#all these soldiers should be exterminated asap

[chaiaurchaandni]

israeli terrorists invade Palestinian classrooms, destroy students' certificates, scrawl threats on the boards and use UN schools as a base

every zionist accusation is a confession

[returnn-of-the-mac]

Idk if you’re accepting asks or still doing this, or if you’ve done something similar but if you are. Could you possibly do the companions reacting to like in game glitches (ex: bodies going flying, enemies randomly just standing there not attacking, objects randomly rotating in the air, bodies going through the floor, etc, etc)

I couldn’t decide on which glitches I wanted to do, so I attached some gifs. If y’all want a part 2 I will gladly make it because I had a lot of fun with this one. Enjoy! (Dislclaimer: I don’t own any of these gifs)

FO4 Companions React: In-Game Glitches

Preston: Um…bodies aren’t supposed go flying like that.

Deacon: I believe I can fly~ ♪

MacCready: Team Rocket’s blasting off again!

Piper: Holy shit! What just happened!?

Hancock: Home run!

Codsworth: I don’t think the Brotherhood soldiers will be amused, [sir/mum]…

Cait: Bastard deserved it.

X6-88: [confused] Something is awry in the matrix.

Nick: [annoyed] Now you’ve done it. [looking around] We best get off this aircraft ASAP. I don’t fancy being beaten to a pile of scrap metal.

Longfellow: Does this guy have hollow bones or what?

Strong: Strong impressed!

Gage: *wheeze-laughs uncontrollably*

Curie: I am not quite underztanding ze physics. Zis makes no zense!

Danse: [horrified, running to the railing] ELDER! [looking back at Sole, fuming] WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?!?

…

Nick: Ever heard of Michael Jackson? I found an old holotape with some of his music videos on it. I thought it was neat, so I’ve been practicing. What do you think?

Preston: Jesus Christ, Valentine!

Piper: [concerned] Nick, you’re gonna blow out your knees…or joints…or screws…or whatever keeps you together!

X6-88: Ah yes, Smooth Criminal. A true masterpiece.

Curie: Ahhh zat can’t be good for ze joints…

Codsworth: [concerned] Should you be doing that, Nick?

Danse: [jealous] Figures the synth can effortlessly lean like that…

Cait: Good stuff!

MacCready: Nick are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay, Nick?

Deacon: *starts moonwalking behind Nick*

Longfellow: I ain’t much of a dancer.

Strong: That hurt robot bones!?

Gage: [attempts to lean] [takes a tumble] FUCK!

Hancock: Hee hee!

…

Preston: All of the settlements…they all need our help…settlements…settlements…I’m so overwhelmed!!

Piper: Calm down, Preston! It’ll be alright!

Longfellow: It’s not like you’re the one going out there to help them.

Codsworth: Sturges! [hovering around] Sturges! We have a situation!

Danse: Deep breath, Preston. We can tackle this together. One settlement at a time.

MacCready: Preston, buddy! You’re not gonna get too far if you’re *clears throat* bed ridden! Haha!…no?

Nick: You have got to calm down, my friend. You can’t get anything done in this state. First, let’s get you out of this mattress.

Curie: Monsieur Preston is unwell…

Strong: Human defective?

X6-88: I heard there’s a ghoul problem in the Slog. We can exterminate them.

Deacon: [joking] Are you a ghost!? How are you doing that? [comforting] It’ll be alright, buddy.

Gage: Too bad, so sad. We’re gonna conquer the settlements while you’re stuck.

Cait: Yer makin me dizzy spinnin around like that.

Hancock: [drops chems on mattress] Homie, you need some Jet.

[osakaso5]

La Danse Macabre

Episode 7

Chapter Index

7-1: A Proud Pursuer (1)

Reue: It's kind of noisy around here. What's wrong?

Leiden: Gahaha. Something interesting happened while we were sleeping, Commander.

Reue: Ugh...

Reue: That's highly doubtful. I know you boys like to cause me trouble. Don't think I haven't noticed.

Schau: Qual went down. Probably to go after the Celestial.

Schau: He took a few of his men with him. Just like I predicted.

Reue: What..?

Reue: ...Uugh... Give me a break...

Leiden: What do we do? We can't just let him go like that, can we?

Reue: Hmm...

Reue: Hum. Leiden, go get Qual back here ASAP. You may take up to 10 troops with you.

Leiden: Roger that.

Leiden: Phew, been a while since I got to go down below! Hopefully there'll be lots of action!

Schau: You brute.

Leiden: The Ark's just too peaceful for me. All work and no play makes Leiden a dull boy..!

Schau: Have fun.

Reue: Schau, you'll have to help pacify the citizens!

Schau: Sure, whatever.

Leiden: Good luck trying to pretend like you give a damn.

Schau: Shut up...

Reue: Sigh... Qual.

Reue: Tsk... Who gave you permission to make more work for me? 

- - - -

Qual: So this is the land below... I've never seen it before.

Qual: ...How ugly.

Unity Order Troop: Captain Qual, we'd best head for Unity Order's Surface base before we go anywhere else.

Unity Order Troop: The soldiers down here are regularly in conflict with the locals, so they should have data on Rebellion.

Qual: Right...

Qual: ...Sorry for dragging you all into this. For making you disobey your orders.

Unity Order Troop: You've always been good to us, sir. We find the actions of the lowlifes who took the Celestial just as unforgivable as you do.

Unity Order Troop: Exactly. Bending the rules for you is no trouble at all.

Qual: Thank you... Very well, then. We must absolutely bring the Celestial back.

Unity Order Troop: Please just take the blame for this once Commander Reue catches us, alright?

Qual: Hahaha, of course. But don't you worry. As long as we bring the Celestial back, I'm sure he'll overlook our transgressions.

???: ........

7-2: A Proud Pursuer (2)

Qual: Everything is in ruins...

Unity Order Troop: Not to mention it smells awful... It's hard to believe humans could survive in a place like this...

Qual: Right. And, to bring the Celestial to a place such as this... is unforgivable.

[Bang]

Unity Order Troop: Uaargh!

Qual: What..!?

Unity Order Troop: C-captain! Hostiles approaching!

Qual: Are you alright!?

Unity Order Troop: ...Ugh, I'm fine. The bullet didn't hit anywhere fatal...

Surface Dweller: Looks like we really did find a bunch of Ark suckers. This'll be easy.

Surface Dweller: You must have a real big ego if you think you can prance around with a group that small.

Qual: ...Who are you worms?

Unity Order Troop: T-they're most likely members of one of the Surface's resistance groups. There are too many of them... It would be wise to retreat for the time being.

Qual: ...Retreat?

Qual: Fool. What man retreats at the face of insects?

Unity Order Troop: Captain..!

Surface Dweller: Don't let 'em get away! Press on!

Unity Order Troop: Ugh... Here they come!

[Thud]

Qual: Stand back..!

[Clang]

Surface Dweller: What!?

Qual: Hmph!

[Thud]

Surface Dweller: Aargh!

Surface Dweller: He's fast...! Keep your distance! Stay out of his range!

Qual: Hmph... So, how many of you are there? ...Ten... no, just under twenty.

Qual: Swarming about, without even a shred of dignity.

Qual: Worms, crawling all over the ground...

[Thud]

Surface Dweller: Ugh!

Qual: In taking mankind's hope, the Celestial, you've sinned. Now atone with your lives.

Surface Dweller: Huh? What're ya talking about..!?

Qual: Silence.

[Thud]

Surface Dweller: Wait... We dunno anything about no Celestial!

Qual: I don't care.

[Thud]

Qual: When one insect bites you, it's only natural to want to crush all the other ones as well.

Unity Order Troop: .........

Qual: Proud soldiers of the Unity Order!

Unity Order Troops: Y-yessir!

Qual: You have nothing to fear. These things may look like us, but they're nothing more than vermin.

Qual: Filthy and repugnant as they are, I understand why you may not want to so much as look at them. ...And their insignificant existence.

Qual: They're no match for us.

Unity Order Troop: Sir!

Surface Dweller: You... you bastards!!!

Qual: Exterminate them!

Unity Order Troops: Yessir!

[Ratatat]

[Clang]

Qual: Wait for me, Celestial. I'm coming to save you.

Qual: I'll protect you. 

To be continued...

[mass-effect-galaxy]

Joan’s Song 4: Eden Prime

Ashley Williams had never seen a ship like that. She was just leaving Dr. Manuel’s surgery. And there, it was: some kind of giant metal hot-dog hovering over the camp of the 212. That ship now started bombarding Ashley’s men with blocks of metal. One smashed Koslowski. What the hell...? Those blocks were folded robots, geth! The real attack was just starting. The geths ‘unfolded’ amidst the marines and slaughtered the humans. 212 never stood a chance. 

On a reflex, Ashley hit the security lock of Dr. Manuel’s office and locked him in. She used her Lancer rifle to open fire. Not a panicked barrage that would have hit nothing and just overheated the weapon, but aimed bursts of ten shots as she was drilled to do. Each burst hit and Ashley was able to take out some geths before the machines reacted to her. Flashlight heads turned in her direction and she had to jump behind Dr. Manuel’s sky car to not get hit as the geth returned fire. The robots made some kind of hydraulic sound when moving towards her. Approaching the sky car they were communicating with metallic stuttering. That sound reminded Ashley of the faulty vibrator she had bought while being stationed on Arvuna. She changed to her Storm shotgun. Time to get personal. Ashley came up behind the car and gunned down the synthetics with quick aimed shots. She was hit several times herself but that didn’t stop her from firing. 

It was over. Ashley launched Intercom to call HQ, however, the comm was nothing but a cacophony of distress calls from all over the planet. Pointless. She sent a text message over extranet to the Fifth Fleet instead. “Eden Prime under attack. Upper dig-site secured. 212 exterminated. Requesting reinforcements. Chief Williams.”

 “The Arcturus Prime Relay is in range, Commander. The captain wants to see you.” “Thank you, Joker.” Joan Shepard already had changed into armor when the call came. She found the situation rather odd: Captain Anderson was no space-ship commander but a celebrated special-forces officer. Shepard herself was no engineer but a top elite infantry grunt. However, both had been freshly assigned to the Normandy to test its prototype stealth drive. The brass could hardly expect them to give more than a “works” or “doesn’t work”-statement on it. And there was Nihlus, a turian spectre. Even though the Normandy was a turian-human design, the crew was human only. All this didn’t make much sense. Maybe, the Council wanted to appoint either her or Anderson as a spectre. Rumors had it that, after C-Sec, humans would be admitted into the spectres too. And why not her: youngest commander in Alliance history, N7, and a legend at the age of 29. She took down a thresher maw on Akuze, earned the Star of Terra on Elysium and won on Torfan against impossible odds by sacrificing most of her team.

Torfan. Shepard gently touched Jan’s dog tags before leaving her cabin; a ritual she had started with when coming on to the Normandy. The tags hang on a portrait of Lieutenant Jan Schaeffer. Not a photography but a drawing by Shepard. That was her talent. She couldn’t sing, or dance, or rhyme, or handicraft things. And she certainly was at war with every computer in the galaxy. A drawing was Shepard’s way to express herself. She had painted Jan with dark-brown hair instead of the red hair she had when they met that day before Torfan. Shepard believed that to have been her natural color. It was odd. They had known each other for barely a day when Jan had died in Shepard’s arms, but Shepard felt hollow ever since. She always was the love-at-first-sight kind of woman, but she never had experienced a ‘kick’ like the feelings she had when meeting Jan. And then the animals had taken her away. And the man responsible for it got away with an honorable discharge: Major Kyle. 

Captain Anderson and Nihlus were waiting for her in the comm room. Shepard hadn’t met Anderson before this mission. Anderson did, however, serve under her father and was acquainted with her mother, Hannah. Shepard did know Admiral Hackett personally, though. He was her father’s best friend and the Hacketts and Shepards had visited each other quite frequently when Joan was still young. Aunt Karin, Dr. Chakwas, the elder sister of Hannah Shepard, was serving as the Normandy’s medic. The first generation Alliance officers’ corps was one large family. And having the right connections certainly couldn’t hurt.

“Ah, Commander”, Shepard was greeted by Nihlus, “we had been talking about you.” ‘Of course, you have’, thought Shepard. Captain Anderson continued, “Shepard, we are about to go groundside on Eden Prime. You will be in charge of a team supporting Spectre Nihlus. This is a pick-up mission.” Eden Prime? Shepard had spent her holidays there two years ago. It was nice but so boring she reported back for duty three days early. Next time she went to Elysium... “What’s the payload, Captain.” “Our science team has uncovered a prothean beacon”, Anderson said in awe. The Alliance used a stealth frigate and elite soldiers to pick up 50,000 years old junk from the most peaceful colony in human space? What comes next, using a dreadnought for pizza-delivery? “Prothean, Sir?” Shepard asked perplexed. But before Captain Anderson could answer, Joker came in over the comm. “Got a priority message from Fith Fleet HQ, Admiral Hackett.” “Patch him through, Lieutenant.” A holographic Hackett appeared over QEC. 

“Captain, we are receiving distress calls from Eden Prime. I understand Normandy will be there shortly?”. “ETA one hour, Sir. Who’s attacking?” “Unkown. But to our information, the dig site is safe for now. Go groundside ASAP and secure the beacon. That is your top priority. Hackett out.” Nihlus was already leaving the room. Shepard was about to go as well but Anderson held her back. “Shepard, don’t screw this up. Nihlus had been requesting you by name. They are tagging you to be a spectre.” There it was. “You can count on me, Sir.” Shepard left the comm room smiling.

The shore-party was composed of Shepard, Nihlus, Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, a biotic who also doubled as field-medic, and Corporal Jenkins, a sniper with technical skills. While Shepard felt sorry for Jenkins, only NCO in a party with three chieftains, she hadn’t made up her mind on Alenko. Shepard always felt a bit uneasy around biotics. Maybe because they were able to master something she couldn’t even understand. But then again, the same could be said about hackers, doctors, or craftsmen - and those didn’t intimidate her at the least. The Lieutenant obviously was a man of integrity, but Shepard suspected he might be lacking the necessary roughness for this job. Maybe that’s the reason why he had not made it past lieutenant despite his excellent education and obvious abilities.

The team reached the dig-site without incidents. That place, however, clearly had been a battlefield: bodies, both civilians and marines, were lying around. Between them something that looked like destroyed security mecs, even though Shepard wasn’t able to identify the model. “Geth”, mumbled Alenko. Possible. No sign of the beacon. The Commander used gestures to split up the team in order to secure the perimeter. Shepard herself passed a burning sky-car to check a locked container. When she rounded that container, someone grabbed her and pressed a hand on her mouth. From the corner of her eye, Shepard could see that the attacker was a woman in Alliance armor. Her grip was remarkably strong, and before Shepard could fight back, the other woman carefully turned Shepard’s head to the left. Only a few paces away a group of geth was erecting some kind of giant spikes. Damn it, Shepard nearly had run into them. Several humans were held under guard nearby. Shepard could guess where that was going to. She nodded slowly and the other one let her go. The woman already had readied a sniper rifle. Shepard thought of calling for her team, but that certainly would have alarmed the flashlights. She unholstered the Python X sniper rifle on her back and whispered, “On me. Left to right.” And then they started some kind of fast sniping contest. Geths did not panic and usually did not take cover either. After all, they were machines. Their programming caused them to stand and return fire. Worst possible tactics against two snipers. The fight was over before any of the others showed up. 

Shepard was first on her feet and helped the other woman up. “Chief Williams of the 212. I am glad you came, Ma’am.” “Where is the rest of your unit, Chief?” “Dead, Ma’am. They died when...” At this moment, Ashley saw Nihlus. She immediately drew her pistol on him. “What’s with the turian, Ma’am?” “Stand down, Chief”, Shepard said more soothingly than firmly. “This is Nihlus Kryik, a Council Spectre.” Ashley kept her gun pointed on Nihlus. “The turians are behind this attack, Ma’am. I have seen them.” Instinctively, Shepard drew her gun too. Alenko and Jenkins followed. “What’s going on here, Nihlus?”, Shepard demanded to know. Nihlus raised his hands, a truly ‘universal’ gesture. He stayed calm, brought up a picture on the monitor of his omnitool and asked Ashley in his deep, rolling turian voice, “Is that the turian you have seen?” “Exactly. Your pal, chicken?” Shepard took a quick glance of Williams. She squinnied and her carotid was swollen, pumping. She was on the brink of explosion. The Commander should have interfered but Shepard was more curious on where that was going to. “His name is Saren Arterius.”, Nihlus continued ignoring the insult, “he is another spectre. Rouge. I came here to kill him.” “What? You knew he would be here?”, Shepard lowered her gun. Alenko and Jenkins again followed. Williams didn’t. “As I said, Ma’am. The birds are playing tag on our deads. Allowance to shoot?” This came more like an advance notice than a question. As much as Shepard would like to see the other woman kill that turian, she gently touched Ashley’s arm. “It’s okay, Chief. We get it sorted out.”

“Come clean, Nihlius. You knew about this attack?”. Shepard demanded to know “No, not really. We knew that Saren had gone rogue and somehow made the geth to follow him. I was tasked with taking him down, but I lost his trail a few months ago when I run into an asari justicar.” “What?”, that one came from Alenko. “Long story.”, Nihlus continued, “Though, I figured Saren was looking for prothean artifacts. This discovery on Eden Prime posed an opportunity. I was confident, Saren couldn’t resist.” To Shepard this made sense, however, she couldn’t say so in front of the other humans. “You used our civilians as bait? That’s low, Nihlus. You should have warned us”, she said instead, already knowing the answer. “If I had warned the Alliance, Saren wouldn’t have come out of his hiding-hole.” Exactly. "What’s next, Commander”, Lieutenant Alenko demanded to know. “That’s simple, LT. We have our assignment. Chief Williams, this is the dig-site but where is the beacon?” “It was moved to a space-port nearby this morning, Ma’am. We were told the Fleet would be coming to pick it up.” “Right, that would have been us.”, said Shepard. “So, that’s where we’re heading. You coming with us, Nihlus?” “I move faster on my own.”, the turian said and left. Time to move on.

As they approached the port, the marines saw that other colonists had not been as lucky as those they had saved from the geth. The geth had built some kind of parkway by placing spikes left and right along the road. On each spike, a human was impaled. Strangely, those bodies already had started to decay even though their death must have been just a few hours ago. Shepard had stopped counting them when passing number forty-nine and fifty. They were marching in the middle of the road, spikes left and right. No one spoke. When they had reached what seemed to have been the center of that ‘plantation’ a metallic creaking run up and down the road with which all spikes were retracting. The bodies on them started fidgeting. “Oh my God”, Kaidan shouted, “they’re still alive.” Mechanically Shepard was barking orders “Defensive position! Williams right flank! Alenko left flank! Jenkins on my six! Move it, man! Make ready!” This looked like a scene from one of those ancient zombie-movies Shepard had loved to watch in secret when she was twelve. However, in those old movies, the zombies limbed around slowly. These here run at an incredible speed. And this was for real! Ashley had already started firing when Shepard’s adrenaline rush kicked in. Those husks became slower and slower to Shepard. Shooting them now was no problem. Her rifle, on the other hand, didn’t have a “rush” and quickly overheated. Shepard didn’t bother with holstering it on her back but simply dropped it and drew a pistol. With her Cobra X, she gunned down the last four husks coming in her direction.

If Shepard hadn’t been so focused on the enemy in front of her, she might have noticed that there was a considerable gap between Jenkins and Alenko. The Lieutenant could only take down so many husks with his biotics, but at one point Jenkins got swarmed and overrun. In general, Shepard was more “sensible” than other people. And during a rush, her senses were even more refined. That way she was able to feel the husk charging towards her back. She turned around, raised her weapon, shot. It was a mess. Some hundred of those creatures were lying all around. They must have been colonists before but didn’t look human anymore. Jenkins was dead. So was Nihlus: they found him further down the road. He too was swarmed by husks, and on his own, he never had a chance.

The space-port was deserted. No geth, no husks, no Saren. To Shepard's great surprise, the beacon was still there. Why would Saren go such lengths for a prothean relique only to leave it behind? The beacon seemed to be emitting some kind of electrical field. Shepard could feel it, Alenko and Williams not. She carefully touched the beacon. Suddenly the ground under her disappeared and she fell through open space. She screamed but couldn’t hear it. Shepard rushed through star systems, passed suns, planets, and space stations of strange designs. She didn’t recognize any of it. However, in one moment she had passed a station that looked like the Citadel, even though its arms were closed. ‘Why am I not dead?’ She gained more speed when approaching a planet. When Shepard entered its atmosphere, she braced herself to be smashed on the ground. This didn’t happen. Instead, Shepard suddenly was lying on her back gazing at a sky. It had two suns. She felt exhausted but unharmed. Some kind of buzzing was to be heard in the distance. Shepard got up and saw giant metal cockroaches moving between buildings in the distance. They were shooting red beams at something on the ground. She turned around and found herself face to face with an alien. It had four eyes, but was no batarian, blue skin but was no asari. The alien touched Shepard’s forehead with two of its three fingers. She could hear its voice inside her head: “Warn your cycle, primitive: the reapers are coming.”