#WHITE PEOPLE TRY BLACK MEN ON JURIES ALL THE FUCKING TIME WITH NOT A CARE IN THE WORLD!!!!

[gogoakechi]

i will not become emotionally invested in how my classmates interpret an example of a short story in my creative writing class and i will not think poorly of them for having opinions i disagree with

[barnesandco]

I posted 1,167 times in 2021

411 posts created (35%)

756 posts reblogged (65%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 1.8 posts.

I added 490 tags in 2021

#tfatws - 96 posts

#tfatws spoilers - 62 posts

#ayesha answers - 56 posts

#bucky barnes - 50 posts

#the falcon and the winter soldier - 46 posts

#timezone reblog - 45 posts

#bucky barnes x reader - 42 posts

#sam wilson - 36 posts

#ted lasso - 32 posts

#the falcon and the winter solider - 25 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i'm honestly not going to talk about or acknowledge any white marvel men any more besides tom holland bc he hasn't pushed my last button yet

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Very Unfriendly Reminder that Tommy Lee:

would regularly moon audiences during concerts,

was sued for assaulting a Jewish cameraman,

attempted to have a Nazi tattoo on his arm removed from evidence in said lawsuit to avoid the jury developing any prejudice against Lee,

was arrested alongside bandmate Nikki Six for using racial slurs against a black security guard, pouring liquor on him, and encouraging the crowd at their concert to attack the guard,

allegedly transmitted hepatitis C to Pamela Anderson during a tattoo session,

admitted to kicking Anderson while she was holding their infant son, Dylan,

attacked Anderson so she was left with bruises, a torn fingernail, and terrified for the safety of her two sons,

has said, of the necessary procedures that took place during his battle for equal custody of his sons: “Doesn't it sound reasonable? [...] We're going through all this crazy bullshit of psychiatric evaluation [...] It's such an ugly, shitty situation, man, and it's a big fucking waste of money. At some point both lawyers end up putting another new wing on their homes, and nobody benefits. Certainly the children don't: they're being interviewed by therapists. I mean, for God's sake, they're five and six years old. I just hope it's over soon and I just hope I get to spend as much time with my kids as they do with their mum. That's all I really want; I don't care about anything else.”

In conclusion, he has done some truly, truly horrendous things, and if I see anyone romanticize him as an individual for whatever fictionalized version Hulu has created that Sebastian Stan will be portraying, I will lose my shit I swear to God. Please Don’t. Biopics are not biographies.

2215 notes • Posted 2021-05-08 16:31:32 GMT

#4

As much as I want to celebrate and cheer the Dora Milaje for kicking some stupid asses, the main takeaway from this episode that is unavoidably somber is seeing the shield covered in the blood of someone who was trying to fight for a unified world, who begged for mercy, and who was not responsible for the crime he was murdered for. I want to point out that this visual representation of the shield being misused is only the most explicit depiction of the conflicting nature of that symbol that most people of color have been dealing with for as long as that shield has existed.

Sam refused the shield for many reasons but Mackie has been arguing that part of it is bc it is unimaginably difficult for a black man to represent a nation that has not stood for the black man.

Sarah says, very clearly, that she cannot care about the mascot of a country that doesn't care about her world.

The shield, in many ways, represents America, and America has, historically, systematically and violently oppressed people of color, which makes it very hard for those people of color to claim that symbol, because to them, it is the visual representation of their oppression, and the systems that inhibit their lives.

To people of color, that shield has always had some blood on it, because America as an institution has actively harmed people of color.

And this goes beyond America and the American people, as you can see by the fact that this extra-judicial killing of a member of the Flag Smashers occurs outside of the United States. As someone from a country where uncountable numbers of people have been killed as collateral damage of US-drone strikes, amongst other things, that shield also represents the imperialist military complex that America has and enforces on the world. The shield represents America and America has spilled a lot of blood on foreign soil, a significant amount of it more innocent than the Flag Smasher Walker killed.

TL;DR: Episode 4 may be the first time we are seeing blood physically on the shield for the first time, but for American people of color, and those belonging to nations harmed by American imperialism, that shield has had blood on it for a long time, because it represents America, and for aforementioned groups, America has fronted suffering.

2349 notes • Posted 2021-04-09 10:31:00 GMT

#3

As a black man in America, the idea of representing a country that has never stood for you, taken up for you, encouraged you, built you up, afforded you opportunity, or acknowledged what you've done since you've been here, makes it very difficult to put those stars and stripes on your chest and say you're representing that country.

So, Sam is in a position where, you know, how does he live with the idea of what his parents, his grandparents, his great-grandparents, his ancestors went through and that not be changed, acknowledged, or in any shape, way or form [there be thought given to that] by the country that he's supposed to protect and represent.

-Anthony Mackie on Sam Wilson taking on the mantle of Captain America (photographed by Chip Carey for Entertainment Weekly)

2484 notes • Posted 2021-03-28 16:01:35 GMT

#2

me: *hates zemo*

zemo: *dresses like it's fashion week, basically sugar-daddy's sam and bucky, and is almost aggressively non-racist*

me: 👀👀👀👀

3890 notes • Posted 2021-04-02 09:23:41 GMT

#1

Kabul has fallen, Afghanistan is almost completely under Taliban rule now, and President Ashraf Ghani has fled. I wasn't alive during the Vietnam war, but having seen the images of Saigon at the end of it, it's impossible not to think of them when seeing the footage of Chinooks airlifting US embassy workers to Kabul airport. l cannot tell you how surreal it is to be watching the news from neighboring Pakistan, sitting next to my grandfather who has been alive for every change of government since the Brits left after the war.

History repeats and repeats and repeats, nobody learns a damn thing, and innocent civilians are the ones that suffer.

250 000 Afghans have left their homes. Many more are going to do so. And that's just the ones who flee. Those who don't will live under a conservative rule that is going to commit crimes against humanity on a daily basis, that is going to ruin the lives of generations to come.

The worst part is, I don't know what else there is to be done at this point. I can only pray that my country will accommodate the incoming refugees, though I fear they won't.

All I ask is that international community keep Afghanistan in their thoughts, and that everyone raises their voice against what is happening, both in terms of what the Taliban is doing, and how the actions of foreign powers led us to this point. The US, the UK, Pakistan, are all at fault, and must be held accountable

24006 notes • Posted 2021-08-15 16:14:15 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[roseate7]

Pens fans and Sid fans are great at holding our faves accountable - you’re probably not

If you’re inflamed by that title then this post is for you. Flouncing away from it makes you look like a clown who can’t handle criticism and correction. I’ll go ahead and preface this by saying my disability limits my usage of screens to only the absolute essentials so I won’t be back here to see if you’ve done either so please save yourself time and any huffy replies you’re bristling with. I’m not interested in returning to tumblr, trust me.

I shouldn’t be surprised considering this fandom’s selectiveness when it comes to politics and hockey but it’s still not great to get an anon message that huge swathes of fandom are now treating the topic of racism not with regards to Akim Aliu or BLM, but as a popularity contest of performative white men. Oh and their eagerness to once again remind anyone they think cares that “humph they don’t wike Sidney Cwosby and their fave is superior! Take THAT Cwosby fans!”

Again, y’all should’ve saved yourselves the trouble but fortunately I and Pens fandom have a nice history of protesting and holding our team and Sid accountable for you to learn from. Especially Caps and Blues fans recently, also anyone gross enough to be Ovechkin fans, but especially if you consciously decide to have anything to do with supporting the Blackhawks and not smacking yourself in the eye every time you type or utter the team name. Like, holy shit are we really out here on the brink of saying you can be best friends with Patrick Kane and still be... jesus christ. (Start here and work backward - any other Pens fans, rb and add your own history of it) I’ll try to keep this brief but I couldn’t really care less if anyone finds it too long lol. If you’re all willing to post about this shit then you can sit and listen.

1) If any of the gestures made by these white men has turned your head or made you think they’re better than other white men in hockey then a) you’re obviously biased towards them in the first place and are jumping on any fucking crumb cast your way, and b) you’re wrong. They do not care about you. They do not care about BLM. They have known all along when they and others have done wrong and they have done nothing until pressured to do so. They do not care about anything beyond hockey. 

2) I have watched multiple rotations of PR efforts to Make Hockey Players Seem Like Great Guys over the decades. This is the latest. They pretend to atonement. They donate. They make statements. They wear tape on their sticks. They put on special jerseys for fifteen minutes. They pose with the minority they have offended (or attend Pride parades and get nothing but praise for it and the unearned mantle of having saved gays everywhere). And yet as I am here to attest, it has never done anything. It is intended to make you like them and do exactly what you’re doing now - buy into their cultivated hierarchy of goodness that has zero relevance to real world ideas of goodness or morality. 

3) The bar is too low to call any white male hockey player a good man. “But you stan Crosby!!” Yep. Read through my blog and I absolutely go nuts with the narrative of this guy’s career and his impact or lack of action in hockey. I balance a fascination with him as a hockey player with real life criticism of him as a person. You can too! 

4) Lastly, if you think “omg my guy is SOOOOO much better than Crosby because of x, y, and z” then you are a fool. You’re playing precisely into what the NHL and it’s teams have been pushing - especially on female fans! You’ve been fed a version of a white man, you’ve been given a tamping down in terms of your expectations, and now you’re in love. You’ll take anything he throws you and carry it like a banner over the heads of any inferior hockey men! You’re the loser in this exchange.

Ironically for the latest batch of “I hate Crosby”, Sidney Crosby has in fact done far more to improve the diversity of hockey than your white faves - the Little Penguins was his baby and spread league wide as the Learn to Play program and his focus has been to push management of his teams toward making tickets and events accessible to lower income families. Most of your dudes wait for initiatives from Head Office to be handed down via PR. Here’s the kicker! that absolutely every Pens and Sid fan I know is aware of! Neither Sid’s proactive work nor most players’ going along makes them better than each other in a real world sense! Because none of them are doing a fraction of what they could easily be doing to tackle real issues in an up front and direct way! And they all know it and hide from it! They’re all white boys who don’t like to rock the boat unless enough of their brothers do it with them!

None of them spoke up for Akim Aliu in any actual supportive way!! They waited for human trash bag Evander Kane to say something and slowly trickled in!! they all waited!! They waited their whole careers and they’re gonna keep you waiting!! 

Jonathan Toews is not better than Sidney Crosby. You are the ones who are upset by that fact - we’re the ones who’ve never questioned it. Johnny being best friends with a racist and abuser (and defending him openly!) and never answering for his racist logo on his chest or his notoriously brazen racist fans DOES NOT GO AWAY just because in this instance Sidney Crosby was later than him. It does not disappear just because his fans read a silly and utterly empty, self-serving mansplaining text post and decide that he is suddenly better than Sidney Crosby’s equally empty statement days later. Judge these men intelligently!! Stop making it a teen magazine bestest boy rating!! DO NOT TELL PEOPLE TO BRUSH OFF A MAN’S FRIENDSHIP AND DEFENCE OF A RACIST ABUSER RAPIST JUST BECAUSE HE WROTE A NOTE SAYING HE’S FOUND OUT ABOUT RACISM AND BOY IT’S NOT GOOD EH.

Please, just for a second, just think of how stupid it is to take an issue like systemic racism and actually sit down and actually turn it into whose boy is better than whose. For the love of god please if nothing else stop doing that!!

THE TIME FOR STATEMENTS TO ACT AS BROWNIE POINTS IS DONE. THE TIME FOR WHITE MEN COPPING TO RACISM IN THEIR LEAGUE AND THE WORLD AS SOMETHING WORTHY OF PRAISE IS DONE. THEY ARE TOO LATE. STOP ACCEPTING SO LITTLE JUST SO YOU CAN ENGAGE IN STAN WARS. 

THE PEOPLE DOING THE WORK TO IMPROVE SYSTEMIC RACISM IS ALL YOU SHOULD CONCERN YOURSELF WITH. NOT THEIR SEEMINGLY BENEVOLENT OPPRESSORS. STOP TALKING ABOUT THEM. STOP PRAISING THEM. IF THEY REALLY MEAN WHAT THEY ARE SAYING THEY WILL CONTINUE WITHOUT PRAISE AND WE WILL SEE IT IN REALITY OVER YEARS TO COME. THEY GET NOTHING FROM US NOW. NOTHING.

NO ONE CARES THAT YOU DO NOT LIKE SIDNEY CROSBY. WE CARE THAT YOU ARE INSISTING THAT WE REDUCE OUR SOCIAL AWARENESS DOWN TO SLURPING ON ANY WHITE MAN’S EGO IN THE MIDST OF INEQUALITY AND ABUSE THAT HE - WHOEVER HE IS - HAS SILENTLY AND ACTIVELY PERPETUATED, JUST BECAUSE HE DONATED MONEY OR WROTE STUPID FUCKING WORDS IN NOTES APP. 

[peanutbutterisland-blog]

Black Mafia - short story

Black Mafia- also in archives 

This is a fictional story written by Owami Jackson. Leave all assumptions and expectations at the door, welcome to a world inhabited by a few and run by many.

Chapter 1- Welcome to the Mafia

It is said that a city is the representation of its people, the rougher the edges the more connected the people and non could be  truer than the city of Fermount USA. It was a large industrial city, built on the backs of black Americans who had settled on the land after the emancipation act was introduced. The businesses were family owned and the community was forged together by hard labor and a deep engraved mantra for ‘fuck the man’ but this city was not backwards thinking at all,  it was 1970 and the world was changing and so was the city of Fermount. Throughout 1970 to 1975 the city came alive, with buildings being erected everyday, and in time the city lit up with new opportunities, clubs, hotels, stadiums and restaurants grew over night like wild mushrooms and one family struck while the iron was hot.

With every building that was erected in Fermount the Washington family had their hands in its creation. A prominent black family that had its soul engraved in Fermount, the family was so big that they inhabited both the East and West of the city and within the inner city is where they flourished. They owned every club and large property within the inner city or at-least had their hands in it. They grew there money from organized crime in the early 60s and invested it in the city of Fermount, they had close affiliations to the Mayor and governor of Fermount and where respected and feared within the city. With such a large family there had to be a large patriarch and his name was Luis Washington or better known as Father. He was the head of the family and all operations of the family business. He was a large man who had a lot of love and was fierce when he needed too Be. With everything that he had built he was most proud of his family, his eldest son, Rahim Washington was the next in line for the family business and he loved him dearly, he had a second son Sammy Washington who was always eager to learn the business and had his fathers ferocious temper. He also had twin daughters who ran his heart, he was married to his wife Debra for over 34 years and she was the only person who could calm Freddy down, she ran everything associated with the families money, dirty or clean.

It was a night filled with excitement in the Washington family household, uncles filled the air with inappropriate chatter, drinks flowed faster than a cheap bar and all women whether old or young where in the kitchen. Rahim was in his room trying out different leather jackets and awkwardly pacing up and down the room, he was nervous and exited, he sat on the edge of his bed and waited for the call. 5 minutes later his dad knocked on his door and summoned him down stairs, he came down and everyone was waiting for him. He gave his mom and sisters a kiss and was greeted by stern handshakes by his uncles. All the males in the family got in their bus sized Cadillac's and drove in a concubine to the cities oldest cemetery in the outskirts of the city. The cemeteries silence was pierced by a loud ruckus of cars. Out came large bellied men with hard liquor in their hands all jolly which was a contrast to where they where at. They all circled around the largest tombstone in the cemetery, it was the tombstone of the first patriarch of the family, William Washington who started the family business and created a lineage of men who would do great things for the city. Rahim was brought to the front of the tombstone, he said his respects and drinks where spilled on the floor out of respect. His dad came forward with a knife, asked for Rahims right hand. Visibly nervous Rahim put out his hand. “Rahim as you do this you not only represent the family, you not only represent the great men who came before you, you not only pledge with blood your loyalty to the family, you do this for your kids and grand kids and kids after that so they can look back and learn about your bravery. This is the proudest day of my life, I am not a man of many words so I will just say God bless your journey and welcome to the mafia” his father cut his hand and Rahim let the blood drip onto his great great grandfathers tombstone, a loud cheer was heard and the family guns blasted the cold night sky, Rahim was now a member of the most notorious Mafia in the world.

Chapter 2- Family First

Autumn had come with all its orange splendor, the trees had ruffles of hazel and the roads where littered with leaves that had fallen to their death from skyscrapers of oak trees. The city of Fermount was cold all year round, even when seasons changed they really didn’t change and on this chilly day on a lonely road a black Cadillac cruised through the outskirts of the city, Rahim had just gotten his license but he had been driving cars ever since he turned 5. In the passenger seat was his best friend of almost 22 years Owen Rochester. Rahim and Owens mothers meet in the hospital while giving birth to them. They where in the same ward and development a keen friendship. Owens father was a drug addict who would hop in and out of his life. He had not seen him in about ten years and frankly he didn’t even care, Owen and his mother where considered apart of the Washington family and lived a street away from each other, birthdays, graduations, funerals and dinners where all spent together. Owen was a brother to Rahim and as much as he didn’t want to admit it Rahim saw him as a better brother to him than his own younger brother Sammy was.

“So how was the induction?” Asked Owen. “It was good” Rahim answered.

“Just good?”

“Yeah it was good what else do you want me too say”

“I don’t know you’ve been talking about this shit since you where ten years old I don’t know I’m expecting a bigger reaction than just good you know?”

“You know how dad is with this whole family shit”

“Negro I am family”

Silence held the air for a while, Unable to contain the excitement Rahim squeezed the rubber steering wheel and burst into a whole monologue about how the night went and how he was now apart of the family business. Owen knew he wouldn’t be able to keep it away from him, the family kept their business hidden from everyone including old friends but Rahim and Owens bond was so intact they shared everything together.  

“So you really not doing this college thing huh?” Asked Owen.

“Don’t see how’d it help me when I’m already set you feel me?”

“I get you man, I’m not even tripping, guess I’ll have to get all this collage ass by myself “ Owen replied

“Now you know your ugly ass ain’t getting no ass”

They both laughed and talked about their love lives and how they want families in the future. They pulled into a field, everywhere you looked was just filled with green, sheep’s grazed robotically and farmers yoked bulls up and down the green sea, ploughing away harvest for the city. They drove even further into an abounded farm next to a hill, they got out the car and had a smoke

“Gets colder every time we come up here” Owen said

“Get me the fuck outta here I can’t even feel my balls” Rahim said.

“I don’t know man I’d move here” Owen said. Owen always wanted the simple life, he was never in any drama and barely had a temper. This was not to say he was not about to jump into the front lines of war if need but when it came down to it he saw himself retiring as a carpenter on a farm somewhere. Rahim had different prospects, his always been intrigued about how the world works, who had the most power and what that power could do.

“Let’s hurry up maybe if we drop 120 on the way back we’ll make it back in time for the game” Rahim said

“Isn’t Jacky Robinson on the field today?” Owen asked

“Yeap”

“That’s one bad brother, running a mud hole on all those white boys”

They both opened the doors of the back of the car, they grabbed two shovels, went to the trunk of the car, opened it up and a bloody naked man in tears was in the back. They got him out and proceeded to walk him to the top of the hill, when they got there they dug a deep enough hole to fit a man of his size in it, they removed the tape from his mouth and he started begging to be let go and ranted every prayer he could remember

“Please Rahim I’ve known you since you where a kid how can you do this to me”

“This is what happens when you steal from our clubs you fat fuck” Rahim replied

He continued to beg and plead till Owen kicked him into the hole they had dug

“Any last words old man” Owen asked

The man cried and started praying in mumbles and piss ran down his leg.

Rahim and Owen both unloaded shots from their guns, buried him and hit the road to make it back for the game.

Chapter 3- Cindy Jackson

Rahim knew how powerful his family was, every cop, jury and judge where in their pockets, every club was owned or invested by them, they had built schools and grocery stores in every part of the city and they had been apart of the rise of Fermounts industrial complex since its birth. Rahim was greeted with respected every he went whether it be clubs or coffee shops but he truly discovered the power his family held when his father asked him to tag along with him to the mayors office in the early hours of the morning. They both wore their best suits and where driven to the capital to meet the mayor. Mr Luis Washington had been dealing with the mayors of the city of Fermount  ever since he was put in charge of the family business, this was nothing new to him. The mayor knew that the Washington family where involved in some illegal dealings but they kept a pampered hand on the family because of all the money they funded to the city. They got to the Mayors house in the upper scale of Fermount, it was where old money came to retire and still had a prestige to it, the Washington’s,  as wealthy as they where, were still looked down upon by the upper echelon of white American liberals. Rahim sensed this when he was greeted by the mayors butler who almost seemed to refuse to give him a handshake, Rahim being the spiteful type, grabbed his hand, pulled his arm in and gave him a great big hug. The mayors house was big but not as big as the Washington’s, this alone showed the power dynamic between politics and the mafia. They where greeted by the mayor himself coming down a long flight of stairs, an elderly white man, with whisks of grey hair in a brown jersey, work pants and black shoes. Rahim stayed back and watched his father converse to the mayor about everything from family life to sports. His father introduced Rahim to the mayor, pleasantries where made with his wife and children and they all sat around the table and talked about the state of the city, later on into the evening the mayor asked Rahim and his father to join him in his office, he poured both men his prized aged whiskey and they toasted to prosperity and that the Bulldogs winning the state final.

“So Rahim your father tells me you’re apart of the family business now”

“Yessir”

“I thought you’d take a liking to politics”

“No sir, that’s way too gangster for me”

There was a slight silent stand still in the room until it was broken by the Mayors laughter.

“Listen boys we have ourselves a big problem here in the beautiful city of Fermount and we need your families help, our piping systems are beginning to rust out, now with what my team is telling me they will ride us out into late October 1980 but after that, the water will be contaminated by the rust and I don’t need to tell you how much of a mess that is, the government implements new piping every 5 years and basically swap the rusty shit underground with new rusty shit which is a waste of money for them, for us and most importantly for me”

“So what’s your proposal mayor?” Rahim asked

“I see we have a eager one here Lewi, anyways New Guinea has a large steel capital, and these mother fuckers pump out steal day and night, I was thinking you boys can go out there, gather up all that steal and bring it down here with all your connections to ports and what not, we will brand the steal tubes and chuck them underground, now because they are slightly cheaper, and I mean cheap cheap boys, we would be making a large amount of money when the government gives us the grant to put in new steel pipes for the city and even bigger money when we sell those pipes to buyers overseas which you boys have such good connections with”

“I see” Mr Luis said

“ So with all the risk that we will have to carry I’m assuming our cut will be slightly larger than yours and your partners?”

“Well I’ll have to speak to my partners about that My boy” the mayor said

Rahim had not heard anyone call his dad “a boy” and was expecting him to leap over the table and ring the mayors head till he choked out and ran out of oxygen but he knew his dad was calm and could separate business and disrespect.

They left the Mayors house at midnight and spoke about the meeting, Rahims dad told him that he would be responsible for this project and over see everything, this was the most responsibility his dad had ever given him and he did not want to let him down

3 months passed and the project was underway, Rahim, his best friend Owen and his little brother Sammy headed for New Guinea, the minute they hoped out the airport they where meet with the islands warm intense weather, nothing they had ever experienced in the cold old city of Fermount. For the past three weeks they would be delegating with the government of New Guinea and setting plans for the exporting of 67 thousand tons of steel pipes and tubing. In the day Rahim went from meeting to meeting making connections along the way and going to mines with Owen, his brother Sammy spent his time banging different prostitutes in his hotel room and going into the islands club scenes, in his mind he was there for a vacation since he felt that his father didn’t trust him with this project. Rahim and Sammy fought a lot almost on the verge of killing each other but they where family and there was nobody you could trust more than your family. On the 2nd week Rahim had had enough of the meetings and decided to go into the market to witness the vibrant culture of the island, Owen decided to stay in and only God knew where Sammy was, as he was in the fruit aisle he saw a girl with large frizzy dark hair. He walked closer and was meet with the most sculpted face of beauty he had ever seen, he offered to help her with her grocery bags. She refused at first but he persisted until she couldn’t fight anymore. As they walked to her car he asked what she was doing in New Guinea but she was dismissive of the question, when they got to the car she realized that some local criminals where trying to steel her hub caps, Rahim dropped the bag and chased after them, tripped one of the criminals and punched his face in, he was able to get away and Rahim ran back to check on the beautiful women he had left behind.

“Are you crazy you could’ve gotten hurt!” she yelled

Rahim smiled and said “So you where worried about me?”

She smiled and said

“My name is Cindy, Cindy Jackson thank you for your help”

“Nice to meet you Cindy Jackson my name is Rahim Washington”

“I’m sorry I was a bit dismissive back there I don’t really know anyone here so you know, always keep your guard up” she said

“I get that, by the tied hair bun and medical supplies I’m assuming you’re apart of the UNICEF relief aid here in beautiful New Guinea?”

She laughed and answered“yes, yes I am, and I’m assuming your some rich business man here for business purposes”

“You can say something like that, so when you’re not saving kids where do you like to have fun”

“Well I’m going to the beach party at about 7, I don’t know if you’ll be there”

“Trust me, anywhere you are I’ll always be there”

They meet later on that evening at the beach party and Rahim introduced him to Owen. They danced and drank the whole night, the next day they walked around the plaza together and talked about everything

“So I’m leaving next week and you’re pretty busy here so when will I see you again” Rahim asked

“I’m leaving in 5 weeks and going back to school in Texas”

“So we’ll meet in Texas then?”

“Wait you’d actually come to Texas just for lil old me”

“Ma’am where ever you go from this point on I will follow till death”

She gave him her address and phone number and after a successful first meeting in New Guinea the boys jumped onto a flight back to the cold embrace of the city of Fermount. 5 weeks passed and Rahim flew to Texas to meet Cindy, they meet at a cafè and before they could say anything Rahim kissed her infront of the whole café.

“Well that’s one hell of a first kiss Mr Washington”

“It thought we should skip the small talk you know?”

They spent the summer together switching from Texas and Fermount, they meet each others families and in the summer of 1978 Rahim proposed to Cindy in her hometown and they moved to Fermount to start their lives together.

Chapter 4- We own this town

Houston Texas is bigger than the church hats mothers and aunties wear every Sunday in this deeply cultural piece of America. Everything is designed to pull you in like a gravitational force, the word subtle is not known in Houston. The restaurants and diners have food that would feed a whole village, the roads are wider to make way for every 20 year olds pimped out Cadillac. The women are chiseled from Gods personal special chisel, never lacking frame or body, it’s as if They were designed just to be looked at. There are churches in every corner of the town and the sun bullies the sky 20 hours of the day. Rahim always found it weird that Cindy would come from such a bombastic state. She was timid and slender, she never said a lot and when she did her voice was softer than the rustling leaves in the fall but her eyes held all the attitude that the state came with. She could look at you for a second and draw your attention from a mile away, she had the most generous heart it was almost bigger than her frizzy dark hair. Rahim had fallen in love with her all over again when he saw her walk down the aisle. The wedding came with all the dramatics of a church charity function, flights where delayed, uncles came from each direction with tales of their conquest and hard bottles of liquor, The Washington family alone came with about 200 people, each flying down from Fermount or driving. Weddings, baptisms and funerals where compulsory for the family and this was no ordinary wedding, it was the wedding of the future Patriarch of the family. Fermount was too cold to have such a joyous celebration and whether Rahim liked it or not Cindy held all the power of where the wedding was gonna take place. It took 7 months of planning and all the money invested into it you would think they where building a new club but this had to be huge, the Washington’s believed that a man only gets married once. The wedding drew mayors, delegates, owners of banks in both Houston and Fermount, baseball players and mobsters from all around the country. It was a 3 day festival with enough alcohol to fill the Nile and enough food to feed two starving countries. After the wedding Cindy and Rahim headed to Fermount where a 8 room mansion was eating for them, bought of-course by the Washington’s, 3 cars and  even a liltle puppy, life was blissful.

Winter had hit Fermount and it was colder than ever, the lake had frozen over, the trees where naked and everybody was inside. Not the mob though, trucks still moved city to city, clubs still operated and Rahim was busy delegating the implementation of putting in new metal tubes in the city. It was 3 years since Rahim stepped foot in New Guinea and it seemed like the project took years to get started but they where at the final stretch and money flooded in like well.. a flood. It was 7:30 in the evening and Rahim had just got back home. He shouted Cindys name and she answered, she was in the kitchen, Cindy was a genius in the kitchen. She spent her day working as a doctor in Fermounts top ranked private hospital and her nights going on romantic adventures with Rahim, He loved the fact that she was an all round working women. All the women he was used too including his mother had only been housewives. Rahim would get home, change, help Cindy in the kitchen and they would have diner and talk about the day and listen to records near the fire place with a glass of wine. Rahim was planning to do just that but as he was about to give Cindy a kiss he got a call, he went into the living room and picked up the telephone, it was his dad. His father never called unless it was something about business or family. Rahim knew it was important by the sound of his dads voice, he could always tell his dads mood by the sound of his voice and his dad was worried. He grabbed another leather jacket and leather gloves and jumped into his car. The house he grew up in was just a 15 minute drive. He got there in record time , kissed and hugged his mother and sisters, his brother was watching the reruns of the game, he was about to head out as well, they nodded at each other

“Where’s dad?”

“Where he always is”

Rahim went down to the office and found his dad in a dimly lit room smoking on a cigar.

“Hey pops”

“Hey, Rahim”

They gave each other a hug and took a seat

“How’s the wife?”

“You know still giving me orders”

Mr Washington laughed

“I’m waiting for my grandkids Rahim”

“I’m working on it dad”

“You better, I have a lot of spoiling to do before I leave this earth”

“You’ll be here for a long time old man”

They both took a sip of whiskey and with a heavy sigh Mr Washington reveled that his brother has been stealing from the family And selling critical information to the FBI.

“I can’t do it Rah, he’s my brother”

“Have you told anyone else”

“Only your mom knows”

“Fuck! His my uncle pops”

“I know”

“So you want me to off him”

“No! He’s family, he’s my brother, I’ll need you to take those brief cases, they have 500 thousand dollars, tell him to leave this city and never look back, he knows his family will be safe”

“I got you”

Rahim got in the car and decided to do it in the same night so he could get the weight off his shoulders, while driving to his uncles house he couldn’t believe that his uncle would do that, his own flesh and blood. He could see how broken his dad was, while Rahim went to deliver the news and brief cases to his uncle his dad went to the baptist church house, he always went at this time, he would just sit at the back of the church, say a little prayer and go back home, he believed he had done to many evil things to sit any closer. Rahim got to his uncles house greeted all his nephews and asked his uncle if they could take a drive around the block for some liquor cause he felt disrespectful coming into the house with nothing in his hands, he also didn’t want to tell him the news where anybody could get the chance of hearing. They went to the local liquor store, and when they came back into the car, before he could start the car he told him why he came to see him

“You dare accuse me of betraying the family you little shit stick”

“Dad sent me here Unc”

“Tell my fucking brother to come see me himself and not send his little fuck head of a son too send me a message”

“You broke him Unc, you broke us”

The car was silent until Rahims uncle asked

“So is that why you’re here with that briefcase, you want me to leave my family”

“We’ll give you time to say goodbye but you have to leave before the rest of the family hears about this”

“All the shit I did for this fucked up family and this is how you thank me! I gave my heart into this business, before you could even walk I was in the front lines of war and what do I get, FUCKING NOTHING! Your father does deals with presidents and what do I get nothing no appreciation no reward, I just want what’s mine”

A tear dropped from Rahim’s eye, he knew where this was heading,he knew that his Uncle was stubborn and this would end bad. His uncles voice turned raspy and he started crying

“I just wanted my share Rahim, I’m not going anywhere, I rather die than run away like a coward, they got the drop on us Rahim, you think all this fancy shit comes without a price, this car, your house our whole lives are built on the blood of our enemy’s, and I’m not going to go down without a fucking price, I need to go”

As he grabbed the door handle, Rahim held his shoulder and told him he can’t leave

“You think I’m gonna listen to you Rah”

His uncle took out his pistol and pointed it at Rahim

“Let me go Rah”

“Family first unc, family first”

With a quick motion, Rahim drew his gun and shot his uncle in the stomach, his mouth open in shock and tears coming down his face he drove back to his dads house, ran passed the living room and collapsed on the couch in tears, he told his dad what had happened and he burst out in tears. His mom came down and saw her son on the floor drenched in blood and her husband in tears and knew exactly what had happened. Rahim kept on saying he was sorry to his dad, his dad came back to his senses , asked Rahim where the body was and Rahim told him that he was in his trunk, he grabbed his jacket and his mom gave Rahim a kiss and told him it was all going to be okay, they drove to the local bar they owned, it was about to close and the owner, a close family friend was about to lock the door when Rahim and Mr Washington suddenly burst in, they told him the story and without hesitation he agreed to help, they layed his body next to the bar and staged it as a hit. Rahims dad told him to go back home and everything was going to be okay, he could not stop repeating the words “I’m sorry”. He drove back home and fell to his knees at the door, Cindy came down and helped into the shower, washed the blood from his body while Rahim told her what happened , she knew Rahims family was involved in the mob life but this was her first encounter with the seeds that the mob life had sworn, she grabbed his clothes and threw them in a fire and held Rahim the whole night.

As expected the next day the whole family was in awe when they heard the news, retribution had to be delivered, Mr Luis paid a hefty amount of money to another mob family to take responsibility for the hit and to sacrifice one of their men for retribution. For the next few months Rahim had nightmares and held a guilt that took over his days and nights. Cindy was there right by his side throughout the whole way. They decided to take a vacation to Rio and when they came back Rahim seemed to have left his guilt in the warm waters of Rio and came back ready for business

A new mayor had taken seat in Fermount and he had a no nonsense tolerance to crime. He worked with the government in stopping organized crime and had set out an investigation for the new metal pipes in Fermount. This was going to take a lot of money out of a lot of important peoples pockets and the family had no choice but to assassinate the mayor but they had two problems, if they did chose to assassinate the mayor they would start a war with the US government who was on their tale but for the latter part of the years has kept a distant leash on them, the family had the backing of men who only saw money so they could handle a war with the US government but the other problem was financial backing from banks, and even though they had investments in most of the cities banks, the government could stop all that cash flow. After numerous meetings with the family, delegates and dirty politicians they decided to go ahead with the plan. High investors decided to pay the family 20 million each as insurance that if the US did fledge out a war, their investment and money would stay intact, if the US didn’t start a war, which was unlikely, they would give back the money.

Mr Luis gave the job to his son Rahim. Rahim asked if he could take Owen and because Owen knew about the inner dealings of the family his dad agreed agreed, Rahims brother Sammy had left for Paris and did not tell any of his family members, atleast they knew where he was this time. Before he left for the job Rahims dad gave him a hug

“You know you get older everyday I see you Rah”

“Not as old as you old man”

They both smiled

“I wish your brother had as much  love as you do for me”

“Don’t worry dad his just going through a phase”

“I guess so, Rahim never forget that we are not rich because money and jewels alone but we are rich because of knowledge, with the right information we can bring a country to its knees”

He gave him a kiss on his forehead which was weird cause he never showed any affection. He only gave kisses to his wife and daughters.

“Oh pops I have something to tell you, uhm I was gonna save it for the family dinner but..”

“Then save it for the family dinner Rah, we’ve got a job to do”

Rahim and Owen waited outside the country club where the mayor played golf from 2 to 3pm, after that he took a drive to the barbers spot to get a shave and catch up with his father who was the owner of the establishment, after his golfing session they followed him to the barbershop, they took out their ski masks from the glove compartment and AK47s from the trunk of Rahims car and walked towards the window of barber shop and let all rounds go, glass and bloody bodies where on the floor, Rahim walked into the barber shop, looked the mayor in the eyes while he was on the floor trying to clench his fathers body and shot him dead.

They came back home ready to tell the family of the successful mission only to find a large fleet of cars at the family home, Rahim ran into the house and found out his dad had collapsed from a heart attack and had died. Every man and women had tears in their eyes. Rahim had cried out all his tears for a day and knew he needed to be there for his family.

The funeral was the biggest the city had ever seen, bigger than the mayors funeral, the government was on the family’s tale closer than ever before but that had to wait for now, mobsters and gangsters from around the world came to the funeral. If felt as if the president of the United States was being laid to rest. Rahim delegated the whole funeral, every flower in the city was thrown into Mr Luis Washington’s grave, speeches from Delegates and diplomats from around the world pierced the cold air and food was served to feed the whole city. Throughout the whole funeral Cindy stood besides Rahim and his mother, he went to say a few words with his wife Cindy in his hands.

“Goodbye old man, we’ll meet each other again, and I can’t wait for you to meet your grandson, I love you”

A few days after the funeral, Rahim was brought into a room with all the males of the family, all the investors of the family and all the mobsters of the city, he was being inducted to being the new leader of the family and family business. He walked to the head of the family, raised his glass of whiskey and said

“To the family”.

Chapter 5- From Russia with love

It seems every hospital has the same cold air rushing through it, the same bland light blue textiles and blinding florescent lights. It’s a place designed for anxiety and for being uncomfortable, but the Fermount Saint Private hospital was in for a rude awakening. The Washington family flooded the entire top floor maternity ward   With leather jackets, southern brute accents, wails from toddlers, chatter from Aunties and mothers and silent prayers from every grandmother that was there. Every doctor or nurse that walked by was harassed by endless questions that they had no jurisdiction answering. The walls swelled with belly carrying males with expensive clothes and pungent cigar aromas. The top ranked maternity ward in Fermount had now been turnt into the Washington family reunion. Rahim came bursting through the door with a face mask on, blue scrubs and gloves, after a second of silence Uncle Elijah finally asked

“Well boy, spill it”

“It’s a boy” Rahim answered.

Everybody in the ward cheered, mothers sang, and uncles shook hands as if they had broken a new millionaire dollar deal. Rahims mother walked towards him and kissed him on the check and said “Your father would be proud of you Rah” even Rahims brother Sammy came over to give him a handshake and a warm head nod.

It wasn’t minutes till the entire family trickled into Cindy’s hospital room to get a glance of the baby, mothers came in first, then Cindys family and some of Rahims uncles. Owen came in the room kissed Cindy on the forehead and gave his friend who he had grown up with and just watched turn into a dad a great ol hug. They decided to name the child after Rahims dad to honor his name.

The baby was greeted with a convoy of cars all hooting in tune, food was prepared as if it was a wedding or a great fest, in all sense of the matter, it was. After Mr Luis Washington’s death the family needed something new to celebrate, Rahim had taken over fully, only taking delegation from his mother, wife, Owen and Uncle Elijah Uncle Thomas who had guided Rahim into the big seat he had taken over. He had met all the big names he had only heard about in meetings and they all accepted him with warm arms, he knew that as long as he did a good job everyones pockets would be full. Since the government was behind their tail ever since the mayors death they had to operate all legal business only and lease or pause all illegal business but even that didn’t deter the government. They sent sanctions to every Washington owned asset , clubs, houses, cars, banks and new building projects. Rahim knew they couldn’t win a silent financial war. He knew at some point they would need aggression to either scare or hold of the government. So After 3 months of being home with Cindy and the baby. Rahim took Owen, Uncle Elijah and Thomas and his brother Sammy to Russia to negotiate a weapons deal Incase things went sour for the family. When they got there they wasted no time. The President of Russia invited them for dinner. The dining hall was full of deep colored tapestry and wild animal heads. After a dinner with jokes and impromptu Russian lessons they went to the president’s bunker to talk about why they where there. Russia was gearing up for a Cold War with the US and as far as they knew it, if the US could have a civil war it would be better for them but they needed assurance before striking an arms deal with the Washington family so they decided to give the Russians half of their crucial assets, mostly banks and government information they had acquired over the years.

More than ever the war was closer than it had ever been, the US had always had a vendetta with the Washington family and their power but now that envy would be put to the test and Rahim needed to make sure his family was safe, even if they lost.

Chapter 6- Cape of good fear

It is said that while the world sleeps, America watches it sleep. As soon as Rahim, Uncle Elijah and Thomas, Owen and Sammy set foot back on American soil, word had spread that the Washington family had made their way to Russia to negotiate an arms deal. This came to no surprise to Rahim because he knew that they where under immense pressure under the eyes of the government. In fact this is why he chose Russia. There are many countries that would agree to an arms deal but Russia was America’s biggest enemy and with the middle stages of the Cold War, it was bound to ruffle up some feathers. With this move Rahim put The Washington family in the four front of history. The US acted quick, by the end of the week it had already smeared the Washington family name in the press and used the only power it had, money and corruption. They seized all assists the Washington family had with ridiculous warrants and permits. Rahim knew that he was in the end game now. So he set up a meeting with the family delegates, elders and mob bosses from around the word. They all gathered in an underground bunker space in the towns baseball stadium that the Washington family had helped build a few years ago. As far as he knew it everyone’s house was already bugged so they needed somewhere neutral to congregate. The room was full of hazy grey smoke, the atmosphere of the room was heavy, all men in this room had something to loose and they all counted on Rahim to keep that. Rahim walked in the room with a butterscotch trench coat with black leather gloves and heavy winter boots. He took his seat and greeted all the men that where there.

“Gentlemen, as you know we don’t have enough time we need to strike with action, I am not here to waste your time and I am not here to cover my ass”

“Seems like your ass is blasted all over the newspaper every single day Rahim” one of the men shouted. Rahim wanted to respond disrespectfully, in fact he wanted to shoot the man right in-front of everybody but the man who made that jittery statement was the owner of the United States pharmaceutical industry. These men literally funded America and had ties to the mob. This was not a meeting with his drunk uncles or petty criminal bar meetings, every man in this room, with a flick of a button could shut down the United States and Rahim knew the stakes.

“I know that Mr Johnson, this is why we are here to fix that” Rahim him replied

“Now, the United States has a problem with the Washington family, and since you are all tied to the Washington family they have a problem with you. I am here to tell you that this will not end pretty gentlemen. Men will be lost and money will follow. Now my job is making sure that money is not taken out of your pockets, yes this will be a bloody war but it will be a war designed to look bigger than it is”

They whole room perched eagerly to hear Rahims proposition

“We will strike war with the US government, but we will use the backing and power of mother Russia, now if we sell this properly to the media it will seem as if a US family made ties with Russia and decided to take down the government. And since Americans love their country so much and hate Russia and black people it will polarize all the other shit that we are doing on the side, but with this I will need your full cooperation, you have my word that money will return to your pockets and Business will run as usual but I need the word and trust of every man in this room, to stand by this family as we have stood behind you all these years. We will strike as soon as we can so focus is directly on us, the family. Till then I will need you to freeze all assets so that nothing is traced back to you, now obviously we know the government has been following us for years and know who we work with but removing all traceable evidence will make them look like fucking loons when they make these accusations, there will be no hard proof. We will set up mini hot spots where they can catch us and have a field day in the media while they suck each other off, yes we will loose a considerable amount of money but that will give us enough time for the Russian Calvary to strong hold the US and ultimately make a deal with us”

“And you sure this will work?” A heavy built gentleman in the back asked

“Sir this is the only option we have to keep  the United States alive”

To keep a low cover Rahim decided to take Cindy and the baby, Owen and his family, his mother and brother to Cape Town South African. He had a vacation home there and he wanted his family especially his wife to get out of the toxic environment that they had ended up in. Rahim took early walks in the open wine fields with an elderly farmer named Abè who was a family friend, his farm imported 80% of the wine in the United States.

“You know Mr Abè this place is so beautiful I wouldn’t mind living and dying here”

“Mr Washington if I may be frank with you, you will not die here”

“Why do you suppose that Mr Abè, do you think I’m not worthy to die in a beautiful place like this?”

“You are a soldier, your daddy was a soldier and his papa before that, ever since I’ve known your family all the men have died in cold places. This is not because you are not worthy, it is because you are a soldier! You make way for your family to live and die in paradise, this is your calling. You where forged in fire It is a thankless job and an even bitter death but I believe if you where to chose to die in paradise or die in the field of war for your family, you would ask me where the battle field was”

“The battlefield is looking clearer to me every day Mr Abè”

“I know Mr Washington, I know”

Chapter 7- The world needs you Mr Washington.

Rahim had cleansed himself of the guilt of going to war for his family in Cape Town and had come back to American with a clear mind and even clearer intentions. If this was going to be the families time to be introduced into the world, it would be a monumental introduction. When he got back home he received a phone call, he picked it up and it was the one and only, President of the United States. He invited Rahim to the a White House for a meeting. Rahim didn’t know what to say. He knew he was in the big leagues but he didn’t know he would be speaking to the leader of the free world in person. He told his family and they where worried that it was a set up but Rahim knew that if they wanted to make a hit they would have done it already. Later that week he went to his fathers grave with Owen, he stayed in the car as Rahim went to speak to his dad

“Hey pops, I know it’s been a while. Just needed the courage to come see you again. Anyway,  the family is doing good. Your brothers are crazy as usual, ready to die on the sword for the family, mom is doing better. She’s worried about everyone but herself, if you can just let her know that she’s doing the best she can. We have a war in our hands pops. All the greedy men who took opportunities from our people not so long ago are afraid of us now, we have a meeting with the President of the Fucking United States. Look I know things are not gonna end up pretty but I wanted to let you know that everywhere I go I hold the family name high. You’ve done such a good job pops. Thank you, I ask that you guide me as I enter unknown territory. I love you”

The next day Rahim took a private plane to Washington DC to meet the President. He walked into the White House and knew they where in too deep, but he was the first Black man from Fermount to step foot in the White House. He was greeted by the President who had a huge smile when he saw him, it wasn’t warm, he had been around enough gangsters to know when a person wants something from you. They entered the office and began making small talk, after a few minutes the President looked at him and said

“You’re not scared are you?”

“Excuse me?” Rahim asked

“I came into this meeting thinking that you’d see how deep in the water you’ve swam into and would want to forfeit or break a deal but you want this don’t you?”

“Mr President, this is deeper than me, many men before me where stripped of opportunities, land, names and basic human dignity, to build this beautiful country and for me to throw that away now, when we’re at the last quarter would be a shame”

“It is a beautiful country isn’t it Mr Washington? we wouldn’t want the beautiful people in it to worry about it now would we?”

“I said it was a beautiful country, nothing bout its people”

“Be that as it may, you know we have enemies that would like to see this country fall and rumor around the farm is that you’re ur in cahoots with those evil people Mr Washington”

“Well that depends, where  are the rumors coming from Mr President?”

“The chickens are clucking Mr Washington, now this is simple we can go ahead with this in which I guarantee we will win and not only win but make an example out of you and your family or you can relinquish all “power” you have, I give you 2 days to say bye to your family and lock you up for the remainder of your days, and the way I see it, you don’t have that much left”

“Well Mr President I suggest you strap your boots up, it’s about to be a cold winter”.

Rahim came back home took a hot bath, went into his sons play room where Cindy was playing with him. He kneeled down and hugged Them both, Cindy grabbed his head slouched on the floor with him and kissed him, she didn’t need to know how the meeting went. She knew the time had come.

Chapter 8- Too much Power

It was weirdly calm in the Washington household. Mrs Debra was handing out sweets to the kid’s running up and down the house, the wives where gossiping about what they thought was going to happen in the kitchen, and the men of the family where outside the yard around the fire. Rahim came in the house late with Cindy and their son, he had stopped to get more liquor and presents for his mom.

“Sammy can you help Owen with the shit in the car, his outside”

Rahim proceeded to hug and kiss everyone in the kitchen, the living room, the dining room and finally the fireplace. When the food was ready Mrs Debra called everyone in the dining room, Rahim was put at the head of the table. There was so much food it felt like it would fall off the table, when everyone had stuffed food to the rim of their plate Rahim stood up with his whiskey glass to make a toast.

“Family, we’ve Always stood firm against the storm of evil souls that have tried to destroy this family, as I look at you I see the generations that our ancestors helped build, look at us, beautiful as can be, intelligent as can be, wealthy as can be. And all this came with hard work, from each and everyone of you. I just wanted to thank you. For being what you where meant to be, Beautiful, well except for Sammy...I’m just joking”

The rest of the night was filled with laughter and reminiscent chatter, photo albums where open, Motown jams serenaded the atmosphere and children danced for hundred dollar bills. The next day Rahim took Cindy to the hair salon uptown.

“Ayt baby I’m just swinging to the hardware store for the drill and I’ll pick you up in an hour”

“See you soon Mr Washington”

They kissed and Rahim was off to the hardware store, he decided to spend an extra twenty minutes just glancing at things he was not going to buy, this was better than chatting about future baby plans with the ladies of Cindy’s salon. As he turned the corner into the road the salon was in he saw Cindy already outside talking to one of the shop vendors. He also saw a black car across the road from Cindy opening its windows. A silver pistol poked out the window and fired 7 shots, Cindy fell to the floor, opened her bag and fired 3 shots herself. Rahim sped his car but the the car sped across the intersection and had left a trail of cars jumping into the wrong lane. Rahim quickly came out of his car and ran to Where Cindy was. His heart felt like it would beat a hole out of his chest, tears already streamed down his face, he fell to the floor next to her.

“Baby are you okay! Are you hurt! Where did they get you!”

“I’m okay I’m okay”

Rahim helped her up and patted her body like a mad man to check for blood but she was okay. They rushed quickly into the car and sped to get home. Cindy rushed into the house and hugged her son and Rahim held them both. Later that afternoon Rahim sat by the fire with a glass of whiskey and a cigar. He knew that the government would attack but this was sloppy of them, they wouldn’t do it like this and even if they did want to send a message it would be more direct. He figured that one of the mobs had sold out. His head kept on seeing the silver gun that popped out the window of the car. The more he thought about it the more it came to him that he had seen that gun, numerous times, in fact his seen that gun ever since he was 17. He rushed up to his room, put on his trench coat and jumped into his car, he sped to Owens house and told him what had happened, Owen grabbed his gun and jumped in the car with Rahim, they drove to Sammy’s house, Sammy saw Rahim’s car and ran straight into the garage into his car. He backed up the drive way and before he could make a turn to speed off Rahim’s car rammed into his door pushing it against the wall. When the smoke cleared Rahim pulled Sammy out of the car and into his trunk, they drove to the harbor and dumped Sammy into an empty space used for wrecked boat parts and broken cargo containers. Owen  stood behind Sammy pointing a gun at him and Rahim took a chair and sat infront of him.

“Now I know you’re a stupid mother fucker but this stupid Sammy, this fucking stupid! You’d turn your back against the family? Huh!”

“What fucking family Rah? Ever since I was born I’ve been pushed out of this family”

“Shut the fuck up, you chose to do that Sammy, not anyone of us. it was you, you play this wounded dog act to gain sympathy and even when you do get the sympathy you grovel for it’s still never enough”

“Fuck you Rah”

“My wife Sammy, you where the best man in my wedding man”

“I don’t give a fuck about you Rah, your little make shift brother here Owen, this family or that bitch you call a wife”

“You know, as I was driving here I thought of ways of killing you and to be honest, I didn’t have any, I realized I ran out of em, ever since we where young I’ve thought about killing you and I realized I’ve finally ran out of ideas cause I ran through them all, so I’m not gonna kill you Sammy. You’re still my brother. What you gonna do now is hop into that boat, it’s gonna take you to county island where you will hop into an aero plane that will fly you to Spain, to the worlds top ranked disability and injured rehabilitation center where you will spend out the rest of your miserable life, you’ll call mom every week and tell her nothing of what you did or what happened, tell her you couldn’t stand being in the family anymore or whatever pitiful shit you can muster up your ass this time”

“Why the fuck would I go to a disability center in fucking Spain”

“Because Sammy, when we’re done with you, you’d wish that we killed you”

Owen grabbed a chain saw and gave it to Rahim, Owen then singled three men into the room and they rolled a table into the center of room. They pinned a screaming Sammy onto the table.

“So I cut right into the born doc?” Rahim asked one of the men

“Yeap, he’ll feel everything we just have to make sure he doesn’t bleed out and stays conscious”

Sammy cried and pleaded with Rahim, he screamed for help but only heard his own echo and the motor of the chain saw, Rahim cut  Into the flesh of Sammy’s legs, blood splattered in every direction, Sammy’s cries could be heard from the end of the world, Rahim slashed and cut both Sammy’s legs, he put down the chain saw, looked at the agony on his brothers face, looked backed at the chain saw and asked the doctor

“Can we cut his hands aswell?”

Sammy, leg less and armless was then put into a boat with medical equipment to keep him alive. Rahim had taken the one thing that Sammy used his whole life, his freedom and without that he was good as dead. as the boat disappeared into the dark blue waters Rahim gazed on it with tears in his eyes, and a pool of blood drenched on his body. Owen put his hand on Rahims shoulders and said

“It’s time to go home man”

The US governments had sent their first shot and used Rahims own flesh and blood. He knew that they would play dirty but this was a hit he was not expecting. He gathered up all his family members and sent them into different parts of the world, the Washington family had friends in every part of the world, they also had money invested in every part of the world so it wasn’t hard to pack everyone up.  He flew his mother, Cindy and his son, uncle Thomas and Elijah and Owens wife and kids to South Africa in Abè’s estate. He then made a call to Russians to send down fire arms. Within 5 days they where packed and delivered to the Fermount boat harbor. Rahim ordered bombs to be set off in the heart of the United States, Washington DC. On March 2nd 1987 the first civil attack by the Washington family was felt the world over, twelve thousand people in the senate where killed as the US presidency held their annual democratic  state meeting. News traveled fast of how a terrorist family had shaken the very foundations of  the United States. The president called for an immediate call of action to stop the Washington family. Rahim knew that they needed more help from Russia but when he called the president he told Rahim what the US had done, the US government knew that the Washington family was getting backing from Russia so they promised to send a nuclear bomb if they didn’t stop working with the Washington family as they would have grounds to consider Russia as an accomplice to US terrorist attacks.

The US army and Federal Bureau of investigations took to the city of Fermount to find and kill Rahim, he knew that they would eventually catch him so he decided to meet his family in South Africa, and fly with them to Alaska. As he loaded his getaway truck with Owen, US soldiers burst into his yard, they had gotten through the heavy guarded gates and made a B line for the drive way. Rahim and Owen Took the underground get away bunker, a bullet hit Owens legs and he fell to the floor. Rahim tried to pick him up as they made it out the bunker into the exit to the woods. But Owen had lost a lot of blood, He couldn’t continue anymore, with tears in Rahim’s s face he pushed to carry Owen and fell to the floor. Rahim screamed and used all his might to try pick him up but they were slowing down. Owen grabbed his friends hand and said “it’s okay”

“No man I can pick you up don’t fucking give up on me Owen”

“Mate we can’t do this, you need to go, we’ve made it this far man this is where our journey ends”

“No Owen please” tears flowed down Rahim’s face and it felt like he was crying out his soul.

“Listen, tell Elizabeth I love her man, tell my kids about me everyday and tell them that daddy loves them with all his heart, take care of my kids man, take care of my fucking kids Rah, please man”

“You have my word brother, I love you”

Rahim kissed Owens hand, got up, looked back one more, nodded his head and said goodbye to his friend”

Owen took out his gun and put it to the temple of his head.

As Rahim ran through the woods he heard a bang, stopped, looked back for a second and continued to run.

Chapter 8 - let blood run

Rahim had thought that there was no place colder than Fermount, until he spent his first night in Alaska. It was so cold that you would think your thoughts where frozen, it didn’t make it any better that they had a house on top of a mountain but like any good Washington he adapted, his family adapted,  to the conditions, to the constant paranoia, to the inevitability of being caught and to the realization that they would probably never see their families again. Two years had passed since the US government seized every Washington asset known to man. Many of the Washington men had been incarcerated on false chargers and the government paraded the end of organized crime. Rahim’s promise held strong though, none of his business partners where harassed and business continued to run as normal even if it was on a smaller scale. The government realized that Rahim’s plan worked, they had chased the wrong people and because they paraded the end the Washington family in the media they could not go after the real partners of the Washington family. Firstly because they didn’t know where to start without the head of the Washington family. with every Washington man who entered those jail cells not one word was uttered about the families dealings and partners and secondly the public would accuse the US government of wasting money in finding the sole proprietors of organized crime when they had experienced their first recession in 70 years and still had a drug and Cold War to fight. The US President was persistent on finding Rahim and after two years of sniffling him out, the US government made its way to The Alaskan mountains.

Rahim and Cindy walked down the mountain every morning to collect bore water while Mrs Debra and Rah’s sisters set up the table for breakfast. Luis Jr loved the snow and would play in it all day. He had grown so much and looked exactly like Rahim. The morning was colder than usual but the sky was clear, Cindy noticed that Rahim was tense and didn’t talk much during the hike down.

“Baby, you okay?”

“Huh?”

“I said are you okay?”

Rahim looked into her beady eyes, the same eyes he had fallen in love with when he meet her in New Guinea. Her nose was colored with a brush of red, her skin glowed and her hair was full and vibrant. He kissed her and said

“It’s time hunny bunny”

“Time for what Rah?” She replied

He put down the buckets in his hands and grabbed her shoulders.

“They’ve found us”

As if choreographed, one tear dropped down Cindy’s cheek and she asked

“How long do we have”

“How long do you You guys have”

“Wait what, you can’t stay Rah they’re gonna kill you”

“If I leave with you guys you’ll always have a target behind your back, we’ll never grow old and sit on a porch in our big home in Texas and watch our grandkids play in the yard if I don’t do this”

“But babe-“

“Baby listen, what did I tell you in that island bar in New Guinea?”

“That wherever I go you would follow till death”

“And I’m not gonna break that promise, okay”

“Okay”

“Immediately after breakfast a car will come to fetch you, mom, my sisters and Luis Jr. it will drive you to an old military flight school, if you don’t see the military flight school in about 30 mins after you leave from here I want you to shoot that mother fucker clean in the head. You’ll be put in a plane that will fly you guys to New Guinea”

Cindy smiled and kissed him.

“Now I want you to take the black brief case under our bed and give it to Abè, he’ll be waiting for you when you land, and whatever happens-“

Before he could finish what he was about to say Cindy hugged him and said, nothing will happen, we’ll see you soon okay”

“Okay”

Night hit the Alaskan mountains and the fog had masked the house in blinding white snow. Rahim sat alone in the dining room of the small wood house he had made a home for the last two years. He looked around the kitchen and smiled thinking about all the meals they had in here, maybe it was the cold or because the wooden house was so small that they had to be in each others faces but this house reminded him of Fermount, it reminded him of when his dad used to take him and his brother to baseball games, it reminded him of the nights in parking lots he would speed with fast girls and his best friend Owen and it reminded him of waking up 10 minutes earlier just to watch the sun kiss his wife’s face as she woke up. He knew that he would have to sacrifice something if he wanted his families name to live on, he knew the stakes would be high when he drenched his blood on that grave and he knew his dad would be proud of him. As the night lingered he heard commotion and he knew they had arrived. The Alaskan police force together with the US army burst into the property with vehicles going up to the house. Helicopters flew over the mountain with bright lights illuminating the little wooden house. Rahim waited until the vehicles made it close to the house and without warning a huge explosion blew up the house together with the mountain, and an avalanche of fire engulfed every army and police car that was close to the mountain. Alaska was on fire.

In the next few weeks the press was flooded with news of how the US government had killed the terrorist Mob boss Rahim Jackson in Alaska. The New Yorker read

“The Washington’s wicked rain of terror has finally ended.”

Chapter 9 - We multiply

On the noon of August 24th 1991, US government files where leaked to the media. With evidence linking the US government to war crimes, plans to invade Oil countries and civilian surveillance with news of government corruption being leaked on a daily basis. This hit the US government like a shit storm, the public wanted answers, the United Nations condemned the US for its inherent evil human right violations and in every state of the US and every country in the world civilians rioted and protested for answers. The US economy took a hit and trade sanctions were discussed. The White House was frantic and no one had heard anything from the president, he was not answering any calls and he didn’t send out even one press conference. As the president talked to his delegates in his office his secretary burst into his office and said

“Sir you have someone on the phone for you”

“I think it can wait Mika I’m busy with something here”

“Sir, you’re gonna want to take this”

He knew who it was but he didn’t want to believe it, he walked slowly to the white plastic telephone waiting for him on his secretary’s desk, as the delegates, counselors, mayors and military advisors watched, he picked up the phone

“Mr President, I believe I have something you need, I think it’s time we struck a deal don’t you think?.”

The end.

[hirakdesherrani]

I was going through your blog, and you seem to criticize Shivaay a lot. But you don't seem to criticize Om as much who is no good either. I know Om started out good but after his character was butchered, there is no difference. At least Shivaay has shown a great character progression, and as of now he is the better man and husband. Not to attack you, 'cos I know everyone has their favs, but Omkara has flaws too.

Okay, so this ask has been licking dust in my inbox for weeks now. At the cost of seeming rude, I didn’t answer it ‘cos I just didn’t know what to reply, and tbh, didn’t feel like replying either.

Anyways, I’ll try now.

First things first anon, this is the first time someone has implied that Omkara is a fav of mine, which is farthest from the truth. Most of the times, I’m accused of hating on him ‘cos I’m blind Gauri stan, who’s white-knighting on her behalf (or so ppl believe). Secondly, LMAO anon, if only you had bothered to go back to posts I made last year, you would’ve seen how much I’ve criticized Om, much more than Shivaay, believe me.

Coming to your statements, lets see.

(Disclaimer: I’m in no way comparing abuse and saying who’s the worst among the two. Both are pathetic and don’t deserve the blessed presence of ‘any’ female in their lives, AniRi toh bahut dur ki baat hai.)

For the Shivaay v/s Omkara thing you mentioned:

As a husband, Shivaay >>>> Omkara. No explanations needed. (Post-their resolution of conflicts)

As a man, Omkara >>>> Shivaay, for the simple reason, that when Gauri told Omkara to GTFO, he accepted her decision and left. Unlike Shivaay, who took it upon himself to decide Gauri’s fate, because he thinks that he knows what’s better for Gauri than Gauri herself, which is damn patronizing. That Gauri chose to forgive Om is her prerogative, Shivaay orchestrating the kidnap was wrong. What if Gauri did not want to return to the Oberoi hellhole, then? Would he have kept her in the Oberoi mansion against her will, just to make his brother happy? I found the whole thing hard to digest, it was funny no doubt, but the underlying message was problematic.

As for character progression, well of course Shivaay has shown greater progression, because in the beginning of the show he’s a damn sociopath. Shivaay starts out as this Lucius Malfoy kinda character, who has rules about blood and lineage, who is proud about his ‘Naam, khoonn, khaandaan’ (just like pureblood nonsense) and calls Annika “road trash” (‘Mudbloods’?). Shivaay starts out from the very bottom, so obviously his growth will be greater. Omkara has his flaws, but as a character he was always better than Shivaay. Even in DBO when he was at the very worst of his graph, he still intervened to save a girl’s life, who he judged and hated, because that was the right thing to do. 

Both Shivaay and Omkara were put in the same situation re: Tia and Gauri. Both of them suspected that Tia and Gauri are lying about the pregnancy, and both had just cause to suspect. However, Shivaay never took any interest in Tia’s pregnancy, which made sense, because Tia was trapping him and he knew the child wasn’t his. It was Annika, in fact, who saved Tia from a miscarriage and actually cared for the baby indirectly, when she had all the reason to hate Tia and the child, because Annika is a kind soul.

Compare this to Omkara, who though acted as the judge, jury and executioner and decided that Gauri was not fit to mother that child (asshole!), but still actively cared for the unborn child who he suspected was not his own. We, as an audience, knew that Shivaay is right in his place, and Omkara is wrong in accusing Gauri. But as characters both Shivaay and Omkara were at the same situation, that is, they were unaware of what the other party had in mind.

Another reason why Shivaay’s character progression or redemption, has better sketched out, is because he is acutely aware of all the wrongs he perpetrated against Annika. Each and every instance, from suspecting Annika of selling the video to the media to the Daksh fiasco, every single misunderstanding has been cleared. But Omkara is not even aware of all the wrongs he committed against Gauri. Till date Omkara does not know the whole truth about Kali Thakur. He still only has a vague idea that he misjudged Gauri, that maybe she was forced into the wedding. The fact that Gauri was kept in chains, she was about to be married to three grooms, they were planning to make her their common sex slave for life, all this is still unknown to him. Even the buamaa truth, that Gauri was not lying when Kali captured Buamaa or even the fact that Gauri was not attempting to drown Buamaa in the swimming pool (for which he called the cops); all this is STILL unknown to him. How can he make reparations for everything he did in DBO, when he doesn’t even know the extent of all his sins in DBO?

And again, at the cost of repeating myself, even at his worst, Omkara did not derive any diabolic pleasure in ruining Gauri’s life. Unlike Shivaay, who put Annika in jail just because she refused to apologize for his arrogance. Annika would still be rotting in prison, if Dadi hadn’t bailed her out and Omkara hadn’t knocked some sense into Shivaay. Shivaay repeatedly fucked with Annika’s life and tried to make her miserable only for his ego. Annika was always at Shivaay’s mercy because Shivaay always used his power to abuse Annika.Contrast this to Omkara, Gauri was never at his mercy. Gauri was held hostage by the situation and had to return to the Oberoi mansion to save his dumb ass, but she was never at Omkara’s mercy. He did not make it a hobby to make her life difficult because that gives him sadistic pleasure. Omkara just wanted to get rid of Gauri and throw her out of his life. Which still makes him an asshole, but in all ways better than Shivaay. It’s just that Shivaay appears better than Omkara during DBO and after, because Shivaay was at the highest point in his character arc that time, while Omkara was at the lowest.

Coming to the last thing you mentioned about character flaws in Omkara. Sure, Omkara has a LOT of character flaws, you’re absolutely right there, anon. And those flaws are there even in IB 2016, its just that the audience puts him on a pedestal without analyzing his character properly, which is why the fall in DBO seems much more evident.

His biggest flaw is that he is STUPID. Like all the other problems and minor flaws emerge because of his sheer stupidity. Okay, that came out wrong. Omkara in the beginning of IB, is a Kalidas kind of character, who cuts the branch on which he is sitting. Unfortunately, stupidity is not seen as a character flaw, so most of the audience let it go. No wonder Om gets conned all the time, by Roop bua, Ishaana, Riddhima, Ranveer, etc. 

Because he is stupid, Omkara cannot understand the nuances of human beings. All his associated flaws, be it seeing things in black and white, or truth and lies, is because he cannot see the ‘grey’ or the ‘in-between’. To see and understand the grey, one needs brains and that Omkara does not possess.

Another thing is that most of the fandom thought that Om is more gender-equal than his brothers. But he has always been pretty misogynist from the beginning. 

Omkara put women in boxes. One was the good but victimized women (Box A): Jahnvi, Annika, even Pinky to an extent, who tolerated a lot of BS from their partners. And the other were women like Riddhima, Ishaana, Tia, who lied or used men for their own benefits (Box B). Of course, the worst was Svetty who was the ‘home breaker’ in his eyes. The first time he was confronted with this issue he chose to break up with Riddhima and Shivaay had to intervene and explain him that people are not good or bad, there is also the grey. The funny thing is that Om, who judged women harshly, never held Shivaay to the same standards. If he judged Shivaay in the same way, then he would have to put him in the category of bad people, which he refused to do. Hypocrisy much?

The second time when Omkara faces a similar choice, is when Mallika ran away from her wedding. Omkara categorically says that what Mallika did was wrong, even though he understands what compelled her. Again in that situation its Annika who makes Shivaay see sense, because Annika is an empathetic person. 

The thing is, whenever Om clashes with a ‘bad’ woman a/c to his judgments, he reacts badly. He was about to hit/get violent with both Ishana and Riddhima when he came to know of their betrayal. In both the cases, his brothers intervened and stopped him. Similarly he manhandles Svetty, after the whole engagement fiasco. 

The audience never held him accountable that time, because these women were wrong/used him. But the point is that even if these women were wrong, Omkara was also wrong in misbehaving with them. Manhandling or threatening assault to any woman is never right. 

This flaw comes in sharp focus only when Omkara meets Gauri, because unlike the other women before her Gauri is blameless. 

You mentioned the butchering anon. I know we all talk about how Omkara did a 360 degree in personality in DBO, even I say that. But in all honesty, he wasn’t butchered in DBO. His dark side which was suppressed in IB, came out in DBO. Like I explained before, Omkara was always violent with women who fell in category B. That coupled with his stupidity, which is why everyone cons him, spelled disaster for his equation with Gauri. 

If I have to be critical, Omkara was butchered badly only four times in the show (IB+DBO). When he throws money at Gauri’s face and crashes his car into her shop, when he leaves her to die at Kali Thakur’s hands after Chulbul reveal (which undid the very fact that he saved her from the villagers in similar situations the first time), when he shows complete lack of regret/guilt after Gauri leaves him post-inspiration argument and when he was drinking hot chocolate and going off to sleep after returning from Bareilly (instead of properly angstying and expressing regret in solitude) 

Coming back to the misogynist flaw, Omkara by the end of DBO did not know in which box to put Gauri in: due to all the lies and what he saw in Bareilly, he wanted to put her in Box B, but Gauri also put her life at stake multiple times to save his ass which confused him. On top of that, Gauri is not like Jahnvi or Annika who will stay with him despite all the shit he pulled. Gauri leaves immediately after the inspiration fuck up, which puzzled Omkara because Jahnvi never left despite the shit Tej did or Annika did not leave despite how Shivaay continued to insult her after their forced wedding. Annika in fact asked Omkara and Rudy to forgive Shivaay for the forced wedding BS that he did. [One reason why Omkara and Rudy misbehaved with Gauri, Soumya and Bhavya was because they internalized Shivaay’s behavior, ‘cos they saw that Annika forgave him despite everything, so they never expected these girls to dump their ass.]

I know a lot of people felt Omkara was OOC in many scenes in DBO. But actually on second thoughts he was like that in IB too, its just that in Ishana’s or Riddhima’s cases it was a one-off incident, but Gauri was forced to continue living in his presence to save him from Svetty and Buamaa, which made Om even more suspicious and thus, even more violent/verbally abusive. 

Baar haal, when you say character progression, sure Shivaay has progressed a lot from where he began. Omkara by comparison, had character flaws which he overcame post-break up with Gauri, when he realizes how wrong his stereotyping has been all this while, and how messed up his ideologies are. He learnt his lesson, and tried to implement that too, when he himself resorted to lies (as Dilpreet) to win back Gauri’s forgiveness. Character progression is more marked in Shivaay’s case because he started as a villain and went on to become a decent human being, whereas Omkara was in general a decent guy, with faulty judgments and anger management issues, which he sorta overcame. Of course, his stupidity cannot be cured. If one is stupid, then when is stupid, iska koi iilaaj nahi hai. Which is why he has a smart brother and wife to take care of him. 

I know you were not ‘attacking’ me for my choices, anon, but I thought to make it clear anyways. And hopefully, after this longass reply, nobody sends me an ask about the Obros, because writing about them just shoots my blood pressure.

[sonfaro]

@you-me-and-the-force-between-us Thank you for your rebuttal.  My response will be similarly long, and tumblr is being annoying so I’m switching to a new thread.

“Normal behavior isn’t always guaranteed by everyone. That’s life. Of course there are always going to be outliers of people who don’t think as they should. But they’re small compared to the number of people who CAN make these differences, so making comparisons like these are not only hurtful, but useless. It doesn’t matter WHAT language you use, somewhere out there–is going to fan over a serial killer or want to become one, because it’s not about language, it’s about personal experiences.” It DOES matter to those who are left behind.  To those who’s people are routinely NOT treated in this way.  Infantilizing dangerous white men at any level of media sets a tone.  To see that kind of behavior follow into fiction and NOBODY have a problem with it is beyond bizarre to me.  I’ve had friends locked up for far less who never got treated like the children they were, so forgive me if I’m a little sensitive to the subject. “People who sympathisize with these types of people are either going through some sort of fucked up, I’m edgy 100%, phase that they’ll grow out of or have some serious mental instabilities. It isn’t the media’s job to walk on egg shells with language,“ It’s the media’s job to present the truth with no spin.  When they do things like this, it absolutely poisons the well.  There’s no one to blame for his crimes but the monster, but there are people to blame for how that monster is viewed by the masses. “This other rhetoric about what’s being said and how it compares to fiction–it’s bullshit. And let’s be honest here for a second–just honestly speaking–looking through OP’s page you can very damn well tell this post isn’t done with good intentions in mind; it’s a clear attack on a group of people under the facet of being a good citizen who truly cares. Which also pisses me off.“ In what way?  I’ve literally seen someone claim that Kylo is ‘young’ and ‘doesn’t know any better’. That sort of language does exist amongst the fandom. “(I’ve seen people call others abelist for using the word crazy on this hellsite, but idc either way) “ You’re sympathizing with the villain is all.  Which is fine, “ Clearly it isn’t??? Because that’s OP’s point. That’s what OP has a problem with, saying that we’re like criminal sympathizers because we sympathize with a villain–so YES I agree, I’m JUST sympathizing with a villain IS ALL, nothing more. That’s the point.“ OP’s point is about the language being used: the infantilizing and woobifying.  I can sympathize with Erik Killmonger, but know he’s a grown man and his end in Black Panther is justified.  I’m not going to say “He’s basically a teenager lashing out” or nonsense like that - which IS a thing that Kylo stans have said. “ALSO JUST SO EVERYONE’S AWARE. This ISN’T the media saying this.“ Matt O’Donnell, listed below the lawyer in OP’s post, is a reporter.  He lists the killer’s status as an orphan (with no reason), his young age (with no reason), and suggests he had a ‘troubled’ background.  These are softening social cues. And the media doesn’t have to make these quotes the headline.  It is they who present these quotes as a worthy title for an article. “Darth Vader is one of THEE most popular villains of all time, and most people ADORE baby-fying him.” Not canon Darth Vader they don’t.  If you want an Alt universe Kylo (like Emo Kylo Ren) it’s whatever.  That's a separate idea. “He was Kylo BEFORE KYLO EXISTED–he’s WORSE than Kylo–so where’s all the hate there?“ I disagree.  Vader was a tool for the Emperor.  Kylo IS the Emperor now.  And the hate is largely gone because in canon Vader died sacrificing himself for the hero.  “Why isn’t the majority of the world turned into serial killer supporters by now?  A. The majority of the world isn’t into star wars.  We’re a big fandom, but the world is bigger B. and the majority of Vader’s fans don’t try to justify his actions.  He’s liked because he makes a great foil for our heroes. Why isn’t OP making a comparison to Darth Vader and attacking his fans? Again, Vader’s fans generally don’t make excuses for his actions. Because OP has an agenda to attack Reylos and make them seem like horrible people, because that’s just the way the shit rolls on Tumblr nowadays.  Agreed, he definitely does. “[...]Committing a crime due to violent media, is far less easy to prove, and there has been no direct connection thus far.“ Right, but your post flat said “It isn’t true”, and that has not yet been determined.  Hence my post. “All of these still prove my point–media alone does NOT transform you into a violent person UNLESS you already have a predisposition to being violent (like a history of abuse or a mental illness etc). It ISN’T true until you have enough statistics that back up your claim, and this doesn’t. What’s unhelpful, is not being well researched in a matter and making blatant claims. “ But I didn’t make a blatant claim about video games.  I literally said the jury was still out.  In response to you flat saying it wasn’t true.  -_- “The media compares Hux and FO to Nazism because there’s a legitimate comparison to make (I know some SW fans disagree with me, but there is blatant Nazism parallels imo), because that was done PURPOSEFULLY. They took one evil regime irl and were inspired by it to create a fictional one of it. Every writer and design EVER takes inspiration form real life things to create something, eve villains. But let’s give an example here of a rational comparison and a shitty one:- Hux is like a Nazi (this can be confirmed by the imagery in SW, and background information, etc)  - Hux is like a Nazi and therefore if you like Hux you like the Nazi party and therefore you’re a Nazi apologist. Hux is a Nazi and you’re a Nazi apologist.“ This is a bit of a straw man.  You’d only be a Nazi apologist if you thought Hux’s POV were correct.  Once more, liking a villain is fine - liking them to the point where your sympathy leads you to defend their views and actions is another thing entirely. “Saying that someone who likes Hux or the FO is like someone who might have agreed/sympathized with the deaths of millions of people is a HORRIBLE, inaccurate comparison to make (also Hux is LIKE a Nazi and Hux IS a Nazi are two different things, “ Again, that’s not what’s happening here.  OP is talking about a specific action (how shippers talk about Kylo). Not liking the character in general. “And if you’re going to make the point that forcing yourself into someone’s mind is akin to rape, and therefore Kylo’s a rapist (and therefore Reylos are rape apologists–no lie i hear this shit WAY TOO much) then guess what?Obi-Wan is a rapist.Vader is a rapist.LUKE is a rapist.”  I mean Vader definitely attempted to force himself into his daughters mind in ANH.  Dude was the villain.  The jedi mindtrick is more deception than anything else - morally suspect but not a painful violation unless there are more than one person doing it at the same time.  Which is the actual term Pablo Hidalgo prefers for what Kylo does to Rey in that scene - a violation. “She (or he idk and idc tbh) is basically insinuating that Kylo Ren sympathizers cause school shooters sympathizers.“ Or vice versa, that the media and how damaged white monsters are portrayed is the reason Reylo’s see Kylo as sympathetic.  Which was what OP’s excuse was IIRC.  Personally I think the fault for both lies more with societies internal preference for white dudes, but that’s my take. “//Also–just for future notice–I don’t suggest ever using a Buzzfeed article to support your claim because your credibility will go right out the window. Buzzfeed is a pandering shitfest that is really written more by biased bloggers than actual reporters. I suggest using articles without bias and an actual good writing team and reputation.//“ I mean at this point that’s every news organization ever - least in America as far as I can tell.  You can barely open a paper or watch the news without someone's opinion’s being clear.  And it’s hardly the only article: https://www.salon.com/2016/01/12/we_need_to_talk_about_ben_kylo_ren_star_wars_and_the_media_narrative_of_the_mentally_ill_school_shooter/ https://www.theverge.com/2016/1/1/10698090/emo-kylo-ren-star-wars-parody-twitter http://www.forcematerial.com/home/2017/11/5/we-need-to-talk-about-kylo https://geekmom.com/2016/01/trying-not-to-raise-kylo-ren/ Kylo being compared to real world evil isn’t new.  Shoot, there’s a bunch that link Kylo to the alt-right as well.  Double shoot, Adam Driver himself straight compared him to terrorists.  Kylo gets compared to lots of real world evil people.  It’s going to happen. “Yup that’s definitely what happened. It wasn’t like he literally saw Luke about to kill him in his sleep“ No, he LITERALLY saw Luke post realization that he was in the wrong but still holding his lightsaber (like an idiot) and jumped to the conclusion his uncle was going to attack him.  Luke’s behavior (which is a character assassination if I’ve ever seen one, but that’s an argument for another time) also happens only after peering into Ben’s mind and seeing nothing but evil.  Ben then definitely attacks his uncle after that - from his point of view in self defence, sure - but from the overhead view an unnecessarily. “Oh no–wait, I was wrong:“ ...the article LITERALLY lists him murdering the kids.  -_- “Oh so I guess it’s like I said before–people PICK AND CHOOSE their biases!! There is a UNMISTAKABLE comparison between Vader and Kylo FOR A REASON–the two ARE very much alike. But Kylo is a shooter and Vader’s tragic and grand?? GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE WITH THIS BULLSHIT.“ Uh, yeah.  Vaders complete arc requires six movies at two hours at least each to tell.  It’s pretty grand (lofty, big, etc).  His heel turn alone is a culmination of three whole films.  Also, the article presents Kylo as tragic as well, with Drivers portrayal being described as:  “a mixture of pain and hurt so raw it threatens to rend the fabric of the series every time he's on screen“.  Did you actually read it? “really made me want to pluck my eyes out. Holy hell my dude, why did you use this as a reference when it’s so clearly just—bad?? I think I lost five years of my life.“ Because it’s another example of Kylo being compared to the evil that is a school shooter.  Again, it’s not the only time, and it’s not the only horrible evil he’s compared to.  OP was insensitive about it though, given recent events. “And I want to make this clear–I don’t give a single FUCK if you don’t like Kylo Ren. That your opinion.“ I like his character a lot actually.  I think he makes an excellent, compelling villain based on Adam Driver’s work.  My issue is people attempting to pretend he isn’t one, or that his past trauma absolves him of ANYTHING he’s chosen to do, or that anyone owes him anything at this point, or pretending that this 30 year old man’s childishness can be justified at all.  My bigger concern is that sort of thing happens in the real world for folks just like Kylo and that the two often sound exactly the same. “ I CARE when you bring real people into stupid fictional shit and say “You’re the reason why this is happening. It’s YOUR fault things are this way” I don’t think that was OP’s point at all.  Least as far as he’s said. “ESPECIALLY when fiction is used right after a real tragedy like this. “ THAT I can agree with.  Dude was insensitive. “ It’s disgusting to be compared on ANY level with someone who might do something like this–and again–it isn’t true. “ No one compared you guys to the shooter.  How you TALK about the villain was compared. “ Read up on mental illness, debate gun control, read up on what actually causes school shooters to occur, look up psychological studies of BOTH sides, not just what Buzzfeed says–they aren’t accredited to make those calls in any way.“ The article I listed didn’t list the causes of school shooting at all.  Did you just skim it? “STOP accepting this shit behavior my dude. It ISN’T OK or educated AT ALL. It’s downright stupid.“ The behavior I don’t accept.  The point - that dangerous young white men are coddled both in and out of fiction - is all too true though.

[insecure-hbo-recaps]

hella shook

Previously: Issa wanted to get a roster going. Molly for some reason didn't know what it was about Sterling K Brown. Dro's marriage was open. Lawrence was used as a prop for a racist threesome. He lied about it. Issa and Daniel made amends.

Issa's in traffic in her fairly new model car I might add. She is on her phone at every red light and doesn't notice that she's on E. She's wearing a black and white cookie coat, look at this:

Ees! Jesus. She stops at exactly 9:45 cents because she's poor. She finally makes it to her destination, serving up a "special delivery, sir" for Daniel. They awkwardly joke about how silly she's being and he opens the door with a smug smile. They're very attuned and cute and happy and whatnot.

Hey! They got honeycomb towers in LA too, apparently. Unless this is a scene where Molly is skyping with Quintin in Chicago, which the immediate shot of an L lets me know it is. See?

God I fucking love my city. That's the green line by the way. (If you're not familiar with Chicago, this is what I mean by "honeycomb towers":)

They're downtown near State and Kinzie, where I once went out with a professor from Boston who I thought looked like Mark Zuckerberg. (Public House is the bar there.) We watched the world series where the red sox won that year and it had been such a fun date, I was really disappointed when I never heard from him again. Oh well - in hindsight whatever I wore is probably not something I would wear now.

Molly is actually in Chicago this time, and Quintin is helping her keep the associates straight. He's wearing a tan vest and Malcolm X glasses and is it this show or somewhere else where they make jokes about a preacher body? Because good grief if I don't think of an old timey Civil Rights Movement era preacher every time I see him, lol. Molly points out there's a lot of black people at this office, and Quintin says he doesn't understand how she could work in the LA office; it reminds him of why he went to Howard.

Quintin asks whether Molly has said anything about her pay inequality but Molly hasn't. He asks why she isn't considering leaving, because their firm is not the only fish in the sea. Obviously this has never occurred to Molly. It's like she gets blinders on about certain things she thinks are acceptable or that she should want or be doing, and is incapable of considering any options outside of that. Apparently Molly is stuck in a sunken cost fallacy, which means you end up sticking out a situation that has long since expired just because you've already invested so much time into it already. Quintin encouages her to consider her options. Oh, there's the "pastor's body" joke. He really does look like a pastor.

Back in LA, Issa is getting dressed while Daniel is still in bed watching Due North. He asks whether she has plans the next night, but Issa demurs, unsure of his intentions. Daniel's body is insane.

Elsewhere, Lawrence is on a run with his coworkers, the blonde and Arpana. He won't be at work the next day because he has jury duty. Another coworker shows up and we get the exposition that they are training for a marathon. I know people hang out with their coworkers like this but I am antisocial and weird so I never do and never have, which sucks. This is how most people make friends as adults.

Molly is back home now. At her apartment, she and Issa are preparing floral arrangements for Molly's parents' vow renewal. Issa can't make it because she has a "work retreat." Daniel texts, and off the look on Issa's face, Molly inquires about it. Issa tries to play it off, but Molly knows this is not nothing. "Daniel and I have history, but we always bounce back." Molly is skeptical that either of them can do this without catching feelings, but Issa insists none of that is on her agenda right now: she has Daniel, "Neighbor Bae," and a Latino man she is going out with that night.

Meanwhile, at jury duty, Lawrence gets a text from Derek inviting him to his birthday party. Lawrence hesitates, assuming Issa will be there, but agrees to go. Bored, he scrolls through his facebook and happens across a photo from the night of the Kiss and Grind party; apparently Kelli's pic accidentallycaught Issa smiling and chatting with Daniel in the background.

Now that is a stroke of bad luck. Lawrence is so distracted by this news he barely hears them call him for briefing.

Back at the We Got Y'all offices, the supervisor is expositing that they have a director position open. Naturally the overeager white dude thinks this is his time to shine. They are going to be having a retreat Saturday morning and wants everyone to partner up. Issa looks over at Frieda who awkwardly looks away. Issa decides to brush it off, but when she whispers a joke and Frieda continues to look uncomfortable, the smile slides off Issa's face.

She follows Frieda to the breakroom, asking to talk. Frieda tensely explains that she isn't comfortable with what's happening at the school, but Issa still doesn't see a problem. This was around the time I started to think Issa was in the wrong the first time I saw this season... not because Issa is siding with bigotry but because she doesn't know better than to talk frankly about racism with whites in the workplace. That fact that Issa was so clueless as to be straightforward with a Clueless White Person on the thing that they fear most - an issue concerning race where they may be even indirectly accused of being a GASP racist - just sort of underlined for me that she was compounding a wrong instead of fixing it. "It must be nice to have the privilege to choose to be upset over this," Issa says, and the fact that she doesn't back down lets Frieda get the moral high ground.

Inglewood. Molly is at her parents' place unloading flowers for the renewal. Dro is her childhood next door neighbor and he is there to a.) celebrate Molly's parent's marriage and b.) smooth things over about basically asking her to take part in his open marriage. He asks if she never thought of him like that; "I mean yeah maybe for a minute when you had your colored contacts on," Molly says. Light skints aren't still in style anymore are they? Exoticals for men is always kind of a weird area, I think.

Molly says she's thought about it, but the marriage thing "is just not how" she sees her life. Dro is cool with that and they agree to stay friends, ribbing each other like only childhood friends can do.

Jury Duty. There's black woman who answers a question about "bias against police" by standing up to reveal her Black Lives Matter t-shirt that I'm unclear whether or not she meant it or just wanted to get out of jury duty. "Not buying it," the judge says, but the juror is dismissed. Lawrence is scrolling through Daniel's gram while all this happens.

Back at Molly's, her mom is saying something about the dollar store champagne flutes she bought, and what is with moms and dollar stores? My momma loves her some dollar store home goods. They lightly push Molly, as you do your children, about when she's getting married. Mom wants to know what's the hold up but Dad knows Molly isn't going to settle. Apparently Molly has a brother, or two brothers, or a gay brother, I'm unclear. I think one of them is famous for something or other though.

Date night. Issa shows up at a low lit ambient bar looking for Mexican bae. "Come through, Tinder," she says when she spots him. She's wearing a tight blue dress and a TWA. Mexican bae seems like he's in his late 30s. Issa's inner monologue horndogs about horchata. Bruh, rumchata is delicious. I haven't managed to buy it myself yet because that shit costs like 20$ but it tastes just like Christmas. And like, really good bread pudding. I should try to buy it at least for the holidays. Anyway, Issa is fantasizing about boning him right on the bar.

We know he's a good guy because he says isn't a martini guy and they joke about comics. I can't with how comic book lore has taken over American entertainment. I liked the Tobey Maguire Spider Mans but now there's like 18 in-universe comic book shows on TV and like four comic book movies at any given time... I honestly thought the comic book thing would have faded a long time ago by now and we'd be back to some other mythical fan lore like angels and ghosts again. (Zombie lore is still popular, and I think vampire lore is still hanging ten, so we need to go to demons or the undead or something.) They eventually move to another table, signifying that the date has lasted a few hours. The waiter brings by the check and Issa does the fake purse grab. You know, I used to adamantly refuse to do that (and the one time I was *asked* to split was by a nerdy black dude I met in a hipster dive who approached me by asking if I was latina - I must emphasize that I do not look latina whatsoever), like even pretend like I was going to pay. Now, I just offer to split. I usually never have to still, which is good, but also, I'm not poor anymore either so. My thing now is taking care to note that the waitress puts the check on the guy's side instead of in the middle - that's when I know the universe wants me to feel good about myself.

Anyway, they have had a good night and Issa is clearly thinking about asking him back to her place. But, we know he's a Good Guy because he says he can't, "but this is an excuse for us to do this again!"

Saturday morning work retreat. There's a generic snack bar set up. Issa is texting with Daniel, after canceling on him because of her date the previous night. Anyway the work team does a boring team building exercise so that the Clueless White People can make Clueless White People assumptions about the kind of trouble kids might be having at home. Issa and Frieda take a few passive aggressive jabs at each other and when it's time to pair up Frieda quickly finds someone else, leaving Issa stuck with Sujata Day. I don't know if she's supposed to be Indian in this one.

Vow Renewal. Apparently Molly decided to invite Sterling K Brown who is wearing a crazy colorful suit like only a person whose body has been altered to look good in Hollywood could do:

Molly's wig actually does look good, don't mind the screenshot. Dro and his parents show up (his dad is latino, his mom is ambiguous brown). Dro hangs around as his parents walk off and Sterling K Brown possessively wraps an arm around Molly, who introduces them. Just so you know that this is going on:

Do y'all take notice of stuff like this or no? Men, even men who are supposedly friends with each other, I find pull rank like this in front of women all the time. I was seeing a guy and one night we were hanging out with his roommate. They went outside to smoke and I tagged along. My dude and I were sharing his cigarette (I don't smoke but I find this sort of thing cute) and the other guy offered me his. My dude didn't think anything of it, but it's little shit like that that always feels like to me men are playing ego games with each other and/or always prepared to slide in the DMs of someone else's girl. (I also tend to think everyone is hitting on me, so that bias tends to reinterpret things.) But, it's the subtlety. And I think if more people paid attention they'd notice things like this more often. At any rate, Sterling K Brown is clearly glad to be there with Molly and possibly senses that Dro is a threat. They all play polite and it's only mildly awkward.

At a bar across town, Lawrence is having drinks with Derek and grilling him for information about Issa and Daniel. Ha. That's way more straightforward than he usually is when he talks to Chad. Derek says that after Tasha, he and Tiffany had to stop discussing them because they always took sides. Lawrence is preoccupied and insecure about Issa seeing Daniel now... maybe she had been seeing him the entire time? Derek says Issa is too dorky to be sneaky. "That's exactly why you wouldn't expect it," Lawrence says. He clearly is reiminaging their entire relationship and second guessing what he thought it was.

"Honestly... this ain't all on Issa," Derek says. "You spent two years unemployed, not doing shit, letting your woman take care of you. Kinda left the door open." Lawrence does that thing of rotating his jaw and accepts this silently. He tries to say it doesn't justify cheating, but Derek says he understands why she would be attracted to someone who could make things happen.

Vow renewal. Molly's brother or whatever asks "is that you?" and HA! Haven't heard that in ages. "So it's a pity date?" he asks. Molly lists off his positive qualities and how she wants to give it a shot. Her brother says just because she dates a good guy that doesn't translate into a relationship. Her brother (no, her brother's best friend) apparently is married to a stripper that trapped him. He tells Molly if she isn't feeling him she shouldn't date him. And because Molly has no understanding of what she wants out of a relationship or from men generally, this is the point where she no longer understands if she should be on a date with Sterling K Brown. He doesn't deserve this.

Bathroom. Issa calls her brother to check whether or not she might be in the wrong with the situation with Frieda. Check out this gloriously dressed fashion forward ass nigga:

Issa's brother doesn't tell her what she wants to hear so she hangs up in his face. To make herself feel better, she responds to a random sext from Neighbor Bae, sending back a nude before she gets busted by Mrs. Frizzle. Issa, at least go into the stall.

Molly is partially hosting this party, so she goes to greet a couple of great aunts. As nosy older black women, they immediately start inquiring about the delicious slice of man she chose to parade around this family event. Which... if you're not sure if you want to date a guy, don't fucking bring him to a parent-centered family event maybe. The aunts start talking about how amazing it is that Molly's parent's marriage lasted 35 years "after what he put my sister through." This is news to Molly.

Issa is texting at a red light when she misses it turn green. A "Potential Bae" sends her a dick pic and she rear ends the car in front of her. This is where I stopped being on Issa's team. No woman, no self possessed black woman, has any business being so distracted by dick she would open herself up to litigation, the loss of transportation, and unspecified auto repair. Like, I can no longer abide this level of thirst. This was when Issa went too far. Also, I spared you a screenshot of the dick pic.

Back that the renewal, Molly is grilling her brother about the state of her parents' marriage. It turns out that Dad cheated on Mom and "they worked through it." Molly seems almost more offended that her mom put up with it than her dad cheated at all. And this is the part where Yvonne Orji had to do an emotional scene. And it was so bad it threatened to diminish my enjoyment of the rest of the series so what you need to know is: 1. the acting here is really really bad, so bad I don't know how they didn't insist on more takes and/or cut away often enough so that you didn't notice how bad it was and b. Molly can't deal with the reality that there is no such thing as a fairy tale relationship. Not all relationships have cheating but a fuckton of them do, so everyone needs to just chill. Also, remind me at a later date to tell you about how I recently found out a guy I had been seeing was married and his wife had their first kid earlier this year. It was fucking horrid. (This is not an endorsement from the "All Men Cheat" school of logic as I, personally, have never been cheated on in a relationship.)

Sterling K Brown tries to console Molly but she stomps away, leaving Dro to chase after her. Bitch move. Molly's being an asshole all around. Bitch, how are you whining about relationships when you left your fucking date at a party at your parents' house to leave with another dude? Molly is way out of line here, and her behavior deserves no sympathy at all.

Issa calls Daniel to let him know she can't make it tonight because she got into a car accident. He offers to pick her up. She tries to beg off but he insists, and his caring and eagerness to help is good to see. One of the worst things about being an introverted holier than thou asshole is that whenever I need help, it always hits me really hard that I really have no one to call.

Meanwhile, this is Lawrence's Saturday night:

GOD those are the worst, lol. He sits there ruminating for awhile and finally defriends. "I don't wanna see this shit," Lawrence thinks.

Dro is driving Molly home. So... she just gone leave her car (and her date) in the interests of her thirst or what? Because I'm not buying that she's so distraught she just needed to get home despite the common decency of leaving on no notice like that. You wanted to provoke Dro's dick and we all know it. No smoothing over on this ridiculous behavior, Molly. She continues being all "distraught," and while I have to offer points for the damsel and distress routine in principle, I believe in polite society more, so be thirsty on your own time, not when it inconveniences or hurts someone else. Molly laments how she spends all her time trying to find someone like her dad only to find out their marriage is bullshit. I suppose if I had grown up in a married two parent household it would come as news to me, too, that parents can be just as ain't shit as anyone else. Still. I find this childish. Dro lends a sympathetic ear and Molly eats it up.

Daniel shows up to pick up Issa and gives her a hug in reassurance since she's just been in a car accident. Instead of abiding this silently where even if she doesn't want it she can use it to her advantage at a later date, Issa decides to be clear that Daniel knows they are not dating only each other and are both seeing other people. Issa isn't sure if she was as up front about that as she should have been the last time they slept together. Daniel reacts disappointedly in a way that telegraphs he did not know that was what they were doing. On the other hand, I feel like men pull this shit a lot and maybe it was good for him to know he isn't the only fish in her pond. Idk. On this issue I have erred toward casual probably more often than I should have, to regretful effects, so for me the jury is out on that.

Dro walks Molly to her door and her building is so lovely. Oh, it turns out Dro drove Molly's car home. That kinda makes it even more shitty that she left Sterling K Brown? When Dro goes to leave, because we must be overtly aware of the stupid and ridiculous choices they make, she pulls him back and kisses him. Then we cut to them boning a second later. Excellent sex scene. Extremely poor choice.

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 1x08-- Reddick v. Boseman

When Adrian arrives for work, he finds his firm empty. No one is in reception. All the offices are empty. No one’s in the hallways.

As it turns out, everyone’s gathered in Diane’s office, sorry, the RBK conference room, listening to founding partner Carl Reddick give a speech. He’s a civil rights hero, and also, clearly, a magnetic speaker. He’s discussing the importance of fighting (show, did we really need a third scene about how they’re fighting on TGF? A third in three weeks?), especially in this political era.

Reddick, who we haven’t seen or heard anything about up to this point, is basically here to be RBK’s Jonas Stern. I am unsure why it’s necessary for RBK to have its own Stern, especially since Stern gets better, more memorable material.

Julius is for some reason still at the firm (later we learn he’s only there through the end of the pay period).

Reddick discusses his vision for the firm. “That’s what you all are. You’re fighters.” WE GET IT.

“Did you know he was coming?” Adrian asks Barbara as soon as Reddick’s done speaking. Barbara didn’t.

Reddick wants to meet with Barbara and Adrian, and Adrian calls Diane into the meeting, thinking it’ll be about police brutality cases.

It’s not. Reddick asks that only the name partners be in on this meeting. Since Adrian’s reply is that Diane is on the exec committee, not that she’s a name partner, can we take this as confirmation that Diane was supposed to say “full” and not “name” at the end of 105?

Diane is happy to step out, but Adrian insists she be there. Barbara agrees. “Hey, man, what the hell is going on here? I turn my back, and we’re being indicted. What, you got grand juries all over your butt, man. In the meantime, I have to find out from the L.A. Times that you just signed with one of the whitest companies in Silicon Valley!” Reddick exclaims. He’s also upset that they’re not working with a client of his (who, according to Adrian, hasn’t brought in any money since 2009).

Lucca walks past the argument. It seems that not only can you see everything through glass walls, you can also hear everything! She’s on the phone with Colin, who is trying to move their upcoming date to an art gallery. Lucca worries there will be too many people, but Colin tells her there will only be “like, eight people there.” And he’ll go down on her in the bathroom.

“I’ll text you the deets,” he tells Lucca. “Don’t say ‘deets.’ I hate it when you say ‘deets,’” Lucca replies. I’m with you on that, Lucca.

Back to the argument. “And what about your responsibility to the community?” Reddick asks. Barbara says that’s what they’re already doing: “fighting the good fight.” Gah, please stop saying “the good fight” on The Good Fight. It sounds cheesy.

Diane excuses herself from the meeting and runs into Pastor Jeremiah (blast from the past!) in the hall. I can’t remember if I’m supposed to like Jeremiah or his son Isaiah or both of them or neither or what because the last time they appeared on the show was The Debate, an episode which I (and others, I’m sure) have tried to block from memory. I think there was a thread about Jeremiah, or was it Isaiah, being more motivated by politics than social good? (I think it was Jeremiah, because that’s a plot point in season 2 as well.)

Jeremiah and Diane get along well, apparently (I don’t believe we’ve seen them share a scene, but I can believe this), and now Reddick isn’t so reluctant to let Diane in on the conversation. Pastor Jeremiah has an issue. Now, Reddick only wants to talk to Diane.

This gives Barbara and Adrian a chance to talk. “He’s here for two weeks and he’s gone. Patience,” Barbara reminds Adrian.

Jeremiah explains his problem to Diane and Adrian (who I guess is in the meeting now?). He needs to evict someone from a halfway house he runs. Diane says she’ll do it; Adrian says to take “DiPersia” (that’s Jay) and an associate with her in case it turns into something bigger.

Diane selects Maia for this assignment, because of course Diane selects Maia for this assignment. Maia wonders why they’re doing this—is it something they would normally do? Diane explains it’s a favor.

Henry Rindell is in the parking garage, on his way to see Maia. Diane greets him icily. He asks Maia if she has a second. “No. No, I don’t, I’m working,” Maia says (accurately, for once!!!). Diane says she can take a minute.

Maia doesn’t have any interest in talking to her dad. She tells him to stop phoning and not to come to her work, and walks away.

“I’m sorry you’re going through this,” Diane says to Maia. Me too. I suppose it’s necessary to keep going forward with the Rindell family stuff, but I would’ve loved it if this episode (and the rest of the season/series) had shifted away from it and started to focus instead on the aftermath of the scandal’s effects on Maia. Instead of watching her dad try to get in touch (and then attempt suicide), I would’ve liked to have seen Maia and Diane bonding and Maia struggling with the realization she’s cut her parents out of her life after relying on them for everything her whole life.

At the halfway house, Maia asks if Jay carries a gun. He says no, but that he needs one all the time. Kalinda carried a gun. I wonder why Jay doesn’t. More on this!

Diane, Maia, and Jay give the eviction notice, but the tenant throws it away and alleges that Pastor Jeremiah sexually abused him. He says that now he’s going to do something about it, and lawyers up.  

This case hooked me at first, because Jeremiah is a familiar face and it makes me queasy to think about him sexually abusing a minor. But, it’s apparent pretty early on that Jeremiah is innocent here, the resolution to the COTW is easy and unambiguous, and… yeah. The most interesting part of the case is the beginning.

His lawyer is bizarre. He arrives in Diane’s office and begins taking out all of the chocolate bars from her candy dish. He informs her she needs more chocolates and fewer mints. Well, yeah, since you’re stealing all the chocolates.

Weird Lawyer takes a page from the Elsbeth playbook and starts an audio-recording of the conversation. But weird lawyer also seems to be a bad lawyer—and not a bad lawyer in the “easy to underestimate but secretly brilliant” way, just a bad lawyer. He doesn’t know how to make his iPhone record. And he slips up and discusses blackmail on the recording, then has to clarify it’s a joke before abruptly leaving and asking Marissa if she’s tried online dating. Ew.

Weird Lawyer is also bitter about Diane’s “Harvard education”. “I didn’t go to Harvard,” Diane replies. WHERE DID YOU GO TO SCHOOL, THEN?! (My money’s on Yale. Or Columbia. Probably for undergrad, too. Everything about Diane and her friends from school screams Ivy League.)

Marissa adds that she also didn’t go to Harvard. I don’t think Marissa even went to college.

Weird Lawyer keeps pointing out that Diane is supposed to intimidate him because she’s the token white lawyer and she uses fancy lawyer words. And, what, the black lawyers don’t know lawyer words? I don’t know where Weird Lawyer is going with this.

Side note, the end of this scene was released as a sneak peek and I have no idea why; it’s confusing out of context.

WHY DOES WEIRD LAWYER WANT MARISSA TO GO ON EHARMONY? Should I change his name to Creepy Lawyer?

Lucca and Colin go to the art gallery. The artist whose work is on display is a favorite of Robert King’s, if I recall correctly. I see the painting that Courtney gave to Eli last year hanging on the wall. I’m amazed I can recognize that painting. I am also amazed that I remember Courtney’s name.

Lucca arrives and asks why there aren’t eight people there. Colin says it’s because she’s late. Lucca just wants to know where the bathroom is (so Colin can go down on her). They kiss in the middle of the art gallery, but they’re interrupted by… Colin’s mother.

Colin seems confused to see his mom, but is he really? Did he just happen to insist on seeing the same show with Lucca that his mom was going to be at? I don’t know what I’m supposed to believe here. He introduces Lucca as his colleague, but, I mean, they were just making out…

Colin seems to have forgotten Lucca’s last name. Is this stress or bad writing? Obviously Colin knows Lucca’s last name, if for no other reason than that they’re always going up against each other in court and they always use last names there.

Colin’s mom is very chatty. Very, very, very chatty. She’s also the kind of liberal the Kings love to make fun of (reminiscent of Diane’s friends from 5x04).

Colin’s mom’s lawyer, who is with her at the art gallery because reasons (no, like, this is not explained even when Colin calls attention to how strange it is), is the rapping white lawyer from a few episodes back.

Suddenly Rapping Lawyer (only on this show would there be two characters in an episode I’d want to nickname Weird Lawyer) begins to talk politics. “Oh my God, this country. What happened?” Colin’s mom wonders. She proceeds to involve Lucca in the conversation awkwardly, and just as quickly invites Lucca to Colin’s 32nd birthday party the next night.

Lucca didn’t know. But she agrees to go to the party, just to fuck with Colin. She plays nice with Colin’s mom, which leads to Francesca taking her aside and asking, “Did you see what Trump said about African Americans?” Cringe.

In the conference room, Maia’s the only lawyer who’s willing to flat-out ask Jeremiah if he had sex with the tenant. He says he didn’t.

Adrian doesn’t want to take the case. He doesn’t believe Jeremiah, and he’s worried that more young men will come forward once one does. He doesn’t want the firm associated with that kind of a scandal. Reddick doesn’t agree, so he demands a full partnership vote on the leadership of the firm. This seems like a strange catalyst. It’s hard to care—at all, really—about this when Reddick is a new character, we’ve spent several episodes with Adrian and Barbara (hey, where is Barbara in this conversation?), this plot went from zero to sixty in a second (Stern had appeared in two episodes and been mentioned in more before he declared he was going to start his own firm to hurt LG), and his argument in this scene isn’t the most compelling one. Are you sure you want to kick this fight into high gear over defending an alleged pedophile, likely to the detriment of your entire firm?

“You’ve driven [the firm] to the ground, and in this day and age, we can’t afford to let it drift,” Reddick argues. Again: it’s hard to care. I assume he means to the ground/can’t afford ethically, not financially. But you’d have to be an ideological purist to believe Adrian’s only goal is success, success, success. I guess that’s what Reddick is. It’s easy to be critical when you’re not actually the one in charge.

Adrian calls it a betrayal and says he still honors everything Reddick’s done in the past. He can go make inspirational speeches and bask in the applause, but “as far as the future’s concerned, you’ve gotta let us take it from here, Carl.”

Carl won’t back down. Yet again: I don’t care. I’ve seen this before, with Stern, and it was done better the first time, so why should I care this time?

Reddick tries to line up votes. He goes to Diane (HA! Like Diane would vote for him after Adrian was the only one to offer to take her in?) and talks to her about what it’s like to “have a firm that bears your name that lost your mission.” Well, that’s accurate, but it’s not enough of a reason to vote for Reddick. If he’s that unhappy, he could just take his name off of the firm. (Like Stern did.)

He talks to Barbara next. “We once stood for something important, Barbara. And the only thing we stand for now is making money, and as far as I’m concerned, that means we stand for nothing.” Ok? This is the point I’ve been waiting for Barbara to make for weeks, but… I wanted to hear a more nuanced version of it, one that had more to do with how much profit they sought and company culture. You’re a private law firm. Go found a non-profit if you don’t want to care about profit. The solution here seems quite simple.

Also, Barbara is a managing partner. Is her role not also up for a vote?

“Adrian will have his input, but he’s the head, and you’re the heart, as far as I’m concerned,” Reddick explains. What? If the show wants to get into this idea, perhaps they could do so by giving Barbara more screentime, not by introducing Stern 2.0 so we can hear about but not see firm issues.

Reddick also wants Jay to look into the vote count for him. Why would Reddick expect loyalty from Jay?

Jay goes directly to Adrian and asks how “accurate” he should be in his report to Reddick. So much suspense. Will the special guest star or the series regular prevail in this retread of a TGW plot we’ve seen several times before? I’m on the edge of my seat.

(Elsbeth/grand jury twists and turns are usually exciting to see, even when they get repetitive. Office politics… not as much.)

Weird Lawyer has an office that makes Ryan Alprin’s storefront look nice. “You’re not Marissa. Where is Marissa?” Weird Lawyer, who I really should call Creepy Lawyer, demands. You’re awfully fixated on a 24 year old, aren’t you?

Creepy Lawyer greets Maia by saying “pretty red hair” and mentioning that he had a dog with red hair. See? Creepy Lawyer.

He is finishing up a round of Candy Crush—on a computer, not on his phone. Whatever.

Again, Creepy Lawyer mentions that the lawyers he’s dealing with are white. Again, I am not sure what this means. There’s not a jury involved…

Creepy Lawyer has security footage that shows Jeremiah going into the tenant’s room and leaving half an hour later. He makes crude noises and Diane and Maia leave. Ugh.

Jeremiah explains it was a drug test he administered based on a tip.

Jay realizes pretty quickly a whole hour of footage is missing from the tape. He and Marissa talk it over, and Marissa yet again realizes something important: the tenant has a FitBit. How Marissa can tell that’s a FitBit and not a watch is beyond me, but cool.

“I used to think they were stupid, but now I have one,” Marissa says of FitBits. This is such a Marissa thing to need to add to a conversation.

Anyway, the FitBit can show that Jeremiah’s heartrate was decreasing while Paul (the tenant)’s heartrate was increasing, so they weren’t having sex.

Amy (yay, Amy!) appears at Maia’s office because she’s worried. Maia explains she’s been screening her calls (I don’t understand; does she not have people programmed into her contacts?). Amy says Henry phoned home (they have a landline?!) three times, and when she finally picked up, Henry thanked her “for being so good to [Maia]” while crying. “It sounded like goodbye,” Amy explains. Maia phones her dad, but Henry doesn’t pick up.

Maia immediately leaves the office. Cut to Henry, listening to depressing music and surveying his office for what he intends to be the last time. He finally picks up the phone, but doesn’t say anything to Maia. She says she’s on her way and asks him not to hang up, but he does.

God, this is hard to watch. I may not be all that invested in Maia and especially not in Henry, but that doesn’t make it any easier to see.

Henry tries to hang himself in the barn, but ends up falling instead. “Ouch,” he says after he hits the ground. I like the dark humor.

At Colin’s party, Lucca meets Colin’s dad. He, too, can only seem to make conversation if it’s about Trump. I hope this is not actually how people behave. “Oh, hey, you’re black! I need to let you know I am a liberal too!” Ugh.

Colin’s dad is also quite obviously screwing his secretary.

Lucca says it’s nice to meet Colin’s dad (whom she calls by the same last name as Colin’s mom—intentionally? Colin has a different last name than both of his parents, if Lucca’s calling Colin’s dad by the right last name). He responds, “The Root is a great online magazine,” because he just is so excited that Lucca is black that his mind can’t think about anything other than the color of her skin!

Lucca is amused by Colin’s family. Francesca arrives to ask Lucca to settle a debate for her. Surprise—Lucca’s asked to provide the black perspective (because, of course, all black people think the same way) in (what else?) a political conversation about how black people liked Bernie.

“I don’t really have an opinion,” Lucca says, trying to get out of it.

“Do you know Jay-Z?” One of Francesca’s friends asks Lucca. I’m honestly not sure if she’s asking Lucca if she’s heard of Jay-Z or asking Lucca if she knows him personally.

Lucca excuses herself to get a drink. “Oh, she’s wonderful!” Francesca exclaims. “If you don’t marry her, I will.” That escalated quickly.

Maia and Amy run around the Rindell home looking for Henry. Instead, they find his suicide note and his watch. They see a light in the barn and run towards it. They also see a note Henry left for Maia. It tells her to phone the police so she doesn’t have to see what he’s done. Maia responds by running into the barn.

Henry’s still alive, and Amy’s already phoning for an ambulance. Henry asks Maia to clean up after him—his bail will be revoked if it looks like he tried to commit suicide. Maia does as he asks.

Rapping Lawyer pops up to discuss rap with Lucca. “I dunno, Clarence,” she replies instead of answering him. He then congratulates her and says it’ll look great (for her firm, apparently) to have her on Colin’s arm as he runs for office. This is news to Lucca, though it makes sense—that’s why he’s been working as an AUSA. “It’s a stepping stone to office. So are you,” Clarence says bluntly. Why?! Why would he say this?! “The hot black girlfriend? It’s a demographic dream,” he continues.

Lucca finishes her drink and leaves abruptly for a “work emergency.” She says she’s already called a Lyft. (So Lucca uses Lyft over Uber?)

Jax brings Lenore to the hospital to see Henry. This upsets Maia. And I get it. But Jax is also Henry’s brother; it makes sense for Jax to be there… (not with Lenore, but still!)

Maia demands, again, that Lenore end it with Jax. Have I ever cared so little about a subplot?!

Maia, to prove her point, reads Henry’s suicide note to Lenore. It’s sad. Again, it would be sadder if Henry and Lenore felt more like people and less like soap opera villains.

Last minute campaigning happens. I do not care.

Lenore breaks up with Jax. I care in that I will be thrilled if this plot finally ends.

Creepy Lawyer has a new strategy: mention that the client can identify a birthmark on “the good pastor’s dick.” Didn’t someone once try this strategy on Peter Florrick? And Alicia just burst out laughing?

Jeremiah maintains that he’s innocent, but he will not disrobe. Naturally, this makes him look guilty. Jeremiah doesn’t care.

Jeremiah asks Adrian if he believes him. “I have been around too long to know better than to expect anything from my heroes other than feet of clay,” Adrian says. (This is a confusing sentence that I think I transcribed correctly.)

Marissa finds something! Paul, the tenant, was in contact with the lawyer before he said he was going to lawyer up! It’s a scheme!

So Marissa and Jay investigate Creepy Lawyer’s past cases and find out he’s being paid to bring this suit so some political group can take down a well-respected black pastor. Isn’t that convenient? It’s all a ploy and they uncover it and it just goes away!

Reddick, Adrian, and Diane all laugh as Creepy Lawyer leaves, and for once, the victory isn’t undercut. (The partnership vote is still on, though.)

Colin waits for Lucca in the garage of RBK. She breaks up with him, saying they both knew it wasn’t serious. “I’m not sure what you’re looking for, but I’m not her. I’m not an accessory, I’m not a… trophy. I’m sure as hell not a wife,” Lucca explains. “And I never treated you that way,” Colin says. Sure. But he’s still on his family’s path, no? He’s working they job they want him to work, living in the house they pay for, showing up for the parties they throw in his honor…

Oooh now I want a Colin and Maia scene. I feel like they have a lot in common. Well, at least, they’re both adults who grew up ridiculously wealthy and are questioning how much they still want to (or can) rely on their parents.

Colin leaves and Lucca gets into her car. She begins to cry. Say, wouldn’t it be nice if Lucca had a best friend she could call? Someone who knew exactly what it was like to be viewed as arm candy for a politician? If only there were someone like that in the universe of this show…

(I don’t actually want Alicia to come back for this but, again: it’s one of those things where it would make so much sense to show Alicia that her absence is glaring. Alicia’s absence doesn’t take away from this moment for Lucca—in fact, this is probably the best moment of the episode (it’s certainly the one I cared about the most) and Alicia wouldn’t be there in the immediate aftermath even if she were on the show—but it’s hard not to see the parallel.)

To go back to Lucca: I hope we get more on this. I understand why Lucca wouldn’t want any part of the political act. That’s not who she is. She is outspoken and does what she pleases, and she’s arranged her life so she can continue to have that freedom. She doesn’t even want a long-term relationship (at this point, possibly ever), certainly not one in the public eye. And certainly not one that forces her to play Good Wife Who Is Also Representative of All Black People. She was just starting to open up to someone, and now… this. She opened up, and she got hurt. She would rather abruptly cut off a relationship than risk losing the life she’s worked to build for herself, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

Partnership vote happens. Julius is still around, apparently just so he can be in this totally anti-climactic vote that ends up being a tie anyway. (And it’s a mistake to have Julius there for another reason: Julius is so crucial—and so delightful!—in the vote against Bond that his presence here just reminds me of how much better that plot was.) It’s 11-12, in favor of Reddick. Adrian, instead of noting that someone didn’t vote, asks to have the room polled.

And then Barbara swoops in to save the day! She didn’t vote but now she wants to now. Wow, what a twist. I’m glad Barbara gets to make the big speech, but I still… don’t care about this drama.

“Carl, you said this was a battle between the firm’s heart and its head. But it’s not. It’s about the past or the future. Your past glories have a lot to teach us, but this… this is now. The fights are now, and Adrian knows how to fight them. I vote for Adrian.” Barbara says. Again with the fighting talk. This episode is not very subtle, nor is it exciting. That’s the big twist? Barbara didn’t vote but now she’s going to vote? I don’t care about Reddick losing—it’s not like he’s Derrick Bond with an evil scheme episodes in the making to take over. And, because I’m not invested in Reddick the antagonist enough, I don’t care about watching Adrian win.

AND, even though I do care about Adrian and Barbara’s partnership, as I said earlier, the best way to explore it isn’t to bring in Reddick for a subplot but rather to, you know, explore their partnership.

Reddick explains that the fights now aren’t any different and then leaves. Does this mean he’s gone? I don’t know and I don’t care. How can I care about a potential upset to the firm’s mode of operating when I haven’t even gotten a chance to see how the firm operates?

Adrian and Barbara have their Will and Diane moment: Adrian brings a bottle of wine and two glasses into Barbara’s office. “To idealism,” Adrian says. “To pragmatism,” Barbara replies. They drink and look at their firm. Awww. I like this ending. (And I love Barbara even more for talking about pragmatism.)

(I wish this ending were the conclusion to a better plot. Specifically, a plot that featured Barbara more heavily instead of one that involved characters speaking in clichés without ever explaining what they meant. Barbara is the heart to Adrian’s head? Then show us that. Or show us why it’s wrong—it’s Barbara who toasts to pragmatism, after all. Or show us why it’s wrong to think of it as binary, how Barbara is the one who’s more passionate about the firm’s culture, but she’s also a pragmatist, and Adrian comes up with strategic plans but also plays a huge role in setting the tone for the firm. And do the same with past and future: explain how times have changed, and how they haven’t. ALL of these people are well-versed in these issues. They could have a well-reasoned discussion about this; they are all more than capable of citing specific examples and studies and strategies.)

(I wrote “I don’t care” a lot in this recap. This is a big problem. There is no reason I shouldn’t be invested in these characters. They are well-drawn (with the exception of Henry and Lenore Rindell) and I want to know even more about them. That I can pinpoint exactly why I don’t care, and exactly what I’d change so that I would care, worries me. These are not new complaints. Office politics (and/or conspiracies) driving plot when there’s more than enough character stuff to work with is something that I complained about pretty much every week in the later seasons of TGW. Focus. On. The. Characters. Captivating plots will come naturally out of solid character development.)

[insecure-hbo-the-recaps]

hella shook

Previously: Issa wanted to get a roster going. Molly for some reason didn’t know what it was about Sterling K Brown. Dro’s marriage was open. Lawrence was used as a prop for a racist threesome. He lied about it. Issa and Daniel made amends.

Issa’s in traffic in her fairly new model car I might add. She is on her phone at every red light and doesn’t notice that she’s on E. She’s wearing a black and white cookie coat, look at this:

Ees! Jesus. She stops at exactly 9:45 cents because she’s poor. She finally makes it to her destination, serving up a “special delivery, sir” for Daniel. They awkwardly joke about how silly she’s being and he opens the door with a smug smile. They’re very attuned and cute and happy and whatnot.

Hey! They got honeycomb towers in LA too, apparently. Unless this is a scene where Molly is skyping with Quintin in Chicago, which the immediate shot of an L lets me know it is. See?

God I fucking love my city. That’s the green line by the way. (If you’re not familiar with Chicago, this is what I mean by “honeycomb towers”:)

They’re downtown near State and Kinzie, where I once went out with a professor from Boston who I thought looked like Mark Zuckerberg. (Public House is the bar there.) We watched the world series where the red sox won that year and it had been such a fun date, I was really disappointed when I never heard from him again. Oh well - in hindsight whatever I wore is probably not something I would wear now.

Molly is actually in Chicago this time, and Quintin is helping her keep the associates straight. He’s wearing a tan vest and Malcolm X glasses and is it this show or somewhere else where they make jokes about a preacher body? Because good grief if I don’t think of an old timey Civil Rights Movement era preacher every time I see him, lol. Molly points out there’s a lot of black people at this office, and Quintin says he doesn’t understand how she could work in the LA office; it reminds him of why he went to Howard.

Quintin asks whether Molly has said anything about her pay inequality but Molly hasn’t. He asks why she isn’t considering leaving, because their firm is not the only fish in the sea. Obviously this has never occurred to Molly. It’s like she gets blinders on about certain things she thinks are acceptable or that she should want or be doing, and is incapable of considering any options outside of that. Apparently Molly is stuck in a sunken cost fallacy, which means you end up sticking out a situation that has long since expired just because you’ve already invested so much time into it already. Quintin encouages her to consider her options. Oh, there’s the “pastor’s body” joke. He really does look like a pastor.

Back in LA, Issa is getting dressed while Daniel is still in bed watching Due North. He asks whether she has plans the next night, but Issa demurs, unsure of his intentions. Daniel’s body is insane.

Elsewhere, Lawrence is on a run with his coworkers, the blonde and Arpana. He won’t be at work the next day because he has jury duty. Another coworker shows up and we get the exposition that they are training for a marathon. I know people hang out with their coworkers like this but I am antisocial and weird so I never do and never have, which sucks. This is how most people make friends as adults.

Molly is back home now. At her apartment, she and Issa are preparing floral arrangements for Molly’s parents’ vow renewal. Issa can’t make it because she has a “work retreat.” Daniel texts, and off the look on Issa’s face, Molly inquires about it. Issa tries to play it off, but Molly knows this is not nothing. “Daniel and I have history, but we always bounce back.” Molly is skeptical that either of them can do this without catching feelings, but Issa insists none of that is on her agenda right now: she has Daniel, “Neighbor Bae,” and a Latino man she is going out with that night.

Meanwhile, at jury duty, Lawrence gets a text from Derek inviting him to his birthday party. Lawrence hesitates, assuming Issa will be there, but agrees to go. Bored, he scrolls through his facebook and happens across a photo from the night of the Kiss and Grind party; apparently Kelli’s pic accidentallycaught Issa smiling and chatting with Daniel in the background.

Now that is a stroke of bad luck. Lawrence is so distracted by this news he barely hears them call him for briefing.

Back at the We Got Y'all offices, the supervisor is expositing that they have a director position open. Naturally the overeager white dude thinks this is his time to shine. They are going to be having a retreat Saturday morning and wants everyone to partner up. Issa looks over at Frieda who awkwardly looks away. Issa decides to brush it off, but when she whispers a joke and Frieda continues to look uncomfortable, the smile slides off Issa’s face.

She follows Frieda to the breakroom, asking to talk. Frieda tensely explains that she isn’t comfortable with what’s happening at the school, but Issa still doesn’t see a problem. This was around the time I started to think Issa was in the wrong the first time I saw this season… not because Issa is siding with bigotry but because she doesn’t know better than to talk frankly about racism with whites in the workplace. That fact that Issa was so clueless as to be straightforward with a Clueless White Person on the thing that they fear most - an issue concerning race where they may be even indirectly accused of being a GASP racist - just sort of underlined for me that she was compounding a wrong instead of fixing it. “It must be nice to have the privilege to choose to be upset over this,” Issa says, and the fact that she doesn’t back down lets Frieda get the moral high ground.

Inglewood. Molly is at her parents’ place unloading flowers for the renewal. Dro is her childhood next door neighbor and he is there to a.) celebrate Molly’s parent’s marriage and b.) smooth things over about basically asking her to take part in his open marriage. He asks if she never thought of him like that; “I mean yeah maybe for a minute when you had your colored contacts on,” Molly says. Light skints aren’t still in style anymore are they? Exoticals for men is always kind of a weird area, I think.

Molly says she’s thought about it, but the marriage thing “is just not how” she sees her life. Dro is cool with that and they agree to stay friends, ribbing each other like only childhood friends can do.

Jury Duty. There’s black woman who answers a question about “bias against police” by standing up to reveal her Black Lives Matter t-shirt that I’m unclear whether or not she meant it or just wanted to get out of jury duty. “Not buying it,” the judge says, but the juror is dismissed. Lawrence is scrolling through Daniel’s gram while all this happens.

Back at Molly’s, her mom is saying something about the dollar store champagne flutes she bought, and what is with moms and dollar stores? My momma loves her some dollar store home goods. They lightly push Molly, as you do your children, about when she’s getting married. Mom wants to know what’s the hold up but Dad knows Molly isn’t going to settle. Apparently Molly has a brother, or two brothers, or a gay brother, I’m unclear. I think one of them is famous for something or other though.

Date night. Issa shows up at a low lit ambient bar looking for Mexican bae. “Come through, Tinder,” she says when she spots him. She’s wearing a tight blue dress and a TWA. Mexican bae seems like he’s in his late 30s. Issa’s inner monologue horndogs about horchata. Bruh, rumchata is delicious. I haven’t managed to buy it myself yet because that shit costs like 20$ but it tastes just like Christmas. And like, really good bread pudding. I should try to buy it at least for the holidays. Anyway, Issa is fantasizing about boning him right on the bar.

We know he’s a good guy because he says isn’t a martini guy and they joke about comics. I can’t with how comic book lore has taken over American entertainment. I liked the Tobey Maguire Spider Mans but now there’s like 18 in-universe comic book shows on TV and like four comic book movies at any given time… I honestly thought the comic book thing would have faded a long time ago by now and we’d be back to some other mythical fan lore like angels and ghosts again. (Zombie lore is still popular, and I think vampire lore is still hanging ten, so we need to go to demons or the undead or something.) They eventually move to another table, signifying that the date has lasted a few hours. The waiter brings by the check and Issa does the fake purse grab. You know, I used to adamantly refuse to do that (and the one time I was *asked* to split was by a nerdy black dude I met in a hipster dive who approached me by asking if I was latina - I must emphasize that I do not look latina whatsoever), like even pretend like I was going to pay. Now, I just offer to split. I usually never have to still, which is good, but also, I’m not poor anymore either so. My thing now is taking care to note that the waitress puts the check on the guy’s side instead of in the middle - that’s when I know the universe wants me to feel good about myself.

Anyway, they have had a good night and Issa is clearly thinking about asking him back to her place. But, we know he’s a Good Guy because he says he can’t, “but this is an excuse for us to do this again!”

Saturday morning work retreat. There’s a generic snack bar set up. Issa is texting with Daniel, after canceling on him because of her date the previous night. Anyway the work team does a boring team building exercise so that the Clueless White People can make Clueless White People assumptions about the kind of trouble kids might be having at home. Issa and Frieda take a few passive aggressive jabs at each other and when it’s time to pair up Frieda quickly finds someone else, leaving Issa stuck with Sujata Day. I don’t know if she’s supposed to be Indian in this one.

Vow Renewal. Apparently Molly decided to invite Sterling K Brown who is wearing a crazy colorful suit like only a person whose body has been altered to look good in Hollywood could do:

Molly’s wig actually does look good, don’t mind the screenshot. Dro and his parents show up (his dad is latino, his mom is ambiguous brown). Dro hangs around as his parents walk off and Sterling K Brown possessively wraps an arm around Molly, who introduces them. Just so you know that this is going on:

Do y'all take notice of stuff like this or no? Men, even men who are supposedly friends with each other, I find pull rank like this in front of women all the time. I was seeing a guy and one night we were hanging out with his roommate. They went outside to smoke and I tagged along. My dude and I were sharing his cigarette (I don’t smoke but I find this sort of thing cute) and the other guy offered me his. My dude didn’t think anything of it, but it’s little shit like that that always feels like to me men are playing ego games with each other and/or always prepared to slide in the DMs of someone else’s girl. (I also tend to think everyone is hitting on me, so that bias tends to reinterpret things.) But, it’s the subtlety. And I think if more people paid attention they’d notice things like this more often. At any rate, Sterling K Brown is clearly glad to be there with Molly and possibly senses that Dro is a threat. They all play polite and it’s only mildly awkward.

At a bar across town, Lawrence is having drinks with Derek and grilling him for information about Issa and Daniel. Ha. That’s way more straightforward than he usually is when he talks to Chad. Derek says that after Tasha, he and Tiffany had to stop discussing them because they always took sides. Lawrence is preoccupied and insecure about Issa seeing Daniel now… maybe she had been seeing him the entire time? Derek says Issa is too dorky to be sneaky. “That’s exactly why you wouldn’t expect it,” Lawrence says. He clearly is reiminaging their entire relationship and second guessing what he thought it was.

“Honestly… this ain’t all on Issa,” Derek says. “You spent two years unemployed, not doing shit, letting your woman take care of you. Kinda left the door open.” Lawrence does that thing of rotating his jaw and accepts this silently. He tries to say it doesn’t justify cheating, but Derek says he understands why she would be attracted to someone who could make things happen.

Vow renewal. Molly’s brother or whatever asks “is that you?” and HA! Haven’t heard that in ages. “So it’s a pity date?” he asks. Molly lists off his positive qualities and how she wants to give it a shot. Her brother says just because she dates a good guy that doesn’t translate into a relationship. Her brother (no, her brother’s best friend) apparently is married to a stripper that trapped him. He tells Molly if she isn’t feeling him she shouldn’t date him. And because Molly has no understanding of what she wants out of a relationship or from men generally, this is the point where she no longer understands if she should be on a date with Sterling K Brown. He doesn’t deserve this.

Bathroom. Issa calls her brother to check whether or not she might be in the wrong with the situation with Frieda. Check out this gloriously dressed fashion forward ass nigga:

Issa’s brother doesn’t tell her what she wants to hear so she hangs up in his face. To make herself feel better, she responds to a random sext from Neighbor Bae, sending back a nude before she gets busted by Mrs. Frizzle. Issa, at least go into the stall.

Molly is partially hosting this party, so she goes to greet a couple of great aunts. As nosy older black women, they immediately start inquiring about the delicious slice of man she chose to parade around this family event. Which… if you’re not sure if you want to date a guy, don’t fucking bring him to a parent-centered family event maybe. The aunts start talking about how amazing it is that Molly’s parent’s marriage lasted 35 years “after what he put my sister through.” This is news to Molly.

Issa is texting at a red light when she misses it turn green. A “Potential Bae” sends her a dick pic and she rear ends the car in front of her. This is where I stopped being on Issa’s team. No woman, no self possessed black woman, has any business being so distracted by dick she would open herself up to litigation, the loss of transportation, and unspecified auto repair. Like, I can no longer abide this level of thirst. This was when Issa went too far. Also, I spared you a screenshot of the dick pic.

Back that the renewal, Molly is grilling her brother about the state of her parents’ marriage. It turns out that Dad cheated on Mom and “they worked through it.” Molly seems almost more offended that her mom put up with it than her dad cheated at all. And this is the part where Yvonne Orji had to do an emotional scene. And it was so bad it threatened to diminish my enjoyment of the rest of the series so what you need to know is: 1. the acting here is really really bad, so bad I don’t know how they didn’t insist on more takes and/or cut away often enough so that you didn’t notice how bad it was and b. Molly can’t deal with the reality that there is no such thing as a fairy tale relationship. Not all relationships have cheating but a fuckton of them do, so everyone needs to just chill. Also, remind me at a later date to tell you about how I recently found out a guy I had been seeing was married and his wife had their first kid earlier this year. It was fucking horrid. (This is not an endorsement from the “All Men Cheat” school of logic as I, personally, have never been cheated on in a relationship.)

Sterling K Brown tries to console Molly but she stomps away, leaving Dro to chase after her. Bitch move. Molly’s being an asshole all around. Bitch, how are you whining about relationships when you left your fucking date at a party at your parents’ house to leave with another dude? Molly is way out of line here, and her behavior deserves no sympathy at all.

Issa calls Daniel to let him know she can’t make it tonight because she got into a car accident. He offers to pick her up. She tries to beg off but he insists, and his caring and eagerness to help is good to see. One of the worst things about being an introverted holier than thou asshole is that whenever I need help, it always hits me really hard that I really have no one to call.

Meanwhile, this is Lawrence’s Saturday night:

GOD those are the worst, lol. He sits there ruminating for awhile and finally defriends. “I don’t wanna see this shit,” Lawrence thinks.

Dro is driving Molly home. So… she just gone leave her car (and her date) in the interests of her thirst or what? Because I’m not buying that she’s so distraught she just needed to get home despite the common decency of leaving on no notice like that. You wanted to provoke Dro’s dick and we all know it. No smoothing over on this ridiculous behavior, Molly. She continues being all “distraught,” and while I have to offer points for the damsel and distress routine in principle, I believe in polite society more, so be thirsty on your own time, not when it inconveniences or hurts someone else. Molly laments how she spends all her time trying to find someone like her dad only to find out their marriage is bullshit. I suppose if I had grown up in a married two parent household it would come as news to me, too, that parents can be just as ain’t shit as anyone else. Still. I find this childish. Dro lends a sympathetic ear and Molly eats it up.

Daniel shows up to pick up Issa and gives her a hug in reassurance since she’s just been in a car accident. Instead of abiding this silently where even if she doesn’t want it she can use it to her advantage at a later date, Issa decides to be clear that Daniel knows they are not dating only each other and are both seeing other people. Issa isn’t sure if she was as up front about that as she should have been the last time they slept together. Daniel reacts disappointedly in a way that telegraphs he did not know that was what they were doing. On the other hand, I feel like men pull this shit a lot and maybe it was good for him to know he isn’t the only fish in her pond. Idk. On this issue I have erred toward casual probably more often than I should have, to regretful effects, so for me the jury is out on that.

Dro walks Molly to her door and her building is so lovely. Oh, it turns out Dro drove Molly’s car home. That kinda makes it even more shitty that she left Sterling K Brown? When Dro goes to leave, because we must be overtly aware of the stupid and ridiculous choices they make, she pulls him back and kisses him. Then we cut to them boning a second later. Excellent sex scene. Extremely poor choice.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

This case will be going to the grand jury

Okay

So what a grand jury does is determine via a jury panel of 12 or the local dictated amount, sometimes it is different -- in a closed private setting, if there is enough evidence for a probable cause to arrest the people for the crimes

Now I am told by Tree that this man whom was murdered was kidnapping for human trafficking and that is why he was killed.

Now I'm all about being anti racial crimes and modern lynching due to skin color

However SMS will show what he had done just hours before to these men. Where they all had been and what led up to the death of this man.

This is in February. I said and I said we would kill human traffickers.

This is a result of that statement

I wish it wasn't a black man. I do. I love black people all day long but we can't control what they do or do not do.

Due to the racial profiling and the claims that black are arrested unfairly we do have a higher rate of white people to do these killings.

This is to protect black people.

Killing one black kidnapper saves thousands and millions of African Kings, Queens, Princesses and Princes that will trust a black man to not kidnap them.

So I hope you do understand and I hope that the truth is shown and the truth is understood and justice is preserved in the grand jury

Had it been a group of black men killing one black guy it would been looked over as a gang thing. And ee don't want that either

So this video was purposely leaked to allow us to explain the choice of skin color that we use -- predominantly white (light) to protect Mexicans (Latino, Hispanic, Spanish) and African Americans

Because of white privilege.

It was expected and yet not hoped that this gossip would have happened. It shows the extreme damage in our communities.

And while this entire article is hurtful (and untrue) it does represent what police do.

I couldn't read all the words, they were so painful. Here we are trying all we can to protect innocent African-American and Latinx and still the screaming of indecency is arisen.

And yet we all still see the point. The Civil War was so long gone, no one who fought in it is still living. Yet daily it is still fought.

While y'all are not following instinct extremely close...

Y'all do recognize he was murdered ... He was murdered jogging ... And he was murdered for who he was ... But he was simply not just black. He was also a human trafficker.

Yes, my friends and my foes, black human traffic, too. Just like they deal drugs. Its "good" money meaning it is a lot.

I don't think I've called out a black person yet and this is the first. Just because I hadn't said didn't mean it ain't true

I've called out white people only. One girl and many men. Yet the Chinese and Asians have been attacked but I hadn't singled out one single Asian. Only white men (at that time it had began in Connecticut)

Yes yes yes Mexicans, Blacks, Whites, Native Americans they all human traffic

Native Americans are notorious for human trafficking. Y'all did not know that but they are. Agent Orange is 39% Native American. "Well they did it to us"

So you know it fucking hurts and you don't do it to other people, ass holes. But no. It makes them feel justified and right. They're not. They're shameful.

So this article is full of gossip and untrue words strung together to create bull shit.

I wish it was 3 innocent and good black man on one white kidnapper.... However the facts remain it was one African American Kidnapper that used people for humam trafficking

I am incorrect -- I have called out two African American Women for human trafficking --- Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King.

But this is the first male.

I also posted a video of actors that were all 100% human trafficking. And some were African American.

Now im going to tell you about Zulululu because of the high deaths of African Americans in this COVID crisis

Zulululu kill humans and then they take over their bodies. Okay.

So Zulululu are racist and ass holes. They are rapists. They have no respect for women. They male chauvinist pigs. They're disgusting.

So unfortunately I do believe that the Zulululu (and the other 3 planets as well) have already killed these Africans and then took over their bodies.

They did it to Michael Jackson. Alex Laughlin when he was Gaberial. Matt Hagan was my twin brother and he's been taken over by the alien in the film "White Boy Rick" that was Rick. He killed himself in jail to kill my brother to take over his body...

It makes me very sad. I want to cry.

Denise was killed and taken over by an alien. So the Zulululu uses my aunt's actual human body. Same with Nathaniel.

So it is very horrific.

So this huge amount of African Americans dying... Im sorry y'all but they ain't African Americans, baby. They ain't. Baby. They been dead a long time. And I am so sorry, i truly am.

That is why we have DNA4U. It dignifies your actual child or mom or aunt or uncle as alien or not. As human souls or some alien mouth breathing fool.

It is why all human bodies have COVID-19.

Because if you, my sista, get killed by an alien then the antibody "melts" caused by the alien soul and baby girl you ain't gotta be dead watching your body walk around no more. It's gonna die. And it's gonna die bad and it's gonna suffer. And you getta watch that alien panic.

So as soon as they alien soul enters the COVID activation occurs, your soul removing the antibody with you. Or thinking the body keeps it then the alien melts it. However you wanna look at it. IDC. However it occurs, idc. However its mutated in each individual idc. The mother fuckers ain't doing this shit no more.

So baby. Yeah. Y'all African American do have a 29% higher rate of Alien body take overs than the rest of the races. Next is Asian. Then Scottish, German, French, Polish, Swedish then general White from Europe.

Unfortunately they been trying to find me. Not knowing where i will pop up next, they infiltrate places I've been and have made a good life for myself.

Egypt, Outer Mongolia, Scottland as Queen Anne in the 1600s, I've been Joan of Arc, Cleopatra y'all know... So fucking many!

And they keep trying to find me to mate with me. But I can't. I can only produce children with my soulmate. Just like every other single human. Just like DNA4U proves.

Just like Zulululu can't even have children.

I can only mate with my soulmate

And it fucking kills me because they killed zillions and more than zillion of Chinese babies looking for me. And I never was born in China again. Because it was too dangerous.

I was never born in Africa again, it was too dangerous.

I was born in Detroit.. I was born in small town Alabama in a trailer park.

I was born in San Francisco. In London. In France. I've lived poor. Rich. Moderate. I've hidden quite successfully.

And yet... They destroy my people even still ...

So enter COVID 19 which is destroying my healthcare workers with PTSD. Because I don't get a chance to explain

Because the aliens keep getting in my way. Alex Laughlin. A fake Brian. Agent Orange. Eric Trump is always breathing down my neck. Denise. Nathaniel.

Its so fucking annoying.

And in my daily fights and struggles, my people are hurting.

So finally, a man with two stumps for legs because he deals with too many aliens for his nurse care, live in, and his soulmate is in jail for weed trafficking. I've known him off and on for 20 years. He posts a real human that is upset. I can see shes human. I just wanna hug her and take away all her pain. And Joey he says he just wants one miracle. He got it.

Finally the air cleared and I was able to break out and activate the healthcare substitute website and the mental health website especially for nurses and doctors to give them military training on acceptance of death which they get paid to learn. To encourage them to keep on trying. Keep reading, keep watching videos and keep caring about themselves and their mental health care.

For some it won't work. For some it just won't penetrate their brain. They can't hear it yet, they're not ready. But it will absorb if they let it. Each little particle of information that absorbs into their soul is just like that woman said -- it let's them be that one that is there for them because no one else is.

She's so beautiful. I mean shes pretty. She ain't painful to look at. But her words i just got goose bumps. Her beauty, "i wanna quit, but then they ain't got no one but me"

Girl. Y'all. I tell you. Every day. That's me.

I quit hundreds of times. "I fucking quit!! Fuck y'all!" Two days later I'm back at it. I can't stop.

Its that Orphan in me. It's that Queen in me, that Goddess of Earth.

At any rate. We're gonna stop this shit.

Racism. Its gonna stop.

Unfortunately COVID deaths of African Americans will not stop.

We have tried everything. Tricking a switch. "Okay alien just jump out and let her back in her body because she forgot something in there and she needs to get it" next thing we know its another car wreck and girl is dead and kicked out.

Exorcisms.

The Exorcist. That Horror film. All real.

We have tried it all m

And that is why we are in this horrific mess.

Luckily we got all kinds of shit planned!! Surprises around every corner and we are gonna get this done

We're gonna save Humanity, Ecology and the Earth itself.

We are gonna kill the souls of those from those four planets. Now it's gonna take time and its not gonns be fun.

But i got lawyers for the people that have been beat by cops finally assigned today! Yay!.

More than half of the 18,000 cops that are beating people for no reason have been killed today. Thank God for that and Tree of course and the snipers, Thank you.

And so this man in this article, unfortunately was ordered to die by me.

He was ordered to be killed by white people.

I don't want black men or Latino to be imprisoned for serving justice. White privilege is real.

All four planets for whatever reason decided to torture and bully and pick on African Americans.

Maybe because I'm white now... But i have to be white.. It's too dangerous to be black. Come on.. Yeah I used to black as Hell. But shit, a girl cant even walk down the street without being raped. Black girls are raped 4 times more than white. Asian girls are raped 6 times more often. 6 times! And they been killing most of them!!! So you know you gotta count that like every single Asian girl has been raped at least once.

They don't have it easy y'all! Stop picking on them!!!

Any way So there is a racial thing to the COVID but it's definitely not a human thing that is targeting them.

Y'all. Our African have already been killed and aliens are just walking around in their bodies.

So y'all don't cry no more.

Be mad.

Realize what's going on.

Alright so im telling you our families are dead and murdered.

Solution? Yes there is, in time.

We will ghost them back to life, creating bodies out of thin air for their spirits, their souls that exist.

Okay so i remember Alex Laughlin as Gaberial.... But Gaberial is Hispanic... And Alex looks French. So when the alien does take over it alters the physical characteristics of the original body.... But only slightly...

So some will request a dramatic overhaul of their appearance....

Okay say... Like Denise.... If Denise the real one looks too similar to the alien compound.... And we all hate her... Its simple to change the way she looks so that we don't ever see the old alien Denise when we look at the real Denise.

So she's been gone over 30 years..,

Gaberial 20

So its just like the changes that someone would make while growing up or growing old -- that is the way we look at it.

So i remember Gaberial as he was... And so he will change as he was only about 13 when his body was overtaken... So easy for him to have a new grown up self. Also same as easy to have him as original.

It all depends on the person and who did the alien take over and all that complicated stuff

So they analyze the complicated and we make it simple for compression of the new or old face.

And we allow it a choice and we say it is and it is respected and the person is loved.

Because that is humanity.

Again i apologize for the pain due to racism. The article does spell out the past and current situation especially with cops Here lately.

I was and still am totally with the Eric, "i can't Breathe" movement which ended in murder..

And that is why i am so angry.

But again. Please understand the justification of this killing and the reason we are using white privilege is to protect those that do not have white privilege.

We seize the opportunity. We don't make the opportunity. We use it.

Do please forgive me for doing so. I am only trying to protect the few good ones we have left because we all love you and we need you all safe!

I don't want yall in jail for a second for trying to save the world.

[theliterateape]

Only Lydia Knows

By Paul Teodo & Tom Myers

I have Parkinson’s. Yeah, that’s right. Parkinson’s. No cure, and the kind that comes at you hard and fast. Multiple System Atrophy. I have an over production of the protein alpha-synoclein. What does that mean to you? Nothing, most likely, but to me it means a sentence. A death sentence. It’s coming for me like a freight train, and I have to decide what I’m going do.

If something else doesn’t happen first, It’s going kill me, shake me to death.

Bad metaphor? Well it’s my metaphor bad or not. I’m sixty. Just found out a year ago. My hand was shaking, little twitches. Like when I used to drink. OK, when I drink. Nobody knows. No other docs, friends, family. Nobody. But now you do. The invisible reader. The person I let into my secret, while closing the real people out.

You may ask why. Why? I’ll tell you. Because my wife ain’t a wife anymore, my fiancé dumped me, and my kids have their own lives. And friends? It’d just mess up our friendship. How? When people know you’re sick things change. They realize you have an incurable illness that’ll kill you, they don’t know what to do. I could say “Bill I have Parkinson’s.” He’d get that look. Like, “What the fuck do I do or say now?” I don’t want that look. And I sure as hell don’t want him ducking into the bathroom to Google Parkinson’s. So I keep my mouth shut. I’d rather have that spontaneous happy relationship I have with Bill, than him fucking Googling my disease each time we hang out. It’s cumbersome, slow, muddy, a fucking pain in the ass. I don’t want that.

My doc? I don’t have a one. I am one. But do I have one? A favorite. A primary care doc? No. When the twitches started I did the research. Googled the shit out of this disease that has taken over my body. That’s what I do. I look into things. And what I got, or what’s got me, is Parkinson’s

It’s not hard to diagnose. If you went to medical school. A good one like I did. And can work a computer, which on a good day, I can. And it’s this alpha-synoclein protein shit. It’s not hard.

My type. This alpha shit comes on strong. It’s no creeper or crawler. I made the call about five months ago. Twitches. Tremors. Invisible bugs creeping up and down my legs. My age. Yes, my age. A few clicks on my Mac and there I was.

As I sit at my desk at six-thirty each morning, drinking black coffee (no longer mixed with Chivas Regal) my hand shakes. And each morning I shake a bit more and a bit longer. For some reason the coffee helps. Coffee with Chivas helped better.

Like I said, nobody knows and that’s how its going to stay. Nobody knew about the booze, so I thought, until they knew. You get that? I didn’t think they knew. They fucking knew.

My phone buzzed. I looked at the ID. Rachel. At six-thirty? What the hell does she want?

“Morning.”

“Good morning John. What are you doing?”

What was I doing? It was six-thirty. What does a normal person do at six-thirty? Forgot. (Parkinson’s has me) I’m not normal.. Nice of you to ask Rachel, I’m drinking black coffee without booze trying to get my hands to stop shaking.

“Drinking coffee, reading the paper, enjoying the beautiful morning.” That’s the kind of thing you tell your boss, when you want her to think you’re doing your job.

“I’d like to talk to you.”

The coffee jumped out of the fucking cup. Talk to me? About what? The booze? My shakes? 

“I’m busy.”

“You just said you were drinking coffee, reading the paper.”

That means I’m busy. Leave me the fuck alone!

“OK when?”

“Now. Meet me in my office in fifteen minutes.”

“Sure.” How was that? Perky? Cooperative?

My hand was covered in coffee. My shirt sleeve was stained too. If I held the cup any longer a river of caffeine would cascade down my pants and into my shoes. Exaggeration, but you get the picture. So I hit the john and did my best to not look like a guy with Parkinson’s or a drunk, of which I was both.

“Doc. Spill coffee?” Lydia Smith has worked at the hospital for twenty-five years. She cleaned everything that needed to be cleaned. Today it was the bathroom I was using to prepare to hide one of my diseases from my boss.

“Yeah. You know me. I’m a slob.”

She eyed me. She was one of the ones who I thought didn’t know about the booze. She knew. A look like that told me she knew and she’d looked at me like that about fifty times before. Who was I trying to kid? EVERYBODY.

“Let me.” She dabbed my shirtsleeve with some type of cleaner she carried on her cart and wiped my hands with the white towel that hung from her waist. “That helps.”

I need help. But I ain’t asking. We don’t. Drunks. 'Til it’s so obvious the help turns to life support.

“Thanks,” I said to her, obsessing on Rachel and our talk.

I paced down the hall listening to my heels click on the shiny marble floor. Yeah it’s one of those hospitals. We must have marble. No tile for us. We need to maintain a competitive advantage since one of our docs is a drunk and now has a fatal illness.

I look up. I’m here already. I didn’t think I could walk that fast. And why the hell was I walking that fast?

A glass wall stood before me. ADMINISTRATION. Bold black letters. A shiny silver handle inviting me to give it a yank and enter the sanctum of the judge, jury, and executioner.

No one was there to greet me. It was early. But not for me, Lydia and Rachel. I should leave. Claim confusion. No one there. No one to greet me. I was a physician. Harvard trained. I needed to be greeted. I demanded to be greeted.

“John.” I turned.

“Rachel.” Her scarf. What? Four, five hundred bucks?

“Good to see you.” Her best corporate smile.

Bullshit.

“Good to see you.” We could both sling the bullshit.

“Coffee?” Her eyes moved to my stained sleeve.

I raised it and smiled making sure she saw the evidence of my illnesses. “No thanks. I’ve had mine already.”

“Come in.” She gestured gracefully like a ballerina. I think she was one, once.

My feet no longer clicked on the marble. Now they padded silently across her hand-woven deep blue C-suite carpet.

“Please sit.” She pointed to the loveseat adjacent to her brass and glass coffee table.

I wasn’t in the mood for love. I chose a straight back chair to the side of the small couch.

OK, Boss, what do you have on your mind? You gonna lift up the covers? Come at me hard and strong? “John, you’re sick. John, you’ve started drinking again. John, I’m worried. John, you’re an asshole.” Right on all counts.

“John…”

Here it comes. I shoulda had a snort before I got here. Took something off Lydia’s cart, cleaner, solvent, anything. What the hell, why not?

“… we’ve noticed…”

That my hands shake like a man out in the cold. The freezing fucking cold.

“… that your surgeries…”

Are taking twice as long, that I cut and then need to stop, focus, grab my twisted fingers and straighten them before I proceed.

“… are taking longer…”

Longer and longer, and the staff standing next to me is afraid to say anything, to challenge me, so they say nothing, and hope and pray, as I do, that I don’t kill the poor sonofabitch on the table.

“… to begin, and I’m sorry for that. I apologize. We are working on procedures to improve our turnaround time. We will get better. We have to. We respect your time, and ours too. Let’s face it, turnaround time is the key to efficiency and quality.”

And profit, dollars, revenue, and keeping the other cutters happy.

Nothing — not a thing about Johnny’s shakes. His rockin’ and rollin’. His Parkinson’s. His post-Johnnie Walker heebie-jeebies.

I was home free. In the clear. My secret remained hidden.

“That’s it?” I sounded too short. Too indifferent. I was a surgeon. That’s how we act. Try again. “I mean,” I softened my voice. “I mean, I understand. Running a place of this magnitude, with all the moving parts must be a real challenge, and keeping all of us surgeons happy, well I hope you feel like I’m not one of those,” I was laying it so fucking thick, “kinds of docs who is not a team player.”

Rachel stood. She shook my hand. My sweaty shaky hand. Gripped it firmly then spoke. “I assure you we will improve. You are,” She emphasized 'are' like she had been trained for this, “a team player and we value you.”

Value me? That? What?

“Thanks Rachel. We will work together,” I lied.

I exited the C-suite’s lush carpeting, sparkling glass and overstuffed love seats, smug, smiling ear to fucking ear. I had conned her. Conned everybody. I could continue with the secret that only you and I know.

I even had a spring in my drunk ass Parkinsonian feet.

I hit the marble floor bounding down the hallway enjoying every click.

I darted into the Mens to straighten my Jerry Garcia tie and to make sure I knew how proud of myself I was. The bathroom was cool. A minty aroma drifted through the air making me smile and wink at myself in the mirror. “Champ,” I said with disgusting cockiness. “You got away with it. You’re golden.”

“Bullshit.” Her voice bounced off the beautifully tiled walls “You ain’t foolin’ me.”

I turned. Lydia. “I thought you was...” She shook her head with contempt.

A good man? A respected doctor? A what?

“… different.”

“Lydia? What do you mean?”

“You know what the fuck I mean.”

I did. I knew exactly what she meant.

I left the sweet smelling bathroom of the prestigious hospital where I perform complex surgeries on unsuspecting victims.

I know what Lydia meant.

Exactly.

But I have Parkinson’s. My error. It has me. And I’m a drunk.

So I have an excuse. A reason.

“You have no excuse Dr. John.” She didn’t look at me as she left.

I did. I have Parkinson’s. I am a drunk.

[hellofastestnewsfan]

The photographs of the beating show DeAndre Harris curled up in a ball on the floor of a parking lot trying to protect his face and body as the men around him, some armed with boards or pipes, strike him repeatedly. The men beating Harris were there to attend the white-nationalist rally in Charlottesville last August, where one counter-protester, Heather Heyer, was killed when a car drove into the crowd. Harris, who survived the beating with eight staples in his skull, might have been the second.

To an uninformed observer, the picture may look like an image of mob violence. But to many of the men beating Harris and their attorneys, it shows something else: Men acting in self defense.

“To be honest, I was terrified,” Jacob Scott Goodwin, one of the men arrested for beating Harris told the jury during his trial. “I’d probably perish or be sent to the hospital and be terribly hurt.”

If a claim of self defense as justification for brutally attacking an unarmed man sounds familiar, Harris’s attorney, S. Lee Merritt, thinks it should.

“It works for cops, that’s what I thought when I heard it. It sounds very familiar from police brutality cases,” Merritt told me. “Unfortunately, in our culture, black men are often seen as threatening even when they’re the victims, as Mr. Harris clearly was.”

The jury didn’t buy it. Goodwin was convicted last week in a Charlottesville court of malicious wounding, which could carry up to 20 years in prison. But others arrested in connection with the rally are likely to try a similar defense. The attorney for Daniel Borden, a 19-year-old who prosecutors say struck Harris with a board three times, said he would argue for “third-person self-defense” because the attack started after Harris used his maglight to strike a flagpole that a participant in the march was using as a weapon.

Harris was charged with assault but  acquitted, and the judge determined that Harris “did not intend to harm” the man with the flag. In April, Matthew Engle, an attorney for Tyler Davis Watkins, said that Harris was attacked “through his own conduct,” and that his client “was responding to what he perceived to be a threat.” Watkins reacted “reasonably and proportionately” by striking Harris while he was getting up, Engle argued, not while Harris was lying on the ground. In a separate case, Richard Wilson Preston, who pleaded guilty Tuesday to a firearms charge after he fired his gun at a black counter-protester at the rally, also initially tried to argue he acted in self-defense.

Only Alex Michael Ramos, who bragged on Facebook after the beating that “We stomped some ass … getting some was fucking fun,” did not attempt to argue that he had acted in self defense. Instead, his attorney, Jake Joyce, argued that Ramos was guilty of the lesser charge of assault and battery. The jury convicted him of the more serious charge of malicious wounding.

For police, the fear defense has been effective—but not merely because police officers occasionally find themselves in quickly escalating, life-threatening situations. The Supreme Court has held that police can use lethal force if they have a “reasonable” belief that a suspect might hurt them or others, and through the warped prism of America, any fear of a black male can seem “reasonable” to a jury, especially if that jury is all-white. Grand juries consistently fail to indict cops who kill unarmed black people, even when those killed are children, like Tamir Rice. And those officers that do go to trial often prevail on the grounds that they were simply scared, like when the Chicago police officer Dante Servin was acquitted after he fired five shots into an alleyway at four people who had their backs turned to him, killing Rekia Boyd. Servin said he feared for his life. The first attempt to prosecute Michael Slager, the South Carolina officer who was recorded on video shooting Walter Scott in the back, ended in a mistrial. In perhaps the most famous example, the Los Angeles officers shown beating Rodney King senseless on video in 1991 were acquitted.

No wonder that the men caught on video attacking Harris believed that a jury might side with them if they insisted that they were afraid. In the racist imagination, black men are capable of superhuman feats of strength and stamina; it would only take one juror who shared that perception to produce a mistrial.

Virginia state laws only contain hate-crime enhancements for lesser charges, which means that in pursuing the more serious malicious wounding charge, prosecutors had to avoid discussing Goodwin and Ramos’s ideological leanings—that is, their motive for showing up at a racist rally in the first place. “We charged the most serious offense that we could under state law with the highest maximum penalty,” Joseph Platania, the Commonwealth’s attorney for the city of Charlottesville, told me after Goodwin was convicted. “We are appreciative of the careful attention the jury paid to the facts and are satisfied with the result.”

The prosecution didn’t raise Goodwin’s ideology at trial, but that didn’t stop Goodwin’s attorney, Elmer Woodard, from raising the issue to garner sympathy from the jury. “They want you to convict this man because he’s white, and DeAndre is a black man,” Woodard told the jury in his closing arguments. That appeal echoes what Goodwin has told his comrades on the outside—in one letter from Goodwin featured in an NBC documentary on Goodwin’s family, he declares, “my crime is being unapologetically white.” (Reached by phone, Woodard said he wouldn’t comment on the trial).

In a bygone Virginia, that appeal might have worked. In July 1898, John Henry James was dragged from a train station in Charlottesville by a mob and hung from a tree while he professed his innocence, after being accused of assaulting a white woman. Onlookers “emptied their revolvers into his body” and left it there for two hours, as “hundreds” of passersby gathered souvenirs from his corpse, according to one black Richmond paper. A local editor for a different newspaper noted that while he “feared mobs with the most upright intentions,” in the case of James, “the provocation was very great.” The local sheriff briefly threatened to charge the mob responsible for murdering James, which the editor described as the sheriff being “temporarily unbalanced” by the incident. Threatening to charge white people for mob violence against a black man was, in his view, a kind of temporary insanity.

Police killings of black men still exist in a kind of legal nether-region, where almost no set of circumstances can lead to prosecution or conviction. All over America, but particularly in the South, and in Virginia, that exception once applied not just to police, but to any white man who sought to bloody his hands against his black neighbors. The men who outnumbered and brutally attacked Harris, and have portrayed their celebratory beating of a black man at a white-supremacist rally as a kind of heroism, are seeking a return to that era, to that peculiar form of “justice.” For them, that was when America was truly great.

from The Atlantic https://ift.tt/2wqhbEt

[spaceboitakesflight-blog]

Imagination as Respiration, as Regiment for Pain. Imagination as Fuck it. Imagination as Fire.

Note: This article is much more helpful if you click the links. They range in types of content (articles, research, data, organizations to support) and have a lot of useful information! The majority of bold sections are lyrics from Mos Def & Talib Kweli are Black Star (1998). 

I trust, I hope Philando Castile’s spirit finds rest and justice in the fires lit for him.

Police are pigs, and should be treated as such.

The state arrested 18 protesters in Minnesota after the verdict came out.

The jury was more over 50% middle aged whites.

Bill Cosby rape case ended in mistrial.\ Could be 365 days til re-trail, but they're "pushing it along"... \ And how many white rapists will they let go low-profile in the span of that time? 

Charleena Lyles.

Say: Her name 

How many more cops will go free after committing murder? 

“Every year $9 billion dollars are wasted incarcerating people who've not been convicted of a crime, and insurance companies, who have taken over our bail system, go to the bank.”  

2.3 million people incarcerated. And if you are aware of anything in this country, you already know the racial breakdown.   The state will inflict fear in whatever ways it can. How physically, how psychologically difficult will they make it for any person of color to [fill in the blank].    

How many immigrants detained? How many people (”terrorists”) held in Guantanamo? How many survivors of domestic violence unjustly convicted? How many queer folks, how many trans women of color locked up or killed for existing? 

“Same song, just remixed, different arrangement Put you on a yacht but they won't call it a slave ship Strangeness, you don't control this, you barely hold this Screaming "brand new", when they just sanitized the old shit Suppose it's, just another clever Jedi mind trick”  

Why the fuck should anyone wait for these racist patriarchal systems to magically change, when we could burn it down and start again? How much longer will white people continue to lie to themselves? How much time can be bought, to “hide like thieves in the night from life”?  

This year I worked for a college access organization that serves first generation college students. After one of our weekly tutoring sessions, a visiting tutor asked “how we could have possibly ended up here”--”here” meaning, high school students not being able to pass basic math courses. I said there’s no question, the system is designed for these students to fail... In too many ways to count.   

Colorism: an intentional set of lethal mindgames.

“The paradox of education is precisely this - that as one begins to become conscious one begins to examine the society in which he is being educated.” -James Baldwin

Enter the need for critical consciousness.  

amerikkka creates its own twisted history. Writes a false narrative of motion. Spits it down our throats with pat on the back after every swallow. amerikkka stores archives of criminal evidence in its basement. Inconvenient, for gentrification, for the colonization agenda. Perfect for a culture of gas-lighting. Where violence hides behind the innocence of an opinion.  

“Because white men can’t/ police their imagination/ black men are dying.” - Claudia Rankine 

Imagination is deadly. Hence the state’s thirst to monitor and control the ways we think, the concepts we imagine. 

“A lot of people don't understand the true criteria of things Can't just accept the appearance, have to get the true essence”

amerikkka chooses to stay mentally and emotionally disturbed, caught in an abyss of disgusting history, frantically running through the same corporate racist cycles that are killing every good thing on this earth.   

amerikka will do anything to fuck with your head. Will force you to accept shit that is slowly killing you, or quickly killing the people around you, just to make it through another day. It will do anything to brainwash, to separate you from your own body, to wrap you in isolation until the fear of explosion is so great, dying doesn’t seem like a bad option. Suicide among people of color then, is not counted as murder by the state? 

Enter the truth.

“This life is temporary but the soul is eternal Separate the real from the lie, let me learn you”

Put in the work your mind deserves to undo the lies it has been soaked in.

“Yo, I'm sure that everybody out listening agree That everything you see ain't really how it be A lot of jokers out running in place, chasing the style Be a lot going on beneath the empty smile Most cats in my area be loving the hysteria Synthesized surface conceals the interior America, land of opportunity, mirages and camouflages”

I don’t think any of us will see a day of reconciliation and justice in this life. But the idea of freedom fuels revolution. “Freedom” can exist in our minds. It is the act of imagining that makes freedom more readily available in the mind than it can exist among these physical systems of oppression. 

“At exactly which point do you start to realize That (life without knowledge is death in disguise?) That's why, knowledge of self is like life after death”

"I will continue to say murder because where in this planet do you tell the truth and you be honest and you still be murdered by the police of Minnesota?" Valerie Castile asked. 

Every time I see an american flag, i burn it in my imagination. I kill trump in my imagination. shoot him, chop his head off. i feel  nothing but satisfaction. kathy griffith did it, for fake. a photoshoot. a stunt./ they took it for real life/ no fucks about the death toll in his name/

“So much on my mind that I can't recline Blastin' holes in the night 'til she bled sunshine Breathe in, inhale vapors from bright stars that shine Breathe out, weed smoke retrace the skyline Heard the bass ride out like an ancient mating call I can't take it, y'all, I can feel the city breathing Chest heaving, against the flesh of the evening Sigh before we die like the last train leaving” 

A lot of us are just trying to hold on. Not “go crazy”. Pay bills. Navigate relationships. Survive pain, hurt, trauma, loss. How can we move past survival? 

“Life or death, if I'm choosing with every breath I'm enhancing” 

Taking care of your mental health is important in order to use your mind to your advantage, to build structures of resilience and resistance. Understand what resources you need in order to do the work. Make steps to start the organization you have always dreamed of forming. Write your business plan. Pull the bars of music hiding beneath your chest. Write those poems simmering in your belly. Tag that building or train with your art. Be the teacher, mentor, parent you imagine yourself to be. Be the role model Philando was, and should have had more time to be. 

Free yourself to take productive risks in your efforts to self-sustain. 

Because for real, lets start our own healthcare networks. POC run history archives. POC art galleries. POC therapy centers. Our own economies, our own ways to exchange food and skills. 

Collective revolt calls for collective imagination. No justice, no peace. Do the healing to find your peace. Allow yourself to form community, and ride for that community/chosen family “Who are knowledge, truth, and peace seekers”.

Fight for your imagination and the wonders it feeds you. Preserve your energy. Direct it in places of healing. Talk to your ancestors. Allow yourself days to feel sad and tired. Allow yourself days to feel strong and motivated. Keep trying. 

They will never know where your inspiration comes from. Where your fire originates. They will not understand your ability to keep breathing. to hold the fire in your chest and not burn. to drink water then spit bombs on cop cars. to grieve so hard your body thrashes salt against the walls, then still grow so soft, so centered.

Imagine: create: like your life depends on it.

[homelessnyugradstudent-blog]

When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong: United States of America Edition

Some words from Thomas Jefferson, perhaps the most revered of our Founding Fathers:

Under the law of nature, all men are born free, every one comes into the world with a right to his own person, which includes the liberty of moving and using it at his own will. This is what is called personal liberty, and is given him by the author of nature, because necessary for his own sustenance.

Some more words from Thomas Jefferson:

For men probably of any color, but of [black] we know, brought from their infancy without necessity for thought or forecast, are by their habits rendered as incapable as children of taking care of themselves, and are extinguished promptly wherever industry is necessary for raising young. In the mean time they are pests in society by their idleness, and the depredations to which this leads them. Their amalgamation with the other color produces a degradation to which no lover of his country, no lover of excellence in the human character can innocently consent.

America is in many ways an experiment. And, like any experiment, there are results. In the arena of race and reckoning with our history of oppression, we have failed this experiment. It should not take the Grand Jury decisions concerning the deaths of Michael Brown and Eric Garner to see this. Twenty-five percent of whites do not think the justice system is biased against blacks; sixty-eight percent of blacks think it is biased. Where you come down on this likely derives from your racial identity, political views, and degree of cynicism. I’m not going to delve into the justice system tonight because I gotta be to my soul-deadening, meaningless job in six hours and would like to have enough energy to possibly sneak off and masturbate at work, but I do wanna touch on privilege.

I know some of my editors just groaned. I know some of the people reading this post rolled their eyes and are muttering things about social justice warriors and ethics in gaming journalism and whether being a white person is a “bad thing” and how Taylor Swift’s new album is actually cool and good. Anyway, the refrain goes: I worked hard and my life was hard and I didn’t get any breaks, so this whole privilege thing is overblown.

And maybe you did work hard! Maybe your life is hard! Most lives are hard. Life is a puddle of piss festering in a public restroom. Life is a kidney stone you’re trying to pass. Life is, if you’re lucky, 80 years of distracting yourself from death and trying (and failing) to accomplish most of your socially constructed and inherently meaningless goals.

But to propagate the myth that equality of opportunity, liberty, and law exists in this country is absurd. To argue that race, not the culture of certain races but race itself, contributes to this is also absurd. No, this is not playing the race card. The people who complain that people like me are “making this about race” are people who do not have to worry about how their race affects their lives. And that is a privilege. It is a privilege to have your Founding Fathers say groups other than your own are subhuman. It is a privilege to turn on the TV and see mostly people who look like you, with bosses who look like you, and writers who share American experiences with you. It is a privilege to step into your expensive office and make your six-figure salary around people who look like you and talk like you and share the same values as you because they grew up in places filled with people that look like you and talk like you and so on.

America is a nation founded not so much on liberty as on White Supremacy. Not the Ku Klux Klan kind, but the kind that leads to government-proctored housing discrimination, a legacy of separate but not-at-all equal, the century of state-sponsored white-on-black terrorism that marked the period after the civil war, and the disastrous War on Drugs.

There are two basic Americas. One is an idealized version that matches the first Thomas Jefferson quote in this post. The other is a viciously racist White Supremacist one that matches the second quote. Which America you experience is likely tied to your personal history and the history of your ancestors. If you haven’t considered the centuries-long ramifications of the second quote, you’re probably white. If you believe in Thomas Jefferson’s idealized America rather than, say, Ta-Nehisi Coates’ fucked-up-in-the-DNA America. you’re probably sick of hearing about privilege. But understand this: getting sick of the privilege police is a privilege. Having privilege doesn’t make you a bad person; it doesn’t mean you don’t work hard, but it does mean that you have a host of institutional advantages my friend Junior, who grew up in the ghetto and got shot by the police under dubious circumstances, did not have. So please just consider this: the deaths of Michael Brown, Eric Garner, and Junior did not happen in a vacuum. They are stained by this country’s racist foundations, and the ramifications of this racism affects all sorts of life outcomes and actions that you, because of racial privilege, might cast aside as whiny, lazy, or worse.

Not all of Wu-Tang Financial will agree with me and that’s fine. They don’t need to. You don’t need to either. All I’m asking is to think about ways in which America’s history makes the American experience different, and not idealized, for different groups of people.

This ain’t news to me, but it is to a lotta the people I’m defriending on Facebook. America ain’t the land of life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness for everyone. And, from the very beginning, that was by design.

Hence, the United States of America: when keeping it real goes wrong.