At the dining table for breakfast
Jason: Heh.
Jason: Hahahaha.
Jason: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Bruce: *raising the newspaper up higher*
Alfred: *placidly pouring coffee into Bruce’s mug* Did something interesting happen, Master Jason?
Jason: Alfred, I am about to have the perfect surprise for that bony a-Tim. The perfect surprise for Tim.
Alfred: *putting away the bar of soap he pulled out of nowhere* Is that so? Please do be careful not to make a mess here. The waxing was just done in the dining room.
Jason: No problem, in fact-
Tim: *entering sluggishly*
Jason: In fact…in…fact…Megamind, what are you doing here?
Tim: ……..hm?
Jason: What are you doing here?
Tim: eating??
Jason: You-why are you coming from the right side bathroom-weren’t you going to use the upstairs one on the left?
Tim: oh. Dick was already in it so I decided to use the other one.
Jason: what.
Tim: what.
Jason: No. Hahahahaha. You’re joking…nononono-god, Tim, WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?
Tim: ????????
Jason: You-
Dick’s voice thundering from a floor away: JASON!!!!
Jason: *staring blankly then running forward and smacking Tim on the head* It’s all your fault!
Tim who hasn’t slept or had coffee or know why something he doesn’t know about is his fault: ???? WHAT DID I DO?!
Jason: *running past and leaping out the window* See you later, losers. Bye, Alf.
Disappearing seconds before a blur of wet skin, white towel, and neon pink hair rushes past and follows him out the window.
Tim:
Bruce:
Tim: ……Did you have breakfast yet?
Bruce: …….Hrmgh.
Alfred: *tutting* I just had the floors done. Master Bruce, would you mind redoing them? I’m afraid I must catch the mailman before he gives treats to Titus again. He’s leaving crumbs all over the entrance.
Bruce: What about Ti-
Bruce: *glancing back to see a lone leaf float in and drop slowly to the ground*
Bruce: ………
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Dick & Jason fic recs
Some of the best fics featuring bickering, bonding, and brotherhood between Dick Grayson and Jason Todd.
"Secrets, Siblings, and Cigarettes" by CrimeAlley1048 - A young Jason Todd finds an uninvited guest at Wayne Manor.
"drawing lines in the sand" by acrobats - When Batman is injured, Nightwing and Robin have to patrol together. The only problem is that they can't stand each other.
"Call Me Hopeless" by incogneat_oh - Dick is so very tired. Love is stored in the brotherhood.
The Art of Bird Metaphor by lowflyingfruit - Batman works alone. Everyone knows that. What Jason's learning is that he also has a penchant for picking up strays. And while Jason's just your common or garden Gotham street rat, Bruce's other stray, Richard, is an ex-assassin for the Court of Owls. An ex-assassin for the Court of Owls who hates Jason's guts. Adjusting to life in Wayne Manor was hard enough already.
"the long lost art of killing it dead" by dustorange - Red Hood is a criminal, so it doesn't make sense why he would bother dragging Nightwing back to Dick Grayson's apartment and bandaging his potentially deadly gunshot wounds. What makes even less sense is why Hood keeps coming back. (AKA another "Dick redeems Red Hood with the power of affection" fic but with even less mental stability.)
"catch and release" by hellsreluctantheir - Dick tries to catch Jason. [Whumptober with hurt Dick]
"Proper Procedures for Undercover Missions" by solomonara - Dick shows off his master detective skills, tracks down Jason, and runs a refresher course on the proper procedure for undercover missions.
"like falling water" by naheka - All Jason wanted to do was take a nap and pull one over on Bruce. Trust Dick to go ahead and ruin everything.
"see my other side" by deepestbluesky- Red Hood rebrands.
"fortune telling and speculative science" by knowsphere - Nightwing and Red Hood face uncertain doom.
"Bow to the Crown" by hauntedlittledoll - Dick is down for the count. Jason delivers a monologue to poor Damian.
"Upside Down" by withthekeyisking - Something that was not on Jason's agenda for the night, but somehow now is: take care of the de-aged version of his big brother, who is—in his tiny mind—apparently running away from juvie.
"Equivalent Exchange" by Lysical - Dick leaned over and pinched his cheek. Jason reached up and swiped at him, scowling. Dick calls in an old favor owed by Jason.
"Oh How the Turntables" by Lysical - Nearly drowning in Gotham Harbor means that it's Dick who is in the care of a concerned sibling. He's not prepared to go down without a fight, though.
"Always Someone Better" by lowflyingfruit - What Jason hadn't known when Batman scooped him off the streets was how much it sucked to be the second and second-best child. Five times Jason felt inferior to Dick, and a reversal he didn't savour like he thought he would.
"Home Intrusion" by daedalusdavinci - Dick feels overwhelmed by depression. Jason is a chaotic blend of unapologetically annoying and insufferably caring. ♡
"A little more heart and soul" by ruesyblues - Dick wants Damian to be happy. He just has no clue how to accomplish that.
Honorable mentions:
"scout's honour" by orphan_account - Jason meets his older brother for the first time. Alternatively: local children solve murders and hate their dad.
"One Bird, Two Bird, Red Bird, Dead Bird" by blacklettered - In which Jason Todd is dead, and Dick is fine.
"lonely town" by TheResurrectionist - Bruce doesn’t kill the Joker. But that was Dick’s little brother, damn it. Major character death, intense grief, death wishes, extreme peril, self-destructive behavior.
"haunt the blood" by wednesday - Hood walks into the warehouse and about a dozen feet in his steps falter. The helmet hides his face, but the way his muscles tense spell out danger in a way that makes Dick instantly wary. He’d rather not get handed over to any masked villains, Hood included.
"Convergence" by meaninglessblah - Dick volunteers to unmask the Red Hood rogue who's been meddling in Roman's business. The enigma Dick finds seems more intent on unmasking him. Villainous Red Hood.
"Pastrami on Rye" by sister_wolf - "You want a sandwich?" Jason Todd -- fucking Jason Todd -- asked off-handedly as he walked into the kitchenette of the small, dingy apartment. "Oh, right, you can't answer right now. Well, I want a sandwich, so you get one too." Hostility, bitterness, villainous Red Hood.
"Not A Brother Not A Friend" by kleine_aster - Nightwing helps the wanted villain Red Hood recover from fear toxin—though they are not brothers, and they are not friends.
"A Christmas Miracle" by Mithen - Damian and Dick go undercover to bust a child-kidnapping ring whose members dress up as Santa Claus.
"provisional kindred soul" - two guys sit on a roof and talk around their childhoods. Warning for crappy dad Bruce.
"New Life, New Leaf" by CrimeAlley1048 - Jason Todd gives the "no killing" rule a try.
"Like Father" by Wisetypewriter - Scarlet & Dick, Scarlet & Jason. Jason, Dick privately recalled, was ironically the one that took after Bruce's adoption addiction the most.
Two Dead Birds by InsaneTrollLogic - There's some lunatic in a red helmet running through Jason's territory. He wants to think it's a copy cat. He's wrong. "UtRH" time travel redux, Jason-centric.
"See No Evil" by cherrysour - Jason has never been great at feelings, and seeing strong, independent Nightwing blind and alone brings up too many of them. Jason never stopped idolizing Dick.
"occam's razor" by BeatriceEagle - An Internet community discusses the mysterious death of a billionaire's son.
"Joking" by CrimeAlley1048 - Dick has to put in entirely too much effort to wish his brother a happy birthday.
"It's Tomb Time" by FleetSparrow - Tiny vignette. When Dick and Jason have to investigate an old tomb, Jason doesn't like it one bit. And makes it known. Repeatedly.
"Save Me From Tears" by Shenanigans - Jason's gift isn't expensive; it's priceless.
"Through Me Tell the Story" by diefleder_tey - Jason takes Dick to his favorite bookstore and tasks him with finding a certain book; it doesn't end like he expects.
"for one more moment" by renecdote - Hurt/comfort, Dick is self-sacrificing, Jason is worried angry.
"Changes" by HoodEx - Dick copes with his depression in a certain way, much to the horror of his family. Jason helps him through it.
"Rumours Of My Death" by WordsAblaze - Dick and Jason end up sharing a messy but much-needed emotional moment in a graveyard. Set during the Spyral arc.
"Down to the Dregs" by firefright - The fallout of the Joker war and Dick getting his memory back is far messier than some in his family would like to acknowledge. But to the surprise of them both, Jason, out of all people, is willing to listen. Content warning: Ric arc, "City of Bane", "The Joker War", and other frustrating canon events referenced.
"the past doesn’t die" by Phidippus - Their lives have never been simple, but Dick and Jason come to find that some bonds last through death.
"Relax" by thebluemango - Dick is cold and bleeding. When he gets rescued, even in his disoriented brain he wants to stay strong for his littlest brothers. Little does he know, he can just relax.
"Fabric Softener" by ceruleon - As the title implies, this story is way soft. Feel-good fluff.
Red X by ilovelegendsalot - A rather painstakingly canon-compliant Teen Titans 2003 cartoon fic, in which Jason Todd steals the Red X suit from his older brother.
Bad Company by LilRedRobinHood - Deathstroke's son is dead and he demands an apprentice to pay off the blood debt--Robin, specifically. While the already-grieving Dark Knight's investigation devolves into a self-destructive spiral, Dick clings stubbornly to his ideals…and somewhere along the line he might end up accidentally befriending his dead brother. Work in progress, last updated in 2022.
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