#Passive consuption is the enemy of fandom in general but especially fic

[leonidas1754]

I've been struggling with writing as of late.

Finishing a story has always been a challenge, and frequently I start or work on one of my myriad WIPs, nothing new and not a problem. I do this for free, I don't need to finish a damn thing if I don't feel like it.

Learning to write for myself was a process, but I like to think I've mostly gotten there. I write first and foremost a fic I want to read myself, and if others like it, that's cool too, but it's not necessary. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean lack of response doesn't get to me sometimes. And that's what's happening now. Usually it's not a big problem, I get bummed but I keep on trucking.

But this time around... Not so much, and it's not hard to see why. I put my heart and soul into this story, I worked so damn hard on it, and it seemed like there were at least a handful of people enjoying and following it. But when I posted the last chapter... Nothing. A handful more kudos and two single comments, one of which I had to delete because it was literally just a demand that I write more, not even saying much about the fic itself.

Now don't get me wrong, no one HAS to comment or anything, even if you commented on previous chapters. And kudos are nice, I guess, others enjoy them more than me, and I've been able to enjoy them more since turning the hits off. But it kinda comes back around to like...

Passive consumption is the mortal enemy of fanfiction. It is so, so disheartening to put so much effort into your work, to put yourself out there, time and time again, only to get nothing in return. To get people just taking your work and give you nothing. Kudos are nice, but let's face it, they are the single most low-effort sign of appreciation ever. You hit a button. That's it. Even likes here on Tumblr are more significant, as there's a tab where you can view things you've liked. A kudos can feel much like you've tossed me a dime. A kind gesture for certain, but not worth much in the end. Plus, they're extremely easily missed if you don't have Emails turned on, like a great many don't because they become annoying spam a lot of the time. So chances are, if that fic is old, the author won't even see your kudos, turning it into an almost entirely meaningless gesture.

And it feels so selfish to complain like this, sure, but at the same time, what I'm so selfishly complaining about is essentially the perception of readers being selfish themselves. How many times have I seen people discussing the old eventuality of artists leaving communities because of art theft? It's referenced a fair bit, I'd say. (And artists definitely have similar problems in fandom, but this isn't about that) Does anyone even notice if a writer disappears? Unless they get lucky and manage to have a fic utterly explode in popularity, probably not, and even then it's more likely it'd only be noticed if the fic stops updating. Once it's done, people move on.

I haven't written in a month. I've poked at my WIPs, tried to write, but I can never get more than a sentence or two, or edit a WIP some, before I just give up because it's not there. I put so much effort and love into my writing and it's just... It's difficult to keep doing that when I feel like I'm the only one who even cares.

Maybe that is selfish and whiny and whatever else. But in this day and age where people are told more and more to value their work, to not sell themselves short, is it really that odd to be a bit upset that your work that you're not even asking money for doesn't get any appreciation?

Also, I swear, if I see one more "Ao3 should let us leave more than one Kudos," I'm gonna fucking scream. I constantly see posts about how people want a way to show more appreciation and it feels like they'll do fucking anything except leave a comment.

Listen, you do not have to comment. At all. If you have nothing to say, don't, leave that Kudos, they're still a good thing even if I have problems with them. If you have such extreme social anxiety that saying "I love this story" is too much, been there was like that, it took time to overcome. But for the love of god, if you have something to say, SAY IT.

Leave that "Second Kudos!" comment, tell the author what part of the story you liked best, how the story made you feel, if it's multichapter say what you're looking forward to most! Just give us something, some sort of sign that you aren't just taking a fic and throwing it away like a used napkin.

I've stopped replying to comments when all I have to say is "thanks for commenting" because it just feels like groveling, like I should be appreciative that they took the ten seconds to leave a simple comment. Simple comments are still good, they're still important, but I feel like writers shouldn't have to show their gratitude for them so someone thinks they should keep commenting. This is a more niche thing, but I've seen it here and there, both from writers apologizing for not immediately replying and from readers saying that lack of response discourages them from commenting at all.

Just show your appreciation for the free content you're given, for crying out loud. It is not that hard, I promise, and it will mean a fuckton more to the author than the actual effort it took to do it.