#IT'S A *CULTURAL INSIDE JOKE* NOT AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU TO ADMIT YOU THINK WE'RE FREAKS.GO AWAY GRINGOS!!!!!!

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

in jack's perfect reality, what would his relationship with ed be like?

I think it depends on when and what's going on with Jack. Like young 20 something Jack on Hornigold's ship is gonna desire different things from a relationship or lack there of than the more world weary older Jack we see in the show, and there's a question of if he even wants to be with Ed at that point (he certainly wants to fuck him in all situations and universes but most people are not on my he's in love with Ed bandwagon) But I love to chew on, analyze, and crawl inside of the brain of our favoriate Herpes Cowboy so I'll give you a few scenarios. But I'll start out with the consistencies I think there are across all three of these situations.

First of all the similarities. I'm on the he's in love with Ed train through and through, because I like the concept not because I have a lot of evidence to back it up. That being said I feel like Mr. "We're all just in various stages of fucking each other over" is commitment averse shall we say. He and Ed are fuck buddies with an emphasis on buddies and I don't think he wants that to change. Even if they're boyfriends Jack's gonna want to fuck other people and he's gonna want Ed to be able to fuck other people if he so chooses. Second of all Jack's a pirate. One of the pirates ever even. He's gonna want to be doing piracy. If they're not making out during shoot outs with the law it's gonna get too boring. Third he's a party girl, and he wants Ed to party with him.

So I'll start with back when Jack and Ed were young dumb and full of cum. This I think here he and Ed were weathering the storm together and this is before the world chewed them up and spit them out so this is the softest they're gonna get. I do think Jack wants to be softer than he was allowed to be here. He's gross and derranged in all timeframes but I don't think the toxic pirate culture has quite taken root yet. In this time frame his ideal relationship with Ed is straight up boyfriends. He never got it because Ed was too afraid to admit it and he was too afraid to admit it and they were both being taught the hard way to trust no bitch. In reality they are cuddling but only after sex and Jack has to make some fucked up comment about how Ed's such a pansy for wanting to cuddle in order to deflect and seem more macho, but in Jack's mind they're holding hands and going on dates where they skin a rich guy alive together but in a romantic way. And in Ed's mind they're holding hands and going on dates where nobody gets skinned and they do boy best friend activities but while holding hands.

Now what do I think Jack's ideal scenario was when he suggested republic of pirates at the end of episode 8 for his and Ed's relationship? Depends on whether He actually has been mutinied or not but I think either way he does want to take this opportunity to keep Ed around because he likes him. If he's smart he'll decide against it because Ed is potentially a rival pirate captain but we're talking about his perfect world, and I think in his perfect world he and Ed go get a ship together and continue doing piracy and being buddies. However here I don't think he's necessarily looking for the boyfriend angle anymore. He wants to fuck, drink, and hang out. Guys being dudes.

Now. I do want to talk about the dynamic of Jack and Ed if he didn't get mutinied vs if he did. I made this post yesterday in which I considered a new angle to the whole "Whose with me" thing that Jack did to Stede and joked about Jack imagining him and Ed running off with Stede's boat and crew to do Bonnie and Clyde shit. I've been rotating the scenario in my brain ever since (would be out of character for Ed but Jack doesn't know that) Because I've been rotating this post mutiny Jack scenario I think there's two different dynamics for Ed and Jack being boy best friends on the same boat but this time they're in charge. If he didn't get mutinied I think he would want to be the captain and keeping Ed around is an unrealistic fantasy because motherfucker that's Blackbeard, he will have your crew answering to him instead of you in seconds. but we're looking at unrealistic fantasies so, Jack's in charge Ed's on the ship. However if he did indeed get mutinied three times... Well. Izzy's just betrayed Ed so he's out of the picture. And Ed is a very charismatic captain, and can definitely keep a crew on his side, something that thrice mutinied Jack has failed at. I think he's looking to slot himself in as Ed's second in command and use his shiny new "guy who's fucking blackbeard" card to get away with causing as many problems as he wants and partying all day and doing absolutely no work.