“I’d like to play you another song about suicidal depression. It’s about – if you are a certain type of person – me – . . . uh, you hear about somebody who did something horrible and drastic and you feel bad, but there’s a part of you that goes, ‘what, that’s, now I know, now I recognize my kind, because he did that.’ So this is about a guy who did a terrible thing and he couldn’t live with the memory of it, and so he went and did a worse thing, and it’s called ‘Cry for Judas.’”
- John Darnielle, frontman of the Mountain Goats
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The Fourteen Hidden or "Bug" Audios In Order, With Reasoning
(i think! I'm fairly confident in this! I'm willing to Debate!)
12-14 / Howdy & Barnaby
[we know that Barnaby and Wally go to Howdy's every morning]
8-14 / Eddie & Frank
[the post office is right across from Howdy's]
6-14 / Julie & Frank
[Wally isn't scared of bugs, so he could be recruited to help with Frank's gardening problem]
1-14 / Howdy & Poppy
[Howdy mentions that he has a shipment waiting for his signature]
3-14 / Howdy & Sally
[it's possible that Wally went to Howdy's to get something for the beetles]
13-14 / Howdy & Eddie
[it looks like Wally just bought a box of apples, or something similar. Howdy signs for the shipment]
4-14 / Barnaby & Frank
[behind the pins, it looks like there's an apple or two on the ground. the shape and color is wrong for it to be tomatoes. an offering for the beetles?]
9-14 / Frank & Poppy
[the table is clear of yarn, and Frank references the damage done to his garden]
2-14 / Sally & Poppy
[there are cookies - Poppy mentioned to Frank that she might have a non-seed recipe for his butterflies]
10-14 / Julie & Sally
[Wally could have gone with Sally to help with the script reading]
5-14 / Barnaby & Eddie
[Eddie mentions that it's late in the day, and he already delivered the bowling balls]
7-14 / Eddie & Julie
[Barnaby calls, asking after Wally]
11-14 / Julie & Barnaby
[the lighting through the trees looks like afternoon/evening]
14-14 / Barnaby & Home
[the end deterioration is very final, and Barnaby references things that happened throughout his other audios]
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hello, and welcome to another episode of jules projecting her aromanticism on zayn's music.
this time we're gonna look at some of the lyrics on dreamin.
i been dreamin' feeling this way, i been needing something else, i know what it is when i see it, can't hold on anymore to these feelings
you know? oh, but it gets better.
with no senses, ain't no sentence making sense of us
idk how to explain this, but it makes sense to me. it's like- mmm, i'll let zaynie continue.
did i mention life's intention never steered me the right way
*screaming* you know?! because life really just tells us a romantic relationship is the end goal, and you might end up believing it. and him especially in an industry where nearly EVERYTHING revolves about romantic love? yeah.
now my favorite part...
say i've been falling in love, and in the morning then i feel nothing again
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! this was the line that made me stop in my tracks and really listen to the whole song in that context, and oh boi. then i feel nothing again!!!
please don't let me forget falling in love, it's all good, and in the morning then you call me again. don't call me again. don't call me again. when you're faded, no need to call me again.
this is so... like, listen, maybe you had a good and fun night and it was great, but then in the morning it's like "nope, i really do not vibe with this", because it's that whole fucking confusion of "well, i should be feeling all this big romantic feelings but they're gone already, lol", because you don't know, and nobody in your life knows that platonic relationships can also have sex and be fun without the romantic part. i feel like this song it's like... the before you find out about aromanticism or coming to terms with no desire for a romantic relationship.
this is all rambling, it's my interpretation, and my projection, obviously. i just needed to have my screaming somewhat coherent somewhere.
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songs for turning; a quarry soundtrack
01. ptolemae - ethel cain
(suffer does the wolf,
crawling to thee—)
02. feral love - chelsea wolfe
(run from the light, your
eyes black like an animal—)
03. dangerous - son lux
(how am i supposed to run?
now— am i supposed to run?)
04. oxytocin - billie eilish
(wanna see what you can take—
you should really run away!)
05. i feel like a god - deathbyromy
(nothing you can do about me,
so high that you cannot touch me—)
06. sudden desire - hayley williams
(your fingerprints on my skin,
a painful reminder—)
07. body mind hell - vtss
(ask no questions tell no lies,
those hungry eyes are my demise—)
08. choke - royal & the serpent
(beg you for mercy 'cause my vision is blurry
i'm afraid you could hurt me—)
09. eyes on fire - blue foundation
(i won't soothe your pain,
i won't ease your strain—)
10. eat me alive - swarm, soundr
(and there are no devils in hell,
they live in my mind—)
11. pyre - son lux
(bring all your things,
and we can build a pyre—)
12. i'm not human at all - sleep party people
(we're not human at all—
we have no heart.)
click to listen on spotify.
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paul is a 100% a boob man OMG
and, also, WHYYY do I think he's the type that whines . theres a prema video where they're trying to guess the circuit blindfolded and when they ask paul to confess to kimi that hes been cheating he starts to literally WHINEEEEEEEEE those 30s lives in my mind rent free and im not kidding
!!!!!! im HOLLERING!!!!!!!!!!!! that's one of my fave vids ever omg and paul freaking whining is like music to my ears istg. it's so on point for him too.... i wrote a little about that in the paul nsfw alphabet that i never finished 🫠🫠 but yeah like we've been through, i think he has a slightly submissive streak and he enjoys being teased. and to hear those sweet sounds as rewards when you tease him, or kiss him with a bit of force, or roll your hips on his.... 😶
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I’d live at a festival if I could. I love the vibes. Everyone just instantaneously knows and recognises one another. There’s no hesitation. Everyone’s a stranger, and no one’s a stranger. ‘You’re here for the festival too?’ We all just bounce off each other’s vibes. I will listen to anything. There are no genres. I will dance the night away with strangers. There are circles of people pointing their shoes together and hopping and dancing to Justice. Made friends with Nemo the fish (plastic) at an electronic rave. I will go watch artists I normally wouldn’t listen to. Everyone knows it’s a special occasion, everyone brings a live band. The music automatically sounds bigger, better, more consequential. You make friends in the crowd. You’re able to relate 30 years of loving a band just by screaming the words to one deep cut from that 30 year old album together. I’ve made five different friends from five different countries. My friends left Chappell Roan with five friendship bracelets. I befriended five dads by yelling every single word to F.O.D. at Green Day. I’ve seen people experience extremely private emotions during a song; we’d not even have been in the same venue if not for the festival.
There are so many new numbers in my phone book. Numbers I may never use again. Numbers that might start old conversations next summer as our country thaws and gets ready for music outdoors again. Either way, we’ve spent time together, we’ve discovered new music together. I love music festivals. Long live live music. ❤️
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