#THINKING ABOUT THE EVERMOORE MAN

[spacetrashpile]

talked to my friend about how empires s2 is haunted again and jesus christ

[systastic]

hi! i dont want to make things harder w/ you but if itd be cool a level one/two (choose either, idm) of a witch w/ cottagecore aesthetic/vibe? optionally inspired off of empires s2 shubble, but feel free to go as canon-divergent as you want. ty in advance and i hope you're having a good timezone ^^

you had my attention at “cottagecore”! skipping you up because inspiration is high :] —🌳

meow still don’t know anything about empires qmq… hoping mew like her anyways!! —🍥

name :: shelby, shelley, marie, viola, laurel, ivy, endora, faye, celeste, hazel, olive, juniper

age :: between 18 n 23 ; ageslider!

pronouns :: she/her, they/them, spark/sparks/sparkself, ast/aster/asters/asterself, bud/buds/budself, clo/clover/clov/clovs/cloverself, lau/rel/aur/laur/laurelself, man/mangrove/mangroves/mangroveself, glim/glimmer/glimmerself, glow/glows/glowself

roles :: perinaut, ameliorator, resonancian, anchor

species :: human (witch) ; ruler of evermoore

gender identity :: fadingsunsetgender, mothgender, noctofloric, glimcollectic, lustrellaic, naturewivic

orientation :: ace sapphic (out of respect 2 the person playing the character! also iirc she has a wife in canon? -🍥)

source :: empires smp s2

aesthetic :: witchcore, goblincore, mossy, soggy

appearance description :: olive stands at five feet and two inches tall, being a good foot or so shorter than her wife. hazel doesn’t mind the gap between their heights all that much much so long as glim gets glimmer fair share of attention from glimmers wife throughout the day. celeste can be seen wearing her trademark outfit whenever she is out and out: green overalls and a green witch’s hat, a purple turtleneck, brown leather boots, and a half-length purple cape with scalloped edges. her pockets are constantly stuffed full of random items like rocks, weeds, cool things she found, and her handy-dandy wand for spell work! glow wears glows style with pride, rarely ever changing glows wardrobe unless something unprecedented happens (ie loss of friend or family, ball or another former occasion, unusual events happening out of the blue). vines and flowers abound on their clothes, growing between the seams and over delicate stitchwork to help protect them. endora’s magic does most of the work — but man wouldn’t dare tell the plants that. they’re doing a good job in mangrove eyes.

personality description :: ivy is a menace and a terror to the local ecosystem, not because clo is disrupting it or being harmful to the plants within, but due to the fact that clover antics tend to draw the attention of the animals within and distract them from their daily lives. clover friends are mostly forest animals that live within evermoore, such as frogs, axolotls, smaller birds, ladybugs, and even worms. viola always seems to be up to something, whether it be digging a giant hole in rel backyard, befriending swamp creatures, or executing frog heists on friends. toady jr. did not deserve jail time! their quirky personality has earned them friends and foes alike who either admire their freedom and unabashed actions or think them reckless due to their tendency to leap before they look. at least ast is still on aster way to prove the school of magic wrong: aster is more than capable of becoming a full-fledged witch no matter what kind of insults they hurl!!

source: here n here!!

[authorofcelesti]

Shelby flew through the storm, narrowly dodging bolts of lightning. She considered turning her broom around and heading back to the familiar evermoor, but she shook her head against it.no, i left for a reason. This way, the Witch police will stop hunting me down.

A few minutes and seventeen bolts of lightning later, she figured she should land before she was actually dead. She quickly landed in a small clearing and used her cloak and broom to create a tent. She set down her bag to use as a pillow and quickly fell asleep.

<><><>

The next morning Shelby woke up, confused as to where she was. But then she remembered everything. The battle, the explosion, packing, the storm. I never did check to see if the spell worked or not. Crawling out of her makeshift tent, which had done a surprisingly good job of keeping her dry, she stood up and looked around the clearing. The tall pines dripped with leftover raindrops from last night and there was a small pond to her left. Shelby walked over and looked at her reflection in the clear water of the pond and compared it to her wanted poster. She had a spare set of clothes that Katherine had given her to try on about a week before Sausage became possessed, but even with them on, she knew it wouldn't be enough. She tried anyway though.

The clothes were very practical and a lot thinner than her now very ripped sweater and overalls. But she was a lot farther south and it was quite a bit warmer. Katherine had made her a loose blue shirt along with a pair of shorts held up by suspenders. The clothes had come wrapped in a navy blue cloak that had small gems scattered around it, making it look like the night sky. Shelby pulled the hood of the cloak up to cover her brown hair and checked her reflection before sighing. It would have to do until she could either make or find a potion to change it. Which was gonna be a top priority if she wanted to successfully hide from the Academy.

With a sigh, she pulled a map from her bag. Now, she thought to herself, where’s the closest village?

<><><>

The village was a peaceful place. The houses were whitewashed and had multi-colored roofs, reminding the witch of Chromia. Maybe I could settle here, she thought, but decided against it as she saw the town's newsboard.

Smack-dad in the middle, between help wanted advertisements and pictures of missing cats, was her wanted poster. Glancing around, she pulled up her hood a bit farther before ducking towards where she sensed magic. It seemed that she would have to travel quite a ways farther to be rid of the posters.

After a few minutes of walking, she found the potion shop. As Shelby walked through the door, a bell above jingled, alerting the shop owner to the presence of a customer.

"Hello there! What can I get you?"

The shop owner was an older man walking out of the backroom of the shop. His blond hair was pulled into a small ponytail at the base of his neck. He had blue eyes and large black wings folded behind his back. A young man, most likely his son, trailed behind him.

"Hi, I'm just looking for something to change my hair color."

"Of course! What color were you thinking?"  The shop owner said as he walked over to a shelf. He picked up one of the bottles and held it towards her." We just made a batch of this bright orange. It would go well with your eyes

"I don't think that I'm near bold enough for that, maybe white?"

"Hmm, I’m pretty sure we have some in the back." He said before turning to his son. "Tommy could you-"

"On it, Dadza." The boy said before rushing into the back.

“What currency do you carry?” the man asked her once his son had passed through the curtains.

“Oh.” Shelby hadn’t even thought of how she would pay for the potion. “I don't really have any currency, but I do have things to trade, like, uh.” she quickly rifled through her satchel for something that could be considered valuable. 

Mushrooms? No. spare rockets? Maybe. Oh wait! The young witch pulled out a handful of blaze rods. The shop owner’s eyes widened at the sight of them. 

“How in the world do you have so many?” he asked her. She opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by a voice behind her.

“C’mon dad, she’s obviously some kind of adventurer.” Shelby turned to see two boys walk into the shop through the front door. The one who spoke wore a yellow sweater and a gray beanie covering his brown hair. She also noticed that he was slightly translucent and seemed to float an inch or two above the floor. A ghost, Shelby realized. He seemed more, sentient than the other ghosts she’s dealt with. His friend trailing behind him had long pink hair and tusks jutting out the corners of his mouth.

“Well yes, Wil, I can tell that.” the winged man told the newcomer. “I was just surprised that she had so many. You must've spent quite a lot of time in the nether.” he told her.

“You could say that.” she said, “Is this enough to trade for the potion?” 

He waved his hand. “Oh yes, yes. Most definitely. I can even toss in a few healing potions for you.”

“That would be great,” Shelby said, “ thank you.”

<><><>

Back in her clearing, Shelby looked at the potion and scrunched her nose. It smelled absolutely terrible. But if she really wanted the authorities of her trail, this is what she needed to do. She plugged her nose and gagged down the milky potion. She looked at her reflection and watched as her hair slowly turned white, starting at her roots and changing her naturally dark brown hair. She took a step back and gave a little spin. With both the hair color and new clothes, she doubted that anyone would recognize her from her posters. Now she just needed to find a place to settle. But it would need to be even farther from the evermoor than she already was. She carefully wrapped the empty bottle in her large cloak and put it in her satchel before jumping on her broom and taking off with the setting sun on her right.

<><><>

A week of flying later, Shelby was pretty sure she had found the right place. It was relatively isolated, so no one would try to find her, but there was a village with a spellbook store a bit to the east. She was just glad that the bookstore owner had forgiven her for accidentally casting a lightning bolt on him. 

She had set up about halfway up a steep mountain, and as much as she loved sleeping outside, she was getting sick of it pretty quickly.

"Ugh, I miss my bed!" She was currently sprawled on the grass right next to her campfire, a book of spells open next to her. The contents were mostly storm-based, which she had found an affinity for back in the academy. But that wasn’t as important as getting a good night’s sleep. Her back ached from the stupid rock that seemed to dig into her side no matter what position she slept in. she needed a house, stat. She just didn't know where to start.

Maybe I can use magic, like with that first hut in the evermoor. She sat up and ran over to her chest to search for items she could use in a house-summoning spell. She came up with a few scattered items that could work, a few pieces of deepslate, some blue-leafed saplings, some candles, as well as a few magical bits and bobs she'd found.

She set the items in front of her and studied them. Shelby couldn't really remember how she'd done it back in the evermoor. But if she'd figured it out once, the witch was positive she could do it again.

She looked over at the Gem crystal and picked it up. She must've grabbed it on her way out.

“How did Gem say these worked?” she asked no one in particular as she turned the Gem crystal over in her hands. To any normal person, it would just look like an amethyst crystal, like the ones found in Lizzie’s mines. But because of her magical training,  the witch could sense the reservoir of mana contained inside. She recognized the magical signature from the amethyst that had been integrated into Sausage’s magical staff. Maybe I can use it to make a new wand? She considered the thought, but quickly discarded it. The mana inside was too much to fit inside just a wand, and she didn’t have the knowledge of how to filter it out. That was more of wizardry than witchcraft.

The Witch set down the crystal on the ground beside her. But she must've done it too harshly, because her ears were soon met with a high-pitched hissing noise. Startled, she looked back at the crystal and realized that there was a large fracture running lengthwise along its purple surface. The mana inside, she realized, it’s escaping! She picked up the crystal and started panicking. At the rate the crystal was going, it was going to explode soon, and Shelby definitely didn't want that.

Acting on instinct, she threw the crystal away from her.

There was a flash of light and Shelby closed her eyes to avoid being blinded. When she opened them again, there was a tower sitting where she had thrown the cracked Crystal. It had a deepslate base with walls made out of a royal blue wood. What the,  she thought, did- did I do that? But how?  She looked around her little clearing and realized that she had thrown the crystal in the direction of the materials she had gathered. I guess that explains where the spell got the materials.

She walked up to the spruce door and put her hand on the doorknob. Slowly, she opened the door and was stunned by what was inside. The spell had not only conjured up a warm home, but had also furnished it with a kitchen, a fireplace, and-

“A bed!” Shelby quickly pulled off her shoes and jumped onto the soft mattress. It feels like sleeping on a cloud. And with a sigh, the runaway witch fell asleep.

<><Two months later><>

Shelby stepped out the front door of her house and yawned. It had rained the night before, so the ground under her feet squelched with each step. She heard a noise to the side of her and her eyes followed, but she froze when she spotted her mailbox with the lever on the side switched up.

Her heart stopped. Oh no, she panicked, have they found me?

She carefully opened her mailbox and pulled out the single letter placed inside. She sighed in relief as she noticed that the seal on the envelope wasn’t the Academy’s. 

In fact, she thought as she turned the letter over in her hands, weighing it slightly, I dont think ive ever seen that crest before. She carefully opened the letter and read the invitation she found inside.

Dear storm witch,

You have been chosen to participate in the witching event of the century. In the event of my death,

 I always knew that someone would have to rise and take my place as Supreme 

Witch. Which is why I’ve devised a series of games to determine my successor. 

Eight witches, one winner. Will you come out on top?

Follow the North Star during the witching Hour. it will show you the way.

Yours truly, the supreme witch

The Supreme Witch had often been talked about at the Academy. They weren't a single person, but a title passed on through mysterious circumstances. 

Well, not so mysterious to Shelby anymore.

If I was the supreme witch, I could clear my name easily! She realized, Even the Academy wouldn’t dare go against the supreme witch.

[utilitycaster]

Welcome to what may or may not become an ongoing thing as I finish Streams of Silver, the penultimate book of the first two trilogies of the Legend of Drizzt, ie, the ones I bought as ebooks. Let us assess along the following scales.

Lord of the Rings Parallels: Dwarf sets off on a journey to reclaim his lost mountain homeland. They leave home, but are chased by someone specifically in pursuit of their halfling companion, due to an object said halfling possesses. They need to flee the first real city they stop in after, among other things, causing a scene in a tavern. Wizards are spying on them from afar. They stop in a relatively kindly learned place. At one point, a beautiful woman gives Drizzt healing herbs and generic brand lembas bread. When they find their mountain stronghold, it has a hidden door that requires some degree of knowledge of the dwarven culture to open. Said stronghold is full of mithril, and was overtaken by hostile foes because the dwarves delved too deep. Someone appears to fall in battle in the stronghold, but does not.

Regis was alive but taken by the enemy.

(the Evermoors bit is far more like The Hobbit Mirkwood crossing in vibes though, as is the outwitting of trolls)

Conclusion: LOTR as FUCK. [do not respond to this with more LOTR parallels. this post is about me having fun, not about how good a nerd you are.]

Reminders that this is D&D: speaking of trolls, the regeneration and fire are a plot point, which is well done. I don't know AD&D nor do I feel the need to so there's probably other stuff. Also, they sure do be going into dungeons and finding dragons in the Icewind Dale trilogy.

Women?: Catti-brie is capable in battle, gets some armor and weaponry, and more importantly gains some degree of personality and is even a viewpoint character for the villains scenes, which is great! I still find Wulfgar so boring (he is not a woman but he allegedly has feelings for Catti-brie, which we are repeatedly told about but there is no reason other than "she is the only human woman his age around"). Sydney was pretty great though. She sucked, but at least she like, did things. Also I enjoyed Dove Falconhand's brief appearance in the Dark Elf trilogy and would like to see her more so Lady "legally distinct from Galadriel" Alustriel mentioning her was nice. Also Guenhwyvar is a female extraplanar panther. Is Guenhwyvar a girlboss? discuss.

Villainy: Apparently we haven't seen the last of Artemis Enteri but personally I loved the evil wizard subplot. Hopefully we get more of that because Mr. Enteri is fine enough but there's only so many times you can mention his jeweled daggers and excellent sword hand and stealth but wizards can fuck you up in thousands of exciting and fun ways.

The naming of parts: Looks like Mr. Eoin Colfer was not the first person to name a somewhat amoral bastard man "Artemis".

We still do not have any excuse for someone being named "Catti-brie" though and it is kind of funny when other women are named shit like Catti-brie and Alustriel and Dove Falconhand and then there's just good old Sydney.

Lavender orbs: yeah they're mentioned multiple times. Not as lavender orbs, but "lavender" is said a lot in reference to Drizzt's eyes. I did not count how many times but I may do so for The Halfling's Gem.

Other things:

You can tell the Dark Elf trilogy was written later because it is notably better. Like, this is still readable but it's way rougher.

Ideal scenario is they trade Wulfgar for Regis and Guenhwyvar but they probably won't.

Speaking of LOTR, "Twinkle" is the stupidest weapon name of all time. Mr. Do'Urden please explain what the fuck you are thinking. I know you also at some point get a different scimitar named Icingdeath and all I can think of is that 30 Rock scene where the Donaghy siblings are naming their fists for punching reasons and one of them says "Say hello to Bono and Sandra Day O'Connor."

[killmebythebeach]

Watching Sausage's episode rn and I'm like. Three sentences in and I already want to live blog

Spoilers, obviously.

"Maybe Joey and Shelby will want to fight for Katherine's love! Or maybe Jimmy and Joel will want to fight! Or Fwhip and three wardens!" Sir what.

Also not Sausage making a fighting arena. Mine heart :(

WHY IS HE GRAVITY MAN FROM AFTERLIFE?!?!

Immediately after the flashback finishes: That was weird.

"Never thought I'd have a super power!" My guy you can talk to animals.

I REALLY want to see Shelby start a business where she "accidentally" turns people to zombies so they have to go and get Sausage to fix them, and then they split the profits. There's probably a name for that.

Shelby: "I heard this humming sound..." New theory: the ghost in the Evermoore is Mumbo Jumbo

Oh wait I just realized this episode was called "the rift festival" like

THE RIFT GOT BIGGER?!?!

:( he's so scared and the visions are going so fast :( at least Bubbles said it's be all good in the end

:( that armory wasn't his home :( he had a whole other life in his old kingdom

Sunflowers' blessing. Okay.

HERMES AT THE FESTIVAL WE WIN THESE

False seeing the other empowers torment the sheriff: ._.

A very good trope is "character trying to have fun at carnival but the fortune teller reminds them of their mission"

FUCK YEAH SHELBY JOEY DUEL!!!

WHATS THIS?! KATHERINE WITH THE STEEL CHAIR?!?!

What are they doing by the rift. What's going on.

Bard has stage fright which, as an actor who can't talk in front of more than five people, same.

False and Sausage being the farthest from the rift while everyone's throwing the other paper in PROBABLY means nothing, but I will think about it a bit more than normal.

"New portal who dis" I don't watch hc that much did someone send it through the hc rift?

Very excited to see what's going on

[oscars-dumbass-central]

So the worldbuilding worm has burrowed its way into my brain through a gap in the back of my skull and now I am just thinking about which kind of alcohol each of the Empires would export/make

Dawn - Mead

Yeah, this one is easy, Dawn has bees so they get mead. But like mead is also very sweet and it reminds me somewhat of how sweet Gem is.

Gobland - Vodka

Gobland has potatoes in order to breed the pigs, and you know what you make with potatoes? Vodka! Plus fWhip gives the vibes of someone with a hidden bottle of vodka in his bag which he pretends is water.

And like Gobland probably doesn't have the best of hygiene and throughout history people would drink watered down alcohol instead of water in order to prevent getting sick from the water. So yeah, they mix vodka and water together to do that

Stratos - Wine

In ancient Greece dark red wine was a common offering for the gods due to many parts of Greece being well known for growing grapes. And since Joel is going for a whole ancient Greece-esk aesthetic I think it fits. (Plus yeah he totally constantly demands offerings of wine from the people of Lower Stratos.)

Tumble Town - Moonshine

Again, going for the classic 'cowboy' drink. Plus I just like the idea of Jimmy thinking that there is no alcohol anywhere in Tumble Town while there is an entire smuggling ring of moonshiners. Just fits his entire vibe.

Evermoore - Potions

They don't got alcohol cause Shelby is the only person there, but she does got a ton of weird potions, some of em might be alcohol. No-one is sure.

Eversea - Rum

The classic pirate beverage of choice and that's about it but I am also very tired so feel free to suggest any better ideas lmao.

Chromia - the most obnoxious colourful cocktails you can imagine

Pretty much what I said before. Tastes like candy or sugar but will completely knock you out three times as fast as anything else. May or may not come with llama spit, but according to the llama man it makes them better and no-one's gotten around to proving him wrong yet.

Cogsmead - uhhhh mead again

I don't think Cogsmead makes their own alcohol, but they do trade with Dawn so they have plenty of mead. It's in their name for crying out loud, what else would they have? (please tell me what else they would have I am tired and brain is gone)

And thatsssss it! All my brain can produce right now, have good timezone, please give suggestions on what else I could add to this

[didasgomas]

Number your prayers

December 6th, 1981 - 5:47 a.m , Edenseye Church, main altar

HO - (Pastor) Hunter Owldust CS - (Priest) Caleb Stone

HO : You'll probably notice the people looking at you a bit weird, but I promise you they'll adapt eventually. It happened to me when I took the role too, so don't worry. It's just that, uh... Father Efrat was here for, like, since my parents were babies, you know?

CS : I understand. I can imagine such a change to be overwhelming.

HO : Yeah, but to be honest, Father Efrat was really needing that retirement...

CS : How old is he, if you don't mind me asking?

HO : Uh... he turned 98 this July. Yeah, I think if you hadn't offered to replace him, he would have chosen me *nervous laughter*

CS : Does the idea of becoming the next Father upset you?

HO : Not really, don't get me wrong. I like to work for the Church, but as just the Pastor I get to spend much more time outside rather than inside, if you get me.

CS : Of course

HO : Now that I remember, you're much older than me, right?

CS : Indeed. I am perhaps what you youth call "old man"

HO : Ah no, goodness! I promise you, no one is going to call you that!

CS : I'm just playing around, don't worry

HO : I mean, you're old enough to be my dad, cause I'm only 46, but no one is going to be disrespectful towards you

CS : I know

HO : Ah, I just remembered something! Come with me!

December 6th, 1981 - 5:52 a.m , Edenseye Church, basement HO : You seeing this thing? Looks like just a very used candle holder on the wall, right? But if you do this...

*sounds of a mechanism activating and a door unlocking*

HO : Boom, you open a secret hidden door

CS : Fascinating...

HO : I know, right? Apparently it was some kind of dungeon when this church was some other building, that's why there's so many cells or whatever they're called

CS : Including the handcuffs?

HO : Yeah, I think

CS : And what about this?

HO : "This" what?

CS : Why is there a recently made steel door in the middle of a decaying old dungeon?

HO : Ah, that. Well, I'm not fully sure, but I think it arrived here from after Saint Mathilde's uh...

CS : Was destroyed?

HO : Yeah... It's a bit of a... "taboo" to talk about it here and the other villages. It was almost as important of a city as the county capital, you know?

CS : Yes, I know

HO : I think it was with the police before. Like, the local prison, you know? That's why there's a little door there on the bottom, it was where they passed the food to the other side. I think.

CS : And why was it just, left on the floor like this?

HO : Honestly, I think Father Efrat was just like "yeah, just leave it there, it's not like anyone knows about the secret entrance anyway" or something along those lines

CS : You're not taking this one bit seriously, are you?

HO : Not really

December 17th, 1981 - 3:30 p.m , Edenseye

HO - (Pastor) Hunter Owldust DI - (Villager) Drew Inshaw

HO : So, you want my help with finding your daughter? DI : Yes, my eldest, Sarah. Please, we need to find her- HO : Okay, okay, calm down, Mr. Inshaw. Can you tell me what happened? DI : It was five days ago. She sometimes runs away to visit her mother in Evermoor, so me and my wife are used to her not being home for two or three days. But she didn't show up back home yesterday at all. My and my wife spent the entire afternoon searching all around the village, but no one had seen her. HO : Not even in Olivecloud? DI : No, not even there. HO : Did you at least talk to her mother? DI : Yes! I went to talk to her face to face this morning, but she told me Sarah had left the day before yesterday! HO : Alright, and what did you do afterwards? DI : I went to the Father just a couple hours ago, I wanted to ask if there was a possibility to start a search for her, but... HO : ...But? DI : But he didn't even know who she was! HO : Well, I think that's normal, he's still meeting everyone and getting used to our village DI : I- I guess. But he did let us look around for her for just a while, and she wasn't in the church. HO : So you want me to help with the search instead? DI : Please Pastor, she's still only a teenager! If she's gone somewhere else outside of here, she could get herself in danger! HO : *sigh* How about this: I'll look around a bit myself, and if I don't find any clues, I'll talk to Father Caleb about opening the search. Does it sound enough? DI : Yes! Oh thank you so much, Hunter! HO : It's my duty to help, isn't it?

December 18th, 1981 - 23:29 p.m , Edenseye Church

HO - (Pastor) Hunter Owldust

HO : (whispering to self) I don't really expect to find anything there, but...

*sounds of stairs creaking*

HO : ... Hair? Why was she down here? *sounds of footsteps* *sounds of a mechanism activating and a door unlocking*

HO : (whispering) Blood...

*sounds of footsteps*

*low growling similar to that of a wild wolf*

HO : OH MY LORD! OH GOD!

*growling gets louder* *sounds of something hitting metal bars*

HO : Can- Can you still hear me?! Who did this to you?!

*sounds of a mechanism activating and a door locking*

HO : Who- Who's there?!

*creaking noise similar to floorboards*

*loud screams before something heavy falls to the ground*

December 19th, 1981 - 9:20 a.m , Olivecloud market square

RM - (Villager) Rita Malyn TQ - (Villager) Theresa Quartermaine

[passing conversation]

TQ : Any news on the Inshaw girl from Edenseye? RM : I heard her father is going to give up searching for her TQ : Because the Pastor is gone now too? RM : Yes. He thinks that she was able to convince the Pastor to let her run away, and that he had his own motives for leaving TQ : Maybe it has to do with his sister RM : Maybe. It's been years since they last saw each other. But why he didn't warn anyone is still so confusing TQ : Maybe he thought everyone would be fine since they have a new Priest RM : Perhaps. But do you think he's ever going to return? TQ : I don't know. Maybe yes, maybe not

Short-story for my "In Mortality" au of @missr3n3 's cdta story because my creative ass can't keep focused on just one thing at a time

I chose the title because it sounds spooky but also because the first mention of Caleb (the biblical spy) is in Numbers 13

[recapcrew]

Week 27 Transcript

Vídeo

Intro

Extra extra, read all about it! Welcome to the Empire’s Recap, and today we will be going over the chaos and drama of our (somewhat) respected rulers!

This week is the end of something special to us all… no, not 2022! The crossover! But first we must go back in time a bit, to when the Emperor's first crossed over to Hermitcraft.

Joey

Avast! Fashionably late, Pirate Joe is finally showing his side of the Battle of Fort Riffless, though I’m not sure he properly understood the Battle part. He was sad to watch his new crew leave with hardly a second thought, and the missile shot at Grumbot could’ve blown up his new concrete maker!

Thankfully, it didn’t, and the open Rift provided a…convenient opportunity. Miss Shelby was having some trouble deciding whether to go through the portal or not, and well. Joey “helped”.

With most of Empires to himself now, Pirate Joe did what pirates do best: raid! He cleaned out Hermitopia of all its valuables, storing them in a secret room inside of his secret basement with greedy glee. They don’t need them anymore!

But if the other Emperors were going to be gone for a while. Well.

It’s pranking time. And Joey knows just who deserves a little pranking. Someone who was definitely on the other side of the portal.

Joey’s first visit to Evermoore in a while gives him a chance to marvel at the massive frog Shelby left behind - would she notice him missing?

Well, hopefully she will notice the change in her storage. A little pirate “magic” has replaced all of her valuable and important items with pieces of coal!

It even hit her shop - good luck making back the diamonds with no potion ingredients, miss Witch!

But what’s even more piratey than stealing treasure?

Burying it with a treasure map, of course! And Joey chooses Dawn as his X-marks-the-spot; if Shelby thinks it was Gem who stole her things, the two of them can fight over it, and that’s a show he wants to see!

Shelby

The missing emperors aren’t all that missing, and their arrival onto the Hermitcraft server is heralded by chaos, shown by the many ways people got out of Grian’s very inaccessible rift cave. One of those methods is death - demonstrated quite nicely by Shelby Shubble.

Rescue Squad Scar shows up with an elytra and some teleportation cookies, and then Shelby meets up with Oli so he can show her the Christmas village everyone is building in!

New King Sausage is working at the village and Shelby gets herself appointed as Court Magician, and Oli as Court Jester, of course. Cub visits for some fun and Shelby gets a bootleg wand for while she’s on Hermitcraft.

[SHUBBLE] Ok but whenever anyone wants a potion to do something like, crazy and funky, I do it for free!

[SAUSAGE] She turned me into a zombie one time!

[SHUBBLE] Yeah that was free!

[SAUSAGE] Yep! I didn’t pay anything for that one!

[SHUBBLE] And I’d do it again for free too!

[NARRATOR] Nothing wrong with that!

Sausage leads Shelby on an adventure for nether wood, with a perfectly normal reaction to their nether hub, because honestly? The hermits are actually insane

[SHUBBLE] These people are rich rich.

[SAUSAGE] Yeah these are real nether stars, each one of these is a nether star. That’s one wither kill per star, and they’re everywhere. Yeah mhm.

[SHUBBLE] Man, I’m feeling, uh, very inadequate all of a sudden.

[SAUSAGE] Yeah, these guys are built differently, it’s ok, we can’t all…

[NARRATOR] Jevin visits their humble abode with some Christmas hats, really taking on the role of Santa.

She builds her home in the Christmas village, but she doesn’t get to live in it for long when Oli comes by yelling about the rift closing!

A final goodbye to the Hermits and Shelby arrives back in empires with Tortoise back on her head. She travels home through a village where she comes across her own wanted poster.

At least she’s worth quite a lot?

Scott

Scott’s feeling a bit homesick, and with the rift shrinking day by day it’s probably time to check out and head back home.

In return for Scars hospitality while Scott’s been on Hermitcraft, Scott does some “community service” around Scarland, fixing a few things that were broken and adding in a few hidden lights to make the place more Scar Safe.

Showcasing his love for cats, he builds Jellie a cat tree in the hotel! She’s a hard worker, she deserves a gift as well.

Since Scott can’t light up the whole park with hidden lighting, the next best thing is a security force - that answers to Jellie, of course.

The last, final, best gift - if you’re a little bit of a narcissist - is Scott leaving statues of himself around the apartment.

Scarland will forever have a touch of Scott Smajor when Scott heads home…

Which he has to do quickly, as when he turns up at the rift it has shrunk quite drastically and is now just one block. He leaves a note and heads through, to the other side of the rift.

A wander through the abandoned Hermitopia yields some goodies, and when he checks his Llama outpost, Bdubs has left him his Secret Santa!

But he can’t be wandering about forever, so back to Chromia he goes! It looks a little more orange than when he left it, and to say his reaction is dramatic would be understating it.

[SCOTT] Chromia, a place to dye for! Lets go home. Home sweet--- WHAT—

fWhip

[NARRATOR] With fWhip still on the Hermitcraft server, we discover that Mr. Cuddles still owns fWhip’s apartment in Scarland before heading over to the Holiday Village.

The Holiday Village being the Empires crew’s home away from home and all, fWhip needed a tour. During this tour, fWhip hands out presents from Scarland which are all the blocks that accidentally lagged into his inventory. Sausage also continuously tries to get fWhip to remember his lore life back on Empires but fails, even with some odd-looking ears.

fWhip later checks in on the impending closure of the rift where he discovers it is definitely time to go locate where Sniff and Gary disappeared to. Sniff is the first to be successfully located, closely followed by Gary. With both Sniff and Gary back home, fWhip follows them through, where he finally remembers his life as a goblin.

Back in the Goblands, Sniff is reunited with his brother, Snort and Gary is escorted to temporary housing. fWhip decides that if Gary is to remain in the Goblands, there needed to be a hospital for Gary. Our goblin king goes scavenging for materials in the old Hermits’ home away from home for this hospital. A frog doctor is hired for the new Gobland facility. Thus, Gary is moved into the back-alley hospital in Gobland to heal before officially returning to Animalia.

Sausage

Mythical Sausage spends his Christmas break with many people. Starting off with his wood Papi Keralis, he shows Sausage the mini Sanctuary down below, decorating the new wood farm. After that, Sausage helps his thunder daddy decorate the new tree in the Christmas area. With the new balls he adds, it looks fantastic.

Pearl takes a tour around his new house, which fits her theme very well. With news of the Rift shrinking, Sausage introduces his new child Sunny.

Speaking of which, once both members of Hermitcraft and Empires congregate around the Rift, Pearl and Sausage have a small moment aside from the rest. They talk and are both thrown back into memories.

Sausage remembers the tragedy that is the season one finale. Pearl dies in his arms, so he's filled with the need to get her back.

[SAUSAGE] The days turn to weeks. The weeks turn to months. And the months turn to years. Pearl could never be saved. Now I’m just an old man, defeated, but something interesting happened…

[NARRATOR] After travelling the multiverse, he meets Saint Pearl as an old man, who throws him into Afterlife as a way to relax. After dying, he ascends back to heaven, from which he takes a nap and is thrown into Empires season two, where we are now.

Having had his vision, Sausage jumps through the portal with a final wave. It's clearly not the end for this man, it’s a beginning.

Outro

And with that, join us next week for more chaos and shenanigans! Thank you for watching, liking, and subscribing, and thanks to everyone helping with the project, check them all out below!

[faffodil]

everyone in empires au season 2!

Here we go again! For people who haven't seen this before, I've basically sorted a whole bunch of mcyt/adjacents into all the empires in s2, and provided headcanons and reasoning as to why theyre in that empire :D

As always i am open to suggestions/ideas for reasons/changes - just send me an ask!

Similarly, if you want me to add someone who's not there, you can also send me an ask!

Currently includes: Hermitcraft (specifically Season 9), Dream SMP, Bear SMP, Origins SMP, a few of the afterlife guys who arent already in empires, Traffic SMP(s), and a few other misc. mcyts

This will be edited as new information about empires names comes out/i add more people ^^

Key:

Local = person who lives nearby/in what could be considered part of an empire

Citizen = someone who is legally registered as part of an empire

Visitor = somone who is staying there temporarily/does not live in the empire

Inhabitant = lives in an empire but is not yet registered as a citizen

First person in every section is the ruler, but will have their specific title rather than one shared title (updated as the ccs tell us)

Archaeologists arent categorised in the same way as they are nomadic

---Stuff in [square brackets] is referring to an as-of-yet unnamed empire ---

Evermoore:

Shelby - (ruler) - Witch

Boomer - local - frog man :]

Tina - local

George - local

Charlie Slimecicle - local - slimey boi. Literally just a sentient slime. No-one's really sure why he and jevin are sentient but shelby thinks it was probably because the last witch to be sent out here was doing illegal magic (she thinks they were bored to death by the surroundings)

Jevin - local - swamp lad, sentient, see above

Petezahhutt - inhabitant - curious about the sentient slime rumours, wanted to know if they were like him (slime hybrid) they weren't but he stuck around to help them find their feet (literally because they were having trouble keeping a humanoid shape for long periods of time)

Dream - inhabitant - heard about the magic qualities of evermoore and moved there. Shelby thinks hes very brave to be studying the fog, and dream often gets stranded far from home bc the mist is feeling unhelpful

Sanctuary:

Sausage - (ruler)

Ivory - inhabitant - bc shes running away from something

Sniff - citizen - builder

Martyn - inhabitant - sought sanctuary and then proceeded to move in and annoy cleo to no end

Cleo - citizen - has lived here her whole life but is seriously considering moving. Joe is the only thing stopping her. And the fact that snake hair isnt exactly normal y'know

Joe Hills - inhabitant - moved from Stratos but only cleo knows this. Everyone else thinks hes normal :)

Tumble Town:

Jimmy - Sheriff - do i need to say more?

Tango - citizen - owns a ranch outside town :]

Billzo - inhabitant - took refuge from one very angry joey (who thought he was part of skeletrons army) and met eryn. Decided to hang around and cause mischief

Eryn - citizen - family has a farmstead near Tumble Town. Troublemaker

Schlatt - citizen - works in the saloon

Quackity - inhabitant - works with Schlatt

Sapnap - citizen - Eryns brother. I don't quite know why my brain decided that but it has.

Etho - citizen - works on tangos ranch. Used to be an outlaw but tango offered him a job when they met in the sherriffs office. Likes the peace outside of the town.

Sneeg - inhabitant (because no-one knows hes there) - builds little tunnels throughout the terracotta hills

Goblands:

Fwhip - (ruler) - goblin time (is short)

Skeppy - citizen - ore golem, can camouflage himself well in the cave. Fwhip found him in the deep dark and made him a citizen

Bad - inhabitant - from Eversea originally

Impulse - citizen - bc dwarf

Iskall - citizen - bc he's got a cave base this season

Pearl - citizen - she do be skrunkly

Guqqie - citizen - an alien who is desperately trying to blend in with the humans. On one hand no one's gonna notice in the Goblands, but on the other, they're gonna pick up some weird habits from the gremlins

Cub - citizen - chaos Chaos CHAOS

Mumbo - inhabitant - railway expert and infrastructure guy :] which is desperately needed bc Fwhip keeps making dangerous minecart tracks to everywhere

Eversea:

Joey - Captain

xB - citizen - bc guardian hybrid (lives in the lake w the mermaids

Niki - citizen - mermaid, sometimes follows puffy around to the other empire's ports

Puffy - visitor - another captain who frequents the bay. Trader?

Neptune - visitor - on puffy's ship (yes this is the same as last time. If it's not broken don't fix it)

Scar - inhabitant - sells magic crystals at the market. Certified scammer but is allowed to get away with it because he helps design new buildings for joey sometimes.

Micheal(mcchill) - citizen - runs a radio station from the top of one of the mountains overlooking the lagoon. Very rickety and unstable path to get up there but the broadcast can be recieved from any empire

Hypno - citizen

Animalia:

Lizzie - Mayor - Definitely a person. Elected apparently?

Antfrost - citizen - cat.

Ren - citizen - dog. Advisor to lizzie. Also bc last life the beloved

Hbomb - inhabitant - cat. Runs a cafe to draw tourists in! Theres nothing weird about this empire! :3{  <rubbing his hands together maliciously. Favourite pastime is bullying fundy whenever he walks past the cafe

James Marriot - citizen - employee of the cat cafe

Fundy - citizen - fox (and yoghurt :D)

Zedaph - inhabitant - resident scientist. Originally from off the continent but was welcomed into Animalia by lizzie because 'having a scientist proves we're as advanced as the other empires!' Hasn't caught on to the fact that the majority of the kingdom's citizens are straight-up animals and thinks theyre all hybrids like him

CPK - citizen - fox. no relation to fundy but does bond over thier shared dislike for the term fox-load because they can carry more than one block thankyouverymuch lizzie

Aimsey - inhabitant - showed up and was promptly adopted as Animalia's pet human

Archaeologists:

Pixlriffs - in charge of the team, was sent bc none of the other archaeologists wanted anything to do with the rulers over there

Xisuma - a spirit that collects cool bones to live in. Pix discovered him while unearthing an old temple and he's just kind of following the troupe around and being amazed at the world (was sealed in said temple)

EX is also trapped in a similar temple but X is doing everything he can to steer pix away from finding it/unleashing his hurricane of a brother. spoiler - it doesnt work >:D

Ori - a mildly unnerving citizen of Stratos who decided to tag along

Karl - original member of the team - keeps correcting Pix's pronunciation of the long-dead languages, and knows where finds are (or should be) long before a dig starts 👀

Skizz - original member of the team, very enthusiastic

Jack Manifold - intern who's following them around for work experience. Originally from Chromia

Chromia:

Scott - (ruler) - strange strange man

Ranboo - citizen - ive tried to put him elsewhere like four times but brain keeps saying chromia. Will update once i figure out a reason (also now i want ranboo and xornoth to talk) update: have not figured the reason but. hes staying so

Xornoth - backup leader - they found scotts empire and moved in, to his initial chagrin. Still backup ruler despite this because scott didnt trust the llamas to rule in his absence. They like looking after the llamas but kinda just hang around mostly

Wilbur - citizen - colourful language, creative

Stress - citizen - head of the flower industry (that then gets turned into dye for exports)

Beef - inhabitant - in charge of designing colourful fabrics and tapestries, originally from Sanctuary where he learnt banner-making

Hannah - citizen - works in flowers industry

Lauren - citizen - one of Scotts chief advisors, have known each other since they were little kids

[Falses]:

False :) - (ruler) - Her empire is pretty small considering its the newest but its one of the most closely knit communities as they all have to work together to improve the kingdom

Phil - citizen - hardcore survival things seem to fit here. First person to move here. Originally settled a little further downriver but ended up flying to False's area for materials and conversations anyway, and so, later moved into the centre hub of her empire to help her out and save time. DadTM

Tommy - citizen - turned up one day and false was just like well if you want you can build over there, strange bedraggled kid. Tommy did and false immediately regretted it because *cobblestone tower* Phil and False eventually managed to convince tommy to let them make his house look nice but it took a good couple of months.

Bearbubb - inhabitant - False isnt quite sure if hes a person or a literal bear as hes never spoken to anyone, but he seems polite, and built his own house so she let him stay. Although she has firmly decided he doesn't get citizen status until he asks for it. (Bear is just awkward, he'll talk to people eventually)

Sam - citizen - used to wander the server with doc because not many empires were open to hostile mob hybrids living there, then offered to help with a redstone project (an improved iron farm that was being finnicky) as he was passing and decided to stay. Tommy also took a liking to him and he built a base at the bottom of the cliff

Doc - citizen - was traveling with sam, same situation, neither of them wanted to stay in Sanctuary, where they started off, because they were tired of the new inhabitants walking on eggshells around them for months before they got used to them. His base is a pit all the way down to bedrock, affectionately known as The Well (due to its tendency to flood). There are levels all the way up with different redstone machines and storage cupboard on.

Glimmer Grove:

Katherine - princess

Beau - citizen - figured out where princess katherine was sneaking off to at night and made her agree to let beau help fight or she'd tell

Punz - inhabitant - moved from Sanctuary because he heard rumours that mercenaries might be needed. (Was only staying for the pay originally but got a little too invested and asked katherine if he and purpled could stay and help rebuild the empire too. (Will end up as head of defence for princess Katherine in the future but shhh)

Purpled - inhabitant - moved from Sanctuary.  Mildly annoyed that he had to leave his home in sanctuary, but at least the empire matches his colour pallette

Moonzy - citizen

Jonah - citizen - served Glimmer Grove before it fell, is at the forefront of the campaign to get it back to its former glory under princess Katherine

Megan - inhabitant

Dawn:

Gem - princess - fae of some sort

Fruitlegs - citizen - bard

Ponk - citizen - lighthouse keeper

Tubbo - citizen - bee boi

Techno - citizen - oversees the food production and makes sure everyone has enough and works out how much they can sell/export that week.

Welsknight - on Gems Council, in charge of defence against the deep dark

TFC - inhabitant - by proxy, lives in the ancient city and fixes the messes left when players visit. Sculk-grandad. Actually hes literally the opposite of Dawn, lives underground constantly. Warren of tunnels extends underneath all empires but people who try to explore them get lost. Nobody's died there yet bc TFC put a ward on the exits to draw people toward them and not the ancient city

BigB - citizen - baker, he makes bread and cookies from the farm produce

Stratos:

(Extra note here: citizen is someone who has been in the empire since it was founded about a hundred years ago when joel was exiled and/or has grown up there since. Inhabitant is someone who's come more recently from another empire)

Joel - an exiled god - adamant he is still his tall powerful self. Regarded as the leader of the empire nonetheless. People moved under his islands originally to be a part of the 'great god's empire' but a lot of them stayed even when they realised he was a wet rag/affectionate

Foolish and Jr and Finley - citizens - Foosh is an architect who helps Joel. He chose to live in the mortal realm but moved to Stratos when he heard about Joel's exile because he can sympathise with not living in the god's realm and wanted to help out. Hermes ends up playing with Jr and Finley when Joel's busy building

Eret - citizen - was one of the original settlers but somehow is still alive a hundred years later.... oh well, they knew living near a god would have its benefits

Grian - inhabitant - creator of the entity? check. vaguely eldrich horror? check. Was exiled? (very heavily encouraged to leave his hometown) after the entity ate someone by accident, and then he ended up here? Check.

Bdubs - citizen - look into those eyes and tell me he wouldnt fit right in with joels build style. He made a monolith, hed be a great addition

Callahan - citizen - maintains the temples to joel

Thanks to @scribbling-dragon for some of the suggestions!

Keralis - citizen - have you seen him?

Edit: OLI DO BE A BARD :D uhh if he makes an empire ill do a bit of rejigging and move ppl around but until then the skrunkly is just a wanderer

Phew done! :D

[peakdeer]

Evermoore Rejects - Chapter 1

So you know that au I've been talking about? Yeah. I'm making a fic out of it. I'm kind of unreasonably proud of this first chapter, I think it turned out quite well!

Sausage huffed, crossing his arms. He was a great witch! Or warlock, or sorcerer, or whatever the proper term was. He knew it wasn’t wizard, at least, and that’s what mattered, wasn’t it? Okay so- maybe he had some issues with magic, but… he was trying! He was! He was studying the books religiously and practicing very hard! They just… hadn’t seen that. And now he was a on a train to the worst station to be a resident witch at, with the worryingly likely possibility of being banned from practicing magic ever again.

He had to succeed.

He swallowed, suddenly aware of the burning in his eyes that warned of tears. He would not cry. Not here, at least, not in front of the other witch. He sulkily glared up at the other witch, who didn’t seem to notice. She had a classy purple shirt with ruffles on the ends of her sleeves, complimented nicely by her green work overalls. The pink flowers added to her overall vibe, creating a spark of color in contrast to her tall black leather boots. In retrospect, he probably shouldn’t glare at her. Firstly, because it was rude, but secondly, because she was on the same train as he was. She had the same ticket, the same sad aura, and the same destination. Which meant that he and her would be stuck together for quite a while, and he’d rather not have a rivalry with his best chance at a friend. He should… he should probably say hello, shouldn’t he?

Shelby absentmindedly swung her legs, keeping her head tilted downwards. This was her last chance. Her last chance to prove that she could be a good witch. That they should let her keep practicing magic. Her last chance to succeed, to fulfill her wishes, to follow her dreams, to achieve anything at all.

She had to succeed.

And that started with the Evermoore. The swampy land of toads and frogs and mud, of mobs and low hanging vines and fog that creeped along and obscured your vision. Did she mention the mud? Somehow she doubted her leather boots would protect her from the thick mud of the mangrove. But, she had to try. That was where she’d been assigned; that was the place her ticket led to. She could do it, though. She would do it. She would prove her worth to all of the other witches. Speaking of other witches, there was another one here on the train. He looked as unhappy to be here as she did, trembling arms crossed over his teal blue corset and watery storm-blue eyes. His corset was gold along the strings and fringes, and was complemented well by his brown leather boots and gloves. The gloves extended almost to elbow-length and had a pretty sky-blue chalcedony stone on the back of the gloves. He also had a sterling silver arm guard on his right arm, right above his glove. There was a rather large smooth jade stone located in the center of his arm guard. He had brown leather boots with a strip of a rougher gray hide for the toe and heel. It was clearly from some magical beast, though not one that she had encountered. Perhaps… ravager hide? The rock in her stomach plummeted, making her feel slightly queasy. To have access to something like that, he must be quite well-off. Not only would she have to deal with a presumptuous noble who was good at magic and would likely look down at her pitiful attempts at magic, she realized that the academy had likely sent him as a babysitter to watch over her and regulate her attempts at magic. She wasn’t that bad! She could do it herself, she could!

She was so caught up in her mini panic-attack that she entirely missed whatever it was that the other man said. To add to her embarrassment, he had to wave his hand in front of her face to get her attention. “Uh, hello?” He asked with a surprisingly friendly, albeit a bit nervous, smile. “I figured that,  since you’re also a witch, and we’ve got the same ticket, I should probably say hello? Since we’re gonna both be stuck in the Evermoore? And we should probably be on good terms? But if you don’t wanna talk that’s fine, you’re probably busy, oh, did I interrupt your concentration? I’m s- oh my goodness, I’m rambling. Sorry.” He said sheepishly. She simply sat there for a second, staring at the man. His honestly endearing rambling was so far from the snobby noble she thought he would be that it was giving her whiplash. It took her entirely too long to realize that she hadn’t said anything and was probably giving the poor guy anxiety. “Oh! Hello! Sorry I was thinking thoughts to myself and kinda spacing out so I wasn’t paying attention, but hello! It’s nice to meet you! I’m Shelby!” She exclaimed enthusiastically, holding a hand out as a greeting. The second she did, she immediately began worrying that he wasn’t going to shake her hand, oh stars she messed up didn’t she- but then he reached out with a friendly smile to grasp her hand, beaming brightly at her.

“That’s alright, I do that too sometimes. I’m very glad you’re friendly, I was kind of worried I’d be stuck in the Evermoore with an someone who hated me. Oh! I’m Sausage, by the way. Terrible name, I know, no idea why my parents chose it.” He explained animatedly. The more he talked the more at ease Shelby was. It was hard to feel threatened by this smiling witch.

“Doesn’t sound terrible compared to some of the names I’ve heard. Magical people seem to have lost the naming gene,” She joked. She added more seriously, “It’s nice to see you’re friendly as well! You look like a noble so I was worried you’d be stuck up and presumptuous, but I’m glad to see that you’re not at  all!”

“Yeah, I technically am a noble? I guess? But a pretty disgraced one, if you ask me. I mean, what kind of magical noble gets into a fancy-shmancy school and then pretty much fails out of it?” He joked, though his eyes were downcast.

“Well, if it’s any consolation, I nearly failed out as well,” She offered. “We can be screw-ups together!”

“Yeah! It’d be great to have a new friend,” He remarked gleefully, eyes gleaming with unmasked joy.

She felt her mood brighten, and she doubted it was just from the chalcedony. She’d made a new friend! Her first friend, on the cusp of a new adventure and a new leaf. Maybe this wouldn’t be so terrible after all.

[spacetrashpile]

ooooooooooooooh you wanna talk abt how s2 of empires is haunted by s1 soooooooooo badddddddddddd -your good friend ostinato who is still thinking about your tags on its post <3 (bullies you (affectionate))

ok so the first thing you need to know me is that i love when things are haunted and i love ghosts and i love haunted houses. this is a vital thing for understanding me and how i analyze media, and empires allows me to be awful about this exact topic in such a perfect way.

first of all, sausage. i feel like i don’t need to elaborate on sausage, but i will anyways.

not only is his goddess what became of his dead best friend, not only is he literally haunted by wither roses and the long dead friends who come with them, not only is the half of himself he left behind a thousand years ago crawling out of their grave to kill him, NOT ONLY ALL THAT! but he’s made friends with people who are horribly reminiscent of every long gone friend. they share names. some of them share faces. some of them share personalities. none of them share memories. he’s watching the ghosts of his friends walk around, alive, like they never died, because none of them have any way to know. it’s almost like sausage is still dead, like he’s the ghost haunting all of them, unable to move on.

second, we've got to talk about the ancient capital.

pix literally lives in the remains of a long dead city, empty of all but himself. he resurrected extinct animals to keep him company. he maintains the mausoleum of a man who died a thousand years ago, with a mural of a goddess few seem able to name, where he dug up another long dead king, expecting a skeleton and finding a man. and then more recently, pushing aside the mural and finding an artifact 1,000 years gone. all pix seems to know about it is the rules, not what came of it. it holds a story, of where it was when the rapture occurred. how did the crown find its way from the smoking ruins of the grimlands to here? maybe we’ll never know, but here it is. reminding us all of the long dead rulers who once wore it.

i started writing the pix section last night and now today, pix is literally a ghost. no one lives in the ancient capital but ghosts.

third, the evermoore.

shubble is quite literally haunted by ghosts of the past. the gnomes, eradicated by xornoth, haunt her home, stealing souls and whispering from the dark, and she’s giving them new life. shubble is restoring the forest of the gnomes to it’s former glory, giving them a chance at the lives that were cut short.

when the gnomes look at her, all they can see their daughter who made it out. do you think that’s why the evermoore welcomed her in the first place? because the ghosts so desperately hoped she was their long lost child, their one escapee? how long did they believe it could be her? did they know immediately? or did they hold onto hope until she asked the air, asked them, who’s shrub? how do you live like that? you’re the ghosts haunting her house and she’s the ghost haunting yours, and she doesn’t even know it.

fourth, joel’s whole deal.

joel’s building monuments to long dead gods who’s names he doesn’t even remember. he just has vague memories of the people who used to be his friends, his family, and he’s building monuments and sending prayers to gods who will never hear.

there’s more i could say here and i know it, but that’s all that’s coming to mind right now, so we’ll stop here and probably come back to elaborate later, lol.

[a-d-n-d-journal]

Game Session #20

Characters:

Rysiel "Riceboy", half-elf druid (Circle of the Moon)

Zastu, dragonborn rogue (Thief)

Mirri in the wind, tabaxi bard (College of Worship)

Kix, changeling rogue (Arcane Trickster)

Jimothy Smones, human ranger (guest player)

NPCs:

Tamalin Zoar , ~60yrs female human; runs the inn around which the small village Calling Horns rose

Darvin Buckman, ~40s male human, one of the caravan leaders

Writing this a month after the actual game... We had a visitor this session! A ranger named "Jimothy Smones" met the players at a crossroads inn. Mirri's player came over for the online session, while "Jimothy" and Zastu joined Kix and Rysiel.

This session resumes a battle already a couple rounds in. The four adventurers are still drunk from their rowdy night at the inn, and have disadvantage on their attacks because of it. Kix and Zastu have bardic inspiration though, and Rysiel has transformed into a dire wolf--which has pack tactics, an ability that effectively cancels out the disadvantage if an ally is nearby (which Kix is)

Rysiel and Kix are outside, attacking two trolls who are trying to claw their way into the stables, while Zastu tries stabbing the two monsters with her sword. Mirri is casting spells to help. A ranger is awoken by the commotion, and quickly makes his way to the stables. He sees what Mirri and Zastu are doing, and spends a couple rounds making his way around the inn to join the fight close-up. The man is Jimothy Smones, and he knows a lot about trolls. They regenerate, so hit them with fire! Rysiel transforms back into a person and conjures up a blade of pure fire, landing several hits before the trolls gang up on him. Meanwhile. Mirri casts a thunderstorm spell that rains down lightning every round as they direct.

Soon the fight is over. The trolls are dead and burning. Kix stabilizes Rysiel, until Zastu comes outside and revives him. As the five of them return to the inn, the proprietor (Tamalin Zoar) bumps into them on her way to deal with the issue they just solved... Obviously they are no mere travelers, so she invites them back to the bar, where she opens a good bottle of wine and explains the situation. Trolls live in the Evermoors, a couple days north of here, but usually they stay there. They’ve been encroaching more and more on this little village (Calling Horns) and the surrounding homesteads for a couple weeks now, and she wants them to find out why. They’ve had problems like this before (and with bandits)--hence the guards she employs, and demands for tithes to support--but not like this. It’s taking all her resources just to keep people safe-ish, and she can’t afford to send anyone to investigate. There’s a letter of recommendation to “important people” in Yartar or Everlund if they take up the quest. They say they’ll think about it, then head to bed. Or at least, four of them do. Kix slinks around a bit when the guards and militia return. He had planned on raiding the liquour, but this may do as well... Tamalin is chewing them out for not protecting the inn and stables, but in their defense, there were trolls also attacking people’s homes, and they had to deal with that. Okay, maybe that wasn’t as interesting as Kix had hoped, but at least it underlines the problem.

The adventurers enjoy a free breakfast with Jimothy, as reward for killing the trolls. There’s something weird about the eggs though, and Kix doesn’t believe the woman who served them that they are perfectly normal chicken eggs. He sneaks around a bit, trying to get into the kitchen, but people are going in and out of there constantly. Eventually he ends up outside, peering into the window. He sees a cooking bin full of the scrambled eggs that they had been eating--seems the cooks make them enmasse instead of individually. The rogue uses his arcane abilities to float an invisible mage hand in the kitchen, moving things around subtly, until he finds a rubbish bin with egg shells in it. He’s just lifting some perfectly normal chicken’s egg shells in midair when the woman standing there shrieks and hits them with a fry pan. Disappointed, Kix returns to the eating area.

Meanwhile, Jimothy also sneaks out and returns to the site of the troll attack. The bodies have been removed, leaving dirt and grass soaked with black icor-like blood. The hole in the stable hasn’t been patched yet. Trolls (and other giants) are his sworn enemy, so he decides to get a head start on tracking these ones down. His years of doing this exact thing pay off--he follows their path to the north, toward the Evermoors...

To be continued...

p.s. the eggs were scrambled with sheep's milk instead of cow; that's what was weird about them ;p

[killmebythebeach]

Oli is in a snivily cage, imprisoned for his crimes of afterlife.

Love that trope of "Oh my gosh [horrific event]" "wait, does that mean [selfish arbitrary thing that happens to come out of it]?" Anyway Oli won afterlife I will hear nothing of it

It pained my heart that he terrorized Gem's village. Just a little.

I'm SO PISSED he didn't make more afterlife vids fucker got the VAMPIRE origin and that was the ONE original I wanted to see make a reappearance (maybe he streamed it though idk)

HE GOT STUCK ON LIZZIE'S ENIGMA MACHINE THAT TRAPPED JOEL SGJKVD.

Is he an angel when he's trying to bring Sausage back? If so: what the hell is that skin. Also he's lonely :( Oli plays off desperate loneliness well (edit: he's birb)

PEARL HAS HER DOOR NO ONE COULD FIGURE OUT HOW TO OPEN SGKNDSJK also WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?!

I also love that this probably means Pearl was a god this whole time or she became god after dying. So a) Xornoth seeing god and going "Yeah ill terrorize that" or b) Pearl becoming god and deciding to go to Scott's perfect little afterlife to cause havoc

FIGHTING FARMER QUEEN SHE STILL IS A FIGHTER WE WIN THEEEEESE anyway fucked up god "just sleeeeeping" Pearl my beloved hope she makes more appearances. She really went "No <3" and then iseakied him.

Very glad afterlife Oli is empires Oli btw. I want him to join the stratosphere war so bad. "I don't know how many lives I've got left!" Ooooh

Glad he used the actual empires map I think. Also is he always in a Hawaiian shirt or is that new?

. Did he refer to himself as goated with the sauce.

THE EVERMOORE?! DOESNT LIKE HIM?! Like I know everyone is warned of the fog but a FROG?!

Oli gets the monster hunter achievement when he kills that pillaged at spawn. How is this man alive.

Is Oli like. Well?

Skrunkly.

WHAT KIND OF FUCKING RAVINE IS THAT?! WHY DOES IT GO ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE DEEP DARK?!

Once again. Is Oli okay? Like.

I'm pretty sure while he's talking about people drawing him he's taking jab at Joel, which is always welcome.

WHY IS THERE THERE A MUSIC NUMBER LIKE ITSLL PROBABLY BE AMAZING BUT OLI.

Everyone: oh my gosh! What happened to the dragon?!

Oli: *speed running music*

^ this is what I've gathered from this part so part

Idk who Zeuz is but he's funky. I want to make a cool guardian design of him and Oli. I feel like I'm watching the sage in an 80s fantasy movie with puppets watch an anime protag.

... I like the strider.

"I've pearled before-" everybody! Enderrail.... ENDERRAIL... ENDERRAIL!!!

"I'm gonna take you to BED. BATH. AND! BEYOND!" I have to encorperate that into my daily phrases. Oh yeah, the egg.

Friendly reminder: the first episode was a whole server event where everyone went to the end and saw the egg and dragon gone. Oli is gonna lore something... I feel it in my bones.

PIX'S BRIDGE!!!

Hc that Oli was in the credits for hundreds of years and that's why he never ran into anyone (ignore that he ran into spawn campfire before killing the dragon)

Oli on his racoon Tommy arc. This makes Gem Techno and I find that hilarious she should kill people. Wisps for the Wisp god or something idk haven't been here in a while

I don't know why I didn't notice Oli had a good voice? Also Gem walking up the stairs during that is peak comedy

Probably nothing (maybe it's like a setting or smth to turn off achievements) but Gem didn't get the achievement for picking up the egg

Also ??? Did Gem break that block under him?! Is he in Fwhip's place or elsewhere or ???

Okay question answered however Fwhip what the fuck. Really hoped Gem and Fwhip teamed up for that one. Also is the Sheriff just. Taking prisoners?

Idk I don't do live blogging but this was a special occasion.

[a-d-n-d-journal]

Game Session #16

Characters:

Mirri in the wind, tabaxi bard

Rysiel "Riceboy", half-elf druid (Circle of the Moon)

Zastu, dragonborn rogue (Thief)

Kix, changeling rogue (Arcane Trickster)

Noteable NPCs...

Sydiri Haunlar, human (Chondathan) fighter; RIP

Darathra Shendrel, human; Lord protector of Triboar

Narth Tezrin and Alaestra Ulgar, humans; Own and run the Lion's Share trading store

Darz Helgar, human; Groundskeeper for the two large caravan camps in Triboar; squirrelly

Urgala Meltimer, human; ex-adventurer and owner of the Northshield House (inn); her late wife died during an adventure

Ghelryn Foehammer, dwarf; master armorsmith, claim to fame is fashioning armor for the king and queen

Othovir, human; runs a harness workshop, has impeccible work; apparently a mage

Urlam Stockpool, human; owner of the Triboar Travellers, a caravan escort company; dresses very well and sports a bright red eye patch with the Zhentarim winged serpent

Valken Naspeer, half-elf; Urlam's friend and body guard; dresses almost as suave as Urlam, his posture suggests that he's very dangerous.

Nemyth, tiefling; owner and proprieter of the Triboar Arms tavern

Jacoby and Persson Hysstryn, humans; two brothers who are looking for their long-lost brother, Mirak

Silvarren Loomshank, human; disgraced cleric of Helm

Kaelen Sarssir, human; owner of the Talking Troll tavern

Tolmara Hysstryn; Mirak's widow and owner of the Six Windows rooming house

I’m writing this one weeks and weeks after the fact, so my memory is definitely rusty...

The epic, multi-game battle concluded during this session! Yay! The party helps deal with the massive fires that the magmins started, and then get up to their usual shenanigans.

Zastu helps split the party >:( by becoming suspicious of newcomer "Kix", and sends him/them on an errand to see why two brothers wanted to talk to the Lord Protector, Darathra. The stealthy changeling rogue follows the pair through the busy market square and to a dive bar not far away. He arrives inside only a few minutes after them, but they are already deep in their cups. The place is sparsely populated, but the few patrons are the kind of rowdy drunks you wouldn’t want elsewhere. Despite this, the two brothers can be heard complaining that the ‘Lord Protector’ will not help them find their brother, who has been missing for ten years. During an amusing conversation, it comes out that they’re convinced he hasn’t left town, due to the words of this here cleric... They gesture to a man in robes who is passed-out at their table. Kix agrees to help them out, for which they tell say they will reward the rogue ‘definitely’ (they have an heirloom or something, it’s vague because they are drunk). Eventually the cleric wakes up and heads to the loo, where he has a very awkward conversation with Kix while trying to pee. They talk a bit more inside (Kix changes faces at some point, but it’s unclear when), but it becomes clear that the cleric doesn’t know that they want, and Kix isn’t sure how to get it out of him. He leaves to get Mirri, hoping another cleric will have more insight.

Meanwhile, the remaining three go talk to Darathra about the giant attack. She's grateful for the help defending the town, but admits that she's in a difficult position in light of the news that they're all theives. She basically threatens to put them in jail if they don’t take this silver boar medallion to her compatriot in Everlund--several weeks’ dangerous journey along the Evermoor way. She’s a member of the Harpers, a secret network of goodly spies and magic-users who have helped keep the peace on the Sword Coast for centuries. She’s worried about how giants could have come this far into the Dessarin Valley without any word. She notices the stink-eye that Zastu is giving her. “Just so you know... If I go missing... You will be hunted down, so don’t think about it.” “So you’re accusing us of being murderers now?” Zastu asks, incredulous. Darathra shrugs and sighs. “I don’t know what you’re capable of, or what you’re willing to do. If I knew you were thieves, I wouldn’t have let you stay here. I specifically told you to stay out of trouble. (this is the frontier, and keeping order is paramount) I have put in people behind bars for less... The only reason you’re not in jail now is that you saved this town, and my life specifically.” ...it’s an intense encounter. When they leave, they nearly leave the silver boar icon behind, but something tells them they’re going to need it later.