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dizzydancingdreamer · 3 years

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Snapchat Memories and Dead People | The Avengers

Hey my lovelies. As per usual, I can only write when I'm in crises.

Today I woke up and was assaulted by Snapchat with a video of someone I miss laughing; someone whom I know I will never hear laugh again. I think I've watched the video about a hundred times. It's the stupidest fucking video. But the laugh isn't stupid. It's just heartbreaking and fleeting— like the video— and it feels like when the snap memory disappears then he will too and I needed to do something with my thoughts to keep from feeling like I'm going to disappear too.

I hate Snapchat, and I hate missing him, and I hate death, and I hope you all like this piece.

Synopsis: Peter with a camera is either the best or worst thing to ever happen //OR// Snapchat is run by the devil himself

Characters: Peter Parker, James Rhodes, Bruce Banner, Clint Barton, Wanda Maximoff, Sam Wilson, Bucky Barnes (mentioned: Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff, Vision, Steve Rogers)

Warnings: Angst, mentions of death (nothing graphic), general spoilers of the movies (duh), feelings

Word count: 1.1k

They’re Avengers.

They’re the toughest of the tough.

They’re Earth’s mightiest heroes.

And they’re all huddled around Peter Parker— a teenager, sixteen, just barely an Avenger himself— because he’s the one with a Snapchat and so he’s the one with the video of Tony laughing.

It’s nothing professional— just a flimsily shot picture much too zoomed in and shaking in Peter’s unsteady hands— but he’s there and somehow his laugh is so clear that it’s like it’s coming from right next to them. It’s like Tony’s there too, laughing once more over whatever it is Rhodey had said. They can’t remember anymore— not even Rhodey himself. But they— Earth’s mightiest heroes— are all sure for one long moment that if they turn around then they’ll see Tony, death be damned.

So they don’t turn around— because death be damned or not they don’t want him to leave again.

“That laugh used to drive me mental in the labs. Could never think when he was around.” Bruce doesn’t finish his thought— now he can’t even go back in to get his research because it’s too quiet.

“It was even worse in the air. I’ve never heard another person laugh while getting nuked at.” Rhodey adds. He leaves out the part where he hasn’t flown since he died because he’s afraid of the silence.

Everyone else just hums because the video has restarted and Tony’s laugh is like a command— listen to me while you still can.

They do. For once, they do.

After the fifth loop, Rhodey breaks the reverence. “You got anymore videos, kid?”

Peter does. Peter has a lot of them.

The next video is worse— it’s better. They’re not sure what it is but it’s Clint who talks first this time. After all, it's only fitting when it’s his best friend on the screen this time.

“Kid is that—” he can’t even finish his thought— he doesn’t think he ever had one.

His eyes are locked on the flashes of red hair that twirl and twirl and twirl across the screen. It’s like flames lapping at the camera, so close that Clint takes a breath that is echoed through every other person next to him. He feels like he’s going to get burned— he feels like he’s dead too. Dead people can’t be burned, though, and his entire body is definitely on fire. How the Parker boy had managed to capture one of the rare moments of Natasha dancing he has no idea but he’s never been more willing to pay a teenager for his phone.

“Yeah.” Peter’s voice is airy, not quite as rough as Clint’s, still lost all the same. “This was at the movie marathon we had last summer. Well— five summers ago, I guess.”

No one answers when he trails off. They’re all too busy thinking about time. Too busy thinking about death. They’re Earth’s mightiest heroes and not even they can stop either of the two. They all may as well be sixteen too because that’s how they feel. Scared and tired and sixteen.

Peter— scared and tired and actually sixteen— swipes to the next video.

“So the woman turns the turkey into a cat and the audience laughs? That is funny?”

Wanda flinches so hard that she bumps into Sam. The soldier doesn’t say anything and she doesn’t either. Usually she would apologize but not today. She can’t find it in herself to say sorry these days, not when he’s alive and Vis isn’t. It has nothing to do with Sam— nothing to do with her— everything to do with how little she cares about the minor inconveniences of life when all she’s done is obsess over the major inconvenience of death.

“Yes, essentially. It’s easier if you don’t think about it.” Wanda mouths over her own words as they come— she remembers that day vividly.

It’s all she thinks about sometimes.

“What shall I do instead?”

By this point her heart has stopped— the only thing keeping her upright is the love of her life captured on the tiny screen of Peter’s Iphone. She didn’t even hear him taking the video when it happened. She had been too engrossed in Bewitched and in the man next to her. Some people have tried to tell her that he wasn’t a man but the facts are there. The facts being death. He’s dead and only living things can die so he was alive and he was a man and—

Holy shit why is she thinking about this right now!

“Laugh, Vis. You should laugh!”

Wanda walks away. She runs away. Because it doesn’t take being a witch or woman or alive to remember what’s coming next and she doesn’t think she can handle hearing him laugh. She can’t decide if this is an inconvenience of life or of death— or if she’s just a coward. Someone will hear Vis laugh today but it won’t be her.

Peter swipes again and this time it’s not a video.

It’s a picture.

It’s Bucky Barnes. But Bucky Barnes isn’t dead. He should be. By all means Bucky Barnes should be dead. As dead as his best friend, Steve Rogers, is. But he’s not— clearly. A lot of things that should be, aren’t, though. Like how if Peter had only held his thumb down longer then Bucky could have heard Steve tell him it’ll be alright again. It should be a video.

But it’s not a video— it’s a picture, one of Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers with a timestamp of two months ago sitting in the top corner. They’re hugging and if Bucky squints he can see Bruce in the background. Even if he couldn’t see Bruce he would know that moment anywhere. He will always remember the day Steve left, and then came back, and then died. Well, no, he died a few weeks later. But he may as well have died that day.

Bucky didn’t die that day either but he feels like he did so he may as well have too. He may as well be back in Austria with how little he still understands of the world and of Steve Rogers. And of photographs that should be videos. He’s one hundred and six, in a thirty year old body, but no better than a sixteen year old with an okay camera and quiet footsteps.

It’s not Peter’s fault, though, so he pats his shoulders with a huff. “Good shot, kid.”

Maybe it’s better it wasn’t a video anyway, because no matter how many times he hears it he knows that it won’t be alright.

Lies are still lies when they’re told by Earth’s mightiest heroes.

Death is still death— death is still unstoppable— when it comes to the toughest of the tough.

And even the Avengers get Snapchat memories at the worst possible time.

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oikawasass · 4 years

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i rlly couldnt get this idea out of my head so im pausing my prompt writing to do this. its also 4am and this is uneditied so sorry for any typos or grammar issues.

snapchat memories.

‣ pairing: bakugou x fem reader.

‣ drabble.

‣ synopsis: they always say you should never go through old photos after a breakup.

‣ warnings: swearing, light angst.

a loud grunt came from the blonde as he crashed down onto his matress, rubbing his face tiredly.

he stared up at his blank ceiling, zoning out into the white surface. katsuki had felt off all day, though he wasn’t able to put his finger on exactly why. he just felt...like he was forgetting something important.

today...what the fuck is today?

shitty hair’s birthday? no, thats not for another month...

parents aniversarry? no, i never remember when that is anyway...

today...fuck! what the hell is today!

pulling him out of his thoughts was the small ping of his cellphone. bakugou took his hands off his face and groaned in annoyance for the nth time, reaching to grab his phone out of his pocket while ready to chew out whoever had decided to bother him.

snapchat: (1) new notification.

opening the app, he expected to see his groupchat going off as it always did, or kaminari sending him some wack ass pictures he’d taken to avoid studying.

memories: 1 year ago today!

the thumbnail of the small slideshow was a picture of him, with his arm around his now ex girlfriend, (name.)

thats when it dawned on him, exactly what today was.

it would have been their one year.

katsuki gulped, sucking in a breath of air before tapping the screen, opening up the folder of photos and beginning to click through them.

it was some of the photos they took while on one of the many dates the two went on. the one showing up on the screen happened in the downtown, after the couple had spent most of the day trying out different food trucks and various small shops in the area.

it was the day he’d finally decided to ask her to be his girlfriend. the sixth of october, last year.

the photos hadn’t actually been taken by katsuki, but rather by (name) asking to take a few on his phone.

one picture popped up in particular that inevitably made bakugou’s mood drop.

the photo was taken from a lower angle by (name,) who was hugged up against the blonde’s chest, while bakugou had an arm wrapped around her shoulders to keep her there. his chin was rested right atop her head as he looked at something out of frame, while (name) puckered her lips and snapped the picture.

that was bakugou’s phone lockscreen for the entire ten months they were together.

the night evolved from looking back at a few photos, to albums, to old archived social media posts, text messages, videos, anything he had saved from their first date to their breakup.

he scrolled for hours, staying up way past the time he usually liked to go to bed. he completely lost track of time, getting lost in the old memories of when thinfs seemed so much more simple. he had a gentle smile on his face the whole time, despite the growing pit in his stomach.

katuski finally came back to his senses upon a battery warning popping up on his screen. with a deep sigh he turned the cell off, throwing it onto his pillow and rolling back onto his stomach.

why had the even broken up in the first place? sure they had issues, but every couple did. it was nothing that couldn’t be sorted out, right?

wrong.

bakugou, now sitting alone in his room and reminiscing was able to realize that their problems were much more deep rooted than he’d previously believed, constantly ignoring the suffocating question: “was this all my fault?”

he started to neglect their relationship at the start of their second year, getting wrapped up in his school work and hero training like he always did. that was okay, (name) always understood that his life long goal would come first to a highschool relationship.

it was the way he went about it that slowly brought them to their downfall.

rather than saying he’d be back at the dorms late, or couldn’t carry out the plans they’d made because he had extra work to do, he’d begun to ignore the girl, or blow her off completely without a word.

this of course, lead to (name) becoming extremely fed up with the reoccurring behavior, and it showed in her much more snappy attitude and temper.

they fought, they argued, they hit eachother in their weak points to make the other upset, the couple did nothing but fight, fight, fight.

bakugou was the one who said he was finished with the whole thing one night in a rather nasty argument. he stormed out after, and they hadn’t spoken since. kirishima got any of bakugou’s belongings from (name,) and mina got any of (name’s) belongings from bakugou. the two refused to utter a word to eachother now, its been that way for two months without break.

katsuki came to realize the pit that had been growing in his stomach was guilt. he felt bad for ending things the way he did, being childish and neglectful, and he missed her.

letting his head fall to the right, he stared at his phone, the angel and devil on each of his shoulders arguing back and forth.

text her.

no, dont text her are you fucking stupid?

but i feel like an asshole.

you’re gonna be even more of an asshole if you text her right now. and its midnight? it’ll look like a booty call.

well im gonna text her anyway.

dont fucking text her.

but i want to.

but you shouldnt.

text her.

dont text her!

bakugou reached out and grabbed his phone, opening up his text messages and clicking on her contact.

bakugou

| 00:12: hey.

bakugou

| 00:12: can we talk?

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #boku no hero academia #bnha #bakugo katsuki #bnha x reader #bnha fanfiction #my hero academia #bakugo headcanons #bakugo oneshot #mha bakugou katsuki #bakugou oneshot #bakugou fanfiction #bakugou angst #mha bakugou #mha angst

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immortalbutonlybyname · 5 years

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Reviewing Dramas I have watched part 3

My rating system goes like this: 1- Did not like, 2- Enjoyed but probably wouldn’t watch again, 3- Enjoyed and would watch some episodes again (or for movies may watch again), 4- Enjoyed and would watch again, 5- Loved

TV Series

Pinocchio: 4/5

Trigger warning: Suicide, Victim blaming, attempted murder, actual murder

Pinocchio is about a kid who, after a massive tragedy blown up and twisted by the media causes his mother to attempt a murder suicide by throwing them both in the ocean, gets washed ashore a small neighboring island and takes on the identity of a old man with dementia’s deceased son. Him along with his “niece” who has Pinocchio syndrome, where one will get uncontrollable hiccups whenever they lie, must work to become reporters for two different goals and find themselves facing a giant conspiracy and a question of fact versus impact in media. I really enjoyed this show, it was especially nice how each episode was named after a children’s story. I began this show because I really loved Lee Jong-Suk’s acting in High School 2015 and I was not disappointed. The episodes had a lot of painful scenes but also plenty of funny scenes to balance it out. It kept my interest really well throughout and I don’t remember an episode where I was bored. It does have darker themes so I would be wary of those if you are sensitive to such themes.

I Can Hear Your Voice: 4/5

Trigger Warning: Attempted murder, Actual murder, Victim blaming

I Can Hear Your Voice follows a woman who witnessed the murder of a father and the attempted murder the victim’s son, despite her fear she decides to testify as a witness. Her statement and evidence as a witness gets the criminal a guilty sentence, effectively making the murder wish to seek revenge. Years later, she is a lazy, cold public defense attorney who does not care for her clients and lacks manners, the young man whom she saved from the murderer and helped is actually a telepath and they meet again. The two of them, along with a former police officer turned lawyer, work together to help those who are truly innocent while also protecting themselves once the murderer has finished his sentence and begins to seek revenge. This show was great, it was funny, sad, annoying, and cute. I watched this one shortly after Pinocchio and it was kind of similar in feel but personally a little more interesting in my opinion. There were a lot of moral dilemmas that not only the characters but I as a viewer struggled with. I even got on my group chat with my friends and asked them about the issues and they struggled as well. I liked a lot of the characters, including the female prosecutor who is the main’s rival. Overall a really great show, definitely worth watching.

Flower Crew: Joseon Marriage Agency: 5/5

Warnings: Forced suicide, OCD/Nervous habit/ possible hint to self-harm warning.

Flower Crew is about a former, escaped slave who becomes a member of the most sought-after marriage agency in Joseon era Korea after her husband disappears before their wedding leaving her with many debts to the aforementioned agency. She soon finds herself in a very sensitive situation of pretending to be noble and going through the queen choosing tests to save her slave brother, all while trying to decide if she loves the cold, stand offish leader of the marriage agency or if her heart is still after her missing fiance. The best thing about this show is that each character gets their backstory and closure they needed. Usually with shows, my favorite characters (as they are usually the secondary ones) never get the closure or even backstory they deserve. In usual my review fashion, I will not lie to you, I found out about this show about a week before the first episode aired and decided to watch it as it aired mainly because Park Ji-hoon was one of the main actors in it, and he didn’t let me down, he was a proper cringey asshole but I loved him so much. I was worried as the show progressed that he wouldn’t have a proper backstory and only the few hints they threw at me that I would have to piece together, but I was more than pleased when his arc finally came. It was definitely worth the wait and while waiting I ended up loving all the other characters and actors/actresses involved in this show. Definitely would recommend however, dark themes are a regular.

Beating Again (aka Falling for Innocence): 4/5

Trigger Warning: Heart conditions

Beating Again or Falling for Innocence depending on where you watch it, is about a stern, cold hearted man with a genetic heart disease and a kind but serious secretary whose father betrayed the main character’s father when they were kids making them enemies. After a set of coincidences, the main character goes through a heart transplant and ends up with the heart of the secretary’s husband. Shortly after the transplant he begins to experience new mannerisms and personality traits that were once the husbands as well as finding himself falling for his secretary. Throughout the show they work to fix his past mistakes, trying to find out what exactly happened to the secretary’s husband, all while figuring out if he is the one in love or if it is his heart who loves her. I really enjoyed this drama; it was more on the serious side most times but had some great humorous moments as well. It also did an amazing job at pissing me off towards the end, most kdrama’s do but this ish was next level anger. I saw it on YouTube and decided to watch it while bored one day and I was not disappointed it was such a great show.

Who Are You School 2015: 2/5

Trigger Warning: Attempted suicide, HEAVY Bullying, Depression, Victim blaming,

Who Are You School 2015 is about two long lost twins, one living the life of a pretty well off school bully and the other still living in an orphanage and being ruthlessly bullied. After the bullied twin attempts suicide by jumping off a bridge, the adopted twin who just happened to be nearby due to a school trip saves her. The bullied twin wakes up with amnesia and gets mistaken as the adopted twin, but as she gains her memory she discovers that while she lived the twin who saved her died in her place leaving her with not only guilt for surviving but also with the blame of the death of a friend from her sisters past. This story deals with finding who she truly is and coming to terms with her past while also trying to find the truth behind her sister’s past. This was a good show, however it took me forever to finish as the content messed with my own mental state if I watching too many episodes at one time (and I am a perfectly healthy person mentally so please be careful when choosing to watch), a few episodes was okay for me but when I first attempted to binge it was not a very good idea. I did honestly watch it for Yook Sungjae as I loved his performance in Goblin and while I knew what I was getting into, I did not expect it to affect me as much, his acting is great as usual and his story line just broke my heart. This show also does have a love triangle and it’s honestly the worst written most dissatisfying love triangle I have probably ever personally seen, so, there’s that. Once again very good show, however, practice caution if you are at all sensitive to these topics.

A Korean Odyssey: 5/5

Trigger Warning: Jump Scares, Anorexia, Self-Harm (sort of)

A Korean Odyssey is loosely based off of the famous Chinese story A Journey to the West. It follows Jin Seon Mi, a young girl who can see ghosts and Son O-gong, a former monkey deity reduced to the status of a common monster after being punished and kicked out of the spirit realm. After Seon Mi frees O-gong from the marble mountains she is cursed with the fate of Samjang, a human who must protect the world from evil spirits. If the Samjang is devoured, the monster who eats her becomes incredibly and uncontrollably powerful. O-gong wants to eat her to gain this power, however a deal made to get Seon-Mi to release him from the mountains, stops him. In fear of O-gong, Seon Mi, with the help of the demon king, gives the monkey deity a Geumganggo, a magical bracelet which makes it impossible to go against the words of or hurt the one who has gifted it, with an unexpected side effect, he is now uncontrollably in love with her. Now Seon Mi has to deal with saving the world from horrible destruction all while dealing with a head over heels and hating every second of it, deity meanwhile questioning both her feelings for him and his true feelings for her. I absolutely love this show. It is my favorite kdrama to date, I am actually watching it a second time with my friend and we are about halfway through, then a few days ago started watching it over again with my older sister so I would say this was deserving of a 5 ranking. I really love all the characters honestly (minus the main bad guys but no spoilers, if you’ve seen it you know who they are) they are all equally assholes and precious children who must be protected. I have to admit though, my favorite story line was the devil king and my favorite character has got to be the shopkeeper’s grandson despite his lack of scenes. I have never seen or heard of One (Jung Jae-won) before this show but I love him so much now. I actually watched this for Hong-ki (notice a pattern, but hey, at least I am honest in my biases.), but I finished this show with more favorite characters than I thought was possible. It does have ghosts and demons which can be creepy to some, but as someone who has yet to be affected by scary movies such as The Ring, and the whole Conjuring series, it really just looks to me like those demon snapchat filters so it’s not actually scary. Overall an amazing show, definitely recommend, 110% worth watching.

Korean Movies

Secretly, Greatly: 5/5

Trigger Warnings: Graphic images of gore, Mass suicide mentioned, Suicide, Death and Loss

Secretly, Greatly is about three North Korean spies who were sent to South Korea and are given disguises as a fool, an aspiring singer, and a high school student. They soon become accustomed to South Korean lifestyle and find happiness in each other, wanting to live their lives happily instead of spying for North Korea. After an information leak of all the identities of the North Korean spies they must stick together to survive while being hunted down by both sides. It’s a movie about finding family and happiness even in the toughest situations, questioning where one’s loyalty lies, and the strength of the bonds between those who have nothing but each other.

Northern Limit Line: 2/5 and 5/5 explained below

Trigger Warning: Graphic images of gore, Death and Loss, Actual funeral footage,

Northern Limit line is a movie based of the true story of the North Korean attack of South Korean naval ships during the 2002 FIFA World Cup. It follows the crew members on one of the navy patrol boats, from when Corporal Park Dong-hyuk joins, to after the attack. This movie is really great, and I still love it. The ONLY reason I am giving this a 2/5 is because it messed me up for three whole days afterward. I was an emotional wreck; I had no previous knowledge of this attack and the extent of my knowledge of the movie going in was that it was based off a true incident of a North Korean attack. While I don’t regret watching it, I would probably never watch it again unless I really really wanted to and had like 3 days of free time to be emotionally damaged simply because of the heavy content of the movie thus the 2/5. It is rather graphic with quite a few shocking scenes and even real clips of the actual funerals of the fallen crew members and their families grieving. I cried, and honestly still feel like crying as I am writing this. I did lots of research on the incident afterward as well to further understand the content of the movie. Every actor did amazing in portraying the highs and lows of serving in the South Korean navy and the eventual close friendship between all of the crew only made it even more tragic. If you are able to handle the heavy material of this movie, I highly recommend it as it truly is an amazing and sad story that everyone should see at least once.

The Con Artists: 4/5

The Con Artists is about Ji-hyuk, a thief that specializes in safe-cracking who teams up with the young genius hacker Jong-bae, and the planner Goo-in for their biggest mission yet, to steal $150 million from Incheon Customs in 40 minutes. This show was pretty good, I liked all the twists and turns as the movie basically took you on a roller coaster ride throughout. At one point I was thoroughly pissed off, but I was played, and it only made the movie better. If you are looking for plot twists galore, you are in the right place with this one. I can’t really say much about it without giving any spoilers (that’s how elaborate it is) so I shall end this review here. Highly recommend!

Taiwanese Movies

Secrets in the Hot Springs: 5/5

Trigger Warning: Death and Loss, Jump Scares, ghosts

Three teens who have begrudgingly, at least to two of them, become friends go to one of the characters families hot spring to help run the place during school break, strange and hilarious things begin happening around them. They now must figure out the secret behind the mysterious hot spring. Personally, I feel this movie is so underrated, so much so I can not even find a gif for it so, have a picture. I decided randomly to watch this movie after boredom scrolling through Netflix one day and I am so glad I did. I thoroughly enjoyed it and did end up watching it again the day after. It’s really cute, if not a little awkward at points, and definitely hilarious. I didn’t find it exactly scary because the humor really distracted me. Some of the humor might not land exactly right with some people, like the constant mention and jokes of two of the boys being in a relationship together when neither were gay. I personally didn’t mind these and see them simply as a culture difference, but some may be a little more sensitive to these materials. Overall, I recommend this movie to anyone who wants a funny, slightly suspenseful, feel good movie to watch.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Part 5

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chaosenticed-blog · 5 years

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greetings angels ! i’m steven, going by she/her pronouns and miserably lodged in the pst timezone, also currently known as the devil’s taint thanks to this heatwave ! super fun ! pls bear with me , i’ll be up everyone’s asses for plots with my lil dudebro shithead 𝖘𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖘 , he’s a new muse of mine i’ve conjured up bc ethan is just too good looking to not utilize ? i’ll keep this short so we can pull a queen carly rae and cut to the feeling ~

❛ chicago’s very own 𝖘𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖘 𝖉𝖎 𝖌𝖗𝖎𝖒𝖆𝖑𝖉𝖎 has been spotted in new york city in his jeep wrangler blackhawk , welcome ! your resemblance to ethan dolan is unreal. according to tmz, you just had your twentieth birthday bash. your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐔𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐓 , but being 𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 might help you. i guess being a taurus explains that. three things that would paint a better picture of you would be 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐋 𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐅𝐈𝐓𝐒, 𝐓𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃, 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐃 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐕𝐎𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐔𝐍𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐃. & ( cismale & he / him / his )

aesthetic :

playing guitar barefooted in a hammock, sun kissed skin and a half-kept beard, knowing all the vegan options at the city’s boujiest restaurants, a crooked grin saved for whoever he can tell needs it most, overthinking his next move even if it seems completely organic, a boyish laugh at the most asinine pranks, c-’s littering his transcript ( except the a earned in environmental science, his elective of choice ), calling instead of texting because texting “ loses the humanity, ” casual nights spent oversized hoodies, yellow checkered vans, shorts with a 60-day chip in the left pocket, yelling out species of trees passing by over thumping bass beats on a road trip, sweat on designer-clothed skin like glitter, doing head counts of “the squad” over and over in the rear view mirror on the way home from a rager, random stupid tattoos done “ for the memory, ” intricate handshakes performed with ease. acting like you don’t care, but you do— god you do, sometimes so much it consumes you whole.

inspired by :

jim halpert from the office, jackson maine from a star is born, jim hawkins from treasure planet, jackson avery and owen hunt from grey’s anatomy.

history :

born to a major chicago councilman father and a ceo mother, the middle of three boys, silas found himself drawn outside until the sun came down, connecting to whatever the earth was able to give him in the inhospitable chicago weather . he’d wander aimlessly for hours, guiding his twin and their older brother through the trails he made himself . his home wherever he could make it — the branches of creaking trees at the park , the caverns of frosted caves , he learned to be content with the little things , humble and rooted firmly in his beliefs of morality and logic .

it was never exactly fun to play the role of the son in the limelight, eyes on his family whenever his parents where on a particularly tricky trip . his eldest brother, julien, was a parent’s dream and easily took up a political career without any complications . balancing in the shadow of his eldest brother and the push of his twin , silas kept his own hopes and dreams on the back burner , prioritizing a family name before his own desires ( and thus , the apparition begins. )

he knows the eyes are on him to carry on the family legacy , and does the bare minimum possible to keep his uptight parents off his back . he went to the private schools , played the big name sports , mingled with the a-listers . he fills the role to please his family and keep the peace , but once the light comes off him , he pushes off against the prim and proper upbringing and finds his own stride . though he takes the classes and attends the conferences to make his father think he’s prime for having his name in the news , silas could not be bothered to carry the illusion on into the rest of his life . nights are spent at raves , hiking canyons off the grid , indulging himself .

yet all this time spent trying to fit into a future he never asked for folded over on him , as one would readily expect . the beginning of his freshman year , it was exposed that his father had carried on with an affair nearly two decades ago and kept it secret until now , resulting in a half-sister close to his age and an onslaught of media attention on his once-pristine family . now , his father remaining in chicago and his mother moving to new york to helm her medical cosmetics business with a renewed vigor , silas chooses to make the jump to new york wit his mom . to his chagrin , she notes a political run in her future that puts silas on edge , forcing him to really come to terms with living the life his family will forever ask of him .

never one to particularly enjoy attention, the added pressure of trying to repair his family’s reputation ( and keep mum on the bitter divide caused within his family ) drove him to a point where anything he could use to escape would become a viable option . smiling for cameras and keeping up appearances in public led to binge drinking and benders galore in private , ultimately ending with his twin brother hauling him to the emergency room after a particularly brutal night . a stint in rehab this last summer ( explained as “ humanitarian work in the middle east ” ) led to silas’ newfound perspective on life— struggling every day to keep in mind who he is, and who he feels he has to be for the world .

personality :

silas’ upbringing has been rocky to say the LEAST, and despite half the shit he’s gone through he’s managed to keep a pretty solid head on his shoulders ?

i’ve been playing emo broody boys so often i wanted to switch it up and lowkey ? silas is a breath of fresh air okay . he’s your quintessential frat bro but with ~layers~ and none of the tragic manic pixie dream boy . he comes across as a reserved and non-talkative kind of guy, stoic at first meeting, but with time and comfort people find he’s really just a cool laid-back dude . he’s the dad friend of the group and spends as much time caring for others as he can possibly allow between his totally booked schedule of pretending to be a preppy boy and literally not giving a shit about most things.

he loves nature and hiking and being outside just as much as he loves a good party , which is where festivals and the rave scene come into play . he loves sharing good energy with the people around him and tries to keep the peace within his circles. silas has a genuinely kind and benevolent heart , one he doesn’t expose readily but also doesn’t ignore . he uses humor and quiet observations of others to keep himself ahead of the loop, even if his generally bro-ish personality leads people to believe he’s inattentive or ignorant . he’s responsible and mature and deeply intelligent, but most of all, has common sense and doesn’t let a decision be made without weighing the pros and cons .

( for the most part . )

silas has forever been recognized as inheriting his father’s impulsivity , a trait he absolutely fears after seeing the terror it wreaked on his family . he pushes himself to be smart and rational, trying to see the logic in all things , and tries to be as disciplined as he can manage . when other factors come into the equation though , he struggles to keep up his resolve and will easily lose himself in the moment . he has an addictive and ultimately reckless personality , which led to his addiction and consequential rehabilitation . he tries to minimize the time he spends with people that may lead him down a path he doesn’t want to go down , but obviously not everything goes as planned .

otherwise , silas is stubborn but considerate of others . he’s intelligent and creative but very poorly motivated , mostly doing things for the sake of his family and letting little else bother him . he’s loyal and sensitive to the emotions of others , but is the first to call out bullshit if it surrounds him . he’s almost painfully mellow and is notorious for not having buttons to press lmao . he just doesn’t let most people’s comments get to him . he has no issue in cutting out the things ( or people ) he has no interest in spending his time on and can come across as a bit forward in this regard . he can be hypocritical and overly complex , having conflicting feelings that he can’t explain or rationalize and lead to him snapping or breaking down . he’s deeply jealous and has a bad habit of overthinking and not letting others bear his burden with him .

as of now, silas isn’t sure where he wants to take his future . very few know about his stint in rehab, and he explains his lack of drugs or drinking as his preparation to be a walk-on for the wrestling team at NYU where he attends , as his mother has been encouraging him to pursue in order to build a fanbase base for his future political conquests . currently, he does modeling for a casual platform and represents certain brands he’s actually rather passionate about . he’d LITERALLY rather d*e than go into politics, and is eyeing a future in environmental advocacy or ambassador work , but knows this is not a future aligned with the di grimaldi legacy . for now , he remains at a crossroads , living half a life he doesn’t even recognize , just hoping it’ll manage itself on its own .

connections :

forbidden ( 0/2 ) — best friend’s gf ? his brother’s ex ? his sister’s best friend ? basically i want someone who silas wants but can’t have because of another relationship that could REALLY put them in a dangerous spot and potentially ruin what they have, but it’s all hidden glances and risky snapchats trying to gauge where the line is and where it can be crossed

exes ( 0/? ) — gimmie angst, gimmie chill, gimmie people who mutually broke up and are bros, give me people who had a messy split and it’s still touchy, give me people who are “ supposed to be over ” but end up in each other’s beds at the end of every other night, give me people who fucking hate each other, this is so versatile i’ll take anything.

“ gucci shoes, boy i invented you ” ( 0/1 )— a fake gf he had for the clout, someone who really helped him live up to the image his family wanted for him, basically helped “ make him ” and in the process, she fell in love with him. did he feel the same way ? did he not realize it ? did he simply not reciprocate ? either way, they ended poorly and now she resents him and thinks he’s a cowardly piece of shit, since she’s seen the “ real him ” vs the him she helped conjure. lots of tension !

turn up team ( 0/4 ) — basically : whos gonna go rave with him ? he’s not gonna roll w them if drugs are involved but he’ll enjoy his adrenaline high with pleasure. these are people who aren’t close enough to him to pressure him into doing drugs again, so he feels okay with going out with them since there’s little to no risk he’ll relapse

squad ( 0/3-4 ) — i’m thinking a small group of people who he’s just always likely to be found with, these are the people who matter most to him and u can hella catch him fathering them almost to an ANNOYING extent. they get to see the best ( and sometimes the worst ) of him, but he’d do anything for his squad

devil on his shoulder ( 0/2 ) — this can be as intentionally or unintentionally toxic as u want, but i’m basically envisioning two people who really tempt silas to risk it all. maybe they want him to dive back into the hedonistic side he has ( he was wild and lots of people lowkey hyped him up for it ) and it’s gritty and sexy and dark. maybe this person doesn’t even realize they’re a trigger for him and unintentionally send him close to the edge.

sponsors / confidants ( 0/2 ) — i’m envisioning a team of 3 who have been THROUGH it with the substance abuse, maybe they stage “ improvised meetings ” whenever they need to, maybe these are just two people who want to make sure silas stays clean because they know how badly he needs it and how dangerous it would be for him to relapse

vlog squad ( ? ) — my idea is that silas and his twin brother are youtubers, and silas is a BIG paranormal shit guy. it’s like the perfect intersection of talking about nature and exploration without making him seem like a hippie tree-hugger and raise any objections from his parents, so maybe he has like a little group similar to the vlog squad where they share a channel and they have a small following?

i’m putting in a wc for his twin brother and his half-sister so peep THOSE

sibling-like friendship, booty calls, hookups, people he’s in a club on campus with, childhood friends, maybe a penpal he had after moving around from place to place ?

please literally give me anything that makes me smile or suffer ? and all in between . muah lov u all can’t wait to rp !

#wealthyhq:intro #this is a mess but i'll post my discord in a sec since i'm going mobile !

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justasmalltowngirl-posts-blog · 5 years

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CHAPTER FOUR.

A couple of days went by before I went back to the shop. Alain was very apologetic when I told him that I needed to leave for a few days for my grandmother’s funeral. He was able to share with me a similar situation when his mother passed away and it was easier for me to go through this difficult time when someone can understand where I’m coming from. I decided to tattoo all day before leaving this weekend. Drawing brings me away from negative energy and especially to get away from times like this. I’ve been receiving tons of messages on Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat with post that I’ve put out to the public with my grandmother. This waive of love is giving me a warm hug and I’m very thankful for that. I took a few walk-ins for small or big tattoos, it doesn’t matter for today and gradually, those clients we’re able to change my mind and share their grief experience with me. I think I’m prepared to face this dark day and take one day at a time and let myself know that she’s happy where she’s at and her pain is finally gone forever.

I took a break to go get something to eat near the tattoo shop. This vegan place is so good and I love the beyond meat burgers that they have and everything is homemade. Yes, it is a bit expensive, but when I want something good and healthy, I go there. I place my order for to go because I wanted to continue this big project I started this morning before my first client. I usually don’t eat at the shop for sanitary reasons, but today, I’m making an exception. I didn’t even open the door to enter the shop that I was surprise to see Tyler talking with Alain near the front desk. He has this type of shirt who was showing all the details of his upper body. Those muscles, his abs and those tattoos, oh my lord, I’m gonna lose my mind over that kid. I push the door with my left hip and I gave him a little smile.

“Wow! That smell’s so good. Can I taste...”

Alain tried to sneak in my bag to grab some fries and give a little slap on the top of his fingers so back off.

“Hey, no touchy. I know how sneaky you are little Fries stiller.” I said with a corner smile and I turn my attention to Tyler with my left hand on my hip.

“Hey beautiful.”

“Hey…”

“How you feelin’?”

“I’m OK. I mean, I guess I will pass through all that. It’s just, I wonder if it’s because I was not around enough or she didn’t wanted to tell anyone that she was sick but…”

“Hey come here.” Said Tyler with is arms wide open.

I wasn’t sure if it was a friendly hug or not. I wanted to think otherwise but I enjoy the moment of being in the arms of somebody else and especially Tyler’s. He was warm and was giving me chills. I do have a low body temperature, but nothing major to bring me to the hospital and no, I’m not a vampire. Even if I wish to be one sometimes, but I’m not. I took a few steps back and catch his beautiful dark brown eyes. This feeling that I’m having right now is very different. It’s like he gave me this vision of what would it look like in the future me and… him. Just the way he was holding me in his arms and how he was touching me, it was like electricity rushing threw my veins. I look at him with a smile and he started to mention that he wanted to start a chest piece. Lord, Jesus take the wheel I’m over my head right now with this idea and seeing him with no shirt on, if I had a mic in my end, I’ll drop it. I took of a few ideas he had saved in is phone and I brought him to my station to make some measurements. I put a side my lunch who was smelling so good in my office and my stomach was starting to give me this weird burning feeling when you didn’t eat for a few hours. I wanted to take my time with Tyler and spend some time with him and just enjoy is presents here. I was even surprise to see him here, but I’m also very present on social media. In the end, it was not very surprising to be honest.

I took a little measuring tape from my desk and face him to analyse is chest.

“Can you take off your shirt please?” I ask very fast with my voice who was cracking.

I was biting my bottom lip so hard while seeing him taking of is Under Armor shirt. My heart was doing 360’s under my sternum and I starting to feel a little bit dizzy. I needed to concentrate to not faint in is perfect muscular arms. It took a few second before I gain back my sense and took a big deep breath before I ask him to put is arms on a 180 degree angle for me to take some measurement.

“Your hands are ice cold.” Said Tyler while feeling some goose bumps on is skin.

“I’m sorry. I can put some latex gloves if you want.” I said while looking at him in dark brown eyes.

“It’s OK. I don’t mind that.” He says with a smile that brought colors to my face.

I smile at him, a little shy but being with him, it’s like my life here is getting easy. I was done working on his chest and he put back is shirt on before taking a sit on my tattoo chair. A little moment of silences was making things a little bit awkward but I was not feeling uncomfortable about it.

“Are you leaving just for the weekend?”

“No, I’m taking a week off. My plans are a bit different now because I was supposed to leave in two weeks for her birthday actually, but anyway… I wish I was seeing my family in a different matter.”

He nodded a little with a smile. I pressed my chin on my left fist and excel heavily. I’m having second thoughts about those days I’m gonna spend in Ottawa and I shouldn’t but I can’t help it. I guess I’m not only one in my family with weird thoughts because it’s never easy and what is even stupid it’s that we gonna back on our normal routine. We gonna take back life like that nothing never happen, but there will be always this little soft spot for this memory who will never leave us. Some people take it the good way and others, it can be confusions, weird or they can be hangry all their lives. For my part, its confusion and it’s gonna be weird to not see her. Pictures will always bring back the best memories that I have with her. I’m proud to say that she’s my grandmother.

“I feel you and I think a beautiful girl like needs to be happy all the time and I was wondering, since I have the day off today, would you like to go for dinner tonight?”

This question sound like I won a million dollars at the lottery. How can I be that lucky? It’s like it’s not even a real question who was just ask and my little angel on my right shoulder was beating my little devil on left shoulder to push to say yes. I don’t care if make other girls being jealous because oh Lord, it’s a gigantic YES!

“Well, that will be fantastic. It’s a yes.” I said with a big smile.

The reaction of Tyler priceless. He was like a little kid in candy store, very excited to get what he wants but the feelings I have every time I see him and talk to him, it’s always positive. It’s like I knew him before and he understands me on a lot of things.

“Text me your address, I will come get you at 7PM tonight.” He said standing up before leaving my office.

I gave him a wink with a big smile. I was happy yes and very excited about that special night. I texted right away my home address before I put my head back on my project. I wanted to finish at least 90% of it before leaving for the rest of the day. I must say I was a bit nervous, but nothing major. It’s normal to be nervous and it’s a reaction that with cannot control at 100% and the last time I was on a date, it was not that pretty. I still have nightmares about that night and I just wish I never met that man.

***

I was more and more nervous about tonight. I’ve spent almost an hour to choose the right outfit and still, I’m having second thoughts about it because I don’t even know where we are going. I was wearing a black strapless jump suit with a pair of gold Michael Kors sandals. It was a very simple look with my air loose brushed on one side. My air was wavy and shiny with the glitter who was in my shampoo. I only use that shampoo for good reasons and tonight was a very excuse to use it. I wanted to go out without make up, but I decided to draw a very simple black line on my eye leads to pop out my eyes even more. No more no less and Tyler just texted me that he was in front of my apartment building. I took a deep breath before going out of my apartment. I make sure that the door is locked before I leave. I keep telling myself that I’m strong and confidante and I didn’t need to be afraid of anything. I know that nothing bad will happen with him. I just need to trust him.

#hockey #nhl #nhl hockey #dallas stars #tyler seguin #lights poxleitner #lights #hockey story #love story

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goldenscript · 7 years

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coffee wars

↳ prompt: barista rivals au + donghyuck

pairing: lee donghyuck | reader genre: rivals to lovers au / fluff word count: 6,491 description: the ongoing rivalry between you and Lee Donghyuck all comes to a standstill when feelings get involved. author’s note: very loosely based on this prompt!

Everything starts with the flat white.

It’s a small detail, almost easy to miss if someone doesn’t think to look twice. There comes adoration for the ones who take notice, something in the small design on the tops of their coffees seems to tickle their fancies. Thus leading into a snapshot found on Instagram or even making a spotlight on their Snapchat stories. To you, that’s absolutely everything—the details, the response, the damn flat white.

It’s hard to achieve too. The very accents and details are no easy feat, and it’s something you’ve prided yourself in since your mastery of the skill. You have a steady hand and a keen eye for the very designs that come to mind, whether they’re pre-conceived or doodles you’ve been given free reigns on. And because of this, it rubs you the wrong way when you hear customers gush about the Dreamie’s latest innovation. Though you haven’t been working at 127’s that long, you know for damn sure this isn’t their thing. Their appeal is the cute, soft hues of pastel pinks and blues, their bubble letter logo plastered at the top and on the wall aside their hanging menu in the curly font, and the customer service each of the workers offered with a jovial gleam in their eyes and an unsuspecting smile curled on their visages.

Of course, you know it isn’t a coincidence that they emerged with something new. Yuta and Jaehyun still laugh at the memory of the Flat Lines that came out of the Dreamie’s being adventurous, and it was only because of the sudden emergence of a certain auburn-haired boy that those lines were becoming something other than white blobs and laughable outcomes. Since Lee Donghyuck’s arrival, he’s been nothing but an aggravator, a perpetrator, a damn solicitor that relishes in your gritted teeth and firm lips, because the flat white is your thing and he knows it. Everyone knows it.

Yet he still has the gall to gloat, to smile at you from across the street with an all too beautiful curl of your lips that you’d rather choke on than aloud. He’s handsome, you’ll admit (begrudgingly, of course), with sun-kissed skin and a laugh that could swallow you whole in an encompassing warmth if you weren’t reminded of his spite when you saw him and his stupid eyebrow raise on such a daily basis no matter the case. But it comes most especially when you’re both serving customers outside and he hears even just one comment about Dreamie’s, because somehow his hearing supersedes regular ability when a compliment is coming his way in your presence or whenever one of said customers is a regular to your respective establishments and he is the one who gets Mark that day.

It’s ridiculous, really. You’ve never been a jealous person. Competitive, maybe. But sometimes you feel the ugly green monster creep on your shoulder, because it’s like Donghyuck has won over you (in more ways than one). And since both of your employments and your inadvertent inactions, you refuse to back down and lose to him. It’s an instinct, practically second nature at this point. Everyone in both your cafés know the situation albeit find it hard to really comprehend, but you’re often too busy warding off the suggestive comments that implicate there is more than just a platonic rivalry amidst you two, because hell no, are you two dating. (Would you mind it? Probably not. But are you ever going to admit it? N-o. No.)

“Your boyfriend’s staring again,” Yuta muses, nudging your side. It’s like a daily nicety to hear next to “Hi, how are you?” at this point, but it doesn’t stop you from fighting the urge to frown. As expected, the moment you look up to face the pastel building, he’s there in the veranda with a half-smile adorning his visage, and he even goes as far as giving you a wave.

You glare at him in response, trying to ignore the fluttering in your chest as his smile deepens.

Goddammit... it’s too early for this.

—

He’s at it again.

This time the decoration of his cursed flat white actually mirrors yours, but there’s an added design that makes his rendition of Pochacco much cuter than yours. You actually feel your bottom lip pull over your top one because the damn soccer ball is perfect with the piece. It’s hard to admit aloud but, you do give him props for constantly trying to one up you.

Between the character designs and the small messages, you can see how talented he is. Even the gushing from shared customers is almost expected, from the gleam in their eyes at the charming red head of Dreamie’s right down to the influx of comments that come from posts involving his pieces. You feel a spark of envy course through you, a small frown almost always readily forming but what gets you the most isn’t the fact that you wish it was you receiving such a response (because you’ve had enough of it yourself prior to his sudden upheaval), but rather how the very mention of him riles up your heart by a few hundred beats. Of course, you stop yourself from showing your usual look of disdain until you’re not in the presence of the beloved customers.

“He’s at it again?” Mark says, prying you from listening in on the adjacent table’s jabber about your multi-talented rival.

You give a nod, knowing all too well how easily this routine has gone since the start of this three-month back and forth against that cursed boy. Well, not all the beloved customers.

For you and Donghyuck, Mark Lee is the one person who’s been the middleman in your unofficial competition. The very person who can both simultaneously make or break the both of you with a simple photo-op or a blissful smile. He’s the decider, the judge, the customer. And, he is very aware of what is going on between you two. He can’t even pretend he doesn’t see what’s going on either. But the smile poised on his lips is unsuspecting and far from removed on the whole ordeal, and it’s almost as irritating as Jaehyun and Yuta’s pestering about Donghyuck when he—the supposedly rational one in all of this—brings it up too.

Which has been an additional factor to your already pre-established banter, not that it hasn’t lessened its status as a nuisance.

“Any chance of you confessing yet?”

He smirks at you and quirks an upward brow at you shake your head furiously, cheeks growing warm.

Recovering, you glower at him with playfulness shimmering over your narrowed eyes, “Not happening.”

“But when?” he huffs, graciously accepting his usual caramel macchiato. There’s only a simple leaf atop of it, but what comes with his napkin is a small scrawl of “You roast my heart!” inscribed upon it and that’s what earns you a squeaky laugh from the blond. “Okay, that was cute.”

“Thanks,” you grin, secretly thanking Yuta for his endless bounds of coffee-related pick-up lines. At the least, 127’s charismatic charm has always been a winner in that respect. “Better than that punk’s, right?”

He exhales a breathy laugh, shaking his head at you. “Yes, Y/N. Better than his, though not by much.”

“You’re kidding,” you immediately say, tilting your head at him. “He’s getting better at those too?”

Taking a sip of the caramel goodness, a grin so blatantly prominent alongside his cheekbones, “He never sucked in the first place.”

“Don’t tell me you’ve been coerced into the dark side already.” Your jaw drops, earning yet another chuckle thrown into the air. Though you’ve yet to pride yourself in the matter, you find it almost hard to believe that your unbiased customer would be biased so soon.

“No, no,” he shakes his head, simply lifting his shoulders as he eyes you with a gleam of irritable knowledge. “Just waiting.”

“For?” you ask, regardless of the nagging feeling that you already know the answer.

He replies, as if it were the most simple conclusion: “That way I’ll never have to decide between the both of you.”

“Not happening,” you repeat yourself, this time letting the words roll off your tongue in the form of a scoff. You’ve already decided that you’ve spent far too much time with Mark, thinking through a possible excuse to leave him.

Today’s a slow day, but you needn’t get Taeyong on your ass about talking crap about Donghyuck again. He made you clean up the machines with Doyoung last time, and you literally swore that if you stayed even a minute longer with the guy than you had to, then you would’ve suffered the loss of your two valuable assets, because somehow in that slim figure of his is a mouth that could literally talk anyone’s ears off. It isn’t that you didn’t appreciate the distraction either, what with your daily grievances enacted by a certain someone, but more often than not, his name would come up and you aren’t very sure you can keep up your ongoing façade in how you have absolutely no feelings for him.

“Wait,” Mark says, dragging you from your thoughts with another question poised on his froth-covered lips. It almost makes you regret hesitating when he continues, “Don’t lie, Y/N. You do like him, don’t you?”

You frown a little, barely enough for anyone but him to see what your expression truly is, as a sense of resolve readily courses through your veins. Of course, a denial is already about to tumble out of your mouth. The only thing that seems to stop you is the fact that this is Mark. Not your co-workers or the Devil himself. In a way, he’s acted as your confidant, your go-to since you both acquainted yourselves with one another.

“So what?” you let out a sigh, dragging your gaze to the pastel hue with your heart picking up as soon as you see Donghyuck hobbling around behind the glass. A grin’s curled on his lips as the customers look at him in wonder. You heard a lot of the interchanging ones always wonder aloud how he could be so damn charming, how his smile is the work of miracles, how his eyes shine like the stars in the skies above, and above all else, just how damn talented he is. And you want to grit your teeth, bite your tongue of all the declinations that could put these compliments to shame, but unwittingly, you’ve found yourself agreeing with these exclamations in the smallest of ways without so much as batting an eyelash and you hate how it proves everyone else’s theories correct and how you’ve broken your own proclamation that Lee Donghyuck would be the last person you ever acquire feelings for and yet here you are, with feelings and Mark’s dark brown eyes eying you with traces of irritatingly blatant smugness. “It isn’t like he’d like me back anyway.”

The words come off more bitter than you would’ve liked, but it’s the truth. The blatantly cliché truth that makes it all the more disheartening to yourself, because you hate being so affected over something so small. It’s actually quite off-putting when Mark even lets loose a brief laugh, raising a brow at you.

“What?”

“You’re joking right?” he asks, tilting his head now.

You don’t like the hope that bubbles up, but you can’t help but play a little dumb and ask, “Do you know something I don’t…?”

Mark relinquishes a rather loud laugh, immediately throwing you off. You swear he’s been hanging out with Donghyuck far too much, because the octave and the volume are becoming far too similar. But you don’t have enough time to voice this suggestion when he casually says, “He likes you too.”

That’s when you find yourself laughing, nothing short of a breathy exhale that lasts no more than a moment but regardless, the very prospect has you recoiling. You don’t deny imagining the possibility of dating him, of him actually liking you back, and of a fantastical relationship between the two of you blooming and flourishing in plentiful ways. But that’s it. The whole thing is fantasy, a dream when one has an indisputable crush on a person they know they shouldn’t and won’t ever have past an oddball rivalry—perhaps a bare minimum of a platonic relationship, really.

“It’s true.”

You half-expected Mark to reiterate this, but it doesn’t stop you from shaking your head. Beyond the doubts and all the rejections that play over in your head, you know there’s nothing worse than getting your hopes up. It’s stilly to even like Donghyuck at all, but here you are doing exactly that. You know you shouldn’t fan the flames and you sure as hell know that you should just let the conversation die down with a sarcastic “Right” before scurrying off to other customers. You should just walk away now instead of letting your own whims and your own heart make the decisions on this matter. And yet, you can’t help but raise a brow at him, eyes narrowed, “And how do you know this?”

You expect the usual, “It’s just a hunch,” as everyone almost always supplements to you every time they voice this same hypothesis. However, you find the evenness and nonchalance of Mark’s tone all too regretful—

“Because he told me.”

Your mind immediately swims in a pool of thoughts. All of which are trying to make sense of this new information and its validity or lack thereof, but you don’t have a chance to ask. Before you can question him, you feel your pant leg vibrate. Possibly Yuta or Taeyong in need of some extra hands.

Craning your head toward the open doors, you see Jaehyun and Doyoung actually traipsing around before you turn to look at Mark with upturned brows. He waves you off, cheeks prominent as ever, with far too much knowledge behind his coffee brown hues. As if to say, “It’s fine, go do your thing.”

So, the best thing you offer is a simple: “You have some explaining to do later then.”

—

However, later does not come that day.

Each hour seemed to melt into the next until it was a new day and still nothing to appease the influx of thoughts that had pushed themselves to the forefronts of your mind. Even now at 3 PM and only about an hour and a half until your shift was supposed to end, you still can’t help but cling to the hope that the day can progress faster so you can see that idiot and get the answers you’ve been seeking.

“Mark’s not here?” Jaehyun asks you, raising a brow from the general vicinity. He came about an hour after your shift began and a few hours have passed since 10 AM, drawing your attention toward the expanse of the open front though not far enough to draw your line of sight back to the pastel building.

Dark mahogany wood make up the floor, while high cement-colored walls invited the light seeping in from the large windows adorning the front and the right side of the building. On the left side were a bunch of hanging plants and sets of polaroid photos of customers and employees, some kissed by the viridescent foliage while some of the strings still had room for more. Beside that were the furniture that came all in black steel, high tables with high chairs, though they still couldn’t reach the ceiling lights which were simply hanging light bulbs. There’s even standing tables and charging corners for to accommodate for the nomadic customers.

After all, the constant influx of customers jostling in and out is nothing out of the ordinary, even the ring of the door-top bell is nothing short of white noise to the low hum of chatter collected within the walls. Faces that pass range between daily familiarity to blatant estrangement, friendly and not-so-much, hold no candle to the particular contours of a certain blond-haired boy, who had long since left after you departed him to do a few extra tasks for Taeyong and even the text messages you sent his way had gone unanswered.

Of course, it’s off-putting to see that all of your inquiries have been pushed into today, leaving you with nothing but your damn imagination to run wild at the possibilities of how true it all is. Part of you wants the truth, yearns for it, really. But another part just wants the band-aid ripped off the wound so you can get over the feelings and stave them off until they’re nothing more than cold coals on a fire pit. Instead of dealing with the irksome blazes that’ve done only provoked your hopes and desires, you’re convinced that by having that conversation with Mark then you’ll have that closure you seek, so it makes you sigh at the mention.

“He’s at Dreamie’s today,” you answer, taking a chance by glancing over at the large window again. Past the veranda is the other store’s veranda, dots of people occupying the spaces there as the employees did their best to please everyone. You expect to catch the mop of blond you’ve been so used to seeing every other day, but you don’t fully glance around enough because there’s comes a flash of auburn that has your heart stuttering too quickly after the flash of purple that came beforehand.

Of course, this only encourages your co-worker to raise a brow at you, eyes set with flickers of curiosity and an unnerving knowledge (much like Mark’s). Jaehyun’s always been a little tamer than Yuta with the suggestive jests, but you still can’t help but feel like he knows as much as Mark does and it bugs you to know that everyone else knows more about your situation than you do yourself.

“You okay?”

You nod, tearing your gaze from his out of your own self-preservation.

Admitting your feelings now would be easy, like ripping off a band-aid but for your friends, but it would also mean proving everyone else right. But you know that in doing so you would be putting yourself at risk of an onslaught of encouraging coaxing to confess and you’re not quite sure you need that at the moment. It’s one thing to tell your friends about a crush, but it’s another to tell your actual crush (read: work rival) about it.

You’ve imagined how the event would go down plenty of times. Your own imagination nothing short of what you know would happen. There’s very likely prospect of getting laughed at or even just teased by someone who was already surpassing you at your own thing. Of which felt more like a double wound to your pride.

You told yourself from the beginning that he would be the last person you have feelings for. From the few passing conversations you had, there was nothing in the words that would’ve suggested anything either, unless you counted sassy quips and back-and-forth’s that would sometimes drive your mutual friends into the ground in fits of laughter. And to feel an ounce of something more than bare amusement is odd and foreign, but it feels too good to talk yourself out of any of it.

It proves everyone else right, and you hate that it was like you missed out on all of the obvious sign, that now that you’ve fallen into everyone else’s expectations that the expectation that you have to confess will be your own downfall. After all, why would Donghyuck like you back?

So, you ask, carefully, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

He shrugs and leans against the counter. Although you want to pretend that there’s nothing wrong and that you have customers to attend to, there’s nothing the moment your gaze flits to the main lobby.

Customers sit at the tall mahogany tables, chattering with white porcelain cups in hand and the steel utensils for those who ordered some of the buttery pastries in your artillery. They appear happy and unbothered by minor strifes, completely oblivious to any form of conundrum going on in the confines of your mind and body, which, of course, you expected but it still makes you yearn to be like them. Or, at the least, distracted by them. Instead, they’re all content without your assistance even as you wish it was the exact opposite.

“So, I’m guessing Mark finally talked to you about Hyuck?”

The term of endearment breaks your gaze away from the window, a part of you thanking Jaehyun but another part of you suspicious now. You don’t even stop yourself as you ask, “How did you—?”

“—Relax, we’ve just been nagging him to,” he replies, showcasing a dimpled grin that you probably would’ve found adorable on any other day. Unfortunately, this was not the one. He knows far too much and you’re not sure if it’s because of your own actions or Mark’s big mouth; either way, you feel nervous. “Plus, it’s obvious. You and Hyuck.”

“Me and Donghyuck…” You frown a little as he nods, thus able to dispel your own nerves. “We’re not anything. He doesn’t even like me like that.”

It’s supposed to be a normal response, an ordinary one, an unexpected one. And yet, the way it falls off your lips and tumbles out into the bustling air, it’s nothing short of off and unnatural. You immediately regret it as soon as you feel your stomach flip.

“Are you sure about that?” he asks, eyes gone a little wide. “Wait, did you talk to Hyuck already?”

“No.” You shake your head, giving the shop another once over in case you catch sight of that punk you call a friend. Again, you’re left empty-handed. But it doesn’t stop your gaze from drifting to the head of auburn that is now scurrying around his building’s veranda, with a smile adorning his sun-kissed face and eyes shining even from the three-meter distance. “I’m just saying it isn’t likely. Well… at least ‘till yesterday when Mark said he did.”

When your gaze returns back to Jaehyun, barely missing the way he lets out a deep sigh of what you could classify as relief, he takes that as his chance to offer: “Well, you can try after work? Maybe you’ll catch him then.”

You suppose he’s right, biting your bottom lip as you consider finding your friend and getting those answers you’ve been seeking. Although a part of you actually wonders if Jaehyun means talking to Mark or Donghyuck. Another part wonders if you’re just hoping that he means the latter.

There’s just a particular gleam of impishness that makes you lean on the latter, but you can’t even ask if there’s more to what he’s getting on because his pager vibrates right then. An apologetic look washes over his face as he mouths an actual apology before stepping away from the counter. He gives the top of your head a ruffle, probably going off to see what Taeyong needs help with since neither Yuta or Doyoung are in just yet. To which you’re grateful for, because if they heard the conversation that just transpired, they’d be on your ass about all of it.

And soon enough, an influx of customers hitting the 2 PM slump come bustling in, hushing away all the thoughts as orders and designs become your top priority.

—

The day has fallen into the half-past four sunset, dusting the once light sky skies with streams of muted shades of tawny and terracotta. A bare chill now breezing across the stilling city streets and even the white noise of the customers has been muted out by Jhené Aiko’s “While We’re Young” for the ambiance.

You’re seated at an empty table on the veranda, closest to the open gates with the prospects of getting your resolution. Then, of course, going home and into bed, because this day has become much harder than you anticipated. All you’ve had on your mind is Lee Donghyuck. And to you, that’s uncharacteristic, it’s silly. You dislike this aspect of having a crush, because you don’t want to be so distracted by someone. It felt easier before you had a crush on him when all you thought about was how to one-up him and get more praise, get those Snapchat story photos and Instagram photos, and get the satisfaction and the thrill of knowing that this was merely a friendly competition and you were winning it.

Though instead of looking for Mark as you originally planned, you remain where you are as you listen to your customers on the veranda chatting incessantly about the new designs you concocted for them. They love it. They even love the small little pick-up lines you’ve scribbled onto some of the napkins, and it’s all the more gratifying when there’s a few quick pops of flashes of the set-up.

It all reminds you of a simpler time.

Meeting him as nothing more than an entity more notably referred to as Mark’s friend, only to pique interest at Mark’s drop of the fact that you specialized in flat whites. The sudden attention both confused and interested you because you had never met someone so bent on competing with practically a stranger. Then, came the teasing that you had no problem offering in return, because it’s a natural reflex. This only seemed to encourage Donghyuck, making it all too normal for the two of you to exchange and repertoire only you two could decipher at times. Slipped in between the seams came this unofficial competition for Mark, the two of you trying to convince the blond to come to 127’s or Dreamie’s whenever you could just because it would get on the other’s nerves when they weren’t chosen. Somehow you both couldn’t stop sending your mutual friend scribbled on napkins with doodles and pick-up lines—anything to keep him coming until Mark ultimately decided to remain the middleman. Each piece commemorated by with a photo posted to Instagram just for the other’s viewing pleasure, and perhaps that is where everything stops being so simple. Of course, it happened so unwittingly and so minutely, it blurs afterwards until you noticed the influx of attention coming from Dreamie’s and their adorable flat whites. Then, it just became clearer. The rivalry became more potent. And all you could really want out of each day you two worked simultaneously was winning over him.

Because so suddenly his eyes gleamed with more than just devilment, his smile less irksome, and even his own designs have become more and more commendable. All those small details you once noticed in passing have pushed forth and become everything you think whenever you see him. Like how his nose scrunches just a little when he laughs at something you’ve said or how he blinks instead of winks when he’s trying to provoke you from across the street. Even his laugh, a sound you swore was nothing more than siren in the tranquility of your vicinity is now one you can hear jovially.

In short, Lee Donghyuck has snuck up on you. Not only as a fellow competitor, but as the reason you look forward to coming to work, as the reason why you try to make your jokes even wittier and your designers even better, and as the reason you feel more than just a racing heart and a bundle nerves. He makes you feel, and it’s the first time in a very long time that you can admit to yourself right now. And it’s for all these reasons that you’re not all that sure what to do with any of the information, whether he likes you back or not, or if this is just a passing phase that’ll pass, you don’t care or mind.

All you know is that you like Lee Donghyuck, and as much as you hate admitting it, you do hope he likes you back.

Letting out a deep sigh, you send Mark a text that you’ll be waiting in front of the gate before rising from your spot and moving to the one about a yard from the straight-lettered plaque that reads the store’s name. With no one is congregating on the sidewalk, it gives you enough room to tie your shoelaces and idle around as you wait for a response until the sound of your name pierces the air.

Clear and smooth from the speaker as nothing, not even the passing cars from the adjacent street break into the syllables. It’s paired with the small taps that come to a halt about two feet from you, but the very voice makes you unable to pull your head up because you’re hoping it isn’t who you think it is.

“And here I thought we had a good thing going,” you hear Donghyuck say, effectively snatching your attention from the laces. You feel your heart somersault in synchronization with your stomach, because there he is. The damn devil himself. All dressed to an expected combination of a flannel and a pair of jeans in place of the black slacks and button-down, and still quite handsome nonetheless.

Your brows immediately knit together as his words register and you reply, “Are you okay or have you been breathing in too much froth?”

“I am definitely not okay considering you cheated on this Mark agreement,” Donghyuck huffs, watching as you give the laces a final tug. His gaze remains trained on you as you rise to full height, though you still dwarf him.

“He wasn’t with me,” you shake your head, brows furrowing even more now. “I was here waiting for him.”

He doesn’t say anything right away, rather his hickory hues wash over your visage in the softest way. You don’t think you’ve seen it since the last time you hung out with Mark and the other workers of the Neo franchise about a month ago. But that time came after Yuta and Doyoung cornered you and Donghyuck together. You can’t remember what they said exactly but they kept trying to talk the two of you into finally admitting your love for each other, and all you could respond with were insults and snarky quips just to get them off your back. He went with it at the least.

“Oh,” he says, quite plainly. Very uncharacteristic of him. “Um, well… what kinda bone do you have to pick with him anyway? I’ll defend his honor.”

You crack a half-smile, enjoying the way the street lamps wash over his feature and cast a warm light over him.

His eyes light up just a bit, making him raise a brow at you in expectancy.

“It’s about you, superstar.”

He blinks immediately, “Me?”

You nod, deciding that maybe it is now or never, and if you won’t get answers from Mark then could it really hurt to ask the source himself?

“He told me something interesting about you,” you pause, gathering your courage and strengthening the resolve. Even with the light fading, you can’t help but feel ease as you remain standing before him.

Many times you’ve experienced crushes, you’ve had heartbreak, and they’re different and all in their tiers. Liking someone has always been one of your favorite things, because you get see a person for who they are, especially in such a close-knit environment like being co-workers. You have a formulaic way of confessing, the sort that has you blurting it all out in one go because it’s better to just rip off the band-aid and take the consequences. Although your previous hesitations have done nothing to assuage the anxieties, you take a deep breath. “He said you have a crush on me.”

“Yeah?” he says, a timidness coating the question in a way that makes you wonder what is going on through his mind. “What’d you say?”

“Yeah,” you reply, voice suddenly wavering. “I—well, I didn’t have a chance to really respond. I was surprised. I figured he was lying or joking or whatever.”

He doesn’t say anything in response. His bottom lip is pulled between his teeth and his gaze has flitted to the plaque beside you, and his gaze tracing the metallic lettering than meeting your inquisitive eyes.

“Was he?” you try once more, tilting your head just a little in hopes of catching his eye.

He gulps, releasing his lip to relinquish a sigh.

“Donghyuck?”

His eyes snap to yours as soon as he releases his own soft sigh, “Remind me never to tell that blabber mouth secrets, yeah?”

You have your answer. Right there. But instead of responding or even nodding, you let him continue, “He wasn’t—it’s true.”

“Seriously?” you ask, almost tempted to reach over and pinch your forearm for fear that maybe this is one of those cruel dreams that’ve been plaguing your subconscious every so often. But you know he means it when he nods, meeting your eyes in a solemn enough way for you to understand he does mean it, that Mark really wasn’t joking, and that has your heart thundering even louder than you thought it could. “W-why?”

He laughs, a genuine sound that urges a small smile out of you.

“What?”

“Why?” he asks as the corners of his lips curl into a smile. “Y/N, why not?”

“That doesn’t answer my question,” you retort, tempted to roll your eyes at him. Although you’re a completely wrecked mess right now, you can’t help but feel so normal with him. The very atmosphere of the conversation is much like any other that you’ve had, minus the previous hiccup but that alone reminds you of the party. It felt like there was a lot that could’ve been said between you two, and yet the pressure of everyone else made it hard. “Seriously, why?”

Instead of answering your question, he replies with his own, “Well, do you like me back?”

You scoff, “I asked you first.”

“And I asked you second,” he says with a shrug even as you shoot him a small eye roll. “Do you or don’t you?”

You open your mouth, readying a response but all you can do is clamp your mouth shut and feel the blood from your body linger on the apples of your cheeks. Goddammit…

He tries after a moment of your self-imposed silence, “Y/N?”

You nod, looking away from his eyes, “I do.”

He blinks, “What?”

“I do,” you repeat, slightly louder than your soft murmur.

He leans in closer, now only a foot away, “What was that? I didn’t hear you.”

“I do,” you say, feeling your own cheeks getting warmer. But you remain where you are.

“You do what?” he asks, gaze softening on you.

You let out a deep sigh as your own body courses with newfound courage; then, you say, “I like you, Donghyuck.”

“Wha—” Your eyes narrow, as if to tell him, “don’t push it,” earning yet another beautiful laugh from him. “You know… I like you for a lot of reasons, and that’s one of them.”

“You like me being mean to you?” Your brows screw together, even your hand is ready to lay atop his forehead for fear that he might be delirious with a fever but before you can, he stops you. His cheeks getting a little pink even with the peachy light on his visage as you don’t even bother pulling your hand away.

“Because you’re yourself with me, I like that. You don’t shy away from saying what’s on your mind and I—well, I like being around you,” he explains, letting your hands fall in between the twelve-inch, though they still have yet to slip from each other’s grasps. You like how it feels in yours. “And I guess I have a funny way of showing all those feelings, but I hoped it would catch your attention.”

Your nose scrunches for a moment before a smile adorns your visage in a way that matches his, swelling your heart and earning yet another soft sigh to pass your lips.

“It worked, alright?” You admit to him, “And I’m so glad I wasn’t the only one who caught feelings. I feel like my heart might burst out of my chest.”

He nods vigorously and releases a deep breath, “Me too! I dunno if I should thank Mark or kick his butt for spilling my secret though.”

“Let’s do it together then. It’s what he gets for giving me a heart attack,” you grin, giving his hand a squeeze. “And while we’re at it, how about a date afterwards?”

“Perfect,” he smiles as you both turn toward the bus stop at the end of the street. “How does boba sound?”

“Like my cup of tea,” you reply with a small, breathy laugh. He playfully rolls his eyes at you, but he remains at your side. The two of you are happier than ever.

Perhaps now you two can call this war a draw.

—

“Will you show me how to do that soccer ball with Pochacco?” you ask, only lurching forward as the bus roars to life and carries the two of you back to the university.

He taps his chin for a moment, gaze falling away from your own as you wait expectantly.

“Well you show me how to do the perfect flat white?”

You tilt your head at him, “Perfect? How am I gonna do that? You’re pretty good already.”

“Okay, but,” he pauses, “yours are perfect. Can you show me how to do that?”

“I suppose I can try…” you reply, only meeting his hickory eyes for a moment before you look elsewhere. “It might take some time though.”

“I don’t mind. It’s time spent well with you,” he admits, smiling as you do. He can’t seem to get enough of the flush that falls upon your cheeks, happier than ever when you look away indignantly.

“You’re too much,” you sigh, nodding regardless. “But yeah, let’s do that sometime. Maybe then you won’t make any more of those atrocious Flat Lines.”

He clutches his chest, exaggerating a gasp as you try to remain as impassive to the gesture though it works only by a bare minimum. “I am hurt.”

“It’s the truth,” you say, lifting your shoulders slightly.

“I bet I can make a perfect one after one lesson.”

“Oh really?” You raise a brow at him, noting the way he fights against his own self-preservation just to prove you wrong.

He nods, though the courage on his features don’t meet his words, “Y-yeah! And you gotta make a perfect Pochacco soccer ball after one lesson too.”

“Alright,” you smirk, fully knowing that you might lose but seeing the determination etched on his features is enough to keep you agreeing. You can’t help but adore his sheer tenacity. “It’s on.”

Maybe the war isn’t quite over yet after all… not that you mind it anyway.

#lee donghyuck scenarios #donghyuck scenarios #donghyuck au #donghyuck fanfic #donghyuck fluff #nct dream scenarios #nct scenarios #nct 127 scenarios #nct fanfic #donghyuck x reader #emswriting #october prompts 2017

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lydiastormborn · 7 years

Text

title: a blast from the past

ship: jaykyle

summary: jason gets kyle's friends to talk about his early days as a green lantern. It ends up being really embarrassing. kyle retaliates by roping jason's siblings into calling out his past costume choices.

as they say, all is fair in love and dragging your significant other down.

a/n: @ anon who encouraged me to write this: thanks have fun with this meta shitpost callout fic

[on ao3]

After all this time, Kyle should know Jason better than that. He should have expected something like this.

His first indication is the fact the apartment isn’t quiet when he gets back; by all means, Jason should be already out on a patrol. Then Kyle notices an impressive collection of shoes and jackets in the hallway, which are definitely not his or Jason’s, and he slowly creeps into the brightly lit living room.

Guy is the first one to take note of him. “Hey, talk of the devil! Look who finally came.”

Kyle squints at the faces that turn into his direction, trying to make sense of what he’s seeing. Guy and John look way too comfortable sitting in a couple of armchairs Kyle is pretty sure Jason got from a garage sale; Jason himself is seated on a couch between Connor and Donna, on whose left there’s Roy.

Kyle doesn’t have a good feeling about this, but he tries to play along anyway. He quirks an eyebrow.

“Is it my birthday today or something?” he jokes, glancing at a table full of various snacks and beverages. Jason can be a surprisingly good host if he wants to.

Jason gives him a toothy grin that worries Kyle. “You wish,” he says. “It’s just, you know how you always tell me I should try to make nice with your friends?”

“Actually, I mentioned that maybe once --”

“So this is me. Making nice. Having a little chat,” Jason explains, stretching his legs under the table.

“Really,” Kyle says flatly, not buying it. “Strange how you failed to mention it’s happening tonight. Also, you’ve literally known Donna and Roy longer than I have.” When Jason just shrugs, completely unbothered, Kyle sighs and makes himself a puffy, comfortable armchair; their apartment is rather sparse when it comes to furniture. They rarely have so many guests at once.

“I suppose Wally isn’t coming?” Connor asks then and Kyle almost falls off his seat.

Jason cocks his head. “Oh, West? I called, but he’s pretty busy tonight. Said maybe he’ll drop by, but it’s unlikely.”

Roy laughs. “You should be happy. All this food would be already gone.”

“Yeah, probably.” Jason looks back to Kyle and he’s smirking again. It’s starting to become unnerving. “He told me some interesting things, though.”

“So, what are you guys talking about, again?” Kyle tries, feeling awfully out of loop.

“Jason wanted to hear some stories from your early days as GL,” John tells him mildly.

This is… not really what Kyle expected. He’s confused.

“Specifically, he asked for embarrassing stories,” Guy clarifies with a shit-eating grin.

“Like, I knew you were a loser from the moment I met you, but the things I’ve heard today, wow.” Jason shakes his head. “There’s so much I didn’t know.”

Oh. Okay, this isn’t looking stellar, Kyle supposes.

“Yeah, before you came I was talking about what an irresponsible greenhorn you were during your short tenure with Titans,” Roy says and snorts. “Coming on time? Taking training seriously? These were strange concepts to you.”

“Well, and you had a dumb costume back then,” Kyle says before he can think better of it.

Roy crosses his arms over his chest. “Oh, getting cheeky, Rayner? This much haven’t really changed.”

“He did have some problems with authority and keeping quiet when he should, didn’t he?” Jason asks, turning to Connor.

“Well, that’s true,” Connor says because he’s honest like that. “Kyle was… rather a hothead. So much that he re-defined who’s the impulsive one in Green Arrow and Green Lantern’s team ups.”

“Come on, I wasn’t that bad,” Kyle protests on a principle.

Connor looks at him like he’s grown a second head. “And that time we went looking for you father? That was a fiasco on many fronts, if not all.”

Kyle winces at the mention of that; it kind of really was.

“Including when you tried to show me how to flirt, I’d say. It almost got us arrested.”

Oh, no. He remembers that, too.

Jason looks intrigued. “Care to tell that story?”

“There was this waitress. Christie, I think,” Connor starts, easily ignoring Kyle’s throat slash gesture. “When she brought our orders, Kyle took his shake from her and held her hands in his to warm them up.” Guy snorts into his cup. “He said something about never listening much to what other people have to say, but that he’d be willing to give her a chance to… convince him.” Roy is outright giggling now. “They were interrupted by her father who was from the police, though. That’s how we ended up getting into a fight with police officers.” Connor tilts his head to the side and sighs. “I admit, I had no romantic experience back then, but I found this display somewhat strange and uncomfortable to watch.”

“Someone’s flirting skills just got dragged,” Roy comments over the laughs and Kyle knows his face is red.

“For the most part, whenever Kyle, Wally and I would go out somewhere, and there would be women, it usually ended up backfiring at us somehow,” Connor adds.

“Oh, come on, you literally didn’t have to do anything and they were all over you, anyway!” Kyle exclaims.

Donna’s eyebrows raise. “That’s petty, Kyle. Jealousy doesn’t suit you.”

“Honestly, though, can you blame him for thinking with his dick sometimes?” Guy asks blatantly.

“You’re so not helping my case right now,” Kyle tells him, pinching the bridge of his nose. He turns to John who remained quiet through the antics. “John, back me up. I wasn’t that bad, right?”

John, looking slightly amused, says, “You know I have nothing bad to say about the work you did as Green Lantern then, Kyle.” And as Kyle lets himself feel a twinge of hope, John continues, “I do remember the first time we met out of costumes, though.”

Right. Kyle can’t have nice things.

“Ah, I remember that as well,” Donna says with an acute grin. Kyle turns to her with a pleading expression; at one hand, he’s glad they’re past their, well, past and can bring up things from that time, but he’d prefer if she didn’t do it right now. “Your neighbor Allison seemed quite keen on posing for you in nude, didn’t she?”

Guy dramatically gasps and Roy chokes on his drink. Jason looks affronted. “Seriously, Kyle?” he asks, disbelief clear in his voice. “Doing something like that while you were in a relationship? With Donna, out of all people?”

“It was just an artistic exercise!” Kyle stresses even though this excuse sounds as weak as it had back then, if not weaker.

“And then you said something like, ‘Well, I’d feel better about finding you with some attractive naked guy if you had a sketch pad in your hands’,” Donna adds, doing quite a good impression of Kyle’s voice.

He sometimes regrets his friends have such good memory just as much as he regrets the things that came out of his mouth.

“Okay, this happened, I can’t deny,” he says eventually, running a hand through his hair. “And thinking back to it, I realize it looked bad…”

“Just like that time I came to find Jade hanging off of you as your new flatmate?” Donna asks, not pulling her punches.

Kyle doesn’t even know how to counter that. It’s good Donna missed that part where he found Jenny under his shower and later had a fight with her brother over a misunderstanding concerning her underwear.

He winces internally. These things really make him look bad, now that he looks back to them.

“Wow,” Jason says, tapping fingers against his thigh. “I really would have felt an urge to kick your fuckboy ass if I knew you back then, wouldn’t I?”

Roy laughs. “Yeah, I have a feeling you two wouldn’t like each other very much.”

“Luckily for us, Kyle grew up since then,” Donna says with a small smile. Kyle takes it for what it is; if Donna wanted to, she could have brought up more things from the time they dated.

“We all make mistakes,” Connor adds.

“Green Lanterns more than most of us, apparently” Jason comments dryly. To John and Guy, he says, “No offense.”

Both sullen and embarrassed, Kyle watches as their guests start leaving, pointedly ignoring their jabs and goodbyes. Jason gets to cleaning up the table; it seems like he’s in far too good spirits as for someone who just found out about a lot of cringeworthy shit his boyfriend used to do. It annoys Kyle.

“Are you going to sit in your fake armchair and sulk all night?” Jason asks finally, standing in front of Kyle with his hands on his hips.

“You did this because I forgot to clean the bathroom this week, right?” Kyle asks instead, after turning it over in his head.

If anything, Jason looks even more amused. “Try again,” he tells him.

“Was it because I crashed your patrol with Robin and Lark the other night? I swear I didn’t actually mean it this time.” Jason shakes his head. “Okay, so… because I painted memes on your back when you were drunk last week and then shared it on snapchat?” Kyle risks asking.

Jason blinks. “You did that?” He looks thoughtful for a moment. “Well, I guess it explains the texts I got the next day.”

“Come on, I’m running out of ideas here,” Kyle says. “Like, it can’t be because I accidentally mentioned to Alfred I found your secret cigarette stash?” Kyle narrows his eyes when Jason remains quiet. “Oh my God, it’s that?”

“Ding-ding, someone hit a jackpot,” Jason announces in a deadpan voice.

Kyle throws his hands up. “It was over a month ago!”

“Didn’t you know? I can hold a grudge. Ask Bruce. And besides,” Jason adds, jabbing a finger at him, “since I don’t smoke anymore, it’s not a secret stash, it’s an emergency stash and you outed me like that, to Alfred, no less. Geez, Kyle, thanks for nothing.”

“I literally can’t believe you,” Kyle tells Jason as he starts walking towards the bedroom.

“Right back at you, mister ‘there are guys who make embarrassed to have a Y-chromosome, but I’m not like those jerks’,” Jason calls back without even turning around.

It takes Kyle a moment to place this particular blast from the past. Once he does, he facepalms. “Damn, Donna,” he mutters under his breath.

And because he’s a responsible adult, Kyle, still sitting in his comfy, not-real armchair, starts plotting his revenge.

…

When Jason steps into the living room at the Manor, he does a double take and feels a strong urge to leave immediately.

The long table from the dining room was moved in at some point, so Kyle, Tim, Dick and Damian, sitting behind it now, look more like a jury than anything else. On one of the sofas, propped up on some cushions, there’s Cassandra, reclining like a cat, and she waves at Jason with a grin upon spotting him. He narrows his eyes at her and turns his attention back to the table.

“Well, this looks like a staged intervention,” he comments dryly, leaning on the doorframe. “I have no idea for what reason, though.”

“Close, but that’s not it,” Dick answers airly. “It’s a bit late for an intervention, in all honesty.”

“But it’s not too late for a… discussion,” Kyle adds and Jason has a hunch what “discussion” means in this case. “About some of your rather misguided costume choices.”

Jason blinks at them once, twice, then starts laughing. “Hey, seriously? This is how you want to get back at me? Couldn’t you come up with something better? I mean, you realize who you’re sitting with, right?” Jason gestures to Dick who, to his credit, doesn’t even move, except for a tiny twitch of a muscle in his jaw. “I’d say this merry company will make this whole show lose some of its credibility.”

“Stop using Grayson’s dark fashion past as means of distraction, Todd,” Damian says, straightening in his seat. He still looks relatively small compared to the others. “We’re here to discuss yours.”

“Okay, well then, squirt. Hit me up with what you’ve got,” Jason states cheerfully, walking into the room and taking a seat in one of the vacant chairs. “I mean, it’s not like you’re gonna drag me for the Robin suit, are you? Not my fault Tim was the first one to actually show some, you know, common sense and campaign for actual pants.”

“Yeah, that was wise,” Tim agrees thoughtfully. “But that wouldn’t be fair indeed. The costumes that came after, though, they were all up to you, weren’t they?”

“I guess,” Jason answers, careful now.

“Great,” Dick agrees and opens -- is that a folder? “Remember when you came back to Gotham to become a crime lord? Dressed like that, no less.” He flashes a picture.

Jason smiles a little, almost nostalgic. “Ah, right. Those were the times.” Then, he glowers at them. “Hey, but I will have you guys know this was a look, okay? Minimalistic, sure, with a black leather jacket, but still.”

“Ignoring the fact it doesn’t look like it did much as a protection factor,” Damian comments, glancing at the photo, “I suppose this… outfit was the least heinous out of the ones you wore back in time.” The others nod.

“Hey, what’s that supposed --” Jason starts, but Tim cuts him off.

“Anyway, are we going to talk about that time when Jason was posing as Nightwing in New York? We don’t have pictures, but --”

“No,” Jason and Dick say in unison. Kyle’s eyebrows climb high on his forehead. Tim and Damian stare, visibly confused.

Jason makes an eye contact with Dick and is briefly thankful this is something they both agree on.

Dick clears his throat. “It would do no good to bring that up,” he says, his expression somewhat pained. “Let’s just say that Jay looked okay… till a point, I guess,” he finishes lamely. Jason grits his teeth quietly.

“Okay, that was weird, but maybe I don’t want to know the details,” Tim states after a moment of prolonged silence and shuffles through some pictures. He pulls one. “Hey, remember your murder Batman outfit?”

Jason groans. “Well, now I do, unfortunately.”

“What kind of a cowl was that supposed to be?” Damian sneers. “Like a close helm. You did take the knight part to the heart, didn’t you?”

“Glowing eyes were such an overkill,” Dick muses.

“Well, okay, I can admit it was kind of bad.” Jason throws his hands up in the air. “But I didn’t trouble myself with fancy designs then, alright?”

“But you sometimes take time with your costumes,” Tim says, almost nonchalantly. “I mean, that time you came to Titans Tower to kick my ass?”

Jason feels his eyes go comically wide when he realizes what Tim is referring to. He leans out of his chair. “No, hang on, that didn’t happen like that --”

“Oh, but it did,” Tim interrupts and, sure enough, flashes another photo.

“Now, this is a photoshop or something --”

“No, it’s not, Donna confirmed that,” Dick says without missing a beat.

“Traitor,” Jason whispers and glares when Tim speaks up again.

“You know, I’ve always wondered, did you sew the costume yourself? Like, I know they sell adult-sized Robin uniforms...”

(“They do?” Damian perks up. “What for? Shouldn’t we charge money for that?”

Kyle coughs. “You’re probably too young to know.”)

“...but it didn’t really look like one of the manufactured ones.”

Jason closes his eyes for a moment and sighs internally. So this is how it feels like when your past comes back to haunt you. He’s almost sorry for doing that to Kyle the other day.

“If you must know,” he says finally, “I did sew it myself. The ones they sell are usually of such a shitty quality, it’d probably tear at a stitch before I even threw one punch.”

“I knew it,” Tim mutters triumphantly and isn’t that kid just plain weird.

“Well, that was kind of extra,” Dick states, scratching his chin. “Then again, it’s Jason we’re talking about, so…”

“Dickie, you wanna go?” Jason offers lightly.

Kyle snaps his fingers. “Well, I wasn’t around for most of these, but here’s a thing that tagged along from our multiverse trip.” He points at something which Jason thinks is a sketch.

Tim makes a displeased noise in the back of his throat. “I thought we agreed we’re not bringing in Red Robin,” he says, irritated. “I am wearing it now.”

“Yeah, but it kind of suits you, I guess?” Kyle tilts his head to the side. “I mean, except for the fact it looks like a rip-off of Dr. Mid-Nite.”

Jason snickers. “Still better than comparing the cowl to a dil--”

“Jason,” Dick says, a warning in his voice.

Tim’s expression is pinched. “Is that what you guys think of it? Really?”

“Well, then again, you can’t be exactly blamed for that,” Jason says, shrugging. “It’s another mantle you picked up after me. Like, haven’t you had an original idea in your life, kid?”

“To be fair, you weren’t the one who came up with it, either,” Kyle butts in before Tim has a chance to snap.

Dick looks pensive. “Actually, you’re the one who kept claiming already used identities, Jay. I mean, Robin, Nightwing, Red Robin, Batman? Even the Red Hood.”

Jason opens his mouth to argue, then closes it, and opens it again. Eventually, he grumbles, “Are you done having fun at my expense?”

“Never,” Damian replies with a smirk. In a dramatic move that probably runs in his blood, he selects another photo and throws it across the table. “We have this atrocity left.”

“Oh, yeah,” Dick agrees. “That was bad. Like, real bad.”

“As the Internet would say, cursed outfit,” Tim adds.

“You’re talking about the one I had when Dickie was running around as Batman?” Jason asks, running a mental check in his head. “It wasn’t that bad.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Kyle stares at him. “I mean, disrespecting white-red-black color scheme like that, Jason? It hurts my eyes to even look at the pictures.”

“That skull at the front… Was it supposed to give off, like, metal vibe or something? It kind of made you look emo,” Tim continues flatly.

“And the cape going with it was just tasteless,” Damian states. “Shouldn’t be there in the first place.”

“Plus, red guns, they were really tacky. And the worst of all, the helmet.” Dick massages his temple. “How the hell could you think it was a good idea? You criticize Tim’s cowl, but do you know how bad this looked like? It was hard to take you seriously, I swear.”

“Later I changed the helmets and ditched the cape,” Jason tries to defend himself.

“Well, yeah, thanks to that you went from absolutely terrible to still terrible.”

“Like, seriously, Jason, this is a whole lot of bad costume choices,” Tim says, gesturing to the pile of pictures all over the table. “What even did you do with these things?”

Jason shrugs. “Most of them I keep in a storage I have in East End --”

“That’s what you keep there?” Kyle asks, shock audible in his voice.

“Among stuff like weapons, yeah.” Jason looks at him, frowning. “And what did you think I keep there?”

“I don’t know, another library of books? Old motorbikes? Not monstrosities like these.”

At that, Cassandra laughs. Truth be told, Jason forgot she was even in the room with them, with how quiet she kept through this… ordeal. He looks in her direction and freezes.

“Cass,” he says calmly, evenly. “Is that a camera?”

“Yes.” She pats the device propped up on one of the cushions. “Recorded for Stephanie and Barbara.”

Jason gets up from the chair. “Cass, give me that camera,” he says, still eerily calm. She grabs it, jumping over the backrest, one eyebrow raised in a challange. Jason adds, “Please.”

“Sorry, little brother, but no,” Cassandra answers and a moment later, she’s already across the room. Jason is fast, but not as fast as her; in the doorframe, he almost collides with Alfred.

“Master Jason,” the butler says, a hint of disapproval in his voice.

“Sorry, Alfie, but this is a matter of my dignity,” Jason explains hurriedly, trying to pass him. Alfred only arches an eyebrow just like Cass had moments ago. There’s a slam of the door somewhere down the hallway.

“Not that I do not find this matter important, of course, but I believe, sooner or later, we must face consequences of our actions. Besides,” he adds, over the roaring of an engine coming from the outside, “I believe this is a sound Miss Cassandra driving away with Master Duke.”

Jason swears loudly and turns back to his boyfriend and brothers who are laughing shamelessly (even Damian, that little demon, can’t hold back a grin). He honestly hopes they all end up falling off their chairs on their sore asses.

“You better hope you get a call up to space, Rayner,” Jason says sweetly. “In case you forgot, we’re scheduled for our monthly sparring session day after tomorrow and you’re gonna get your ass handed to you six ways to Sunday. And you won’t like it, I assure you.”

…

(bonus.)

A few days later, battle dust has mostly settled and the morning finds Kyle in the kitchen, making pancakes. He’s humming a song and it takes him a moment to realize someone is standing behind him. He turns around, ring ready.

“Shit!” he exclaims, almost dropping the spatula. “Artemis? What are you doing here? How did you even get inside?”

“Magic, of course,” the Amazon says, like it’s obvious. Well, Kyle supposes it is. “Is the Little One here?” she asks with a strange, almost pained expression on her face.

“Yeah, in the shower.” Kyle frowns. “Did something happen? Should I get him?”

“No, by all means,” she replies immediately. He is confused until Artemis asks, “Do you know the location of his storage?”

Kyle stares at her for a moment and snorts. “I take it you’ve seen the video.”

“Pictures as well.” She clenches her jaw. “Some of these things need to be disposed of immediately. Bizarro and I will see to it.”

“But you won’t destroy like, everything, right?” Kyle asks, just to make sure; he’s already sold on the idea.

Artemis gives him a flat look, one that reminds Kyle that as much as he may like Jason’s teammates, he keeps his distance for a reason. He rattles off the address.

“Thank you. Your cooperation is appreciated,” Artemis says.

“This conversation never took place and I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Kyle responds easily and turns around to flip a pancake. He thinks he hears Artemis chuckle before she’s gone again.

Jason is gonna kill him for this, sure, but at least Kyle will go out doing the world a favor.

#jason todd #kyle rayner #jaykyle #dc #my fics #it's after 1am don't call me out for this. goodnight

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lovemesomesurveys · 8 years

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- How often do you dream?: I guess all the time, I just don’t remember them too often.

- Do you dream in black/white or in color or both?: In color. I think. I’m not entirely sure, actually?

- Do you have dejavous often?: Well, my days are all basically the same...

- What do you dream about?: It’s usually just random stuff.

- Do you ever dream about something then it happens?: It has happened.

- Do you like having your picture taken?: No. If I’m taking a picture, I prefer that I’m the one taking the picture of myself.

- Who did you last take a picture of?: Myself on Snapchat.

- Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?: My mom.

- On messenger?: My friend, Amanda.

- How many pillows are on your bed?: Three.

- Whats your best memory with friends?: Hmmm. Not sure.

- Worst memory with friends?: Not sure what the worst would be either.

- Ever bought a cd for just one song?: Back in the day. Glad I don’t have to do that anymore. I haven’t even bought a CD in years.

- Which movie can you watch and say the lines along with the actors?: There’s a few of those, actually. Mean Girls is one of them.

- Have you ever said lol in real life without thinking about it?: Not seriously, no. I have said it jokingly.

- How many people do you live with?: Three.

- Have you ever watched a movie and not understood it? If so which one?: Yeah. Most recently was the movie Nocturnal Animals. The ending just was kind of wtf, so I ended up Googling it, ha.

- What color is most of your clothes?: I’m not sure if there’s a color that significantly stands out in my wardrobe more than the others.

- If you could take back one thing you’ve done…what would it be and why: Just one thing? That would be hard.

- If you could have any magical power, what would you have?: Teleportation.

- Are you a night or morning person?: Neither anymore. I used to be such a night owl back in the day.

- Do you believe in love at first site?: No.

- Whats one of the funniest things someone has said/did in the past week?: Nothing in particular really stands out.

- What/Who can cheer you up no matter what?: There isn’t anyone like that anymore. My dog, Brandie, used to be the one with that ability before she passed away. :(

- What movie can you watch over and over and never get bored?: There’s a few of those. For example, I’ve seen Mean Girls, Bridesmaids, The Devil Wears Prada, The Parent Trap, I Love You, Man, He’s Just Not That Into You, Friends with Benefits, and No Strings Attached just to name a few many, many times.

- If you died tomorrow, who would you leave everything you own to? I don’t have much to give away that anyone would really want, but it’d be given to my family. What they don’t want should be donated.

- Who is the one person that you could stand spending a straight 24 hours with and not get the slightest bit annoyed with?: Uhhh. Not sure if there is anyone, truthfully.

- Let’s say your dad came in your room one day and told you that you had to get married in the next week but you can pick the person but you have to stay with them for the rest of your life no getting out of it, who would you pick?: Oh heck no.

- If you could be the lead role in any movie, what would it be?: Any role alongside Alexander Skarsgård.

- What do you understand least about the opposite sex?: People are confusing.

- When eating something are you more concerned with taste or nutrition?: For me it’s taste. I’m not the epitome of health.

- What has made you laugh so hard you have cried?: Uh, a lot of things.

- Do you think it matters if girls wear makeup?: No... wear it or not wear it, it’s up to you.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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lifeisaboxofcereal · 8 years

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No clue who this is addressed to, nor what the purpose of this is/will be, but feeling exasperated that nothing helps me feel better, how about I give venting via writing a shot.

Here’s the deal. I’ve been involved with this guy for about 5+ years. Lets call him owl. Its the first thing I looked at in my apartment trying to come up with a code name instead of publishing this guys name who any of you reading most likely already know his name via any of my fb posts in the last 5 years. I met him my freshman year at UD. Ballroom dance team. To this day I dont even know if I can explain what drew me to him. He was cocky and confident, cheeky, and cute. He danced. He was a Marine. He seemed so out of my league as a dorky, naive, super awkward freshman that didn’t know anything about college culture. I learned quick that a few dates does not mean we’re dating, and that he was a man of many many ladies. I learned quick that he did not really take my feelings into consideration but I would put them aside and accept any interactions or affections that were given. We had a connection and I had fun with him. I just wanted to go with it.

I went with it for all four years of college. Always waiting for when he’d finally be ready to commit. Or see how much I do for him. How I’m always there, good times and bad. Even when he really really pisses me off. Waiting for him to see that I was his best friend the way I saw that he was mine. Waiting for him to stop messing up with me, appreciate me, cherish me, want to show me off.

I’m gonna be honest, that never came. Not in college. I didnt date anyone else. I didnt get involved with anyone else more than a few months, and those involvements were usually the product of me and owl being in one of our phases where we were on the outs and he was not talking to me. but once we were good again sure enough I’d lose interest in whoever it was that I was entertaining in that time. I regret a lot of that. Not giving others real chances, because they actually deserved them and wanted them.

But with him it was always like a game, like a chase, never ending, suspenseful, thrilling, exciting, passionate, never a boring moment. Always keeping me guessing. I hated it but I loved it. He didn’t respect me, and he didnt respect my feelings, but still I stuck around. It’s only now that I’m seeing that I had slowly been losing respect for myself, so what incentive would he have for respecting me when I was being a hypocrite? Our dynamic was one of push and pull. There were the times he’d pull me in and never want to let me go, and then without warning he would push me away and leave me feeling abandoned and confused as to what I did to deserve it.

He hurt me a lot. Never physically. Never. Never forced himself on me, I never once was physically scared of him. But emotionally. Every year there was at least one incident. One big fight that seemed like the be all end all. That would leave me in my dorm crying with my roommate wondering how he could be so cold and harsh towards me after everything I’ve done and everything we’ve shared. Always wishing that he would miss me and realize everything and change. It was a clear cycle, and I’m not stupid, I was very cognizant of it, but idk, i liked it and i was still waiting. What I had with him was so different and special I couldnt let it, or him, go.

Last year, October, we had a big falling out. That was really the be all end all. I knew because, and as stupid as this is or sounds, in all of our fights we had never unfriended each other on facebook or done something as extreme or defining as that. We always left doors open. But with this, he burned all bridges. He made a facebook status about me. He wanted all of my things out of his place. He 100% snapped. It was over, he broke things off and our 4 years of being together but not really together, was over.

I spent the next 5 months in therapy and trying to keep busy with friends and classes and trying to find myself again. So much of my identity was dependent on him and associated with him. All of my memories included him. Even dance reminded me of him. I was so lost. And missed him so much but had motivation to work on myself and for once be comfortable and happy with being on my own. I remember one particular session with my therapist in which she told me that if I still have hope that we will reconcile one day, I need to completely let go of what we had. Put it to rest, let it go, mourn it, and leave it in the past, because there was too much to be fixed and too much wreckage to salvage anything. That if we were to ever reconcile it would have to be a completely clean slate. Free of the past transgressions. So that night I blocked him. I blocked his number, his facebook. his snapchat, everything. It was hard and scary but I did it in hopes that thats what I needed to do even if temporarily and symbolically leave our 4 years together in the past.

2 days later was Valentines day. I was supposed to go to a devils game with a friend and she cancelled last minute because she was sick. I reached out to everyone in my phone to try to find someone to go with me because I did not want to spend valentines day in bed thinking about him and missing him. Nobody could come to the game. I was offered a shift at work and almost took it but someone hopped on it before I could. So i was left with chinese food and netflix. I let myself cry and be upset, and feel the hurt remembering our past valentines days together. And then my mom came to my room and let me know that jake was coming to the house. shit i said his name. whatever. she let me know that he asked permission to come and clear the air, and that he would be there in 40 minutes.

He was there in 30, and we sat down, with my best friend as a third party, and we talked for 5 hours. About everything. Anything. All the grievances we had with each other. What we realized. What we regretted. And he told me that he loved me. That he needs me in his life, and said all of the things that I had waited 4 years for. I kept thinking about how right my therapist was, about letting go and letting them come to you, about starting fresh, about leaving the past in the past.

The months that followed were the epitome of a honeymoon phase. My god. we were finally doing things right. He was showing me off, appreciating me, never wanted to let me go, it was everything. I dont think I’ve ever been so happy. We were so in love with each other, so excited, couldn’t wait more than 2 weeks to visit each other again. We moved in together. We made an apartment a home together. We started new jobs and set goals. We motivated each other, supported each other, and wholeheartedly loved each other. I finally felt like I was in a functional and healthy relationship. I felt so loved every single day and I finally understood what people meant about that unbelievable feeling of being in love with someone who was just as in love with you. We did and learned so much together. We had setbacks, and tiffs here and there, but we worked through each one.

Theres a lot in between then and now, but I don’t think it’s worth getting into or explaining. All I can say is that I don’t know how we went from that, to this. Not speaking. Not looking at each other. An apartment that was once so full of love and laughter now only has silence and tension.

He has problems. And to be honest. I’ve always known that but never wanted to accept it. I have problems too because I am very compliant. The relationship became emotionally abusive. I am mentally abused. And he has left me hating myself when I dont even know who I am. I don’t regret staying with him. I don’t regret getting back with him last year. I dont regret anything. All i’ve done is love and give as much as I possibly can. Im not angry. More than anything, i’m disappointed.

I thought he was it. Actually. I know he is. If he were to get the help that he needed. But in a normal relationship, when there is an issue, you don’t feel that your partner becomes a completely different person. That’s not normal. And right now, I don’t know who he is. For the past 2 weeks I have been wishing I could just snap him out of it. Grab him by the shoulders and shake him. Show him a photo of us and see him come back to me. I have written heartfelt letter after heartfelt letter. Debating giving one to him in hopes of softening him up and coming out of this haze of anger and hatred hes in right now. But thats not normal. I shouldnt have to snap him out of anything. I shouldnt have to wish he’d come back. I shouldnt have to plead and beg for him to remember our good times to soften up. None of it is normal. He dissociates. And when i look at his eyes hes not there. I know this sounds dramatic but it’s true. It’s scary, it’s hurtful, it worries me, but it’s true. He completely detaches, and it’s as though he never knew me. As though we never shared a single experience together. And nothing I do can bring him out of that place. As I write this, I feel like I’m writing or remembering someone that died. And thats because essentially, that is how I feel. the man i spent the past year with loving and learning and GROWING died. He’s gone and I dont know why or where he is. And i’m left with this fraction of myself that doesn’t know how to cope with any of it.

He’s not good for me. Its not worth it. I deserve better. I’m going to be so much happier without him. These are all words that an infinite number of friends or loved ones can say to me but the fucked up part of all of it is that I don’t want better, I want him. I know that I will never be able to fully let him go. It’ll never be fully over. And i will always love him. I care about him more than I care about myself. Which is a big part of the problem.

I don’t know where to go from here. Or how to cope. I don’t know what to do. All i know is that I miss him with every fiber of my being. I can’t open my phone gallery because the last photos I took were with him and I can’t look at them. I made a new facebook to run away from it all. Nothing I do makes me feel better. Friends. Work. Gym. Margaritas. Movies. Its all a distraction from missing the person who made me smile ear to ear every morning, and exhale peacefully every night. Even now as I write this, hes walking around the apartment and its as though Im a ghost. He doesnt see me. Acknowledge me. Notice me. And while I used to see him and feel overwhelming love, I now just feel hated. Complete hatred. As though I ruined his life, when all I ever tried to do was make his life better.

So friends, that is my story. I don’t know how it’ll end but I can tell you for sure that I will never be able to hate him or be angry with him. And I will always love him. What comes next for me, I have no idea. I thought writing all of this out would maybe help me have some sort of epiphany but no epiphany came.Sometimes I wish I could have my mind wiped clean of all of this so I wouldnt have to deal with this pain. But I cant. So this is going to suck. For a long while. I’m going to be upset for a long while. I hope at the end of this I can find myself and be a version of myself that has value and pride. I want to be the Bren that loves herself, respects herself, values herself, and is proud of herself. The bren that marched on washington for womens rights in the world needs to march for her rights in her life. More than anything though, I hope he finds himself. I hope he does what he needs to do. I only ever wanted him to be happy. Even if it was at my expense.

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macaronswithmini-blog · 6 years

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Hey! I’m Mini and I’m holding a macaron! Revolutionary.

Turns out my last post was over two years ago! I bet you can tell I love being committed to things...

Not that anyone asked, but this is how I look now. A little bit more laid back, a lot more business to attend to. Two years ago, I was caught up in the constant complaints of undergrad life. Since then, I’ve graduated, started working and I’m on my way to start grad school in the Fall. I know it’s a cliché but life has been a rollercoaster. Personally and professionally!

- I’m moving to Boston for a year! Living in California for more than half my life, I never thought I’d move to the east coast, let alone to different cities on the east coast. North Carolina has been a sneaky little devil, it grew on me. Trust me, I never thought I would ever say that. It’s a different world here in NC, not too shabby but it’s time to move on to bigger and better things. The most north I’ve been is to New York (I’m basically a local now) so Boston is going to be a little different but you know what they say...different is good. I’m ready to get back to the city life and I can’t wait to turn in to a popsicle for 5+ months! If you’re reading this, give me recommendations and people to hang out with!

- This year has been one for the books, and it’s not even half over. The first friend in my extensive best friends list got hitched! I know we’re all technically at the “marriageable” age but but when one of your closest friends actually gets married, it’s crazy! But good crazy. I was in India for a week (it was so short, I’m so mad) but I brought back a boatload of memories. I saw some friends and parents after ten years and it’s amazing how everyone has changed so much yet are still the same people I love and miss. All the events were such a blast but one incident stayed with me. For anyone that knows me, knows I’m basically a robot/heartless/cold/etc. I mean, I’m not but I’m just not super expressive in my emotions. But on the wedding day, as the knot was being tied, I started to tear up. Maybe it was the thought that I was flying back that very night and I was going to miss my friends/India or maybe it was watching my childhood friend enter this new phase in her life and how unreal and beautiful it all was. I don’t know what it was but either way, I cried a little (before my friend standing next to me who was doing the exact same thing) said to stop or our crying faces would show up on the live stream. But all in all, it was great and I can’t wait for my other friends (and me, of course) to get married soon because #weddingseason is the best season. While I’m talking about things I can’t wait for, I can’t wait to move back to India. After I wrap up grad school, can someone whisk me away to the motherland forever please?

- I’m not huge in to the whole astrological scene but keeping up with memes about my star sign is always fun. I’m a Virgo! Apparently Virgos love staying healthy. I have always been on the health-conscious end of the spectrum (mostly thanks to my parents) but I love my desserts. My motto has always been “why have dinner when you can have dessert?” Nonetheless, I fought my love with sugar several times. For Lent last year (I’m not Christian but I love the concept of Lent), I gave up sugar for a month. It was brutal but I didn’t cheat at all and let me tell you, it worked wonders. So I’m trying to cut out sugar from my diet again this year. It’s a work in progress but let’s hope I stick with it as long as I can. Another thing that I’ve incorporated in my life is drinking water. Something so simple and so overstated yet so effective. For the past two weeks, I’ve been drinking approximately 80 ounces of H2O every day (if not more) and it’s like a whole new world. I can’t believe once upon a time, I’ve had days where I would barely drink a glass of water. Staying hydrated has honestly been the best decision ever and it wasn’t even a New Year’s resolution!

- My love/hate relationship with social media still continues. I’ve stopped using Snapchat for the most part and have moved on to Instagram. If you watch my stories, thank you for sticking around. I don’t tweet as much as I used to but I need it to stay updated about pop culture/politics. Facebook is there to remind me of people’s birthdays and to let my friends know I exist. So in an attempt to stay away from social media, I’ve been making myself get back into the habit of reading more books. And it’s wonderful. After years of burying myself in law books, it’s refreshing to read normal books. Books that I don’t have to read but I want to.

This post ended up being way longer than I intended it to be but two years is a long hiatus so I guess it’s justified. If you actually made it to the end, kudos to you and keep coming back to read more posts, or don’t, totally your call. Have a good rest of the week!

xoxo Mini

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austinattack · 7 years

Note

do all the questions

is this a fuckin joke? under the cut, damn.

1.How many concerts have you been to?

i can not count, if you’re really interested in who exactly ive seen i have a page on my tumblr called shows

2. Have you been to any festivals?

warped tour is the only actual festival cuz fuck that and fuck warped tour lol

3. Which artist/band have you seen the most live?

i’ve seen Silverstein 11 times :’)

4. First concert you went to?

Hilary Fucking Duff

5. Last concert you went to?

As It Is in NYC

6. What is your next concert?

Good Charlotte on the 18th!

7. Which artists/bands would you love to see live?

harry styles. that bitch.

8. The farthest you’ve traveled to go to a concert?

buffalo. 5 hours. fuck one direction.

9. Best opening act you’ve seen?

lmao idk.

10. Worst opening act you’ve seen?

idk dude.

11. Have you met any bands/artists at a concert?

yeah, quite a few.

12. What’s one thing you have to bring to a concert?

ID usually?

13. What’s the most you’ve paid for a ticket?

100+ for stupid ass one direction

14. Best concert you’ve been to?

shit man. idk. this is hard??? i literally don’t have one???

15.Worst concert you’ve been to?

the first time i saw brand new in like, 2009 or 2010. it was just mega disappointing. but then the times i saw them last year were amazing so.

16. Have you been in a social media post an artist posted after a show?

a silverstein snapchat

17.Funniest concert memory?

punching being as an oceans singer in the jaw on accident?

18. Do you buy your tickets as soon as they go on sale, after, or the day of?

usually right when they’re on sale.

19. Have you ever been noticed by an artist at a concert?

i mean there’s the “omg they’re totally looking at me” thing?

20. Have you met any internet friends at a concert?

no :(

21. Which concert that you’ve been to has had the best stage setup/production?

a day to remember a few years back.

22. Have you ever caught a guitar pick, drumstick, got a setlist, etc.?

i’ve gotten set lists before.

23. Favorite concert venue?

hmmmm. i really liked the filmore in philly, and the electric factory in philly. u go philly.

24. Least favorite concert venue?

idk, big places.

25. Which do you prefer: indoor or outdoor concerts?

indoor.

26. Which do you prefer: clubs, theaters, arenas, or stadiums?

clubs.

27. Have you ever missed school or work to go to a concert?

usually if i take time off work it’s for a show, so.

28. Have you ever been surprised with tickets from someone?

hilary duff in 2005 thanks mom

29. Who do you enjoy going to concerts with?

i like going with my friend george the best.

30. General admission or seated concerts?

general admission. i hate seats SO much.

31. Have you been to multiple dates for one tour?

no.

32. Have you been to concerts 2 or more days in a row?

yeah! lmao in like 2007 or something i saw paramore on a tuesday and panic at the disco the next day or something. it was wild.

33. Have you ever received free tickets from a contest or an artist’s crew?

i’ve gotten in free to a silverstein show because i wrote an article about it.

34. Have you been front row and/or back row for a concert?

i don’t really try to get to the front anymore. i like to dance too much and when you’re so far up you usually can’t move around.

35. Have you ever gotten sick, bruised, or broken a bone after a concert?

well, i got sick ON at a show. girl threw up her taco bell all over me. i sliced my knees up at warped tour during the first fuckin band of the day. i’ve been bruised billions of times lol. i also got a black eye once.

36. Have you ever had surprise guests at a concert you attended?

we the kings played an all time low show by surprise once,

37. Did you start listening to an opening act after you saw them in concert?

at taste of chaos (i think) is the first time i heard blessthefall and they were the first band and i loved them so.

38. What’s the latest you’ve got home from a concert?

idfk??

39. When is the earliest you’ve arrived to a venue for a concert?

we got to an all time low show like, two hours early once and i hated it because it was snowing and freezing but my friend brought stuffed fuckin shells so we ate real good.

40. Have you seen your favorite artist in concert?

i’ve been lucky enough to see all of my favorite bands live

41. Longest you’ve waited in line for a concert?

see above. two hours.

42. Have you ever attended a concert alone?

often. usually.

43. What’s the best part of a concert in your opinion?

my favorite thing is when the singer stops singing and the crowd sings all of it UGH.

44. Have you ever heard/seen an artist soundcheck before their show?

nah.

45. What’s the biggest venue you’ve been to a concert at?

roger wilson stadium for one direction.

46. What’s the smallest venue you’ve been to a concert at?

the loft in poughkeepsi.

47. Have you ever had side stage seats?

nah. not my thing.

48. Which venue have you been to the most concerts at?

upstate concert hall (northern lights) in clifton park

49. Do you post a lot about a concert you’ve attended on social media or very little?

i usually post that im there…and maybe a detail after.

50. Has a concert or tour you were planning on going to got cancelled?

i actually don’t think so? thank you Jesus.

51. Have you seen a band in concert before a member left the band / they broke up?

i saw avenged sevenfold with the the Rev.

52. Favorite song you’ve heard live?

all of them. idk.

53. Have you ever seen an artist/band play an album in full?

Brand New played the devil and god, and Enter Shikari played take to the skies.

54. Which artist would you refuse to see in concert?

idk? bands i don’t like? lol.

55. What’s the craziest thing a fan has done at a concert you’ve been to?

idk. i could tell you about the one direction show but all that crazy happened before the show.

56. Which venue(s) would you love to go to for a concert?

it would be neat to go to msg.

57. Have you ever been to a concert at a venue that no longer exists?

im not sure.

58. Have you ever lost something/got something stolen at a concert?

i lost socks the first time i saw brand new. my socks fucking came off and i lost them.

59. Have people made fun of you or laughed because of how you were acting at a concert?

no. lemme fight ya.

60. Have you ever been kicked out of a concert?

no.

61. Has an artist thrown or spit water on you?

yeah, stop.

62. Have you ever seen a security guard dance to a song at a concert?

yeah.

63. Have you seen any acts you don’t like at a concert?

sure.

64. Have you ever passed out or thrown up at a concert?

nah. take care of yourself, kids!!!!

65. Have you seen any artists in concerts that you don’t like anymore?

probably.

#ask games #me #this was fun

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webpostingpro-blog · 7 years

Text

New Post has been published on Webpostingpro

New Post has been published on https://webpostingpro.com/bad-news-google-hangouts-users-third-party-apps/

Bad news, Google Hangouts users: Third-party apps

It is been numerous months in view that Google introduced the discontinuation of the Hangouts API, however, the information has largely flown underneath the radar. Guide for the API has already ended, and Hangouts apps are set to prevent working in only a couple weeks.

Developers and users of Hangouts apps might not get a whole lot of notification, both: Simply an onscreen message throughout Hangouts calls if an affected app is in use. Come April 25 those apps might be unceremoniously dumped, and all on the way to be left is the bare bones Hangouts and some apps that Google is allowing to continue unaffected.

Why has Google discontinued the Hangouts API? Google split Hangouts into two products in advance this 12 months: Meet for video conferencing and Chat for textual content messaging. Together with that Google formally shifted Hangouts’ cognizance away from purchasers and towards the business enterprise.

SEE: Microsoft leads the p.C. in business enterprise collaboration gear—but for a way lengthy? (TechRepublic)

“[The Hangouts] API became at the start supposed to Guide social situations for client customers as a part of Google+, while Hangouts is now turning to consciousness on company use instances,” Google said in an update to the API’s FAQ page.

Hangouts’ circulate to the enterprise as Meet and Chat doesn’t suggest you may not be capable of use it as a consumer, even though: The vintage Hangouts is sticking around, albeit without an API or any apps that increase its usefulness.

The ultimate goal seems to be to force clients towards Allo and Duo, Google’s new chat gear, even as leaving the vintage Hangouts in preservation mode.

Enterprise users may not lose all their apps in legacy Hangouts While Google is absolutely killing patron apps in Hangouts it is leaving a few corporation ones untouched. That’s excellent information for groups that need to stay with Hangouts in place of transferring to fulfill and Chat.

Google hasn’t released an actual list of which Hangouts apps will nonetheless paintings after April 25, however it did mention some so one can nevertheless be around.

Apps that, dial right into a call (like Dialpad and RingCentral), integrations with other business enterprise communications apps (like Slack), and Google’s personal on-air broadcasting gear (Toolbox, Manage Room, and Cameraman) will all still paintings.

The Great Masters of Fake News

Human progress and the establishment on which we depend are more often than not based on the work of people who engage in deceit and pretend news. Religions play the greatest role and over the past 2,000 plus years, they have got created the arena Order. Every person has a role on this due to the fact ideas are systemic at some stage in societies. Companies primarily based on them dominate governments, the regulation, and the military.

What goes into the mind by the age of 7 isn’t best extraordinarily hard to overturn but units the goal of the man or woman for existence. work styles, social interchange, and human sources are all managed through what the parents and instructors pressure into them.

So what’s fake news

Consistent with Wikipedia sites that interact with it are accountable for hoaxes, propaganda and of a path, ‘disinformation purporting to be actual information.’

It could be taken further, but, because the perception systems also fall into this class. only people with inner knowledge are capable of doing away with the fiction and get to the underlying facts. For most of the people, this is impossible because the smoke screens and prison limitations are too sturdy and too huge to navigate.

The Spirit of the Universe, however, is getting rid of the latter in order that mildly shines through the darkness. As it is the Amazing Writer it’s chargeable for guy’s blindness and the institutions on which he depends. It additionally made our minds to work in such a manner that governments may control them.

Whilst the general public do not agree with in this kind of element their lack

Of expertise and denial of the facts are largely responsible for their reasoning. Globally we see a motion of human beings far away from the traditions as they engage in something precise. They speak to and with the Spirit.

This fact is likewise hidden from most people who aren’t intended to listen or apprehend it. They ridicule and goal everybody who claims a connection to the General Spirit. The spiritual Companies have banned it as being ‘from the devil.’ They also banned reincarnation.

It’s miles due to my memory of reincarnation and an imaginative and prescient given to me between lives that have enabled me to talk out and condemn them as the Fantastic masters of faux news. Their goal is to trick people into believing their propaganda, inclusive of the existence of heaven and hell. Their Wonderful hoaxes are the so-called prophets or ‘Sons of God’ who supposedly got here from heaven to teach man God’s ways.

Have a New App? Here’s How You Can Start Marketing It

Why are apps so popular these days? Maybe it has the whole lot to do with anybody owning and using smartphones and tablets for purchasing and each day duties. Apps assist us to organize our lives, boom productiveness at paintings, get the suit and save. In case your corporation recently constructed an app in your business, then advertising it is key. There are tens of millions of various apps out there, begging for interest, but only people with an effective strategy will succeed. For one, you want a Search engine optimization approach to assist put your agency and its app on the map.

There are manufacturers making millions off of selling their app, and others which might be producing regular warm leads after gifting away their app at no cost. Again, the only manner in your app to gain something desires your business has is to properly promote it. The net is the apparent platform for this, which means setting collectively a web advertising and marketing campaign. Nearby Seo corporations can absolutely assist improve your app’s rating the use of various techniques.

You could additionally strive to enforce the subsequent strategies into your strategy.

Hire a Seo business enterprise to Build a Microsite

You do not want a fully functioning website to marketplace your new app. An easy microsite is ideal. This can be one web page or two to 3 pages, showcasing the details and demonstrating the capability. You may learn plenty from the likes of Course and Snapchat.

Another option would be to expand a teaser internet site, which is right if you’ve yet to launch your app. This ought to be created about one or months beforehand. You can use this website to entice users and gather their emails in trade for maintaining them published on the approaching launch.

Blog All approximately it

Publishing posts for your Blog and third birthday party websites can truly assist Construct buzz for your new app. Of route, you may need to put in force key phrases to assist the content rank. You could Rent one of the satisfactory Neighborhood Search engine optimization companies that will help you generate an efficient list of key phrases. They also can help with growing the content material and dispensing it in your commercial enterprise Weblog and 0.33 birthday party blogs.

Use Social Media to Share Your Posts

It’ not sufficient to virtually put up your content to your Weblog and others’ websites. You need to spend the majority of some time promoting those pieces as a whole lot as feasible. This is made easy with social media networks. You may use systems like Google+, Fb, LinkedIn, and Twitter. Focus on selling your app some instances each week.

New Rules for Uploading Applications in the Google Play Store

In reaction to the changing times, the quest engine behemoth Google Inc. Is tightening screws at the applications which might be being uploaded to the Play Keep. The organization has put in vicinity a special group to display the new programs for bugs, sexually specific cloth and malware. It has positioned in this mechanism to strengthen its age-associated score machine in order that its merchandise are in tune with time. Like Apple, Google has its running machine strolling in specific gadgets. To be greater specific, Google has its proprietary Android software program powering numerous devices. Each year, builders make a large wide variety of applications whose functionalities range from calendars to video video games. So, it’s miles pretty herbal to see an up to date gadget in place to check the brand new programs developed with the aid of developers internationally. In this newsletter, we would be looking at the guidelines the search engine behemoth has introduced for the first time for the benefit of the readers who plan to expand new programs.

Updated policies

The individuals who need exceptional applications look ahead to the Google Play Keep for downloading them. The programs which might be up for grabs include virtual games, enjoyment software, gaming applications and social media applications. The Silicon Valley software corporation desires to carry certain policies to tighten the exceptional before importing the programs to the Play Save.

A content first-class crew might take a look at whether or not the programs getting uploaded observe the stipulated standards inside the software industry. However, it is not installing location as stringent regulations as what the Cupertino company has incorporated in its packages Shop to set the high benchmark of first-class. Yet, it has made certain that the policies are in sync with the changing times in order that only applicable programs get uploaded to its Google Play Store.

1. An expert group will display every application submitted by developers to locate any variant within the content as according to the guidelines laid. Earlier, it used automated era for screening the applications. The manual intervention is reintroduced to capture and remedy the system defects the automatic gadget has overlooked.

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