#and I’ve definitely gone back on progress lately after speaking to her

[littlecutiexox]

Excited for the day where my trauma won’t hold me back anymore

[jsprnt]

Healing Hearts PT. 12 | Virgil van Dijk

Would a fresh start bring you more than just a new job?

A/N: I’ve been watching the national team games lately and man I miss the World Cup so much :(

WC: 3.199

Summary: Y/N L/N is a very skilled and praised physiotherapist. A certain event pushing her for a fresh start, as a physiotherapist for Liverpool FC. One question always being in the back of her mind: Will she be able to let go of her past and allow herself to experience new things?

I check the time before I get up, walking out of my office to look for Cody. I knew he would be in the gym, that's were he'd been at this past week.

Not being able to train or play in matches definitely made him want to be still be at the training center. Just to not miss out. He had been in a brace since the game against Tottenham, causing him to miss out on yesterdays match against Union St. Gilloise.

Walking into the the gym and spotting him sitting on the exercising equipment, watching the other players exercise as he chats with them.

"Cody!" I call out, realizing it had probably attracted way more attention then if I had just gone up to him. I ignore the looks of some staff members and players, particularly Virgil's as I walk up to Cody.

I had pressed on to hide our relationship. The only thing everyone should know was that we were friendly as physiotherapist and player, nothing more or less. I was wondering if we were even good at it, so far we did not have any hiccups. Or so we thought.

"Hey, are you ready to come with me?" I ask.

"Oh yeah. Of course." He says, getting his crutches together to stand up.

"So, no greeting today Doctor." I hear a Scouser accent say.

Turning my head I make eye contact with a cheeky looking Trent.

"Hello Trent." I say, a smile on my lips.

My eyes dart at Virgil behind him who's talking to another staff member. Though, it seems like he can feel me staring at the side of his face as his eyes move to make eye contact with mine.

And of course he fucking winks

No, not even a fast wink and look away- no he had to keep staring after

I catch myself quickly trying to play it off swiftly and return my gaze to Trent.

This man was testing me.

"You've been very busy lately? Not having lunch with us either." He says pointing at me.

"Well my schedule has been packed you know that. I got to make sure you and your fellow national team players are in top shape."

He chuckles his hand coming up to my shoulder, slightly squeezing it. "Appreciate it Doc."

I nod at him, warm smile forming at my lips. I loved it when my work was respected or praised. It was definitely a huge motivation to keep helping and supporting my patients.

"Thank you. Speaking of, I have to see you in a about thirty minutes. Southgate's people have been emailing nonstop for your progress report. I've got to update it before sending it tonight."

His grin turns wider, his pearly teeth showing as the corners of his mouth crinkle.

"I'll leave before I boost your ego even more! See you in a bit." I say, laughing at his change of expression.

I look back at Cody who had already found another chatting partner and tap his shoulder to signal we had to go.

"You need any support?" I ask watching him walk with the crutches.

"Oh no it's fine." He say as we walk towards my office.

"Alright so-" I begin, reading my notes again to a worried looking Cody.

"I did discuss your injury earlier with the other physio's. I was advised to check your injury again today. Just to confirm our final conclusion. Initially, we estimated the healing time would be around seven weeks. With the progress you have already made with the brace you have on- we think you'll be back on the pitch in about four weeks. We're guessing it won't take anymore time since you definitely have a record of healing pretty fast."

"So no EURO qualifications?" He say a disappointed look on his face.

"Yeah- I'm sorry Cody. You know you have both internal and external help ready for you. Just mention it if you think you need extra support to one of us and it will be handled. Besides, I think our country definitely has a huge chance of making it to the EURO's. Just focus on healing so you can be in Germany next year. I promise you you'll be back better than ever." I say, looking at him with sympathy.

"Thank you. I know I can definitely trust the team." He smiles, though he still has disappointment written all over his face.

"Speaking of the EURO's- are you taking the optional leave during it? It has probably been a while since you've seen your family and friends." He asks changing the focus of the conversation from him to me.

I hadn't even thought of home in a while. After the infuriating phone call with Theo I had vowed to myself I'd stop letting it bother me as much. It wasn't healthy for me mentally. So I let everything be handled by my new attorney I had recently become acquainted with and of course the authorities.

I had moved back home, installed some fancy security system that costs me thousands and changed my key-code and lock. I was so done with being stomped on like a bug by a ratty looking man - I had to take control of my life somehow.

Me living alone again did take some convincing on Virgil's side. He was understandably very concerned for me- but obviously I was grown enough to handle that part on my own and he understood. He helped me move back in and everything was going very smooth so far. Of course Sophie made sure to check on me many times by knocking on my door. We had girls nights almost every other day at this point.

"I don't know- haven't thought of it yet." I answer, it did sound nice to go home to see my friends and parents. None of them knew what had happened. FaceTiming with the girls when I was living with Virgil was difficult. Especially, when his house looked so different compared to mine. To try to hide that I was living somewhere else was an actual pain in the ass. I was glad I did not have to do that anymore.

"It does sound nice but I'll have to think about it since we could have some more injuries coming up. Fingers crossed everyone will stay healthy though."

Cody ends up leaving shortly after, and I follow him out to find Trent. Hoping he's still in the gym. Thankfully, he is, and we walk into my office together and I go over the most important things that needed to be updated on his progress report.

It doesn't take much time and my appointment with Trent is done quicker than I had scheduled. Leaving me alone in my office, absentmindedly doodling in the corner of my planner, oblivious to the world outside of my office doors until the door handle is moving. The sound of the door being opened and locked after removing my attention from the flower I had drawn.

"Virgil? Did something happen?" I ask, worried about something going wrong at the gym.

He smiles walking up behind my desk and turning my office chair towards him so I face him.

"Just wanted to see my doctor." He says, and I try to not look flustered. He effect his words had on me needed to be studied by a renowned university.

I stand up, looking up at his tall frame, it slightly sweaty. The smell mixed with his musky cologne.

His hands travel to the small of my back pulling me closer.

"Virgil!" I hush, my eyes darting around even though I didn't have any glass panels or windows facing the hallway.

"What I can't see my beautiful girlfriend now?"

He smirks, his eyes roaming around my face.

Oh he was definitely enjoying this

My hands travel down to remove his hands from my back, stepping aside for a moment.

"What if there is like paparazzi hiding into those trees or houses? Can't they see us?" I whisper, my expression bewildered. My eyes travel to the window that faces the training pitch, darting around to look at the scenery behind the large pitch.

"Don't be absurd how would that be possible. No one will see us y/n." He says, his hands traveling to my jaw, gently making me face him.

"You're fine. We'll be fine. Just tell me- did you miss me?" He asks another cheeky smile on his face. I roll my eyes, though a smile pulls at the corners of my lips.

"Nope, not at all. You weren't even gone. Besides, you smell like sweat. Move!" I tease, stepping away again. He reaches out again and I step away again, a laugh leaving my lips at the desperate look in his eyes.

"Now you're being childish."

"I'm not. Go back to training. I have another appointment in a bit." He steps towards me again, this time managing to catch me in another hug.

I open my mouth to protest again, but we're interrupted as someone knocks on my door. My blood going cold for a moment as I pull away from Virgil. I look at him mortified, my heart thumping in my chest.

How would it look? If the physiotherapist and a player of the team were in her office. With the door locked?

Virgil notices the panic in my face, his face coming closer to my ear. His hand coming to run up and down my upper arm.

"Calm down. Go open the door. I'll sit on the table to pretend you just treated me and I wanted privacy."

"Okay." I whisper back, trying to release the tension in my body.

"Muscle tenseness." He adds.

I walk quickly, glancing back at Virgil before opening the door.

"Why is your door locked. Got someone in here?" The German accent booms, and I don't know if I should be relieved or embarrassed.

"Oh Jürgen?"

The name falls off my lips awkwardly, he'd insisted we'd be on first name bases. It would break down some hierarchy and our teamwork would be better he had said.

I step aside to let him in.

"Oh yeah- treated Virgil for something- tense muscle." I lie, forcing a smile on my face.

He raises an eyebrow as he catches Virgil on the treatment table, his shorts slightly hiked up to pretend I had just finished treating him.

"Boss!"

He exclaims getting up and greeting Klopp with a hug. Leaving me practically third wheeling there for a moment.

"I am sorry y/n thought you were free but you had a patient here." He says and I can't help but notice he's definitely teasing us.

"It's okay- what was it that you wanted to see me for?" I ask, trying to dismiss the topic. Discreetly trying to make eyes at Virgil for him to leave. But he shakes his head, obviously this wasn't torturous enough for him.

"It was about you staying here or taking a leave during national break. Should he leave or is he allowed to hear about it?" He points a thumb at Virgil both of them obviously now trying to crack jokes about the entire situation.

I chuckle, sure I shouldn't be awkward around Klopp. He'd known about almost everything so far, our relationship, the break in. Most embarrassingly a bit about my relationship with my ex. He was required to know at least some of it, so there was no reason to feel weird around him.

"Shouldn't he be in the gym right now?" I ask raising a cocky brow at Virgil.

"You heard your missus get out of here already!" He jokes, using the British slang, lightly punching Virgil's shoulder. His perfect pearly white teeth showing.

"I need you to leave."

"Excuse me?" I ask, the tone of my voice high as his words make my heart skip a beat.

"You need to leave for a bit during national break. I do not want you working then."

I quietly exhale at the rest of his sentence. He almost had me thinking I was getting fired.

"Why?" I ask, fidgeting with the pen in my hand.

"You've been through a lot and I think it's best that you go home for a bit. See your family and your friends."

I raise my brow at his words, my face morphing into a confused expression.

"Oh I'll be fine here there is no reason-"

"Listen and trust me y/n you've been through something that requires some more rest and healing. It's a little longer than a week and I need you to get out of here for a bit."

I stare up at him with wide eyes- a manager also taking care of the staff. That was new.

"I'll think about it Jürgen. Thank you."

"Fill in the leave application and I'll make sure it gets confirmed immediately."

I lean back in my chair after finally emailing some progress reports to my fellow physiotherapists of the national teams.

I let Klopp's words sink in, it was occupying my mind when I wasn't treating or assessing the players. Why was everyone so curious and insisting I'd take a leave?

My thoughts are cut short as I hear a notification pop up on my phone. My hands going to reach over as I'm still leaning in my chair.

The message being from Virgil. He's says training ended and to come over to his when I clock out. I shoot a quick message back agreeing before sitting up and working on the last progress report I had to send before getting out of the office.

"Should I come with you? Back home?" I say, fidgeting with the blanket on my lap as I look at Virgil. He turns his head from the Netflix show he was occupied with, a slight surprise on his face.

"You want to?"

"Yeah- thought it would be good for me and everything-"

He suddenly throws his arms around me, his face coming closer to mine to plant kisses on my face and lips.

"Of course- you’ll come to my matches and everything- let me check the flights. There should be a lot of availability."

I watch the plane land through the window. I had taken so many flights in my life due my work, that I could practically fall asleep through the turbulence. Though, first class made it ten times more comfortable.

I rub my tired eyes, the last few days had been hectic with me not knowing what to pack and in true me fashion I over packed. Virgil had already left a couple days earlier. The training camp in Zeist requiring him to be there earlier.

I had told everyone back home I was returning and everyone was very surprised to hear I was visiting so early. My dad was picking me up from the airport which did make a bit nervous. I hadn't seen him in a while. Which made me curious as to how he would react.

Thankfully, my luggage comes quickly and I immediately make my way outside of the airport. Dragging my heavy baggage behind me. Of course in typical Dutch fall fashion the weather was shitty as ever. The rain dripping on my face and body, making me shiver.

Spotting my dad in his car I nervously approach it. Taking deep breaths to try to calm my nerves.

He steps out after parking, his door opening immediately as he walks towards me.

"Hi dad."

I'm caught of off guard as he wraps his arms around me in a hug. My dad giving me this much affection? That was a new one.

"Let me have a look at you." He mumbles, pulling away and planting his hands on my shoulders.

"You've gotten skinny. Is the food there not good enough for my daughter?"

I chuckle, dismissing his concerned expression.

"I'm fine, but can we go home? It's cold out here."

"Here we thought y/n was going to England for a new job, but she also snatched a man as well?" Monet exclaims, taking a sip of her drink.

I had told them of my relationship with Virgil. From beginning to end, leaving some- crazy details out, but they were happy for me.

We all came together to Monet's home for a nice movie night. We had a lot of catching up to do. The movie had long finished, leaving us lounging around her huge sofa with drinks and snacks on the table.

"Oh stop you know I didn't plan shit." I exclaim throwing her a piece of popcorn which she avoids quickly with the duck of her head. A laugh leaving her nicely painted lips.

"Hey, no reason to be embarrassed. You're a WAG now-" Juliette teases and I resist the urge to throw another piece popcorn her way this time.

"Stop making it sound so weird- it just happened."

I complain taking another sip of my drink. My eyes dancing over the marble tiles of the home. Monet had opened her own clinic a couple years after graduating, and looking at how beautiful her home was maybe I should've taken that route too.

"Right- let's talk about something else, or we're never passing the Bechdel test." Priya chimes in.

Oh yeah, that would be much appreciated.

The night passes with many laughs and juicy gossip. Half of the friend group being flat out drunk when it's time to go home. Clumsily calling Uber's and getting home late. Making them remember their old university memories of partying it up on weekends.

y/n enters her childhood bedroom, stumbling across across the pink carpet before drunkenly throwing herself on her twin bed. She groans softly, the mattress being harder than she had recalled.

Her sleepy and drunken daze is interrupted by her phone ringing in her hand bag. She grumbles before sitting up, moving her hands to look for the bag. Only to find it on the floor, and sleepily pulling out her phone.

"Hello?" She mumbles holding the cool phone against her warm cheeks and throwing herself on to the bed again, her cheek squashed against her fluffy pillow.

"y/n?" The deep voice calls out, and she gasps softy at the recognition of the comforting voice.

"Virgil? Why haven't you called me all day? I've missed you." She giggles, her cheeks hot from the alcohol.

"I've been busy at the training center. You okay? You sound different." He asks, wondering why his girlfriend sounds so giggly and is slurring her words.

"Drinks with the girls. Half of us got drunk. Liz almost tripped when entering the cab." She laughs, trying to whisper so her parents don't wake up.

"Oh yeah?" He says, amused by her drunken story and speech.

"It was funny." She whispers, her drunken mind repeating the scenario, making her burst out in laughter again.

"Okay, but when can I see you? We're in the same country but I still miss you." She unconsciously pouts.

"We'll be in Amsterdam tomorrow, two days before the match. Come over to my place yeah? I'll see you tomorrow night. Go to sleep now sweetheart. You must be tired."

[raayllum]

Building on something that I kinda articulated / realized while speaking aloud on my podcast the other day, I’ve already talked a lot about how S4 in particular, from a structural stand point, is very to S1, so now I want to add to that and talk about how S2 and S4 are emotionally similar to one another in terms of how they treat character progression / emotional beats and arcs, featuring the main five (Claudia, Rayla, Callum, Ezran, and Soren + Viren). 

Claudia (+ Viren)

Claudia delves definitively deeper on a darker path than before, submerged more than ever in the use of dark magic. She is unquestioningly loyal to her father (whereas in S1 and S3 she had more small moments of doubt) and her relationship with features its focus and the final severing of the tie respectively. However, both early S2 and late S4 are sure to keep a line of hope alive regarding Claudia by having her do genuinely good things even if they don’t precisely serve (or actively go against) her present goals, re: parents and gift giving. 

Viren has initial doubts regarding involvement with Aaravos (2x04, 4x02), before reaffirming and completely turning himself over to Aaravos in the season finale in terms of trust / involvement, actively choosing to sow more chaos (rather than trying politically or passively with Claudia) of his own dark magic use / accord. We also likely see the most emotional repression from Viren in S2 as he still has lingering guilt/grief over Harrow (looking at the family portrait in 2x01, retelling their story) as well as Viren actively shutting down his emotions in S4: “Get a grip” / “What good would worrying do?”

Soren

Whereas in S2 Soren is constantly going back and forth on who he wants to be - a protector or persecutor of the boys, trying to to protect his sister but ends up being protected by her, picking a fight he can’t win with a dragon - Soren in S4 is much more measured. He’s firmly integrated into Ezran’s council / found family and even bonds with Zubeia, something unthinkable to the person he was two seasons prior. Yet the ghost of magic and the undesired affect its had on the trajectory of his life, including his father, continues to haunt him. 

Rayllum (+ Rayla)

Like in S2, Rayla’s arc in S4 is largely (but not unilaterally) tied to her relationship and dynamic with Callum, both romantic and not. In season two, she’s trying at first to earn Callum’s trust and then to take care of him as he navigates some of the recent upheavals and losses in his life. In season four, she’s trying to regain his trust and figure out how she fits into his life now / how they can come back from her leaving. 

This plot line includes Callum requesting space, late night talks (2x07, 4x07), renewed understanding, more parallel looks (Callum looking away sadly after she leaves in 2x07 and likewise looking away sadly in 4x09 once she leaves) if more issues and discussions to come. The plot lines ultimately culminate in a final focused on a hug in the season finale.

Then, of course, 4x05 highlights the biggest change in Rayla we’ve seen thus far when she walks away from the drake being tormented in the forest, compared to her most notable season two scene/decision in a lot of ways to save the crashed dragon by any means necessary. Rayla hasn’t changed that much in her decision (i.e. it’s not that she doesn’t want to risk herself, but that she doesn’t want to risk the mission they’re currently on - or so she says) but it’s a stark and jarring contrast that effectively sets up something is deeply wrong and something deeply traumatic happened to her while she was gone, even if we can only currently guess. 

But like S3 Sun, I expect S5 Ocean to shine all the light on her and develop her initial Arc 2 arc to its fullest potential. 

Callum

Callum perhaps has the strongest parallel between season two and season four. I’ve touched on the similarities before in a post examining how S4 has started to finally properly foil Callum and Aaravos as characters, but it’s worth reiterating here. 2x01 and 4x01 both end with Callum reeling from a loss that he’s trying not to let get to him too much (magic and Rayla respectively) as well as how it informs his identity: “I will learn magic, it’s who I am” / “The high mage’s office - uh, my office.” 2x02 and 4x02 deal with frustration and ultimately warning signs of who to trust, as we know Claudia and Soren are up to no good just like we know deciphering the mirror will be no good, but where Claudia beats Rayla to the punch in 2x02, Rayla shows up just in time. 

2x03 and 4x03 deal with the immediate fallout of this revelation / appearance even if 2x03 provides closure, precisely because Callum is willing to talk, that 4x03 doesn’t offer either of them. Then 2x04 and 4x04 focus on travel time through a non walking transport (a ship, dragon back) that takes some departure time and Callum’s pursuit of magic having deadly consequences. Callum retreats from the storm dejected and defeated, citing, “I could have gotten Zym killed. I put us both in danger” which Aaravos taking over Callum’s body reinforces in a bigger way as we see: “I’m afraid he’ll use me to do terrible things. Or hurt people I care about” 

Then, as the post I linked above mentions, you have the parallels in which a mage chooses to shatter something important and the Callum starts spiralling regarding magic and identity afterwards. For Callum, this is the primal stone in order to hatch Zym in 1x09; for S4, this is when Aaravos shatters his mirror. This leads to Callum having a crisis of faith and being deeply concerned over his ability to contribute; first at all, and then being terrified he’ll contribute something awful, as well as being the only two seasons where Callum’s destiny and what that means is something discussed outright. 

The fact that S4 juxtaposes both Callum and Rayla’s most defining season two moments against each other, this time with cruel change and self doubt, is another very nice way they continue to have one of the primary foil relationships in the show, and indeed one of the many structural hints that the resolutions of these issues will be even more tied together than they already were in terms of the post-TTM fallout alone, which is saying something. 

Ezran

In early S2 and S4, Ezran is perhaps more tense than he’s letting on, but ultimately still very hopeful and optimistic. He isn’t cognizant of everything happening around him in spite of the signs (Callum’s grief abut Harrow, his people’s upset about Zubeia’s visit). Likewise, we see Ezran’s choice to go home to be king at the end of the season juxtaposed with the ability to leave (at the behest / support of his council) in season four, even if Ezran is even more aware of what his position as king means.

Additionally, we see that Ezran’s main fear is the same as it was when he first made the decision: being king is something even two years in, while he’s undeniably grown more comfortable with it, he still feels is a constant (understandable) curveball. 

S2 and S4 are also undoubtedly the seasons that develop Ezran and Zym’s bond the most. Last but not least is Ezran reckoning with things he feels he should have known, ways that he should be better than he is, and the grief and guilt compounding those things. 

Conclusion

Season four is an interesting mix, I think, thus, of season one and season two into its own unique blend. At the same time it’s playing catch up and getting us used to the context of everything, it’s also not dropping us into a world or with characters we’re entirely familiar with like season one. Instead, we end up with characters largely caught in the middle, the way they were in season two; changed since we last saw them in in S3 for S4, or even S1 for S2, with arcs being set up to continue further and evolve in this new stage of the story. Not much is resolved (i.e. think of Soren’s S2 arc, Ez, or Rayla’s) with season four contrarily stretching out Callum’s arc alongside his peers to be developed further, but still with their own changes, victories, and losses along the way. 

However, in the areas that season one and two offered closure, season four largely doesn’t, reflecting the core theme of the season and of the Mystery of Aaravos going forward: the story isn’t that ‘simple’ anymore. Things don’t resolve as neatly. And it’s only going to get more complicated, painful, and even more complex moving forward. 

[messers-moony]

Comics 3 | A.G

Paring: Aidan Gallagher X Fem!Reader

Summary: Aidan meets an unusually pretty girl at a library while trying to find a textbook for school.

Thirty years of age, both adults still lived in the heart of New York City with bustling careers. Aidan’s singing and acting career took off after releasing his EP at twenty-five, along with his acting in The Umbrella Academy. Not to mention his phenomenal acting in the Netflix series based on Y/n’s comics.

Y/n’s comic book writing and illustrating only got busier as the years went by. So much so Aidan would have to make sure she was eating correctly as she soon became a workaholic. While he loved her passion for comics, he also loved her well-being and wanted her healthy.

Soon enough, she found her healthy balance between work and reality. But lately, she found herself delving back into old habits. She cooped herself in her office, not ever wanting to leave. Aidan tried convincing her to leave, but every time, she’d say the same thing.

“ If I leave, I’ll lose inspiration, and I have perfect ideas at the moment! “

What was even worse was she was most productive at night. So now, Aidan slept alone instead of with the girl he yearned for. Oftentimes he found himself hugging her pillow with his nose as deep as it could go without suffocating himself.

This was a very unhealthy addiction, and again, Aidan loved her enthusiasm for her work, but this was becoming too much. It was about 4 am when Aidan got restless and left the bedroom.

Hesitantly he knocked on her office door to no response. Sighing, he opened the door. There he found Y/n laid with her head on top of the desktop. She was sound asleep, looking rather uncomfortable.

Carefully he picked her up and brought her to bed. She would probably scold him in the morning for bringing her to bed instead of waking her to continue to work, but he didn’t care. She fell into bed effortlessly and instantly nuzzled into his arms, staying asleep.

He gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead before falling asleep himself. Then in the morning, clattering in the kitchen could be heard. Groaning, Aidan left the bed to see Y/n in the kitchen making coffee while reading something on her phone.

“ Morning. “ Was spoke tiredly from Aidan’s mouth, causing her to look up, “ Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. “ Y/n apologized as she set her phone down.

Aidan took a seat at one of the barstools next to the ledge, “ You didn’t. I was bound to wake up eventually. I have a photoshoot later and some scenes to do. “ He replied as he rubbed his face.

“ Are you okay? “ Y/n queried, “ You’re not overworking yourself, are you? “

Aidan deadpanned, “ You’re not one to talk. “ He snapped, and Y/n looked taken aback, “ I found you asleep at your desk last night with colored pencils in your hand. “

“ I'm sorry. I just, I just really need this done. I have a deadline, and it’s stressing me out beyond belief. “ She again apologized, making Aidan sigh, “ I know, love, I know. But you can’t keep yourself in your office all day. You worry me when you’re like this, not eating, not drinking, not doing anything aside from work. “ Aidan explained.

“ I know you’re very passionate about your work, and I love that about you. You put everything you can into your comics, and that’s what makes them so good, but you need to find your balance again. You’re stressing yourself out over nothing. You’ll complete this comic in time. I know you will. “ He reassured, “ I do not deny it isn’t stressful because I know it is. But you can’t be this hard on yourself. “

Y/n sighed, “ Thank you. I’ll try to find my balance again. It’s just been so much. “ She admitted, and Aidan gave her a tiny smile, “ I know. We’ve been together for almost five years, dated for two, and married for nearly three. I know when something becomes too much. “ The brunette male retorted with a chuckle.

“ Damn, it’s almost been three years. It feels like it was yesterday. “ Y/n reminisced, “ You were such a dork back then. “

Aidan scoffed, “ And you weren’t? If I remember correctly, you wore sneakers instead of heels to our wedding. “

“ I can’t walk in heels! That’s not being a dork; that’s being intelligent. “ Y/n faked offense, and Aidan raised an eyebrow, “ And when we got back to the hotel, what did we do? “

“ Played Mario kart. “ Y/n muttered, “ Mm? I couldn’t hear you. “ Aidan teased.

She crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes playfully at her husband, “ We played Mario kart. “

“ And that is the dorky side of you, my dear. “ Aidan smirked as he got up from his chair and towards the coffee maker, “ But don’t be mistaken, I love you even more so because you’re like that. “

“ We’re not like normal married couples, are we? “ Y/n questioned as Aidan handed her a coffee, “ Definitely not. “

Life had resumed after that playful banter between both lovers. Aidan had gone on to do his photoshoot and scenes for the day while Y/n worked on her comic book.

Something had always been curious to Aidan though, more specifically, there was a question lingering in his head constantly. Where was Y/n’s family? And why didn’t she ever speak of them?

Aidan was always reasonably proud of his family, but Y/n hadn’t ever mentioned that she had a family. He’d be lying if it didn’t worry him. He didn’t want to imagine her having no family at all. While Aidan’s parents were terrific in-laws, he needed to know she had family as well.

There weren’t even pictures anywhere of them, not a sign. Her phone didn’t hold any photos of mysterious people, nor did any of the frames in the apartment they lived. The questions became more persistent as time went on.

Eventually, after months of pondering, he decided to ask. They were both watching a television show in the living room as she laid in his lap. His hand had absentmindedly began playing with her hair as the other rested upon her chest.

“ Love? “ Aidan spoke, grabbing her attention, “ Yes? “

He thought long and hard before being bluntly curious, “ Where’s your family? “ The question had now blatantly been spilled from his mouth as she froze, “ I, uh, why do you ask? “ Y/n stammered.

“ You’ve never spoken about them. I’ve never even seen proof they existed. It’s been piquing my curiosity forever, and it pains me to think you grew up with no family. “ Aidan confessed as her face softened at his concern, “ I did grow up with family. We should probably just leave it at that. “ She responded, but Aidan wasn't happy with her answer.

“ Please, what happened to them that you won’t even tell me about them? “ He persisted, “ Aidan, it’s not essential, I promise. “ Y/n replied, trying to keep her frustration to a minimum.

Aidan still wasn’t quite cheerful at her sudden annoyance, “ What are their names? Did you have any siblings? Any cousins? Any aunts or uncles? “ The male continued asking questioned until Y/n lost her temper, “ Aidan! Please! I don’t want to speak about them. They made it known long ago they wanted nothing to do with me, okay? “ Y/n snapped as she sat up and faced him.

“ But why? “ He questioned softly as he cupped her cheek, “ Because! They didn’t like the person I became. They thought it was stupid. I wanted to even think about majoring in Art. I was exiled from my own family because Art was my choice of career. “ Y/n began explaining.

She sighed, “ It didn’t help as I progressed through my career either. They caught wind of us dating and weren’t happy. Said you were an idiot, a fool, and- and just a dumbass using me for sex. I- I couldn’t take it anymore! I was sick and tired of being ridiculed my entire life. So I cut them out of my life like I should’ve many, many years ago. “

“ I’m so sorry. “ Aidan whispered, “ I didn’t mean to pry.

“ It’s okay. You didn’t know, but now you do. “ Y/n replied as she hastily wiped her cheeks.

“ Why don’t we play some Mario kart? “

[buckys-black-dress]

✄ chapter two: keep it cool like iced tea

a/n: here's chapter two! obvi this is just building the plot and storyline, but we're seeing the beginnings of the magic! anyways, let me shut up so u can read. ok bye!

wc: 2k

[fratboy!bucky barnes x fem!reader]

series masterlist

-

To say you sucked at pong was a vast understatement.

And although you really didn't want to make a fool of yourself in front of this very nice, very tall, very attractive guy, you can't help but feel like an idiot when you sink your first shot into a cup halfway through the game.

You're definitely on your way drunk with the amount of shots Natasha and Sam have scored on you, plus all the ones you've missed.

When Natasha told you to let loose tonight, you're not so sure this is what she meant, though. You see her laughing and giving you eyes from across the table, while your face is bright red. You brush off her looks with a roll of your eyes, darting them back to Bucky.

Bucky.

Bucky with the incredibly nice hands and arms, who seems to be making the shots for the both of you. Bucky who's been occasionally slinging an arm over your shoulders, paying close attention to you. Bucky who's been asking you questions about yourself, that you've returned back, and received witty responses to.

"So, where 're ya from, Y/N?" He asks in a slurred voice, but you can tell he's not exactly drunk yet.

"I'm from New York. You?" You ask, throwing back another drink from a shot that Nat made into your cup.

"No shit! I'm from Brooklyn!" He smiles, a big, bright smile that tugs at your heartstrings for some reason.

"I'm Manhattan born and raised, mister." You return his blinding smile.

"Small world, huh?" He laughs, once again wrapping his arm around you. "Can't believe we've never ran into each other before."

"Well, New York City's quite large, Bucky." You giggle, and he laughs back. As you feel your face warm up, he looks down at you with something akin to adoration in his eyes. Bucky towers over you, deciding that the pong game was over between the four of you.

He walks back to the kitchen, assuming that you'd follow him.

But he turns around to ask you in you'd like something to drink, and you're not there.

You're still chatting with Natasha and Sam, and it takes him a second to realized you wouldn't just follow after him. You didn't really give him the impression of being that type of girl.

Which is what intrigued him more about you. You weren't worshipping the ground he walked on, you didn't initiate conversation too much, and you didn't drool over him like every other girl he's met.

He suddenly feels a surge of awkwardness. He sees you talking animatedly with Sam and Natasha, and now Steve has joined in the conversation. You were talking completely comfortably with them, much more comfortably than you were with him.

It makes him wonder what he'll have to do to get you to get like that with him.

What he'll have to do to make you trust him.

"Hey, Y/N, I was gonna head to the kitchen and grab a drink. Wanna join?" He questions, seeing his friends giving him cocked eyebrows in confusion.

Bucky could usually get any girl he wanted. Especially at a party like this one. Why was he so hell-bent on spending time with you?

"O-Oh! Sure, I'll join you." You excuse yourself from the group, and Bucky slings his arm through your waist to guide you through the crowd. You feel you stomach flip in a way you've never felt before, and feel your cheeks redden.

"So, what can I get you?" Bucky practically yells over the music, trying to meet your eyes. You avert them quickly, and simply tell him a vodka lemonade.

He hands it to you with a strange look in his eyes, and you give him a kind smile while taking your first sip.

"God, you trying to get me wasted here?" You gag with a laugh, looking into your cup and back to Bucky.

"Sorry, doll, might'a gone a bit heavy on the vodka. You still good to drink it?" He queries with genuine concern in his eyes.

And although you already well on your way to drunk, past tipsy, you give fervent nod, and give it another sip.

It was good.

-

As the night had progressed further, you had two more of Bucky's vodka lemonades.

And now, you were drunk.

You also didn't know where Natasha was, but she was probably off somewhere with Sam, so you weren't worried for her safety.

Bucky was still by your side throughout the whole night, offering to dance, and even just sit and talk.

Which is what you were doing right now. In the middle of the crowd, you were practically on top of Bucky while you two talked about anything from academics to your daily lives.

"So, in your major, what would you say was the dumbest thing someone's asked?" He laughs, and he's clearly also past the line of tipsy and has fallen into drunk, right with you.

"Uhhh... oh! One time, this guy-"

"Doll, I can't really hear ya." Bucky laughs

"Oh, sorry," You blush, trying to speak louder, but it still wasn't working.

"Do you- would you be okay with just goin' up to my room? Don't think we'll get much of anythin' done down here." He gives you a look that says 'I'm not gonna hurt you, unless you want me to.'

It sends a shiver down your spine, and you stand up, waiting for him to guide you up the stairs.

You knew you weren't going to have sex with him. You had only met him four hours ago, and no matter how many girls he could pull in that time, you were not interested in being one of them.

"Just so you know now, I'm not planning on sleeping with you." You burst out while you're halfway up the stairs, your eyes going wide at your own words.

"Huh," Bucky chuckles, "I know I have a reputation that precedes me, but I didn't think this is where that was going. Just wanted to continue to conversation." He smiles down at you, finally opening his door.

Of course, Bucky was lying right through his teeth. Of course he wanted to sleep with you. You were nice, smart, had a hell of a body, and had kept his attention the longest out of any girl he's ever met. But when it comes down to it, he was a boy.

And boys usually only thought with one organ; their dicks.

As the lamp flicks on, a small glow filters over the room, giving it a cozy feel. You, on the other hand, felt nothing but cozy.

"You can sit anywhere. Wanna watch somethin'?" He asks, tossing you the remote while you stood, frozen at the doorway.

"I- uh, sure?" You ask, more than you tell him, but sit down on his bed. You were careful to not flash him while you adjusted yourself, not sure of what to do.

The last thing you needed tonight was the most notorious playboy on campus seeing your black lace thong right now.

"Do you wanna change into somethin' more comfortable, angel?" Again, your stomach has butterflies trying to escape at his sweet words. But you knew better than to think too much into it. he probably said these names to every girl who's come into this very bed.

Ew, you think to yourself, this bed must have STDs sewn in the sheets by now.

"I- sure? If you have anything that fits, I guess." You grumble.

"Sure, I've got a t-shirt and boxers, if you want? Don't have much else, honestly." He laughs lightly, handing you the items and points to the bathroom in the corner of his room.

As you're standing in the middle of Bucky Barnes' jack and jill bathroom, you take a moment and think to yourself.

How did I get here?

Will he ask me to sleep here?

Does he still expect anything from me?

I hope not.

I'm really tired.

Ugh. Whatever. I'm too tired to think this much right now.

You pull of your dress that you couldn't stand to be in anymore, and put on the clothes Bucky had provided you with.

They were quite large on you, considering the guy was about the size of bigfoot. But you couldn't find it in yourself to complain about it right now.

You exit the bathroom, setting the dress down on the floor where you had kicked off your heels, and sit back down next to Bucky on his bed.

You feel your skin slide under the blanket that was thrown over him, and focus on the TV screen.

"So, what're we watching?" You query, trying to figure out what was playing.

Little did you know, Bucky was still thinking about the way you had looked when you walked out of the bathroom. It did something to him, seeing you in his clothes like that, for some reason.

The way you were practically swimming in them, and the way you knuckled at your eyes tiredly that made him want to hold you to his chest while you both fell asleep.

He was trying to shake the thoughts from his head, wondering what the hell had gotten into him with these thoughts.

Since when did he, Bucky Barnes, think about a girl like this? It was usually much dirtier and nastier in his head, but you were doing something to him.

"Bucky? Everything alright up there?" You giggle, knocking on his skull lightly.

"I- yeah, all good, doll." He shakes his thoughts away, focusing back on you. "I put on whatever was playing, didn't switch it because I didn't know what you liked." Bucky explains.

"Hm, well this seems good. We can just keep this on?" You suggest, realizing that Home Alone 2 was playing on his TV. "I love this movie. This kid's got some real class." You chuckle, now fully watching the movie.

"He's a genius, I'll give 'im that much." Bucky laughs, also fixing his gaze on the movie.

In the hour that passed, you two have made small talk about the movie here and there, and every time, Bucky's gaze became transfixed on you. With the glow of the TV illuminating your face, with the way you smiled and threw your head back when you laughed, he couldn't help it.

Finally, the movie had come to a close, and Bucky could tell you were fighting sleep. You were practically asleep sitting up against his headboard.

"You wanna spend the night here, doll?" He wonders out loud, looking over to you.

You shoot him a look, a playful glare with a hint of a smile.

"I mean, it's a bit late for me to head back to my dorm. But no funny business, mister." You point a finger at him, and Bucky holds his hands up in the air.

"No funny business, I promise." He holds out his pinky to you, to which you curl yours around, and latch on.

Once the lamp next to his side of the bed is turned off, you slide further down in his bed, trying to find a comfortable position. After a few minutes of adjusting, you snuggle your head into the pillows that smell like laundry detergent and his cologne.

"Goodnight, Bucky," you say out loud into the darkness while you both face each other.

"G'night doll. See ya in the morning." Bucky's voice is a low baritone, clearly about to succumb to the sleep he was fighting.

"See ya in the morning." You reply, finally letting your eyes fall shut.

That night, you dream of Bucky Barnes and his cologne.

And across from you, Bucky Barnes dreams of a world where this is normal. A world where you sleep next to him every night, and you wake him up every morning with a kiss.

Man, I'm totally fucked, is the last thought he has before falling into a sleep surrounded by you.

[mcyt-imagines]

TommyInnit Confession HCs

This is a combination of an imagine and some headcanons, this is a new way of writing for me so let me know if you enjoyed this format! 

- Tommy realising he loves the reader and how he’d confess to them - 

Tommy definitely would deny being interested in the reader in the beginning.

It would probably be a natural progression of feelings but tommy just wouldn’t realise it until WAY too late.

Like he just catches himself thinking about them when he’s just doing schoolwork and chores. And then he’s aware of just how much his mind wanders to them. Far too often in his humble opinion.

He lays hints about his crush when talking with Tubbo. He’s real defensive about it though. “You much of a ladies man Tubbo?” Trying to discretely get advice without actually asking for any. And Tubbo being Tubbo means he completely missed all the hints Tommy was dropping. (Not that Tommy’s hints were any good)

His stream for sure notices a change in his behavior, more scatterbrained showing visible signs of stress maybe a little more irritable too. Tubbo definitely notices the changes too and asks him about it. 

Tubbo would probably ask tommy on stream or in private something along the lines of. “What’s up Tommy, you’ve been kinda uh, distracted lately…”

Tommy for suuuuuure blushes and stutters out a response that even Tubbo doesn’t buy. (So instead he talks to Tubbo about it off stream, doesn’t mention his crushes name, but he keeps Tubbo in the loop. Tubbo finds the whole thing very funny because of how defensive Tommy gets in response, however he offers his support to Tommy, obviously. “Even though I have no experience with romance Tommy. I’ll do my best to be the best wingman ever!” With a salute to Tommy on his webcam. Tubbo quickly leaves the call saying he needs to do some ‘research’ (he puts the word in quotation marks with a wink)

Tommy would be a stubborn flustered MESS if stream ever figured out that he was crushing on someone.

And of course they find out because Tubbo slips up and mentions Tommy having a crush.

By that point he is absolutely CONSUMED by his thoughts about the reader as the more he tries to not think about them the more he wishes he was with them.

He also would 10000% be ignoring or avoiding his crush for as long as possible because he knows he wouldn’t be able to utter a single word to their face. His usual ‘big man’ façade would be in absolute shambles if he were around the reader during this time.

There would be a lot of internal and external swearing from Tommy when he finally realises and accepts that he likes you though.

However, this acceptance doesn’t make him any less stressed because now he needs to figure out whether he is even going to tell you!

But he knows he can’t keep living like this as he can’t keep avoiding his crush forever. And he knows the next time he sees you he knows his heart is going to literally burst out of his chest. And he won’t be able to stop himself. So, he devises a plan.

He gets a pep talk from Tubbo in which they help brainstorm his confession plan but he finds himself messaging Wilbur one late night after his stream. “Hey, can I get some advice?” Wilbur is shocked. “Tommyinnit asking ME for advice? Never thought I’d see the day.”

Wilbur teases him for a short while surely. But when Tommy finally puts his pride aside and tells Wilbur about his crush he sobers up quick and dishes out some solid advice and support for Tommy. “In exchange for my services I better be meeting this crush of yours Tommy.” “You got it big man.”

After speaking with Wilbur Tommy feels as if he can finally breathe for the first time in weeks since he first started to realise his feelings for the reader.

CONFESSION DAY!

Tommy sends the reader a text in the mid-morning asking if they wanted to hang out sometime later today. Also apologizing for how ‘busy’ he’s been the last few weeks using schoolwork or chores as his excuse.

He’s furiously texting Tubbo the WHOLE time he’s waiting for a reply from them. Tubbo pulls Tommy onto Minecraft to try and take his mind off the situation. Offline of course, Tommy would not be able to handle streaming right now.

Even Wilbur sends him a few messages to check in, jumping on discord to give his ear for Tommy to chew off. Which he most definitely does.

Eventually his phone dings and Tommy DIVES for it. “THEY SAID YES!” Both Wilbur and Tubbo groan from Tommy’s mic peaking with his screech.

Tommy waits for a few minutes before replying per Tubbo’s request. “I read it online! You don’t want to seem too into them.” He proclaims with false authority as Wilbur chuckles in the background of the call.

The rest of the afternoon blurs for Tommy as he stays on call with Wilbur and Tubbo as they do their best to distract his overactive mind.

However, as the clock ticks on he knows he needs to start getting ready or he’s going to be late.

Wilbur demands that he choose Tommy’s outfit. So for the next half hour Tommy proceeds to perform a free fashion show for the two, only for Phil to join for a short while to give his two cents before going back to his stream.

Eventually Wilbur settles on what he dubbed “-a classic Tommyinnit look-” one of his favourite red shirts paired with one of his nicer black jackets and the dark charcoal pants his mum had made him get a few months ago for a wedding. They are very uncomfortable.

Tommy heaves a sigh as he thanks Wilbur and Tubbo for sticking around with him today. They both send him away, “Good luck Tommy!” “Go get ‘em big man.”

Tommy had agreed to meet the reader at the park, he thought dinner would have been a bit much. Wilbur and Tubbo both agreed on that front. This park was right near the water, so it had a great view of the sunset. He was still pretty chuffed about that fact, his chat was sooo wrong, he could be romantic if he wanted to after all.

Of course, he was a little late. He repeatedly told his mum to speed. She refused of course. His mother of course had noticed exactly what this ‘hang out’ was and had quizzed him about his crush the night prior.

“Don’t leave the car mum.” Tommy was quick to warn her, he did not want her to be anywhere near them. She didn’t need any more dirt on him to embarrass him with. She could end his whole streaming career in an instant if she wanted. A truly terrifying thought.

Tommy was quick to move near the waterfront puffing slightly, nose a tinge pink with the oncoming chilly wind from the lake. “Hey Tommy.” Tommy would freeze instantly before quickly turning with a forced smile, a little too big for his face. “Hey!”

His crush would lead Tommy over to the nearby bench they had been sitting on before he arrived. And they would definitely sit closer to Tommy than he would have wanted.

Tommy would be so obvious. Stuttering over his words, a LOT of frantic hand movements whenever he’s speaking to them.

Mid-conversation his crush starts to laugh. “Tommy I think I’ve figure out why you have been ‘busy’ recently.” Tommy stills immediately, sweat dripping off of him in POOLS. “H-Huh!?” He makes a noise in the back of his throat that he has NEVER made before.

This seems to only make his crush laugh more, they turn fully to him and take one of his clammy hands. He quickly goes to yank it from their grip knowing how sweaty it is. But their grip is strong, and surprisingly calm in contrast to his shaking hands. He gulps simply staring at the spot where their hands are touching. “Tommy.” His gaze snaps up to their smiling face hiding slight worry. “Breathe.” And he finally does. His tense shoulders drop, and their hand leaves his. And suddenly he’s laughing harder than he ever has before realizing how ridiculous he’s being right now. And when he looks over, so is his crush.

The conversation from that point on flows naturally as the two finally begin to catch up after not seeing each other for a few weeks.

Tommy finally realises how comfortable they make him feel. He simply stares at them as they speak. Awed that it took him this damn long to figure out he liked them.

His crush stops talking, noticing him staring. He jumps out of his thoughts, “Hey Tommy, take a picture it’ll last longer.” And suddenly he’s sweating all over again as they laugh.

His crush is having the time of their life watching ‘big man’ Tommy squirm beside them. Trying his best to scrounge up the courage to say something, anything to them.

They open their mouth to speak when suddenly Tommy yells, “I LIKE YOU!”

Tommy isn’t even looking at them, he has his eyes squeezed shut and he thrusts his arm outwards holding something which promptly shoves into his crush’s chest. Effectively winding them.

They wheeze in response, “Me too. Don’t know why though goD!” They push out through gasps of air, pressing a hand to their chest. Pain beginning to subside as Tommy realises he literally just punched his crush.

His jaw drops and his silence continues as they take what was in his hands. A small book.

A scrapbook.

His crush’s face softens as they flip through the photos, memories flooding back to them of days long gone by.

Tommy stayed up all night yesterday just to finish the final details on the scrapbook, it isn’t the most aesthetically pleasing thing. (Even he knows that) But he put his heart and soul into it.

“Very sweet of you Tommy. But I didn’t bring anything for you…” They end up mumbling in response. Tommy only grins. “So you like it?” They scoff and finally pull Tommy in for a hug. He stills for a moment, then melts into their hold.

Tommy mumbles his apology for literally punching them into his crush’s hair. They giggle into his chest in response, letting him know that it’s fine, they’re okay. Tommy mumbles something incoherent into their hair and presses a cautionary kiss to the top of their head.

“AWWWWW!” A loud noise comes from behind their bench. Tommy and his crush dive apart only to see Tommy’s mum hidden behind a nearby tree.

“MUUUUUUUUUM!” Tommy screeches as his crush cackles out a laugh.

Tommy’s mum ends up driving his crush home as well, they sit in the back seat of the car holding hands.

“This didn’t go at all how I’d planned…” Tommy complains with a deep pout. “Oh really? Your plan didn’t involve punching me? Huh?” Their crush sniggers at him.

“Oh! His real plan-“ His mother starts and in order to cut her off Tommy just starts yelling at the top of his lungs “Nononono!!”. Causing his crush to burst into laughter as the two try to increase their volumes to drown out the other.

His crush shakes their head with a grin and wonders what the hell they’ve just gotten themselves into.

[dimitrescus-bitch]

New York City Standard (Veronica Lodge x Reader)

“Hermione, thank you so much for inviting to come and stay with you. Riverdale is an absolutely charming little town,” you thanked your exgirlfriend’s mother. Technically, you and Veronica had never broken up when she left New York, but she had essentially stopped talking to you. You understand that it was hard for her, but now that her father was out of the picture once again, things should have been easier for the two of you to rekindle what you had before. 

“The pleasure is mine. It’s been far too long dear. How have you been?” Hermione asked you. She had always liked you. Hiram, on the other hand, hated you and the fact that your ambitions didn’t necessarily benefit your family’s business. You were your own person and you’d definitely influenced Veronica a bit to seek out her own path, which he hated. 

“Very well. I’ve been accepted into Columbia for a pre-law program and if all goes well with that, I’ll have my choice at a number of ivy leagues for an official law program,” you told her. “Has Veronica mentioned college?” 

“She has been a bit reluctant to speak with me lately. I’m hoping that you will remind her of a better time.” Hermione led you through their home and knocked on a door. “Mija, you have a visitor.” 

“Okay, just a second!” Veronica called back. Your heart skipped a beat at the sound of her voice, a sense of nostalgia taking over. You smiled a little as Hermione walked away and you were left standing in front of Veronica’s door. She opened it up and paused for a moment, almost as if she couldn’t believe that you were standing in front of her. “Y/n?” 

“Hello Veronica, may I come in?” you asked and Veronica stepped aside. You noticed two people sitting in her bed, a boy on her bed and a girl sitting hunched over a book. 

“Um, guys this is Y/n Y/l/n, she was my best friend in New York. Y/n, this is Betty and my boyfriend, Archie,” Veronica introduced you. You offered both of them smiles, even as they both eyed you suspiciously. “She’s nothing like Nick. In fact, she probably hates him more than anyone else.” 

“Veronica, I see that you’re busy, but when you’re free, I’d love to go to dinner. It’s been far too long since we’ve had quality time, lovely.” You leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the corner of Veronica’s mouth. “It was nice to meet the two of you. Hopefully, we will become better acquainted during my visit.” 

“How long are you staying?” Veronica asked you and you shrugged. 

“I don’t really know yet, but hopefully by the time I leave, we’ll have arrangements for you to come into the city with me. It’s been horribly boring without you.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

“You know, Archie is suspicious of your intentions being here,” Veronica said as the two of you sat in her living room having some drinks. “He thinks you’re here to steal me away from him.” 

“Technically, he’s the thief. We never really broke up, you just stopped answering,” you pointed out. Veronica looked down, guilt evident on her face. “I’m not mad though, that was a whole shit show of a situation. I also didn’t really expect for you to be that into me.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“I was always like your little show pony. The progressive streak to distract from the fact that everybody assumed your family was corrupt. They don’t care about embezzling whenever the golden daughter is dating the troubled black sheep from the business rival family. It’s a miracle that your dad didn’t try to have me whacked or something after he caught us kissing.” 

“Too obvious, and he wasn’t the only one who saw that,” Veronica told you. You sighed as you took a sip of your drink before setting it down on the table. “Besides, where is your evidence I didn’t beg him not to kill you? I meant it when I told you that I love you Y/n.” 

“Yeah, but if you said it again, would you still mean it?” you asked her. Veronica sighed and you laughed at her. 

“What’s funny?” Veronica asked you. 

“The golden boy found the golden girl. You’re just golden by New York City Standards. He’d crumble against the concrete if you weren’t behind him.” 

“And let me guess, you’d soar from building top to building top?” 

“Damn right Lodge.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

“Why is she still here?” Archie asked as you walked into Pop’s. “Veronica, you said she went back to the city Friday.” 

“She did, I watched her plane take off,” Veronica promised him. She was puzzled as to why you were there, but the second she saw the familiar mauve box in your hands, she knew what was going on. “You’re a character, you know.” 

“I’ve been told, but you wouldn’t refuse the best pastry in New York City, would you?” You held the box out towards Veronica. She took it from you and nodded at the empty spot in the booth across from her and Archie. “Afternoon Andrews.” 

“We’re sort of on a date here, if you don’t mind,” Archie said, his voice sounding agitated. 

“Oh no, I don’t mind one bit,” you laughed melodically. Archie muttered something under his breath and Veronica smiled as she saw the heart shaped scone. “I would have brought you coffee, but it would have gone cold. I dropped grounds off at your house though on my way here.” 

“Of course you did,” Archie scoffed. “You know that you can’t win her by buying her love. Maybe you could have before, but not anymore.” 

“I am not trying to buy her love Andrews. I’m giving a gift to my best friend. She doesn’t get to the city very often and I know that this place is her favorite. I’m sure if you were moved away from your home, you’d want someone to bring you Pop’s?” 

“Let’s go Veronica.” Archie got out of the booth and you set the money for his order on the table. 

“It’s on me, sorry for ruining your meal. Veronica, I assure you it’s not what I mean to do,” you promised her. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

“You really are an asshole,” Veronica said as she caught you coming out of your hotel. “Archie is nice and I was happy before you showed up.” 

“Veronica, I’m sorry. I really am,” you told her. She grabbed your arm and tugged you away from your cab. “I’ve got a plane to catch.” 

“Is there room for one more?” Veronica asked you. “I want to go with you to the city. Even if it’s just for a little bit, I miss it. This place has made me soft. I’m not up to standard.” 

“Maybe you were always a bit soft and that’s why I liked you,” you suggested. “Maybe you could make me soft and that’s why I fell in love with you.” 

“Then, let me come with you for your sake,” Veronica offered. You nodded and opened the car door for her. 

“About your boyfriend?” you asked Veronica as you turned your head to look at her. 

“He hasn’t been my boyfriend since you crashed our date. Jughead is dealing with that aftermath and Betty’s just telling me not to screw this up too badly a second time,” Veronica said and you smiled a little. “I think she liked you too.” 

“So, when you find yourself coming back here, I’m allowed to call and visit you?” you asked and Veronica nodded. “Good.” 

Taglist: @storiesofsvu​ @xixxiixx​

[kadeu]

THE DECK; OCTOBER 2024

Sweet breeze! Good riddance summer. Now, usually we adore the summer season, the fashion, the events, the lively shows and all the trouble the socialites get up to. And yes, the fashion was there but eyepatches in the heat are not ideal. Our beloved socialites flocked to the beach and we have enough tales of drunken debauchery yes, and even those who remained in the city with their enchanted blocks of ice and selective guest lists, we still have heard the deeds. But the heat, something about this summer’s heat, made it not as enjoyable.

Speaking of the beach, there is mourning up in the highranked hills of Diamonds. Once Kings, demoted in scandal to Jacks, the Sobongs have met rough waters while enjoying what was supposed to be a calming row out to sea in Umibe. Their staff reported that, “the once peaceful seas suddenly became enraged as if a Tempest beset it and pulled them under.” The Sobong fortune is now up in the air as the only true heir, their son Korain, has long been presumed dead. Korain's only heir is none other than Ace of Diamonds Moon Ara, but sources say the Sobong's will doesn't name their estranged granddaughter at all. 

It is rather fortunate though, inheriting a vast sum, especially when one half of the marital income pool couldn’t even afford box seats at the other’s place of employment. We wonder just how much money is in that estate. Enough to kill for? Only time will tell.

In Hearts, once jeweler to the elite facecards yet now blacklisted from those circles, Lee Hyeonju seems to be looking from Hearts for a way into Diamonds. Formerly disgraced now reinstated Academy Professor Parker Luke, seems to have accepted the advances of Hyeonju and has been spotted every night for two whole weeks within his apartment. Sources close to both men say that Hyeonju has been giving the professor the royal treatment in hopes he sponsors his defection!

Whispers throughout Heart society say that the Ace of Hearts, once an avid patron of Hyeonju’s has refused his service in lieu of newly popular Fae artisans. The Ace’s mood as of late is unreadable on that topic, but sources say Hyeonju has been barred from his presence and that has other highrankers and artisans have been following suit, preferring to not gain the Ace’s disfavor. This has lead to instability in Hyeonju’s prospects in Hearts. No wonder he is looking to flee to Diamonds. 

But he’s not the only one out of favor in Hearts. Ex-courtesan turned restaurant owner, Meesong Nari has been seen without her usual entourage of Zuihuo guards and attendants. Rumor has it she has been kicked from that mansion she was gifted and the Clan favor mark is gone from her arm. Not sure what she did to separate herself from that protection and comfort but we are sure all those bridges she burned ascending in the ranks will happily revisit her. They tell us as kids right? What goes up must come down. Watch your back Nari.

THE TENSION BETWEEN CLUBS AND SPADES;

Amidst the growing tensions between Clubs and Spades, Ace of Clubs Mallick Sai Shah,  held the opening for his Hunter’s Lair. It seems it was mostly a hit, with fights breaking out away from the venue, not in it! One club said, “it’s better to just enjoy things now than wait for whatever comes next,” and we’re considering stitching it on tunics and selling them as aid relief! Business owners suffering from Spade mandated ban through the Joker found it hard to mingle and feast while their own stores suffered. Worse, a gag order was in place against all negative comments on Spades. We sense a lot of fake smiles and grumblings over bread but can’t confirm as we were refused an exclusive invite to report the event!

Still, as an unbiased news source, we gladly accepted the request for a sit down with Ace Shah to address the actions taken in his faction. Our reporter braved the streets of Clubs to give a completely impartial interview. 

How has it been as an Ace? The jump from low ranker to sitting atop the faction must be hard.

Hard? Surprising and unexpected would be the words I would use to describe how this whole situation feels. I used to be a highranker after all and making my way up to even higher ranks before a tragedy struck me, was that an unknown fact?

But you’ve never been Ace? How is that jump?

No, never been. The title itself is not omnipotent, it has its limitations and brings forth unwanted attention that stands in the way of the current progress we wish to bring to the faction. But it's an important role even if only in word, one has to still use it respectably. But the short answer is the jump is still happening. Ask again in a few years when I've landed where it takes me.

How did you think of the Club council? Is it true you were inspired by the Diamond council?

I didn’t think of the Club council, it was a meeting of minds, I wouldn’t have been able to have any council at all if it was only my contribution going into the making of said council. While I have a deep respect for Diamonds and how they tend to go about their politics, I can’t say I was thinking about them when the idea came to be, I was more concerned on how it would affect Clubs in general and how it would be accepted within the faction. But I can now see why they have one, it has its benefits and I applaud them for having the idea to immediately instill it in their system.

How many people really support you as ex-resistance? Can we even believe you’ve left the criminal enterprise?

I can’t possibly begin to tell who truly supports me as ex-resistance or not, but so far I haven’t had anyone personally challenge me in the faction so in this case I think that means even through reticence people might just believe in the good I want for this faction. 

That’s definitely a tough one, all I can say is I was young, hurt and I made mistakes. If I can be forgiven for them then I will be happy, if not I will understand. However, to be judged for the mistakes of your pasts when you’ve recognized them and clearly show that you’ve completely turned away from them, that’s an unfortunate way to see the world or the people around us if you ask me. But yes, to your question, you can believe that I’ve left the criminal enterprise.

I suppose you maintain your innocence in the killing and raid on spade? If you didn’t do it then who is behind such a foul act?

I absolutely do, I had nothing to do with the unfortunate incident even if allegations brought forth the information that some key evidence might link me to it. My hands are clean and I can’t even begin to think of who would be behind this. But whoever it is, the council has decided to lead an investigation into the matter because it’s not just my name and reputation that is on the line, it is also the honor of this faction that will be yet again tarnished. If you find any more clues before we do, I’m certain you’ll pass the message to the rest of the city, won’t you?

Of course! So you suppose you are being framed? Why would anyone frame an already known murderer?

I don’t take lightly to being called a murderer, but if that’s a title I have to wear for ridding the faction of an Ace who cared none for the lives of the people he wanted to lead to an unending civil war and unrest, then there’s not much I can do about it. But yes, I’m being framed, because of the criminal enterprise’s affiliation I had in the past and the label of murderer I have on my back. I mean, wouldn’t you say it’s easier to believe that I would be the one behind someone’s death and demise considering those two demeaning factors? It’s even a little unfair to not see how blatantly obvious they went about it.

You must know, the Academy was attacked a few years ago with your resistance taking ownership. Were you not involved?

The resistance I was part of and that I do not own, you mean? I did hear of it when the incident occurred. I was not involved and I found it disheartening. I'm against attacking innocents and causing the loss of innocent lives.

We’ve heard that your people were harassing Spades in your faction? Our sources say, ‘Urine and feces were tossed on a patron in a popular tavern for saying ‘Spades should be respected.’ Should Spades not be respected?

I’ve had no time to hear these rumors but of course Spades should be respected. Everyone deserves respect for that matter, tossing urine and feces doesn’t seem like a respectful action taken either. But if this rumor is true I can simply apologize for the mistreatment and ask that less impulsive measures are taken in the future because, as you can see, I don’t have any means to control anyone to stop tragedies from occurring. If I did you wouldn’t be here as no shipment would have been ambushed and no lives would have been lost. Unfortunate, isn’t it?

This Ace of Clubs only brings more questions when questions are asked.  He made it clear to our interviewer that the resistance was a mistake he made in youth and he acknowledges them as all as criminals. He even seemed scared to admit the inspiration for the council he created in Clubs. Maybe those on his council are the real danger here. ‘A meeting of minds’ he claims, but it sounds more like he was coerced by darker agents. We’re certain this council is filled with the same resistance criminals he is trying so hard to claim he has separated himself from.

And yet he proclaims his innocence, insists he is being framed. In round about words he points to some conspiracy with no proof of innocence offered. And where is this council if they are unified in their ruling? Should they not have joined this interview to show their unified cause? The future of Clubs is bound to be as blood soaked under this Ace as the last. At least that Ace stood solidly on one point without a questionable background and motive. 

His unwillingness to out other vagrants that would no doubt bring that peace to the faction like he claims to want, make his alleged innocence and investigation a joke. Our own investigation finds King of Clubs, Wainwright Rook, with high suspicion for the fight that broke out in his tavern. There a Spade had feces and urine thrown on them which led to a brawl that left the very foundation of the tavern with a cracked that travelled up the building.  Yet Ace Shah acts ignorant of it. No wonder Spades must do their own investigation.

In Spades, they are increasing drills and the policing of their border. We wonder if an invasion will come soon. Whispers amongst their ranks lean to disdain for the Club Council. Refugees who chose to leave the safety of Spades were met at the border with medical personnel and fighters as if the Club Council thought that Spades were abusing those they rescued during the terror of the war between their last Ace and the new one and his resistance criminals. The council passing suspicion to Spades who have done more for their corner of the city is laughable.

Well, at least the weather is cooling down. Hopefully that eases some of the tensions. The weather is predicted to be far more comfortable though still a bit warmer for the season. We’re calling it a second attempt at summer.  

NOW PLAYING AT THE PALACE;

Fresh from the mind of director Ace Moon Ara, comes a gruesome tale of lost love and revenge. With intense, dark themes, The Palace recommends not bringing children to this production and reminds all of it’s patrons that the theater is NOT responsible for the adverse affects the production may have on younger minds or weak stomachs.

The Fiendish Barber of Kadeu

Evil Judge Turpin (Budrelda Beryl) lusts for the beautiful wife of a simple barber, Benjamin Barker (Adrian!). In order to claim the beautiful woman for herself, Turpin frames the barber, and has him transported to a far away prison for a crime he did not commit. Returning after 15 years and calling himself Sweeney Todd - the new name given to him by the fiend he managed to conscript, the now-mad man vows revenge, applying his razor to unlucky customers and shuttling the bodies down to Mrs. Lovett (played by Ara’s protégé from Wing Theatrics), who uses them in her meat-pie shop. Though many fall to his blade, he will not be satisfied until he slits Turpin's throat.

Its a wonderful start to the fall season, our reporters loved their screening but warn of its hauntingly good effects.

[evolmaze]

not like this

summary - you go to a party ready to hang out with your friends, but your best friend has other ideas that involve you, a closet, seven minutes, and a close friend you swore you’d never tell

pairing - jin x reader ft. other members of bts and other o.c.s!

genre - fluff, angst | ftl!au, nonidol!au

word count - 5.0k words

warnings - mentions of drinking, otherwise nothing else!

a/n: this is totally inspired by that one episode of New Girl where Nick and Jess are stuck behind the door and Nick tells Jess that he doesn’t want kiss her, “not like this” hence the title lol. Not quite the same plotline, but was definitely my inspiration for it!

masterlist

You had always loved Saturday nights, the one day a week where you could literally do nothing all day and not feel guilty about it. The one night a week where you got to see most of your friends, hang out, and of course, get tipsy and play a bunch of stupid games; tonight was no different.

You had arrived at your friend Alexa’s house, a little late, and by the looks of it, you were the last to arrive. Your friend group wasn’t enormously big, just around six or so depending on the night, any more and things usually got out of hand. There was you, Alexa, your mutual friend Lia, and then the boys: Yoongi, Jin, and Namjoon. You all had become friends while in university, and you’re happy to say you were able to remain friends afterward. Sometimes the boys would bring their other friends, ones they had met through work, and tonight you were happy to see Jimin, Tae, Jungkook, and Hoseok here as well. You didn’t know them as well, but every time you hung with them, they had been nothing but kind. If you’re honest, the people you knew best here were Jin and Alexa, the three of you had lived in the same dorm freshman year, and since then, you had been inseparable.

“y/n!” Alexa called excitedly, crossing the room to greet you. “I was afraid you weren’t gonna make it!”

“Sorry,” you exclaimed, “Literally got halfway here and realized I had forgotten the chips!” she laughed, taking them from you, and setting them on the counter next to the taco dip; a classic staple in your university days. “I see everyone else is already here.” you mused, scanning the room.

“Yeah, don’t worry though, Jimin and Tae literally got here five minutes before you,” she laughed, and set a hand on your shoulder, slightly turning you towards the back of the room. “But he’s been here all night, asking me every couple minutes if I’ve heard from you,” she whispered, you were sure she was wiggling her eyebrows at you.

You looked across the room, and saw Jin, laughing with Hoseok and Jungkook. He hadn’t seen you yet, and selfishly you loved that you were able to stare at him carefree, taking in all the things you loved about him. You hadn’t seen him in a while, school kept you both busy, and with both of you working part time jobs, a couple weeks had gone by since your last hang out. God how you had missed him. 

“You’re staring..” Alexa chuckled, as your best friend, and friend who had also known Jin the longest, she knew all about your crush on him. She was actually the one who called you out on it first, and from then on, she loved to tease you about it, but in all honesty, if she didn’t know, and wasn’t there for you to give advice or listen to you rant, you’re sure you would have gone insane by now.

“Ahhh, yeah,” you laughed nervously, tearing your view from him, and facing her. “God, it’s getting worse isn’t it?”

“Noooo,” she said, obviously lying, but you appreciated the false confidence. “Okay, maybe, but you’re in love, how else are you supposed to cope with that?”

“Oooh, I’d say drinking my sorrows away so I don’t have to think about how he’ll never like me back.” you laughed, grabbing a drink from the cooler. Alexa looked at you, concerned. “Lex I’m fine, seriously. I’ve come to terms with it, and at this point, he’s just a placeholder till I find someone new.”

“I’ve always said this, and I stand by it: Jin is so fucking stupid. Thick as a brick.”

“Yah!” he suddenly called from across the room. “Alexa are you talking shit?” you laughed, trying to figure out how much he heard.

“Absolutely not,” she said, looking towards you. “But y/n totally was!”

“Lex!” you yelled, embarrassed. You looked up, making eye contact with Jin, and his face lit up. 

“y/n! Why didn’t you tell me you were here?” he said, coming over to you. Alexa winked and left to go talk to Lia. He came up to you, immediately crushing you in a hug. Your face was right up against his chest, you could smell his cologne, and god was it intoxicating. 

“Sorry, I literally just got here!” you said, pulling your head back to look at him, he smiled down at you, his arms around your waist. You could stay like this forever.

“Hmmm, I suppose I can forgive you then.” he joked, slowly letting go of you, his fingers lingering a little too long. You tried your best to remain calm, and not think about the way it felt to be held by him. He cleared his throat, taking a slight step back, you looked at him expectantly. “Whatcha drinking?” he asked, and you held up your drink you had grabbed earlier. “Oh,” he laughed, ears turning red in embarrassment, and you grinned, god you loved this man.

----

The night had progressed rather smoothly, you were impressed. Usually, nights like this took a turn for the worst during a game of Pictionary, but so far, things had been fine! Everyone seemed to be having a great time, and you couldn’t have been happier. Currently, you all sat in a circle playing a childish game of never have I ever. You knew these were childish, but secretly you loved them, all the games you never got to play in high school cause you didn’t go to parties. Except instead of fingers down, everyone also took a shot. Currently, Jimin and Lia were tied for first place with each having nine out of ten fingers down. You only had four down, but it didn’t really matter.

“Never have I ever recreated the scene from titanic in front of the whole school only to realize Rose was played by my professor,” Tae snickered, looking directly at Jimin.

“Not fair,” he laughed, putting a finger down, and taking a shot. “That’s targeting!” everyone laughed, and Jimin grinned, taking a seat back down.

“Okay okay okay,” Alexa said suddenly, gathering everyone’s attention. “Let’s switch up the game, we’ve been playing this for an hour, and if Jimin has to take one more shot, I don’t want to be the one responsible for taking him to the hospital tonight.”

“I’m fine!” he laughed, and it was mildly true, everyone here seemed to have a pretty high tolerance, and being out of university, it seems the activities had mildly mellowed out. No excessive drinking tonight. 

“Okay, what game are you thinking of Lex?” Lia asked, and Alexa paused before getting a thoughtful look on her face. 

You watched as she looked towards you, a knowing glint in her eyes. “Since we’re on a roll with high school parties games, why not a fun couple rounds of seven minutes in heaven?” The group was split, some laughed in encouragement, while others, like yourself, seemed confused, you all were friends wouldn’t that be weird? “Okay wait, let me finish. We’ll switch up the rules so it’s not weird. The two people can go in there and decide what to do, kiss or take two shots each.”

You laughed, it seemed stupid still, but why the hell not? You were probably a little tipsy at this point, so why not indulge in this juvenile game. “How do we decide who goes in?” you asked.

“We’ll start with a random person to go in the closet, and then the group decides who goes in after them. But the catch is, the person alone in the closet has to face the wall so they cant see who comes in with them. So since they can’t see each other, in order to drink or kiss, they have to correctly guess who it is. Make sense?” Everyone nodded, and you eagerly awaited to see who was first.

“Who wants to go first?” Jimin asked, and the group went silent. “What about y/n?” you looked up, confused.

“Why me?” you questioned.

“Why not?” he questioned back, and you laughed. 

“Okay fine,” you agreed, looking down at everyone as you stood up. “Alright, whichever one of you comes in, be ready to take shots!” everyone laughed, and you grinned, making eye contact with Alexa, that same stupid glint in her eye.

“Don’t sound so sure,” she laughed, and you blushed, quickly turning towards the closet. You opened the door, and entered, shutting it behind you. You wondered who they would send it, though with Alexa's knowing look you had a feeling it wasn't going to be good. It was a mystery how much time had passed by the time you heard the door open behind you.

“Hello mystery stranger,” you called, waiting for the door to shut again before turning around. 

“You have seven minutes, y/n!” Alexa called, followed by a chorus of cheers. “Guess correctly and you can thank me later!”

You furrowed your eyebrows at that, that must have been a clue, right? “Hmm, how should I go about this, because I’m assuming you’re not allowed to speak, right? That’d make it too easy,” you pondered, and with no response from the person in front of you, you presumed you were right.

“Okay, I have an idea.” you declared, holding your hands out in front of you. “My hands are in front of you right now, grab one of them.” You waited patiently for them to do so, and soon enough you felt something hit the side of your hand. “That’s my hand, grab it.”

They grabbed your hand, and you immediately registered that they had large hands, long fingers, there was no way this was Lia or Lexa, they both had comically small hands. On second thought, so did Jimin, so that left the rest of the boys. “Here’s what I’m thinking, I’ll ask you a series of questions, and if the answer is yes then squeeze my hand once, if it’s no, then squeeze my hand twice. Make sense?”

One squeeze. “Okay, cool cool. Let’s see,” you pondered, trying to think of a question that would get the most people out at once. “Oh! Okay, do you have roommates?”

Two squeezes, “Okay, well that rules out Jungkook and Tae since they live together.  Do you have a pet?”

Two squeezes again, “Well alright, then you’re not Namjoon or Yoongi either. So you’re either Hoseok or Jin.” you stalled for a second, wondering what the odds were that this was Jin in front of you. Alexa wouldn’t do that to you would she? Who are you kidding, she’s tipsy, of course, she would. Your heartbeat increased mildly at the possibility that this was Jin and the possibility that you two would kiss, but you knew deep down that if it was him, you’d rather just take shots because kissing him in this closet was not at all how you wanted to do it.

“Final question,” you said aloud, figuring out what you would ask. “Do you feel strongly about the financial crisis in Ecuador?” A laugh from the person in front of you confirmed your suspicions, it was Jin. Whenever the two of you were together and ran out of things to talk about, he would always ask you the most random of questions, that one is one of his favorites. 

“I feel very strongly about it, almost as strongly as I feel about the American peanut butter famine of 1834,” he joked, and you laughed, it was such a dumb joke, but it got you every single time. It absolutely had nothing to do with him, and you thinking he was the funniest person alive, not at all.

The two of you quieted down, and you heard Jimin call for four minutes left. Suddenly, you remembered why you were here, and what you had to decide. “So,” you said, trying to decide how you were gonna get out of this. “How’s it going?”

“Oh you know, just grand,” he said, and you heard him shifting his weight from one foot to another. It was then that you also realized he was still holding your hand, cute. “You have a decision to make, don’t you?” he asked, and you blushed, thank god for the darkness of this closet.

“I think it’s a group consensus, no?” you asked.

Jin chuckled, and you felt his thumb run over your knuckles, your mind raced at the feeling. “I mean sure, but I’m cool with either.” You were pretty sure that you died of cardiac failure after he said that, there was no way he had just said that.  “Plus the idea of taking two shots right now makes me wanna die,”

“Hmm, you did kinda suck at taking shots,” you joked, trying to ease your nerves, and he playfully swatted your shoulder. Your hand hung loosely at your side, and you took the moment to wipe the sweat off on your jeans. “So you’re cool with either? You’re sure?” you asked, your voice slightly panicky.

You sensed his arm moved as it wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You held your breath, what the fuck was going on. “I’m sure, are you?”

You felt your head get fuzzy and you weren’t sure if it was from the alcohol or the way you could feel each of his fingers as they rested on the small of your back, but you definitely weren’t sober anymore. “I don’t want to kiss you in the closet,” you said quickly, your hand instinctively balling into a fist. “Not like this.”

“What do you mean?” he asked quietly, a touch of hurt in his voice, your heart ached at the sound. “Would you rather take the shots?”

“No, no, no,” you said frantically, releasing his hand and taking a step back. Even though you knew this was low risk, you’d have to absolutely be blind to not understand the elephant in this closet with you two, you still felt terrified of rejection. “I-I can’t see you, I want to be able to see you.”

At that moment, the door flung open, the light from the outside streaming in, and all you saw was Jin’s face as he looked at you as if he had never seen you before. You wanted to cry, but instead, you pushed past him, and grabbed a bottle of peppermint schnapps off the counter, quickly downing two shots, before going out onto the porch. You absolutely needed some air. 

The commotion from inside followed you faintly as you shut the door, everyone was confused, but drunk enough to move on rather quickly, sending Jungkook into the closet, before sending someone else in after him. You paid them no mind, too busy feeling sorry for yourself that even when the moment was perfect, you still found a way to ruin it for yourself. He had literally told you he wanted to kiss you, and you had ruined it with your stupid insecurities, go figure.

The sliding door opened and you looked up as he stepped out onto the porch, blanket in one hand, and two water bottles in the other. “Mind if I join you?” you said nothing, but nodded in response, and he offered you water, and you took it before he sat next to you. You watched out of the corner of your eye as he wrapped the blanket around him, and it was in that moment that you remembered it was November. Unconsciously, you pulled your knees up, wrapping your arms around them, wishing you had grabbed your jacket. “Here,” he said suddenly, opening up one side of his blanket cocoon. “We can share.”

You peered at him hesitantly, before opting in because even your pride was willing to leave for warmth. He wrapped the blanket around you both, and you moved closer to him in an attempt to get the blanket around the both of you completely. Aside from your shoes peeking out, the both of you were completely submerged, he must have found the biggest blanket in the apartment. You peered up at him and watched as he stared at the street before you, not thinking twice of it, you rested your head on his shoulder. “Jin, I’m sorry for freaking out earlier.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he said, looking down at you. “You were uncomfortable, I should have been more aware.”

“I wasn’t that uncomfortable,” you muttered, and he chuckled.

“y/n you were actually shaking at one point,” you laughed at that, he was right.

“Okay, fine, but I was only uncomfortable with the circumstances, not the idea behind them,” you paled when you realized what you said, but when Jin wrapped his arm around you, pulling you even closer to him, you relaxed a little. 

“Oh so what you’re saying is that I didn’t need to take two shots?”

“Hmmm, maybe not,” you mused, and he laughed. “And neither did I.”

“So why did you?” he asked, the smile dropping from your face as you thought about how you were gonna explain this.

“Jin, I-” you said, your heart rate picking up with each passing moment; it was now or never. “I really like you, I have feelings for you so strong I feel like going crazy sometimes. I’m sure you already knew because Alexa has a big mouth, and I’m the least subtle person on the planet, but that’s why I took the shots.”

“You took the shots instead of kissing me because you like me?”

“Ah no,” you grumbled, getting stressed that he wasn’t getting it. “I took the shots because I didn’t want my first kiss to be in the dark, especially with you.”

“Ahhh, I see what you mean,” he said, a faint smile on his face. He looked down at you, and you felt all the air leave your body as you registered the look in his eyes. It was the exact same as yours had been earlier when you saw him. He had never looked at you like that, at least to your memory. He had, you had just never noticed. 

“I just, I just want to be able to see you,” you said quietly, unable to move, stuck in the way he looked at you. “I’ve never kissed anyone before, and I don’t want to mess up.”

Jin grinned, “You can’t mess up, y/n.” he assured you, and you blushed. 

“I don’t know, I’m pretty clumsy sometimes,” you pondered, you honestly had no idea how to do it, so chances were that you would mess it up. Jin was older than you, a year or so, and you’ve seen him with a number of girls, so you were pretty positive you were the inexperienced one in this pair. 

“It’s pretty simple,” he mused, reaching up to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. “I could teach you.” Your heart skipped a beat at his sultry tone, he was absolutely gonna be the death of you. “I’m sure you’d be a quick learner.”

“I’m sure you’d be a good teacher,” you said, and his ears turned a nice shade of pink. You mentally grinned at your ability to fluster him, even in this frenzied state. 

“So what do you say?” he asked, running his hand down your arm to grab your hand again. Goosebumps appeared in succession, as you realized where this was going. “Is it bright enough out here for you?”

“It’s perfect,” you whispered, grinning as he smiled at you. “You’re perfect, you know that right?”

“Says you,” he cooed, “You know how long I’ve waited for a moment like this? I like you so much, y/n, it actually drives me crazy how amazing and perfect you are.” You blushed deeply at that, unsure of how in the world you had ended up here, but hearing him say the things you had always wanted him to say made your heart race so fast you were sure you were dreaming. 

“So what’s the first step?” you asked, trying to keep your voice calm as you wrapped your arm around his neck. He moved, so you were facing each other now, the blanket falling slightly. You unconsciously tangled his hair in your fingers. He closed his eyes, obviously enjoying whatever you were doing.

“Well you’re doing great so far,” he sighed, his tone breathless. “I was right, quick learner for sure.” you smirked, your fears long forgotten as you felt him lean into your touch. You had no idea that would have such an affect on him, you’d definitely remember that for later.

“What next?” you asked, and he opened his eyes. They were darker than before, and you were sure you were hallucinating. He wrapped both his arms around you, pulling you even closer. His face was inches from yours, if leaned forward you would bump noses. 

“Well I’ll pull you close, close enough to kiss you of course,” he whispered, and you chuckled. “Then I’ll probably compliment you some more, telling you how much I like being around you, how beautiful you are, how long I’ve wanted to do this.” he paused, smiling at you. “Then I’ll lean in closer, and ask if you’re sure you want this.”

“And I’ll say that I do,” you said, “That I’ve wanted this for a long time, I was just too scared to say anything, how dumb was that, huh?”

You both chuckled at that, agreeing that you both had been so scared for no reason. “That’s good to hear,” he grinned, playing with the hem of your shirt. “Cause that’d be really awkward if you didn’t feel the same.”

“Oh I feel the same,” you said quickly. “Don’t even worry about that.”

He smiled at you for the millionth time that night, and even though you should have been used to it by now, you still felt like you were floating. “Well now I’m gonna lean forward, probably a little too slowly just to tease you, and maybe I’ll pause just in front of you,” he whispered, pausing with almost no room between your lips.

“And then?” you asked quietly, afraid to break the moment. “What should I do?”

“Whatever you feel like.”

You leaned forward, closing the gap between the two of you. His lips were as soft as you had imagined they would have been. You weren’t sure what to do once you two had touched, but you felt him move away before kissing you again, this time with more pressure. You hesitantly did the same, and you felt his grip on your tighten, so you must have been doing something right. He pulled away again, and you opened your eyes to see him grinning at you. He leaned forward so his mouth was by your ear.

“You're doing great,” he said, chills running down your spine. “You’re a natural.”

He kissed your cheek, before reconnecting your lips, you moved slowly, testing the waters on what you thought might work, gauging the success rate by how Jin reacted. You weren’t sure how much time had passed before you pulled away again, but you could see that his lips were red, and you imagined yours looked the same. 

“You’re amazing,” you said, heart seizing at the way he looked at you, and it was in that moment that you knew things were going to be okay. “Definitely the best teacher I’ve ever had. I might need a few more lessons though.”

He smirked, “Oh don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time for more lessons. It’ll cost you though,”

“What’s the price?” you mused, fingers dancing around his face, tracing the outline of his jaw, his ear, his collarbone. 

“A date, with me, this weekend, at a restaurant of your choosing.”

You hummed, pretending to contemplate the idea, “I guess I can do that, but I charge too, ya know.”

“Oh yeah?” he taunted, curious what you were gonna say. “For what?”

You wanted to do something equally as romantic and sensual as him, but in that moment you were overcome with an urge to just hold onto him, to hug him. So you tightly wrapped yourself around him, stuffing your head into the crook of his neck. He returned your embrace immediately, slightly caught off guard by your change in tone, but welcomed it nevertheless. He ran his hands up and down you back as you took a deep breath. You turned your head towards him, tentatively placing a kiss on his neck. You felt him shiver slightly, the goosebumps rising on his skin. “For that,” you whispered, kissing his neck once more, before returning to your original embrace. 

He wasn’t sure what had just happened, but somehow you had managed to be adorable and extremely hot within the span of seconds, and it was in that moment he realized you would be the death of him. He held you for a while, enjoying your embrace, enjoying the way you fiddle with the hair on the nape of his neck every so often, enjoying the way he was finally holding you the way he had always wanted to.

You couldn’t have asked for anything better than this, you were so happy, you couldn’t believe your luck. Time passed, and with each minute, intoxicated by his scent, you felt yourself growing tired, wordlessly, you dozed off, the alcohol tiredness finally taking effect, and it wasn’t until Alexa knocked on the door, did Jin realize what had happened, and how much time had passed.

She quietly opened the door, “Glad to see my efforts didn’t go to waste,” Jin grinned at her, pulling the blanket over your sleeping form.

“Thank you,” he said sincerely. “Sorry I was so blind before, I owe you for what you did. If you hadn’t messaged me last week, I don’t think this ever would have happened.”

“No kidding, you both are scaredy cats, and we both know y/n never would have said anything, she liked you too much to risk it,” she said, and they chuckled. “Are you okay out here? It’s cold out here, things have calmed down inside, we’re watching a movie if you want to come back inside.”

“I’ll be in in a second,” he said. “Thank you again, Alexa, I owe you one.”

“Just put in a good word for me next time you and Jimin hang out, yeah?” she said shyly and Jin gasped. 

“Really?” he asked, an excited look on his face.

“I don’t know, maybe, he’s cool, he’s handsome, those aren’t bad things.” she explained, a blush on her face, Jin wiggled his eyebrows at her, and she sighed. “Okay I’m going, don’t make me regret asking for that. See you in a bit.”

She shut the sliding door, and Jin looked down at you again, still in awe of what had happened. You shifted in your sleep, in an attempt to get more comfortable, you snuggled closer, if that was even possible. “So Jimin and Alexa, huh?” you whispered, causing Jin to jump at the sound of your voice.

“You’re awake?” he asked.

“Kinda,” you mused, “I heard the door open. I’m glad she said something, cause you’re both right, I never would have said anything, liked you too much.”

He smiled, a deep blush on his face. He wondered how long it would take for your words to have a lesser effect, he secretly hoped it would never come. “Do you want to go watch the movie? Or do you want to sleep?”

You contemplated your choices, “Let’s go say goodbye, and you can come over?” you lifted your head to gauge his expression. “Unless you don’t want to, that’s fine too.”

“No, no, no,” he assured you. “I’d love to come over.”

You smiled, and kissed him again before standing up. Jin followed you inside, grabbing your hand the first chance he got. Your friends all watched as you came in, and Namjoon was the first to congratulate you both.

“It’s about time you did something, Jin!” Yoongi nagged, and Jin let out a shout of protest. You laughed, making eye contact with Alexa. Thank you you mouthed to her, and she smiled, so genuine and full of love. You’re welcome she mouthed back, a knowing look on her face. Next to her, Jimin sat, and you wiggled your eyebrows at her as Jin grabbed your jackets. She blushed, and you grew excited at the new prospect of their relationship. Jimin grabbed her attention as he asked her a question, and you watched as he rested a hand on her thigh, you had never seen her so bubbly and excited, you made a mental note to ask her about it later. Jin returned to your side, handing you your coat. You bid farewell to everyone, and made your way to your car. The drive home was filled with compliments, loud singing to the radio, and plenty of kisses from Jin as you drove. 

By the time you got to your apartment, you felt tired again, and you could tell Jin was finally falling victim to sleep as well. You grabbed some of his old sweats that you had stolen from your dresser, and handed them to him. You shamelessly watched as he undressed, slipping on the sweatpants, but opting out of the sweatshirt. This wasn’t the first time you had seen him shirtless, but it was certainly the first time you hadn’t looked away when he looked at you. Wordlessly, you smiled at him and stripped yourself of your shirt and bottoms. He felt his stare and you turned to take off your bra and put on an old t-shirt. You pulled on some shorts, and turned back to face him, he was laying on your bed, arms behind his head, his muscles on full display. You blushed at the sight, climbing into bed next to him, immediately leaning into his touch as he pulled you onto his chest. You felt it rise and fall with each breath he took, it was incredibly calming. 

“You’re beautiful,” he said, tilting your jaw up to kiss you. Your legs went weak at the feeling, and you laid your hand on his chest. “So so beautiful, I’m so lucky.”

“Says you, world wide handsome,” you joked, and he laughed. Things were gonna be just fine, you could feel it.

[refinedbuffoonery]

Quarantine Moments (14)

Soooooo this started as me vibing to a Halsey song and then it turned into angst. Oops. Sorry. 

Also, in case you missed the announcement earlier this week, this is the last QM. I’ve had so much fun writing these, but it’s time to move on to new things. :)

*****

It’s a quiet night in the MacGyver household. 

Mac lays on the couch, practicing the ukulele. Bozer and Riley are in their respective rooms, doing their own thing. As much as he loves them, Mac has to admit it’s nice having some alone time. 

His fingers land on the wrong strings, and the resulting chord grates on his ears. 

Progress is coming slowly, to say the least. 

Riley shuffles into the kitchen and fills a glass of water for herself. Using her presence as an excuse to pause his increasingly frustrating playing, Mac studies Riley’s posture. Her shoulders cave inward, and she shifts her weight back and forth, from one leg to the other. When Riley turns around, Mac notices the heavy expression in her eyes. 

Something is wrong. 

They hold eye contact for a few seconds, saying nothing. It’s almost as if Riley is trying to convey her thoughts without actually speaking. 

Mac wishes he could understand her. Usually he can. But this look...he can’t pinpoint what it means. 

“C’mon,” Riley beckons. “Let’s go for a drive.” 

Mac frowns, checking the time. “Now? It’s almost ten.” 

“Let’s go,” she repeats. Crossing the distance to the couch, Riley lowers her voice. “Bozer needs some space. I accidentally walked in on him while he was on the phone.” The heavy look in her eyes suddenly makes sense. 

“His mom?” 

“Mac—” Riley lowers her gaze. “She’s...she’s not doing well.” 

“Fuck,” he curses under his breath, sitting up. Bozer’s mom is the closest thing Mac has to a mother. She certainly raised him like he was her own. 

Riley squeezes his shoulder reassuringly. “I’ll drive. Does your truck have gas? Mine’s almost out.” 

Still thinking about Bozer’s mom, Mac almost doesn’t hear her. “Yeah,” he belatedly stutters. Closing his eyes and taking a few deep, steadying breaths, Mac pulls on a pair of sneakers and follows Riley out the door. 

It feels good to leave the house.

Riley winds her way through the city streets, turning periodically but generally heading west. Mac’s beach playlist plays softly through the speakers. The roads are empty, which still shocks Mac even after two months of lockdown. Even late at night, there’s usually people on the road. The eerie stillness of his city is unnerving. It’s usually pulsing with life, not...whatever this is. 

A ghost-town, perhaps. Haunted by the memory of the diverse, vibrant beings that once inhabited it. 

“Did you hear anything else?” he asks, referring to Bozer’s phone call. 

Regret flashes in Riley’s eyes. “No. I left as soon as I realized who he was talking to.” 

After a few more turns, they’re in a part of town Mac isn’t familiar with, and he can’t stop himself from asking, “Where are you taking me?” He knows the difference between Riley aimlessly driving and when she has a destination in mind, and this is definitely the latter. 

“My spot.” 

.

They end up at the beach. 

Riley rolls down her window partway, and the smell of saltwater and seaweed wafts in on the gentle breeze. The lights of a ship glimmer in the distance; it’s big, maybe a cargo ship or an aircraft carrier. 

There’s something soothing about being near the ocean, Mac thinks, like all his troubles will be washed out to sea with the receding tide. 

There’s a lot he’d like to wash away.

Mac exhales with each wave's retreat, letting his thoughts and emotions go with it, one by one. After a few minutes, Mac feels lighter than he has in days. "Thanks for getting me out of the house," he says. "I know it wasn't your intention, but I needed this."

"You're welcome." Riley glances at him and looks away, biting her lip. Something flickers in her eyes, just for a second, but it’s gone before Mac can figure out what it is. 

“So, I heard a good joke today,” Mac says. 

“Oh really? Where’d you hear it?” 

“On my run. The teenage boys on the corner were practicing their stand-up comedy routine in the front yard again.” 

Riley smiles. “Let’s hear it.” 

Mac takes a deep breath, mentally preparing himself so he doesn’t start laughing before he lands the punchline. “What did the fish say when it hit the wall?” 

Riley makes a show of thinking for a second. “I don’t know. What?” 

“Dam.” 

Riley tips her head back and laughs, the sound loud and full of life. Tendrils of warmth curl in Mac’s insides, taking up residence in the shadowed corners of his soul. He’s been thinking about that joke all day, waiting for the right moment to tell her. 

Because Riley is the first person he wanted to tell, not Bozer or Desi or anyone else. 

Just Riley. 

She’s still laughing as her gaze catches his, and her raw, unguarded expression sends a chill down Mac’s spine. 

Sometimes Mac lets himself think about what it could be like if that wall between them wasn’t there. 

She’d consume him, in every way possible. And he’d gladly let her. 

But that wall is there. It’s been there since the day they met, and Mac respects her too much to poke holes in it. Maybe it’s a good thing. With the wall there to block sparks and fireworks, they developed a quiet rhythm of love and care, and Mac wouldn’t trade that for the world. 

If he let himself love her, really love her, there would be no going back from that, no returning to the way things are now. Either they’d be it for each other—be the one—or they’d wreck each other too thoroughly to ever be just friends again. So even if the wall came down, in a future where Desi is out of the picture, Mac would think twice before crossing that line with Riley. 

And he knows she would too. 

But that wall is there, Mac reminds himself again, and he and Desi are trying to make their relationship work. And as for Riley...

Riley will always be the “what if” he never got the chance to answer. 

Mac can live with that. He doesn’t have a choice, really. 

*****

Riley didn’t think about where was going. She just let her hands and feet take her where she needed to go, and it’s only in the comfortable quiet after Mac tells his stupid joke that Riley realizes what she’s done. 

“I’ve never taken anyone here before,” she confesses suddenly. Riley found this lesser-known beach access point in high school, not long after getting her driver’s license. Her spot has always been a quiet place she could escape to when she needed to avoid the real world for a while. It has always been there for her—when Riley was mad or sad or frustrated, or when she just needed some alone time to think. 

Mac snaps his head up in surprise. “Really?” 

“Yeah.” Riley looks away. She wants to tell him, but she can’t bring herself to do it while he’s looking at her like that. “Though, I almost took Aubrey here once.” 

“What stopped you?” 

“I chickened-out at the last minute. I thought I was ready to share it with him, but there was this little voice in my head telling me to keep this place to myself. So I kept driving. I parked in the lot a couple miles south and said that was my spot.” Riley avoids thinking about what it might mean that she didn’t think twice about bringing Mac.

There’s a long pause, and then Mac says, “Thank you for sharing this with me. You didn’t have to. And for the record, even if you had told me about your spot, I never would’ve asked you to bring me here if you didn’t want to.” 

It takes a couple tries to swallow the lump in her throat. “I think Aubrey knew I was lying,” Riley deflects. “So I made out with him long enough for him to forget, and he never brought it up later.” She picks at her nails. The dark gray polish is chipping; she’ll have to repaint them soon. “That was the only thing I ever lied to him about. Besides work stuff, of course. And we know how that turned out.” 

The stench of seaweed and decay fills her nostrils. Riley focuses on it—anything to distract her from the scent of Mac’s laundry detergent. It’s plagued her ever since moving in with him after breaking up with Aubrey. The scent she’s long associated with safety and her friend—and now the person she has unrequited feelings for—follows her everywhere, since her clothes smell like it too. Most days Riley can ignore it, but sometimes....sometimes it feels like torture. 

And right now, at her special spot, in his truck, wearing clothes that smell like him, it all feels like a mockery of what Riley wants and can never have. 

Once, just this once, she lets herself imagine it anyway. 

They’re on another drive, just like this one. It starts with stolen glances, then she switches to driving with one hand so the other can rest innocently on the center console, and soon enough, Mac’s fingers slip between hers. 

Then they’re parked at Riley’s spot, and his lips are on her neck, trailing light kisses across her throat. They get a little carried away, marking skin and untucking shirts, and a murmured Let’s get out of here has Riley speeding home so they can continue this in private. 

Riley shivers. Taking a deep breath, she tucks the fantasy into the far corner of her mind for safe keeping. Riley knows she should just let it go. There’s only so long she can sit in the silence, waiting for a sign and wondering if kissing him would really ruin everything they already have. 

Riley finally dares to glance at Mac again. He’s already looking at her, still wearing that soft expression from before. It’s enough to make her wonder, what if? 

What if he’s everything she ever wanted? 

But what if she loses everything instead? 

[renegadewangs]

Van Zieks - the Examination, part 4

Warnings: SPOILERS for The Great Ace Attorney: Chronicles. Additional warning for racist sentiments uttered by fictional characters (and screencaps to show these sentiments).

Disclaimer: (see  Part 1 for the more detailed disclaimer.) - These posts are not meant to be taken as fact. Everything I’m outlining stems from my own views and experiences. If you believe that I’ve missed or misinterpreted something, please let me know so I can edit the post accordingly. -The purpose of these posts is an analysis, nothing more. Please do not come into these posts expecting me to either defend Barok van Zieks from haters, nor expecting me to encourage the hatred. - I’m using the Western release of The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles for these posts, but may refer to the original Japanese dialogue of Dai Gyakuten Saiban if needed to compare what’s said. This also means I’m using the localized names and localized romanization of the names to stay consistent. -It doesn’t matter one bit to me whether you like Barok van Zieks or dislike him. However, I will ask that everyone who comments refrains from attacking real, actual people.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

It’s time to take a close look at Episode 2 of the second game, The Memoirs of the Clouded Kokoro!

Episode 2-2: The Memoirs of the Clouded Kokoro

Remember how in the last episode we vaguely got Barok on our side near the end of the trial by proving Mrs. Garrideb was actually involved in the crime? … Yeah. Forget that progress. It's being undone. Case 2-2 is the first case of the second game which features Barok, which unfortunately means he needs to be 'reintroduced' to the audience and it takes him back several steps in his growth. It makes sense, I suppose, it would've been weird starting a new game with him already being lightly on Ryu's side. Even so, it's a bit insulting how this case acts as if the chronologically previous one accomplished nothing.

So anyway, this case flashbacks to something which supposedly happened right after the first game's fourth case. The day after Soseki's acquittal, even. Turns out, Soseki awoke to find one of the other tenants in his building dead and asked Ryu for help, but (S)Holmes tagged along. Gregson is at the crime scene, keeping an eye on the place and on Soseki in particular since he's suspicious. (Sure, Gregson. Sure. Has nothing to do with the Reaper's curse, probably.) After some investigation with (S)Holmes, Gregson has enough evidence to actually arrest Soseki, which definitely feels like a step backwards. A bit later, it turns out the victim is Not Actually Dead Yet. Again! The Great Ace Attorney really enjoys throwing us for a loop by pretending we're in for another murder case.

Anyway, during the course of the investigation, I found two mentions of Van Zieks. The first is when you investigate the broken glasses and bottles in the victim's room. Susato is immediately reminded of Lord van Zieks.

And when examining Garrideb's old army uniform, Susato points out it might suit Lord van Zieks.

Haha, as if his usual outfit isn't ostentatious enough already. So we learn that Susato doesn't have a very high opinion of him at all, and I should hope it's not still related to that time he called detective novels pathetic. It's fun of them to refer to him in an investigation that he's not involved in in any way, especially when they don't know yet that he's the prosecution again.

Speaking to Soseki in the gaol, we're once again told that he's had a dreadful time in England so far. He sees foreigners everywhere and he's sure they're all laughing at him. He's been so on edge the past year that he's moved 'more times than he can remember'. So once again, we're reminded that racial prejudice in 1900s England is a focal point of this game's story. Once the conversation is over, Gregson appears to let the gang know that the victim has regained consciousness and is accusing Soseki of poisoning him. We're going to trial for an attempted murder charge, y'all!

The next day, in the defendant's lobby, Susato comes bursting in with the dreadful news that Barok van Zieks has once again taken on the prosecution. It's definitely safe to assume now that either Ryu or Soseki is the reason he's taking on these not-really-murder trials when he normally wouldn't. As I mentioned before, this is his reintroduction in the second game and so the game feels compelled to remind the player of what went down in case 1-4:

He sure did! The game also once again reminds us what the Reaper's Curse entails, and that perhaps that's the reason why Soseki is on trial yet again. He's doomed, perhaps. Susato also informs us that (S)Holmes is running late, just as he was two days ago, and Ryu thinks that's a good thing because if the Great Detective were there, Ryu might come to rely on his help.

… I suppose? He already relies on Susato for help and I feel like that would warrant far more 'preying' from Van Zieks than relying on a male, adult British detective for help. Though knowing (S)Holmes, he'd end up stealing the show and taking the words from Ryu's mouth, but that doesn't seem to be what Ryu's worried about here. I suppose the main point to take away from this remark is that Ryu wants to do as much as he can by himself. He wants to appear strong in front of Van Zieks to avoid presenting an easy target, and I think this might actually be the first time we see a sentiment like that from him. Is he afraid of Van Zieks? Does he actually care about the man's opinion? Anyway, he swears to show Van Zieks what a Japanese lawyer can do.

Inside the courtroom, Van Zieks does the usual prosecutor spiel about how the defense needs to be ready for defeat. Ryu thinks to himself that Van Zieks has a particular animosity towards Japanese people for some reason.

Good thing we got a second game in the series, eh? So because the defendant was on trial only two days ago, the same jurors were chosen where possible. The only juror not returning is Mrs. Garrideb, who's too busy being in prison. Her spot is now taken by a very fancy lady we later learn to be the wife of the Altamont Gas Company's owner. She may as well be the CEO herself with how she's acting, though. Anyway, Van Zieks addresses the jurors directly.

“However, the innocent verdict afforded to this eccentric Nipponese before... has had dire consequences. Did the accused repent for his wrongdoing in that affair? Far from it. Instead, he used his freedom to perpetrate a most blood-curdling crime!”

Van Zieks makes record time by taking off his cloak immediately after this line. He's gone straight into overdrive. The witnesses summoned this time are Inspector Gregson and... Soseki? It's very irregular for the defendant to be testifying, especially this early in the trial and especially by the prosecution's request. I can't really make much of it. It feels like the only reason Soseki is testifying is for this joke:

Also found when examining the testimony is a remark from Van Zieks that I honestly found shocking in how ferocious and scummy it is.

Unnecessary, that remark. It didn't need to exist at all in my opinion. So after Ryu shatters the testimony and scatters Gregson's fish 'n chips, Van Zieks calmly pours himself a glass of wine. I have to be honest, by now whenever he does this I'm left wondering what he'll do next. Will he crush the chalice? Will he throw it? Will he actually take a sip? The versatility of the action and unpredictable nature of Van Zieks add a bit of suspense. Turns out, his mind wandered during the testimony.

And then he ends up crushing the glass in his hand anyway. Alas, poor chalice. We knew it. So after a bit of debating back and forth about whether Shamspeare drank the supposedly-poisoned-tea after Soseki left the room, Van Zieks suddenly falls silent. We get three different, consecutive frames of him going “......” and when the judge asks what's wrong, he says this:

Supersonic hearing, this one. That is, unless the carriage entered the courthouse and literally pulled up in the hallway outside the room? Haven't we learned our lesson from the last time a carriage was driven into the Old Bailey?! So Shamspeare was apparently subpoenaed by the prosecution and has shown up to testify (with his doctor's permission). Bad news for us, since he's the one accusing Soseki in the first place. There's also a second witness to support Shamspeare's insistence there were no other visitors to the room and therefore only Soseki could have poisoned him. After that testimony is over, Van Zieks gets his wish and all the jurors vote guilty.

Van Zieks really seems to think that Soseki is a terrible person deserving of justice, huh? He was right there during the previous trial, saw Ryu prove without a shadow of a doubt that Soseki was innocent and still insists that justice will be done “this time”. Calm the heck down man, you're the one who sided with us when Mrs. Garrideb needed to testify, remember? And here comes another example of the game pretending the previous trials didn't leave an impact; when the Summation Examination is brought up, it's with disdain and this remark:

Bro, we used the Summation Examination successfully like five times already. Sit your butt down and watch the show. The jurors once again give prejudiced reasons for their decisions:

And unfortunately, instead of changing their minds by proving Soseki is a morally upstanding, innocent citizen, Ryu instead gets through this Summation Examination by basically proving Shamspeare is a worse person than Soseki. That's... not the direction you should be taking here, narrative. After convincing four of the jurors that Shamspeare is a fishy liar, Van Zieks flings another chalice of wine in frustration. The judge still thinks he could technically pass a ruling on the trial, since the new information didn't exactly disprove that Soseki is the culprit, but the jurors have been influenced so thoroughly that they can't let this new info go ignored. Testimony from the Altamont Company is allowed! Van Zieks thinks it's a waste of time, of course, and if this were reality it would be. Since it's an Ace Attorney game, we know Shamspeare's gas thievery is bound to somehow be related to the incident. Van Zieks flings yet another chalice after hearing the testimony (how many has it been already? Five?) and very shortly after, he tosses the entire bottle over his shoulder. Susato points out that he seems to be in a violent mood. I feel like someone must've pissed in his oatmeal that morning, because I've got no real explanation for why his character regressed this badly in the course of what chronologically was only two days.

Van Zieks flings two more chalices as the testimony progresses to prove that Shamspeare made fake coins to fool the gas meter. At the end of it all, he supposedly 'throws his hand up in despair and happened to catch his hallowed bottle along the way', flinging yet another one of those into the gallery. I'm starting to feel very bad for the people seated behind him now. Is the game overdoing these quirky animations to compensate for his regressed attitude? Because I'm not sure it's working... Van Zieks continues to insist that the situation hasn't changed and only Soseki could have poisoned the victim, so he calls for immediate adjucation. The game gives Ryu the option to either object or wait and see, and I have to be honest, this gave me pause. After what happened with the penalties in case 1-4, I was sure Van Zieks might dish out more punishment for waiting and seeing. Turns out, he doesn't. Ryu points out that Shamspeare likely used the tea to make these fake frozen coins of his, meaning there's still tea left at the scene of the crime which can be tested for poison.

Head in my hands right now. Again, I get it, they basically had to reintroduce Van Zieks to newcomers of the game (however few there might've been) so they had to regress him a bit, but I really don't like this. He honestly felt like he'd grown at the end of 1-4 and the game's not only undone it, it feels like they've made him even more of a scumbag. This line and this gesture honestly doesn’t quite correspond with the character established in the previous game. Anyway, court adjourned till the next day so the police can test the tea for poison.

During the investigation segment, we get a conversation that I'd quite honestly forgotten even exists. Turns out, (S)Holmes and Van Zieks are acquainted! ...or are they? (S)Holmes says he 'must pass the time of day with Mr. Reaper again, as it's been too long' and when asked whether they're acquainted, (S)Holmes replies that there isn't a person in the world who doesn't know his name, expertly dodging the question. Naturally, a new conversation topic opens up about it, so we can still attempt to needle more details out of him.

He explains the history of the Reaper's curse a bit more. Previous defendants found not-guilty would 'disappear from the capital' by falling under a passing carriage, drowning in the Thames, succumbing to a sudden fever... Etc. Susato points out that if those rumors are true, then surely the obvious conclusion would be that they were killed by Van Zieks's own hand. (S)Holmes points out that's impossible, since Van Zieks was already investigated on the matter before and for every single incident, he had a solid alibi. (This... doesn't disprove Van Zieks had anything to do with it, but okay (S)Holmes. Sure.) (S)Holmes also rubs it in yet again that Van Zieks retired from the courts five years ago and didn't return until the day Naruhodo arrived. I honestly don't know why they keep bringing that 5 year hiatus up in every single case, because as far as I can recall it was never fully explained or relevant.

I love how “foul smell” is wedged in-between those two topics as if it's also related. Anyway the conversation continues when Ryu brings up that Van Zieks seems to have a particular disdain for Japanese people. Susato demands to know whether (S)Holmes knows a bit more about it and while he's silent at first, he relents and tells us a tale (which will apparently be forgotten by Ryu and Susato in case 1-5). Van Zieks “chose to enter the legal profession ten years ago, but before that time, the man's closest companion hailed from the empire of Japan”. Which is a wording that baffles me, because it implies that Van Zieks chose to enter the legal profession at the same moment that Japanese person betrayed him, which we know is not the case. He was already in training to be a prosecutor before that, otherwise how could he possibly have prosecuted the Professor trial? Ryu is shocked and asks to know more, but (S)Holmes says the veil on the events from the past will be lifted soon enough. I'll get back to the implications of what this means for Van Zieks's backstory when we hit this exact same reveal in case 1-5.

Van Zieks is mentioned very little in the rest of the investigation segments. We only learn that he tasked Gregson with finding new clues, much to Gregson's dismay, as there isn't much to be found. The Inspector does immediately leap at new information when we uncover it, which implies he's eager to either please Van Zieks or avoid being scolded by him. I'm assuming the latter, but it's also possible Gregson feels guilty over the whole Reaper thing and Klint's autopsy, and is now compensating by working his hardest to fulfill Van Zieks's requests.

At the very end of the investigation, when evening falls, (S)Holmes reminds us that “it'll be hard to escape the grip of our friend, Mr. Reaper”. The next day, in the defendant's lobby just before the trial begins, Ryu thinks to himself that he doesn't believe in the legend of the Reaper any more than he believes in the convict's curse Soseki keeps mentioning. What's interesting here is that Ryu isn't dreading the confrontation anymore. After the McGilded trial he seemed genuinely intimidated by the concept of going up against Van Zieks (not because of the racism but because of what happened to his first defendant), but now he's not so hesitant anymore. He's beginning to see that Van Zieks can be defeated, that the Reaper thing is nonsense and that protecting his client is a fight worth fighting.

Into the courtroom we go for day 2 of the trial! When the judge asks about the results of the tea test, Van Zieks is silent for a moment. He pours himself a glass of wine, asking for a moment to “savour a liquid of a more sanguine hue”, then refers to Gregson for the full report. Gregson confirms no poison was found in the tea remains, but the prosecution wouldn't be the prosecution (and the game would be pretty boring) if they didn't have a backup plan. When Ryu proclaims Soseki is innocent, Van Zieks accuses him of jumping to conclusions, “a typical Nipponese reaction”. It's also a typical prosecution reaction to be hypocritical, no surprises here. He throws his chalice (first one of the day) and summons Shamspeare back to the stand to testify about how Soseki's unpoisoned and undrank cup of tea had been used to make the ice coins.

There's some lines here that I thought I might as well include:

“Yet on occasion, tedium distracts me and I pour more times than I intended until the bottle is dry.”

You know, it occurs to me that this drink is pretty much confirmed to be wine. He's very extra when talking about it himself, but he had his silly little wine analogies in the previous case and Susato referred to his glasses as “wine glasses”. And you would think it's obvious that it's wine, but we know Ace Attorney's long history with 'grape juice'. Either way, this dialogue leaves a pretty harsh implication that Van Zieks drinks alcohol simply to distract himself from troublesome moods. Sure, he says “tedium”, but this is a stoic prosecutor in the year 1900. They referred to depression as “melancholia” back then, and since he doesn't appear to have any friends, I expect he experiences “tedium” quite often outside the courtroom. He apparently set a rule for himself not to fill his glass more than seven times during a trial which, in turn, implies he's aware any more would cause problems. All of this is moot, of course, since 80% of the wine he pours for himself ends up on the floor between shards of glass. Still, though... Zieks, are you okay?

I don't think he is, because he pulls a very dirty trick here. Ryu proves Soseki drank all his tea and therefore it couldn't possibly have been used, so Van Zieks insinuates to Shamspeare that perhaps he misremembered using the tea from Soseki's cup and instead used tea still left in the teapot. An excuse Shamspeare happily takes, of course. Not gonna lie, I got angry, not because it's a dirty trick but because it's inconsistent. This is the very same character who all but dragged Mrs. Garrideb down from the juror bench to testify when it became clear she likely threw a knife out the window. And now he's feeding slippery excuses to a man who's very clearly lying about all sorts of things? What??? And remember this incident, because I'm going to be referring back to it later.

He crushes another chalice, removes his cloak and continues to insist that we should believe this thieving liar at the witness stand. The jurors for some reason buy the baloney served to them on a tinfoil platter and even twist Ryu's sentiments around, with some bloke going as far as to interpret the situation as 'the lawyer lad believes anyone who steals gas deserves to be poisoned'. Summation Examination gets very funky this time around, with the outcome being that Shamspeare probably blew the gas pipes (s-snerk) and the poison was laced on the pipe.

Van Zieks pours himself a glass of wine and pretty much immediately flings it, saying these are all empty assertions without a shred of proof. When Ryu presents the picture with the skin prints, Van Zieks once again breaks the rule of the prosecution staying silent during Summation Examination to point out that skin prints cannot be used as evidence, since that method is not recognized by the court (yet). Aaand he crushes yet another chalice in his hand.

Susato claims it was never meant to be used as official evidence, it was only a tool to demonstrate a new possibility to the jury. Jumping through some loopholes here, we are, since the picture is clearly in our Court Record as evidence. But, well, the prosecution cheats too so what's the harm? Some jurors vote not-guilty, but there's still one more that needs convincing on order to keep the trial going. Ryu says he has a witness who's already testified that the pipe-blowing incident did indeed occur that night, as Soseki stated the other day before the court that his stove went out in the dead of night. (Hang on, is this why the narrative made him testify alongside Gregson?) With that the majority of the jury votes not-guilty and the trial has to continue, but Van Zieks is extra rattled now. (Another bottle goes soaring.)

He once again reminds the court that skin prints aren't admissible evidence and therefore, there is no real proof Shamspeare put his mouth to the pipes (ghghhh I'm sorry this is such a silly thing to have to type out). Ryu asks for an investigative team to test the mouth of the gas pipe for poison, but since it would've evaporated by now, that's a no-go. Also, Van Zieks says that “what appears to be simple is my Nipponese friend's mind” and that's a scumbag point. Ryu attempts to turn the trial around by claiming that Shamspeare attempted to kill Soseki, making the defendant the victim, but Van Zieks ain't having it. The aggrieved being the accused is an interesting notion, but doesn't change what actually happened. In fact, if anything, it establishes a motive for Soseki to lay a trap for Shamspeare. Because who else could have known about the gas pipe trickery and put the poison there, right? Why, the true culprit, of course.

Our man Van Zieks really doesn't like (S)Holmes, huh? A tidbit which the games will never bother to explain! Either way, Ryu raises the name of Olive Green, the victim of the previous case. And I gotta say, I do genuinely like the way they integrated these two Clouded Kokoro cases together. The chronology of everything that went down is very fun to decipher, but long story short, Olive Green was at Briar Road the day she was stabbed for a reason and knows more about the 'convict curse' Soseki and Garrideb kept mentioning, so let's drag her into court! Van Zieks agrees to subpoena Miss Green in order to 'see his Nipponese friend's farce through to its conclusion'.

So during intermission some more evidence is handed to Ryu and when trial resumes, Van Zieks continues to be his usual self.

“The prosecution has tried to extend every courtesy to this amateur newcomer from dubious Eastern shores.”

Ryu sweats bullets as he meekly thanks Van Zieks “(for his backhanded consideration)”, but once again the judge is the one to call Van Zieks out on his attitude.

Amazing. It's so refreshing to see a judge who actually disagrees with the prosecution's haughty attitude problems and acknowledges it has no place in a courtroom. Nothing against Udgey, because we all love Udgey (and his Canadian brother), but this man actually grows and learns. So Olive Green takes the stand alongside Shamspeare (maybe not the best idea since Ryu just accused her of trying to murder this man) for dual testimony. When Green brings up what a dreadful ordeal the knife to her back was, Van Zieks says this:

Hang on, empathy? He's giving her advice? This reeks of humanization! Green seems taken aback and thanks him for his words, so the sentiment was genuinely accepted. This in itself is a very nice scene to see in action, similar to Van Zieks allowing Roly Beate to keep his job. Unfortunately, Van Zieks's character is in a wild rollercoaster of moral inconsistency during this particular case which sours the experience somewhat. Case in point:

YOOOU hypocrite! This actively angered me, because at the very start of this same trial day he was personally feeding lies to Shamspeare. Now he's warning Green not to lie? It gets even worse a bit later on when Green gets cornered about stealing the note, she asks him whether it could all be some sort of misunderstanding, and he says:

ACTIVELY FEEDING SHAMSPEARE A LIE. THE VERY SAME DAY. I'm all for prosecutors using dirty tactics. It helps to juxtapose them further to the honest defense attorney we play as. However, it needs to be consistent. Either a prosecutor condones a witness's lies to help their case, or they feel that they're above it. The third, most used option is for them to start off condoning it, only to learn that truth takes priority over victory. This sloppy back-and-forth morality that Van Zieks has going on here is insanely frustrating, so it's no wonder some players end up disliking him. It honestly feels as if they rewrote this case so many times, they screwed up the exact growth trajectory Van Zieks has.

Anyway, it seems Van Zieks is suddenly fully on our side now to help Ryu prove that Green was in Shamspeare's room and laced the gas pipe with poison. And I mean help help. When the judge points out that if Green had laced the pipe the very same day she was stabbed, the attempted murder would have happened six days ago. Van Zieks is the one to say “Perhaps not, My Lord” and explain Briar Road was full of police at that time. At this point, Van Zieks and Ryu (and also Susato) actively start to take turns to explain the proper chronology of events. So the defense and the prosecution are in perfect sync right now, working together to explain the whodunnit. This is the ideal outcome to any trial, usually not seen until the last case of the game, so it's curious that this dynamic abruptly shows itself in a case like this. Van Zieks does still have one moment of gaslighting when he claims Ryu may have inhaled some dubious gas, causing his judgment to be clouded, since there's no motive behind Shamspeare's attempts on his fellow lodgers. A matter that's very easily resolved, of course. Once the name of Selden is brought up, Van Zieks continues our little game of back-and-forth-truth-reveal until (S)Holmes shows his face.

“Your usual haunts are the filthy backstreets of the capital, are they not?”

To which (S)Holmes replies that it's been too long, and Van Zieks's complexion has worsened since last they met. Alright, so Van Zieks and (S)Holmes definitely have met in person before, some undetermined amount of time ago. You'd think that going by (S)Holmes's friendly attitude they might've even been friends once, but our great detective is like that towards everyone. This is evidenced by an earlier encounter with Gregson where (S)Holmes insists they're friends and Gregson says that they're not friends, to which (S)Holmes quietly agrees. So really, this little exchange tells us nothing about the history between the great detective and the Reaper.

Some shenaniganry, a breakdown and admittance to guilt later, the court is finally ready to deem Soseki innocent. Van Zieks once again has some interesting lines here:

“And one I certainly didn't envisage walking... with you.”

Considering he attempted to trip us up for most of this walk up until the very last stretch, I don't like this remark very much. It feels very unearned. This is another one of those things that would've been more suitable in the last case of the game, but instead it's being crammed into a messy mid-game moment with the pretense that Van Zieks learned a lesson about being our ally.

In the defendant's lobby, the game basically gives the exact same dialogue as at the end of the original Clouded Kokoro case; that Soseki is returning to Japan and hopes to pen his own literature there, with the rest of the cast pointing out that the Reaper's Curse must factor into his decision to some degree. So we're still holding onto that question of whether Soseki will escape an untimely death or not. Anyone who's already played the last case of the first game will know the answer, of course.

So to summarize... I genuinely didn't enjoy Van Zieks's portrayal in this case. It really feels as if something went horribly wrong and they got some notes mixed up about where his character was already headed in the previous game. It's a crying shame. There was a lot of potential for a case set between 1-4 and 1-5, but they really dropped the ball when it comes to consistency and I've no doubt that it reflected badly on people's opinions of him. Though I think when we return to the first game for The Unspeakable Story, everything will right itself out again to some degree. Stay tuned!

[sunnywritesstuff34]

Illusions

(Yayyyy. Another one. It’s been a while, sorry. just wanna preface this by saying that like... I usually don’t really give a shit about Obito, but I figured this was a natural progression of the story and I kinda wanted to try and dive into Obito’s psyche a little so. here we go. tell me what you think. @ghostjellyfishheart here’s the next chapter lol. pls mind the tw’s)

TW and CW for: MAJOR UNREALITY, seriously stay safe, Obito is kinda spiraling a lot, grieving, struggling with morality, drinking, alcohol, less then stellar coping mechanisms of all kinds, don’t do this kids, child death, ghost child, dead kid, you don’t like... see her die but Rin is very much not alive, references to suicide, implied suicide, the uchiha massacre is its own warning, murder, its bad. its just. its just bad. did I mention unreality? a lot of that, death of a family member, obito is having a hard time with feelings, probably dis@ssociation, pretentious symbolism, scratch that, definitely dis@ssociation

Obito Uchiha is upset. 

And that is, frankly, ridiculous. Obito does not get upset. What does upset even mean? Is he sad? Mourning, perhaps? Or is he just worried? Either way, its borderline impossible. He shouldn’t be feeling anything. Obito doesn’t feel anything. Sure, he plays at it, when he’s Tobi. He feigns and pretends, he’s good at that. That is what he is, that is all he is. To Itachi, he is Madara. To Konan and Nagito, he is Obito. To everyone else, he is Tobi. Obito has taken on mask after mask after mask on in his life, both figuratively and literally. Sometimes he doesn't know where Obito ends and another begins. Obito does not feel anything, not for anyone that isn't Rin. Never for anyone that isn't Rin, and he left her behind a long time ago. And yet this boy, this child, has him reeling somehow. Has him… well, like before, the only word he can use is upset. He is rattled. And it has been so long, so long since he’s felt anything at all, that he doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know how to fix it. He kept seeing Sasuke in his head, kept remembering memories from years ago when he thought about the kid being gone forever. He remembered the first few years Itachi brought Sasuke to the compound, he remembered spontaneously discovering his obsession with tomatoes by accident with Kisame (who would not stop laughing. He had just never seen anybody. Put an entire tomato in their mouth. And Sasuke did it like it was the most natural thing in the world! Kisame wouldn't shut up about it for at least a week). He remembered helping the boy train with his newly forged chokuto, he remembered the grim determination towards his family and how much it reminded Obito of himself, he remembered all of it. And none of that should have mattered, because it wasn't real. None of it was real, the next world would be. The next world with Rin and Kakashi and Minato-sensei still alive, a world without… without Sasuke. Or any of the other Akatsuki. And that was what he wanted. He was sure that was what he wanted. Only in his room could he show the weakness tightly coiled in his stomach. But there was a knock on his door and it made him straighten up, instantly putting the mask that he just took off back on his face. He walked to the door and opened it, only to find the older Uchiha brother staring back at him. Obito blinked. 

“Itachi-san. What are you… what are you doing here? I- uh… come in.” Obito and Itachi sat down at the small table in Obito’s room and stared at each other awkwardly. “So… how can I help you?” Obito tried to ask, unsure of whether to say it like Tobi or just let his guard down and talk like himself (whoever that was). Itachi cleared his throat. 

“You are the only person in this godforsaken place that has sake that's worth a damn,” Itachi explained calmly. He looked away. “It has… been a long week.” Obito could tell the truth in that statement just from his cousin’s voice. Itachi sounded exhausted, and the perpetual mask of indifference had begun to slip when his little brother went missing. The two of them looked at each other and came to an understanding. For the next few minutes, there was no talking. Obito grabbed some glasses and poured his strongest sake out for the both of them, and they drank in silence. They only actually picked up a conversation once they were both drunk enough for the awkwardness to melt away. 

“He’s likely not dead,” Obito commented bluntly. Itachi only sighed. 

“If he is, I have no idea what I'd do,” Itachi grumbled casually, like it was an ordinary thing to say. “Certainly wouldn't stick around here. Probably follow in Shisui’s footsteps.” Obito only nodded, knowing better than to pry on that particular bit of insight into Itachi’s life. They were silent for a few more minutes before Obito spoke again. 

“The massacre,” Obito started. “I was long gone by the time it happened. What… are you and Sasuke really the only survivors as the rumors say?” Itachi nodded, throwing back another glass. Obito thought about that bitterly, about his grandmother who wouldn't have been spared. Itachi sighed. 

“Right. I've never really talked about this with anyone, and Sasuke and I don't speak about it much. You know how sharingan awakening works, yes?” Obito nodded, mind involuntarily flashing to his own experience. 

“Well I made some genuine friends on my genin team. It was the first time I ever had any friends.” Obito closed his eyes and took another sip. Friends, sharingan awakening. Being crushed under a boulder with your crying teammates looming over you. Thinking, no, don't cry, it doesn't hurt. It really doesn't hurt. I can't feel anything, please don't cry. Watching a particular white haired individual (a traitor, that traitor) desperately try to save you. Losing a part of yourself, a part of yourself you didn't even know you had, and giving it to someone else. Forever living with that, knowing that your other eye is somewhere, because you can still feel it, but not knowing much else. The aching absence that grows from that. He opened his eyes again. “I watched them die, right in front of my eyes. That awakened my Sharingan, and when I went home, my father congratulated me. He congratulated me. It was a nightmare and he was proud. I don't know, that always stuck with me. But anyway,” Itachi paused to drink more sake as the room spun. “Sasuke’s eyes woke during the massacre. I didn't get there in time. He watched our parents die, managed to hide in the closet and keep quiet the whole time so they didn't find him. I got there in time to stop them from killing him, and realized his sharingan had awakened because of everything. I wasn't able to save anyone, but I was able to save him, and that's all that matters.”

“I understand,” Obito replied evenly. “I know what it's like to be too late.”

Itachi’s eyes slid over to him. “Yeah well… whatever. The Uchiha had been planning a coup for a while. Danzo, he gave me a choice. Either kill everyone myself and have Sasuke be spared to live happily in the village. Or, to let them kill everyone, Sasuke included. I didn't… I refused either option and tried to get there but I was too late. They killed everyone in one night, a bunch of Anbu who were deployed for the massacre. Like I said, Sasuke managed to hide. I knew that Danzo would be after us, so I grabbed Sasuke and we got the hell out of dodge. He didn't speak for months afterwards. Not a single word, other than screaming during his nightmares. It was probably a little selfish, but I… I missed him. There was no more ‘Itachi, look at the score I got at the academy!’ or ‘Itachi look, look I learned a new move!’ There was just… nothing. He was so vacant. If he's dead- if he’s dead after everything we’ve been through, I don't- I have no idea what I'll do. We have to find him, and we have to kill the people who took him away from us. We have to.” I know, he wanted to shout. I know, I feel the same way, but I don't know why! Itachi left not long after that, stumbled back to his room, and Obito fell asleep in his armchair. That night he had a dream, a dream of Rin. it had been years since he dreamed of her, usually they were memories and bits and pieces, but this was different. He opened his eyes in his dream to a dark plane filled with ink, darkness stretching in every direction. It was a frequent setting he found himself in, usually the dream would be about him sinking into the oily substance until he couldn't breath. But this time it was low enough to wade in, his feet touching the ground, whatever that was. In the middle of the expanse, there was a bone white skeleton of some creature he didn't recognize, and Rin. He staggered towards her, and she hugged him without a word. In dreams like this he was always covered in blood, the Obito from years past. But now he was just him, and he was maskless.

“Just what have you gotten yourself into now, Obito?” she asked, and it sounded just like her. It wasn't her, he was fairly sure of that, he was dreaming for god’s sake, but it sounded like her. It seemed like her, and that was enough. “It's okay to be worried about the kid,” she said, running fingers through his hair while he tried to calm his breathing. 

“It's not real,” he managed hoarsely. “None of it. Nothing in this world is real, I shouldn't feel anything. So why… Why do I…”

“Does it matter if it's real?” she asked. “It feels real. Maybe it is, Obito.”

“Obito is dead,” he whispered. “At least the one you knew- Obito doesn't exist anymore.” Rin only shook her head, looking past him at nothing at all and smiling sadly.

“I don't believe you,” she said evenly. “You're still Obito. No matter how many names you take or how many masks you wear, I know who you are. And I think you do too.”

“It's not real,” he tried again, weakly. 

“If it's not real, then why do you help Konan with the dishes? If it's not real, then why do you want to save Itachi’s brother so badly? Why do you make plans for Nagato’s dream in the supposed next world when you don't have to? Why do you stick around Deidara to make sure he doesn't get killed? Why do you help Sasori with his puppets? Why, Obito?”

“I can't be Obito,” he muttered quietly. “He’s dead. He died with you.”

“He is right here. He is sitting here with me. You're still you. You'll always be you.”

“B-But…. But Madara-”

“Madara is dead,” she said with finality, shaking her head. “Madara is a dead man now. You are the only thing that can bring him back, and you have a choice.”

“I've never had a choice.”

“You do now. Madara isn't here.”

“This is all just an illusion.” She smiled sadly. 

“I'm an illusion, Obito. Your world is not.”

His dream didn't fade out from there. One second he was sitting in a dark dreamscape with his dead friend, and the next he was in the Akatsuki lair, laying in an armchair, sitting up and gasping for breath. His back hurt and his neck was aching from the weird position he dozed off in, and Obito could already feel the nausea of an inevitable hangover coming on. Still, he sat up properly, stretching his neck and running a hand through his short hair. Itachi was probably passed out in his room or throwing up already, and Obito had a hunch that he’d be feeling the same way pretty soon. He looked down at the floor and forced his eyes to focus. He didn't have time for a drunken hallucination within a drunken hallucination. But when he turned his head, he felt himself recoil and raise his hands to his face. The orange plastic from the ground winked back at him. Obito had taken his mask off. And now it was cracked. 

[ephyla]

Midsummer Relaxation

Midsummer was approaching and the people of New Berk have been scrambling all over, preparing for the celebration. The sun barely sets anymore, and everyone was absolutely exhausted. Hiccup was supposed to overview the entire preparation of the feast but all he desired was a break. Thank the Gods for marrying such a wonderful woman.

oOo

Midsummer was approaching and the people of New Berk have been scrambling all over the village for days, preparing for the celebration. The sun barely set anymore, and everyone was absolutely exhausted, prone to often make mistakes that drove the Chief of New Berk wild. Hiccup was supposed to overview the entire preparation of the feast, but also had to settle petty quarrels between sleep-deprived Vikings; avoiding sharp flying objects on the occasion. It was the perfect recipe for chaos and he was worried that they will not be ready on time. If one thing went according to plan, three more things would set them back again. Food went missing, tables were broken, celebrative outfits were set on fire. All he wanted to do relax, he felt like he’s been awake for seven days straight and his mind isn’t cooperating anymore, just begging to shut down for a whole month. By now, he was just acting like a wandering draugr. He really wondered how his father managed to handle this without breaking a sweat and dearly wished he was by his side, guiding him. 

His wife was by his side the entire time, shouldering half of the responsibilities. Even she, despite being quite tired as well (he swore he saw her take a power nap on top of a ladder last time), handled it better than himself. She seemed to be fuelled by a spark of positive energy. He remembered a few years back when the twins explained the change in their friends’ attitude towards the Midnight Sun, since then, Astrid found a dark place to sleep so she doesn’t get any more of those embarrassing memories again. What kind of Hofferson would ever call a Jorgenson handsome? Of course, the sun still had its effects on her, but her overzealous demeanour toned down to a bearable extent. While it did seem a bit overwhelming sometimes, it kept Hiccup’s spirits up. It was their first Midsummer as a wedded couple and he really didn’t want to mess this up. 

Today, however, she had suddenly requested to immediately go home after being done with only half of her duties done. For someone who prides herself on being so effective and getting the work done, it was very unusual of her to abandon her responsibilities. This worried Hiccup, so he didn’t object and watched her dash towards their house. He didn’t know how much time passed, the sun remained in its usual elevated position, but he felt like tonight will be a four blocks of ice kind of night. He felt like there was absolutely no progress made today despite getting up in the early hours. He couldn’t even track the time since the sun was barely moving. Some muttonhead decided it was a smart idea to open Sven’s sheeps’ pen and let the uncoordinated Vikings chase them like toddlers who could barely walk yet. If he could get his hands on that person, he swore he was going to get an earful that even his late father, Stoick, would be impressed by. He hoped that Astrid got enough rest so she can go back to being her feisty, short-tempered self. He would greatly benefit from that. The Berkians, despite being completely out of control, would never cross with a hot-blooded, axe-wielding Valkyrie and would sober up at the speed of light. 

Speaking of his beloved blonde wife, he saw her approach him with a smile on her face. Even though he was absolutely exhausted, he smiled back, her presence bringing him a sense of comfort. He extended his hand to her and she took it, bringing her closer to him, enlacing her waist, and pressing small kisses on her neck. She giggled in a very un-Astridlike way. 

“Well, I’m not one to object to this kind of greeting, but we’re in the middle of town and people are looking.” Astrid said as she observed around her. Gobber was covering a kid’s eyes. Some villagers had a dumbfounded expression on their faces, rarely seeing Hiccup initiating such an intimate gesture; apart from the occasional lip or forehead kiss. Others just cheered or ignored them. Hiccup let out a small whine and rested his head on her shoulder, keeping his arms wrapped around her form. 

“I missed you.” He whimpered.

“I wasn’t gone for that long, babe.” She replied as she stroked his hair. Her poor husband has the bad habit of overworking himself, and the fact that no one can distinguish between day and night definitely didn’t help. “Come home with me, I have something to show you.” 

“I’m sorry Milady, I still have work to do, we’re behind schedule and Midsummer is in a week.” His reply a bit muffled in her shoulder.

“Go and have yer fun, lad. You’ve worked more than anyone here and deserve some respite. And besides, how can ye refuse yer wife’s invitation?” The young couple turned their heads to look at Gobber approaching them.  “Ah, I remember when Stoick was acting just like ye, never knowing when to stop. It took Valka threatening not to share their marital bed anymore, snapped ‘im right out of it, and practically dragged ‘im home. The next morning they kept yawning all over the place, creating a chain of never-ending yawns. Now that I think about it, that’s probably how ye were concei-“

“-OKAY! That’s enough Gobber. I got your point.” Hiccup exclaimed in horror. While he was used to hanging around people that did not have a filter, Gobber was probably the one he feared the most. Since his best friend’s demise, the blacksmith has been recounting stories of him. Some were great to listen to, remembering the bravery and leadership of Stoick the Vast; but some were just better to keep to oneself. With the approach of the Midnight Sun’s peak, Gobber has gotten worse and Hiccup would’ve much preferred wearing the earbuds he made once during his encounter with the Death Song, just to save himself of the embarrassing images his mentor so crassly described to him. 

Astrid looked at Gobber with a mixture of disgust and amusement, before deciding to grab her stunned husband’s arm and pulling him towards their house, away from the growing crowd of curious Vikings. She hoped her parents didn’t witness this whole ordeal. 

“Astrid, I don’t think I have the energy to do what Gobber obnoxiously suggested, maybe-“ Hiccup said as he was being pulled by his wife.

“-Hush you. That’s not what I had in mind when I came to get you.” She cut him off, continuing to pull him towards their house. She let go of his arm once they crossed their threshold’s doorframe and closed the door, locked it just in case those nosy Vikings decided to rudely barge in. 

After being exposed to the sunlight for so long, Hiccup’s eyes had to adjust to the darkness of the room, illuminated by a couple of candles. He could smell a pleasant fragrant scent in the room and spotted their bathtub in front of the lit fireplace; the rugs been removed. Astrid led him to the bathtub and sat him down on the chair that was deliberately placed right next to it. She saw his questioning gaze.

“Gobber was right about you working harder than anyone here in this village. You deserve to relax a bit, take some time off.”

“You know I can’t afford to relax, now. Not when Midsommer is so close. Those sleep-deprived Vikings aren’t going to lead themselves, they can barely listen to me when I’m there. I’ll rest once we’re done.” He said, preparing to stand up again. Astrid pushed him down.

“I’ve asked your mom to take your place for a bit. She’s surprisingly unaffected by the sun’s constant presence. And she agreed that you needed a day off. Everyone could see how tired you are.” Astrid started unbuttoning his (GUARD STUFF). “And I want to take care of my husband. Will you let me?” Hiccup gulped, his words not coming out. He simply nodded. It’s been a while since she saw him being bashful around her. She gratefully smiled at him and pecked him on the lips. 

She proceeded to fully undress him, and took off his prosthetic, placing it within reach of the chair. Gone were the days Hiccup felt ashamed of showing his scar. Astrid made sure to show him how much he meant to her, leg or no leg. When he was coming home after a rough day of chiefing, she would give him his ice blocks and tell him to take care of his migraines while she took care of his leg, massaging it. She would sometimes bring it to her lips and kiss it, showing her appreciation to him. He would always beam at her every time she did this. She frowned when she saw the current redness of his stump, also spotting a blister forming. 

“Let me help you get in the tub. Just relax. I’ll massage your leg when I come back, I’m going to get some food from the Great Hall.” She said as she rose from her kneeling position. Her cooking did improve over time thanks to Hiccup and Gobber, but she wanted his day off to be perfect, which wasn’t the case for her cooking yet. She tried to make a nice intricate meal for the two of them, which is why she left so early. However, her attempts were all in vain as the food always ended up burning. In the end, she had to admit defeat. 

Hiccup grabbed her wrist. “Join me?” 

Astrid contemplated his words for a few seconds before nodding. She can grab dinner later. She wrapped her husband’s arm around her shoulder and helped him get into the tub. The water wasn’t too warm since they were in the hottest month of Berk, but it wasn’t cold to the point he would start shivering after being submerged for a couple of minutes. 

Hiccup looked over at his wife undress. He had seen her in this state countless times, even before they were married; but it always felt like the first time. He was the only Viking that she allowed to see her like this, with her guard down. Her body wasn’t unscathed. It was filled with scars and burns, proving that this woman was a warrior that has been through so many battles and came out victorious every time. She wouldn’t hesitate to swing an axe to a skull if someone ever looked at her funny. So, this woman allowing him to witness her in her most vulnerable state was an absolute honour to him, that he would never take for granted. Her scars were a part of her and accentuated her beauty and he made sure to always remind her of it. 

“Allow me.” He said as he extended a hand towards her. She knew what he wanted and turned her back to him. He rose, sat on the edge of the tub and pulled the leather band that kept her braid in place off. He slowly undid his wife’s braid, letting her gold strands cascade down to her lower back. He then gathered her hair in his hand and swept it over her shoulder, exposing her freckled neck and scarred back. He wrapped his arms around her waist and placed a loving kiss on the largest scar she had. A scar trailed from her right shoulder to the left side of her hip. She was proud of that scar as it was a reminder of her saving his life from an assassination attempt. During the yearly Thing meeting between multiple tribes, when the dragons and some Viking tribes were still cohabiting together, a spy has been placed within them, trying to poison the Dragon-loving Chiefs. Astrid and Heather caught on pretty quickly and managed to expose the spy in front of all the Chiefs. Being surrounded, no one expected the spy to suddenly lunge himself at Hiccup with his sword. Astrid, being the closest to him and desperate to keep him unharmed, had used her back as a shield. The wound hurt like Hel but it was worth it. She was so scared to have failed him as his then-General, she didn’t care that she put her life on the line to save his. A Chief protects his own, but it’s also the General’s job to protect the people AND the Chief. Hiccup wouldn’t let her leave his sight for weeks after that, eternally grateful and forever scared he was going to lose her that day.

“You’re absolutely beautiful.” He told her. His eyes were filled with wonder to this Valkyrie in front of him. She smiled gratefully at him and climbed in the bathtub, sitting opposite of him. 

She took his stump in her hands and started to delicately massage it, coaxing a few moans of relief out of him. Her nimble fingers were definitely a gift from the Gods. She managed to soothe the knots in his leg with great accuracy. All day, he had to focus on the utter chaos happening in the village that he didn’t have the time to focus on himself and his discomfort, ignoring the pains coming from his leg begging him to take the weight off of it. She carefully avoided the small blister forming near the bottom of the stump. 

“Mmmh, this feels so good.” Hiccup sighed with pleasure as he closed his eye, focussing on the sensation.

“You’ve been standing for too long, babe. I know the Midsummer celebration is stressing you out, but you’ve got to start listening to your body when it tells you to rest.” He opened his eyes, looking at her hands doing their wonders underwater. 

“I know, I know. But it’s a bit hard to do that when we keep progressing backward each day. I swear to Odin, every time I look away, someone messes up something, I just can’t do it.” Astrid’s hand rose to swipe Hiccup’s bangs back, revealing his beautiful green eyes. Since the start of the preparations a few weeks ago, he didn’t have the time to let her cut his hair.

“You can’t do it on your own. Remember, you have me. You have your mom, Gobber, Eret and the gang. We’re all here to help you. You just have to accept the help instead of shouldering most of the responsibilities. We’re willing to take some of the load off you.” She said as she grazed her thumb over his dark eye bags. “I can assure you that not only the work will get done much faster, but you’ll be more productive with a rested body and a peaceful mind.” She kissed his forehead. Hiccup wrapped his arms around her, making her sit in his lap. He savoured the rare peaceful moment he had with his beloved wife. She had the gift of shutting all the voices tormenting his mind and the gentle touch to relax his body in the blink of an eye. She was everything to him. He could be the best version of himself when she’s with him and never took her for granted; not since the betrothal gift incident.

“Just don’t forget you’re still human, there’s so much your body can handle before it shuts down.” She added. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I might have been pushing myself pretty hard.” Hiccup replied, raising his head to look at her. There was a warmness to her that he never thought she would ever have; especially directed towards him. He remembered her words of encouragement back on the clifftops, as he was losing hope. I am the person I am today because of you. Over the years, he saw how she started to warm up to him and the rest of the people. She had been trained for years to be this fearless, unemotional warrior. Back then, the fear of losing the people you love was at its peak, so she was quick to learn how to shut her feelings down and just train from dawn till dusk. Today, she was a softer and warmer person; which didn’t mean she was weaker by any means. But with the end of the Dragon War, she has found herself a partner that saw her as an equal. They both found themselves a new purpose in life and didn’t have to fear the threat of a dragon raid any longer, which allowed them to find happiness along the way. They were happy here.

Astrid got off his lap and reached for the soap that was earlier placed at a reachable distance. She looked back at him. “Soak.” And so, he plunged his head underwater before coming back up with his bangs fully covering his eyes. She stifled a laugh as did he. “I haven’t planned to cut your hair today, so I’ll do that next laugardagr, you think you can survive until then?” She started washing his hair with the soap in her hands.

“You made a whole schedule just to help me relax? A schedule? Did I mistakenly marry Fishlegs?” This earned him a pinch on his nipple. “OW! You know they’re sensitive. I did not deserve that!” She laughed as she brought her hands back to massage his scalp. The nipple pinching forgotten, his eyes rolled back into his skull, fully appreciating the head massage. “Ooh yeah, that feels nice.” Astrid brought his bangs back down to cover his eyes and gathered the excess foam and piled it upon his head in the form two horns. She exploded in laughter at the ridiculous sight.  “Wha- Astriiid!“

“You look like Snotlout’s pet yak! Oh Gods- I can’t!” She wheezed. 

Hiccup was not impressed and got rid of the foam and swiped his bangs back, exposing his frown. His small smile betrayed him though. It was rare to see Astrid lose composure and in a burst of full-blown laughter. It made him break his frown and laugh with her. 

“You, young lady, are in reeeally big trouble. Do you have any idea who I am?” 

“Yakkity’s long lost brother?” She joked.

“Okay, that’s it, come here you!” He grabbed her by the waist and started poking her sides, knowing very well she was ticklish there. “I shall not tolerate this type of disrespect on my island.”

She tried to grab his arm, but this time he was prepared and pinned her arms by wrapping an arm around her and continuing tormenting her with the other. How she wished they were fifteen years old again. “N-No- St-Stop!” 

“Then say, ‘My husband is the strongest and most handsome Viking in all of Midgard’. Say it.” 

“Hahaha, N-not on yo-your life!” Having minimal movement of her arms, Astrid tried to reach downwards instead of fighting the death grip he had around her. She pinched the inside of his thigh, so very close to his precious jewels, making him jump. “Astrid! No!” He stopped tickling her but kept his arm around her. 

“I will pinch higher if you don’t let me go, babe.” She tried to catch her breath from all the tickling.

“You’re awful, absolutely awful.” He whined as he let her go. 

“You’re lucky this is your relaxation time.” She said, a small glint in her eyes. 

“Oh yeah, what kind of torment would you inflict on your poor one-legged husband?” He challenged.

“Something that would require you to use your cane for the next day or so.” She fired back; a small, dangerous smile etched on her face. Hiccup’s eyes widened and he gulped. “But we’re both tired and I did promise to take care of my sweet husband, haven’t I? So, behave.” She flicked his exposed forehead. 

“Ow. How did I get myself into this mess?” He rubbed the sore spot.

“You kidnapped me and threw me on top of a tree.” She replied with a straight face.

“Fair enough.”

“Okay, you’ve had soap in your hair for long enough, rinse.” She ordered. He dived in again, washing off the soap.  

“Can I wash your hair?” He asked.

“But it’s your time off.” 

“Yeah, but it’s yours too. You worked just as hard. You deserve to be taken care of too.” He replied.

“You worked harder.” He rolled his eyes.

“Astrid, this isn’t a competition. I want to take care of my wife. Will you let me?” He grabbed her hand and slowly spun her around in the narrow tub and made her sit between his legs. 

“You’re always looking for an excuse to touch my hair.” She jokingly said. There was an element of truth though. He loved touching her hair, combing his fingers through her long strands. Since they have gotten married, he insisted on combing and braiding her hair in the morning. There was just something intimate and therapeutic about touching her hair. She was protective over it, never letting anyone but him touch it. The first time she let down her hair for him was during the incident that left her temporarily blind. She was not able to see how much soot covered her precious hair, so she entrusted it in his care. He remembers his heart beating so fast that he thought it was going to burst from his chest. He felt honoured, and has been craving to touch her beautiful golden locks ever since. 

Astrid on the other hand, hated when people touched her hair. It was her pride and joy (after Stormfly and her axe). As a child, every time her mom would braid her hair, she would always pull too hard, leaving her sore. The twins were more chaotic when they were kids. They would get away with anything because kids will be kids. As a prank, they decided it would be funny to set her hair on fire, forcing her to cut it above her shoulders. That day, she saw red and very nearly beat them to death. They were all severely punished for it, but no one has ever attempted to touch her hair ever again. He remembered that day very well, it was probably the first time he saw her cry. That’s when he learned how attached she was to her hair. The way she preened on it every night since they became a couple on the Edge reminded him so much of Stormfly. Her dragon always made sure there was not a single hair out of place after a flight. It amused him how she trusted a dragon more than Vikings to manage her hair. Stormfly had the gentle touch that Astrid craved someone to have. She always wanted her rider to look the best. 

“Well?” Astrid asked as she looked back. Hiccup’s thoughts were cut off. 

“Oh...Uh yeah, my bad.” He started to massage her scalp as she did him. 

“Okay, I’m done. You can rinse.” He said after working on her hair for the past couple of minutes.

She dipped her head underwater and got rid of the soap before emerging again. 

“Thanks.” She turned her head and smiled at him. 

“I should be thanking you; this whole ‘bath’ idea was yours. It felt nice.” He kissed her exposed shoulder as he embraced her.

“Well, don’t thank me yet. We’re not done.” She patted his hand.

“Not done?”

“What, did you really think that was it? Come on, let’s get out before our skin shrivels up like a prune.” She got out of his arms, turned around, and grabbed him. She helped him up and guided him to the chair, passed him a towel, and proceeded to dry themselves before taking his prosthetic and putting it back on his stump. She started to put her clothes on, so Hiccup followed suit until she stopped him.

“Nuh-uh, just wear a towel, I highly doubt you want your clothes to be stained with oil.”

“What?”

“A massage, Hiccup. I’m going to give you a massage. Gods, even a blind man would know how tense you are just by standing near you.” She answered.

“Why are you getting dressed then? Don’t I get to give you one?” 

“Next laugardagr, after I trim that overgrown mop of hair of yours. Gods have mercy on my shears.” 

“S-Shears?! And by the way, my hair isn’t that bad!” Hiccup dramatically exclaimed. Astrid rolled her eyes. “I’ve never seen a man with that much hair on their head, I swear if we shave everything off, we’ll have enough to make a scarf. No need for sheep anymore.” 

“First, I’m a yak, now I’m a sheep? Is that how you see me, Astrid? Nothing more than livestock? How you wound me.” He brought a hand up to his heart. Astrid let out a cackle.

“You are such a drama queen. Come on, get up your highness, there’s fresh meat to be tenderized before I chop it off and feed it to the village.” She helped him up and headed towards their bedroom.

“Please Astrid, can you be any more creepy?” It was his turn to roll his eyes. 

They finally reached their room. The shutters were sealed shut, preventing most of the light to penetrate the room. Candles were illuminated, giving off the same soothing atmosphere as downstairs, cutting them off from the agitated outside world. The bed was covered by a large towel, probably to avoid the oil soak into their sheets. Astrid made her husband lie down on his stomach, removed his prosthetic again, and sat on his butt. She started tracing his back muscles with feathery fingers which made him shivers. While Hiccup was still a lean man, he definitely wasn’t the same fifteen-year-old, shy boy that she found herself falling in love with. He quickly gained muscle mass thanks to dragon-riding and her extensive sword fighting lessons. Just like all the other riders, he started to lose some after the dragons’ departure a year ago. He remained, in her eyes, the most beautiful man ever.

 She caressed his back and leaned forward, pressing a kiss between his shoulder blades, making him sigh lovingly. He was clearly enjoying her pampering and she wasn’t about to stop any time soon. She reached for the small vial that was ready to be used from their bedside table and poured the contents in her hands and rubbed them together to heat it up a bit. Astrid proceeded to rub his shoulders first, trying to undo that visible tension. She added her bodyweight as she tried to loosen those knots that caused his painful backaches. 

“Mmh, yeah that’s the spot.” Hiccup moaned as she rubbed a specific sore area.  She continued her ministrations for a bit and slowly moved onto his lower once she was satisfied with how loose and relaxed his shoulders became. 

“How are you feeling?” She asked while kneading his legs.

“Like a newborn yak.” He replied, his voice muffled by the pillows. She sniggered, happy that he’s enjoying this so much.

Hiccup can’t remember the last time he felt this relaxed. He truly thought he was going to melt into a puddle under her magic hands. He knew he didn’t know when to stop working. His muscles could be aching and his bones could be breaking, but he never stops until someone does or until he collapses. He had big shoes to fill and couldn’t bear to let his village down. Not when his father did a tremendous job at leading. Once Stoick finally admitted to his blindness, he saw so much growth and potential in his son, and Hiccup did his best to uphold what his father saw in him. While Stoick had to lead alone for years, Hiccup couldn’t be any more grateful to have an amazing partner by his side, supporting him. He knew he wouldn’t remain sane had he lost her like his father lost his wife. He was no idiot. He saw how he struggled when his soulmate was believed to be dead and couldn’t possibly see a future without Astrid. She was everything to him and more. The entire village knew that.  They weren’t being led by the Chief and the Chief’s wife. They were Chief and Chieftess. Equals. One couldn’t function without the other. Some would say that they’re too dependent on each other and would lead the tribe to their downfall. But the Berkians knew better. Together, they were stronger than anyone.

“Turn around.” She ordered. And he complied. She sat back on his lap and leaned down to kiss him. He quickly wrapped his arm around her and savoured their kiss. They should do this more often. He missed having some quality time with just her. 

Just as his hands started traveling a bit lower, a large grumbling sound resonated across the room. They separated and looked at each other. The couple started laughing. 

“Well, someone is hungry. When was the last time you ate?” Astrid asked.

“Honestly, I can’t remember.” He sheepishly replied. She sighed. “Go sit in front of the hearth and let your hair dry. I’ll go grab some food from the Great Hall, I’ll be back soon.” She passed him his prosthetic and headed downstairs, leaving their household on the quest for food.

He doesn’t know how long he had been staring at the flames when she came back, a basket in hand. She approached him and sat on the floor beside him, handing him the food. 

“Thank you, Milady.” He smiled at her.

“Sorry about not having any meals prepared at home.” She timidly said, looking down at her bowl of stew. “I tried to cook something from my mom’s recipes but my cooking skills are still pretty subpar. No matter how hard I tried, it just wasn’t perfect.”

He recognized those words. It just wasn’t perfect. That’s why it took them so long to become a couple, to begin with. He knew he was romantic when it comes to being in a relationship. Even before he set his eyes on anyone, he already thought of perfect scenarios with his soulmate. All the gestures and gifts; anything to quench this loneliness he felt as a young boy. He wanted his partner to feel loved. That’s why the medallion incident hit him hard. Since when did he start neglecting Astrid, causing her to feel that exact same loneliness he once felt? He never thought she was a romantic, being a hardcore shieldmaiden most of her life. But he learned that she also longed for love, she was just better at hiding it. At that time, he was still self-conscious. He has never heard her telling him that she loved him, but hearing her share her insecurities, he realized that she has. So many times, through a variation of loving gestures that she reserved for him and only him. He felt guilty for being so blind, which is why he made up for it. She deserved the best. She deserved perfect.

“Hey.” He scooted closer to her, their shoulders bumping. “This seems pretty perfect to me.” She looked at him with wide eyes. “You have no idea how eternally grateful I am to have you. This whole thing you’ve prepared for me is just perfect. I love it. I love you. So much. Whether you managed to cook an intricate meal or just brought food back from the Great Hall wouldn’t have changed anything. You did this for me, and it made me so happy. And I get to spend some time with you. I couldn’t ask for more, Astrid. Thank you.”  He tenderly kissed her lips. 

“I’m glad.” She paused. “And relieved.” She confessed, a smile on her lips.

They happily ate in silence, occasionally striking a conversation or just randomly stole a kiss from each other; just enjoying each other’s presence. 

Their empty bowls were cast aside as they cuddled in front of the fire; savouring this rare moment of peace and quiet. Hiccup ran his fingers through her now dry hair.

“Will you let me braid your hair?” She looked at him for a few seconds before nodding and turning her back to him. He delicately combed through her silky golden tresses with his fingers, undoing the small knots and separated her hair into three parts. He expertly twisted the locks in a loose braid. Usually, Astrid wouldn’t braid her hair when going to bed as it provided a thin layer of heat for her neck. Winter in New Berk was just as merciless as Old Berk, but right now, they were approaching the hottest days of the year. While the air was still cool when evening came, she didn’t need that much coverage as the fire heated the room to a perfect temperature. 

Astrid passed the leather band that was hanging on her wrist to her husband as he finished tending her hair. He attached it and swept her hair over her shoulder. Placing a light peck on the nape. She shivered at the contact and fell back, trusting Hiccup to catch her, which he did. He pressed his lips on her now accessible forehead. She laid in his arms for a while, just relishing the feeling of having his arms around her and the small, tickling kisses all across her face. 

“Is this what you’ve been up to the whole time when you said you wanted to go home?” He asked.

“The failed cooking took most of my time.” She lamented.

“Did you have time to rest?” Astrid looked away. She knew she needed extra time to do the cooking, but she didn’t expect to fail that hard. In the end, it took much more time than she expected. Not that she felt like she needed a break, her husband needed it more than she did. But she was hoping to have more quality time with him. Unfortunately, after the fourth try, she decided to throw the towel. 

“I’ll rest when you do.” Just as she said that the blonde Viking let out a yawn. 

“Well, someone is getting tired.” Hiccup teased. 

“I’ve been tired since our beloved Goddess Sol decided to show off all her glory even more so than usual.” Hiccup fought back a yawn that didn’t go unnoticed by his wife. “Seems like I’m not the only one that’s tired. Come on babe, let’s get you to bed.” She freed herself from his embrace and got up, lending a hand to help her husband up too. They headed upstairs, leaving the dirty dishes for tomorrow. 

Once in their bedroom again, they undressed and put on their thin nightwear, hoping to finally get a comfortable night of sleep. They got in bed and Hiccup spooned her, letting her get comfortable in his arms. They sighed in content.

“Astrid?” He hesitantly called out, hoping she didn’t already fall asleep. 

“Hmm?” 

“Thank you.”

“You know you don’t need to thank me”

“I know, but you always seem to know what I need before I even do. So, I want to thank you. I really appreciate it. I love you, Milady.” He kissed the back of her head.

She squeezed his hand that was resting around her waist. “I love you too.” She sleepily answered.

He tightened his arms around her as he let sleep consume him.

Gods, how he loved that woman.

oOo

So this one-shot was written while I was writing another Hiccstrid story. I just needed a break since I was having a writer's block and I desperately needed some heartwarming fluff because the other one is heavy, at least for me it is. This one-shot could possibly have a potential smut scene one day, I just have no idea how to write those yet.

The other story will be posted soon, depending on how inspired I am. It's either going to be a long one-shot or a short chaptered fiction. To this day, I have written around 11K words, and it could possibly reach 20K. All I'm going to reveal for now is that Astrid is going to have a bad time. Hopefully you guys will be interested.

Also, would anyone be interested in a separate one-shot on how Astrid got that scar? I don't know why, I love Astrid so much that I need to read/write Astrid!Whump fics.

[walkingdaryls]

right here

pairing: loki x reader

request: Hi! May I request a Loki x Female!reader? One where Lokis nightmares are getting so bad that he has lost sleep and is terrified to sleep because he actually thinks that when he wakes up, the mortal woman (reader) hes fallen in love with will actually be dead and she is heartbroken by how much pain he is in so she comforts him? If you're ok with it, bonus points if she is pregnant with his baby and he dreams of Thanos killing her or she dies from complications

warnings: violence, nightmares, kinda angst, etc.

thank you so much for the request love!!!! i got so caught up while writing, that i realized i forgot to include the whole pregnancy thing. so sorry about that! i hope you enjoy it nonetheless :)

The night you realized Loki wasn’t sleeping was a few weeks after an Avengers mission almost went wrong. There’d been a slip up with keeping an eye on security. Backup was sent in to where you were hacking their security systems, flying past Tony’s radar, which almost lead to you being killed. Loki and Steve were nearby and managed to help you escape, thankfully. It was a close one, but you managed to get out unscathed, while also bringing down a few assholes.

It was kind of a near-death experience, but you managed to get over it after a few days. The mission was over, you and your team were fine, period. No need to fret.

Loki, on the other hand, was doing more than just fretting. After hearing your ragged breathing through his earpiece two-weeks beforehand, begging for help as you were held at gunpoint...Loki couldn’t get it out of his head, no matter how hard he tried. He’d seen slip ups during missions countless of times before, but this one just struck him the hardest. Seeing his mortal love barely make out made something shift inside of him. After that day, he found himself watching you practically everywhere you went. He kept an eye on you during training. Held you more tightly in bed at night. Held your hand during dinners. Kissed you harder.

Then the mere thought of losing you began manifesting itself into his dreams — well, nightmares.

Only it wasn’t just a playback of what’d almost happened during the mission. It was the same mission, same situation, except usually with gruesome endings. Instead of you making it out alive, Loki heard a gunshot go off, cutting you off mid-cry while he was stuck in the other room with Steve. Sometimes, the nightmare would end with him almost, almost getting to you on time, before watching your throat get slit last minute.

The nightmares progressively grew worse as the nights went on. They became more disgustingly gruesome. Your screams were amplified, cries shriller. And the worst part: he never got to you on time.

And after every single nightmare the first couple weeks, Loki woke up with a quiet gasp. He’d touch his forehead and feel it damp with sweat. His hand would shoot out gently towards you, just to make sure you were alive and okay. He’d never wake you, and thankfully you were a heavy sleeper, but he’d always watch you for a few seconds in the dark just to confirm that you were intact.

Loki felt punished by his nightmares. No matter how hard he tried, he never managed to wake up before you died somehow. Almost as if his own mind was forcing him to watch you suffer. It was pure, pure torture to him.

Loki used to relish in the idea of sleeping. Especially if he knew you’d be in his arms, wrapped deeply into him. But the nightmares took that from him. Loki began putting sleep off as a whole.

He tried staying up as late as possible and falling asleep only when his body was absolutely begging to. But even with just an hour or so of sleep, the nightmares still managed to show up.

He occupied himself with books, tea, whatever he could possibly do without waking you at ungodly hours. Because that was the thing about Loki — when it came to his own suffering, he kept to himself. Besides, he couldn’t bear the mere idea of telling you what he saw you go through in his nightmares.

His illusions made it easier to conceal his suffering from you. His dark under eyes and sickly pale skin were illusioned to keep his God-like features constant. And with you being so busy with minor missions and reports, you didn’t notice.

That is, until his exhaustion got the best of him, and he somehow forgot to put up his usual illusion before bed one night. The only light in the room were the lamps next to your bed, making you two glow slightly.

When you happily returned from the bathroom with your skin care done and pjs on, you audibly gasped upon seeing Loki.

“Oh my god,” You whispered. Loki looked up alerted, and immediately made his way over to you. He saw you cower just a bit, which made his face fall. Only a few seconds passed before he realized the mistake he’d made. He found himself not able to look at you in the eyes.

“Loki...” You whispered, reaching out to him, but he shamefully looked away. No point in putting the illusion up at this point.

You couldn’t believe the state he was in. The bags under his eyes were the deepest shade of purple you’d ever seen before. His glowing, pale skin had now looked gray, sunken, and lifeless. And worst of all, the mischief in his eyes seemed to be gone. It made your chest twist painfully. You couldn’t handle seeing him in such a state.

He tried his best to ignore you, and climbed into the bed, turning the lamp off. But you refused, and followed him into the bed. You reached over him, flicking the light back on. Loki attempted to turn it off, but you pushed his hand away.

You tenderly held him by the jaw, forcing him to look over at you carefully.

“Loki,” You whispered, “W-What happened?”

He shook his head, “It’s silly. Don’t worry about me, my love. Get some sleep.” He tried his best to keep his brave face, but the tears threatening spill from his eyes told you different.

Now it was your turn to shake your head, “No. Not fair. Loki, I do get to worry about you! I’m your girlfriend, and I deserve to know what you’re going through. E-Especially when it has you like this — in such a-a horrid state. What happened, Loki? Please. I-I’m scared.” A quiet, small sob escaped from your mouth. And Loki definitely noticed.

Loki’s eyes became desperate as a tear rolled down his cheek. His hands came up to his face and settled on top of yours that were still caressing him. He took a few seconds to find the right words.

“I can’t sleep, my love. I haven’t been able to.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, “Nightmares?” Loki’s eyes shut in desperation, not wanting to relive the image of your terrible dead.

“Y-Yes. The same one. Over and over again,” His voice had a bit of anger laced inside it.

“How long as this been going on?” You squeezed his hands gently, a reminder that you’d always be there.

Loki sniffer, “Ever since the mission a few weeks ago in Mexico. Where you...almost died.”

Immediately your heart sank. You saw the pain flicker in Loki’s eyes when he mentioned the almost-incident. And you suddenly felt guilty. You almost died, and you moved past it like nothing happened. Didn’t even check up on Loki.

“Oh, Loki. I’m so sorry. I-I’m so sorry. I should’ve checked in on your afterwards-“

Loki furrowed his eyebrows, his eyes widening in bewilderment. “My love, this is not your fault.”

“I should’ve made sure you were okay,” You whispered. Loki only spilled a couple more tears as he shook his head in comfort and rubbed your cheeks tenderly.

“You must be exhausted,” You said sadly, running a finger over the bags under his eyes. Loki exhaled, wanting to look away from your alluring gaze.

“I don’t think I’ve slept more than two hours a night for the past three weeks.”

You abruptly sat up all the way, “What?!” Your soft tone was now gone.

Loki’s head stayed against the headboard as he watched you carefully, “I-I’m terrified of them. The nightmares. Better to busy myself awake then let myself succumb to the terrors.”

Your shoulders fell in defeat, and you crawled back to Loki’s side.

“My God...” You breathed out, “Are they about what happened in Mexico?”

He meekly nodded, “Except they all end terribly.”

“W-With me...dying?”

At that last word, Loki couldn’t take it anymore. He rushed to sit up on his side of the bed, and held his head in his hands. He was now full on sobbing.

In the time of you and Loki’s relationship, you’d seen him cry a few times, obviously. But full on sobbing...that was different. And you hated it. You hated it because it broke your heart into a million pieces to see him in such a state. It pained you deeply knowing he didn’t dare to look at you in the eyes when he cried. You were still trying to teach him that vulnerability was okay.

Sniffing, you calmly made your way next to him, and didn’t hesitate to start rubbing your hand up and down his back. You didn’t say anything, not wanting him to feel anymore under pressure. Loki sobbing in front of you was already embarrassing enough for him.

You leaned into him, “Loki, I’m right here, okay?” He didn’t answer.

So you continued, “Baby, I’m right here. I’m alive, and doing just fine. Here with you. Okay? I love you. And I’m never gonna leave you. You hear me? Never.” You kissed his exposed neck softly.

“Y-You can’t promise that,” He breathed out.

“What?”

Loki finally mustered up the courage you look at you. He fiercely held your face in his hands. You didn’t dare move.

“In Mexico, I almost lost you.”

You smiled softly, “But you saved me. And I’m here now.”

He smiled too, but it was a small, sad one, “But what’s to say another mission like Mexico will never happen again? We don’t know that. And nothing, NOTHING makes me tremble in fear more than the mere thought of not being able to protect you. After every nightmare, I wake up with my heart practically in my throat as I check to make sure your body next to me is alive and breathing.”

You sighed, bringing his hands off your face, and into your own hands on your lap. You leaned forwards, placing a chaste kiss on Loki’s lips before speaking.

“Loki, whether you have noticed or not, that is my biggest fear as well. You are the love of my life. I love you so much, Loki. And knowing that there might be a moment where I can’t save you scares the living shit out of me. Trust me, it haunts me when I think to much into it. But that’s the problem, isn’t it? Thinking too much about it. I don’t want to scare you anymore, but technically, either one of us could die at any moment. But what good will it do to us if we’re constantly grabbing at that horrible thought? What good does it do to live in fear every second of every day?”

Loki was at a loss for words. He played with your intertwined hands in your lap with his eyebrows furrowed and mouth shut.

You released one of your hands, and brought it up gently to smooth out some hair that’d been blocking his face partly. Almost as if instinct, Loki’s body leaned into your touch. Loki inhaled sharply, and shut his eyes for a few seconds.

“You’re right,” He breathed, “But those nightmares — they’re what really terrify me. How can I not think about you dying, my love, when those horrid images of you drenched in blood terrorize my mind every night?”

You winced, continuing to run your hand through his raven hair, “I know they must be terrible. And-And I’m sorry. I hate you see you in such pain. But maybe opening up to me like you just did will help. You won’t go to bed with such a weight on your chest anymore.”

His eyes told you that he gained at least some hope.

You continued, “Second, as much as I know you don’t want to...wake me up if you have a nightmare.”

“No-“

“Shh!” You played a finger on his lips, “I don’t care if you don’t want to. Just wake me up. Knowing that I’m aware, and there for you could help you ease back into sleep. At least, that’s what my mom used to do for me when I was little...okay?”

He sighed, “Fine.”

“You need your sleep, Loki. Seeing you like this genuinely scared me. I need you to stay healthy and intact too, you know?” You watched him carefully.

His eyes flickered to yours, and he practically sighed in defeat. He hated seeing you so conflicted and hurt.

“I’ll try my best. Like I always do for you, my love.”

You smiled, a full smile, and pulled him into a kiss. His hands quickly made their way to the sides of your face, slowly deepening the kiss that practically made you melt for him.

Both of you broke away after plenty of seconds, but simply touched foreheads and remained there with your eyes closed.

“I’m here, okay Loki? And I love you.”

“And I, you. More than anything.” Another heavy kiss.

You pulled back, “Time for bed?”

Hesitating, he nodded slowly. You continued to hold his hands as the two of you lied down against your soft pillows.

Rolling to your side, you watched Loki with puppy eyes, “Would it help if we slept in each other’s arms tonight?” You and Loki always fell asleep touching each other in some shape or form. Holding hands. A hand on someone’s waist, and so on. But never full cuddling the entire night.

Loki nodded, looking at you as if you had stars in your eyes. He immediately opened his arms to you, and you happily obliged. Snuggled up into his chest, Loki suddenly felt much more comfortable.

You yawned before giving him a sloppy, yet warm kiss on his neck.

“I’m here. Always.”

And that night, Loki’s nightmares returned, but you were there this time to make sure Loki knew he’d always have you by his side.

Always.

[kickingitwithkirk]

Greetings From Austin

Pairing: Alpha!Jensen Ackles x Alpha!Jared Padalecki x Omega!OFC

Summary: Jensen and Jared are at odds over a monumental decision that changes their lives in a way they couldn’t have envisioned.

Word Count: 2616

Warnings: a/b/o, homophobia, bisexuality, biphobia, angst, cursing, self doubt, depression/anxiety, medical stuff, sexual dysfunction, infertility

*additional warnings to be added in future parts.

A/N: Here we go again with one my weird as hell dreams, series Inspired by this art.

A/N II: There is no intentional hate or malevolence intended towards any of the Ackles or Padalecki families. This is a purely fictional piece containing real and created persons/names/events set in the fictional A/B/O verse. Some dates/events altered to fit story.

*no beta-all mistakes are mine

*divider by @writeyourmindaway​​​​​​​

*images found online

Prologue

Austin, TX

Mid July

“Babe,” Jensen softly says in a low voice to the person seated next to him in the waiting room, “Babe,” he says a bit louder, still getting no response. Leaning close, he blows into their ear.

Jared starts, his “what” muffled by the finger he’s been chewing on.

“You know you can’t do that, don’t want you getting sick.” Taking his hand Jensen pulls it away from his pretty pink lips, gently caressing the finger. Jared had finally stopped chewing on his hands when Covid-19 became widespread.

“Where’s your gum?” Jared bite his lip not answering.

Sighing, Jensen shifts retrieving his pack and hands a piece to him. “What’s got you masticating again?” He inquires as Jared pops the stick in his mouth.

Jared chews the gum nervously weighing how to answer the question knowing Jensen won’t accept anything less than the whole truth. “What if something goes wrong again because of me.”

Jensen’s brow furrowed. He learned years ago that while their relationship is one of equals, he had to be lead Alpha when Jared’s mental state overwhelmed him as it had the last few weeks.

***

After the public announcement in March 2019 that season fifteen would be Supernaturals last, they had agreed when finished with the pickups they would take an extended break, return to Austin and concentrate on their marriage.

Jared intended to stop acting indefinitely, pursuing other interests and Jensen wanted to concentrate on his music.

Of course, things didn’t quite end up how they planned.

Jared entered negotiations to star in the Walker, Texas Ranger reboot, along with being an executive producer. Jensen got a call from Kripke wanting him for the role of Soldier Boy in The Boys third season.

But by March of 2020, everything came to a halt thanks to the Corona-virus.

The shutdowns left Supernaturals final two episodes with no definitive filming date and their seemingly never ending last season put their other projects on hold.

For the first time in years they had the luxury of a leisurely schedule, not having to be somewhere on a timetable, they could communicate with friends and family uninterrupted, deal with their other businesses, charities, etc, leaving most days free to enjoy being together without constraint.

But even amazing, awesome, vigorous sex on every horizontal/vertical surface that could support the two big Alphas only filled so many hours and like many couples, they started getting each others nerves and looked for other ways to stay occupied.

By late May, Jared was unable to sleep or eat, even going out of the house became a chore. When he hit a consecutive fourth day in bed, Jensen bodily dragged him into the bath for a desperately needed shower and loaded him in his truck driving to his doctor's.

Upon checking in they were told patients only allowed in the facility. Jared started panicking, saying he was having chest pains and couldn’t breath. He was rushed in with Jensen hot on their heels after morphing into an overprotective Alpha mate no one was stopping.

Jared’s doctor deduced with the lock-downs prohibiting him from his routine checkups and periodic adjustments needed to his medications triggered this episode.

The first step was to wean him off his current prescriptions and change to a newly approved, alternative regime. He was checked in a facility for ten days under observation while detoxing off his meds.

His therapist switched his twice weekly tele-counseling sessions to daily for the foreseeable future and Kodas certification as an emotional support animal was approved. His progress was slow but he was returning back to his sweet natured, big hearted, exceptionally tactical, overgrown puppy self.

When the surprise call from the clinic came a few days ago about an appointment opening, Jensen initially didn’t want it, still in his overly excessive protective Alpha mode. Jared’s outburst made him relent, fearing they were on a collision course for a major setback if he didn’t.

And Jensen, being Jensen, went overboard to ensure the appointment was absolutely private.

Part I

Jared was about to speak when a woman in scrubs called out, “Mr. Bonham and Mr. Page.” they got up crossing over to her, “Hello, I’m Sissy, Dr. Rodgers nurse, please follow me.”

They pass through the doorway leading through a maze of halls like that of any other medical clinic except this one specialized in a very specific service.

The nurse opens a door near the back of the clinic gesturing for them to enter the spacious office, “Please have a seat, the doctor will be with you shortly.” She closed the door and they sat down in the pair of chairs directly in front of the large, dark mahogany desk.

Jensen, scenting Jared’s nervousness, lifts his right hand kissing his palm, making him chuckle at the tickle of Jen’s soft beard before twining their fingers together and setting them on his left thigh, smiling reassuringly.

There was a brief knock before the door opened and an older, silver haired Beta entered. “Hello, I’m Dr. Rodgers, how are we doing today?” He asks, moving to his chair behind the desk.

Jared gave him a tight smile and Jensen remained placid.

The doctor raises an eyebrow, “Relax Mr. Page, this is just a visit to go over the paperwork before deciding about how we proceed, not the Spanish Inquisition.” Jared releases his held breath but couldn’t completely calm himself.

“I know the process can be overwhelming but I must ask, is there something we’ve done to make you uncomfortable?” Dr. Rodgers inquires.

“No, everyone’s been really nice, very professional. It’s just we..we had issues the first time we attempted to do this.” Jared finished his sentence quietly, in the recess of his mind; something bad is gonna happen and it’ll be my fault.

Jensen squeezes his hand tighter, instinctively sensing Jared’s mind was trying to spiral again, “When tried this before someone leaked our plans to the media. It wasn't ever proven the clinic was involved but...”

“We do everything possible to keep our clients anonymity protected here. All of our staff have been thoroughly vetted and sign NDA, given your professions, you're familiar with how they work. Your real identities will remain completely confidential, even if you choose to not proceed. It is why you chose this particular clinic, yes?”

“Yes, it is.” Jensen replied.

“How about we get this bit of paperwork out of the way, then we can have a more relaxed visit. I’ve gone over the applications you both submitted and have noted a few discrepancies in the medical section that need clarification before we proceed,” He opens the top file, “Mr. Bonham, why did you omit Genu Varum from your medical history?”

Jensen kept his expression neutral as he felt his stomach automatically clench. He had been mercilessly teased throughout his childhood about his bowed legs by his older brother Josh and later his buddies from school when they’d come over to hang out. By the time he was in high school Jensen’s extraordinary looks and personality were what got people’s attention first. Nowadays, many a fanfic waxed poetic about those bowed legs.

“The questionnaire inquired about inherited genetic medical conditions and since mine isn’t, I didn’t think it was necessarily applicable.” Jared hears an edge creeping into Jensen’s voice and gives their tangled fingers a quick squeeze.

“Did you see an orthopedist and were they able to determine what caused the condition? Did they suggest any surgical procedures or therapies to straighten your legs?”

“I was born a preemie, the orthopedists my parents consulted decided my condition was attributable to that.” Jensen replies tersely, dropping his vocal range. Jared gripped his hand harder, telling him to cool the attitude. “The doctor didn’t recommend surgery but sent me to physical therapy, thought it would help them straighten as I grew.”

“So no others in your immediate family have this issue?”

“Everyone my family has straight legs, including my three children.”

Jared piped in, “He hates it but he does have an exercise regimen; stretching, strength training. Oh, he also takes several different vitamins, omega oils, turmeric and extra vitamin D to support his joints.” They watched the doctor scribble a few more notes in the file before closing it.

“Mr. Page,” Jared sits up straighter in his chair, “I appreciate that you went into detail about your mental health status. I see you’ve recently been hospitalized, your medications have been changed to an alternative regiment and you’ve also increased your therapy sessions?”

Jared’s interview continued for another twenty minutes as Dr. Rodgers questioned him in depth about his depression and anxiety, feeling said anxiety ratcheting up so he focused on Jensen’s thumb rhythmically moving over his hand and used every ounce of his acting skills to appear confident and in control.

Dr. Rodgers closed his file, “I only have a few general questions left then we can discuss how you wish to proceed.”

After a more relaxed, genial conversation with the doctor, Sissy took them to a couple private rooms with paraphernalia to help stimulate them into producing a couple semen samples.

Jensen was getting close to finishing with his favorite spank-bank fantasy when he felt Jared’s frustration across their bond.

~~~

Jared couldn’t get aroused.

He felt as useless as his flaccid cock.

His doctor warned him that loss of sex drive could be a possible side effect of his new regiment until his body adjusted to it. He had struggled with temporary impotence a few times on his old meds, always fearful Jensen would finally see him as undesirable, no longer a satisfactory mate.

Rationally, he knew it was his illness causing these exceptionally hard to deal thoughts recently and the nagging idea this wasn’t the right thing for them to attempt again continually kept creeping in.

Jensen’s unspoken reluctance about having more children at his age was also weighing on his conscience, warring against his own biological longings.

They had a humongous argument when he told Jensen about taking the appointment. Jen thought this was the wrong time to attempt it again, pointing out he was just getting his equilibrium back setting Jared went off on a rant about how he no longer wanted him and would leave him like Genevieve had because he was too broken to deal with anymore.

Unmitigated anguish was written across Jensen’s beautiful features, the very notion that Jared could conceivably believe that he’d ever abandon him made his soul hurt in such a way no verbal language on earth could ever express his devastated feelings traveling across their bond.

***

Everything they’d been through; from that bar fight solidifying their friendship, Jared’s first breakdown, the years of living as roommates while secretly a couple to finding wives who understood their unique relationship and still married them both in 2010.

The joyous arrival of JJ three years later that unfortunately exacerbated Genevieve's frustration of not being able to conceive coming out with a vengeance at Jared. His unexpected breakdown in Switzerland was the final nail in their marriage. Gen was there for him but in the end it was all too much and she filed for divorce.

Shortly after, Jared’s iCloud account was hacked. It was believed, but never conclusively proven, that Gen was behind it since her lawyer was trying to break their prenuptial agreement, the videos documenting his private and explicit sexual relationship with Jensen were legally considered adulterous. In the end, the court upheld the legal document but the ramifications...

They were summoned to L.A. for the meeting from hell with WB executives, both convinced it was the end of Supernatural and their careers.

After the reaming out, they each received a weeks pay suspension to cover some of what it was gonna cost PR in time and money to deal with the inevitable repercussions and placate the show's sponsors.

How would the show’s fans react? Would they still be able to accept them as brothers only on TV while in real life they were involved in a highly stigmatized relationship?

When they returned to work there was an atmosphere of tension that hadn’t existed before. It was an open secret that all shows had their share of bitchiness and backstabbing behind the scenes. Jensen may have the thicker skin, keeping tighter control on his emotions, but Jared knew it hurt him just as deeply the loss of some of their friends because of prejudicial, social beliefs that two Alpha males shouldn’t be involved.

Jensen’s parents showed up unexpectedly in Vancouver a few weeks later. What started out as a not quite comfortable visit quickly deteriorated with his religiously conservative parents. They had not raised him like this and blamed Jared, saying he had corrupted him, leading him into a sinful lifestyle. He needed to repent and return to his wife to whom he had made a commitment before god.

Jensen blew up, replying it was none of their business, it was between them and oh, yeah, Danneel knew about them before marrying him and they better not say anything to her. Without another word his parents left. When he later called them to make amends, his mother coolly stated that he was no longer part of their family and to never contact them again.

Three months after the twins were born in 2016 came the finalization of Jensen’s divorce from Danneel, painful but congenial. They easily agreed on joint custody and still spent most holidays together. Jensen gave Dani financial security in their settlement, he wanted to make sure she didn’t have to worry about working again unless she wanted to.

All these years later, Jared continually has nagging thoughts that they had let everybody down. They received support when they publicly came out as bisexual then lost some of it when they married, being mocked for not coming out as gay.

***

There was another knock at the door and Jared ignored it, it was that nurse checking on his lack of progress again. The knock turned into pounding, “Jared, open this door now dammit!” He flinched realizing Jensen knew what was going on with him. Releasing the privacy latch and opening the door a crack he saw concerned green eyes only.

“Sorry, I thought you were that nurse,” he stepped away and sat back down as Jensen came in and re-latching it behind him. “She came to get me when you stopped answering,” Jensen said, walking over to him and started running his thick fingers through his husband’s long hair, “what’s going on babe?”

He glances up knowing that Jensen already knew, “It’s okay Jay, take as long as you need.” He paused at the unpleasant scent wafting around him. “If you’d be more comfortable we could do this at home…” Jared shakes his head, “There’s the risk of damage, contamination and or not able to get it back in time that could make the semen unusable.” Jared quotes from a website.

Jensen softly chuckled, “Nerd.”

Jared notices the bulge in his jeans, “You didn’t...”

“Drain the snake..choke the chicken..spank the monkey.”

“Fuck, okay, you didn’t! Stop using old man slang.” He shook his head smiling  at Jensen intentionally goading him.

Jared reached up for the hand playing in his hair, grasping it to draw Jensen down next to him.

“Jack, I don’t want to wait any longer on doing this. I love JJ and the twins, you know I do, but they'll always be yours and Danneels. I know the timing could be better... but I'm almost thirty-eight and I want my..our own pups running around the house driving us crazy.”

“For the next eighteen years?”

“Minimum.”

tbc

Part II

SPN: @donnaintx​​​​​​​​​​​​ @lyarr24

GFA: @babypink224221 @waywardjoy @let-me-luve-you @all-4-wincest

Sam/Jared @idreamofplaid

Dean/Jensen: @flamencodiva

[lexpressobean]

Parent/Teacher Night

In which Shikamaru steps in as Mirai's guardian to help her complete her unofficial assignment of the night and subsequently suffers from nostalgia induced shock from unforeseen circumstances.

**Modern AU, Mild Swearing, late 20-something adults who simply care about the same 10-year-old kid lol

Edit: Now available on AO3 too!

•••

Shikamaru had gladly accepted Kurenai's request for him to attend Parent-Teacher night with Mirai in her absence. It had been his day off after all, and he hadn't planned anything anyway. Plus, it'd only take, what, half an hour at most back and forth? Maybe he could even treat Mirai to dinner, just 'cause it had been a while. Normally, Kurenai would have skipped it all together due to her schedule, just this one time, but apparently Mirai's teacher was offering extra credit to the students as an incentive for them to have their parents come. And Mirai was very adamant that she shouldn't waste such an opportunity. Not for this teacher.

Shikamaru wondered what seemed to make this teacher so special to Mirai anyway. When he asked, Mirai seemed confused.

"You don't know, Shikamaru?"

"... Well, it's not like I've met the teacher either Mirai. But this teacher must be really good at their job if you like them that much already."

Mirai gave him a gleeful grin, "Watch, you'll see!"

And see he did.

Shikamaru wasn't expecting to run into such a classicaly "tall, dark, and handsome" form in the classroom. He certainly wasn't expecting that man to BE the teacher.

"Shino-sensei!" Mirai called, running over to greet him.

And at that, something froze Shikamaru in place. Something almost urgent... Wait... Shino? Shino... Why did that name sound familiar...?

The teacher turned just in time to take her glomp's impact with a deep, "OOF!" into his abdomen, and Shikamaru got distracted by the sound of his voice. Wow, deep... but then Shikamaru noticed his glasses misaligned in the process, and Shikamaru then realized they were... sunglasses? Indoors? Ha, this guy... Shikamaru wasn't necessarily gonna dock him points for that. But the only other person Shikamaru remembers doing that unironically was-

...

... Oh wait...

Oh... Wait.

OH. OH, HOLY SHIT!?

WAIT, THAT'S SHINO!? AS IN "SHINO ABURAME" SHINO!?!?!?

...

W H A T ! ?

"Ah... Mirai, hello. I thought you and your mother weren't coming. I told you it's okay, sometimes people can't come."

"Shikamaru came with me! I didn't want to miss the extra credit!"

"Shikamaru?"

"He's technically my godfather, so it counts, right?"

Shino stayed quiet for a moment and looked over towards the doorway where Shikamaru was still standing. As he recognized Shikamaru, Shino straightened up, gave a brief wave and... a smile?

Shikamaru was dumbfounded. Just a minute ago, he would've simply held up an open hand in response as he subtley and respectfully checked him out. Seriously, how could he not? But, now the movement of Shino's wave snapped him out of his thoughts and Shikamaru probably waved more than really needed to acknowledge the teacher. And he cursed at himself inwardly as soon as Shino looked back to Mirai. Was he blushing? It was feeling kinda hot in the classroom all of a sudden...!

"Alright Mirai, thank-you for coming, but for now please wait your turn, okay?"

"Alright!" Mirai walked back to Shikamaru, smiling widely proud of herself.

From far away, he could hear Shino's voice, "Sorry for the interruption. You see-"

"Surprise, Shikamaru!"

Mirai knew. This whole time. And the more he thought about it, Shikamaru at one point knew too. He just... simply forgot... Wow, what a thing to forget. Damn it, why didn't Shikamaru ask more questions earlier? Why didn't she just tell Shikamaru? Hell, why didn't KURENAI tell Shikamaru!?

"Yeah, I guess you're right..."

As Mirai led Shikamaru around the classroom, he started to try and recall more about Shino. It was all coming to him, slowly but surely. And if what he recalled was correct, this neat and organized classroom definitely would scream Shino. It was decorated with the typical posters meant to be both fun and helpful, and colorful and eye catching. Shikamaru even recognized many of the books in the shelves, though most he never actually read any of them. But there were traces of decorations here and there that were definitely conscious choices. Namely pictures of worms in apples, ladybugs, ants and bees symbolizing teamwork, things like that. Shino was a fan of bugs afterall.

Then Shikamaru found some board games and noted shogi was among them. He was tempted for a split second to pull it out and challenge Mirai to a game, but thought better of it. But what Mirai was most eager to show Shikamaru was her seat. Or rather, what was nearly right next to her seat.

In a terrarium, no doubt from Shino's collection if Kiba told him the truth, held a black and white worm. Except the worm had these orange like eye markings all along either side if it, and black dots in each eye shape... Shikamaru thought it looked kinda goth for a bug.

"We all decided to name it Daidai! Shino-sensei says this one will turn into a moth. Before Daidai, we had a catepillar we all named Marugao, because it's head was so big! But when he became a butterfly, he was so pretty, he almost shimmered!"

As Mirai gushed about how she got to sit next to Daidai, Shikamaru stole a glance at Shino once more. He was still making rounds, and it looked like no one else had come into the classroom either. Hm, looks like they were gonna be last.

Sunglasses had always hid Shino's eyes, ever since they were kids. Shikamaru couldn't quite recall if they were actually prescription or not, but up to this point, they had always been a constant. Otherwise... his former classmate really was virtually unrecognizable. And now that he thought about it, Shikamaru recalled that Shino had graduated from university with a teaching degree some years back, but this information had only been secondhand from Kiba on social media. Shikamaru wasn't even sure if Shino had social media...

Meanwhile, Shikamaru had barely been back in town for still less than a year. It wasn't his fault if he didn't know Shino's business. Medical school was gruelling, and anesthesia was no joke.

But still... Shikamaru had been expecting something similar from Shino. Maybe not a medical doctor, but a doctorate? Hadn't he been in the Environmental Club in high school? He seemed like he would've been very interested in the natural sciences, and definitely had the means... It was just kind if odd. He was an academic star that was always competing with both Ino and Sakura for top of the class as far as he could remember. And those ladies had gone to school to become a Pediatric Psychiatrist and Pediatric Surgeon respectively too. They were all a smart bunch, no doubt about that.

Yet, Shino had always been... different too. He had looked like a troublemaker with the beanies he wore, and his messy, nearly kinky curls always managed to find a way to stick out in the back. And he always had baggy looking clothing on in layers during any kind of weather. Plus he had a bad case of RBF Syndrome too, which would alarm a few others because he was always so good at blending into the background, yet when noticed, he looked like the kind of guy that would mess you up for just breathing funny. He had always been taller than most too, that probably didn't help.

But he wasn't a bad kid at all. Not like Naruto and Kiba anyway. Acording to Kiba, Shino's loner tendencies were due to simple shyness. And he would know, as Kiba and Shino seemed to grow close after they opted to join the Environmental Club separately in high school, which happened to be run by Kurenai-sensei. And that's all Shikamaru really knew, because when Kiba would come out and about Shino hardly ever came. Kiba could be pushy, which is how Shikamaru suspected the pair became friends in the first place, but apparently not enough to enjoy a party or things like that together outside of school... Maybe once or twice? Not even at Naruto's insistence could make him a regular, as Naruto was... an "unofficial" member of the Environment Club. Meaning he'd just crash the club's outings when they did plant specific activities. Naruto had a green thumb after all.

Actually, it always seemed like Kiba and Naruto were those extroverts that had the habit of adopting introvert friends so to speak. Funnily enough, their respective adoptees had already known each other too. But Sasuke was even LESS friendlier than Shino, and even Shino seemed annoyed with him, one of those rare times he let his thoughts show in his expression...

But today, in the yellowish glow of the classroom lights... something was definitely different. From his smoothed out hair tied up into modern bun on his hatless head and his open, light duty trenchcoat that really... accentuated his very... broad, adult figure... It was most definitely different... but the most dynamic change of all had to be that Shikamaru had never seen Shino so soft in the face before. Behind those shades, he looked... relaxed, and when he spoke, it sounded so... nice? Definitely not a bad thing at all...

And suddenly there was a hand in front of Shikamaru's face.

"-kamru...Shikamaru?"

"HUH!? What?"

... Oh... Hell, he spaced out.

"... Shikamaru, are you okay? Busy day at work at the hospital maybe?"

HUH!? How did Shino know that? "Uh! Yeah, kinda..." he shook his head, "Well no, that's not it, today was actually my day off. I worked yesterday. Still a little out of it looks like," he added with a casual chuckle. At least he hoped he sounded casual.

Shino frowned, eyebrows knit into concern. Ah man, how embarrassing! Had Shikamaru been caught starting with a dopey look on his face?

"... I'm sorry, maybe extra credit was a bad idea this time around. Mirai is so dutiful, I didn't mean for anyone to be dragged here."

"What? No way, I wasn't dragged here. Mirai is my Goddaughter, Shino, so I'm perfectly ready to be informed about her progress. I agreed to come, it's no big deal."

The now teacher looked at Shikamaru with a slight head tilt to the right... And then another small smile. Wow, he really had to stop doing that!

"Well, all in all, Mirai is actually doing very well. She already excels in her studies and is easily one of our most engaged and top students at this time. She's still young, but she shows a lot of scholarly promise."

"Ah, I see. Do... do you see any areas in need of improvement?"

"Well, there's always room for improvement of course. But in Mirai's case..."

Shino looked over at Mirai who was at the snack table. She had walked over to get a couple of cookies and was seemingly cornered by a classmate into a chat.

"... I think, she could benefit from some encouragement to be more social."

"More social?"

Shikamaru followed Shino's gaze and saw Mirai talking to her classmate, her expression showing patience more than anything... It looked like the other little girl was chatting up a storm.

"Don't misunderstand, she's definitely a team player and is very respectful. However, her maturity level is above many of her classmates. As a result, she tends to prefer to study on her own..."

Well, that rang a bell. Shikamaru could've sworn that Shino was the same way back then. But Mirai didn't resemble Shino at all.

"Is she quiet?" Shikamaru asked.

"Oh, no, thankfully she's still quite engaged. If anything, sometimes she may overthink things. I've noted she's a bit of a perfectionist, and so is actually a little slower on average during tests, but she's an avid question asker too. If she just had some more confidence in her self and would... relax a little more, I think it'd be good for her. She's still a kid after all, she should feel allowed to act like one."

That was a strange thing to say... Did Mirai... not feel okay?

"... She's Kurenai-sensei's daughter, so I try not to favor her. It's kind of hard when she used to ride on my shoulders during reunions and things like that though."

Shino gives a small, warm smile in Mirai's direction. And Shikamaru is kind of touched. Despite the shades, his fondness for Mirai is so obvious. It makes Shikamaru glad to know she has Shino to come to during school time. At least that was something....

Then, Shino turned back to Shikamaru, who was TOTALLY not staring just now.

"But it's necessary. She's... too comfortable with me... If earlier didn't make that obvious."

Shikamaru did have it in his mind to scold Mirai about that, but that was a talk for later. More private.

"I had meant to bring this up with Kurenai, but Mirai also... has had a habit of staying in the classroom during lunch and recess. I've had to move to the teacher's lounge during just to get her outside..."

"What? Really?"

Shino nodded, eyebrows knitted and a smile that showed a regretful sympathy.

"... I wonder what that could be about..."

"I suppose some kids find it hard to socialize, but she needs a more... balanced perception of boundries. In no time, she'll have her own mother for a teacher too. Otherwise, she's generally doing pretty well."

Shit. Shino was thinking way ahead, Kurenai was a high school teacher. But... he was right, this couldn't be allowed to go on.

"Shikamaru?"

"Hm? Yes?"

"Did you have any more questions?"

"Uh... No, I... don't think so. But, even though I'm sure you don't have to be asked, please, continue to take care of her."

Shino perked up a little at that before smiling at Shikamaru again! It made it hard to stare him in the face, "Of course."

... Damn... Was Shino's smile... always this cute?

"Shikamaru! I brought you a cookie."

"Oh, thank-you."

"Did you want one too Buggy... I mean... Shino... sensei?"

"... Buggy?" Shikamaru repeated.

"... Ah, Sensei I'm sorry, I did it again...!"

Shino pat Mirai's head, and gave a small chuckle even. Shikamaru was all ears, "It's okay Mirai, I'm know you're trying. No offense taken."

"I really am, I promise!" she assured, "So did you want one?"

"No thank-you Mirai, it's for the guests. You go ahead."

"Okay, sensei."

Shikamaru couldn't help it. He just had to say something.

"Hey Shino."

"Yes?"

"You must be pretty suited to teaching."

"Oh? What makes you sat that?"

"I mean... It's been a while. Actually it's been a long time, but... well, I don't think I've ever seen you quite like this before..."

"Pardon?"

"I dunno, you just seem... Very much in your element here. I'm glad the whole instructor thing really worked out. You've been here for a few years already, haven't you?

"Oh... Thank-you, Shikamaru... And yes, I have. I appreciate that."

This time Shino GRINNED. And Shikamaru suddenly was very aware of his... jawline... uh...

"Y-Yeah, of course! Well, I'm sure there's other parents you need to talk to..."

"Right, that is true." A couple more stragglers had come in.

"But here, hold on a sec," Shikamaru pulled out his phone, "I don't think we've ever traded information before. Wanna trade now? I'll send you a text back."

"Oh," Shino was a bit surprised, "Um. Okay, sure."

After getting his number, Shikamaru sent a text and could hear one of Shino's pockets vibrate.

"There, all set! Thanks for talking with me, Shino."

"Thank-you for coming. And if you're not terribly busy, I trust you will be the one to come when Kurenai-sensei is unavailable?"

"Yes. Yes, that'll be the plan," Shikamaru decided right then and there.

"Alright, thank-you Shikamaru."

"No, thank-you. C'mon Mirai, let's go. Goodbye, Shino.

"Bye Shino-sensei!"

"Goodbye."

-

"Shikamaru! Can we go eat something? I'm starving!"

"What do you want?"

"Yakisoba!!"

"Haha, alright, sure."

Mirai gave Shikamaru a sudden and huge hug.

"Whoa, what's up?"

"I'm just so happy you came, Shikamaru! So thank-you!" she beamed.

It tugged on Shikamaru's heartstrings a bit. She really had missed him, huh? "You don't have to thank me, Mirai, but your welcome anyway. C'mon, let's go."

"It was nice that you and Shino-sensei got to see each other again too, don't you think?"

"Uh, yeah, it was quite the surprise. But a welcomed one."

Hmmm... It looks like Kurenai was gonna have to be unavailable for the next few parent-teacher nights....

••

I kept tweaking it and tweaking it until I decided to simply stop. So sorry for any grammar or syntax errors, but I just needed to get this out of my system haha