#Rex I’m not 100% sure about but I bet it will grow on me

[rainbowwing251]

Spoilers for the teaser trailer for Wave 4 of the Xenoblade Chronicles 3 DLC Under the Cut.

You know, despite the fact that Shulk looks like this

And Rex looks like this

In the Xenoblade 3 DLC story, I like to think that both of them are just as ticklish as they were in their respective games.

You poke Shulk’s stomach and scribble Rex’s underarms and they just. Perish. Just like they did when they were young.

[roguish-gallery]

Can you do a headcannon for the rouges on halloween?

Saved this one for the right time! Also!!! TW for some NS/FW mentions!

Rogues + Halloween HCs!!

Bane:

He might hop around from party to party, just for kicks! He doesn’t stick around any of them for too long, though.

You know those unsourced facebook articles that your aunt and your mom share each year about the guy who apparently lives in every neighborhood in the country who sticks razor blades into the chocolate bars he hands out to kids? That’s Bane, but he doesn’t even give out any candy. Just knives. He tells every child that knocks on his door how they can properly defend themselves should they ever get imprisoned for crimes they didn’t commit, or how to properly gut that one bitch who keeps hogging the good kickball at recess.

He dresses up like a Roman gladiator! It’s cool and gritty, and he doesn’t have to worry about finding a shirt that fits his body. Plus, he looks really good in gladiator sandals.

Catwoman:

She’s either attending some boring Halloween party with socialites she’s planning to rob, or watching some shitty scary movie with the rest of the sirens.

That being said, she makes sure that every child that knocks on her door gets the full-sized candy bars. 

She dresses up like a witch! Classy and simple, but lots of opportunities to add her own creative touches!

Harley Quinn:

She’s out there living her best life, being a grown-ass woman... and still trying to Trick-or-Treat. Anyone who gives her a toothbrush or a bag of pretzels is gonna get a brick thrown through their windows later that night.

She managed to convince Basil to lend her some of the horror films in his collection, and despite the fact that none of this shit is scary, she loses her goddamn mind during every mildly frightening scene.

She’s wearing one of that inflatable T-Rex costumes!!! Mostly because they’re really funny and because she KNOWS that people are expecting her to dress up as something “sexy” and this is her way of giving them a middle finger. (also if she’s in a big t-rex costume then it’s harder for the people handing out candy to realize that she’s a grown-ass woman).

Joker:

He’s the annoying bitch in the morph suit that shows up to every party. He thinks that people won’t be able to recognize him but. Everyone knows it’s him.

Killer Croc:

He has a genuine love for Halloween because it’s one of the few times of the year where he can walk around in public without anyone freaking out.

Fdskjfhskdj he shows up to costume contests and tells judges that he’s “Godzilla” and he leaves with some cool ribbons and a nice chunk of prize money for his “life-like costume”

Like I said, he’s either Godzilla or Kaiman from Dorohedoro. Whatever sounds more fun at the time!

Mad Hatter:

The only person here who made their costume entirely from scratch. It will be a cold day in hell when he gives a cent of his hard-earned money to a Spirit Halloween.

Surprisingly enough, he does not dress as an Alice character (he already does that every other day, and it wouldn’t be fun to do it for Halloween too). Now he’s dressed like a Victorian-style ghost!!

“Boo!! Give me your candy, and complement how dashing, smart, and spooky I am, or I’ll... uh- I’ll haunt you!! Boo!!!”

Penguin:

Surprising no one, he throws an excellent Halloween party at the Iceberg Lounge and he somehow prevents any of the other Rogues from setting any fires. A successful night!

He’s honestly not super festive when it comes to Halloween? At least in comparison to the other Rogues. He decorates the Iceberg accordingly for the party, but it’s more for the sake of entertaining his guests.

Tbh, he’ll just wear one of his regular suits, apply extra eyeliner, and slap on some fangs and tell everyone he’s a vampire. He’s glad that he finally has an excuse to wear one of his capes in public. Might fuck around and go as the Phatom of the Opera or some shit.

Poison Ivy:

Spends the entire month fuckin around with the pumpkins, as one with plant powers is ought to do. If the pumpkin you’re trying to carve into a jack o’ lantern suddenly grows arms and stabs you back with your knife, Pamela probably had something to do with it.

Harley ate all of the candy she bought a week ago, and she forgot to grab more so Pam awkwardly hands out leftover food from her fridge to any trick-or-treaters who come over. Pam hopes that the toddler in the Paw Patrol costume enjoys the hummus he got because Pam was really looking forward to eating it.

She dresses as Demeter! I love Pammy so much and I’m sorry to say this but she is 100% the type of person who gets huffy whenever people (or children) don’t immediately recognize who she’s dressed as.

Riddler:

Jon rents all of the Exorcist films and bets Eddie 100 dollars that he wouldn’t be able to watch through the entire series. Ed promptly accepts that bet… and quits 30 minutes into the first movie.

… He’s dresses as Captain Kirk for Halloween. Ed is a shameless Trekkie and I will die on this hill.

He individually texts every Rogue and officer of the GCPD this exact copypasta, and then he… turns his phone off for the rest of the week and refuses to respond to any calls :) or death threats :) or warrants for his arrest :)

Scarecrow:

Ahhhh…. Do you hear that? The shrieks of terror?  That crisp autumn air? Those Pillsbury sugar cookies with the pumpkins on them? Yes, Jonathan Crane is in his natural element.

Sdasdfsdfkj He sneaks into the local haunted house and corn maze attractions so he can upstage the actual scare actors.

He just wears his scarecrow outfit; if it’s not broken, don’t fix it. (that, and Jervis made him swear to not buy a cheap costume at Spirit Halloween.)

Two-Face:

He’s just chillin!! Having a fun spooky time!! He can buy apple cider back at the store again, and life is good!

Harv will make trick-or-treaters flip a coin, and based on what it lands on they either get a full chocolate bar, or a box of raisins and a toothbrush.

He’s dressed up like a biker! Leather jacket, cool shades, and tight jeans- he and Bruce used to dress up like bikers for past Halloweens!

[heyimtavia]

THE POST FINALE HENRY DANGER OPINIONS TAG:

Hey party people! Sorry I’ve been a bit out of the loop. Due to what’s going on in the world, adulting sorta got in the way and I have to DVR the final episode. No one tagged me, but I just wanted to add my two cents since this is officially the end and this is a really cute tag.

1. Who was your overall favorite member of Team Danger and why?

Charlotte hands down. She was brilliant, sassy and just a great friend to Henry no matter what. She’s one of the main reasons why I decided to tune into the show. I saw a lot of myself in her. I was once that little smart black girl that no one listened too. But it’s okay though, but that GLOW UP is real! I know from experience lol.

2. Who was your favorite non-team danger character and why?

Y'all know I love Fran the security guard. She should’ve gotten more air time. I just think she’s hilarious! I’d loved to see her try to wrestle a dolphin any day!

3. Who was your favorite villain and why?

Dr. Minyak & Nurse Cohort. I just gotta respect his hustle. Other than Rex and Rick Twitler, I feel like he’s the only everyday villain who always came close to defeating Captain Man & Kid Danger. He always had unique plans; from capturing and brain-altering Charlotte to taking Piper and the man fan hostage, he was always creative. Plus I love his little temper tantrums he sometimes throws. 

4. What were your top five favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) All time Fav would go to The Great Cactus Con. From the dopeyness of how everyone can do a backflip instead of Ray. How Charlotte gets to show off her fashion design skills. How Piper unofficially works with Team Danger. Plus I love the cute romantic bit between Jasper and Patina. 2) Rumblr- That whole episode was just comedy gold for me. They should’ve brought Kyle back for the finale and had him show up at kid danger’s funeral  3) I dream of Danger - Its Char’s episode. I like how it alluded to Charlotte’s dream might come true but it doesn’t. However, I don’t like how they just moved on like the episode never happened even when Jasper thinks that char likes him. 4) Flabber Gassed- I love that char got to show off her fighting skills and how happy Jasper was to be a superhero. 5) Holey Moley- I straight up die for laughter every time I see that episode. I love how Henry kept saying, “oh look, a downside.” I feel like that episode would have been a sketch on All That or the Amanda Show. It just felt like good ole Nickelodeon comedy.

5. What were your top five least favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) Henry’s Birthday- Call me a diva, but if anyone treated me like that on my birthday, the party is OVER! 2) Captain Makini (I think that's what it’s called). Sorry, I'm not really a fan of Frankie Grande and though he was great for the musical, I really don’t think he needed a second episode. 3) Meet Cute Crush- I’m sorry, anything involving Piper is just physical and emotionally draining. All that girl does is yell. Thank u, next. 4) Sick & Wired- Because I got sick and tired of Ray’s shenanigans. 5) JAM Session- Now Piper isn’t my favorite character, but how that girl was manipulated all over a bet was just stupid and disrespectful.

6. What was your favorite running gag and why?

1) Fran’s line, “There’s only one in the whole world, and we got it!” Swellview must be a fun, mysterious place that always gets amazing things lol. 2) When everyone says “Click” before hanging up their phone. I find it funny because I’m pretty sure the kids had never owned a flip phone in their lives.

7. What was your favorite one-off throw away gag and why?

When shwoz referenced his song from the musical when he said, “Science, science, science, I’ve said this already.” I think he said this in Theranos boot. And also the grammar fights and how grammar rules don’t apply to Charlotte lol.

8. What episode, which character and which duo made you laugh the most?

I think Holey Moley & Rumblr both made me laugh the most. Those were great episodes. Jasper would have to be the funniest. That boy says the darndest things lol. Hensper. Because of how Henry loved Jasper’s mustache and wanted to get one too. And when Jasper and Henry were both “Dude. Bro. Dude. Bro. DUDE!” Over the Patina situation and Charlotte had to break them up.

9. What episode, which character and which duo made you the most emotional?

I think it was Second episode of the finale episodes, when Henry was freaking out at the end because he was alone and Rex had sent Ray A Million and one years into the past. The fact that he literally had to think like all of his friends because obviously that’s what he was used to, everyone being there to help figure out a plan and keep swellview safe. And the fact that for that moment he was kid danger and all alone was really scary for him.

10. How would you rank each season from 1 to 5, one being the best and five being the worst?

I would rank season 5 as 1. It overall had great episodes and delved into different genres and fun tv and movie tropes. It made it a joy to watch, though some episodes leading towards the end didn’t quite catch me. Season 4 would be like a high 4 but not exactly a 5. Season 3 was sorta Meh to me. So maybe a #.  Season 2 would be a 4 and season 1 would be like a 4 because it was a the beginning to a great show and was still working out the kinks a bit.

11. Who was your favorite duo in the show (romantic or non-romantic)?

Chenry 100%. The friendship that those two have is great! Now I must say, I hate that Nick was still posting about them on their youtube page for clout knowing that it wasn’t gonna happen. I felt like they did that just so people would watch the final episodes. I was gonna watch regardless, but really Nick? Really?

12. What was your favorite Henry and Ray moment/episode?

The bro song! Plus I love that it kept getting referenced after the musical as well.

13. What was your favorite Chenry moment/episode?

 When Char was controlling  Henry in flabber gassed, she made him jump up and down while clapping! I love that even shwoz joined in too lol. And when Henry was concerned about her after she ate bad meat from the auto snacker.

14. What was your favorite Hensper moment/episode?

The mustache scene from Grand Theft Otto, “dude if I had one, I’d be Man Danger!”

15. What was your favorite Chensper moment/episode?

This also kinda includes Ray but when they were all stealing Joss Ross’s gift from her birthday party and they were just casually leaving. And how Jasper kept saying, “It’s not stealing if it’s from a criminal.” Plus I like the episode when Hen and Char have to pretend to date just to see if Jasper would keep their secret. The boy poured a whole bowl of pees down his shirt lmaoooo!!

16. If you could go back and change one element of the show, what would it be?

 Have Ray grow up and stop fawning over Henry’s mom. It was just plain creepy! Oh and put some respect on my girl Charlotte’s name.

17. If you could say one thing to each main character in the pilot, what would it be?

Life isn’t always about one day getting a statue, (I’m looking at YOU Captain Man). Crime-fighting is fun and being a sidekick could literally every kid’s dream. But don’t forget to be a kid. Hangout with your friends, go to school, go on dates. Do the whole growing up thing. But at the end of the day, you have to do what’s best for you.

18. If you could say one thing to each main character in the finale, what would it be?

Thank you for sharing your lives with me and I am so so sooo proud of you all! 

19. Were you satisfied with the finale? What part was your favorite and what part was your least favorite?

 Honestly, I think it was okay for what it was. My fav part was when Jasper literally had to carry Char out of the mancave because she refused to leave Henry behind. I love that they decided to stick together. They did leave a lot of storylines open. I thought Joss Moss would be revealed as the real Mob boss. I thought Rick Twitler would regain his memory. Where the heck is Gooch? Caitlin? Chenry (for obvious reasons). I'm just spitballing here. Was it good? Yes. could it have been better? Hell yes.

20. What would your ideal Henry danger spin off look like?

 Charlotte and Henry have powers and Jasper can fight! Dystopia. That was the spin-off that I wanted! I don’t really care about the new kids as much. They’re college-aged too? Just imagine the shenanigans they would get into! But we need to kick the Charlotte hating writer off the staff though. Can The CW pick this show up?

21. Where do you personally see the characters 10 years from now? What are they doing, who are they with, where are they in their lives - what do you think happened to them? Most importantly, are they happy?

 I honestly haven’t thought about it. But I believe no matter what they do or where they may end up, they will be happy. They’ll probably always be a team.

22. What was your favorite part of the show and why did it initially draw you in?

It became an escape from my normal adult life. (I’m saying like I’m old. I’m only 23.) I randomly flipped it on one day, I can't remember what episode it was, but from then on, I was hooked. I used to watch it a while back, but I fell off, but at that moment on time, it was easy for me to fall right back into it.

23. What was your favourite part of the fandom and why did it initially draw you in?

The friends I’ve made, the people have met! They are the best out of all the fandoms I’m a part of. I’ve been on tumblr for years and never had I have a group of people be so nice, supportive and just incorporate me into things. I love you guys so much!

24. Describe your overall emotions/feelings regarding the show being over and the show in general, looking back on it as a whole, with one quote from the show.

It’s a bittersweet feeling. I hate to see it go. But all good things must come to an end. But I guess there’s nothing better to say than, “Feels Good.”

25. If you were able to add one scene in the finale, what would you add?

 I don’t know honestly. Maybe we could have seen him reunite with his friends and family. Especially Charlotte and Jasper, Afterall, they probably thought that their best friend was dead for all they knew.

26. Favorite outfit/hair style?

 Charlotte’s Date outfit with Jack Swagger. Sis was rockin that romper. Also when Jasper and Charlotte were helper bunnies! Those outfits were hilarious and cute.

27.Least favorite character?

I'm sorry but Piper. She was worse than the whole annoying little sister trope. I swear all ash did was yell through most of the seasons and then they gave this chick a driver’s license, I mean what?? Plus i think her reaction to finding out Henry was kid danger was better in Broken Armed and Dangerous, than in twisted sister. 

28. What is question you would like to ask the writers/ producers?

Im tagging @adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel

[majingojira]

Jurassic Park - Expanded With Modern Knowledge

I’ve posted a few times now on how to redo Jurassic Park/Jurassic World in terms of Fauna Diversity and other factors.  So you can say with this post I’m “Back on my Bullshit.” 

Let’s dive right in, shall we?  We’ll see some repeats, but others not so much. We’ll go about it via different exhibits: The Primary Tour, The Aviary, the Aquarium, The “Fossil Zoo”, The Feeder Animals, and the WIlds. 

 The Wilds

There are indeed wild animals in Jurassic Park.  In the book, part of the whole thing as the re-creation of an extinct ecosystem.  The island Isla Nublar is based on, Cocos Island, is extremely isolated and secluded.  Outside of feral animals ( pigs, deer, goats, cats, and rats), there is very little land life.  Arthropods (Primarily ants, butterflies, millipedes, centipedes, spiders, and isopods) and 2 species of lizards - an Anole and a Gecko.  That’s about it.  Other sources say there are other reptiles on the island, but I have yet to find any details beyond that. 

Though there are a LOT of birds.  90 species, mostly seabirds using it or the offshore rocks as breeding sites.  Endemic birds include a Cuckoo (The Cocos Cuckoo, which is a glorious name a had to share), a finch, and a flycatcher.  Most other birds are found elsewhere inland or offshore. 

The books add 4 animals to the wilds: frogs, leeches, large tarantulas, and opossum. It acknowledges feral rats, but little else.  I’d include them, easily.  Several varieties of Opossum, because they are an archetypical “Ancient” mammal.  The Common and Virginia Opossum, the Water Opossum, and 2 types of Mouse Opossum are all native to Costa Rica and could easily island-hop to Nublar beforehand, or be introduced for a “Night Safari” element. 

Me?  There are 3 birds I’d bring focus to. The Bronzed Cowbird, the Cattle Tyrant, and Yellow-Headed Caracara. All of them follow large animals (or at least, things Capybara sized or bigger) and eat insects disturbed by the larger animals, or that try to feed on the larger animals.  All are native to Costa Rica and its surroundings, so with the influx of large herbivores, they are bound to come over.  Further, smaller herons and egrets would also take advantage of the larger animal movement disturbing prey.  

South America also has its own dung beetles, and I bet a few of them could be called over to all the free food.  Most deal with monkey poo, but I doubt they’d ignore the bounties available.  InGen may bring in their own to handle the elephant-sized spore, but there will be dung beetles. Lots of them. 

Other Costa Rican fauna I’d include as background elements (that could feasibly be on Isla Nublar AND fit the prehistoric aesthetic) include shrews, Central American Agouti, Northern Tamandua,  Nine-Banded Armadillo, Brown-Throated Three-Toed Sloth, Hoffmann’s Two-Toed Sloth, and Central American Dwarf Squirrel.  

But we also know that InGen released animals into the park that were ‘prehistoric’ to make the whole area support the dinosaurs in some way.  This included a (grossly misplaced and oversized) dragonfly/griffinfly. 

So, in a more realistic version, what would they do release into the wilds of Isla Nublar? 

Tinamous.  As I’ve said before, they can easily be in enclosures with larger animals.  They’ve been in their current form for about 10 million years, and they resemble ancestral ground birds (the kind that survived the KT Boundary) extremely well. 

Capybara.  Docile as hell and gets along with everything, as well as attracting the tick-eating birds mentioned above, these animals can chill with the best of them.  Plus the genus dates back 3.6 million years, with the subfamily going back about twice that far.  They are a bit longer than the largest known Mesozoic mammal (Repenomammus (90cm, 13kg)), growing to 1.3m and 68kg.  

The Feeder/Support Animals

In the novel, there are made mention of fish being stocked that the Tyrannosaurs feed on. The Arapaima is about the only fish for that environment (and easily obtainable) that could fit the bill. They also use goats as feeder animals, and in the movie, they use cattle to feed the raptors. 

In my take, the carnivorous animals would primarily be fed with fish and poultry.  Some smaller ones may warrant mice or rats, but fish would work much better overall.  So, Chicken, Turkey, Arapaima, Fathead Minnows, Tilapia, Poecilia, and so on. Given what we currently know about Tyrannosaurs, 6 Turkey a day would be enough to keep it fed (T. rex may need about  40k calories a day to function, and one turkey can provide about 7k calories).  Or 5 Arapaima (fish provide 82 calories per 100 grams, and arapaima can get up to 200kg, even assuming 100kg, that’s 8,200 calories per fish).  

Goats have about 1 calorie per gram, so a goat weighing 40kg (not out of the ordinary as breeds range from 20 to 140kg, but it would be an overall large goat) would meet the dietary needs of a Tyrannosaur.  I’ve already mentioned the cowbirds, but they are pretty important for overall animal health.  Because I’m sure there are ticks since the deer got on the island. 

The Fossil Zoo

Here are “Living Fossils” and things reverse-engineered from existing animals to be more akin to their prehistoric brethren.  As well as their mammalian De-Extinctions.  Because some would be rather easy. 

Some of the ‘wid’ animals would have an example or two in this more “proper’ zoo environment: Capybara, Agouti, Nine-Banded Armadillo, Tamandua, Sloth, Opossums.  

Other mammals of note in this section would be Treeshrews, an Aardvark, Greater Mouse Deer, Black and Rufous Elephant Shrews, A Tapir, Chacoan Peccary, Solenodon, A Giant Anteater, Platypus, Short-Beaked Echidna, and Long Beaked Echidna.  

The Platypus and Long Beaked Echidna may be modified to be larger (2ft long, and 4ft long) to match fossil ancestors.  

It would also be home to 3 de-extinct Mammals.  Quagga, Thylacine, and Gigantopithecus.  The first is easy, the second could get additional funding, the third... Because it’s Cool. 

But with any de-extinction, there come problems.  This is Jurassic Park after all.

Quagga is easy to tame but can be high strung at times.  It does not react well to the smell of predatory dinosaurs. 

Thylacines ... have a very nasty hunting technique of BITING OFF FACES. They aren’t bloodthirsty or anything, even taking turns to feed in an orderly fashion, but their hunting technique is rather mean. 

Gigantopithecus are 3m tall, 500kgs, and STILL able to climb rather well.  it looks like an Orangutang trying to play Gorilla, but with only minimum sexual dimorphism in terms of size (males are still bigger) and it’s working out very well.  Like orangutans, they are natural cage breakers.  They also have very strong jaws and large canines.  They will bite when angered, and if it wants to, it is strong enough to wreck several people in a charge.    

Capybara, Mouse Deer, Tapir, Peccary, Giant Anteater, and the de-extinct trio would have outdoor enclosures, naturally. 

Most of the reptiles would be in the aquatic section, but there are 4 that would be here. 

Tuatara (Modified for tropical environments), the Aldabra Giant Tortoise (possibly grown to “Testudo atlas”/Megalochelys atlas sizes -- almost 7ft across and weighting 4000kg), Quinkana, and Megalania. 

Why? Because Quinkana is a cool crocodilian land predator, and Komodo Dragons are basically island dwarf versions of Megalania.  Quinkana is 6m long (so it’s Q. fortirostrum rather than any of the other species), and Megalania 7m long.  

Once again, we have the unexpected from the de-extinct animals.  

Megalania has two things that were discovered recently in its descendants.  First, it is venomous.  The venom lowers blood pressure in the victim.  So, combined with its horrible bite, the victim will more readily bleed out. The other factor is they retain the Komodo Dragon’s ability to have virgin births.  So, despite being female, they can generate MALE offspring asexually.  

I think, narratively, it would be more fun for this to be the source of the breeding dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.  

Despite being a crocodile, Quinkana is very active and mobile.  It’s also a decent digger.  So it makes a mess of the initial enclosure.  

There are a few birds in the fossil house, both the subject of De-extinction efforts. The Dodo and Upland Moa.  Both have some accessible DNA, and modifying birds' eggs is not too far fetched given what they've already done. 

The last section of the Fossil House can be called the “Carboniferous Swamp” as it’s a re-creation (as best they can do) of that environment.  Here are many amphibians, some with a proper prehistoric pedigree: Greater Siren, Midwife Toad, New Zealand Primitive Frog, Aquatic Caecilians, and Giant Chinese Salamanders.  The latter of which naturally can be up to 6ft long.  JP scientists ensure that they get big with modifications, and have gotten a few 2m monsters loafing around the “Fossil Zoo.”  Basically, as many “Living Fossils” as they can cram together. 

But the real prize here is the insects.  There are a few ‘standard’ ancient insects, and some velvet worms on display.  But the prize is the 4 ‘recreated’ insects.  InGen’s versions of Pulmonoscorpius, Meganeura, Arthropleura, and Manoblatta.  A 70cm scorpion, a Griffon-fly with a 65cm wingspread that was also 70cm long, a millipede 1m long, a 40cm cockroach, and a 1m Centipede.  

Yes, a 1m Centipede.  Narratively, we WANT things to go south, and well, there’s an episode of Lost Tapes which really has fun with giant Centipedes. 

And once again, the Chaos Effect rears its head. Of course, they are breeding despite their best efforts.  But it’s more than that. 

The Pulmonoscorpius they have is derived from an emperor scorpion.  This means it can burrow better than they expected, and while the venom of the base animal is not dangerous, the dosage in their Pulmonoscorpius makes it so.  Paralyzing adults.  In the weak or young, it can lead to coma and death.  Also, it’s more aggressive than the base species.  

The Griffonfly is the most active among them and can use its wingbeats to breathe more effectively.  It spends most of its time growing as a nymph, and a short portion of its life as a flying adult. To hold it, you need a falconer’s glove. 

The Millipede Arthropleura is armored as heck.  Far more than they expected.  And it gnaws like a rodent. 

The Centipede Arthropleura is a monster. It’s fearless and willing to attack people, with venom enough to greatly harm a person (killing the small and weak).  Multiple bites can be fatal.  They also act as carrion eaters.  

And the roach?  It’s an omnivorous scavenger.  If hungry enough, they will gnaw on people who are sleeping near them.   

The Aquarium (and Other Water-Ways)

There’s a lot of aquatic “Prehistoric” animals to draw on without genetic engineering.  Considered “Fluff” by the park, they nevertheless flesh things out. 

There are native fish in the waterways, mostly killifish.  Ingen brings in (and modifies) Bichir, Paddlefish, Sturgeon, Lungfish (South American and Queensland), Gar (Tropical and Alligator Gar), Coelocanth, Bowfin, Arapaima, and Silver Arowana.  Several of these are prized gamefish, so of course, Jurassic Park has a pond to fish for them. 

The aquarium also includes Amphibians: Greater Siren, Midwife Toads, New Zealong Primitive Frogs, Purple Frog, Hula Painted Frog, and another Giant Salamander. 

Aquatic reptiles are where things get more interesting.  There’s are tanks for sea turtles (Olive Ridley’s Sea Turtle), Pig Nosed Turtles, an Alligator Snapping Turtle, and (of course) American Alligators.  

Now we get to the cloned animals.  First, the aquatic crocodile Metriorhynchus. Also, Titanoboa (They call it Gigantophis, but it’s Titanboa).  Nothosaurus, Ichthyosaurus, Plesiosaurus, and Mosasaurus round out the menagerie.  

So, how do they go wrong? 

Well, half of these animals give live birth, so the standard cloning technique didn’t work until they made an artificial womb. Titanoboa is misidentified and almost fully aquatic.  

Metriorhynchus will ‘nibble’ larger prey.  Bite off chunks of something swimming by, darting in and out.  They may or may not kill people this way, but it will maim and ‘disarm’ them.  

Nothosaurus have very dextrous hands, making the seal-reptiles natural cage breakers. They are also great climbers, so they speculate that the animals lived in rocky environments. 

Ichthyosaurs look like dolphins, but they are not.  More skittish than dangerous. 

They thought Plesiosaurus was able to haul itself onto land, but it is not.  

Mosasaurus... It is a mosasaur.  A second roar of jaws to manipulate prey it captures is pretty badass enough. And it can swallow a person whole with little effort. 

Among the dinosaurs, we have the Great Auk, the Original Penguin.  Another recently extinct bird.  Another bird in the Aquarium is the Common Loon, but by comparison, it is a minor addition.

The Great Auk is an exceedingly brave bird.  It will not run readily, preferring to peck and bite when confronted.  Why it’s so brave is not evident, but it is, and won’t take ‘no’ lying down. 

The jewel of the dinosaurs in the aquarium is the Halszkaraptor-- the diving duck raptor. Because, really, how could I not?  This one is weird enough on its own. 

The Aviary

When I first put this together, I made an effort to keep the Pterosaurs small. I’m going to make some exceptions to that for Jurassic Park fun. 

Modern Birds brought into parts of the aviary (because it has parts) are Tinamous, Seriema, California Condor, Magpie Goose, Mousebirds, Bearded Reedling, Broad-Billed Spaayoa, and Hoatzin.

Cloned birds include the Carolina Parakeet and Passenger Pigeon.  These two have large open enclosures because they require a LOT of animals in their group to be comfortable. So already, there are over a hundred of each of these animals. 

Avian Dinosaurs in the park include Archaeopteryx, Microraptor (which they call Tetraptertyx),, and Ambopteryx.  

Archeopteryx is a glider capable of downward flaps, but no upstrokes.  A generalist with the coloration and overall habits of a solitary crow. 

Microraptor is a better flying and climber than Archeopteryx with its four wings and wider grip, it doesn’t seem to mind people and will use them as perches -- which can be dangerous when their claws go in the wrong place. 

Ambopteryx is the largest winged Scansauropteryx.  An omnivore, this bat-winged beasty is just over a foot long and vomits caustic, foul-smelling stomach contents onto attackers when it is angry.  So, really, it’s a “Dragon.”  

Ceredactylus was the main Pterosaur in the Aviary in the book, and I’ll keep them around too. Complete with territorial nature. 

Other Pterosaurs in the Aviary include Pteranodon, Quetzalcoatlus, Sordes, Anurognathus, and Dimorphodon.  

Unlike the films, this remembers that Pterosaurs use their heads for grasping prey and have no eagle talons. 

Pteranodon is more gregarious, an albatross scaled up.

Quetzalcoatlus is just... well, your basic Giant Azdarhkid pterosaur. It will totally spear a person and eat them. But it spends a lot of the time on the ground, so it keeps the enclosure size small ... for a Giraffe sized animal.  And yes, it will eat people if it can.  

Sordes is an eater of insects and amphibians.  When disturbed, they will swarm around an attacker, pecking and biting to drive them off. This can lead to some unfortunate accidents. 

Anurognathus is basically a pterosaur owl and insect eater.  They have the same unnerving effect as owls.  Their defensive cries and glowing red eyes are terror inducing among humans, easily generating panic. 

Dimorphodon gallops along the ground most of the time, flying only for short distances.  Insects and small animals make up the bulk of their diet.  If it’s small and fast-moving, they will try and take a bite.  That includes fingers.  Or whole hands.  

The Park

Now we come to the dinosaurs.  There are 3 main groups of them in the park: Minifauna, Fauna, and Megafauna. The Difference comes down to weight.  Megafauna is reserved for animals over a ton.  Fauna is for animals above 20kg (or 50lbs). Minifauna is for animals below 20kg on average. 

The park comes with 21 examples of Megafauna, 10 examples of Fauna, and 10 examples of Minifauna.

In the Megafauna, many of them are prone to being ... chaotic. 

Apatosaurs are the second biggest animal in the park by weight (15 tonnes).  Their necks are lined with spines they use for defense and in contests with each other.  They also have a line of raised spines along their backs, which become quite wicked at the tip of their tail.  Lashes with their tail, done to other herd members in dominance points, or against what annoys them, can be very dangerous.  But not as dangerous as when they rear up and try to smash things with their feet or neck. It’s also a low feeder/grazer, vacuuming up food as it moves its head side to side.  

Camarasaurus (C. lentus) are the heaviest animals in the park (20 tonnes), and are mid-range browsers.  They are docile, but their large nasal cavity proves very enticing to Avian Flu, which it acts as a carrier for, but doesn’t really suffer from. 

Spinosaurus is a big land pelican/Waddling Penguin/Crocodile thing. Big claws and jaws are nasty enough on their own with its semi-aquatic nature making it versatile, it still is goofier than it has any right to be.  Which masks its danger. 

Saltosaurus is a sauropod hippo with armored scutes along its back.  That’s pretty darn weird enough.  It’s as heavy as an elephant, and a browser as well, but not to the height of some other animals...

Tyrannosaurus hunts in packs like wolves, so they had to make a group of them as “Sisters” to prevent self-destructive behavior.  So there are 4 “Sisters” that the park knows of.   With all we know about T. rex, there’s not much more to ‘enhance’ it other than letting it be as smart as a modern alligator, or house cat.  Yes, they are comparable.  Eagle-Eyed, nose better than a bloodhound, and with powerful jaws, it is an apex predator for a reason. 

Triceratops has small quills along its torso and back like a porcupine to defend itself in addition to armor plaiting.   They prefer to travel in small groups and fights for dominance can occur if the group gets larger than 5 or 10 individuals.

Deinocheirus is r one of those dinosaurs “This is too weird for the 80s to handle” we now know of.  When riled, its arms are very dangerous weapons. And it will bite, even if only to toss away smaller attackers. Eating fish and plants, this animal has an impressive bluff display, and confidence to back it up. 

Theirizinosaurus is very weird, and worse, has the personality of a goose or swan.  Very confident, will rush down what it thinks are threats, and those claws make it very dangerous. 

Omeisaurus uses its clubbed tail to establish a pecking order (or “smashing order”) in the herd. 

Euhelopus is one of the few true browsing sauropods, really resembling a Giraffe in posture or a small Brachiosaurus/Giraffatita.   Like a Giraffe, it can kick with a LOT of force.  Enough to decapitate a man from brute force alone.  It’s the smallest of the long-neck Brachiosaurus, which is why it was targeted for cloning.  

Ankylosaurus is a goat.  It eats damn near anything.  Primarily eating leaves, it also adores fruit, and will go after large insects when it can.  Or swarms of them it just licks up after breaking open a nest.  They are proficient diggers as well, they like to sleep in burrows they build. It’s also very well camouflaged, so you can trip over it and it will likely take a swipe at you for your mistake. 

Edmontosaurus may be considered a ‘simple’ dinosaur from the bones, but that doesn’t tell the whole story, not by a longshot. See that picture? That’s an Edmontosaur! 

Stegosaurus is an extremely stupid ninja.  It moves quietly for its size, can wiggle and turn its plates red when angry as a distraction, and fold its whole body into a U shape to better strike enemies with its thagomizer.  And it is not afraid of groin shots. 

Styracosaurus is all about intimidation.  When confronted, it will mock charge, holler, stamp, and make a fuss. But if you stand up to it, it will back off, or even run away. 

Amargasaurus uses its neck spines defensively while grazing.  When threatened, they roll their heads under their chests, sticking out their spikes, and charge.  They do this with minimal provocation. They also lash their tails around wickedly.  

Parasaurolophus is LOUD.  Constant maintenance is needed on the paddock as they can rattle apart their paddock locks if they are not checked regularly.  It also gets the attention of certain predators regularly.  Insulation has so far proved ineffective.

Gigantoraptor is pretty damn weird all on its own. An omnivorous oviraptorosaur over 12ft tall at the hip, feathered and fearsome.  It uses its feathery arms (as well as a displaying throat pouch to communicate with members of its species. 

Allosaurus, the lion of the Jurassic.  They behave similarly to crocodiles, but more actively.  Which means they hunt semi-cooperatively.  Because of their primarily slashing jaw setup and strong necks, they prefer to bleed large items to death rather than quickly kill them.  They can still swallow a man whole (as long as they aren’t too big).  

Plateosaurus is a large, primitive planteater.  It walks on its hind legs, despite its size and descendants.  When threatened, it rears up and tries to claw attackers who get to close like an irate Ant Eater.  And those claws are very mean. They rake trees with their claws as a demonstration of power in the herd. 

Borealpelta digs ruts for themselves to sleep in at night.  This means only their armor bits show up.  They usually use the same one when they can, but it still damages enclosures.

Carnotaurus is a Cheetahs.  Extremely long-legged runners at high speed, and at long distance.  They can also swallow a man whole by stretching their jaws out. Also, its tiny arms are used for flappy dance displays. 

Now we come to the Fauna, which are small enough to get inside buildings and still be a visible threat to humans on occasion. 

Ceratosaurus is basically a bipedal crocodile, scutes and all.  The nasal horn is flat and largely for display.  They prefer swampy environments and eating aquatic animals. The thick hides of these animals make darting almost impossible, and mildly resistant to small arms fire. 

Pachycephalosaurus have dynamic skulls, the younger ones being spikier than the adults.  And they will butt EVERYTHING that annoys them even slightly.  Worse still, they are omnivores. They decrease the amount of meat in their diet as they age, but they won’t turn it down. 

Dilophosaurus has the frill and venom of the novel/movies, but the frill is made of feathers rather than skin and is lost in adults, which can be up to 3m/10ft tall.  

“Velociraptor”, or really, Dakotaraptor, is as smart as a crow, which means minor tool use.  Juveniles can fly short distances to escape an attack.  They are less like wolves and more like lions in how they hunt, climbing in trees to assist in their ambushes.  Think of them as ground-eagle-panthers with crow intelligence. 

Protoceratops make burrows to live in.  They sleep for short periods throughout the day and night, at seemingly random intervals.  

Struthiomimus’ fully developed wings are colorful, large, and help it maneuver at speeds up to 50mph (80kph).  They also help it intimidate others -- their claws also packing a bit of a punch. Primarily herbivorous, they are also very vocal animals.  Almost obnoxiously so.  

Dryosaurus is the dinosaur equivalent of a deer or large gazelle, living in small groups in forested areas.  Because of this, and an extremely skittish nature, they are hard to spot in their enclosures.  Sure, they are ON the tour, but the runaway when the cars come by.  It makes care for them difficult as well. 

“Troodon” is really Stenonychosaurus. Omnivorous, the focus on rodents and other small animals. They also feed on more fruit, seeds, nuts, and other high energy plants more regularly than InGen thought.  They are the best cage breakers in the park, being the smartest animals there (yes, smarter than the raptors).  They are also guide-animals.  They will guide larger predators, like tyrannosaurs to food sources they can’t access, but that the other animal can.  Similar to Crows and Wolves.  

“Oviraptor”, really Anzu,  is a large oviraptorid.  Herbivorous with occasional meanderings into carnivory, it’s main gimmick is its voice.  It’s a Lyrebird. It can vocally mimic anything its herd before and incorporate it into display songs. It can also use this to manipulate other dinosaurs, be it attract small animals to eat, bring ‘help’ for itself, or scare away potential threats.  So, imagine a scene.  A group of humans is hunting for other survivors, they hear someone crying “Help! Help!” and occasionally screaming.  They rush to aid and find this tall animal here.  Their guard lowered in confusion as another predator sneaks up behind them and takes them down. 

“Parkosaurus” is actually Oryctodromeus.  A burrower like Protoceratops, they are more communal in their nesting.  It’s rather unsettling to see animals as big as a medium-sized dog pop-up out of the ground like prairie dogs. 

Microfaunae are Coyote or smaller animals that can still be dangerous, but not so often or as directly.  

Coelophysis is the “Emu” of the park. They are inquisitive, but also not very bright.  They are also opportunistic.  Which can be hilarious, but also dangerous, because you are made of meat.  And they see no qualms with biting someone and running away again and again.  In groups. 

Psittacosaurus rattles its tail feathers as a means of simple communication.  They also bite with a lot of force when agitated, enough to take off a hand. 

Dromaeosaurus is a small raptor (or rather, typical, medium-sized one), but one more heavily built to take down prey larger than itself.  This one will hook onto a person and bite away, ripping out chunks.  Given they are about the size of a turkey, several of them can do that to a person.  

Vespersaurus is an opportunistic omnivorous desert dweller that runs along sand primarily, using its single grounded toe to get better traction and movement. Its kick has TWO large raptor-like claws on it, making it extra nasty. 

Limusaurus is another Noasaurid, a strange group of dinosaurs related to Ceratosaurus.  This one changes its diet as it ages.  As hatchlings and juveniles are omnivorous, eating plants, insects, and small animals.  As they become adults, they switch to an entirely herbivorous lifestyle.  This confused the hell out of InGen first time through. 

Nanosaurus (a.k.a. Othnelia/Othneliasaurus) is a tiny ornithopod that fills in the same role as a Thompson’s Gazelle.  Small, grazing, and skittish.  They like being in large herds for protection.  

Panphagia is an omnivorous ancient sauropod relative and the oldest species of dinosaur in Jurassic Park.  A consummate opportunist, its hands make it a pretty decent cage breaker.   And it really will eat anything, almost as much as the Ankylosaurs or goats, but more carnivorous.  

Procompsognathus is a chicken-sized carnivore that eats small animals as well as scavenges for food. It is also venomous, operating in groups to take down injured animals larger than itself.  

Compsognathus, by contrast, is a housecat in terms of personality.  An expert killer of small things, but can easily cozy up to humans.  Considered “Petting Zoo” material, if not for their teeth and claws.  

Shuvuuia is one of those animals that scientists even today don’t really know how it works and is also one of the smallest nonavian dinosaurs.  It uses its claws to break open rotting wood and picks off insects very quickly. Because it eats a lot of poisonous insects and acid-filled ants.  And it converts that into pure stink. Yeah, it’s an anteater-skunk dinosaur.   Final Thoughts I could probably have shaved things down to 10-15 of the movies/books, but I wanted to fill things out not just for variety, but for a proper park.   I’ll probably revisit this for a later post...