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kagedbird · 13 days

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Cicero Loves You, Listener!

TESSDE AU - Dark Brotherhood route

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This was going to be… rough. To adjust to.

Something inside my stomach wanted to puke at the thought of being in a den of murderers, but I felt like my hands weren’t clean either. I couldn’t remember if I was like them or not, so I wasn’t sure I had any right to judge.

Not only that, but the Night Mother chose me. That clearly had to account for something, regarding my life. Right?

Either way, I was definitely treated like an outsider by the rest of the ‘family’ despite my supposed position. Only two people outside of Cicero really cared that I was Listener and addressed me as such— that being Babette, the vampire, and Festus Krex, the older man. Both were old enough to remember and adhere to the ‘old ways’ of the religious creed, but not everyone was so quick to fall back to the ancient ways.

Astrid especially. I could feel her cold, distrusting glare everywhere from the moment I stepped out of Mother’s sanctuary. She was clearly waiting for me to make a misstep, of any kind, so she had an excuse to take me out. Cicero warned me plenty enough to not linger near ‘the harlot’ for long.

It was mean, but hearing Cicero call her a harlot definitely made me snort. I had to ‘suffer’ through him trying to get me to do it repeatedly during meal time, much to the despair of my aching sides.

At the moment, I was seated next to Gabrielle as she stitched the last threads into the cloth of my new uniform. I was to match the others in their red and black colour scheme. Something inside felt fond at the colour duality— maybe I’d worn this before? Did I used to belong to another sanctuary?

Those three men in my dreams certainly didn’t wear the colours or anything regarding the family’s design…

I’d dreamt of them repeatedly since the first time. Flickers in time that didn’t really make sense, feelings and emotions I couldn’t really grasp. I think past me was infatuated with them, to some degree. Or she just held a lot of love for them in her heart.

Would they like this new me? Did they still exist?

Perhaps I could ask Night Mother where they were…

“You’re very quiet.” Gabrielle said suddenly, startling me from my thoughts. Curiously, I looked up to her in question, and she smiled. “Sorry. I suppose I was expecting another one like Cicero— er, the Keeper. Loud.”

“I can be.” I said, slowly shrugging. “But I feel like I’ll be threatened with another knife if I am.”

Gabriella laughs, a tinkling sort of sound leaking from her lips. “I think you might be right. I do apologize for it. I for one am glad we have another woman. It’s nice to have some company.”

I smile, feeling assured by her comment. It didn’t feel like she had any ulterior motives to tack on either. Just genuine want for camaraderie.

“Have you been recovering well, under the Keeper’s care?” She asked curiously, eyes flicking back down to her work.

“Yes. Cicero is very… attentive.” I settled on, glancing at where he was in the sanctuary. He was tending to Mother right now, oiling her preserved body.

I didn’t envy the task, I’ll be honest. Not to be disrespectful in any way. But it was… mildly unsettling, as was everything in regards to this guild.

“Attentive is a word for it.” Gabriella huffed quietly. “Just say the word if you need a hand, okay? I don’t mind at all.”

“Thank you. I might take you up on that.” I nodded. “I’ve been feeling this sharp pain in my thigh for a while, and I worry something isn’t healing right.”

“Oh! I’ll see to it after this.” Gabriella said, nodding firmly.

“Thank you.” I murmured, settling my back against the rough chair. It was nice to have a companion other than Cicero. You could only talk about the same five things so many times before it became tiring.

Gabriella’s smile widened as she swiftly stitched the pants in her lap. “Cicero said you were a polite one. I can only wonder how long it’ll last here.”

“Pardon?” I asked, confused. “...Does no one thank anyone here?”

“Well, of course we thank each other,” Gabriella admits, looking a bit sheepish. “But… no offense to you or your position, Listener, but you are… new.”

Ah.

“I’m sorry you all get third degree.” I offer simply, dipping my head respectfully. “While I’m still… lightly disquieted about the tasks that are given, I’m sure they aren’t given without thought. Otherwise, we’d just be killing anyone and everyone, wouldn’t we?”

“As much as Sithis might enjoy having so many souls brought to him in the Void, if everyone were to die, no one would be alive to kill.” Gabriella remarked dryly. “So, yes, you’re right on that one.”

“And…” I pause, looking around to make sure no one would hear, sheepishly glancing back at the elven woman. “...Everyone does their best to remain respectful of the dead, right?”

“Well… I cannot attest to everyone,” Gabriella admits, but gives a small shrug. “I certainly try to. Death is but the time to sleep forever, in the Void, after all. I assure that everyone has a good rest when it’s their time.”

“That’s all I can hope for.” I murmured, squeezing my shorts tightly. “Death isn’t something that should be taken lightly. Murder isn’t to be done lightly. I… I don’t remember what I’ve done, but I don’t feel clean. But I do know I had to have had my reasons. Regardless of the hefty price that was paid.”

Gabriella turns to me and stares deeply into my eyes. I do my best to maintain the eye contact, letting her search for whatever she wished.

“...How strange for the Night Mother to choose someone so… estranged to killing.” She eventually murmured, eyes tight. “One would think she would settle on a serial murderer. Or someone with the taste for blood.”

“Maybe she looks for restraint.” I offer. “You said it yourself, with everyone dead, there’s no one alive to kill.”

She hummed, keeping her stare for a few moments longer, before turning to the clothes on her lap once more. With a flourish, she tightens the thread and cuts the remaining string off, smoothing the cloth down.

“It’s done. Shall we adjourn to your room to see about your leg?”

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

She chuckled again, standing tall and helping me stand with a smile across her lips. “Ever so polite, Listener.”

“As if you’ve been nothing but kind yourself.” I countered with a grin, enjoying her laughter that followed.

“I wonder.”

I followed after Gabriella, slow as I was with a limp in my gait, and entered into the sanctuary with a wave to Cicero.

“Hello Keeper.” Gabriella greeted cooly.

“Hello, hello! And hello to you, sweet Listener!” Cicero said, smiling wide. “Come to pay respects to the Night Mother?”

“Maybe after Gabriella checks my leg,” I offered, giving him a weaker smile in return. “It’s been burning a lot lately, and I’ve been worried—”

Cicero gasped, looking down right appalled. “And you have not mentioned this to Cicero? Your dutiful, helpful, dearest Cicero?!”

I shrunk slightly, feeling properly admonished, and forced myself not to scuff my foot. “I… feel more at ease with a woman checking, Cicero. No offense to you or your capabilities at all. I just…”

Cicero stared heavily before letting out a dramatic sigh and turned back to the Night Mother. “Woe is me, dearest Mother! If only I had been born a woman, so as to take proper care of our dearest Listener! Woe, I say!”

I smiled wider, feeling a little more at ease at his goofy speech. “It’s just my leg, Cicero. You’ve helped with literally everything else, and I’m very grateful. I don’t want to keep having to lean on your kindness though.”

“So the Listener keeps saying.” Cicero sighed again, wiping his hands on a dry rag. “Perhaps the Listener should be the Keeper instead with how often she keeps poor Cicero.”

I laugh, shaking my head. “I would be a poor Keeper indeed. That job is yours, hon. You do a great job of it, and I know Mother is grateful for your efforts.”

“She is?!” Cicero squawked, turning to me sharply. “Has she said? Has she? Oh please, dearest Listener! Tell poor Cicero what she has said!”

“Um…” I blink in surprise, but feel myself soften at his urgency. He’s been without her voice and as her Keeper for so long. Like any child, he’d long to hear her praise…

“My dearest Keeper… though he longs to hear my voice, it does not belong to him. He is the Keeper after all.” Mother’s voice rang in my mind, making me snap to her coffin. The subtle red… “His loyalty, above all, brings his Dread Lord father and I the greatest of joy. As all of our children do.”

I smile, feeling my heart squeeze a bit. Reassured by this… matronly comfort that settled in my chest. It soothed an ancient ache I couldn’t recall. I’m not sure what, but it was definitely nice to hear the subtle compliment to myself.

“...She says you’re a wonderful, loyal Keeper. And that she and Father are proud of you.” I said softly, finally turning my eyes to see Cicero blinking back tears with a fervent relieving grief. A mixture of emotions swirling on his face as his hands clenched tightly by his sides, scrunching up the rag in his right hand.

I felt the urge to go to him. I wasn’t sure if it was Mother’s prodding, or a sense of my old self ushering me, but I strode forward and brought him into a tight hug, rubbing his back softly.

“Silence has ended, my Brother…”

“Welcome home.”

#skyrim #tesblr #tes oc #Cicero skyrim #Gabriella skyrim #Night Mother #Allora #Dragonborn oc #TESSDE AU #Dark Brotherhood

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