#also as a fuck you to tumblr at large:

[the-dragon-girl-27]

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

you are greeted by...... her

[hiding-under-the-willow]

anyways. What

[wosemi-sama]

hellooo ^^ i saw ur requests were open...

could you write a little silly thing with the obey me brothers and a child!mc who swears up and down that they'll marry him? typical funny "child doesnt understand the full meaning of marriage they just think its the ultimate form of love" trope.

ermmm sure ‼️‼️‼️ i gotchu anon. i think child mc is very silly™️

lucifer

Lucifer worked on his paperwork at his desk, as you talked his ear off with all about your day, sitting on one of the chairs of his secret study. As usual, he paid no mind to you minus the usual nod or hum, his attempt at making you feel acknowledged.

That was, until, you somehow brought up the subject of your future wedding. He looked up at you, his attention no longer directed at his papers.

"Excuse me..?" Lucifer's eyes widened as they always do when he's surprised. He was in complete shock.

"Yeah! Our wedding. So we can spend the whole day together!" You seemed to be delighted, already planning your father-child day in your head.

"Dear, if you wanted to spend the day together, you could just ask." He stopped writing and put his pen down.

"Really? But you're always so busy!" You frowned, Lucifer frowned with you at your response.

"Do I really seem busy?" You nodded, confused as you thought he already knew how little he's spent time with you lately.

Lucifer sighed. "I'll see if I can clear my schedule and I'll spend all tomorrow with you. How does that sound?"

You hummed in agreement, already ecstatic for tomorrow.

mammon

To celebrate his recent win at the casino yesterday night (unbeknownst to you), he took you to eat at the fanciest restaurant in the Devildom he knew.

He told you to get dressed in your fanciest clothes and to meet him at HoL's front entrance, covering your eyes as the two of you drew nearer to the restaurant.

Later, you were both sat down at a table near the entrance, eating your meals.

"This is so good! I can't wait until our wedding!" You exclaimed with a mouth full of food.

Mammon's grip on his fork loosened. He dropped it on his plate. "Our huh. Our wha...? Repeat that?" Mammon was stunned.

"Our wedding!"

"Do... do ya know what a wedding is?" Mammon asked you, serious for once.

"Well... no, but-!" Mammon interrupted you. "Aha! Knew it! Don't go sayin' things like that, ya hear?"

You sighed. "Okay...."

leviathan

Huh.

Huh?

HUH?!

"W-what did you just say?!" He put down his controller and turned to you, forgetting all about the Devil Kart game he was playing with you.

"Yeah, when we get married-"

Levi cut you off. "Nooope! Not happening."

"What? Why not!!" You seemed genuinely curious, so he answered. "People get married when they love each other."

"Huh. But I love you!" You seemed very confident with your response.

Levi was stumped, unsure of how to explain it differently.

"Y-you know what, nevermind." He decided that you'd understand what marriage is and how it works when you're older. Probably. Hopefully.

satan

You sat there patiently, listening to the bedtime story Satan was reading to you. It was a story from the human world, one you've heard a dozen times, yet you don't get tired of stories as long as Satan's reading them to you.

Everything was going normally until Satan got to the end of the book, the part where the prince marries the princess. "Satan, I'm gonna marry you one day!" You sat up from your comfy spot on your bed.

"I'm sorry, you're going to what?" Satan was speechless, unsure of what to do or say. Does he keep reading? Does he explain to you what you just said?

"Well, it says the princess and the prince love each other." You pointed to the page picturing the princess and prince's wedding. Satan nodded and you continued. "When you get married, it's because you love each other, right?"

"Well, not familiarly. You get married to someone you're romantically attached to." Satan explained.

"Oh. Okay!" You had no idea what either of those words meant, but you laid back down anyway, ready for Satan to continue reading.

Satan looked at the clock on your nightstand. "It's getting past your bedtime, little one." He began to close the book. You put your hand on the page that was open to stop him. "Please, just five more minutes! The story's almost over, anyway!"

Satan sighed. "Alright, five more minutes."

asmodeus

"Hmm? Our wedding?" Asmodeus was confused, to say the least.

Asmo brushed your hair, fixing it up in time before breakfast. You sat on the edge of his bed as he talked to you about all the new hair products he got you yesterday while shopping. Well, until you began talking about your future wedding together.

You nodded, he stopped brushing your hair, the brush still in his hands as he held it in the air. "Yeah, our wedding!"

"Why would we have a wedding, hon?" Asmodeus questioned you. He watched as you sputtered, trying to come up with an answer. He just giggled at you and smiled. "That's just not possible, dear." He continued to brush your hair.

"Huh? Why not?!" You seemed hell bent on marrying him, for familiar reasons of course, but nobody knew how to explain that to you.

"Hmm, I'm not sure how to explain it..." Asmodeus looked for an answer, hoping it would suddenly pop up in his brain.

Unfortunately, that light bulb in his head didn't light up, so Asmo stayed quiet and continued to brush your hair.

beelzebub

Even though it was a Saturday, everyone (mostly Lucifer) was still on about how you had woken up late. Everyone except Beelzebub, of course. He had even saved you a plate at breakfast! How kind and caring!

As you sat down at the dining table, he handed you the plate of food. You thanked him. It wasn't often the glutton would save someone food, unless it was you.

"Thanks, dad! I'm gonna marry you!" You hugged him tight, exciting for him to save you food every morning once you got married.

Beelzebub was... confused, to say the least. He continued to munch on his food, not sure how to act next.

He swallowed before speaking. "That's not how that works..." He looked around the room, looking for an answer. "Maybe you'll get married one day, just not to me." He finally decided on his answer, looking at you now.

"Okayyy..." You didn't understand, but who were you to ever argue with him?

belphegor

Belphie crouched and peaked his head under the blanket roof of the pillow fort you carefully constructed with him. "I got you something." He was hiding something behind his back. He took it out from behind, and there was a soft cow plushie in his hands. He smiled upon seeing your excitement towards it.

He gently put the cow plushie in your hands. You held it tight as you lay against the pillows, on top of the blanket flooring."Thank you, Belphie!" He hummed. "Heck, I might even marry you!"

The Avatar of Sloth raised an eyebrow.

"What...?" He questioned you quietly. You nodded. He knew it was just a saying, but he was slightly concerned. Asmodeus said that a lot. Was he finally rubbing of on you?

He finally went inside the pillow fort and got cozy. He took a pink blanket and covered you with it. It was silent for a bit.

"Where'd you learn that from?" He finally spoke, breaking the silence. "Asmo!" You exclaimed, holding the cow plushie even tighter.

"Ah." He knew it. He took the yellow blanket next to him and covered his legs, as he didn't feel like tucking in his upper half. The blanket had white stars scattered on the fabric.

He felt his eyes fluttering. He was about to fall asleep, but he still had something he wanted to say to you.

The pillow fort was quiet. You grabbed the book that was in between you and Belphie to begin reading where you left off. Before you could, Belphegor broke the silence once again.

"Hey..." He began. You looked up at him from your book. "Don't go around saying stuff like that, okay?" You flashed him a smile and gave him a thumbs up. That was the last thing he saw before falling asleep.

[arson-09]

tonights acotar thoughts are with the Illyrian women and how rhysand has utterly failed them despite his supposed efforts

Hes ‘allowed’ them to become warriors if they wish. But thats not even the bare minimum. from my memory he acknowledges that he doesnt enforce the wing clipping laws (smooth move) so that’s basically useless and as to be expected of a man, he misses the point of feminism and equality laws. WHERE are the laws and protections for women in marriages?? if the illyrian are so ‘brutal’ and ‘backwards’ the assumption can be made that divorce isn’t a thing unless the man requests it. No women requested divorces and probably no such thing as no fault divorces. As well as forced marriages (which also brings up the consent age) Adding on, what about abortions and other pre natal and natal laws and protections? again, assuming women arent allowed to have abortions or simply any bodily autonomy, where are those decrees rhysand? Im not even getting into the potential of LGBTQ+ illyrians and their rights (Logically there are LGBTQ+ illyrians but ofc sjm wouldn’t mention them)

He makes such a fuss about it being a womans choice (a hypocrite as we see in acosf) yet unless a woman is able too or wants to fight he doesnt seem to care. Which is also a major flaw of sjms writing, women only gain their independence if they can kick ass and fuck as they want. Which is of course valid but thats a very shallow way to view feminism and equality. The whole point is that a woman can choose, wether its to be a warrior or a stay at home mother, but theres nothing done for those women who want that lifestyle.

This has influenced me in my fic writing a lot to where a this topic has become a major focal point in my fic somewhat by accident. I think that logically there would be a rebellion from mostly illyrian women against rhysand, hes promised them so much yet has delivered so little.

[llitchilitchi]

sometimes I wish this site had a mute option

[utilitycaster]

bitchy opinion but I'm already tired of cross-fandom thematic brackets; this is both because I've seen an multiple extremely basic errors (bc presumably OP is not a fan of the specific work in question and too lazy to do any research) and also because it mostly turns into a map of which work is more popular on Tumblr, rather like that xkcd which maps trends to just a simple population density map.

[mwagneto]

i haven't been in inner budapest at night in agessss coz im always home or at least at someone's home by this point so i forgot just how annoying the impenetrable wall of drunk tourists is. can you get out of my fucking house please

[lighthouseborn]

you know. i really wouldn't mind the beta-editor version of formatting so much if not for the goddamn pickiness of the highlight. literally why does it do all that just highlight the text! this is not a complicated thing i am asking!

[hungerpunch]

fun fact 12 step programs were developed by two white christian men in 1930s america

[night-triumphantt]

OCs as a love language.

@sysba beloved tagged me and, I’m devastated by these quiz results (Also idk who to tag??)

Cal - a story that ends in blood

The world has always been unkind, and when you have turned to yourself for comfort you have come face to face with an empty pit which seems to be laughing. You don't care if it kills you but once you find someone whom you love and who loves you back, you will make sure nothing happens to them. They are yours. You will make a tear in this world and create a new place for you and your love if it comes to that. Because it has always been about love, and it is how it always ends.

Suraya - a knife called grief

You have left your house, you have left those people behind, but what are you going to do about the memories which have taken root in you? You can run but not without them. You want someone to sit with you on this cool marble floor while the sun burns everything.You want them to cut your rotten heart and theirs too. You want to sit with it in front of you, let them see you with all your flaws, which haven't been your fault but you have been made to believe so, and you want them to love you anyways. Because you know you'd do that for them.

Kiara - an undoing influence (I’m so?? Not her nd Edith being the same)

Can someone tell you what to do? You have been carrying so much love within you for so long it is starting to turn into anger (why does it matter, all you see is red anyways) and you have been dragging this body through each day and every night you are split open on your bed and it is so so so lonely. If someone were to walk in while you were on your bed that way and they stitched you back in a new way, lining the seams with their love and kisses, you'd probably find this dreary world a little more bearable. You want someone to turn you over and over until you look in the mirror and see yourself looking back at yourself with a gentleness which has been lacking in you since forever.

Silas - violent devotion

Everyone seems to think you are faithless, but the thing is you haven't yet found someone who will bring you to your knees and make you raise your head in reverence. This world has stopped bringing you joy, you want more of the divine. You want to dedicate your entire existence to someone; you want to make them realise they are not something terrible, make them see just how much beauty they are bringing to this world. You want to be the only one for them, the only one they have chosen to love. There's a god shaped pit inside of you and only they can fit in it. And what if they choose to walk away? Didn't I say this was violent devotion?

[sophism]

I am truly aware of how this sounds prima facie aksjhdajhdkajs but I think that my potentially most controversial opinion of all time that is truly susceptible to being wildly misconceived by people that are not willing to think about it on a #deeper level is that Harry Styles has actually been a victim of systemic misogyny on the same level, if not more so than Taylor Swift lmao

[essektheylyss]

I put my big wip playlist in alphabetical order (it's more of the playlist for a world than for a specific storyline) so it doesn't actually have a narrative to it, but also it actually does work to play it in order, and some of it has ended up wildly affecting by pure chance based on what I put on it, especially in comparison to what the songs signify, so every time I get to the sequence of "Heirloom" (Sleeping At Last) > "Hey Brother" (Avicii) > "If I Had A Heart" (Fever Ray), I have no choice but to sit quietly in a corner and lose my goddamn mind for a while. Cannot recommend this sequence of songs enough if you ever want to experience shrimp emotions.

[birdmenmanga]

some kind of moodboard

@birdmenanime @kitsoa

[camgoloud]

i mean like. okay fair. but you do realize what website you’re saying these words on right

[khalaris]

Falsch verpackt (2012)

[belfrygargoyles]

holly is nb not in the “oh being intersex means youre nonbinary or trans by default (which is objectively false)” way but in the “was the firstborn child of two parents with expectations that ranged wildly on either end of an extreme spectrum and didn’t take it well when their child didn’t go through puberty the way they expected lending to the development of an intense loathing both for said parents and for the idea of being gendered by other people entirely” way