they were meant to, but they did something.

My friend Wesson, a satyr I met in my freshman year of high school, didn't use magic at all. To be fair Fae, because of their natural abilities, didn't need magic as much as humans did. Even I had natural powers after my transformation like super hearing and invisibility. Which I'm sure is how Mr. Nickels managed to avoid capture for so long if he also possessed the same abilities. Wes being a satyr, was super fast and super strong, among other things, whether he appeared to be or not. We became friends after I tried to join the school's Creature club. There weren't many Fae that went to our school, so the club was meant to be a way of letting them all meet one another. Unfortunately, when I tried to join the club, someone pointed out I was born human, and that I was only what I was because I cursed myself. I couldn't join the club. Technically they weren't allowed to exclude anyone, but I thought it best to pick my battles wisely and let it go. Wes, being the best guy in the world, found me the next day and told me he thought the other kids were dicks for not letting me join the club. From that day on, I couldn't remember a time I couldn't fall back on the friendship Wes and I had.

It was two weeks till summer break. All of the ends of the year testing was out of the way, so everyone was waiting for the school year to come to an end. That Friday afternoon, I decided to walk BJ home. Despite my being close to Wes and BJ both, they never seemed to like one another. Every day I'd have to make a conscious decision whether to hang out with BJ, who loved playing magician and getting into trouble, or Wes, who was basically the brother I never had. BJ won that day because Wes had a meeting with the principal.

BJ should have taken the bus home, but I guess that would have been less time she got to work out new magic with me. We took a lot of back roads that day that eventually spit us out into the Dead Woods. It was the town's biggest forest, and it sat in the middle of everything. We learned in history class that old settlers named it the Dead Woods because back in the early days, when people were still coming up with most of the modern magic, they had to go far away from homes and buildings so bad magic wouldn't destroy anything. A lot of people died out there. Despite the bad history, it was a beautiful place as long as you knew where you were going.

"So there's this summer internship I read about," BJ said as we walked under branches while leaves crumbled under our footsteps.

"What kind of internship?" I asked.

We stopped walking so she could take her spell book out of her bag. The pages of her hand made spiral held weight and took time to flip through.

"For magicians. I thought you might want to go for it," she added.

"You want me to be a magician?"

"You created a working transmutation spell when you were 11."

I laughed at her, calling it a "working spell."

"Yea, and I've been trying to undo it ever since," I said with my amused tone still vocal.

"I could help you."

"I don't want to be a magician," I said in my most definitive voice possible.

"But I do."

I took a few steps away. I didn't want to stand too close while her book was out. Some of the stuff in that thing didn't need words to be activated. As she flipped through the pages, there was a danger similar to throwing a grenade into a kid's birthday party. Pages glowed and faded as her hands turned them over. I'm not sure how she managed to carry something around like that without constantly hurting herself.

"Then you should do it," I said as I crossed my arms and leaned against a tree.

She came near, and I knew to expect puppy dog eyes to fluff some kind of catch. That's what people do when they want something

"I need you."

I asked, "why," but she turned away.

"I need your spell," I thought she said, but I couldn't make out her words for sure, and with my big ears, that meant she was really quiet.

"What?" I asked.

"I need your spell."

I stood up straight.

"The spell that gave me fur and left with only eight fingers," I said before I continued with, " the spell that made my feet too big to wear shoes and ears big enough to hear my dad when he gets off at night."

"I have to submit a working spell to be considered."

"Then use one of yours," I said.

"None of mine work."

"What about the one you use to change your hair color?"

"It blinds anyone who sees me cast it."

"Then just use my spell, you don't need me for that, I wrote the words in some book, and I'll give it to you."

I wanted to get off the subject. Anyone who knew me knew how long I tried to find a cure for my curse. After years of turning over stones to no avail, of course, I gave up hope. That's not to say I didn't wish and dream for a way to change back, but being a bit of a pessimist meant I couldn't help but see the uneasy reality of how unlikely a cure was.

"It wouldn't be right to take credit for your work."

"But, it's alright to strong-arm your friend into an internship that'll take up our entire summer?" I didn't mean to sound nearly as argumentative or sarcastic as I must have at that moment, but it came out that way.

"There's a chance we won't even get it," she said, basically pleading with me at that point.

"If I say yes, will you leave me out of whatever experiments you're about to do?"

"But I had something special planned for today."

"That's my price."

"Deal, but you have to stick around to watch."

"In case something goes wrong?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to," I replied.

We exchanged a mutual grin before she adjusted her glasses and finally flipped around in her book to find the newly crafted spells. We spent most of the afternoon in the woods. BJ wrote a spell for growing plants faster, but it made anything made of wood burst into flames, including all the papers in my backpack. She tried to put out the fires with another spell meant to create rain clouds, but it summoned a swarm of butterflies that flew into the flames. Needless to say, they all died. They died quickly, but at least the fires went out.

By that time, it was getting dark.

"We should get moving," I said as I picked our bags off the ground burnt as they might have been.

"We will never speak of what happened here to anyone, right?"

"Like always," I said with a chuckle before handing BJ her ruined bag.

We started on our way out of the woods.

"Do your parents know you're applying for this internship?" I asked.

"Not yet."

"Don't you think they should know?"

"I'll tell them once I, " she started to say before I cut her off with, "did you hear that?"

"Hear what," she asked.

There was a sound coming from the bushes ahead of us. It was too big to be a cat, dog, or rabbit.

"Stand back," I said as I put my arm in front of BJ.

"Is someone there," I called out into the distance, but no reply was returned.

Only the rustling of the bushes broke the silence as something or someone came near. It was close. There was a momentary pause of nothing but the bugs around us falling silent, and then whatever it was lunged out at me.

It was Wes. He made me fall backward and rip the arm of my button-down shirt.

"Shit," I yelled out.

He tried to catch my arm on my way down, but he was too slow.

"Sorry, dude," Wes said with a laugh as he helped me to my feet.

"What are you doing out here?" BJ asked in a tone more annoyed than me, but I was the one with the ripped shirt.

"I need Pitch."

"Well, he's walking me home from school."

"Schools been out for 3 hours now, and you know how to get home."

"You want me to walk by myself," BJ asked.

"No one ever offers to walk me home, and we're the same age," Wes said sarcastically.

I cut in, "Wes, what did you need my help with?"

"I need your ears," he said.

"Let me get BJ home, and then I'll swing by your place."

Neither of them was even looking at me anymore; they were staring one another down.

"Alright, just make sure 'Bug Burner' isn't with you."

"You saw that!" BJ exclaimed.

"I'll be there, alone," I said as I held BJ back from Wes.

A few uneasy, and unwelcoming glances were exchanged before we took to our separate ways.

"I don't know why you hang out with him," BJ argued.

"Wes is cool," I said.

"Wes is just short of being a toddler. He doesn't use magic."

"I don't use magic."

"That's different; you can't afford it."

"That hurt," I said.

"You know what I mean."

[browneyedmissy]

JV: Childhood Part II

Summary: Her brother was off at college. She had to take care of her siblings. When her schoolwork struggles as a result, she made a friend who only made things more complicated.

Part one here

Author's Note: I actually had this written up already and was supposed to be part of the first half but I somehow wrote too much and Tumblr wouldn't let me post it all at once.

High school took a sharp turn for her.

Without Avi, Jackie was taking care of her siblings more while her parents were at work. She would walk directly from her school when the bell rang to her siblings' schools and then make them a snack when they got home. She was able to start her homework a bit before dinner and she would work some more afterwards to keep up.

There were days where she found herself deeply envious of her classmates. Most of them were involved in clubs after school and sometimes she longed for the normalcy. But that feeling was squelched when she got to school and saw her siblings run up to her with bright eyes and full of love.

She found a deep level of interest in biology and was able to keep up until her junior year when the workload she had in addition to her responsibilities at home began to take a toll on her.

When her parents came home and she wanted to mention something to them about taking less responsibility, she stopped when she saw the weariness in their eyes. She had watched what it was like for them as Indian immigrants who spoke perfect English but with a heavy accent to live in the United States. Sometimes while they were out, the people they interacted would not understand them and she would see her mother hesitate just a fraction of a second and before her mother could turn to her, Jackie would step up.

They had tried for years to open up the store they had back up but after all of the costs, even their combined salary had made it hard to save for what they needed to start it up again.

"We're lucky we have you, beta." Her mother had said with a murmur, smoothing the top of her head.

She would nod and feel the burning of guilt she had of being a normal high school student.

Her grades started slipping and when she saw the C on her math examination, she felt her cheeks burn especially when she noticed that her classmates on either side of her had gotten a B+ and an A-. She suddenly felt like she was an imposter, masquerading as a smart person and that someone was going to come in and kick her out of class at any moment.

"How did you learn how to do those word problems?" Jackie asked the classmate on the left. What was her name again?

"My mom has been helping me. I didn't get them at first and I know most of our classmates have tutors. I can help you after school, if you'd like." She said with a smile.

"I have to take care of my siblings." Jackie said with a grimace.

"Dev and Anika, right? My mom's one of the teachers in the elementary school and Dev was one of her students last year."

She blinked at the girl. How did she know that when this was the first time Jackie had talked to her? "Uhh yeah, I…"

"You don't know my name, do you?" The girl quirked an eyebrow at her. "We've been in classes together since freshman year."

Jackie had the decency to feel embarrassed as she shook her head.

"Alexa Chan." She laughed good naturedly and stuck out her hand. Jackie shook it.

"Jackie Varma."

Alexa gave her a grin. "I know. How about I come home with you and we can work on the homework together?"

-

Her siblings adored Alexa.

The first thing she did when she met them at the school was bend at the knees a little so that she could look them straight in the eye when she shook their hand. Dev's eyes had widened a little and he puffed up his chest as if he was full grown. When Ani asked if she was coming over, Alexa had nodded, telling her that she needed to tell her mom first.

Their eyes had been wide as saucers when they figured out who her mom was.

They had gone to school the next day to tell everyone who would listen that Mrs. Chan's daughter was friends with their sister and she was over at their house.

Her parents liked her as well. She was extended a dinner invitation often and her parents were happy she had found a friend who was smart and capable.

Alexa started coming over twice a week when she didn't have swim practice to help Jackie with math. In return, Jackie helped her memorize her science flashcards.

Alexa wanted to be an engineer, Jackie learned. She was good at math because her mother had taught her how to understand it since she was a kid and she liked looking for patterns. She was an only child so she liked being around her mother's students and around her siblings.

And she was so pretty. Jackie couldn't help but notice her soft her hair looked and how kind and genuine her smile was. Sometimes at night, she had dreams where they were walking down the street, holding hands and no one did a double take when she leaned over and pressed a kiss on Alexa's lips.

She shook her head. Alexa was the only friend she had made in years and she couldn't jeopardize it over a crush.

It wasn't as if she hadn't had crushes before. But she kept her feelings close to her chest, especially when she realized that she might like girls as well. Or prefer girls. The sexuality thing freaked her out because the last thing she needed was for people to stare at her for being Indian and gay.

"Hey, do you want to come watch me swim on Friday? I'm going to be swimming with the varsity team." Alexa said excitedly.

"Yeah, Avi just came home so I can ask him to watch my siblings."

"Ooh yay!" Alexa gave Jackie a hug and pulled back with a horrified expression. "Sorry, I don't think I've ever hugged you before."

Jackie felt her cheeks burning. "We're good."

-

"Avi, I need you to watch Dev and Anika after school on Friday." Jackie said as she got home that day, her two siblings in tow. "My friend is competing in a swim meet."

Avi raised an eyebrow as he looked at her. "You have a friend, behan?"

"Haha." She rolled her eyes. Her brother stared at her before his face broke into a grin.

"You look happy, Jaks." He observed. "Is this friend actually a friend or do you have a paramour, little sister?"

"My friend's name is Alexa." She said, avoiding the subject.

He didn't skip a beat. "She can be your paramour too."

Jackie blinked as she looked at her brother whose face had become very serious.

"I-" She glanced at their siblings who were out of earshot coloring at the table. "I might like her Avi. But she's also the first friend I've made in a long time."

"If you're willing to let her in, then it might be worth exploring."

-

Jackie took a seat in the bleachers, a book perched on her lap and sunglasses on. She could see the girls warming up on the other side of the pool and Alexa grinned and waved when she saw her. She said something to her teammates and walked over her direction and Jackie felt her heart pounding.

"You came! I'm so excited, Coach says I might have a chance at winning first for the butterfly heat." Alexa said brightly. "I'm up against one of the best swimmers, but I've been training hard."

"Good luck." Jackie offered a smile. Alexa offered one in return before heading back to her team.

The swim meet began and Jackie watched as people swam back and forth in the pool. Her eyes were trained to follow Alexa when she swam, the graceful arch of her legs as she jumped off the block and the way her arms moved through the water effortlessly.

Finally, it was time for the event that Alexa was most excited about. As she stepped up to the block, Jackie felt her heart pounding.

"You got this Alexa!" She shouted. Alexa looked up in surprise and smiled back before getting refocused on the pool.

Her opponent pulled ahead of her the first two laps but Jackie noticed she wasn't keeping up the quick pace. Alexa on the other hand had paced herself and was closing ranks. The last lap they were swimming in tandem and as they reached the wall, Alexa pulled slightly ahead and-

"The winner of the heat is Alexa Chan, by 0.02 seconds!"

"Yes!" Jackie shouted in triumph. She ignored the glances she got from the people around her as she ran over to Alexa who threw her arms out for a hug, her eyes bright.

And as Alexa threw her arms around her, without thinking, Jackie pressed her lips against hers. They were soft and she smelled a little like chlorine as she moved her hands to tangle into Alexa's hair-

Jackie didn't notice the stares until she pulled away from Alexa who had a surprised but pleased look on her face. She pulled back and glanced around as people turned and whispered and suddenly, she felt like she was back in 5th grade, introducing herself to her classmates as Jackie Varma.

"Jackie-"

Without giving her a chance to say anything else Jackie turned and fled.

-

She threw herself into her bedroom, rushing past Avi as she reached home. She ignored him calling her name and she threw herself into her bed facedown.

There was a knock on the door.

"Go away."

"Jaks, your friend Alexa called my phone and wants to speak to you."

"I'm not here."

There was a moment of hesitation before Avi said something Jackie couldn't quite make out.

"Okay, I told her you would call later. Can I come in now?"

"Fine." She said muffled into her pillows.

Her brother opened the door.

"What happened?" He asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"Nothing you would understand."

"Behan, I think I of all people would understand."

"No, you won't! You don't live at home anymore, Ani! You don't know what I'm going through and it's easy when you don't have to be around people who know and judge you anymore!"

A terse silence passed. "Do you hate me for leaving? I had to. You'll understand one day. I don't know what you're going through with your friend Alexa, but-"

"I don't want to talk about it! I'm already stared at because we're Indian and I kept my head down through that. I want people to stop staring at me and why can't I just be normal?"

Her voice broke on a sob. Avi sighed and walked over to put a hand on her head.

"Jackie…"

"Don't touch me!" Jackie jumped back and glared at her brother. "Just leave! You're going back to school soon anyways, just- go."

-

She kept her head down for the next few days. Avi had gone back to school and things were sort of back to normal. Alexa had tried to talk to her during class, find her at lunch and after school but Jackie had just stayed silent, staring at the board until Alexa had given up.

Jackie sighed. She missed her best friend but already there were rumors going around the school. They were nosy and Jackie wanted them out of her face.

"You've been avoiding me." Jackie had opened the door to see Alexa standing in front later that day. "Can we talk?"

"Shouldn't you be at swim practice?"

"So you can try to avoid me again? I knew you were keeping track of my schedule. I skipped it. I figured this was kinda important."

"Alexa!" Dev said excitedly when he heard her voice. He moved past Jackie to grab her hand and pull her into the kitchen. "I made a drawing of you and sissy."

Her mouth twitched as she saw the colored drawing. She held it up and Jackie saw two girls, holding hands. Jackie felt her chest tighten.

"Why are they holding hands, Dev?" Jackie choked out.

"They're best friends and they love each other." He said as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

"I-"

"Dev, can you take Ani to the backyard for a bit so your sister and I can talk?" Alexa said softly. "Thank you for the drawing."

He nodded and took Ani outside. When the door closed, she turned back to Jackie.

"Alexa, when I kissed you…" Jackie stammered.

"I wasn't expecting it." Alexa interrupted with a smile. "But I didn't not like it. But you just ran off before I could say anything."

Jackie stared at the girl in front of her.

"I do like you." Alexa said with a shrug. "I don't know what my sexuality is. Still figuring that out. But I do know that you're smart and pretty and my best friend. And I liked kissing you."

"People saw me kiss you." Jackie's face paled.

"Let them talk."

"How are you so casual about this?" Jackie said weakly. "People are going to stare at us. It'll be just like when I was in 5th grade-"

"Jackie. People are going to talk and stare no matter what. We're different from them. Not just because of that kiss but because we're not white."

Jackie felt nausea coming back up. "I can't have people stare. I won't have it. I can't be seen with you."

Her friend blinked and gave her a sad look.

"Okay. I'm not going to fight you on this, Jackie. I know you better than to try that. I'll keep my distance. But… let me know if you need anything."

As Alexa closed the door, Jackie could feel her heart shattering.

-

Her grades dipped again afterwards. Alexa had been a huge help with her siblings and it was hard to concentrate, especially in math when she still sat next to her.

She started feeling angry. She was angry that she was in charge of her siblings in the first place which led her to meeting Alexa.

She was angry at herself for being a coward and not being able to take people staring at her.

"Jackie, I want to talk to you." Her science teacher stopped her one day after class. Jackie dropped her bag on the ground with a huff. "Is everything okay? Your grades are dropping in my class."

"Yup. Fine. Can I go now?"

"Jackie."

"I don't know what you want me to say Ms. Torres. I have to take care of my siblings after school because the program only lasts until 3:30 for them. My parents can't afford to put them anywhere so I have to help out. So why should I give a damn?” Jackie said angrily. “I can't do anything about it, my siblings need me. And people stare at me because I'm different but I can't do anything about it!"

“You’ve been dealt a crappy hand.” Her teacher said with a critical eye before gesturing at a desk in front of her. Jackie gave a huff before sitting down at the desk and crossing her arms. “It sucks that what you want and what your parents want for you is not the same because that puts you at a disadvantage especially against all of your classmates whose parents can do things like afford tutors and know how to get their classmates into college.”

“It’s not fair.”

The words left her mouth before she could swallow them down to join resentment buried deep down in her heart.

“I know.”

Jackie uncrossed her arms, feeling herself deflate. All the anger that she felt mixed with the exhaustion and sadness that she had felt ever since she had realized how much the world hated her when she was nine and she was left just feeling tired.

“Neither of my parents went to college and they both worked full time jobs. And I was expected to take care of my siblings on top of going to school especially as I got older. I did well enough until I got to junior high and all of my classmates started doing things like going to camp and getting tutors to help them get ahead. All of a sudden, I was the Latina girl who was struggling to compete because they had all these advantages.”

"Exactly. If it's not fair, why should I try?"

Ms. Torres observed her quietly for a moment. "Your brother said the same thing."

"Avi?"

"He was one of my first students. He gave me trouble most of the year and then he and I talked just like you did. He told me that you were going to go do advanced classes in junior high and he felt like he missed out on his chance because he had to take care of you and your siblings."

"I didn't know."

"Because he cared about you and Dev and Anika more than anyone. And he got himself together when he realized he wanted to make sure you did more with your life."

Jackie brought her sleeve to her face and it came back wet.

-

"Behan?"

"Hey, Avi. I miss you. And I'm sorry."

He gave a chuckle over the phone. "I wish I had recorded that so I could play it back to you whenever I needed it."

"I kissed Alexa. I might be gay. I don't know. I don't want to label it right now."

"And you don't have to. You do not have to tell anyone, unless you want to, Jaks."

"I want to go to college." Her voice trembled. "I want to be a doctor. I love science and I'm good at it."

"You go do that then." He said firmly.

"Dev and Anika-"

"Will be fine. Mom and Dad will figure it out. You need to make sure you take care of you too."

"Okay. I love you, bhai."