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ivesambrose · 9 months

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𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 🥂

1. 2. 3.

Do I dare ask how 2023 has been for y'all?

Pick the image you feel the most pull towards or have been seeing around you a lot, if you feel drawn towards multiple, so be it. 🤍

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at [email protected]

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𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 1

Your central theme is rising from the ashes. You're in the process of the most intense metamorphosis yet. A new dawn, a new day, a new life.

You'll feel empowered, passionate and obsessive about your pursuits. You'll allow the old skin to be ripped off of you and you'll no longer be scared to be you.

This year brings you connections, admires, collaborations, unions both in personal and proffesional life.

There's a certain duality in you that you haven't explored yet, but you will in the coming months.

You'll have good health for the most part compared to the previous year. Your family will be taken care of. The hope and assurance you may have lacked from them will come through. It will feel warm and refreshing. (Goes for chosen family too)

Romantically, you may be focused on your career or just living your life a lot. But someone might want to build a legacy or long term relationship with you.

If you're already coupled, the focus goes to building what you have and looking after domestic affairs and see things bloom.

Proffesionally, you will have your most successful and blessed year. Money shouldn't be a problem and even if it seems like it, your needs will always be met and you'll still have more.

Some of you might enjoy ghe fruits of your labour extensively. This goes for the ones who work solo or run their own business etc

Academically, you might feel a bit disinterested. Might move out from your home or change subjects. Take up something completely new. Might face your fears and push through but make it a point to follow your inner calling for the most part.

Themes centered around relationships and partnerships are significant this year as well opportunities coming out of the blue that call you to heed your intuition and step out of your comfort zone or limiting mindsets, that will inevitably lead to travel, progress and new experiences.

Make the best of this year, it'll feel like you're finally on the journey you've been preparing yourself for all this time.

𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 2

Your central theme is using your emotions as your guiding force, using it as fuel and not seeing it as weakness. Quieting your mind so you can listen to your instincts more. Healing from things you don't speak of, that you've felt have persistently held you back from your potential and finally taking the lead. You'll feel like the main character in your life finally, instead of seeing everything through the lens of a side character no one remembers.

You'll feel motivated to follow what makes your heart happy. You may be faced with choices a lot this year, a lot of this or that in several aspects of your life. Trust yourself to make the right decisions.

You'll be learning about your mind and body this year, so incase you go through ups and downs in your health you'll be able to manage it but also guide others too.

Romantically, you might as well get your happy ending. I see that you're mostly focused on the complete picture. Not bothered with what is going on in between too much. So you'll get what you're manifesting eitherway.

Proffesionally, a rebirth or evolution will take place. Something new that will grow overtime. You'll be driven about it. So success will be imminent.

Success in academics as well, feeling proud of your achievements.

Themes around revolution, personal development, healing generational trauma, humanitarism, technology as well being open to the unknown will also be prevalent this year.

Learn to make amends and embrace the breakthroughs this year has to offer you.

𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 3

Your central theme is related to wealth, inheritance, change of lifestyle, receiving help, building a legacy and feeling more secure. Some of you will see a success or change they did not see coming, it was hidden for the longest time.

Some of you may even be leaving poverty behind for a more financially secure life.

You'll find yourself blooming, physically especially. A glow up in your looks and quality of being is going to be imminent. Focus on health, beauty, food, routine etc as well. A lot of you will be experiencing vivid dreams, strange synchronicities etc too will be learning about esoteric subjects, occult or the subconscious mind a lot. You'll also be receiving success and recognition or you might be building your steps towards it that will eventually pay off in the long run.

You'll feel like this old self or image of you has died. You may even mourn it for some time but will feel more powerful, confident and self assured once you're past that.

Romantically, you'll be feeling desirable and might attract a lot of suitors. Your self concept will improve exponentially, so will your standards. So nothing less than what you want. Your intuition will be at all time high. Fear no one and nothing. Some of you might also be moving to a new house too or might end up owning something in your name.

Proffesionally, although you might deal with competition you won't be too worried. You know your skills, you'll have your resources, your work will speak for it self and you will stand out.

Friendship, community, discoveries and gains are also some of the themes surrounding you this year.

Let your imagination create for you. You'll soon realize there's so much power in allowing yourself to receive what you desire by simply being instead of doing too much.

#free readings #tarot community #divination community #pick a card #pac #pick a pile #pick a picture #2024 messages #2024 pick a card #psychic readings

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celepom · 1 year

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It’s Pride 2023! Time to put up some more comic recs!

This time I’ve put together some stories about discovering one’s own queer identity, outlining a family history of queerness, and several stories where being queer isn’t the focus - queer characters are simply allowed to be.

Belle of the Ball By Mari Costa

High-school senior and notorious wallflower Hawkins finally works up the courage to remove her mascot mask and ask out her longtime crush: Regina Moreno, head cheerleader, academic overachiever, and all-around popular girl. There’s only one teensy little problem: Regina is already dating Chloe Kitagawa, athletic all-star…and middling English student. Regina sees a perfectly self-serving opportunity here, and asks the smitten Hawkins to tutor Chloe free of charge, knowing Hawkins will do anything to get closer to her. And while Regina’s plan works at first, she doesn’t realize that Hawkins and Chloe knew each other as kids, when Hawkins went by Belle and wore princess dresses to school every single day. Before long, romance does start to blossom…but not between who you might expect. With Belle of the Ball, cartoonist Mariana Costa has reinvigorated satisfying, reliable tropes into your new favorite teen romantic comedy.

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The Moth Keeper By Kay O’Neill

Anya is finally a Moth Keeper, the protector of the lunar moths that allow the Night-Lily flower to bloom once a year. Her village needs the flower to continue thriving and Anya is excited to prove her worth and show her thanks to her friends with her actions, but what happens when being a Moth Keeper isn't exactly what Anya thought it would be? The nights are cold in the desert and the lunar moths live far from the village. Anya finds herself isolated and lonely. Despite Anya's dedication, she wonders what it would be like to live in the sun. Her thoughts turn into an obsession, and when Anya takes a chance to stay up during the day to feel the sun's warmth, her village and the lunar moths are left to deal with the consequences.

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Hollow By Shannon Watters, Branden Boyer-White & Berenice Nelle

Isabel "Izzy" Crane and her family have just relocated to Sleepy Hollow, the town made famous by—and obsessed with—Washington Irving's legend of the Headless Horseman. But city slicker-skeptic Izzy has no time for superstition as she navigates life at a new address, a new school, and, with any luck, with new friends. Ghost stories aren't real, after all.... Then Izzy is pulled into the orbit of the town's teen royalty, Vicky Van Tassel (yes, that Van Tassel) and loveable varsity-level prankster Croc Byun. Vicky's weariness with her family connection to the legend turns to terror when the trio begins to be haunted by the Horseman himself, uncovering a curse set on destroying the Van Tassel line. Now, they have only until Halloween night to break it—meaning it's a totally inconvenient time for Izzy to develop a massive crush on the enigmatic Vicky. Can Izzy's practical nature help her face the unknown—or only trip her up? As the calendar runs down to the 31st, Izzy will have to use all of her wits and work with her new friends to save Vicky and uncover the mystery of the legendary Horseman of Sleepy Hollow—before it's too late.

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Until I Meet my Husband By Ryousuke Nanasaki & Yoshi Tsukizuki

The memoir of gay activist Ryousuke Nanasaki and the first religiously recognized same-sex marriage in Japan. From school crushes to awkward dating sites to finding a community, this collection of stories recounts the author’s “firsts” as a young gay man searching for love. Dating is never ever easy, but that goes doubly so for Ryousuke, whose journey is full of unrequited loves and many speed bumps. But perseverance and time heals all wounds, even those of the heart.

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Is Love the Answer? By Uta Isaki

When it comes to love, high schooler Chika wonders if she might be an alien. She’s never fallen for or even had a crush on anyone, and she has no desire for physical intimacy. Her friends tell her that she just "hasn't met the one yet," but Chika has doubts... It's only when Chika enters college and meets peers like herself that she realizes there’s a word for what she feels inside--asexual--and she’s not the only one. After years of wondering if love was the answer, Chika realizes that the answer she long sought may not exist at all--and that that's perfectly normal.

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M Is for Monster By Talia Dutton

When Doctor Frances Ai's younger sister Maura died in a tragic accident six months ago, Frances swore she would bring her back to life. However, the creature that rises from the slab is clearly not Maura. This girl, who chooses the name "M," doesn't remember anything about Maura's life and just wants to be her own person. However, Frances expects M to pursue the same path that Maura had been on—applying to college to become a scientist—and continue the plans she and Maura shared. Hoping to trigger Maura's memories, Frances surrounds M with the trappings of Maura's past, but M wants nothing to do with Frances' attempts to change her into something she's not. In order to face the future, both Frances and M need to learn to listen and let go of Maura once and for all. Talia Dutton's debut graphic novel, M Is for Monster, takes a hard look at what it means to live up to other people's expectations—as well as our own.

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Golden Sparkle By Minta Suzumaru

Himaru Uehara’s first year of high school is off to a good start, minus one problem—he keeps having wet dreams. With only his mom and sister at home—and having skipped health class in middle school—he thinks it means there’s something wrong with him. Thankfully, a new friend has just the remedy and teaches Himaru exactly how to deal with those pesky dreams! But his solution only leads to more confusion, and the two find themselves navigating feelings they’ve never felt before.

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Thieves By Lucie Bryon

Ella can’t seem to remember a single thing from the party the night before at a mysterious stranger’s mansion, and she sure as heck doesn’t know why she’s woken up in her bed surrounded by a magpie’s nest of objects that aren’t her own. And she can’t stop thinking about her huge crush on Madeleine, who she definitely can’t tell about her sudden penchant for kleptomania… But does Maddy have secrets of her own? Can they piece together that night between them and fix the mess of their chaotic personal lives in time to form a normal, teenage relationship? That would be nice.

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Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic By Alison Bechdel

Meet Alison's father, a historic preservation expert and obsessive restorer of the family's Victorian home, a third-generation funeral home director, a high school English teacher, an icily distant parent, and a closeted homosexual who, as it turns out, is involved with his male students and a family babysitter. Through narrative that is alternately heartbreaking and fiercely funny, we are drawn into a daughter's complex yearning for her father. And yet, apart from assigned stints dusting caskets at the family-owned "fun home," as Alison and her brothers call it, the relationship achieves its most intimate expression through the shared code of books. When Alison comes out as homosexual herself in late adolescense, the denouement is swift, graphic -- and redemptive.

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She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat By Sakaomi Yuzaki

Cooking is how Nomoto de-stresses, but one day, she finds herself making way more than she can eat by herself. And so, she invites her neighbor Kasuga, who also lives alone. What will come out of this impromptu dinner invitation...?

Kasuga and Nomoto promised to spend their Christmas and New Year’s together. Now, they find themselves learning more about each other’s families through the food sent by Nomoto’s mother. Cute character bento, salmon and rice, stollen, fruit sandwiches, roast beef…Nomoto and Kasuga warm up to each other over a cheerful holiday season.

#Pride 2023 #book rec #comic #graphic novel #autobio #fantasy #science fiction #high school #queer #lesbian #gay #asexual #intersex #bisexual #romance #book recs #pride #LGBTQIA #LGBT comic

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noctxj · 2 months

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the reaper | part i

as far back as human memory can recall, the origin of flower marks remains unknown. if perhaps they came during or after the birth of humanity, or are benevolent gifts from the gods to aid ones navigation in life— milestones to remember and learn from, a north point on a compass lest you stray from your path. regardless, they have always been. and while flower marks remain an important aspect of ones journey, there is none other more significant than the soul flower mark. wherein the moment someone is born, this mark blooms above ones heart, as it is considered a pure reflection of who that person is and will be

˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.

so it was no wonder that during a gloomy winter evening, stricken screams of hysteria and the shrill wailings of a newborn baby echoed off the walls of the cold estate in a coalescing manner. the head midwife having no choice but to hurriedly pass the tiny squirming bundle to a reluctant nurse and focus on trying to placate the madam’s delirium—

"that is no child of mine! keep that accursed child away from me! nurse--!"

flower marks are a language all on its own, one that humans do not need to learn. rather, it is an inbuilt knowledge and understanding. and in the case for this newborn child, their soul flower mark had already predetermined their fate as forsaken.

as amidst the turbulent mess of bloodied towels and blankets, death had just been born.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

initially mesmerising in its opulent visage, its only when the mind catches up and registers its meaning that its beauty is quickly replaced with fear and alarm.

a blooming grandiflora rose of black petals mixed with subtle hues of reds and haunting purples rests above the girls heart, with bramble-like stems arching up across her frail collarbones to ensure it is there to stay.

a black rose, promising the bearer as the omen of death.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

even at such a young age, the cruelty of fate had already determined that little flora would not be given mercy or reprieve from the reality that is her cursed existence. a forsaken trail of purple anemones had lightly entangled itself amongst the thorny stems of her soul flower, almost as if to placate its loneliness.

a swath of lilies of the valley sprawl from her left shoulder over and down her shoulder blade, the burning trail of pain and suffering almost numb to her senses.

and then upon the delicate skin of her left wrist lay a singular bloom— a moonflower, reflecting little flora’s most earnest thoughts, dreaming of love from her own mother.

all these marks permanently etching themselves into little flora’s skin before her third birthday.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

despite living under the same roof as her mother, rarely did little flora see her; instead following in her late grandfathers footsteps as a ruthless businesswoman, silver spoon in her mouth and all. instead she herself was always surrounded by staff always heeding to her mother’s orders, to "always have that child within your sights", with an ever rotating door of tutors and nannies.

“madam, miss flora is an intellectually gifted child, it is quite remarkable! she has just—",

"… so?" her mother had sharply interrupted, “a high level of intelligence is a common trait within this family. i expect you to provide the girl with more difficult material to not only accomplish but also excel in; anything less than perfect and dare i say failure to meet my— this family's standards, will not be tolerated. or are you stating that you are not competent enough to fulfil your tutor roles' duties and responsibilities?"

"i— no— my apologies madam, of course there is no problem. if you would allow me, i have colleagues who would be thrilled to assist in miss flora’s academic—"

"do as you please. now, i have an important meeting with a gentlemen flying in from st. petersburg. a mr. z it appears… the estate staff will assist with your queries about the girl. so do refrain from contacting me any further-"

so as determined as a young child her age could be, she promised she'd keep being good to strive for her mothers praise, be an obedient and perfect daughter that her mother would realise is worthy to be loved— despite her soul flower.

“a curse that should never be shown to anyone lest she receive punishment,” her mother would often remind her.

a punishment that envelopes the expanse of her back as raised scars. milestones just as permanent as her flower marks. more lilies of the valley creeping down her back.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

little flora never knew who her father was, had asked her mother once and received a harsh slap across her cheek, her small body whipping to the carpeted floor from the force.

the silent burning of nightshade on her right pointer finger ironically mocking the hush motion.

she never cared to ask again.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

little flora remembers the day she believed her mother had finally saw value in loving her. barely eight years old and still holding onto that naive hope— and she foolishly believed she finally did.

waking up early in the morning as per her routine, only to see her mother sitting in the chair beside her bed, happiness written across her usually severe expression, looking at little flora herself. blinking once— twice— then rubbing her hands across her eyes to make sure what she is seeing is real and not a dream.

“good morning flora,” what is going on— “you and i have an agenda for today, so please come downstairs for breakfast once you’re ready.”

is today the day? did she finally do it? is her mother finally learning to love her—

“as it is a special occasion, i’ve taken the liberty of selecting your attire. now, off you go to wash up.”

little flora had been ecstatic, her heart thrumming like a hummingbird out of excitement to prove that her mother would not regret placing value on her.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

little flora’s only ever seen her mother’s soul flower once, only by chance of course. her evening robe slightly loose across her shoulders, her motions lax from the glass of wine she was nursing— a far cry from her usually sharp and elegant appearance.

a beautifully victorious gladiolus cradled upon her chest. she envied it, a blessing to be born with. unlike herself. however, it wasn’t until later that she understood why her mother despised her existence so much.

as victory and death are eternal enemies— always on opposing sides.

⋆.✧̣̇˚.

“it is the perfect place for you to grow in flora, a place for you to finally thrive in,” her mother’s words had echoed in flora’s ears.

she doesn’t know how long ago that was.

she didn’t even feel alive.

flora’s small body strapped down to a cold metal table, no longer wearing the attire her mother had especially picked out for her. instead wearing a customised medical gown, allowing an unobstructed view of her accursed soul flower mark to the blurry shapes her dull gaze had tried to focus on.

the harsh clinical smell of the room burning her nose, and the glaring overhead lights further disorienting her senses. flora couldn’t move her head if she tried, a strap also tightly bound across her forehead attached to the metal table.

what is this place? why would mother send me here? this is wrong, they must of got it wrong, i shouldn’t be here, i—

flora could feel the burning of a new mark directly below her soul flower. almost the same in size she guesses, if only she could move her head.

the agonising pain of a broken heart flourishing as a vibrant yellow rose.

˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚. ˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.✦ . ˳

tric’s notes

this highkey spawned from my hanahaki disease fic. flower meanings/symbolism was a bit difficult to grasp (ie. countries, cultures, time periods), so don't take this too seriously lol.

i was hoping to make this a oneshot but it just kept going ugh. this is unedited. part ii may be more backstory, part iii the boys will appear (no promises though, just a rough idea).

i recommend listening to “my flower” by ladies code. it’s a korean song but i think it matches the mood of this piece - so i encourage listening to it.

thanks for stopping by!! ♡︎

crossposted on ao3 (same username)

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rinixo · 2 years

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wisdom tells me to turn away

Din Djarin/Reader | 4.8k | Rated E | afab reader, no y/n, angst, angst and emotional comfort, sexual content, piv sex, ‘outercourse’, alluded to breeding kink, vague age difference

Being a non-Mandalorian makes navigating your relationship with Din difficult. Being the only non-Mandalorian on Mandalore makes navigating your relationship with Din even more difficult. Non-linear oneshots featuring you, a university scholar from Naboo who is helping The Mandalorian seek out the Jedi. read on ao3

Despite being in ruins, Mandalore was still beautiful. Nature curled around the rubble everywhere you looked, moss and roots slowly reclaiming the ruined city. You strolled through what used to be busy streets, trying to pass as much time as you could before you had no choice but to return to the Mandalorian headquarters.

You had been on the planet for three days, and you had spent most of your time wandering around. From the moment you had landed you had felt uncomfortable. You were watched constantly by the helmeted forces, and the feeling of being distrusted permeated every brief interaction you had with every person you had met. Part of you understood why – Mandalore had been destroyed by outsiders, but it was still not easy to navigate.

Din had wanted to return here. His loyalty to his people was still a core tenant of who he was, and now that the child had chosen to stay with him, he was able to focus on helping his people rebuild. The weapon he had won from Moff Gideon had also thrust him into a position of authority that most of the other Mando’s deferred to. Having him and the Darksaber here helped bolster the recovery efforts, and every day new Mandalorian refugees arrived on planet from every corner of the galaxy.

You had agreed to join him on this journey, partly out of affection for him and partly out of curiosity. Your academic interest had quickly faded once you were on the planet, as what little historical information that remained was heavily guarded and off-limits to non-Mandalorians. Din had advocated on your behalf, and you had been allowed access to some records, but it was mostly agricultural-based, like crop yields and trading figures. You had quickly grown bored of it. Now the main reason you stayed was because Din was here and, well – it’s not like you had your own ship to leave on.

Pausing in your walk, you looked up to the sky and sighed. Dusk was approaching, and you knew you should head back before it got too dark out, but the thought of spending another long, lonely night wasn’t particularly exciting. Din’s days had been spent with the leaders of the Mandalorian forces, planning and building and talking about who knows what. Your room was small and not near Din’s, and while it hadn’t been explicitly said, spending the nights with him did not seem like an option. Just like your presence on the planet, your attachment to the man wasn’t particularly welcome.

Your partnership had bloomed into a sort of relationship, one you weren’t sure how to classify. In the moments you two were entangled in the dark, you felt like more than just lovers. There was a reverence in how Din made love to you, making you feel like the center of his universe. However, in the light of the day, to the eyes of outsiders, the two of you were little more than traveling companions – partly for safety, and partly because neither of you knew how to make it go further.

Now here, on Mandalore, that distance felt like it was widening by the second. You had seen only glimpses of the man over the past couple of days – he was up before the sun rose and was still out by the time you found yourself wandering back to your own sleeping space. Grogu was also spending most of his time with Din, leaving you to fend for yourself.

The rational part of you knew he wasn’t ignoring you on purpose. You had been in his life for such a short time, and you knew that if you were in his position you would also want to spend time with the people who shared your culture.

However, you also found yourself simmering with a mixture of emotions you were afraid to give names to. Earlier you had seen Din standing around a table with a group of other armored and armed Mandalorians. The lilt in your heart at seeing him was quickly overtaken by a pang of jealousy at the way a female Mandalorian gestured at something on the table to Din, leaning in close enough that her arm brushed his.

Part of you wanted desperately to make your way to his side, stake a personal claim and be claimed by him in return. You had gotten used to being the center of his attention while traveling together, and while you told yourself he still cared for you, you wanted him to show it.

You didn’t know the ins and outs of Mandalorian culture, and what information existed that was accessible to you was not very enlightening. Based on your interactions with Din, you surmised that family and clan were very important. His devotion to Grogu was evidence enough of that, as well as the way the three of you often found yourselves helping others no matter where you went. Yet there were still questions that lingered about your specific relationship with Din.

You still had never seen his face. When you slept together, it was always in the dark, and most of the time he remained more clothed than you. He was not shy when it came to touching you when the two of you were alone in the dark, but there was a kind of unspoken agreement that personal affection ended once the lights were on. You didn’t know if this would eventually change, or even if it could. There was an undercurrent of forbidden-ness that permeated your relationship, stemming from his isolationist cultural values and your careful tiptoeing around not making him feel like he needed to betray what he stood for in order to satisfy you.

You wondered if there were texts you could access in the limited library here at the compound that would give you answers to your questions. I should just ask him, you had told yourself more than once, but it never happened. Having that conversation would answer your questions, but you weren’t sure if you wanted to hear those answers. Perhaps finding that information in texts would be easier for you to bear, or at least prepare you for a true conversation about whatever future Din saw between the two of you.

Making your way back towards the makeshift repository, you felt the eyes of the armed guards follow you the entire way. You weren’t entirely sure what they thought you might get up to – it wasn’t like you had any weapons – but they treated you like a threat. If it wasn’t so intimidating, it would make you laugh.

The repository – a side room filled with locked cabinets and server towers – was gloriously empty when you arrived. There were usually one or two miscellaneous Mando’s in here, carefully sorting through information or stacking whatever was recovered for future sorting by someone else. The day was slowly ending, and you knew most of the forces here would be settling in for a meal. You being here meant you’d have to settle for whatever was left over tonight, but you were willing to pay that price for the chance of a few uninterrupted minutes of data hunting.

You started with the servers, knowing you it would take less time to search a digital collection that through physical ones and the longer you stayed, the higher the chance of someone coming in and yelling at you. Connecting your data pad, you ran a search for all ‘culture’ related queries you could think of. Surprisingly, you got several hits that seemed to be relevant. Feeling nervous, you quickly downloaded copies to your personal device and disconnected, taking extra care to wipe what evidence you could of your access to the server. Years of hacking into secure systems searching for data your institution deemed out of your pay grade had given you more than enough skills to erase your trail from most casual observers.

Pleased with your finds, you hurried back to your rooms for a quick shower and some intense studying time.

After showering quickly, you returned to your room. It was little more than a side closet, big enough for a low cot and a small chest of your belongings. You settled in, a warm cup of caf at your side, and began looking over the information you found.

The more you read, the more questions you had. A lot of the information was secondhand, histories and tales taken from oral sources and documented digitally for preservation. It wasn’t the goldmine of direct answers you were looking for, but you did find a few key points, some of which both confused and concerned you. The little information you found mentioned something called the ‘Six Actions’, as well as basic expectations about family and relationships. It wasn’t anything groundbreaking in any particular direction, but you were left with more curiosity about where you stood in Din’s life. It was looking like you’d have to be brave and ask him yourself.

Not willing to spend another night with your anxious thoughts, you decided to go to him as soon as you could. You waited a few hours, until all but those on watch duty would be asleep. Wrapping your linen shawl over your head and shoulders, you slipped quietly out of your room, hurrying as quietly as you could towards Din’s room. Thankfully you did not see anyone in the ten or so minutes it took you to make your way across the small compound. You found the door you were looking for, and lightly knocked.

Half a second pause, and then the door slid up, revealing Din. He was still armored head to toe. He said your name softly, almost as if a question. Wringing your hands, you suddenly felt shy.

“Can I come in?” You asked, voice barely above a whisper. Din immediately stepped to the side to let you in. You pulled your shawl down over your head, and shook out your hair. You looked around the room, immediately noticing it was both larger and more kitted out than the closet you had been shoved into.

“Are you alright?” Din asked, breaking the silence. You nodded, wrapping your arms around yourself.

“Yeah,” you replied. You wanted to talk, to spill every thought that had been in your mind for the past few days, but the words died in your throat as emotion built. Something about being here in the same room as him made you feel more upset than not being around him. Seeing him, being in the same room as him made facing the reality of getting answers to the questions you had about your relationship seem harder every moment.

Din stepped towards a small table in the middle of the room, and pulled out a chair. You managed to step the short distance towards him, and took the seat he offered. He backed up towards a small ledge, leaning against it and crossing his arms in a familiar shielding gesture. Out of the corner of your eye, you spied Grogu’s cradle, the lid shut. You were glad he wasn’t awake for this conversation, as you suspected it would have made it that much harder.

“How have you been?” You asked quietly, taking your turn to break the silence. Din shrugged casually with one shoulder.

“Busy,” he replied. “There’s so much going on. I knew it would be a lot, but every day there’s something new.”

“Oh,” was all you could think to say. You didn’t want to ask him specifics on what he was doing. You didn’t want to hear about all the time he was spending away from you, from whatever was so engrossing he hadn’t even thought to check in on you for days. All you had done over the past few days was think about him. You bounced your leg, partly out of nervousness, partly for something to channel your energy in to so that you wouldn’t burst into angry tears.

Clearing his throat, Din adjusted his stance slightly. He was obviously uncomfortable with your silence. “Ah…and you?” He finally asked. “How have you been?”

You let out a choked laugh. “Oh, fine,” you answered, trying and failing to keep the bitter tone out of your voice. “I spend the first half of the day wandering around the rubble while armed guards stare at me through blaster sights, and the second half I spend staring up at the ceiling of the closet I sleep in.”

A modulated sigh. “I-I’m sorry,” he placated. “I told them you were with me, that you didn’t need to be watched, but they’re…” he trailed off. You nodded, eyes trained on his boots and bit your lip as you chewed on a million different responses.

“I know,” you finally replied. “I get it. I’m an outsider. I’m not a warrior or a bounty hunter. There’s not a lot I can do to be useful to you all.”

“That’s not true,” Din countered. “You’ve been a big help to me, and to Grogu.” That got a slight smile from you, and you looked up at him.

“Thanks…but that’s not why I’m here.”

“Do you need a reason to be?” Din asked, and your heart twinged.

You wondered how best to approach this topic. Being here made you want to pretend all of your worries were gone and fall in to his arms, but you knew that once the night was over you’d go back to being alone again, with all of the same questions still stuck in your throat.

“Where do we go from here?” You looked up at him. The ‘we’ was whatever your entanglement was, beyond being traveling companions and occasional bedfellows. Would you land in the same place, your roots entwined with one another’s? Or was this the beginning of a slow end, with you parting ways towards separate futures?

“What do you mean?” Din answered.

“Us,” you expanded. “Do you…how do you feel about us? Where does this lead?”

A quick note of silence. “I’m not sure what you’re asking. Where is this coming from?” Din shifted in posture, arms still crossed in front of him.

“I was reading,” you went on, “About Mandalorian culture. I know how I feel, but I wanted to understand how you feel. About us.

“I care for you,” Din said softly yet firmly, but that wasn’t what you wanted, and the hurt in your expression told him so.

“You can’t say it-“

“Why does it need naming?” Din challenged after a moment. “Isn’t it enough, just to have it?”

“No, it’s not!” You raised your voice for the first time, anger and hurt flashing from your eyes. “You can’t – you can’t just kiss me, and fuck me, and whisper sweet things to me in the dark and –“

“That’s-“

“Is it so shameful?” You interrupted, vision blurry from emotion. “That I can’t even spend the night on the same side of the building as you?”

Din sighed, hands going to his hips in flustered frustration. “No, it’s-“

“I’m not a Mandalorian,” you finished for him.

A pause. “No,” Din agreed slowly. “You’re not.”

He pulled out the companion to the chair you were in, and sat in front of you. Even in the low light, the brilliance of his armor was enough for you to see your own trembling form reflected back at you.

“And I’m…not sure I want to be one,” you added hoarsely.

I don’t know if I can live this life.

The silence was painful. You wished for the millionth time that the stupid helmet wasn’t on his face so that you could get a glimpse of his reactions. There you were, laying your heart out bare in front of him, tears welling up in the corners of your eyes, and he sat like a statue.

“I have been selfish,” Din finally answered. “The creed does not approve of relationships between a Mandalorian and one who is not, or one who is not planning to be part of the culture.”

You let out a pained laugh as you wiped your tears with the back of your hand. “You are ashamed of us.”

“No, no,” Din corrected. He leaned forward and reached for one of your hands. You allowed him to grasp it, the warmth of his skin coming through the worn leather gloves. His thumb brushed over your chilled skin, and you sniffled as you watched the motion, unable to stare at your reflection in his helmet.

“I care for you. Deeply. You make me want things I’d never thought I’d have.” His grip on your hand tightened slightly. “I’ve been selfish, I-I knew that this wasn’t fair to you. That I couldn’t ask you make that kind of choice.”

“But you did,” you choked out. “Isn’t that what this is?”

Din squeezed your hand. “The creed is important to me,” he continued. “I can’t just let it go.”

You closed your eyes tightly, feeling tears squeeze through and trail down your cheeks. “So you’re letting me go.”

“No, mesh’la. I can’t.” A short exhale of a modulated laugh. “Stars, I can’t. I told myself that every time would be the last time, but I just can’t let you go.” Din’s hands went up to cradle the side of your face, and he gently thumbed away your tears.

“I won’t make you stay,” he continued. “If you want to leave. You are young, and your life is more open than mine ever was.” You looked up at him, vision blurred by emotion.

“But I want to make this work,” Din confessed. “I want to make us work.” Your lower lip trembled, and he brushed a thumb over it softly.

“Wh-what would that look like?” You asked, voice wavering slightly.

“I don’t know,” he admitted. “There’s more to being a Mandalorian than I could have known. Learning – and unlearning – will not be easy. And I can’t promise that it will be quick. But if it’s the difference between having you, and not…” Din trailed off.

“Do you want to leave?” He asked quietly.

“No,” you relented at last. “I don’t.”

Din let out the breath he was holding, and leaned back in his chair.

“I’m glad.”

“I can’t really fight, or repair buildings,” you went on. “I don’t know if being a Mandalorian is what I want…but I don’t think I can stand one more night of sleeping by myself in that closet.”

Another short bark of a laugh. “No, sweet girl. I’ve missed you in my bed these past few nights.”

You ducked your head shyly again, a smile across your lips. “Oh?”

His response was to stand, and reach for your hand. You let him pull you to your feet, and shuffle you towards his sleeping area. He had a real bed. A big one.

A few button pushes on his wrist, and the lights in the room dimmed. You allowed him to help you undress to your base layers, and fell against the bed as he turned off the lights and began to take his armor off.

You curled up on your side, one hand under your cheek, and the other on the pillow. You heard him finish disrobing and pad his way to the other side of the bed to crawl in next to you. One of his hands, warm and calloused, reached over to cup your cheek gently.

“I did miss you,” he confessed. “Over these past few days. Grogu did too.”

You felt his fingers trace the smile on your lips. “Did you miss me, or did you miss me distracting him while you worked?” Your own hands went to the side of his neck as you scooted closer to him. Your played with the soft curls at the base of his neck, the stubble on his face scratching your wrist.

“That too,” he concedes, and you chuckled. You can feel his pulse in his throat, a steady beat as his arms move to pull you in closer. Sometimes, when he holds you, it feels like he won’t be satisfied until you’re pulled completely inside of him.

“You’re a father now,” you tease, and his hand grips your side a little harder. “You’ll need to learn to discipline him better.”

“And what do you know about discipline?” He breathes against your mouth. Angling your face to press a kiss to the side of his lips, you nuzzle your nose against his, just barely out of reach.

Your mouth meeting his is your answer. The scruff of his facial hair is a welcome feeling against your cheek and your chin, and you place once hand on his chest while the other scratches at the base of his neck. One of your legs is hoisted up over his hip, and his hands go to your ass to pull you against him. You let out a muffled gasp at the feeling of his erection against your clothed cunt.

The two of you rock back and forth, devouring each other in an attempt to fill the longing within. Breaking away from his mouth for half a second, you roll yourself onto his lap, thighs spread over his lower abdomen, hands splayed on his broad chest.

“Down,” you command breathlessly as you feel Din tense under you. You tug on the loose linen shirt he wears, and he obliges and helps you pull it off over his head. You trace his pulse from his neck down to his chest, nails scratching him lightly. That pulls a small groan from him, and you shuffle your hips so that your core bumps against where his cock strains against his linen pants.

“Girl,” he warns you lowly, but you ignore him as you reach behind you to free him from his clothing before slipping off your own shorts. His cock thuds heavy against his abdomen, and you place the seat of your pussy over his pulsing length,

You slowly slide up and down the length of him, enjoying the way the thick head of his cock parts your lips and bumps against your sensitive clit.

“Fucking hell,” Din spits, and you feel him throw his head back against the pillow. His hands come up to grab your waist, but you refuse his attempt to direct your movements and remove them. Your pace remains steady as you continue to slide him through your slick center, enjoying the tortured groans your work elicits from the man.

You circle your hips so that the head of his cock – twitching and leaking – bumps rhythmically against your clit. Your hands steady yourself on his chest, mouth opening in a breathy whimper. There’s a knot of frisson building, centered where your bodies meet.

“Gonna cum on my cock?” Din groans, voice thick with desperation. You scratch your nails on his chest, hyper focused on the way he throbs against you. “Fucking hell, I can feel you dripping on me, you wicked girl-“

“Mmm!” You can’t speak, afraid to break the high prematurely. You grind yourself down on him, leaning forward to rest your forehead on his collarbone.

“Yes, good girl, use me,” he growls again. “Be a good girl, cum on my cock, and I’ll fill you up-“

You fall over the edge, mouth opening into a silent ‘oh’ pressed against his thrumming heartbeat. Your lower body shakes with your release, hips stuttering to break their rhythmic pattern.

Din doesn’t let you come down from it before he’s taking himself in his fist and aligning himself up to the entrance of your cunt. Your voice returns in a wail as he shifts his hips up at the same time he pulls your waist down so that he’s filling you up completely.

“This is why I can’t let you go,” he groans, tilting his hips up so that the head of him kisses your cervix. “You’re too fucking perfect, you take my cock like you’re made for it-“

A cry of pleasure is caught in your throat and turns into half a sob as he maneuvers your waist. His legs come up for leverage so he can piston up into you. Despite the possessive way he words it, you can hear the awe in the timbre of his voice, feel the desperation in how he fucks you. The first couple of times the two of you slept together you could tell he was holding back. He only took you from behind, and you had to gently coax him to touch you in places other than your hips. You weren’t sure if it was due to shyness or inexperience, or just the result of being a man who didn’t allow himself any kind of pleasure beyond that which what would serve his clan.

Here though, in the dark, he let go. Fucking from behind turned into him tangling himself into you, holding your shoulder so you didn’t hit your head against the metal wall of his cot as he pounded your poor cunt relentlessly. Restrained moans turned into him whispering filthy, adoring praise into your ears. Turned in to him almost giving name to the desires you pulled out of the depths of his being.

“You make me want things I shouldn’t,” he grunts, taking the chance to flip your bodies so that he was above you. You arch your back with a moan, and Din mouths wetly up from your breasts to your exposed neck, not once stopping the slap of his pelvis against you.

You grasp lamely at his shoulders as he hoists one of your legs up to his side. He grinds himself inside of you. You know what he is alluding to when he says things like that. You can tell by the way he used you. Sex itself was more than just pleasure for him. It was also the base purpose of binding the two of you together, the ache of wanting to flood your womb, and to bask in the consequences. You wonder if he does it consciously, or if it’s just the heat of the moment, but something about how it leaves him it makes it feel like more than just dirty talk.

“You’re perfect,” he puffs against your mouth. You’re on the edge of another orgasm, relishing in the way he fills you. You’re more reluctant to voice what he asks of your body, and instead urge him on by the way you angle your hips so he can hit as deep as possible, all but begging him to fill you up. You don’t know what it would mean, if it took. For the two of you, or the creed, but the way it drove his passion made you want to find out.

Din groans, and you feel him twitch up inside of you. “Cum on my cock,” he demands. One of his thumbs comes down to press against your clit, and you shriek, still sensitive from your first orgasm. You hear him curse as your core pulses around him, and he holds your hips still as his own orgasm approaches and he ruts deeper.

“That’s it,“ he pants, and pulls you closer, cock creating a seal against your cervix. “Fucking stars. Take my seed, sweet girl, good girl-“

You choke out his name as he buries his face into the side of your neck, holding your hips to his own as he pulses his release inside of you. Your legs shake from exertion, trembling in his grasp as he holds himself inside you, cock still pulsing thick streams of white. You close your eyes, lost in a fog of ectasy.

The two of you stay like that for a while, the tight seal of your pussy reluctant to let go of him. When he finally raises himself off of you, you whimper at the loss of his warmth. He leaves the bed with a groan, and padded somewhere off in the dark. You pant, trying to calm your breathing and settle down.

Din returns, and sits next to you on the bed. He murmurs something lowly that you don’t quite catch, and you feel something warm and damp against your skin. Gently, he wipes a cloth against your thighs and your sensitive core, and then up and over your breast and collar. He follows the cloth with his mouth. He leaves lingering kisses up the center of your breastbone, to the side of your jaw, to your mouth, and to your forehead.

“I’m ok,” you let out a hoarse whisper, and feel him smile.

“Just ok?”

You snort, and smack his shoulder lightly. “You know what I meant.”

He sighs contently, laying so that your heads were sharing the same pillow. He holds your legs with one hand, thumb brushing over the skin there.

The two of you lay there in comfortable silence, on the edge of sleep. You think about the things both said and unsaid.

“Is it going to be a problem if I sleep here?” You ask quietly. Din lets out a breath.

“No,” he responded. “And even if it was, I don’t care.”

“I don’t want to make things more complicated for you.”

Din laughs, but there is only affection in it.

“Sweet girl, you already have.”

#the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin smut #the mandalorian smut #mando x reader #mandalorian smut #din djarin

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femmefatalevibe · 2 years

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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome & Perfectionism

How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome:

Keep Your Ideal Self Top of Mind: While you can't ever truly "fake it until you make it," it is essential to cultivate the belief that can act in accordance with your ideal self. Consider what the ideal version of yourself would do on a daily basis: What would your morning routine/night routine look like? How would you prioritize tasks or activities throughout your day? What would you consider your metrics for a successful project, task, social interaction, or professional activity? How would you describe a productive day, week, or month? Qualify and quantify these ideal metrics to give yourself a blueprint to move forward toward your goals and become the best version of yourself.

Competence Builds Confidence: Remember that the notion of an "overnight success story" is a fallacy. Quickly-awarded achievements, seemingly effortless skill sets, or having the perfect script for every occasion typically stem from hours or years of practice, experiences, studying, self-development, and trial and error. Over time, you refine these crafts until you can consider them as strengths. This inner knowing gives you the self-assurance needed to truly believe in yourself and it's contagious in your work, speech, and body language. Competence radiates inner confidence, without a question.

Remember Everything Is Relative: Logically, we know that comparing the middle of someone's journey to the beginning of yours doesn't make any sense. While it can be intimidating to enter the ring as a beginner, remember that the most skilled and successful people you know were at one point at square one. The only way to catch up to those you admire is to make an effort in the first place. However, because you're a beginner, give yourself some grace and remember that making mistakes is part of the learning process. It is better to fail in the beginning before people have certain expectations of you. But, the truth is, no one truly knows what they're doing. More time existing and life experience only helps us make better judgments to more accurately assess the proper next move.

Perceive Attempts As Data: Success is all about pattern recognition. See what "inputs" derive certain "outputs." Some attempts – at a certain career path, academic concentration, interpersonal interactions – will be advantageous with many that are neutral and some that go sour. Do not allow an unanswered email to a pitch, a lower grade on an assignment, or an ending of any type of relationship to feel like a moral failure and as a marker of your worth (personally, professionally, etc.). Evaluate what you did correctly and seek out areas for improvement. The more attempts you make, the more data you collect in order to help you make accurate assessments going forward. Consider this your motivation to start.

Accept Failures As Life Lessons: Failures offer a unique opportunity for self-reflection and course correction. Consider the mistakes that lead you to a negative outcome or the unfavorable circumstances you entered into (e.g. not studying for a test or already seeing red flags during the job interview). Use these opportunities to refine your strategies to succeed. While failures might not be inherently positive in the short term, failing fast saves you a lot of trouble along the way.

How To Overcome Perfectionism:

Find Stupidly Small Ways To Start: Write the title on a document and some keywords you want to use; Write an introductory sentence to an email; Place the first photo on the collage; Mix the spices together for a dish –literally anything to get you started on the task at hand. Give yourself a small push to gain momentum to keep going.

Set A Timer: Gamify any task by making it a race against the clock. Set a timer for 10, 20, or 30 minutes to see how much you can get done with a short spurt for hyper-focus. Focus on output, not outcomes when using this method. Remember: You can always go back and edit a project or refine the details of a space, meal, or task after. You will probably surprise yourself with how much you get done and how quick it is to elevate the standard of any timed work.

Consider Consequences of Delayed Action: Procrastination is perfectionism's greatest frenemy. The quicker you are to begin a task or strategize how to initiate a conversation, the more likely you will be to make it happen and give yourself the brain space to mull over the ideas before sharing the final product. Shitty first drafts of anything in life are welcomed. You can always edit later before finishing or showcasing something you want to take pride in. A step forward gives you guidance toward the right path. A step backward provides insight into how to strategize to win in the future. The only guaranteed way to never achieve greatness in a certain area of life is to not start in the first place.

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bsverryin · 1 year

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: ̗̀➛ HSR men having a hard working/study first s/o

Who?

╰┈➤ Jing yuan, Gepard, Blade

Situation?

╰┈➤ You're a hard working s/o who wants to be as successful as them.

✎ HEADCANONS ONLY!! this story is made for the gays and girlies(real) who needs motivations, I might make genshin men version because I need to read those imagines too 🤌 cannot assure you of perfect grammar but I hope everyone enjoys!! DMS are open..🫶

: ̗̀➛JING YUAN

Jing yuan makes sure that you have everything that you need for studying. He allows you to come to his office to take books and read them, while he will be admiring you as you do study, Even though you've often warned him that it's distracting, he enjoys seeing you carefully studying and trying to catch up to him in terms of success. After you study, his arms wrapped around your shoulder as he gives you kisses, telling you "good job" and making jokes about how you'll instantly be smarter than him in the future at the same time he'll give you advice on how you can study more effectively.

When your studies are finally over and you're starting to reach your goal to be as successful as him, he couldn't be much happier. He never stops telling you that you deserved everything and he knew you could do it. His compliments never cease when you are as successful as him. Though he might be somewhat distracting at times, he was there for you from the beginning till the end of your journey and always making sure that you are eating right and studying well.

: ̗̀➛ GEPARD

Gepard will study alongside you when he has time to do so, despite the fact that he is cognizant of what you've been studying. It's actually making him feel special knowing that you're studying to be as successful as him but he wanted you to be twice as successful as him because he believes your skills are awesome and he believes that you can do anything as long as you're passionate about it. Every time you see him, you'd brag about what you'd discovered, and he'd praise you despite knowing what it was all about.

When he sees that you're reaching your goals, Gepard shows his love and support to you by being affectionate and giving you the quality time that you both have been wanting, you have been too busy with your academics and his responsibilities as a captain to spend time together. Despite this, you two never face a challenge because you are aware of one another's perspective. He loves the fact that you put yourself before him because he's always wishing for a bright future for you and to the both of you.

: ̗̀➛ BLADE

Blade makes sure that no one is disturbing you while studying. He would always hesitate himself from visiting you when you are in a library in order to not disturb you. He is well aware of your desire to achieve success similar to his, and he giggles whenever he does. Of course, he does this secretly. You're always surprised on how he's always outside when you finished studying but the truth was he was really waiting for hours for you to finish. When you found out that he's been waiting for you, You assured him that it was okay and you wanted him to visit you more because he gives you inspiration. He was still hesitant, though, and he would prefer that you put your studies first.

When you're slowly achieving your dream, He visits you more often and makes sure that you're putting your health first. Studying is important but your health should be your priority. He told you to just stop when your head is starting to ache from studying and he treats you somewhere nice to refresh your mind or he just wants you to focus on him after you study. Either way, he loves treating you when he sees you trying your best and when you're struggling he makes sure that he'll teach you more than the books that you've read.

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your-astro-mami · 1 year

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Jupiter in Taurus: Your Luck for the Upcoming year (2023-2024)

Jupiter entered Taurus on May 16th and it will stay there until May 25th 2024. Jupiter in Taurus is connected to financial security, finding stability, indulgence in the things that bring true comfort.

See how this will impact you personally based on your Rising Sign:

Aries Rising

Jupiter will be in your 2nd house which will help you gain confidence and self-assurance. You may experience growth in terms of values and priorities in your life. You may feel ready to go out of your comfort zone and bring change into your life. Financially, this could be a great year for an increase in your finances, new financial opportunities or making big purchases. On the negative side, you may have selfish moments and be inconsiderate of those around you. Try to avoid overspending and be more conscious of your spending habits. Avoid overindulgence in anything.

Taurus Rising

This year will bring new opportunities in your life and allow you to put yourself out there and feel more confident in who you are. This year will be a great time to make important decisions for your future. You may have different priorities or gain a new perspective on life. You will naturally attract luck and good fortune. On the negative side, you are prone to selfish behavior and arrogance. Try to avoid having hope in your plans unless you take the action needed as well. This year will help you grow and go out of your comfort zone, be more independent and open-minded for new things.

Gemini Rising

Jupiter will be in your 12th house which will be highly beneficial for your mental health and inner wellbeing. You may overcome any major insecurities and self-doubt. This year will bring inner growth and help you feel more confident in yourself. Spending more time alone, going on solo retreats, spiritual journeys will be highly beneficial to you. You may go through a spiritual transformation and put more focus into your beliefs. You may overcome the feelings of loneliness. On the negative side, try to avoid neglecting other areas of your life as that could lead to losing control and bringing unnecessary chaos or problems.

Cancer Rising

Jupiter will be in your 11th house so you are likely to go out of your comfort zone when it comes to meeting new people and making new friends. You might be more sociable and you will feel ready to attract new people and opportunities into your life. You will experience growth in your friendships and you may feel ready to let go of the connections that no longer bring joy into your life. You will be determined to focus on your biggest dreams and ambitions. Try to avoid starting many things at once as that may not allow you to complete what you have previously started. Dreaming big will not bring the results you want unless you use strategy, patience and effort as well.

Leo Rising

Jupiter will be in your 10th house of career and professional life which will bring growth and new opportunities in your career. You may finally receive the recognition you deserve. This year could bring a newfound level of popularity - you may receive a lot of attention from others. You may learn valuable knowledge that will help you make the right decisions when pursuing your biggest goals. This year could also bring a higher sense of duty and responsibility. On the negative side, you may be overly domineering over others and your pride in your accomplishments may push you to overlook those of others.

Virgo Rising

Jupiter will be in your 9th house which will make this a fabulous year for travelling and exploring new places. Being in another country could bring a lot of knowledge and experience. You are likely to create valuable connections. This year could be great for your personal development and your academic journey. Now is the time to start any courses or pursue higher education. On the negative side, you may lack a sense of responsibility and you may outgrow many of the things you were once attached to. This year will bring freedom.

Libra Rising

Jupiter will be in your 8th house which could help you overcome any major insecurities, help you gain strength and confidence. Financially this year may bring positive changes and an increase in your finances. This may be the perfect time to invest or make big financial decisions. Positive transformation will happen, but it may require letting go of things that were meaningful to you. Your attachment to them may still be there, but growth comes with letting go. This year will bring out a new, stronger version of you.

Scorpio Rising

Jupiter will be in your 7th house which shows a high possibility for entering a meaningful relationship or making a further commitment in your current one (engagement, moving in, marriage). This year will be great for networking and creating new connections. The people in your life may teach you valuable lessons and provide you with guidance. On the negative side, your ego may sometimes be a problem in your relationships and your pride may not allow you to make compromises with others. Despite that, this is an abundant year for personal and professional relationships.

Sagittarius Rising

Jupiter will be in your 6th house of health which shows a great time for your health and overall wellbeing. This could be a great time to make improvements in your routine and start a new health journet. You may be highly energetic. This year may bring new work opportunities or a promotion. On the positive side, you will be ambitious and may attract luck. On the negative side, you may have a higher-than-thou attitude at work and your ego may prevent you from appreciating other people's efforts.

Capricorn Rising

Jupiter will be in your 5th house which will bring positive changes in your romantic life. You might meet someone new and start a purposeful connection. You might be more creative and expressive of your talents and abilities. Throughout this year your happiness will come from socializing and spending time with others. You may develop new hobbies or interests or work on a talent you may have. On the negative side, overindulgence may be a big problem for you and things could easily get out of control. You are prone to hedonistic attitudes.

Aquarius Rising

This year Jupiter will be in your 4th house which will bring joy into your family life. You are likely to experience growth in your family whether that's making a new commitment with your partner, buying a home or moving. This year will bring emotional growth and happiness. You may finally let go of old emotions burdens. On the negative side, you may grow detachment to things that were once meaningful. You may lack attachment and sense of duty to your home due to your desire for freedom.

Pisces Rising

Jupiter will be in your 3rd house which shows that you will gain wisdom and a new perspective on life. You may have a more mature outlook. This year may bring new adventures and you are ready to explore your surroundings, find new information and create new connections. On the positive side, this could be a good time to pursue and focus on any interests you have wanted to explore. On the negative side, you may not pay enough attention to your responsibilities.

Note: This post was made based on the Whole Sign system. If you use Placidus check the horoscope based on the house cusp Taurus is on in your chart.

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my-deer-friend · 5 months

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Hii I have a bit of personal question, if that is alright. I am very interested in the American Revolution but I do not live in America. I would like to become a historian or researcher of that time period one day. As a student do you think it is difficult to be a historian of the American Revolution when you are not American? I get a lot of books and information online, but I do not think it is the same as being in a place? Do you think your school program a good stepping stone to get into an American graduate school? Is that something you want to do one day?

Sorry for all the inquiries, you are just the only person on here who is in a similar situation as myself! Best wishes to you!

Hi Anon! This is a really good question, and I'll do my best to answer it as both a history student and a university professional.

(First, I'll note that my interest personally is not primarily in the American revolution, but rather in the 18th century more broadly. That includes lots of angles that I can pursue in Europe, not least looking at relations in the Atlantic world, the "republic of letters" and the enlightenment, and thematically I'm interested in queer history, which can be studied everywhere. I also have no desire to live in the US. But, yes, let's assume AmRev is the focus.)

There are different considerations for undergrad vs postgrad.

Undergraduate

At undergraduate level, it doesn't matter too much where you study. At this point in your journey, broadly speaking, the focus is on developing your academic skills, learning established content about your topic, and exploring a range of scholarly interests (not just the topic itself, but how to research that topic – i.e. methodologies). As long as your university has a department for American history, or even better a major, you're fine.

While you're busy with your degree, you can supplement your learning about the period in a lot of ways, including:

Using your own library to access books, journal articles and databases (and getting materials through inter-library loans if need be)

Using the vast and ever-growing online resources on American history provided by institutions like the Library of Congress, American universities and libraries (e.g. NYPL)

Where something isn't already available online, contacting the archive that has it and seeing if you can get a copy (I wrote a post about that)

Talk to your history prof about your interest, and they will probably be able to suggest some avenues to pursue. One very useful tool is to look up the AmRev curriculum or syllabus from other univerisities and see what readings and topics they cover (just google: "american revolution" syllabus). Here's one that came up.

And then – and I'll put this point in bold because it's the most important thing I'll say here:

👉✨Attend conferences✨👈

Conferences are where you make invaluable connections with like-minded scholars, hear about new research, find out about opportunities (scholarships, programs, funding, etc.), discover what a career in academia actually looks like, get advice from people already doing the job you want to do, and so on. There are even conferences specifically for undergrad students, or there might be a track at a generalist conference that allows emerging researchers to present on a topic. Lots of these take place online (hence, cheaper), or you might be able to apply for funding from your university to attend (or idk you have a fabulously wealthy great-aunt).

Postgraduate

While undergrad is more about learning, postgrad is more about finding out. The higher up the ladder you go, the narrower your focus becomes, and you start to need more specialised guidance. To get the most out of your learning, you need to go where the experts are, and naturally, many of the most cutting-edge scholars on American history are, well, in America. You'll want to be surrounded by a community of like-minded scholars. And yeah, "being there" can be important not just for better access to primary materials, but also for insights that come from physical, social and cultural proximity.

That said, I don't think it's impossible (or inadvisable) to study the American revolution outside of America; it's just trickier. Doing that successfully comes down to 1) finding the right advisor and 2) choosing the right topic.

By this point, you should know who the leading scholars are in your particular niche of interest. Nobody really studies "the American revolution" writ large; rather, they (and you) will focus on the political or racial or sociocultural or regional or culinary or-- whatever aspect of it. It might just happen that the people in your field are located near you.

You can also approach the topic from a different angle – start from a local point of interest that you can to relate to the AmRev. (Maybe you're Italian, and you know about Italian History Blorbo who went to fight in the war, and there's a story to tell there. Maybe you're Dutch and you have things to say about the intricacies of the financial and political support the Netherlands gave to America. And so on.) This might, in fact, lead to novel insights and perspectives that haven't been explored yet.

Good luck to you!

If anyone wants to share their own experiences, please feel free!

#amrev #american history #gradblr #feel free to send any follow-up questions #as you can see i'm very capable of rambling on about this topic

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elicathebunny · 10 months

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Preparation to make 2024 a progressive Year.

This is how you will prepare for 2024:

What not to do -

🚫 Start on a fresh week

🚫 Start on a fresh month

🚫 Start on new years

🚫 Plan goals that need good willpower before building the willpower first (like intense exercise every day)

🚫 Expecting too much at once and not easing yourself into a new lifestyle

What to do -

✔️ Start again the second you mess up and don't give up then and there

✔️ Get into a routine before the new year starts

✔️ Slowly introduce tasks that progressively get harder to build endurance and willpower

✔️ Change your surroundings to fit your new/ideal lifestyle

✔️ Allow yourself to have breaks, nobody is perfect

What to focus on -

> mental health

!shadow work

!embracing the inner child

!mirror work

!therapy (if you can afford it)

!rest (around 7-10 hours, anything below 7 isn't enough)

!reducing screentime

!affirmation tapes

!journaling

> physical health

!working out

!balanced eating (learn how to cook nutritious meals at home)

!basking in nature

!stretching

!supplements - get a blood test to find out what you are lacking (if you live in a cold country - coloured people especially, you are very vitamin D deficient so take vitamin D supplements and foods)

> environment

!decluttering and regular cleaning (throw out unused things, give stuff to charity or to people who might want it, keep productive spaces clean, use scents to freshen things up)

!hanging around with the right crowd (getting rid of people that don't/won't help you or support you on your journey)

!setting your space for up 4 success (e.g. if you want to run put your running shoes and sports clothes out as well as your water bottle to set yourself up for success)

> lifestyle

!create easy to follow routines (not too complex so you can stick to them)

!everything around you should resemble the life you are trying to create (clean space, healthy groceries, clothes - give the ones you don't use to charity, phone - remove contacts you don't use, unsubscribe from channels you don't watch and delete apps that don't serve you etc)

!change your habits/ways and get rid of the old ones (try new things, listen to new music, wake up at a different time, eat new food, go to different places, go into a new store, get out of your comfort zone etc)

!complete hard tasks first thing (get them out the way)

!keep a list of things you want to achieve so you can strive for them everday (doesn't have to be a big thing, small steps are okay e.g. walking x amount of steps a day)

> academics

!create a study schedule

!use studying techniques

!read often and always aim to improve

!complete homework as soon as it's set

!study and use other things as rewards (x amount time of studying before calling a friend or playing a game)

!make time throughout the day to revise

#dream girl #self worth #glow up #new years #that girl #self improvement #self growth #self care

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divinatorydoll · 9 months

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how mars in capricorn will affect us: 📝

mars has just moved into the ambitious, intelligent sign of capricorn !! because of it's determined and goal-driven nature, mars finds his exaltation in capricorn; the sign tempers his insatiable passion and channels his zeal into useful results.

the exaltation of a planet is the sign where a planet functions efficiently and faces little struggle. in capricorn, mars deals with few distractions and can patiently endure delays on the journey to achieving what he wants

mars will impact you differently based off the house(s) it transits while moving through capricorn. read more below !!

MARS IN CAPRICORN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSES:

mars in the 1H: this can be a healing and clarifying time for people struggling with their identity or feeling lost in their sense of self. perhaps if you're looking for more direction, a clearer sense of purpose, or even just a sign that you're on the right path, mars in capricorn will provide it to you !! tune into your inner wisdom and focus on yourself first

mars in the 2H: this is a wonderful time to develop more financial freedom through saving your money and investing in things that grow over time. but there can also be frustration with managing too many new investments. try learning more about big financial commitments before putting too much on your plate at one time

mars in the 3H: you'll find that mars' energy in your 3H can make you much more opinionated and ready to share your thoughts about things. while wisened by experience, mars in capricorn can be inflexible with its perspective. try not to be so readily defensive about your ideas and allow people to have their own viewpoints on things. make an effort to learn from your elders right now as well

mars in the 4H: during this transit, try having a more minimalistic attitude when it comes to your home decor. generally speaking, a planet in capricorn moving into your 4H is great for slimming down on unnecessary domestic possessions. aside from that, carve out some time to organize your living space and figure out your 'priority items'

mars in the 5H: mars moving throughout the 5H always lives up one's sex life, but in capricorn, you may find yourself deepening your relationships with people you have sexual encounters with !! this may be less of a hookup time for you and more of an emotional friends with benefits time !! this is also a helpful transit for detaching yourself from old, limiting traditions and creating new, exciting ones

mars in the 6H: with mars rejoicing in the 6H, it tends to be a lot easier to get along with business partners and authority figures at your workplace. in the house of health and everyday rituals, it'll be important to develop a more solid daily routine that benefits your wellbeing. try out a new low-impact exercise if you can, such as tai chi, yoga, jogging, or swimming !!

mars in the 7H: this a great time for resolving conflict in your intimate relationships. with capricorn as the sign of maturity, mars' movement here will help you handle disagreement patiently and productively. this ingress can also help people become less sensitive to public opinion and more self-reliant !!

mars in the 8H: this is perfect for absolving debt and effectively managing important monetary contracts. inheritance and loan disputes will be easily handled, as well as any confusion surrounding joint bank accounts, taxes, interest rates, and payment plans. this will also be a good time to broaden your understanding of the occult and new ritual practices !!

mars in the 9H: those in collegiate environments will have a much better time completing schoolwork, meeting deadlines, and handling academic pressure. this can be a fulfilling period of cultural exploration and travel. but with mars (frustration) in the 9H, you may have to prepare yourself for some annoyances on your vacations

mars in the 10H: an excellent transit for career building and elevating your professional impact. mars represents business management and competitive work. so while exalted, this can bring you more entrepreneurial opportunities and better status in a saturated business market !! this can also be a fun period of learning more about history, engineering, or athletics !!

mars in the 11H: this is a prosperous time for making business connections with people in your social circles !! working collaboratively with your friends will be highly rewarding, and the fruits of your labor will be long-lasting (♑︎). right now it's good to observe your friends and see which ones are truly protective of you vs. the ones that say they care and won't act on it

mars in the 12H: understanding your dreams is usually much easier during this transit, but mars here can make your dreams more violent or aggressive — try to express your anger in your waking life so it doesn't end up in your dreams when you're trying to rest !! if you've been having any off feelings about someone, mars in capricorn (reality) will confirm these suspicions clearly

book a reading !!

my linktree

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themotherofhorses · 5 months

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Hey,

I was wondering if you were going to finish any of your aemond fics??? No rush or hate just curious :)

Hello, sweetheart! I’m so terribly sorry for being super duper late at answering this question. I’ve been completely AWOL for months; y’all deserve an explanation why.

Explanation below the cut (mentions of an ED (one word), racism, and death threats):

To answer your question — I would LOVE to finish my Aemond fanfics; however, it probably won’t happen until much later (maybe when S2 is released).

The reason? Around late 2023, I decided to take a step away from the HOTD fandom. The reasons were pretty mundane, if I’m honest:

— I became gradually disinterested in the show.

— Academics took over my priorities.

— My attention shifted to different topics; for example, the Call of Duty franchise and personal OCs of mine.

However. HOWEVER, in wake of certain (and VERY tragic) circumstances, I would also like to share my personal experiences with the racism plaguing the community.

As you all know, I’m a mixed Indigenous and Hispanic woman; this isn’t a surprise. I’m very proud of my heritage. But, around April 2023, I began receiving an incredible amount of racially-motivated hate. Over the span of months, anonymous slurs clogged up my inbox (e.g., “squaw,” “reservation indian,” “beaner,” and “mojado”) while other anons sent me a slew of death threats and other ill-mannered comments, especially involving my anorexia.

In fact—around September of 2023–I was actually told to “unalive myself” because my OC’s (Balenyra Red Rivers) main nickname (baby bal) was similar to another fandom writer’s nickname. Now, allow me to explain:

the reasoning for the nickname “baby bal” is because my Bal’s characterization included being introverted and sweet. Think of her like Fluttershy from MLP (perhaps a random comparison but it’s the truth! Ask @chainsawsangel. She’s like Bal’s other mother).

I also call my Bal “babybal cheese,” even though she’s lactose intolerant like me.

Anyways. That’s off topic. Receiving racist messages like that truly dampens a person’s mood. What is the point of writing if every time you open this app, you’re met face-to-face with such racism?

Because of such, I decided to go on a HOTD-hiatus, and focus my energy on other things.

BUT. BUUUTTTTTT:

As long as the river flows and the grass grows, I will have deep love for my fanfics, as well as all my beloved mutuals.

Truth be told, the HOTD fandom does possess an exceptional amount of talented and amazing writers, many of whom I’ve been blessed to meet. While the fandom isn’t calling my name back right now, I hope to return in the future, to finish all my work.

Ahé'hee to everyone who had supported me in this journey, in both the HOTD and CoD worlds! 🫶🏼

EDIT: I accidentally got a date wrong in the post. Fixed it. It was meant to say ”2023” — I said “2024”.

#vic talks #ask #hotd fandom #house of the dragon fandom #hotd fandom drama #anti fandom #somewhat #idk how to tag this #like racism??😭

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gottawriteanegoortwo · 8 months

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Acting Attorney: The Props that Shape Our World

When you step out into the world on your own in university, there are many new challenges to face as part of growing up.

But what do you do when you have a crush on your best friend’s childhood friend? And worse… What do you do when your best friend knows?

Word Count: 2,655

University was a strange place. Uncharted territory. Countless unknowns. You found you were constantly bracing yourself for the worst. Someone would pull the rug out from under you and deem you unworthy of attending this course. Someone would come up from behind and stab you in the back while taking what little savings you had. Something, inevitably, would happen, and these safe spaces that you were only starting to get used to would be lost forever. This was all too good to be true.

The betrayal you were expecting. But never from Damien. Never about Mark.

The first meeting had not gone well. Mark had specially travelled to the campus for a visit. His academic hours were far fewer, allowing him more time to make the short journey to where you and Damien were staying. You were left with a sour taste in your mouth because Mark oozed rich kid energy and seemed so out of touch with reality. You could have said the same about Damien, but Damien at least was raised in an overly sheltered, narrow-minded environment. Mark didn't have that same excuse.

You would have left it there, but you couldn't disappoint your friend. It was a begrudging promise that paid off. The second time Mark came over, it was to get out of his own place for a little while. He was stressed, pacing back and forth across the tiny living room with such intensity that you were surprised a path hadn't been worn into the floor by the time you arrived. He had his first performance exam coming up, and the nerves were kicking in. Damien had quietly explained to you that Mark always hated exams, especially auditions, even though he was more than capable. When he stepped out to fetch drinks, you had stepped in to help.

Somehow, you had pried the book from Mark's hands and began to guide him through the soliloquy he was assigned. Damien was right - Mark was confident in the performance, but it was the worry of ruining an opportunity that was eating him alive. When Damien returned with three glasses of water, you suggested that the legal students should pretend to be an audition panel, even going as far as pulling out the heavy winter scarves and messing each other’s hair to complete your "disguises". It had been so ridiculous, but it worked. Mark couldn't stop snickering, and afterward had questioned whether you had missed your calling in the theatrical world.

His grateful smile after it all stuck with you for some time. Just when you thought you could box everything up and move on, Mark would swing by, and you'd have to start all over again. You'd keep this to yourself. You had more important things to focus on. A crush was not one of them!

But Damien. Your best friend, your worst traitor. He grew up in the legal world. He was an ace in reading body language and subtle cues. When you tried to insist you saw Mark simply as a friend, you knew he didn't believe you (truthfully, you didn't believe yourself either). You had never seen him give such a mischievous smirk when he was presented with clear proof of your infatuation from your disastrous attempts to lie. When you pleaded with him not to say anything, Damien had promised you he'd never initiate such a conversation with the man of the hour.

Nothing more was said.

Trusting Damien to leave it in the past was a mistake.

Your course was on break for a week, and he decided that the two of you should pay Mark a visit for a chance. It was in the same city, nothing a short bus trip couldn't handle. However, he immediately set off toward the main campus instead of what looked like the residential area.

"Mark mentioned in his last letter to me that he was helping his tutor go through the storage backstage," Damien explained as he pushed one of the doors open. "I'd hazard a guess he's still poking around here. If he had any excuse to spend more time around props when we were children, he'd take it. Otherwise, we follow the, uh��" He trailed off, passing the page he had been carrying to you. Instead of writing out an address and directions, Mark had opted to draw a map.

Ordinarily, a map would be a fantastic aid, a guide through the labyrinth of buildings and streets to help lost travellers find their way. Unfortunately, in his excitement of potentially having visitors, Mark had made what was frankly the worst map you had ever seen:

It was made in a hurry by someone with a heavy colouring pencil and no eraser. The road outline was scribbled over several times to try and hide a mistake. One building had an extra piece attached to it, while another had a corner that was slightly scribbled out. His pencil had even made a small hole in the paper from the pressure. Finally, the rectangle in the top-right had a poorly drawn face with two bold arrows pointing to it. However, Mark had neglected to label a single thing. Without suitable directions (or even any sort of visual landmark), you understood why the university was the safer option.

You handed it back with a grimace and Damien swiftly pocketed it. At least the floorplan in the main entrance hall was easier to navigate than Mark’s diagram of lines and boxes.

The auditorium was nothing like the lecture halls you attended. While those were tiered seating with built-in chairs and long tables, this was a single level hall with a large stage at the back. Chairs were set up in neat rows, with a gap in the middle for the main aisle. You did recall Mark talking about lectures happening here. Without even a small table clipped onto the side of the chair, you felt sorry for the students that would try to take notes here. Surely students couldn’t take notes here, right? They would have terrible back strain!

Damien had approached an older lady and asked her if she had seen Mark. She pointed to the back and said he would be finishing up soon. Once she had hurried off, he led the way backstage.

"Really, Mrs Butterly. I told you I can manage this just - Damien!" Mark scrambled out of the prop set he was tangled up in so he could charge over and pull the law student into a tight hug. Then, as he pulled back, he noticed you standing just behind Damien. There was a flash of confusion that was quickly replaced with a grin. "I thought Damien said you had study classes today. Come here!"

As you were pulled into a hug, you glared at Damien. In response, he shrugged with feigned innocence. "Apologies. I must have misremembered my dates. Mayhaps that is happening next week?"

"To-may-to, to-mah-to. Doesn't matter. You're both here! And it's the perfect time to do so. Once I finish here, I'll be free for the day. Is there anything at all you want to do?"

"Find a bathroom," Damien unceremoniously answered when Mark moved back toward the boxes.

"Oh! That's simple. Go back out the auditorium the way you came, then take the left corridor beside the steps. You should see the door signs from there."

"Thank you. Won't be long."

It wasn't until Damien was gone that you realised you had been betrayed. He left you! Alone! With Mark! How on earth were you going to get out of this??

An idea hit you as you stepped over a box and asked what Mark was even doing.

"I volunteered to help one of my lecturers go through some of the props we store backstage. They want to take inventory to see what we can keep and what we can throw away to replace. It's a treasure trove, and we've barely scratched the surface. I'm just putting all these items away."

A large assortment of items were scattered around the floor surrounding the three large boxes: mugs, books, gardening tools, board game pieces, empty photo frames, folded cloth, and that was at a glance. A fourth box was behind Mark, the flaps on top loosely closing it. In the distance, you could make out other large containers stacked against the walls.

You offered to help tidy things away, and Mark was delighted to have another pair of hands. As you gathered the pieces of a chess set, Mark explained that there was currently no system as to where to return items. The plan over the upcoming summer break was to renovate the storage space, and then better homes would be assigned for items in the fall.

You admitted it sounded like a lot of work, and Mark agreed.

"You don't realise how much goes into acting. In order to recreate the feeling of watching life unfold, you need everyday items." As an example, he lifted an empty tool bag, "But with so many stories, there are so many props. It's a world all its own. It follows the rules we expect, but has its own laws." As he lowered the bag into one of the boxes, you found yourself unable to look away from the sweet, wistful smile on his lips that often appeared when he could talk about the arts. "It's easy to lose yourself in all the things you can find. Life seems so much simpler in a story, and yet… It's a weird world. We found two broken tubas this morning. Not even Mrs Butterly, the head of drama, could tell me why they were here."

The ridiculous example, along with Mark turning his attention to you, wasn't what you expected, and it brought out a surprised snort. The moment seemed to spur inspiration that brought joy to Mark's face.

When you later found a set of thimbles, questioning why actors needed something so tiny that the audience wouldn't even see, Mark reached over and snatched one out of the box, along with his coat. In moments, he had created a scene of an older lady standing by the window, trying to focus on her sewing when she knew her granddaughter was in the maternity ward. His hand shook, miming the needle pricking his hand despite the thimble.

"- which symbolises that despite the familiar security, the suspense for big news has her distracted." He carefully returned the thimble to its place once he had finished demonstrating his improvised scene, and dumped the coat back on the ground. "Even if the audience can't see it, it helps the actor portray a scene to the best of their ability. You get what I mean?" Chocolate eyes glanced to the side to look you in the eye, and you nodded with a breath caught in your throat. Whatever he saw on your face was enough to prompt Mark to drop to his knees and rummage through the box.

"It's like, uh…" Several things were lifted and taken out. Mark was muttering, stalling for time while searching for something. You stayed on your feet as you peered into the box, like you could somehow magically know what he was looking for. It meant that you could see the way his face lit up when he grabbed a small box and presented it up to you.

"Like this! To the audience, this box could be anything, but you and I can see the fake glass in the lid to allow us to peer in and see what's really inside." You gasped. It was a beautiful golden pocket watch. The face was a pale cream with bold, black Roman numerals circling it. The hands were stuck at half-past two, but that didn't matter. "It adds to the surprise when the audience sees what your character is excited about, only having to wait a moment for you to open it and share the discovery with them."

"Something to share with me?" A new voice startled you both, heads spinning to see Damien leaning against the wall with arms crossed. "Well, I didn't think you'd propose quite this fast, Mark."

Your head whipped back to look at Mark, suddenly keenly aware of the situation. Him, kneeling on one leg with the other raised and foot on the ground for better support. You, standing as you hold a generic jewellery box. You felt your face heat up as you watched Mark's cheeks begin to turn rosy, only to glance away and try to admire a ladder resting against the wall when Mark caught your eye. Anything was better than looking at Damien's smug face. He was probably relishing seeing his two friends caught right in the middle of a moment.

"I, uh, well, it's more that…" Mark fumbled over his words as the ability to give a reasonable explanation was surprisingly sparse. It was as though something was very suddenly on the forefront of his mind and he was trying very hard not to blurt something out about it. "We were - we were acting! Testing their ability to react to a present."

"Uh huh…." Damien wasn't convinced, even if it was the truth. "So, do I get to be best man?"

"Damien, you are one of the best men I know."

"You're still kneeling."

That, finally, prompted you and Mark to break from the prolonged freeze-frame and scrambled to his feet with such haste that he nearly tripped into the crate. Dropping the jewellery box back where it belonged, uncaring whether it landed safely, you surged forward to help rescue Mark before he became part of the prop inventory.

"Hey, uh… sorry. For putting you in that situation, I mean. I didn't realise what I was doing…"

"Living out your daydreams?"

"Can you stop being a third wheel for ten seconds, Damien?"

Your gaze lowered for a moment while you struggle to think of a response. Was Mark apologising for the embarrassing situation, or for having feelings for you?

"Are you okay?" Cautiously, Mark rested a hand on your shoulder. Your silence had made him grow hesitant. "I've made you uncomfortable, haven't I?" You shook your head, deciding to redirect focus back to him with your question of whether he was uncomfortable. "Me? I, um, I don't want you to think that I am at all because, well -"

"He wants to ask you out for drinks."

"DAMIEN!!"

"What? You said ten seconds. I gave you fifteen!" Damien raised his hands in self-defense, but you knew that smile was one that was tinged with evil. He was enjoying every minute of this. "Look. You've both danced around this for weeks. And since you've both foolishly confided in me, I decided to take matters into my own hands instead of subjecting myself to any more of this farce. The feelings are mutual, so we should hurry up and get this tidied up so you two can go out and enjoy yourselves."

In all the time you knew Damien, you never expected him to be so blunt about a matter like this. Judging by how Mark's mouth was gaping open like a fish, he was thinking the same. Damien casually stepped around the two of you and began lifting the scattered props like he hadn’t just dropped the biggest secret you and Mark had been desperately trying to hide from one another out of fear of rejection.

"Would you be okay with that?" Mark's whisper caught your attention. When you confirmed as much, Mark leaned over to kiss your cheek. "We'll plan something nice when we're back at my place." He turned away with the intention to help Damien. But when you didn’t move, seemingly still trying to comprehend the last few minutes with eyes lowered, he returned to your side and gently squeezed your hand.

You looked up at him. He smiled.

Somehow, you knew that smile read ‘I love you’.

#writersofmark #acting attorney #actor mark x reader #who killed markiplier #selfshipping #wkm actor mark #mayor damien #(look. I like writing a sweet Actor.)#(read more is for tidiness! :D )

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