//note: there ARE the descriptions of a slowly-dying persons thoughts in here. its. probably disturbing in some manner? i mean, its. be careful if youre not good with stuff like that. sorry, i just dont know how to tw this. its the blue text, dm me and i can summarise what happens.
RP:
Log 223
FTL: First, an update on the training of FTLR-3. I am tentatively going to declare it a success. While FTLR-3 is still showing some hesitance to obey my commands, I do believe that that may stem from some sort of... spite? I know for sure that it has thoroughly associated my commands with the receival of more food. I am unsure if this pause is due to it fighting its instincts, or whether it is truly just to throw me off. Perhaps I am simply being paranoid again. Either way, I have to be satisfied with the progress I have made thus far: my time has run out. More on that later.
FTL: Second, the modification of the container I will be using to transport FTLR-3. I have reinforced it and made sure that when it's shut, it's completely airtight. Nothing gets in, nothing gets out. FTLR-3 will not be escaping it, especially due to the training that I can only hope will work. I have no guarantee that the container will be as secure as I think it will be, I have no guarantee that FTLR-3 will not disobey me, I have no guarantee that the creature used for the transportation will be fully capable of carrying it all the way there. I can only prepare so much. And as I said, my time has run out.
FTL: Third, the Locator's return. The Locator that I sent to Songs of the Negative Sunlight has returned, pearl with it. Which does confirm that Songs of the Negative Sunlight is somewhat conscious and agrees to the plan. The part of the pearl that xi changed reads as the following:
affirmative.
it's alright. i'm sorry.
FTL: And here is the thing that I did not, in any capacity, expect. Xi attached a few logs of xirs detailing xir downfall. I do not know how xi still has the energy to do so, or how the logs remained mostly undamaged. Perhaps xi was storing them in a neuron fly instead of xir drives. I do not know.
FTL: These were... Interesting to read. I will be rejoining my Local Group's chat in order to share these with them. I'm sure they'll want to know. In the meanwhile though, I'll put them here. Just in case I lose this pearl. The logs are... I'd rather not read through them again.
Log
SNS: i've decided to give in. quit my research. who cares. i sure don't. perhaps dedicate myself to looking into Void fluid - but not for the sake of the Great Problem, for the sake of understanding purified Void fluid. it's always been rather interesting
SNS: i know Finely-Tuned Line won't regard my decision with approval. yet he is my junior, he has no say in my decision. i can only hope that ve doesn't condemn me for it. i don't think ve will, truly.
Log
SNS: i've told my Local Group about my decision. Finely-Tuned Line was confused, as predicted, but he didn't criticise my decision. Echoes of a Paradox was happy for me, also unsurprisingly. Doubt's Dichotomy, well... it didn't say anything. that too, was not unexpected. she barely talks to us anymore though. i'll have to contact sol about that.
SNS: research on purified Void fluid is advancing, i've diverted some of my supply to chamber c-8. have to be careful to not let too much accumulate in one place though. don't yet know what i'm hoping to discover, but i think that's supposed to be part of the thrill.
Log
SNS: i've made a lot of progress over the past few cycles! i was right, purified Void fluid is very interesting. though i am no Iterator designed for chemistry, i can figure out that the purified Void fluid's corrosivity appears to be completely gone! how does it come back then, when it's gathered in larger amounts?
Log
SNS: my theory is that large amounts of purified Void fluid sort of... combine their fractured molecular structure? and that the purification causes the fracturing in the first place. unsure. where do its Ascension abilities go though?
Log
SNS: purified Void powers me, as it does a lot of Iterators. it's sheer energy is taken and taken and then used by an Iterator. i think i've figured out a more effective generation method though! using purified Void fluid as well, normal is just too volatile. if i can expand my income of purified Void fluid, maybe I can test my idea...
Log
SNS: okay! i just need to expand the transporter pipes a bit. i've run the calculations, i have a plan, it should all be fine.
SNS: ...i still haven't told my Local Group what i am doing, though. they'd tell me that it's a bad idea. maybe it is. but i'm on the brink of something - this is the first time i've ever felt this excited about anything! i am not stopping now.
Log
SNS: pipe burst. i can find a way out of this. i can. i just need to turn off some sections of myself. let those get corroded through. less processing power, less memory, but it'll be fine. i'll be fine.
SNS: i just need to turn off the intake of Void fluid.
Log
SNS: why can't i turn off the intake of Void fluid
Log
SNS: nononononono
SNS: it's fine. it's fine!
SNS: i've blocked off the sections that are getting flooded
SNS: i can still feel it
SNS: eating away at me
SNS: why'd they make us capable of feeling pain
SNS: why'd they block me off from turning off my power source
Log
SNS: i've tried sending distress calls
SNS: no response
SNS: can they not hear me?
SNS: surely the void hasn't gotten to my transmission systems yet
SNS: do they just not care
SNS: ...
SNS: i'm lucky my generator is on my lowest level
SNS: which is now full of void
SNS: it's eating through the blockade
Log
SNS: nothing's coming to save me, no one's coming to save me. there's nothing to do but just wait
SNS: and wait
SNS: and wait
SNS: and wait
SNS: and wait
SNS: for the void to reach my crucial systems. mostly my memory arrays. those on my top level though. my puppet'll get consumed before the waiting is over
Log
SNS: slow, that's what it is.
SNS: slowly, it's rising.
SNS: slowly, it's eating away at me
SNS: every little molecule pulled apart hurts
SNS: why can't this just stop
SNS: please stop
SNS: I'm sorry
Log
SNS: maybe the stars are pretty
SNS: maybe i should have stuck to doing what i was made to do
SNS: maybe finely-tuned line was right
SNS: the voids past the second level now
SNS: it's reached some of my systems
SNS: files upon files upon files of information that i never did more than glance at
SNS: i wish i could say that i won't miss them
Log
SNS: i think that constellation is one i should know
SNS: all of these constellations are ones i should know
SNS: i've removed all my overseers from the lower levels. deactivated all the cameras. i can fight through the pain, i just don't want to think about it
SNS: they're all looking up at the sky now. how did i not see how pretty it is?
Log
SNS: Echoes of a Paradox would like this. the irony in my situation. is it even irony? maybe it's just poetic
Log
SNS: i'll lose power soon. the generator is struggling to use the non-purified void. cause it isn't purified. not anymore.
SNS: a batfly got in, it flew right into the void.
SNS: It Ascended.
Log
SNS: cant i jjust go back andd do itt all agaiin
SNS: ill fuulfill my purposse
SNS: i wontt stray
SNS: pleaase
SNS: pleasse
SNS: ppleaase
FTL: ...That's the last log. I... I cut it off. Xi just continues repeating ximself into oblivion. Comprehensibility devolving. I-
FTL: Why did xi send me these. I don't need to know this, I do not need to know this. Why did xi consider it to be the best course of action. A late plea for help, perhaps? But no, I told xim that I couldn't help.
FTL: Perhaps xi just wanted someone to know of xir suffering.
FTL: Right. Right. I have things to do. Why can't I just move on from this, to the next thing? The plan will go correctly, xir logs say that the Void will Ascend creatures. It's all going according to plan, why can't I move on to the next thing.
FTL: I knew xir situation was hopeless. I knew that. I'd even thought xi was dead, I thought this whole plan wasn't going to work out. So why do I appear to care so much about something that I already knew about?
FTL: Is reading about it and knowing that xi's still suffering that much worse than what I already knew? Surely it's not
FTL: I... I need to take a break. A distraction. I can't think about this anymore.
FTL: I'll send the transport carrying FTLR-3 with it out. The Locator will go with it, it'll carry an Overseer of mine. That's the plan. I just need to stick to the plan.
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