#also i realised i never draw my ships kiss :((

[smolbonbon]

Valentines doodles ✨️

Happy Valentine's Day!

Closeups (and me rambling):

Solar/Moon my beloved ship. My brainrot is fr and I have been drawing them A LOT.

I like to think that if Solar gets drunk Moon mostly takes care of him, does he need painkillers? Coming right up! Does he have water? Yes, right next to him. Where does he sleep? If he isn't too wasted to walk up the stairs then in Moon's bedroom (Moon would sleep on the couch).

Moon is very protective when it comes to the people he loves. Aanddd even though Moon is not much better than Solar he does scold him for letting himself get wasted.

I HC that Castor and Pollux have different ways of showing affection. Castor prefers to take things slow (think of Maid Sama the protagonist and her crush kiss in the final episode).

I didn't see much interaction between them but I think Solar would be the first one who gets a crush on them. Ruins silly tactics to cheer someone up or lighten a serious tension is something that pulled Solar's interest. Even though Ruin's silly antics they can be serious if needed. Solar can also never tell what they're up to.

I also HC that Ruin would randomly show up and (mostly) scare the living lights out of Solar. (I honestly would be interested what you guys love about that ship)

Sun and Eclipse? Oh boy. Eclipse doesn't know shit about love so he is very insecure when it comes to giving his beloved presents. It must be perfect, everything must be done nicely and pretty he can't disappoint his lover.

But to his luck, Sun shows a lot of joy when he gets presents and if Eclipse wouldn't be so easily overwhelmed by the affection (the grumpy Dorito man never experienced love and affection) he would drown Eclipse in kisses.

I feel like they would have a slow burn since both of them have a lot of crises (like abandonment, rejection fear, insecurities etc etc.). Sun would first be very sceptical of him actually wanting help but after time he realises he does want to change and Sun would start to help him. (Aaa ok enough of rambling perhaps I'll talk about it more in the future)

(I want to draw Sun/Eclipse more it was so much fun to draw them.)

[bluemirrorangel]

Dead poets' society ship headcanons feelings realisation + confessions 

these are mainly modern headcanons.

Anderperry:

 SO MUCH PINING

Todd kind of had a thing for Neil from the start but thought it was just admiration  until the scene where Neil promises to take care of him. 

And Neil always found Todd interesting but realised his feelings when Todd improv’d his poem in class.

I feel like they would have kissed after the play if they had the chance 

Wrote each other christmas cards over the winter break with sickeningly sweet messages in them.

Crazy amounts of pda, nothing huge but they're always touching each other; holding hands, arms thrown around the others neck, leaning on each other like they don’t have their own spines.

knarlie:

Charlie’d  had a crush on Knox ever since they met but assumed it would just go away naturally… it did not

Only realised how much he liked him when Knox met Chris

Tried so hard to be a  supportive best friend, would give Knox a pep talk and then go to his dorm and scream into his pillow 

The longing went crazy

Knox didn’t figure out he liked Charlie until after his relationship with Chris ended.

The moment he realised he liked Charlie he decided to woo the ever loving shit out of him.

Confessed to him at a dead poets society meeting.

The fun couple™ 

Mitts: 

Never got together officially just kind of figured out that they liked each other simultaneously and decided to go with it

Childhood friends

Always together

None of the other poets know about their relationship because they’ve always been like that

Only figure out how much they need each other when they graduate and get into  separate colleges 

Always paired up in every subject in school

They work better together because each one makes up for the other’s weakness

Chameron: 

As much as I love the idea that Cameron and Charlie used to be close pre-canon,

I personally believe their relationship has always been strained.

Cameron idolises Neil, because Neil was the only one who really made an effort to include him so Cameron would try and hang out with him as much as possible, that’s how he ended up meeting Charlie

Cameron has always liked Charlie and Envied him for how free he is (In my opinion Cameron has one of the biggest cases of eldest daughter syndrome i’ve ever seen.)

Charlie and Cameron become roommates and despite how badly they treat each other and how mean Charlie gets Cameron still does his hardest to take care of Charlie (i.e he helps Charlie with trigonometry even after Charlie’s spent the better part of an hour mocking him.) because he can not STAND the idea of being disliked by anyone.

Gets frustrated easily by Charlie because he feels like he’s wasting his potential.

Cameron realises how much he cares about Charlie because of the saxophone scene, he was genuinely taken aback by how talented and sincere he was being about something. 

Charlie has no idea he likes Cameron

 He's always been a little fixated on Cameron and  what started as thinly veiled concern quickly became resentment at Cameron’s refusal to have fun.

While Charlie makes fun of Cameron to get a reaction out of him it’s also to prove to himself that Cameron is still a teenager and not just some uptight golden boy with an inability to think for himself, he gets a strange sense of satisfaction from making Cameron loosen up and act human for once.

The closest they’re dynamic has ever come to banter was the back and forth they had  when Charlie told the other poets that his parents made him take clarinet lessons when he was younger.

It isn’t  until Cameron snitches on them that Charlie figures  his shit out, why Cameron’s betrayal  hurt him more than anyone else and that’s why he punches him.

Charlie knows he’ll get expelled but he does it anyway because he can handle liking an uptight, overly cautious, teacher's pet but he draws the line at sharing a room with a traitor, draws the line at loving a coward.  

Cameron doesn’t pine he yearns, yearns for someone he barely knew

He spends the rest of his years at Welton alone, grieving the death of one of his best friends and mourning the end of something that never even started.

The only way these two could ever have a happy ending together is if they went to therapy and if  Welton had a reunion.

leave a ship or fandom suggestions and I’ll do headcanons for them if you want :)

[darklinaforever]

Girl, you are so insanely misogynistic, when a woman is married to a violent and abusive man, she’s completely allowed and justified in cheating on him.

You can support creeps, stalkers, rapists and pedos but draw the line at cheating, lmao.

Literally, Daemon in F&B never abused Rhaenyra emotionally and physically.

The choking scene in 1x10 is completely OCC.

But you buy it anyway because it justifies your hatred of Daemon. Once again, you'll buy whatever hatred against Daemon the show gives and you'll be happy.

Then, like I said not only is the 1x10 scene is OCC but it also demonstrates the terrifying habit of the screenwriters to amplify the violence suffered by women in the GRRM universe without any good script-valid reason, in addition to adding scenes of various abuse and variety non-existent in the basic source material, all for pure shock value on the viewer.

This aspect is criticized as much as the fact that Daemon having strangled Rhaenyra makes no sense with the first 8 episodes of HOTD in relation to the Daemyra relationship, in addition to the fact that it never existed in Fire and Blood, so the source material from which this show is taken.

We are filled with the fact that Daemon strangling Rhaenyra makes no sense with his character and the Daemyra relationship, therefore being OCC in HOTD, and not being present in the source material either. So a pure free invention for the shock of the screenwriters who adds non-existent violence compared to the source material and consequently the empires to stimulate the shock of the viewer.

At no time do we justify Daemon's behavior. On the contrary. But you are unable to understand that.

How the hell does pointing out these crucial things make me a misogynist ? On the contrary, it is HOTD's treatment of female characters that is misogynistic.

I didn't know that it was feminist to add gratuitous violence towards female characters, so you teach me something...

Then, if we are all so against Rhaenyra cheating on Daemon, it has nothing to do with the fact that she is a woman, but simply because once again it does not exist in the source material. And no, Daemon cheating on Rhaenyra in F&B has never been proven and we are just as against Daemon cheating on Rhaenyra.

The strangling scene Daemyra, and the kiss scene between Rhaenyra & Mysaria are just as OCC as each other. We criticize both. Neither should have happened. It's not complicated to understand.

On the other hand, when did I support stalkers, worse rapists ?! (While I literally made a recent post again to take down characters who commit rape...) You have so little argument that you have to lie to be able to send me a request ? You're pitiful. The same thing about pedophiles. When did I support up with pedophiles ? Unless you're trying to say that Daemon is a pedophile and... you're still wrong.

Oops.

Oh and if it's because of my ships such as Sessrin, Sareth or Sebaciel, my god, I have already explained from what angle I ship Sebaciel and that this relationship or Sareth and Sessrin does not were not pedophile ships :

Oh and in case someone tells me the stupidity about Daemon being a groomer again :

Have a good day, you who complete yourself in your stupidity and your wickedness.

[middlingmay]

First Line Analysis

Rules: post the first lines of up to 10 of your last fics/chapters posted on AO3 or your WIPs and try to draw some conclusions.

I should have foreseen this @joeyalohadream - but thanks for the tag :) ! I've chosen the first line of the first chapter for any multi-chaptered fic - except from That Ol' Devil Called Love. Because I've put more effort into that sucker than any of the others combined. But there's still 10 in total so :)

For some conclusions: This was interesting! I definitely noticed somethings I hadn't paid attention to before. Like when more than one character is involved, I now know I prefer to establish relationships from the very beginning. I also write more than I realised from Gale's POV, when I find Bucky much easier to write.

I have also never noticed that my first lines are definitely meant to work in the context of the wider opening section (the first paragraph or so). I use humour or suggestion to catch the reader's attention sometimes - but nowhere near as much as I thought I did! Some of them I really like on their own, but most of them I like the way they work with the rest of the opening text in the fic.

Mistaken Identity

Ostensibly, this little get together was a send off for Bucky, who was being shipped off to Thorpe Abbotts in England thanks to his new and entirely unwanted position as Air Executive. 

Five times the Buckies were nearly caught

The only feeling better than flying was John Egan fucking his tongue into Gale’s mouth.

Home run on campus

There were many things Gale was proud to do in the name of the US Airforce. 

Shoulda kissed him

He shoulda kissed him.

Expecting

"I think we might be pregnant."

Gale Cleven Never Learned to Flirt

Gale managed to reach his mid-twenties without ever flirting.

That Ol' Devil Called Love

Ch 1: “D’you think you’re a sinning man, John?” Ch 2: It was a shame the race was at night. Ch 3: Gale wondered why Marge was still his friend. Ch 4: Gale had never felt like this before.

Not tagging anyone this time!

[tgtbata]

tagged by @nigeltde-fic to art-ify these questions for writers and i would never deny her:

How many works do you have?

if i estimated correctly, i have over 350 posts with at least one drawing each on this tumblr account. which gave me a heart attack tbh, that's so many haha. there's some more my art floating around the internet elsewhere like on the terrebus account.

What fandoms do you draw for?

the main one currently is supernatural, before that it was the terror and before that it was football (the soccer kind) rpf. but i still do all of 'em! there are some others i play with like sherlock holmes, fdtd or mtw.

What are your top 5 drawings by notes?

using a random internet tool to rank posts:

dean/cas phallic angel blade (2492 notes)

sam/dean rebar kiss (1569 notes)

possum!dean (1510 notes)

blanky & tuunbaq dinner date (1492 notes)

dean with tattoos (1475 notes)

conclusion: big destiel still rules tumblr

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i usually do when it feels like something directed at me, like asks/dms or replies on twitter and tumblr. not so much when it's tags on tumblr or qrts on twitter - those feel more like the other person is talking into the void and not to me directly lol

What is a piece of art you drew with the angstiest ending?

hard to define 'ending' in the context of art - it supposes a sort of narrative structure not every of my drawings has. maybe this one. because, in the words of the rolling stones, you can't always get what you want.

What's the piece of art you drew with the happiest ending?

i guess this defines happy ending but i also had to think of this one, just because i can hallucinate the story that it took for them to get to that cocktail sippin' ending.

Do you get hate on art?

yes, sometimes lol i've had people fighting wars in my twitter replies when i posted cas/jack art. wah wah wah he's his dad. wah wah wah they're brothers. wah wah wah kill yourself. ridiculous and irrelevant. i do still think fondly of some replies i get though, like the one that was in russian and said 'such a talent and only for the sake of lust... sad.'

Do you draw smut?

yeah, but it's one of the things i want to get better at.

Do you draw crossovers? What's the craziest one you've draw?

not really. i want to draw an spn/fdtd crossover but that's not super crazy

Have you ever had art stolen?

reposted without credit, if that counts.

Have you ever collaborated on art before?

yes, having one person do the lineart and one do the colouring. it's a fun exercise to make you consciously realise your own art processes

What's your all-time favorite ship?

wincest is up there, of course. holmes/watson is simply a staple. humboldt/bonpland because mtw shaped me in my adolescence. i don't like to define THEEE favourite though because there's different ships for different flavours and that's great.

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

does it count as a wip if i haven't even started creating it lmao! if yes - a longer story s4 sam/dean dean/cas piece set to dessa's 551. if that sounds insane, it's because it is.

What are your drawing strengths?

i think depicting connection between two characters and portraying a sense of want/love/doubt even through a distance between them.

What are your drawing weaknesses?

stiff poses and inability to draw without reference. also backgrounds and feet :(

First fandom you drew for?

football rpf. the reason i started drawing regularly at all haha

Favorite art you've drawn?

probably this one. it just... worked out, from idea to product, and it feels smooth and it makes me happy :)

thank u for tagging me, nige!!

[lookupthewordjokeinthedictionary]

Logan wanted to try drawing the Sides (+ himself) as well, so we now have his drawings to grace our presence

Let's get started (it will have our little bonus details, I never would've left you like this!!)

Our happy pappy Patton!! He heard Logan was gonna draw him so he missed no opportunity putting on Logan's glasses and posing right in front of him. Logan will be drawing everyone with very harsh lines, including Patton. More on his drawing style later though ;). Through his sketches, you can really tell what he deems more important for each side (in this case, it's Patton's smile) as he puts it in the very centre.

Moving on, we have our Prince Roman! Logan really wanted to accentuate (and place at the very centre) how self absorbed and lost in his imagination Roman is. He drew him kissing his sword because what better way to show the physical manifestation of ego of how unrealistic they are.

Virgil!! Logan took point about how Virgil draws himself smaller than all other sides (like in my first post about them all) and acted accordingly! I personally really love how they seem to understand each other very well and sympathize with each other's struggles. He drew him happily posing with his birthday cupcake, as he should!

Our reptillion repscallion is in the house! Can we acknowledge that Logan has Janus related trauma? We still have no idea what happened to him when Janus snatched him away in POF. So I took matters into my own hands and made Logan draw him as a disney villain. He has a sinister smirk, the infamous hook, his cape is flowing in the wind. Our Lord of the Lies is looking in the distance, slits for eyes. I think it there's one dark side that has managed to get under Logan's skin, it's Janus.

Look at how adorable Remus is!!! Hhhhh I love him and I'm sure Logan does too (you don't have to ship it but I ship it and that's that). He is shown eating his deodorant, a vacant expression as he calmly stares at the distance. Logan can understand that the Duke has no actual impact on him. He can (and will) figuratively undress him with logic. He is just a silly little guy after all.

Lastly we have Logan. He has a closed book in the centre of his sketch, which I find fascinating. I believe the book itself is a metaphor for all of the knowledge that he possesses, as logic, as the overseer of Thomas' language Centre, as the manager of Thomas' right arm (if I'm not mistaken). But the book is closed. The knowledge isn't only not being used as of this moment but it's closed, it's disregarded. Like Logan is being disregarded. Hence the look of hurt and disgust on his face. There is no use for him if knowledge has no power.

As for the harsh lines all over the place, this explanation will be a little long but I'll do my best to be coherent.

Logan is, as far my understanding of the canon goes, as war with himself. His whole arc consists of him realising his importance in the creative process. His job is not to only keep Thomas at check, but to also urge him to create things that are informative, coherent and hold intelligent value. As of right now, Roman is the only one who's handling the creative process (who's being censored by Patton) so the creative process is stuck in a family friendly, full of criticism and stagnant ideas sort of situation. Unless Thomas (and Roman) realise the importance of Remus and Logan in the process, the product will forever be incomplete.

So, you might have thought that Logan sketching the sides would be full of harsh, symmetrical lines, devoid of any character. But even though his appreciation for perfection can't go unnoticed (as it is a big part of who he is), I can't personally pretend like Logan wouldn't figuratively kill it at creating and drawing and writing and sculpturing and singing and acting and and and and...

Conclusion: Logan is precious and must be protected at all costs (also he should be given a little more power, he knows the sides almost as good as Janus and Patton do)

[vole-mon-amour]

3x10, a mix of everything, part 2.

Rebecca is Keeley's best friend. and Jack is a fucking liar. what the hell is going on this season? especially with Keeley's plotline?

Roy & Keeley holding hands and Jamie walking in the room? hello?

on the other point, Keeley deserves better than constantly pushing people around her on their way to growth. first Jamie (which, fine, it was necessary and he did all the work by himself and came out beautifully). then Roy (that I presume will realise his mistake and will become better and such). still, can Keeley finally have some happiness and sense of confidence and self-worth that doesn't depend on her love life and personal relationships?

people keep thinking about Jamie being the matchmaker for ot3, but to me rn it looks like it's gonna be Keeley. and i'm not sure if I like that they're using a woman to do that.

This is nice. I like this. Something about Keeley being Richmond's football team best friend and finally making it to Mae (while Ted and Beard been visiting her place since the day they arrived to UK).

Red Right hand while Roy walks in the building? I have Peaky Blinders flashbacks. an interesting use of that song, for sure.

I want what Ted and Beard have.

same, Trent, same. maybe this is gonna be Roy's colorful awakening era.

somebody save them.

it's not the first time we see Isaac with an earring, but we don't label him bisexual the way we do with Jamie. it's the attitude, really.

this is not even funny. how are they not supposed to be romantic? how? i don't even ship them you just rub this under my nose. platonic after the matchbook and supposed to be a mother? what IS this? i seriously have questions to the writers. can they make up their mind? bc one is gives to her by an ex lover and one is given to her by, according to writers, her brother from another mother. all i keep seeing is how they keep connecting Ted and Rebecca and not in a platonic way. there's no romantic chemistry between them for me, especially this season, but hello???? WHAT? IS? THIS? what are they trying to achieve?

you tell them.

rainbow <3

oh, don't start with that, as if it sends Roy on some righteous path back to Keeley. "hope it didn't cost too much" i'm so tired of that plotline.

Keeley is such a sweetheart and deserves so much better.

this is so bad. i feel for Rebecca.

oh, fuck off. not a good look is a room full of rich men that can make an influence but choose not to. even decide to charge more. and if we're talking politics for some reason, have you also seen other nations' government? even the mess that happens in UK, where you live? seriously, fuck off and take P*tin with you, maybe then it'll start looking better.

she learned that from Trent & you can't convince me otherwise. i LOVE the parallel. QUEEN.

POV: you're an only woman in the room of white rich old cis men and a black one. ew.

she gets it now. the power of Ted Lasso and Coach Beard.

i'm not sure what they're doing there with Rupert. redemption arc through Rebecca's words? why? forgiveness? also why? Rupert and Rebecca laughing together? what is going onnn??? AND then Rebecca hanging back Hockney aka the drawing Rupert gifted her? i'm confused.

"we just borrow them for a while" hello?? they keep connecting Rebecca to Ted???

i was screaming a lot of NO's as Rupert went for a kiss. I'm glad Rebecca stopped it. i was seriously scared for that moment. what a shitty person he is. you can never have that wonderful woman again. suffer and die in suffering, bitch.

no way Keeley has a glass wall in her bathroom???? also, what's with both of her exes coming to her house instead of calling, texting and facing her face to face? why ot3 if not ot3?

*peels my face off with skin and muscle* if you're not adding Jamie to that, I swear to the Outsider—

hell yeah <3

you suuuure?

[masschase]

15 and 16 for Casey for the Saints Row Boss ask meme thing 💙

Ooh thank you I'm excited to get these again!

Boss ask meme

15. Are there any small things about them in the canon that you've really run with in your headcanon?

This is a question I recall really wanting someone to ask me when I made this meme and it's taken so long I've forgotten half of what I wanted to say 🤣

I'm going to go with what I still remember though I'm sure there's way more. Everyone knows I'm canon's bitch by this point. When I started my fanfic I wasn't thinking Matt x OC, I was thinking Matt and The Boss.

So I spent hours on wiki reading about The Boss, combined with what I remembered from actually playing, working in elements of a fitting backstory where I could, and that somehow made Casey. I kind of didn't realise she was an OC until tumblr 😅

Anyway, here are some of the results of that memory/research:

Likes Jane Austen, and the Brontës(male Boss mentions reading Jane Eyre a load of times). That somehow became her quoting it when she's drunk and with a lot of research bc that's really not my thing, drawing parallels between Emma and Mr. Knightley and Casey and Matt(but there's the odd Mr. Darcy joke too). God the fact I bought the Jane Austen collection and the Prose Edda (where the story of Ragnarok is from) to ship these two is not normal of me.

Doesn't like talking about life before the Saints/daddy issues.

I've used the whole 'Playa was originally called Mikey/Mickey" thing by making her middle name Michaiła and therefore Mikki bring one of her pseudonyms.

Somewhat interested in Nyte Blayde after Matt's mission(she's actually the one who appears on his couch at the time she knows he watches one time).

The idea that she rambles when she's emotional, particularly in the romantic sense, and that all of her partners will at some point have to shut her up with a kiss because of it, comes directly from the GatBoss romance scene. In fact the idea that she's not always the best at initiating physical contact even though she really wants/needs it kind of grew from that, too.

The whole going to a massage parlor way too young thing; there's a whole scene with a time-travelling Matt and Johnny seeing her come out of there.

Being bad with tech bc there are a few mentions in different games about that.

Liking robots when she was 6 is something that comes up a few times. I also ran with the fact that she and Matt are the only ones who call it "the robot".

Her voice mentions a therapist at times. I used that for at least one of the reasons she mellows out over time, especially between 2&3.

Surreal jokes such as "Asha, that light had a family."

I saw on the wiki that Boss is supposedly 6'2"; I made her 5'9" with 5 inch heels.

The fact the Boss uses the heavy pistol a lot in cutscenes is why her gold .45 Fletcher became her signature weapon.

As I say, there's probably way more! I don't want to make this so long that no-one reads it!

16. Is there anything from the games you've drastically avoided or downplayed in your headcanon?

This one I did actually answer before, but to summarise:

She's cis and even with the whole "she looked like a boy" claims, I've never made her in SR1's character creator (I do love some of the in game outfits for her though), plus I pretty much hc her always having her SR3/4 voice, just a little higher/more timid in 1.

She never went to college (referencing voice lines) because she dropped out of HS, though she did do some online study when she had time.

At the time I also said I didn't fill out her sr1-3 life much, but I have started to do that bit by bit. One I didn't mention for some reason:

SR3/4 Boss seems kind of stupid at times. Casey's pretty sharp tbh. She spends years hating that people underestimate her intelligence, but eventually kind of comes to terms with the fact that she's smart and that makes her kind of downplay it instead.

Recently, there's been more I've wanted to downplay for example:

I don't really like that I wrote in the Cyrus Temple thing. I like to think that's way downplayed, if she did have surgery for that it was minor, although that remains the time she decoded to stop getting plastic surgery for every scar and injury.

While GOOH kind of had to happen for a lot of my hc, I don't think it was quite like that(I can tell you for a fact Dex was not there for a start!). OK that's moving more from Casey to general universe but still 😅

I feel like there's more for both answers, but I guess I can always reblog with them later 😊

[fairyringsandwings]

can you please share with us your writing tips (especially for beginners and stories for romance and smut).

also, can you share some tips on how to overcome anxiety and worrying on whether on not your should publish a story, especially if its a self-indulgent or ooc fanfic .

Hello Dear Anon!

I completely understand you having anxieties and worries over whether or not to publish your writings. It's quite scary putting your work out there for people to read. I actually still get very anxious before updating or publishing new stories. I go through a whirlwind of 'people are gonna hate this' and 'this is the chapter they realise how terrible a writer I am' and 'they're gonna abandon my story cause of how badly I wrote this chapter'. But, I enjoy writing, and every time there's always at least one person who likes the story too and that definitely makes it worth it to me.

For what it's worth, the majority of fanfic readers are kind and supportive, regardless of the writer's skills. I think over the 12 years I've been writing fics, I've maybe had 3 or 4 mean comments (and it's always been from anti-shipper/rival ship shippers who are only out to upset people and stir drama). Most people remember that fanfic is FREE and written by people of all writing levels, during their free time. No one can complain about it and most will only give you advice, tips, and criticisms if you ask for it in your author notes and most are very kind when doing so.

Whatever kind of fic you want to share, there is definitely someone out there who will love it! Don't worry about it being ooc. It's always fun and interesting to see different interpretations and sides of characters + you might be writing them more in character than you realise, but it's your nerves telling you otherwise. And a story can neeeever be too self-indulgent. My stories are all 100% self-indulgent! They are perfectly catered to my oddly specific likes - fanfics are just as much for their authors as they are for their readers.

As for writing advice, I don't really know what kind of advice to give, but I'll share with you some of the tips + resources others have given me which really helps me! :D

Descriptionary | Helping Writers Find The Words (wordpress.com)

This is an amazing site! It'll help you find ways to describe things like emotions, colours, environments and physical appearances. It'll also give advice on other aspects of writing like pacing.

I also use Grammarly to help me pick up spelling and grammar mistakes.

Always remember, your first draft of a chapter doesn't need to be perfect. It can be messy, mistake-ridden and filled with blanks or lines like *they fought*, *they kissed*, *something happens*. Just get that first draft down - the skeleton of the chapter, if you will - so you can go back and edit it, fixing the mistakes, fleshing it out, finding better word choices and filling in the parts you got stuck on. It's much easier once you get a draft down, no matter how messy and chaotic it is. If you get stuck, move on to the next part. You don't have to write it linearly. Having an ending in mind can also really help as it gives you a target to aim for.

Read lots and write whenever you can!

As for writing smut and romance, it's my fav things to write about but I really struggle with it as truth be told, I'm a sex-repulsed ace/aro who has never even kissed anyone xD So, I can't draw from experience and sex ed in my catholic school was pretty... um... well, not helpful. So, I turn to these links for guidance and quick help.

The Ultimate Guide to Writing Smut Fic by QuinnAnderson

How To Write A Kiss (Old Tumblr post. Original deleted. But it's got useful tips that I like to refer to)

Interesting Writing Words (Tumblr post)

Emotion Cheat Sheet (Tumblr Post)

If anyone has any writing advice, please feel free to share!

[magical-xirl-4]

From worst to best (or in your case, least awful), how would you rank all the sides of the Love Square?

Oooh jeez this will be interesting because I think my opinions on it have changed a lot.

I used to be cool with all sides of the square but since the show has devolved into what it is, I definitely like some less than others. Keep in mind, I haven’t watched the show since season 3 so I might be missing some info or be wrong. These are my subjective opinion too, it’s just how I feel about each so I’m looking the writing in all of them.

Adrinette

Because of what’s happened so far in the story, I can’t fucking stand this side. To me this ship represents the entire square so really I’m almost saying that hate the whole square, but it’s not exactly true. Adrinette is so frustrating because they canonised it without giving the audience the full satisfaction of the whole square being realised. What’s the point in the LS anymore if there’s no draw to it? Why are people still watching this show? Once again I haven’t kept up with the show since S3 so forgive me if I’m wrong but; didn’t the whole square flip at some point? So, Marichat were into each other but Ladrien was not? It rubs me the wrong way because it makes me dislike how they write Adrien even more: because it’s what Adrien wants, Marinette can finally date him, even though she literally got over him??

Anyway, I used to like this side of the square second most but now it just leaves a sour taste in my mouth. It has so many more problems but I don’t have much time to go into them.

Edit: from what I know now with season 5, they are lowkey abusive?!?! With Adrien/Cat never being mad at Marinette/Ladybug for messing up and always giving in and forgiving her and telling her she’s right?!?! Holy shit they just made him even more of a doormat because he’s in love with her. It genuinely sounds like a reaction an abused person would have with idolising their partner, and creating an imbalance. Not to mention she doesn’t actually love the Cat Noir side of him, according to Catwalker, That’s so upsetting and genuinely fucked up, the LS is literally fucked.

Ladynoir

I always felt very meh about this side, but I understood where it had its fans. It’s kind of a shame that this side was just totally shut down by recent developments but it also makes things awkward because, Maribug had feelings for Chat at some point and Adrichat had feelings for Ladybug. They’ve definitely had romantic tension together at some point but that’s all supposed to be gone because of Adrinette. Thing is, I can totally see the writers sowing more seeds of emotional cheating because of course (I didn’t watch the NY special either but I heard that happened so).

I’ve always liked Ladynoir third most, second least? Because Ladybug clearly didn’t feel the same way about Chat. Sure further down the line she did but it started with Chat always pushing and pushing and her rejecting and rejecting. He’s tried to kiss her multiple times and even after he’s told no he still doesn’t get it (Prime Queen). Not to mention the disaster that was Glaciator.

I used to be whatever about it but now it’s just kind of sad, they could’ve had romantic tension without it being weird but now all hopes are dashed with now worries of cheating taking place. Yeah, it’s not looking good 😭

Marichat

I used to like this one the least (I never disliked it) because they weren’t mutually into each other. Since recent developments and a more of an appreciation for their dynamic, I’m surprised that it’s not my second least favourite but since they had that whole romantic confession thing I guess I shouldn’t be. Now I have no idea what the fuck is happening with this side but, good for them I guess? I have no idea how the development was handled for them developing feelings either but imagine it was somewhat okay so, big win?

Marichat always had a fun dynamic but I was indifferent to it it because I’m used to seeing “girl rolls eyes at boy being flirty” it’s just so over done in my eyes? And it almost felt like Ladynoir 2.0, because let’s be honest he WAS being flirty in Evillustrator. So yeah I was “just making sure I’m different” about it, but now we got Adrinette being that and Ladynoir being stale, I can’t help but actually appreciate this one, which, unfortunately, makes the standards quite low. Also, I never liked how much the fandom sexualised this side the most so I still have a negative bias toward it but it’s never what it used to be.

Ladrien

Onto my forever favourite side of the square, and it’s purely because of how they for the longest time had mutual feelings for each other. I always thought how cute it was that Ladybug was able to save Adrien and take his breath was taken away. Marinette got to be heroic for the boy she likes, and I can’t help but still get gushy over how Adrien swoons over her in Dark Cupid. Gorizilla is my favourite S2 episode and it’s because of the amazing Ladrien and how hilarious it is. It’s just a very bubbly feelings sort of ship, and it makes sense because 99% of the time I love my ships having mutual feelings from the get go or getting a long very well.

I have no idea currently what the side is like in the show. All I know is that they fell out of love w each other (kind of?), so they don’t have this bubbly feeling toward each other except for Maribug getting feelings for Adrien AGAIN. To say that it’s my favourite is still quite sad because there’s no hope for it.

This isn’t exactly a straight forward ranking because of my lack of knowledge and my own subjective opinion but, here ya go

[saewokhrisz]

my brain is rotting for them.............

i made these a month or two ago so i thought id post them sob

[ssa-montgomery]

A Moment's Silence When My Baby Puts The Mouth On Me

Word Count: 4751

Summary: Hotch works later than intended and finds a way to make it up to Y/N.

Characters: Hotch x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Smut, light Dom/Sub, vaginal sex, oral sex (female receiving), face-sitting, overstimulation, slight sub!Hotch, some dad bod Hotch talk

A/N: So this started out as more of a ship-based idea and then spiralled into a self-indulgent x reader fic but I had so much fun writing it. I had a lot I wanted to include so I tried to work some dad bod Hotch as well as a little more submissive Hotch after him being dominating in my last fic. I really hope you all enjoy this and please feel free to send me some more Hotch requests! (This wasn't a request but I still used one of the prompts from the list.)

Prompt(s): "Just let me finish this paperwork and I swear I'll go down on you until you cum at least three times."

Feedback is what motivates me to work so please let me know what you think! Reblogs are also greatly appreciated.

Taglist is open!

Masterlist

It was almost 9 P.M when you found yourself wandering towards Hotch's office, gently tapping your knuckles against the wooden door and pushing it open as you did. The knock more of a force of habit from work than anything else. At home, Hotch never stopped you from visiting him in his office whenever you wanted but you were always respectful of his space while he worked and tried not to interrupt him too often. Hotch glanced up from his papers at the noise and seemed surprised to see you standing in the doorway.

You'd arrived home from a case that afternoon and once you were back at the apartment Hotch had kissed you and told you he was going to his office to do some work - just adding some finishing touches to the paperwork he'd started on the flight home - promising that he would be done in an hour tops. Now he found himself worrying that something was wrong as you stood silently in front of him. Your face broke out into an amused grin and his brow furrowed in confusion as you walked towards his desk.

"You don't know what time it is do you?" You laughed, leaning in before you tapped your fingers on the top of the clock that sat on his desk to draw his attention to it. You watched as he looked down at the time and the moment of realisation finally set in, a groan escaping his throat.

"I said I'd be done here over an hour ago, I'm so sorry. I didn't even realise it was so late already." Hotch let out a heavy sigh as he threw his pen down on top of the half-finished files scattered across his desk. Once he started writing his "finishing touches" turned into much more work than he'd been expecting.

"Don't worry, I was just coming to check if you were still awake in here. You were being so quiet, I was starting to get concerned." You chuckled moving to sit down on the edge of his desk, your hand reaching out to play with the sleeve of his dress shirt. His suit jacket and tie were thrown carelessly over the back of his chair and he had undone the top buttons of his shirt, leaving his normally formal outfit looking so much more casual than usual. You loved the way the form-fitting shirts hugged his muscular arms perfectly making your imagination wander to the feeling of him wrapping you up in them.

"Oh I'm wide awake, I have all this work to keep me busy." He laughed dryly, gesturing vaguely to the case files. "I promise I'll make it up to you."

"Oh, it better be something good to make up for making me wait a whole extra hour for you." You said, lacing your voice with a teasingly seductive tone. Hotch taking the extra time to work didn't actually bother you. You knew he liked to get the majority of the work done the night he got back from the case just so he could avoid having to deal with it the following day too. It was good for you too as it meant the stress of the case wouldn't hang over him for as long and you could get your boyfriend back.

You watched as something changed in Hotch's expression at the tone of your voice. His head tilted ever so slightly to the side and you could see his eyes darkening as they stared straight into your, making you shift under the heavy gaze.

"Just let me finish this paperwork and I swear I'll go down on you until you cum at least three times." The bluntness of his words caught you off guard, making you stutter for a second before you managed to regain your composure. You found yourself thinking about how good it would feel when he held up his end of the bargain, your imagination making your cheeks turn red.

"Well alright then. You come and find me when you're done here." You grinned gently tapping your finger on the tip of his nose. You already knew that the paperwork in front of Hotch would keep him tied to that desk all night but you also knew that he was a man of his word, all you needed to do was tease him enough to get him to abandon the last of his work.

You stood up from his desk then and turned your back to walk towards the door, feeling his eyes glued to you as you moved. You tried to be as nonchalant about it as you could knowing that doubting his commitment would be enough to make him prove that he always kept his word.

"You don't think I will?" Hotch asked, you could hear the challenge in his voice as he spoke. You turned around to face him again, watching the way he leaned back in his chair with his arms folded over his chest.

"It's just, that's a lot of paperwork. I'm sure you will but probably not tonight." You shrugged trying to hide the smug grin threatening to surface as you watched your plan start to work. Hotch slowly rose from his chair and walked around the desk, moving to stand directly in front of you. You could feel your body reacting to how close he was standing as you moved to lean back against the door frame, your breath caught in your throat.

"Just to prove you wrong, I'm going to make it four." He dropped his head down to whisper right in your ear as he spoke, the rough sound of his voice sending a shiver down your spine. He wrapped one arm around your waist pulling you closer to his body while the other moved to rest next to your head on the door frame, caging you in.

"What about the paperwork?" You asked, looking up at him with that familiar teasing spark before you glanced over his shoulder to his abandoned work on the desk. As soon as he stood up you knew your plan had worked.

"Fuck the paperwork." Hotch's voice was low as he moved his hand from the door frame and finally touched you, cupping your cheek to pull you up into a kiss. His touch was softer than you expected from his words and attitude up until that moment. His thumb gently brushed across your cheek while his lips moved slowly against yours. You could taste the bitter black coffee he'd been drinking all afternoon off his kiss and it made you smile against his lips.

Once you felt Hotch grasping needily at your waist you knew what it meant, knew what he wanted from you. You'd been together for almost two months the first time Hotch took on the submissive role with you in the bedroom. It happened right after the team worked a partially rough case that had Hotch in control of every aspect of it for almost a week. The subject of the case took its toll on him and the pressure was obviously getting to him as well and once you were home he handed every ounce of control over to you.

You would never have suspected that Hotch would want to be dominated in any way but you had never seen him as contented as he was that night. He slept better that night than he had in months and after that, you'd brought it into your relationship more frequently. Sometimes it was only small acts of submission but either way, it gave Hotch a way to escape from his duties at work and forget the pressure that weighed down on him.

Wanting to give him exactly what he needed you made the move to deepen the kiss, nipping lightly at his bottom lip. Your arms found their way around his shoulders, pulling him down closer to your height as he opened his mouth to your demanding tongue. You hummed against his lips when you felt his hands settle on the backs of your thighs, hoisting you up into his arms. You wrapped your legs around his waist letting him easily carry you out of his office.

The hallway was dimly lit, the only source of light coming from the lamp you left on in the living room and Hotch found it hard to concentrate on not tripping over anything in the dark while the feeling of your teeth nipping at the skin just below his jaw clouded his mind. He leaned you back against the wall, taking a moment to catch his breath while he returned the favour of scattering your neck in kisses. The slight stubble on his cheeks from not shaving over the course of the case scratched against your skin as his lips trailed up towards your lips again.

Once you finally found your way to the bedroom he kicked the door open and made his way towards the bed, dropping you down onto the mattress. You couldn't help the laugh that bubbled up in your throat as you bounced slightly when your back hit the mattress. Hotch looked down at you with a grin at your reaction and a look of determination in his eyes. He was going to keep his word to you because if there was one thing he loved more than anything else it was watching you fall apart under his tongue, knowing he was the only one who could make you feel that way.

Hotch kicked off his shoes as you leaned up to capture his lips in another giddy kiss, tugging him forwards to join you on the bed. He took the hint, pulling away from you - noting the whine you let out at the loss of contact - and moving to settle himself back against the pillows. He extended a hand towards you then which you happily accepted. When he urged you towards him you crawled up the bed until you could sprawl your body across his, leaning up to kiss him.

You stayed like that for a moment. Your lips moving slowly against his, lazily making out while his hands trailed across your body. His touch left a burning trail of goosebumps across your skin that had you leaning into his touch. His hands eventually stilled against your hips and lifted you slightly, trying to move you where he wanted.

"Come here." He mumbled against your lips. You sat up then throwing one leg over him so you were straddling his waist, presuming that was what he wanted. His eyes trailed down your down taking in his slight on you sitting on his waist, your hair falling into your face as you leaned forward to kiss across the front of his throat. He moved his hands downwards to help you pull off your pants and underwear in one swift movement but then they returned to their previous space on your hips, urging you forwards again. "That's not what I meant."

You caught onto what he meant then and sat back onto his lap, moving further away from where he wanted you while you grinned down at him. You weren't going to give him what he wanted so easily, even if you knew the pleasure that was waiting for you when you did.

"Ask for it." You said, your voice taking a firmer tone as you took more control over the situation. You saw the way his expression changed as he realised what you were asking him to do. When he didn't respond right away you leaned back again, just out of his reach leaving the only contact between your bodies your knees pressing against the outside of his thighs. "Tell me what you want me to do."

"I want you to sit on my face and let me make you cum." Hotch finally blurted out sitting up to reach out and grasp at your shirt. He wanted to see every part of you. You loved seeing him lose the composure he had early as he let you take over. He was usually so put together that seeing him lose control ignited something inside of you.

"That's a good boy," You practically purred in his ear as you took the hem of your shirt in your hands and pulled it over your head, discarding it somewhere behind you on the floor not caring where it landed. "Using your words to tell me what you want."

At the beginning of your relationship, it had taken a while for Hotch to feel comfortable enough to open up and express what he wanted from you as it wasn't something he was used to. You used to joke that getting him to simply ask for what he wanted was like pulling teeth but over time and with a lot of encouragement he'd become more open with you. At times, it was still hard but he was learning that you would always be open to helping him in any way he needed.

You shifted yourself further up the bed letting Hotch's hands on your waist guide you until you were kneeling right over his face. His eyes had darkened completely now, the mesmerising brown of his irises taken over by the black of pupils. He stared up at you waiting for you to make the first move. Finally, you bent your knees, lowering your hips enough for him to drag his tongue across you. You gasped at the feeling, his tongue moving slowly as he let you change position to try and find the most comfortable way to hold yourself above him.

He could already tell with the angle of your knees that trying to hold that position for long would be hell on your legs in the morning. On top of that, it wasn't enough for him, wasn't entirely what he'd been craving. He wanted to feel the pressure of your full weight resting on top of him, feeling every twitch of the muscles in your legs as your body reacted to his touch. He decided to fix the issue himself wrapping his strong forearms around your thighs to pull you down flush against his face.

"Sit." He mumbled as he turned his head to scatter kisses across the inside of your thighs. Occasionally stopping to lightly suck at the skin, his teeth scraping against you sending a slight shock of pain through your body.

"Are you sure?" You asked nervously. You had never done this with Hotch before and you were afraid you might hurt him once you lost control of your rational thinking. You felt Hotch squeeze your thigh reassuringly and you settled yourself, trusting him to know his limits.

"Promise. Don't worry about me, this is all about you." Hotch husked, nuzzling his face against your thigh. You had no idea what you'd done in your life to deserve this man. "I want you to use me however you want Y/N."

You threaded your hand into his hair at that, tugging lightly at the strands to draw his attention away from your thighs and back to what he'd started. He quickly got the message and lapped his tongue across your clit, setting a fast pace than before. You let out a moan at the mind-numbing feeling of him working you towards orgasm. You grabbed onto the headboard in front of you with the hand that wasn't already tangled in his hair, your knuckles tightening around it as your breath started to speed up. Hotch moved his hands to wrap around your hips, pulling you in closer to him, urging you to roll your hips to match his rhyme.

Your gasps and breathy moans of his name grew louder as he teased his tongue over your entrance, pushing against you but never hard enough to give you what you wanted. When he finally pushed inside you cried out, rolling your hips forward as you did. The movement made Hotch's nose bump against your clit and your head tipped back panting as you repeated the movement again. Hotch grinned against your skin, loving the sounds you were making above him.

If there was one thing you were certain of it was that Aaron Hotchner was damn talented with his mouth. And tongue. And fingers. The man was just damn talented in every way and you were forever grateful for that. At time times you still couldn't believe he was yours.

Hotch found the perfect rhyme, the pressure of his tongue dragging across your walls was enough to drive you insane by itself but paired with the stimulation on your clit you were balancing on the edge already. You could feel the pressure building in your stomach, threatening to break as your thighs tightened around Hotch's face. Clearly, he got the message, he had been quick to pick on the signs that your body was close right from the beginning. Keeping the same pace he started to push his tongue deeper, pressing harder until you were a complete panting mess above him.

All it took was one more stroke over your clit to make you cum, a moan of his name tumbling out of your mouth as you scratched your nails across the headboard. Hotch ran a soothing hand down your arched back as you tried to catch your breath, your chest rising rapidly. He slowed his pace to an almost complete stop as he helped you ride through your orgasm.

Once you finally brought your breathing back to normal, your hips finally stilling as the flutters of aftershock stopped racking through your body Hotch snaked a hand around to the front of your body. The pad of his thumb pressed against your clit and his mouth fell back into his previous rhyme, working you back up all over again.

"Again already? Somebody's hungry tonight." You tried your best to tease, looking down at him with a raised eyebrow but the hoarseness to your voice and the flush that was working its way up your chest gave away just how much you were loving it.

"I believe I promise you four orgasms," Hotch stated in an infuriatingly matter of fact tone. You barely processed what he was saying as you felt the words vibrate against your clit.

You struggled to hold yourself up as your arms started to give out underneath you. Leaning forward you rested your forehead against your arm that was draped across the headboard and dropped your free hand down to run through his hair. You'd learned early on just how much Hotch loved the feeling of having his hair played with. He loved the way your fingers massaged across his scalp relieving the pressure of the day.

With you now leaning over him Hotch had more access to your back and he moved one hand to trace the curve of your spine, right from the base of your neck down to run over your ass. He gently brushed away the hair that stuck to your shoulders with sweat, smoothing his hands across as much of your skin as he could reach wanting to touch every part of you. No matter how much of you he could get his hands on it never felt like enough.

"Just like that Aaron. Please don't stop." You hummed pressing your face further into the crook of your elbow as you tightened your grip on his hair feeling him change the pressure again, his tongue pressing harder against you.

While you rolled your hips to meet the thrusts of his tongue, too far gone to even notice his hand moving again he finally moved to pull open the clasp of your bra. He brushed it as far down your arms as he could until he had to help you sit up, moving your hands away from the headboard to pull the straps off your arms. You closed your eyes basking in the feeling of Hotch groping at your breasts while he continued to go down on you. The sudden shock of pleasure that ran down your spine when he pinched your nipple between his fingers was enough to make you cum for the second time that night.

This time Hotch didn't give you any time to catch your breath between rounds, not waiting for your cries of his name to slow. Instead, he grasped at your waist and swiftly flipped over, moving you onto your back letting your head fall against the pillows without ever taking his mouth off you. The change of position let him tilt your hips upwards, making the thrusts of his tongue reach even deeper.

You whined and bucked your hips off the bed to meet his face, the overstimulation making you so much more sensitive to every one of his touches. Even the most gentle brush of his hand against your thigh. The aftershocks of your previous orgasm had barely worn off when you felt yourself cumming again, probably the quickest you had ever cum. You gasped for air as you struggled to catch your breath, bringing your hand up to brush your hair out of your face.

"One more," Hotch whispered against your thigh as he ran a comforting hand across your stomach, the feeling making the muscles in your stomach jump. "Let me make you feel good one more time. You look so beautiful when you cum just want to see it one more time."

You nodded weakly then, not trusting your own voice as your brain was fogged with the pleasure that was making your body shake underneath Hotch. He knew you couldn't take much more and decided to make this one quick, slipping his fingers inside to crook against your g-spot. He let his tongue slowly drag upwards until he gently licked at your clit before wrapping his lips around it sucking lightly. You were still so on edge from your previous three orgasms that all it took was a couple more thrusts of his fingers to have you crying out his name again. You sprawled against the bedsheets trying to move away from the feeling between your legs as Hotch slowly worked you down.

"Too much." You whimpered wrapping your hand around his wrist to pull him away from you. He slipped his fingers out then and kissed the palm of your hand as he moved to lie next to you.

"Shhh," Hotch whispered pulling you into his chest, letting you moan into his shoulder your voice shaking as you slowly came down from your high. It took a while for your breathing to even out, your heart rate finally starting to slow but once it did he tilted your chin up to make you meet his eyes. Your eyes were heavy, glazed over with satisfaction. "Are you okay?"

"Mmm definitely." You hummed throwing your arms around his neck, pressing your chest tightly against his. You felt better than good, Hotch never failed to make you feel like you had reached a whole new world of good. The feeling he gave your body when you came was beyond words. you leaned in and pressed your lips against his in a gentle kiss. He parted his lips and you groaned when his tongue swiped over yours, tasting yourself on his kiss. Hotch ran his fingers through your hair, brushing his hands over the heated skin of your shoulders.

You dropped your hands to his chest then, letting out a slight laugh as you realised that throughout all of this he managed to keep all of his clothes on while you were left completely naked. Your hands wandered downwards until you could pull his shirt out of his trousers giving you access to the skin underneath, You slipped your hands under his shirt and trailed them across his stomach all the way up to his chest.

Hotch had gone through a few body types since you joined the BAU, even since you'd started dating and while you might have a soft spot for athletic Hotch - admittedly that may have been because of the delicious image of him all hot and sweaty in that tank top and shorts combo - this had to be your favourite. He'd gained some extra weight over the last few months, it wasn't a lot but it was enough for him to fill out perfectly and to give him the best feeling body you had ever experienced. You loved the feeling of his soft muscles under your hands while you caressed across his chest or cuddling into his tummy while you lay across his lap on the couch watching whatever movie he had put on. His weight pinning you down while he was on top of you was intoxicating. You pulled his shirt up and over his head finally gaining full access, you dipped your head down and pressed a kiss to his chest.

"Why don't we deal with this?" You husked in his ear as you dropped your hand to palm across his erection through his pants. He let out a groan from low in his throat at the feeling and dropped his head against your shoulder.

"You don't have to," Hotch said quietly, gently stroking his thumb across the back of your hand despite the way he was pressing himself further into your touch, his body obviously having other ideas. "I know you must be exhausted after all of that."

"Well." You slowly took his zipper between your fingers and started to pull down his fly, letting the sound of the metal scrapping fill the silence for a moment. "Just be gentle with me then."

Hotch moved into action at that, sitting up to kick off his pants and boxers before helping you onto your back leaning down to kiss you. It was a sloppy kiss and you could tell how desperately Hotch needed this. You pulled on his shoulders to encourage him to lay more of his weight on top of you. Your body was strung out after everything that had happened so far and you needed to feel his comforting body against yours.

Hotch rested his hands on your knees and spread your legs apart before settling between them, hitching your legs around his waist. He brought his hands up to lace his fingers through yours, pinning them above your head. Your fingers flexed against his as you let out a whimper, feeling him finally slide into you. Your body adjusted quickly, your muscles already loose from your previous orgasms. Hotch buried his face into your shoulder as he started to move. He kept his thrusts slow but they were deep, strumming every nerve ending you had without overworking your overstimulated and tired body.

"You're doing so well for me, are you going to cum for me?" You encouraged, whispering in his ear and you freed one of your hands from his grasp to caressed across his cheek. He turned his face into your touch simply moaning into your palm in way of a response. You could see him losing himself in the need for release as his hips started to roll against yours and he started to let out more breathy gasps of your name.

"So close for you." He managed, his voice raspy and heavy with lust, the sound heavenly to your ears. He was so close, the muscles in his back tensing under your touch as his body was already worked up from feeling and seeing what he did to you. It only took a few more thrusts of his hips and a few more whispered words of encouragement for him to cum.

He groaned out your name, his body pressing down on you as he came down from his orgasm. His breath was fanning out against your neck as he gathered his strength enough to pull out and collapse down next to you.

He gently kissed your forehead when he heard the whine you let out at the loss of contact, already missing the feeling of his weight pressed against you. You cuddled into his side, letting him wrap you up in his arms. You felt safe like this, Hotch making you show your most vulnerable self and then holding you afterwards, bringing you back down to earth.

"I'm going to go run you a bath." He mumbled against your sweaty skin, stroking his thumb against your arm. You simply nodded in response and curled into yourself when he stood up from the bed, finally closing your eyes and letting your exhaustion take over.

[aneshb25]

i saw some fics on ao3 for daya x abhijeet but they're too much about their friendship without of any kind of homoeroticism, just like you

I was browsing through tv and came across an episode and got so nostalgic about how much I loved CID and also couldn't believe how I didn't realise that THESE BITCHES GAY

I saw your RRR posts (I haven't got to watching it yet but I want to, because of your posts) and I couldnt help myself I just had to know your opinions about daya x abhijeet

I took my sweet time for answering it.. and let me RANT now......

I guess I shipped Daya/Abhijeet even before i knew what 'shipping' was. See, this phrase called 'shipping' came very late to me.

Before that I knew I was reading Kurt/Blaine fanfics, Harry/Draco fics from fanfic.net, all I knew was that yeah... if you type " *character 1* and *character 2* fanfic.net" you get this amazing stories where these characters kiss and create a romance story.

And trust me when I say this, I remember there was this episode in CID where Abhijeet seems to have lost his memories, there was a bandage wrapped around his head... something like that but yeah Daya was this extra emotional towards him and I had gone absolutely feral.

I didn't know that there can be term called 'homoerotic undertones'.. I just knew THAT THESE TWO CHARACTERS CAN KISS!! and that was that but never found any Daya/Abhijeet fics sadly.

It was a slow yet process for to understand what 'shipping', 'ships', 'fandoms' meant. You know growing up in the 2010s when you didn't have regular access to phones, we all know smart phones was a big deal even 6-7 years back from now, growing up in India, we don't get to talk about such things with others, we just find out stuffs and rant about them online.

There was even a time when I had shipped random book characters as well. You see, I am a bengali, and you might know we have a quite famous fictional detective named 'Byomkesh' with his assistant 'Ajit'. umm for a reference Sushant Singh Rajput had done a film 'Detective Byomkesh Bakshi' and long long ago Rajit Kapoor also did a series on Byomkesh on DD national.

Hell I shipped Byomkesh and Ajit so much. I sometimes think on it and I feel so funny!

Even after watching RRR on theatres i had come straight to tumblr if anyone had picked on the blatant 'homoeroticism' and i had to dejectedly return back with just sharing some gifs from the trailer.

Then I found some articles how the west see RRR and its queerness and I knew this FANDOM WILL POP!! I came to see it had already popped off by mid April and still continuing.....

I believe there are many characters from our childhood, early teen years on TV, books, comics where we unconsciously saw THE GAY and shipped it, be it friendship or bromance.... And I bet we all have such 'not so successful shipping' experiences.

I am just happy that today I am grown up enough to see the gay and identify as such and come to social media to find a niche and rant about it, draw fanart or write stories! You realise I was 17 then when i opened tumblr and set up an AO3 account.... before that i was not apparently 'fearless enough' to open an account on AO3 and read the 'only for the users' fics.

It largely changed after Shubh Mangal Zyada Saabhdhan, for me, where i have come to find this large section of Desi audience to be in the 'lgbtq+ shipping community'. I think i phrased this wrong, not just shipping.. a community of desis being the lgbtq+ besties who find common interests between them! Because before this movie, I was mainly involved with non-Indian/ foreign fandoms and pairings.

BUT YEAH GO AND WATCH RRR NOW!!! YOU ARE MISSING BIG! not just the gay but also an amazing visually spectacular, well themed musical, action packed, well acted-directed movie!

(I had too..... just look at them HOW CUTE >///< oh dear anon you awakened this keeda in me)

[rufusrant]

Florence + the Machine - How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful: Album Review

Because I went the whole of Florence's birth month without dropping my irrelevant and unwarranted opinions on her ovure, I'm doing it now. Yay!

As usual, I'm reviewing the deluxe version of the album, along with all separate tracks that were released on other versions, so expect to see the Target-exclusive tracks. Demos however are omitted.

I originally also wanted to make the connections to Dante's Purgatory and the companion film for this album, The Odyssey, but realised halfway that I'd actually mistaken Purgatory for Inferno and had to scrap that because I WILL review music but not a poem I have never read. So instead, I shall only be reviewing this album for its music.

How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful: try saying that 5 times fast

#1: Ship To Wreck

This song has one of the most Florence-esque yet absolutely modern hot-mess origin stories ever: the gist is that Florence held a party, got drunk at the bar where they'd moved the party, covered Daft Punk’s Get Lucky in supreme party girl fashion, went home and then broke everything while water covered her floors. It’s more detailed in her interview with Ellen here.

The second this song started, I got the feeling of being plunged underwater. This is Hurricane Drunk’s older sister after a ferocious bender. It’s so infectious, swirling with self-destruction and stormy guitars and absolute RAGE. The glockenspiel is like air bubbles from where we gasp as we sink. As an opening song, it’s perfect in tone, placement, and as an introduction to the album: we can’t leave the water yet. We can’t stop a shipwreck while it’s happening. 9/10.

#2: What Kind Of Man

I LOVE when Florence goes extra rock. Here is a complete flash-bang where we’re pulled out from the water and immediately tossed into the inferno. The brass orchestration and Florence’s howling, angry vocals take the cake, and those lyrics are the cherries: about a man whose kiss sparks two decades of devotion but just can’t seem to make up his mind (OH.) about his and Florence’s relationship. There is no tender longing present; this is about all the old hurt that comes hurtling to the surface from the partners we’ve stayed just a tad too long with and are, somehow, still staying with. And I fuckin hear you, Florence. 10/10.

#3: How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful

Does Florence refer to the sky or her old love, the ocean? I like to think it’s both: this song depicts that rowdy, journeying feeling of going through a sudden/unexpected transitory period so well. The strings that blaze as she sings the song’s title just rip one through my heart, and the brass instruments return from the previous track, but are utilised for a more subtle, gentler sound. It’s nothing short of grand — but for me, the softer tone of this rather breaks the rock momentum Florence has been building for the last two tracks. 6/10.

#4: Queen Of Peace

Crashing back into fantasy and metaphor after some hard reality bites, we’re pulled back a little into the grandeur of Ceremonials with the grand production and full orchestra to make a modern medieval ballad, but it’s unmistakably a new era of Florence with the way she carries her voice like how a lonely queen looks over a dead field after the battle has ceased. This song is about a triumph, but a deeply bittersweet one at that. And I truly love it for that, because its the truth: what is a triumph without a hard-fought struggle beforehand? 9.5/10.

#5: Various Storms & Saints

I genuinely like the lyrics, but this melody… I always forget about this song as whole. Oops. That much I can say. It stays relatively downtempo and subdued the whole time. Florence’s vocals are the best part and she utilises the powers of her voice only when absolutely necessary, but this song just lacks the “big, almighty sound” that makes up all of the hits, so I’m sorry to say that this is more of a miss for me. 4.5/10.

#6: Delilah

I fucking can’t. This song destroyed me. That is to say: I love this. 

Drawing from the bibical tale of Samson and Delilah, Florence crafts an agonising, intense, total curb-stomper about feeling betrayed and yet being on the verge of breaking free. And it slaps so hard. The percussion combined with Florence’s high-strung, burning vocals make the song such a catchy, swinging, forceful cry. The video for this on The Odyssey is also my favourite of them all, with that heart-rending opening monologue, references to Pre-Raphelite art, and how the visual language of the story is employed. 10/10.

#7: Long & Lost

The most sombre song on this album. It’s also definitely a breather after the freedom scream that Delilah demands. Though it’s fittingly about retreating into some self-doubt, I quite like how this actually feels like a meditation of sorts; a glimpse into Florence’s head and heart as she ponders if going back to where she was is worth it, and laments that maybe it really is already too late. I think it’s rather beautiful, with an even more softened melody to accompany Florence’s dreamily mournful vocals. 7/10.

#8: Caught

Calling this a “livelier” song feels like a bit of a misnomer. Florence’s voice feels lighter and more active in this, but it’s ultimately still a song on the understated side about feeling torn between two extremes: being able to finally move on and holding onto something that hurts. I love how Florence name-drops Persephone, notable for being torn between two very different landscapes, to illustrate her point. The production on this track is one of my favourites — the minimalism applied to this is a sonic treat, and the focus given to Florence’s delivery is top-notch. 8/10.

#9: Third Eye

My personal favourite. This is genuinely one of the most cathartic and life-affirming songs I’ve ever heard. It’s got all sorts of upbeat vibes, spirituality, and an amazing outro that’s practically a mantra. But what I think really makes this song so powerful is how it's styled like a religious hymn— but instead of looking towards God, Florence actually implores us to draw strength and change from within ourselves, to forgive ourselves and love ourselves. God is great, no doubt, but maybe God has been within ourselves all along. 10/10.

#10: St Jude

Not gonna lie, this is where the album starkly loses momentum for me. Again. Why is such a solemn track right after the glorious Third Eye??? 

Of all things, Florence seems to turn back and contemplate her failed relationship once again — but that’s about it for its cons. I think the lyrics for these are great and Florence’s voice does some truly beautiful things, but its odd placement just makes it tank from its full potential. 5/10.

#11: Mother

This took me completely by surprise. I felt annihilated by the end of this. Not only does the album regain its streak with this one track, this song is also truly lyrically stellar and Florence’s voice kicks back into full rock gear straight on. The shifting tides of the instrumentals just score her so perfectly, it feels like we’re being pulled back into the Ceremonial waters for just an utterly rug-pulled-from-under-feet moment. It’s the epitome of that HUGE sound I’ve craved so much— and fittingly, it’s rather a despairing song once you actually read the lyrics. But hey, getting out of such deep water isn’t as smooth a task as it may sound. 10/10.

#12: Hiding

That pre-chorus is so catchy. In fact, this whole song is a proper dance number. So is Delilah but this is more lighthearted, arguably just as powerful AND it manages to retain all the refrains of a poem. It’s a song about being in denial and yet also acknowledging you’re in denial. It's so lively and is probably the song most likely to be played at a club (hell yeah the return of the tambourine), until you hear Florence’s outro at the end. Fuck. 8.5/10.

#13: Make Up Your Mind

What a heart-thrummer. The soft harp makes an unexpected but very welcome return on this absolute neck-breaker of a song, with Florence painting herself as an executioner ready to cut off her relationship— or is she? 

I love how this song incorporates the vulnerability of love and yet the utter ruthlessness that ultimately gets born when love morphs into resentment. When Florence demands that her lover lets her live or lets her love them it almost seems that even that’s lose-lose, with all the trimmings of a medieval scene with that unique, desperate and divine Florence-esqueness. Of course I fucking dig it. 9/10.

#14: Which Witch

Florence embraces the idea of martyrdom— specifically, being martyred by love. It’s such a tight, soaring, jumpy song about getting trialled for witchcraft/love, being miles away but having your love on your mind, getting tired of crawling all the way, and hurting from this so much that burning at the stake is seen as a reprieve. That’s a LOT. But Florence fuckin KILLS it. 

I love this song and think it’s genuinely an amazing song on its own, but am really conflicted about its placement as the album closer — because here Florence ultimately decides to continue her relationship, the very thing that’s been dragging her back into the water throughout the album. I think my thoughts on this change from day to day. When I’m feeling particularly mournful I think it's a perfect closer: it's better to hold onto any form of love than to never love at all. But when I’m not… it’s a gut punch, like it or not. Moving on is an emotional task that we all eventually have to undertake but may not succeed at. However, the duality of this very idea, I think, is what really draws me to this song. It’s okay to not fully move on. But it’s equally just as okay to hold out hope that one day, just maybe, you might. 10/10.

EXCLUSIVE EDITION TRACKS

#15: As Far As I Could Get

This is the PERFECT combination of Florence’s two song styles: epically full of grand, godly metaphors and modern everyday settings out of a contemporary novel. Florence talks about escaping the bustle of Los Angeles and manages to mix reverent nature and a gospel voice with the spectacle of passing by a Disney castle and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride so fuckingly well. I’m incensed that this isn’t on the standard album— perhaps because I find myself relating so much to this right now, but also because it’s a legit banger about actually being determined to escape and move on, being right in the middle of this arduous process, and still feeling that you haven’t gotten far enough yet. 10/10.

#16: Pure Feeling

…I feel so guilty about this. Florence conveys this great, wholesome message of how she loves the world and of how she learnt to during her year off with some lyrics that really lay bare this humbling, warm feeling. But I must admit that the effect’s rather lost on me when paired with the way the melody sounds. Florence also sounds like she’s on the verge of gasping — and not in the good way. 4/10.

#17: Conductor

The lyrics for this are so beautifully poetic. Florence calls back to the standard album’s laments about a lover’s crippling indecision and how she herself turns to songwriting to channel her emotions — much like how conductors conduct both music and electricity. We love a double meaning!

I love the strength of her voice here and the simpler no-frills arrangements of piano and strings that accompany her. I really wish that this could’ve made it onto the standard album too, but in a way I can also see why it didn’t. (Though I don’t really stand for that, it's thematically perfect and has a great Florence vocal, C’MON TARGET WTF) 7.5/10.

#18: Only Love Can Break Your Heart

A Neil Young cover. I’m a fan of the original song as well, and really feel that she did this one so much justice. It exudes a grace and a longing that just extrudes so much more prominently than the original. Florence’s vocals are so clear and carry the tune so delightfully that it loses none of its original melancholy and instead garners so much pure, pure beauty. 7/10.

Overview: What an album. It feels like a lightning strike, and that's already in the simplest of terms. I feel this album as a whole is about learning to let go and change for the better, even if we can’t fully bring ourselves to yet. But my favourite description of this album comes from Florence herself:

“Ceremonials was so fixated on death and water, and the idea of escape or transcendence through death, but the new album became about trying to learn how to live, and how to love in the world rather than trying to escape from it. Which is frightening because I'm not hiding behind anything but it felt like something I had to do."

Which brings us to F+TM's new logo for this era:

A search on Reddit proved that these two triangles are the alchemical symbols for air and water respectively — so this album is literally about the air above water. About rising above the surface. About being free of all that drags you down. 

Ceremonials may be the masterful album that says your grief and pain are valid and it’s okay to feel the way you feel, but How Big How Blue How Beautiful is the imperative follow-up that says: I want to heal. I will heal. 9.5/10.

Stream How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful on Spotify!

[witcherslittledove]

May i suggest Henry sending Joey v explicit geraskier fanart?? (On the behalf of the other boglets who would like to see it, no pressure though my love)

Painted Fantasies

Joey/Henry - Explicit.

CW: RPF, smut, hand jobs, mentions of oral, sex toys and anal sex.

_

Joey was all too aware of the fandom surrounding the first season of The Witcher, and it was bloody terrifying. On one hand, he was grateful for their support, those crazy, wonderful fans that had made the second season possible, but it was just a little bit much for him on some days. So despite his ill-judged drunken tumblr blog ways, Joey had mostly stayed away from the internet as much as he could. He didn’t even promote The Witcher in the same way his castmates did.

But his rather lovely new boyfriend seemed to thrive in the chaos that was the internet.

“Joey?” Henry asked from where he was happily reading on his phone at Joey’s feet.

Not looking up from his guitar, Joey hummed, his tongue slipping between his lips as he tested two variations of a chord, trying to work out which one would sound better for what he wanted. He winced as his fingers slipped and the string twanged nastily. “Bollocks.”

“Did you know that people “ship” our characters?” Henry’s head rolled back as he glanced up at Joey, and, if his guitar hadn’t been in the way, he would have leaned forward to kiss Henry’s forehead.

It was one of the many things in life he was still getting used to. The fame and lack of privacy he could live without, but The Witcher had brought him to Henry, so he would be forever grateful. It was a strange feeling, being allowed to hold the superstar and kiss him whenever he pleased, but Joey was determined to take advantage of that privilege before Henry inevitably realised he wasn’t good enough.

“Ship?” Joey asked, as if he hadn’t spent his childhood in nerdy fan spaces before it had moved online, but it was far less embarrassing to feign ignorance.

“They want Geralt and Jaskier to kiss… amongst other things.”

Setting aside his guitar on the sofa, Joey shuffled forward and cupped Henry’s face. “And what do you think, darling?”

Henry’s face blushed beneath Joey’s fingers, and he gingerly lifted up his phone for Joey to take. As he saw what Henry had been reading, Joey felt his own cheeks heat up and he whispered a low curse as his boyfriend scrambled to join him on the sofa.

“Oh,” was the only word that Joey could manage as he stared at the art Henry had pulled up on his phone.

It was incredibly well done, and there was no doubt that not only was it Geralt and Jaskier, but definitely their Geralt and Jaskier. He could recognise himself in Jaskier’s features, although the artist had been rather generous with Jaskier’s body… and the size of his cock.

“What do you think?” Henry grinned, plucking his phone back from Joey’s hands.

But Joey could still see it, the way Jaskier’s back arched off the mattress, his cock hard and leaking against his chest, the expression on his face… pure ecstasy and Geralt fucked into him, his hole shining with oil.

It should have been weird. He knew he should find it weird, the fact that strangers online were not only imagining him and Henry having sex, but also taking the time to draw it… and draw it very well and very explicitly. But instead, he felt the familiar heat of arousal prick against his skin, a slight fog settling in his mind as his hand pressed against his cock in his trousers.

“Ah, I-” he cursed, and made a grab for Henry’s phone.

They’d never had the opportunity to fuck in costume before they’d wrapped season one, and filming for season two hadn’t started yet. Not telling Henry about his feelings sooner had been one of Joey’s biggest regrets of season one, but by the time he’d gathered up the courage (or more accurately been allowed to have enough alcohol in his system) Jaskier’s scenes were all done and his costume had been swiped out of his reach by the wardrobe department.

But Christ, the fantasies he’d had about Henry taking him apart on set, looking into golden eyes instead of blue, long, silver hair replacing Henry’s brunet curls… they were mind-blowing.

It was as if the artist had reached into his brain and plucked his favourite fantasy and projected it onto the paper, which just wasn’t fair, especially as Henry wouldn’t let him see.

“Henry, give it back!”

“Wait, I have more.”

Fuck.

This wasn’t going to end well for him, and sure enough after a few moments of scrolling, Henry turned his phone back for Joey to have a look. The squeak that escaped him was quite frankly, embarrassing, but he really couldn’t be blamed. The art was just as explicit as the last one, but this time Jaskier had a pair of curly horns poking out from beneath his hair, his skin glowed a burnt orange, and a tail protruded from just above his arse, wrapping around Geralt’s throat as the witcher sucked his cock.

“Fuck,” Joey swore, his knuckles white as he gripped the phone. “Like holy shit, Henry.”

“Yup!” The bastard agreed cheerily as if he wasn’t completely destroying Joey without even touching him.

“An incubus?”

“Looks like it.”

There was a garbled noise as the phone fell into Joey’s lap and he covered his face with his hands. He was unreasonably turned on, his cock already throbbing in his trousers, and he was pretty sure it would only take a few quick strokes before cumming in his boxers like a horny teenager. Thankfully, Henry seemed to take pity on him and Joey was pulled into his boyfriend’s lap, their lips met in a heated kiss.

“Henry,” Joey moaned against his boyfriend’s lips as he rolled his hips forward, enjoying the feel of Henry’s erection pressing up against his arse. “You fucking bastard.”

“I knew you’d like it,” Henry chuckled, his lips brushing along Joey’s jaw to his earlobe, catching it between his teeth. “Wanna see if we can get our costumes back?”

“Fuck, yes.”

Joey half expected Henry to leave him hanging, to call up wardrobe right there and then with Joey rutting against him in his lap, pitiful and wanting. Even the thought of that made him whine, pressing open mouthed kisses against Henry’s neck, but Henry just slipped a hand into Joey’s trousers, wrapping around his cock with one swift and practised move. Pleasure ripped from him and Joey keened, biting down on whatever skin he could reach to muffle his cries and Henry began to stroke his cock, using the leaking pre-cum as lube.

If Joey had already been plugged and ready to go, he would have torn Henry’s clothes off him right there and then, impaling himself on Henry’s rather magnificent cock until they both exhausting and covered in cum and lube, but he knew he would barely make it past two fingers if Henry tried to prep him now. He was too on edge already, the art seared into his mind, and fuck, the fact that Henry had been the one to show him. How many other pieces of art had Henry seen and stored away? Had he only saved the best ones for Joey, picking the ones he thought Joey would like?

“F-fuck!” Joey gasped.

“That’s it, Joey, I’ve got you.” The words burned like fire in his ear as Henry’s other hand slipped up the back of his shirt, holding him close, supporting him as he lost control of everything, knowing only the pleasure, Henry’s fingers on his cock. “Cum for me, sweetheart.”

And he did. With a choked moan, Joey spilled over Henry’s hand, his vision fading to black as the waves of pleasure washed over him. He was only vaguely aware that he was still rutting in Henry’s lap, babbling nonsensical words, even as Henry stood up, holding Joey tightly as he was carried through to the bedroom.

The night had only just begun.

[supremeinlilac]

Into the light (I'll hold you)

Pairing: Coven!Cordelia Goode x Fem!Reader

Prompt: Slow dancing in the greenhouse.

Word Count: 2557

Warnings: Self doubt, angst.

A/n: Canon divergent, H*nk doesn't exist and Delia's acid attack never happened, although she has still had the Sight previously. Was saving this fic but fuck it, I'm posting it now😌

Halloween.

The night of eerie suspense and the lingering sense of being watched. You enjoyed the days festivities when you were younger, skipping excitedly door to door under a white sheet with your friends.

This Halloween would be your second at Miss Robichaux’s, the first you’d all gone out to a party and got a little too drunk, returning to an irritated Ms Goode. It had been the first time you’d kissed her, and she’d rejected you because of the state you’d been in.

Still, it was the night that had started the path of your relationship with the headmistress.

You loved Halloween.

This year, Fiona Goode, reigning Supreme, returned to the academy. You were instantly weary of her, due to the fact Delia never liked to bring her mother up in conversation of her past. When you’d overheard her telling your girlfriend that she was wasted potential in the school, a prickle of icy anger called the hair at the nape of your neck to stand rigid.

You and the rest of the witches had decided to stay in, watch films and play games. It wasn’t often that everyone could get together to celebrate an evening where witches were celebrated, so they wanted to make the most of the friendly atmosphere that surrounded them. It never lasted long in the coven.

Fiona went out to a bar, her witches hat crooked atop her head and you found yourself glaring at her as she left. The woman alit a flame inside you, one that easily spread and engulfed your powers, fire licking hotly at the tips of your fingers and threatened to overpower you.

Cordelia had stayed behind with you, much to her mother protest, to have a quiet night while the rest of the hubbub would be concentrated in the living room. You were both wrong to think that there’d be no disturbances.

The shattering of glass fractured the silence in your shared room with Cordelia. She’d been braiding your hair, an intimacy that the pair of you rarely found time to do together. She hummed the song you were sung as a child, a habit that she’d picked up in your time at the coven, the action now second nature. It no longer only served to soothe you, but now it brought her comfort too.

Her fingers stilled in your hair, head snapping to the door. You heard a couple of loud thuds and shouts, and then her hand was clutching yours protectively.

“Hey Cordelia?” You heard Queenie shout up the stairs, “you best look outside.”

She was off the bed like it had burned her, drawing the curtains back to show the slow advance of the people outside. You heard her shaky inhale, before she fisted her hands in her trousers and turned to you.

“It’s just the locals. Playing tricks on us, you know how Madison likes to irritate them the rest of the year. Lord knows we’re not the best neighbours,” her face looked serious but the waver in her voice betrayed her. She sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than you.

It had been a blur after that, shouting and running, and Cordelia slipped out of your grasp. You’d been fighting, had a kitchen knife pressed into your hand by, Zoe, maybe? No. It had been one of the other girls.

They wouldn’t die, those zombies, if that’s even what they were. You’d slashed at a part of them that they shouldn’t have been able to get back up from. Yet it did, limbs flailing and reaching spindly towards you.

Knocked to the ground, you think you must have passed out. But not before you’d seen Cordelia trying to defend the house, eyes furious and scared and dark.

You remembered the purr of the chainsaw, the splatter of blood. The silence that hung after.

The next day you found Cordelia sat at her usual bench in the greenhouse, frows furrowed in concentration as she mixed ingredients with the gentle crack of test tubes and vials. You could see the anguish behind hooded eyes, it was clear that she’d been restless last night, down here long past when everyone else slept.

You had seen her from your window as you’d been drawing the curtains the night before, standing over the pile of haphazardly thrown bodies of the zombies. You weren’t sure how long she’d spent there, not wanting to disturb her until now.

She’d also been absent at both breakfast and dinner, with the excuse of paperwork, but you could see through the thinly veiled lie. You brought her a sandwich and a yogurt, setting them down on a bench before pulling a chair up beside her to watch her work.

Cordelia could mix potions and restore plants without thinking, her craft a lovingly perfected dance in which he moved around the greenhouse with practised ease, plucking vials off the shelves and balancing glassware in steady hands.

Her hands shook. Slightly, almost unnoticeable was the small tremor but it indicated her unease. There was blood still crusted under her fingernails.

You softly coaxed her to put the glass down with fingers around her wrists, guiding her to look at you before lazily lacing your fingers together. She whispered a greeting with a small smile, almost as if she hadn’t registered your presence until you’d touched her.

“I feel like I failed everyone. My girls.” Her voice cracked languidly, eyes falling to where your hands joined on her lap, her nails scraping at your skin nervously. “How can I be headmistress when I cannot protect you all?”

“It’s not your job to do it all alone.” You reminded her gently, thumb brushing over whitened knuckles, following the dip and contour of her skin. “Cordelia.”

A single droplet of shimmering water does not sink a ship. A single cloud cannot shield the sun. A single parent could spend years doubting their worth, unaware that it takes a village to raise a child.

No single person can bear the weight of the world’s troubles without crumbling.

Not even Cordelia, whom you thought could harness the sun if she willed it, could do everything herself. It simply was an unrealistic expectation that her mother had used to weigh her down with.

“Look at me, baby. You are not alone, okay?”

When her head lifted slowly, the light caught the water in her eyelashes, diamond tears shimmering and rolling down the curve of reddened cheeks. You were quick to coo at her, hand coming to cradle her face so you could lean to kiss them away, salt on your tongue.

She shook her head, refusing to look at you and you felt hopeless, like a bystander on the site of an accident. As much as you tried to couldn’t get close enough to her to help, to comfort her as she needed. Running in a dream, tripping over a mere breath and wading through syrup as you tried to escape.

“I’m a failure.”

You found yourself shaking your head, the phantom of a protest falling from your lips, how could Cordelia think that.

“Everything that Fiona says is true.” She continued, head falling into her arms on the desk. Your hand rested on her back, a gentle reminder of the comfort you could give her if only she asked for it. If only she would accept it when you would give it to her anyway.

“I don’t belong here.” Whispered from under her hair which hid her.

Cordelia didn’t realise her own worth, and you wondered if anyone ever truly does.

Does the night sky know its beauty? Or does it envy the blue of the day? Does it wait for the sun to kiss its head and grant it eternity. The night sky is rich with light, if it would only look deep enough within itself to find it. Burning stars and planets reflecting the sun, a kaleidoscope of colour on an ebony canvas.

Cordelia would often look at pictures of her absent mother when she believed to be alone. She was secretly envious of Fiona’s effortless graceful command and hold that she had over the whole coven. She believed her own magical abilities to be inferior to that of the Supreme’s, but it was an unfair comparison, for a Supreme would always persist.

She thought that it meant hers weren’t strong enough, scared for eventualities like the previous night, that she would fail at the role of protector. But she hadn’t failed, she’d fought just like you and Zoe, and it was just the luck of the draw that Zoe’s fear would trigger her Power Negation.

But Cordelia held such raw natural, burning potential that you’d habitually find yourself staring as she practised spells. Eyes following the deft flow of her fingers as she’d manipulate movement. She’d had the second sight within her, so at least on a subconscious level she must know her power.

“You belong here. And look around you, look at this place. Yourgreenhouse.”

“You made it into what it’s become. It’s you.” You spoke, letting yourself spin to appreciate all the work she’d put into this place, into herself.

Cordelia lifted her head, hair falling from her eyes and crowning her face as she followed your gaze to the hanging planters, the glass vials. To the floor that she’d swept only days ago, leaves starting to litter the stone again.

She watched you run fingertips over the exposed brick on the wall, your attention solely on her work around you. She could see the adoration in the iris’ of your eyes, alight with your honesty. You gaze returning, always, to her as you walked to her.

Tentatively, you reached out for her. Was she yet ready to accept your help, your love as you wanted to give it to her?

Still unsure, Cordelia shied away from your comforting touch, head returning to her hands.

“You don’t have to live behind Fiona’s words anymore.” You whispered into her temple, as if straight into her mind.

Sometimes it is easier to live in the shadows than to confront those who cast them.

She’d spent her whole life cowering in Fiona’s shadow, growth and development stunted from the lack of light. Self-belief fractured into a gaping crack.

She’d been trapped, dark and alone with a mother figure who didn’t love her in a way she understood how to be loved. They both loved each other then, and ove each other now, but sometimes mere love isn’t enough. It isn’t consistent enough to be safe. You can love someone and still hurt them.

You had spent time working on her confidence, creeping back into the light and into herself again. Breaking down the thoughts that had grown to immobile threatening walls that only served to block the light more.

All it had taken was one night of Fiona being back for all that progress to retreat back to where they’d been hidden. Cordelia had urged you then to back away, to leave her and grow by yourself, that she was only holding you back.

But you gritted your teeth and grinned in the face of the devil. You weren’t scared of the dark. And you’d be damned if you were leaving it without your girlfriend. Even if you had to start right back at the beginning, you’d help her to heal.

“You could be the next Supreme.” You urged, pulling her head from where it rested on the table, forcing her to look in your eyes and see your honesty.

“Don’t say things that aren’t true.” She begged, vision hazed by tears.

“But it is true, Delia. You’re so powerful.” You pressed, eyes conveying your severity like your voice couldn’t. Willing her to believe.

You reached to brush the tears that clung to her eyelashes before they fell and stained her face. A lingering kiss to her lips, the feeling of her lower lip wobbling between your own. In that moment, you could feel her fragility.

You didn’t want to push further, knowing that she may never truly believe in her full potential like you did. Instead, you pushed yourself to feet and bounced in front of her. She looked up in confusion, eyes still full with tears that caught the light, and you wanted nothing more than to kiss them away again. They didn’t deserve to dampen her skin.

“Dance with me?” You asked, standing and offering a hand the way you’d so often seen in movies.

A shy smile formed on the headmistress’ lips, cheeks pink and the tips of her ears flushed as she allowed herself to be pulled from her seat. Into the shine of the moonlight, which shone beams of liquid silver through the glass onto the hard stone and the soft of Cordelia.

Your arms secured themselves around her waist while hers stroked the back of your neck. Moments like this made you wonder if perhaps the cliché’s people told you about love had been true. Maybe this could be forever. It always felt like forever when you were in her arms.

You swayed to phantom music, slow and deliberate, soft touches and kisses on bare shoulders. You felt like even a whisper would shatter the perfect peace you’d enveloped you both in, sending ripples of doubt over the sheer water and to Cordelia again.

The moon felt like perfect company in that moment, like a third person, watching and waiting. A witness to the silent change.

Cordelia pressed her forehead to yours, her fingers splayed through the hair at the back of your head, holding you close. You could see the depth of her eyes, searching for the lie in yours that wasn’t there to find. You truly believed that she was the next Supreme, she had to be.

“Say something.” She breathed, hand on your waist dancing under the hem of your top, cold fingers on warm skin.

“Like what?” You asked, pulling back momentarily so you could smile at her. The hand that was behind your head tucked hair behind your ear and brought your hand from her shoulder so she could press lips to your knuckles. The ridge of bone under the soft of her skin and then she was hugging you again.

“Anything, I just want to hear your voice.”

So you told her about yourself. Stories she’d never heard and memories you’d thought you’d forgotten. Whispers of your past shared with your future.

She nuzzled her chin into the crook of your neck and listened, breathing deep the smell of your perfume that clung, lingering to the collar of your clothes.

A laugh.

Rippling up your throat at reminiscing a memory, vibration muffled against her ear at your jaw, and Cordelia swore that she could feelyour emotions. Truly feel you, and she realised that you couldn’t lie to her. Couldn’t will yourself to say something untrue just to still the aching beat of her heart within her chest.

You couldn’t make yourself want to mend her. You didn’t want that. You wanted to help her heal. Heal from her past that held less joy and laughter than yours did.

You wanted to help her create memories of her own, just like this.

Slow dancing in the greenhouse.

Dancing in the dark under the glow of the patient moon.

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