#You meet in a tavern is frankly a more interesting setup

[8one6]

Dear kindle unlimited writers,

If you set your book in a magic academy I'm going to need to see an amazing fucking hook in the description or I'm skipping past it and not looking back.

[ficsandcatsandficsandcats]

*tosses all my coins to my writer* Okay I've got another platonic idea! Imagine Jaskier is in a tavern waiting for Geralt and meets another bard who is waiting for his companion as well. Both start talking and ranting about their companions and that they don't know what it means to be a bard and sing about others who get all the fame and no one remembers the bard. Maybe they start writing a duet about this legendary evening.

Fandom: The WitcherPairing: Platonic!Jaskier and ReaderWord Count: 978Rating: GTaglist: @heroics-and-heartbreak a/n: Ooh I like this! Justice for Bards!!!

“Another,” you said, raising your hand to wave the bartender down.

“I’ll have the same,” a voice said and you turned to see a man pulling up to the seat next to you. He placed his lute on the bar, echoing your own setup, though his lute was much more ornate. You caught his eye and he gestured to the lute.

“Ah, a fellow member of the guild,” he said.

“I was about to say the same,” you replied. Two ales were placed in front of you, the bartender grumpily trying to find a way to hand them to you without endangering your instruments.

“Does this mean we’ll have to arm wrestle to decide who goes first?” he asks jokingly.

“Ah, no, I performed earlier. I’m just… waiting,” you say, unable to hide the bitterness in your voice.

“It seems our list of similarities only grows. I am also waiting for my companion. Geralt of Rivia. The Witcher. You may have heard of him,” the man says casually.

“Oh of course, you must be the famous Jaskier,” you say, to which he nods his head with faux humility.

“Who do you wait for?” he asks, taking a drink from his cup.

“No one so renowned but another hunter. Tell me something,” you say, turning to face him, “How do you get Geralt to take you seriously?”

Jaskier’s face breaks into incredulous laughter.

“Oh I only wish I had an answer for you but I’m afraid Geralt very much does not take anything I do seriously. Then again, gods knows he’s serious enough for the both of us,” he mumbles into his drink.

“Alright see this is interesting because it’s very much the same for myself and my companion. I accompany him and I’ve always viewed our relationship as very recriprocal, I taking the adventures me go on and spinning them into songs beloved by all, him receiving free performances and no small amount of fame and respect thanks to the aforementioned songs. But he treats me like a parasite more often than not,” you exclaim, relieved to find someone to vent to who understands what you’re going through. Jaskier’s already nodding before you finish your rant.

“Yes, exactly so! He couldn’t walk down a street without being pelted with harsh words or literally pelted with things. I come around, write one song and turn the whole thing around. What do I hear from him? ‘That’s not how it happened.’ Like anyone wants to listen to a bloody song about just walking away from a fight. Bollocks,” Jaskier says, your anger fueling his own frustrations.

“Y’know what I think the problem is? I think they truly believe what we do is easy,” you say. Jaskier scoffs and slaps his hand on the bar.

“That’s exactly it,” he replies, gesturing for emphasis, “They think it’s all fun and games, as if making it look easy and fun isn’t a part of the work!”

“He has no idea how many nights I want nothing more than to slide off to bed but I have a reputation to uphold and frankly money does not grow on trees and more than once my earnings have gotten us a warm meal, or my performance has been trade for a bed to sleep in,” you complain.

“We’re supposed to uplift them and make everyone see how hard they work and how grand they are but what of us? Who sings of the bard? We go on the same adventures. What, if you don’t have a sword or magic you’re somehow not as brave? Gotta slay a dragon for respect these days?” Jaskier’s voice gets louder and to anyone looking in from far away it looks as though you’re having a heated debate, your faces flushing warm and facing each other.

“I bet they’d change their tune pretty fast if we started singing about someone else,” you suggested, the spark of rebellion glinting in your eyes.

“Yeah but the bastards do go on some cracking adventures,” Jaskier sighs, “Why? Who were you thinking?”

You lean in close, conspiratorially, looking like spies preparing to exchange secret information.

“Us,” you say. The word hangs in the air and your eyes stay locked, considering the idea with uncertainty that bleeds into giddiness.

“Yes,” Jaskier says decisively and fumbles around in his bag as you do the same, both producing notebooks and quills in tandem, further crowding the bar space. You spend the next hour collaborating, peppering in ideas with praise for each other’s turn of phrase and deft rhymes. At one point you both have your lutes in hand, trying out different melodies to suit the words you’d begun drafting, altering the prose as you go to fit the tune, crafting a song for the bards. You’re just harmonizing on the final melody when Geralt walks into the tavern, seeking out Jaskier. You see the witcher and internally you’re excited to see this mythical figure but you carefully school your features to remain casual.

“Ah, Geralt, this is my friend… oh dear I never asked your name,” Jaskier says as he turns to you.

“Y/N,” you answer. He turns his eyes over Geralt briefly and then goes, “And you are?”

Jaskier laughs gleefully and Geralt just looks at you impassively, not offering so much as a grunt of response before turning back to Jaskier.

“If you’re ready?” he asks.

“You know what, I’m not just yet. Do take a seat and wait for me. The ale is great,” Jaskier says and then swivels back towards you to continue to work on the song. Geralt blinks for a moment and then lumbers over to a table towards the back and nurses an ale as the two of you continue to work on your song, making plans to meet up at the next available occasion to debut it for the world.