#Yahya's mom is kind of a Karen

[beautifulstarsbeastars]

Quarantined Turf War

This is an idea I’ve had for several months now-like what if, due to a ‘certain world crises that is going on in real life’ the Turf War has to take place on a video chat? I haven’t written anything of this idea yet as I have no real plot to this one-shot, but here are some highlights I have so far:

- Ten gets hit in the head by a roll of toilet paper (thrown by one of her fellow foxes).

- Gosha is entranced by the filters/icon edits(?) and ends up having a donut with his face on it as his video icon and can’t figure out how to fix it.

- The Shishigumi are all drunk/high and Melon has to be the voice of reason (which he hates!) and I quote: “Why the flying f*ck would you do that??!!” (yelled/asked when Free comes to him with a very bizarre problem)

- On that note, Sabu and Jinma decide they want to watch a horror movie/Game of Thrones (thought up because my sister and dad have been watching that a lot lately) and Agata is too scared to watch it so he goes crying to Melon. 

quotes:

“You know how sensitve he is! Watch something else!”

“I thought you didn’t care, Boss!”

“I don’t! But Agata’s annoying whining becomes my problem! Now change the damn channel”

- On the same note, Dolph comes up with a new nicknmae for Melon! Much to his annoyance: “Mello!...Yellow Mello!...Jello Mello!...Yellow jello Mello! Mello-lo-jello-yellow-Mellomellomellomello!”

- And also, Miguel takes Hino’s enchilada-Melon has to yell: “GIVE HIM THE ENCHILADA!”

- Yahya is high voiced due to a helium tank breaking in the air vents of the police building. He later throws his laptop out the window in a fit of rage. 

- A video of Oguma dancing is found (he is either dancing to Gangman style or doing the dance from the Take on Me videos on YouTube) and Louis is both embaressed and shocked at how well his father can dance. 

- A debate as to how one could overdose on Laxitives and if one’s colon could explode if that happens (instead of dying). 

- (not as sure about this one but) Yahya’s mother somehow finds the chat and joins it to harass Yahya for never marrying or giving her grandchildren before calling Gosha a talking donut and Melon a half pizza face (or just insulting Melon and Legosi as hybrids) while Yahya’s father does something stupid in the background while naked (this would likely be why Yahya throws his laptop out the window).

- On that note, Yahya’s mother thinks Gosha and Yahya are ‘back together’-she’s fine with it, but only if they swore they’d adopt horse children (she just wants Yahya to get married and have kids, she doesn’t care who he marries or how he has kids)-uncomfortable and awkward silence follows.

- One of Legosi’s neighbor’s has a loud and very weird phone conversation outside of his door and everyone can hear it. Whatever it is, it leaves them speechless. Also, his (new) pet beetle crawls over the webcam, freaking out/startling everyone else. 

- Two of Savon’s fellow Komodo dragons get into a heated argument, causing him to intervene. It’s what they were arguing about thats baffling.

This would be a parody of the 180′s and 190′s chapters (though some characters/chapters would not appear/be mentioned in it (glaring at chapter 181 and Melon’s father) and would be, basically, be about Beastars characters in quarentine (COVID would not be mentioned in the fic-except as ‘this virus’ and the fic is not at all meant to make fun of COVID or anyone effected by it-this is just a ‘life in quarentine’ take on the Turf War).

All characters belong to Beastars (Except for Yahya’s parents, I made them up!)

Quarantined Turf War is (c) Me