#THE ABSOLUTE CURSEDNESS OF THIS I’M SORRY

[bottombaron]

iuk,yk.

[ryuichirou]

i saw a twst piss shade thread on twitter and was sharing to acquaintances how Idia is so often hc to piss in a bottle, energy too strong, and so! i wanna ask who do you think would piss in their bottom's mouth or ass :D your ask box has been quietly uncursed those days by what's answered and i thought of that so i'm not sorry uwu

Anon, this is such a long overdue reply, but I never forgot about your ask. In fact, I was saving it for a rainy day (golden rainy god I hate myself), because the mere fact of having such an ask in our ask box was making me happy. I really appreciate the cursedness of it, and I especially appreciate you considering us an authority on such an important, topical and very complicated question.

(by the way, of course Idia would pee in a bottle – the guy is all about convenience!)

Let’s get into it lol

Ace – would. This absolutely isn’t his go-to, but I can picture him both having an accident and doing it on purpose just because of how much of an asshole he is sometimes. He probably wouldn’t expect it to be this hot, he was just being a dick, but…

Trey – wouldn’t, but he would think about it… but this is just one of a million cursed kinky things that Trey thinks about hypothetically. He is also the type to apologise a lot afterwards and clean his bottom’s mouth thoroughly lol

Cater – would also think about it, but probably wouldn’t dare to do it. He also might do a fake “oops, sorry” afterwards.

Ruggie – he absolutely would for money, but no one is really offering ;( “Weird stuff you’re into, but sure” type of thing.

Jack – he wouldn’t… intentionally. He is super against it, the idea would sound revolting to him. But he is also a young pup and can’t always control himself, so he might have a little “marking territory” moment.

Azul – wouldn’t, he probably would think it’s gross. If something like this happened accidentally, he would be more embarrassed than smug about it…

Floyd – would. Sometimes because he just wants to piss inside his lover’s mouth (especially if Riddle (or Idia…)’s been annoying him), sometimes he just feels so aroused that he can’t help himself, and sometimes he just feels like peeing but doesn’t feel like moving. He likes doing it a lot.

Jade – absolutely would. But only if the situation is perfect for it because this isn’t something that he can overuse, so to speak. He knows that his potential partners wouldn’t expect him to do something like this, so he has to catch the most perfect moment of bliss and pleasure to shock his bottom with his special hot liquid lol

Kalim – he would, I’m sorry Jamil. He would do it on accident the first time, and it would be in the butt, but after that he would kind of get into it… he doesn’t do it all the time of course, and he is a little embarrassed to bring it up, but all this shyness goes away whenever he’s having sex.

Rook – would, but isn’t allowed :( Doesn’t mean that he absolutely never does it, mind you. But there is a very strict policy in Vil’s bedroom that he does break from time to time, to be completely fair. And with the other boys too, but not always – he is weirdly strategic about how he uses his urine. 🤔

Ortho – he would adjust his special gear just to try it out, and if he gets a fun reaction out of it, he’ll do it again! But he also was partially interested if niisan would be able to tell that the liquid he squirted inside of his butt is different by consistency and temperature… it’s not real pee, so it shouldn’t be a problem, right?

Lilia – would, he did it with a lot of boys back in the day, and he still does it now; he also kind of taught Silver that this is something that could happen in case of an emergency if you can’t leave your pee smell in the woods for some reason.

Sebek – would, and this is 90% because of what Lilia has taught Silver. Sebek knows that this is complete bs, but he got so flustered and shocked when Silver got down and opened his mouth, that he couldn’t process it or say anything in protest. 

[obeyme-sinners]

Can you do a scenario where everyone plays cards against humanity? If that's to mucj for you, just the brothers. I've been sending a lot of asks recently, I'm sorry if it's overwhelming you.

Don't worry about it! My headcanon requests are closed for now but feel free to come say hi in my asks still, I'd love to talk 💕 honestly I loved this ask, I play CAH a lot with online friends (would anybody be interested in playing sometime? I'm willing to set up some small games 👀) so I uh... Have many stories to tell, eheheheh.

This also got a little long soooo oops,,, I might have to do a part two 😂

When you get the boys to play CAH, you really have to be ready for chaos. There's no other way that this is going to be going down.

Lucifer has sighs for days. He reads all the cards with the most flat voice possible, no matter the card, which somehow manages to get Belphie giggling every time, because WOW Luci is just so done with this shit??

Beel is the one that ends up getting kinda flustered the most, all the sex and violent jokes makes him laugh but also ??? Wow humans also find this funny??

Satan is picky about whether or not white cards make sense grammatically with the black card, so when he's the card czar it's best to make sure that whatever you choose is going along with the card.

Asmodeus of course always ends up having the raunchiest cards, and will full on cackle if his card makes the czar blush or stutter. He is the most shameless one in the game, lmao.

Mammon and Levi are actually pretty familiar with the game before you even bring it up and so when you actually get Lucifer to agree to play, they're both grinning like maniacs because they KNOW the chaos that's about to ensue

Belphie is barely paying attention, he chooses the answers that are arguably the most cursed ("how did I lose my virginity?" "Bees?") And they almost never fail to get Lucifer to do The Sigh as he reads them, which always gets Belphie to giggle

Now, when the undateables join in... Things only get more chaotic

Solomon is absolutely DELIGHTED that you got everyone to play CAH because now he can be weird and he's absolutely going to be matching Belphie's cursedness step for step, which tends to throw everything into chaos

Unfortunately for Simeon, he was not told what CAH was beforehand and... Oh. Oh boy, someone save the sweet angel boy he was NOT ready to be making a game out of bigger, blacker dicks and questions of "why am I all sticky?" He's often speechless with the answers that he gets and will hand them off to Solomon for him to read them as he buries his face in his hands

For his part, Diavolo is also pretty delighted, first because OH a human game? Wonderful! And two because WOW this is absolutely hilarious. He's also laughing at Lucifer's reactions, especially when Lucifer does the thing where he sighs and pushes the card that he chose forward because he just sounds so DISAPPOINTED

Now, it's kinda hard to get Barbatos to react to most things, but when there's an especially funny card combination he'll kinda laugh and shake his head with a smile, though those laughs come easier the longer the game goes on.

In the end, it's probably Asmo or Belphie, or maybe Barbatos with his unexpectedly dark sense of humor coming through who wins, throwing the table into chaos. Someone save Simeon.

[jinmukangwrites]

a bit of an odd question but what is YOUR general characterization of Hyrule? Tbh I see him as a quiet hero with heightened animal-like instincts... a strong sense of community but prefers to listen. How about yerself?

I characterize Hyrule purely by who he's with. It's an odd way too characterize someone by, but with Hyrule I think it works. For me at least. Hyrule is a lot of things—though most of those things is just anxiety but I'll get to that—and around certain kinds of people he'll hide parts of himself and other parts of himself he'll let show. I'll try my best to describe my characterization of the Russian Nesting Doll named the Hero of Hyrule, but honestly my characterization of him is mostly sights and sounds and feelings rather than words.

The thing I think is unique about Hyrule is that he's literally whatever you want him to be. If you played his game, you'll know what I'm talking about. This guy really isn't given any motives or past. Nothing besides he's a wondering traveler with a pure heart who was tasked with gathering the Triforce to save Zelda. The rest is you, the player.

The Hyrule we know from JoJo's comics is very reserved. He's very doubtful of his own abilities. He looks up to people who are distinguished and very rarely will you see him show off or speak up around these people. I honestly think one of the craziest things he's ever done was hold the master sword right after Time's like "bitch don't do it". You could see it in his eyes that if he wasn't with others who were encouraging him he would have backed away from that sword like it was on fire.

He feeds of people with more outgoing nature's. What I mean by that is that if Wild comes up to him and asks "you wanna explore this random cave" Hyrule will reluctantly give an affirmative and slowly as the day wears and tears on he will absolutely slowly absorb Wild's cursedness and let his own shine. He starts getting gremlin around people with gremlin energy. Not because he'd not always gremlin or he's afraid to be, it's just because other people and their thoughts of him are so ingrained in his head that really, he's whatever he thinks people want him to be.

He has a lot of self doubt. A lot of self hate. He can never quite believe it when people tell him compliments and he's never proud if he knows something someone else doesn't. He's convinced that the only reason he's with these people who are so clearly heroes is because he was the last choice. The only option. The final roll of the dice.

He's a gentle soul. He hardly ever yells or says vulgar things. He'd much rather approach things the easiest most painless way possible for others. He has a soft, trusting smile and a presence that screams companionship even if he doesn't know that himself. He's so brave without even realizing it and he'll retreat to his shell if anyone tries to tell him that.

He's smart. He's quick. He's experienced. He often knows exactly what to do and how to do it but he panics a lot when there is pressure on him to do so from people he respects. He trembles and his voice waivers and he'll quickly shut up the moment someone expresses any kind of frustration towards him.

His relationship with Legend though I think is special in a way that the Hyrule with Legend would be the closest to who he really is. There's no proof in JoJo's comics of this, but it's just how I like to imagine him. When he's alone with Legend, he's a lot more sarcastic. He's a lot more reckless or brash or outspoken. They share a special bond because of their timelines, and whole some may think Hyrule would completely shut down if he finds out Legend is the Hero before him, I like to think that's he'd open up a little. I don't know why, but I just do.

Sorry if i didn't describe my characterization of him very well. Like I said, he's not a list of words to me. He's a setting sun, he's the smell of pine, he's a trickling stream over polished river rocks. He's a warm smile. A trembling hand. A single tear. A heavy sword and a skip in the step. He's clean hands but dirt under the nails and grease on his cheeks. He's a toothy smile. A bitten lip. He's a broken nose and tear tracks. He's a shaking, cold, wild critter that doesn't know his own claws. And he's so much more.