#also can i just say that the burn dungeon has the best lighting

[sealrock]

'official' renders

[peach-and-bugs]

🖤She’s All That I’ve Got - Captain Phasma x fem!Reader🖤

Royalty Enemies to Lovers Au

Fanfiction master list

Summary: y/n's kingdom has fallen under the iron fist of the Empire despite her best efforts. But, much to her surprise, she's been allowed to live. She knows that Ren must want something from her or her kingdom, but that's for the future. as of right now, she has been granted permission to move about the grounds as she might have normally before. However, she will always be under the watchful eye of Ren's trusted Captain Phasma, head of his stormtrooper army…

Warnings: mentions of death, near violence

Word Count: 2,448

A/N: here's my first real medieval Au! Reader is referred to as high priestess instead of princess just because I like it better, but both titles are synonyms so they can be used interchangeably. And for a little lore dump, I wanted to keep the same kind of weapons and designs since this is StarWars, but troopers instead have normal swords and medieval-akin weapons while Jedi (or ren in this case) still has a lightsaber. but rather than being made of tech it's kind of like an enchanted sword thanks to the kyber crystal embedded in the handle. The force also exists, but its viewed more so as sorcery

She’s All That I’ve Got Tag List: @idontlikepexple

Captain Phasma Tag List:

General Tag List: @summergeezburr

-🖤-

Never before would you have anticipated finding so much comfort in your father’s untimely death. Yet, you are, curled up in the corner of a locked cell, deep in your castle's dungeon. Your day dress had grown muddled with mildew and general stone grime. This of course was due to the dungeon's lack of maintenance, because why would you clean it regularly when no one would be held down there? Your small country had come upon a benevolent time of peace after all. Or at least it had been a time of calm before the Empire decided it needed to step in.

Your eyes had begun to burn now having run dry from tears. You knew they would be red by now. Puffy and sore from rubbing them raw in an attempt to keep what little composure you could still. They’d locked you down here hours ago. How many hours was up for anyone to say, but it had been some time. The invasion had ceased outside the walls of your castle, but you could still hear your people's faint cries and shouts in your mind's eye. 

Even if you'd done everything you possibly could, there had to have been something that had slipped your mind. This had to have been avoidable, right? You tisked yourself for the consideration. Your father wouldn’t have dwelled on this had it been him locked in this muddy cell. He would have held his chin up and found some sort of resolution. Well, you weren't your father. And by the look of things, you wouldn’t be leaving this cell for some time. Maybe yous die here. That sounded about right. You'd die here on the cold and wet stone floor only to be reunited with your father once again in the afterlife. Or maybe the empire would spare you the time and host one of those lovely public executions in front of the dwindling number of your people that would venture into the square. You weren't sure which you'd prefer at this point.

It appeared you'd get your answer in a matter of minutes as you heard the low, growling scrape of the dungeon door as it ground against the stone floor, letting in the faintest light as two guards clamored down the stairs with a torch in hand. You scrambled to your feet. Pressing your back to the wall as they clanged toward your cell. You felt your breath quicken as the sound grew. Your feet squirmed under you, trying to warm your footing against the icy stone, though there was no real escape from the same stone chilling deep into your spine. The stormtroopers stopped abruptly, their black hole-like eyes boring into you as one fiddled with the keys to your cell. The door swung open with a clang that almost made you flinch but you held your ground.

“Master Ren is ready to speak with you,” one said. His voice was muffled and distorted by his faceless mask. Your muscles tensed as you flexed your fingers, squeezing your hands into tight fists. The troopers seemed to notice and subconsciously moved their hands to the hilts of their swords, firmly held at their hips. You forced yourself to relax, but still keep up your guard and nodded, telling them to lead the way. You approached the opened door, only to be stopped by a heald palm. You heard a tough clang of metal and looked down to find thick shackles held open to you. The trooper grunted at your hesitation, forcing you to reluctantly offer up your wrists. The metal was much colder on your skin than the cobblestone and it met your blood quickly thanks to your exposed pulse point. 

The trooper locked your wrists in tight and tugged at the metal chain’ checking its integrity before he turned to leave. This trooper began to lead the way with you hesitantly training out of your cell from behind. The second trooper took his place at the back of your little train, following you close with his hand gripping his hilt if you made any effort to run.

Emerging from the underground, you were met with the disheartening sight of imperial flags hanging high from the walls where your home colors used to reside. They were lazily put off but were scorn a stomach-churning shade of blood red. And upon exiting your dungeon, you were flanked by two additional escorts who had likely been waiting in case you dashed while still downstairs. Walking down the long, winding halls you were greeted with even more troopers lining the walls, watching you with prying eyes as you passed. 

Nevertheless, you held your head high. You refused to crumble, especially not in front of an audience. And oh, an audience you would have. Upon entering the throne room, formally your throne room, you were met with overwhelming sunlight and gaudy red redecoration. Stormtroopers lined the room, arms at the ready if you dared to run. And right above you, perched proudly on your father’s throne sat the revered and feared Master Ren. he watched you with keen eyes, his hand covering his chin and mouth. His brow was furrowed in consideration and you could have sworn he hadn't blinked since you entered his presence. 

As you approached with your entourage of guards, the two at your sides peeled off but were replaced by the originals who walked in front and behind. Your eyes began to wander, scanning your crowded surroundings. You took note of the weasely redhead standing at Ren’s left hand. He held his head high with a scrunched nose and evident grimace. He looked at you as though you were scum that has scuffed his boot. You offered a minuscule glare in return till you were stopped by the troopers at your side, who grabbed onto either of your forearms. You were held still, exposed in front of Ren with your shackled hands and waterlogged skirts. But you kept your head up. You wouldn’t shy away, not even now when one might think you looked like a beggar. 

Your eyes turned back to the General as he cleared his throat, he arched a brow and glanced at the ever-casual Ren, who nodded a finger without a word. Hux sniffed rather aggressively through his nose, then gave the guards at your sides a quick nod, and without any other form of warning, you were tossed to your knees in front of the throne, clumsily catching yourself with your shackled hands, which echoed a ghostly metal clang through the throne room. You managed to look up with a turnt grimace and a huff of exhaled air rustled loose hair that obstructed your face. This reaction seemed to mildly interest the lead invader but not by much. He sat up in your father’s chair, adjusting himself to get a better view of you. 

“Prop her back up,” his voice reverberated off of the walls of your throne room, but still came across as quiet, strangely enough. The guard said as they were told, grabbing onto your shoulders and roughly pulling you up onto your knees. Ren watched with growing interest, though he still looked like he could yawn quite easily at any given moment. “You know why we’ve come, don’t you?” he gripped the arm of your father's chair as his eyes scanned down your kneeled form. 

“I assume this is all an act of love or unity,” you bit back bitterly. “However you’re presenting yourselves these days,” you took in a long, loud breath through your nose, eyeing the Master and the General with a burning hatred in the crinkle of your nose and furrow of your brow. You saw a flex in the General’s frown, but Ren smiled. It was small, but a smile was there. He even let go of a low chuckle. 

“I admire your moxie, high priestess,” he began. Your title rolled off his tongue in a sickeningly sweet tone that made your skin crawl. “But I must cut to my point, I’m afraid,” he sighed, growing board of you once more. 

“I’ve decided to let you live,” he continued. Your eyes widened for a millisecond, but you insisted on keeping your surprise hidden tight under wraps. You couldn’t let him think you were grateful to him without risking inflating his already mountain-like ego. “However, of course, there must be conditions,” you bit the inside of your cheek at that, holding your tongue. Now it was time for Hux to speak up, for he cleared his throat quite loudly to grab your attention from his superior. You’d already grown further irritated by the man’s weaselly face and screwed frown. 

“You will be confined to the palace grounds at all times unless chaperoned by Master Ren himself. You are to stay out of all diplomacy, again, unless asked of by Master Ren,” you grew flabbergasted by what you were hearing and scoffed rather loudly, stopping Hux as he licked his lips to list off the last of your conditions. 

“You want me as a figurehead!” you barked. You swore you could hear gasping muffled under stormtrooper helmets as her room hushed. The General gritted his teeth and gripped the hilt of his weapon tight in his hand as he strode down the staircase before you. 

“You wretched girl-” he started. You pressed your lips in a fine line, ready for some type of impact as you squeezed your eyes shut, but the impact never struck. You heard pained grunting and upon opening your eyes again, the General stood tall before you, sword only partly drawn from its hilt. 

But the man couldn’t move. He has been frozen where he stood. Your breath had quickened but you dared to look behind him, only to find Master Ren having stood from the throne, hand outstretched as he watched Hux with shakingly focused eyes. You swallowed thickly, eyes returning to Hux who looked like he might turn purple if he wasn’t allowed air soon. 

You’d never seen sorcery like this in your life but your father had told you animated stories back when you were just a girl. He regaled the days when magic like this had been loved and revered, seen as a thing of light and peace. You'd learned and read all about the original sorcerer's order and how they made it their mission to preserve life and balance. Yet over the years it had become tainted, resulting in tyrants like Ren and his new order. Hux was released and nearly collapsed to the ground at your knees, but he managed to hold himself. He averted his eyes as he caught his breath, coughing as he took in previously denied air. You thought that you could almost smell the embarrassment on him.

“Now, that’s no way to address our guest,” Ren said with a snide hint in his voice. It was clear that he enjoyed the opportunity to one-up and show off to his general. That made sense, if you thought about it. A tyrant’s primary goal is to impress those they find small and weak. And guest? You held your tone, but how dare he call you a guest when he was sitting proudly in your chair and your house? You let out a huffed breath as Hux turned tail and took his post once more. 

“But yes, a figurehead, if you will,” Ren lowered himself back to his seat, crossing his leg over his knee as he lounged. He waved his hand back to Hux, urging the general to continue as he continued to watch you curiously. The general readjusted his uniform, offered his superior a silent glare, and cleared his throat once more. 

“When you are not accompanying Ren, you will be escorted everywhere by the head of our guard, Captain Phasma,” Hux snapped his gloved hand and the aforementioned Captain seemed to emerge from the shadows of Ren and his newly claimed throne. The first thing you took note of was that the captain was tall. Even from the distance you were at, you knew they were tall. Taller than both Hux and Ren. but besides that, there was nothing else about them you could gather. They hid their face behind a similar helmet to the members of their guard, only their armor was forged from shining platinum, aiding in their standout-ish demeanor. 

“Phasma will watch your every move and report back any suspicious activity that she might find, so no point trying anything,” Hux hissed, trying so hard to buy back any respect you might have had for him before. You were more held up watching the statuelike captain, but you did ponder part of what the general has said. She. The captain that stood taller than both her superiors was a she. Now, this fact didn’t change anything, but it did peak the bit of curiosity you still harbored. 

“Any questions?” the weasel interjected back into your thoughts. You turned to him with your hardest stare, then trained your eyes back on Ren. 

“No,” 

“Then that will be all,” Hux answered for Ren and turned on his heels in a hurry to leave the throne room. “Captain, you may take your leave and escort the high priestess to her quarters” the guards still standing at your side grabbed your underarms without warning and hoisted you to your feet. The Captain began her descent down the stairs, her footsteps echoing louder as she approached. A small part of you wanted to squirm at the grips on your arms, but you held your ground, standing as tall as you could and taking deep breaths. The captain stopped just a stride in front of you, tilting her helmeted head to the side ever so slightly as though she was observing you. And who was to say she wasn’t? It was impossible to tell with the helmet after all.

“Shall we leave, high priestess?” Her voice was lower than you might have expected, yet you found the question more surprising. You must have expected a demand from her before being asked a question. You nodded, possibly having grown trimmed due to her stature in front of you, or maybe from the illusion of you having a choice at all. She nodded to the guards at your side, who released your arms and turned around. Before you turned with them, you caught sight of Ren, moving to leave the say way the General had. He watched you leave with hard eyes and his lips squeezed together momentarily, almost as though he had more to say. But time had run short and you were forced to leave with your new entourage.

[formulaorange]

2024 Winter Anime

It's here! It's finally here!!! Solo Leveling comes out this season! There's definitely a few others to keep an eye out for but this is the star of the winter season:

Solo Leveling One of my most anticipated series. I'm caught up on the english light novels (8 volumes) and I'm honestly so invested in this story. In a way it gives the same impact as One Punch Man but if the story progressed a little faster toward fame and growth in his power. Easily the best of the season. Noteworthy On Going Shows: Frieren - Episodes 17-28 One of the most mesmerizing and well paced fantasies I've seen. Also one of my 10/10s of all time. Worth looking into if you remotely like fantasy. Shangri La Frontier - Episodes 14-25 Another fantasy game series that honestly just looks like it's a fun game. Explores a lot of game mechanics within this full-dive VR type game that almost puts SAO to shame. Fun action, fantasy and fun for game lovers. Apothecary Diaries - Episodes 13-24 My current favourite drama/romance/medical mystery series. The characters are simple but the show highlights the different dynamics and almost feels like an enemies to lovers plot. New Seasons:

Blue Exorcist - Season 3 This is one of the og shows I watched growing up. It's a mythology school themed show that I loved. It's been 13 years since season 1 aired and I'm stoked to see it come back. It's being done by a different studio since A-1 is busy with solo leveling, so I'm not sure if it'll hit the same but I'll still check it out at least for the nostalgia.

Mashle - Season 2 The funniest anime I've seen in a while. Man muscle brains his way through magic school and the whole show is a meme of harry potter and other magic series. Truly entertaining. Can't wait for this season

Delicious In Dungeon This is a series I've wanted to pick up the manga for for a while. It's about dealing with food and hunger when these adventurers are deep in a dungeon and learn to start cooking and eating what they can find down there. Funny concept but honestly looks like a lot of fun.

The Unwanted Undead Adventurer I read this manga and light novel so long ago. (Literal years - link to my manga thoughts and summary). I'm looking forward to the adaptation. I think nowadays this kind of story doesn't catch nearly as much attention as it did a few years ago. An adventurer dies in a dungeon and is reborn as an undead who can evolve as he kills other monsters and he deals with trying to fit in with the human realm again and evolving. I'm still looking forward to it after keeping an ear our for so long!

Mr. Villain's Day Off I recently heard about this series and thought it was such a cute concept. Us with all our villain complexes with enjoy this one. Will likely be a background show for me as there won't be a huge plot, regardless, still fun to watch. Burn the Witch - #0.8 - 30 min Special I think this won't be as exciting now that Bleach has come back and we aren't as depraved of Tite Kubo's work but I really enjoyed the original short series. Hoping for more of this world in the future. Sequels: Classroom of the Elite - Season 3 Tsukimichi - Season 2 (Link to review of season 1) The Dangers in My Heart - Season 2 More Continuations: Undead Unluck Ragna Crimson After going through 20+ shows every season, many with sub-par animations and the same fantasy twists, I've become real picky about which series are even worth trying to watch these days. Here are the ones that deserve at least 2 episodes in order: A Sign of Affection - Gets a special spot since it's incredibly rare to see disability representation in anime and it looks like it's done quite well- A romance between a guy and a deaf girl. Looks super sweet Bucchigiri?! - I honestly can't say this looks appealing to me personally but I've hear the name before and well it's MAPPA. (Give em a break) 'Tis Time for "Torture," Princess - looks well animated and just a fun watch Metallic Rouge - The sci-fi series for this season. I'm not sure I have it in me to watch something heavy like this this season but it looks decent. The Wrong Way to Use Healing Magic The Witch and the Beast - Here for manga readers - lowkey looks like the manga will be much better and this might be a skip for me. Hokkaido Gyaru's are super Adorable (Ecchi) ALSO - Big reminder: Haikyu!! and Demon Slayer have their movies coming out this season as well (both theatrical releases so keep an eye out!!!) Demon Slayer: To the Hashira Training - Feb 2nd 2024 Haikyu!! - The Dumpster Battle - Feb 16th 2024

[blodgmonster]

Queen of Shadows reread commentary part 2

-- Aedion: Ghost Leopards are awful, scary creatures. Please don't shift into one.

Lysandra:

-- Sin Eater has a temple filled with carved bones. Carved bones. Bone Carver. The bones in the sin eater's temple are confessions written before people died. The Bone Carver carves people's deaths. Very interesting.

-- "I'm doing this because I do not wish to see my queen become a demon herself." TOO LATE, LORCAN

-- "if it was death separating us...I would find you. I don't care how many rules it would break. Even if I had to get all three keys myself and open a gate, I would find you again. Always." ROWAN!!!!

-- "She'd forgotten the name she'd been given, but it made no difference. She had only one name now. Death, devourer of worlds." FUCK EM UP, KALTAIN.

-- "Hello, princling."

"Hello, witchling"

-- So Dorian has a moment where he regains control and THAT'S when Chaol decides he needs to be killed. He's such an IDIOT. I can hardly stand it.

-- "A monster incarnate. But perhaps the monsters needed to look out for each other every now and then." FUCK YEAH!!

-- FLEETFOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!! God, I want a dog.

-- "They tried to shoot my...Rowan through the heart." YOUR MATE! YOUR MATE

-- "Your mother went down fighting. She was a witch, and you are a witch, and you do not yield— you do not yield —" ELIDE SAYS YOU DO NOT YIELD FIRST

-- UNCLEAN. I'd call Manon's grandmother a cunt but she lacks the depth and warmth.

-- Aelin and Lysandra's friendship is just the BEST. And then of course we also have Manon and Asterin's friendship as well as Manon and Elide's friendship. I love well written female friendships.

-- "promise me...that you will walk out of that castle tomorrow." Nooooo not quite, Nesryn.

-- " WITCH KILLER — THE HUMAN IS STILL INSIDE HIM" Manon, I love you so.

-- "Light up the darkness, Majesty." "Light it up, Danika!"

-- Do we ever find out why Lorcan changed his mind and decided to help them after screwing them over so badly? I can't remember.

-- GHOST LEOPARD LYSANDRA COMING IN WITH THE HAIL MARY SAVE!!!!!! AND THEN NESRYN SAVES LYSANDRA! I forgot about that!

-- MANON SAVING ELIDE!!!!!!!! "Not one more. Not one more female would she allow them to take." FUCK YEAH!!

-- "It did not seem like a weakness to fight for those who could not defend themselves. Even if they weren't true witches." * screaming crying throwing up *

-- "You find Celaena Sardothien. Give her this. No one else. No one else. Tell her that you can open any door, if you have the key. And tell her to remember her promise to me — to punish them all. When she asks why, tell her I said they would not let me bring the cloak she gave me, but I kept a piece of it. To remember the promise she made. To remember to repay her for a warm cloak in a dark dungeon."

"She burned the cradles. She burned the monsters within. She burned the men and their demon princes. And then she burned the witches, who looked at her with gratitude in their eyes and embraced the dark flame."

KALTAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

-- Lysandra puking on Lorcan is priceless.

-- ohhhh Lorcan helped because he realized Aedion is Gavriel's son.

-- Aelin granting Lysandea land. The female friendships in this book are spectacular.

-- Eyllwe is free. Aelin wishes that Nehemia was there to see it. Me too. Me too.

-- "And at long last, Aelin Ashryver Galathynius was home."

I thought Heir of Fire was my favorite but it might actually be Queen of Shadows.

Up next I attempt the tandem read of EoS and ToD. We'll see how that goes...

[scopophobia-polaris]

Okay so someone said it the tags they want lore here we go

Ravio was born in the Dark World to a couple of Blind's thieves in the village of outcasts, as you can imgine, being raised by a bunch of guys that are all very interested in key items and money has formed a very....capitalistic mindset in him

Because of the Dark World's influence, Ravio was born in the shape of a rabbit, maybe because all kids are pure or whatever he thinks it's a little silly

He wishes he looked more like his parents, his dad being a goblin like creature and his other dad being uh..well not even he knows, but he thinks he looks the equivalent to a light world dog. Maybe.

Atleast it gave him a cool pair of sharp teeth in his mouth but everything else is bunny shaped

This also doesn't change when he enters the light world, Ravio is a "human" but just doesn't look like it to everyone, even someone who can see the truth will only see a funny bunny.

Ravio and Link are around the same age, but it turns out Link might be older by a smidge, much to the rabbit's annoyance because he IS taller...but maybe Link is older because he's the hero

I think Sheerow caught him and not the other way around

Sheerow and Ravio got some messed up magic stuff between them, as Ravio doesn't like going into dungeons he sends sheerow in instead and can seemingly see, hear and speak through the bird? Yeah a bird.

Imgine only having one (1) friend, her name is Halizah.

Halizah is infact the "Princess" of the Dark World

You won't believe who her Gramps is because not even Ravio can handle that one, they don't even look alike! She doesn't even have tusks!

For being such a coward he sure is a fast runner! Wait no that makes perfect sense actually...

His robes he made himself! He thought at first that maybe the way to make sure light world dwellers didn't freak out was to make a human suit. Halizah had to burn the first attempt

Yuga? Who's the hell is that all I know is Ganon and he won't even talk to us

This man cannot take criticism of his business practice unless it's Mr.Hero who says it 🥰

Actually if Link says anything Ravio is automatically turning his ears and listening

Link is really cool and is hero for a reason RIGHT?

Wrong. He's just a dude, and if Link is a dude and if Ravio is a dude then that means...he's Mr.Hero2

During AlttP Link fell into the Dark World up on Death Mountain, he was lost for a solid week until he found his house..? And a portal back inside, that's how he met Ravio already setting up shop in his not very abandoned house.

What do you mean you didn't use the mirror? If you pay me 5 dollars I can give you a tutorial on how to use it MEESTERR HEEROW 💀

We don't need to talk anymore, but Link is slightly weirded out that Ravio tucks him in at night, hes just trying to be kindly and trustworthy!! Also it's good business practice to treat your best customer a little diffrent than other customers 🥺

Actually wait Link, youre looking a little tired, if you want I can loan you a spot in my Sleeping bag so you don't gotta feel the cold chill of the ground when we're traveling come of pspsppsspspsps 🥺🥺🥺

Shockingly, the rabbit is not cool might be a bit of a fruit though

[knottyk]

Now, Kiss!

masterlist

Pairing: Eddie x Fem!Reader

Summary: You definitely and most certainly do not want to kiss Eddie freaking Munson… not in a million years and especially not in the school play.

Word count: 2.4k (my almost due essay is fuming)

tags: kinda fluff, theatre kid!reader, tiny bit of smooching, very subtle enemies to lovers, not slow burn, one shot

“Hail Lord Vecna.” Eddie chanted in whispers as the room fell silent. 

He continued to talk lowly, gradually creeping up to his feet from being seated on his throne. The rest of the party glued on Eddie as animates the story. 

“He is not only missing his left arm,” He towered over them as he covered an eye, arm over his head. “but his left eye!”

Shouts of protests and confusion filled the room as Eddie rests back on his throne, a satisfied grin painted on his face as he watched the chaos unfold. 

But the momentum is ripped harshly when the lights turned on with a sharp noise and everyone blinked to adjust their vision, the candles blown off with the sharp opening of the wooden doors. 

They looked around to see unfamiliar people walking into the room. 

“Hayden! You’ll scratch the wood, lift it up or I’ll use you as floor wax.”

“What the hell is this?” Eddie stands up and is mortified to see that his throne was immediately picked up from behind him and placed to the front stage. “This is an ambush. That’s what this is.” 

He held on to the arm of the chair, tugging back when the student carrying it attempted to pull it away. 

Your eyes doesn’t miss the way his muscles flexed under that stupid shirt, feeling like a total pervert for raking your eyes through his smooth skin and the tiny strands of fuzz on his arm. It’d probably tickle if you brush your arm on his. 

“Is this because I called your boyfriend out at lunch in front of his posse? Is that it? You’re fighting your little jock boyfriend’s battle for him?” He squinted and the kids are also confused. 

“You mean Carver?” You recoiled and scrunched your nose. “Hell no.”

But he just rambled, completely deaf to your defence. 

“Munson, stop. I have permission.” You held up a light green paper to his face and showed the timetable for the theatre booking. 

The student scurried away as Eddie’s grip loosened.

Drama Club 3:30 - 5:30pm  Thursdays and Fridays. Signed, Mr. Garry Cooper.

He blinked and took it slowly from you and you let him, head perking up with authority. But he rips it gently as he took it and you stared. 

You hummed. “Not surprised. That doesn’t do anything. Mr. Cooper has the final say and he says this is now reserved for the drama club.”

“No.” He mumbles repeatedly as he gives you a mean look. 

“We’ve always had this room at this time and date. You can’t do this!” He stares in shock, movements animated. 

You leaned over the table to collect the small trinkets, containing your patience which was quickly running out. “Yes, I can actually.“

“With those theatrics, you should be with us.” You handed him the dice, figurines and books “Too bad auditions are over.” 

With a snap of your finger, a couple of students swept the long table away and the only thing between you and Eddie is the lingering thick air. 

You felt tension creep up to your neck as the rest of his group watch you like a tennis match, eyes darting back and forth between you and their dungeon master. 

“Tickets will be up for sale soon.” You smiled and dusted your clothes, waving off the small particles floating mid air. “I’ll save you a seat.” 

Eddie mocked you as you walked past him and into the other side of the back stage. You heard his lips smacking as he scrunched his face to get at your nerves, twirling his hair to mimic what you apparently do. 

But instead of retorting back, you breathed through your nose and released the bubbling frustration in your chest. You won’t have to see him anymore if you tried your best to avoid him. 

-

And try your best you did, but the universe had different plans because the next rehearsal, you were beyond confused to see him sat on the backstage floor. 

His hair was messily tied in a low bun, brushes and open cans of paint rested beside him as he applied the color on the base of the cardboard tower. The thin strings of his ripped jeans digging in the flesh of his knee while his legs were crossed. 

“What are you doing here?” 

“Painting?” He shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“I’m not blind.” You put your bag on the props table. “I meant why are you doing this?” 

You haven’t been here for longer than five minutes and he was already sick of the questions. 

He sighed dramatically. “Cooper and I made a deal. I help out in this and we get the AV room. We need an actual venue for our events, you know, those with purpose.” Each word matched with his painting strokes and bobs of his head. 

“You mean playing your silly little board game?” 

And he looked at you like you lit his house on fire. “I wouldn’t expect you to understand, snobby little miss perfect.” He said, puffing out air on the ‘p’. 

“I’m not snobby.” You bit back. 

“Yeah, sure.” He adjusted his position and stretched his legs with a groan, pressing on his exposed knees. 

You were about to give him a piece of your mind but the door loudly snapped open and out came Mr. Cooper. 

“Y/N. Good thing you’re here.” 

On instinct, you and Eddie exchanged confused looks. 

Mr. Cooper went closer to you and rested his arm on the piano stocked near the curtains. “Liam unfortunately won’t make it to the show. His mother called and apparently, he fractured a few bones from a bad fall and is bed ridden for the next few weeks.” 

“Now, the problem is,” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “not many people auditioned and all of those who did already have their parts.” 

He finally looked at you with a defeated expression. “We don’t have a prince.”

You stood in silence, not knowing what to say. But Eddie didn’t hesitate to hide his laughter, coming out as a chortle while his shoulder shook. 

“Anything funny, Mr. Munson?” 

Eddie just continued to laugh, shaking his head. “You should be happy he won’t make it. Your little play would perform better with a choking frog, trust me.” 

Silence hung in the air once more but you were startled when your teacher shouted. “Yes!” 

He started mumbling as he stepped closer to Eddie, picking at a few loose strands of hair, looking at the exposed tattoos and spreading his hands over the width of Eddie’s broad back. 

Confused, you turned to him and he looked at you with bulbs in his eyes. 

“We’ve found our prince!” He pointed at Eddie who was now frozen in place. 

-

Eddie fumbled with his script. He wanted to hurl at every cheesy line and every predictable plot twist. Writing his own stories for the campaigns, he’d developed a strong sense of what’s good and bad when it comes to writing an engaging story. This script is not it and he didn’t hesitate sharing his sentiments with you.

“This story is like hundreds of years old, right?” He trailed the thin ledge of the stage, one arm stretched out for balance and the other holding the script in front of him. 

You stood, arms crossed and trying to block his voice from your mind as you tried to memorise the lines. 

“I think it would be so metal if the prince actually turned into the villain and just cursed everybody and he lived happily ever after.” He looked at you proudly. “Much better, right?”

You shut your eyes tight. “The villain is a witch but with that hair, I think you suit that role better.”

“I’d love to break the fairytale norms,” he clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “but I think letting that kiss pass would be a big loss for you and I, as the knight in shining armour, am much too gentlemanly to disappoint you.” He bowed dramatically in front of you.

“What kiss?”

“Oh princess,” He mocked a pout. “don’t act dumb. You’ve probably been dreaming of this moment.”

Then he left you scrambling through your script looking for the part where you’re supposedly going to kiss.

You can’t even say it. You can’t even think it. It’s unthinkable.  You would’ve marched down to Mr. Cooper if not for the shiny reflection of his balding head as he repeated the line over and over to a student until even you had memorised it from afar. 

You’d just have to suck it up because you’ve kissed Dean Williams before and he was like Tom Cruise with slightly crooked teeth.

This was Eddie. Should be a piece of cake and if anything, he should be the one feeling the pressure of that kiss with you. That’s right. He should be shaking in his boots.

But for the next few weeks, Eddie did not miss a chance to torment you. Making smacking noises with puckered lips when he passes you in the hallway, blowing kisses across the cafeteria or even just wiggling his eyebrows whenever he’d catch your eyes. 

Rehearsals were easy enough, already mastering the ways to tolerate Eddie and his teasing.

It’s just an act, you reminded yourself when he touches you tenderly and talks in a sweet voice, eyes gentler than anything you’ve ever seen. His doe eyes that makes you want to hurl in butterflies. When he offers a hand and you take it, he’d pull it towards him. He holds you close by the waist, occasionally giving it a light squeeze. Oh, and when he pours all his attention to you when it’s your turn to speak.

It’s just an act. It’s just an act. It’s just an act. 

“Now, kiss!” The other kids let out a couple of low ‘oooh’s and a few wolf whistles which Mr. Cooper had to shut down right away when your face scrunched in pain and you held your jaw, hissing exaggeratedly. You look over to Eddie who had a knowing grin plastered on his smug face. 

“Okay, we can skip the kissing for today.” You felt guilty for making him concerned and worried. “Just do it on the actual shows, yeah? It’s just a kiss, it should be natural and unrehearsed.” 

But he couldn’t have been more wrong. It wasn’t just a kiss when the lights dimmed behind the curtains, the audience chatter died down and it was almost time to go your marker. 

Closing your eyes and breathing in deep, you tried to calm your nerves and dry your sweaty palms. Countless school productions and this is the first time you’d ever felt this way. 

You almost jumped out of your skin when you felt cold fingers touch your exposed shoulder. 

“Hey, hey. It’s me.” Despite the dim surroundings, his eyes sparkled under the subtle lights. “I just wanted to wish you good luck. Are you okay?”

Your stiff shoulders relaxed and you shook your head. “I can’t do this.”

His brows furrowed and he held you by the arms. “You can do this. You’ve come so far, princess.”

And you waited for a joke or a punch line but it never came. The other days, he decided that he was going to call you princess to ‘embody your role fully as a royal pain’. But just then, there was no hint of mockery in the way he called you princess. 

The way it rolled off his tongue was as if it would be written in big, loopy cursive writing. Maybe written with crisp black ink and a heart at the dot of the ‘i’. Princess. Eddie’s Princess. 

Stupid brown eyes! Your mind chanted when your eyes came to contact with his and for a spilt second, you forgot about your situation. It was just you dressed in a whimsical dress and him adorned with plastic chain armour. His hair was in a neater bun and your mind buffered to realise who’s the real princess. 

“You’re pretty.” Your mouth blurted, uncontrolled and a separate entity than the rest of you. You haven’t any alcohol in you but you were definitely drinking this memory away. 

You thought he was going to make fun of your sudden compliment. Eddie stiffened for a second but smiled like you’ve never seen before. “Thanks but you’re the pretty one.” He trailed a finger on your cheek. 

“I’ve been in so many shows, I don’t know what’s happening to me.” You breathed out, voice soft and shallow, ducking your head to hide your flustered cheeks.

He looked down at your lips and licked his own. “I think I know what it is.”

“Actors, ready on cue. We’re on in three.” 

You looked at him with questioning eyes and he cupped your cheek. 

“Is it the kiss?” He whispered like it was a forbidden word. You’ve heard him say far more inappropriate words louder than that before. “We don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. Nobody else knows it’s in the script anyway. Just us.”

“And Mr. Cooper.” He rolled his eyes.

Suddenly, Eddie was a whole other person. Gone is the man who would embarrass you in the hallways, earning hoots from the varsity team and his own group at the cafeteria table. At that moment, he was completely gentle and all caring. 

You stood still, not moving an inch while your face was in his hands. His rings were cold against your skin and you need warmth.

Maybe it was the fact that you knew you’d have to do it anyway or the fact that he was totally and completely breath-taking in his costume and the way his hands were so gentle on your face. Whatever it was, it drove you mad and you had to act on it now.

“We’re on in one.”

“Kiss me.” You closed your eyes.

If Mr. Cooper was right about something, it was that a kiss should feel natural. Nothing forced, faked and rehearsed. 

Without a pause, he closed the distance between you two. At first, it was like touching the clouds. His lips were soft and cool against yours, the scent of mint unable to mask the smell of tobacco off his breath but you didn’t mind it. Because when he gently bit your lower lip, you let him in and all thoughts and inhibitions melted like butter. or ice. or whatever things melted because analogies and metaphors didn’t matter when it just felt so good to be held by him. 

You pulled away, cheeks warm and heart pounding in your chest. 

From out of nowhere, he pulls out a soft pink petaled flower and tucked in behind your ear

“Actors in position, we’re on in 10…” The stage manager counted down.

You swallowed the hesitation and said, “Break a leg.” before walking away to your marker. 

“I’d really like to still be mobile after this.” He joked but you didn’t hear him over the pounding of your heart. 

I clearly have never been in a school production because one, my high school sucked and number two… my high school sucked. Yes, this is a repost (as usual).

[taags-old-account]

I posted 22,731 times in 2022

That's 2,656 more posts than 2021!

285 posts created (1%)

22,446 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@kydrakinetic

@draal-the-deadly

@theminecraftbee

@talesofarcadiaforever

@pacificwaternymph

I tagged 3,073 of my posts in 2022

#the arson human talks shit - 130 posts

#favourite - 126 posts

#ask game - 116 posts

#ask games - 116 posts

#thanks for the ask! - 74 posts

#gods and hunters - 47 posts

#writing tips - 43 posts

#tales of arcadia - 38 posts

#yes - 32 posts

#:) - 31 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#'don't let her see your power in the daylight' could be a reference to the trollhunter amulet and sword of daylight and how jim needs to hi

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Sometimes a family isn't a mom, dad, 2.5 children, and a white picket fence. Sometimes it's:

- A near 1000 year old punk wizard boy who needs a hug.

- A very sarcastic talking cat with poor eyesight.

- A plant goddess.

- An Akaridion warrior queen.

- Her little brother, who gives off pure aroace vibes and can build a mind reader in 2 hours.

- A short gremlin king with a very large conspiracy board.

- A dude who's a fan of hard rock, and has a warhammer.

- A very sassy blue child who needs 10 years of therapy.

- The troll history teacher that tried to kill the sassy blue child 10x over. He's also dating the sassy blue child's mother. Troll dad #2 of sassy blue child.

- The Mother Of The Sassy Blue child. Who for some reason didn't think that something was seriously up with her kid. (Plot Armour.)

- A guy who was there for comedy relief, but somehow got a bully redemption arc.

- Purple punk child who got posessed by former evil sorcerer lady once.

- Troll dad #1 of sassy blue child, he likes reading and burning books.

- A Troll covered in moss, he's the wingman and a former pacifist.

- Former evil sorcerer lady with a similar aesthetic to a Marvel Norse God, but actually had a point.

- Adoptive dad of punk wizard boy. Who says he doesn't care that much. But he cares A LOT.

279 notes - Posted January 5, 2022

#4

It's time for some Empires Propaganda...

Come watch Empires SMP Season 2! We have the following:

A little scrunkly goblin man who lives in caves and likes pickles and scams

A catwoman that actively commits crimes against humanity A totally normal human. Yep absolutely a human

A Princess in a pretty pink tutu that will fight entire monster armies (it's secret though hush)

The Sheriff who's definitely not a toy

The witch that got expelled from the academy for destroying reality as we know it

The Dungeon Master who keeps his dubious amounts of smooth stone inside a tomb

A 5ft 11ft god complex personified whose obsessions include dirty jokes, gold, and the word 'Lore'

A reality traveler who decides that trusting nobody and stealing clothes off of corpses is the best chance at survival

The self-appointed princess who decides to trust the little blue lights leading her into the dark cave is a smart idea to get a kingdom banner.

The hardwood seller, whose adoptive father is part rabbit and whose idea of father-son bonding is animal slaughter

Heterochromia but through nefarious skull means. And he's not straight

Pirate who asks nicely first before stealing any of your belongings

The one-night stand of a child who consistently has to deal with both of his 'daddy's' excessively worse-by-day dirty jokes

286 notes - Posted August 2, 2022

#3

"If your wondering why I use he/him pronouns for the allays, I just think of them as himbos"

Thanks, Pixl for this new mental image /pos

289 notes - Posted August 4, 2022

#2

Despite TOA being done, I am creating propaganda...

Come Watch Tales Of Arcadia! We Have The Following:

A magic amulet, which gives you really cool silver armour and a death sentence!

Cheeky Wizards x4

Murder board created by a small teen who has the ability to 'Tokyo Drift' a car

A literal hacker/Queen of an entire planet

Crispy

Jim Lake Jr, one of the best animated TV protags I've ever seen.

A hellfire of a movie

Magic Siblings :)

A dog who pisses explosions

MMMMMMMM GLORY

*enters Janus Order* *two aliens are playing techno music* *bones are everywhere* TEEN CENTER!!!!!

Getting possessed by eldritch wizards intent on destroying the world is completely normal.... IT'S FINE.

Strangely specific threats.

Really cool CGI animation.

"bUT A GnoMe IN A DOLLHOUSE??"

an insane amount of AUs

Haha what is this sadness? Why is everyone dying? *Play's STARSET's Unbecoming*

I suggest looking up the definition of 'Moppet'

The entirety of the word 'Buttsnack' being used so casually

"SHUT UP STEVE"

The Goblin Revolution

Jim Lake Jr, one second being the definition of a sweetheart. Two minutes later, "Hey Strickler. *spits in his mouth*"

The Breakfast Reckless Club

Steve's screams.

Troll Jim.

Toby being the bestest friend you could ever ask for

The murder of a highschool principal.

Assassins and Bounty Hunters galore.

See the full post

346 notes - Posted February 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

The defining traits of humanity are NOT sex, romance, and empathy.

The defining traits of humanity are our creativity, adaptability, and our boundless amounts of hubris.

As well as arson.

1,730 notes - Posted June 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[sleepymarmot]

I have finally beaten the first boss of Scrivener's Hall solo! And finished the dungeon with the help of others.

A day or two ago he killed me many times. After improving my build a bit, I returned. My many attempts at killing him with a two bar Pale Order build were unsuccessful. At first I tried to do the mechanics, but it was too hard to keep track of where the books were shooting their lights, so I was overwhelmed. Then I tried to burn him down, but got swarmed by the mechanics. But I was improving: last time I kept dying around 70-80%, maybe 50-60%, and now my best attempts were around 30-40%. A big help was that early in the fight today I finally figured out I should swap Azandar from tank to healer, and he went from dying within the first thirty seconds to staying alive throughout the entire fight.

Then I realized that 1) in the middle of the fight I was neglecting the back bar because I had no time to swap; 2) I could really use a bonus to stamina and magicka recovery. So I changed to my solo Oakensoul build, edited it a bit... And managed to defeat the boss on first try!

Here's what we were using:

(Me: Chakram of Destiny; Pragmatic Fatecarver; Cephaliarch's Flail; Inspired Scholarship; Spiteward of the Lucid Mind; Sanctum of the Abyssal Sea. Azandar: Abor's Augmented Ward; Triptych Physic; Ritual of Salvation; Shields of Erudition; Crimson Font)

Unfortunately, that was not nearly enough for the second boss. I could survive the poison vomit once or twice in a row, but that only got me to around 80%. I tried several times, but it was obviously hopeless with the gear and skills I currently have. So I had to call for help in the group finder, and I had a full team in approximately 5-10 minutes and cleared the rest of the dungeon in the blink of an eye.

This was actually my second completion of the dungeon; earlier the same day I asked in group finder to run it in "story mode", but the team who assembled ran through the dungeon pretty fast and also didn't hunt the scamps, and I didn't feel comfortable stopping to admire the scenery or ask them how the scamps work. So I was unsatisfied with that as Jarcanist's one canonical chance at this quest, and returned to try again solo — and that's how I ended up spending approximately two more hours on a single clear.

I have to say: going through the dungeon alone and discovering it for yourself is significantly more fun than blindly running after strangers from the queue who already know everything. It feels like a real adventure! I wish this way of doing dungeons were more accessible — I'm not even talking about the kind of story mode in which every enemy dies from a light tap on the shoulder, but something that might pose a challenge, but still a challenge that is solvable without having extremely specific gear and skills at hand. Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful to the people who come to my rescue, and playing with other humans is its own kind of fun, but I wish it were an option instead of a necessity.

And now, I'm going to run it a bunch of times again. Need that Velothi lead asap! So far I've killed only one scamp (during that solo run), and of course wasn't lucky enough to get the lead in the very first chest. Oh, and give me those sweet, super expensive Glass Eyes of Mora too.

Btw: shout out to this video of the dungeon's full content that I used as one of the guides.

After this, doing the Runemaster Xiomara boss in Apocrypha even one competent partner, let alone with a group, is pleasantly familiar! I visited him on a whim, just to check how the boss feels after beating his dungeon equivalent, and ended up in a group in which we quickly did a Bastion Nymic and two other bosses I needed for the Defender of Necrom achievement. Did the Runemaster three times, and still no lead...

As you can see from the long post, this was all pretty exciting! I'd been looking forward to this dungeon for the entire year, it's relevant to the character I'm playing, has cool design, and rewards I'm interested in — so I'm happy to finally get around to doing it.

[cinnamonest]

Misogyny/Sexism kink HCs/Fem darling HCs

This specifically is from a very long while back but, I’ve gotten a lot of similar asks over time for HCs for the kink for different characters. I started this post ages, forgot about it, and was going through my drafts and realized I never completed this one, so I went ahead and finished the unfinished ones and added newer characters too.

You ever make  something and then look at it like... huh, I really made this atrocity exist didn't I... I am responsible for these words... I will face judgement for them one day. I will answer to God for what I've created with no excuse for the sin I've wrought into the world. Neat!

This turned out to be more like gender-based HCs in general and attitudes towards fem darling but they're still awful and toxic and all those other wonderful things❤️ I made the more pleasant ones a bit shorter and the more awful they get the longer the entries get. But this all revolves around the kink in general. In case this, God forbid, somehow ends up searchable despite being untagged, and since this is probably the most sensitive kink I write for, just a reminder/warning to those that stumble onto this/aren't into it: this is entirely fiction. I don't believe or promote any of the values, beliefs, or practices mentioned here.

//misogyny (like seriously, that is the focus of this post, this is bad, you have been warned), noncon, lots of correlations between sex and physical identifiers/traits, yandere/noncon/kidnapping mentions, super toxic behaviors, mentions of cheating (from third parties/cheating fears regarding darling, not from the boys), pressuring/guilting into sex, psychological complexes for Albedo & Scara, pseudoscience, mentions of PMS/periods, victim blaming, gaslighting, manipulation, abusive tendencies, forced impreg/breeding

//also a LOT of slutshaming, since that's a core element of the kink, so be warned there's also a lot of discussion of a slut!darling with high promiscuity.

Under a cut for length (and to preserve what little sense of dignity I have left).

--------------

     Bennett, Gorou, Thoma, and Chongyun do the same thing where they're like. Over the top on making sure they're doing things the 'right way,' traditionally speaking. Like will accidentally trip you and knock stuff over bc they're in a rush to get to the door to hold it for you before you reach it. That sort of thing. Noooo don't try to pay for anything!! You're not supposed to do that!! Don't carry anything heavy, they're supposed to get it for you!! It's kinda sweet until it becomes obnoxious... like sir, I can perform basic tasks for myself please stop trying to help me.

They're the type to get mad at another guy for saying something bad and try to defend you. "All women are queens" type of boys, but so far it goes in the opposite direction and becomes almost demeaning because of the uncomfortable pedestal they put you on. Truly little white knights, bless them. They want to be respectful to the best of their ability.

-

Bennett goes heavier on the "noooo let me do that" thing. Poor adventuring partner. What CAN you do? He says he has to go into the dungeon first, it could be dangerous! No don't open the chest what if something jumps out at you? Let him fight the enemy, you just stand back, don't worry, he'll take care of it! You're just too fragile to have to do any of that stuff yourself, he could never sit back and let you do it, that would be wrong of him! What, let you make the FIRE? You could get burned! Besides, he can do it so much easier, vision and all.

This can backfire, very easily, because it's... him. No, let him carry the big heavy box, he could never just sit back and make you do that! Except that when he takes it out of your hands, he trips and breaks the entire thing. He insists on lighting the fire, only for it to start to rain in the process. He opens the chests, but they're always near-empty. But no matter how many times this continues to backfire, he will never stop insisting on doing things himself. He wants to feel useful! Is that really so bad? You'd break his heart if you ever pointed it out... like, he's aware of it nonetheless, but hearing you say it out loud forces him to come to terms with it.

 Also, keep in mind he's getting all his dating advice from his elderly dads. They're teaching him to do stuff that was normal decades ago, so expect a lot of overly-chivalrous behaviors, which he will rush to perform like his life depends on being able to hold that door for you, or give you his jackets and coats if it's cold, that sort of thing. To the point it honestly gets annoying, bless his heart, but given his sweet nature, you try to swallow the irritation at first, can't bring yourself to be mad... but that only encourages him.

 -

 Thoma in particular pedestalizes girls as a whole. He is that boy that thinks you're super capable, you can do anything a guy can do... and he feels the need to... remind you of that, all the time. You all know the type. Almost as if he wants to be recognized for being "good," wants his 'brownie points'... although realistically, he's looking for a more physical reward.

 Yes, that being said... our boy is down bad, he desperately needs his balls drained and will shamelessly try to obtain it. Thus, he also tends to have the sort of "being nice -> pussy" mentality, where he feels like if he just does enough nice things, eventually he'll get to put his dick in you. So much so that he goes overboard, makes you uncomfortable with the sheer number of gifts and acts of service being given to/done for you. The more desperate he gets, the more he lays on the "niceness," but it becomes very obvious very quickly exactly what he's so nice for. Not that he's consciously thinking so, he really, genuinely does also just naturally want to make you happy, but it would be a lie to say there isn't a significant portion of his brain being controlled directly by his dick. But he does everything with respect! He breaks into your room (respectfully), spies on you changing or showering (respectfully), takes every opportunity to let you go in front of him up stairs out of chivalry and respect, and may just take the opportunity to get a glance upward if you're wearing a skirt/dress (respectfully), drugs your drinks and food so you pass out and he can finally put his dick in you (respectfully!)... you get the idea.

 So yes, he's one of those guys that takes pride in being good. Granted, he's still a very humble person overall, but sometimes he seems to be a little too eager to remind you how much he respects you and is super chivalrous to you... like, almost as if he's not-so-subtly begging for something in return, which doesn't take a genius to figure out what that might be. I mean, in his mind, he's followed all the right steps, this is totally the part where you practically leap into his bed right?? If not, he keeps trying for a while... over and over. But to be honest, if it goes on long enough, he can get frustrated. Like, not that you don't totally have autonomy and all that, no, he'd never be entitled or anything like that! It's just that... since he's done so many nice things for you, it does kinda logically follow that he deserves something for it, don't you think? Not that he's saying you have to do anything for him! No, no, it's not like that at all. You don't have to do anything... it would just be really nice, you know, since he has done so much for you... no pressure.

 -

 To be fair, yin energy is associated with femininity, so, perhaps Chongyun reasons that in order to offset his yang energy issues, he needs a constant supply of it... logical thought process says he needs a sweet girl to have attached at the hip, to carry around like a good luck charm! So uh... he respects the independent girls and all, but maybe you, specifically, would be really well suited to a wifey life of doing nothing but being his and staying by his side all the time. You can help him with small tasks in his work, and calming him down when he gets too overwhelmed and hot! That's, um... empowering. Yeah, he also tends to take the route of "all girls should be free and empowered but here is my 1000-slide presentation on why darling is the exception--" you get the idea.

 Chongyun also white knights. So badly. It's embarrassing. He will unhesitatingly rush to your defense the moment another guy says something that could vaguely be interpreted as mean because he has to. He can't just let someone get away with disrespect! ...Even if you're practically begging him to leave it alone. He has to defend you, after all, not doing so would... well, it would look kinda pathetic, he can't have that. This is also true if darling is a stranger. Like, he white knights in general, because he's not about to let anyone be mean to girls on his watch!! He will definitely walk right up to some guy with an irritated glare to ask what they're doing to you, ask you if you're okay, fight them off if need be. It's only the right thing to do, he thinks.

 And finally, the whole yin energy thing... well, it has to be transferred to his body somehow. And he's been told the best way is intercourse. So, really, it is a very dire matter when he needs to bend you over the nearest surface, or push you up against a tree or the like. He respects you a lot and all that, but, uh, this is a very serious situation, you see, so maybe you can sacrifice that free will just this once for the greater good.

 -

 As for Gorou... well, he tries, but the issue is that sometimes biology takes over. Like, yes, he respects your right to your autonomy and freedom however-- it's... just that you told him you're not ready for it yet, but you see, he really really wants to breed you... so there is a conflict of interest here. Not that he doesn't respect you! But it's just that... he really wants it. So he may have to kinda set the respect to the side just long enough to shove his knot in you, then he'll go right back to being very respectful, promise, so it all works out right? He'll even apologize the whole time he's pounding his hips into you, that's how much he respects you.

 And he will help you take care of them, of course. But, uh, it may be something of a permanent occupation. He would never think that you're not good for anything else, of course, it's just that once you've recovered, he's definitely ready to stuff you again... and again... and due to his naturally very high doggie fertility, it usually only takes one try before he gets results. He thinks you'll be really good at the whole incubator-breeder thing. Not that you aren't a great fighter and all that too! But, well, technically since you have the parts, it's not too upsetting to say you were built for it, right?

 Likewise, he can't help but be defensive, protective. Not that he thinks you can't do it yourself! No, never, he just... gets really upset all of a sudden when other men talk to you. He doesn't really think about it, his ears just flatten to the side of his head and he growls out of instinct. Trust him, he's embarrassed by it himself, he just can't even think straight when that happens. He has to protect you, you know, you're his, so... oh, no, not... not like he thinks of you as property or anything! He just thinks of you as something that is just for him and no one else and that he has more of a claim to you than others, which is totally different.

  -----

Venti's issue is not really his attitudes or opinions or anything, he doesn't really have any that are too bad, and more his behaviors and the fact that every little thing he does to darling more or less all revolves around him being perpetually and insatiably horny.

 He has lots of respect for you as a female and your autonomy and all that... or so he says... but his actions tend to not quite line up with that because he's a nasty little perv with no regard for privacy or decency. He honestly thinks he's very respectful, if you were to ask him, because he doesn't realize that his habits of groping and voyeurism are in any way bad.

 Venti would be like one of those guys all for fair treatment and rights and all because they know that sexual liberation means they'll get laid more often, but still keep some sexist attitudes when it benefits them. Sexual autonomy significantly increases his chance of darling sleeping with him, does it not? In that case, well, it is the City of freedom! Honestly, that's probably part of the origin of the whole city of freedom thing, he probably decided Mondstadt should be a place where people are free to sleep with whomever whenever. ...Well, unless it's darling of course, darling should only be sleeping with him, darling just has the freedom to do so whenever she wants. Come on now, all rules (or lack thereof) have exceptions.

 But unlike the former four, don't except any shame or respect in terms of opportunities. He's shameless, and will take every chance he gets to get an eyeful, handful, or faceful of you. He already is a little perv and menace even before darling enters his life. Flipping up skirts with wind powers, spying on the nuns through the cathedral windows when they bathe or get dressed, copping a feel when he "trips" right into some tits. Unfortunately, once darling comes along into his life, he redirects all that perversion that was once spread across the entire female population of Mondstadt, onto one person.

 It's important to note that he uses his cute, somewhat effeminate appearances to get out of any real consequences -- over time, he's learned he can get away with it like that, so he has no shame and no hesitancy. He's not like those gross guys (who are, you know, tall, bearded, gruff-looking, everything he's not) in bars that grope and say gross things and get rightfully slapped or have drinks thrown at them, no, he can just flash a sweet smile and he's used to being forgiven for anything. He's not a big or intimidating guy, so most women he's ever interacted with or bumped into just roll their eyes or even find his behaviors a bit cute, ruffle his hair a bit and leave him alone. Should darling actually get mad about it, he can just get watery-eyed and let his head fall a bit... sorry... He didn't mean anything bad... you'll forgive him right...?

 That being said, it backfires against him. He enjoys using his youthful appearance to get his out of the consequences of his actions, but is taken aback when you consequently actually try to treat him like a teen boy or something. You should know he's way older than that, why are you talking to him like he's a kid, talking down to him as if he's stupid or naive? Or, gods forbid, you hit him with the 'you're like a little brother to me!' line, that would basically gut his heart out of his body. It starts to give him a bit of a masculinity crisis. Do you not take him seriously because he's short and slender? Do you not see him as A Man™?? Does he need to be taller? More muscular? It starts to get to his head. He has to try to make up for it. He'll start trying to be more impressive, trying to perform feats of strength and/or competency and make sure darling is watching.

 If all else fails, he can spring the revelation he's been planning for a while on you. After all, you'll totally respect him and fall for him if he has power, right? He's seen a lot of women that go for men with a lot of power. So revealing his archon status is a good step towards that. You probably wanna worship him now, right?? He will gladly accept, in fact, he has several highly suggested forms of worship that would be especially appreciated, if you'll hear him out...

 But in general, he can and will get very very pushy if he's still not reaching the goal. Oh, you're waiting for the right person or marriage or something? Something about purity or chastity? Well, you know, if it's with a god, it basically cancels out and makes you extra pure. You're worried about judgement? Don't worry, he'll never judge you (as long as the person you're sleeping with is him and not someone else, of course, in which case maybe you should just be judged for your taste in guys). He just pushes and pushes and talks his way out of every excuse you can give. He will stop at absolutely nothing, will go to any lengths, just to bust a nut in you. Please. What more do you want?

 In the end, he actually has very little respect for your autonomy and will, if it's what he doesn't like. His respect is a bit performative, and only lasts as long as he's under the impression that he's getting closer to his goal. Then he starts to test boundaries. You say you don't like touches, but certainly if he just keeps doing it, you'll get used to it. And again, he can always get out of your anger by putting on a cute face, no? That's the issue with that whole thing -- he's so used to it that he uses it as a default excuse to do bad things in the first place, the security of having that to fall back on makes him much more bold and willing to violate little boundaries until he can work his way in.

 Also, that whole "City of Freedom" thing backfires likewise if he realizes darling has been... taking advantage of that. Mondstadt's favorite bar maid or nun or whatever you are has a favorite pastime, and it's sleeping around? The horror. He's... conflicted... this is technically what he envisioned for this city, a place people could do whatever they wanted, but... but...!!! Darling's choices are bad for her, right? Maybe he can uh... appear to one of the nuns in a "vision" (think like he did with Stanley), pass on the divine message that they've had it wrong this whole time and promiscuity is actually like super duper bad. You can only sleep around as uh, acts of charity... for people in freelance occupations, such as bards, for example.

 ------

 Razor also has the best intentions, but it's... less wholesome than some of the ones above. It's just... he sees everything very naturalistically, very black and white. Definitely thinks of things in terms of "nature" being right because it's all he knows, so... Strength is the be-all-end-all determiner of position in his world. That's why pack leaders and the like exist, they fight for it. Why would you think you two are the same? You're clearly weaker. Your protests don't make sense. Do you not know? Here, he'll show you, see, he can pick you up and pin you down and you can't do either of those things to him because you're weak. Very weak! (He has been working on use of simple adverbs like that, please be proud of him...). So, now you understand why you're supposed to do what he wants right? What? What do you mean that doesn't matter? What else would you base these things on?? What are these "rights" and "free will" you keep going on about, and... "au-to-no-mee...?" You're just confusing him now.

 In all seriousness, with most gender-related things altogether, he just has absolutely no idea what you're talking about. This is especially true the more complex you're getting. He understands... that females are weak, and males are strong. That's... about the limit of his understanding. Anything beyond that is just met with a blank stare. He has no concept of things like autonomy, stereotypes, prejudices, anything of the sort. The only "right" he's familiar with is the opposite of "left" (and he gets which word is which direction confused sometimes). Nothing socially complex. Which, if you ask him, he knows all he needs to know. It sounds like these words you keep using are just things that only apply to humans that live with other humans in big cities and stuff, so it's pointless to talk about it when you live out here with him.

 This makes him somewhat frustrating to deal with, because he literally cannot be reasoned with. With our other boys, even if they staunchly disagree with you, see you as inferior, etc, you can still argue with them about it, still have back-and-forth dialogue, they still understand what you mean when you argue that you have the right to be free and do what you want, or when you accuse them of being prejudiced, even if they dismiss the idea. There's a catharsis in merely arguing and at least being heard, knowing the other person understands the meaning of your words. But that's not the case with Razor. You cannot have a discussion when he doesn't understand the very concepts in the first place, and this makes conversation on the matter impossible. Something about being trapped with someone on whom logic is lost, where your very valid points fall on deaf ears, is infuriating, as you quickly discover. It's like talking to a brick wall, except the brick wall may actually have him beat by a few IQ points.

 So, while he doesn't understand any of that stuff you go on about, he has another pressing concern, much more important than whatever you're talking about. You must have lots of puppies, and every second you spend not knocked up is wasted time in that regard. That's like the whole purpose of your life, right? That's the purpose of all life, to be fair, he thinks, either making puppies or having them, and he can get all the food you need and bring it back, and protect you from enemies! You just have to take care of the puppies. This is a good setup. It works for the wolves, after all.

 But back to general issues, or lack thereof, he doesn't really understand the concept of sexes to begin with outside of very obvious physical traits (he can distinguish a little bit, but only general traits that are not always accurate -- taller versus shorter, high voice and low voice, curved and not curved, and that's about it), and his vague, very limited understanding of social norms, so on the bright side you'll actually be free from some of the cultural expectations of women. He doesn't really care if you curse a lot or what kind of language/speech you use (as long as he can understand it, no big confusing words please), you won't be held to any standards of appearances, nor of "appropriateness" or "ladylikeness." It's a breath of fresh air compared to some of the others in that regard.

 He's just a little taken aback and confused when you don't want to cooperate with him, or more importantly, mate with him. He's never seen anything different... the males go hunt food and defend the pack from enemies, and the females mate with them and have the pups and nurse them and... that's how things go. He's just very confused by it all. Unfortunately, he has pretty limited patience and no real desire to understand, so ultimately he just gets frustrated and will force whatever he wants.

 Whenever you're still in the non-kidnapped stage, you really get a taste of that mating competition thing someone once told you about wolves. Again, he knows no better, he has no reason to think the humans operate any differently than what he's used to. Our boy is unnecessarily and instantly aggressive towards other men, glaring and even audibly growling just over the offense of them coming up to speak to you. It's rather embarrassing, really, since it's so obvious what he's trying to do and why. He stands super close to you, tries to physically stand in between you and other men. They keep coming up to you, no matter how many times he rubs your faces together and licks you to get his scent on you! Normally that is a clear warning sign between wolves that you're taken, but it seems the humans ignore it entirely, and it leaves him feeling uncertain of what else he can do... so he just becomes more protective and vigilant. God forbid another man were to touch you, because he takes that as a direct challenge, trying to steal you. Well, if they want to steal you away, they have to fight to the death first, which he's very willing to do at a moment's notice, not even the slightest hesitation.

 Finally, he also has no concept of chastity or promiscuity and won't ever think to ask if you've had other partners before, as wolves mate for life... but still, it's wise not to mention if you have. It... makes him feel something bad that he doesn't like. A bad feeling in his chest and stomach. He doesn't like thinking about it. He didn't even get to fight them! Is that why you're so difficult? Maybe he just needs to fight that other guy and kill him, then you'd like him a lot more once you know he's stronger... maybe that is the issue, that's why you're not being a very good mate, because he hasn't proven he's the strongest yet. Well, if you tell him where they live, he can bring the body back to you so you can see... but for some reason, you refuse to tell him.

 Also, thankfully, he doesn't use intellect against you, like some people might claim to be inherently smarter than you and thereby superior. He doesn't factor intelligence into his way of thinking at all, for, ah, obvious reasons.

  ------

I already mentioned Xingqiu being a sexist rich boy before (here) but like. Ugh. He is the most entitled little brat sometimes, underneath his generally pleasant demeanor -- it's more like he maintains that general niceness up until he stops getting his way.

 He feels like he can just buy you over because... girls like pretty things right? He sees it as a formula, you buy a certain amount of shiny, pretty materialistic things, keep giving them as gifts, and boom, you have a wife. What, what do you mean girls are each unique human beings with discernment and individual tastes?? They care about things other than just money and buying stuff? Well, then it becomes passive-aggressive commentary (read: not-so-subtle whining) about you being "complicated," why is there no easy formula to follow to win you over? After all, he has a very simple way to win him over, just be nice and obedient and worship him. How unfair.

 He's definitely used to a home environment where his mom was kinda a trophy wife, she's super submissive and obedient and does whatever his dad wants, and he expects the same from his cute little wife too. And of course, his mom always dresses very revealingly and sits in father's lap whenever he's meeting with business partners like a cute trophy to show off... and again, he expects the same. He's got this image in his head of how things will go, a sort of fantasy he's too naive to realize might not go as smoothly as he thinks, so he's genuinely baffled when you start off resistant. How unexpected. Maybe you just need to get used to being here? Maybe you're hormonal? Maybe he did something to make you mad and he needs to buy you something or do something to get you to settle down? Who knows what the issue could be.

 After all, he truly believes that the state of the women he's used to seeing -- submissive, quiet eye-candy wives that are extremely docile, agreeable, and happy all the time -- is the default state of girls. That's what they're naturally like, anything else is a disruption of their normal state that can be remedied. He is entirely unaware of, and has never considered, the possibility that maybe, just maybe, those women are sacrificing the freedom to speak their mind and behave the way they want in order to have a super rich husband... it really has never occurred to him.

 And if you tell him such, that you have your own thoughts and desires that don't revolve around what he wants, that the women he's used to seeing are only behaving the way they do for the benefits of their marriages, it leaves him somewhat shocked. Because, well, that does make sense, but it's just something incomprehensible. He reaches his own conclusion... perhaps, just maybe, he might be willing to accept that women are unique individual human beings, and not a monolith, as he previously believed. This is a big transition in his way of thinking, he'll have you know. In which case, you're still wrong about them -- that's how they are, all docile and sweet, you're just different. However, it does stand to reason, that you can be converted into being more like them. People are subject to change. So really, you end up back where you started, with him believing you just have to be won over with some set of actions that will eventually cause you to become the ideal he wants.

 He perpetuates the sort of system you're subjected to by participating in it -- his family more or less buys you by persuading your own family to give you over for a massive sum. Regardless of your background, the brat practically begged his father into securing you for him, which, if you weren't of an equally wealthy family, was quite the struggle to convince him, so hey, he's already put a lot of effort in you know? To be honest, the thought of you refusing doesn't really cross his mind... that's not how these things work. Even if you do, of course, getting your family to write such, his father just shields him from finding out about that rejection, and instead sends a second offer to your family... with a new, higher sum they can't bring themselves to refuse.

 And from the moment he... obtains you, he wants to show you off like a trophy, following that same example of what he's seen the men in wealthy social circles do, what he's observed his whole life. In the world of the elite, when you have something that makes other people envy you, when you have something shiny and new and want people to be jealous of it, you put it on display. Besides, it's sort of a masculinity thing with those types as well, the need to have a female on display as if to show off that look, this is mine. So he does -- puts you in clothes that make you uncomfortable, drags you everywhere with a firm grip and a smile, gets you to sit pressed up against him or on his lap when he meets with others. Also, rich people fancy clothing is heavy and uncomfortable, ugh. You never realized until now how many layers and unnecessary little pieces there are to this stuff.

 And what's much, much worse, is that you will be held to certain standards among his culture and class. He sneakily elbows you in the side when he introduces you to his friends as a quick reminder, because you were looking them in the eye when you're supposed to look at the ground when you speak to men who aren't him, taps your foot with his under the table when you make the mistake of forgetting that even when someone asks you a question, you're supposed to let him answer the question for you, unless he indicates otherwise. It's ok, he can excuse it the first time or two, you're just... getting adjusted. You didn't mean to do it. Just don't do it again.

 Honestly he doesn't outright tell you from the beginning that he expects obedience and compliance -- again, in his mind it's such a given, so ingrained as normal that he doesn't even think about it, and your defiance comes as a shock because he's never even really thought about such a thing. As soon as you're settled into forcibly married life, the first few days he just gives commands without thinking much of it... and is taken aback when you say no. He's not even certain that word is supposed to be in your vocabulary... It shatters the whole illusion of the submissive obedient wife thing. That's no good. But, ah, his father prepared him for moments like this. He just has to give you some money or a gift and an empty apology and then you'll be happy again. No? Ugh, you're being complicated again...

 He attributes it to a class or culture thing, if you're not from Liyue or simply not as wealthy. It's not your fault, you just came from... a less dignified background. Just give it time. Time and effort and reprimanding when necessary, but he trusts that you'll change and become the ideal wife in his head with time. And then, you'll stop bringing up all the dumb stuff you keep complaining about, like saying he's prejudiced or entitled, how you're in control of your body, blah blah... until then, it just goes in one ear and out the other.

 -----

 You'd think Kazuha would be one of the mildest offenders, yeah? Well, you'd be wrong.

 First of all, he's very, very unrealistic when it comes to projections of you in his head. When he imagines what you'll be like once you're with him, it's very idealistic and appeals to virtually every horny young boy's most eyeroll-worthy fantasies... but unlike most guys, he fails to realize how inaccurate to reality his fantasies are. He envisions this perfect "you" that never disagrees with anything he says, will do anything he asks, is always in a good mood, always affectionate, always horny, eager to go at it at a moment's notice. Always sweet and never mean. You'll hate every other guy that exists and only love him. He's quite disappointed to find out you're, you know, just like a guy, with varying emotions and moods depending on the timing and context. But that's okay. He still loves you. Even if he is disappointed.

 Then there's the actual negative things. The thing is... he doesn't realize it's bad. He's worse than Bennett/Chongyun/Thoma/Venti in terms of the actual things he thinks and does and says, but unlike some of the boys higher up on this list, he... doesn't even realize it might be offensive, the notion doesn't really cross his mind, it's so ingrained. He doesn't say anything in a degrading or authoritative tone. He says everything with that same soft smile and gentle voice as always, which makes the words themselves take a moment to process, and come as that much more of a shock, you question if you heard him wrong.

 If you're out wandering the land with him, camping out at night, he tells you not to worry, he can take care of the important stuff, and you can do the girl jobs, he adds with that same soft smile, pointing over to the fire and food you brought with you. You find yourself blinking, not sure if you heard him right... surely he doesn't seem like the type to actually think that way.

 And then, you start to think he thinks of you as fragile. He intervenes once, when you encounter very simple monsters on the road. No, no fighting for you... let him do that. It's mocking, really, even though he doesn't intend it that way -- he just can't help but sort of chuckle, you were actually about to draw a sword on those monsters, weren't you? That's so cute, you were actually going to try and fight them. Well, good thing he was here. You really make him worry about you, he hopes you don't actually think you could take anything on by yourself, do you...?

 And even after that, a few days later, you ask him why he can't trust you to at least go get the two of you supplies at least once... he tilts his head. Well, that's obvious, you'd go running off with someone else, as soon as you were presented with the option. It's okay, he knows you just can't control yourself, it's not your fault, it's just how you're... hardwired. Once again, said in that same soft, gentle voice he always has, as if he's talking about anything else, gives you a pat on the head as he speaks, not even noticing you staring at him in bewilderment. He says the things he says so sweetly, you have to take a moment to process before you realize how awful the words themselves actually were.

 When you get mad at him once, for a very valid reason, you quickly realize he has no intention of taking your anger seriously. He just smiles. Getting so upset over nothing... ah, are you hormonal today? Is it a cycle related thing? That explains it. Not for so much as a second does he seem to consider that maybe he was in the wrong and you have a reason to be mad. Your emotions and anger must automatically be due to something that invalidates your feelings, and is something he can tease and even belittle you for, in that soft way of his. This aspect is really bad, because you'll notice it repeats over and over, he never views your anger as valid. It's just hormones, a tantrum, or, as he once says when you get mad over something, just how you all are, getting upset over such little things... you don't bother to ask him what he means by that.

 When you finally snap at him about that specifically, he reacts with surprise. Why are you upset? It's not bad. What's that... You think he treats you like you're some kind of lesser?

 Well of course he does... with that same soft, precious little smile, and the slightest chuckle of amusement, he adds... because you are.

 You get another pat on the head as he speaks. It's not a bad thing. He's not sure why you're so upset about it. Everything has its place in nature, in the world, you're no different. There's no reason to get upset over it. He takes good care of you, and loves you a lot, so there's no need for you to worry about something so trivial. He doesn't even consider that you might find it derogatory or upsetting. It's just how things are. He thought everyone knew that? Why would that upset you? Besides, it's not like it causes you harm, it makes things easier for you if anything. You don't have to worry about the mentally taxing burden of making decisions for yourself. You can just leave that to him. He doesn't really get why this seems to make you upset, but if you're worried it'll make him treat you poorly, don't. He would never do that, so don't worry about it.

 It leaves you slack-jawed and somewhat shocked, but at first, you decide you have enough problems already, you can ignore him for now, as annoying as his attitude is. It becomes... increasingly difficult, once his thoughts start affecting expectations on you. You have been pretty docile and compliant thus far, realizing the position you were in and trying to earn your captor's trust, but that becomes more difficult with time. You start not wanting to follow the commands you're given (given so sweetly and with such a soft smile so that you actually didn't realize the wording was phrased more as a command and not a request until you stop to think about it...). You start becoming defiant.

 Oh... he feels some guilt. That's definitely his fault. He wasn't firm enough with you. Things... work best when everything performs its role correctly, you know? Couples also have roles, he thinks. Yours is to make him happy, be good, and take care of his needs, and his is to make sure you're safe and keep you in line, that's what he was always taught at least. So, really, if you fail at your job, it means he wasn't doing his right. So he'll have to be firmer with you, even though firmness is not his strong suit. He lets a lot of things slide, you know, you should probably be punished every now and then, for your own good. You may not understand it at the time, but it's for your benefit.

 Kazuha is also quietly a bit... critical (read: judgemental and insecure) of your, ah, choices. In a nice way! It's just... You know, when he met you, admittedly part of the reason he noticed you was because what you were wearing at the moment was... eye-catching. And you, ah, really made an active choice to dress that way didn't you? Which was actually a good thing, since it caught his eye and all, but still, other people are going to see you, too. You really should have thought more before you were going outside like that. It worries him to think that you are so naive that you thought that that was safe to wear...  but no worries, he can choose clothes for you from now on, whenever you're going into a public area, make sure you're not going to draw too many eyes.

 And if the opposite issue, that what you were wearing wasn't feminine enough, he wouldn't force you into femininity standards... He just encourages them. No, he has no idea what happened to your shirt and pants you were wearing for the outdoors, the cloth in the fire is just some old rags he tossed in overnight... But look, he already got you replacement clothes. These are the superior option anyway, skirts provide a better view when he's behind or below you and easier access -- er, easier for you to maneuver in.

 Similarly, behavioral standards are just there to keep you safe, and he can be lenient on many of them, he's not going to reprimand you just because you sit or carry yourself or talk a certain way, that's all fine. He'll still question some things, though, when it comes to interactions... because he has a certain paranoia.

 Which brings us to one more thing. Kazuha has been... influenced... by the sailors back when he was with the Crux fleet, on a very specific paranoia. Sailors are not known for being the most reserved and clean in regards to conversational topics. A bunch of older, often middle-aged men gathered around on the ship late at night, telling their tales of woe from their younger days or even their current frustrations -- and being sailors, who are gone on long voyages away from home, a lot of them have had some encounter with infidelity in their lives. They sigh and they grumble and at some point one of them turns to him, the poor misfit in the conversation that he is, and tells him to be smarter than they were and always watch his woman, because all of them deep down are whores. If he ever gets one, they tell him, gotta keep a proverbial leash on her, or she won't be yours for long.

Poor thing at the time just sort of gives a wide-eyed stare and awkwardly nods, but it eats away at him. Well, who would dismiss the advice of their elders? Once you come along, he takes it to heart. A little too much. He was already a rather possessive person by nature, but by the time darling comes along he's got a deep cheating paranoia. Unfortunately, he ends up going back to said crew members, after encountering them once again, for more advice, who end up only making it worse and filling his head with even more ideas. That it's in their nature. To go out and breed, get pregnant from the strongest mate they can find. Poor things just can't control themselves, so they told him, it's pitiful for their sake really. (Never mind the fact that boys will practically throw themselves off a cliff if it means they stand a chance of getting laid... that's different.)

 And the paranoia does certainly show itself. He gets uncharacteristically upset by you talking to other men, and in general becomes way too aggressive towards any other male. He's fairly quiet on the outside, merely a stern sort of pout on his face, but internally he's having horrible thoughts -- you probably want to have sex with them, too. If he wasn't here, maybe if he'd let you go run this errand or meet this other guy by yourself instead of coming with you, you'd be fucking him right now. He clenches his fist and grinds his teeth whenever you smile or laugh at the other guy. You're probably thinking about fucking him aren't you? The thought of it being, you know, a normal friendly human interaction... it doesn't even cross his mind. No, you definitely would if you could, this is proof those guys were right about what they told him. He becomes fairly hostile towards others, often giving them passive aggressive smiles as he stands behind you that are still very clearly interpreted as telling them to back off. He tries to hold it in, but at some point inevitably end up blurting out the question of do you like them more than me?  You don't think about anyone else when you're doing stuff with him, right? You should stop speaking to them. And don't speak to other women either. They'll just encourage you to cheat and justify it. Stop being around anyone else altogether. You don't need to talk to anyone, he can do all that for you.

 There's one more issue to be addressed, regarding that, which he'll get out of the way early on to know how paranoid he needs to be. Out of pure curiosity... What's your history like? Don't worry, you're not going to upset him. He understands that people make mistakes. Your mistakes just happen to be sleeping with anyone who wasn't him. He can forgive you. He just needs to know, so he can have a better gauge of just how much he needs to worry. ...Why does that seem to upset you? It's common knowledge, he thought, that the higher your body count, the more likely you are to... have challenges staying loyal. He's just trying to help you with that, that's all. You're getting so upset now, saying mean things about him that he's some kind of bad person for judging you based on that... see, there you go with getting upset over nothing again. But don't worry, it's cute, in a way.

-----

 Xiao is sort of a unique case, mostly because he's a bit too disconnected to fully understand these things to begin with. Human women are some sort of foreign, alien species to him. But, rather hilariously, his primary feeling towards women is that he's... intimidated.

 In his defense, your kind are terrifying. Unfortunately, due to his lack of interaction, he has to go on the words of wisdom (read: random laborers' and drunk inn-goers' ramblings) of human men to learn what women are like. In other words, he gets all of his information secondhand and firmly believes that, thanks to his listening in on conversations, he has received a thorough education on them and their ways, takes whatever they say as the truth. This... Does not spell good things for a darling.

 From what he understands, there's all these special rules and guidelines you're supposed to follow when interacting with them... it's said that they speak cryptically, they say things where you're supposed to infer what they mean, because they don't say what they actually mean, you have to sort their words out like some sort of horrible, emotionally sadistic puzzle. Sometimes they will say they are fine, but they are not actually fine, they're upset, and then will get mad if one cannot decipher this. Worst of all, apparently they sometimes say something is fine to do, they will tell you it's fine, go ahead, do whatever you want, but then if you actually do it, they'll become angry. Sometimes they get very quiet and only answer questions with cold, short replies; this means they are upset, but for some incomprehensible reason, they do not want to tell the male why they are upset and he must figure it out himself. 

It sounds horrible. What is the reason for this behavior? He's not sure. Even the human men lament over their inability to understand women, he's heard them call the women "confusing," or "impossible to please," and if the human men feel that way, that means he doesn't stand a chance. Thus, his primary feelings towards a female human darling are just confusion and intimidation.

 But furthermore, he decides to do some preemptive observations by watching women that come through the inn as if he's taking notes on a wild species, but... That doesn't help much at all. He watches this one couple eating at the inn... everything seems to be going fine, and suddenly, the male seems to say or do one wrong thing, and the female snaps at him, becoming angry and yelling and lashing out, throws a drink at him, slaps him in the face, and storms off. He watches with wide eyes, recoiling from his perch somewhere up on the inn. The female wrath is horrifying. If you did that to him... it would hurt his feelings a lot... he can't have that. He's not even sure what the man did wrong, and from the looks of it, the man himself doesn't know what he did wrong either. Are the human women truly this volatile? It's even worse than he thought. He'd rather face a hundred monsters at once than be on the receiving end of that. Nothing is more frightening.

 It gets worse once he actually has you all captured and away from the world. Due to the fact that, in his pessimism, he tends to assume the worst of darling, constantly thinks that you do everything on purpose and are always trying to trick him -- well now, in addition to that he just pushes everything he doesn't understand, like, or want to deal with, onto the excuse of you being female. Again, he gets his ideas from what he's overheard... except, well, he gets a lot of bits and pieces of information and sort of puts them together himself, filling in the gaps based on what he comes up with that makes sense to him, and as you can imagine, this is not good. 

You are complaining about not having seen sunlight in several months, or crying over being tied up all the time? Hmph, that's just your hormones making you all emotional. ...Well, he's not entirely sure what hormones are... some incurable disease that affects only the female humans, makes them get upset all the time for no reason. They make you upset irrationally, so that must be the explanation for every time you are upset about anything he doesn't think you should be upset about.

 No, you can't go outside. He heard a bunch of drunk guys at the inn talking about their woes as they tend to do, several were talking about ex wives or ex girlfriends and claimed that human women will run off with another man the first opportunity they get, because they're never happy and content and always want to have more. Especially if they are mad or bitter (which he has reason to believe you are, since you complain about being here), they do it just to get revenge on the man, how awful. They're also insatiable, apparently, such was the term that was used. They have to have sex all the time, that's what gets their defiance and meanness out... probably by removing those bad hormones. Sort of like how exorcism rituals remove demons, or such is the comparison he thinks makes sense. So if you don't do it all the time, the disease will get worse and worse, you have to expel it with sex. Thankfully, he can provide that, so you won't need to get it elsewhere anyway. But logically, then, you should understand why he can't take you outside, it's a horrible idea.

 He has learned some tips, though. If they are defiant, once again, you just have to fuck them really hard, and then they'll go back to being obedient. A very helpful tip. When they are upset, you can make them happy again, and get them to stop being mean, by giving them gifts that they enjoy being recipients of, such as large amounts of flowers and things made out of gold and things that taste sweet. If you are ever mean to him, expect to wake up to a gigantic pile of qingxin by your bed (he did not think to remove all the dirt from the stems though...) that he spent several hours plucking off various mountaintops. Speaking of happiness, he's been alive a long time, he can remember a time when the human wives were all a lot more controlled, they were very obedient and docile, and stayed in their homes a lot. They seemed perfectly happy. Maybe you should try being more obedient, and you'd be happier. It would be a lot nicer for him too, he thinks, so it would be a win-win.

 On the bright side, although he has more of a cemented concept of what is considered standards of femininity than Razor, that sort of thing doesn't matter in terms of outward standards. He could care less about your posture or way of speaking or the way you dress, the length of your hair, the vulgarity of your language, things like that. He is (sometimes) aware of them, but doesn't care if you meet the ones like that, that are related to appearances and socially constructed concepts. It doesn't matter if you have short hair, boyish clothing (you won't need clothes with him anyway), speech filled with profanity or vulgarity, unfeminine posture or stance, etc. None of that matters. What matters is that you're nice. None of that scary human female stuff where they get all angry and yell... be sweet and happy all the time, and don't get upset over things, like he likes. And do all the things he tells you to. That's all. Oh, and don't fight the sex... it makes no sense for you to do that, since not only is it important to cure your issues, but also, that's your purpose in the first place.

 What? Degrading...? Why would you think that? See, the whole idea that being made for sex and babies is dehumanizing is kinda socially constructed in and of itself, so to him, he doesn't see why you would find such a thing offending. For him, it's just... obvious. Things are designed for the function for which they were created. Like how a cup is made to hold water. A lock is made to keep something closed off. Their very purpose is obvious through their characteristics. Why are living beings any different? Like how he is strong and has certain abilities, he's made to fight and protect you. 

You, weak as you are, clearly are not. But, you have these warm wet holes, they fit so snugly around his dick and squeeze it really nicely... and it fits inside perfectly, so it makes sense that it was intended for this purpose. You have hips, clearly designed on each side to be grabbed, your body has these curved parts that make it easier to hold onto. This seems like the obvious purpose. Your face and voice are nice to see and hear, and there is realistically no other purpose for such than just that. You are warm, this is pleasant. You have soft thighs and even softer tits, what other purpose could these things possibly have, if not for him to rest his head on? And when you consider the obvious purposes of your various parts, and that you as an entity are composed of said parts, your purpose as a whole being is clear -- your purpose is to be utilized. Why does it make you so upset for that to be acknowledged?

 Besides, you're irrational right? And if it's irrational, there's no point in even trying to understand it, to listen to you and process what you say. There's no point in hearing you out. He has heard it said that the women lie all the time for no reason. Well, you can't deceive him if he simply chooses not to entertain your claims in the first place.

 And you are very weak. Like... how the humans have some pets that are small and weak and cute, their sole purpose is to provide the owner with affection. Or fragile vases and decorative antiques, but they are very fragile and easily broken, so they must be preserved. You're like that. You have to be taken care of, protected. But it's not degrading, no. No matter how much you explain, he cannot comprehend why the idea of being a possession or property or designed for sex makes you feel bad. You're very valuable to him... that should be enough. In fact, all your nice parts make you even more valuable, because they provide you with more use! ...Saying so seems to only make you more upset though, and he's not sure why. It's all so confusing. He's starting to understand the human men's woes. They were right, you are impossible to understand.

 -----

 Kaeya is the absolute, complete, total epitome of a 'nice guy'. He thinks that him giving you the bare minimum of the basic respect for another human being possible is not only going above and beyond, but should be rewarded. Similar to Thoma but much more shamelessly, genuinely entitled, and far more aggressively acting on that entitlement, much more pushy, and expects results much sooner. Like, that's how it works yeah? Be nice to girl = get sex; it's a very simple formula that is supposed to apply under all conditions. Yeah, yeah, he'd totally be nice to you anyway, it's not like you have to, but like... well, to say he deserves it, it's not in a demanding way, just in a... logical way. He'd be nice to you no matter what, but it's only fair to have an expectation of reward. That's how the world works, you can't just expect people to always be good without providing them with incentives. 

And much like Venti, he's one of those guys that's very very all for the idea of liberation and stuff like that because that just makes it so much easier to get what he wants! And will pretend to be very pro-freedom and choices for girls... as long as those choices are the ones he wants you to make. It becomes blatantly obvious very quickly that every single nice word or action is just an attempt to get between your legs. And unfortunately for him, it seems to not be working.

 The other biggest offense is the massive slut-shaming. Like, what do you mean you slept with someone else before, ever? You just have no self respect, do you. Even if it's literally just one, he'll still find a way to make you feel bad about it. But uh, he does need to know the exact number... like immediately... not out of insecurity or anything, just... couples should be honest with each other, you know. Absolutely devastated if it's anything he considers "high" (read: 1=not great but okay, 2=pushing it, 3+=soul-crushing), but he keeps a smile no matter what, just sighs. You... probably just slept with so many people (yes, even if it's like 2-5 he'll still use 'many') because you're just so sweet and easily taken advantage of, yeah? You should be more discriminate and have some self respect and not just sleep around with anyone who wants it, make them work for it! Make them prove that they're genuinely nice people who really care about you. Like he is. Use him as a standard of comparison, yeah? He's the kind of person you should sleep with. ...Or maybe, like, the person, rather than just the type... and since you're so sweet, he knows you're not like, the kind of person who would ever be sexually active with more than one person at once, so there's... no need to worry... because if you were, you'd tell him, so he assumes.

 Yet, he also... Reverse slut shames? Like, what do you mean you won't sleep with him within two hours of knowing him? You're not like, a prude or something right? He says it with a chuckle in his tone, but there's some genuine concern there... Or maybe you just think you're too good for him and you're trying to play hard to get? Yeah, that sounds more likely. Trying to make him meet a bunch of requirements to sleep with you because you're a manipulative little thing... Well, he won't say that part out loud, but that's certainly his internal thoughts.

 He's also the type you can go to crying over a toxic relationship, being cheated on or abused... he'll comfort you alright (what an asshole! Who would do something like that? Someone who has something as great as you and was actually nice would appreciate it!), but be sure to alternate between what comes across as genuine comfort, mixed with the sentiment of "well you're the one that chose to fuck him :/ There were probably red flags you just ignored :/ You shouldn't have dated an asshole, you could have had a good guy (like me) :/" Just enough niceness to get you to second guess yourself when he goes in for the jabs -- he was being so nice just a moment ago, so maybe he didn't mean that other part in a mean way, right? Definitely the type to refer to himself as a "good" or "nice" guy (he's not) and say he would have been so much better (he'd be worse) and treat you with so much respect (he would not).

 If you sleep with someone else, you clearly have no common sense or self respect. You should think more highly of yourself than to give yourself away like that. But if you won't sleep with him, you're conceited, you really think too highly of yourself. Someone needs to pull you off your high horse and break the reality to you. You're not so great that someone like him is gonna wait around until you feel "ready" or whatever dumb excuse you're using.

 He's not gonna straight up whine, since that would be kinda pathetic... so if the smiles and charm doesn't work, he just gaslights you. It's been what, a week since you met? And you still haven't had sex even once! You know that's like, really abnormal for most couples, right? Do you really like him at all, even? Or are you just using him for money or favors or something? He's good at talking, guilting, gaslighting his way into it, using points he knows full well manipulates mentalities internalized within you through female socialization, like not wanting to be boring and not wanting to disappoint him and not wanting to be made out to be using someone. And gods forbid you pull some kind of 'until marriage' line. Oh, come on. That's outdated. No one does that anymore. Besides, the whole point of being able to have sex now is that it's more, uh, what's the word... empowering, right. Really, you're doing yourself a disservice by not having sex now. The only reason you're holding back is because you're been ingrained with this terrible notion by society that it's wrong, and that's why you've convinced yourself you're just someone that needs a while to feel comfortable. You poor thing. You really need to free your mind of that mentality.

 But no matter what happens, he will absolutely gaslight you into thinking it was your fault. He acts like you were doing something wrong and trying to be sneaky while he's super smart and clever for seeing through it, as if it were intentional on your end. Would definitely aim to pick at clothes -- you should know better than to go out dressed like that. You were trying to get guys' attention, probably manipulate them into buying you drinks or something with implied promises of getting laid but then you were just gonna bolt and not follow through. You totally wanted someone to see you like that and lust after you. You want guys to look at you and fantasize about putting their dick in you, to chase after you like hungry dogs. You really thought you could just do whatever you wanted, and not face any consequences, huh? You had to learn your lesson the hard way, thankfully at least from someone who cares about you.

 And that blame continues beyond clothes, too. You were acting really provocatively, too. You probably really wanted it, and didn't want to admit to it. You just feel embarrassed about what you did and now want to call it nonconsensual when you know full well it was consensual. See, that's the socially ingrained mentality again, just admit that you wanted it, he's not going to judge you... not out loud, at least. And no, you weren't drugged. You were very intoxicated, though. Not his fault, since he was totally just as drunk as you... but still, really, you're lucky it was him and not someone else. But really, allowing yourself to reach that point... what did you expect to happen? You made the choice to intoxicate yourself, knowing you were out in a public area with plenty of guys roaming around, you were basically aski-- ...well, he knows maybe that exact choice of words would be going too far, would make you mad. Ahem, you were certainly aware of the risk, and chose to take it anyway. So really, wasn't this the best possible outcome? You knew exactly what you were getting into, so foolish, but hey, he technically saved you from ending up waking up to someone much worse! He makes sure to paint a horrible image in your head so that you feel lucky, grateful even, and totally forgotten any ideas of accusing him of anything.

 Also, he can be very, very predatory in the sense that he will sense and target the exact type of girl he knows he can walk all over and she won't do anything. You're some sort of worker in the knight headquarters or something, not looking at you round a corner and bump right into him, papers getting strewn everywhere... and this girl, as he sees, is immediately apologetic, nearly hysterically so, stuttering apologies and panicking to pick up everything with trembling hands, you bow your head over and over, get teary-eyed even, and frantically say you're so sorry, that was my fault... oh... you're definitely that exact type of girl he was hoping to meet. A doormat that will do anything to make men happy. He imagines you would be so, so easy to manipulate. He knows full well that it's due to a socialization that girls get projected onto them, that they're pressured to behave that way, and that while the ones with a sense of self-worth usually overcome it and learn to stick up for themselves... the weak ones like you succumb to it. And really, isn't it better, then, that you get taken advantage of by someone who cares about you, rather than someone who would just use you and throw you away? He's doing you a favor, really.

 That's most likely what causes a fixation with you in the first place, and observing you, and some mild experimentation, proves all his initial assumptions correct. You will tolerate all the touches at work, you just stiffen and let it happen, you won't say a word to anyone. You'd probably rather do anything than disappoint a guy in authority over you. You'd probably do anything you're told to do, even if you don't want to, because you feel obligated to please. And you'd probably knowingly walk right into allowing yourself to be taken away, like a sheep to the slaughter. In other words, you're perfect.

 -----

 Zhongli is a different type of infuriating because of the infantilization you endure. Part of it, to be fair, is because at his age, he sort of inherently views you as not really any different than a child. If you're under 500 years old or so, you might as well have been born yesterday, naive and foolish and impulsive and all that. Likewise, a visionless human is practically as defenseless as a baby, in comparison to the sheer power he's both wielded and witnessed in his lifetime. You're helpless, like a little lost kitten or something.

 But it goes double for a female darling because, well, a mere mortal human is already fragile enough, but to be among the weaker, slower, smaller, less intelligent half of humanity just makes you that much more vulnerable. You're far too fragile, you see. In his mind, you will break at the slightest of force, you could never handle strenuous tasks or anything physically challenging.

 Which is, bizarrely, part of why he's especially likely to pick up some poor fighter darling he stumbles across. See, no matter how good at fighting you may appear to be, he rationalizes that you're merely just getting by, keeping your head barely above water, by sheer luck and utilizing strategy, not by any actual skill. He can instantly convince himself that you're actually in very, very urgent need, that you're barely getting by. Oh, you're probably so afraid, you've probably just so narrowly escaped defeat a multitude of times, unbelievable luck keeping you from ending up taken or worse. So, he's saving you from what would have inevitably happened to you eventually -- you would be defeated, captured, and... well, unpleasant things would happen to you. They would treat you terribly, merely use you... they wouldn't care for you like he does. And he does take good care of you, really, even if you often feel like you're going to blow a fuse from the attitude he has towards you.

 See, he also thinks this is more... suitable. Really, it's kind of unsavory for you to have been out there, fighting and roaming all free. It's a waste of your body, being put to use for something pointless and not what it was intended for. It's a waste of your time, which could have been spent making some man's life happier, which is far more important than whatever it was you were doing before. You have so much use and value, and you were out there wasting it! He understands why, though, you became disillusioned with your own power, overestimated yourself, allowed yourself to neglect your higher purpose and instead indulged in having personal goals and selfish wants and desires... luckily he took you away before that would have gotten you hurt. The downside of that is you perpetually insist you can take care of yourself, that you were doing just fine, that you would have been able to defeat anything that came after you... sigh. So naive. It's cute, really, like a child who doesn't understand how the adult world works, but is talking like they do, which is always quite amusing... you're like that. After all, women and children are somewhat alike in that way, they both like to avoid reality in favor of allowing themselves to believe they're far more powerful, capable, and knowledgeable than they actually are. You are so innocent, so unaware of how the world really is and how weak you truly are, no one was there to make sure you understood that.

 But sometimes, you force his hand. Sometimes you need to be shown, because you can't be reasoned with (although that's to be expected, of course, unreasonable by nature). Sometimes you need to be held down, need to be held still, just so you can fight and thrash about and finally understand where you stand. It makes your blood boil, your stomach churn to be talked down to, asked if you're done with your tantrum and can stop being so unreasonable now. Not that he gets too impatient with said tantrums... they're natural, bound to happen at times, given your nature, so he's patient in expecting you to calm down.

 He's patient with a reeducation on your ways as well. A lot of our boys react rather badly to a high-promiscuity darling, seeing her as needing change, needing to have her autonomy stripped away, punished for it even... Zhongli alleviates you of responsibility a bit more than that, though, paints a more innocent picture of you in his head, there's more pity. Sure, you were still out of control, breeding like a little rabbit in heat, but there's a lot more emphasis on how sad it is for you. You poor thing, you have these needs that have to be taken care of, and other people were taking advantage of you. It's not your fault you so desperately need to be bred, those others could see that, and used you.

 ...That being said. It is still an issue. He rationalizes your sexuality a little differently than most, should you turn out to have a rather active drive or active experiences. See, women are supposed to be more pure of mind and all that, they're naturally innocent and chaste, they aren't supposed to be lewd and perverse. But every now and then, and as is the case with you, there will be one with some sort of, ah, chemical imbalance, he guesses, causing the girl in question to crave sex and do unfeminine things that taint your purity, like masturbating and fantasizing and, if gone unchecked, fornication. That's no fault of your own, and really, you should have had special consideration -- a girl of that type should be married off as quickly as possible to a man that can... adequately handle that, and ensure those needs are met.

 Speaking of masturbating though, that's something off limits to you. You'll have to have some measures put in place to ensure you can't. Your pleasure is, like every other part of you, property, and you are not the one that gets to decide on it. That, too, seems to be something you have an issue with, no self control to prevent either of these things, and no one was given control over you to ensure you didn't engage in these behaviors.

 It's your upbringing's fault, really, they should've recognized your tendencies and dealt with that appropriately rather than allowing you to run off and become a slut, and the fault of all the men you know, since they manipulated you into it. It's not your fault. Your mind simply operates on physical sensations and urges and can't process consequences, and thus people take advantage of you, and that's precisely why you should have been watched over more carefully. But that works out decently in the end. Sometimes bad things happen for a reason, and for you, it was so that you could eventually end up with him.

 After all, this was all for your own wellbeing. He's lived long enough to have seen plenty of female warriors... they depend on cunning, agility, or powers unnatural to them, such as visions. But he's also seen many of them end up in situations where they are forced to rely on brute strength, and, well, that always ends very quickly. And it ends in the same way each time... said ending is not pleasant. He's seen plenty of female captains and generals and goddesses even, taken down and reduced to a mere slave or toy by someone who so easily overpowered them... it's unfortunate, and he wasn't going to let that happen to you. If it were a perfect world, perhaps it would be acceptable for you to run around on your own, but it isn't, which is why you must be protected from others and yourself alike, you need to be owned and controlled so you don't endanger yourself.

 ...Or, rather, in an alternate scenario, he may very well be the cause of that happening to you.

 Morax of many years ago was not quite so forgiving and patient as he would later become. Alternatively, in his more aggressive days, a goddess may have very well been the perfect target during the war or any number of other conflicts. He was a lot less patient... and a lot less tolerant. Now, he would find it amusing and cute, but in those days, being some cold, arrogant woman who thinks you're so great just because of godhood would merely get under his skin. It's like an insult, you know? You look down on him like you think you're better. And he doesn't take very kindly to those who try and act like they're superior. There's just some sort of instinctive, primal even, urge to put you in your place, ruin you and turn you into something he can own for himself. It's an intoxicating fantasy on its own, but it won't stay fantasy for very long... he tends to act on what he wants rather quickly.

 It also serves as a good model to the humans as to why it was wrong to ever hold you in any reverence. Don't they know that, even among themselves, there's a strength difference between their males and females? And yet they chose to worship you, undoubtedly knowing you were weak? Strange. Well, they'll get a good idea now, what with you being kept all naked and chained up on the ground, sitting at his feet. The way you practically tremble out of sheer rage, he can see it as you sit there, scowling and eyes watering, anger and humiliation swelling in your chest... it's endearing, really.

 But it was necessary -- your kind aren't meant to have pride. They're made to be humble. Just because you somehow managed to get out of line doesn't mean that he doesn't have a responsibility as a superior to you to ensure you get back in your place. You'll learn humility one way or another, along with obedience and all the other little things you're supposed to. You have a chain leash connected to the collar on your neck, so even now if he doesn't like your tone or body language, or if you somehow have the audacity to speak without permission, he can just give it a nice warning tug.

  -----

 Albedo and Scaramouche are both awful for the same reason -- they both have some bitterness, abandonment paranoia and horrible inferiority complexes (and consequently/defensively developed superiority ones) due to a female figure in their early lives, and have to overcompensate for it as a result. It basically amounts to that they have to have darling herself see herself as beneath them, they want to be looked up to, and will seethe over the slightest notion that you don't see yourself as just as inferior to them as they see you.

 However, they have another similarity in that they don't show these sentiments very much, at least not at the start. It's all internal thoughts and subtle, often passive-aggressive efforts. So they sort of have a silent power struggle, where they constantly want to be better than darling and feel threatened (or rather, it wounds that fragile masculinity, poor things) whenever darling is actually smart or strong or capable. Because if you're any of those things, that means there's a chance you won't see him as better than you!! And then he won't feel superior (and needed), and you might behave inappropriately (and not need him, and belittle him, and if you don't need him you can disregard him, he won't mean anything to you, and that would hurt...). That can't stand.

 Of course, then, it's easy to fall back on the comfort of the notion that oneself is inherently superior to someone else by nature, and thus that difference is innate, unchangeable, and will remain true no matter what, so there's no threat. Of course, this does not work out as well when darling wants to act in defiance of that.

 Honestly fem!darling brings out the absolute worst side of Albedo. Like, he's infinitely more obnoxious for a female darling than he would be a male one just because she triggers his complexes and, consequently, makes him feel a compulsion to constantly subtly remind her how much smarter and superior he is. He has a somewhat mix of a modest and prideful nature most of the time. For another guy, he can admit to having not known something, or someone else being more knowledgeable. You'll hear the occasional line out of him, he's very humble normally, especially when dealing with things that aren't his field: That's not really something I know a lot about... hm, I actually didn't know that... oh, that's just a guess, I don't really have sufficient experience on the matter...

But with female darling? No. That all goes out the window. He knows everything about everything that has ever existed and cannot be wrong and, most important of all, you are the opposite. He's infinitely smarter than you and more capable than you by nature and has to make sure you are very well aware of that fact. The thing is, he is very much NOT an outwardly assertive nor confrontational person, quite the opposite. His nature is to go about that subtly and passive-aggressively... except as time goes on, he gets more and more irritated that it's not working and starts to fail at the subtle part, and it results in obvious passive-aggressiveness.

 The worst position to be in would be some sort of assistant or scholar under him (prior to being snatched up and locked away somewhere). He has to make sure to make you feel dumb, or at least inferior. Can't have you feeling comparable. It's best if you are beneath him, but if you are actually intelligent -- or, gods forbid, better at his occupation than him -- he gets... twitchy. He stays silent a lot, maintains a neutral face, but you can feel a sort of... ominous tension in your interactions. He grips the papers he's holding rather tightly, so much so that by the time he hands them off to you, they have creases in them. It almost looks like he's clenching his jaw whenever you speak to him. All his movements are rough, the way he sets things down and moves things almost as if slamming them.

 He always makes sure to double-check your work "just in case" (silently seething when he realizes you made zero mistakes, he was hoping there would be something to correct you on and subtly exaggerate how badly you messed up...), chooses his words carefully to psychologically manipulate you (oh, he can handle the difficult part, you can do what's left... Or hey, maybe this is a bit too advanced for you, maybe you'd be better off with a simpler task...), or just outright holding you to unreasonable expectations of workload, acting as if it's a normal amount, in hopes you start to doubt yourself. And then, when you struggle to complete the enormous amount and insane difficulty of work given to you in such a short time frame... oh, don't worry, he's not upset. He thought it might be a little too much for you, it's his fault for overestima-- ah, not thinking it through. Here, why don't you do something you're better suited for, like uh... put these up on the shelf in alphabetical order. You can handle that, yeah?

 Basically it's just an attempt to gaslight you into believing that it's a normal amount of work, and that your failure to complete it in time is an issue with you, that you can't handle the normal amount of work and need to step down to something more within your capabilities. Make you feel stupid. Make you come to realize just how big the gap between the two of you is. Which is only how it should be, the term "natural order" exists for a reason.

 Also. Albedo is the worst about mansplaining. It's. Infuriating. Especially if darling isn't someone working with him, and thus has no experience in his line of work. It's part for self-reassurance that he's smarter than you and that you think so too, and part just wanting to be impressive. But it's not just alchemy, no, it's everything, it's like he thinks you were born yesterday and have to have basic concepts explained to you like you're a kid. It becomes infuriating very quickly. Like, yes, you understand how that thing works, everyone understands how that thing works, you don't need it explained, especially not with a not-so-subtle condescending tone. However, it's harder if it is something you don't know much about. He is a master of making up absolute bullshit on the spot about any topic he doesn't know about and saying it with full calm confidence, so he can make up literally anything and convince you he's right.

 But like he's not blatant and cocky about it, he does it in his very normal monotone, kinda flat voice, with just that slight hint of condescension. But that just makes it more effective, because it doesn't seem like he's showing off. It's very subtle, just like how he just kinda gives backhanded compliments that end up making you feel dumb.  He also does it with things that he has absolutely no reason to think he knows more about than you, things that apply to your own biology. Yes, he will mansplain periods, pregnancy, and your body to you, as if you are not literally the one who experiences those things and owns that body.

 And he gets more and more obvious with time as to the root of it all, more or less dropping any pretenses of fairness or trying to hide how he actually thinks once he finally decides enough is enough and that he needs to go ahead and get you locked inside to start working on reforming you. It quickly devolves from "you as an individual are falling behind and thereby inferior" and into "you must be inherently inferior because of what you are." But he doesn't really care if you realize why he thinks you're -- no, why you are inferior. You being offended and appalled doesn't change that he's right. He has really the same mentalities as others, but he uses big fancy words and pseudo-science to "explain" you and thus justify said mentality.

 Perhaps worst of all is the atrocious amounts of gross, outlandish pseudoscience that he chooses to believe because, well, he wants to. And he will attempt to spew the same bullshit to you too. Yes, you are hardwired to have a desire to be submissive. The only reason you don't feel it is because of social conditioning, society is way too lenient these days (despite the fact that the idea that you can be socially conditioned otherwise would contradict the idea that it's innate... well, whatever, that part's not important). But if you tried to behave properly, you'd actually be a lot happier. When you're obedient, it sets off receptors in your brain, gives you a big boost of happiness, you should try it. Also, you evolved to stay in smaller ranges of space like a home, which is why keeping you inside or within the encampment area boundaries all the time is for your own good. Oh, and when you get cum inside of you, it makes you pair-bond faster (this is why pulling out isn't an option, hopefully you can grasp that).

 You're naturally more emotional. Hormones, you know, and because that's... well that's just how your brain works. Lower IQ and all that. Yes he's very qualified to talk about brain science, but that's not important. Anyway, that's why your feelings on virtually everything don't really deserve to be taken seriously. It's not that you don't matter to him, of course not, it's just that your opinions don't matter. Big difference. There's no point in listening to your thoughts because they are going to be inherently swayed by your overemotional, illogical brain. And the fact that you refuse to accept that in and of itself is evidence to that -- see, if you were observant and logical and rational, you'd be able to humble yourself and acknowledge your inferiority. But because you're emotional by nature, you just get mad about it and stubbornly insist otherwise.

 It's all simply facts, the way things are. No use arguing against it... so don't. You're a lot more likeable when you're being nice and agreeable. There's a reason that's been a standard for so long, you know. It's simply the model that works best. You should just be loving and sweet and don't disagree or have any opinions or thoughts of your own and open your legs on command, and he can take care of everything else. Easy. It's good for him too. Yes, it's been proven that the depression from not getting sex when they want it can make a man's productivity fall by number-made-up-on-the-spot percent. You were never going to contribute anything of value back when he was entertaining your silly little fantasy of working alongside him, so if you really want to help so much, just be good for him. That's what works best, it's natural.

 And on that matter, perhaps it's that naturally inquisitive mind of his, but he does like to really observe your... decline. It's an experiment of it's own, in a way. Watching you gradually have what he says repeated to you so much that you start to believe it yourself. You start to feel inferior. You become more docile. More submissive. His talk of how you're so emotional and irrational gaslights you on your own sense of reason, makes you question if you can even trust your own thoughts. Eventually, you'll realize you can't... and come to rely on his instead, just as intended. Which is fine, that model of partnership has been what's kept humanity alive for so long.

  -

 Scaramouche is more... negative. You KNOW this boy resents women, has a complex for sure. There's definitely a subconscious power struggle in his head as a result of the whole origin thing, he has to feel more important and superior to you in every conceivable way. Yes, a power struggle... even though it's more or less completely fabricated in his head and more like him struggling with himself while you're blissfully unaware.

 Consequently, he just cannot stand the thought of a female having power over him in any way... Even the authority of the tsaritsa bothers him a little bit to be honest, he tries his best to ignore that, which is doable, since she's more distant. But if a woman was ever put in like, a position of authority directly above him to the point where she's constantly present and telling him what to do, it would drive him up the wall even more than it would if it were a guy in that same position. Like, it's just not right, you're supposed to be beneath him, not the other way around.

 But in that awful, horrible worst case scenario, or if you have a roughly equal position (also a horrible scenario, but slightly less so)... he struggles with it internally, having to come to terms with the idea that you're on equal footing and status, does that mean you're just as capable as him? Not that that's threatening or anything but -- wait. No, wait, there's a simple explanation. It certainly wasn't your brains or prowess or capabilities that got you anywhere in life. He forgot that you have the option of cheating your way to whatever you want, a free ticket to any position you desire -- all you have to do is sleep with the right person. Or people.

 He tells himself that you definitely fucked several people to get there, there's no way you could have ever earned that spot on your own. You just get to suck and ride your way to success, he has to actually be good at what he's doing. Not everyone can have it as easy as you. That's probably how you get everything in life, really, you've never had to work for anything, you just sell your body out enough and get everything taken care of for you. Not to mention, you're very manipulative, there's so many guys out there that will do whatever you want just for you to give them a passing glance. Pathetic, really. He hates guys like that, they enable conceited, stuck-up sluts like you.

 Honestly he's obsessive be it positive or negative, in your case something of both, but in many ways negative. It's almost a hate obsession, that turns into an attachment, but certainly starts off negative. He has to constantly put you down in his own head, in order to feel more confident that the two of you definitely aren't equal in any way and he has every right to look down on you. In fact, the tsaritsa probably gives you favoritism too, since you're both female, so you have her AND all the men in authority letting you climb ranks without any real effort on your part. It's unbelievable AND annoying that such a thing could happen, someone with no skill ending up in such a high rank.

 Also, a lot of his disdain comes from him being one of those guys that's secretly mad at himself for having so much lust and discomfort with it, but deflects blame onto you for causing that feeling. You come in one day wearing something too short on your thighs, too low on your chest, and he finds his eyes and mind drifting... only to snap out of it after a few moments. Intentional, of course. You want people to look at you. You would do something like that, no sense of dignity or self-respect. Well, too bad, you can get all the attention you want from all the lowlifes he watches drool over you (they're absolutely pathetic and it infuriates him to see them bend over backwards for you, you're manipulating them by... existing... with that body... and being generally pleasant, and you're just allowed to get away with that!), but not him, he's not about to waste his time looking at such an eyesore as your whorishness, he has better things to care about. He'd never waste his time even thinking about a whore that doesn't deserve a second glance. Yes, you'd probably open your legs for the first person that came by. You seem like the type.

 Or maybe not -- no, you're pretty... of course, that's the only thing you have going for you, but pretty ones like you are usually conceited and picky. You want to show off and get all the benefits and attention, lead people on but never put out. At least if you keep going like that, existing as a tease and never following through, you'll eventually get what's coming to you, and it'll be well-deserved.

 But it doesn't matter because he doesn't care about you. Not at all. You're like, not really a person, just a set of holes to be used by someone. And someone will, you seem irresponsible, someone's definitely gonna knock you up and then you'll be forced to step down. Or better yet, someone will finally have enough of your nonsense and knock you down a peg. Finally put you to use at something you're actually good at, like being a breeding machine, rather than wasting time and resources being an unproductive member who just exists to be eye candy for others. But he doesn't care. He's not going to lay awake at night seething over you and your dumb smile and useless body or anything.

 The thing is, all of this... is internal.

 You live in this man's head rent-free, the subject of his daily inner episodes of reasoning with himself on every insecurity by providing reasons to not feel threatened or intimidated by you, to remind himself he's better than you, utterly obsessing over his desire to put you down... meanwhile, you're pretty sure he's only acknowledged your existence like, once. It's entirely in his own head. He avoids interactions with you at all costs, whenever you're around he doesn't even bother looking up at you, and keeps a neutral, bored-looking face, merely seething on the inside at a distance because how dare you... have a body with all those curves and soft parts... and a voice that sounds so nice... and one time you walked past him really close and now he knows you smell so good too... ugh. If he's forced to interact with you, he'll just come across to you as bored, apathetic... like he doesn't care (because he doesn't), like you're wasting his time (because you are). Or, he may even put on the "decent human being" act even, knowing he either has to force that or risk being too obviously oddly bitter towards someone he's never really talked to.

 He does cope with the frustration in one way, though... he calls you certain terms, whenever he has unpleasant interactions. Grumbles and mutters them under his breath, quietly enough to not be heard, but just once or twice you catch the words just when you're walking off and he thinks you're out of earshot. Bitch. Slut. Whore. It's cathartic. Well, even though you hear it, it was probably directed at someone else, since you've never really interacted much and he has no reason to dislike you, right?

 Except he can find a reason to make you out to be a horrible person, regardless of personality. The doormat type that never sticks up for yourself, always apologetic and quiet? You just want people to feel pity for you, so you act pathetic. It's manipulative, you want people to forgive you whenever you screw up by being so pitiful they can't bring themselves to be mean to you. The happy ray of sunshine type who's friendly to everyone? It's all an act. You're probably a huge bitch underneath that, you're just nice to get on people's good side so you can learn more about them or manipulate them. That's taking into account, though, any female that isn't inherently self-sacrificing and doormat-ish and stands up for herself qualifies as a "huge bitch." The only truly good women are the ones that have no sense of self-worth.

 And worst of all, a stern, calloused, serious type? Takes no nonsense, never smiles, very firm and assertive? Ugh. Literally the worst type of female. You shouldn't be allowed to be like that. It makes him truly seethe, what gives you the right to be so confident and cold, especially to him? You think you're better than him, huh? No, no, you're coping. You're actually totally insecure deep down. Really, you're probably just bitter because you are a female... you probably wish you were a man so people would take you more seriously. Because you know no one actually does... and with good reason. You just don't like acknowledging that there's a good reason.

 After... obtaining you, though, he has to remind you, too. Remind you of what you're good for, put you in your place. You're so lucky you have some use to him.

 The name calling doesn't stop either, just a bit different. He does that thing, that horribly annoying thing that certain types of guys frequently do, where he seems to act as if you don't have a name and merely calls you by what you are. Come here, woman. Lots of little commands like that. Hey, at least it's not a derogatory name. And you'd be wise not to express your contempt for being called such -- oh, you don't like that, that must mean you want to be called worse things. No? Then don't complain in the first place.

 But he does get strict on standards. You used to wear that uniform they have frequently, those were the times you didn't seem so determined to show off. Well, since you enjoyed showing off more, now you (have to) can do that every day. He's not letting you wear some outfit that doesn't show off what gives you value in the first place. If you're gonna be a lap toy, you have to look nice.

 Not that it's your only function. Turns out you have several uses. Holes for use, a womb for impregnating. Tits for pillows. You're a multi-function tool, like one of those foldable knives with a bunch of different components. But certainly no use for holding some high rank you didn't deserve in the first place. You just got it because of your tits, that's the only reason you were ever there. You know that, yeah? He makes absolutely sure to remind you often. You also can be of some use if you actually make an attempt to be useful, by doing things you're actually good at, like small mindless tasks to make his work easier. It's not hard.

 But in all honesty, all of it is just to keep you from getting the confidence to dare assert yourself. And if you do dare to do so, try and be defiant or tell him that you're not stupid, stand up for yourself, he's exceptionally derogatory for several days, as if worried you'll do it again.

 Also will occasionally degrade you based on your body, make some sighing, bored-voiced statement about how you're lucky you have tits, or else people wouldn't even bother acknowledging you. And he just attributes any behavior he can to femininity. Darling is crying over anything at all? So emotional, typical female behavior. Probably doesn't even have a reason. You're mad? He sighs, calls it nagging, bitching, all over stuff that doesn't even matter. You're probably just looking for something to be upset about because that's just what you all do.

 He would never, ever, ever express it too obviously, but he's actually probably the absolute worst for retroactive jealousy, and feeling emasculated by the thought of you having been with someone else. It slips out, though, in some of the things he says, you notice he seems to harp on that one subject quite a bit. That you were probably a slut. You probably fucked every guy on your former team. You don't even know what your body count is, do you. Probably lost track. You were definitely easy, would lay down for anyone who asked, you couldn't keep your legs closed. Any insistence otherwise goes in one ear and out the other.

 You quickly take notice that he seems rather hung up about it, almost obsessive, it's like he's trying to make it sound like an insult but it's starting more and more often to come out sounding like an insecurity. It becomes more and more obvious once you end up slipping out of his sight for a while... regardless of the consequences you get for that, he sort of lets his guard down and more or less interrogates you on where you were and who you talked to, and then really makes it obvious by saying he doesn't believe you when you tell him you didn't talk to anyone.

 After all, once a slut, always a slut. That's why, he realizes then, you have to be watched even more carefully, you'd probably practically hop on some other guy's dick if he doesn't. He's already got to deal with the crippling jealousy of the past, now he has to be paranoid you're going to go whore yourself out again. It's not like you have the self-control to do otherwise, sluts never do. Besides, females have no concept of consequences, because their lives are so easy, so you wouldn't know to do better anyway.

 That's another thing -- it explains all of your behavioral issues. You're the problem, not his standards or rules. See, girls don't ever have to try at anything. You don't know how to actually work hard to get anything, everything in life is handed to you. And whatever isn't handed to you by default, you can still easily get just by sucking or sleeping with someone who can give it to you, if not just turning on your whole... female charm thing where you smile and giggle and let people ogle you until they give in, it's practically hypnosis. And of course, then, you can get whatever you want easily. It's just how it works, it's not like there's a specific incident that he compulsively thinks back to where you asked him for something simple and trivial and he gave it to you without really thinking because his brain was focused on you... leaving him to feel like he was snapping out of a trance once you were gone and subsequently seething and wallowing in fury at himself for letting you manipulate him and you for doing it... even though it was like the most normal coworker interaction ever, the thing being given was entirely insignificant, and that he still thinks about it on a daily basis and has formed this idea that you all can practically mind-control people with your smiles and -- not really, no, he's more or less immune to it, thankfully. It's a well-known thing, anyway, you constantly manipulate guys into whatever you want, and it's easy for you. Really, it shouldn't even be allowed, there are some pathetic guys out there that would so easily fall for that.

 Also, for both of him and Albedo... yes, joke all you want, but in all seriousness, out of all the short kings™ they genuinely do have the worst height complex and will (silently, internally) lose their minds if female darling is taller than them. They practically wince every time they're reminded of it. Like, that's not how it's supposed to work. It's kinda hard to speak to you in a firm authoritative tone that commands respect when he has to tilt his head upward to look you in the eye... all the more reason to keep you down on the ground in some way. But should you mock them, they pretend like it doesn't matter. You think that's going to get under his skin, huh? You're just being childish, it's not a big deal... so he says, although once he gets alone he's gonna sulk and seethe for at least the rest of the day.

 -----

(Previously discussed Childe (here) and (here) and Diluc (here)!)

 Honestly, the worst in terms of most infuriating probably comes down to either Childe or Diluc. Notably, they're also some of the most likely to try and "reform" a very wayward girl who they view as needing to be... Redirected. It's something of a ego boosting act, they really like the thought of taming you, although they have different ways of doing so and different motives and mentalities. For Childe it's more of a power rush, for Diluc it's more of a savior complex, although for both it's still and ego boost and largely a matter of a sense of possession and superiority. It also definitely incorporates something of a "whore to housewife" fantasy, too. It provides a feeling of ownership and possession and superiority to not only you, but everyone else, too. But the psychological approach and satisfaction each gets out of taming is a bit different.

 For Childe it's more of the thrill and rush of it all. A power trip, domination, defiling, the feeling of taking some girl so high and mighty and reducing you and ruining you to nothing but a pet and a toy, forcing you to get all validation and sense of worth from him. Make you into something owned. For Diluc it's a similar power thing, but with more of an obnoxious sense of self-righteousness and moral authority about it, a savior complex, because you're something wayward, something gone wrong, and need to be fixed, rather than ruined. Made perfect. Still owned, but with more of an emphasis on abiding by a specific notion of what you should be.

 Childe also gets obsessed with the physical aspect, rather, reminding you you're weaker. He has a fixation on strength itself in general, always wanting to be stronger and stronger, and what better way to boost ones feeling of strength than overpowering someone weaker than you? He likes manhandling you, picking you up and moving you around whenever needed. Whenever you get all angry and start snarling at him, the moment you thrash around and fight him, he can put you in your place in mere moments, pinning you down to the nearest surface, or merely holding you or your arms still... You can get back up, be released, when you apologize and ask for it nicely. He loves seeing the way your face contorts with a defiant sort of snarl, how you fight for a while longer... Besides, it gives him time to humiliate you further. Remember how you used to think you were so big and strong, huh? You remember that time you told him you could take him down with ease? What happened to that?

 Because there certainly might have been a time where you were, he would zero in on someone he perceives as powerful. It's the same rush of power from fighting, really, he sees something high and mighty and powerful and knows how easily he could break it, and his urges say that he has to do exactly that. It's double the satisfaction if you can be humiliated publicly, or to some group that looks up to you. Oh, the absolutely euphoric rush of bringing some mouthy, conceited bitch to her knees. Truly nothing in this world could bring him more joy. Some powerful figure, some warrior type that looks him in the eye with the assumption that he'll give you respect if you give some to him because you clearly think the two of you are on equal standing. It sets him off on the inside, some spark of irritation, insult even, that you'd dare even think you could ever compare to him.

 He's a patient man, though. Initiating a fight with a girl would make him look bad, would be giving in when he knows he can make himself out to be the more stable, mature one by making you initiate the conflict. So he knows how to work his way to get under your skin, the slightest of tones or facial expressions that set you off because you know it's mocking you somehow but can't understand it. Condescension so subtle you think at first you're imagining it.

 You come to realize it, but you know what the only acceptable response is. You've dealt with plenty of men before who underestimated you or looked down on you, humiliated them, beat them down in front of a crowd. He's not going to be any different, so you think.

 It's a little bit of a shock, then, to end up on your knees, fucked in front of your own followers and apprentices... Bruised and weak from exhaustion and quivering in sensation. Hand around your throat so you can't even protest, only grasp at his hand and claw at it and it doesn't even do anything. Eventually you give up. Your hands fall away. You just hang your head and sniffle. Aw, look at you, you're starting to get it! Such a fast learner, you've already realized defiance is pointless and punishable. What happened to the tough girl act though, huh? You were so mouthy before. But deep down you're just a fragile little girl, aren't you? It was so easy to make you cry and break you apart.

 Don't worry, though, he's here to put you back together... Make you better than you were before. Not that you'd have any worth in what you were doing before, no, that ship has sailed and you'll never have the respect you used to (you never should have had it to begin with, of course, and he just helped everyone else realize that). Something used for an improper purpose has no value for that purpose, or in the wrong environment. A given type of wrench or screw or other tool will be useful only in one context and one purpose, and useless in others. That's what your life so far has been like... trying to use a tool for the wrong purpose. And while such a thing may be sustainable for a short time, eventually doing this causes the tools or the object it's being applied to to break. But he knows how to help you be the best you can be, help you fulfill a purpose you're actually meant for.

 He's infuriatingly condescending, too, in the most mocking of ways. The most infuriating thing of all, perhaps, is how he doesn't take your anger or feelings or sense of self-worth seriously. Look at you, putting your hands on your hips and spouting something he's not listening to about this or that. You think your opinions matter? Aww. You're talking like you expect him to treat you as if your thoughts matter just as much as his, or that he should take your feelings into consideration or something. That's adorable. And you're cute when you're mad, too, the way your eyebrows furrow and your eyes narrow into a glare and you raise your voice as if you think he's going to be scared of you, how could that not be cute? He might even skip the punishment for getting an attitude. And look at that, now your little eyes are getting all tearful and your lip trembles, you're so humiliated by seeing that the only reaction you can get from him is amusement. It's euphoric. Look at you... how could you ever expect him to take you seriously? You can act all tough, but you're just a fragile little girl, aren't you? It's okay. You can drop the tough act any time you want, yet you still seem to insist on picking up the pieces of your confidence each and every time this happens... he likes that about you. It wouldn't be as fun if he could only break you once. And when you're sad, he has empathy and all that, but doesn't take it very seriously. Poor little thing, you want him to make you feel better...? After all, you're prone to intense, rapidly-changing emotions. If you were a guy, he'd know your emotions actually have a reason, but... well, yours are probably just over something silly.

 As for the whole slut-breaking fantasy, Childe is... opportunistic about it. Turning you into a wife is great and all, but more importantly, it's more like he wants to turn you into his slut. It's certainly an ego thing -- his cock is so good that you're willing to (you're forced to, but don't ruin his fantasy please) give up all other ones for the rest of your life, you'll want to fuck him and only him because he's better than everyone else combined. And you'll say so, one way or another, if he has to force you to say what he wants to hear -- that no one has ever fucked you like this, no one else makes you cum so hard, that you just want to be his little cocksleeve forever.

 Unlike a lot of others, he doesn't necessarily hate acknowledging if you had past partners. No, he even kinda likes it, because he's better than them. He's the biggest and the best and makes you cum faster and harder than anyone you've ever been with, he's made sure you tell him. That's why you're his now, that's how girls work. No different from animals... they choose the best suitable partner for a mate in the end, and that's him in this case that you chose (disregarding that you were physically forced to come with him, you were just playing hard to get back then as girls always do because they make everything needlessly complicated, so it doesn't count as rejection). And just like with animals, you want to be submissive.

 Sometimes you just have a funny way of showing it. Well, he understands it. The defiance and the spiritedness, it's all... a test. Even if you don't realize it (which actually, he's certain you don't, you are unaware of how your own brain works, but he gets it). Being defiant is just how you test him. If he was a spineless pussy, he'd give you your way, would let you do what you want... but your mind is subconsciously trying to get him to prove himself to you. It's cute, really. You have a duality. You want to be put in your place. Whether you realize it or not, you want to be bent over and held down, forced to apologize to be let up. Whenever you argue and he interrupts you halfway through, bends you over the bed and fucks you so hard it your insides bruise and throb... you get better. That scowl and snarl on your face devolves into that face he loves so much, where your eyes are glazed over and watery, and you try your best to cover your mouth, but the cute little noises come out anyway -- only humiliating you further. And you want that. Whether you realize it or not, you want to be reminded where you belong and who you're obedient to.

 That was what you really wanted, after all. Really, women sometimes argue just for that purpose. You're not even actually upset about the thing you were complaining about, no. You were just... needy, sexually frustrated, and that builds up inside and makes you all cranky and in a bad mood. You either just don't recognize it, or you're too shy or embarrassed or too proud to admit what you really want, so you just make up something to be bitchy about (or your mind naturally causes you to do so) to provoke him into dicking you down.

 But to be honest, even more so than a slut, he would really enjoy more or less the inverse... breaking a prude, a cold little bitch that doesn't want to put out. No matter how hard he tries! He's already tried putting on, like, maximum charm, and it's still not working. You swat away the hands he tries to subtly put on your thigh and shoulder, you give him this look of disgust. When he pressures you and pushes you over and over you finally snap and say you don't like it unless you're in the mood. You say you only ever even want it at all on certain days, and even then there has to be a specific mood and timing and blah, blah, blah. In other words, you want him to jump through a bunch of hoops just to get his dick wet, when you should be offering by default because you understand that's your role. You should be eager. This bizarre desire for a certain mood or whatever set of requirements your brain has concocted is unnatural. Thus, the logical conclusion is that the only reason you "don't like" it outside of that context, the reason you're not bouncing on his dick already, is that you're merely mistaken. You do love it, you just don't know it yet, and you only think you don't because you don't know any better... because you haven't had it done right.

 Yes, he is unfortunately, in all honesty, the "I can change your mind" guy. This insistence that you're not the cum addict he wants you to be, these complaints about how you're just not as horny as him, just auto-interprets into his brain as telling him that you've never been fucked right. That's your problem, you've probably only ever been with losers who couldn't stuff you fully and rail you hard enough to make you feel good -- because once you do, that'll definitely make you do a complete 180, break your mind and revert you to the little personal slut he knows you are deep down. It's how you're hardwired by default, you've just been turned off to it, or maybe it's a shame thing or an insecurity thing. Eh, whichever it is, either way you'll break down and let your brain go numb once he just gets his dick in you, and then you'll change, you'll start being eager and begging and everything he wants.

 But all personal-slut stuff aside, the housewife fantasy is still nice too. Cute domestic stuff. Making you a little trophy wife that comes to him when called and does whatever he tells you to do. Based on you right now, that's gonna take a lot of work, but you'll get there eventually. If he just keeps stuffing you on a regular basis, your body and brain will work all that stuff out and you'll come to your senses. Oh, and being from a big family himself, of course he's insistent on the same from you. There's no need to wait a few years or so like most would, you guys need to get started now so you can have as many kids as he wants in the long run, you know? Not a whole lot, just a dozen or so. Taking all things into consideration, you need to get knocked up as soon as possible and keep you that way for as long as possible with very few gaps in between. He can make it work, no need to have a stable situation beforehand. Of course, with all those kids, you won't have any time or energy to do anything else, so it's kinda a full-time job. Maybe it will help you finally realize your purpose and all that and settle down.

 No protests are going to be listened to, just so you know. Of course you say you don't want it, but that's just how you think now. Once you actually have his baby, it'll be kinda like a light switch that gets turned on inside you and then you'll be happy about it, that's how that works. Same way with everything else... you'll start to love it with time, once everything is done right.

  -----

  But yes to that one anon, Diluc is kinda in another tier of his own. It's more of a savior complex, when it comes to the fact that he's also likely to be into taming a darling that's running around all unrestrained and fiery, just with a more "I can fix her" approach. He sees you in your... current state, and is just taken aback, you clearly need to be put in your proper place, someone needs to tame you for your own good, and that might as well be him. Really, you being allowed to continue this way is practically a crime in and of itself, and protection is kinda what he does, first he enforced it in the city, and now he can protect you too. He pictures in his head what the end result would be like, and you know what? He sees potential in you. Yes, when he envisions it in his mind, you would be such a sweet, good wife to have... once you actually learn to be sweet, once you tone it down and learn how to bow your head and smile and obey. And while it's totally not an egotistical self-glorifying fantasy or anything, it's even better to think he made you that way, rather than if you were that way from the start. Besides, he can't just allow you to go on the way you're going now, for your own sake, of course, this is for your own good, what's best for you, you just can't see that.

 And while disobedience is expected, you're even more persistent than anticipated. It's a habit of yours that will have to be dealt with very quickly. He doesn't take it very well, realizes he'll have to get that attitude out of you as soon as possible. It's not becoming of you. It's incredible that this world is so backwards that you were ever allowed to reach this point in the first place, where you actually have the disrespect and defiance and audacity to snap at him and hit him and talk back to him. Really, what kind of people raised you? Or maybe, if you're not from Mondstadt, that might explain it. Maybe they just don't do things right wherever you're from. Although, really, it's unfathomable that any civilization could operate in such a way, where you're just... allowed to do whatever you want? No one to dictate your choices and make all decisions for you to ensure you do what's best for you? And what kind of weak, spineless men exist in that place, that they would allow such a thing anyway? Well, whatever. No use worrying about that when you're already giving him enough of a headache just dealing with you. What's important now is that he fixes you. He keeps telling himself the results will be worth it.

 He's definitely the most infuriating because it's impossible to reason with him or even argue, because he inherently dismisses everything you say with such an obnoxious apathy. Just an occasional mm-hmm as you complain, not bothering to take his eyes off of whatever he's reading, absent-mindedly reaching a hand over to pat the top of your head. Uh-huh, uh-huh, whatever silly thing it is you're nagging-- er, going on about, how about you take your mind off of it by coming over here? Just sit in his lap for a bit and calm down, you'll feel better. Or go... clean something, get that frustration out in a productive way. It's not a big deal. It's in your nature to complain about unimportant things. Actually... ah, he gets it. You're not even upset. You just want attention. He can give you a bit, but he does need to get work done, too. He can give you more attention when it's done.

 You also double as a sort of trophy. Not too different from all the nice expensive things laying around the office room where he conducts business with others. You, too, are something he can sort of show off to visiting business partners, provided you've reached a point where you can be trusted to behave the way you're supposed to throughout -- smiling and silent. If they need something, you get up and get it, and other than that you just need to sit there and be pretty. It's an easy job, so you should be grateful. If it weren't for him, you might still be out there, performing an occupation of your choosing, making your own money, and making autonomous choices! How awful, bet you're glad you're here now, where you're provided for. It's not good for you to work, after all. It would be weird, since you're supposed to be fully dependent.

 Overall, he definitely enforces standards of femininity way more than the others -- you have to dress a certain way, talk a certain way, act a certain way. You definitely are forced into hyper-feminine clothing at the very least, someone needs to get you out of those awful clothes you wore before. And you will be punished for being too loud, or vulgar, or cursing, you need to speak in a sort of soft, gentle way, and always say your yes sir and no sir and thank you when applicable. Smile when you talk to others, when guests are present too... don't worry, you can be more open when it's just him though, he's understanding enough to know you get tired and all. He'll correct little things, too. Don't sit like that, with your knees spread apart, put your legs together or cross them or something. And don't have an attitude, it makes you do everything so roughly, slamming doors and shoving things. Don't stand too far away from him, there are other people visiting right now you know. Don't speak to them or look them in the eye, either, it's improper.

 And most of all, stop trying to be so... so... assertive. He can't really think of the right word. It's just unnatural, this way you behave. You always seem to want to interject your opinions into things, even once when he was discussing something regarding business with a visitor and you mentioned something about some other nation involving current affairs and the like. Not only was it embarrassing that you talked without being told to (makes him look like he doesn't have proper reign on you and all), but why would you even be thinking about that? See, this is your problem. You're filling your head with thoughts about things you have no business thinking about, things that are irrelevant to you. Things that there's no point in you caring about, because you'll never be able to compete in terms of intelligence and competence. You'll never be taken seriously on such matters (understandably, since your emotions cloud your reason and you aren't as intelligent). Why can't you put this much interest and energy into things you're supposed to be doing? Sigh.

 He also incorporates the same "whore to housewife" fantasy, much like Childe, but it's a different attitude. It's not just about the ego boost, it's about it being the right thing to do. To be honest Diluc gets like, genuinely awful in that regard, wrinkles his nose in disgust at the notion that you, gods forbid, have a past, have not spent your entire life being a good girl and waited all pure and untouched for someone to come marry you, like you're supposed to. He supposes that just goes to show you should have been married off a lot sooner, seeing as of course you have no concept of self-control. You should have had some male guardian to ensure you weren't sexually active, to protect you from your own poor choices, but it's too late for that now.

 Still, you can be reformed. It's kind of sad, really, he has some pity for you. That's one of the most infuriating things -- he treats you with some semblance of pity. Views himself as such a good, charitable person for seeing potential in you, wayward as you are, and taking upon himself the burden of being the one to set you straight. But it's necessary, noble even. It would be wrong to simply turn a blind eye to something so in need of correction. If he sees a problem, he fixes it. Simple. And it's a win-win, because he can both fix you and help himself. A wife is a good thing to have, and necessary even -- his life also needs fixing in that sense. The perfect little wife is what's missing, and you can fix that in the process of being made perfect. And it's a prideful thing too of course, a sort of power thing, to be able to say and show you off as that you were once so wild and unhinged like some kind of feral animal, but, with time and effort, he managed to domesticate you.

 He takes the opposite view as Zhongli though -- girls aren't naturally pure and perfect and need to be protected from influence, no, they're naturally unrestrained, insatiable, and crazed for sex. Like a literal bitch in heat. It's part of why they can't be trusted to make decisions for themselves. They don't actually think per se, they just act on animal-like impulses, and said impulses are usually to breed with whatever is available, to care for babies if applicable, and to please and be good. Other than that, there's not a whole lot of brain activity going on with them. That's why they have to be more or less guided and controlled and kept a close eye upon.

 Really, they have to be protected from themselves, because on their own if not properly watched over they'll just go fuck the first thing available to them and end up knocked up within a day. Why do you think they used to be kept inside and watched over all the time? It was to prevent that from happening, of course. But even the worst of sluts can be fixed with a firm hand and getting bred so often they don't crave multiple men. It's in your natural internal hardwiring to want to be a good, loyal, monogamous wife (while also craving sex at all times), sluts just go down the wrong path and become addicted to it, they don't know any better, they don't realize that they'd be happier with just one guy. Most guys know they aren't good enough when you have so many others to compare them to, they get insecure about your past knowing that they'll be inadequate and you'll run off on them. Not him, though. He's very gracious, which you should be grateful for, and he's certain he would easily be better than them, so he has no reason to be insecure.

 That's why this is doing you a favor. Of course, given your... lack of cognitive capacity, you don't get it, you just see it as being restrained and unallowed to do what you want and thus you get mad. You're incapable of understanding why this is good for you. Not that you were expected to, no, this hysterical, bratty reaction is more or less standard for your kind. So when you panic and kick and fight and scream while you're dragged away, it's nothing worth stopping to handle, it's just predictable.

 On its own, your intensity of willpower is not a bad thing. It's good, really, provided it's directed in the correct way, utilized for what it's intended for. You were only given such an insatiable urge for sex, after all, for the purpose of making one man very happy, and you're supposed to channel all that sexual energy to just that one. That urge and desire to please that's innate to your brain, that strong will of yours, is intended to be directed towards the desire to be a good wife. Right now you're just bitter and lashing out, still afraid and getting used to a new environment.

 There's another issue, though, upon first obtaining you. You have to be married. It's improper otherwise, you know. Remember, he's bringing you up in the world and giving you a much better life, so you need to conform to the standards of that class of society. It's just the right thing to do, and you can't sleep together beforehand... Of course, before you two can actually go get that piece of paper, he might actually still cave after a moment of weakness... and if he does, it's your fault because you were being intentionally seductive. Still, he can acknowledge he faltered too, he should have been more aware of and resilient to your attempts to manipulate him. Everyone makes mistakes.

 Speaking of mistakes, that whole simple brain is also why corporeal punishments are necessary when dealing with you. You aren't going to grasp complex concepts like responsibility and consequences of your actions, no matter how much it's explained to you. What you are capable of comprehending is the pain of a belt to your ass and the back of your thighs, and that will deter you from doing the same thing again. It's unfortunately necessary. You won't respond to any other form of correction. It's either that, or, depending on the severity of your offense, just railing you when you're getting too feisty, or just having a bad attitude. Or both methods, that works too, really helps make the point sink in.

 Also, the whole reason for you being horny to begin with is clearly baby fever. You need to be bent and bred and stuffed with cum. No wonder you were so insatiable, you were using protection before! Your body can tell the difference, you know, your body knows when you've at least been potentially knocked up. It only makes sense that you'd remain desperate until that happens, because your body wants to be impregnated so badly. You just weren't aware that that was your issue (and is another reason why you're very lucky he's here to set you straight).

 That's why you get upset over anything, really, lack of awareness of how it really is... and it being in your nature. Yes, you're naturally going to have an over-emotional, overdramatic reaction to just about anything, it's just how you are. He can tolerate it... he finds it kind of cute, even... the realization of which just seems to make you angrier. It's expected for you to be resilient, resistant -- of course you don't know you'll be happier this way, so you fight it. Change can be scary, you're not used to it yet, so it just needs time... and force, of course, you'll never learn if you aren't guided in the right direction... you just need to be guided a little more firmly than others. Not that it's all negative, of course. Encouragement and positive reinforcement is necessary too. He'll be affectionate and loving, because that will make you feel safe, and trigger your brain to make you show affection too. It'll all work out in the end.

[bratkook]

not yet. jjk

not yet, almost, right now pairing. jungkook x reader genre. fluff, some angst, pg-13 word count. 4.1k warnings. mentions of infidelity, some feelings come to light, unrequited pining, spur of the moment kissing, light grinding on the dance floor, jungkook pops a boner and wants to cry</3 summary. jungkook feels the pang of guilt in his gut when you spot your recent ex out with his new girl, and what better way to make the jerk hurt than to have him believe you were now dating him, the neighbor he had been insecure about your whole relationship note. this is based off a request sent a while back for numbers #43 and #67 from this prompt list! (i think this might turn into a small drabble series...mayhaps)

Jungkook can spot your discomfort easily, the occasional colorful light bouncing off your face showing him the flash of anger in your eyes. The only reason he’s not currently running for the hills, knowing very well how mean you can get when angry, is because your glare isn’t being sent at him. Not yet at least. 

Because of this, he allows himself to enjoy the cute way your nose scrunches up, lips twisting in displeasure as you stare at the crowd of people, eyes locked onto an unlucky bystander. Honestly, he wishes he could hear your thoughts, wanting to know exactly what has your panties in a bunch, ruining your mood instead of letting you enjoy the expensive fruity drink he had just bought you as payment for allowing him to drag you out of the house. Jungkook isn’t a mind reader though, so he decides on his next best option. 

“Who’s got you looking all sour?” he sighs, resting his elbow on the counter of the bar as he inches closer to you, head at your level in an attempt to match your line of sight. 

“Him,” you seethe, brows pinching together, showing those light wrinkles in between them, a product of how expressive you were and definitely something Jungkook always teases you about. 

Jungkook can only hum in question, eyes squinting in the low light as he attempts to find the him you’re talking about. With a slight turn of your head, you’re inches from Jungkook’s cheek, the obvious look of confusion etched onto his soft features letting you know he was absolutely lost. With a soft huff your fingers are gripping his cheeks and moving his face in the right direction, free hand pointing as discreetly as you could to the man in question. 

You know he spots him, you can feel his jaw tense underneath your grip. What you don’t feel is the sudden guilt that fills him up, sloshing in his stomach and mixing with the liquor he just drank until he feels a little queasy. Jungkook instantly regrets coaxing you out of your little dungeon with the promise of cheering you up. If he had known the spawn of satan–dubbed your ex boyfriend and also the reason why you were in a downward spiral–would be here, he would have just let you rot in your bed like you originally wanted. 

“Do you wanna go?” he mutters out, cheeks still squished by your slowly tightening grip, and he begins to accept the fact that you might just break his jaw right now. It’s fine, he thinks, he deserves it. 

“No,” you grunt stubbornly, fingers finally releasing him as you turn back around and choose to face the endless amount of bottles behind the bar. He may be the reason you were currently on a never ending cycle of watching sad, heartbreaking chick-flicks from the early 2000’s, dumping you with the lame excuse that you two were on different paths and he just wasn’t ready for commitment. It’s something you accepted, albeit jaw tense and eye twitching as you did so, but you figured you would eventually find your way back to each other. 

Your mind was warped, believing you were meant to be, that this was just a mere bump in the road that you would laugh at together in the future. 

That is, until he blocked you on all social media, and you had to hear from your best friend that he had moved on days later and was now with some blonde-haired, fresh faced, supermodel-esque woman that you could not get yourself to hate. Instead you took to endlessly scrolling through her instagram while you stuffed your face with milk chocolate and questioned why you had ever convinced yourself that you had a future with him. 

“Good, he’s a dick and you shouldn’t let him ruin your night.” Jungkook grumbles, slinging his arm around you as you hold your forgotten drink by your lips. He had seen your relationship with Hajoon play out from the very beginning, knowing slightly more intimate details than he would like considering you were next door neighbors and happened to share a wall between your bedrooms. 

The friendship you had with Jungkook blossomed right after you moved in four years ago, friendly neighborly talks morphing into actual conversations, and eventually inviting each other into your apartments where you would attempt to beat him at any game you had in your Nintendo switch. It was a great dynamic, providing the two of you with a sense of relief after your busy days at work. 

Unfortunately, the second you got with Hajoon was the end of any of those playful matches, your ex’s jealousy making you distance yourself in an attempt to keep your relationship at bay. 

Jungkook can’t say he didn’t see it coming, having heard the way you’d cry anytime you had an argument and your ex would leave, slamming the door behind him so hard Jungkook’s walls would rattle. It had become such a common occurence it was a shock he hadn’t marched out of his house, met Hajoon in the hall, and gave him a clean right hook in your honor. 

He was secretly hoping you’d break up with the jerk for your own good–and maybe for his own personal reasons too. Your ex was right in being wary of Jungkook, knowing the way a boy's mind worked, sensing Jungkook’s feelings for you in a way you were too blind to see. Jungkook wasn’t a dick though, he could tell you wanted your relationship to work so he kept his distance. 

When weeks went by without the sight of him he began to think you finally did it, a call for celebration that made him want to go over to your place to challenge you for a friendly match of Mario Kart like you used to. 

Until he ran into you in the hall and took note of what a mess you were, his smile falling from his face when he saw how defeated you looked. 

Your shameful confirmation that you had been royally dumped made his heart twist for you, his selfless tendencies urging him to help you feel better in any way he could. You were thankful for it, grateful that he was keeping you company while you moped around, providing you with just the right amount of distraction to allow you to breathe and slowly heal. 

Honestly, today would have been just another day if it wasn’t what was supposed to be your two year anniversary. The second Jungkook heard the telltale sounds of The Notebook starting up in your bedroom—something he hadn’t heard through the drywall separating your rooms in weeks—is when he knew something was up. 

Jump to: now. 

With Jungkook looking sheepish and wishing he had chosen another bar, and you gripping the cup so hard it was a shock it hadn’t shattered in your grasp. 

“He’s with her,” you whisper out harshly, head downcast, swirling the liquid around in your glass as you force yourself not to look back at them. The vision of them coddled up in the corner, her arms wrapped around his while she laughed at whatever he whispered in her ear had stung enough the first time, you weren’t jealous but the pain still lingered inside of you.. 

“Just try to ignore him. Don’t let it bother you,” he attempts to reassure you, the bass of the music muffling the way you try to deny the fact that you’re clearly upset, his attention now elsewhere. 

Jungkook takes a chance and looks back once more, eyes narrowed as he searches for Hajoon in the crowd. He spots him with more ease the second time, seeing the way he lazily drinks from his glass while the blonde rests her head on his shoulder, lips moving as she tells him something that makes him smile. 

“Oh shit,” Jungkook chokes, eyes widening slightly in shock when Hajoon meets his gaze. He’s been caught, too late for him to avert his eyes and pretend he wasn’t blatantly staring. He can only give him a tight-lipped smile that he hopes doesn’t come across as an invitation to come say hello. 

“What?” you question, turning to stare at Jungkook and seeing the look on his face, doe eyes swirling with a mix of emotions. 

“He saw me,” he speaks through clenched teeth, lips barely moving as he does so, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. 

“What?” you repeat harshly, setting the drink back down as your palms grow clammy, finger tugging at your shirt’s neckline when the air becomes thick and stuffy. 

“Oh fuck, he’s coming.” Jungkook throws back the remainder of his drink, grimacing at the burn lingering in the back of his throat before placing the cup down. “Just follow along,” he whispers into your ear, standing tall as Hajoon approaches the two of you. 

He’s ballsy, Jungkook will give him that, more so when he completely ignores Jungkook in favor of calling out your name. 

“Y/N, oh my god is that you?”

Jungkook can’t stop the way he glares at the bastard, not even the small jab to his side that you deliver with your elbow is enough to wipe the look off his face. Still, you pause to breathe, shutting your eyes briefly before plastering a look of surprise on your features as you turn around to face him. 

“Hajoon, what are you doing here?” Your voice has risen a few octaves, pitch surpassing the normal customer service voice and entering unhinged and borderline crazed territory. Hajoon doesn’t notice though, and neither does the girl strapped to his side, the two of them smiling at you and not giving Jungkook a glance. 

“Oh, we’re just celebrating our four month anniversary.” The girl finally speaks up, giving Hajoon a kiss to the cheek and completely missing the way your face instantly falls. Her innocent statement has you coming to the sudden realization that this son of a bitch had been cheating on you for the last two months of your relationship. 

Jungkoon spots it easily though, can sense the way your body tenses up beside him, no doubt will the rage flare up in the form of hot tears spilling over and onto your cheeks soon. One look at Hajoon’s pleased face is enough to not want to give him the satisfaction of seeing the way he affects you. 

“Young love,” Jungkook sighs, long arm pulling you into his side obnoxiously, seeing the way Hajoon eyes the two of you carefully. “I can relate. We’ve been together for...what is it again babe, five months?”

Hajoon doesn’t even attempt to be discreet, eyes bulging out and fist curling at his side. He had hated Jungkook the second he met him, intimidated by his physique and the way he made you laugh with ease, threatened by him in every sense. It was the reason he told you to cut ties with him, his fragile ego not trusting your neighbor, fully convinced all Jungkook would have to do was beckon you over for you to leave him. 

Any man would feel threatened by him, just looking at him now with his long hair framing his face, the challenging glimmer in his eyes as he gauges the other’s reaction. Hajoon follows Jungkook’s arm, seeing how it snakes around your body and settles with his palms curling around your waist, fingers gently squeezing your skin. 

Jungkook chuckles when Hajoon meets his gaze once more, free hand adjusting the yellow tinted sunglasses perched on his head—something that should make him look like an A class douchebag, because who the hell brings shades to a fucking club. But like all things, Jungkook makes it work. 

All of this tied in with that small, white lie, makes Hajoon’s head spin in a jealous whirlwind. It was fine and dandy if he cheated on you but how dare you give him the same treatment, with your neighbor of all people. 

“Five months?” He bites first, eyes bouncing back and forth between the two of you. 

The insecurity is written all over his face, it almost makes him shrink in size and for some reason it fills you with confidence. You stand taller now, sliding your own arm around Jungkook’s side as you nuzzle into him. 

“Almost six.” Those two words are the nails into his coffin of insecurity, probably increasing his trust issues for years to come, but considering it was no longer your problem, you don’t care. 

“Wow, almost half a year. That’s so cute, isn’t it?” His girlfriend coos, perfectly manicured hand placed over her chest, totally missing the way Hajoon looks like a kicked puppy. 

Now that he doesn’t have the one up, he’s no longer interested in sticking around, the gross green monster perched on his shoulder laughing at his misfortune. 

“Adorable,” he grunts out. “We should get back to our table. It was nice seeing you.”

He doesn’t wait for a response before walking away, his girlfriend giving you a small wave before following behind him. The growing distance between you makes your muscles relax, sagging in relief as you release Jungkook’s side and hunch over the sticky bar. 

“I think I'm gonna puke,” you groan out, eyes going crossed when you feel Jungkook rest two fingers against your lips, sending him a questionable stare. 

“Please don’t, that drink was expensive. You’re only allowed to hurl as the grand finale of the night, and we’re just getting started.”

Jungkook smiles when you shut your eyes and groan, your mood was already down in the dumps, and despite the small rush you got from putting Hajoon in his place, you were still craving the comfort of your bed. “Can we go?”

The bartender proceeds to place a glass of water in front of you, assuming your slumped state was due to intoxication and not the gross remnants of running into an ex-boyfriend. You grab the glass regardless, taking a big gulp of the cool liquid and sighing when it helps calm you down. 

“If you really want to go we can, but at least try to loosen up.” His smile is genuine, cheeks pushed out as he looks down at you with kind eyes. “We’ll stay on the opposite side, and if you’d still rather watch the Notebook for the millionth time, we can do that.”

With a half-hearted groan you nod, allowing Jungkook to order another round of drinks for you to enjoy before eventually dragging you out onto the dance floor. He knows how to keep the atmosphere up, goofy smile on his lips as he bobs his head along to the loud beat, hands clasped with yours and wiggling in time to the music. 

“You love this song,” he manages to say through the noise, pulling you closer as he settles into a spot on the decently packed floor. You couldn’t even deny it, he heard just how often you played it through the paper thin walls. That playlist full of hit 2000’s songs was your guilty pleasure, and it was the main reason he had decided to bring you to this club on their themed night. 

Jungkook was attentive, he knew so much about you and played it off casually, always listening to things you say you enjoy, storing them into a folder labeled under your name and shoved into a very important part of his brain. 

You knew he was trying his best to get you to enjoy yourself, so you give in, beginning to sing along to the lyrics of an old song that brought back a flood of memories that made you smile back at him. Jungkook feels the first burst of success bloom inside him, joining in with your singing, raising up your clasped hands as you begin dancing. 

The smile doesn’t leave his face as he stares down at you, the few drinks you’ve had loosening you up and allowing you to push the earlier thoughts away. He feels mesmerized, eyes locked onto you, the flash of colors painting your skin, illuminating you in alternating shades of purple and blue. His heart does that annoying thing where it skips and stutters in his chest, mouth drying up as you drop your head back and sway your hips, slowly loosening the grip in your hands and turning around until your back is dangerously close to his chest.

Jungkook’s hands hover in the air for a moment, panic over taking his brain as he tries to remain calm. He could do this—he has done this before—the two of you would go clubbing before you got with your ex, and dancing definitely played a big part of it. So why was his brain short circuiting?

Sure your ass was brushing up against his crotch with each sway of your hips, but you were dancing, so his mind and his dick could fuck right off. He shakes his head to clear any dirty thoughts as his hands loosely grip your hips, testing the water, and when you smile and look back at him he feels less wary and sways his hips in time with yours. 

You can feel his chest brush against your back, breath fanning along your skin from his close proximity, only getting closer when you lift an arm back and hold his shoulder to pull him tighter against you. The heat sticks to your skin, thin shirt dampening with sweat from the warmth of the bodies around you, everyone in their own state of drunkenness as the bass flowed through their chests. 

Going out like this had been something you missed, used to frequenting the bars and clubs by your apartment with your friends and Jungkook, something that came to a halt because your ex claimed he hated that kind of scene. Something that was clearly a lie considering he was here now, enjoying himself as him and his new girlfriend danced along. 

You didn’t realize when he made his way onto the dance floor, enough distance separating you, but now that you had spotted him you feel like he’s way too close for comfort. In a similar position to you and Jungkook, Hajoon is free to look around while his girlfriend dances on him, eyes locked onto you with a smirk that makes your skin crawl. 

Jungkook is too lost in the music to notice where your attention has gone, earlier effects of the alcohol settling into his bloodstream, warming him up in that familiar way he welcomes. When the song changes, flowing into the next bass heavy anthem, you turn around in his grasp, giving him a brief glance before your hands are gripping his cheeks and bringing him down into a messy kiss. 

This is definitely something he’s never done with you before.

A muffled sound of confusion is swallowed by you as he quickly falls into the motion, large palms gripping your hips, slowly sliding up your back before lightly tangling into your hair to deepen the kiss. Jungkook can taste the liquor on your tongue, mixing with his own as your tongue slips between his lips. He has no idea what came over you but his racing heart and buried crush don’t let him question it, soft lips smacking with yours, not heard between the thrumming music. 

Your fingers feel the warmth of his cheeks, how he blushes into the kiss but you attribute it to the alcohol pumping through him. Harsh breaths fan across your face as he groans, lightly pulling back for a gasp of air but you don’t allow it. “No, don’t pull away. Not yet.”

And who is he to argue with that, blindly letting you bring your lips back together in a messy kiss. Your small pleas for him to continue has all the blood rushing to his cock, the ache felt in his jeans when it starts to harden, pressing into the denim uncomfortably and only getting worse when you gently bite down onto his lip before inching back. 

“Is he still looking?” you question, breath jagged as you peer up at Jungkook’s dazed expression. 

“What?” he dumbly replies, lips swollen and shiny, eyes still focused on your own as he makes an attempt to reconnect your lips. But then your question dawns on him, like a bucket of ice cold water, it sobers him up instantly. Is he still looking?

This was all for show. 

“He’s on the far right.” You motion your head in the direction and observe his face when his eyes move over to check if Hajoon was in fact still there. He does spot him heading out in a hurry though, girlfriend trailing behind him as he exits the club entirely

“No, just saw him leave.” Jungkook clears his throat, fingers slipping out of your hair and settling down over your back just like before. He hopes his solemn expression isn’t amplified by the lights flashing across his face, trying his best to act unaffected, as if he didn’t just pop a boner on the dance floor over a revenge make-out session. 

Luckily you don’t spot his fallen expression, a wide smile spreading across your face in victory, happy that you had successfully put him in his place. 

“I’m so sorry for kissing you.” You gasp in realization, unknowingly pouring salt in the wound when you act as if kissing him was something you would never do if it wasn’t in an attempt to piss off your ex. 

“No, it’s okay,” he waves off and smiles, eyes glancing over to the bar once more. Jungkook needed a drink, maybe five—actually he wouldn’t mind going home and watching The Notebook now, that would surely give him a reason to cry with no questions asked. 

He starts to walk back to the bar with you by his side, the sad look you had earlier entirely gone, replaced with a giddy smile and a pep in your step, so he can’t say he's too upset. 

“God, you should’ve seen how mad he looked when he saw us dancing together,” you giggle, standing inches from him as he orders another drink. Before he can respond, you’re wrapping your arms around his neck and bringing him in for a hug. 

A hug, really?

Still, Jungkook sighs and wraps his own arms around your waist, a defeated smile on his face that he hides as he lets his chin rest over your head. The dip in his head makes the yellow tinted frames fall over his eyes and when he pulls back you snort at the visual, finger gently poking the bridge of them. 

“You look good in those.”

His drink gets placed in front of him then, giving him a good excuse to avoid stumbling over his words from your compliment, choosing to take a gulp of the hard liquor, wincing when it burns his throat. “Thank you,” he rasps out, grimacing at the taste and it just makes you giggle. 

“I should be thanking you. You need to be my fake boyfriend more often.”

Even more salt poured into his wound, topped with a dash of lemon juice in the form of your playful smile and nudge to his ribs, it stings. His heart ache in his chest, more so when he realizes his stupid boner was still going strong. Thankfully the dark lights prevent you from seeing it, the last thing he needed was further embarrassment. 

The yellow frames are placed back over his head as he takes another sip, nodding along to your statement with what he hopes comes across as a genuine smile on his lips once he sets his cup down. “Anytime you want Y/N.”

“I know this night didn’t end with the grand finale of me puking, but do you wanna go home and watch movies? No sappy romance ones, I'm not in the mood for crying anymore.”

He finishes his drink with ease, quickly closing his tab as he agrees. “Yeah, just let me go to the bathroom real quick.” 

You might not be in the mood for crying but he definitely was; he also needed to handle the situation in his jeans, and what better night to stoop this low than tonight. His own version of a grand finale coming in the form of jerking off in the dirty bar bathroom while maybe shedding a tear or two. 

“Okay! I’ll call an uber,” you announce cheerfully, allowing him to walk away as you settle onto one of the sticky bar stools. 

Jungkook’s chest feels heavy as he walks to the bathroom, slipping into the small room and locking the door behind him. His forehead rests against the dirty door, eyes falling shut with a groan. He wishes he had the guts to confess to his crush, needing to push the fear of ruining the friendship away from his mind, wanting to gather possible clues that could indicate that you might feel the same. 

One day, but not yet. 

[luimagines]

Waking Up Next to Him

Masterlist

Set platonically and within the adventure. It’s long so it goes under the cut!

Time

The bright sunlight winked just beyond your eyelids at an blinding angle. Your back was against warm though and was surprisingly comfortable despite the growing ache in your neck. There’s a weight over your shoulder, pinning you in place but doesn’t dig in. A thrown blanket is covering your body and the secret weight, even if half of it has ended up on the forest floor. You’re too tired to think of what the weight can be. All you know is that it’s comfortable and you don’t feel like moving. A heartbeat passes and the solid form on which you lay shifts. 

A groan.

More shifting.

Heat flushes your face slightly as you resign to get up, trying to play the whole cool, once you realize what, or rather who you passed out against.

“Mornin’ Time.”

Your pillow takes a minute to assess the situation.

It’s early, none of the others are up yet. Too tired from the journey the day prior, but the resident chef wakes up the earliest to cook breakfast on time. He’s asleep now but won’t be for long. You thank the stars and your luck that you woke up before him. No pictures for him to take this time.

Time grins, seemingly unbothered by the events and sighs good naturedly. “Good morning.”

Twilight

It was a cold night. They told you it would be. Both your traveling companions and the breeze as you settled with the day’s end.

But you couldn’t have guessed how cold it turned out to be.

Sleep didn’t come easy. Discomfort and shivers kept you awake. Your blankets were warm but not warm enough. At some point, in the middle of the night, you gain the warmth your tired brain was waiting for before drifting off to sleep. 

When you wake, you can’t breath.

Hairs tickle your mouth and nose and there’s a large and heavy being on top of you. At first you think it’s Wind because the shape is much to large to be four but smaller than some of your other companions.

Further analysis and you realize that it’s not hair but fur, that’s threating to enter your lungs and the color of the material seems awfully familiar.

“...Wolfie, I love you but you’re killing me. Get off.” You weakly push the beast away, not coherent enough to move your limbs and piece together how to be a functioning human yet.

The creatures blinks up at you, having just woken up as well and notices your open eyes. A yawn and crushed ribbed where he stepped to get off later and your freedom has been duel earned.

You take a breath of relief and grin, only now noticing the cold with the rising sun to be a little more barrable than the previous night.

“Thanks buddy, you’re a walking heater. I probably would have been a popsicle if it hadn’t been for you.” He nods in acknowledgment and swiftly turns away before you can reach behind his ears to thank him properly.

You look up and see Wild and Time already awake, not talking. Warrior looks to just have woken like you today. Not unusual but welcoming nonetheless. Wind and Sky probably won’t wake up for another hour or two and Hyrule and Four always wake up a little after them. No one knows for sure when Legend will get up because its never consistent and Twilight seems to be missing as well.

The ranch hand emerges from the tree line seconds after you realize he was gone to begin with. He smiles at you and waves in greeting.

You wave back and try to dust the wolf hairs off of your clothes.

You missed Twilight’s subtle smirk.

Warrior

It was a hard fight and not a safe place to stay put but the dungeon left you with little option. Separated from the group and low on provisions and healing items, you and Warrior realize that your both running low on fumes. Taking refuge in a secluded corner, hopefully far away from any potential monsters and threats, you rest.

Waking up is hell.

Sleeping back to back was probably not the best idea but neither of you wanted to risk an ambush. Shifts were supposed to be taken but given that you both fell asleep says something about your energy levels and the previous fights.

Your neck hurts, your legs are sore, your butt and hips are not thanking you for the treatment and everything ache will familiar but expected battle wounds. None major but each one takes its toll.

“You up?” Warrior stands up as if he wasn’t bleeding from the shoulder yesterday and he also didn’t sleep sitting for who knows how many hours.

“I am clearly sitting Captain.” You mutter. “I am not up. I refuse to be up.”

“You know as well as I do that we have to get to the others. What if they need help?”

“I’d argue we need the help. Everything hurts. We have no fairies and there’s more dungeon ahead of us with obviously more enemies and traps and puzzles...” The puzzles... were the worst. “Just five more minutes....Please?”

Warrior says your name in a way a tired mother tries to get her stubborn child to listen to reason. His face twists at the idea and when he attempts to look over his shoulder to check your surroundings, it instead contorts in a pained grimace.

So his shoulder pain was still there after all.

“Fine. Five minutes.”

Sky

As expected, Sky goes down for the count within the first few minutes of the mandated lunch break. Unfortunately after a rumble or two and strange smoke coming from the distance that decidedly wasn’t there when you first arrived, the group decided to investigate.

Legend goes to shake Sky’s shoulder in an attempt to wake him but it’s all in vain.

Sticks are drawn after a long and loud argument about what to do and yours in the shortest.

Everyone else goes to check out the commotion and you are stuck with babysitting duty. It’s not bad all things considered- he’s asleep- no actual babysitting happening. But part of you can help but grumble about missing the action so you sit non too gently next to him and decidedly not pout.

Your stomach is full and the sun light begins to feel heavy and warm and nice.

Your eyes close before you can fight it.

Some time later, you’re shaken awake. Adrenaline fills your system instantly but upon seeing the laughing face of Sky himself, you remember yourself and only marginally resist the urge punch him.

“Feel better?” You ask instead.

“I could ask you the same thing.” He chuckles and points to his chin.

You wipe across the area and your hands comes back wet, cold and covered in drool. 

“You saw nothing.”

“Oh sure, but Wind did.”

Great.

Now it’s on his pictobox. That’s blackmail material in his favor, you suppose and refuse to acknowledge it further.

Wild

When you wake up, it’s still dark. Not even close to sunrise.

The fire burns bright and warm throughout the area but it’s not the fire that’s keeping you warm.

You also find out you can’t move.

You crane your head slightly to find long hair draped over your shoulder and a familiar scarred ear belonging to the resident champion.

He wrapped around you completely, hugging you tightly and pining you down with a leg to boot. 

You attempt to shimmy out but his grip tightens instead.

You sighed and watch as Twilight comes into view. He crouches closer and squats on Wild’s side, whispering to you. “Do you need help getting out? I can wake him to take over Hyrule’s shift for the night.”

You take a minute to rethink about your position. It’s not painful. The opposite actually. It feel nice. You’ve seen Wild cling to who ever he can get his hands on when he sleeps so you’re not surprise. 

You don’t need to pee or leave anytime soon anyway.

“No, I think I’m good actually.” You reply, whispering as well. “Let him sleep, it’s been a day for everyone.”

Twilight nods and leaves, but not without looking back once or twice in case you changed your mind.

You shimmy back in place and allow yourself to be held by your friend. 

Sleep comes easier this time.

Hyrule

Gentle fingers card through your hair. Warmth, magic and the unusual feeling of safety plague your mind. Confusion hits you but the alarm that typically follows never comes.

“Oh thank goodness, you’re awake.” A voice fills your ears. It’s muffled and must have been quiet to begin with because you can’t make out who said it yet. 

Organizing your thoughts feels like traveling through knee high mud.

Your eyes blink open and the light comes through.

The Traveler is leaning over you, thankfully blocking out most of the sun from immediately assaulting you. 

“Hyrule?”

“You had us worried for a minute.” He visually sags with relief, a tired smile on his face and leans back. “You took quite a hit.”

Your head feels swollen but as Hyrule continues to push your hair back it dissipates as time passes. Your thoughts clear and with his help, you sit up.

A hand places itself by your temple. It takes a half second before you realize it’s yours.

It comes back covered in dried blood.

Sky runs over after tending to Four with what looks like a bloodied wet cloth. He sits down slowly and begins to clean your head in a familiar fashion.

“Thank you. Both of you.” You tired voice comes through and a worn out smile follows soon after.

“Anytime.”

Wind

It’s nice day. 

According to some people.

Dark clouds cover the sky, the sun nowhere to be seen. It pours cats and dogs and the only cover for miles is a lone cave where your group currently takes up residence. Everyone’s wet and your clothes feel heavy and cold. No one is happy. 

Wild, Twilight and Legend dive deeper, intending to check out if any monsters reside in the cave.

Hyrule insisted on traveling with them but Warrior’s concussion and Time’s bleeding leg call for further attention and Legend claims to have more magic restorative potions than healing potions.

He stays behind.

Four and Sky take over the food while he’s distracted, trying to make a half decent meal before he intervenes.

Wind is groaning, sore and bored but otherwise unharmed.

You don’t make any comments at your own pain, biting your tongue and taking a deep breath. As you lean against the stone wall, Wind stomps up next to you and sits down with purpose.

“I could’ve gone with them.” He slams his fist into his cheek with his elbow on his knee.

“But you didn’t. It’s not so bad.” You said.

“They didn’t want me to go.”

“You’ll live.”

“I’m just as good as them you know.”

“I know and you make a better pillow.” You says, throwing yourself sideways with your head landing on his lap. He squawks indignantly and attempts to push you off but you hold on. “Sorry, you make the best pillow.”

“NOOOO!”

“YEEEESSS!”

“Nooooo.” Wind keeps his hands on your back but you’ve misjudged your exhaustion. You’re out in seconds.

A moment passes.

“Hey, hey, hey.... wake up. You have to eat.” A small hand shakes your shoulder.

“Hm?” You blinked tiredly. There’s a bowl if front of your face and you don’t hesitate to grab it. “Thanks.”

“You’re heavy.” A voice calls from behind. The owner lets you take the bowl and begins to gently push you off into a sitting position. “I can’t believe you did that.”

“It was supposed to be a joke but thanks for letting me sleep.” You admit and smile at the pirate. 

“You trapped me.” He pokes your side, trying to look annoyed but falling flat. There’s a joke in there somewhere. You’re missing something.

The others have come back while you were out of it, all either have hidden smiles or failing to hide their shaking shoulders and snickers.

Curious and a little self conscious you looks into the provided meal, your reflection greeting you as always.

A lightbulb goes off over your head.

“DID YOU DRAW ON MY FACE?!”

Four

There’s a force dragging you down but there’s two arms under you.

It’s very concerning for a moment but then....the size of them catches up to you.

Your head snaps up and comes face to face with a very surprised Four.

“Hello.”

“...Hi.”

“Lovely weather we’re having, don’t you think?””

“You’re leading with that?” Four snorts and continues walking, unbothered by your weight in his arms.

“How...?” You trail off trying to find the right words to explain what happening to you. You don’t feel any pain and nothing feels injured....but the lack of memories is a little concerning.

“How am I holding you?” Four smirks as he guesses incorrectly. “I’m stronger than I look.”

“I was going to ask how did I fall unconscious. I don’t remember anything. I’m more surprised by that than the fact that you’re holding me despite being half my size.” You blinked and try to keeping searching through your memory.

Nothing comes up.

“Wizrobe.” Four answers causally with a shrug. “It caused some chaos, fought another wizrobe and you got caught in the cross fire between the two of them before we could intervene. Their attacks canceled each other out well enough that you weren’t actually injured but uhh..... Well I suppose you’ll figure it out sooner or later.”

“Four.” You glare in warning.

“Maybe don’t look at your reflection for a while. Legend, Twilight and Hyrule all agree that it’ll fade with time but...”

“What are you talking about? What happened to me?” You sit up a little in his grip, Your arm reach over his shoulders and something wrong catches your eyes.

Your skin is green.

Your shocked silence stills your entire body. Four winces once he follows your eye line and stops to place you on your own feet.

“It could be worse?”

You stare a little while longer and look back to Four with hopeful eyes. “Think you can knock me out again?

He’s not amused.

Legend

You blissfully wake up for the first time in a week. 

It’s been an easy week in terms of travel and attacks so the boys take it upon themselves to cause trouble and it hasn’t been merciful to your sleep schedule.

They are the very incarnation of that thing your hometown friend used to say. How did it go again? If there’s no trouble then I’ll create it? Something along those lines.

But this is different and you don’t plan on wasting it.

You close your eyes and attempt to go back to sleep while you can but hushed voices reached your ears, keeping you awake before you can tune them out.

“Should we wake them?”

“You know how Legend is. He can be as bad as Sky and he had a rough night to boot.”

“But he’s right on top of them and they promised to show me how to fight in hand to hand combat.”

“You have all day for that and they didn’t say it was going to be today.”

“But I‘m excited! I want to start as soon as possible.”

“Will you idiots keep it down?” A voice by your shoulder speaks up. It lacks the usual snark it posses but the intention for venom is there. “Some people took double shifts last night. Shut up.”

You breath a small sigh of relief as the voices abruptly cut off and don’t return for a long minute.

The body next to you stills.

Three heartbeats pass and the unnoticed weight gets off of you.

You pretend to be asleep still, not wanting him to push you away so early in your relationship. He’s just started to get used to you.

You’re determined to be his friend before everything ends.

He’s determined to avoid that.

It’s been a battle of wills.

An unstoppable force meets an unmovable object.

But this could tip the scales in his favor if you fail to play it off correctly.

“No one say anything.” Legend hisses. “Not. One. Word.”

You make the mistake of stretching. 

“You’re up! You’re up! You’re up!” Wind practically pounces on you, knocking his name sake out of your lungs and demolishing any chances for a peaceful morning. “We can start now!”

“Can I eat first at least?” You groan out, not bothering to fight him off.

“Wind. Off.” Time calls out and the boy follows the command without question. He quickly kneels by your side though, practically vibrating on the spot.

You sit up and look around.

Looks like you were the last one up.

“Morning everybody.” You smile. You glance at Legend who unluckily has the tips of his ears tinted red. His arms are crossed and he’s avoiding looking at you, even greeting you as the rest of the group return your call.

You smirk. “Good morning Legend. Did you sleep well?”

He huffs and turns away completely, taking a few steps to leave.

You get to your feet, shadowed by Wind and head to take your share of the food from Wild.

A beat passes without any words exchanged and you tilted your head innocently at the Veteran. You refuse to let it be awkward between you so you pretend you know nothing.

The blush travels down his ears to his face and neck. “I did. Thanks for asking.”

[mackeydoodledoo]

Demon or Human?

Pairing: Bela Dimitrescu x Demon (Fem!)Reader

Summary: A foreign invader comes into Castle Dimitrescu just as you were settling in with your new family. However, how far would you be willing to go to protect your newfound home and your newfound love?

Warning: Game spoilers (I’ll try to keep those at a minimum), Blood, Slight G0R3, uncontrollable demon rage, fluff at the end

A/N: In light of some Resident Evil Village spoilers... Let’s just say I WILL NOT HAVE IT! So, I guess this is another entry to my The Demon Amongst Vampires series! R is My Character: Hydrangea Dragonfold

--------------------------------------------------------------

1 Year..

You’ve been inhabiting Castle Dimitrescu for one year. Alcina had been able to persuade Mother Miranda to keep you in her care instead of letting you be hunted for sport. You’d probably survive it anyway, with your demon abilities. 

“I have to go to a meeting,” Alcina announces to you and her daughters, “Apparently Mother Miranda has found a foreigner man-thing in our village grounds.”

“A man?!” Daniela squeals of excitement

"A new plaything?!” Cassandra asks

“You must bring him here at once mother,” Bela says

She looks at her three children, almost looking like she is tired of their pleas. However, she recomposes herself

“I will have to persuade Mother Miranda as best as I can,” Alcina says, “I appoint Hydrangea on watch. Bela is in charge.”

You leave your mouth agape, hearing your name after while of Bela calling you “micul meu demon” or everyone else calling you demon.

“But mother-” Cassandra interrupts

“Why can’t it be either one of us?” Daniela motions to her and Cassandra

“Because I’m the oldest,” Bela flaunts her ‘eldest sibling title’

“There will be no complaints my daughters,” Alcina says, “Guard the castle well Hydrangea.”

“Of course My lady,” you say out of respect

“You have permission to call me Alcina Hydrangea,” She smiles

Alcina makes her exit. 

“I get the first bite on the man thing,” Daniela blurts out

“Not if I catch him first,” Cassandra interrupts

“Enough!” Both you and Bela scream

Your blue flames ignite slightly, almost setting the table on fire. However, you compose yourself. Thus, your flames ‘dieing’.

“We will wait for your mother to return,” You sigh, “Gosh you two are rowdy. No wonder why Bela is in charge.”

You ignite your flames once you stand, heading off towards the staircase. However, Bela follows you. You didn’t notice her presence until she grabs your wrist and pulls you into a room.

“Bela love what are you doing?” You ask

You try to get her to let go of you however, you stop fighting her as she doesn’t reply to you but only snakes her arms around your midsection, taking in your warmth that you were producing. Not only from your natural body heat, but your demon form as well. You were also sure that she was also listening to your racing heartbeat. The one thing you feared was giving too much heat, too much to the point where Bela and possibly everyone else you’ve come to love and care about they turn to ash because of your carelessness of your flames. 

“I... Love, I have to leave,” You sigh, placing your hand on her head and the other on her waist 

“No you don’t,” She counter argues

“I do my love,” You say, looking down at her, “I have to keep you three safe.”

“And you think we can’t protect ourselves?!” Bela asks

“That is not what I meant love,” You say, “It’s just... It’s just I’m not over what happened last time... If I hadn’t come when I did, you would have died... I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself for that. I’d die if anything happened to you.”

Bela’s grip on you only tightens when you finish your sad ramble. This gets you in tears. You really couldn’t imagine the rest of your life without her.

“You’d die... For me?” She asks

“Of course I would love,” You smile, swooping her into your arms

Fortunately, your blue flames weren’t ignited enough to accidentally burn her. Your foreheads touch as you give her a kiss

“This is so much better,” Bela sighs in relief

“It really is,” You smile, “Thank you Bela.”

She kisses your forehead. You lay your head against her shoulder, hoping you could just stay like that for a little bit longer.

“Bela?” You ask, breaking the silence

“What is it my love?” She asks

“If this man... If this man scurries around the castle and hurts any of you,” You start, “What if I lose control of my demon form and I no longer see the human in me?”

“Simple, I‘ll get you out,” She answers

“What if you can’t?” You ask, worried now, “What if I’m the one who ends up hurting you?”

“Can you promise me one thing then?” She asks

You nod.

“The don’t use your full demon form,” She requests, “If you’re worried about hurting us, don’t use it. Should you though, I will pull you out.”

You had wished you were able to stay like that forever. However, you knew you had to begin your task. You and Bela give each other one last kiss before departing each others’ presence and embrace. Bela goes back down to the foyer to meet her sisters once more.

“You two okay?” Daniela asks, breaking the silence

“We are fine Daniela,” Bela answers

“Then when will the both of you just shut up and get married?!” Cassandra asks, clearly teasing Bela now

 “We are not-we don’t plan on that yet,” Bela says, “It’s never come up when we talk and we don’t need to yet.”

“Sure,” Daniela teases

As you were scouting the grounds of the castle, you already see Alcina returning to the castle.

“My lady!” You call out, “I’m assuming it didn’t go well?”

“Mother Miranda gave that man-thing to Heisenberg, of course I’m upset!” She groans in frustration, “I need a drink.”

You follow her back into the castle where her daughters immediately stand to greet her.

“Where’s the male foreigner?” Bela asks

“Mother Miranda gave him to Heisenberg that fool,” She groans

You all watch her walk up the stairs and disappear into the castle. You four seat back down into the couch, Bela leaning into your embrace. 

“How was scouting O-great demon king?” Daniela teases

“It was fine Dani,” you chuckle, “Are you just going to continuously make nicknames for me Dani?”

She nods as she leans back into the chair. However, before any of you could converse on, you could hear footsteps. You motion for the girls to stop talking.

“You guys hear that too?” You whisper

You motion for the three of them to follow you and once you get to the grand entrance of the castle, you see a man. 

“Looking for Rose?” Daniela calls out to him, taunting him

The three of them begin forming into their fly swarm and move toward him. You make the decision to tell Alcina herself that a man has entered the castle. 

“My lady, there is a man in the castle,” You sigh, “Your daughters are on the case. I’m not sure who he is- oh, speak of the devil, here they are.”

You hear the doors burst open along with struggled grunts. You look over and notice Cassandra and Bela dragging him in.

“Mother, I bring you fresh prey,” She says, trying to take the credit

“Oh, you are so kind to me daughters,” Alcina smiles, her daughters letting a slight giggle out of their mouths, “Now, let’s take a look at him.”

She stands up and faces him, “Well, well, Ethan Winters. You’ve escaped my little brothers’ idiot games did you? Let’s see how special you are.”

You watch Bela, Daniela and Alcina taste his blood. You stand next to Cassandra as you watch.

“Hey-Hey you, help me out!” Ethan pleas at you

You turn to look at him for a second. You feel your human willing to help him however, you end up turning your back to him, not willing to help him. If anything, you also hated men. 

“Starting to go a little stale,” Alcina says, “But, I must inform Mother Miranda. Later, there will be enough for everyone. Put him up.”

You watch again as Bela and Daniela hook his hands and Cassandra hoists him up. You hear him groan in pain as you all begin making your exit.

“Hey... Hey you!” He again calls for you, “Help me... Please...”

You stop in your tracks and look up at him. You only let out a low chuckle as Bela gently grabs your wrist and pulls you out from the room.

As you were finishing something with Cassandra you suddenly hear Bela’s grunts.

“Hey, I gotta go,” You say out of the blue

You follow Bela’s voice, rushing even further when you could hear her voice getting louder and louder.

“Bela! Bela!” You call out for her

You pass through the kitchen and notice Bela on top of Ethan. However, she doesn’t notice how he’s aiming his gun. Only you had noticed.

“Bela! The windows!” You scream, “He’s gonna shoot the windows!”

Believing that she didn’t hear you, you ignite your flames even more so than earlier. But, it’s concentrated to your palms. You begin melting the bars that had separated from you reaching Bela. However, just before the glass had gave way to the heavy damage, the bars melted enough for you to burst through. You hear Bela’s pained scream as the glass gave way to the heavy damage. 

“You- stupid man-thing!” Bela screams

You only pictured how she was the last time she was out in the cold. You let out an ear-piercing roar as you forcefully push Ethan out of the way to get to Bela. Igniting your flames ever so slightly, you pick Bela up and begin warming her up with your flames and your natural body heat. You go back into the dungeons and place her down gently, hoping you had warmed her enough.

“Are you okay?!” You ask, tears welling into your eyes

“I am now love,” She smiles, caressing your cheek

“Go!” You say, “Get your sisters an get somewhere safe! He knows! I’ll come find you.”

You watch Bela disappear into the dungeons, hopefully back into the castle to warn her sisters. You go back to where Ethan had shot the window. He was hoping you’d feel pain with the cold however, when you emerged from the cold wind, you came out, unphased.

“What the HELL ARE YOU?!” Ethan asks

“The one who will kill you,” You growl, taking in the cold, “My blood’s boiling...”

Your blue flame continue to ignite more than usual and you pounce onto him, snarling in his face. He tries to use his shotgun on you and he manages to graze the side of your head. He manages to wriggle himself out of your grip and shoots at you again, this time, in the shoulder. 

“Stay down kid,” He says mercilessly and runs into the direction you came

“Get back here you coward!” You scream, trying to stand

As your body began regenerating, you continuously crawled in the direction he was going in, beginning to track his scent. It was difficult as you were in the room where the wines are created. However, it didn’t stop you from continuing on the path. When you fully regenerated your shoulder, you get up nd try to track his scent as best as you could. However, when you only got back into the castle.

“Bela!” you call

You felt a hand on your wrist as you begin getting pulled into a room. A feeling of relief washes over you as you hug Bela tightly. You look over her shoulder and only see Cassandra with her.

“Where’s Daniela?” You ask, in a panicked state

“She ran off, hoping to take down the man herself,” Cassandra sighs

You hear the door burst open and it’s Alcina.

“That man will pay for what he’s done,” She growls, “My daughter are you hurt?”

“I was but- thanks to Hydrangea,” Bela sighs in relief, leaning into your shoulder to warm up some more

“Where’s Daniela?” Alcina asks

“She went to the library to take down the man mother, we tried to stop her,” Cassandra sighs

“You two stay with Hydrangea until I return with his head and Daniela,” Alcina orders before leaving again

She makes her leave. The three of you sit on the couch, Cassandra and Bela huddling against you for warmth. However, Bela practically seating herself into your lap.

“Do you have to be such a hog of the human furnace?” Cassandra looks at her older sister in annoyance

“I’m her girlfriend so buzz off,” Bela says

“She may be your girlfriend but I need some warmth too,” Cassandra growls

You could hear Daniela’s pained grunts and screaming. You stand up and place Bela down onto the couch next to her sister. You flick your finger and a small flame goes into the fire place, igniting the firewood.

“Alcina hasn’t found her yet,” You say, “I’ll go get Daniela the both of you stay here okay?”

Once you left the room you break into a run towards the library. You break through the door just as Ethan begins opening the roof to let in the cold air again.

“STOP!” You scream, grabbing onto Daniela

Sorry Bela... I have to do this... To protect all of you. You four accepted me almost instantly... I have to protect my home. I’m not letting anyone die here! The only one dying is him....

The ground around you became engulfed in blue flames, surrounding both you and Daniela

[A/n: not my gif]

“I got you Dani,” You say, the last time you heard your own voice

You look at Ethan completely deranged, more than Cassandra could ever look deranged at one of her “pets”. Ethan begins to walk backward however, tripping over an object.

“Let’s talk about this kid!” Ethan pleas, “From one human to another-”

“I’m not a human!” You spat, your demon voice overtaking your real voice, “I’m a demon! I protect my home and everyone in it!”

You let go of Daniela and leave her on the floor for Alcina to check on her. You throw Ethan out of the library. Alcina takes Daniela to where her other two daughters were. You throw him down a set of stairs. Coincidentally where Bela had opened the door.

You stand at the top of the stairs, looking down at Ethan, “You’ve overstayed your welcome... Time to say goodnight.”

“No-No please I beg you please I just wanted to find my daughter!” He screams

“All of this? For a child who isn’t even here?!” You mock him, “Your little baby could even be dead for all I care!”

Ethan draws his gun and pulls the trigger as a last resort to get you to stand down. However, you slice his arm off. You could hear his screams of pain as you now stand over him.

From the other room, Bela, Daniela, Alcina and Cassandra watch as you begin devouring his flesh. You stop after two bites out of his flesh you turn to the four women. Unable to feel your human, instead feeling your demon take full control over your body, you charge at Cassandra, Daniela, Alcina, even Bela. Alcina, being the protective mother she is, stands in front of her daughters, ready to slaughter you so if you lay a finger on her daughters like this. However, Bela runs past the three.

“Bela, get back here!” Alcina yells

Before you could lay a finger on them, Bela throws her arms around you, holding onto you tightly. As you flail your arms about, Bela still held onto you

“It’s me,” Bela says, calmly, “It’s okay now... I’m right here. Come back to me...”

You finally stopped flailing, your blue flames dissipating and your demon eye slits turning back into their round pupils.

“Be..la?” You call 

You gently place your hand on her head and the other around her. You sink into her touch and fall to your knees, Bela following your movements.

“It’s okay now,” She coos, “I’ve got you love. I’ve got you.”

You choke on your sobs as you hold onto Bela for dear life, sobbing into her shoulder.

“Bela did manage to get you out after all?” Alcina admires her oldest daughter, “And I thought I was going to have to kill her.”

Alcina sips her wine.

“Mother!” Bela growls

“I need to protect my prides and joys,” Alcina states

Bela was sitting in your lap as Daniela is huddled against your side and Cassandra on the floor facing you, Bela and Daniela.

“Do you really have to hog to the human furnace Bela? I’m the one who almost died,” Daniela growls

“She’s my girlfriend,” Bela draws the ‘girlfriend’ card for the millionth time

“How long do you intend on pulling that card against us Bela?” Cassandra asks

“As long as I want,” She smiles down at you

You smile back up at her, “Daniela, I also warmed you up in almost an instant with that amount of flames I emitted earlier. Did that not help?”

“Oh it did,” She smiles

“Then you don’t need to be complaining,” Bela scoffs

“By the way, I am digging the new look on you Hydrangea,” Cassandra says, smiling at you

Black horns with bright blue accents had remained from your blue flame horns or at least under them and a tail remained.

“Do you now Cass?” You smile, “I do too.”

Your tail unconsciously wraps itself around Bela’s waist. You could feel Bela’s fingertips playing with the fluff end of your tail, making your cheeks flush a faint pink.

“Awwww micul meu demon is blushing,” Bela teases

“Ssshut it,” You hiss

You weren’t sure how well you were going to do with that man-thing called Ethan Winters roaming around the castle. However, this was your home. You went to great lengths to protect it. Especially your new family and your girlfriend. Even if you would lose your human, you had Bela. You trust her enough to bring you back, should you lose sight of that human in you.

[samstree]

For the reverse trope ask: the soft character comforting the tough character after a trauma

Piece Him Back Together

Part of the reverse trope series.

When Geralt gets kidnapped, it's up to Jaskier to rescue him. Some truths about a witcher's worst weakness come to light.

(geraskier, 2.1k, hurt/comfort, geralt whump, mutual pining, competent jaskier, love confession, mild blood)

read on AO3

"Shit, shit, shit..."

Jaskier lets out a string of curses all the while balancing the weight of two fully grown men with stumbling footwork. He desperately tries to keep Geralt up with a hand on the small of his back but fails to stop the injured witcher from drooping with each step, until, at last, both of them wind up in a heap of limbs by the road.

Geralt lets out a pained grunt and Jaskier scrambles with apologies.

“Fuck, sorry.” The bard shifts Geralt’s bulk with all he can muster and finally settles him on a patch of soft moss under the tree. The witcher hisses as his back hits the bark rather heavily. “Shit, I’m so sorr—”

“You already said,” Geralt interrupts him but there’s no anger in his tone.

“Still. I am.”

Jaskier retrieves a handkerchief from his pocket and begins to dab at the mess of blood at Geralt’s temple, wincing when he finally sees how bad the blow is. Blood oozes from the gash, slower than a moment before. The fabric is soaked through and the skin there is still tender.

It’s all witchers’ weakness.

The temple. A blow to the head.

It messes up all their senses and coordination, leaving them in the most vulnerable state. If Jaskier had reached him any later, this might have done Geralt in.

Jaskier lets out a distressed sound at the thought.

“Stop fussing. We need to go.” The witcher, against all odds, remains level-headed.

“No, it’s all right. I knocked out all the guards and servants, along with the duke and his mage.” Jaskier tilts Geralt’s head for a better angle to press the handkerchief down on the wound. “I may have given the two of them a little more than the recommended dose. The lady at the apothecary warned me about the risk of choking with much sleeping potion, urgh, like I give an ounce of fuck if they die a gruesome death or not. It’d be a favor to the town.”

The venom surprises even Jaskier himself, and Geralt lets out a meaningful hum.

“Rest assured, my dear. No one will be looking for us today.”

Up close, Jaskier can feel Geralt scrutinize him intently as if to burn a hole into his face. He meets the amber gaze, the dark pupils still a little blown wide from the shock, but there’s also something akin to relief flowing in those beautiful eyes.

He revels in the silence, observing Geralt in return for further signs of hurt, but finds none.

The witcher relents first, the tiniest smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “So you drugged an entire castle?”

“Didn’t think I had it in me, huh?” Jaskier teases. “The White Wolf, saved by a humble bard and forever impressed by his wit.”

“Hmm.”

“Well, don’t beat yourself up, oh mighty witcher. I’m sure you only needed the rescue because those villains took advantage of your only weakness.” The bard adds his usual dramatic flair into the last two words.

Geralt blinks. Something shifts in his expression, his breathing picking up and his eyes darting everywhere. If the bard didn’t know better, he’d say the witcher is flustered, which makes it all the more confusing.

“Mocking me, are you?” Geralt drops his gaze and tries to shy away, but the bard holds him in place with the other hand. Under Jaskier’s palm, the frame of the witcher’s ear is heating up.

“How am I mocking you? Geralt, even you must admit witchers aren’t all-powerful beings.” Jaskier frowns. “They messed up your head. I know all your senses get muddled when you’re like this. Seriously, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“What are you talking about?” the witcher snaps his gaze back to Jaskier, a puzzled crease deep between his brows, which only makes the bard scoff with amusement.

“The head wound, of course. How did they get you? An ambush and a blow to the head, I’m assuming.” Jaskier explains. “How else did you get yourself into a dungeon and dimeritium cuffs? What, are you telling me you walk into their trap voluntarily?”

He rolls his eyes at the offhanded joke but the silence from the witcher leaves the mood heavier. Somehow, it doesn’t feel like a denial of what he just said. Geralt is staring at him with an inexplicable look on his face, and these looks are hard to come by these days. Jaskier prides himself in being the best on the continent at reading his witcher, and he has no inclination to break the streak.

“What happened then? Talk to me, Geralt.”

Jaskier removes the handkerchief a little. The gash has stopped bleeding, so he ties it around Geralt’s head carefully to keep the wound shielded, at least until they can wash it properly. His hands stay with Geralt afterwards, waiting for him to open up.

“I—” Geralt purses his lips before continuing, golden eyes meeting the bard in earnest. “They didn’t ambush me, Jask. I walked into that castle unarmed by choice.”

“What?” Jaskier’s jaw drops.

“It’s because—” the witcher scowls. “Because I thought…that they had you.”

It’s like a lightning strike, where their skin connects tingling all the way from the tips of Jaskier’s fingers to a warm pool of fuzziness in his stomach. The air is suddenly too hot so Jaskier decides to put more space between them.

“Oh.”

Geralt chases him ever so slightly before settling back with resignation, his eyes still bare and vulnerable, as if he just revealed the darkest secret when it is only the sweetest thing in a horrible, horrible way.

“A whisper of you being held hostage and suddenly I couldn’t think. Couldn’t remember to check the truth. Couldn’t waste another second.” Geralt hovers a hand near the bard’s face before retreating to his side. “You were right that they got me because of my one weakness, Jaskier. Just not the one you assumed.”

The pounding in Jaskier’s chest is jumping out of his throat. He’s sure he will die within the next minute if he doesn’t speak to ease this ache in his heart.

“Oh.”

He ends up saying dumbly.

“It was too late when I noticed the absence of you. Your voice, your heartbeat, your scent. Nothing. You weren’t in that castle or the cells. All I could hear was silence and all I could smell was blood.” Geralt draws a shuddering breath. “I hoped, when they kept me in the dark, that they were lying about ever having you. That you were nowhere near that damn place instead of—”

The witcher swallows, unable to finish the sentence.

“Instead of,” Jaskier adds for him, “they’d already killed me.”

The tension hangs between them. The bard sits back on the heels of his feet and finds himself at a loss for words for the very first time in his life.

Geralt might be the only person who can force Jaskier through so many firsts in his life. His first time writing a hit song, first time smashing into someone’s face with a lute, first time saving a witcher’s life, and perhaps, first time murdering two evil overlords obsessed with collecting witchers for experiments.

Hmm, it’s not like Jaskier regrets any of these.

Geralt reaches out again, tentative and patient like he’s approaching a spooked horse. This time, Jaskier takes pity and meets him halfway, his thumb rubbing small circles at the sword callouses that he adores so much.

“Say something,” Geralt pleads.

Jaskier swallows a lump in his throat and sniffles to ease the congestion in his nose, his vision blurring in desperation.

“It’s the most words you’ve said in one sitting, Geralt. You’ll have to allow me a moment to figure out what you are saying and, most importantly, not saying.” He lets out a humorless laugh. “It’s you, you know? There’s always something you are holding back and that is often the crux of it. I thought I got good at reading between the lines, but this is…overwhelming.”

With the enhanced healing kicking in, Geralt is looking much better by the minute. The blood dries and crusts over and his eyes almost shining in the daylight, or is it just the emotions within them? Jaskier can’t tell.

“Maybe I can help you. With the hidden words.” Geralt squeezes Jaskier’s fingers reassuringly. He tilts his head in the most endearing way. It happens to be that particular head tilt that Jaskier treasures with his life, the one that manages to always take his breath away.

“I love you, Jask.”

The warm pool of fuzziness in Jaskier’s stomach turns into a bottomless pit, and he’s falling.

And soaring.

“I love you.” Geralt smiles sadly. “In the dark of that cell, it became…ever so clear and so loud that I couldn’t deny it anymore. I love you, in spite of myself. Gods, I’ve loved you for so long.”

Geralt picks up Jaskier’s hand and places the barest touch of a kiss there, his lips chapped but oh so gentle. Jaskier lets out a soft gasp and the tears roll down uncontrollably. The next thing he knows, he’s buried deep in Geralt’s embrace. The sobs choke in his lungs like a dam has been broken.

“I—” Jaskier is amazed to find that their roles have reversed. The witcher has expressed everything but the bard becomes mute. So he takes up Geralt’s role gladly and replies with actions.

Jaskier’s lips are pressed everywhere he can reach: the soft, warm skin of Geralt’s neck, the sharp of his jaw, his cheek, the tip of his nose. He disregards the grime and dirt and kisses Geralt’s uninjured temple, the single most fragile part of a witcher’s body—barring their heart, so it seems. He tucks away a strand of white hair and kisses Geralt’s temple one more time, tasting the salty tang of tears.

When he pulls back, Geralt’s smile is blinding.

He hears Jaskier, even though—

“I still don’t know what to say,” Jaskier croaks, sniffling hard.

The bard rests his hands at the nape of Geralt’s neck and loses himself in the sunlit golden honey, his favorite color in the world and the most beautiful dream that’s ever come true.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Geralt wipes away the wetness on Jaskier’s face with the pad of his thumb. “Master Jaskier, poet, minstrel, professor… Stumped for words and forever impressed by a witcher’s love confession.”

He mimics Jaskier’s phrasing and the bard can’t help but chuckle despite the tears and snout, his hand swatting at Geralt’s shoulder. Jaskier knows he must look so absurd, laughing and crying all at once, but it’s the last thing in the world that matters.

Geralt loves him, and—

“You got hurt because of me.”

The remorse licks up, along with the urge to protect and to care. The sight of Geralt limp and bloody, bound by the wrists in a dark cell is something Jaskier never wants to relive again.

“I don’t care, Jask.”

“I care.”

“Then make it better.”

So he does. Geralt never wavers as Jaskier captures his lips and pours everything he cannot voice into the kiss, drawing a contented moan out of the witcher.

“Does it still hurt?” the bard whispers between one breath and the next.

“A little.”

Jaskier resumes his work and cards deft fingers through silver hair, careful not to nudge the handkerchief. His nails ghost over Geralt’s scalp and scratches gently until a purring sound rumbles deep in the witcher’s chest. The bard giggles proudly.

“Now?”

“Keep going.”

Geralt traps Jaskier between his strong arms devours him with passion, the heat of his body solid and calming.

Jaskier has never thought of himself as a protector, except at this moment with his witcher arching into his every touch and producing those heavenly sounds. The world is too bent on hurting Geralt, too eager to take and take and take from him.

A bard is not a fighter. Jaskier cannot stop monsters from tearing through armors or crossbows fired with ill intent.

But a bard is a lover. What Jaskier can do is heal, is piece Geralt back together with gentle words in the dark and soft lips on the thin skin at his temple.

“How about now?”

They are panting in tandem, the gold of Geralt’s eyes dreamy and out of this world.

“Still dizzy.”

“That’s from all the kissing, you oaf.”

But Geralt begs wordlessly with those wide, puppy-like eyes so openly, and Jaskier’s already non-existent resolve breaks into a million pieces. He kisses Geralt until the witcher melts into a puddle of purring mess, sun-warmed and pliant.

And he kisses Geralt more.

Again and again.

---

Thanks for the prompt. I kind of just rolled with the concept. The twist looks a bit obvious from the beginning, but feel free to tell me what you think. <3

Tagging: @wanderlust-t @rockysstupidity @flowercrown-bard @alllthequeenshorses @mothmanismyuncle @percy-jackson-is-sexy- @constantlytiredpigeon @behonesthowsmysinging @dapandapod @artisanbaguette @birdsflyhome

Please tell me if you want to be removed or added to the list <3

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Tell Me A Story

Loki x f(magic reader)

Summary: Stuck in an Asgardian cell for your crimes, you meet an intriguing fellow prisoner who you can’t help but start to feel something for.

Warning: angst, fluff (you’re not leaving sad on my watch)

Masterlist

The ground feels hard. And your head feels incredibly fuzzy, like waking up from a deep slumber by some rude acquaintance who can’t mind their own damn business. Not to mention the throbbing sensation emitting from the left side of your cheek like two annoying disturbances. Were you smacked twice?

What in the bloody shitsticks?

The light in this place is so bright too, you have to squint when opening your irises for the first time to really get a good look at your surroundings. With the light in this awful place too much to bear, you cover your eyes with your fingers to lessen the harshness from above. Soon your gaze trails up witnessed a clean ceiling of pure marble white.

Wait. Are you dead?

Adjusting to the brightness, you slowly bring yourself into a seated position on the equally as shiny clean floor. To your left is a bed and a small nightstand while your right is a see through golden tinged barrier showing the other cells and a single guard walking down the hallway. Cells? Cells!

A prison? You’re in a fucking prison. Shit.

Letting out a dramatic sigh, head in your hands, you suddenly hear a knock on the white section of the confinement hold that turns into loud pounding. Thud! Thud! Thud! And a second later the white disappears, in place shows the same see through golden tinge. A guard on the other side.

“You’re awake.” He says, voice casual as an old friend.

You give him a puzzled look before feeling your face, “I think so.”

He takes a step into your prison where a sword is held in your face, maybe not so much an old friend after all, “As protocol, I must ask you three questions.” Delves the guard, stance never changing.

“Go for it tough guy.”

He remains unfazed, “Do you know your name?” Easy.

“Y/N.”

“Do you know why you’re here?” Uh.

“Well it wasn’t for stealing a child’s favorite toy.” You muse before quickly changing your façade, “But yes.”

He scoffs unamused, “Do you know where you are?”

Now this question you don’t have an answer for so instead do you give him your sweetest most innocent face possible, “uh, maybe you could enlighten me?”

The armored man rolls his dark eyes, “You’re in the royal dungeons of Asgard, placed here by King Odin for crimes against our realm. For that. You will remain until otherwise noted by the King.” Barks the guard, you stare up at him with wide eyes. Shocked and bewildered that you’re stuck in Asgard of all places.

“I didn’t even have a fare trial!” You protest.

“You didn’t deserve one, filth.” He counters before sheathing his sword back into its scabbard and off he goes into the golden tinged door. Out of sight in an instant. Rude.

Leaving yourself very puzzled and irritated at the whole ordeal, you never even got a trial to speak your side of the story. Nothing. Now you’re stuck in this dumb shit of a cell with literally nothing to do and no one around to bother, oh wait who’s that across the room?

Jumping to your feet, you swiftly walk over to the glass; there stands a man in green and black attire, leather bound book in hand as his slender face focuses onto the pages. He’s rather handsome in all honesty, with that dark shoulder length hair of his and the thoughtful expression across his face. You’re now fully intrigued.

Then your mind swirls with a thought, you’re in Asgard. So, this must be prince Loki, the one who failed to conquer Midgard. Soon a devilish smirk crosses your features, “What are you doing down here? I thought princes were the ones to put delinquents behind bars?”

Loki’s face shifts from surprise to amusement as he keeps his eyes onto the pages, “Kings.” Corrects the Asgardian prince.

You smile, “Well this king can eat shit!”

He lets out a breathy snort before finally drawing his gaze up to you, his expression quickly diminishes from amusement into star struck fascination when those beautiful blues land upon your beaming mischievous face. Loki has never seen someone so magnificently enticing in his whole entire life. But here you are, whoever you happen to be.

The raven haired man sets the book onto his nightstand before sauntering over to the glass wall, “And who do I presume you are? My new source of entertainment.”

Waving him off like a blushing maiden, you pretend to get all hot and bothered by his sly comment, “Oh wouldn’t you like to know.”

Loki smirks, “I would indeed.”

You curl a piece of hair around your finger, gifting him a shy smile as you avoid his steely gaze. “Sorry.” You mutter, “I only tell men who can take over whole planets in under three days.”

He immediately loses his humored aurora, replacing it with a slightly taken aback yet somewhat pissed off one. “Ouch. But I can’t image you’re any clever if you happen to be stuck down here with me.”

You point up a finger, “On the contraire, my faults are less hefty then your own. So who really lost here?”

“From the looks of it. Both of us.”

You nod, “That is a truthful observation, but what has gifted us a sentence in exile are two entirely different sides to the relatively same coin.”

“Mine being, failure to conquer and rule Midgard. And yours being?”

“Fine. I’ll satiate your appetite.” He raises a brow as you trail your hand down the buzzing glass, “I may have tried to steal some pretty gems downstairs. Blah blah and I got caught by some lady named Frigga who’s a lot more skilled with magic then I had first realized and now I’m here. Granted I don’t remember getting to said “here” but alas my body remains.”

Loki smirks, “My deer mother got the best of you. How is she up in the real world these days?”

“Oh you know, told me she loves reading, doing the usual witchy stuff, and she hates you so go burn in hell for eternity you shit head little boy.”

Loki could have choked on his own spit, “Pardon me?”

“You heard me, she said she loves you. Is that not what you heard? I really thought I was being pretty clear.”

The Asgardian prince shakes his head, “Forget I asked.” Turning around once again to find his way onto the comfortable looking mattress, new book in hand.

You pout at the lack of attention, what did you say to annoy him? Was it the little shit head boy? Maybe he’s just having a bad day.

——

There he is. That incredibly attractive Asgardian prince of Mischief, just standing there. Reading yet another book in his beautiful greens and blacks and golds as he chooses to ignore you. The insanely gorgeous but deeply irritating woman across the cell from him.

You’ve been in here for about four weeks now and Loki has not cracked once. You’re really trying too! All he’s done is gift you with some telling facial expressions or the wonderful side comment to address your theatrics or harmless shenanigans.

All you want to do is get to know him better. And maybe along the way get the fuck out of here with a little help, and then preferably take the prince along for the ride. If it was only that easy.

Levitating in your cell just because you’re tired of standing all the time, you keep your usual unabashed stare-down with the prince when a random guard marches by. He looks from right to left and forward again before doing a double take over to you.

“Hey! Stop that!” He shouts, lance raised at your smirking face while you continue to float, “You can’t do that here!”

You simply roll your eyes, “Who has made this new rule law?”

The guard pauses for a moment, clearly indicating that he just doesn’t want you floating because he’s a party pooper. He swallows, “By king Odin.”

“By king Odin? Doesn’t his son fly?”

“Huh?” He glances over to Loki who’s not paying attention to you two in the slightest.

“Not that one.”

The guard makes a frustrated grunt before removing his lance away from your face, no matter the safety of the glass, “You can remain afloat but only under my authority.” And with that does he stomp off down the corridor.

Idiot.

You beam a victorious grin as he leaves your sight when a sudden slow clapping can be heard from across the hallway. Immediately do you snap your attention up to the prince who’s already sharing one of his infamous smirks, “Congratulations. You’ll now have an enemy down here. And it only took you a few weeks.”

You scoff, moving yourself to float casually on your back, “It’s about time too. Things were starting to get unbearably dull around here.”

Loki hums, “Ever try reading?”

You snort, “No, no I haven’t. Hmm, but I’d love it if you could read to me, since I don’t happen to have any books within reach. It’s only fair.”

Loki raises a brow, “Only fair?”

“Yes. I have the guards annoyed with me, so, they won’t care much about you. And. You get to read, but also to me as well.”

“That’s a possibly compelling suggestion.” Says the prince, mulling over your words.

“I thought so.”

You close your eyes as a couple moments pass before he speaks again, “But I must decline.”

“What!” You shout in bewilderment as he lowly chuckles, “I might just about die of boredom, you want me on your conscience when I pass into oblivion from lack of entertainment!”

Loki smiles at your adorable face, “Make your own fun.” He teases, though you don’t realize this.

Moving yourself into a standing position, yet still without touching the ground, you press your hands against the golden tinged glass, “Loki! You are a beautifully great annoyance and if I wasn’t stuck in here I would throw all your books about! And then….then I’d knock down your nightstand!”

He smirks, “Charming.”

You pout while your fists clench in irritation, “Fine! I didn’t want to listen to your loathsome voice anyways!” He gifts you with a proud half grin as you turn from him to magically throw your wooden nightstand across the room.

You land, reaching a hand out to launch the nightstand back across the room once more before repeating this action again and again until the whole flimsy thing combusts when it crashes violently into the closest wall.

Breathing heavily, you slowly turn to face the irritation watching you do all of this, “Feel better Y/N.”

Pursing your lips together, you release your tight fists, “Yes.”

He nods, “What would you like me to read?”

“Something joyful…….please.”

Loki shares a handsome grin before giving you a respectfully small bow, “As the lady wishes.” Loki shares a small glance with your curious face before turning to search for a book. He kneels down and soon picks out a book colored in a deep blue, something foreign written in golden cursive on the front.

You slowly return to the ground, this time seated criss crossed as you lean half of yourself upon the glass as you try and get as close to Loki as physically possible. Which is difficult considering the hallway’s short distance keeping your cells apart, but you try anyways. He opens up the book and quickly looks up to catch your gaze before smiling and looking down at the first page.

Loki reveals the smallest blush before clearing his throat, “The Fox and the Raven.” You smirk at his adorable face, how focused and deep in thoughtful concentration he becomes as the words flow off of his sly tongue like molten gold. You could listen to him all day.

“Once there were two beings, equal in skill and game. Best friends since childhood even, but there was one thing that drove a wedge in their long relationship. Another. This beautiful being was beyond compare to that of any god or goddess alike. And the two friends where undoubtedly in love with them.

It began one windy day by the river, the beauty stood, washing their hair by the waters edge with not a mind to mess with anyone in their head. The two friends saw them and smiled. “I shall win their affections.” Claimed the dark haired admirer, Tala. “Not you silly fox, I shall be the one to draw their heart to mine.” Spoke Essek with great confidence, his bestfriend in the whole entire realm.

They looked to each other with clear frustration sculpted into their faces, so, the friends came to an agreement. Whoever failed to win over the water nymphs heart, that friend must stay in their animal form forever while the victorious one could live on as they always have. Maybe it was cruel. Maybe not at first.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months as the two friends would speak with the water nymph as often as they could. Tala in raven form and Essek as a dashing fox. All was going well as they played their little game of love until the water nymph began to grow quit fond of the raven for his talents in the sky and witty personality.

So much so that on the next full moon, the raven revealed himself to his true form before making love to the joyful water nymph on the rivers edge. And so the very next day when the fox arrived to speak with the nymph, he was surprised to find Tala laying underneath a weeping willow with the nymph in his strong arms.

The fox recoiled with jealousy before his heart shattered in two, Tala smiled a triumphant grin as the fox turned away in disappointment before rushing off into the woodland. Never to be seen again.

So that is why you can never trust anyone who is truly dear to you, for love is a fleeting thing and can turn friends into beasts for something as silly and pathetic as a beacon of affection.” Finishes Loki in an almost sour tone as you sit there on the cell floor, feeling a bit off and out of place from that abrupt turn of events.

You frown, “I thought you were going to read me a happy story?”

Loki closes the book, “I did.” Blue eyes on you in an instant.

“No. You really didn’t.”

Loki gives you an almost dumbfounded look, “The raven got to keep his original form and make love to the water nymph what else is there to want?” He questions like it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world. Not.

“The fox is depressed now. That’s not very happy.”

“It was happy for those two, was it not?”

You roll your eyes, “It was. But a happy story should have a happy ending for everyone involved. That’s the point of a happy tale being told.” You counter as he lets out a frustrated sigh.

“Not everyone gets what they want in the end, Y/N. That’s just life, some are fine and persist while others turn and run with nothing of any significance still clinging to them.”

You sit there a moment in bewilderment, soon rising to float threateningly by the glass, “That’s ridiculous! A happy story should be fucking happy! Love is supposed to be kind and beautiful, not this wedge that turns people against one another and supports a game that shifts into jealousy and disdain for one.”

Loki hums, “Well it is just a story after all. Love does that because it isn’t truthful ever, it’s a fleeting thing without any weight that only causes pain and disappointment.”

Your brows soon furrow at these dark words, “Oh and what do you understand about love?” You hotly challenge, voice accusatory and fierce.

“That it isn’t real.” Mutters the prince with a casual shrug, though his face flashes with uncertainty.

You scoff, “Is it now? You think love is a simple lie? A trick from the universe to keep races existing until their worlds collapse?”

“Yes.” Nods the Asgardian, “That’s what I believe.”

You take a breath, feet slowly touching the cool tiled floor as you speak, “You have no idea what it feels like then. So how can you claim it to be false?”

Loki crosses his arms, “True love isn’t real because that just cannot be realistic in any sense Y/N. Same thing as feeling happy or when you sneeze….the feeling is a feeling like butterflies in your stomach when you get excited. But like every emotion given, it leaves and the feelings are dulled or just dissipate altogether.”

“You’re wrong.” You bitterly mutter, voice low and filled with a somber hurt.

“And how would I be wrong then?” He wonders, truly curious to see how on earth you are able to counter this. He doesn’t wholeheartedly believe in love, though his growing affections for you seem to have him conflicted. He still wants to know.

“It is like magic, to be in love.” You reply, a faint smile ghosting your lips as you press your hands against the glass, “It is bright and brilliant and beautiful. It does not come and go like a fleeting spark from a dying flame. Love, like magic, forms from within when let into someone’s vessel. It is a power that always remains no matter where the person travels, or how old they become. Love, in the end and always through existence will remain. No matter what.”

Loki could have shed a tear at your beautiful explanation, yet his stubbornness persists, “A fairytale. Nothing more.”

“A fairytale? A fucking fairytale!?” You shout, voice rising in fury, “You don’t know anything but the lies you tell yourself you heartless bastard! All I wanted was a happy story that made me smile before I’m executed! And you couldn’t even give me that you selfish prick of a man!”

Loki’s heart grows cold as a winters morning, he blinks, forgetting how to properly breath at your heated declarations. He steps closer to the thin glass, brows furrowed in puzzled apprehension, “You’re being executed?” He asks, tone low and thoughtful.

Face falling into a deep frown, you lower your head in shame, “I have been condemned to die for my crimes above. Guess they’re not so simple as I had first claimed.”

“What do you mean?”

You let out a telling sigh, “I didn’t try and take the queens jewels, I tried to murder her..”

“You what?!” Whispers the Asgardian prince, eyes wide in shock, “What do you mean?”

Your gaze keeps trained onto the floor, “I am…well, I was….an assassin. Who, ultimately could not force myself to murder your mother Frigga, so I let myself be caught and taken. It’s the least I deserve for the life I’ve led. This is just how it goes, and I’m ready.”

Loki’s mind races, he never even suspected such a thing coming from you. Sure you’re indeed a beautiful mystery of a person who enjoys levitating in her cell for the hell of it. But your appearance and pose never revealed someone capable of homicide as their profession, least of all you.

And now, his father is condemning you to death rightly so, but Loki can’t help but think you don’t truly deserve this fate. Maybe, just possibly, he’d feel like he was losing a close friend. Someone who he never had any intentions of developing these strange new feelings for.

“I won’t let him end your life.” Suddenly speaks the prince, “You didn’t kill her, you actively chose not to, so I believe he could sway his final decision.”

You let out a breathy laugh, “Wishful thinking.” Just as three guards dressed in their true Asgardian golds walk to the front of your cell. Loki swallows, they dissipate the golden tinged force field, leaving you with nothing but air to keep you from their clutches.

“Y/N.” Softly calls the dark haired prince, voice small and desperate, he didn’t think they would take you so soon but what does he truly know anymore? Your sad eyes lock onto his as one guard snaps metal cuffs against your wrists, and another around your throat before he ushers you out.

Loki can’t tear his eyes from yours the whole time, and even after you’ve been dragged down the hallway and out of sight. He thinks, maybe you’ll return and it was all a big misunderstanding, a simple nightmare and he’ll wake any second now. But he knows this is foolish thinking, you’re never coming back. And he’s beside himself.

Loki bows his head in silent anguish, fists clenched tight as his heartbeat begins to race when suddenly he releases his grip and a small blast of green magic emits in the aftermath. Just enough power to knock some books onto the floor in protest. He doesn’t pick them up.

In the following days, Loki would pace around his cell like a nervous lion. Reading book after book to help pass the time though he couldn’t stop his racing mind from thinking about you. Where were you now? What had they done to you? Did it hurt?

He didn’t know and what’s worse is the guards only seemed to mock him about it, claiming your life was worth more dead then anything else. It stung like a heated iron spear left too long in the hot coals, he missed you beyond compare. How did you make him feel this way? When did that happen?

He missed your mischievous smile, your alluring eyes of curiosity and concealed chaos. The way you spoke to him like a person and not just a prisoner, or even a prince who’s disappointed his whole kingdom. You didn’t care, sure you lived to tease and pester him relentlessly, but you didn’t truly care about his current status.

You drew the attention out of him without even needing to try, brought a smile upon his face weather he was aware of it or not, and made him feel genuinely excited about waking up the next day. You became everything to him and more, and Loki hadn’t even realized this until it was too late.

But now you’re gone. And he will never see another Y/N for as long as he is to live.

Loki sits with his back against the wall, hair undoubtedly a wild mess closely matching that of the room about him. Books, clothing, furniture, and other personal belongings lay around his cell like the aftermath of a furious hurricane. He didn’t mean for this to happen, but when he got word that his mother was injured in the attack by the dark elves and freed prisoners. He new it was his fault, he led them to freedom after all.

With his mother healing from her non fatal wounds, and the loss of his dear Y/N to the axe. Loki has been doing less then tremendous these past few weeks, clearly. The prince now closes his weary eyes, breathing steadily as a new presence makes itself known across the golden tinged glass. He doesn’t care to look.

“Well don’t you look sad.” Teases a familiar voice, not condescending but just enough to make him laugh if he felt like it.

He opens his eyes to find your smirking face, body safe and sound wrapped in a cloak of white and intricately laced gold. How absolutely beautiful you are. His brows furrow as he mutters, “You’re just an illusion.” Voice horse and filled with doubt.

You raise a brow, “So is this?” You ask in reference to the clean cut illusion Loki is controlling, “I think not. I can see right through it.”

He forgot about the illusion he’s been creating since his breakdown, of course you’d see right through it, “You died. And my mother is hurt.”

“So you lost control within yourself and chose self deprecation? And apparently…chaos.” The trickster god rolls his tired eyes which causes you to chuckle, “I see my passing onto greater things has weakened your ego.”

He scoffs, “Your ghost form does not amuse me.”

Taking a glance down the vacant hallway, you step right through the golden tinged force field like it’s nothing more then air. “Loki Laufeyson, I am not a phantom or a dreary pigment of your imagination you foolish prick. I am Y/N, Goddess of Chaos and Magic. And someone who has missed you deeply.”

Loki frowns, blue eyes focused up at your truthful face as he sighs, “I….I don’t think I understand what is happening.”

You approach his side before kneeling down to reach his level, you two have never been this close before, “My tale was true as the forming of this realm itself. But your mother saw me for who I am, not what I have been enchanted to do with my life. So she gave me another chance to live, and so I did. To protect her and guard her until she deems otherwise, that’s why I’m still alive and that’s why your mother still has a beating heart.”

Loki reaches out for your hand that you gladly let him take, “Those prisoners..”

“I killed them. Every last one of those fuckers and the damn dark elves who attempted to crash their ship into the great hall. Let’s just say, it didn’t go according to their plans.” You explain, pausing for a moment to share a longing look with the Asgardian prince.

The corners of his lips rise into a soft smile, a deeply relieved one while you look down at your laced fingers, “Loki.” You whisper before drawing your head up to properly look at him.

“Yes.”

“I’m still counting on a better story.” You muse as he lets out a breathy laugh.

“Unfortunately none of these books happen to provide a decent tale, my dear.”

You gently squeeze his hand, “In that case I’ll bring you all the books stuffed in that giant library. There’s bound to be a good one, something happy.”

“I’d like that.” Nods the prince.

You smile, “But I have to ask you one thing.”

“Of course.”

“Did you miss me?”

Loki squeezes your hand right back, “More then I’d ever missed anyone.” Reveals the dark haired prince as he reaches up to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, though his fingers linger on your cheek a moment longer before he slowly pulls them away and into his lap.

You can’t help but snicker which causes his face to scrunch up in puzzled embarrassment. Immediately do you reach up to cup his cheek, “I felt the same way. And I think I might feel a bit more too, quit possibly a lot more. No. Yes definitely a lot more then I first led on from a few weeks ago in fact and all I must admit to you now Loki Laufeyson or Odinson..prince of Asgard I think I’d like to kiss you now if that’s okay with you.”

Loki blinks, did he hear you right? “oh.” He mumbles, clearly unsure of himself or whatever wonderful thing you just said.

You immediately remove your hand from his cheek, “Too soon. Sorry I just thought I read you right maybe I was wrong I can just leav….” You don’t even have a moment to finish your sentence when his lips press pleasantly against yours.

His hands hold your face while your own hands gently grip onto his forearms for support in your awkward positioning, with him sitting and you still crouched. But it matters not when his lips move in time with yours, he feels so lovely, like a hundred roses pressing against your skin.

Giving you that soft velvety feel, you could kiss him all day if he’d let you. Though soon enough the two of you must break for some air, and with that do you pull him to his feet while you float just inches off of the messy ground. Loki never once taking his hand away from yours.

“How can you….how can you do that?” Wonders the prince as he glances from the ground to your face.

You shrug, “How can you move things with your mind?”

He smiles, “I guess, I just can. A terribly lackluster explanation I know, but perhaps I’m not truly certain how either.”

“Well let’s not dwell on the unknown for too long, this moment right now is too sacred for anything else. And though I have to leave, I will return to you…..and next time with more books. Then you will have no choice then to read them all to me.”

Loki hums, “I don’t see a problem there.” Before whispering in your ear, “Maybe bring some wine, I couldn’t think of a better way to spend an evening.”

You share a bright grin, “As the spoiled prince asks, but it will cost you.”

Loki raises an intrigued brow, “Cost what?”

“A kiss. Before and after I do your bidding. Can you settle for those terms?”

Loki’s lips pull into an adorable smile, cheeks almost dusting pink at your new flash of boldness. He’s never met anyone quit like you in all his years alive. “I believe those terms are acceptable.”

You give him a wink, “Good. See you then.” And with that do you crash your lips against his for on more heated embrace before leaving one final kiss to his slender cheek and floating out of the cell you go. Stopping behind the glass to give your new lover one last fleeting look, “Miss me you prick.”

Loki smirks, “Always.”

[alexhogh7137]

The God and The Seer~

Ivar the Boneless×Hecate

Story Summary~After the Seers death, Ivar has been having visions of a woman. A very powerful woman, a witch. Ivar is connected to this witch in ways that he did not even think to be possible. Therefore in this story, Ivar sets out to find this witch-Hecate, to find out why he and you are connected. But once he does, he finds more than what he bargained for. I hope you enjoy!!

**Hecate meaning~the Goddess of Magic, Witchcraft and Necromancy

_____________________________________

The night of the Seer's death:

Ivar ordered his men to burn the remains of the seer, who has always told Ivar only bad, or never enough information. His whole life, he would tell Ivar that his life would mean only death, hatred and fear. Ivar only wanted to be king. A king that was feared but honored by his people, just as his father was. So when the Seer was ranting about the darkness that surrounded him and his brother's, he had enough, and put an axe through the middle of his forehead. He saw red and the redness grew darker and darker to where he saw no light, so he went through with it and not long afterwards, he had to come up with a plan to get rid of the body. Therefore, he ordered his men to take care of it. As he watched the remains burn into ash, he thought to himself, "what have I just done? Why did i do such a thing? What is Hvitserk going to say? No, he cannot find out. They must never find out what truly happened here."

That night, he went home and told his wife Freydis what he had done. He shared his reasoning, and because of the strong love she had for Ivar, she understood and promised to never share what he had done. But he knew that someone, somehow, would find out everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You awake for the first time in only the gods know how long, with a sharp pain in your head. In the center of you forehead to be specific. You place your hand over it, trying to ease the pain but it was no relief. You look down and your skin was filled with ash, as if you were burned but you were certainly not. Why have you been awoken? Your father placed a spell on you when you were young out of fear. Why has it been broken? And then it came to you. He must have been killed. Then, and right then, you saw him. You saw the whole thing as if you were there the entire time. You saw the man stand behind your helpless, already dying father and drive the axe into his skull. You screamed and as you screamed, you set the dungeon you were in on fire. You walked out unscathed and filled with rage.

Your father could see the future. He had a gift that was passed down to you. But what he did not know, was that you would be much stronger than he could have ever imagined. You could see what he could see but much, much more. He could be near a person and see their futures, but since his eyes were removed by men who feared him when he was a child, that was all he could do. But you, you had powers that ran throughout the entirety of your body. Starting from your head: you can control minds, read them and see futures. Following to your fingertips: you can manipulate things around you, move them, detroy them, etc. You can also start fires with your fingertips. That is one of the reasons why your father put a spell on you because you became so deadly, so dangerous to others around you that he could not allow you to be around him. Lastly, your feet. The fire can go down to your toes, leading to you burning everything you walked on. So you didn't blame or hate your father for placing you in a deep sleep. You could not control your powers and you knew that well. He tried his best in regards to not be able to see, to train you. But it was no use. You only hurt him, and that broke you. He never had a temper. But your mother, who was a witch, had the temper. She passed away when you were very young so you have very little memory of her. However, your father never failed to tell you how much you reminded him of her. He told you stories of her, weeks before he put you to sleep, of the adventures they had together before you were born. As as you slept, you dreamt of her. Her beauty, her fierceness, and she spoke to you.

"Do not fear men, Hecate. They will not understand you, only fear you. But you can destroy them with the twitch of your finger. But only do that if you have reason too, my love."

"Do not do what i did, Hecate. Do not become me."

"You need to learn your own powers. Control them, feel them and learn how they release from your limbs. Learn everything and then use your powers for good, Hecate. Not for bad, like i did.."

"You are so beautiful, my love. I do not want that beauty to fade with hatred, as mine did."

You remember those words and your eyes fill with tears. Not only from feeling grief from the loss of your mother, but the anger you feel from the vision you saw of your fathers death. You looked up at the clouds in the sky and words come out of your mouth.

"Odin, please tell me what to do. I am so lost. My pa-parent are gone, I'm all alone! Please tell me what i can do." It took a few minutes before a shadow formed infront of you. A dark mist appears and you had no fear. Not even a single second of it. The features started to become clearer and it was indeed, your mother. You fell to your knees with relief and instantly thanked Odin for delivering you your mother.

"Oh my sweet girl, do not cry, i am here now."

"How are you..here?"

"Odin told me that you needed me, my poor girl. We heard your weeping."

"Is father with you now?"

"Yes Hecate. He has arrived in Valhalla. How did you know he was gone?"

"I saw his death. I saw it as if i was there when it happened. It was horrible mother."

"Mm, i was burdened with that as well. I am sorry Hecate, but it is a wonderful gift as it is also a burden. But-" she lowers herself to you and cups your cheeks. Making you cry from her touch. "I do not have long child, i need to tell you something."

"Please help me, anything, i will do it!"

"Hecate, listen to me. I can feel the rage writhe within you. But you must ignore this hatred for that man Hecate-"

"WHAT?!"

"He is a weak man and did not know what he was doing! Your father was on his deathbed, Hecate. If anything, that man did your father a kindness."

"He shouted 'no' before he died-"

"I know he did-"

"Then how it that a kindness, he did not want to die-"

"Yes he did, Hecate! Do not argue! Your destiny is to not kill him." You scuff and walk away from her in disgust. Your mother isn't suprised and just slowly gets up from her crouching position.

"Father is gone and now you are telling me not to avenge him.. is that what i am hearing?"

"Yes, my dear. Like it on not, your destined to be with him." You felt sick to your stomach.

"MOTHER!?"

"Odin has showed me your future Hecate. Once you meet this man, you will be with him...forever."

"That..will never happen!"

"Okay. My love-" she walks up to you and hugs you tightly. You inhale deeply, feeling the warmth of her touch hover over your chest and back. "I am sorry that you are mad Hecate. But i promise you, you will be happy one day."

"Mom i-"

"I must go, Odin is calling me home." You fall back down to your knees but she catches you.

"I don't know what to do without you!"

"You have lived without me since you were two years of age, Hecate. You have and you will thrive in this world without me."

"You didn't tell me what i was asking for.."

"But i did, my love. Do not hate, do not harm him. He only did what he thought was right. Now, pick yourself up and learn your own self. I love you, my daughter."

"I love you mother." And within seconds, she evaporates. And you look down at your hands, wishing that she did not fade away. You thought about everything that she said and it made you confused and more frustrated than you were before she appeared. How could you possibly love the man that killed your father in cold blood? You do not know as of now. All you do know, is that you need to familiarize yourself with your powers again and find this man.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Few days after the Seer's death:

Hvitserk went to the tent where the Seer stayed in all day and all night. He was gone and he knew instantly that his brother Ivar was behind it. So he confronted him and of course, he denied that the Seer was even dead. But Hvitserk knew, and he whispered to Ivar "i know. I know.." and walks out of Ivar's chambers. Ivar stomach formed knots and he felt scared that his brother would rat him out to his people. He looks at Freydis and intertwines his fingers with her own.

Freydis "Ivar what is it?"

Ivar takes a deep breath, "I need to fix this. I need to find a new Seer. That is the only way to prevent my people from turning on me."

Freydis "What are you going to do? Where will you even go?!"

Ivar "I do not know. Not yet, but i will. And once i do, i must bring him to Kattegat." Freydis nods but still looks concerned. "What is it?"

Freydis "I don't know. I just do not think this will end well."

Ivar chuckles, "Does it ever for me?"

Freydis "No, but at least you'll have me through it all." He nods and kisses her lips softly. Little did they know that Freydis would be dead before the next season began. But you did. You knew it well. You saw the woman in your dreams that night. You saw a rope mark around her neck and you woke up from that dream with a smile on your face. Why? Because you could see him holding her lifeless body in his arms and you knew he had loved her. Once she is dead, you will appear. Until then, you will train.

@hvitserkmarcosource @youbloodymadgenius @ivarsgoddess @readsalot73 @heavenly1927 @saldelys @herestherealproblem

[a-libra-writes]

okay so like what i thought of was basically it’s a stark reader(robb’s twin) like in the hc, BUT up until theon left to go recruit his father they had a kind of unspoken thing going on and we’re clearly in love with each other just neither one had the guts to say it(theon would even pick out whores specifically bc they looked like the reader) and so(like in the hc) roose bolton captures her and their direwolf at the red wedding to marry her to ramsay. who subsequently becomes slightly(but let’s be honest this is ramsay) obsessed with her, and one day her direwolf makes its way into the kennels only to find and lay next to theon. it refuses to come out and even snarls in a protective way if someone tried to get theon out of the kennel. the servants decide that the best way to get the direwolf out is with its owner, reader and theon have a ready reunion and he kind of snaps out of reek for a short period of time. butttttt then ramsay gets jealous and chaos ensues :))))) hope you like it!!!! yeah it is kind of based off of the hc you did lol

first of all how dare you anon???????? i thought about this ask way too much today and it HURTS

So lets start with this. Theon was ten when he was taken from his family, he’s witnessed his home be invaded and the castle walls destroyed. Heard about his older brothers being murdered. May have seen their heads on spikes. Taken from his sweet mother, and older sister, probably didn’t see his uncles and father??? there sure as shit weren’t any nice goodbyes.

Yes Ned didn’t approve of this whole thing, but he saw it as a better alternative to another war coming up. Robert saw it as mercy; he wasn’t destroying the whole Greyjoy line or burning their keep to the ground.

So with all of that, he arrives in Winterfell, where it’s freezing. Travelled with the man that may have led to the deaths of his older brothers. Meets this man’s wife, who clearly isn’t happy he’s there. And meets this man’s children, who are young and just staring at him and his strange clothes. 

Now that we’ve got that out of the way....

I really like Theon and Robb’s friendship, and how it almost progressed to the level of Jon and Robb’s brotherhood, but not quite. I think that’s because he’s older by several years in the books, and while Jon is “at least” Stark, Theon is not. He’s a hostage. A potential danger. Catlyn likely doesn’t want her oldest anywhere near him but if Robb is going off to play with the Ironborn boy, why can’t Y/N? She’ll sneak out if she has to! She wants to talk to him and ask him questions. He’s annoyed by a stupid girl trailing him around, and tells her as much. 

I like to think they have an annoying sibling relationship for a while, and Y/N is very fascinated with him, but she also has a great deal of empathy because she starts to realize his situation. She’s still a child, but she knows he was taken from his family and struggles to understand why her father would do that. Ned tries to explain it to her, but I think it’ll always feel wrong to her, so even if Theon teases her and she teases back, she’s always nice to him even when her mother tries to discourage them socializing.

And of course, my favorite trope.  They get older and start to realize feelings, she grows into a beautiful lady and still wants to hang out with him and Robb. She still smiles at him during feasts and comes to watch him practice at archery and still glares at anyone who dares insult him. “You’ll do well to keep your words to yourself, especially where it pertains to matters you don’t understand,” She’ll sneer at lordlings who come in to gawk at the Ironborn. Theon loves it when she talks “like a lady” to annoying guests and lords. She speaks far more casually with him and her siblings. 

His crush is intense!!!! It’s so much. It hits him early and puberty + Theon brain just makes it worse. Like you said, he absolutely picks whores that look similar to her - I HC he generally seeks whores at an early age bc 1) thats just an OK thing to do for young men in Westeros and 2) he’s really lacking in physical affection and acceptance in general. 

He has no chance with a Lady Y/N Stark. Not a single fucking chance, but he still daydreams. When he was younger especially, when he hoped the Starks would accept him, when he thought he’d never return home - maybe they’d see him like a son, maybe, if he was good. Maybe if he was good enough, she’d ... but no. That’s all pipe dreams. The older he gets, the more he knows it, but knowing doesn’t help the bitterness.

I think it’d be even worse if Y/N saw him in a more romantic light than a familial or platonic one. The yearning. The pain!! The shared glances after touching each other’s hands, wondering if the other person knows or cares as much, but never knowing for sure because how the hell can you ask that? How would it ever be appropriate? 

There’s so much to this. Ramsay just adds a dozen layers of angst and complications 😂

Obviously Theon’s betrayal and “death” would break her heart, among other things. The war is not kind to the Starks. She has a lot of pain by the time she’s married to Ramsay. 

Also YOU’RE BREAKING MY HEART like the idea of her direwolf sniffing out Theon, even after all that, or just seeing him and instantly curling up. Theon’s half asleep, half delirious, but he feels the warmth of the fur and for a wild moment believes it’s Grey Wind. He feels the wet nose on his face and the wolf gently licks his wounds. This isn’t the hounds that snap at him and bring their fleas. The wolf curls up with him, and it’s probably the most peaceful sleep Theon’s had in months.

Later Y/N realizes her direwolf has been gone for hours and searches for it in a panic. She doesn’t want to go into the dungeons, she hates them, hates the sounds and the smells coming from them, but she doesn’t know where else to look. She’s sick to her stomach wondering why her wolf is down there, what if Ramsay -? No. He wouldn’t... would he?

And yes, Ramsay’s men have been trying to get Theon out per their master’s orders and can’t. The direwolf refuses. Theon has to crawl out on his own, all bones and scars and scabs and wounds, and the wolf sticks to his legs. Shows its teeth to anyone even looking at him. That’s when Y/N hears the commotion and comes down, she has no idea who this old man is - then... Recognition. Terrifying, heart-wrenching recognition.

When she holds him, she’s not sure who falls down first. It could be either of them; Theon from weakness and shock, her from heartache and relief. And he’s Theon again. He says his name, and her’s, and it’s hard for him to think straight and get the words out. But there is I’m sorry.

She demands an explanation from Roose. There’s no point in hiding it now. And she turns on Ramsay for it, and lord knows he won’t feel guilty about it. I feel like Theon would get slightly better treatment now, both because the direwolf is at his heels as much as Y/N’s and now she has a close eye on him. If anything else happens, she’s going to raise hell in the Dreadfort. All the anger and fire and outrage has been stoked again. Ramsay is not pleased with any of these developments.

And yeah if she and Theon had romantic feelings, this is about to get much more complicated :^)