#Jock stim | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hotluncheddie · 10 months

Text

high masking autistic steve snippet - a follow on from this and this

wc: 2.5k | rated: T | cw: none | tags: autistic steve harrington (and eddie but again this is about steve), hurt/comfort, established relationship, stimming

ao3

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Steve is spending the evening doing one of his new things. Where he takes time to just be. It’s recovering, or Stevie time, or whatever Eddie and Robin have decided it should be called.

He’s alone basically, and it’s nice, because he’s letting it be nice. Letting it be restful.

It’s for when he’s had a meltdown. Or can feel one coming on, because now he’s starting to recognise what overstimulation feels like on his skin. How it prickles at the back of his neck if his breaks cut short, makes his vision vignette if something too unexpected happens.

Learned that after something like that he’ll need to rest. Needs time.

And it’s not lazy. It’s not. (Sometimes it still feels like it is.) (Weak…that word always plays in the deep, scathing tone of his father’s voice…and selfish.)

He’s on the couch, it’s dark, he actually feels really comfortable, and he’s watching The Breakfast Club. Watching it again. It’s his favourite, it feels like his. But he doesn’t like watching it with other people because they might notice how much he likes it and he doesn’t want that. Can’t be seen like that.. Embarrassing.

So he watches it alone, when he gets home from work. He pauses whenever he wants, rewinds, pauses. Takes a deep breath, rewinds, pauses, stares into space.

He also pauses to eat the snack he brought in. Actually tasting the food bc it’s the only thing he has to focus on. No lights, no sounds. He forgot how much he likes oranges when they’re ripe. Harder to taste if he has to listen at the same time. So, on a day like today, he lets himself do stuff one step at a time.

It’ll probably take him double the normal run time to get all the way to the end. But who cares? It’s his time.

The weird girl’s parents driving off; that feels like him. The jock’s Dad letting him off easy; that doesn’t feel like him. ‘No schools gonna give a scholarship to a discipline case.’ Maybe that does feel like him. Before through. A long time ago now.

He claps sometimes. Keening high in his throat, a little happy hum that he only lets himself do when he’s alone like this. He does it after he whistles the same tune they do. And during the scene of them running around the corridors. It’s exiting. Makes his lips stretch wide and his feet flap around. He claps. Once. Twice. It feels good.

He laughs at the characters. How they merge together with bits of his friends. He feels that swell of happy sad emotion looking at the jock when he first comes in, acting above the others, only seeing Molly Ringwald. He lives through a couple flashbacks of himself. Resigns to actually watch them, sit in them, begins to process who he was. Who he’s becoming now. Something like forgiveness tasting sweet on his tongue. He cries a little; that swelling and shifting as buried emotion finally passes. It overcomes him sometimes when he lets his mind relax.. He rewinds, and he laughs.

“Stevie?”

Steve starts, fingers tangle in the blanket in his lap. Brain slow to process the change, the information. Eddie slipping through the door and coming over to him. Eddie dipping to look at Steve’s face, trying to catch Steve’s eye. Eddie smelling like cigarettes and crisp autumn air, it’s nice, but, it’s a lot. Panic sits bubbling somewhere in him. He wasn’t expecting this.

“…Eddie?”

“Hey sweetheart. I know you had a shitty day, but Wayne’s at home with a headache and he needs to sleep it off. Wouldn’t’ve been able to stay quiet enough for him.”

Steve breaths in and out a little quickly. Eyes wide.

Maybe it’s okay. Eddie knows he had a bad day. Maybe it’s okay.

“I’ll sit in the kitchen, work on my campaign, just forget I’m here.” Eddie speaks quietly, almost a whisper.

He stares at his hand in his lap. “..You won’t, listen?” Steve feels small. Knows he’s not, his frame broad and strong. But, he needs small. Wants his world small tonight, slow. Wants to stay hidden. Him and the couch and the film and nothing else.

Eddie just shakes his walkman and smiles (in that pointy way that makes Steve’s toes curl).

“Kay” Steve whispers, still wary, off kilter. But accepts the kiss Eddie drops on his head, tangling their fingers together for a breath. Steve leans forward for a kiss on the lips. It’s deep, and lovely. Steve can smell Eddie’s cologne. Feels where the chill bit at Eddie’s nose. He shivers.

“No cooking.” Steve mumbles while their lips are still close. Small smile pulling at his face, eyes sharp, waiting for Eddie to get it.

Eddie groans quietly in embarrassment but his eyes are soft and molten and Steve’s toes curl up again. “Course not baby, not again. Once you’re hungry just come through, yeah? Make us something nice.”

And the light of the kitchen doesn’t reach the couch. And Eddie listens to his walkman loud. And Steve’s safe. It’s Eddie. He’s not listening. Steve’s safe.

His favourite scene; Bender and Claire in the stock cupboard. The way he looks so shocked, the way she bites her lip. ‘Why’d you do that?’ ‘Because I knew you wouldn’t.’ Steve whispers as they do. Claps. It’s such a good scene. He’s exited. He claps again. Rewinds to just watch her face. Rewinds to just watch his. Rewinds and watches the whole scene again. Wraps his arms around his middle and squeezes. Pauses on the kiss. He rubs his fingers agains his mouth. Giddy excitement bubbles in his belly. He hums high and happy again. He loves this movie.

The weird girl gets a makeover, the jock really likes it. He feels like the weird girl sometimes, maybe Eddie can be his jock. Maybe he should get a makeover. Maybe keep growing out his hair. Maybe Eddie would like that.

The credits roll. Bender’s fist in the air. Steve drifts on the couch, eyes closed. He breaths deep, his stomach growls.

He pads through to Eddie. Squinting. Too bright. “D’you mind?” He motions to the lights, his eyes too adjusted to the dark and he doesn’t even wanna try and adjust them back.

‘‘Cause. What we making?”

Steve hums, goes into the pantry to see what’s easy. Eddie slips in behind him, hand on his waist. “Pasta?” Steve asks but Eddie doesn’t reply, just turns him gently. Nudging him to step back into the corner.

Eddie looks at him, dips forward to place a slow kiss on his neck. “Why’d you do tha..’ Steve’s words dry up in his throat.

“Because I knew you wouldn’t” and Eddie’s eyes are sparking with glee.

Eddie heard him.

He listened.

Steve’s feels himself flush hot, embarrassed and ashamed. “Ah, I, uh.” He can’t explain it, why he had to watch it so many times, why it makes him so exited. He crosses his arms over his chest. Turns back to the shelves of food and picks a can at random. Shoving out of the room.

“Steve?”

Eddie said he wouldn’t. He listened in on him. He said he wouldn’t. He’s making fun of him. Steve knew he should’ve told Eddie to go home.

“Stevie? What’s wrong?” But Steve doesn’t want to talk to him. He’s so angry, So ashamed, of himself. What if Eddie heard him clap too, heard him make that high noise, like a fucking baby, like some freak.

He puts the can on the counter with way too much force, corn, not what he fucking wanted. His hands are shaking. He stares at them, wills his tears to stay behind his lash line. He got too comfortable, he can’t do that. Why is it so hard to pretend now, when it used to be so easy.

“Steve, tell me what I did, please.”

“‘M fine” Steve’s insides feel too big, pushing against his skin, itchy all over. He squeezes himself around his middle again, digging his fingers in hard.

“Don’t do that, you know I hate when you bullshit like that.” Half lovely, half scathing.

The word stinks, a stab to the gut. But Steve gets it, he does, they talked about it. He bites his lip, hard.

Its old habits or whatever. Because Steve, he loved fine. Liked sinking his teeth into it; toxic waste green coating his mouth and lungs. Thick and delicious. Because fine gets you out of it. Fine gives you translucency. Controlled balance. Everything appearing a none issue, the perfect in-between. Steve was perfect at coming off as something to not worry about, someone to be ignored. It used to work in all situations; can’t get told off if you’re fine, cant do anything wrong, teachers didn’t look twice, his parents wouldn't shout. By staying half alive, never letting anyone too close, never filling your lungs up all the way. That was the fine Steve adored.

“You were literally just watching a movie. I dunno what the big deal is.” and there’s frustration, confusion, in Eddie, Steve thinks. He feels himself tense up, glance over.

Eddie must see something on his face. See that scared little animal prowling around within him. Because Eddie softens, his voice gentle. “Steve.. it’s nothing I hadn’t heard before.’ And Steve’s teeth clamp together with a click. He’s done that, his clap and his high hum, in front of Eddie before? Steve tries to swallow, he can’t, a lump too big and sticky in his throat.

He can’t look him in the face, angry tears still threatening to spill “You said you wouldn’t listen.” He’s mumbling. He sounds even more like a kid. Stupid. Grow up.

“I heard a little but I was just flipping the tape over, I wasn’t trying to snoop on you Stevie… You just, you sounded happy.”

Steve huffs. Glances at Eddie. That soft underbelly of his whining, because with Eddie, Steve yearns. Yearns for close. Yearns to be seen, and understood.

“You didn’t mean to?”

“No, it was just when I was turning the tape.”

Steve forces a deep breath.

“You think I’m weird. You hate me.” He whispers it like it’s true. A big part of him believes it, his tears welling up. Feels rejected. Knows that feeling too well. Hates it.

“Always like you Steve. Always.”

Steve grunts, a tear slips out, rolls down his cheek.

“‘M embarrassed” comes out like an ugly sob. Steve scrubs his palms on his cheeks, feeling how red hot they are. Glaring at the countertop. “I’m embarrassed!” But it’s just Eddie. It was just Eddie.

Eddie comes over, slowly draping himself over Steve’s back. “Nothin' to be embarrassed about, love.” And Eddie leaves soft kisses on Steve’s neck, squeezes his waist. “You looked cute on the couch like that. Like it when you’re happy.” Steve tries taking another deep breath but it shudders.

Embarrassed, angry, sad. Embarrassed, confused, angry. Frustrated, embarrassed. Tired.

Emotions wash over him. He’s learning to try and just feel them, name them, pick them apart. Some bubble back up to the surface, some only needed to be seen once.

Steve turns to bury his face in Eddie’s neck. He sighs, rubs his face into Eddie’s warm skin. shaking his head, likes how his lips feel moving against edie’s soft parts.

Tired, hungry, embarrassed, hungry.

“’M tired. I dunno what to eat.” He whispers, and then because he said it it’s like there’s space in his brain. “Want pasta.”

“Pasta it is then. And then we can sleep, yeah?” Eddie rocks them gently side to side, kisses the side of his head and slips away. Goes to get the box from the pantry, puts the corn back. Steve gets a pot out of the cupboard.

Staring into the water, the tips of his fingers prickle. Steve fizzes with energy and emotion. All pent up and annoying him. Needs it out. He clicks the flame on.

He starts pacing around the kitchen island. In big striding, stomping steps. “Ugh! You think I’m weird. Some weird guy who acts weird and does weird shit.” Steve grumbles. Annoyed. He smacks his palm quick and hard against the counter top. Keeps stomping.

Eddie comes back and starts following. Stomping and prancing like some court jester. “I like that you’re weird! You know, I have one episode of the Twilight Zone taped. It’s my third one. I watched the other two so much the tapes broke.’ Steve lets a little shout slip from him “Ha!” bubbly and forceful. Dislodging something within him. Like when a tooth finally falls out.

Feels good.

“I only like one brand of spaghetti hoops. Wayne once bought me a multipack for Christmas. Best fucking gift I ever got.” and Steve’s laughing now. Giggling and manic and still stomping around the island.

“I like how it feels to brush my teeth. I’ve never had a filling. I fucking love brushing my teeth, Eddie.” and that makes Eddie laugh now too. Two freaks stomping around the kitchen. A king and his jester, lit up by moonlight.

Steve turns the corner and stops short, still giggling. Eddies bent at one knee, presenting the box of pasta to him. “My liege.”

Steve claps, hums, high and keening. The waters boiling.

“How’d you feel now?’ Eddie asks around a mouthful of cheesy pasta.

Steve curls up tighter into the corner of couch, wraps both hands around the warm bowl. Glances at Eddie across from him. “Still kinda embarrassed.”

Eddie looks so soft, so kind, across from him. “I’m embarrassed too, to be honest. You love that movie, I thought you’d like me doing that. Kinda like when we, when we kissed upside-down, like I was Spider-man” Eddies sentence get quieter towards the end, mumbly, spoked into his bowl, cheeks dusted pink.

Steve strains to hear him. Smiles once he puts the words together.

He shovels pasta in his mouth. Eyes closed. “You are so annoying Eddie Munson. Why’d you even come here tonight, you coulda gone anywhere.” Steve sinks further into the couch, it’s really good pasta.

“Missed you.” Eddie says it like it’s simple, easy, and warmth drips over Steve’s skin.

Eddie clears his throat, Steve feels him fidget. “Wanna maybe.. You think we could live together one day? Want you to be able to do whatever you want with me around Steve. Breakfast Club on all the time at our place, kay?” And Steve’s throat constricts, that’s a big change, living with someone, moving out. But maybe with Eddie it could be okay, if they did it together, slow.

“Yeah, kay. One day.” Softly, bit by bit. Little bits. Steve can get there. Let Eddie in, let Eddie see. “But no to Breakfast Club on all the time.” Because some times, some days, some things, are just for him. Steve needs it that way. And that’s okay.

He stretches out further on the couch, feeling syrupy and nice, easy smile playing at his lips. “I like it when you kiss my neck though, you can do that again.” And that makes Eddie grin all pointy, put their bowls to the side and crawl over him.

Steve’s toes curl and he hums, high and happy.

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

tagging those who asked mwah! @2jug2head @lil-gremlin-things

but also people who i think might be interested (sorry if ur not lmk and i won't again) @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @pearynice @steventhusiast @sugarcookiesteve @spectrum-spectre @irethsune

#hope u enjoy!!#autistic steve harrington #steddie #steve x eddie #hotlunch #my fic #once again #steve harrington needs a hug #and once again #he gets one #lmk if u liked it #i can’t tell u how many times i’ve watched the breakfast club dude #there’s just something about it

397 notes · View notes

jangofettjamz · 9 months

Text

Short And Shy

Tara Carpenter x Autistic!Male!Reader

Summary: You were an inch shorter than Tara and extremely shy. She absolutely adored you for it.

Warnings: Description of autistic meltdown

Requested by: @d-epicplayz1028

Words

3rd person POV

Today was stressful on Y/N, a bad mental health day to be specific. Y/N lived by a simple schedule. He'd wake up, get ready for college, ride to school with his girlfriend, learn and spend the rest of the day with her. This would hardly waver from its course, but he was content with that. However, unfortunate events would impede on that schedule.

Tara and Y/N walked hand in hand down the halls of their college, the glares of students did not go amiss by the couple. They watched them; stared, most of envy, jealousy and the occasional resentment. Not that it bothered them of course, at least not Tara. Y/N wasn't fond of all the attention he was getting.

They found their place in their seats, each offering a warm smile to the other, filling them with a sense of warmth and comfort that only such a loving smile could offer.

Though, that sense of warmth quickly dissipated when one of the jocks and his friends burst through the door with a boom box in hand, blasting loud music that bounced across the lecture hall walls.

Y/N winced as the sound waves from the speakers invaded his ear drums. Tara took notice of the discomfort his face had displayed and moved to cover his ears with her hands, her thumbs moving in circular motions across his temples in an effort to calm him.

The lecturer was too busy reprimanding the boys who had interrupted his class to even notice the couple. He spouted something about having the boys expelled if they attempted a stunt like that again, Tara didn't really care for what he had to say, keeping jer focus solely on her lover.

Y/N began babbling incoherently, a symptom of overstimulation from loud noises. People were starting to look at the two of them and starting to whisper, not helping the situation at all. He could feel all the eyes on him, like the whole world's gaze set itself on him, to mock and belittle him.

He felt as though his throat had closed up, cutting off any potential communication. His senses were in overdrive, the smell of the mahogany chairs he sat on invading his nasal passages. His clothes felt wrong, the material itching his skin, too irritable to go unnoticed. Tara put two and two together, he was gonna have a meltdown.

Tara kept whispering sweets words to her partner "Shh shh shh, it's okay baby. You're okay, my love. Can I hold you? Would you like to be held right now?" The boy nodded desperately, wanting the warm embrace and comfort from her. She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into her lap and began rocking him, a technique that proved to be quite effective at calming him.

The lecturer finally took notice of the couple and demanded to know why the sound of cries were present. "Ms Carpenter what is going on?" He asked impatiently after having to deal with the jocks.

"Y/N is having a meltdown, may we be excused?" The lecturer nodded, likely not wanting to argue anymore than he had to. Tara picked Y/N up and carried him out of the classroom, his shorter stature allowing this to be possible.

She hurried out of the classroom with him in her arms, ignoring the numerous voices talking about them. Y/N keeps his legs around her waist and his face in her neck while she carries him to her car, weak sniffles are heard by Tara, making her even more mad at the jocks who caused this.

Once they made out of the building Tara sets him down and opens the car door for him, he hastily gets in and shuts the door, stimming to try and regulate himself. Tara takes her place in the drivers seat and holds him for a few more minutes, carding her fingers through his scalp.

"Stupid jocks, aren't they" She says to which he mumbled out a sound in agreement, still unable to verbally communicate properly. "Let's go to my place. Is that okay?" He nodded again, prompting Tara to buckle up and he the same.

- 20 minutes later

Tara turned the key to open the front door to her apartment, it was there they were met with Sam. She was going to greet Y/N, but thought twice when she saw his current state. She went for it anyway "Hey buddy, what happened?" She says expressing deep concern.

He looked to Tara to speak up for him, she got the message and spoke up. "Some asshole and his friends blasted music in our lecture. He got overstimulated so I took him out of there." She explains, he held her hand a little tighter, his head nestled against her chest.

Sam cooed out of sympathy "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me" she says and he smiles at her words which she happily returned.

Tara kept repeating sweet words to him, making him feel safe. Y/N felt the environment around him become warmer with each word that came out of her mouth, comforting him I'm the best way possible. "You're doing so good baby, you're safe now. Nothing can get you here. No stupid jocks, no loud music, just you and me" he felt at home, she felt like his home; a safe space.

She looked down at him, taking note of his features, admiring him. He saw this and his cheeks went beat red. She giggled mischievously, knowing the effect she has on him. She placed a kiss on his forehead and the heat in his cheeks rose to new heights.

Her hands worked his body, one in his hair and one rubbing his back and arms. He kept his hands in his sleeves due to the shyness he was experiencing. Tara kept placing kisses on his head, loving the way he reacts to them.

"Are you feeling a little shy, baby?" He nodded, then yawned, tired from the meltdown earlier. "Shy and tired I see. Wanna take a nap for me?" A part of him wanted to protest, though, he knew that she was right and that he needed rest.

He nodded his head, eyes half open. She took upon herself to carry him to bed, showing her impressive strength despite being 5'1, though he was inch or two smaller than her.

She placed him on her bed, looming over him like a guardian angel. She draped the blanket over his small frame like a protective shield from all the bad things in the world and kissed his forehead with love and passion "Sleep tight, sweet boy. I love you"

And just like that he was out like a light. Tara stayed by his side as he slept, holding his hand knowing her presence alone brings him great comfort.

She was never leaving him. Ever.

#jenna ortega x y/n #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x you #male reader #jenna marie ortega #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x y/n #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter

164 notes · View notes

munsonshire · 6 months

Text

Autistic Eddie

Disclaimer: these are just headcanons, obviously every autistic individual is different. Also, if you're an ableist just go away, this is obviously not for you

Main Masterlist

Eddie Masterlist

- Hates change of plans - for proof you have season 4 ep 1 when Dustin tells him to postpone Hellfire club.

- He's weird, he knows it and doesn't give a f about it - doesn't care about not fitting in and takes pride in not fitting in.

- Completely shocked about Steve not fitting into the stereotype that he was taught about jocks and popular people at school.

- Applies his interests (dnd, Lord of the rings) to make decisions or comprehend reality (that's so relatable tbh)

- Avoid eye contact in most situations, especially if he's sad or upset about something, like when they found him at the boat house

- Doesn't know what personal space is (him walking with Steve in the Upside Down)

- Compliments based on special interests and will get super excited when he talks about it

- Doesn't respond to his name right away and takes a bit more time to process sounds, like when Stevie was calling him while walking through the forest in the Upside Down

- Has safe foods, like what he asked Nance and the rest to bring to him

- Has a hard time processing emotions, especially frustration

- Struggles with school but he's very intelligent in other ways, I also have this hc that he purposely fails the same course over and over because he's scared of stepping into the real world, but that might just be me.

- Sometimes, when talking to other people he knows that something's wrong but he doesn't know what to do like at all.

- Hates being touched without a warning. That's why I hate the hc where people say that he will let you touch his hair while dating or even as friends, my guy doesn't like to be touched, nope, not at all. And he will let you for a very very short period of time if he trusts you

- Happiest around his special interests, aka playing with his band and dnd.

- Very protective over his interests

- He stims all the time, usually touching his hair r his face, seriously, just watch his scenes, come back and tell me i'm right

- Can't stay still

Tags: @ali-r3n @vicuriousghost @fhaf123

#eddie stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson headcanon #autistic eddie munson #autistic eddie munson headcanons #eddie munson masterlist #masterlist!eddie munson #eddie munson!masterlist

48 notes · View notes

beep-beep-robin · 1 year

Text

tw: meltdown, harmful stimming, slight internalized ableism below the cut

eddie‘s hellfire shirt‘s seen better days. the print is coming off, it‘s starting to smell old - even when wayne‘s finally succesfully forced eddie to take it off for a day so he can wash it.

the day eddie accepts that it‘s probably time to throw it away, he has a meltdown. he‘d been wearing this shirt for years now, not everyday, but almost. it‘s his one piece of clothing that he‘d always felt comfortable in, the only thing he could wear on bad days without feeling like he was gonna have to throw up.

so now he‘s sitting on his bed, wearing the shirt, rocking back and forth and pulling on his hair, trying to reason with himself - the shirt‘s old, he could make a new one, it‘s gross - but it‘s no use. his brain is in emergency mode.

he‘s so focused on his panic and anger at himself, that he doesn‘t hear the knock on the door before it opens. steve walks in, sees eddie in distress, and immediately drops to the floor to kneel in front of the bed, looking up at eddie with concern visible on his face.

steve asks what‘s happened, but eddie can‘t seem to find any words. he just points at his shirt, points out the print, fingers trembling, before his hand goes back to pulling at his hair.

somehow steve manages to understand and calm eddie down a bit. eddie is aware that steve‘s making empty promises, he won‘t be able to get him a shirt that‘s the same as the one he‘s wearing now. even if he buys the exact same shirt, eddie knows that it‘ll feel different to him because it‘s newer, from a different batch, just plain different. the print isn‘t the issue, because he can just pop that onto the shirt himself.

still, hearing steve talk to him in a calming voice, reassuring him that everything‘s going to be fine and that he will actively try to help eddie get the same shirt back, it helps. he calms down just enough to stop torturing his hair, looking at steve’s face properly now for the first time since he’d walked in. the thought that even though eddie just basically lost his mind in front of steve and is probably covered in snot and tears, the latter is still looking at him with pure relief, love (platonic. eddie’s not trying to get his hopes up even further) and something else eddie can’t interpret on his face, makes eddie’s heart flutter.

eddie‘s not the biggest fan of being touched during and after a meltdown, and steve knows that (they‘d been hanging out for a while, and steve‘s witnessed another meltdown just weeks before), so they just sit side by side on his bed after he‘s come down from it, the metalhead nursing the tea steve‘s made him.

eddie‘s positively shocked when steve shows up again the next day to hand him a hellfire shirt. by the smell eddie can tell it‘s probably gareth‘s, and eddie could kiss steve for the genius idea of retrieving one of the other shirts that he‘d bought for the original members of the hellfire club (maybe that’s not the only reason he‘d kiss him though but eddie‘s going to keep that to himself). it smells different, slightly like gareth and a bit like steve, but it feels the same and it‘s much less worn than eddie‘s, because gareth didn‘t live in it as much as eddie did in his, apparently.

the relief that washes over eddie is immense. for a second he doesn‘t even know what to say, so he just throws his arms around steve in absolute disbelief at having someone apart from his uncle in his life that cares so much about the stupid little things that upset him that he’d go to these lengths to fix them.

especially steve. eddie was pretty worried about scaring the ex jock off when he started unmasking around him, but their friendship (?) just grew even stronger and steve‘s turned into the one person he can always turn to when things go south.

releasing each other from the hug, steve squeezes the others shoulders and tells eddie to go put the shirt on, but the latter is still thinking about his first instinct from a few moments earlier. he thinks of the expression on steve‘s face that washes over it so often when he‘s looking at eddie, no matter what the other is doing.

he thinks of accidental touches of hands, knees brushing together, hugs that last longer than they normally should. thinks of how caring steve is, how accepted and loved he makes eddie feel.

his eyes flicker down to steve‘s lips, back up to his eyes, and apparently steve is right there with him because he asks eddie if he can kiss him - and there’s that look again. eddie just nods and then they‘re kissing and his brain is struggling to catch up with what just happened but for a moment everything‘s perfect and eddie‘s, once again, in disbelief.

when they break apart, there‘s nothing but steve, steve, steve and he barely catches it when the other says that he‘s really been wanting to do this for a while now.

and all eddie can say to that is yeah, me too.

202 notes · View notes