#also i haven't been active lately oops! very sorry

[simplysolo]

quick shadowheart profile to test out my new drawing tablet (please ignore the shitty image quality it was either this or i wouldn't have posted at all)

[sparatus]

What oc do you not talk about enough? Tell me about them but I require also to know what their favorite color and prehistoric creature. Thank you!

ohhh so many really, lemme think who's a good one [rifles through catalog] ..... man i haven't really talked about rise & reign much since i made this new account huh. okay kids let's talk about my dumb stupid son axilus :)

this big beefy dumb idiot is axilus madelivio (bold is a link, there's a size comparison ;) ):

(i know he's big and beefy but if you thirst over him i'm legally allowed to kill you. his story starts when he's like 16 this is not a thirst character he's just a big boy)

he's actually my very first mass effect oc and the reason i got into it!! my partner @lightspeedpowerpunk started playing m.e. alllll the way back in senior year of high school (2014!!!) and texted me about the m.e. au he was thinking of for some of our existing ocs, and asked me to look up turians and give him some design ideas for a turian expy of one of our original verse characters, axel madsen, and while i was doing that i just kinda... fell in love with the species and wanted to play the games, and then eli published the first chapter of an oc fic featuring axilus and his (eventual) quarian boyfriend thie'haasn, and now here we are 8 years later,

he's also going to appear in in the land of giants in a couple story arcs, can't wait to force everyone to see my actual favorite child, sorry matteo

(more under the cut cause this got. rEALLY LONG OOPS,)

axilus is a big boy, and a sweetheart, but not really a gentle giant; he's very much large and in charge, and isn't afraid to use both his immense strength and biotics to get rid of people annoying him, lmfao. his biotics manifested late, when he was 16. he'd been latent until then, until an accident during what was supposed to be his squad's last training mission activated them (read: thie detonated his own biotics in ax's arms to save them from incoming batarians) and sent everything a little loopy. he was already not doing hyper-amazing in the military, and his commanding officer saw nothing but misery in his future if he was shoved into the cabals, so she pushed him out to go adventuring with thie instead before the transfer could be completed.

considering ax's dad aephis and grandfather octyrus are both high-ranking officers in the army and navy respectively, this uh.... didn't go over well :D

after a bunch of other events that are detailed in mine and eli's series rise & reign that we swear we're planning to rewrite soon don't read it god the 2014 humor and "these authors need therapy actually" jumps RIGHT out, he and thie end up becoming captains of their own pirate-slash-mercenary crew, favored activity being hunting slavers for fun and profit. then All That Shit happens in 2186 [reaper war or cerberus trying to start galactic war, depending on canon] and they decide to retire, passing the ship on to their longtime friend raik gemeng and settling on palaven in ax's mom's family home in zouklos [tropical jungle + farmland nation on the southern continent] with their big gaggle of a family: along with thie he also marries his childhood best friend freiya and has a son with her, they have two asari children fathered by one of them each and mothered by a couple different asari friends, they adopt some war orphans who latched onto them, it's a full house.

all the while during their travels, axilus also works on steadily getting his doctorate in turian history, specializing in pre-spaceflight palavenian history and a sprinkling of cultural anthropology. once they retire, he gets a teaching job with the university he was studying with. freiya is an army officer and thie ends up working with c-sec, so axilus is the one home with the kids a lot, and if his parents or grandparents aren't available to take care of them while he's off teaching, they'll sometimes come in to class with him and steal the show.

his father aephis is a spec ops officer with the army, and his mom sephira is an astronautical engineer with TEC specializing in mass effect propulsion drives. she was even the project lead for the tantalus drive core project! he has an older brother, tollak, who's autistic and goes into law and later politics, eventually becoming the new councilor once sparatus retires after the war and the thessian beacon conspiracy have been mopped up.

when thie first wakes up after ax and his squad saved him, he meets axilus properly for the first time... and mistakes him for councilor sparatus, whom ax looks nothing like, because thie, a quarian, can't tell turian markings apart properly and also we hc quarians have reduced color vision so thie straight up cannot tell that the two are different colors. this is actually a meta joke, as when i was helping design ax, again with zero knowledge of who any of these characters were, i picked sparky's picture of the wiki and said "here, like this" for the color. the end result was more maroon than sparky's true brown, but eli threw that in the fic as a wink-wink-nudge-nudge to my design notes, and now we just. hang onto it, for comedy reasons. it is in fact funnier the less alike they actually look, thie's just colorblind.

..... and then, after that joke was already written and published, we went "haha hey what if" and then decided sparky and ax are, in fact, related. they're first cousins once removed. axilus's father aephis is ierian sparatus's cousin, their mothers corinn and meana are sisters, ax's great-grandma and sparky's grandma are the very same person, the one and only calvetana sparatus. hilariously, i probably never would have started really considering sparky as a character if he didn't have that one minor joking connection to my big dumb son. so, really, everything about my work to date with the sparatus clan and "the council does have a good reason to not believe you actually" defense is axilus's fault.

he's a sweetheart and usually the level head to thie's impulsivity, and honestly a lot smarter than he gives himself credit for. he's just not good at math! it's fine! he has computers to do it for him! his mommy is an engineer and he thinks he's dumb cause he doesn't understand what a derivative is, but she doesn't know how he remembers specific dates and years in history and why they're significant so it's fair. sephira loves and supports her sons and is secretly very happy when ax retires from piracy and comes back to palaven, she doesn't want her babies in danger even if they ARE absolute fucking tanks of drakes.

his favorite color is red, even if tragically it doesn't look great on him as a main color thanks to his being maroon, and i haven't put a lot of work into prehistoric palavenian wildlife (the megafauna in tiirtias technically count but they're very much still alive, lol) but i think he'd go apeshit for sabretooth cats, because they look very similar to how i imagine shatha!! and he'd think it's super cool how animals from completely different parts of the galaxy can still evolve roughly the same way, and then the theorizing on why terran sabretooth cats went extinct while the palavenian shatha variants survived would begin,

thank you for asking!!!! i love my big dumb baby i swear a r&r rewrite is in the plans so i can force you all to know my ocs against your will y'all can see the story unfold with better writing and updated lore, we just have to reread and make a plan for what's getting fixed

[ladyseidr]

once again stealing the whole "answering headcanon memes from memes i haven't been sent" from @florietiae because i love it <3

does your muse have freckles? if so, where are they placed? does your muse like their freckles, or wish they had some? ( x )

yes, and they're very obvious lmao. he definitely has full body freckles, but they're most prominent on his back, shoulders, thighs, and across his cheeks + nose. he generally doesn't care one way or the other that he has them, but he is not immune to either A. being made to feel embarrassed abt them if someone's a dick toward him, or B. getting flustered if someone says they likes them

is your muse a morning person or a night person? ( x )

night person ( are we surprised? ) both for Getting Into Trouble reasons when he's a teen and just in general. despite the aforementioned trouble, he actually finds nighttime relaxing and enjoys staying up late, particularly with company. however, sometimes his thoughts can get a little loud at night when he's alone. still, he is so not a morning person. good luck getting him to get out of bed in the morning lmao

does your muse believe people are innately good or innately bad? why do they believe this? ( x )

oh, he definitely believes most people are innately bad. eventually ( late 20's-30's ) he probably challenges this view, but not before then. between his parents, himself, and the people he chooses to surround himself with ( oops sorry michael, phoebe, and jeff ), he just. . . doesn't really have reason to think otherwise. don't get me wrong, boy lives in CRAZY cognitive dissonance when it comes to michael ( "i get to see the good, affectionate, softer side of him which means he's a good guy even if he beats the shit out of people and also bullies his brother for no discernable ( to rory ) reason" ) but UHHHHHH that doesn't last for, like. obvious reasons.

like genuinely how do i explain that he falls for michael, convinces himself that michael is good and safe, would lowkey do anything for michael, and then ends up complicit in evan's death. i'm not absolving rory of anything, to be clear, because he went along with it just fine, but y'know. what if they just both fucked each other up REAL bad??

but also like his parents do suck. really. dangling them at william as i speak.

how did your muse come to realize their romantic and sexual orientations? was it difficult to accept? are they proud of who they are? ( x )

okay, i joke abt his denial a lot ( as a queer person who def went through a period of like. . . the kind of denial that sounds fictional LMAO ) but here's a more serious discussion:

obviously i've discussed plenty ( including in his bio ) that he falls for michael, but in terms of his personal process of accepting it. . . it's slow going. he's 100% in denial until the moment he literally kisses michael and, let's be real, there was crazy romantic tension before then. then he just panics and starts trying to prevent aaaaaany sort of realization. that's where all the "it's just experimenting," "it doesn't mean anything," "i'm straight, you're just the exception" jokes keep coming from ( they're not really jokes lmaoooo ). he's like 0.1 seconds away from "no homo-ing" directly after a makeout session. he will fly off the fucking handle if anyone "accuses" him of being gay, especially if it's intended homophobically, but honestly period. this includes michael, the guy he's actively lowkey dating-without-admitting-it. okay, tbh i'm laughing at this like yes it's sad but imagine arguing that you're straight with the guy you kiss 40 times a day.

he's so close to accepting that he's gay ( considering he's finally accepting he's in love with michael, even if he hasn't Said The Words yet ) when The Bite happens and, uh. heartbreak and self-hatred just makes him tamp that realization back down for a few years. once he moves out, he's finally able to process and accept his orientation, though i wouldn't say he's at the point of feeling pride. i think that'll probably take several more years to. . . just be himself. i do actually think he's the type to eventually be comfortable enough to be openly gay ( like jayne ) despite the times and risks despite everything prior fkdshfadsl

[dreamdropsystemarchive]

I am wishing for the best! I hope everything goes well when y'all tell her.

And of course! Good vibes are always nice. Thank you guys for the positive energy! Sending some more good vibes to you guys! ✨ I hope Chocolat is doing well too!

I wish people would be kinder too. Fake claiming and invalidating helps nobody. I believe you guys aren't faking! Each system is different, and each system is valid! You guys are valid!

It sucks when people don't take you seriously too. Nobody knows what's going on in someone else's head, so it doesn't make sense how people just brush it off when people are struggling.

And ooh! Those sound cool! Cat ears and bunny ears.. I can see how they help!

Emotion wheels are useful, but they're hard to find. I tried finding a wheel with a lot on it, but I didn't find much. I found a few good ones though! Emotions are hard to understand, but I agree. The wheels are good for identifying feelings.

I hope they're feeling better now! But if not, then here's some more good vibes and support! ✨✨ Some days are very hard. I hope you guys were able to distract yourselves and watch some good anime!

I'm glad it helped them! Honestly I get that too. Hospitalization doesn't always help and being hospitalized is a scary thought. We shouldn't have to be afraid of being hospitalized for speaking our minds.

Aww! I'm glad I can help at least a little! I agree too. Positive interaction goes a long way especially when you're used to not being treated nice.

Thank you guys for the star! And of course! How are you guys feeling now?

-🌺

hii 🌺 anon!

we haven't got a chance to talk to her about the mania but she was in our med meeting today and got us to say we've fused. we worried she didnt believe so 😔 and we freaked out but she said she did and fusing is positive.. and that she beleives us.. rip us

thank you for the energy! right now its me and Andy rn, Tobias as cocon ealier. we might need to switch soon cause im a bit overwhelmed.. haha sending you positive energy aswell.. :>

thank you sm.. youre very kind. we appreciate you support. we deal enough with thinking were faking people saying we're faking doesnt help..

yes! we agree. we should believe in people.. it hurts when people don't believe you or act like they do. also our brain makes it auto that people dont believe us so we ask about it over and over.. it sucks..

yes! we love our ears. we deal with phantom body parts aswell. wings and ears and such

i know some emotion wheels! hope these can help. we well look for more if needed

we did end up distracting ourselves Andy was out most of the day and didnt talk to much people. but hopefully were gonna be back to being active. so sorry for the late reply. we worried at least 1 friends so oops haha.. i was in headspace for a while.. mania episode ended. probs depression is gonna hit but cause 🤪 yeah..

it is scary.. we get that. we have a lot of hospital trauma... we're scared to get hospitalized again.. weve been hospitalized 10+ times and all of them were traumatic and we have mutiple alters that hold hospital trauma.. im glad i dont remember much tbh the flashbacks i do get are horrorific

you do help. getting nice asks and positive interaction is always nice. thank youn sm 🌺 anon. youre so kind. 😭😭

a lots been going on but i feel pretty neutral/okay?? Andy feels okay aswell. I'm not sure how long this feeling will last and we're scared its gonna cause a big depression.. wdk how it will affect the system Magenta isnt manic anymore either. how are you doing?

- Shane and Andy