so im changing the title to
Out of Pocket Things Ive Heard Pt2
• "i am a soggy towel"-Kloppenburg
• "back the fuck up you soggy lampshade"- Ashley G
• "this is why i keep my skin closed at all times"-thadeeliv
• "getting into a fistfight with the student affairs unit and also with god"- heavensickness
• "you aren't a real woman unless your knees have babies trapped in them."-peetbools
• "this is why you dont deserve the declaration of independence!"- half asleep kai yelling at a dream cat
• "gay is an adjective!"-some kid in school library
• "potato, yes potato"- jasper on snap
• "thats not very RISE of you"- Leo in avid
• "she didn't want me in her car so i threatened to beat her up too"- onetimeidreamt
• "i smell poor people" - Norah in the clearance section of Fendi
• "dobby says down with the government!"- Dannyphantomexe
• "she said the cup has grippers shes delusional!" -payton ab Hailey
1 note
·
View note
I’ve grown to appreciate the aus where Shen Yuan enters the story as “Shen Yuan” - same name, probably similar face, generally able to interact with PIDW as himself and change the story through his added presence. I like the sense of “if only you’d been here, things might have been better the first time around” of it all.
And I was thinking, it’s a funny coincidence in that scenario that someone named Shen Yuan gets put into… another Shen Yuan. What are the chances? What a weird twist of fate that Airplane would pick out the name that his most dedicated critic could slip into seamlessly.
What about a version where it’s not coincidence at all?
Airplane goes to school with a kid named Shen Yuan. He’s prickly and hard to approach and a little intense, but Airplane is persistent. In fairness, Airplane is relentless - and maybe it’s a good thing that they end up being friends, because they’re a little too much for anyone else to handle. They balance each other out. They’re the “weird kids” in class and they’re okay with that, because even when they don’t have any words for it, they know they’re not like their classmates, not really. That’s okay; they don’t want to be.
Recesses and breaks are consumed with the elaborate stories that Airplane wants to tell, and all the holes Shen Yuan pokes into them. It’s not mean-spirited, though, even though Shen Yuan isn’t the kind to temper his words. It’s passionate. He cares about those stories the way Airplane cares about them, and it can’t be mistaken for anything else when they lean together conspiratorially across the lunchroom table. They’ve both got notebooks filled with details and characters and monsters. Shen Yuan’s practically got a whole bestiary sketched out in wobbly childhood attempts at art, entries fervently scrawled beside them. Airplane prattles out plots nonstop, always with the promise of shining eyes and being asked “what happens next?”
They come up with a whole world together. Airplane’s going to write about it someday. Shen Yuan is going to read every word.
Shen Yuan misses school. Shen Yuan starts missing school a lot.
Airplane goes to the hospital room instead. He doesn’t think to worry, because Shen Yuan is okay - that’s what he says. He looks okay, and he’s a kid, and it doesn’t feel real that anything bad should happen to a kid. He doesn’t think to worry. He doesn’t think to say goodbye.
It’s one of the older Shen brothers who catches him on the way up to the room one day, in the hallway just outside - snaps at him to go the fuck home, and when Airplane hesitates, pushes him into the elevator and tells him not to come back. “Tells” is a generous way to describe the way the words come out - a growl, a hiss, the sound an animal would make when a hand got too close to a wound.
(It’s not fair to name a villain after him, even if the name never really comes up in the story. He wasn’t trying to be mean. He’d lost a brother minutes before, and he was getting his brother’s friend out of the way so he didn’t have to… see. It isn’t fair, but then, none of it is fair.)
Death feels very real after that.
The notebooks get shoved into a closet, and it’s not until Airplane’s moving out and one falls on him from a high shelf that he thinks about it again. He’s written things, lots of things, but nothing as ambitious as this - nothing as important. It could be good, he considers. He’d promised. Shen Yuan wanted to read it.
The problem was that no one else does, not for a long time, not until Airplane has whittled himself and his art into a corner and into such an unfamiliar shape that he has to wonder how it’s still his own face he sees in the mirror. He has to eat. He has to pay rent. Shen Yuan would yell at him, but Shen Yuan isn’t there to yell at him, and who cares. Who cares if it could have been better? The people who actually are here love it, and it’s paying his bills, and sometimes stories don’t go the way they’re supposed to and the world is fucking unfair. It doesn’t matter.
(It does. But he shoves that thought away along with styrofoam cups and soda bottles to the bottom of a garbage bag.)
Authors are not gods and their power is limited, but Airplane exercises just a sliver of what he’s been granted and gifts an inconsequential sort of immortality. He thinks about making him a rogue cultivator, maybe the kind that goes around documenting beasts and compiling his findings. He thinks about making him someone too powerful for death to touch, or too important to threaten, but when Airplane looks at the world he crafted and everything that’s become of it, it feels like the kindest thing he can do for Shen Yuan is a childhood where he’s loved, and a death that’s peaceful. What does it say about that world, that he’d kill off his best friend too early again instead of making him live there?
(The best writing he ever does is the only, shining moment of humanity that his scum villain ever displays: a lament about death that comes too early, about a brother gone too soon. The commenters praise him. The commenters flatter over how real the emotions feel. The commenters don’t get any response from Airplane on that chapter.)
Death is incredibly real when it comes for him too early, too, still hovering over his keyboard with the story technically finished and incredibly incomplete. Airplane could tell himself that’s because the written version can never be the version in the writer’s head, always shifting and with every possibility still on the table, but he knows better than that. The System knows better than that, with its condescending message about “improving” his writing and “closing plot holes” and “achieving his original vision”...
…and he’s a child again. He’s a child in his own story, he’s Shang Qinghua now without the benefit yet of a peak or cultivation or anything, and maybe he’s a little bitter, and a little scared, and…
And Shen Yuan - with longer hair, with robes, with a couple of older kids watching him from across the street, but undeniably the prickly little boy who used to sit down imperiously across from him and tell him everything that was wrong with the chuck of writing that had been handed to him last period, but with that smile that said he was only invested because he knew it could be better and they were going to make it better - marches up to him with a fire in his eyes and a frown that warns of a coming tirade.
“You told it wrong,” is the first thing he says.
Shang Qinghua wants to ask how him how he’s here, how this is possible, or maybe laugh because, yeah - yeah, Shen Yuan has no goddamn idea how wrong he got absolutely everything.
(Shang Qinghua wants to say “I missed you” and “why did you leave so soon” but he’s here now. He’s right here.)
“I know,” he says instead. “I’m sorry. It all kind of… spiraled out of control.”
Shen Yuan frowns, but then it dissipates the way it always does, and his eyes shine with ideas the way they always used to. “That’s okay,” he relents, grabbing for his hand. “We’ll fix it. We’ll make it what it was supposed to be.”
899 notes
·
View notes
Who is the more well-adjusted twin; Damian, or Danyal? Why, it's Damian, of course!
And I have an explanation for this! But first I wanna preface this that this is just me like, rambling about this thought I have and it's not an attack on the trope as a whole. I love the Danyal Al Ghul au which is why i'm so deeply passionate about it, because I think it has a lot of potential to be explored. It's no secret that I've mentioned before that I think Danny's psychological development tends to get overlooked and underutilized in DAG aus, and the impact that growing up in an assassin league often goes ignored. This is just me further expanding on that.
Now lets set the stage! This is specifically for Danny who is adopted by the Fentons later down in life. Lets go twin au. At 10 years old, Damian goes to the Wayne Family, Danny is adopted by the Fentons (regardless of their affiliation with the League). By 14 years old, who ends up the better adjusted, more socially aware, spiritually in-tune with themselves, sibling? Why, Damian is! Why is that?
Because he has the actual support he needs compared to Danny. And I'm not talking about good or bad parents Fentons, because either way my opinion doesn't change. Damian would end up the better off twin, because, frankly, his family knows his background. They know he grew up in the League, they know what the League's teachings are, and they know he's a born and raised assassin. Knowing this, they can then help tackle and dismantle the teachings and lessons he has been given and ingrained into by the League. They may be a dysfunctional family, but they're functional enough to at least actively help deprogram all of the League's teachings that have been ingrained in Damian throughout his childhood.
Can't say the same for Danny.
Lets say Fentons here don't know his background -- and even if they do, the results may just stay the same if they play their cards wrong, -- Danny's now just been thrown into the deep end of a pool and is essentially being told sink or swim. Regardless of how he got there -- undercover, faked death, etc -- he has no proper support. He knows the League is meant to be secret, he's not gonna speak on it for various reasons. Whether it be some still lingering loyalty, fear of harm, or whatever. Whatever the reason is, he does not have a proper support system in the Fentons, no matter how nice they are. They can only tackle the surface level stuff and whatever Danny allows them to see -- if Danny ever lets them see it at all. For what do assassins do when they don't want to be caught? They hide. Sometimes in plain sight.
"But Jazz--" Jazz is a child. She is 2 years older than Danyal and no better at giving him a proper support system than the two adult Fenton parents, even with parentification. We don't know when she got into psychology or how long she'd been studying it by the time Danny's 14. We just know she's really into it. Even then, Jazz is not a licensed or reliable therapist, or even an experienced or implied good therapist, and should not be used as one either. It's a disservice to her character to reduce her down to 'supporting female emotional crutch'. Besides, therapy only works on people who want to get better. Danny, who'd be hiding who he really is, has very little incentive to want to, or to even think something is wrong with his way of thinking, even with exposure to the outside world.
When people's beliefs are outright challenged, they tend to double down on them, and Jazz canonically has a habit of psychoanalyzing her family and declaring what she thinks is the problem -- regardless of whether or not she's right about it. Jazz would get into psychology, try and psychoanalyze Danny, and all it would do is cause him to clam up, shut into himself further, and throw up even more walls so that she can't figure out that he has been lying this whole time. It would do more harm than good, and would actively hinder any progress he'd make in trying to open up to them. Roads and good intentions and all that.
That being said, I think Danny's development and dismantling of the League's teachings would be slower than Damian's. Much slower. Because he would be the one having to pick apart everything and figure out what is right, what is wrong, what he wants to keep, and what he wants to toss. Everything he unlearns would be stuff he has to unlearn himself. If he even gets to that point at all -- depending on his experiences, he very well could not change at all, or change very little. The League acts as a purge for humanity, meant to reign in their hubris and retain balance, they just also happen to be assassins for hire. Danny's time spent in Amity Park could as well strengthen his belief in their teachings just as much as it could weaken it, especially if it goes as canon and he gets bullied.
Regardless, being tossed to a civilian family as someone who is very much not a civilian, without any support, would be actively detrimental to Danny's overall mental health and development. Especially to strangers like the Fentons. Damian was closed off and standoffish even with blood family, and it took him time to open up to them -- Danny, with the Fentons, would be even more so. He doesn't know them, he doesn't trust them, he has no rhyme or reason to open up to them, and since the Fentons don't actually know him, they can't help him the way he needs. Once "Danny Fenton" is made, he has even less reason to open up. So long as Danyal allows it, they will only ever know Danny, and they'll never know Danyal.
TL:DR the Fentons aren't the better family option just because they're civilians, and actually that makes them the worser option between the two because they can't give Danny the proper support he needs. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
289 notes
·
View notes
Batfam as things my friends and I have said
Tim, at a toy store: Don't get close to me with that affectionate shit. *spots toy trucks* Look, trucks :D
--------------
Cassandra: Maybe that's why my life's so peaceful. Because I don't like men
-------------
Tim: I'm bisexual. I don't like choosing
------------
Damian: They're holding hands. I hope they die
------------
Stephanie: If I had a penis....
------------
Stephanie: The other day Duke learnt about periods. He was devastated.
Duke, fake crying: Shit ain't right
------------
Tim: Can I just kill myself, guys?
Dick: Not yet, Timmy
------------
Jason: I don't wanna smell it, Dick
------------
Jason: Stephanie, I wanna drink
Stephanie + Jason simultaneously: Drink alcohol. yeah.
------------
Duke: I'm doing it correctly but my answers still not coming up
Damian: Then you're not doing it correctly
------------
Dick, pointing at pads: How strong is your pussy?
------------
Jason: Am I scared or am I hard?
------------
Cassandra: Why did you look at me with that tone???
------------
Bruce: The omegaverse? That was in the spiderman movie, right?
------------
Stephanie: Why must we decide?
Tim: The bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam or Eve
------------
Damian: I'm not exotic, I'm just brown
------------
Stephanie: Are penises heavy?
------------
Duke: I'm just...
Stephanie: Ken
Tim: a girl
Duke: dead.
------------
Dick: Now that we're alone let's get into the real stuff. What's your childhood trauma, babygirl?
------------
Dick: Look at those gay flags
Jason: Those are countries
629 notes
·
View notes
can you pls write some banter prompts <33
ofc!! and thanks for the ask :)))
𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙨:
have fun with these | tag me if you use any | if yall want more prompts like this, jus drop an ask
“Do you trust me?” “Yeah, but I feel like I shouldn’t?”
“If you were a movie, you would be a comedy.” “Aww, because I make you laugh?” “No, because you’re ridiculously stupid.”
“You’re like a good book: I can’t seem to put you down.” “You know how to read?”
“Did you steal my fries?” “No, I just borrowed them indefinitely.”
“You’re a clown.”
“You’re the most unique person I’ve ever met.” “Unique is just a nice way to say weird.”
"You're like a puzzle I can't solve." "Oh, so I'm a brain teaser now?" "More like a never-ending Sudoku."
“You love my cooking, right?” “It’s like an arduous adventure for the taste buds.”
“I’ll pay you to leave me alone.” “I thought you said I was priceless to you?”
“You’re just like cotton candy—full of hot air.”
“Are you sure you aren’t missing a few brain cells?” “Of course not!”
“When we’re together, it’s like WiFi: a strong connection.” “It’s more like 3G data, but alright.”
921 notes
·
View notes
As much as I would enjoy a kiss at their reunion, I do think the dragon prince crew would do something softer when (not if <-clown emoji) Sorvus is made canon. I'm picturing Corvus and Ezran and Callum arriving at the castle like in the promo image, them checking up with Opeli and she reveals everything is fine.
But Corvus asks about Soren. "Where is he?" he asks, his mind already wandering to the possibility that Soren...hadn't made it out. He will himself to remain strong for his king, but his body fills with dread. Thankfully, Opeli points him to the river.
There, Soren sits on the banks. Corvus sits beside him, noticing the same pained look in his eyes that he had seen on the ramparts the day Soren asked him to become a crownguard. Now, that same pain encompassed how he sat, how he stared mournfully into the waters.
Corvus asks is he is alright, and Soren can't even answer, holding back what emotion he can to maintain his cheerful attitude. He is failing miserably. Something more terrible than the Storm Spire must have happened. Something worse than Katolis burning down.
Corvus lays his hand over Soren's on the rock. Soren looks from it to Corvus, then shifts so that he can hold Corvus's hand back.
Like Janai and Amaya, its a confirmation.
and, of course, at the end of arc 2 or start of arc 3 (affirm affrim, manifest manifest, like to charge reblog to cast) then we get a kiss, teehee
108 notes
·
View notes