#after 4 long lonely years he's finally gotten his name cleared and has gotten an apology from the Nebulous Yard

[attaboy-art]

day 07: legacy

[Image ID: A darkly colored digital painting done with oil brushes of Alfendi Layton, from Layton Brothers Mystery Room, sitting at his desk in his office at dawn, as seen from the back corner of the room. He is sitting cross-legged with a cup of tea in his hands and he is blankly staring forwards. Behind him is a large window with the blinds half-down showing a grey dawn sky with mutliple buildings and Big Ben in within view. The same wall the window is on also has shelves, newspaper clippings, and a framed letter of apology addressed to Alfendi. In front of him is a messy desk with a lamp, a rotary phone, and a typewriter sitting on top, dimly shining in the light. /.End ID.]

[baoshan-sanren]

Chapter 29

of the wwx emperor au I’m thinking of calling Lan QiRen’s Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week oh god it’s only gonna get worse

Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 Part 1 | Chapter 8 Part 2 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 Part 1 | Chapter 15 Part 2 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 Part 1 | Chapter 22 Part 2 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 | Chapter 28

Wei Ying has watched the lanterns on every fifth night of his birthday festival for as long as he can remember.

His earliest memories are pale and indistinct, a collection of images and sounds, slithering through his fingers even as his grip tightens. The cold rooftop tiles under his hands, being lifted up onto his father’s shoulders, his mother’s delighted laughter. The Empress of the Shan Empire, a cool and dignified statue in the daylight hours, dancing over the moonlit roof peaks in her bare feet. Falling asleep in her lap while the lanterns drifted above, the soft murmur of his parents’ voices lulling him into sweet dreams.  

Eighteen years, and eighteen lantern festivals, but most of those he remembers clearly are filled with an ache of loss. He has often cursed his unreliable childhood memories, lamenting the cruelty of recollections that deny him access to those early years. Guilt usually follows after, as relentless as the passing of time. He has never had a cause to feel abandoned; not one festival has gone by where he was allowed to sink into despondency and isolation. Even on those years when copious amounts of wine were needed, his brothers had always been by his side, prepared to chase away the loneliness by any means necessary. Without Nie HuaiSang and Jiang Cheng, Wei Ying is certain that he would have grown twisted and warped by the loss, forever attempting to lean into the warmth that no longer existed. All that he is, and will still become, he owes to them. To shijie, to Wen Qing, to Wen Ning and A-Yuan.

But the easy, uncomplicated joy of watching the lights dance across the sky, that had gone away on his twelfth birthday. He had been convinced that it would never return. Not because of the loss, or the accompanying ache which had, over time, grown dull and heavy instead of sharp and bright, but because he believed it impossible, to feel a child’s joy once having reached adulthood.

There are many things he believed to be impossible before meeting Lan Zhan.

The outskirts of YiLing are sparsely populated to the east, a few sprawling farms and long pasture fields stretching between the town and the river. They have a small hill to themselves; the ground is still warm from the sun, the air saturated with the syrupy scent of the late autumn harvest, the fireflies rivaling the lanterns with their lights. They can hear the sounds of celebration from YiLing, but the noise is far away and muffled, barely penetrating the comfortable cocoon of silence between them.

Wei Ying’s little finger is hooked around Lan Zhan’s.

They are lying down, eyes locked on the sky. Wei Ying is sure that he will have grass and dirt in his hair, and probably a liberal smear of both on his robes. He is also sure that Lan Zhan’s hair and robes will be as pristine as they were before he cautiously stretched himself out by Wei Ying’s side.

Their shoulders are almost close enough to touch. Lan Zhan’s hand had trembled once, then settled into stillness. Wei Ying can hear him breathe, the rhythm slow and even. He thinks, if he were only to shift a little closer, if the din of YiLing were to fall quiet, perhaps he could hear Lan Zhan’s heart beating as well, and discern if it flutters as restlessly as his own.  

The touch is small and insignificant. Wei Ying has already held Lan Zhan’s hand in his own, had tangled their fingers together, had felt the warmth of his palm. But it does not feel small. The contact overshadows the lights above; a bright, single point of happiness that Wei Ying would give anything to keep.

“Lan Zhan,” he says.

“Mhm.”

Wei Ying bites his tongue.

It is not the lack of words that gives him pause. He possesses a river of words that relentlessly rushes whichever way it pleases, paying no mind to his intentions or wishes. He has had to learn how to dam this river; the Emperor must always take care of how he speaks, least he means to start a war with an offhand remark. But Lan Zhan is not a an overbearing sect leader, or a supplicant asking for favors. Nothing Wei Ying wants to say can ever be simple, because complexity is rooted in his birth, his status, his entire existence.

And yet.

What can be more simple than a feeling of emptiness finally filled, a sense of completeness, of irrevocable rightness?

Lan Zhan turns his head to look at him. There is a firefly hovering over his temple, a tiny burst of light traveling across a flawless cheek. In the gloom, his eyelashes seem thicker, his eyes black, their depth an endless abyss.

Wei Ying wants to look at him forever.    

“Lan Zhan, I really like you.”

The dark eyes widen, then immediately return to their study of the sky. Wei Ying watches his throat move, a heavy swallow that could mean anything at all. He cannot tell if there are words building behind the movement, and despite the obvious surprise in his gaze, as brief as it was, Lan Zhan’s expression has not changed.  

No, Wei Ying is wrong. It has changed.

There is a faint tremble to his eyelashes. The tips of his ears appear slightly darker. His throat moves again, but his mouth does not.

His little finger is still hooked around Wei Ying’s. It has not pulled away.

There is an entire language being spoken in front of Wei Ying’s eyes, but it is a language he does not yet understand. It is frustrating and painful to think, that he may never have an opportunity to learn, that Lan Zhan may not want him to know.

His future stretches in front of him, a lone seat on top of a dais, as decades endlessly melt into one another, seasons coming and going, favors given and taken away, a continuous tedium of birthdays, and festivals, and sect leader meetings. Lan Zhan nothing more than a cool and collected face, glimpsed twice a year among the sea of others, forever remaining a half-met stranger.

It is unbearable.

“Lan Zhan--“

“You are the Emperor,” Lan Zhan says, his voice stiff.

“Yes, but--“

“Young Master Lan!”

Startled, they both jerk upright, reaching for their swords.

“There you are,” an annoyed voice comes from the bottom of the hill, “if not for the Lan Sect funeral robes, I would have passed by this hill a dozen times.”

Wei Ying cannot make out the small shape climbing closer to them, but he recognizes the voice easily.

Lan Zhan has already gotten to his feet and moved back, placing himself a respectable distance away. Wei Ying was right. His hair and robes are as immaculate as they were before. Wei Ying, on the other hand, is pretty sure that he has grass sticking to his entire back.

“Why is it always you?” he snaps at the small disciple.

The boy, now close enough where he does not need to shout, offers him a sloppy bow and a disgruntled greeting.

“Your Majesty.”

“Your Majesty, Your Majesty” Wei Ying grumbles, “not two days ago you tried to bite me. I should have you tossed in the dungeons.”

“If it pleases Your Majesty,” the boy says, “this one would rather spend the night in the dungeon than traipsing through the YiLing countryside. Sect Leader Nie asks Your Majesty to meet him at the Lan Sect camp. There has been a development.”

“The Lan Sect camp?” he glances at Lan Zhan, but this time, the other boy’s face is truly unreadable.

“What is a Lan Sect camp? What development?”

“This one does not know,” the disciple says with exaggerated patience, “but if Your Majesty were to go there, I am sure it will all be made clear.”

Wei Ying ignores him.

“Lan Zhan, what is he talking about? What camp?”

Lan Zhan is silent for a few moments before he speaks, “The Lan Sect escort. The disciples that accompanied us to YiLing. There are no accommodations to be had in the town itself, so they have made camp on the outskirts.”

“Why?” Wei Ying asks, feeling bewildered, “all the other disciples are in the Immortal Mountain City. Why would you leave yours in YiLing?”

Lan Zhan’s throat moves again, but he does not need to speak. Wei Ying understands the moment the words have left his mouth.

They were not invited.

Uncle has always been the one to send out invitations, the Jiang Sect lotus prominently placed next to the Imperial Seal, his signature replacing Wei Ying’s, who could not be bothered with such minor formalities.

Fury rises in him for the second time that night, but this one is cold and already settled, not likely to wane any time soon.

“They will be coming with us,” he says, turning to head back down the hill.

What other small formalities have been left to Jiang FengMian over the years? Many more than Wei Ying can count; if he is to begin questioning his uncle’s methods, each must be addressed, reinspected, and altered if necessary.

This will take weeks. Possibly months.

Striding ahead, wishing he could kick something, he turns to the small disciple.

“Little beast, what is your name?”

The boy grimaces, but offers a half-bow, even sloppier than the one before, “This one is Nie XuanYu.”  

“Nie XuanYu,” Wei Ying says, “You have a bad temper and a terrible attitude. Try and pay attention to the Second Young Master, and you may yet learn how a disciple is supposed to behave.”

[osakaso5]

La Danse Macabre

Episode 40-2: Unheard Voices, Delivered Voices

Chapter Index

Three Years Later

Cura: Uuuugh!!!

Cura: Damn, I'm tired! These fights just won't end.

Rebellion Fighter: C'mon, Cura, there's no need to get mad.

Cura: I know. I just wish we had more people around here.

Cura: Nerve's been acting real suspicious lately. I have no idea what they're planning.

[Door opens]

Reue: Yawn... Now that was a good nap.

Cura: ........

Reue: Lately, I've been feeling just awful right before and after waking up. Maybe my age is starting to get the best of me.

Rebellion Fighter: G-good morning, sir.

Reue: Mornin'.

Cura: You DO realize that you're technically our second highest ranking member?

Reue: Well, if it isn't Mr. Top Dog. Hard at work as always, I see.

Cura: You should give working a chance yourself, Reue.

Reue: No thanks~. Libel promised me a job that requires as little effort as possible.

Cura: Ugh... You mean the asshole who went and died, right after making promises he didn't have to keep..?

Reue: Hahaha, you're such a jokester.

Rebellion Fighter: Cura! The transportation team from District 4 has run into a Unity Order patrol! They're requesting immediate backup!

Cura: What, seriously? Let's get 'em on the monitor.

Cura: This looks bad... Do we have any free squads nearby..?

Reue: Ah, I think we've got it covered.

Cura: Huh?

Reue: I thought this might happen, so I already sent over a certain someone. 

- - - -

Unity Order Troop: For the Church of Nerve... For Master Misericorde...

Rebellion Fighter: Crap... They've got us surrounded...

Unity Order Troop: For the Church of Nerve... For Master Misericorde...

Rebellion Fighter: I've sent an emergency signal to the base! But...

Rebellion Fighter: I don't think we're gonna make it...

Leiden: Hold up!!!

Rebellion Fighters: ......!?

Leiden: I came to save your asses!

Rebellion Fighter: ...Leiden!

Unity Order Troop: That's...

Unity Order Troop: One of the traitors...

Leiden: Hmm.

Leiden: ...Traitor, huh? Sure, I guess I am...

Leiden: And that's just fine by me. I've really thought this through, even with my empty head.

Unity Order Troop: Stay on guard...

Unity Order Troop: We all strike at the same time..! For the Church of Nerve!

Leiden: Yeah, come at me! I fight for myself!

Leiden: Because I'm Rebellion's Leiden!

Leiden: Don't you forget that!!!

- - - -

Cura: Oh, Leiden's going there. That's a relief...

Reue: Isn't it?

Cura: Fine, I guess you helped. ...But could you at least let me know  when you send out more troops?

Reue: Hahaha. When I notice an oversight in your orders, I can't help but want to fix it.

Cura: You sly old man...

Reue: Come to think of it, it's been around three years since Eternea died and Misericorde took over as the ruler of the church.

Reue: And because of Misericorde, the Unity Order is even more deeply tied to the church now.

Reue: Eternea must've been holding the church back.

Reue: The current Ark follows Misericorde's orders like a hive mind.

Reue: It'll be tough to bring them down. They've never been quite this fanatical before.

Cura: Yeah, they may not have a Celestial right now, but there's still an obvious gap between our technology and theirs.

Cura: Geez... It's gonna be a while before we overthrow them...

Reue: But we'll do it anyway, won't we? Create a world without Celestials.

Cura: Yep, that's what Libel would've wanted. And I decided to stick by him when we were both kids.

Reue: ...You've been doing well. The Surface's forces are concentrated around Rebellion more and more these days.

Reue: We've gotten new members too, haven't we? I'd say you've achieved more than plenty, for such a young man.

Cura: This much is nothing. I'm not nearly as charismatic as our old leader.

Reue: You're too humble. The world is already changing, and I'm sure it's for the better.

Cura: I sure hope so. Especially for all those of us who died for this change.

Horca: Hey... it's not healthy to let yourself be tied down by dead people. We're here for the living.

Reue: Oh, you came to visit, Mr. Merchant?

Cura: Done with your negotiations?

Horca: Yep, thanks so much. I'll be on my way now.

Cura: You're not ripping us off, are you?

Horca: ...Maybe I am, maybe not. Have a little faith in your subordinates, will you.

Cura: Well, for an old enemy, you sure have been a reliable business partner.

Reue: Right. I hear you even trade with Nerve these days.

Horca: I don't give a damn about the past. I'm just doing whatever I can to live a fun, free life.

Horca: I don't wanna hold myself back. That's not why I was born into this world, nor is it why I've survived this far.

Cura: ...I guess that's the life for you, then.

Horca: You guys have nothing to worry about. My motto is to sell everything at the same price, no matter who's buying.

Horca: I'm not making favors to any side. If I did, my old friends would just laugh at me.

Horca: ...I guess I'm tied down by the dead in my own way, too.

Cura: ...Nah. Neither of us are being tied down.

Cura: I'm doing this for Libel and Fuga because I want to.

Horca: ...That so. Well, either way, I’m  looking forward to this new world of yours.

Horca: Make sure that it’s a place  where even people like my old crew  can live.

Reue: ...Haha. Everyone's put their expectations on you.

Cura: What a pain. It's not like I asked for any of this.

Reue: It's the duty of those of us who lived.

Cura: ........

Cura: Oh, it's almost time. ...Get ready, people.

Reue: Oh, it is? I've been waiting for this.

Cura: Yeah, you better have. The kid's our ray of hope.

 - - - -

Qual: Arme. It's almost time. Are you good to go?

Arme: Yes, Qual. I'm ready.

Qual: ...You're not lonely? You haven't been around other people for quite the while now.

Arme: Hm? I'm fine. I have you... And Kabane and the others come see me every now and then.

Arme: Hmm, though I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel even a little bit lonely...

Arme: Cura and his troops are fighting their own fight, and I'm fighting mine.

Qual: I see...

Arme: For as long as I live, a new Celestial can't be born.

Arme: That grants Rebellion more than enough time to win us the world Libel longed for.

Qual: You've grown so strong.

Arme: Strong...

Arme: Qual, listen to me. I've decided something.

Arme: I want to help everyone live their lives.

Arme: However, I can't reach out to or help them in person.

Arme: Still, there may be those who would gain courage from me, even from afar.

Qual: ...Right, living on the Surface has made one thing very clear to me. Those who live in this world need something to believe in.  

Qual: The Surface is free. And that's why its people are afraid. They're anxious about the path they've chosen.

Qual: We could all use something to light up that path.

Arme: Right...

Arme: Libel said I'd bring everyone hope.

Qual: Yes, he did...

Arme: I was the Celestial. The symbol of everyone's faith. But no one saw me for who I truly am.

Arme: ...The truth is, I'm completely  useless. I'm weak, cowardly, naive,  and not very good at reading social  situations, or so I’ve been told. 

Arme: Which is why I'm not fit to lead a religion. I'm not some perfect idol.

Arme: I need others to help me. I need others to keep me from feeling down.

Arme: And in turn, I'll do whatever I can for them.

Arme: Anything to help others live their life to the fullest.

Arme: I want to be the light that shines upon this world.

[Beep]

Cura: Arme, you ready? I'm jacking into the Surface's radio signal. We’re  counting on you, as usual...

Arme: Yes, I'm ready as can be.

Cura: People were pretty suspicious about this at first, but you've gained kind of a fanbase as of late.

Arme: Ooh, really!?

Arme: Actually, I was thinking of learning how to sing and dance.

Cura: Hahaha, sounds good to me. I'm sure everyone will love it.

Cura: ...Just do your best, kid. And...

Cura: Make sure you enjoy this more than anyone else, alright?

Arme: Yes, I will! I'll have so much fun! 

- - - -

Horca: ...Doing it because you want to, huh.

Horca: Ugh, Cura's starting to rub off on me. And so, here I am... Visiting a grave.

Horca: ...It's my first time coming here since I left.

Horca: The Underworld... It really isn't a big deal at all. Just a huge, dumb hole.

Horca: ........

Horca: Ah. Vida, Placer. Is it okay if I just... pretend you're in there?

Horca: I...

Horca: Wanted to apologize. For not coming here sooner.

Horca: All I ever did was make fun of you for being bound to the dead.

Horca: ...But I was wrong. It's not a bad thing that I keep you guys in my memories.

Horca: It's not wrong of me to do something I think would make you happy.

Horca: ...Then again, I can't hear the dead.

Horca: You guys won't mind if I just assume you're happy that I'm still alive, will you?

Horca: ........

Horca: ...Well, you'd better not.

Horca: One of the perks to being alive is I get to pretend your souls in the afterlife agree with everything I do.

Horca: Hah... And if that's a problem, you'll just have to speak up.

[Bzzt]

Arme: Ah, ah.

Horca: Uagh!?

Horca: That scared the crap out of me... I really thought the dead were gonna talk for a second...

Horca: Huh? There's something coming from my transmitter..? Who is that..?

Arme: Cura? Can they hear me yet?

Horca: Whuh? 

- - - -

Arme: Ah, ah. Testing, testing.

Konoe: Oh, I've got a signal! It's starting, Master Kuon!

Kuon: Ah, how exciting.

Konoe: Kabane! Come over and listen with us!

Kabane: ...No. I can hear just fine from where I am.

Konoe: Darn!

Konoe: He's still acting distant... I thought you finally made up, after all these years?

Kuon: Ahaha. Kabane still has some trouble being around me.

Kuon: ...But he can take his time changing. We have an eternity ahead of us, after all. 

- - - -

Arme: Ahem.

Arme: All of you living your lives on the Surface, can you hear me?

Arme: My name is Arme.

Arme: Today, well...

Arme: Why don't I tell you how I met a dear friend, who changed my life? 

The End.

[octalove]

Back Then

(Batsis/Jason Todd/Dick Grayson)

Description: Reader’s little brother is having some trouble adjusting to his new life. Sad toward the end.

The sun was bashfully hiding behind some thin gray clouds, not unusual for any given afternoon. Leaning against my still-warm black Maybach 57, I tried not to grow impatient. “Maybe he joined an after school activity.” Dick mumbled through the Twix bar I’d picked up for him at the vending machine during lunch. He was sitting in the front seat, with the window rolled down, listening to Adele. I rolled my eyes, knowing full well that Jason Peter Todd would rather be skinned than join an after school activity. Still, though, Gotham Preparatory School for Boys had let out eleven minutes ago, and most of the other boys had gotten into their parent’s cars and sped away to their uptown abodes. Dick and I had come straight from Gotham Academy, punctual as usual, so as to avoid a folly of disapproving glares from dad and Alfred at dinner tonight. Where the hell was that kid?

“Maybe he ran away. Joined the circus.” Dick tried again. “Maybe I’m gonna put you in a circus.” “Back in a circus.” He corrected with a grin. Finally, at 4:15, Jason emerged from the school’s artfully carved wooden doors. His head was bowed, dark hair sticking up in all different directions, brow furrowed. He looked small in his school uniform, plaid socks and disheveled blazer. He hugged a book to his chest. A leathery hand lay on his shoulder, attached to a spindly man in his late 50’s, with receding salt and pepper hair, and golden oval glasses perched on his beak-like nose. I narrowed my eyes and crossed my arms, and upon spotting me, the man turned pale as a ghost, just as Jason looked up to reveal a purple bruise under his eye. He snapped his gaze back down. Dick quickly assessed the situation as well, and hopped out of the car, standing equal to me at a solid 5’8, but with all the toned muscle of a gymnast since walking age. We were about to play good cop bad cop- me, the polite, sophisticated elder sister who didn’t want to involve her egregiously powerful father, unless provoked by lack of cooperation, and Dick, the ill-tempered 15-year-old brother ready to raise hell if he didn’t get a good idea of what the fuck happened.

“Headmaster Ellison.” I said tersely, smoothing out my Gotham Academy uniform. I was thoroughly familiar with him from Dick’s days at the prep school- he’d called him Headmaster Hellison, and had a catalogue of grievances as long as his list of unfinished assignments.

“Ah, Miss Wayne. You look lovely today.” I had to steel my face into something vaguely agreeable, because even though it appeared he was the one afraid of me, I was 17 and in a schoolgirl skirt, and something about getting complimented by old men always skeeved me.

“What happened?” I cut right to the point, deciding small talk might soften my resolve, and I was in the mood for this to piss me off.

“Well, you see, we had a small incident today-“

“It’s okay! Can we go home?” Jason piped up abruptly and nervously, eyes pleading with me to let it go. Unfortunately, Waynes skewed toward long grudges.

“Come here, let me see.” I said more softly. Stiffly, Jason trudged across the neatly cut grass, still avoiding my eye. The bruise itself wasn’t bad, but I could tell it had just begun to bloom.

The Headmaster cleared his throat. “Jason has been encountering some problems with some of the other boys. This wouldn’t be the first incident, but it did escalate this time-“

“Not the first incident?” I clipped.

“It never got physical before, just some small verbal altercations that we easily handled.”

“Obviously they weren’t handled.” It was Dick’s turn to interrupt. It always struck me how he could make his voice go from lazily playful to stark and authoritative, biting off words almost as effectively as dad. Who needed Batman and Robin when Y/N Wayne and Dick Grayson were on the case?

“Please, can we just go? I’m okay, honest.” Jason begged, grabbing my hand and tugging just a little. His bronzed face was all swollen and puffy- not just from the fight. I could tell his eyes were rimmed with red. But he looked at me with all the determination and bravado of a street rat from Gotham, and my heart always bled for him in that regard. I sighed.

“Well, I have violin practice here shortly, Headmaster Ellison, so I’m going to take my brother home,” I bit off the brother part with a special zeal to emphasize that Jason Todd, no matter his name or background, was a Wayne, and I was his reminder. “And my father will be calling this evening to handle it once he gets off work.” Work that includes being able to liquidize this whole school right into his bank account in the time it takes to send an email.

“Get in, Jason.” I said. He did.

After a silent ride home, in which Dick tried to coax the full story out of an increasingly moody Jason, we arrived back at the manor whereupon I briefed Alfred, concerned, supportive, and called dad, exasperated, quiet. I let my little brother stew in his room until later that night, when I finally got tired of waiting him out and knocked on the door.

“Jaybird.” I cooed softly.

“…”

“Jay. If I open this door and you’re not there, I will set up the largest manhunt this city has ever witnessed.”

“I’m okay.” A quiet voice called back, sounding annoyed.

“May I come in?” I asked.

“…”

“…”

“Ok.”

I cracked the door open. He was balled up in his window nook, engrossed in a book. The room was dark, and he was reading with a flashlight, which was really unnecessary because he had about a dozen lamps, including a really cool lava lamp that Dick had gotten him. He’d changed out of his uniform and into pants and a hoodie, his hood pulled over with the strings pulled taut. He glanced down at the keys in my hand, narrowing his eyes.

“Come on.” I said.

“Where?”

“You haven’t eaten since you got home, kiddo.” His gaze fell askance. When it came to Jason, food was the way to ensure the answer was yes, whatever the question was.

“Can you bring me back something?” He grumbled quietly after a moment. I shook my head.

“I’m going to Sherman’s. Dine in only. One time offer.” I said with a smile. He frowned.

“I don’t wanna talk to Bruce.”

“Bruce isn’t coming. Just you and me. And we don’t even have to talk.” After some consideration, he pulled himself from his nook and brushed past me on his way out. I grinned to myself. Too easy.

Sherman’s Diner was the finest restaurant experience in Gotham City. The reflection of the neon lights skewed across puddles which danced with the drizzling rain. Fuchsia, cyan, lime green, red. Cracked white tiles and a sign with Sherman himself; a little plump chef man who, despite his jovial countenance and enthusiastic smile, appeared to be weeping tears of rust. Inside, the floor was unswept, the tables a bit sticky from all the no-show teenage staff of the payroll, and one of the lights above a lonely booth flickered. Jason loved it. The waitresses loved him.

“Come on in and sit down, hun, we’ll get ya some coffee!” A blonde woman called from behind the counter. One thing about Gothamites and Diners, black coffee was a 24/7 ordeal; 9pm on a school night was no exception. I let Jason pick the booth- he usually went for the same one, creature of habit that he was. We slid into the cool, torn red leather and neither of us needed to look at the menu. We sipped our coffees quietly for a while- Jason pretending to like it because it was the worldly thing to do. He’d never admit that he only started after he saw that dad and I always passed on sugar and cream.

It seemed our little evening standoff was going to bleed into the night. I took it as an opportunity to show him how patient I could be when necessary. The waitress- Darcy- set down a small slice of Oreo cake on the table. For him. Finally, he sighed, taking a bite of it.

“I hate school.” He mumbled.

“The school? Or the kids?” He didn’t answer. “What happened, Jay? Last week you loved school.”

“I like English.” He offered.

“Jason.” I said, leaning forward and folding my hands on the table. Food hadn’t worked. Patience was out the window. It was time to apply pressure. “If you don’t tell me who hit you, I, on my honor as a Wayne, am obligated to track down every snotty little boy who ever set foot in Gotham Prep and hit their snotty little faces to see how they like it.”

Jason’s lips tugged into a smile, which he fought, and eventually lost. So he hid it behind his cake. But after a minute, his smile fell. Something else crossed his face and he looked out the window.

“I hit first.” He said quietly. Solemnly. I blinked at him, surprised.

“You did?”

“Yeah. Jared Mullins. I hit him first.”

“Why?”

He sniffed, furrowing his brow to try and fool me into believing he was something tougher than a ten year old boy. Maybe he was. Tougher than the likes of whoever the hell Jared Mullins was. “He said…”

I waited.

“He said I was poor. Said I don’t belong at the school. That Bruce only took me in cause he felt sorry for me.”

“Sounds like he deserved to get hit.” I sipped my coffee. He didn’t smile again. A beat passed in its place.

“I don’t know why I hit him.”

“Because it was a stupid thing to say.” He shook his head.

“That’s not it. He was right.”

My heart fluttered in my chest. “Jason! The fuck he was. You know that’s not true.” Alfred would’ve been appalled to have me cuss in front of him, as if it wasn’t a large majority of his vocabulary since before he came to the manor.

“You don’t get it.” He said, eyes glued to the rain on the window. “You’re his daughter. His real daughter.”

“And Dick isn’t his real son?” Dick was usually the one to advise him when his legitimacy came into question, not me. Because in truth, I didn’t understand. Jason didn’t answer the question. A plate of chicken tenders and fries appeared, but they went untouched.

“Look at me please.” He did.

“It doesn’t matter that you’re not dad’s real son. And it definitely doesn’t matter that Jared whoever the hell thinks so or not. Dad took you in because of who you are, and everything you’re going to be. You belong in this family and wherever else you go, because you’re worthy of everything Gotham has to offer- and more.”

Jason’s face crumpled a little before he composed himself, blinking fast and wrestling with the emotion. He didn’t say thanks, but that was thanks enough.

“Hey. Did you see how scared Headmaster Hellison was?” I asked smugly.

A small smile. “Yeah.”

“That’s because you’re one of us. And we scare the piss out of people like him and Jared Mullins. Cause we’re a damn good family.”

Jason smiled at me. “Yeah. I guess we are.”

*

People like us

I watched- all I could do was watch. There was no way in hell I could stop him. The Jason that stood before me was 6’3 and impenetrable. Even if I thought I could get the gun from his hand, I wasn’t going to save anyone. The only thing about himself he kept when he drug himself out of the grave was his stubborn conviction. Anyone he wanted dead would wind up that way.

Scare the piss out of people like him.

The man let out a guttural, desperate noise as he tried to crawl away, pale as a ghost as Jason stood over him. He was a criminal, to be sure, but not one willing to die for his trade. Evidently, that wasn’t enough.

Cause we’re a damn good family.

“Red Hood! Stand down, now.” Batman’s voice snarled, echoing off of the concrete walls and floor. I flinched. Jason didn’t. A single shot, blood spatter, all the rest. His red monochrome helmet was on the ground, black hair all mussed and disheveled from the fight. A bruise was blooming under his eye.

His gaze flicked up, landing on me. Any trace, any remnant of my brother was gone. The man who came back was a dejected, solemn thing, who carried this dark look in his eye and looked like he could eat me whole. I tried to convey something to him with my eyes. It didn’t appear to take effect.

“You’re late to the party.” His voice rumbled in his chest, and he turned his attention to Batman.

I tried not to let my voice shake as I stepped forward.

“We’re here now.” I said.

His jaw clenched at the sound of my voice. Something grim passed his features.

“Yeah. I guess we are.”

[bh7theseriesblog]

The Origins of Big Hero 7

Big Hero 7: The Series

Origins

*A flicker of black and white starts up for a while, static noises barely blocks out a voice*

Umm…Hello? Can you hear me?

*the flickering and static stops as it shows a 14 year old girl with dyed blue hair and purple eye contacts*

Can you hear me? Oh it's working!

*The girl sits on the chair in front of the camera. She smooths out her sea green skirt as she clears her throat*

Hi! So…after some thinking I decided to make a video diary so I can remember what I said. After all, who knows when it'll come in handy right? Oh right! I forgot to introduce myself! My name is Cora Mizichio.

*Cora chuckles slightly before continuing*

So I guess I should start with my life and such. Let me warn you though, it's kind of a long and wild story.

*she pulls out a phone and starts showing pictures*

I have lived in San Fransokyo for my whole life with my Dad, Mizuchi and Grandmama, Kaguya. My mom, Akemi passed away when I was a baby.

*image of a blonde hair woman smiled warmly before switching to Cora and her family. Her father being Goliath in stature and her grandmother dressed in a kimono with a cane*

Then my family found out that I'm incredibly intelligent for my age. I suppose hacking into your father's computer to send a birthday card at the age of 4 does that. My Dad is very sweet and an old softie, but is very protective of me and wasn't sure that I should go to school. So I was homeschooled, it was fun being taught by Grandmama and such about Marine biology, but…I felt kind of lonely…

After all my studies, I actually made a habit of bot fighting disguised as an unknown cat-masked competitor under the name 'Nekodomo'. It earned good money since at the time Dad hadn't gotten any luck with jobs due to his height. But it was my very first night of bot fighting that I met him…Hiro Hamada

*she flips the photo to a young Asian boy her age, with messy raven hair, large almond brown eyes and a tooth gap in his smile.*

I've never had very much luck when it came to making or having friends, so if I someone told me that I would end up dating this guy I would had laughed. But yeah we did. I was paired up with Hiro in one of those special bot fighting events like the duo duel. We won, but than the cops were coming and I was so scared of getting caught that I couldn't move. But then the next thing I know Hiro grabs my hand and we were running like crazy before the cops even spot us! I have no idea how long we had been running, but to be honest I didn't really care because I was still awe-struck by the fact that Hiro had save me from getting arrested and we didn't even know each other at the time. But that was all about to change, because as we were finally approaching a safe distance from the cops, it was at that moment where I tripped and fell flat on my face, and at the same time broke my mask. Thankfully Hiro picked me back up and we started running again, with me leaving my broken mask behind. Once we finally stopped and knew we were safe, that was when Hiro and I actually first met face-to-face. Now I have to be honest with you, I've never really known if the whole 'Love at first sight' thing was actually real or not, but it's the only thing I can describe how I felt when I first looked into Hiro's eyes. It was there when we properly introduced ourselves to each other and after that, we started seeing each other more. And it was only after 4 months of hanging out together, that I finally got to meet his family, and he got to meet mine.

*The picture now showed Hiro with a woman holding a calico japanese bobtail cat and a young man on either side of him.*

The woman on his left is his Aunt Cass, she runs a coffee shop called the Lucky Cat Cafe. The young man on his right is his older brother Tadashi. And the adorably cute kitty-cat Aunt Cass is holding is Mochi, their family pet. They are really cool people, and they always asked how I was doing and such, and Mochi is such a sweet kitty that he always tries to cuddle up to me whenever I come over. Hiro and I actually became an official thing one night when I saved his butt from Yama's minions. And boy were they surprised! Aunt Cass actually bounced when Hiro told them that I'm his girlfriend! Dad and Grandmama met them that night too, while dad wasn't too happy at first about me dating, Grandmama convinced him…after hitting him on the head with her cane.

*Cora giggled at the memory*

Anyway, After a slight misadventure where Hiro and Tadashi landed in jail and Cass had to bail them out, Tadashi actually took Hiro to SFIT, San Fransokyo institute of Technology that same night. Hiro told me that he met Tadashi's friends. There's Gogo: the cool biker chick, Honey Lemon: the stylish Chem genius, Wasabi: Laser neat freak, and Fred: the secret Billionaire super hero geek. Afterwards Hiro and I actually applied to SFIT by entering the showcase! Hiro made these miniature robots he called Microbots which he can control via head transmitter, I on the other hand did super strength suction cup shoes that can stick on any surface. We both won and we…were gonna celebrate until…a huge fire broke out in the showcase building and Tadashi ran back inside to help Callaghan, a teacher at the school….he didn't make it…

*Cora turned quiet, looking at her hands as she takes a deep breath*

Hiro wasn't himself for a while. I visited him a lot since the fire, and I mostly talked and tried to comfort and be there for him. Then came the day Hiro stubbed his toe and Baymax came along.

*A picture of a white inflated figure came to the picture*

Baymax was Tadashi's project, a robotic nurse to be more specific. He heard Hiro say ow and activated to help him. Then one of Hiro's microbots started acting weird, and Baymax followed the direction it went! It was then we found a guy in a kabuki mask controlling the Microbots. But they were destroyed at the fire right? Once Hiro pieced together that it was the kabuki-masked man that started the fire to steal them, which in turned killed Tadashi…Hiro decided to build Baymax some armor which…well

*the next picture showed Baymax in protective gear*

We traveled down to the port where we saw him take some type of machine out of the ocean. But then it turns out Baymax called the gang to help us, but sadly the guy in the mask saw us. We barely escaped with our lives that night! Thankfully Baymax being a walking marshmallow, also makes him an inflatable raft too. Afterwards we got to Fred's mansion and discussed over what to do next. Side note: it was weird to see that Fred is a billionaire.

*shows portrait of a young Fred and his parents in classy attire*

Hiro and I then built ourselves armor to fight the guy in the mask. Honey lemon got this cute chemistry purse to pull out what she needed, Gogo got some sick skates to zoom past us, Fred got a killer Kaiju costume that breaths fire, Wasabi got awesome laser blades on the backs of his hands, and I got my aquatic camouflage suit with squid strength suction cup shoes! And learning back from his previous work, Hiro turned Baymax from a stay puff marshmallow with bicycle gear to an awesome superhero!

*the next photo shows Baymax in his red armor*

After training and flying around the city we got down to business. We flew to Akuma island where the masked guy was, and it was there we learned something interesting. Krei and some government officials had something called 'Project Silent Sparrow'. It backfired when the portal sucked everything in, and the pilot was stuck. But then the masked guy attacked us! We tried to fight back but….

*a small clip showed Fred jumping only to be punched away *

We bombed, big time.

Hiro and I got lucky to get the mask…but the person was not who we thought….

Turns out Callaghan grabbed the transmitter and used it and the Microbots to protect himself in the fire…leaving Tadashi to die….

It was then that Hiro took out Baymax's health care chip and ordered him to kill Callaghan…

*Cora took a deep breathe before standing up and leaving the room, she returned back with a glass of water and started drinking it. Once she was done She then continued.*

Thankfully the gang got Baymax back to normal but Hiro was furious. He just left with Baymax…but we eventually met up with Hiro at his place, with a video of Tadashi…it was also when we showed him what we discovered. The pilot was no random person Krei hired. She was Callaghan's daughter, and Callaghan was out for blood.

We got to Krei Tech where Callaghan got his portal running. Hiro then learned what we needed to do to beat him; instead of the mask, we take out the Microbots, then he'd be powerless. But despite that, the portal was still open, and ready to tear itself to pieces. Then Baymax dropped the biggest bomb on us, Callaghan's daughter was still alive in there.

Hiro and I got on Baymax to rescue her. We found her pod but Baymax's thrusters were wrecked from the debris…

Baymax…he got us out by rocket punch…but stayed behind in the portal…

It's been weeks since then…

Krei agreed to keep our identities a secret, Callaghan is in prison, and his daughter is making a steady recovery at the hospital. And the news had been exploding over 'the mysterious group of heroes' that saved the city.

Hiro and I had been doing good, we talked to the gang a lot and we actually reapplied to SFIT again.

*Cora then looks at the clock beside her and gasped*

Oh man it's almost midnight! And first day of class is tomorrow! Anyway, thank you for listening! And…Baymax…I don't know if you can hear me..but Hiro has been doing good. We all miss you…especially me and Hiro...wish us good luck, cause who knows what happens tomorrow.

*Cora smiles at the camera before turning it off.*

A.N: This is an updated look for the prolouge chapter of Big Hero 7: The Series!

Liking the new visuals? ;3

This chapter has been edited by WolfWitchHuntress1318 at Fanfiction.net! Thank you for being my patient editor! Thank you for following and reading Big Hero 7! Love ya!

[mydearestreaderfanfics]

Rather Be (Keith x Reader)

Warnings: swearing, alcohol, pining, light angst (with a happy ending)

Word Count: 4,858

Prompt/Request: wb an imagine with my boy keef and a childhood best friend crush,, bonus for blushy flustered keef lmao

Summary: An old promise from their childhood brings back old feelings. When both Keith and the reader fail to communicate, though, will the promises from the past be kept?

Author's Note: Rather Be by Clean Bandit is the musical accompaniment for this fic. What do you guys think, should I add on a song for all fics/fic requests?

Author: Mod Alex

“Keef!”

The young boy dropped his toys and turned around to see his best friend. Although he’d never admit it, he loved the way they mispronounced his name, it was… cute. “(Y/n)! What are you doing here?”

“I came to make a deal.” You held out a paper to him, an adorably serious look on your face.

“A deal?” He took the paper, looking over the crayon written words. The writing was messy and mistake-ridden, but it didn’t matter to Keith, what mattered was that it was a proposal to Keith, a marriage proposal.

“You are my bestest friend ever. So, I’ve decided that if I’m not already married in twenty years, which is like a million years away anyway, then we should get married.”

Keith’s surprise turned into a smile which turned into a laugh. “(Y/N), you’re only 7-”

“And a half! You're only 4 months older anyway, I’m basically 8 like you!”

“Okay, you’re 7 and a half, but shouldn’t you wait until you're older to get married.”

“I am, didn’t you read it? It says 20 years away,” you pointed at a large blue 20, “see? Right there.” You huffed crossing your arms and looking down, your serious face crumbling as you toed at the dirt.

“Okay.” Keith figured if he did want to marry someone one day it should be you.

“Okay?” You looked up, failing to mask your surprise.

“Yup. Oh, I think we need to sign this, right?”

“Oh, right!’ You fished two crayons out of your pocket, handing him the red one, and keeping your favorite colored one for yourself. After setting the paper on the sandbox’s lining you both signed, sealing a contract that would be forgotten for a long time. 19 years to be exact.

-

You were going through some old things of yours (your parents had asked you to come home to see what you wanted to keep and what you wanted to toss as they needed your old room cleared since they were planning on moving). As you were in the process of going through your childhood stuff, you stumbled across your old treasure chest filled with drawings, toys, and crumpled at the very bottom-- a wedding certificate. You laughed as you pulled it out, flattening it as best as you could. Keith absolutely had to see this. After tugging out your phone you sent him a quick message to hurry over.

Keith got there not even twenty minutes later looking for you somewhat panicked. After an apology and a brief explanation, he calmed down. Actually, he was pretty amused. “I can’t believe you told me I was going to marry you.”

“Hey! You’re the one that agreed.” The both of you were laughing as Keith looked over the paper.

“According to this, we’re supposed to get married in a couple weeks.” Keith grinned at you, blushing slightly from what you assumed was second-hand embarrassment from your younger selves.

“Oh gosh, so it does.” Your giggle fit picked up again, as you continued to speak through it. “Guess we have to get married. A contract is a contract, as they say.”

“I’ve never heard that saying, I’m not entirely convinced you didn’t just make that up.”

You held your hand to your chest, barely containing your grin. “Are you, Keith Kogane, saying I’m making things up?”

“Oh absolutely.” He smiled, not even trying to hide his smile.

You gasped dramatically. “How rude.” The paper in your hand caught your attention once more. “Why did you sign it? Way back then, I mean.”

“Why?” Keith took the paper from you, smoothing out some of the worst folds and eyeing it fondly. “How could I not? You came up to me that day and I vaguely remember feeling intimidated-“

“What?! By me?! Your friend?!”

“Well, sure. You came up to me holding this sheet of stark white printer paper- which has seen better days now, but back then it looked official-“

“Kind of what I was going for,” you laughed.

“Right. So any way you come marching up with an official-looking piece of paper and then basically declare that you were going to marry me. And I was intimidated. I mean there was this person I liked-“ Keith fumbled over his words, speaking more quickly after his accidental confession, “and they were asking me to marry them. It was a time of very strong intimidation.” He laughed awkwardly, hoping you hadn’t caught his blunder. “Anyway what are you going to do with this?”

“Wait! You liked me?!”

“I- um- yeah…” He fiddled with the edge of the paper before handing it back to you, noticeably uncomfortable.

“Wow.” The word came out as more of a sound than an actual statement. “I’m just- I can’t believe it. I guess since we signed this I’ll have to keep it. Just, y'know, in case I don’t fall madly in love with some rando within the next three weeks.” You spoke clearly, although your voice did have a slightly teasing tone. It wasn’t mean, though, far from it, if anything it sounded kind of flirty. You hoped Keith understood you were being genuine.

He flushed. “Yeah, maybe… Hey, I’ve got to head out, Shiro’s having this thing and he asked me to go. I’ll see you later?”

“Sounds good. Maybe Sal’s tonight?”

“Sure.” Keith grabbed his bag and basically bounded out of the room, face aflame.

You felt a little guilty about flustering him so much, but really you were feeling quite overwhelmed yourself. Keith and you’d been friends since basically the day you were born and yeah, you’d had a crush on him, and yeah, maybe you still did. But you couldn’t just come out with it. Besides, there was no way he liked you still anyway. You’d gotten a rise out of him for your own amusement (and maybe to see if he still had feelings for you), but you were certain it was just his embarrassment at the situation that made him so flustered. You were a little crushed, to be honest. To be completely truthful you wanted to do nothing more than bottle your feelings up and binge video games all night to forget the awkwardness you’d just set in place, but no, you had already asked Keith to meet you at Sal’s.

-

By the time evening rolled around and it was time to head to Sal’s you had worked yourself into a pit of guilt and regret. Keith wasn’t there when you got there. So you took up residence in the lone booth at the back where the two of you usually sat. Ten minutes had passed before you saw your friends Shiro and Matt walk in. Keith still wasn’t here so you waved them over. They seemed happy enough to see you, you were happy to see them too, even if you had been hoping they had Keith with them. They didn’t.

“(N/n), hey! Is Keith with you?” Shiro grinned, leaning down to side hug you before sliding in opposite you. Matt slid in next to you pulling you into a hug that quickly became a noogie.

“Gah! Matt what the hell, what are you five?” You shoved away from him, giving him the bird as you turned back to Shiro. “No, he was supposed to meet me here like half an hour ago, I thought maybe he was with you.”

“I haven’t seen him since this afternoon.”

“Shit. Did he seriously stand me up?”

“Oh? Did you two finally confess your undying love for each other? And here I thought we had something, (N/n).” Matt lounged against you and you grumbled despite smiling at the dramatic man.

“First of all shut your mouth. Second of all, you know you’re the only one for me.” Shiro barked with laughter and Matt nuzzled in closer to you and you rolled your eyes playfully at the act. “Jesus, you’re being worse than usual, are you drunk?”

“He’s got a buzz.”

“Ah. That makes sense then. Matt, my darling lover, I need you to get your bony ass elbow out from my rib cage.” He laughed as he sat back up.

Though he had been smiling at the antics of his friends only moments prior, Shiro was quick to take up the serious role. “Wait, so you haven’t seen Keith since this morning.” You nodded. “Did something happen between the two of you?”

You flushed, this was the conversation you were hoping wasn’t going to happen. Still, you couldn’t lie to Shiro, the man was pretty much a human lie detector to his friends. “Kind of… I found this dumb thing from when we were kids this morning and I think it upset him.”

Shiro cocked his head to the side. “But Keith loves looking through things from your guy’s childhood.”

“Well, I think maybe it was more so what I said about it. I may have been a bit out of line with my joking.”

“What’d you say?” Math looked at you, eyes widened.

You buried your head in your hands to hide your face. “I may have implied we should get married.” Both Matt and Shiro broke into a fit of laughter at your expense and you groaned. “Guys shut up! Look I didn’t know what else to do, he told me he used to have feelings for me and I guess I was just feeling bold. I’ve been beating myself up for it all day.”

Shiro caught his breath, quietening his chuckles momentarily. “He told you that? And I assume it’s safe to say that you're referring to the fake proposal back in- oh gosh, I want to say first, maybe kindergarten?”

“Second-grade, and yeah. I mean, what would you do? You know how I feel about Keith and it was like he was saying the very thing I wanted to hear for basically all of my life and then he bails the second I reciprocate. The only thing I can think is that I fucked up, which honestly let's be real, is probably the case. And now he’s uncomfortable around me, and I don’t know what to do.”

Shiro blinked, face going slack. “Oh, wow. Okay. I can’t believe he actually told you. I don’t think you scared him off, (N/n), I think maybe he wasn’t expecting you to say anything like that and he didn’t know how to handle it. I’m sure if you give him time he’ll work it out himself. Until then you need to stop beating yourself up over it.”

“Easier said than done.” You crossed your arms, slumping in your seat.

“I know, but you’re going to have to trust me on this one.”

-

Keith had never shown up to Sal’s and honestly now that a few days had passed with him one wording you, Shiro's advice was getting harder and harder to follow. You were in your apartment, putting everything from your old room away when you stumbled across the object that caused this whole situation. You crumpled it, tossing it aside. “As if I needed the reminder.” Your birthday was rapidly approaching, with only little over a week left until the day. It was supposed to be a joyous occasion, but it only served as a reminder that Keith was avoiding you. You glared at the piece of paper laying crumpled pathetically at the floor. A sigh escaped you and you sunk to the floor, grabbing it again. It hurt sure, but you felt bad just tossing it aside like that. Why couldn’t life be as easy as you thought it would be all those years ago? You’d always loved Keith, that much should have been obvious from your proposal. But the idea that your feelings had been reciprocated and that they may not be anymore crushed you; even more than that, the idea that you’d ruined your friendship with Keith completely wrecked you. Even if you couldn’t have him as your significant other, you would always want to be friends; he was your other half.

Your phone rang and you jumped, startled by the sudden noise. The caller ID said it was Matt. Decline. You just couldn’t deal with his silliness right now. The phone rang again and you were irked to see Matt’s face pop up again. Decline. You pressed down on the screen as if the more aggressive action would keep him from calling again. A moment later a message popped up. It was from Matt.

Answer my call D:

You rolled your eyes. A second later the phone started buzzing again. You slid the answer button, annoyance written in your words as you clipped out a curt “What?”.

“About time, I was wondering if I’d have to come to your house to tell you.”

“Tell me what?!”

“Now, now. Is that any way to talk to someone with good news?” His voice was a singsong that only proved to grate on your nerves further.

“You know what, I don’t care.”

His laughter faded. “Okay, okay, sorry. Yeesh, this whole thing has really gotten to you, hasn’t it?” He was quick to take on a more empathetic tone, it was much appreciated on your end.

“I’m sorry, I’m being kind of an ass, aren't I? But, yeah, it has. Anyway, what was your news?”

“Shiro has a surprise for you!”

“Wait, what?”

“Can you meet us at his place?”

“Yeah-- wait, Matt, what’s the surprise?”

“It wouldn’t be a surprise if I told you, now would it?” You tried to speak again, but the line went dead. He’d hung up.

You wanted to ignore the phone call, but you know if you did the curiosity would linger much longer than you’d like. So instead, you huffily slipped on your jacket and shoes and headed out to Shiro’s place.

For having a surprise for you, Shiro wasn’t very quick to answer his door. When he finally did open the door he was red in the face and looked like he had just been running laps. You guffawed. “Are you good?” Too breathless to answer, he just nodded, stepping aside to let you in. “What were you doing-- the hell is this?”

“Oh that, that’s nothing. You look great, but hey have you thought about going out, like with us?” You blinked slowly at Matt who was trying to pull your attention from reusable grocery bags that were spilling out streamers and other various decorations.

“What are you talking about?”

“We’re going to go party and you’re coming with us. No more moping. But maybe you might want to get a little more dressed up, that’s on me, I should have told you before. I was just worried you wouldn’t show up.”

"I wouldn’t have. Matt, I don’t want to go out partying. Besides you’re a little early, my birthday isn’t for-”

“We know! But you needed a pick me up, look it won’t be one of those shitty bars, okay. Somewhere more laid back.”

You rolled your eyes again. “What's wrong with what I have on now then?”

“Pwetty pwease. Look, we even bought you a gift!”

Matt pulled out a nicely wrapped gift box, Shiro must have wrapped it.

“Go on, open it.”

So you did, pulling the ribbon and tearing the paper off. Inside the box was an outfit, and despite your earlier protests, you smiled. It was a number you’d been eyeing for a while now. “Thank you both. Fine. We can go party, but just for a little while. Let me go get ready first, yeah?”

“Sounds good.”

-

The place they ended up taking you was Oriande, a place that landed somewhere between a club and a bar. It was classier than most of the bars on the road, but it also still had a dance floor giving it a more casual atmosphere as opposed to the high-class lounges up the road. It was still early in the evening, the sun just barely touching the horizon when you went in. Pastel neon lights engulfed you, the soft yet bright pinks blues and purples inviting you deeper into the establishment. Honestly, you were surprised you hadn’t been here before, it was just your style. Shiro ushered you over to a table nearer the back that looked like it had been decorated for an event. Oh, dang, were you here for someone else's party? But you didn’t even bring anything-

A cheery lady approached you. “You must be one of our bachelorxs!” She clapped a hand on you back and before you could get a word in edgewise she continued. “Now, your hubby-to-be isn't here yet, but that doesn’t mean the fun can't begin right?” She laughed friendly, before continuing, barely a breath in between her last sentence. “So," she stretched out the 'o' so that it sounded more like 'ooh', "we’ve set up a nice little bar section for your party, and of course since it's your party there's an open bar. Your planners were very thorough! If you need anything just holler!” And like that she had run off to attend other matters.

You rounded on your friends who were looking particularly guilty. “What the hell did you do!?”

“Look before you say anything-”

“No. I-” You pinched the bridge of your nose. “I get that you wanted the discount or special treatment or whatever, but did you really have to rope me in?”

“Well actually-”

“Shiro? Why’d you ask me to meet you here? Isn’t it kind of loud--...” There was Keith looking a little worse for the wear than when you’d last seen him, but he had still cleaned up well. Your attention immediately left Shiro.

“Keith?” His face paled as you approached him, eyes darting away as if searching from an exit; your heart clenched painfully. When he realized he couldn't so easily dart away he begrudgingly looked up at you, face a soft pink, although it might have just been the lighting-- it was hard to tell.

“(Y/n)... Hey…”

“It’s nice to see you again.” Even though you don’t want to see me, you thought bitterly. “Did Shiro invite you? It looks like it’s somebody’s party.” This caught him off guard.

“I... it is?”

You shrugged. “I’m assuming, although I think Shiro,” You yanked the fleeing man over, grip iron clad on his arm, Matt had already made his getaway, “and Matthew are running a bit of a con, but there are free drinks so...”

“Oh, my gosh, you two are so cu~ute! You must be our bachelor, I'm sure your fiance must have filled you in, so if you need anything let me know. I’ll let the bartender know that you’re both here.”

You watched in mortification as the chipper woman from before clapped a hand on Keith’s shoulder, effectively labeling him as your fiance. His face was burning with a blush, you were certain it wasn't the lighting this time. “No- that’s not--”

“Berry! We got an issue!” Someone from behind the bar shouted at who you assumed was the chipper lady. She frowned. “Shoot. Sorry, I gotta go handle this, enjoy your party!” Your anger from before you saw Keith had been reignited with a vengeance.

“Okay, so maybe I should explain…” Shiro looked beyond nervous.

“You think?!”

“It was Matt’s idea. Well, okay so originally we thought maybe we could pretend to be getting engaged for a couple of free drinks but then you two… well, you’ve both been a mess and refused to confront each other… So Matt came up with this idea, which in hindsight is kind of a shitty one, but hey now you can talk and there's plenty of pre-paid liquid courage to help you.”

“Shiro!”

“I’m sorry that we put you in this situation, but I’m not sorry I tricked you both into coming. Who knows how long you two would’ve gone on avoiding each other? And I can't deal with you both being upset over the same thing just because you don't want to confront each other. You both have been beating yourselves up, and waiting around for the situation to just magically right itself. So if it takes alcohol to get you to talk, then so be it." Shiro had taken on that authoritative aura of his and you huffed. You hated it when he was right, and he usually was.

"Fine." Your voice sounded cold even to your ears. You hadn’t meant for it to and you couldn't stand the thought of seeing if Keith reacted to it. Honestly, you weren't sure if it would hurt more if he did or didn't. Instead of looking you stubbornly grabbed his hand and dragged him to somewhere you could talk without shouting. You ended up finding yourselves alone in the hallway to the restroom, the music was still blaring but it was far enough away that you could actually talk. You finally let go of Keith’s hand, turning around to face him. It was almost too much, after so many days of having been rejected by him. Your nerves gripped you with a renewed sense of terror. You couldn’t talk, instead, you felt your throat tighten. Fuck. You were gonna cry. You hadn’t dragged him all the way over here just to cry in front of him. A strained whimper left your lips when you made to speak and you quickly snapped your mouth shut, turning away in embarrassment. Why now, of all times did your emotions have to be getting the better of you.

A shaky hand wiped your tears away. Your eyes shot to meet Keith’s. He looked unsure of himself like he would dart away at any second and yet, he still stood before you, gently brushing away the tears that refused to stop flowing. “H-hey, (N/n), hey… No, no, fuck. Shit. I’m sorry. I didn’t-- I didn’t mean to make you cry.” That only made you cry harder and soon enough Keith had awkwardly pulled you into his arms. It was no unknown fact that physical affection was one of the quickest ways to comfort you and as your childhood best friend, Keith knew this better than anyone. “I,” He cleared his throat, “I know I fucked up. I never wanted to hurt you. I’d rather die.” He paused and for a moment you thought that he was done talking and tried to focus on recomposing yourself. You never left his arms though, afraid that stepping away would mean you’d never get to be this close to him again. “But I- I didn’t know what to do… I was scared. My feelings for you were laid out and I couldn’t be sure what you were thinking.” Something wet hit the top of your head-- Keith was crying too? “So, I did what I do best and I ran away. I shouldn’t have, but… What else was I supposed to do?” His voice wavered, his question coming out near breathless and timorous.

“I don’t understand? Why were you scared? I don’t care if you used to have a crush on me as a kid! I’m sorry if I scared you off with that stupid comment, I just… I don’t know. I thought maybe…” You had pushed back, this wasn’t a conversation you could very well have with your face smooshed into Keith’s chest. Regret clenched around your heart like a chain, but you’d already froze before. You forced yourself to meet his eyes, the beautiful violet-grey causing a short-lived wave of calm to wash over you. They were familiar, and yet the tears falling from them were not. Keith rarely cried. Acting on instinct alone, your hands made to wipe his tears away. He let you, watching you with a piercing gaze that was trying to dissect your every movement, find answers in the space between your words and your actions. He couldn’t find any hidden meanings, but he couldn't find any answers either.

“Comment?”

“What?” Your voice croaked out, sounding just as confused as he had.

“You said stupid comment? What comment?” Was he serious? Hadn’t your flirting been what caused this all to spiral?

“When I was flirting with you! Isn’t that what ran you off? I mean I didn’t actually mean we had to get married, just like a date or- or whatever…”

“Wait you were flirting with me?!” You felt like screaming, how had you managed to get yourself into this predicament of giving Keith your feelings on a platter thrice in your life now? Regardless of whether he knew or not, you felt like vomiting from the nerves.

“I thought it was obvious?” You laughed, but it came out strange and garbled, “I mean, shit Keith, I only propositioned you for marriage twice now.” The idea was both incredibly embarrassing and way too funny.

He seemed to feel similarly as a snort left him, quickly preceded by a fit of laughter that you too couldn't help but join in on. The both of you sounded delirious, and honestly, you kind of were. Tears flowed freely as you laughed, making you feel as though you may have lost it. When the laughter finally died down you were left shaky and almost numb. But the weight was no longer on your shoulders so that was something. “In your defense,” Keith’s hands had come to wipe away your tears again, completely dismissing his own, “I’ve technically never refused your propositions either.”

Your hand met his on your cheek, stopping the motions but also stopping him from leaving. “I mean, you did run away the second time…”

“But I never said no.”

“Are you saying you want to marry me?” Your brow arched, eyes searching his for a sign that he was joking. Surely, he wasn’t actually saying he wanted to marry you.

His eyes widened and he glanced to the side bashfully. “Maybe not a week from now… Honestly, though, I don’t think I could ever even imagine myself spending the rest of my life with anyone else? Like you’ve been my constant since basically day one and I’ve… I’ve had feelings for you for almost as long.” You could feel the tremble of his hands, letting your grip tighten slightly afraid he might run again if you didn’t. Your other hand moved to press his ridiculous fringe out of his eyes.

“Oh, Keith.” You couldn’t help the soft smile that found its way to your lips. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

He bit his lip. “That depends on what you think I’m saying?”

“Keith… Please don’t make me wait any longer to hear it.”

He laughed, although you could still feel the slight tremble in his hand. “(Y/n) (L/n), I have wanted to be with you since we were in second grade, maybe longer, and that’s never changed. If you’ll have me, I’d love nothing more than to be with you.” He paused a beat. “Oh, but, um, I do think marriage would be rushing it... “

You giggled, though he sounded monotone, you knew he was joking. “I’ve waited this long, I think I can wait a while longer if that’s what it takes.” The two of you shared a laugh and before you knew it, Keith had gently tugged you back into his arms. With your face pressed firmly into his chest, you could feel the erratic beating of his heart. “But really, Keith. I’ve had feelings for you for as long as I can remember. I’m glad we finally get to be here like this.”

“Speaking of, do you want to dip out and go somewhere-”

“Less loud?”

“Yeah.”

“That would be lovely.” With your hand in his, Keith led you through the crowds, neither of you bothering much to say goodbye to the now tipsy Matt and supervising Shiro, instead of finding your way outside into the crisp evening air. It felt like you could breathe finally, although you suspect part of it was because you no longer felt the crushing pressure on your chest of hiding your feelings for Keith. In fact, you realized with delight, you could now… “Hey, Keith?” You stopped on the sidewalk, with him by your side, eyeing you curiously. “Can I try something?”

“Okay?”

Letting the last of your nerves roll off of you, you took your moment of boldness and leaned up to press a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth. Keith startled, after a moment his hand left yours, instead, finding purchase on your waist to tug you closer. “(Y/n), can I try something?” His voice was barely audible, but it still sent shivers through your spine.

“Okay.”

He smiled softly before moving to capture your lips with his own. The kiss was tender and filled with love. His inexperience showed, but it was endearing and you found yourself leaning in to kiss him again after he pulled back. You were left breathless under the lamplight, grinning just as brightly as that day on the playground when Keith first agreed to be yours. And now that he’d agreed once again, well you couldn’t be any happier.

[geekgemsspooksandtoons]

Miranda

This is a story set within my Bioshock Rebirth AU. A reimaging/reboot of the Bioshock franchise. https://geekgemsspookyblog.tumblr.com/post/626141727587270656/bioshock-rebirth-timeline-this-is-a-timeline-of-an Just as a heads up if anyone is wondering about the context. I’ve had some stories in my drafts for a long time now and I’m finally publicly sharing them.

I’m finally gonna write this story. I just wanna admit this was a story idea I think I’ve had since August. Who’s Miranda exactly? She’s basically a Little Sister OC. In all seriousness this isn’t your first appearance. But this will be I guess her real or better introduction. I’ve joked about her and mentioned her to friends like @feckinatlas and @fishtankinhouse

Amazingly this story was inspired by @pikablob​ who made this Owl House fic here. https://pikablob.tumblr.com/post/625383445502246912/squishes-pikablob-the-owl-house-cartoon I’ve been just lazy to write this. I made this post in the drafts when I was living in the guest room while my room was being remodeled.

Miranda is a character that just....I guess she came to life on her own when I thought of that story. Or just the idea if one of those Little Sisters had Autism. This was inspired by a couple of things or whatever. I love this character. Despite I haven’t thought much of her. I should just write this dang story. I’ll talk about other details in another post somewhere. 

Archie and Elizabeth were in Tenenbaum’s safehouse. As of now after going tough missions sent to Archie by Atlas. It was nice to catch a breath finally. As they were safe in this area. Where the rescued Little Sisters could stay safe from harm. While Brigid was working her make shift lab and checking her supplies. The two young adults were playing with the children. They genuinely liked being around the kids. It felt like a nice break after the nightmares going on in this city. It was reminding them of what else was at stake. That they weren’t just trying to escape or help out the poorer citizens of Rapture. But these children as well.

They were living in what was a sewer section of the slums. Reasons why because Brigid knew she couldn’t do her progress in her own apartment. After being made public of what she had done. The public demonized her. Many people wanted her dead.

Brigid was lucky to find a place where sewer workers had set up a living space. Because sometimes the workers would live here in case if a pipe was busted or so. There were some rooms for some people to sleep in. It wasn’t much. But over the past 4 years, she gradually tried to make it a living space. A makeshift lab, one shower with one bathtub in one bathroom, two rooms with two beds in each, a little dining area, and one laundry room. Brigid was grateful to find a little place like this. The biggest space was where the children would sleep in bunkbeds.

For the past 4 years she gradually got resources around certain places. Especially toys for the kids if more were to live here. It was so hard yet she kept trying. She tried to make it seem like a daycare center for them. To make those kids feel welcomed. Along with making sure they knew where to go the bathroom. It took a long while. But she seemed to have gotten it handled.

The children took kindly to Elizabeth. Probably because it was rare for the children to see another woman other than Mama Tenenbaum. She got along with them just fine. Despite never dealing with children before. She was like a big sister to them. If she had the time, she would hang out with them. Considering Brigid was mostly at work or so. Even though she tried to make the place as comfy as possible. 

While at one moment, Elizabeth did hear a mention from a little one that she reminded her of someone like her. But Elizabeth didn’t understand. Maybe it was someone else she knew. Elizabeth didn’t dwell on it.

Archie never dealt with children too. Yet he was so gentle with them. In fact kind of like Elizabeth. He seemed to really enjoy being around them. They looked to him as if he was a older brother. He had rescued them and made sure they were safe. While Elizabeth had Bluto growing up. Archie hardly had anyone. To him interacting with these children who genuinely liked him made him feel less lonely than how he usual was. 

The two young adults were sitting on the floor crisscrossed. Elizabeth took time drawing on some papers with crayons with Sally. While Archie played with some trying to build a castle with blocks.

“That’s a pretty flower Sally.” Elizabeth told the girl. Sally had colored the drawn flower yellow. “I’m gonna draw a blue one. Tell me what you think of it after I’m done.” She told her.

When she began drawing her own flower. Another little one had come across her.

“Miss Elizabeth.” The little girl asked her.

“Hi Miranda. What is it?” Elizabeth asked the girl who approached her.

“Can I....touch your cheeks please?” Miranda asked her.

Elizabeth was confused. She questioned why Miranda wanted to do that. But it didn’t seem like anything bad.

“Umm sure you can do that.” Elizabeth told her as she put down the blue crayon and looked at Miranda. After that Miranda decided to calmly put her hands on her cheeks. With then Miranda squishing them a bit. Elizabeth felt a bit confused. Yet Miranda was a sweet girl that she recalled. Yet the squishing went on for a minute. Then another minute. Archie was a bit confused seeing it. But Elizabeth didn’t interrupt her. But after those two minutes, Miranda had decided to stop. 

“Is....there anything else you need?” Elizabeth asked the girl.

“No” Miranda told her. The little girl just walked away. After that Elizabeth was just confused. Maybe she liked her face or something. 

10 minutes had passed. Elizabeth and Archie decided to check in with Brigid to see if she was doing fine. The kids were just doing their own things. Considering the young adults needed a break.

“Hello Miss Tenenbaum” Elizabeth told her. 

“Hey Dr. Tenenbaum” Archie told her as well.

“Hi you too. I saw you were enjoying yourselves.” Brigid told them.

“Yeah it was nice honestly. It was nice just hanging around them more.” Elizabeth told her.

“I saw Miranda was squishing your face.” Brigid said.

“You saw that too?” Archie asked.

“Yes I did see it. Well I mean there’s clear glass here.” Brigid laughed a little after saying that.

“Oh yeah sorry.” Archie said. Forgetting that Brigid could she what was going on in that room.

“Umm Miss Tene-no I’m sorry Brigid” Elizabeth got Brigid’s attention. She just seemed so polite calling Brigid that. Even though Brigid told her she could call her by her first name.

“Yes Elizabeth.” Brigid answered.

“Why do you think she did that?” Elizabeth asked her. 

“Ah yes. Why she did that. You two know what Autism is right?” Brigid asked them.

“I have read about it in my books.” Elizabeth told her. 

“Yeah I know about it.” Archie said as well.

“Well...she has it.” Brigid told them. The two looked surprised a bit after hearing that. 

“Are you being honest with us?” Archie asked her. “I’m sorry to ask.” He told her

“Yes I am and it’s fine Archie. She’s one of the few I know who has it.” Brigid told them as she held a pen in right hand as she looked through the glass. “I wanted to tell you two that. I’ve just been busy and I think you’ve may of noticed she kind of keeps to herself.” Brigid was right. Miranda always seemed shy. She wasn’t a bad kid. Yet she acted differently than some of the other girls. Even though she got along with them. She was usually maybe playing with a little toy train or whatever else.

“How did you find out she had Autism?” Elizabeth asked her. “I read it’s could be tricky to find out if a child may have it.” Elizabeth continued on.

“Because I have it too.” Brigid told them. The two young adults stared at her. Brigid was just still looking through the glass until she looked back the two adults. “Ja I get it. It doesn’t seem like it. But trust me. You start to notice some similar traits.” She said as she decided to look through her drawers to find something. After that she found what she was looking for and got up to get closer to them.

“Again I’ve been busy. When I’m not. I try to tend for them as much as possible. Despite of what I’ve done to them. Especially Miranda.” Brigid said as she wanted to show them something. It was some sort of tangle thing.

“What’s that?” Elizabeth asked. She was curious of what she was seeing.

“A little stim toy I made. I will admit, I made this when I first got her here.” Brigid told them. “The first time she was here. She wasn’t acting right. She was in a pouty mood at times. I think she didn’t like the place here. Sometimes she would have a meltdown. So a lot of times I had to hold on to her and calm her down.” Brigid told them. “I will admit....it was strange seeing someone like me going through a different way of experiencing a disability like that. Because we’re all different.” Brigid continued on.

“But you know considering her new surroundings. It bothered some of the other girls. I knew I always wouldn’t be here to comfort her. Especially in a city like this. So I made this. She was confused by it at first. But when I gave it to her. She loved it.” Brigid told them. “Heh will admit I do like it myself.” Brigid said.

“Why are you telling us this?” Elizabeth asked.

“Because I felt it was important. I just hoped you won’t bothered by her squishing your face. I had worried maybe she needs this. Which is why I’m telling you about it.” Brigid told her. She just looked and messed with the stim toy. The two adults looked at her playing with it. “Scheiße I’m sorry I got distracted.” Brigid said as she sighed.

“Is everything okay?” Archie asked. Brigid suddenly looked saddened.

“I’ll be fine. I just remember one night when she wanted to feel safe. I allowed her to sleep in a bed with me. You know how children get nightmares they go to their parents or loved ones.” Brigid told them. “....I still remember the night she told me about her parents. That they left her at the orphanage because they thought she was....weird....” Brigid continued on as she sound more saddened after saying that.

“Are you saying her parents left her on purpose?” Archie asked.

“From what I’ve gathered....sadly yes. Because of how she is.” Brigid told them. She just looked through the glass to see Miranda keeping to herself. “She was.....strangely happy with that Big Daddy Bouncer....before I killed it.” Brigid said as she looked back at the stim toy. “She’s been here since January this year.....I wonder if she’s grateful for me. Not like I deserve it.” She then noticed Elizabeth put her hands around the stim toy. This made Brigid’s eyes widened and to look at Elizabeth.

“Hey it’s okay....I think she’s grateful to have you. And us.” Elizabeth told her. “Would you like me to take this to her?” Elizabeth asked her.

“....yes. Thank you.” Brigid nodded smiling. 

The two young adults went back out. Some sisters were on their beds resting. While some minded their own business. Miranda sat in a corner with her little train she just pushed back and forth. During that moment she was in her little world. She then noticed the two adult’s shadows pop up behind her. With her head turning around to the right.

“Hi” Miranda said softly.

“Hey Miranda.” Elizabeth told her softly. The two adults sat down close to her.

“Hey there. You feeling okay?” Archie asked Miranda.

“I’m okay. Did I make Miss Elizabeth sad or mad?” Miranda asked him.

“Oh no you didn’t. I was just confused of why you squished my face.” Elizabeth said. 

“I think your cheeks look nice.” Miranda told them. “They looked soft.” She continued on.

“Yeah they are soft.” Elizabeth smiled softly. She revealed the stim toy. “You remember this?” She asked the little girl.

The little girl gasped. “Mama Tenenbaum’s Tangle.” Miranda said sounding excited. 

“Yes it is. Do you want to hold it?” Elizabeth asked her.

“Yes please.” Miranda asked her. Elizabeth gave her the stim toy. “I like this toy a lot.”

“It seems fun. I can’t blame you.” Archie told her. The two adults admired seeing the girl play with it. “Do you feel better right now?” Archie asked her.

“Yes.” Miranda said as she looked at him so happy. She just messed with it. Just like with the train but this time. She seemed more relaxed.

“Hey Miranda. If you want to squish my cheeks. I’ll let you do that if you want to okay.” Elizabeth told her. 

“Okay.” Miranda told her smiling. The two just admiring the girl playing with the little stim toy. While behind the glass, Brigid was looking at the with a smile. Seeing a little moment like that reminds her there is still goodness in this city.

[gojosatorou]

Jujutsu Kaisen Week - Day 6 - Familial relationships

For the @jujutsukaisenweek 2020!

*Mitsuo is not an OC thats just the name I gave to Yuji's grandpa.

Mitsuo fell in love three times throughout his life. The first was to his now late wife, the second to his beautiful but headstrong daughter. And the third one, and somehow Mitsuo knew that this would be the last, was to the small, wrinkly baby that was his grandson. The baby was using his whole hand to grip Mitsuo's index finger in a vice grip. His heart also felt like it was being squeezed.

“So you're Yuji, huh” Mitsuo smiled. He reached into the bassinet and gently pinched one of Yuji's fat cheeks. Yuji scrunched up his face in discontent, making him look like a prune. “You're kind of ugly, aren't you?”

Or, you can read it in AO3

3 months old

Yuji was a sticky baby, if he wasn't being held he fussed, and if someone wasn't in the immediate line of his sight he cried and it wasn't a small cry here, or a small whimper there, it was fat ugly tears and wailing that felt like it was going to take the house down. 

And so Mitsuo got used to always having Yuji sticking to him like a tick, usually carrying him on his back, attached safely by an array of wraps. This child would rain ruin on his back, that Mitsuo knew. 

This time though, Mitsuo was simply holding against his chest as he rested on the couch. Yuji had fallen asleep a while back and so Mitsuo was simply enjoying the calm. 

“You know Yuji” Mitsuo started, his voice soft as he talked to the baby's head, where he still had that soft spot that all babies had. “Us Itadori's are kind of rotten people you know, most of them at least” 

“Not you thought, I knew you were breed differently since I first saw you” Mitsuo didn't know why he was whispering, it wasn't like the was someone else on the house, and the baby being a baby wouldnt understand was he was saying, but still this moment felt private and Mitsuo wanted to maintain it that way. 

“You were made sweet Yuji '' Mitsuo gave a soft kiss to Yuji's head, inhaling that relaxing scent that babies seem to have. “ And i'll make sure you grow up sweet” 

8 months old

Yuji was an excitable baby, always babbling, waving his arms and generally making sure that everyone in the room, even if those were mostly Mitsuo and sometimes his father, the few times that the man wasn't working, knew that Yuji Itadori was there, was awake and wanted attention. 

And his new favorite way of expending energy was to make sure that Mitsuo lost any hair he still had left. Yuji had learned how to crawl, he had already gone through the whole shebang, he rolled from his back to his front like a godman piece of wood down a hill and gotten on his hands and knees with an adorable look of concentration for a baby. And really it had started really cute, it was endearing seeing Yuji doing his best to maintain his equilibrium as he moved forward. 

But then Yuji got the hang of it, and really no baby should be able to crawl that fast. Mitsuo didn't know what he was going to do when Yuji actually learned how to walk, maybe he was going to have to get those harnesses that were appearing on TV. 

And said baby was currently doing a one man race, moving from the beginning of the hall to the end and then returning at a speed Mitsuo was sure no baby should attain on strength alone. 

For now though, Mitsuo simply observed from his place in the kitchen. He knew that when Yuji finally got tired he'd be really hungry. Future problems for future times. 

1 year old

“Grandpa, cmon Yuji I know you can do it” Mitsuo was sitting in front of Yuji trying with what felt futility to make Yuji say his first word. “Graaannpaaaa”

Yuji was not a quiet child, if anything all the contrary. But for all the noises he loved making, word seems to be completely out of his repertory. It had been a constant effort to make Yuji say a word, and one that so far hadn't bore any fruits. 

At this point Yuji was starting to get fussy and unhappy with Mitsuo's insistence. With a huff Mitsuo decided to stop for now, before Yuji broke into the waterworks. When those came it wasn't a happy time for anyone in the house. 

Maybe he should just let Yuji develop at his own pace. After all, in all ambits physical Yuji was developing at a faster pace than he should. 

With a huff Mitsuo patted Yuji's head and accepted defeat. “You do it when you feel like it”.

Yuji, who probably didn't understand anything that had happened simply gave a big, gummy smile for the exception of a few teeth and exclaimed “Grapa!”

Mitsuo stared in shock. Had the brat been waiting for Mitsuo to give up to give him what he wanted? Unlikely, Mitsuo reproched himself; he probably just needed some positive reinforcement or something. 

“Grapa!” Yuji repeated again, unhappy that in Mitsuo's shock he had stopped paying him attention. The word was more of a bastardized version of the word grape than of grandpa but still, it was the thought that counted. 

With quick hands Mitsuo grabbed Yuji and got up, spinning him in the air. 

With a blinding smile and a giggling voice Yuji continued his exclamation of 'Grapa'.

2 years and 5 months old

Mitsuo never got along particularly well with Yuji's father, he didn't get along well with almost everyone, really. So when he was gone, Mitsuo didn't feel any particular kind of way. He still went to the funeral of course, everyone deserves to be surrounded by people at the end after all. 

Yuji was being carried in his arms, his weight a small comfortable warmth. In his small hands was an urn, adorned with soft patterns. He didn't seem to understand what they were doing. But still kept quiet, his usual talking and excited noises non existent, he probably sensed the atmosphere. Yuji was smart like that.

Children started to form explicit memories at two year old, or at least that was what Mitsuo had read. So Yuji may remember things about his father, although Mitsuo would prefer if he didn't remember this moment. It was way to somber for a child. 

Mitsuo hitched Yuji higher and decided to get him an ice cream when they got home. The brat was getting heavier and heavier with each day.

 4 years old

The day was beautiful, the sky was blue and it was pleasantly warm. The only thing ruining this beautiful day were the screaming and crying children that surrounded Mitsuo. 

Yuji had been one of them, he had been happy when they left the house, excited to be outside. But when it became clear that he was to stay at their destination, grandpa not included, the waterworks started. 

But Mitsuo was strict, this was for Yuji's good, and he would not be subdued by yuji's teary eyes, not this time. It was starting to become time for Mitsuo to get more strict with the kid and this was the first step.

Also the kid needed to interact with kids his age, make friends and be a general menace to someone else.  

At the end a smiling teacher had to take Yuji by the hand and gently guide him to his class.

If Mitsuo felt a lump in his throat and moisture in his eyes as Yuji disappeared from his view, that was between himself and no one else. 

14 years old

After school clubs are important, Mitsuo thought, it was a moment for children to interact with each other outside of the classroom, a moment to forge friendships. He was happy that Yuji was part of one. 

It doesn't last long though. Because one day Mitsuo is doing work around the house and then comes the feeling of faintness and the next thing he remembers is waking up in the hospital.

As Mitsuo opened his eyes it was to Yuji's concerned face, his eyes were red and his nose seemed runny. Yuji hadn't cried since he was little and Mitsuo wasn't interested in seeing it again. 

“What's that face for, brat?” Mitsuo's voice was raspier than he would have liked. 

“I-I just. I found you on the floor and you weren't responding!” Yujis voice cracks in various places, clearly shaken by what he found when he got home. 

“Hah, as if I'd die so early. There's still a lot of things I need to teach you brat!” 

 They discharge him from the hospital a day later, with instruction to take it easy and a bunch of pills. Yuji refuses to go back to the club and every day he comes home straight from school no matter what Mitsuo tells him. 

Two weeks later Mitsuo passes out again and this time they can't give him a clear date of when he can get out of the hospital. 

 15 years old

The walls are bland, the whole room is bland really. The only splash of color are the damn flowers that Yuji insists on bringing every time he comes. He is, of course, the only visit Mitsuo receives. What a shining man* that he is. 

Mitsuo replays the dream he had, although it had been more of a collage of different memories rather than a dream. He wondered if it was some sort of clue or reminder. He had once heard that when you die you replay your whole life. But obviously Mitsuo was still alive.  

Every day Mitsuo feels weaker and weaker, no matter how much he rests or what medicine they give him. He knows he doesn't have much time left. And  If Yuji's constant visits and calls mean something, he probably knows it too. 

What a troublesome brat he got. 

The memories replay in Mitsuo's head.  Yuji is still so young, there's still so much to teach him. 

There are a lot of things that Mitsuo regrets, (the fact that his funeral is going to be a lonely one is one of them) but the one that is most prevalent in his mind at the moment is that there is no one to leave Yuji to. Mitsuo is leaving him alone. 

 “Hey Grandpa. How are you? Hope it's nice wherever you are”

Well, if there's a silver lining to all this, is that with him hospitalized there's no excuse for Yuji to miss his club activities. At least Mitsuo can make sure he has friends to rely on.

“My teachers are really cool too. I bet you'd like Nanamin, he kind of remind me of you” 

“Me? I'm doing fine don’t worry too much. I made some nice friends, and have some reliable senpais.” 

“I just came for a little visit. I have a mission around here and decided to come visit. I should get back soon though. Don't want to leave Kugisaki and Fushiguro hanging.”

“Well see you later, next time I’ll tell you all about my friends and teachers. They really are great people!” 

And so Yuji leaves the grave behind with that promise. 

[autisticangus]

anyway im so out of the loop on the mcelboys

i pretty much only keep semi-up to date with Sawbones at this point, not cuz i dont still LIKE everything else, just a lot has been goin on in my life

if anyone wants a long and rambly update on All Of The Bullshit im gonna stick a read more down here, asks are open and its cool to message me abt any of it if u want cuz i have some really nice and cool followers/mutuals here that make me comfy talkin abt that shit

as far as the future of this blog goes i wanna start using it more again! the mcelroys have gotten me out of some really dark places before so i hope having more connection to this community and the people here and their content again will help me like it has in the past! ill probs post more general mcelroy content here than previously rather than just taz btw i just gotta fuckin uhhhhh,,,, catch up on a bunch of shit again before this blog is even semi active lmaoo but im like alive and on tumblr regularly again!!

Wow u clicked on this and wanna hear me talk? Ur awesome and sweet, thanks for caring!

These past two years have been extraordinarily tough. This is gonna be a pretty long and detailed post that deals with the sensitive topics of emotional abuse, abusive relationships, and alcoholism. Please read on with caution.

Back in March of 2019, so this was about 3-4 months after i left tumblr, I got a new boyfriend and things started out really good, he was kind of a "bad boy" and it was fun at first. Im kind of a goody-goody so it was very interesting for me at first to be with someone so different who had such different life experiences than me. I liked hearing his stories of living in a traphouse, and running with gangs, and selling drugs, and knowing people who had killed people. I assumed a LOT of it was lies, obviously, who just brags about that shit u know? I just rolled with it, didnt take it seriously, and found the imagined scenarios interesting to listen to. So much of it was obviously played up to make him seem cooler, and I shouldve seen that as the red flag it was, and all my friends did but I didnt. 

He had a serious alcohol problem, I mean I had coffee in the morning and he had 2 four lokos before noon. it was bad. about 6 months into the relationship he decided i was cheating on him with my ex who i had recently reconnected with, we missed being friends and things were really going well talking and being friends again, he was really important to me! but my boyfriend saw this as yet another thing i was doing wrong. when he decided i was cheating, that become his focus of alcoholic rage. nearly every time he got drunk, which was several times a week, he would accuse me of things, he would yell and scream, he would call me horrible names and make me cry for literal hours, he never hit me but that shouldnt even matter, i was emotionally battered and mentally bruised and everything hurt. he gaslit me into believing i said and did things i never said or did, i admitted to things that were not real, and then i was yelled at for admitting them. i didnt know what to do.

he was threatening my ex too, he would get drunk and say he knew where he lived (he didnt) or he knew what car he drove (he didnt) and explained to me many times that although he had never killed someone, people had been killed before at his command. he said a bullet in the back of my ex’s brain was just a phone call and $500 away. somedays he would tell me he was just going to do it himself, with a hammer, or a kitchen knife, or whatever weapon he could get his hands on during his explanation of how he would do it. my only option was to agree, to say it didnt matter to me what happened to him, i had to pretend my on

/ly concern was him going to jail for the crime, if i showed any sign that i didn’t want my ex murdered, it clearly meant i was cheating on him. 

i pretended to block my ex on social media to get him off my back and it worked a little bit but he still brought it up. and even if he didnt directly mention him, he would always tell me when he was drunk that i was the cause of all his problems, i was why he was so self conscious, i was why he drank so much, i was why he had to work so hard, i was why every single issue he had was happening. logically i knew it was wrong, but i was so conditioned to it by then that i just went with it. i knew that agreeing and apologizing made the fighting end quicker.

things spiraled this past summer. his job needed us to relocate so we moved like 4 states away, away from all my family and friends, and lived in a tiny hotel room for a month. during this time, his drinking was somehow worse. he was drunk literally every night but he was passing out so we didnt fight and i was relieved. i was depressed being stuck in the hotel room all day alone, but thankful i wasnt being abused at least. then he started getting into drunken fistfights with his coworkers in the hotel parking lot. one day he came home just in time to find one of his drunk coworkers trying to break into the room with me there desperately trying to keep him out. i was terrified and wanted to go home but he convinced me to stay. a couple weeks after that we travelled for his work again several more states away. his drinking got a little bit better here, but i was so depressed and lonely, i was so isolated, he was all i saw day in and day out besides his coworkers and i was nervous around them. one day the guy who tried to break in on me, purposefully, while drunk, hit another coworkers car and totaled it and tried to run the guy over and i saw the whole thing. a week later my boyfriend was also fired because he got so drunk he passed out in the hotel parking lot and the company needed to save face with the hotel after the whole car incident. 

so we travelled back home, but not my home, to his where we lived isolated on a mountain with no phone signal or wifi. the house was old and not well kept from being empty for several years, half the appliances didnt work. i was more isolated than i have ever been in my life. for 4 months i stayed there and just dreaded him coming home because i knew he would be drunk again and he'd yell or accuse me of things or otherwise belittle me. it was horrible. my friends all said to leave and my parents said to leave but i was so brainwashed into thinking that if i was just a good little housewife and if i just stayed home and did the dishes and the laundry that he would be nicer but he still found things to point at and say i was cheating. he was also becoming really controlling about my food intake and weight and i already struggle with an eating disorder so that just made me feel even more like i had to stay, my brain felt like if i wasnt under his watchful eye id gain weight again, like somehow it was thanks to him i had lost weight and not my own choices.

one day last week i expressed to him wanting to leave, saying how unhappy i was, i told him how sad i felt and how i didnt think we were such a good match. he didnt take me seriously, so the next day when he got sloppy drunk before 5 pm i packed a small bag and went to my moms. i was just gonna stay for a night or two but he called and screamed at me for leaving without telling him, i told him he just didnt remember me telling him because he was so drunk, and he accused me of not caring about his feelings and made me sound like the bad guy for leaving without his permission. i told him it was just for a few days but the angrier he got the more i knew i was in the right and told him i was done. i told him we were breaking up and id come get my stuff soon.

i got my stuff while he was at work this past weekend and moved in with my best friend. im safe and happy now. things are looking so much better for me and im so thankful to my friends and family who supported me all the way to the end.

i just wanted to make this post because, i know its not mcelroy related, and a lot of ppl probably dont care for stuff like this on this kind of blog, but i think its important.

its important to friends and family of people in abusive relationships to be steady. dont give up your ground. even if the person keeps pushing back and wont leave the person, keep being there for them, it can take a long time, it took me almost 2 years to leave, it takes some people even longer, but just stay there for them and be there for them when they finally make that step. dont give up on them.

and to those who have been in these kinds of relationships, and especially those who are there right now: it is not your fault. it is so, so hard to leave, i know, but please try to find help and support and resources to do it. if all your friends dont like someone, theres a good reason for it. please dont fall into the trap of thinking your friends dont have the best intentions for you. there are so many things you may overlook in the moment that others can see from a mile away are horrible. especially if you have been abused in the past. its incredibly hard to tell what is a red flag when your gut instinct is that anything and everything is a red flag. surround yourself with people who you can trust and listen to them

and trust me, i know how hard it is when youre stuck in that spot of KNOWING you should go but fearing that first step away. its scary. its difficult. but it is worth it. find someone safe you can be with. and if you arent sure, find a reason to leave for just a few days, an excuse, anything. give yourself space from the abuser, tell yourself youre going back in a couple days, just get out from under the thumb long enough to clear your head and things will make more sense with the fog lifted.

when i first got in my car and put my kitten on my lap and told her we were going to my moms for a couple nights, i didnt know if that was the truth. i planned to come back and i knew i didnt want to. i only took enough stuff for a couple days. i couldnt imagine my life changing so drastically. where would i live? how would i make money? who take care of me? i had no clue about any of those things. but after a couple days away I realized i would take care of me. i remembered that i had worked jobs before i was with him, i could do it again. i remembered that i had options of where to live. all of those things were so clouded when i was with him, they felt like impossibilities. once i was away, even just for a short time, things were so much easier to parse.

and i know i had many privileges in this journey not everyone is afforded, and my heart goes out to those who read this and are in this situation and the options i had just arent accessible to you, i am so sorry, i wish i had something more to offer you but all i have is my story, and a wish that it gives you some hope at the very least, and a promise that if you need someone to talk to, im here, i will listen, and you will be heard and loved.

i just want everyone who reads to take something small but important away from it. love your friends, love yourself. please stay safe. please dont give up. remember love should not hurt.

[rq-s]

Title: Falling Down 

Pairing: Xu Minghao / NB!Reader

Genre: Light Angst & Platonic OR Romantic

Word Count: 2.9k+

Warnings: None. However, I do interpret the timeline and meaning of his lyrics loosely. I can’t and don’t claim that it’s the “correct” way to do so; he wrote it to be ambiguous for a wide audience to enjoy. Please watch the Falling Down Making Film for clarity.

Credits: ENG Translation of Falling Down 

Summary: You and Minghao have been consistent penpals since 2004, sharing each other’s cultures, languages, passions, and lives as you both grew up. 2014 came around and letter from him only came in 4 times, and only 1 in 2015. The last this you ever heard from him read he was a bird in a cage.

Notes: Italic = letter  ... = omitted letter content 

My Masterlist

Spring 2004

“How about this one, honey?” Mom handed me a postcard from a spot on the rack that I couldn’t reach. The large font caught my attention and told me it was a landscape picture of the closest national park. Though nothing in the picture was recognizable, it reminded me of camping, which made me smile despite having never been before.

“Sure.” Was all I said, and I followed her as she pushed our full shopping cart to the register and began chatting with the cashier.

Like usual, I quickly put the postcard on the conveyor belt along with the groceries. As soon as it was empty, I went to the bagging station and put the scanned and bagged items back into the cart. Making sure to the boxes and cartons together neatly like Tetris, careful not to squish the bread.

“What a diligent little kid you have!” The cashier spoke, her voice worn with age, but with a sense of joy that reminded me of a stereotypical grandmother.

“She always says I do it wrong.” Mom joked, smirking at me. She never did let go of my “If you want it done right, do it yourself.” attitude I had even as a kid.

 Mom finished paying, and we went put into the chilly morning air of the parking lot that was made even colder by the shadow of the supermarket. I once again moved the bags from the cart to the trunk and brought the cart to the nearest drop off spot while Mom started the car.

The ride home was mostly silent, save for the sound of the road beneath the wheels and the hum of the heater.

“Thanks for letting me do the penpal thing, Mom.”

“You’re welcome, but remember the deal; you get more chores to do. You’re 7 years old now, you can handle doing the dishes by yourself, right?” The tone of her voice was completely serious, but I couldn’t help but laugh.

“I’ve been helping with the dishes for years, and I’ve learned from the best. I’ve got this!”

 When we got home, I scoured the bags for that postcard, and luckily it was only bent on one corner. I wrote down bit of info about that park - whatever Google told me, and set it aside. I grabbed the template application from my school binder and filled in the blanks. 

Hello! My name is _____________, I’m __ years old, and I am from ________! I am learning Mandarin, but I’m still a beginner. I hope to learn more about your culture and language as we exchange letters!

For now, I will tell you a bit about myself. ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Along with this letter is a postcard and other information about where I am from!

I hope to hear from you soon!

Signed,

_____________

It was a pretty basic template that we had to copy from, and in retrospect, it was cringy as all heck, but it had to be formatted juuust right and follow the guidelines exactly, or the penpal program admin’s wouldn’t accept it.

From what I was told, someone from China who’d also applied and been approved would be paired with me, based on age and interests. Only this first letter was prewritten. Once we were paired up, the letters themselves and the mailing of them was up to me and my family. 

I was lucky I got a match at all, most of the kids in my class didn’t. I learned pretty quickly why: I was the only one who put “dancing” as an interest.  

Summer 2007

...

This was a frog I found at the lake! Mom got mad that I touched it, and when it jumped out of my hands and back into the water, it got mud all over us!! 

Later we had a barbecue and some other campers came buy, but their kids were teenagers and didn’t wanna play with me, so here is a picture of me pouting in the tent instead of having fun. 

...

This is the last one, when we finally got home from the long car ride. we all were sunburned really bad, but it looks like you can see freckles on my face because of it! 

Whenever either of us would go on trips, even just to the water park or to a festival, we’d take Polaroid pictures to send. Most the earlier pictures Minghao sent were of him at tournaments, then they turned into selfies from after dance practice. It wasn’t until they were in their teens that he began to take more artsy pictures, with the occasional selfie thrown in. He’d always put at least one polaroid in each envelope, and photography quickly became one of the many things he excelled at. 

Winter 2010

…

And I still can’t believe you were on TV!! Twice!!! All these letters… I can use them as blackmail someday when you’re a superstar! Muahah!!

I’m not nearly as good as you still, but Miss Lilly says my footwork has gotten a lot better! I wish you could teach me, but words don’t have the same effect as seeing it. I doubt I’d get it even if you tried to explain… and don’t even think about trying to teach me any martial arts, my brain will melt!!

…

My letters were always a bit longer than Minghao’s, and were full of run on sentences and unorganized thoughts. He was always clear and concise, yet sensitive. He always gave strong and encouraging advice on my Mandarin, but my English tips barely seemed to help him. I always cared more about getting to know him and telling my own stories than about practicing. Though, I don’t know what stories I had worth telling as a 13 year old. We contrasted each other a lot, and Mom said it made us a better fit for each other.

It wasn’t a weekly thing, but we always wrote when we could and has a steady back and forth. Sometimes the envelopes were thick, with many pages, postcards, candies, cool leaves or rocks we’d found, songs we had been listening too; things we cared about and wanted to share. But sometimes they were thin, barely a page long, with hastily written characters and a sincere apology. Both made me smile the same just the same – both showed how much he cared.

 Spring 2012

Perhaps it was because we were the same age, and despite not meeting, had spent so much time together. He somehow always understood me, and never made jokes when I was opening up about the less fun sides of life. He went at his own pace, and it took quite some time, but he eventually felt comfortable doing the same.

…

I’ve worked so hard for this, I know I’m capable, but I’m genuinely terrified. But I’m excited, too. I feel so overwhelmed and I don’t feel like I can tell anyone, they’ll worry, or they’ll tell me I shouldn’t do it.

I want to try. I want to be on that stage and in that tournament and I want to come out having earned something.

…

 Fall 2012

 Congratulations!! Now I can brag that I know THE Xu Minghao who won 8th at a WORLD DANCE COMPETITION!!!! I knew you’d do great. Yeah, you were nervous, but your hard work showed through!

As soon as I read the news online, I was so happy. Eight is a good number, right? I think It suits you. Even when you're laying down, you have infinite potential! That’s you, Xu Minghao, Number 8, my best friend.

Come to think of it, it's been about 8 years since we met, hasn’t it? it must be some sort of prophecy!!! Haha I’m kidding, but seriously… That’s more than half our lives. We’ve spent knowing each other half of the time we’ve even been on this Earth!

I’m really glad I know you, Minghao. I’d be lonely without your letters, I think. I hope I make your days brighter, like you make mine. I hope we never forget about each other.

 It was rare for me to get so sentimental, but he needed someone to be his fan, and I wanted to be the best fan of Xu Minghao I could be. Not to say I was the first, like I would joke about doing, but because he deserves it. I knew it from the way he talked about training, that he’d make himself a star someday, no matter what.

Because of this, though, it was this letter and onward that we stopped doing the copies and corrections. I noticed myself missing his teasing marks on my papers, or the cheeky smiley faces he’d draw when I did well. We stopped sending trinkets and polaroids too, so each envelope felt a lot emptier.

 Spring 2013

I’m really going to Korea now… The flight is in a few days, I’ll send you another letter from the new address as soon as I get there, so please wait for it!

…

I had bad dreams back then, about how things would be different, slower and distant. His letters were a significant part of my life, and I was afraid to lose that. Yet I was surprised he was even allowed to keep sending me letters. Retrospectively thinking though, it wasn’t like he wasn’t allowed to write to his family.

Was I like family to him back then?

 Winter 2013

I’m sorry for not writing you back sooner. The company has been really busy with Seventeen TV starting. I’ve been practicing a lot, I barely have time to eat or sleep, let alone sit down and write. There’s barely anyone around who knows Mandarin, and I’m still just learning how to make sentences in Korean, and they call me Myungho… Those who I can talk to are all boys, but they’re my friends, and possible group members, so I shouldn’t mind.

I miss your handwriting. Sometimes I reread our old letters, and notice that we’ve changed so much. But I keep every memory, did you know that?

I always feel better quickly. When I think about being on a stage, having fans singing with us and cheering for me… It makes me so happy that I cry, sometimes. But then I can’t help but think, “Will it ever be me? Or will I just dream of being there, and someone else will get the chance?”

That’s usually when I find one of your letters. The one you sent on my birthday a couple months ago, that you sprayed with that citrus scent? It’s my favorite, I relax so much when I read it. It reminds me of home, somehow.

I’ll try to write more often, I’m sure you’ve been patiently waiting. Let’s exchange pictures again, it’s been a while, right? I just really miss you.

 Was he like family to me? No… I think, back then at least, it was something special for me.

Summer 2014

Hey! I haven't heard from you since April! I miss you a lot, but I know you must be really busy. I’ve been trying to watch the previous Seventeen TV episodes when I can, the other boys seem funny and nice. I hope they all take care of you, like you say Junhui has been.

I’m always wishing you sweet dreams, I worry about how you’ve been. I wish I’d have asked for your phone number or email or something before, but now that you’re so busy and under a big company… I just hope these letters and postcards reach you well.

…

Fall 2014

…

Also, they’ve been saying I’ll qualify to be on SeventeenTV soon. The others are hoping it’s a sign that we’ll get to debut soon. You’ll watch it, right?

Things are looking bright for me and my brothers here, but I can’t help but feel full of dread. I can’t pinpoint why. Junhui said it might be stage fright, but I don’t feel afraid.

I know they all support me, and I support them, but I feel like I might disappear, and not even you would remember me. I know its not true but it’s what I’m feeling.

…

Winter 2014

I SAW YOU!! I watched it as soon as it released, I didn’t understand what most of them were saying without English subtitles, but I could understand you, and I saw you! I’m so proud of you Minghao, you’re an official member of Seventeen!! You’ve been working so hard, I’m sure you’re exhausted. Please try and take time to rest and heal before debut, all of you need it!

…

Spring 2015

May 26th 2015. That is the day I debut. I know we haven't talked much, but I hope you’ll be there in spirit. Thinking about you cheering for me makes it easier to handle. I’ll fight for you, for me, for them, and for us. I’ll try, even though things feel like they’re ending.

I’m going to be busier than before. I’m not sure about the contract, but I’ll try to still get letters out. For now, have this. Thank you for everything.

A layer of grey I can't escape Walls built of fear are colored all over with red Who will listen to the sound from the bottom of my heart at the end of the world(/day) There's no one by my side Flee Flee

The world is collapsing, shattering, breaking I can't find love at all So why why why (Where will I ) fall, where Hidden by the dark clouds, helpless and pitiful Can't feel myself, light is lost Before the end of the world(/day), (I'm) yelling, sounds of pain But there's no one by my side Flee Flee

The world is collapsing, shattering, breaking After I disappear completely, (you) won't realize I once existed Why why why (Where will I ) fall, where Falling endlessly, falling in silence What did I ever do wrong

Missing someone you’ve never met is an entirely separate kind of heartbreak. I began to doubt every single thought and feeling I had, every single word I wrote, everything began to bleed between imagination, ideal, and reality. 

The Minghao I watched on the screen wasn’t the Minghao I knew, and I started to wonder if I ever truly knew him in the first place. I felt like a fool, and even then, I continued to be foolish. I wanted to believe I knew what he meant; that I understood him, but as the years went on, I got more and more lost.

They won awards, they went on variety shows, they released albums, they went on tours. They traveled, they worked, and they grew. I needed to believe I knew him, but Minghao and The8 are not the same. And as I grew to love The8, Minghao began to fade into the back of my mind. When I watched him try to express himself beyond his stage persona, each time I saw flashes of a beautiful bird locked in a rusted cage.

I always kept the letters.

They’re my private collection of memories between he and I. They were the only way I knew it was real. I could run my fingers over his handwriting, feel how he sometimes pressed too hard and left marks in the paper. I could see how the paper and ink warped when he accidentally got tears on it. I could look at his pictures from his childhood and know what he was thinking as he took it. 

I knew him.

Summer 2020

Hey, Minghao. It’s me, do you still remember my handwriting? Maybe it’s changed... No, I know it has, because I’ve changed as a person. It feels strange, I know what you’ve been up to, but you might’ve even forgotten my name. But I feel in my heart that you havn’t. Maybe thats wishful thinking.

Anyway, I’m so proud of you Minghao. You’re a superstar, just like you dream of being back when you first started dancing. You’ve become part of a family, and have so many fans cheering for you every single day. Congratulations!!

…

5 years. Does the smell of citrus still remind you of home? Of me? Maybe it just reminds you of the hard times you had back then. But I guess you’ve been reminiscing about that a lot lately?

I watched the video as soon as it came out, and I was shaking as soon as I heard your voice. That song isn’t a special piece of yourself that you shared with me anymore, but it’s part of your story for the whole world to see, and you told it so well.

...

I miss you.

It was finally time.

It was a fairly thick envelope, inside were many postcards of where I’ve been, quickly written notes as I reacted to songs and memorable moments, and full-length letters that never got sent.

It was so surreal to sit in front on him at this panel. He looks just like he did as a kid, but more refined, stronger inside and out. His aura intimidated me like I was seeing a skyscraper touch the clouds for the first time, and yet he maintained eye contact with me like I was a dandelion about to be blown away with the breeze.

“It’s me, Minghao.” The words barely drifted from my mouth, but they struck him like lightning as realization stealing his breath away. For a moment I saw his eyes twinkle, and the corners of this lips twitch.

A member of staff took the envelop away from him; he barely was able to read the label.

My time would be up soon.

His fingers intertwined with mine and he opens my photobook to his page with his free hand, looking down for only a moment to sign it.

The next Carat was nudging my shoulder already.

“Not yet.” I whispered both to them and to him with a squeeze of his hand. He did the same, like a beat of the heart, and then released. I watched his chest rise and fall with a deep breath as he gave the next fan the same focus and care he gave me. 

I forced a smile on my face as I scooted over.

Did he truly realize it was me? Why could I feel his heart beating faster from the tips of his fingers? Did he want to contact me all this time, or had he chosen to stop and was scared to tell me? Did he miss me too?  

My smile was only fake for a moment, though.

I was meeting his second family for the first time, after all, I needed to make a good impression. After years of keeping up with the group, it should have been easier to feel comfortable, and to be happy like the others.

Yet my hands continued to shake, their faces blurred and the sounds around me went quiet. My senses went in and out of focus like waves reaching and leaving the shore.

The warmth and the texture of his hand stained mine, and as i stared down at it after going back to my seat in the crowd, it felt alien. His hands are same hands that have been writing my name on every envelope for so many years...

I felt like I was falling.

[magpiemorality]

It's Friday so I hope you're open for prompts because you know what would be amazing? A TMA au. I don't know how far you've gotten but some sexy avatars in a love-hate relationship because they belong to different fear entities sounds very cool. May I suggest the End, the Vast, the Spiral and/or the Eye? - LC

I saved this for a long time until I finally finished season 4 (I still haven’t started season 5 be patient with me ahhh) 

MILD SPOILERS FOR THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES

AO3

Warnings: Semi-graphic thoughts of violence

***

“Aren’t you supposed to just know?” The thing that took the name Remus gripes, following after the Eye’s eyes as they stride along ahead of him, far too fast. “Why are we bothering with any of this?”

“Because it is a waste of my time and effort to try and impart knowledge to you all one by one, do keep up,” Logan snaps back coldly. Remus just makes a face and bares his teeth slightly, comforting his bruised feelings with images of graphic mutilation of that pretty clear skin, testing whether or not those eyes could still see if they weren’t attached to a head... 

They’ve been wandering these damn tunnels for what feels like years, and Remus isn’t sure who to blame. Himself, perhaps, for agreeing to come down here even though he knows its a mess. He’s never been one for playing nice with the other avatars, but the world is changing and if Logan is right then there is a need for cooperation, now. 

Still didn’t mean they needed to hold meetings in the stupid tunnels though. 

Voices suddenly pick up in the distance and Remus perks up again, speeding up to catch up to Logan’s steady loping gait. They glance at each other with wry amusement when a door suddenly appears, and step through into the full space that awaits. 

“What took you so long?” Janus grins, lounging on a sofa by the bookshelves. He inspects his fingernails innocently, as though he had nothing to do with it. Remus bares his teeth at the tricky creature. Bad enough the guy had served the Stranger, arguably (in Remus’ opinion) the most pointless of the lot, now he’d apparently changed allegiances in time to become an avatar? Fuck’s sake, were they letting anyone in these days?!

Virgil stands and casts a glare at them all, pausing just to cough a tiny spider out of his mouth before moving to show them to their places, all laid out in a rough circle around the room. Remus spots the others, Desolation, Hunt, Lonely... They’re almost a full cohort. Even the dear old Vast has managed to bring himself to this tiny, claustrophobic room. Buried couldn’t look more comfortable, of course. 

Remus gets himself comfortable in his armchair and starts to pluck at the fabric, ripping into the upholstery as Logan stands up and nods his thanks to Virgil. All eyes turn to the Eye and he opens his mouth to speak.

“Now. About the end of the world...”

-

[inorganicone2230]

The Caged Bird (Part 5) Yandere!Erasermic x Fem!Reader

Part 4 Part 6/Finale

Summery: For the Gods of Life and Death, loneliness seemed a heavy thing to bare when confronted with the prospect of facing it for an eternity, even with each other. That is until a chance encounter with a certain someone prompts them to think that just maybe, that lonely eternity can be abated, as long as they have the right person to share it with.

Side Note: This is a prequel to my other Yandere!Erasermic story called Divine Intervention. If you have not read that one yet, I highly recommend you go and do that before reading this one.

Warnings: Not many for this chapter, just some light stalking and some kind of magical roofie.

You were awoken by an insistent knocking at your door.

A quick glance around at your still dark home, lit only by the glow of a small fire in the hearth, gave you an indication that it was still very late at night. And there was still a raging storm outside, if the howling wind was anything to go by. You’re first thought was that a traveler had perhaps gotten lost and was in need of a place to wait out the storm. It certainly wouldn’t have been the first time, but it was always something you were very cautious about. 

You were just debating on weather or not you should answer it when you realized that the voice on the other side, though muffled by the door and the storm, sounded familiar. Very familiar…

“Sweetling! Are you in there!? Please open up if you are, it’s quite cold out here!”

“Hizashi?” You questioned, bolting up to open the door for them, you just assumed Shouta would be there as well. What in the name of The Gods were they doing out this late at night, and in this storm no less!? Ripping the door open, you were greeted by the sight of the two men. 

They looked the same as always. Both wearing gentle smiles on their faces and not a single hair was out of place on either of them. Even their clothing was perfect! In fact… the fabric wasn’t moving at all, even as you saw the harsh wind whip the snow in all directions, their clothes and hair remained still. It was… a little unnerving to say the least. But you ushered them in all the same.

Something feels off, you thought, shutting the door and grabbing a few logs to build the fire back up. It was true, normally you felt nothing but ease around these two, but something about this felt… wrong. That was the best way you could describe it. Maybe it was because it was the middle of the night, and you had only been awake for a few minutes, not to mention that one of the worst blizzards you had ever seen was raging outside. Then there was the matter of their physical appearance, neither of them looked like they had been standing out in a storm for a few minutes, let alone the amount of time it would have taken to walk or ride a horse here.

“I certainly hope you two have a good reason for showing up at my door this late at night. How did you make it here anyway? The road has to be completely covered by this point.” You sad, placing the wood over the still hot coals and holding your hand over the heat to warm them.

It was Shouta hero spoke first. “We have two very good reasons. Reasons that we just couldn’t wait to tell you about.”

“Oh?” You asked, raising an eyebrow in question.You hated that your curiosity was overpowering your rationality, your mind still unable to place where this trepidation was coming from.

Hizashi stepped forward and took your cold hands in his own, his skin felt so warm to the touch that you had to stop yourself from leaning in closer to him. “Yes. There are some things that we would like you to hear us out on. Something that we’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now. Please keep an open mind until we are done, I promise that it will all make sense once we've had a chance to explain.”

Unable to think of words to use, you simply nodded. Both of them smiled at your compliance and placed their hands on your back, guiding you to sit at the table.

“Are you cold Kitten?” Shouta asked, he must have noticed your shivers the further you moved from the hearth.

“A little bit. But it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

The two shared a look, something that you noticed they did quite often, almost as if they were communicating without words. “Nonsense. Let me go grab your blanket.” He said, stepping away for only a moment. You swore you felt his hands gently run over your back and shoulders when he draped the heavy material over you.

“Alright you two, enough stalling. What was so important that you couldn’t wait until morning to tell me, or better yet, when the weather cleared up?” The words came out more nervously then you would have liked, and you suddenly found the table to be very very fascinating as you were unable to meet their eyes for very long.

“You do the talking Shou. I’ll probably blunder this if I try.”

“Very well.” Shouta turned to look at you, his dark eyes looking more intense than you had ever seen them. “Kitten, I’m going to be blatantly blunt with you when I say this… Shouta and Hizashi, those are not our true names, they are the names we call each other but not the names we are more commonly known by.”

What was he talking about. “Alright, I’m very confused. What does this have to do with anything? If Shouta and Hizashi aren’t your real names, then does that mean you’ve been lying to me this whole time about who you are?” You weren’t angry, just confused and tired. You just wanted this conversation to end and go back to bed.

“No no no! We haven’t lied to you about anything Sweetling. We just… omitted a few things. We were worried that if we told you about them right away, you might get scared.” Hizashi interjected.

You nodded, an indication for them to proceed. Though your gut was telling you to ask them to leave, you refrained. They were still your friends after all, you wanted to be able to give them the benefit of the doubt and at least let them explain themselves.

“For starters; to us, Shouta and Hizashi are our real names, the names we have always known each other by. But the names we were born with are-“ Shouta hesitated for only a moment, as if he might reconsider what he was about to say. “The names we were born with are Aizawa and Yamada.”

You blinked at them owlishly. Were they actually being serious right now? You waited, almost expecting Hizashi to bust out laughing and say it was just a joke. Because that’s all this could be, right, just a big joke. “ Aizawa and Yamada? As in the Gods of Life and Death?”

They both just nodded. 

You sighed, this was ridiculous. “Is this seriously what you came her for in the middle of the night, in this kind of weather? A practical joke? Because I do not find it amus-”

Shouta interrupted you, his voice eerily calm. “We can give you proof. We don’t expect you to just take our word for it. We’re not that unreasonable (Y/N).”

“Oh really?” Obviously you were skeptical, but something about their straitlaced demeanor was making you wonder, and that big question hung heavy in the air between the three of you.

What if?

What if they were telling the truth? It was crazy, illogical and far fetched to be sure, but recalling a few choice experiences from over the years, things that just couldn’t be explained with logical reasoning, gave you cause to second guess yourself.

“Prove it. If what you’re saying is true, then prove it to me. Prove that your not as crazy as you sound.”

Shouta’s attention turned to something behind you and, to your shock and amazement, his eyes turned a bright crimson that seemed to glow in the dim light of your home. You would have thought it was just the fire and your sleep addled mind playing tricks on you, but the longer you stare into those glowing orbs the harder it becomes to try and find a logical answer. That proves to be even more true when you follow his line of sight to see what he is looking at.

 Behind you sits a wooden cage housing two fully grown rabbits you had snared with the intention of keeping in case your food supplies ran low during the winter. Your eyes widening when you realized that both were slumped over on their sides unmoving, not breathing.

Dead.

“W-What? But how? They-They were just…” You can’t seem to form coherent thoughts or words as you attempt to process what you are seeing. The animals were just fine when you went to bed, having fed them a bit of collected grass and hay, there was absolutely nothing you could think of that would have caused them both to drop dead. Nothing normal anyway…

“Shouta has given you his proof Sweetling, but I still need to give you mine.” You hear the blonde say as you whip your head around to stare at them, your breath catching in your throat at the sight of Hizashi’s eyes glowing in much the same manner as Shouta’s had. But where Shouta’s eyes had gleamed a brilliant red, Hizashi’s eyes were no longer green, but instead were lit up a sparkling gold, brighter than the sun and twice as captivating.

He stood up as graceful as ever and walked over to the small cage, your gaze following him like a hawk, compelled to see if he was really going to do what you suspected he was intent on showcasing for you.

Stretching out his hands, he laid them upon the now dead animals. They radiated the same gold as his eyes and from one moment to the next, the two rabbits were moving again as if they had never ceased. They appeared none the worse for wear, shaking themselves and going right back to munching on hay.

Hizashi meanwhile, turned to face you with a cheeky smile on his face. “So, was that proof enough for you? Do we meet your expectations My Lady?”

Honestly, you were to flabbergasted to say anything at first. You had no idea how long you may have sat there replaying the last two or three minutes in your mind, but it was long enough that when you finally looked at them both again, they were giving you concerned looks. So you said the only thing you could think of.

“The Gods are sitting at my table… How the fuck did this happen?”

That less than eloquent statement is what seems to break the spell of seriousness that was hanging between the three of you, the two men bursting out into peals of laughter. First Hizashi, who is loud and boisterous compared to Shouta’s quiet chuckles, and finally yourself. You laughed so hard the blanket Shouta had draped over your shoulders actually slipped off. This went on for a few minutes before you all seemed to collect yourselves and you were finally able to speak past your shock.

“I’m not even sure how I should be acting right now. I feel like I should at least be bowing to you.” You sigh, your smile still in place when you look both of them in the eye, that feeling of unease finally fading. “You do realize that the shock of that could have very well given me a heart attack, right?”

Both of them instantly stopped smiling at you though, their eyes wide with an emotion you couldn’t quite seem to place. Had you said something wrong? Were you being too familiar with them, not formal enough? You had gotten the impression that they wanted things to stay the same despite you now knowing who they really were. Did you miss interpret what they meant?

“Hay, did I say or do something wrong?” You asked wearily.

They gave each other that same look again before turning their gaze back onto you. “No, we’re not upset at you Kitten. Just please don’t ever say something like that again. Please…” Shouta whispered, sounding almost desperate.

You were very confused. “Don’t say what again?”

This time it was Hizashi who spoke, but not before both of them stretched their hands across the table, each of them taking one of your hands in their own. “Please don’t ever speak of yourself dying Sweetling. The thought is just too horrible to bare. I-” He looked to Shouta and then back to you. “We don’t know what we would do without you (Y/N). You mean the world to us.”

Once again you’re at a loss for words. The two of them are looking at you like you’re the divine figure, like you’re the one that they should be praising, not the other way around. Briefly, you try to tug your hands away from them, but they only cling on tighter than before. That nervous feeling is coming back with a vengeance.

“Y-you’re almost making it sound like you’re in l-love with me or something.”

“Because we are.” Shouta says bluntly, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to admit.

You waited to see if they were going to start laughing, to see if they were going to do anything other than stare at you as if you were the light of their world. They didn’t, and in turn you lost what little composure you had. 

“W-what?!” You shouted, looking at them in pure disbelief.

“We know that this must be a lot to take in all at once, but please believe us when we say that we are in love with you Darling. We have been since the moment we saw you pick up Zashi’s little cardinal.” Shouta said softly, giving your hand a little squeeze.

You were bordering on having a full blown panic attack, but something about that statement caught you off guard. “The-The cardinal? You were there when I found it?”

“Yes.” Hizashi said, almost looking a bit nervous. “We were out in the woods searching for it when we spotted you picking it up. We didn’t want to startle or frighten you, so we just let you take it home and nurse it back to health. We figured that after you released it, we would go and thank you properly. Obviously we couldn’t just outright tell you how we knew about it, or who we truly are, you would have thought we were insane. So we did fib a bit when we said that we lived nearby.”

Before you could even get a word in edgewise, Shouta was already picking up where Hizashi left off. “We wanted to get closer to you, and let you get to know us a bit before we told you how we feel. But, it’s not just about the care you showed the bird though, it’s about you.” He stopped for a moment, smiling as both of them looked at you fondly. “You’re so sweet and kind and beautiful. You always have a positive outlook on things and even when you do get upset, you always try to be reasonable and rational about everything.”

“And you’re such a hard worker! You have no idea how hard it’s been, watching you slave away for nothing in this dump. That’s why when you come home, we will be seeing to all your needs for you. One such as you should never have to lift a finger or toil away in the dirt for food.” Hizashi’s smile was near blinding by the time he finished off their declaration.

You had no idea what to make of this, it was just way to surreal. But so many things were starting to add up now. Like the way they always sought out excuses to touch you, brushing your hand as you gave them cups of tea or placing their hands on your back to guide or steady you. The endearing nicknames, and the fact that they always insisted on coming to visit you instead of the other way around. You never would have found their supposed home because it didn’t exist, at least not in the place they said it was.

“W-Why now? Why choose this particular time to come and tell me this?” You finally managed to speak, looking down, unable to meet their loving expressions.

Shouta just kept smiling, and you felt how he began to run his thumb back and forth over the top of your hand when you tried to pull away again. “Winter has come and we wanted to bring you home before the weather got too bad. There is no way we could ever let you keep living here now that it has gotten so cold. What if you got sick? We would never forgive ourselves.”

Hizashi just nodded along with his partner. “We’ll let you grab any trinkets or things you want to bring back with you, there is plenty of room at the palace, so don’t be concerned with how much you bring. We got you all sorts of new clothes though, so you can leave the ones you have here.”

Your head was spinning and neither of them were giving you a chance to speak and it was becoming a bit annoying. It sounded like they had already made the decision for you, or at least, were already banking on your agreement to be with them. 

Well, Gods or not, they were about to learn otherwise.

“Shouta, Hizashi!” That seemed to get their attention and they both paused their gushing to look at you. “Now that I have your attention, can you two please just stop and listen to me for a moment?”

Shout cleared his throat and both of them simultaneously let go of your hands which you quickly placed in your lap. “Of course Kitten. Our apologies for getting a bit carried away, we’re just so happy that you finally know the truth and we don’t have to hide it from you anymore. It’s like a weight has been lifted from us.”

You wish that he hadn’t said that, it made what you were about to tell them seem even more cruel, you thought, but you couldn’t just let them keep thinking you were okay with this when you weren’t. It wouldn’t be fair to any of you. They were kind enough to be honest with you, so the least you could do is extend the same courtesy back to them.

You take a deep breath, though you still find it too hard to meet their eyes. “Listen you two, I’m flattered, humbled actually, that you two think so highly of me and I value this friendship with you more than anything. How many can truly say that they have received the favor of the Gods?” You smile sadly, here comes the hard part. “But I have no desire to leave this home of mine, or to be in a relationship with anyone. I love this place, it’s a home I have worked hard to make for myself and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Not to mention my friends and family, I love them as well and would never forgive myself for just abandoning them without a word. Because I highly doubt you would be willing to reveal who you really are to all of them.” You can feel tears welling up in your eyes at this point. “So I’m sorry, but I am going to have to respectfully tell you that I just can’t return your feelings.” The tears are falling down your cheeks before you can even stop them.

After a few moments of weighted silence, you finally lift your head to face the men whose hearts you just broke. The two looked shell-shocked and you realized that you had guessed right, they had just assumed that you felt the same way about them, they had never even considered that you might say no. It filled you with an emotion that was both parts annoyed and guilty, you weren’t sure what to make of it.

Surprisingly, Hizashi was the one to speak first. His cracking voice and trembling lower lip just adding salt to the wound. “I-I… We just th-thought that you f-felt as s-strongly for us as we do for y-you. Did we do something w-wrong?” A few tears escaped the corners of his eyes.

Shouta is much less emotional than Zashi, but still looks equally as sad. “We’ve poured our hearts out to you Kitten, can’t you at least give us a better reason then simply not wanting to leave your home. That excuse is flimsy at best since you spend the majority of time isolated away from other people and only see your family on rare occasions.” If it wasn’t for the sad forlorn look on his face, you would have thought he was insinuating that you were lying, and you weren’t, you just omitted a few details. The fact that he picked up on this went a long way in telling you how well they knew you.

“It’s not as if it’s a big secret or anything, I’ve just never felt the need to be with someone like that… and to be honest, I doubt I ever will. I never felt infatuated with anyone from my village, not even the smallest of crushes. My parents and family understood this and never judged me when I told them that I wanted to move out here and fix this place up, that I preferred a life of solitude to one full of people. That’s really all there is to it. I’m sorry if I gave you the impression that I reciprocated these feelings you have for me. It never would have been my intention to lead you on like that. Not ever.”

You could cut the tension with a knife it was so thick. You just didn’t know what else to say. It’s not like you could magically make yourself feel the same way for them, or make them stop having these feelings for you in turn. It was an unfortunate situation all around.

“W-we understand (Y/N). We’re not mad at you or anything, it just wasn’t the response we were expecting. I suppose we did get a bit carried away when planning all of this out.” The God of Life scratched the back of his head and attempted to give you a smile, but you could still see the way his eyes glistened and his lips trembled. “We should have done more to make our feelings known, instead of just springing them on you out of the blue like this.”

You also gave him a weak smile in return and shake your head. “No. You have nothing to apologize for. If anything, I’m sorry for not realizing how you two felt sooner, now that I think about it, it all seems so obvious now.”

“It seems we’re all to blame for the misunderstanding. I don’t believe any of us need to be apologizing.” Shouta said.

“That is true. Perhaps we should all get some rest, I think we will all feel a lot better after we have had a chance to sleep on it.” Saying that though, did bring to mind something that worried you greatly and you had to voice the question before you could ever hope to go back to sleep. “What does this mean for us? Will the two of you still be coming around? I meant it when I said that your friendship means the world to me, I don’t want to lose either of you. Not over something like this…”

You felt one set of hands gently lifting your face to meet Shouta’s deep dark eyes, and another set hugging you from behind. You felt vaguely uncomfortable with their close proximity and under normal circumstances you would have pushed them away, but given the outcome of this night, you decided to let them have this little bit of comfort.

“We promise Kitten, you are not going to lose us. We are going to be apart of your life for a very long time to come. This little setback doesn’t change that we still care about you very much. I doubt anything could change that.” The God of Death said, gently tubing your tear stained cheeks with his thumbs.

You felt Hizashi squeeze you tighter and not in agreement with his counterpart. “You can’t get rid of us that easily Sweetling. Your stuck with us through thick and thin.”

You smiled, content to let them hold you like this for just a bit longer.

Until a yawn sounded from you and the two Gods decided it was time for the little human to go back to bed.

“I’ll make you some tea to help warm you up before you go back to bed. It’s the least I can do since we woke you up at this unholy hour.” Shouta stated, already moving to prepare the hot beverage.

“And I’ll put a few more logs on the fire.” Hizashi offered as he stood up as well.

A short ten minutes later, Shouta placed a steaming cup of tea in front of you and the two insisted on showing themselves out.

“We’ll see you soon, try to get some sleep Sweetling.”

“Have a good night Kitten, and please don’t forget to drink your tea.”

“Thank you both! Have a good night yourselves and I’ll see you next time.” You said with a wave, feeling genuinely happy as they turned at walked out the door, vanishing into the white world outside.

—————

Hizashi was shaking and sobbing as he clings onto Shouta for dear life, like he might vanish into thin air if he loosened his hold for even a moment.

“It wasn’t supposed to be like this Shou!” He wailed. “She was supposed to smile and cry and say she loved us too. She was supposed to ask to be taken home. We should be showing her the nursery right now, and she should be begging us to make love to her, to give the babies we’ve been dreaming of for months!” It felt like his heart was shattered into a million pieces and you were the only one that could put them back together. How could you not feel the same?! He knew that you were the one for them the moment he heard your voice. It was destiny! How could you not see that?!

Shouta just rubs his dear Zashi’s back, trying to offer him what little comfort he could. He too was stunned by your rejection. He never once considered that you would turn them down and he was kicking himself for not planning ahead for all the outcomes, even the ones he didn’t believe were possible. He still didn’t believe that you felt the way you claimed, you must just be confused, you just needed time to come to terms with all the knowledge that had been presented to you this night.

And there was no better place to sort out your own feelings then in your future home, with them by your side to guide you through all of it. That is precisely why he had cast The Sleep of The Dead enchantment over your tea. It would put you into a deep slumber so that they could bring you home without any risk of you waking up.

“Shhhhh, everything will be just fine Zashi.” He whispered, petting his soft golden hair and kissing his forehead tenderly. “As soon as she falls asleep we will go and get her. She might be shocked and angry for a while, but I am sure that after some time spent with us in the Heavens, she will be just as happy, if not more so, then she ever was in this wretched place.”

Hizashi sniffled and looked up at Shouta, his bright green eyes hopeful. “Do you really think so? Because I can’t live without her Shou! I need her more than words can express. We need her!”

Shouta leaned down and gave him a kiss. It was sweet and chaste, but so full of the love and passion he felt for the other man that even Hizashi, in his shattered state, could not help but trust in him.

Shouta pulled back, a small smile gracing his lips. “I promise you Zashi, things might be hard at first, but it will all be worth it in the end. I swear it.”

So I lied, this will NOT be the last chapter. But the next will be... I think... maybe...hopefully... it really all depends on the characters. LOL

I hope you all enjoy!

This chapter is dedicated to @talpup!!! Thanks for all this awesome brainstorming sessions, as well as all the ones I’m sure will follow! And for posting that amazing chapter of Chaos early for me, it defiantly helped my day yesterday.

[rickssugarplum]

In Your Eyes

Hi everyone! It’s been awhile and I haven’t had any ideas lately so, this idea was given to me by a lovely person on Discord! I hope you like it! Season 4 will be here soon! ❤ (P.S. Season 4 will be here soon! :O)

(Rick C-137 x Reader) SFW, Swearing, Depression, TW: Mentions of Suicide, Drinking, Hurt/Comfort

You find Rick in a moment of self-hatred. You do what you can to help him.

                                      ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Sometimes I think you want me to touch you. But how can I when you build the great wall around you? - Tori Amos

In the dark of night, it was quiet in the Smith house. You were alone on the couch in the living room, reading one of your books. It gave you some normalcy that seemed foreign to the family now. Nothing was normal with Rick in your life. Honestly, it was too late to be up, but you hadn’t seen him in awhile and he had probably gone off planet. You looked at the clock to check the time.

2:15 a.m. 

You pursed your lips in worry as you turned a page, wondering how much longer he will be gone. The wait did not last much longer. You heard a low hum of an engine, presumably his space ship as it landed in the garage. Closing the book you stand up from the couch when you heard a loud crash emitting from the garage. The sound of shattering glass startled you, causing more panic than before. You waited for any other sounds, but it soon became quiet. Taking light steps toward into the kitchen, you stopped in front of the garage door. Only a moment of hesitation passed before you lightly knocked. No response. You knocked again, this time calling his name. 

“Rick?” you called out. No answer. One more time was the last straw before you decided to gently turn the knob and pushing the door open, making yourself in. Immediately, you saw broken bottles and spilt chemicals all over the floor. Mangled metal and shattered bulbs were sprawled on his workbench. Looking up, you found Rick, his back to you, sitting with his head down. He had yet to acknowledge your presence. You took light steps closer to him and you see his flask tipped over with alcohol dripping down the table. You hear his breathing. His shoulders were trembling. That’s when you heard his light sobbing. Immediately, your heart ached. Rick was never one to cry. Not like this...

“....Rick?” you called out softly to him. The only response were more sniffles. You tried again. Now close enough to reach him, you place your hand delicately on his shoulder. “Ri-” Your hand is quickly smacked off his shoulder, his growl making you jump. 

“Get the fuck away from me!” he barked. 

Your trembling hand reached out to him again. “Rick please-”

He did not budge. He stood up from his chair, towering over you. “Get out now!” he ordered. His face was close enough for your nose to get a whiff of his breath reeking of alcohol. He was clearly intoxicated, drunk with more alcohol than his already tolerant body could handle. But, you did not stir. In his rage, you noticed his eyes were red and bloodshot and face damp with tears. You couldn’t give up on him. 

“I just want to help you...” you whispered. He scoffed. “I don’t want any help.” he insisted, crossing his arms.

“That’s bullshit, Rick.” What was that phrase he blurted out? Wubba lubba dub dub. You learned a while ago what it really meant...

I am in great pain. Please, help me.

How many nights had he spent alone? That he would cry to himself, thinking back of everything he’s lost?  Or when he would....

No. You were not gonna let that happen. As long as you had breath your body, you’d make sure he was safe.

“I’m not leaving you like this.” 

Annoyed with your defiance, he closed his eyes and turned around leaning over his workbench. “You...Y-you can’t fix this.” he declared. Fix what, you didn’t know. His issues? Himself?

“I’m not here to fix anything.” you assured him. He didn’t respond. ‘I just....want to tell you I’m here if you need anything. You don’t have to go through it alone, Rick...”

He fell back in his chair, sulking as he rested his arms on the table. A shaky exhale escaped his lips. His voice trembled when he finally spoke.

 ‘I....I deserve to be alone...”

You could’ve heard a pin drop at his statement. He truly believed that. Years of self-hatred and trauma had gotten him to this point. What could be done to remedy that? If he couldn’t do it, how can anyone? Of all the things he has in his lab, his inventions, his mind. What did he lack? As you looked into his shaking frame, it hit you.

He never learned to love himself.

A few things you learned about Ricks. One, they’re the smartest in the universe. Two, they absolutely hate themselves. Their self-hatred had no limits. You didn’t want to bare the thought of how many of them ended their own lives, how lonely they truly were inside their old, broken hearts. 

“Fuck. I’m worthless.” he cried. Your throat tightened at his despair. It took everything you had in your body to not falter. 

This is not about you. He needs you.

Taking timid steps behind his seat, your hands gently landed on his tired shoulders. This time, Rick did not pull away. Slowly, your fingers started rubbing his pent up tension away. You felt his body loosen at your touch. He was still quiet, but he allowed you to continue. After all, physical touch was one way to release good chemicals in the brain. You made sure you were gentle, tracing feather-like strokes down his back.

“Is..is this okay, Rick....?” you asked him quietly. He felt himself shiver at your concern so close to him. It had been so many years since he let himself be so vulnerable around someone. Suddenly, he found his head start to pound again, eyes becoming blurry. In frustration, Ricks face grimaced and he abruptly placed his hands in his hair. Quick pants erupted from him as he harshly grasped on his blue strands. You faced him and took his hands in your own. 

“Rick, stop. You’re hurting yourself...” you begged, keeping his hands away. He didn’t fight it, his eyes were squeezed shut, teeth clenched. Tears had escaped his shut eyes, pouring down his wrinkled face. “No shit! I deserve to hurt!” he yelled. Your mouth went agape. “That’s not true at all, Rick. What the hell makes you think that?” you questioned. He took one deep breath, before he went off.

“Everyone good in my life I hurt. I hurt my friends. I hurt my daughter. I hurt my wife. I hurt my grandkids, I hurt you! All I do is hurt people! No one should love me.” 

His head sunk down, no longer looking at you. As hard as it was for him to tell you this, it was what he believed was the truth it was now your turn to give him yours.

“And yet I do.”

Rick looked up to see your certain demeanor. You cupped his face in your hands, looking into his sad eyes. In them you saw everything he’d been hiding away. Wiping his tears with your thumbs, you assured him. “And yet your daughter does and your friends. Your grandchildren love you. No matter what you think they should or shouldn’t do, they do because as humans, we can’t choose who we love...”

Rick was silent. You knew had more to say. “When people love, they do anything to show them just how much. I...I want you to know that...I’ll always be here for you.”

Before he could object, you placed your lips gently on his own. The bitter taste of hard liquor hit your mouth, but you didn’t care. Surprised, he kissed back in appreciation. You pulled back with a warm smile, telling him, “I love you...”

You felt him shiver at that. He’s always had trouble with that four-letter word, but it was not too late for him to experience it. Slowly, Rick opened his arms, clear what he wanted without saying it. Happy to oblige, you climbed into his lap and fell into his embrace. His grip was a bit tighter than usual, more desperate. But you wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed his cheek, affirming you were not going anywhere. Burying your face in his neck, you relaxed for a while as he held you tight like a lifeline. It was quiet for awhile before he finally spoke.

“Thank you, baby...” he murmured. You simply replied back,

“Anything for you.”

Nothing was said after that. Just the two of you together in each other’s arms, exchanging kisses, sharing unconditional love in silence.

❤

[bentacles-hargreeves]

Remus’ List of AU Fanfic Favorites - @tuafeedbackfest​

Thank you to all the writers in this amazing fandom who worked hard on making and sharing their stories with us, without you the fandom wouldn’t be the same!

Sealskin, by intheflowers (Mature) “Dave is a lighthouse keeper on an isolated island. It’s a lonely life until a mysterious man washes ashore.” Selkie AU, In-Progress, 17/19 Chapters & 59,209 Words.

Choirs Threaten in Voices I Only Feel, by VeteranKlaus (Teen and Up) “The last time Klaus saw his siblings was at Allison and Patrick's wedding. A lot had changed since then; including the not-so-accidental, irreversible loss of his sight. There's no time to tell them that, though. Not with the return of their long-presumed-dead brother and the impending apocalypse. Plus, it doesn't matter. He's got Ben as a good seeing-eye ghost.” Blind Klaus, Complete, 10 Chapters & 61,104 Words.

Friends, I Too Feel the Temptation to Jump Aboard Passing Freight Trains and Journey to a New Life, but We Haven't Thought It Through, by ObliqueOptimism (Not Rated) “After getting sober, Klaus found a new way to cope with the ghosts.“ Agoraphobic Klaus, Complete, 3 Chapters & 14,489 Words.

The Miracle Seven, by UnrememberedSkies (Mature) “He mostly saw them through the CCTV cameras installed in their cells. He had never spoken to them. He wasn’t sure anyone had really spoken to them properly, as people instead of test subjects. But watching them, every night, all night, he felt like he knew them, just a little. In another universe, it is not Reginald who gets his hands on the kids, but a secret research facility. The would-be Hargreeves grow up in total isolation, their only human contact the scientists that test and push their abilities to the limit. A security guard watches them through the CCTV cameras in their cells, and sees the humanity in these powerful, damaged creatures.” Outsider POV, Oneshot, 2,850 Words.

lay me down in the river (wash this place away), by siriuspiggyback (Teen and Up) ““So,” said Dave, folding his arms. “Your name?” The man opposite licked his lips, eyes cutting between his hands and Dave’s face. Eventually, just as he was beginning to think that the ‘trooper wouldn’t crack, he said, “Designation KL-0040.”” Star Wars AU, In-Progress, 10/? Chapters & 15,385 Words.

can i dream for a few months more?, by intheflowers (Teen and Up) “A woman dreams of the child she gave away. It's fine as long as she can deny what she sees. (When she finally wakes up to the reality of the situation it will be too late.) On the other side of the world, a boy dreams of a woman he does not know. While he's too young to understand who she really is, one day he'll figure it out. (And by then he will have other things to worry about. By then, all he'll really want is a safe place to sleep.) Or: I go wild with the idea of Klaus having the power to dreamwalk and meeting his birth mother that way.” Complete, 3 Chapters & 33,518 Words.

Comes And Goes (In Waves) by hujwernoo (Mature) “The apocalypse happens, Five arrives in the rubble, and his entire family is dead. However, one of them has power over ghosts. And even if being dead seriously sucks sometimes, Klaus is going to be there for his brother.“ Complete, 10 Works & 257,180 Words.

Your Bones are Held Together (By Your Nightmares), by VeteranKlaus (Mature) “Brushing aside the fact that Klaus just saved the entire world, the siblings all decide to start making an effort to heal old wounds and ensure that the Apocalypse does not come back to for round two. Klaus is a little distracted with his recent resurrection and how it seems to differ from every other one, and the answer as to why makes itself clear soon enough.” Zombie Klaus, Darkfic, In-Progress (with a prequel), 8/11 Chapters & 31,546 Words. (tw: cannibalism)

Does it Matter (It's Klaus) series, by Papapaldi (Teen and Up) “Dave doesn’t die in the war and Klaus has no reason to leave the past. Fifty-one years on and he finds himself back at the time he left the world he knew, now eighty years old. He decides to pay his siblings a visit.“ Dark Klaus, Complete, 2 Works & 42,726 Words.

And When I Look In My Window, So Many Different People To Be, by ObliqueOptimism (Not Rated) “If you were to go looking for Klaus, you wouldn't look to the alleys where drugs are bought, or to a rave where you could lose yourself in dance, no. No, you would look to his garden full of protective herbs, to his bedroom at three in the morning where he tends to make magic amulets. Klaus grew into his power, both as a witch, and as the Séance.“ Witch Boy Klaus, In-Progress, 3/4 Chapters & 19,046 Words.

Barmecide, by Nemainofthewater (Teen and Up) “/ˈbɑːmɪsʌɪd/: Illusory or imaginary and therefore disappointing. Originating from the early 18th century: from Arabic Barmakī, the name of a prince in the Arabian Nights' Entertainments, who gave a beggar a feast consisting of ornate but empty dishes. January 1st 2007. A tragedy that wipes out an entire family. All except Klaus.” In-Progress, 11/? Chapters & 15,202 Words.

Apple of my Eye, by TheArchaeologist (Mature) “"I mean, was I really young when I had you? Like, sixteen? Like, young and terribly misguided?" The AU in which Five is Klaus' son.” In-Progress, 4 Words & 129,116 Words.

Underwater, by allandnothing (Teen and Up) “He didn’t stop talking, murmuring soft words of reassurance every once in a while. They were mostly nonsensical and unnecessary, but listen. He was currently freeing a living, breathing merman from a fishing net he had somehow gotten tangled up in, and there was a serious possibility that he might die. If he didn’t tell himself that everything was going to be all right he was going to lose his goddamn mind. Or, Dave's average day at the lighthouse gets sidetracked when he stumbles across a merman tangled up in a fishing net, panting, bleeding, and ridiculously pissed off by the whole situation.” Merman AU, Complete, 10 Chapters & 53,374 Words.

Like Real People Do series, by ObliqueOptimism (Not Rated) “Vanya got a call from the hospital, Klaus had harmed himself while in rehab. She decided then and there to be there for him. Together they heal, grow, become the family they'd never been, and change the future in immeasurable ways.“ Deaf Klaus, In-Progress, 5 Works & 33,651 Words.

Legwarmers, by anielle (Teen and Up) “They all like to tease him about Dave. Dave is also up there, on Klaus’ favorites list. He’s from out of town, also a traveling performer. He’s supposed to be a dreamboat. The character is. It’s good casting. If you’re into hot, strong, talented dancer types with shoulders as broad as the humor in a nineties laugh track sitcom and a smile like lighting a match. Well, alright, the thing about the shoulders is not something Tchaikovsky wrote, but it’s implied in the text. In the score. The point is that it’s purely professional that Klaus has noticed the shoulders. Dave’s shoulders. Klaus has noticed.” Ballet AU, Complete, 7 Chapters & 8,752 Words.

[fatestemptress]

Overwhelming Alternatives - Part 1 of 3

Summary: Jensen Ackles loves women.  The way they smell.  The way they taste.  The way their hips sway when they walk away from him, looking back with that knowing look in their eyes.  Hell, he can’t even look at one of his best friends, Y/N, without picturing her naked.

So can someone please explain to him why he’s fantasizing about his co-worker Jared Padalecki?

Created for @spnkinkbingo

Square Filled: Sexuality Crisis

Warnings: Smut. Lots and lots of smut.  Masturbation. Porn watching. MMF. 18+ only!

Pairings: Jensen Ackles x Jared Padalecki; Eventually Jensen x Y/N X Jared

Word Count On this Chapter: 5,300 or so

A/N: Hiiiiii!  Its been sooo long and I have missed so many wonderful fics out there.  I am dying to catch up!  I’ve had this fic sitting in my drafts and it’s finally ready to post.  This will eventually be a threesome, so if that’s not your thing please be forewarned. The other two chapters of this will fill some of my other kink bingo squares.

Please note, this is unbeta’d.  Any and all grammatical errors are mine.  (And I’m sure there are PLENTY. :))

"Fuck Jen!  Hold still would ya'?!"

"I'm trying but your big sausage fingers keep pinching me!"

Jensen Ackles could practically hear the smirk coming from behind him as his co-star and best friend Jared Padalecki rubbed at the fake blood caught under the collar of his shirt behind his neck.  

And he desperately hoped one of his favorite people in the world couldn't feel the shudder of his body as his fingers dipped into the sensitive top part of his spine. The tingles quickly spread out into the wide set of his shoulders and down into his fingertips making them itch with the need to reach behind him and grab Jared by the hip and bring his full body against his back.

FUCK.

He needed to stop this nonsense.  He wasn't gay.  He didn't like guys.  In fact, he LOVED women.  The way they smelled.  They way they tasted.  They way they whined into his ear when he was balls deep with their ankles around his neck.

Annnnnnnd he needed to stop that freight train of thought as his already half hard dick started filling out into a full blown, humiliating, hard on, in front of the remaining crew on set.

"Allright, allright Jay.  The rest'll come out when I get in the shower back in my trailer.  I just didn't want it dripping down my back."

And damned if that didn't just bring unwanted (cause they were UNWANTED...right?) images of something alot more pleasant and alot more white dripping down his back........

Jared let out a high pitched laugh as he playfully massaged his fingers into Jensen's neck, "Wasn't it nice and warm though, Jen?"

With a deep clearing of his throat, side eye and a conspicuous adjustment of his jeans, Jensen reached for his jacket and slung it on, "I won't even dignify that with an answer.  So uh, I'll see you in a little while?  We still on for Madden?"

Jared flipped his hair out of his eyes as he also reached for his coat, seemingly oblivious to his friends discomfort,"Yeah, sure thing.  Gotta shower and then I'll meet you at your trailer in about an hour."

With a quick fist pound and a wave to the few people on set, Jensen and Jared parted ways as they made their way to their respective trailers.  It had been a long day with an early 4:00 AM call but production issues had them calling it quits at 5:00 PM.  

But despite the hectic schedule, two and a half seasons into the show "Supernatural", Jensen was still pumped to come to work everyday.  It definitely helped that everyone on set truly did get along and it was a blessing that he and his co-star had gotten so close, so fast.

What didn't help was the increasing drive to see Jared's cock that had somehow, someway meandered into his every waking moment.  A drive that he had never, not once, had from another man.  And he had been hit on pretty frequently over his career being an actor and having, what he'd been told, were the sweetest dick-sucking lips some of them had ever seen.

But regardless of all that, the only thing he had wanted to eat was a nice, wet pussy.  He loved that shit.  Savored it.  And never, not once, had he ever tried to replace it with a dick.

Until Jared.

Jensen sighed in frustration as he dressed in a pair of black sweats, sans underwear, and a white t-shirt, after his long, hot shower, where he had deliberately denied himself even a quick, rub and tug.

He wasn't gay dammit.  And he wasn't going to start giving into these dark emotions that had been slowly increasing over the past two and half years.  

Fucking Jared.

And his big shoulders.

And solid abs.

And his goofy hair.

And his fucking dimples.

And those ridiculous yellow-green eyes.....

.....that practically sparkled at him whenever he laughed at some sarcastic comment Jensen threw his way.

Fuck but he needed to get laid.  

And fast.  

It had been three long months since he last sunk his dick into a warm willing body and that had been from a one night stand at a random bar in Downtown Vancouver.  Despite the success of the show, they were still relatively unknown enough that it was easy to go out without getting bombarded by fans.  But both of them were still careful with who they took home.  

Crazy sometimes wore a pretty face and a hot body.

Just as Jensen had settled into his deep, fluffy couch with the remote in his hand, his phone rang and a sweet smile and sexy eyes looked up at him from the picture on his cell.  

With a smile of his own, Jensen picked up the phone, "Hey Gorgeous.  Whats doin'?"

"Hey, Ackles," Y/N chirped into his ear,  "What's cookin'?"

Y/N Y/L/N was the Production Coordinator on the show and sometimes Jensen thought her job was the hardest of them all, practically running the ship behind the scenes, managing all the Production Assistants and dealing with all the whining that comes with it.  Even though they had a good crew, people were still human and lord knows they needed someone to bitch to when they felt they weren't being appreciated.  But Y/N handled it all with grace and a firm hand.  She was respected by everyone on set and, if Jensen was being honest with himself, everyone, male and females included, were already half in love with her.  

Jensen was lucky to call her one of his closest friends......and if he sometimes pictured her naked, well, it was only natural.  She was beautiful, intelligent and sarcastic as hell and he was by no means a saint.

"Waitin' on Jared to finish conditioning his hair.  He's gonna come over and get his ass kicked in Madden."

Y/N let out a husky laugh in his ear and Jensen shifted as his dick twitched at the sexy sound.  Maybe he should have considered underwear.

"So another two hours then?"  She deadpanned.

"Nah.  I think deep conditioning was yesterday.  He should be here soon."

"Ha!  Okay,"  Y/N let out a slight sigh in his ear and it sounded almost melancholy.

"Hey, whats wrong?  You okay?"

"Yeah....I mean....yeah I'm fine.  It's just....I broke up with Chad."

Jensen's ears perked up at the name of Y/N's, now, ex-boyfriend, "Wow, I'm, uh, really sorry to hear that, Honey."

Y/N let out a snort, "No, you're fucking not.  I know you hated him.  You made it pretty clear every time you saw him."

With a chuckle, Jensen shrugged, "You're right.  I did fucking hate him.  He didn't deserve you. He was a jerk who was starting to become a possessive asshole.  And his name was Chad.  It's almost a pre-requisite that douche bags are named Chad.  But, uh, why did you finally see the light?"

There was silence on the other end for a a bit before she answered, "He, um, tried to tell me that I was getting too close to you and Jared and that I needed to stop being friends with you outside of work.  So I told him to fuck off and take a hike."

Jensen let out a snort of his own, "That's my girl,"  At the continued silence, he cleared his throat slightly,  "Are you okay?  I mean, listen, even though I hated the guy, I'm not the one who's gotta be with him.  You know I'll support you no matter what and I don't want to be the reason you're not with someone that you maybe....love-"

"Yeah, no.  There wasn't any love there,"  She quickly interrupted before heaving another sigh, "I was just....I dunno...lonely I guess?  The hours we work are brutal and he was,  you know, around.  Whatever, what's done is done and honestly no ones gonna tell me I cant hang with my two favorite pain in the asses."

Jensen didn't acknowledge the thrill that ran through him at her words.  He was just gonna ignore the hum of content that made him smile.  She was his friend, (hot, sexy, beautiful friend), "Do you wanna come over and hang with us?  Take your mind off of things?"

"Thanks.  I may take you up on that later on tonight.  I'll text you."

"I still got a bottle of Stoli Razz here from last time if you're interested in getting obliterated."  

"Ahhh, Ackles.  You always know just what I need.  Talk soon."

With a smile and a goodbye, Jensen ended the call.  Since he'd started talking to Y/N on a more personal level about a year ago, she had been with Jerk-off-Chad.  And despite his sexual attraction to her, he'd always kept her in his off limits category.  Even without her having a boyfriend, he didn't want to jeopardize what they had.  He respected her way too much for that.

So then why did he have a sudden vision of her on her back while he licked between her legs?

Fuuuuck he realllly needed to get laid.

First Jared and now Y/N.

Both people he loved and cared for deeply as friends.  And his perverted mind was making them into sexual conquests.

Maybe a quick rub and tug was just what the doctor ordered.

With a quick glance at the time, Jensen realized he still had a good twenty minutes before he could expect Jared to knock on his trailer door.  Plenty of time to relieve some of the ache his too full balls were giving him.

He quickly pulled his lap top over from its resting place on the side table next to his couch and brought up one of his favorite porn sites.  (Yes, he had favorites and if you asked him he'd tell you he had his go-to videos categorized and in corresponding folders.  Fuck anyone's opinion.  He was twenty-eight, almost twenty-nine with no steady girlfriend.  His hand rarely left his dick when he was alone.)  

In a rush, he picked a random video that looked good and pressed play before placing it back on the side table with the screen facing him.  A deep moan drifted from the speakers as he saw a girl kneeling in front of a huge dick before she swallowed it down in one gulp, lovingly rubbing the balls underneath.  Another loud moan drifted from the speakers.

Shit.  Way too loud.  No need to have one of the crew walk by his trailer and have a story to tell the others tomorrow morning.  

Quickly, Jensen reached over for his ear buds and plugged them in before setting his phone to vibrate and placing it next to him so he could feel it.  Jared would text before he came over.  He always did.

Reaching down, Jensen wrapped a hand over the slowly rising bulge in his sweatpants and bit his lip.  He caressed the head through his pants and was glad the pants were black.  Wet spots on the crotch of grey pants were never a good look.  

And the close ups of the chick's wet pussy and spit slicked swollen mouth were making his cock start doing a steady drip-drip.

He pulled his shirt up over the flat panes of his stomach before squeezing his cock and adjusting it so it lay underneath the band of his pants, the swollen head peaking out of the top as he brought his thumb around the wetness, coating it before letting out a moan of his own.  He liked to tease himself.  Draw it out a little bit before the end result.

"Fuck baby," Big-dick guy said on a gasp from his place on a brown couch, "Suck it.  Yeah...just like that."

The blue eyed blond on her knees let out a whine before releasing the cock with a pop, "So big," She said as she rapidly stroked him from root to tip, "I don't think I can suck this all by myself."  

"Mmmm,"  Big-dick hummed with a dirty grin, "Lucky for us we got some help."

Well,shit.  He had picked a threesome video without even knowing it.  Two chicks sucking on one dick?  Every. Guys. Fantasy.  Bring it on.

The camera panned back into the guys lap as the blonde licked up the side of his cock and a shaggy dark haired head bent down and took the guys balls into his mouth.

Well that was a shorter hair-cut than he was expecting on a chick....

The blonde reached down and grabbed the head of hair and brought the lips of the other person to hers, tongues dangling in the air, "Hey baby..." She said on a breath, before bringing the tip of the big dick to her partners mouth and tapping it against the pursed lips surrounded by a five o'clock shadow-

Wait.

What?

Five O'clock shadow?

And to his surprise and wide eyed gaze, he watched as the dude on screen sucked down the cock in front of him with a deep growl, his shaggy hair being moved out of the way by the blonde as she waited her turn.

And instead of his dick deflating into nothing, he let out a noise he would later deny to himself as he ripped his cock out of his sweats and started rapidly stroking his dick as the guy on screen let out slutty noises and tongued down the other dudes dick before sloppily kissing the blonde with the cock in between their lips.

"Fuck, I love this dick," The guy gasped, "Want it all the time."

The blonde giggled and the camera panned to where she was running her finger around his puckered hole, "You want it here baby?"

And as the guy on his knees let out a groan, threw his head back and made his dark hair flutter around his face, Jensen let out the slightest of squeaks as he pulled roughly on his rock hard cock and he felt the pull in his balls become an onslaught of come,"Fuuuuuuuck!"

Sticky white liquid shot out of his cock and onto his stomach as he quickly realized that the reason he came so hard and so long was cause the guy on the screen was a look alike of the guy currently standing with his mouth open at his doorway.

"Jared!"

Shit.

With another squeak, Jensen slammed the laptop shut, ripped his ear buds out and quickly stuffed himself back into his sweatpants before standing up on shaky legs.

Jared blinked at him wide eyed and pink cheeked as he closed his mouth and swallowed hard, closing the trailer door softly behind him, "Uhhhh, Dude, you ever, uh, consider locking your door, if you're gonna jerk the chicken?"

"Dude, you ever consider fucking calling first before you just come over?  Or maybe knocking on the fucking door?"

"I DID knock on the fucking door but you obviously had your dirty movie on too loud.  AND I TEXTED before I came, like I always do!"

Jensen gave him an incredulous look, "No. You didn't," He shot out as he grabbed up his phone from the couch, "I would have felt the.....oh,"  Jensen gave him a sheepish glance, "Looks like I put it on silent not vibrate."

Jared's lips twitched into what could have been a smile, "Uh huh,"  Jared casually pushed passed Jensen's stiff form and plopped himself on the abandoned couch.  He spread his arms across the back of it as he glanced up at Jensen through his lashes,  "Sooooo, if I hadn't gotten here when I did, would that have been the, uh, next thing you would have pulled out?"

Jensen's eyebrows drew together in confusion, as his humiliation continued to burn through him, "Pulled what out?"

Jared bit his bottom lip, obviously trying not to laugh out loud, "Never mind.  Man, its fine.  Stop looking at me like you wanna crawl into a hole.  We ALL fucking do it.  Hell, I jerked off twice in the shower before coming here."

Ignoring the pull of desire in his belly at Jared's words, Jensen groaned out loud and threw himself down onto the other end of the couch and rubbed his hands over his face, "So fucking embarrassing," He muttered into his fingers, refusing to look over at Jared.

A small squeaking sound, slid through the air and sounds of heavy breathing filled the awkward space.

"Yeah baby, just like that.  Fuck me with your fingers."

Jensen's head shot up as Jared let out a deep belly laugh and stared at Jensen's re-opened laptop at the kneeling guy on the screen getting his pink hole finger fucked by the blonde chick next to him as he sucked and licked the cock in front of him.

"DUUUUUDE, this is some kinky shit."

"What the fu-? Jay!  Why would you turn that back on?!"  Jensen threw himself over Jared's lap, ignoring the loud laughter falling out Jared's mouth and frantically pressed buttons until it stopped playing and slammed the laptop shut once again.  He whipped his head to the side and glared at the wide grin inches from his face, "You're an asshole, you know that?"

Jared winked at Jensen as he shifted his hips underneath him, poking Jensen in the stomach with something, "You're taking this way too seriously, Man."

Jensen looked down into the small space between him and Jay before slowly leaning back into his own spot on the couch.  He couldn't have felt what he thought he did....did he?

With a clearing of his throat, he swallowed and sat back as he ran his hands through his hair, "This is fucking embarrassing!"  He repeated.

Shrugging, Jared leaned his head into the back of the couch and rolled his head so it was next to Jensen's, "Soooooo, does this mean....I mean...are you...gay?"

Jensen's eyes widened in alarm as his heart started pounding frantically, "NO!  I'm not fucking gay, Jay!  Did you not see the chick in the movie?  I didn't realize until it was too late that the guy was going to be...involved like that."

Jared sent a sympathetic look at Jensen's panicked gaze, "You know Jen, it's okay if you are.  I'm not judging.  Like, at all-"

"Jesus, Jared!  I'm telling you I'm not-"

"-cause I've swung both ways before soooo.."

"-gay.....what?"

Jensen blinked stupidly at Jared's soft smile and felt like he might pass out from sheer terror mixed with immediate curiosity.

Jared sat up and placed his elbows on his knees before lacing his fingers together, "I'm...I mean I guess...you could call me...bisexual,"  He shrugged before running his fingers through his hair and Jensen could see a slight tremble despite Jared's calm tone.

"Have you...um...had...you know.."

Another dazzling smile was sent Jensen's way, "Have I ever fucked a guy before?"  At Jensen's nod, Jared shrugged, "Yep.  Both catcher and pitcher."

"Jesus."

"What?  You know if you cant talk about gay sex, you shouldn't be doing gay sex."  He said with a mock serious look.

"Yeah, yeah.  Well, I'm not.  Doing it.  I mean.  With guys.  And lately, not with girls either,"  Jensen ran a hand against the back of his neck, "Maybe that's the problem.  I'm backed up to the point where my brain is floating in sperm and stupidity."

Jared laughed again before placing a hand against the back of Jensen's neck and squeezing it, "Jen, again, not judging.  But, uh, coming that hard?  Usually signifies that shit is turning you on.  And then some."

Jensen gaped at Jared, "How fucking long were you standing there?"

"Long enough to wonder if you were gonna provide a cigarette after the show."

"Dude."

With another squeeze to his neck, Jared smirked, "What can I say, it was seriously hot."

Jensen's poor heart started pounding at an even faster clip, "You...you thought that was hot?"

Jared's smirk dropped and a look that Jensen had never seen before took it's place, "Come on, Man.  Have you seen yourself in the mirror?  Can you really blame me for thinking that way about you?"

Jensen swallowed.  Hard. "What....what way?"

Jared licked his bottom lip and bit it, "How curious are you about this?  I don't want to go down a road with you and you wake up the next morning and decide you cant work with me or you don't want to be friends.  I value our friendship, Man.  Truly.  It would kill me not to-."

"Yeah," Jensen interrupted with a soft smile, "It would kill me too."

With a smile of his own, Jared let go of Jensen's neck and sat back, "Sooo, you wanna finish watching the movie?"

Was it possible for stomachs to dip right outta your body?  Cause that's what was happening to Jensen's.

"I-uh, I mean, if you, uh, wanna, I mean..."

Taking pity on Jensen's stuttering, Jared reached under the side table and pulled out the bottle of Glenfiddich whiskey he knew was stored there, "Drink first?"

"Fuck yeah."

:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~~:~:~

The first two shots burned on the way down.  By the time they were both nursing the third drink, Jensen was feeling the edges of his anxiety start to float away and Jared was sitting closer to him on the couch.

They talked a little more about Jared and his previous male conquests.  ("They were pretty.  And hot.  I have a hard time saying no to pretty and hot.")

And they spoke of how he may not advertise his sexuality but he wasn't ashamed of it either. ("Pussy and dick both make me come.  Soooo, why not?")

By the time they reached the point where Jensen felt brave enough to let Jay turn on the laptop, he was sporting some chub thinking of his best friend in these compromising positions.  

And if Jay's gaze was any indication, it was very noticeable.  

Fucking sweatpants.  

Clearing his throat, Jared pressed play and placed it on the couch in between them.

"Suck that cock.  Fuck yeah.  So fucking hot."  The blonde said as she continued to finger fuck the dark haired guys ass before quickly adding a second finger.  The blonde slapped one of the guys ass cheeks with her free hand before using the same hand to separate them, "Look how pretty.  Can't wait for you to take that monster up in here.  Gonna make you eat my pussy while you take it."

Jensen's head was swimming as a deep pulse of lust shot into his stomach and straight to his dick.  His mind was quickly replacing the images on screen with him being the one sitting on the couch, running his hand through Jared's hair as he sucked his cock with major enthusiasm.

Fuck, could he really be this hard, this fast?

Sending a surreptitious glance toward Jared, Jensen took another sip of his drink and adjusted himself on the couch, trying to sit in such a way that his wood wasn't so obvious.

He was terribly unsuccessful.

Especially considering he had looked into Jared's lap and saw a massive boner laying against the side of his leg, plainly visible in the track pants he was wearing.

This time, Jensen had to bite his lip to keep in the moan that threatened to fly out of his throat.  

"You, uh,  you okay?"

Jensen's head shot up at Jared's deep baritone and he swallowed at the look of lust making Jared's eyes darken, "I, uh, maybe this wasn't such a good idea..."  He said as he placed his drink on the table next to him.

Jared looked down at the tent in Jensen's sweats, before raising an eyebrow, "You sure about that, Jen?"

At that moment, the dark haired guy on screen let out a loud moan and both of their heads swiveled back to the screen just in time to see him take Big-Dicks cock in his ass.  He swiveled his hip and pushed against Big-Dick before licking up the blondes thigh in front of him, plunging his tongue in her pussy.

"Fuck...." Jared let out before he reached down and squeezed his dick through his pants, "That's fucking hot."

Shit. Shit. Shit.

Watching Jared touch himself through his pants was gonna make Jensen blow his wad straight across the room.  The throbbing in his sweats was becoming unbearable and mixed with the whiskey in his system, he was ready to say fuck it and whip his dick out.

"Deeper.."  The guy on screen begged in between long licks to the blondes pussy, "Deeper, Man.  Yeah, just like that."

Big-Dick obliged and he adjusted himself to give the guy long, hard, deep strokes as his partner let out a groan and lay his head on the blondes thigh; his hard cock swinging between his legs with the pounding he was happily taking.

"You like that baby?" The blonde cooed as she ran her fingers through his hair, "Feels good right?"

"Oh my God," Jensen couldn't help but let out softly as he felt his dick dribble out pre-cum into his pants.

Jared looked up into Jensen's face and shuddered out a breath, "Dude, I'm so fucking horny right now that if I don't take out my dick, its gonna explode in my pants."

Jensen shut his eyes at the shot of want that streaked down his spine, "Shit, Jay.  You're gonna kill me."

"Is that a yes?"

What to do?  Lord knew he was so far gone the room was spinning.  Though the whiskey could've had a hand in that as well.

Instead of answering, Jensen reached into his pants and pulled out his throbbing cock and immediately started stroking it from root to tip.  He was so worked up, his hips involuntarily canted into his grip and he let out a groan and dropped his head onto the back of the sofa letting it loll to the side, facing Jared.

Jensen watched as Jared's eyes widened at the sight in front of him and he started letting out gasping breaths before reaching into his underwear, pulling out his cock (Big-fucking-cock.  Want-it-in-his-mouth-cock) as he pulled down his pants with the other hand.  Jay's eyes rolled into the back of his head as he leaned back against the sofa, inches away from Jensen's gasping mouth.  

"Fuck..."  Jensen whispered as he felt Jared's rapid breaths against his lips.  Immediately, he licked his lower lip trying in vain to catch the taste of his best friend and swallow it down.  He opened his eyes into slits and peered right into yellow-green orbs as he let out a low moan when his cock jerked in his hand.

He was so fucking close....

Jared let out a deep groan in tandem with Jensen, his mouth hanging slightly open as his hand reached down and played with his sack, "Jen....God...the things I wanna do to you..."

Those thick lips were so close to his own, he could practically feel them opening up and taking everything he had to give.  He licked his lips, hoping his tongue would graze against Jared's but instead he felt an answering lick against the tip of his tongue as Jared tentatively rubbed it against his.

"Again...." Jensen groaned, "Please....again."

A sound of complete surrender left Jared's throat as he closed the small distance between their mouths and immediately wrapped his tongue around Jensen's before sucking Jensen's bottom lip into his mouth.  

A bomb went through Jensen's torso and immediately erupted out of his dick as he came so hard his eyes crossed and he moaned long and loud into Jared's mouth causing the other man to moan in return. Come arched through the air and landed right on his t-shirt as he closed his mouth over Jared's and kissed him with deep strokes of his tongue.

"Oh God, oh FUCK!"

The loud scream from the laptop caused both men to separate and look down in time to see the dark haired guy on screen on his back getting plowed by Big-Dick as the blonde sucked down his cock.

"I'm gonna come!" He yelled into the air, "I'm gonna come."

As the blonde lifted her face out of the way, he shot up and onto his chest with loud grunts as the guy who had been fucking him pulled out and helped the blonde lap up the come on his chest.  

A low groan came from Jared, "Ugggghhh, Jen.  Shiiiiit."

Jensen looked to the side just in time to see Jared rip up his T-shirt  just as his red tipped dick erupted onto his now exposed stomach.

It was by far one of the hottest fucking things he had ever seen in his life.

As both men leaned back letting out low gasps, Jensen waited for the awkwardness to settle in.  But nothing happened.   He blinked up at the ceiling of the trailer and tried to trudge up something of the fear that he felt earlier but instead he  just felt....content.

"You okay, Jen?"  

Jensen turned his head to meet Jared's slightly panicked eyes.

Jared gulped as Jensen didn't immediately answer,  "I mean...are we okay?"

Taking in that strong jawline and those beautiful eyes, Jensen smiled, "Yeah.  Yeah, Jay.  We're good."

Letting out a sigh of relief, Jared closed the laptop between them and placed it on the table before closing the small distance between their bodies.  As Jensen felt the heat radiating off of Jared's body bleed into own, he let his eyes slide down to the curve of Jared's lips and couldn't help but bring his mouth to his and press a soft kiss against them.  He felt Jared smile before the taller man deepened the kiss and slid one of those massive hands of his across Jensen's t-shirt covered stomach.  With a groan into Jensen's mouth. he squeezed at the side of Jensen's waist before meandering his fingers up his chest towards his neck before suddenly stopping and looking down at his hand.

"What's wrong?"  Jensen on a breath.

Biting his lip, Jared brought up his shiny fingers, "Dude, you either have a talent for shooting long distance or you really were backed up,"

Jensen's eyes widened, "Is that my-"

"Come?  Yep," Jared opened his mouth and inserted his fingers before sucking them deep and releasing them with a pop and a smirk, "Still warm too."

Another dip in his belly as Jensen tried to decide how he felt about watching his best friend lick his come off his fingers.  When said friend, winked at him and bit his bottom lip, Jensen decided he was abso-fucking-lutley okay with it, "Fuck.  You're gonna kill me."

Jared hummed deep in his throat and leaned his head in to kiss Jensen again when a loud knock sounded at the door.

"Yo!  Open up the door!  You two fools better not have drank all the alcohol."

Shit!  Y/N!

With panicky eyes and fumbling hands righting clothes, Jensen cleared his throat and quickly made it to the door after looking back to make sure Jared was decent.

"Hey!"  Y/N said with a bright smile when the door opened, "Sorry I took so long.  Crisis with Christy happened.  Again!"  Y/N said referring to one of the PA's on staff as she made her way around Jensen and to his small kitchenette, "But I brought pizza!"  She lifted the box in her hands before placing it on the table, "Hope you guys are hungry."

Jared and Jensen shared a heavy look before Jared answered, "Yeah, I'd say we worked up a pretty decent appetite today."

Y/N looked around the trailer and took a deep breath, swinging around making the short skirt she had on flounce in the air, "It smells like bad decisions in here, Ackles.  You really need to clean up after you bang random chick number sixty-nine."

Jared let out a high pitched laugh as Jensen pursed his lips at his friend, "I did not bang any..chick in here. Thank you very much."

Y/N shrugged off her jacket and placed it on the back of a chair before plopping down next to Jared on the couch, "Then you need to figure out which sock is lying around and still hiding the evidence of your last....activities."

"Y/N!"

"Just sayin'."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~**~

Tagging some peeps that may be interested.  Let me know if its not your thing and you’d rather not be tagged.

@thoughtslikeaminefield  @maddiepants @coffee-obsessed-writer @pisces-cutie @idreamofplaid @tumbler-tidbits @glassjacket @boondoctorwho @spnkinkbingo