#S'ria -- saying 'I know' and nothing else is maybe not a social W even if you said it nicely

[snow-system-wol]

After returning from Matoya's Relic to rest at the Rising Stones for a short while, S'ria is intent on making sure G'raha understands his efforts have been appreciated. Perhaps G'raha's sleep-deprived filter is a bit lacking, though -- as he responds with approximately three words more than he meant to.

Ao3

S'ria was many things. He was, however, not an idiot. Even if there weren't some clear implications to Y'shtola's teasing, it was not subtle that G'raha's feelings for him went perhaps a bit beyond just admiration. (As if the Exarch had not all but admitted it himself, on multiple occasions.)

It had scared him at first. He'd maybe prefer that all feelings towards him be platonic at best, no matter who the person was. But G'raha was …kind. Kind and gentle and easy to trust (once they got through a few specific arguments back on the First.) That was almost worse. He felt like safe enough of a person that S'ria found himself…considering what it would be like. To be in a relationship like that of his own choosing.

That was most assuredly a terrible idea, though, wasn't it? Certainly not a way he'd like to mess up one of his closest friendships. It didn't seem like G'raha intended on acknowledging it himself anytime soon, so for now the matter could simply wait.

And wait it did, as they continued to make the best of their relative peace, as Alisaie and G'raha renewed their efforts to find a cure for tempering, as they actually made progress.

It was beautiful to behold, watching G'raha shift from awkwardly desperate to help Alisaie to becoming so invested in the research that he simply forgot to be anxious. For his own part, S'ria felt like he mostly succeeded in doing a bit of busy work and providing moral support, but that was alright. The important part was that Alisaie and G'raha made it work.

S'ria expected G'raha to be riding that high for days. After all, this was truly an accomplishment for the history books – an accomplishment he made happen, rather than just earnestly recording.

However, something about returning to Mor Dhona made him reset to his prior self-consciousness, blind to his own place among the Scions.

 

"Full glad am I to have helped at all, with something so important."

There was something bittersweet in his voice that S'ria had come to easily recognize by now. 'I could've done more.' It'd been there many times, when he listened to G'raha, and rarely was he sure how to convince him otherwise – but he wasn't going to just let that go, not this time. If nothing else, just this once, he wanted to say his piece.

S'ria stepped closer, placing a hand on G'raha's shoulder. G'raha, startled, met S'ria's eyes – even if that required him to look upwards a good bit.

"G'raha, with all the respect I can give – you're slightly an idiot in regards to yourself." He ignored the look of confused indignation on G'raha's face and continued on undeterred. "–for somehow not recognizing that you're actually brilliant. You're 'glad to have helped at all'? I, and everyone else, all know that this would've been truly impossible without you. And I don't just mean your Allagan blood, I mean the fact that you just continuously pulled lost knowledge out of your head like it was nothing. I mean, you memorized an entirely new type of magic after it was shown on a screen for literally seconds."

"I–I don't–"

S'ria, uncharacteristically, pulled him into a hug. "...I hope you weren't about to disagree with me – it's the truth. I want you to understand how much you continue to impress me at every turn."

G'raha stood there, forehead resting on S'ria's shoulder, caught between the competing urges to start furiously blushing or to start crying. He didn't know what to say to that. For a man being told how much intelligence his mind held, it was rather blank at the moment. The recent sleep deprivation was not helping at all. Twelve help him, that must've been why the only words that managed to tumble out of his mouth were an "oh", followed immediately by a dumbfounded, "I love you".

Oh no. There was a reason he'd never said such a thing. He prepared to be pushed away, for S'ria to berate him in some manner, to be rejected. Instead, S'ria remained as he was, arms still wrapped loosely around G'raha.

"I know."

And that was almost worse, having the lack of subtlety he'd shown confirmed for him. How long ago did S'ria figure this out? He didn't seem… upset, though. And he'd spent all this time with him lately, despite knowing about those feelings. Which meant… which meant what exactly? That wasn't clear. He could easily lose sleep if he didn't stop analyzing this.

G'raha had never really had his feelings not rebuked immediately, so he really wasn't sure where to go from there. Just pretending he never blurted that out was probably not the right path though. G'raha cautiously filed 'have a probably very embarrassing and/or terrifying conversation' onto his ever growing to-do list.