#This is the cursed ship but every day I get closer to really wanting this

[svt-luna]

𝜗℘ IF ONLY

synopsis: A moment of vulnerability, a confession left unanswered, and a heart quietly breaking— If only things had gone differently, but some stories take time to unfold.

warnings: cursing, crying, misunderstanding, drinking, angst, drunk confessions, rejection, sad!Luna, confused!Jeonghan, heartaches, talks about embracing the pain, unrequited love (?), a somewhat hopeful ending

surprise! my first ever one-shot in the Luna-verse, I really hope you guys like it! Also… I am so sorry for making this sad and angsty. A lot of you have been asking me about how Jeonghan rejected Luna ever since I posted the Group Ships… so here it is, but I promise it gets better from here. Luna and Jeonghan’s story is very very interesting so keep a lookout on that 🤍 (p.s. I made myself cry writing this.)

╰ ౨ৎ LUNA-VERSE MASTERLIST ╰ ౨ৎ writings masterlist

If only she wasn’t the way she was, that is what Luna thought growing up.

Luna had always found it difficult to make friends. From a young age, she was used to the way people looked at her— peers who seemed to keep their distance, children her age who were either too intimidated by her or too quick to judge. The few times she had tried to approach someone, their hesitation or outright dismissal had stung.

But with time, Luna learned to accept it. She carried herself with an air of quiet confidence, convincing herself that she didn’t need to fit in with the rest. Even as a child, she’d find comfort in the quiet, the solitude that followed her like a shadow.

That sense of isolation followed her into her teenage years, long after she had moved back to Korea to chase her dream of becoming an idol. At just fourteen, she had thrown herself into a world where competition was everything.

It was hard enough to adjust to the grueling training regimen, but there was something even more challenging— forming connections.

Surrounded by other trainees, Luna had hoped that maybe here, in the shared space of hard work and ambition, she would finally find people who understood her.

Instead, the distance only grew.

The girls she trained with didn’t just avoid her because of her looks. They avoided her because of her talent, her skill, and her determination.

Luna was better than them, and they knew it.

Every time she entered the practice room, Luna could feel the stares. Her sharp movements and flawless execution stood out, but not in the way she had hoped. It didn’t make people want to get closer to her. It made them wary as if they were afraid her presence alone was a threat.

Luna never intended to intimidate anyone; she simply wanted to do her best. But no matter how hard she worked, it seemed to push people further away.

Luna had taken it as a compliment as she got older. But back then, it was suffocating, watching the others group together while she was always left on the sidelines, untouchable, unapproachable.

If only she could have done something differently.

If only people could see beyond her cold exterior.

If only people weren't so quick to judge.

As she grew older, she tried to find some comfort in the idea that perhaps this distance was a compliment. If they were intimidated, it meant they saw her as someone to be taken seriously, someone skilled enough to be a rival. And rivals didn’t need to be friends, right?

But even as she told herself this, the isolation lingered. There were times when the silence became suffocating, and she wondered if anyone would ever approach her without that look in their eyes.

No one ever did.

Not until Jeonghan.

She remembered the first time they met vividly like it was etched into her mind.

It was her first day at PLEDIS after she had transferred from YG Entertainment. She had expected it to be just like the others— people watching her from a distance, maybe a polite nod or two but no real effort to get to know her.

But Jeonghan had been different from the start.

While the other trainees kept to their familiar circles, glancing at her curiously but saying nothing, Jeonghan had walked right up to her. His messy swept hair was already growing since then, and there was a smile on his face— easy and warm as if they had known each other for years.

“Hi,” he had said, extending his hand to her. “I’m Jeonghan. What’s your name?” he’d said with a casual smile like it was the most natural thing in the world. His warmth disarmed her and made her wonder why he didn’t hesitate like the others.

Luna had blinked, momentarily stunned by his straightforwardness. She had been so used to people shying away from her that for a second, she didn’t know how to respond.

“I... I’m Jiyeon,” she had managed to say, her voice uncharacteristically small. “Or Luna… you can also call me Luna.”

“Jiyeon or Luna,” Jeonghan repeated, his smile widening. “Welcome. If you need anything, just let me know.”

That was it. No fanfare, no awkward small talk— just a simple greeting, but it had meant the world to her.

It still does.

Jeonghan was the first person to make her feel like she wasn’t an outsider in the cutthroat world of trainee life. From that moment on, he became a constant presence in her life.

He became her first friend within the company and her first proper friend ever. The one who cheered her on during monthly evaluations when no one else would.

His voice would always rise above the whispers of competition, “You’ve got this, Nana-ya!” he’d say, his voice full of encouragement.

And when she did well— when she ranked first during one of the most intense evaluations— it was Jeonghan who was the first to congratulate her, beaming with pride as if her success was his own.

If only she had realized back then just how important he’d become to her.

Jeonghan became her anchor, the one person she could count on when the loneliness threatened to overwhelm her. He was the first one to truly see her—not just as another trainee, but as someone worth knowing.

Jeonghan was her first friend, her first best friend, but he was also the first guy she ever liked.

As time passed, it became clearer. Jeonghan wasn’t just a friend to her. Luna didn’t know when it had happened exactly, but one day, she realized that her feelings for Jeonghan had shifted.

It wasn’t a loud, thunderous realization. It crept in like a slow sunrise, soft and warm.

His easy smiles, the way his hair would fall into his eyes, the effortless kindness he showed not only her but everyone around him. It was the way her heart would flutter when he smiled at her, the way she would find herself glancing at him in the practice room, admiring his soft features, the way he moved with effortless grace… it all felt different.

It made her heart ache, a tender pull that grew with every interaction.

Jeonghan wasn’t just her best friend— he was someone she cared about, someone who had become more important to her than she had ever anticipated.

It started innocently enough, a soft crush that lingered in the back of her mind, growing stronger with every passing day.

Back then, Luna had convinced herself it was just admiration. After all, Jeonghan was everything she wasn’t— outgoing, charming, and effortlessly kind. He had a way of making everyone feel comfortable, and for someone like Luna, who had always been hard to approach, that was something she admired.

But it wasn’t just admiration. She knew that deep down.

If only she could stop herself from liking her best friend.

It terrified her.

Cause just like every first crush, it came with fear.

Fear that he wouldn’t see her the same way.

Fear that their dynamic would change, and the closeness she cherished would slip away.

As a trainee, Luna had done her best to suppress those feelings. She’d bury herself in practice, pushing herself harder and harder, hoping the exhaustion would numb whatever emotions were swirling inside her.

But Jeonghan always seemed to break through that wall. He was the one who encouraged her when she doubted herself, the one who praised her when she felt like she wasn’t good enough, and the one who always made sure she never felt alone.

He had this way of showing up exactly when she needed someone, even when she hadn’t realized she needed anyone at all.

If only it were simple.

If only her heart didn’t race every time he smiled at her during practice, or when he pulled her aside after evaluations just to tell her how well she’d done.

If only she could keep it all together like she wanted to. But every time they stood next to each other on stage, every time they shared a laugh behind the scenes, every time he gave her that gentle, knowing look that only he could, her feelings for him grew stronger, despite how desperately she tried to push them away.

And yet, she knew she couldn’t say anything.

From their trainee days to their debut, Luna kept those feelings locked inside. She’d convinced herself it was better that way. After all, they were in the same group now. They were members of SEVENTEEN, a team. If anything were to happen, if her feelings were ever discovered, it could ruin everything they had worked so hard for.

The thought of jeopardizing that terrified her. That is the last thing she wanted was to complicate things—for herself, for Jeonghan, or the group.

So, for years, Luna held back.

She smiled when Jeonghan smiled at her, laughed when he teased her during practice and pretended it didn’t hurt when he leaned a little too close to one of their other members, playfully tugging on their sleeves the same way he did with her.

Luna tried to delude herself into thinking that her feelings would fade sooner or later.

If only it did.

The feelings persisted, gnawing at her every time they shared a moment. And as much as she tried to hide it, there was no denying the truth: she had hard fallen for him.

Soon, she had become a master of hiding her emotions, of keeping her heart carefully tucked away.

By 2017, she had gotten so good at it that even she almost believed she didn’t care anymore.

Almost.

But it all came crashing down one late night in June, in the quiet of their shared dorm floor. The group had just come home from a long day, having performed at ‘Music Bank’, and the exhaustion clung to them like a heavy fog.

But for Luna and Jeonghan, the night was far from over. It had become their little routine— after a long day, after all the noise and chaos of performing and smiling for the cameras, they would retreat to either Jeonghan or Luna's place, pour a few drinks, and talk.

Tonight was no different.

The apartment was dimly lit, casting a soft glow around the living room where they sat on the floor, leaning against the couch, with half-empty glasses between them. The curtains were drawn shut, blocking out the city lights, and the only sound was the low hum of the air conditioner and the occasional clink of their glasses as they took small sips.

The rest of the members were asleep or off doing their own thing, leaving Luna and Jeonghan in their own little bubble, just as they always had been.

Jeonghan had been talking about something— Luna wasn’t sure what exactly, her mind was too clouded with the effects of the alcohol and the way he was looking at her, that soft, knowing gaze he always gave her when he thought she was overdoing it. His now blonde hair, now tousled from the day, framed his face as he watched her with that same concerned look he always gave her whenever they drank together.

“You’re going to regret this tomorrow, you know,” Jeonghan said, his voice soft but amused. He leaned forward, reaching for her glass as if to take it from her, but Luna pulled it back with a childish pout, cradling it against her chest.

“I’m fine,” she whined, her words slightly slurred, but playful. She leaned back against the couch, closing her eyes for a moment before glancing at him with a half-smile. “We are so busy nowadays that we never get to just… talk anymore. I miss this.”

Jeonghan chuckled softly, shaking his head. “We’re talking now, aren’t we?”

Luna nodded, her gaze drifting to the ceiling. The room felt heavy with unsaid words, with all the things she’d been holding back for years. And yet, there he was, sitting across from her, calm, composed, completely unaware of the storm raging inside her.

He was so infuriatingly perfect— always knowing what to say, how to make her feel safe, how to make her laugh, how to keep her at a distance just enough that she could never cross that line.

Jeonghan shifted beside her, his arm brushing against hers as he reached for her glass again, gently prying it from her hands this time.

“Nana-ya, you’ll get hungover if you keep this up,” he said, his tone more serious now. His fingers brushed hers as he took the glass, setting it aside, and she hated how even that small touch made her heart race.

If only if her heart stopped doing that.

“I don’t care,” Luna murmured, the alcohol loosening her tongue more than she realized. She slumped further into the couch, her legs stretching out in front of her, her head turning to rest on the cushion behind her.

She watched as Jeonghan stood up, stretching his arms over his head before leaning down to gently take her hand, pulling her up with him.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed,” he said softly, his voice low and soothing as he gently tugged her toward her bedroom.

“I’m not tired,” Luna whined again, stumbling slightly as she followed him, her body swaying from the alcohol.

She felt warm all over, not just from the drinks, but from the way Jeonghan was guiding her with such care, as if she were fragile, something to be protected. His hand was steady, firm but gentle as it held hers, and Luna found herself hating it. Hating how easy it was for him to be like this. How perfect he was.

“We can talk more in the morning. You need to rest.” Jeonghan said, his voice soft but insistent. He led her into her bedroom, helping her sit down on the edge of the bed.

Luna shook her head, her vision blurring slightly as she stared up at him. “You’re too good to me, Hannie,” she mumbled, her words tumbling out without her even realizing it. “You’re… too perfect, it’s annoying.”

Jeonghan paused, crouching down in front of her, his hands resting lightly on her knees as he looked up at her with that same gentle smile. “What are you talking about?” he asked softly, brushing a stray strand of hair away from her face

Luna's heart clenched. She hated it. Hated how effortlessly he could make her feel like this.

“You make me feel things,” she whispered, her voice barely audible. “And I hate it.”

Jeonghan blinked, his smile faltering slightly, but before he could say anything, Luna let out a frustrated sigh, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his shoulder. He stayed quiet, his hands gently resting on her back, his touch light, almost hesitant. He didn’t say anything, didn’t push her away, didn’t ask her to explain. He just stayed there, holding her, letting her lean on him as the weight of her words hung in the air between them.

“You’re too perfect,” she repeated, her voice muffled against his shirt. “And I hate it. I hate that you make me feel this way.”

Jeonghan's brows furrowed as he heard her words, the frustration lacing her voice, and something in his chest tightened.

He had a feeling he understood what she meant— he wasn’t oblivious, after all. He’d seen the little signs, the lingering glances, the way her gaze softened whenever he was near. But even with that knowledge, there was a part of him that needed to hear her say it outright. To confirm what he had long suspected but never dared to address.

“What do you mean?” he asked softly, his voice gentle but probing, hoping she would clarify even though he already had an inkling.

Jeonghan’s heart beat a little faster, anxiety swirling in his chest. He didn’t move, his hands still resting lightly on her back, his fingers brushing against the fabric of her shirt. He could feel the heat radiating off her body, the weight of her leaning against him.

Luna pulled back slightly, just enough to look him in the eyes, her expression a mix of frustration and something else— something raw, something vulnerable.

“I hate you,” she muttered, her words slurred but filled with emotion. “I hate that you make me feel like this.”

Jeonghan blinked, momentarily taken aback by the bluntness of her statement. “What do you mean ‘feel like this’?” he asked again, his voice quieter now, a little more uncertain.

Jeonghan knew, of course, he knew, but hearing her say it— he needed that.

Luna huffed, her frustration growing as she ran a hand through her hair, tugging at the strands as if trying to pull herself together.

“Since we were trainees, Yoon Jeonghan,” she said, her voice rising just slightly, her words tumbling out faster now as if she couldn’t stop them. “You were always so... nice to me. Too nice. And you were always there, cheering me on, helping me, making me feel like I wasn’t alone. You made me feel so pretty… so loved… so feel special.”

Jeonghan swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. He listened, his heart pounding in his chest as she continued.

“And I hated it. I hated how much I needed that. I hated that every time you smiled at me, I felt something. Something I wasn’t supposed to feel.” Luna’s voice cracked, her frustration turning into something more fragile, more pained. “It’s been the same since we were trainees. And even now... even now, you’re still making me feel this way. And I don’t know what to do with it anymore.”

Jeonghan stayed silent, his mind racing. He could feel the weight of her words sinking in, each one hitting him like a stone, and yet... it wasn’t surprising. Not really.

Jeonghan was good at reading people, he had always sensed it— this undercurrent between them, something deeper than friendship, something unspoken that lingered in the spaces between their interactions. But hearing her admit it, hearing the depth of her frustration, her hurt... it made his chest ache in a way he hadn’t anticipated.

“Jiyeon-ah...” he started, his voice soft, but before he could say anything more, Luna slumped forward, her body going limp as the alcohol finally took over. She had passed out, her breathing evening out as she leaned against his chest.

Jeonghan froze for a moment, blinking down at her in surprise. His heart was still racing, his mind spinning with everything she had just said, but as he looked at her now, so peaceful in her sleep, all that frustration and pain gone from her face, he felt a wave of tenderness wash over him.

She looked so fragile in that moment, so vulnerable, and it made something deep inside him stir. He didn’t move right away. Instead, he sat there for a few minutes, watching her, his hand lightly brushing the hair away from her face as she slept. His heart ached for her, for the weight she had been carrying for so long, for the feelings she had kept hidden all these years.

If only things had been different.

If only he had realized sooner.

Jeonghan let out a soft sigh, his fingers trailing through her hair one last time before he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. It was light, barely there, but it was all he could offer at that moment.

“Goodnight, pretty angel,” he whispered, his voice barely audible as he slowly pulled away.

He stood up, carefully laying her down on the bed and pulling the covers over her, making sure she was comfortable before stepping back. He glanced around the room, his gaze falling on the mess they had left behind in the living room— the half-empty glasses, the bottle of soju, the scattered snacks. With one last look at Luna, he quietly left the room, closing the door behind him.

Jeonghan made his way back to the living room, his mind still spinning from everything that had happened. He cleaned up in silence, his movements slow and methodical as he cleared the table, washed the glasses, and wiped down the counter. His thoughts kept drifting back to her words, the way she had looked at him, the raw emotion in her voice.

By the time he finished cleaning, the apartment was quiet again, the night settling in around him. He stood in the middle of the room for a moment, his hands resting on the back of the couch as he stared at the empty space where Luna had been sitting earlier.

If only he had known earlier.

If only things were simpler.

The next morning, Luna woke up with a pounding headache and three immediate regrets.

If only she didn’t remember what she said to Jeonghan last night.

If only she hadn’t drank so much.

If only she drank more— enough to forget.

But she remembered everything. Every. Single. Thing. And she knew, with a sickening certainty, that Jeonghan did too.

Luna stayed in bed longer than she should’ve, staring up at the ceiling as her mind replayed the previous night’s events on an unrelenting loop. The hazy confession, the way her voice had trembled when she told him she hated how he made her feel—her heart sank deeper with each flash of memory.

She squeezed her eyes shut, willing herself to forget, but it was useless. The image of Jeonghan’s face, so soft and caring as she spilled her heart, refused to leave her mind.

Her schedule wouldn’t let her wallow in bed, though. Today was packed with activities: music shows, interviews, rehearsals, variety show tapings, and a radio appearance in the evening.

All of them required her to see Jeonghan.

Dragging herself out of bed, Luna’s stomach twisted at the thought of facing him. How was she supposed to look him in the eye after what she said?

She could still feel the weight of his gaze from the night before, the warmth of his hands guiding her to bed, the way his lips had brushed her forehead so tenderly. Her heart beat faster just thinking about it, but now all she felt was dread.

She couldn’t avoid him. Not when their schedules were so packed together. And yet… If only she could. She pulled on her clothes, barely paying attention to what she was wearing, her mind too preoccupied with thoughts of how to survive the day without falling apart in front of him.

The day started with a soundcheck at a music show. Luna moved through the motions, greeting staff, warming up her voice, and running through their choreography.

All while keeping one eye on Jeonghan.

She didn’t have to look to know he was watching her. She could feel it— the way his gaze followed her across the room. It wasn’t unusual for him to look out for her, but today it was different. His eyes lingered too long, his expressions too soft, too thoughtful.

And yet, she refused to meet his gaze. Whenever he moved towards her, she skillfully maneuvered herself away, pretending to be busy talking to another member or reviewing notes with their staff. When he tried to catch her between breaks, she’d feign exhaustion, lying down in the waiting room, headphones in, eyes closed, hoping he wouldn’t disturb her.

He didn’t. But he watched.

During the interview portion of their music show appearance, she stood sandwiched between Mingyu and Wonwoo, grateful for the buffer zone. Jeonghan was on the other side of the group, but still, she felt his eyes on her. Every time the camera wasn’t focused on them, he’d glance her way, and she’d pretend not to notice.

The weight of it was suffocating, but she couldn’t bring herself to acknowledge it. Not yet.

The rest of the day unfolded in a blur of performances and obligations. She danced, smiled for the cameras, and laughed when appropriate, all while dodging Jeonghan’s attempts to talk to her. When they left the studio for rehearsals, she managed to stick close to the other members, always positioning herself away from Jeonghan without making it too obvious.

But he was relentless. Subtle, but relentless.

For two days, she avoided him with increasing skill. If he took a step toward her, she’d suddenly have a question for staff or be deep in conversation with another member. If he tried to speak to her during breaks, she’d claim she was too tired or needed to use the restroom.

Thankfully, their schedules were so packed that it was easy to stay busy. The exhaustion from back-to-back schedules worked to her advantage— no one questioned why she was too tired to chat during their downtime.

No one, except for Jeonghan.

He never pressed her. Never forced her into a conversation. But Luna knew. She could see it in the way his eyes would flicker with something unreadable when she ducked out of his reach, the way his expression softened whenever she pretended to be preoccupied.

Jeonghan wasn’t fooled. He knew exactly what she was doing.

And he let her.

But there was no escaping the fact that the more she avoided him, the more she felt the tension building between them. It was like a taut string, pulling tighter with each passing day, each fleeting glance, each unspoken word.

And the worst part? She knew it couldn’t last. Eventually, she’d have to face him.

There was only so much running she could do before everything came crashing down again.

And it did.

Three days after her drunken confession, Luna found herself in the worst possible scenario— alone with Jeonghan.

It had been a long day of grueling practice, the kind that left everyone too exhausted to talk, but not too exhausted to finally notice the tension between the two of them.

Luna was desperate to get to her room, hoping to avoid another awkward interaction. She quickened her pace as soon as they entered the dorm, hoping to reach the elevator before anyone could catch up to her— before he could catch up to her.

One thing about Luna is that she hates elevators— she got stuck alone once when she was a child. From then on she never took it alone… till now, that’s how desperate she was.

She must have jinxed it.

As the elevator doors slid open, she stepped in quickly, but a second later, Jeonghan slipped in behind her. The doors closed, trapping her in the small, suffocating space with the one person she had been desperately trying to avoid.

“Fuck my life,” She cursed under her breath.

Where were the other members? Normally, someone would’ve joined them, but tonight, it was just the two of them. Jeonghan must’ve said something to the others, some quiet, strategic whisper to give them privacy.

Luna sighed audibly, her shoulders tensing as she avoided looking in his direction.

The silence in the elevator was unbearable. She could feel Jeonghan’s presence beside her, calm and unhurried.

She hated how composed he always was— how nothing seemed to faze him. Luna, on the other hand, felt like she was barely holding herself together, her heart pounding in her chest, her palms sweaty as she stared straight ahead, willing the elevator to reach her floor as quickly as possible.

But Jeonghan didn’t speak. He didn’t push, didn’t prod. He simply waited, giving her space, like he always did.

If only he wasn’t so perfect.

Finally, unable to bear it any longer, Luna broke the silence. "Just spit it out already," she muttered, still refusing to meet his eyes.

She knew he had something to say, something he’d been holding back for the past three days. It was the thing she had been dreading ever since she confessed her feelings to him— the thing she had been running from since their trainee days.

Jeonghan’s voice was soft, almost tender when he finally spoke. "You’ve been ignoring me."

He didn’t sound angry or hurt, just… understanding.

And Luna hated it. He was too perfect, too kind, too gentle for her own good. How could she not fall for someone like him? How could she not hate him for making it so easy?

A beat of silence stretched between them, heavy and uncomfortable.

Luna could feel the weight of his gaze on her, but she kept her eyes on the elevator doors, counting the seconds in her head, hoping this would all be over soon. But the words were clawing their way out of her, demanding to be spoken.

"What do you want me to say, Han?" Her voice was sharp, and defensive, as if she could protect herself with her words. "That I lied? ‘Cause I didn’t."

She finally turned to look at him, her eyes meeting his for the first time in three days. The impact of it hit her like a wave— his warm, concerned gaze, the softness in his expression, the way he looked at her like he saw straight through her defenses.

"If only it was," she added quietly, her voice breaking just a little at the end.

Jeonghan stepped forward slowly, his movements careful and deliberate, like he was approaching a wounded animal. His hands found her arms, his touch light, barely there, as if he was afraid to hurt her. He gently caressed her skin, his thumb tracing small circles against her sleeve, soothing in a way that only made everything worse.

"Jiyeon-ah..." His voice was low, almost a whisper, as if saying her name out loud might shatter the fragile moment between them.

He didn’t need to say anything else.

Luna knew him all too well.

She knew him inside and out— knew that the look in his eyes wasn’t just concern. There was something else there, something that made her stomach twist painfully.

A twinge of regret. Sadness.

She already knew what he was going to say.

And she dreaded it.

"I…" Jeonghan hesitated, his grip tightening slightly as he prepared to speak, his gaze never leaving hers. "I care about you so much, you know that, right?"

Luna nodded in defeat, biting down on her lip to keep the flood of emotions at bay. She didn’t trust herself to speak.

"But… we can’t do this." His voice was soft, so gentle as if he was trying to let her down easy. "It wouldn’t be professional. And it wouldn’t be fair to the others, to the team. We’ve worked so hard to get here, and… we can’t risk that."

There it was.

The polite rejection.

The one she’d expected but had hoped would never come. The words hit her like a punch to the gut, stealing the air from her lungs. She went numb, her mind buzzing with a kind of dull, painful shock.

She had prepared herself for this. She knew it was coming. But still, it felt like the ground had been ripped out from under her.

She couldn’t hear anything else.

The world around her became a blur, Jeonghan’s words fading into the background as her mind shut down, overwhelmed by the weight of it all. Her chest felt tight, her throat constricting as she struggled to keep herself composed.

If only she could forget this moment… this feeling.

At that very moment, something in Luna’s brain snapped— a survival instinct, a deep-seated need to protect herself from the pain that had just hollowed her out.

A switch flipped, and determination settled over her like a mask. She forced a giggle, light and airy as if nothing had happened. As if her heart wasn’t hanging in tatters inside her chest.

She could see Jeonghan’s face soften, but not in relief. No, his eyes were filled with something else—pain. He knew her all too well. Knew this was her defense mechanism. Her way of pretending everything was fine.

Jeonghan opened his mouth to say something, maybe to stop her from pretending and shutting him out but Luna was faster.

"It’s fine," she said, her voice calm, steady. Her smile not quite reaching her eyes. "I was drunk and being stupid."

There it was.

The first lie.

And then, with a forced chuckle, she gave him the second, her all-time favorite lie, one she had practiced in front of a mirror countless times just in case this moment ever came.

"It’s a little crush. It’ll go away soon."

Luna had become so good at pretending, at brushing off her own heartbreak as if it were nothing more than a mild inconvenience.

She waved her hand dismissively as if her heart hadn’t just been ripped to shreds and thrown at her feet. As if she wasn’t praying for the earth to open up and swallow her whole so she could disappear from the sheer embarrassment of being rejected.

"I’m sorry for worrying you," she said, her voice light, too casual. "You know me. I didn’t want to come off as weird and I’ve been missing my parents lately… Plus, with our schedule being so crazy, I’ve just been all over the place."

She was explaining herself, making excuses for her vulnerability, for the way her feelings had slipped through the cracks in her armor.

It was easier to blame it on something else— on homesickness, on stress— than to admit what was really happening inside her heart.

She saw Jeonghan frown, saw the worry deepening in his eyes as he tried to get a word in, but she was already moving, already pivoting away from the conversation.

"We’re okay." She cut him off, a little too cheerful. Her firm voice cutting through as if to reassure Jeonghan or more so to reassure herself. She stepped forward, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, something she’d done a hundred times before but this time it felt like a goodbye. "Don’t worry about it."

As if on cue, the elevator doors slid open, and without waiting for a response, Luna slipped out, leaving Jeonghan standing there, stunned and silent.

The moment the door to her apartment clicked shut behind her, the facade crumbled.

Luna’s breath hitched, and she locked the door with trembling hands. Her knees buckled beneath her, and she collapsed onto the floor, the weight of everything she had been holding back crashing down on her in one violent wave.

She pressed her forehead to the cool surface of the floor, squeezing her eyes shut as silent sobs wracked her body. The room was too quiet, the kind of quiet that only amplified the buzzing in her ears, the heavy thud of her heartbeat.

She had known it would hurt, but she hadn’t expected it to hurt this much.

For years, she had kept her feelings carefully hidden, burying them deep inside her chest where no one could see, not even herself sometimes.

Luna had told herself it was better this way, safer. But now that it had all come out— now that she had laid herself bare only to be rejected— it felt like everything she had built around herself was crumbling.

All the walls she had put up, all the armor she had worn, were useless now.

If only she hadn’t said anything.

If only she had kept quiet like always.

If only she hadn’t let herself hope.

Luna was angry— at the universe, at herself because she couldn’t find herself to be angry at Jeonghan. It was not his fault after all. It’s not his fault he didn’t feel the same way, he didn’t do it on purpose. In the same way, she didn’t fall for him on purpose.

However, she was angry that she had been stupid enough to believe, even for a second, that he might feel the same way… even a little. Angry that she had let her guard down. Angry that no matter how hard she tried to let go, her heart had latched onto him with a vice grip that wouldn’t loosen.

Her thoughts spiraled, wild and desperate as tears streamed down her face. She had tried for so long to suppress her feelings, to push them down, to keep them from surfacing. But now, they were all spilling out, every fear, every insecurity, every moment of doubt.

Years, she thought, choking on the sobs. Years of holding this in, of pretending I was okay… all for what?

Luna had always known that liking Jeonghan would lead to this.

It had been inevitable, she supposed.

A quiet, creeping sense of dread that had lived in the back of her mind ever since they were trainees. She had always feared that this would be the outcome, that her feelings would only ever be one-sided, that the day she confessed, everything would fall apart.

But she had never expected it to hurt this much.

Her heart clenched painfully, and for a moment, she wished she could rip it out of her chest just to make the pain stop.

The rejection wasn’t even the worst part.

No, it was the fact that Jeonghan had been so kind about it.

So understanding.

So… perfect.

Luna hated that about him.

Hated that he had been so gentle, so considerate when he let her down.

It would’ve been easier if he had been harsh if he had given her something to be angry about. But instead, he had given her nothing but soft words, valid excuses, and apologies.

The buzzing in her ears became a dull hum as the last of her sobs faded, and in the silence, her body slowly went numb as she curled up on the cold floor, hugging her knees to her chest as she let the pain settle deep within her heart.

Luna didn’t push away the pain this time; she allowed it to consume her, to wrap itself around her heart like a vice.

Every ache, every sharp sting of rejection, she accepted it— because maybe if she let herself feel it fully, let herself drown in it for just this moment, her heart would finally learn.

Maybe this time, the hurt would leave a scar deep enough to remind her, to teach her, that hoping for more was futile. That loving someone who didn’t feel the same way was a battle she was always destined to lose.

Maybe, she thought, maybe this time, my heart will finally take the hint and move on.

But deep down, Luna knew better.

She had tried to move on before— countless times—and it had never worked.

No matter how much she wished for it, her heart had always found its way back to Jeonghan. Always.

And now, as she lay there, broken and exhausted, she realized with a painful clarity that this wasn’t the push she needed to forget him.

No.

This was only the beginning.

It was still painful, though.

Knowing that the first guy she had ever liked— the first person she had truly opened up to— would never see her the same way.

Jeonghan had been the first person to approach her, the first person to become her friend, the first person she liked, and now, he was the first person to break her heart.

If only things had been different.

Life, however, moved on.

The next day came with the same grueling schedule and the same routines. Music shows, interviews, practice sessions, and variety show appearances all blurred together as if nothing in her world had been torn apart the night before.

Luna didn’t allow any cracks to show; she was an expert at wearing her mask by now. She laughed with the other members, joked with the staff, and smiled for the fans— all while something heavy settled deeper within her chest, like a stone she couldn’t quite shake off.

With Jeonghan, it was as if nothing had ever happened. No awkward tension lingered between them, no strained silences or hesitant interactions. He treated her the same way he always had— kind, supportive, teasing her whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Jeonghan was worried, of course.

Luna could see it in the way his eyes lingered on her a second longer than usual, the subtle softness in his voice whenever he spoke her name. But he didn’t push. He didn’t force her to talk about what had happened that night, didn’t ask for explanations or demand a conversation she clearly wasn’t ready to have.

Luna spoke to him like she always did, her tone light and unbothered.

Not once did she avoid him because, in her mind, avoiding him would only prove that she wasn’t okay.

And she desperately needed to be okay.

She couldn't allow anyone— especially Jeonghan— to know the truth despite knowing he probably already did.

That her heart still beat just as fast when he smiled at her, that every casual touch sent a familiar warmth spreading through her chest.

No, she wasn’t going to let anyone see that she was still hurting.

Not again.

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months and Luna realized quickly that nothing had changed with her feelings.

They hadn't diminished, they hadn't been pushed away. If anything, they only grew stronger the more she tried to bury them.

So, she made a decision: she would lock them up deep down in her chest, chain her heart, and throw away the key.

It was better like this. Safer.

But fate has a cruel sense of humor.

Because no matter how far Luna thought she’d thrown the key, somehow, in some twisted cosmic joke, it landed straight into Jeonghan’s hands.

Unbeknownst to her, he had already begun to notice the cracks beneath her carefully crafted facade, the moments where her smile faltered just a little too long, or when her gaze lingered on him longer than she intended.

Jeonghan, who had always been so attuned to her, had found the key she so desperately wanted to hide.

And little by little, without her even realizing it, he was using it to unlock the very heart she was trying so hard to protect.

A year had passed since that night.

A year since Luna had bared her soul, and Jeonghan had rejected her.

It was 2018 now, during the filming of the music video of their song ‘THANKS’ and the air was thick with a quiet intensity as the members pushed through a grueling day of shooting.

But even amidst the rush and exhaustion, Jeonghan couldn’t help himself. His eyes followed Luna from a distance, as they often did.

She was talking animatedly to the camera set up for their ‘Inside SEVENTEEN’ behind-the-scenes footage.

Luna’s laugh echoed faintly across the set, and Jeonghan couldn’t stop noticing the smallest things about her.

The way her eyes crinkled slightly at the corners when she smiled— an indication that it was real, genuine, a smile that Jeonghan hadn’t seen in far too long. He noticed how her hair danced in the light breeze, strands occasionally kissing her face before she absentmindedly brushed them away.

Her smile stretched wide, almost reaching her ears, a sign that today, she was happy. Genuinely happy.

And Jeonghan was thankful for that. He’d worried about her for so long.

Luna turned toward him then, catching his gaze. For a moment, time seemed to slow as she smiled at him—soft, warm, real.

Jeonghan returned it with a smile of his own, but the second her attention shifted back to the camera, where she began laughing about something with Dokyeom who sneaked up on her from behind, his heart twisted in a way he hadn’t expected.

Jeonghan would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about her confession every day since it happened. Because he had. It had haunted him, followed him into every quiet moment, and lingered in every glance they shared.

He couldn’t stop thinking about it— about her. He hadn’t stopped worrying about her since that night, either.

The truth was, he admired her— he always had.

Jeonghan admired the strength she had to smile and laugh even when she must’ve been hurting inside.

He admired how effortlessly beautiful she was, today, yesterday, and every day in between.

He admired how she seemed to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders but never let it dim her light.

But as Jeonghan watched her now, laughing freely with Dokyeom, something sharp and bitter jabbed at his chest.

It was innocent, of course. Luna and Dokyeom had always been close. Their laughter was nothing more than friendly.

But that didn’t stop the sudden realization from slapping Jeonghan across the face: he couldn’t keep this lie up any longer.

The lie that he had been telling himself since the night Luna confessed to him.

When she had stood there, vulnerable and raw, spilling her heart out, he had been scared.

He’d made excuses— talked about professionalism, about the team, about the risks. But deep down, they were just that— excuses.

He had lied, not to her, but to himself.

Because he felt the same.

He always had.

And he’d been too scared to admit it, too scared to face what it would mean to let himself fall for her.

If only he hadn’t lied.

If only he hadn’t been scared.

If only he had the courage to do what his heart had been telling him all along.

But the sight of her laughing with someone else, even if it was innocent, hit him like a bolt of lightning.

The thought of someone else making her laugh like that, of someone else being the reason behind those genuine smiles— he couldn’t handle it.

Jeonghan couldn’t let someone like Luna go.

Not now.

Not ever.

His hands were clammy as he fidgeted with the hem of his top, his leg bouncing anxiously. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest, it felt like it might burst out. There was a smile creeping up on his face, a warmth spreading through him, and for a moment, Jeonghan wondered if he was going into cardiac arrest.

But then, no… this wasn’t heart failure.

This wasn’t a symptom of physical pain.

This was him falling for Bae Jiyeon.

It wasn’t fear.

It was exhilaration.

It was the undeniable truth that he couldn’t keep hiding anymore. He was falling for her— had been for a long time, but now, it was clear as day. The thought of her with anyone else made him feel like he’d lose a piece of himself.

And there was only one way to fix that.

Jeonghan wasn’t discouraged by his mistakes from the past. No. He was determined now— more than ever.

Determined to make this right, to tell her what he should’ve said a year ago.

Determined to hold onto her before it was too late.

With the key to Luna’s heart, which she had thrown away in her desperate attempt to lock her feelings deep inside, now firmly in Jeonghan’s grasp, he was determined to unlock a future they both had wished for but were too hesitant and scared to reach.

Jeonghan is determined to do anything to turn the if only into an unequivocally so.

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[yandere-writer-momo]

Yandere Kengan Head Canon: My Only Girl

Yandere Lihito x Childhood friend Afab Reader

TW: unhealthy behaviors, yandere themes, etc.

Lihito has always been like a puppy to you. His eyes always frantically searched for your form in the audience at all his fights. He’d whine if you’d walk too fast for his taste and he’d cling to your side whenever the two of you were together. Your parents constantly asked you if the two of you were dating from how physically affectionate the blonde was… or how his old behavior toward you borderlines on sexual harassment. He’s really matured over the years but it took awhile for him to calm down.

Lihito was obsessed with you… he still was. You’ve been friends for almost two decades and Lihito never stopped chasing after you (or your skirt). You were rather impressed with his determination. A shame he used to make you so uncomfortable.

Lihito used to sneak his hands under your shirt to grab at your stomach or he’d rub your shoulders to try to get you to sleep with him. He’d whisper absolute filth in your ear whenever the two of you were in a crowded area together. And occasionally it would rile you up… not that you’d ever give him the satisfaction of knowing that. Lihito used to be such a horn dog.

The reason why you didn’t date Lihito was because of how impulsive he was. Lihito was an imbecile and easy to manipulate. He constantly put himself in danger over his pride and you didn’t want to go down with that ship.

This was the first time in four years you’ve seen him. It’s the longest time the two of you have ever been physically apart but Rihito called you every single night (in his time zone) and when he woke up. All because he wanted your face and voice to “start his day and end his night.” Cornball.

The two of you sat together at the park. The blonde had an amicable expression on his face as he fidgets in his seat beside you.

“Why don’t we just date?” Lihito draped a muscular arm over your shoulder with a big grin. “I’m sure we could make it work. I know you don’t have much dating experience either so we could jump all the steps and get married!”

“You don’t really live the safest of lives, Lihito.” You told your friend with a frown. There were many times you were terrified he’d die but somehow he always pulled through. “You’ve been conned before too and close to death. I couldn’t worry about my partner constantly. I’d die early.”

Lihito frowned but he pulled your body closer to his. “Well I’m a lot stronger now. I’ve really pushed myself past my limits to make it this far. I’ve really grown over the last few years…”

Lihito rested his head on your shoulder, his blond hair tickled you a bit. “I want to be a better man not just for myself but for you.”

You felt yourself crumble when he gave you puppy eyes. Curse him and his big, baby blue eyes. His stupidly pretty eyes

Lihito nearly whined aloud when you held his cheeks in your palms. “You’re so corny.”

When your lips pressed against his large nose, it was over. The blonde quickly grabbed your hips and pulled you onto his lap, his lips eagerly pressed against yours. His kisses were sloppy and his ardent touches were rough, but you could feel how much he adored you with each touch. You felt as if you were on fire from his love.

You gasped when you felt him grind against you. “Woah there tiger-“ you’re pulled into another needy kiss as Lihito’s hands sneak under your shirt to grasp at your chest. “Lihito-“

“I’ve waited over a decade to touch you…” Lihito muttered into yours lips. His blue eyes heavy with lust. “I can’t wait anymore. I want you right here… right now.”

“At least in a bed.” You laughed at how quickly he scooped you up into his arms. “Impatient much?”

“You’re lucky I love you because I would’ve just done it on that park bench.” Lihito told you, his eyes filled with admiration for you. “Just know you’re not going to be able to walk for a few days until I’ve had my fill.”

“Is this how you talk to all your girls?”

“Girls? What girls? I only have you.” Lihito smiled at you. “You’re my one and only girl.”

[monstas1ut]

Characters w/ black! s/o who’s mad at them

LAW, ZORO, SASUKE, KAKUZU, ARMIN, EREN, ICHIGO, BYAKUYA

contains

__ +18 black coded reader, female reader, nsfw for most, sfw for some, only the Aot men are modern, usage of ‘slut’, Kakuzu uses his tendrils.

__ a/n : Can we talk about how I got so much love from my trafalgar law post? Thank you so much. This is just a small little small headcannon thing.. I needed to write something.. even if it’s shitty lol.

Trafalgar Law is the epitome of ‘get somebody else to do it’. This is only at first when he notices you’re slamming things, rolling your eyes, or sucking your teeth. The surgeon can barely give a damn when you’re acting like this. Most of the time, he knows it’s his fault why you’re acting this way. Law won’t give you any attention until you calm down though.

When you’re finally quiet and shriveled up in a corner with anger looming over you, that’s when he appears. He will be as calm as ever and this will piss you off even more, but alas, Law isn’t dealing with your bratty self anymore.

If this is a public dispute, Law will in fact use his devil fruit to ‘room’ you away from others. There’s just no way he’s going to argue or let you scream at him in public. His eyes would squint at you as if you’re dumb and he’ll grip your chin with his tattooed hand. This of course only gets you to shut up for a little while.

“You are picking at my nerves. Pulling the strings even, and if you do not stop your petty behavior… I will stop it myself.” His voice would be at a low tone, mixed with harsh intent. His eyes would be directly looking into yours. And if his demand did not frighten you in any way, he would then have to resort to getting closer while his thumb slips into your mouth.

Law had never been so sexual before you.. but he knows how much of a slut you are for him. He just knew you’d wrap those glossy lips around his thumb. Not only did it keep you quiet, but it turned him on.. and he’s sure you were just annoyed from him ignoring you… So, his other hand would slip away and down into your bottoms. The only thing he felt was the shameful wetness.

Maybe you were just horny and mad..

“I will not tend to your every little need if you keep acting like this everytime you want to be a little slut..” he says as his fingers slip inside you.

Roronoa Zoro didn’t even know you were mad. Mad at him? For what? The blonde cook was the one that had to flat out tell him that you were angry with him. That’s when Zoro becomes pissed about you even spilling your problems to Sanji. Then, the whole ship has to hear you two verbally brawl.

He’s a petty asshole alright. He’s hidden every bonnet and scarf you’ve ever worn, and to his disbelief, you had one stashed. He’s also the one to cross boundaries and purposefully watch your bonnet fall off your head at night.. and he will not pick it up. He’s just that petty.. But when he finds out why you’re mad, he may stop.

Zoro will end up doing things under your nose. He’ll bring you something at most. He’ll let you sleep with him again.. but the biggest of them all would be how he apologies. It would be murmurs. You wouldn’t even notice he’s trying to say sorry.. The only time he can do it is after he cums in your pussy.

Makeup sex is the way for Zoro. He cannot just verbally say sorry, it doesn’t feel correct.

“..a-ah!… Zoro~… Fuck-.. Fuck-…!” Once you’re creaming all over his cock and he’s digging his cum in you, he will be a panting mess. But yet, his kisses would be planted all on your back and your neck.. up to your ear.

“…I’m fucking sorry…”

Sasuke Uchiha has either left the building or has laid back to watch the show. This man is the most flip flopping character anyone has ever seen. It really depends on the time and day you get angry. There’s the Sasuke who will sit there and watch you with a hard cock, and there’s the Sasuke who will ignore you for the rest of the day until he comes back.

When you’re yelling, cursing and using your hands to talk, Sasuke gets hard. What can I say? He loves strong, determined women. He cannot deal with weak women who stay cooped up in their emotions and never speak up. This is why a black woman is for him. He has a thing for women who speak their mind… and he doesn’t mind saying sorry with his tip kissing your womb.

However, there’s the other side of him that wishes you would shut up for one minute. He knows he’s most likely in the wrong, but hearing you say it and curse him out kind of hurts his pride. He likes to leave home around this type of situation. Does he come back? Yes.. Does he say sorry for leaving? Sorta. He comes back with a gift that’s for sure, but he doesn’t mutter the words ‘I’m sorry’. Not until you’re doing that favorite move on his cock.

If you say sorry for yelling and screaming while bouncing on him.. he’s in heaven.. and it’s not because you apologized.. it’s because he knows you love him just enough to say sorry..

He also knows you’re too stubborn to say that to anyone else.

“Fuck I’m sorry-… I’m sorry Sasuke-… baby…” It literally makes his eyes uncontrollable. His rinnegan stays the same, however his other eye turns that signature red. It’s like he just wanted to see more with his sharingan…. He wanted to see your brown pussy lips even more, and your pink insides..

“Sorry..”

Kakuzu is just that one man that doesn’t care. Really. He had more important things to do. If you’re the type to scream and curse him out while angry, then you’re out of luck. If you are the type that says nothing and presents the silent treatment.. then you may have a chance.

There’s something about the silent treatment that gets Kakuzu’s blood boiling. He cannot stand seeing you avoid him, let alone go running to his partner and talking to that silver haired bastard. Kakuzu cannot stand it. He will constantly give you a harsh glare until you talk to him. But, if you’re consistent and you don’t tend to him at all, he’ll only wrap his tendrils around you.

Doesn’t matter if you’re talking to someone or not, he will wrap them around you and take your bratty ass with him. The second that door slams, you’re all tied with his tendrils and he forces you to tell him what’s your problem.. if it’s someone else.. he’ll deal with it. If it’s something he did.. he’ll only apologize by releasing you and buying you a silky scarf the next day. Hey.. he’ll even eat your pussy for a bonus.

“Oooeh… fuck~…” you purred, curling your toes as those black tendril’s kept your thighs parted. You could see just as well. Kakuzu was slurping every drop of juice that came out of you… and his green irises didn’t fail to stare into your soul while he did it..

“Still pissed off, woman?..”

Armin Arlert will be the one to talk things out with you. There are two men on this list who will, and he’s one of them. He will not force you to do anything, let alone fuck you to tell the truth. The blonde will only watch your anger disperse into thin air after he pampers you with services and material things. He knows you don’t care much for money, but he will buy you whatever you want.

He doesn’t want you pissed off at him forever. That’s what he believes will happen anyways. But, to put things short, he gets you happy faster than the rest. He does this within the hour he sees you mad. If he’s made you mad in some way, shape, or form, he’s going to apologize regardless. Even if it isn’t his fault, he’s spitting out apologies and begging for forgiveness.

He will not go straight to sex, as he believes it will alter the way you two go about things. Instead, after he pampers you in such a manner, he will take you out to dinner and he’ll then.. make passionate love to you.. filled with ‘I love you’.

“Armin-… oh-… right there baby…”

“Right here..? Alright baby I got it.” He softly spoke, his cock rushing through you time and time again. His voice was so soft compared to his hips..

“I love you… I love you so much…”

Eren Yeager. Toxic as hell. We all know this man. The first thing he does when he notices how mad you are is ask you. Yes, he asks you what’s wrong. If you comply and tell him.. it’ll be all dandy.. but if you’re a brat and you say that he should already know what’s wrong, you’re in for it.

This man will not only fuck the truth out of you.. but he will be so rough that you’re seeing stars and you can barely remember what you were even mad for. He cares about your feelings, yes, but the fact is that you were trying to be smart.. so he just fucked the smartness out of you.

Honestly though, after Eren does that and when your brain comes back to life, he will hold you. He won’t leave your side and he’ll even lift you and take you to the bath after a while. No doubt, he has his answer now. He got it while he fucked you silly. If it’s his fault, he’ll actually apologize, however if it’s someone else’s fault… he’s gonna grab his glocky and that’s that.

Long story short.. he’s trying to do better about that..

“Don’t try to hide anything from me.. I just don’t like that shit…”

“Okay.. so that means fuck me and make me mess up the sheets..?”

“Well.. Nah…. I just don’t like that smartass attitude, baby. Now cmere’ I gotta fix that” Eren says as he points to your lifting lace front.

Ichigo Kurosaki will only make the situation worse before it gets better. However, this isn’t such a bad thing. His brain can only comprehend women a little. He doesn’t understand why you’re even mad. He’ll have to get a lesson from Kisuke, that's for sure. The lesson being, women are always right.. which isn’t true at all, but it’s a known motto. Ichigo will try to stand by it..

But he’s Ichigo.

The argument between you two will go on for less than an hour before you're laughing and he’s laughing non stop. Either you two saw someone fall, or you ended up watching something that was entirely too funny to not laugh. Not only that, but you two are straight back to holding each other close.

Ichigo is always so tired from dealing with the soul society, so you naturally understand he comes and goes. But, he does say sorry eventually.. with a letter. He cannot verbally say it because he’s a secret tsundere and will blush like hell is on earth.

‘ I’m sorry for being a bastard. I love you.’

Byakuya Kuchiki, the other man who will talk things out. He’s not dumb whatsoever, and frankly, he knows you’re mad just from the way you hold a glass or the way you move your lips. He’s very attentive and cannot miss a beat with you. Another main, obvious example would be when you are doing your hair and you get frustrated too quickly.

The way of approaching you would be quite formal. He’ll ask pretty quick. He won’t hold back, and he prefers you don’t either. He’s such a good man that you’ll most likely be spilling out what’s wrong. Once he knows, he’ll immediately try to fix said problem, it’ll be easier if it’s because of him… However, if it’s because of someone else, they better run like hell.

Byakuya may be pissed at himself if it was him, but someone else??? Not only will he have a long talk with you, but it’ll also be a long talk with that other person.. and you are also tagging along. He doesn’t like when you’re mad, simply because it interrupts the peace and he wants you happy. He’s the dull one here.. he doesn’t need you to be the same.

After correcting said situation, Byakuya would have a meal ready for the both of you.. and he will make sure to pamper you in a bathtub.. he’s also the king of kissing hands.

“I’d love it if you kept that gorgeous smile on your face. Don’t let anyone take that away, not even me.”

ⓒ Monstas1ut (do not copy)

[writing-reaper]

Bad Batch Reacts…

S/o Letting Go of Their Hand and Stopping

Warnings: shitpost, cursing, fluff

Note: am I writing another tiktok trend? Yes, absolutely. This was just a fun, quick post. Now I just need to write one for Valentine’s Day. Enjoy!

Description: While traveling together through the city, you stop and let go of his hand to see if he notices or keeps walking.

Crosshair

Does he notice?

He notices.

But does he stop?

No!

He knows what your doing, following him through the city when he got too far away for you to just wait.

He’ll use one of the reflectors he keeps to look behind him, laughing quietly to himself about the very upset look on your face.

Crosshair looks back once more, an annoyed pout on your face as you begin toward him. He keeps walking, occasionally looking as you get closer and closer.

“Crosshair!” You call out from behind him as you make your way through a crowd of people. He decided he’d have no better opportunity and he ducked away in an alley, tossing a reflector on the wall in front of him. “Shit.”

You look around and he’s gone. Panic begins to set in. Did something happen? You weren’t on a mission, maybe he saw something? You race forward, looking in every direction.

Finally, you run out of breath and stop, leaning against a corner. Your hand touches something on the wall, and when you turn to look—

“Boo.” If he hadn’t put his hands on your shoulders, you probably would’ve slapped him.

“Maker Crosshair! You scared me!” You shout, your voice laced with both annoyance and relief. Only relieved he didn’t leave you.

“Mesh’la, what are you doing?” He asks, spinning you around, trapping you against the wall.

“It was just a joke, my friend did it to her boyfriend and he spun around and asked her why she let go, I wanted to see what you would do.” You continue to pout, refusing to meet his gaze, pretending to be upset with him.

“Well, I noticed.” He answers, flicking you on the forehead with his toothpick. “It was funny, but don’t do it again.”

“Or what?”

“I’m going to have to walk back to the ship by myself.”

Wrecker

Does he notice?

Also no.

Boy did you let go at the wrong time.

You let go just as he saw one of those food stands he really likes.

You find yourself laughing as he orders something before turning to find you gone.

“Can I get a box of those truffles and, hey do you—” Wrecker turns, now noticing his empty hand and his missing s/o. Confused, he abandons the shop, confusing the employee even more as he searches for you.

“Hey! What are you doing over here?!” He questions, finding you in the middle of the street. Before you can even give him an answer, he picks you up and carried you over to the shop.

“Wrecker!” You shout, surprised by his actions.

“Do you want anything?” He asks, completely oblivious to the fact you abandoned him on purpose.

“Wrecker, I— oooo they have cupcakes!”

Well, you didn’t quite get the response you wanted, but you did get cupcakes.

Tech

Does he notice?

Yes

Tech’s already not very big on holding hands, but this was a crowded place so he made the exception.

When you let go of his hand, it was just as you got out of the crowd.

So, Tech being Tech, he stops as well and takes the opportunity to go on his datapad to check for any messages and where you two going or planning to go.

He’s confused when you start laughing in the midst of him asking you where you wanted to go.

“There is an appliance shop just down here I’d like to stop by. However, there is also an art exhibit. If you would enjoy visiting there, we will have to go now that way there’s still time for me to go to the appliance—” Tech finally looks up from his datapad to see you squeaking out a laugh through your fist. “I am confused.”

“It’s— hah! It’s nothing Tech. Wh-what were you saying about the art exhibit?” You giggle between every through words. Tech gives you a puzzled look before continuing on, telling you about the art exhibit. Except this time, when you continue on, he hooks arms with you as you continue to giggle, satisfied by your very Tech reaction.

Hunter

Does he notice?

Yes, right away.

He’s only here because you wanted to check out the small festival going on.

Hunter’s a little irritated due to being in such a crowded area for a while.

So when you stop and let go of his hand, he just assumes you saw a stand and you wanted to take a look.

He’s confused when you just stand there and smile goofily at him.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, confused and a little worried as you start cracking up into a fit of giggles. He kind of smiles as he takes a moment to focus on you, instead of all the hustling and chatter going on around him. “Is there something you want to look at?”

“Just you.” You answer with a giggle, earning a wide smile from the man you love. Hunter pulls you close to him, oblivious to your trickery and he kisses you on the cheek.

“Real sweet, cyare.” He hums, tucking his face into the nape of your neck. “Does that mean we can head back to the ship?”

“I suppose you’ve held out long enough. Let’s get the boys some food on the way back.” You reply, your own prank slipping from your thoughts as he kisses your neck in a silent plea.

“Whatever you want, mesh’la.”

Echo

Does he notice?

Not at first.

He walks for a few more minutes before he realizes you’re gone.

He panics, but when he turns he finds you weren’t far.

“Everything alright?” Echo asks, confused as to why you just stopped in the middle of the path.

“Everything’s fine.” You answer with a small grin. He gives you a confused look, and takes your hand once more.

“We should head back to Cid’s, I think we’ve been gone long enough—” He turns once more to find you a few feet behind him. “What are you doing?”

You can’t help but laugh as you take his hand once more.

“I thought you wouldn’t notice again.”

“Ohh, so you’re doing this on purpose.” Echo questions with a raised brow.

“Maybe.” You tease, grinning his way.

“Section 8.9 states, ‘if a subject is not compliant—” Echo suddenly moves and picks you up, surprising you at your loss of footing. “Transport them by any means necessary.’”

“Echo! Those rules don’t even count anymore!” You pout, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“They do when you’re with me.” He answers. “What was it you were even trying to achieve?”

“I wanted you to…” you bite your tongue for a moment to stop yourself from laughing. “Echo-locate me.”

“Ugh.”

[catohphm]

HPHM Ship Week '24 Day One - Quidditch

The Day before the Match

Special thanks to @autisticarachnid and @eternalchaoschocolaterain.

This is the first of my fic for @hphm-ship-week! I have been writing a trilogy of short fics about my main MC x Canon ship over the summer for this event. It is my MC Cato paired with Penny Haywood, which I like to call Reesewood. I've been long-awaiting for it to come and now it's here. These were so fun to brainstorm and I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed creating them!<3

The fic begins after clicking the "keep reading" cut below.

The next day would be the Quidditch match against Ravenclaw and Slytherin. Cato Reese, one of the Ravenclaw team’s chasers, had been trying his best to focus on transfiguration homework. He was in the courtyard studying with Rowan to complete the assignments. They had just finished for the day when Rowan saw his best friend looking concerned.

“What are you thinking about, Cato? You can say, I won’t assume anything.”

“I’m having a hard time getting my mind off the match tomorrow, Rowan.”

He leaned in closer to Cato “I get uneasy whenever something big comes up too. It’s never stopped us from passing exams or being on time with homework, even the vaults.”

“Well, I’ve been trying to figure out why it’s hard to keep those thoughts to the side. I think it's because every challenge is different, so are the steps.”

Putting up his hand up to his cheek, Rowan commented in a thoughtful tone. “Hmmm, I see where you’re coming from on that. I doubt it is necessarily a problem, though.”

Cato quickly paused and elaborated “I’ve been trying to remind myself of that. It’s hard because there are so many things going on.”

Something clicked in Rowan. “Ravenclaw honors and values big achievements in learning, being intelligent and knowledgeable.”

“Yes, Rowan. It’s the pressure to do well when you’re dealing with the cursed vaults and people who doubt, or depend on you. I’m trying to enjoy my time here, I’m only fighting them out of a sense of duty.”

Cato’s friend nodded. “I wouldn’t worry about letting anyone down. You’ve got us, your friends. I’m confident you’ll best Slytherin in the game.”

“Thank you! I best put the vaults aside for now. They’re missions that take time to complete.”

Penny was walking by. She saw her friends and approached them

“Hi Cato and Rowan! How’s it going?”

Cato spoke first. “Hi Penny. I was a bit worried how well I’d do in the upcoming Quidditch match against Slytherin.”

“He’s been stressed somewhat about everyone expecting highly of him.” added Rowan.

“Ahh, I know how hard it is being popular.” Cato and Rowan encouraged her to join them. The Hufflepuff smiled and sat down with her two Ravenclaw friends. 

She then elaborated “Many of our classmates look up to me because of my beauty and my skills at potions. I really do appreciate it, but they must remember it all comes naturally.”

“That’s a great point!” Rowan exclaimed then frowned. “Sadly people these days tend to take those things for granted.”

In a somewhat exhausted tone, Cato reflected “I only wanted to build my skills in magic and make friends at Hogwarts. Never have I imagined in the first place that I’d have such obligations. Schoolwork is one thing, but all it together with quidditch and the vaults is too much.”

Penny and Rowan rested their hands on Cato's shoulders. He looked at both of them on his sides and felt brighter.

“I wouldn't dwell too much on trying to impress or prove to everybody. I try to pay attention to my own work first.” she said.

Rowan added “We can only do the best we can. All we want from you is to be happy, do well in class and stay in touch with you. We're always by your side regardless of what comes, Cato.”

“Thank you, Penny and Rowan, it does mean a lot.” their friend answered with a warm smile and nod.”

Rowan then got up from the bench. “I need to return this book real fast before the library closes. I'll be back.” Cato and Penny nodded in response as their friend went to drop off the book.

With them having a short moment to themselves, Penny then spoke.

“So, Cato, are you still feeling nervous about this at all?” she asked him.

“Still some, I guess. Worrying about getting knocked off my broom by a bludger keeps me going in the game but it's more a hard thought to shake off more than anything, Penny.”

She smiled. “You can always keep me in your thoughts.”

“Ah, Penny, how so?” he asked in a giggly voice.

“Even if you get knocked off your broom by a bludger, I'll be there with you in the hospital wing.”

She then kissed him on the cheek. It made Cato blush a bit and laugh. “How could I never count on you, Penny? You've always done your best to look out for me ever since the day I first faced Merula in a duel, got in trouble just for standing up for Ben and helped me up, get my things when I fell trying to face Rowan about to be late for Charms. That's some real above and beyond stuff.”

“I've always appreciated that about you, Cato. The prophet and those other students, they treated you harshly for what? Stuff your brother did when you were just at home? I could never see any of that being true in the first place. You've always been there to help people who need it, even when you know it goes against the rules.”

“I still did what was right?”

“Yes!” assured Penny. “It doesn't make anything you did less right, Cato. I wouldn't worry about it. Rest up when the time comes for tomorrow, I have faith you'll make an amazing effort for the team!”n

[starrygetou]

𝙡𝙖𝙯𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜

ship: satoru gojo x suguru geto

tags: fem!stsg, no curses au, established relationship, drabble, no beta read bc i’m different (if there’s typos, no there isn’t 🫶🏾)

pronouns used: satoru (she/her), suguru (they, she)

note: not much to say but, I LOVE STSG

MDNI PLEASE AND TY

======================================

the chilly december air was always a nice way to wake up for satoru. for one reason, she typically ran cooler so it meant suguru would definitely be cuddling her more often just to make sure satoru didn’t become a popsicle in the night. satoru also loved how crisp the air in their shared apartment was, almost welcoming her first breaths to ring in a new day. but if all the thing, she loved waking up to her beautiful wife in a tank top; nipples slightly poking through from the chilly air.

satoru always tried to be normal in the morning when this happened, but she’s only so strong. i mean, when your wife of seven years is as breathtaking as suguru is, you gotta just take a minute to take it all in.

suguru was currently laying on their back, one arm tucked underneath satoru’s head, their bicep used as a pillow, the other arm lightly holding satoru’s hand as it rests on her stomach. suguru always looked so peaceful when she slept. their long hair in two long dutch braids, a few messy strands hanging in the front, her lips slightly parted, head typically always looking towards satoru. god satoru wanted to kiss them so bad. waking up to this every morning was a blessing in it if itself that satoru promised to never take for granted, even before they officially started dating almost 7 years ago.

satoru scoots a bit closer to suguru, head now resting on her chest as they slept. their heartbeat sending a calming wave over satoru, nearly sending her back to sleep. but, satoru had another thing planned for this morning.

she cranes her head up a bit, gently pressing a kiss to suguru’s cheek, moving her hand that held her partner’s lower to the hem of their shirt. suguru stirred slightly, not fully awaking yet as satoru kept pressing kisses to her cheek, slowly making her way down to suguru’s neck and shoulder. after another minute or so, suguru finally starts to wake up, gently hugging satoru close to her with one arm as the other rubs her eyes.

“g’morning, lovey,” suguru says softly, not really ready to speak or get ready for the day ahead.

satoru smiles hearing their voice, moving her body so now that she lays on top of suguru. suguru moves one hand down satoru’s back, resting on the crook of her hip while her other hand gently holds satoru’s chin, both of them leaning in to share a soft peck on the lips.

“good morning baby,” satoru says smiling as she ticks some of her hair behind her ears, shifting her lower body a bit to give a soft grind against suguru’s pelvis.

“you slept well i assume.”

“i always sleep well when i know i’m gonna wake up to a sight like this,” satoru says as she moves her hands up suguru’s chest, stopping just below their tits.

suguru gives a soft smile and moves her other hand down to satoru‘s waist, both hands now migrating down a bit more to give satoru’s ass a gentle squeeze.

satoru leans in for another kiss and suguru accepts it, a little more hungry this time around. suguru helps grind satoru’s clothed pussy against her stomach while satoru gently rubs suguru’s pierced nipples over their tank top. suguru moans softly into the kiss before pulling away, a string of saliva connecting between their already puffy lips.

“do you wanna get the strap baby?” suguru asks as she licks her lips, still massaging the fat of satoru’s ass, fingertips staring to slide underneath satoru’s underwear.

“i wanna try something different today,” satoru says breathlessly, not realizing how quickly she’d get turned on. “you trust me right?”

“i’d trust you with my bonsai tree, and we both know how you are with plants.” suguru jokes before giving a small peck to the corner of satoru’s lips.

“okay. rude, first of all. second, it’s nothing bad,” she defends before climbing off suguru, sliding her panties off herself. suguru follows suit. once satoru is back in the bed, she gently opens up suguru’s legs, resting one of them on top of her hip and cages suguru’s other leg in as she scoots closer. suguru watches intently, both her arms resting behind her head.

[siriusly-sapphic]

Alright these two are my absolute darlings, my destructive sweethearts who love each other more than they can handle, and I’ve loved them for years and there’s not that much fic for them and I’m personally kinda picky about their dynamic in fic but I am also trying very hard to spread the word of this ship so I wanted to make a rec list of my fifteen favourite fics for Sirius Black/Narcissa Black Malfoy!

All of these fics center around siricissa, so there’s the obvious warning for cousin incest in every fic. Other warnings have been included, but please do read the tags and all before reading bc I just included the most obvious warnings.

They’re sorted by year they were published, starting in 2010 with the very first fic I ever read for them (I only read it in like 2016 or so, but still) and ending in 2023!

Also for one of these fics, this gorgeous piece of art was created that I’m still stunned by each time I see it, so I wanted to bring some special attention to it. It was created by @dragonanddirewolf for the fic The Black Rose.

The list:

Nothing Like the Real Thing by beren (@berenwrites) Explicit | 2900 words | Includes Lily/Narcissa Warnings: Polyjuice potion to have sex, and they're at Hogwarts so potentially underage?

Summary: This is actually the first fic I ever read for them and I still really like it! Lily and Narcissa have an arrangement where one takes polyjuice to look like someone of the other person’s choosing before they fuck. Narcissa chooses Sirius, and she gets closer to the real deal than she’d anticipated.

2. Once Upon a Dream by Elfflame (@elfflame) Explicit | 5280 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa Warnings: Infidelity

Summary: Narcissa hosts a masquerade ball at Malfoy Manor. Sirius sneaks in, in costume, and dances and flirts with her anonymously. They both have an idea of who the other is, but it’s better not to say that out loud until the night’s over.

3. Sleeping in the Devil’s Bed by A_Factorygirl_69 (2012) Explicit | 7819 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa Warnings: Infidelity

Summary: They meet during the first war in the Leaky Cauldron and Sirius is as crass as he could possibly be. Narcissa hates it, she tells him so, and then she spends 8000 words taking him up on his crude offers.

4. A thousand silhouettes by elle_blessing Teen | 3094 words | Includes a playlist

Summary: Their lives, sneaking around at Hogwarts and watching their family fall apart. Short fragments throughout the first war, in which Sirius is one year older than Narcissa instead of her being older.

5. Making darkness in the day by slashmarks (@slashmarks) Explicit | 2589 words | Sirius lives AU

Summary: During the second war, Narcissa goes into hiding in Grimmauld Place and marries Sirius for the magical protection it offers. This is their wedding night.

6. Sirius Black’s Highland Fling by MarshmallowMcGonagall (@marshmallowmcgonagall) Explicit | 6309 words | Sirius lives AU

Summary: After the second war, Sirius is set to attend a muggle party in Harry’s stead and can think of no better person to accompany him than Narcissa. He takes her shopping, then dancing, and what’s a night out without a healthy dose of semi-public sex?

7. Black and Gold by MarshmallowMcGonagall (@marshmallowmcgonagall) Explicit | 2080 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa

Summary: Sirius has been cursed with the curse of Echo, leaving him unable to speak beyond copying others’ words until the person he loves kisses him. Naturally, he heads to Narcissa for help. Naturally, she makes him wait for it.

8. Weight of Silence by hazellepotter (@wandlores) Teen | 2100 words | Canon Compliant (ends with Sirius going to the ministry in OOTP)

Summary: Sirius during OOTP tells Buckbeak about how in love with Narcissa he once was, and why it didn’t work out. Includes a few flashbacks to sweeter moments between them, before everything fell apart and it's just very bittersweet.

9. Black Bones by devianthouseofblack Explicit | 5059 words | Background wolfstar and lucissa Warning: Underage (I believe Sirius is 16, Narcissa is older)

Summary: Sirius has run away from his family, Narcissa is engaged to Lucius Malfoy. She sees her family falling apart around her, and is determined to get Sirius back to their side. When other attempts at convincing him fail, she figures out a different way of showing him that his pleasure is his to take.

10. Silver Shackles and Rose Thorns by JustaDeadDove Explicit | 2936 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa Warning: Infidelity

Summary: Narcissa is engaged, so no one pays her any attention anymore now that she’s done the right thing. At a family gathering, she steals a few private moments for herself and Sirius is quick to take advantage of them by paying her all the attention she deserves.

11. Helpless by Thistlecat (@thistlecatfics) Explicit | 1970 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa

Summary: Sirius is cursed at a party and is immobilised. Narcissa finds him and does eventually help him, but first they take this as a great opportunity to have their way with each other. Healthy dose of mocking and bratting, too.

12. They Leave Us by Doshu (@vdoshu) Explicit | 5239 words

Summary: Angst and betrayal during the first war. Sirius is caught when he goes on an undercover mission because he's figured out who the spy is and of course Narcissa catches him. Lucky for him, because some beautiful hate sex ensues.

13. Your Cigarette Smell by Lumosatnight (@lumosatnight) Explicit | 9680 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa Warning: Canon-compliant MCD

Summary: Non-linear story spanning their relationship from when it starts durings the first war up until his death during the second. Beautiful, painful, hot, everything they’re supposed to be. Their push and pull ‘not being able to stay away from each other even when they want to’ dynamic really comes through here.

14. The Black Rose by DracoIgnis (@dracoignisworld) Explicit | 36,134 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa Warning: Implied? Canon-compliant MCD? But maybe not?

Summary: This is the fic the art work linked above is for! I will never not be a sucker for canon-compliant stories for these two, and this again spans the first and second wars and is just beautiful. It starts when they’re young, and ends with Narcissa finding out he’s been killed at the ministry, with some moments during both wars and in the time between him escaping prison and the second war starting!

15. The stars don’t shine, they burn by Mymblehowl (@st-clements-steps) Explicit | 6108 words | Background Lucius/Narcissa

Summary: This is a modern AU in which Narcissa is a lawyer, married to Lucius, and Sirius is trying to get custody of Harry instead of the Dursleys. Narcissa represents the Dursleys, and also Sirius has an OnlyFans account which she insists she only watches because it might be relevant to the case. She doesn’t quite stick to just watching his videos.

These are my recs for now! Obviously there are a lot more fics in the AO3 tag, but I’m a picky bitch with a bad memory and these are my absolute favourites so for now this is it. I hope you enjoy reading them!

[shamelesslyshippingocxcanon]

Bucky x Reader: Wakanda

Let's face the fact that Wakanda Bucky is a dandere. He's soft and shy, and basically blushes if you talk to him

You'd be: A) This Wakandan person, whether native or adopted by SoMeOne, or B) You're this CIA agent who gets to tag along with Ross during the Wakanda-opens-up-to-the-world thing

cough cough that's the best thing to do with an OC shipped with Bucky cough cough

You're anyhow amazed at the place. It's not every day you see friendly rhinos, a black panther, a genius princess, and female warriors with Starbucks cups

I also headcanon that Okoye almost quit the Dora unless T'Challa made a Starbucks in Wakanda

And Bucky is on the list of amazing things

The first time he saw you, he was pretty sure he was hallucinating or something, you looked...different than the Wakandans he met

Shuri is the first one to catch one, you guys

"Oh! Y/n! Meet Bucky! He's this brainwashed ass-"

"Shuri!" He gets really flustered

"Y/n Y/n/l, work at CIA"

He vaguely might recall you from the area

"Pleased to meet you...Y/n"

He doesn't realize it's a crush till Steve and Natasha and Sam visit, they immediately start teasing (Nat and Sam) laughing randomly (Sam), and giving advice (Steve and Nat)

He shows up with small excuses like 'Um...Zazu the guy from the coffee shop said you missed the coffee break, and I got it for you' and 'Shuri said you have to go back to the lab...you want me to come with you?'

It's adorable

But one night you accidentally hear him while having a nightmare, you were walking outside peacefully. And you heard him, of course, you're a good person. So you went over and woke him up.

And of course, Bucky is god damned embarrassed, and he doesn't sleep with his arm and shirt on.

But you're more worried about him than the arm and the shirt, you ask him a bunch of questions

"Are you okay Bucky?"

"Yeah...I'm fine, I'm fine"

As you start to leave the blurts out if you could stay with him. Which makes you stop in your tracks. He curses himself for talking and tries to apologize.

But you accept to his surprise. Why wouldn't you?

He doesn't have to wake up all night. Best sleep ever, and you KINDA cuddle.

It would be an awesome moment to just...say you both really like each other

It slips away

But! He does come to you when he has nightmares, and you come to him with problems. Ending up spending so much time together.

He can't ask you out, not now, he's afraid of scaring you away, you're his whole world.

But you LOVE him, not like him.

Bucky and you start getting closer, hugs get a bit more common, and he actualy kisses you one time, on the forehead, a surprise for both

Shuri literally is going to die, she's gonna resort to stalking

"JUST KISS ALREADY YOU TWO!"

"But Shuri, we do."

"WAHTTT-"

"Platonically Shuri."

Also, headcanon that Ramonda adopted Bucky

At this point, every single person in Wakanda ships you two, even the goats seem determined to push you two tougher, literally.

"Which was this ass?"

"Uh...I think it's Rumlow...?"

"You named a goat after a HYDRA agent??"

"Rumlow was the first jerk I thought of."

Finally, he asked you out. T'Challa threw a massive party in the palace, Bucky steered away and bumped into you on the top floor of the palace you looked...amazing, as you always did though

So, he manages to get himself together before talking to you

He's still shy, and he's probably gonna ramble for a bit before getting to the point.

"I really like you- Actually...I think...I love you..."

Your brain takes a minute to process it, and he's already apologizing

"I mean, you really don't have to do anything, I just had to put it out there an-"

"It's okay. Cause...I love you too."

[mocha-writes]

Tagged by @rlainarin to do this tag game

Three Ships:

Strahd von Zarovich/Patrina Velikovna (Ravenloft/Curse of Strahd): I admit they’re both close to—if not already at—the point of being original characters with the departures I’ve taken from canon when constructing my own lore for a potential CoS campaign, but I have been thinking about them for years (the guy who tagged me in this can confirm it). Every day I grow closer to the rewrite where the love story at the center of Ravenloft’s formation was theirs instead and they’re co-Darklords of Barovia.

Lestat de Lioncourt/Nicolas de Lenfent (The Vampire Chronicles): I just love how deep, meaningful, and ultimately terrible their relationship seemed in The Vampire Lestat. It’s such an inversion of the tropes I usually see associated with romance between childhood friends. The contrasts between them and their equally fierce emotions compel me, even though I know their story ends suddenly and tragically. (It also adds interesting layers to Lestat’s eventual relationship with Louis)

Orpheus/Eurydice (Hadestown): It feels a bit weird highlighting the musical rather than the myth it’s based on but anyway, I really love Hadestown Orpheus and Eurydice because of their contrasts and how they share each other’s worldviews (though in different ways) by the end, and how despite everything—despite reconciling Hades and Persephone and giving the world back its seasons—everything still ends bittersweetly.

First Ship: I’m pretty sure it was Erik/Christine from The Phantom of the Opera musical. I hadn’t even seen the 2004 movie or the stage version as a kid, but I squeezed everything I could out of (I think) Wikipedia and DeviantArt lists (the kind where one drew responses to prompts) about the film version and made things up in my own head. The memory that’s coming to mind is of gender-flipping them and trying to write my own play with that premise. Now, I personally prefer Raoul/Christine, but they still have a place in my heart, particularly the 1989 movie’s versions of them.

Last Movie: Hairspray (2007)

Last Song: “The New Girl in Town” (stuck in my head thanks to the aforementioned movie)

Currently Reading: The Vampire Lestat. It’s been slow-going with this one because Life but I have around 200 pages left. It’s made me appreciate Lestat even more, though I don’t necessarily believe everything he says.

Currently Watching: Not engaged with any TV series at the moment

Currently Eating: I had popcorn for a snack a while ago

Currently Craving: Stability, that setting up my new PC will go well, that I can play video games again and introduce my fictional people to my friends and their fictional people… I miss having the drive for OC asks and writing prompts. I’d like to get back into those somehow

This was originally titled something like “tag 9 people you want to get to know better,” but I struggle with thinking of people for these things… Tagging @perkeleen-lavellan , @hurl-a-can , @whenyoulosesmallmind and @darkspawntaxcollectors . There’s no obligation, as always, this was just fun and I thought I’d share. If you want to do this but weren’t tagged, do it anyway; let me enable you.

[whatwouldvalerydo]

The theory of blow magic - The final blow - 9/9

Warning: minor sexual references and swear words.

And it's a wrap people and what fun this comical series was. Thank you for indulging me as I wrote something comical.

Akira (@cursebreakerfarrier )and Talia have a talk because of course Talia is bored.

Often times being with Akira felt like being outside of the entire world while looking into the daily lives of others. Most days were spent isolated, other times carefully watching the moves of others as they traversed each day unknowing of the fact that a pair of immortals sat and monitored their every move.

Usually Talia would have no problem with the silence that engulfed them as they travelled at ungodly hours while the rest of the world slept, but sometimes she would be so bored she just couldn’t help taking a jab at the taciturn man beside her. Especially on slow nights when they were hunting down targets who refused to emerge from their homes or return to them.

“How does it feel to be one of the most boring eternals ever?”

Without missing a beat or looking at her, Akira blinked only once “Like I want to kill someone close.”

Scoffing she rolled her eyes “Funny, but that ship has sailed.”

A soft sigh escaped his lips as he gave her a quick side glance “Really making me question my life decisions Talia.”

“Good, because otherwise you’d get bored. Can’t have you be that on top of boring.”

Shaking his head slightly, he continued to ignore her while she played with a knife, balancing it on top of her finger, however Akira was well aware she had reached her quota of sitting still. It depended, sometimes she would be as quiet as him, participating willingly and actively. Other times, random as her mood didn’t follow a set pattern, she would be restless, unable to sit still, wanting to talk in the most inopportune times.

“Wonder what house you would have been if you were at Hogwarts.”

“Slytherin.” His voice carried its low deep tune.

“Wonder how you would have dealt with the curse.”

He knew she was batting him, but he asked anyway to keep the conversation going “What curse?”

And there it was, that small smirk “The theory of blow magic.”

“What?” he asked, brows shooting up, that single glimpse of a startled expression making Talia laugh.

Leaning closer to his ear, she whispered “Apparently a fancy book haunted the last year students. A fancy book on how to suck and fuck.”

Creating a bit of distance, he searched her face “Are you being serious right now?”

“Dead serious. There was such a book circulating ever since the Victorian era.”

Letting out a heavy sigh, he resisted the urge to roll his eyes “If it was that old it mustn’t have been that interesting.”

Pondering on his statement Talia missed a beat, falling silent for a few seconds before actually responding “I don’t know, I mean sex is sex and people were freaks since the first time a man stuck his dick in a woman, or a man or whatever and whoever anyone chose to fornicate with. Being old literature doesn’t make it bad. Unless…” The mischievous glint in her eyes told him she was plotting something “you’re saying that older generations had boring sex. So that means your sex is boring as well.”

“Why do I even talk to you?”

Offering him a big smile, she winked “Because you secretly like it and me. So how about you come here and let me write you a new theory on blow magic.”

“We’re in the middle of a forest, scouting our target.”

“Not even home tonight, so come here, let me teach you some new tricks.”

[ladybellissima]

Finding Love Katakuri x Reader Part 28

Silence and darkness welcomed Katakuri with open arms after another hour of torture. He lost the track of time. He couldn't tell, if it was day or late at night or if already weeks past or only days. Katakuri could only focus on his mental strength to not break. To not lose against these bastards and show any weakness. Never would they get informations about his family. Never would they be able to get a trumph card against his mother to destroy his home.

"never will they get close to my wife…"

Closing his eyes the image of her lovely smile popped up in his mind. He would do anything to have her by his side now. Close, embraced in his strong arms. It broke him more than every torture they would try. Moving slightly, he growled of the immense pain, which shot through his body like an arrow. He wasn't able to move an inch. Still cuffed with the damn sea stones, he was defensles hanging from the wall.

"She sure knows by now what happened… God damn it.", he cursed and could imagine her tears, her helpless cries about the fact that he wouldn't come back ever again. Biting his lip of desperation, till blood slowly ran down his chin, he tried hard not to cry. Katakuri was lying to himself. He was already broken. He couldn't. He just couldn't accept to not see her ever again.

"I want to life…."

His frustrated whisper echoed through his lonely cell, but he knew all too well that his hopes were useless.

"I just want to say how much I love you. Just one last time… My lovely sweet wife…"

Shaking his head to control his feelings he sighed deeply. The most important thing was that she would be safe and that was the last string for him to keep on fighting.

xxx

" Fuel low… Fuel low"

(Y/N) 's look fell onto the display of the ship. Horrified she gasped of shock, while she guided the ship with high speed through the sea.

"Not now! Out of all places it have to happen here!", she spoke frustrated, while the ship trembled of another push of a sea monster. She was so close, so damn close after traveling for exhausting long weeks, but out of nowhere a sea king followed her tracks and started to attack. Sweat rolled down her forehead, while she pushed button after button to get faster and hopefully out of the territory of this monster.

"You damn beast! Get out of my way… Who knows how much time Katakuri has left…", she shouted frustrated and her look fell onto his vivre card which was already burnt to the half.

Suddenly the ship was shaking like crazy and (Y/N) was rolling from one side to another, up and down and to all directions. Her bags were roughly pushed open and ingulfed with Big mom's sweets, she quickly grabbed the small bag from Pudding to not lose it too. Screaming she lost completely control over the situation and the next moment everything was black. With half lided eyes she only was able to see the red control lights and the sound of water.

Was this her end now?

"Damn it… Katakuri…", she whispered before her vision became blurry.

"Captain Coby there is something swimming before us!", a marine cadet called out to the young man and let him look out with a serious expression on his face.

Finding the object, he could only tell that it was pink.

"From what we could see it seems like an underwater submerge ship, but I am not sure..", the cadet spoke next to his captain.

Irritated he ordered to get closer to this mysterious thing and got more confused after getting a better view.

"a… a Bonbon?", he spoke dumbfounded and never saw such a thing.

"yes captain Coby. A swimming… Yeah… bonbon.", the marine spoke kind of amused of the situation. It really looked ridiculous. Slowly they pulled the huge vehicle out and placed it onto the ship.

"Who would travel with such a… honestly I can't find the right words for that.", he spoke and watched the others who were looking for an entry.

"Captain!"

Slowly Coby stepped to the marine and looked into the ship. Gasping he couldn't believe his eyes. In between an huge amount of sweets was laying a breathtaking young girl, who was hugging a small bag dearly. With hearts in their eyes his crew flew around him, while Coby still couldn't move an inch of this image. Shaking his head he entered the ship and came to her side.

"She seems okay… Just unconscious", he whispered and brushed some strainds of hair out of her face. Smiling he took her into his arms and came back outside.

"How sweet"

"She looks like an angel…."

Ignoring his lovesick marine collegues, the young man walked to his office and laid her down onto his bed.

"We will head back to the base!", he ordered quickly and made sure that (Y/N) was comfortable.

It took her awhile to wake up. With a loud groan she opened her eyes and watched her surroundings. Confused she found herself in a neatly cleaned office and relieved, she found Pudding's bag beside her bed on a table. Nervously she got up from her laying position to get a better view.

"Oh finally you are awake…", a voice got her attention and she was met with a young looking man with pink hair. Most of it was hidden behind a bandana. Clothed with a captain coat, he seemed of a high rank. (Y/N) realized that her accident with the sea king, led her directly to a marine ship. She wasn't prepared to get in touch with these people so suddenly and felt in a way helpless of what to say.

"You don't have to be afraid. I am Captain Coby. We found you and your… Yeah ship. Are you feeling alright? You aren't hurt or? ", he spoke politely and came a step closer, but stopped immediately after he noticed her shiver.

"I.. Am fine. Thank you for your concern. And thank you for helping me out there. I am very grateful.", (Y/N) spoke as friendly as possible and smiled slightly towards the captain. In a way he seemed nice. Blushing he avoided her sweet smile and coughed to calm down.

"That's a relief.", he spoke and was about to ask further, but a cadet stepped to his side.

"Captain. We are here. The base is calling.", he spoke nervously and quickly Coby turned to the exit to answer the call. Stopping in his tracks, he looked back to (Y/N) and smiled widely.

"Don't worry Miss. You are safe here. After all, We are at the marineford base G-1! ", his words rang in her ears and let her eyes widen. She was there. She really was able to get to Katakuri's prison. Wiping her tears away she took a deep breath.

"Now (Y/N) focus. Calm down, get information and get an overview of the situation…", she spoke to herself, while her look wandered to her hand. Touching the black ring of Katakuri, she knew that she first had to make sure, if she was able to speak with them about her situation. On her way she thought about her possibilies. Maybe she was able to make a deal? To give them money to let her husband go? Sighing she took the ring off of her finger and placed it into the bag. Till she didn't know what would happen, she should hide her identity.

Stepping outside she gasped of the sight before her. The marineford was huge. It looked like an empire. The high stonewalls, cannons and thousands of marines, which were patrolling around the place were making her shiver of fear.

"Impressive right?", Coby's voice got her attention and let her look up to the smiling captain. Nodding she thought about her husband and where exactly he was being kept.

Deep in thought she didn't notice that the ship was already inside the base and docking on land.

" Captain Coby, Navy Admiral Akainu is waiting!", one of the many marines called out to them and softly he tapped (Y/N) 's shoulder to get her attention.

"Come with me please.", he spoke and walked forward. With every step she felt her nervousness raise. Mens were gasping and drooling of her appearance, which made her quite uncomfortable and Coby annoyed. Sighing he looked down to the beautiful girl and could see how afraid she was and the most scary meeting was already waiting around the corner.

"We will meet now Navy Admiral Akainu. He is one of the most powerful marines. I am sure that he won't cause you any harm. He is just very cruel against pirates or other criminals.", Coby spoke and didn't notice that he sounded in a way sad.

"You don't seem really happy about your motivated Admiral. ", quickly apologizing of maybe going too far, Coby just chuckled of her sweet behavior.

"You got a point. Well it's just.. I believe in justice, but it's important to see the person behind the actions too. If he is just killed because of the title, I think that's going into the wrong direction.", he spoke nervously to relieve his true intentions. Smiling (Y/N) stopped him by grabbing his arm, which gave him goosebumps.

" That's very honorable of you. You see things through your heart. I don't know this Admiral yet, but I am sure you are a way better marine than him, because you give people a chance and not judge someone by his appearance or name.", (Y/N) spoke with a smile and took him of guard. He was really fascinated by this woman. After being in trouble and god knows how long she was in that bonbon vehicle, she still kept a heartwarming smile on her face.

"Why is a girl like you out on the sea alone?.", he asked out of the blue and got a blushing mess of thinking out loud, while (Y/N) watched him with raised eyebrows.

"a girl like me?"

Flustered he fought for words and started to walk again.

"Forget what I said. Nevermind… Let's go.", he spoke quickly and they walked along a corridor to reach a big double door at the end. Pushing it open, Coby let (Y/N) walk inside, who was shivering of the cold atmosphere. The room was huge. High walls with windows made the room even more bigger. At the end was a big desk with two marines on each side. But that wasn't really important at that moment. Because her eyes met the serious ones of the Navy Admiral Akainu. Alone his strong expression made her scared. He was frozen in place and showed no sign of starting a conversation. Uneasy (Y/N) stopped and waited for Coby to help her. He knew right away how intimidating his superior was and stepped beside her.

"Navy Admiral Akainu. Here is the person who was traveling with the strange object.", he spoke professional, while Akainu's look was piercing her.

"Your name.", he asked and crossed his arms.

"(Y/N)… ", she quickly spoke and pressed her fist together for support. She had to pull herself together. It was her only chance.

"Why is a young woman traveling out there all alone? There has to be a good reason for that.", he spoke calmly and looked down onto his papers again. (Y/N) didn't know if she was allowed to speak, while he was reading and waited dumbfounded.

"What's the matter? Are you thinking of a good lie?", he suddenly asked and looked up shortly with a bored expression. Coby knew how this man loved to play with people. Looking down to her he was stunned of (Y/N) 's annoyed look.

"I am terribly sorry, but seeing you reading in between our meeting, I thought of not to disturb you.", she spoke with a hint of anger and let the Admiral raise his brows stunned. It was many years ago that someone was speaking with him like that. On the other hand Coby was sweating like crazy.

"I see… I was unpolite. So again. Who are you?", he asked in a demanding tone which let her shiver. Thinking about what to do she felt her heartbeat increasing.

"Admiral Akainu!", a sudden voice cut in and a marine stepped into the room. Annoyed he gave the intruder an angered look and let him bow in apologize.

"I am sorry to disturb, but we found an inscription at the cockpit of this stranger's ship. It belongs to the Big mom pirates!", he spoke and let (Y/N) 's heart stop for a moment. The air got thick and cold, while Akainu gave her a deadly glare.

"You are a pirate? And belong to this scum of people… ", he spoke with a dangerous calm voice. Coby gasped shocked and couldn't believe it. (Y/N)' s mind was racing. She had to find a good answer. A good plan. The moment she stepped into this room she realized that speaking things out and make a deal wasn't an option.

"Alone for the way you speak to me, I will kill you with my own hands.", he growled and got up pissed.

Gasping (Y/N) stepped back, while tears rolled down her face. She always learned to be honest. To never betray others, but this time she would.

For him.

Taking a deep breath she walked closer to the angered Navy Admiral, who was able to kill her with one hand. Coby wanted to stop her, but knew all too well that things got already too heated.

" My name is (Y/N) (L/N). I am the princess of Exotica. "

[ducky-died-inside]

Hello there, Ducky! I hope you’re doing well. May I suggest Varian with a Gender Neutral s/o who is a pirate? Like idk how to expand ahh like just a funky pirate s/o that sings him sea shanties and brings gifts from far away places? Much obliged, stay safe!! Feel free to delete this req if you’d like

The Wellerman: Varian x GN Pirate Reader

Summary: Headcanons for if you were a pirate and Varian's s/o

Genre: mostly fluff with a bit of angst

Notes: I love sea shanties so yes. Also I'm just doing headcanons for this bc I tried writing a fic but my motivation and inspiration dried up. Reader is 21 and Varian is 20.

Warnings: bit of blood and small stab wound, cursing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He absolutely LOVES your voice, no matter what you think about it

He will beg you to sing any songs you learned from sailing or other pirates

His favorite is the Wellerman (this is my favorite and I'm definitely projecting shhhh)

"Please, Y/N! You like singing it, I like hearing it, it all works out!

"Fine, but this is the last time today."

"Yay!"

There once was a ship that put to sea...

You steal little things that remind you of him while on your travels

It's mostly rare chemicals and shit that he mentions in passing

You remember everything he needs

He never once gives you any lists of stuff, but you come home with a big ass bag full of stuff for him every time

"Y/N, this is too much."

"Nonsense! You said you needed all this shit so I got it for you!"

"...did you pay for any of it?"

"...maybe, maybe not. You can't prove anything!"

"Babes, you know I love it when you get me alchemy stuff, but can you at least try to pay for it?"

"...with money I've stolen or..."

"Oh my god. You're impossible."

"You know you love me!"

The first thing you ever bought with your own money was new alchemy beakers for him

You also find little things for Rapunzel to bribe her into letting you date Varian

Eugene and Lance tell you stories about their thieving days and you take notes on what got them caught

You eventually win Ruddiger and Max over using stolen apples

Varian demands you come back every time you get injured so he can take care of you, and while he wouldn't know if you didn't, it goves you an excuse to come back to visit

"Babes, I get that it's dangerous on the high seas, but how the fuck do you get so injured? It's almost like you do it on purpose..."

"Well, you're not really wrong there..."

"Y/N! THAT'S NOT GOOD!"

"Whaaaaat? It gives me an excuse to come back and see your handsome face."

"And while I love seeing you, there has to be a different way."

"This is nothing. This stab wound is practically nothing compared to what I've had to deal with before. Besides..."

"Let me guess, I should see the other guy? Also, that isn't comforting or surprising in the slightest and I can't decide which is worse."

"Ding ding ding! I'll be fine! 'Tis but a scratch."

"Not just a scratch. Your shirt is covered in dried blood."

"Most of it isn't mine..."

"Y/N!"

Cassandra joined your crew at one point while on her travels

You noticed her name was familiar from Varian's stories about her, but didn't question it

Cassandra's a common enough name, right? She wasn't the same one who kidnapped your partner and almost killed him?

To be fair, you almost had the first time you guys met

He had seen your sword and wanted to get a closer look

He had barely put a finger on it before you had shoved him against the wall and put it against his neck.

He was down bad immediately.

"No one touches my fucking sword except me or the people who get it in the gut. Got it?"

"L-loud and clear."

"Alright. Can I buy you a drink? That got a little out of hand there."

"That would be nice."

She caught you writing a letter to Varian one time and you guys found out how you know about her

"Whoa, what's that?"

"Believe it or not, Cassandra, but it's a letter. For someone really important to me."

"Oh do tell. Who is so special that they've got the mighty Captain Y/N blushing like a small child?"

"First, I'm blushing like a Captain. Second, if you really need to know, his name is Varian."

"Oh my god, wait. Varian?"

"Yeah?"

"Kinda short, black hair with a blue stripe in the bangs, raccoon with him all the time, absolutely loves alchemy?"

"Wait, do you know him?!"

"Know him? I almost killed that little shit!"

"Wait a minute, YOU'RE THAT CASSANDRA?!"

"HE TALKS ABOUT ME?!"

"He said something about a kidnapping some years back. Said you were a great friend until you got corrupted and then un-corrupted."

"Huh. Would've expected a worse report from him."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's all for now! I'll add more if I think of them!

Taglist: @ask-qiqi @kxgaminerin @nocturne-the-raven

[kaysfanficcorner]

Out of This World Chapter 7: Stellar

Author’s Note: Well, here we are. From here on out this story is going to be SPICY. As we make our way into the events of season two, be ready for things to heat up considerably. I’m both nervous and thrilled to share this chapter with you, so please be kind and above all else ENJOY! My use of Mando’a is about to ramp up as well, and I’ve attempted to to give definitions within the story itself, but if I use any words you aren’t familiar with feel free to ask me about it. As always, if you want to join the Taglist please let me know!

Jate - Good Ca - Night Elek - Yes Ad - Son

Summary: As we make our way into the events of season two, things between the Mandalorian and the Earthling start to really heat up.

Pairing: Din Djarin X Female Earthling Reader

Warnings: Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Light action violence, Nudity, Graphic depictions of sex. SMUT AND FLUFF ABOUND 🌶️

If you are under the age of 18 you are prohibited from this work of fiction.

Music Inspiration

We Might Even Be Falling In Love - Themes inspired

Music Inspiration

Stellar - Title inspired by, themes inspired

AO3

Original OOTW Fanart by Justin Wood (at the end)

*****

Life back on the Razor Crest feels incredibly strange after all that has changed. You feel like a different version of yourself when you once again climb the ramp to the ship you now openly consider to be your home. You’d left it feeling like a shell of a person after killing Ranik and now you’re returning with a stronger disposition, determined to become a warrior in your own right. Determined to feel like you can pull your weight around the ship as an equal to the Mandalorian. You’d also left the Razor Crest completely unsure of where you and Din stood with each other. The mild flirting and signals here or there had been maddening, and now the two of you are closer than you were before. Which is maddening for entirely different reasons. 

You’re so happy to be reunited with your cat that you spend a good ten minutes carrying her around the ship, until she gets restless enough to pry herself from your arms. Jupiter is thrilled in her own feline way to have everyone back on board, and the kid is just as thrilled to be back home with her. Similarly to yourself, the little green child won’t leave her alone for the first few days out in space. 

On the second day after Nevarro, you even walk in on the kid using his powers to grab at Jupiter’s tail from a few feet away. Every time the poor orange feline meows and tries to whip around to slash at an assailant that isn’t actually there, the kid giggles. You’d scooped him up and giggle too, before booping him on the nose and lightly telling him he shouldn’t use his powers to mess with people or animals. 

The Space RV is pretty much just how it had been left, save for the little tune ups here and there that were ordered. Being back on board is both a comfort to you, and a frustration. Frustration eventually evolves into aggravation, and it isn’t until a few weeks have gone by that you come to terms with why you’re so fucking irritable all the sudden. 

It’s Din.

You came back to the Razor Crest assuming that things were going to continue to feel the way that they had on Nevarro, that Din would continue you dote on you with the soft side of his personality that is only ever meant for you or the kid to experience. Somehow what you end up getting from your cosmic companion is the complete opposite. He’s not touchy feely anymore, and the words of affection have drifted from his tongue.

As the weeks drag on, you sincerely miss the inn on Nevarro. Comfortable bed aside, now that you’re home on the Space RV, you and Din no longer sleep next to one another. It’s back to taking turns in the cot. You’d gotten used to the feeling of your bodies intertwining as you both drifted off to sleep, and it’s hard for you to find comfort in your nightly rest without it. Sometimes he’d spoon you, others you’d been the one holding him. If you had to choose a favorite position, holding Din while he fell asleep would hands down be the winner. Feeling his body relax against you, limbs twitching here and there as his mind switches over from consciousness to unconsciousness, is something you’d come to treasure by the end of the week long stay on your beloved lava planet. 

As upset as you are that you’re not going to be able to sleep next to Din like that any time soon, you’re even more upset that you never got around to sleeping with Din while having such a luxurious bed at your disposal. With the kid around there was just never a good time to try again. 

Being home, it’s painfully obvious that there aren’t a ton of comfortable places to have a sexual encounter on the Crest. Declarations of mutual attraction and a week of fluffy little moments had been absolutely lovely, but you’re dying to consummate whatever this is between the two of you. Wondering when or if a good time for it will ever present itself is making you extremely antsy, and its becoming impossible to hold it in around the increasingly grumpier Din Djarin you find yourself stuck with. It’s driving you nuts, to the point where now you’re just getting pissed off about it.

Perhaps he’s dealing with similar frustrations about what’s going on between you. Perhaps it’s the fact that he’s got your makeshift family on a wild goose chase to drop off one of it’s members with complete strangers. More than likely, as it is with yourself, its a combination of the two things. 

You’re perfectly aware that aside from the issues going on between the adults, a part of your heart shatters every single time you share a loving moment of fondness with the child. That being said, your only goal in regards to the little foundling is to love him and enjoy your remaining time together. 

Which is one of the reasons why, today, you’re so pissed off at Din that you could punch that fucking helmet off of his head and risk breaking your own hand in the process. It’s as if he’s actively trying not to enjoy his time with anyone. 

The Razor Crest is parked at a star port for a quick refuel, and so you insist that loading up on some more food and supplies for the cat is a necessity. Din just seems completely irritated with you when you suggest this, and it’s all you can do not to snap at him. 

With a huff you tell him, “I’ll just go take care of it myself, you don’t have to come.” 

“Absolutely not,” he counters, arms crossed over his chest. 

You roll your eyes so hard that you nearly pull an ocular muscle. “Okay, then come on. The sooner we get this over with the sooner we can get back on the road.”

“Fine,” Din agrees, voice dripping with animosity.

Between you, the child can sense your friction and his ears are casting downward as he frowns. He clearly dislikes his humans being snippy with one another.  You sense this, so you scoop him up into your arms and begin walking down the ramp. 

“Shouldn’t we use the pram?” Din asks, watching the two of you walk off. 

You call over your shoulder, “Screw the pram. Just come on.” 

And so you’re forced to shop for food with an uninterested, grumpy Mandalorian hovering over your shoulder and you feel as if you’re going to explode at any minute. Fighting with Din is the last thing you want, but if you aren’t able to have a conversation with him about what his problem is you’re afraid it’s going to come to that sooner rather than later.

What you really don’t understand is why a conversation hasn’t been had already. Aside from that first awkward month of living together, the communication between yourself and Din has been pretty good up to this point. Why it feels like you suddenly can’t approach him, you do not know. It’s starting to make your fight or flight instincts want to kick in, reminding you of what it felt like to constantly be on edge around your toxic family. Din is far from toxic, but it triggers you nonetheless.

So you try your hardest to ignore him, juggling the baby on one hip as you look at he various foods before you. The shop on the star port is small, and much like gas stations on the side of big highways back on Earth, the food seems both overpriced and unhealthy compared to the various fresh markets you’ve been to. 

“Would your son like a free sample?” A voice suddenly catches your attention.

You look up from the vegetables to see an attractive young human man behind the counter. His dark skin is in contrast from his white hair and light blue eyes, and he’s dressed very plainly. A kind simile graces his features as he holds out what looks like a fried frog leg on a stick towards the baby, who is in turn grasping for it hungrily. 

“What? Oh,” you hear yourself still sounding on edge so you try to force your voice to become pleasant with a fake smile plastered to your face. “Uh, yes thank you. He’s constantly hungry so I can’t say no to free food.” 

“Here you go little fella,” the man says, smiling down at the kid as he hands it to him. “You have a beautiful family, ma’am.”

The compliment causes your chest to swell and you squeeze the kid tighter. Just as you’re about to say thank you and move on, the man speaks again.

“What’s his name?” 

Then the tightness in your chest drops down into your stomach, a feeling of dread washing over you. How fucking embarrassing, even though it’s no one’s fault that neither you nor Din know the kid’s actual name. You fumble around for a quick answer, “Oh, well you know how it is with babies. He’s got a ton of nicknames. We hardly ever call him his real name because I can’t stop calling him ‘Green Bean’ at the moment.”

The man laughs, throwing his head back a little. “Oh, I get it. My wife can’t stop calling our little one ‘chubby cheeks.’ I keep telling her it’s going to give the kid a complex but she doesn’t listen.” He looks past you to where Din is standing behind and to your right side, “I’m sure you can relate, sir.” 

You look back to Din, making a face that hopefully reads as “just play along”. The beskar helmet looks at you for a long moment, his shoulders squaring. Eventually he looks to the vendor with a shrug, “I try not to fight her on much.”

You can’t help but feel that his statement was directed at you just as much as the vendor, hoping that this is him making an attempt to address the misplaced bitterness between you. If it is, his timing really does suck. The kid is already done with his frog leg, so you take the pointy stick from him before he accidentally pokes himself.

With another laugh, the kind vendor nods his head, “I should try that with my wife and see if it gets me out of trouble more often.” The man reaches below the counter and pulls out another of the free samples. “Here, have another leg for Green Bean. On the house.” 

“Thank you,” you say, smiling brightly at the man. As annoyed as you had been when you entered the shop, having a friendly human encounter has helped to liven you up a little. You look down at the child in your arms, jerking your head towards the man. “Say bye, Green Bean.” 

The kid complies, ears shifting as he looks to the man with a big smile on his tiny mouth. He gurgles and makes a few noises, using his free hand to wave up at the nice man. 

You make a few more purchases, including more protein packs for Jupiter, and when you have everything on your list you inform Din and the child that it’s time to head back to the ship. Once the group is no longer around other people in the sanctity of the Razor Crest, you look down at the baby on your hip and lift him up so that you can kiss him on the head. “I wish we knew your real name, buddy. Sorry we have to call you ‘Green Bean’ or ‘the kid’ all the time.”

Din walks up beside you and speaks in a low voice. “I wish you wouldn’t do that,” his tone is sharp. 

Great, you think sarcastically. With a sigh, you stop what you’re doing and turn to look up at him. “Do what, Din?” 

“Pretend that we’re his parents,” he says flatly, irritation floating just bellow the surface.

“I didn’t feel like explaining the real situation to that guy,” you offer lamely. 

“You could have just declined his offer and moved on.”

“The kid was hungry.” 

“You enjoyed it when that man called him your son,” Din’s voice sounds like it’s on the edge of control.

“Oh my God,” you groan with frustration, “yes! Okay? I did. Is that such a crime? I’ve practically been his foster mother for months. And like it or not you’ve been his foster father for much longer than that. I love him as if he was mine, and I’m not going to apologize for that.”

“It is irresponsible,” Din quietly seethes, you can practically hear his jaw clenching under the helmet.

“What is?” It’s all you can do not to raise your voice, “Giving him a home full of love? Letting him be a child?”

The kid makes a sad little noise between you and you both stop to look down at his distressed face. A feeling of guilt arises in your chest, having never wanted to make the kid feel as uncomfortable as you did when your own parents would fight in your presence.

“We shouldn’t do this in front of him,” Din finally says after a long moment of silence. He reaches out to touch one of the child’s downcast ears. The kid is clearly upset. “It’s okay, pal. We aren’t fighting.” 

You drop your voice even lower as your eyes fill with tears. “We kind of are, Din. I hate this. Why are we being so cold towards each other? This isn’t us. At least, I didn’t think it was.”

He sighs heavily, “You’re right. This isn’t us. I’m sorry.” 

“I’m sorry too,” you move closer to him, grabbing one of his gloved hands. “But I’m not sorry for how I treat this child. What if we take him to these Jedi people and they aren’t who we think they are? Or what if they are great, but the kid still doesn’t like it? Don’t you want him to know that he has a place to come back to where he is loved?”

“I…” Din seems to falter for a second before dipping his head towards his foster son, “Yes. I want him to know that. I want you to know that, buddy. ” 

You squeeze his hand tighter, looking into the visor as you speak. “Think about us, what our childhoods looked like. We didn’t get to enjoy being kids for very long. I couldn’t live with myself if I thought I was denying him the right to actually be a child while he’s in my care. I realize that when we do find the Jedi, its going to be extremely hard on all of us. And I realize that the more attached we get to each other, the harder it’s going to be to say goodbye. I know that this is going to be especially hard on you as the one who’s been caring for him the longest, but pretending that you don’t have feelings wrapped up in this isn’t going to make it any easier. We owe to to him as well as ourselves to treat him with love. Is he not an integral member of your two person clan?”

“It’s already hard,” Din says, voice choked, “I am going to miss him.” 

“I’m going to miss him too,” you agree, misty eyes threatening to boil over as you cradle the child between the two of you. Din places a hand to the back of his tiny head so that you are both holding him. “But as long as he knows he can always be a part Clan Mudhorn, we may not have to miss him forever.” 

Din seems to agree with this, gently touching his beskar forehead to the child’s fleshy one as he speaks to him in Mando’a. “Ni kar’tayl gar darasuum, ner ad.”

You’ve been studying very basic phrases, numbers, and the Mando’a alphabet since leaving Nevarro, but what Din just said is almost completely lost on you. Not wanting to break from this tender moment, you decide that asking for a definition can wait until later. Instead you snuggle into the small group embrace, whispering to the green child that you love him dearly. 

“It’s nice to have you back,” you tell your Mandalorian after he lifts up to pull apart from you. His body language is more akin to the Din you know, less stiff.

“Thank you for reminding me to be here,” Din replies. 

You set the kid down between you, letting him waddle off to find Jupiter or something to mess with that he shouldn’t. You look at Din, opening your arms to offer him a real hug. “Still friends?” 

He nods, pulling your body against him, “Elek, ner burc’ya.”

Instead of responding with the word in basic, you decide to reply to him with the Mando’a word for good, “Jate. I am sorry for letting my bitchiness get the better of me. It was not easy to go from having you feel like my partner on Nevarro to unexpectedly getting the cold shoulder for over half a month.”

“I thought I needed to pull away,” Din confirms.

“Yeah, well next time you feel the urge to pull away can we try to talk about it first?”

“I will try,” he sighs, “I’m not good at this.”

“You were doing great on Nevarro. Real boyfriend material.” Cringing, you wish to hell that you hadn’t just said that last part. If this thing between the two of you does end up progressing even further, boyfriend is the absolute wrong term for a man like Din. It sounds so… Earthy.

Din squeezes you, “On Nevarro things didn’t feel real. It felt like time had stopped and all there was, was you, me, and the kid. I could have stayed there forever, and when I realized this it unsettled me.”

You can’t help but chuckle a little, “Aww, Din. You had the post-vacation blues. It happens to everyone, totally normal.”

“I did not care for it.” 

*****

A few more weeks go by and things between you and Din have improved considerably. He’s no longer shutting you out or acting cold, and the communication between you is more at the surface. 

Unfortunately, though, the two of you have still yet to take any measures to further your budding relationship along. Now that you’re no longer irritated with him, you really just wish that you could fuck him already. It’s getting to the point where it’s actively a problem. 

Din seems to be able to tell that something is up with you, because he eventually calls you out on it when the two of you are practicing with whipchord launchers on the lower deck of the ship. He’s begun training you on the various weapons that a Mandalorian considers to be essential, and up until now you’ve been incredibly enthusiastic. Even though a lot of what he’s trying to teach you does not come naturally, and most days you end up both exhausted and vexed, you approach every one of his lessons with respect.

Today, however, all the fervor has drained from you. The whipchord launcher seems impossible to use, and Din’s so fucking mesmerizing that you you could care less about weaponry. Watching him move so effortlessly to shoot his whipchord at the makeshift dummy he’d set up only serves to cause your mind to wander to lewd places. Horny and nonplused, your heart just isn’t in training and it must be obvious.

“What’s going on with you?” Din asks, stopping mid sentence when he figures out that you haven’t been listening. 

“Sorry, I’m just in a mood,” you explain with a half hearted shrug, “I swear I’m trying to pay attention.”

His shoulders soften a little as he looks you over, “Is it anything I can help with?” 

You stare at him for a long moment, knowing full well that the kid is within earshot only a few feet away. He’s curled up in the cot with his meerkat toy and his silver ball, watching you and his dad with huge eyes. Considering your words carefully, you say, “Actually you’re the only one who can help with this particular problem, but it’s most definitely not the right time to talk about this.”

Din follows your gaze to his foundling, then his silver head snaps back to you, “Oh.”

“I can’t help it that you’re really attractive and distracting,” you smirk a little, bouncing on the balls of your feet as you watch him.

“Mm,” Din seems to consider his own words carefully before responding to you. “Tell you what, if you can master the whipchord while overcoming your distraction, I’ll let you jump the Razor Crest into hyperdrive by yourself. A warrior must learn to fight in spite of distractions, to purge them from the mind completely in the face of battle.” 

“Deal, Chrome Dome,” you agree with a grin. You’ve been practicing your flying almost daily, but he’s barley let you touch anything in the cockpit without his strict supervision.

And so you practice over and over again, listening to every word Din says to you. Each syllable you let soak in with respect, ignoring the fact that he now seems to be purposefully doing things to distract you. He keeps flexing as he shows you the controls or titling his head a certain way. Then you know he’s really trying to get under your skin when he comes up behind you to adjust the forearm holding the spare vambrace he’d given you, and he gently presses his slight bulge into your ass. 

Even though you can’t see his face, you know for a fact that he’s enjoying every moment of tormenting you. It’s all over his body language, which you’re getting increasingly better at reading. Who knew that Din Djarin has a wicked side. 

Eventually you’re able to successfully launch the chord at the dummy, watching as it wraps around it just the way Din showed you. You try to yank the thing forward and knock it onto its side, simulating the act of pulling an enemy to the ground in one fell swoop. But nothing happens, much to your shock and disappointment. As hard as you’re trying, you just can’t seem to get this right. 

“Ugh,” you groan.

“It’s okay, Cyar’ika,” your cosmic companion comforts, a hand on your shoulder as he peers down at you. You can see your frustration in the silver reflection. “You’ll get it eventually,” he adds. Obviously you have no idea what his face is doing behind the beskar barrier, yet for some reason you feel as if he’s looking at you fondly. 

You repeat this action until it’s almost coming naturally, and Din decides that he’s pleased with enough with your progress that he declares the training session to be over. After cleaning up and putting the dummy away, you both realize that the kid is napping in the cot. The two of you decide to leave him there as you climb up to the cockpit one at at time.

Once upstairs, you look to Din with a sigh, “Sorry about getting distracted earlier. I was definitely on edge.”

“You’re still on edge,” Din observes, “Your body is very tense.”  

“Yeah I guess you’re right,” you mumble, moving forward to wrap your arms around his waist. “I miss sleeping next to you.”

Din’s arms find you, “I miss that as well. But I know that’s not where this tension is coming from. You’ve been like this for the last couple of days.” 

Cheeks flushing, you burry your head into his shoulder with a groan. “Am I that obvious?”

“You’ve been giving off signals,” the Mandalorian chuckles a little. “But I am not without tension of my own. I’m sorry that there hasn’t been a good moment for us to resume what we started on Nevarro.” 

“It’s no one’s fault,” you pull apart from him slightly to look right into the visor. “I think I’m just psyching myself out about it.”

“I don’t understand the phrase.”

“I just mean I’m overthinking it, and subsequently second guessing myself. I haven’t had a partner in almost three years, so I’m worried that I’m a little rusty in the sheets.”

Din scoffs a little, shaking his head, “I have similar worries. I have not… been with another in nearly ten cycles.”

“Fuck, that’s a long time,” you utter softly, wondering how uncomfortable this conversation is for him as he confesses this to you.

Din nods, voice wavering as he speaks, “It hasn’t been entirely up to chance that we have not moved forward. I have not pursued connection with another in so long. Worry of my own inadequacy has been on my mind, preventing me from pursuing you.”

Brow furrowing as you regard your very good friend and possible lover, you reach out to trail delicate fingers over the black visor of his silver helmet as if touching his brow. “Then let’s not rush this. It can happen when the timing feels right for the both of us.” 

The Mandalorian leans his head forward to knock lightly into yours, and a warm smile finds it’s way to your lips. No amount of Mandalorian head butts you receive from him are ever too much. 

“I know we had a deal but I’d still like to see you jump the ship by yourself. Do you remember what we went over when I last showed you the hyperdrive?” Din asks, lifting up to his full height again as he moves over to the pilot’s seat. 

You follow, coming to stand beside him as you look over the many lighted controls. “We talked about how to enter in jump coordinates into the navigational computer.” 

Din takes a seat, pulling you down with him so that you’re seated in his lap. “Correct. Do you think you can enter them in without my help?”

You nod, “Yeah, I think so.” 

It sounds like there is a smile riding the tone of his voice, “I want you to enter in these coordinates and jump us there.”

A little orange holographic display pops up from Din’s left vambrace, letters and numbers written in Mando’a. You can read some of it, but you squint at it for a moment before you turn your head to look at him. It’s taking most of your will power to ignore the feeling in your belly that stirs from being seated on his warm legs. His lap is comfortable, even with the hard beskar upon his thighs.

“I can only read some of that. I know there’s a x, a three, a four, and a nine.”

“You’ve been studying,” Din says fondly, switching the holograph over to basic so you can read it clearly. The basic alphabet is something you’d memorized with Cara prior to meeting your Mandalorian.

“Learning Mando’a is important to me,” you reply with equal fondness. Neither of you says anything else as you lean forward to begin entering in the coordinates into the computer. Din’s hands come to rest comfortably on your waist as you fumble a little bit with the typing, still not used to all of the symbols yet. Eventually you have the correct information inputed into the system, and then your hand lingers over the button which will jump the ship to those coordinates through hyperspace. You look back to Din and wait for him to give you the okay.

“Punch it, Cyar’ika.” 

The ship lurches forward as stars begin their dance all around your metal home, an incredible sense of pride washing over you. Successfully jumping the Razor Crest feels like such an achievement. 

When the jump is over in a few hours, Din helps you to bring the ship out of hyperspace. Now the kid is awake again and in his usual seat with Jupiter, so you’re seated in the pilot seat without the added cushion of one Din Djarin. The Mandalorian in question tells you that you’ve jumped the ship just outside the atmosphere of a planet on the outskirts of the outer rim, and that he’s brought all of you there so he can question a crime lord named Gor Koresh about where to find other Mandalorians. There have been rumors that Koresh is an underground beskar dealer, and Din thinks that he may have leads.

According to Din, if he can navigate through the various Mandalorian coverts scattered across the galaxy, then maybe he’ll have a better chance of finding a Jedi. Perhaps one of his own kind has information on where to find such a being. He’s made these Jedi people sound like literal space wizards when trying to explain it to you with what little knowledge he has on the subject, and if you weren’t sour about the fact that the purpose of finding one is to give them the kid, you’d probably be pretty excited to see what a space wizard looks like.

Din assists you in bringing the Razor Crest in for a landing, something you’re only starting to feel slightly comfortable doing, and then the two of you take the kid and the cat downstairs to discuss the plan. 

“Follow my lead,” Din says as he hands over your blaster. He also hands you the small dagger you’ve been practicing with and the old whipchord vambrace you’d used earlier. “Do not say anything that’ll get us into trouble, and above all else stay calm. There’s a good chance that this could turn into an ambush for my armor, so try your best to remain unperturbed if things go south.” 

You nod, holstering the blaster before strapping the vambrace to your forearm. This one isn’t made of beskar, but you still feel somewhat official adhering it to your person. You’re in your favorite outfit, and it helps to make you feel more confident about going on a mission at Din’s side. You stick the dagger into the side of your right boot, grinning up at Din once you’re done. “I’m starting to feel like a badass, getting to go with you to do cool Mandalorian shit.”

“Don’t get too cocky either,” Din adds, sounding amused.  

With the child in his pram, the three of you make your way out of the ship and into the crime ridden streets of the city’s grungy warehouse district. Every run down building is riddled with graffiti, and you know that nothing good must happen in a place like this. It’s all very Gotham City in a weird sci-fi kind of way. 

“Yeesh,” you mumble to yourself, eyes flicking around in every direction as your guard moves up on high alert. 

Din seems to be purposefully staying under the dim street lamps, and you realize why as you see a glimmer of red to your right. It occurs to you that what you’re seeing is several sets of glowing eyes watching you from deep within a dark alley. When you hear the faintest growl coming from that direction, you quickly pick up the pace in order to keep closer to Mando. 

Eventually you come to a stop where a male Twi’lek, as you’ve learned they are called, is working as the doorman for some sort of seedy looking establishment. Din tells him that your group is there to see Gor Koresh, and you’re surprised that the doorman moves to the side without much of a second thought. You’d assumed it was going to be much harder than that to get in.

You and the kid follow your Mandalorian into some sort of underground wrestling match, and you feel even more like you’re in a Batman comic as you take in your surroundings. Aliens of all shapes and sizes are packed into the space, screaming with fistfuls of drinks and paraphernalia as two green pig-like men fight each other in the large ring. The room is smoky, stinking of sweaty men, alcohol, and blood. A cacophony that only seems to get louder the further you tread into the crowd begins to hurt your ears, leaving you to hope that the kid’s big green ones are doing okay. You can only imagine how loud this may sound to him. 

Being in a place like this is slightly exhilarating in spite of the nerves you feel. It reminds you of the one time you went to Earth wrestling, or some of the really low rent EDM shows from back in your early twenties. Except on Earth when you had gone to watch wrestling it was old dudes with metal folding chairs, not green Pumba-looking aliens with battle axes. 

When your group comes upon a cyclops alien with an open seat on either side and group of goons surrounding him, you assume this must be Koresh. Din takes one of the seats beside him and motions for you to take the seat on the other side, the two of you surrounding the stout man. You try your best to ignore the lecherous stares from some of the other men around you, focusing on Din and the business he is here to conduct. 

“This is no place for a child,” Koresh says, causing Din to straighten slightly.

“Where I go, he goes,” Din replies cooly.

The two of them talk things over for a while, until Koresh mentions Din giving his beskar armor up in exchange for information about the other Mandalorians. It’s all you can do not to chime in with something snarky, but you remember what Din had told you about not getting them into trouble. It seems that trouble comes regardless though, when Din says that he’s not going to leave his fate up to chance and Koresh agrees by pulling out a blaster. He shoots one of the wrestlers dead before pointing the blaster right at Din’s unprotected neck. 

If he were to fire, Din would be dead in an instant. 

Keep calm. Trust him, your voice is whispering inside your head, which also has a blaster pointed to it. All of the goons surrounding Koresh have drawn a weapon and are now pointing it at either Din or yourself. Any patrons who are not involved begin to scream and scatter from the building. 

Koresh gives some small speech about how beskar has been rising in price and that he’s become quite fond of it, while threatening to peel the armor from Din’s corpse if he doesn’t give it up. You notice that Din is calmly arming his whistling birds, and the kid sees it too as he closes himself inside the pram. Then, Gor Koresh turns to you for the first time since you’d sat next to him and places a hand on your upper thigh. He’s dangerously close to snaking a hand between your legs, and still you remain calm.

He makes a lewd remark about how he’ll take you as well if Mando is willing to give up just some of the beskar, and Din’s voice never falters as he speaks to the crime lord with an even but forceful tone.

“Tell me where the Mandalorians are, and I’ll walk out of here without killing you.”

Koresh scoffs, “I thought you said you weren’t the gambler.”

“I’m not.”

And with that, Din’s whistling birds take down all of Koresh’s goons who’d had you both at blaster point. Both of you are up from your seats immediately, and you manage to dip down and dodge the oncoming blow from an alien directly behind you. For a second you think of Ranik’s death by your hand on Nar Shaddaa. Then when your body begins to freeze up you’re somehow able to purge the feeling of fear from your system and focus on the situation at hand.

Out of the corner of your eye you can see that Din has his hands full, but your not worried about him as you continue to move away from the man before you and his oncoming attacks. While you are crouched down to avoid a high kick, you pull the dagger from your boot and jam it into his thigh just above the knee.  Howling in pain, he falls to the ground as you yank your dagger from his thigh and begin to lift yourself up. He attempts to lunge at you again, so you run the blade along his wrist before standing to your full height to move away from him. 

Glancing to Din to make sure he’s still okay, you notice that Koresh is using the fight as a distraction and he’s waddling off towards the back of the arena. Without thinking twice, you take off after him. The rest of the goons are attacking Din, so you’re able to slip away quite easily. Koresh is shuffling as hard as he can but his little legs don’t get the portly man far, so you’re able easily to follow him out into the street. Huffing and puffing, Koresh looks back at you and shouts as you lift your right forearm. Aiming as much as you can with a moving target, you initiate your whipchord and watch with glee as it wraps around Koresh’s legs on the first try. The alien falls to the ground with a grunt and a thud.

“Oh shit,” you exclaim, holding the chord tight, “I did it!”

You can feel the presence of another coming up behind you, but before you can react to a possible attack Mando’s modulated voice is in your ears. Upon hearing your cosmic companion, your body relaxes a little. 

“You caught him?” he sounds completely amazed.

“Yeah, holy shit!” 

You observe as Din takes the chord from you and swings the end of it up over the light post above your head, pulling Koresh up until he’s hanging upside down in front of you. Din ties him off and then comes to stand before him as he pleads for Din to stop.

“Serves you right for tying to buy me, creep,” you shove at the alien, making him swing a little. 

“I’ll tell you where he is, but you must give me your word that you will not kill me,” Koresh pleads, panting. 

The Mandalorian steadies him and looks down into the one upside down eye as he speaks evenly, “I promise you will not die by my hand. Now where is the Mandalorian you know of?”

“Tatooine.”

“What?!” 

“The Mando I know of is on Tatooine!”

“I’ve spent much time on Tatooine, I’ve never seen a Mandalorian there.”

“My information is good, I tell you! The city of Mos Pelgo. I swear it by the Gatra.”

“Tatooine it is, then.”

Koresh starts screaming for Mando to cut him down as your friend simply motions to you that your group is leaving. The kid’s pram is floating just behind Din as he walks off so you turn to follow as well. When Koresh screams that he can’t be left like that, Din turns back to the little one eyed man with his blaster raised. 

“That wasn’t part of the deal,” Din says cooly, and shoots the street light out. 

Koresh dangles there in the dark like a piece of meat, and you turn back for a moment to watch as he’s swarmed by those same red eyed creatures from the alley. You quickly spin around and catch up to Mando as the alien’s screams of agony echo behind you.

*****

“I’m going to put him down in the cot, I’ll be right back.” Din says, squeezing your shoulder with his free hand. The kid is sleeping in Din’s other arm and you just nod your head, on the verge of falling asleep yourself. 

Space RV is back in hyperspace and you’ve since cleaned yourself up from the fight in the arena. Dressed in comfortable clothes for sleeping, you feel almost cozy curled up in your blanket on the red leather seat. The Mandalorian only leaves you alone in the cockpit for a few minutes, and you start to nod off a little while he’s gone. But then he’s climbing the ladder again, his voice bringing you back to reality.

“Thank you for your help tonight,” he says, moving all the way into the small control room to join you. 

“You’re welcome,” you reply, throwing a sleepy little smile up his way. 

“The way you handled yourself was… exemplary. Taking the initiative to chase after Koresh, using the whipchord launcher just like we practiced. You kept calm even when we were being held at blasterpoint. I’m very proud of you, ner burc’ya.” 

As Din is saying all of this, showering you with compliments, he’s slowly dropping down to his knees in front of you. Positioning himself between your legs, Din’s tone of voice morphs into something akin to sultry, and he reaches a hand forward to cup your face. His gloves and most of his armor have been removed. 

“So fucking proud of you,” he says lowly, and your back straightens as his phrasing sobers you up from the sleepiness you’ve been feeling up to this point.

Din never uses that word in the way that you do. In fact, he’s only ever repeated it to you the one time after he had realized it’s definition. So when he says it right now it gets your full attention, causing you to sit up and look at him with raised eyebrows. The blanket falls from your shoulders in a clump behind you. 

“Yeah? You’re how proud of me?” You repeat back, scooting yourself forward so that your groin is right up against him. You place a hand on either side of his head and look straight down at the beskar, pleased when he doesn’t move to stop you like he had last time. He trusts that you are not trying to remove it, and that fact alone fills you with joy. 

The helmet in question tilts up at a sharp angle to look at you, “Take off your clothes and I’ll show you how proud I am.”

“What’s gotten into you? What happened to taking this slow?”

Din starts to lift the hem of your Bowie shirt, sliding his bare hands underneath the thin fabric as he inches it upwards. “Watching your bravery, seeing you use the skills that I’ve taught you. We felt like a team, like partners.”

“It was pretty nice to feel like I could be useful in a situation like that,” you agree, grinding your hips a little as you speak.

Din’s fingers continue pushing your shirt up until your breasts are exposed, stopping to tease both nipples with soft little pinches. “What I didn't like, was Koresh having the audacity to touch you.”

Your heart is beginning to beat faster, loving where this is going as you play dumb, “Yeah? Why’s that?”

“Don’t like people touching things that don’t belong to them,” he growls, lifting up to be more level with you as he pushes you back against the backrest of your red seat.

“And who do I belong to?”

“Me, Cyar’ika. You are mine,” Din’s voice is so lascivious, you feel as if your entire body could melt into goo right then and there.

“Tell me that again,” you demand as Din begins to yank the yoga pants and underwear from your waist.

He wiggles the fabric out from under your ass, leaning in towards you. “You are mine,” he repeats in that same lusty growl. 

You long to run your fingers through hair, his hair, so you squeeze the helmet tighter. “I’m all yours, but that means you have to be all mine.”

“Naturally,” he finishes disrobing your bottom half, discarding with your clothes behind him, “I belong to you.”

Feeling a chill run through you now that most of you is exposed to the cool air, a little moan escapes your lips. You let go of him and rip the shirt from your head before leaning back into the seat more as you spread your legs. Of course, your planet necklace is the only thing adorning your now nude form. “Mmm, tell me that you’re proud of me again. That I did a good job.” 

He’s beginning to unfasten his own pants, “I’m so fucking proud of you, Cyar’ika.”

“Show me, Din. Please,” you whine for him.

Din is almost fully dressed save for his hands, but now he’s pulling himself out and you really stop to appreciate how impressive he is when fully hard. Uncircumcised and quite large, he’s unlike any of the sexual partners you’ve been with in the past. The prospect of feeling him enter you is enough to make your entire body quiver with anticipation, core heating up rapidly.

“Oh, fuck,” you breathe, reaching out to take him into your hand. His entire body jerks forward when you make contact, a soft moan escaping him. “What is it, handsome?” Your voice is salacious.  

“Been so long,” he mutters, his own wanton voice strained and husky.

You begin to stroke him, loving the way he melts into your hands. He braces himself on your chair as you scoot yourself forward and slide off of it, landing softly on your butt so that you’re at eye level with the impressive appendage. Then you part your lips, tongue protruding, and the noise Din makes when you slide the tip of him into your mouth is one you plan to cherish forever. 

Hips bucking involuntarily, Din slides himself in and out as you gently suck. You’re careful not to use too much pressure or teeth, and under the beskar his eyes are rolling into the back of his head at the sensation. This doesn’t feel real. It’s got to be a dream, because nothing in his life has ever felt this fucking good. 

“It’s real, Din,” you say as you come up for air, saliva running from the corners of your slightly swollen lips. 

Had he said that out loud? He was sure that had been a private thought.

It doesn’t matter, all that matters is the pleasure he hasn’t felt in far too long. The dust and cobwebs have been cleared from his dormant libido, and he can feel a much older version of himself start to reawaken. Your mouth is lovely and warm and wet, but he’s suddenly ready to feel you clamp your muscles around him as you whine in ecstasy. 

Pulling out of your mouth with a small pop, he leans back and brings your blanket down with him. You watch him with hunger in your gorgeous eyes as he lays the thick black fabric down on the floor of the cockpit before guiding you to lay down on your back.

You allow him to gently push you down, spreading your legs as he positions himself between them. The floor is hard and unforgiving, and will likely fuck your back up for the following day, but in this moment both of could give a shit less.

“Tell me what you want, ner cyare,” Din demands, swollen cock in one hand as he hovers over you with his other hand finding your soft wetness. It’s not lost on you that he’s calling you a word you do not know, but that can wait. His fingers are grazing over the sensitive swollen flesh of your clit, and nothing else fucking matters anymore.

Hands at the base of his neck, you lift up to whisper into the right side of his helmet, “I want my Mandalorian to fuck me so hard that I forget my own name.” 

The heat between your legs only fires up more when you feel the tip of him press into your opening, and when you least expect it he thrusts all the way in. A gargled cry erupts from your throat, pain and pleasure both cascading through you as you realize you really haven’t taken anyone this big before. You’ve never been this full. 

“Oh fucking hell,” you grunt, wiggling your hips around to try and adjust to his size pushed all the way in.  

“You okay?” He pants above you. Fuck, if only you could feel his tongue in your mouth. 

“Don’t stop,” you grunt out again, “you’re just bigger than I’m used to.”

Din pumps in and out, slowly at first but soon his pacing picks up to a more feverish rhythm. Nothing about this is picturesque. It’s rough, and raw, and messy. Both of you are so full of passion that your movements are almost frantically out of sync for the first few minutes. Eventually though, you start to tune yourselves into each other. Your hips rock up to meet his has he thrusts forward, and when your legs wrap around his waist it feels like he enters you even deeper. It feels so intense that you dig your nails into his lower back under the shirt as a loud noise escapes you, louder than any of the noises you’ve made thus far. 

Din’s hand comes to clamp over your mouth, adding enough pressure to make you moan even louder against his palm. 

“Shh,” he coos, “don’t want to wake the kid.” 

With his hand stifling the obscene noises you’re unable to control, Din begins to really fuck you. No gentle thrusting, no consideration for your pain tolerance. He’s slamming into you with so much speed and force that you can barely keep your eyes open to look at him. You’re fully aware that you’re going to be sore tomorrow, but you adore every second of his rough handling of your body. It hurts, but in that way that you’ve learned to crave when it comes to sex. 

Then he suddenly pulls out, leaving you feeling empty as he releases you to the ground and sits back on his booted heels. “Shit,” he exclaims, breathing more heavily than you’ve ever heard him. His hands are on his knees as he hunches forward.

Din really had to force himself off of you, afraid that if it went any further he’d finish too soon.

You’re similarly worried, sitting up to look at him with your brow furrowed. This is the most unprotected you’ve ever been, and it’s only just now occurring to you that the two of you need to be careful. “Did you…?”

“Almost,” he’s still catching his breath, “Sorry for being so rough with you.” 

“You could be rougher,” you grin at him, “I’ve never been one for gentle sex.” 

Crawling forward, you plop down onto your stomach right in front of him and prop yourself up on your forearms. Hesitantly, as this side of Din is so new to you and you’re not sure what will go over well, you stick out your tongue and run it from the base of his lovely cock all the way up to the tip. His body shudders as he moans, and you’re so proud of yourself for being able to cause these reactions in him. 

“Mm, I taste so good on you,” you remark, smirking up at him as his head leans back to point up at the ceiling.

Din grunts out, “Oh fuck, Cyar’ika,” as his hips buck forward.

You take the opportunity to pull him all the way into your mouth, letting as much of his length as you can take slide down your throat. Bobbing, you begin to work his cock with your mouth and his hands come to grip at your hair. He pulls harder than you expect him to, but this only serves to kindle the blazing fire in your core as he helps guide your head up and down.

Then he yanks upward, causing you to pop off of him and look up. The beskar helmet is looking directly at you, and you whine a little bit just from the sight before your eyes. Din’s hardness in the foreground and the way his head is tilted down, you can only imagine what his face must look like riddled with lust.

“I want you to cum for me, Din,” you pant, mouth dripping.

He shakes his head, voice taking on a commanding tone that leaves you weak, “I’m not done with you yet. My chair. Now.”

Din never lets go of your hair, walking you on all fours across the short distance to the pilot’s seat. As uncomfortable as this is on your knees, you do not complain one bit. He’s handling you in the way you’ve been fantasizing about for months. You let him guide your naked body up on the seat, chest and stomach pressed down into the leather as you bend over it. 

Oh shit, he’s going to take you from behind. 

“Ner Mesh’la. Ner Cyare,” he croons, “tell me who you belong to.” He’s positioning himself at your opening once again, so you brace yourself against the seat as you turn to look back at your Mandalorian in all his glory. Din Djarin is absolutely fucking intoxicating like this, and now that you’re finally getting to experience it first hand, you feel as if you never want another person besides him to touch you for the rest of your life. 

“I belong to Din Djarin, the best fucking Mandalorian in the galaxy.”

“That’s right, Cyar’ika.” Din grasps onto one of your forearms with his free hand as he places it to your lower back and holds it there. “And who do I belong to?” 

“Me,” you moan, “you’re my Mandalorian, Din. All fucking mine.” 

The next words that flow from Din’s mouth come so naturally that he doesn’t stop to second guess himself. He unabashedly says how he feels, how he’s been feeling. “Ni kar’tayl gar darasuum.”

You’re squirming beneath him, pushing your ass out. “Quit teasing me,” you whine.

“Don’t get mouthy,” he reprimands lightly, spanking your ass once for good measure. 

“Oh shit,” you squeak, looking back at him with a devilish little grin.

“Mm, my girl did so well tonight,” Din says as he begins to slowly push himself into you once more. “So fucking proud of my beautiful fucking girl. My girl deserves everything she wants.”

You feel your body envelope him, and everything else fades away besides Din Djarin. The sensation of his voice and the words he’s saying paired with the feeling of fullness in your core nearly sends you over the edge. This is the closest you’ve ever been to having an orgasm from another person’s involvement, let alone just from penetration. Your free hand moves to play with yourself, hoping to coax climax on if you can.

Then Din starts to pump again, pulling back slowly and then slamming his hips into you at nearly full force. He purposely tortures you with every thrust, loving how much you squirm and quiver each time he gradually pulls out. He really is close, and knows he can’t go on much longer, but he intends to savor every second that he’s inside of you and the effect it has on your body. Your tight wetness is so inviting that he feels like he could move in and never leave.

“Your girl wants you to fuck her harder,” you eventually plea, voice dripping with need. 

So Din gladly complies, grabbing both of your hips to steady himself as his movements become relentless. He goes for as long as he possibly can, until he’s dangerously teetering on the edge and has to rip himself from you at the last minute. It’s over so fast, orgasm rocking his body completely as he leans his helmeted head on the small of your back and empties himself onto the floor between your knees with several soft moans. He’ll be sure to clean that up later.

Once he catches his breath, he’s lifting himself from your back to sit on the floor. You slide from the chair, coming to sit on your blanket directly in front of him. Your hair is a mess and your face is flushed, and Din is so enamored with your appearance that he wishes he could kiss you. Truly kiss you.

“How’s my Mando doing?” You ask, leaning forward to kiss his messy tip and lick up some of the remnants. His body shakes violently, a strangled little noise escaping him. 

“He’ll let you know when he can think clearly again,” Din eventually chuckles, adrenaline slowly beginning to ebb from him. “That was…”

“Good?” You offer, looking hopeful. 

“Magnificent,” he counters, head moving as he looks you up and down. “Did you…?

You grin, “Did I enjoy it? Din, I don’t think there are words for how much I enjoyed that.” 

Din wishes you could see his own grin. “I’m glad, Cyare. But I was asking if you finished.” 

Then your face falters, souring for a moment before you force a smile back to your lips. Din’s heart drops as a certain awkwardness washes over you. “No, I didn’t. I was close at one point, but its okay. I’m probably not going to.” 

“What do you mean?”

You sigh, avoiding his gaze, “I’ve been having sex since I was nineteen, and I’ve never been able to cum when I’m with someone. If I’m alone it happens like it’s nothing, but if I’m with another person it’s like I get close but that’s all that ever happens. A guy went down on me for a full hour once and I still couldn’t climax. I don’t know if it’s that my body just freezes up or I’ve never had a true connection with anyone or what.”

“Your body was hardly frozen,” Din remarks, mulling over this information. His own orgasm feels lessened knowing that you did not experience the same amount of pleasure from the encounter. “You deserve to feel good as well.”

You shake your head, “I do feel good. I don’t have to finish to have good sex with you. And please know, that was very good sex.”

Din’s not taking no for an answer, he’s determined to make this right. “Is there anything more I can do?”

“Unfortunately not with the helmet on,” you say, squeezing his hand. “But it’s not important. I’ve already written that off.”

“What are you talking about?” He asks, but then once he really thinks about it the realization dawns on him. You’re suggesting he preform oral on you. Something he’s only aware of, certainly nothing he’s ever had a chance to try. Xi’an used to beg him to do that for her, but being true to the creed he’s never had sex without his helmet. “Oh.”

“Yeah, so out of respect for you lets not even go there. We should just stop talking about it all together. It’s off the table.” You wave him off as if you really are unconcerned, but Din can see the smallest glimmer of disappointment in your eyes and he simply cannot let this stand. 

There’s got to be something he can do instead. He looks around the cockpit as if anything in this room could aid him, and then his eyes land on the pinkish-purple scarf that was given to you on Nevarro. You had recently tied it around the headrest of your seat and declared that you were decorating your space, but now Din thinks of a better purpose the piece of fabric could serve. He refers back to the dream about you that he had right after Nar Shaddaa, and a part of him wonders if this idea is actually taking things too far. Then he looks over your naked body and he suddenly doesn’t care.

It very well could be taking things too far, but that doesn’t seem to matter as Din feels himself moving towards it before the rest of his mind can catch up. He yanks at the fabric until it loosens away from the seat, and then he moves to sit in front of you. 

“What are you doing?” You ask, eyeing the scarf skeptically.

“Do you trust me?” Din asks, ignoring your question. You nod, so he continues, “I will not let this happen lightly. If we do this, I need you to vow to me that you will continue to uphold your respect for my way of life.”

“I promise,” you whisper, eyes widening.

Din folds the fabric in fourths longways, holding one end in each hand. His face is completely serious below the beskar. “I have no idea what I’m doing, so this might not even work. But I do not wish to see you disappointed, and I would very much like to know what you taste like.” 

You seem to react to this, face melting into the same one that was full of lust just a few moments ago. “Only if you’re one hundred percent sure.” 

“I am,” he nods, “Turn around and face that way.” 

You comply, moving your body to face in the opposite direction. Din lifts the fabric of the scarf above your head and comes to a stop right in front of your face. You nod once, so Din gently places the fabric over your eyes and ties it tightly behind your head. 

“Too tight?”

“No it feels fine.”

“Can you see anything?”

“Not at all, its totally dark under this thing.”

When you eventually hear the hiss of his modulator and the sound of metal clunking to the ground, a thrill runs through your body. Gooseflesh prickles all the way up your arms and legs, up your spine, and comes to rest at the back of your head. The tingling sensation you feel all over is maddening, and he hasn’t even touched you yet.

“Are you okay, Cyare?” His voice sounds completely the same while also sounding so different. Without the speakers of the modulator, it sounds more human. More tangible. 

“Whoa, your voice sounds different. I… did you really take it off, Din?” Blanketed in darkness, you’re not sure if what you’re hearing is real. 

“I did,” his voice is suddenly in front of you, much closer than it was a moment ago. 

Then you feel hands in your hair, and something fleshy brushes up against your nose. “Is that…?”

One of the hands in your hair moves to grab hold of one of yours, gently lifting your fingers upwards until they come in contact with skin. 

“My nose,” Din says, trailing your fingers over more skin and you giggle at the feeling of prickly facial hair. Then you’re touching what feels like lips, and this is only confirmed for you when they part slightly and you can feel the heat of his breath. He kisses your fingertips, “My lips.”

“My lips wouldn’t mind getting to know yours a little,” you say with a small laugh, gasping at the end of your sentence when he cups your face and pulls it forward slightly. 

“I have not done this since I took the oath,” he says, sounding almost awkward and unsure of himself.

You smile, “I don’t have any expectations, Din. I just want you to be yourself.”

Then your lips are captured in his and suddenly the reality of what is going on really kicks in. Din has taken his helmet off, you are blindfolded to be kept from seeing his face, and he is kissing you. Something that you assumed would never happen, and had come to terms with long before anyone admitted their feelings for the other.

Just as it had been when you were having sex, the movements are feverish and all over the place but soon enough the two of you find rhythm with one another again. Your tongue snakes out from behind your teeth, slowly entering his warm mouth as his own tongue runs over yours in exploration. You think idly that he tastes of caf and something else you can’t place. He moans against you, so you take it that he enjoys your advances. Cradling his face in either hand, you push yourself forward to really get leverage in the kiss. The facial hair feels so nice against your hands, his mustache tickling your nose. 

Then he pulls away, a hand to your chest as he gently coaxes you to lay down. You whine a little, openly pouting. Din growls, and the hand on your chest increases pressure. 

“I want my mesh’la girl to feel good,” he declares, and you finally give in to the hand pushing you down onto your back. 

His lips travel down your neck, pecking every few inches until he makes his way to your breasts. Licking at one of your nipples, he then takes it into his mouth as he nibbles lightly. It sends you into a tizzy until he pulls away. 

“Kissing you felt really good,” you finally counter, grinning in his general direction as you lay there. “I was ready to go on for the rest of my life not knowing what that feels like and now you’ve spoiled me and I don’t think I can live without it.” 

A hand moves your left leg outward. “Let me spoil you even more, Cyare.” Then another hand moves your right leg, spreading you open. Nothing happens for a moment, until you hear the distant sound of Din inhaling deeply through his nose. “Delicious,” he breathes, referring to the scent of you.

His movements are hesitant at first and when you feel the warmth of his wet tongue for the first time you jump a little, flinching away with a sharp noise when his facial hair tickles the sensitive flesh between your legs. Before he can stop and ask if you’re okay, you assure him that you’re fine and urge him to keep going. You have to consciously keep your legs spread, fighting the instinct to clamp your thighs around his unsuspecting head as he tentatively runs his tongue from the base of your entrance all the way up to the clit. Din repeats this motion several times, before showing complete attention to the swollen nub. You can tell that he’s not sure of himself, that he’s truly never done this before, so you decide to coach him a little bit. 

“Mm, oh fuck,” you croak out between moans, “when you swirled your tongue there it felt so-oh god-so fucking good. Try to focus your attention there as much as possible.”

Din carries on with the same strokes of the tongue, and then suddenly you feel a finger pressing against your entrance. It traces the slick opening a few times before sliding in completely, causing you to cry out Din’s name in a feral voice. Then a second finger enters you, then a third, and your eyes roll back behind the blindfold as he beings to pump. Your sense of how long this is going on is completely gone, having no idea how much time is passing. All you know is the pleasure your body is feeling, totally unmeasured by time. Blindfolded and filled up with the Mandalorian’s fingers while his tongue swirls over your clit, you can feel the familiar building sensation that always comes before an orgasm. Arguably, the crescendo of nerves firing up is more pleasurable to you than an orgasm itself and this one builds for a long moment of agonizing intensity.

Legs trembling, suddenly your hands are tangled in Din’s hair as you yank harder than you mean to. “Oh, oh shit. Please don’t stop I think it’s actually happening.”  

Then the crescendo tips over, and you’re riding out the waves of orgasm with bucking hips and whining moans. Din laps at you a few more times, your body jerking with each stroke, and you beg him to let up as your sensitivity is temporarily maxed out. 

You just lay there, quivering in the aftermath, and Din crawls up to your head. When his lips touch yours again everything feels swollen and slick and wet, especially his mustache. You can taste yourself on him and it causes you to pose the question, “So how do I taste?”, once he breaks apart from you again. 

“Delectable, Cyar’ika.” 

“Thank you, Din. I am beyond grateful,” you choke, the sudden need to cry washing over you as a small sob escapes your mouth. 

“Shh,” he soothes as he scoops you into his arms. 

Grasping at him, your hands snake up into his lovely soft hair as your body comes down from the adrenaline rush of sexual release. “I really thought that would never happen, and then you manage to make me cum on the first try with zero experience. What are the odds?”

His unmodulated, gorgeous voice is whispering lowly in your ear, “I perform best when the odds are against me.” 

“Wow, such a humble Mandalorian.” Chuckling, you turn your head and catch his earlobe between your teeth. 

He makes a little noise as you nibble his ear, body shuddering. “Perhaps you were on to something when you said you’ve never had a true connection with someone. I know that this, how close I feel to you, is more tangible than any connection I’ve made since my parents died. It means quite a bit to me.”

You pull away from his ear to face him, in spite of not being able to see. “You’re not wrong. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this close to anther person, Din. I’m glad that black hole spit me out where it did.”

“Mm,” he hums, and you feel the vibration of it, “as am I.” 

You rub your cheek against his, adoring the feeling of skin and hair against your flesh as well as the scent of your sex on him. Even if you truly never get to see what this man looks like, feeling him is more than enough for you and you know it in your bones. “Thank you for trusting me. I know that the decision to remove your helmet did not come lightly.”

“Thank you for honoring your promise.”

The two of you lay there for a moment, peppering each other’s faces with kisses. You kiss his forehead, accidentally bumping into one of his eyes at first. He chuckles, and the sound of his  unmodulated laugh melts your heart. 

“Din?” 

“Yes?”

Fingers playing with his hair, you smile a little at him. If only you could see his facial expression. Then an idea strikes you, so you move to his lips again and feel what you assume is him smiling against your fingertips. “What does ‘cyare’ mean? You called me your ‘cyare’ several times. And I don’t think I’m going to pronounce this right but you also said something like ‘kah-tay-leer darasoom’? We haven’t gone over those phrases in Mando’a yet so I had no idea what you were saying. I remember you said something similar to the kid recently.”

Din doesn’t respond right away, instead he kisses you deeply while holding your blindfolded face in both hands. After a moment he pulls apart from you, and you can sense that he’s hovering an only an inch or so from your face as you feel his warm breath on your skin. The pad of his thumb traces your lips. 

“Cyare means beloved,” you feel his fingers move some of the hair from your forehead, “and what I told you was ‘ni kar’tayl gar darasuum.’ Kar’taylir means to know, to hold in the heart. Adding ‘darasuum’, eternity, changes it’s meaning to ‘I will know you forever.’ Essentially it is our phrase for expressing love. As I said before, this connection means something to me.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, the realization of his confession hitting you so hard that anther of your soft sobs echos through the cockpit. It’s not lost on you that you can feel fresh, warm wetness on his own stubbled cheeks. Tears, you’re feeling Din’s tears. He just told you that he loves you and he’s weeping. You almost can’t wrap your head around it. 

“Din,” you are so overwhelmed with emotion, feeling your own tears form as they soak into the blindfold. The part of you that is afraid to give yourself over to him, afraid of the risk involved in giving your heart to another, wants to stop you from expressing how you feel. “I…”

“You don’t have to say anything,” he whispers.

Cara’s advice echos through your mind, This life is too short not to get what you want out of it. You consider this for only but a moment, deciding that she was right and you cannot let yourself miss out on this. Yet something still feels off, and then it occurs to you, “Saying I love you just doesn’t feel right, like it means less to just say it in basic knowing there’s a beautiful way to say it in Mando’a. Say it slowly so I can hear the pronunciation.”

You feel Din hover just above your navel, placing a kiss to the flesh just below your breasts. “Ni,” his lips move between the soft peaks, “kar’tayl,” they migrate to your throat, “gar,” then he’s kissing you on the mouth again, “darasuum.”

“Ni kar’tayl gar darasuum, Din Djarin,” you whisper, lips spreading into the widest grin. 

His face nuzzles into yours some more, sighing heavily before the sound morphs into a low chuckle. “I don’t know about you but I’m exhausted.”

“I wish we could sleep together like we did on Nevarro,” you say as you nuzzle him back. The smile on your face would have to be jackhammered off at this point, your heart is just too full of glee to for it leave anytime soon. 

“Let’s try to sleep in the cot together,” he suggests, “I can’t be apart from you. Not right now.”

“Is the kid in his hammock?” 

“Yes. It’ll be a tight fit but I think we can make it work.”

“It wouldn’t be the first tight fit we’ve had to deal with tonight,” you can’t help but joke, chuckling. 

Din laughs, kissing you once more. This kiss is not deep, there are no tongues and the pacing is not feverish. His lips simply linger on yours for a long, loving moment. 

“I need to put it back on, Cyar’ika,” he eventually says as he breaks apart. 

Your chest aches a little, but you lift up to brush your nose against his once more. “Thank you for sharing this part of you with me. Will this be the only time I’ll ever get to feel you like this?” 

“No,” he breathes, tone confident, “this will not be the only time.” 

“Well until next time, then,” you say, pecking at him once more. 

You feel him move away, and then after a moment his voice is once again being filtered through the modulator of his helmet. “It’s on, you can remove the blindfold.”

The cockpit had been dimly lit to begin with but everything seems incredibly bright as you slowly peel the damp fabric from your face and the visual world comes back to you. 

Din is seated in front of you, once again wearing his helmet. You stare at him for a long moment, and suddenly none of what just happened feels real to you. 

“Holy fucking hell,” you exclaim, giddy giggles bubbling up your throat. You long to cry out in elation, like when you used to go driving alone and joyfully scream in the sanctity of your car if you were in a great mood. 

“You okay?” Din asks.

You nod, “more than okay.” 

Din watches you re-dress, the two of you looking at each other as you pull the shirt over your head and hike the stretchy pants back up your legs. He’s sorry to see your body disappear behind the fabric, but sleep is starting to sound nicer than anything else. When you’re finished, you stand next to him with a hand outstretched. Din takes it, allowing you to help him up off the floor. He scoops up the blanket and hands it over to you, checking that everything with the ship is in order before motioning for you to start heading downstairs. He quickly cleans up the mess he’d made under the pilot seat and then comes to join you. As Din descends the ladder, he sees you standing there waiting for him with the blanket draped over your shoulders and a sleepy smile on your soft features. 

“You’re a vision,” Din remarks as his feet touch the ground. 

“Mm,” you hum, smiling at him. That lovely, kind smile that first caught his attention all those months ago on Nevarro. Maker, how far things have come. He’d been so annoyed when Karga coerced him into hiring you on as the nanny, and now he can’t imagine what his life would look like if he hadn’t. 

“Let’s sleep, Cyar’ika.” Din says, tapping his forehead to yours. 

“How’s this supposed to work?” You raise an eyebrow at him, grin cheeky.

Din peers into the thin sleeping cabin, noticing that the kid is still sleeping away in his little hammock above the bed. Jupiter has somehow managed to squeeze her way onto the thing with him, and the kid is using her as a sort of pillow. Admittedly, the scene is quite endearing. 

“We lay on our sides,” Din shrugs, “you go in first and I’ll climb in after.” 

“If you say so, Chrome Dome.” Chuckling, you crawl into the cot, laying on your side up against the right wall to give him enough space to enter. 

Din kicks off his boots, bending forward to craw in with you. It’s certainly going to be a tight fit, but he thinks this may actually work nicely. He pulls himself all the way in, the door sliding shut once he’s inside. His body is already pressed to yours, so he carefully shifts around until he’s spooning up to your backside. One arm is tucked under his helmeted head, while the other is draped over you. You pull his hand into yours, tangling your fingers with his. 

“Goodnight, Din,” you whisper in the darkness.

“Jate ca,” he whispers your name, “rest well.” 

When Din awakes several hours later, his heart is so incredibly full that he’s not sure he could jam any more affection into it if he tried. You’re still out cold, but the kid has since migrated from his hammock to laying between you and the wall. One of your arms is curled around the foundling tightly, a content smile on your slightly parted lips. Jupiter has also relocated, as Din can feel her purring against the back of his helmeted head.

He should get up and start his day, but he instead closes his eyes once more and allows himself to feel happy for a long while. 

*****

Next Chapter

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Masterlist

*****

Taglist:

@luc-k-y | @theslytherinwriter | @somewereinthegalaxi | @leithatnight | @missbabyjay | @theyoutubedork

*****

[jessybarnes]

Something New

Ship - Cockles - Single!Jensen x Single!Misha

Rating - 18+ Only! Minors DNI!!

Tags - Sexuality struggles, First-time m/m sex, anal fingering, anal sex, rimming, oral (male receiving), mentions of coming out, mentions of not being accepted, anxiety, angst, fluff, smut, comfort, drinking, cursing, NSFW title banner, seriously if you're a minor go away!

Word Count - 3800 ish

Beta - Just Grammarly and Me

Fic Aesthetic - Yours truly

A/N - This is a repost from my old Tumblr account. I am in the process of transferring all of my fics over to this blog. I hope you enjoy. :)

Misha flirted a lot. Everyone knew this and accepted it as a part of his outgoing nature. Jensen, on the other hand, still hadn't grown accustomed to the lingering touches and longing stares from his best friend. It wasn't that it made him uncomfortable, no it was very much the opposite. 

He tried to ignore the way his heart sped up every time Misha's fingers grazed his skin or the way he held him when they would hug, but it was impossible. Jensen didn't want to admit it. He was supposed to be straight, find a nice woman, and give his Mother and Father the grandkids they wanted. Instead, he was having an internal battle with his mind on whether or not his male co-star was hot. 

Jensen sighed and rubbed at his temples lightly. Currently, he was reading over the newest script for one of the upcoming episodes. People probably thought that playing Dean should have come to him naturally by now since he played him on TV for the better part of thirteen years. Sometimes it was more complicated than just 'getting into character' though. 

Certain scenes, much like the one he was reading now, involved Cas and Dean staring into each other's eyes for a longer than normal period of time. That part didn't bother him as much. It was the stage direction that was written in the script. Of course, he didn't write the script or the stage directions so he didn't really have much of a say in how their characters did things. 

Jensen stared down at the off-white paper. His eyes re-reading the same bold print that menacingly stared back up at him. 

INT. THE BUNKER, DAY There's tension between Dean and Cas from a previous argument.  They eye fuck for approx. 30-45 seconds until Sam clears his throat to get their attention.

He swallowed thickly wishing the direction would change, probably for the umpteenth time now. 

Couldn't they have picked a better way to word this?

A sudden knock at his trailer door made him jump. He tossed the script onto his coffee table before walking across the room to unlock it. The familiar silhouette of Jared should have put his mind at ease, but he knew his best friend of so many years would notice something was bothering him. Deciding there was no point in avoiding the inevitable, he flung open the door to let him in. 

"Hey, Jare"

Jared walked up the two stairs into Jensen's trailer and plopped down on his sectional. 

"You're awfully quiet today, Jay. What's going on?"

Jensen sighed, running a hand across his face. Good thing he hadn't been to hair and makeup yet. He didn't wanna piss anyone off this early in the day. Grabbing two beers, he tossed one to Jared and sat down. 

"I don't really wanna talk about it. Not like there's anything anyone can do about it anyway."

He took a long pull of his beer while Jared studied him. He watched Jensen's eyes glance at the stapled packet of papers quickly before focusing on the view from the window. 

"It's something from today's shoot isn't it, Jay?"

Jared picked up the papers and leaned back against the couch. Jensen didn't try and stop him, but he didn't elaborate either. He just sat and watched as the taller Texan read over the page he'd been mulling over a few minutes ago. 

"I don't see anything wrong wi-"

Jared stopped mid-sentence and turned to look at Jensen. He scooted slightly closer and pointed to the middle of the page. 

"It's the 'eye fucking' part isn't it?"

Jensen looked away, picking at a loose string in the hem of his jeans. The beer bottle rested loosely against his lips as he took another swig.

"Jensen, you should really tell him, you know."

It was a miracle the beer didn't come out his nose. It took him a minute to stop choking and gain his breath back. A blush crept up the side of his neck as he looked down at his lap. 

"I don't know what you're talking about, Jared."

Once again the script was tossed carelessly on the coffee table. Jared scoffed and rolled his eyes. 

"Oh c'mon, Jay! You can't possibly think I believe you. I know how you feel about Mish, and I think you do, too. It's okay to admit that you got a thing for him, and frankly, I think you should talk to him about it. I mean look at it this way, how many times have we told fans that it's okay to be yourself. Love is love, and honestly, I think Misha feels the same way."

Jensen let out a defeated sigh. He should have known better. He and Jared can read each other like a book, and sometimes that wasn't necessarily a good thing. 

"I can't tell him, Jared. I'm not supposed to feel things like this for another man. My parents didn't bring me up this way. I'm just going to grin and bear it until we get through shooting this. I'm an actor. I can just push my feelings aside until this is all over with." 

Jared set his bottle down and repositioned himself so he was facing him. Jensen looked miserable. He was clearly stressing way too much over this. He was pale and dark circles lingered under his eyes from lack of sleep.

"Jay, that's bullshit and you know it! You can't control the way you feel for someone. It doesn't matter how your parents wanted you to turn out. What does matter is who you want to be. If the real you is attracted to both men and women, then so be it. If your Mom and Dad can't accept you for who you are, then they aren't taking your best interest to heart."

Jensen rested his head in his hands and shook his head. 

"Even if they miraculously accept the fact that I have a crush on Mish, how the hell am I going to tell him? I have no idea how I'll get the words out, let alone bring it up."

Jared stood up and walked toward the liquor cabinet. He pulled a bottle of Crown Royal from the top shelf and blew the dust off. 

“Sounds like you could use some stronger liquid courage.”

Now it was Jensen’s turn to scoff. He watched as Jared grabbed two glasses from one of the cabinets and put a couple cubes of ice in them. 

“I can’t shoot these scenes drunk off my ass Jared. Bob will have my head.”

If Jared heard him, he didn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he focused on pouring them each a glass. Handing one to Jensen, he sat back down and sipped at it slowly. After a minute of looking between his glass and his best friend, he sighed and licked his lips. 

“Ah, what the hell, why not? Gotta get through today’s shooting somehow.”

Forty-five minutes later everyone was on the Bunker set setting up for the next scene. The crew was getting the lighting perfected while the director, who just happened to be none other than Richard Speight Jr., conversed with Misha across the room. Jensen shifted his weight nervously and tried to look anywhere else. His eyes kept finding their way back to him though. 

Even though their characters wore layers upon layers of clothing, Jensen could still tell Misha had been working out. His thighs were well defined in the black slacks, how the tan fabric of Castiel’s trench coat hugged his biceps made his mouth water and the way his hair was tousled sent image after naughty image through his mind. 

Jensen bit his lip and looked away. There was no way he was surviving this scene. Misha had him hook, line, and sinker, and the way things were looking he was going to end up walking off the set before they had a usable take. Before he was able to dwell on it any longer, fingers snapped in his face bringing him back to reality. 

“Hellooo! Jensen? You okay man? We’re ready to start, but if you need a minute we-”

Jensen pushed past Rich and stood on his mark that was taped to the floor. 

“I’m good. Let’s get this over with.”

Misha studied him, his piercing cerulean eyes making him shiver. Jared walked around the table and sat in front of the open laptop. Things were eerily quiet between the three of them. Normally, they would be joking around until the moment action was called. 

Rich took a seat in the director's chair and looked through the camera one more time making sure the angle of the shot was right before turning his attention back to them. 

“Roll sound!”

One of the crew members came in with a slate board and held it in front of the camera. 

“Supernatural scene thirty-two, take one! Marker!”

Rich took a deep breath and crossed one leg over the other. He knew this was an intense scene so he was mentally preparing himself to do more than one take. 

“Action!”

Misha walked around the table holding a tattered old book. Jensen eyed him furiously as he snatched it out of his hand. 

“Dammit Cas! I know we needed this book, but I told you not to do anything stupid!”

Misha tilted his head sideways, narrowing his eyes. The hand that was holding the book now rested rigidly at his side, his fingers curled into a fist. 

“Dean, this was probably our only chance for us to get this book! I took a chance and brought it back unharmed. I did it for you! You want to save your brother don’t you?”

Jensen slammed the book on the table a little too hard causing Jared to jump. It wasn’t in the script, but no one said anything so he continued with his line. 

“You could have waited for Sammy and me! We could have gone and got it together. Cas, you could have gotten yourself killed man! When are you gonna learn that you’re our family Cas? Family sticks together. Sammy needs you ... I need you. 

Misha stepped slightly closer to Jensen and lifted those ocean eyes up to his green ones. Jensen was shaking. Whether it was with rage or nervousness he didn’t know, but he had to finish this scene. He couldn’t do this more than once. His eyes flitted down to Misha’s mouth just as his tongue came out to wet his lips, and dammit if he didn’t feel his cock twitch. He couldn’t do this. He needed to get out of there. Just as he was about to storm off to the confines of his trailer, Jared cleared his throat. 

“Guys … get this! So, the writings in this book are apparently a dead language! There’s some sort of codex that requires piecing together, but I think I can crack it if I can just get past this encrypted file.”

“Cut!”

Rich stood up and rubbed his hands together. 

“That was great guys! Very well done with the dynamics. Oh! Nice touch with making Jared jump Jay. His face was priceless! I’m recommending that one for the gag reel.”

Jensen wasn’t listening. He was still staring at Misha, who was now taking off Cas’ tan coat. He watched as his back muscles flexed under his white button-up, and immediately felt his mouth go dry. He couldn’t stand in the same space as his co-star any longer. It was too much. Everyone watched as he took off towards his trailer. Anything was better than feeling this way in his opinion.

“Jensen? You sure you’re feeling okay? You look a little flushed. Hey! Jens- Where are you going? We gotta do another take. Jensen?!”

Once he was back behind his trailer door he immediately stripped off all his clothes and tossed them in a pile. Nothing sounded more appealing than a cold shower. He relished the feeling of the cool spray as it cascaded down his body. Jensen propped his arm against the shower wall and rested his head against it. He needed to figure out how to suppress his feelings because he didn’t think he could go through this every day. 

Ten minutes later he cut the water off and shoved the shower curtain back. Jensen shivered as water droplets clung to his skin. He wrapped one of his burgundy towels around his waist and padded back into his kitchen to grab another beer. 

“Hey Jens.”

He didn’t expect to hear another voice coming from his living room area, and he definitely didn’t expect it to be Misha’s. He nearly jumped out of his skin as he whirled around. 

“Jesus, Mish! What the hell?!”

Misha stood and walked across the room not stopping until he was mere inches from him. Jensen swallowed thickly looking down at the neck of the beer bottle to try and distract himself. 

“Why are you avoiding me, Jay? Jared says you’re not, but I can tell you are. You’ve barely said two words to me today other than when we filmed that scene. Even then, I could tell something was wrong. You rarely break character.”

Jensen shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Mish I … It’s not that simple. Y-You didn’t do anything wrong … I just … I can’t do this.”

Misha grabbed his arm before he could get away and pressed him against the wall. The way Jensen’s breath hitched didn’t go unnoticed by him, and that only confirmed his suspicions. 

“Can’t do what Jay?”

Jensen inhaled sharply, the smell of Misha’s cologne nearly making him moan.

“Wha - What are you doing?!”

Misha rested a hand on Jensen’s chest. The water droplets still lingered and he could feel the rapid beat of his heart against his palm. 

“Shh. Just relax Jay. Just let go.”

Jensen closed his eyes, shuddering under the warmth of his fingertips. 

“I - I don’t know what you’re ta-”

Before he could finish his sentence Misha’s lips were on his. For a split second, all Jensen could do was stand there. Eventually, he threw caution to the wind and began to kiss him back. His lips were pillow-soft and he tasted of spearmint. It was intoxicating, and it only made Jensen more dizzy with want. 

Misha tilted his head and licked at Jensen’s bottom lip requesting permission. He granted him access without hesitation groaning as he licked into his mouth. Misha’s knee pressed between his thigh forcing the towel around his waist to come loose. The friction against his dick along with Misha’s perfect lips kissing and licking along his pulse point became his undoing. Jensen wasted no more time contemplating whether he was making a big mistake or not. The hottest man he’d ever laid eyes on was bringing him pleasure he’d never felt before, and he intended on returning it tenfold. 

“Unngh M-Mish… fuck…”

A low growl came from Jensen’s throat as he maneuvered them toward the hallway. His towel lay forgotten on the floor, his hands finding refuge in Misha’s short dark locks. He tore at the slightly shorter man’s shirt trying desperately to remove it. Buttons littered the small space scattering in different directions when it wouldn’t come off fast enough. Misha chuckled and brought Jensen’s head down for another bruising kiss. 

“Wardrobe is gonna be pissed you know. That was one of Castiel’s only clean white shirts.”

Jensen worked at his belt and wasted no time in shoving Misha’s slacks down his legs. His mouth watered at the sight of his tented boxers, a noticeable wet spot becoming more prominent from his arousal. 

“Don’t care. Wardrobe can take it outta my pay. Need you too bad.”

Misha knew how reserved Jensen was, and the fact that he was unable to speak in full sentences and was on the verge of losing control was by far the sexiest thing he’d ever seen. Slowly Misha sank to his knees and looked up at Jensen through his long lashes. He wetted his lips placing open-mouthed kisses on his thighs. Jensen whimpered shamelessly when Misha licked a long stripe up the underside of his cock. Before he could process what was happening, Misha took him deep into his mouth and didn’t stop until he hit the back of his throat. 

“F-Fuck! Christ, Misha... “ 

Misha couldn’t get enough of how Jensen tasted. It reminded him of sandalwood and old spice. He stripped off his boxers and began palming his cock, moaning at the way Jensen was coming undone by his mouth alone. 

“Fuck Jay, you taste so good. Wanna feel you cum baby. Wanna taste every last drop of that sweet nectar.”

Jensen was so close he could taste it. The heat coiled in his lower belly, and his hands instinctively came out to grasp the back of Misha’s head. His rhythmic thrusts soon became more erratic as the first waves of his orgasm washed over him. 

“Oh fuck! Mish I’m gonna… fuck I-I’m gon- ah!!!”

Jensen watched as Misha swallowed around him making sure not to miss a single drop. He stood, pressing his lean body against his, leaving a trail of kisses along his jaw. 

“Such a good boy Jay. You taste so good too.”

Jensen’s breathing was ragged as he came down from his high. His eyes were closed and his cock was still rock hard. He was a goddamn goner. Never in his life had he come that hard, not until Misha anyway. 

Mere minutes later, Jensen was sprawled out on his bed. Misha was rooting around in his drawers for something, and soon he realized what it was. His eyes went wide at the small bottle of lube and the predatory look in his co-star’s eyes. 

“Mish, I… I’ve never…”

Misha silenced him with a sweet kiss on his lips. 

“I know baby, don’t worry okay? I’m gonna make sure you’re nice and prepared for me. Gonna make you feel so good, Jay. Can’t wait to hear those pretty moans you'll make just for me.”

The sound of the bottle cap opening filled the room and soon Misha was coating his fingers with the shiny liquid. He leaned his body over Jensen’s, resting his weight on one arm. The other slid between his bow legs finding his entrance with ease. Jensen sucked in a breath as Misha pressed one digit against his opening. 

“Shh, baby you gotta relax for me. Just breathe, Jay. Let me in and I’ll show you how good it feels.”

Jensen opened his eyes and was met with Misha’s lust-blown ones. He let out a shaky breath, and let his mouth fall open as Misha eased in his finger. He eased it in and out slowly creating a steady rhythm. It wasn’t painful, but it was definitely foreign. Soon Misha slid in another finger and curled them upwards searching out his prostate. He knew he’d found it when Jensen’s back arched off the bed and the prettiest moan he’d ever heard fell from his lips. 

“Mmmm, Jay… I wanna taste you. Get on all fours baby. Gonna show you how good it feels to be worshiped.”

Jensen flipped over on his belly and gripped his pillow. Misha hooked his fingertips into the place where his thighs met his hips and pulled him so his ass was presented to him nicely. 

“So beautiful... “

Misha placed a hand on each side of his ass and spread him open. Jensen dipped his head low and groaned when he felt the wetness of Misha’s tongue against his hole lapping at him repeatedly. He could feel the familiar heat in his core and began fisting his cock furiously. 

“Oh God… Mish! Please… p-please need to feel you…”

Misha pulled away, his chin glistening with saliva. He turned Jensen over so he was laying on his back again. He pushed two fingers back inside him and began to scissor him open gently. His mouth leaving love bites along Jensen’s inner thighs. 

“Gotta get you ready for me baby. Don’t wanna hurt you any more than necessary.”

Soon Misha was three fingers deep and Jensen was wantonly meeting every thrust. He could almost cum like this. Watching his best friend coming undone by his hands alone. It was almost too much. 

“Please f-fuck me… please! Need you. Fuck Misha please!”

Misha removed his fingers and slicked his cock up with lube. He once again leaned over Jensen and captured their lips in a heated kiss. He knew this would hurt, so he did his best to distract him from the pain. Pressing firmly against his tight hole, he sheathed himself inside him. Both of them moaned obscenely at the sensation, and Misha tried not to cum at the way Jensen’s muscles squeezed him deliciously. After a few seconds, he felt the Texan’s nails scrape bluntly against his chest. 

“Fuck me Mish… Wanna feel everything you’ve got.”

Misha growled and pulled out almost completely, before slamming back into him. Jensen threw his head back and gripped the sheets, not caring that his sinful moans filled his trailer. They built up a steady pace, and both were well aware that people walking by could tell what was going on. Soon Misha’s brutal thrusts became more sporadic. His forehead rested against Jensen’s as his cock pounded him, brushing against his prostate over and over again. 

“Fuck Mish, You’re gonna make me cum again… c’mon baby, fill me up. Wanna feel you cum inside me. Fuck baby, just like that...Oh, God!”

Misha swallowed his moans with a heated kiss. Jensen could feel his second orgasm of the day approaching as Misha continued to fuck into him. He began to stroke his cock feverishly, his ass tight around Misha’s dick as the first spurts of white coated his belly. 

“F-FUCK MISHA!!” 

Misha wasn’t far behind, filling him up, as he felt Jensen’s cum coat their chests. They stayed like that, breath heavy, and beads of sweat covering their bodies. Slowly Misha pulled out and grabbed the nearest article of clothing to clean them up. 

He climbed back on the bed and laid next to Jensen nuzzling into his neck. He felt the warmth of his arms snake around his torso and held him close. 

“Fuck, that was amazing..” Jensen purred. 

Misha peppered kisses along his pulse point and raked his nails lightly down his back. 

“You did so well for your first time, Jay. I’m so proud of you. Took me so well.” Misha said tiredly.

Jensen felt his breathing even out, and soon light snores fell from his lips. It was hard to believe how fast he was falling for this man, but he couldn’t wait to see where they’d take their newfound relationship. Whatever happened, he knew he would be along for the ride

[kkotda]

KOI . I SAW THE SELFSHIP ASK GAME AND I AM HERE >:33333 aaaa i was gonna ask for koizume with flower shop/tattoo artist but you already beat me to it….. it’s a very fitting au for u two hehe

i also wanted to ask!!!! abt a koijo cosmic deity au 👀👀👀 and marikoi arranged marriage au……..

ARI I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU (double k.o. with these i love it) koizume with flower shop/tattoo artist...... aldkfjasldkjfs AND YOU THINK IT'S FITTING I HAVE ASCENDED THAT LITERALLY HAS ME SMILING SO HARD RN OMG

#koijo -> cosmic deity au: who’s the personification of the sun? who’s the personification of the moon? give one headcanon about you and your f/o’s relationship in this AU!

oh. OH. you so asked this with sun worshipper togame on purpose didn't you. DIDN'T YOU. (/lh) head in hands im morally obligated to say that im the personification of the sun and he’s the personification of the moon because he finds meaning and reason for being with my existence (…“suguru.” “satoru.”). like without me he literally cannot exist. SIGH (also wanted to incorporate this post but realized how chogame it was and literally had to sit down for a bit ;-;)

the thought of the moon forever chasing the sun and the sun forever chasing the moon, unable to stop in fear of getting further from the other but always an equal distance apart has me with my head in my hands feeling absolutely gutted

-> mutual pining, angst, more angst, like tons of angst, star-crossed lovers, right person wrong au (lol)

there. done.

kidding :3

the thought i can’t get out of my head:

-> we’re dancing beneath the moonlight, in his domain (domain expansion: everlasting as the moon). he’s in midnight blue, holding me gently. one hand used to lead us around, the other placed tenderly on the small of my back. he then transports us to the beach, and we sit on the sand, admiring the ocean and the waves crashing gently into the sand. we steal kisses and the moon is full, shining so brightly, reflecting off of the ocean’s surface so beautifully it glitters. we fall back onto soft grass (another transportation) and we point at stars, smiling and laughing. he draws lines between stars, connecting them, and creates constellations, a gallery of shared memories of you will, hanging them up like polaroids on walls. and then he disappears, fading away into a pale sky, as i wake from my slumber and start another day, cold and lifeless and lonely

*combined 3 fandoms in 1 cursed phrase :,)

**‘cursed’… sigh

#marikoi -> arranged marriage au: who’s the one being shipped off to an unfamiliar kingdom? who’s the heir that has to welcome their betrothed? give one headcanon about you and your f/o’s relationship in this AU!

HEAD IN HANDS WITH THIS ONE TOO WTFFF ANBDJSNSNSNNS. okay okay for this one i’m the one being shipped off to an unfamiliar kingdom and he’s the heir who is to welcome me when i arrive:

-> he helps me get off the ship like any other gentleman would, greeting me stiffly. he remains distant afterwards too, curt bows to replace ‘hello’s and ‘how are you?’s. he doesn’t know me, he wants to reject me, he’s a romantic at heart after all. but after so many dinners together, so many walks and chance encounters (they really are chance!!!) in the garden, he hates me a little less. comes to tolerate me, and then craves my company, looks for me in his daily tasks (slow burn, 50k words, the whole shebang)

okay so uh cliche sick scene:

-> i fall ill in the winter, happens to the best of us i guess :,) and this is still when he bristles if i’m present but he’s immediately aware that i’m not where i would be. normally, when he enters the library, i would be in sight a little bit to the left, reading by the window. he knows this because he sees me reading there when the sunlight hits my hair in a way that seems to create this halo around my head. and that very image plagues his mind, consuming his every thought, until he has no choice but to paint it out. for a long time before we get closer, the painting sits in his bedchamber, on a sizable canvas, so he sees it when he retires for the night and rises for the day. (he’s a little miffed that it’s his best piece yet :p lol but he hangs it up, showing it off when we become closer and ofc i tease him for hiding it away for so long) so he waves for his attendant, telling him to inquire about my whereabouts. just simple curiosity, nothing more (totally). the attendant returns, whispering in his ear that i haven’t left my chambers since we separated after dinner. he’s like what so he summons one of my attendants who i’ve brought from home but she’s panicked because my fever is high and i haven’t broken it yet. he’s like huh? his heart rate is picking up as he strides to my wing of the palace, my attendant close behind. and when he bursts through the door, he sees me still in bed, clearly not okay, and he’s like how did this happen. the royal doctor is there like, this is her first winter here, her body is not used to it (…i just had a thought. i’m mixing in seasons au. as in i’m spring/summer coded and he’s winter coded. oh god.) blah blah blah and he’s like isn’t there anything you can do and the doctor shakes his head like she needs to break her fever (gee, thanks sir. don’t need to go to med school for that one) but he feels so conflicted. when the initial shock wears off. because (cliche alert!!!) where did these feelings come from? why is he so bothered that i’m sick and flushed in the face, needing cool towels on my forehead, and i’m panting and suffering? how the plot thickens :3 the worst of it passes, and i’ve broken the fever, but i’m still not well enough to get out of bed. but he still dismisses everyone, and he sits at my bedside, checking my forehead every so often to see if the fever has come back. and in this scenario i’m imagining him as running on the colder side (winter coded) but i think it’s the warmest thing. i regain my senses really late into the night and i see him fallen asleep in the chair, neck in a really awkward position. but he wakes when i try to get up, telling me not to be stupid and that i need to rest. (modifying the one bed trope:) but i just scoot a little to the side, asking that he joins me and gets in a more comfortable position to sleep. he goes red in the face ofc but he doesn’t want to leave me alone so he complies (after much insisting on my part too). and we talk a little, finally getting to know each other and yeah, the end :3

-> bonus scene: it’s the hottest gossip now, the spring sun has melted off the ice of their prince’s heart ;)

^if anyone thinks this is ooc, no it’s not <3 (i’m saying this to myself because i’m so used to marius being so devoted and smitten to rosa but i’m no rosa ;-;)

selfship au ask game!

[wellfell]

WANTED CONNECTIONS ; hehe . call it a wishlist if you will , just the dynamics i want to write with akina . and it means you can always message me to plot one of them , i'm always open . 💕

ships ;

ryuji & akina ; ding dong . 🤞 listen just the dynamic of feral girl and geek bf but the geek bf is the meanest man in the world . and truth is akina is attracted to him because he's mean , but she doesn't know it . also there's always ghosts and death around their relationship . but keep in mind that akina meets him as her professor when she's around the age of twenty4 , twenty5 even older so yeah there's no funny business in that .

akina & eren ; uhm . yeah . angry and angrier . as i said , since it happens around the era that she's eighteen / nineteen it wouldn't be anything too dramatic but very dramatic because akina is an idiot with a really nice heart and despite seeing his point she could never join his side . enemies , and also openly avoiding hurting each other completely . and always bickering , and instinctively saving each other ... poetic .

lan & akina ; lan is the bestest man in the world and akina is the worst human being . yeah , that dynamic . and the whole soulmate shit which is more of a curse to him than anything because yeah akina will die before she's thirty or something with the amount of channelling energy she holds in herself . now add the fact that akina would and will demolish everything and everyone around herself , bring a grand destruction upon anyone that lays a finger on him . ✍️

moiraine & akina ; good god . just imagine it . them knowing each other before akina was cast out and they were pretty close . akina is fire and she's water akina is red and she's blue . moiraine knowing that liandrin and everyone else in the tower is using akina , because the more she uses her power the more she gets closer to death and burning out . so .

other ;

fumiko ; HER BESTIE ??? fumiko is a quiet girl , and it was the ' she saved me from the bullies ' tropes because akina didn't hesitate when she saw one of the cheerleaders make fun of the way fumiko dresses . then went to rudely tell her she won't help her the next time it happens and guess what ; she's fucking lying .

a mother figure ; HAHAHAHAH . god . it's not even hard , just be a considerably older woman and ask if she's eaten and she'll literally keep coming back to your house every day with a tiny gift or a cake she's baked for you . kinda pathetic . she'll help you with everything but she'll overdo it lol and it'll probably damage the woman's life . uwu .

osamu's assistant ; they might be the only one who really respects akina and they probably still call her ' little miss ' like she's a little girl . and it'd be nice . she'd shut them out whenever they tried to talk about her dad though , but yeah . i haven't decided how and who they could be so it'd be all up to you fr .