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#I. DONT. FUCKING. CARE.
orpheusilver · 3 months
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god. shinzo abe got his shit wrecked by a goddamn doohickey but the lethal gunshot wound capital of the world cant aim for shit. what the fuck is the second amendment even for
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valtsv · 9 months
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btw if you're going to go down the route of "everyone lives happily ever after, by which i mean gets married and settles down and plenty of kids" at the end of your story then the ONLY right way to do it is to give the villain character a kid as well and have these descendants meet and become best friends before the sins of their fathers inevitably come back to haunt them and turn their innocent childhood friendship into a nightmare psychosexual rivalry in which people are killed
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so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.
and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.
...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.
see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.
while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.
especially if the president of the united states is on board.
yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.
and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."
but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.
...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.
not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.
yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.
but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire
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elfcollector · 1 month
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DRAGON AGE: THE VEILGUARD (2024) — Lace Harding what is happening to me?
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n3rdy247 · 28 days
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i shifted. I ACTUALLY SHIFTED
IT REALLY WAS THAT EASY??? HHAGAHDHHFH???
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puppyeared · 2 months
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horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago
#I DIDNT KNOW I DIDNT KNOWWWWW#when i say damn thats crazy its bc i DO think its crazy i think a lot of things are crazy. like how birds have cloacas#or the way ppl draw a five pointed star in different ways and everyone assumes their way of doing it is how everyone does it#my brother is not letting me live this down btw he literally shouted at me like HOW DID YOU LIVE THIS LONG AND NOT PICK UP ON THAT#IDK!!! IDK I THOUGHT SOMETIMES IT COULD BE USED TO EXPRESS GENUINE SHOCK??????#he says its my delivery that makes it sound insincere bc i say it in a monotonous voice which when i think abt it YEAH....#THAT DOES MAKE IT LOOK KINDA BAD IN HINDSIGHT.....#and then i told him i keep a list of phrases that tickle my brain so i can remember to use them in conversation and apparently#most ppl dont do that bc he was like ???? stop doing that??? just let the conversation flow naturally it sounds fake>????#idk man i feel like if i did that and blurted out 'i forgot people find stuff like underwear arousing for some reason' instead of#smth like 'i wonder what kind of ppl find this kind of stuff the bees knees' like i normally do. it would. not go so well.#ALSO THE FLOW CHARTS ARENT NORMAL? i make flow charts before i call the bank or smth so i know what to say#its not just to blend in its also so i dont waste ppls time going uhhhhh as i think of how i put smth into words#its called stalling for time and i dont care if i have to say smth like thats just how the cookie crumbles if it gives me#5 more seconds to process whatever the fuck someone said without letting them think im not paying attention#doodles#diary#sona#puppysona#comics
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notzawzark · 3 months
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pisting(haha pisting, im not fixin this mistype) for old fandoms is always kinda embarrassing, cause yeaahhh im still rabid about this shit 6 years later
anwyays radical fucking creepypasta art drop
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linkedin-offficial · 3 months
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youll never guess where ive been
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bedforddanes75 · 2 months
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im not american but some of you guys are just fucking stupid ong what do you MEAN youre not gna vote because you disagree with like one part of what youre voting for. like okay me when im fucking thick
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gaykingslayer · 10 months
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"they’re making the dance about alicent and rhaenyra when its supposed to be between brother and sister weh weh weh” god forbid lesbians have anything
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aropride · 1 year
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saw a tweet the other day that was like "outlawing diy hrt would kill trans people" which, yes, i agree. however it is already illegal for trans men. which is something i feel like people just ignore in discussions about diyhrt. i've also seen tweets along the lines of "it's easy to access and dose and it's not explicitly illegal so if you're concerned about us anti trans laws you're being stupid". which, the first part is completely untrue when it comes to testosterone, and the second part shows a mindblowingly uncompassionate view on anti trans legislation and is a genuinely bafflingly horrible thing to say to people who are scared for their lives and their futures
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crustyfloor · 6 months
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I just realized the aliens in this scene tried to get Till to sing my clematis- vivinos. you're going to HELL.
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therealcallmekd · 1 month
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Now THAT'S Thinkin' In 3D!
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HHEHEHEE HAH FLATLAND FANART BE UPON YE
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forsakenmissives · 1 year
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can’t stop crying over arthur loving merlin for merlin. like he fr thought he was just some guy but guess what? that’s his some guy. and he’d stick with him forever. i think i’m gonna throw up
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mazeyphaedra · 6 months
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was rewatching fabian’s baron moment on account of it being the most delicious piece of pvp in my recent memory and ally beardsley’s growth as a player just shone through so brightly and with such clarity. after dusting off their shock they immediately asked about the nemesis ward, had enough knowledge about fellow pcs stocked to remember adaine’s ac with such like frustrated confidence and certainty, suggested to siobhan to dimension door out of adaine’s room, like. they came into this making a character with 4 dex. and now the dice deity offered to roll a check to sense if adaine was in danger. making decisions, asking questions, getting invested in the story, trying so hard with the tools they have to save characters from danger; ally beardsley is an incredible d&d player.
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heartorbit · 2 months
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catch us if you can! ☆
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